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2024-11-01
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2025-05-17
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Harry Potter and the Appearance of Senility

Summary:

Harry finds fascination with the Flagrate spell from the Chamber of secrets, but that's not the only lesson he learned from it. He has noticed how both Gilderoy Lockhart and Albus Dumbledore are treated and wants to emulate them both in order to get away with whatever he wants to.

Notes:

This is something I have occasionally added to when I was bored.

Sadly for the story, time is short and I will not be able to add much more to it. Between the rapture, Tribulation, and the incoming world war, I will be unable to finish.

I urge you all to accept Jesus as your Lord and savior before this happens. If not, upon the rapture happening, it should be the first thing you do. This is a warning: Look (it) up, see the signs.

Chapter Text

Flagrate. It didn't seem to be the most useful spell, but oh did it intrigue Harry. Not only was it a trump card for all these bigots, but it had so much versatility, it could even be used for games like chess or checkers. Full scale reenactments, or quidditch plays? "...and wards. Even small things like enchanted stones use runes though I'm not sure when we delve into practical applications..." Hermione was making good points toward taking runes as an elective, especially with his new fascination with a writing spell. The question was, did he pair it with arithmancy or go for magical creatures instead? From the 'brief' overview Hermione gave him, it was really a matter of did he want to use runes with established arrays or did he want to be able to improvise.

'Scratch that, with what passes for logic around here, there's no way I should stick to established information. Besides, I can always get a bestiary or two instead of going to an actual class for creatures.'

"...must be so fascinating how the wizards think of muggles. It really is too bad there isn't a wizard studies so us muggle raised can catch up on information. So, what have you been up to while I was petrified?"

"Believe it or not, I've been in the library, studying. Maybe you will be able to find more applications that I missed. Flagrate!" Harry quickly set up 'I am Lord Voldemort' and then slowly made up runes and demonstrated their possible application with classes.

"Oh! That's really amazing Harry! I see what you mean about applications." Then with a grimace she added, "And is that part real? I'm not sure how I feel about that. Especially with how it might affect the purebloods." When he grinned at the last sentence, she knew he was planning something potentially problematic.

After teaching Hermione the spell, he suggested they check out a rune scheme and test it with their new spell. It took them until lunch to find something simple enough to test the concept out. So, after lunch they took to an abandoned classroom to test the levitation rune scheme. It took them a long while to work out how to get it to function properly, but it did work. The theory had enough promise that they would both be practicing for the foreseeable future.

Sadly, before too long, it was time for them to leave Hogwarts. The end of their second year had come and they really didn't want their new testing to stop. They spent as much of the train ride as they could practicing their writing in air, but then it pulled into the station. Ron was less pleased, though being able to make a chess board wherever had its perks.

Harry knew this summer would be even more disappointing than the last. But he had time to think and plan. Also, muggle school supplies, just in case. The fountain pens might help his handwriting, while still keeping up with the appearance that was required of them. And the notebooks would be good for his new ideas with spells and runes, not to mention graphing paper if runic spacing was an issue. He also got to thinking about the school year. Dumbledore and Lockhart got to do pretty much anything and never get called out on it. Not only that, but even when caught, they seemed to be able to get out of it with useless platitudes and a smile. Maybe it was time to try something stupid. Something extreme. Luckily, Harry was able to find some books sold nearby that contained stupid things to say, but sounded wise. They were actually making his time at 'home' worth it. While he didn't like the attention, he was getting it anyway. And this way would make it a lot more fun.

His summer was going fairly well until Aunt Marge showed up. There was nothing to be done about it, but she flat out crossed the line. Harry was out the door as soon as he got all his stuff packed away, he really needed a magic trunk. "Come on Hedwig, we are leaving!" He didn't even bother with the cage, time was of the essence and he was tired of having her locked up at all. He would have to get her a nice stand like Fawkes had.

They ran down the end of the block and a little bit further before stopping. Nobody was following, yet. "What now girl?" Harry was petting her as she bumped his head and cooed. He stopped when she suddenly tilted her head off to the side very intently. He followed her line of sight to a dark shape emerging from some bushes. Harry grimaced, he hated dogs. Marge saw to that. It was a large black dog, head down, skinny, and the thing that stopped him from pulling out his wand was the low whimper. He was too soft. Hedwig also wasn't moving like she was even bothered by its presence. She just watched it. "I'm sorry, I don't have any food for you. I don't even have food for me. Just owl treats and some Bertie Botts." The dog approached slowly, head still down but no longer whimpering. Hedwig jumped off Harry's shoulder onto the street between the two of them hooting softly.

The dog's ears went to the side as if it was listening for something, before slowly lowering himself to the street on his belly. Hedwig bobbed her head, gave him a hoot and turned back to Harry, before doing a couple short hops toward him. Harry took a few calming breaths before going over to the dog tensely. Then, they were all right next to each other. Harry let out a deep sigh, putting his hand on the dog's head. The sound the dog made was between a grunt and a groan, but it wasn't aggressive. "What are you doing out here anyway?" The dog looked away from him and whimpered. Hedwig took that opportunity to tap the dog, beak to nose. That made the dog give off a chuffing sound, and for the first time that night, Harry had a smile on his face.

