Archive of Our Own ^beta

The turtles really liked to nest, apparently. 

Mikey snorred, tucked into his left side, popcorn long forgotten in his lap, drifting ever closer to spilling onto the floor. Raph leaned heavy against his right, his arm hugged around Caseys in a way he'd vehemently deny doing so in the morning. Donnie was on the floor of the pit with one leg overlapping Caseys, having sprawled out in his sleep. Leo was in the bean bag closest to Mikey, having been the last turtle standing before the ebs of sleep managed to catch up with her as well. 

The only light illuminating the lair at the time came from the television, playing a sense abandoned rerun of Space Heroes. Pillows and blankets Scattered all around them 

It was the first weekend since Casey’s moved in with the turtles and it was ... strange. But that was probably mostly on Casey as he was still reeling from the absolute mortification he felt after having burst into sobs in front of the guys. He still felt embarrassed just thinking about it. And to celebrate his first week living with them, Mikey insisted they have another movie marathon. Pizza, popcorn, and no caffeine allowed. Leo aimed that comment more towards Casey and Donnie . 

And now being the only one leff awake, Casey stared at the T.V. distantly. Non-committedly watching along. Mind mostly elsewhere. Drifting. 

Life in the sewers was odd, not bad, but odd. It was just so … different. Lively .

Mikey making breakfast for the family in the morning. Early morning training. The guys having a video gaming competition. Raph and Splinter painting. Leo and Mikey reading comics. Leo getting on Donnie's case for his caffine consumption…Just... normal day today that was so different… then what he was used to. Sure, he missed Angel, more so than anything else, but it was … nice? But also sad, in a way? 

Like he was happy here and he enjoyed his time living with the guys but something about seeing them live their life outside of all the danger and the fighting made something in his chest tighten. It was nice but also … bittersweet? The guys kept him around and involved but he couldn't help but feel like he was intruding.

The weight on his right side shuffled, tucking itself closer and Raph grumbled. “Sh-udup," he grumbled. Casey blinked down at Raph and snorted. “ What ?” He whispered, trying not to wake the others. "I didn't even say anything,” Raph huffed, "Y’ur thinkin’ to loud… I can smell the smoke burnin’ out ‘ya ears." " Hey !” Raph snickered and gave a tired grin. "But seriously, what's the matter?” Raph sighed, only half awake leaning into Casey's side. Casey shrugged, shaking his head, “Nothing, Man.” he said, “Dont worry about it,” 

This answer only served to dissatisfy Raph, said turtle pushing himself straighter slightly and giving Casey a tired glare. "Cut the crud, man. Somethings up, I can tell,” Despite the serious tone in Raph's voice, the tired pout on the turtle's face nearly made him laugh. "I'm fine, man. Really. Just... adjusting. 's all,” He explained, tiredly looking back at the T. V, screen.

The lair was quiet for a moment. “Is it about 'your dad?” Raph asked into the silence. “...” “...Do you wanna talk about it?” He asked. Casey sighed, "I don't know…” He answered into the dark. He knew Raph wasn't just going to let him forget about what happened a week ago,  but it still felt so fresh. “ I don't know what his problem is…” Casey furrowed his brows, glaring at nothing. "He's… awesome when he's… sober … ” Casey sighed, trailing off. “He said some really messed up stuff at your place, man,” Raph recalled. 

Casey balled his hands into fists and leaned more into Raph's side. “... I know… ” His words wanted to choke in his throat. “I just don't know why he blames me…” He stopped momentarily to swallow the lump in his throat. “He once- … Once a few years back…When his drinking got really bad… He said he wished that I was the one that got sick instead.” He admitted. “ Case…” Casey wasn't looking, but Raph sounded as wounded as Casey felt. 

“It's stupid . He was drunk . It's dumb . I know I shouldn't listen to anything he says when he's been drinking but he can just get so nasty. " He played with the string of his hoodie. “It's like… Jekyll and Hyde… One minute he's the greatest and the next he's fucking…” Casey grumbled, trailing off. “It's dumb. It's stupid. just forget it…” “ No ,” Raph said firmly. “It aint fuckin' dumb , and im not going to just forget. It's fucked up. Your dads fucked up.” “ Raph… ” “What? It's true!” Raph grumbled. “People lose loved ones all the time and they don't go about telling