A while later, Harry sighed again, "Now what? I have no idea where to go." The dog gave a sad sound before nudging his pocket gently. Harry pulled out the wand he was nudging, "No, I will not play fetch with my wand." The dog seemingly rolled his eyes before slowly nudging Harry's hand upward, giving it a sharp flick at the end. Hedwig and Harry were suddenly startled by the triple decker bus that appeared out of nowhere. There was no way this was a coincidence.

"Welcome to the Knight Bus..."

"Uhh, sure. How much for the three of us to get to the Leaky?" The dog perked up at that.

Stan scrutinized them for a few seconds before giving Harry a quote. "It'll be 13 Sickles so long as your dog ain't a bother."

Harry quickly pulled Hedwig onto his shoulder and gave a stern look to his new dog while Stan took his trunk on board. He had his escape. The ride was not ideal. Thankfully, they all fit on one bed and it wasn't too horribly rattling of a ride. Just not something he would do again if he could help it. Maybe there was a happy medium between the Weasley's car and the Knight Bus.

Upon his arrival at the Leaky Cauldron, he got to meet the Minister for Magic, Cornelius Fudge. He was quite pompous himself and Harry was considering breaking out his new persona right then and there, but he may have been in trouble. 'Although, that is why I was thinking about doing it in the first place. May as well start somewhere, and with somebody who doesn't know me yet.'

"...and your aunt has been deflated and put to rights. The incident removed from their minds. You really should be careful about such things."

Harry pulled himself up a bit and turned to the side before tilting his head to the side, "Ah yes. That really was unfortunate business. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him think. I do appreciate all the trouble you have gone to, even if they are so very uncivilized." He made sure to add a tut for emphasis while putting his arms on his hips and giving as winning a smile as he could to the minister.

Cornelius just gave him an odd look and coughed into his hat, "Yes, well... Uh, try not to stray out of the alley and whatnot. Good to meet you Mr. Potter."

"Always good to meet a fan. I'm sorry I can't offer you an autograph, why I've run out!" Cornelius shuffled out the door, trying his hardest not to look back at the young celebrity. The dog, on the other hand, was constantly making grumbling sounds through both paws being over his snout. After he left, Harry relaxed and let out a breath, "That was kinda fun. I'll have to get used to it though. Wizards really don't have a lick of sense." He made sure to get a meal sent up for him, and several sides of meat for his companions. Once they got settled into their new room and finished eating, he turned to the dog. "So, what am I gonna call you?"

The dog nudged Harry's pocket once more, getting him to take out his wand, before pointing with his nose to the table. Harry gave him a sharp look, but he put his wand on the table and returned to the bed to sit. He crossed his arms and stared at the dog. Sirius backed up a tiny bit to give some space, sitting tall like it was a show. Then he began transforming. Harry was startled and just about lunged for his wand before he heard the man speak, "...Harry?" It was so soft and questioning that he stopped and turned to get a good look. He was the guy that was announced as wanted on the telly. The escaped killer. "You look so much like your father." Harry was stunned and had no idea what to even think about this man anymore. What sort of wizard showed up on muggle news and was this gentle. There were several opportunities for this to go poorly, but none were taken. "Can I?" Sirius pointed to the wand on the table.

At Harry's stare, Sirius went ahead anyway. He tested the feel of the magic before casting at the door. Locking and silencing charms. He gazed at the wand forlornly before handing it back to his godson. "Who are you and what do you want with me?"

"Sirius Black, I'm apparently a killer. I came here to find you, to keep you safe. Has that rat hurt you?"

"Rat? And I should trust you, why?"

"I'm your godfather, Harry. And yes, that no good, sniveling, slimy, traitorous rat!" His voice grew with his anger. He calmed down only slightly, noticing Harry pulling away as his voice rose. Sirius took this time to approach Harry for a hug. "I'm sorry. For going after him, and for yelling. Azkaban... wasn't pleasant." The hug was awkward, but Harry let it happen. Someone came here for him. He had family!

"Why did the muggles say you killed a bunch of people and escaped prison?"

Sirius tensed and let out a breath, "I was thrown in prison without a trial. But then I saw a newspaper a few weeks ago, some drawing winner. And what do I find? The rat that framed me!"

"I think my friend Ron's family won a drawing..."

"Yes, them. Their rat has a toe missing, doesn't it? The same toe that was found when the traitor blew up the street!"

"Scabbers? The rat is an animagus too?"

Sirius looked vindicated, "Yes! I'll kill him, then I'll be free!" The flat look Harry gave him toned down his exuberance. It was then that Sirius remembered the interaction with the minister, "So what was with you and the minister? You were making this old dog laugh."

"I was thinking over the summer. Dumbledore and Lockhart can get away with pretty much anything. A smile here, random nonsense there. A little crazy seems to go a long way."

Sirius was stunned, "Genius... How can I help."

"Do you know any charms or spells to do some of the things they do? Or Snape's snappy cloak?"

"Hmmm, a few. Wait, Snape? Snivellous is at Hogwarts!?"

"I guess? He's a bit of a tosser, though I'm not sure why."

Taking a few breaths, as to not snap again, Sirius sighed. "That may be a bit of our fault, your father's and mine. We were known for pranking around the school a lot. And well, he was a bit of a favored target."

Looking away Harry responded, "Snape's a bully..." He let the implication hang there, unwilling to voice it.

"Some of it, maybe. It was a different time. Pureblood supremacy was ramping up, He was recruiting." Harry nodded, still unsure how he felt about such things.

They took the next month to spend time together and plan for all sorts of fun to be had. Sirius really liked Harry's idea, it was like a long-term prank. One where there was no victim. The odd looks Harry got from Madam Malkin were worth the charmed garish robes he ordered, though he refrained from making too much of a fool of himself. From there, he got himself a trunk upgrade so he wouldn't have to lug so much everywhere, and some new books for runes. Before the end of the summer, he would come to know more useless spells than all the gossips at Hogwarts. And they were both finally able to eat their fill.

They headed down from the rooms to the main section of the Leaky, it was getting close to lunch time, and they couldn't always be reclusive.

Naturally, they arrived in time to witness Ron and Hermione get into an argument. "Hermione, you keep that beast away from us!"

"Honestly, Ron. He's a cat. What did you expect?"

Scabbers bit Ron and attempted to run away, but before anyone could do anything, a large black dog snapped it up by its neck. "Scabbers!" Percy, Ron, Arthur, and the twins all had their wands ready to fight for the rat when Harry intervened.

"Padfoot! No! We talked about this." Harry waited for the acknowledging whimper before continuing, "Sit!" Sirius sat, still holding tightly to Wormtail. The twins were awestruck and mouthed 'Padfoot' to each other, arms going slack.

Arthur took command, "Uh Harry, any way you could call off your dog? Scabbers is old and fragile."

"Of course, Mr. Weasley. But it might be better if you called the uhh, magic police?"

Arthur gave him a questioning look, "Whatever for? We should be able to solve this ourselves."

"Umm... I have reason to believe that 'Scabbers' is in fact Peter Pettigrew." While the bar was mostly empty, there were a few people there, and he now had everybody's attention. Peter, on the other hand, was squirming as much as he could without damaging his spine from Sirius' jaws.

Percy was the first one to object, "You are saying, that my old pet rat, one that has been in the family for over 10 years. Is a dead person that was either transfigured or is an animagus?" He was so incredulous that even Harry was thinking how insane it was.

"When you put it like that... still yes. He is an animagus. Missing, of course, the one finger that was found when he disappeared. Quite a coincidence, no?" It was that, more than anything, that made Arthur finally believe there was something to Harry's story.

Arthur pointed his wand right at Peter and spoke to his son, "Percy, go get the aurors. Tell them... we may have new information on a murder and need protection." With that, everybody went silent. All the patrons of the pub were waiting on the edge of their seats for the end of the story.

Harry rolled his eyes, "So, Hermione, what's with the cat?"

She glared at him, "Seriously, Harry?" At his nod, she crossed her arms, "I couldn't just leave him there, nobody else wanted him. And what did you do to your glasses?"

"Ah. You like them? I took some inspiration from the headmaster. Somehow, it actually made the glasses work better for me. I blame magic." It was her turn to roll her eyes, only Harry could do something like that.

It was then that the aurors arrived, "Arthur, what is going on?"

"We have reason to believe that the rat that the dog is holding, may be Peter Pettigrew. And if he is, there should be no reason he would have hidden with my family these last 10 years. He's supposed to be a hero."

Slowly, Scabbers was turned into Peter, sniveling and crying the whole time. "It was Sirius! He made me do it!" The auror's response was a stunner. It was decided that this was above their paygrade, so they took him in. Hopefully some veritaserum would get to the bottom of this.

Harry was really getting into surprising people, "So, who's up for some ice cream? My treat!" A few of the patrons and Tom actually took him up on that, along with the whole Weasley troupe. Fred and George waited for the perfect opportunity to isolate Harry. They needed this.

"So, Harry. We couldn't help but notice what you called your dog." "We were hoping you could enlighten us as to where the name came from. We happen to have heard of such a name from an amazing artifact." Sirius perked up from a few tables over.

Looking around suspiciously, Harry leaned in to whisper, "You wouldn't happen to be talking about the Marauders would you?" Their excitement was all too obvious, the nodding only made it worse. "Nope. Never heard of 'em. The name just came to me." It was hard to decipher the new look on their faces, "Besides, we are eating ice cream. With a spoon. Forks have too many Prongs for such a food." Sirius was making all sorts of strange noises now and looking almost like he was having a seizure. The twins looked at each other before staring at the laughing dog.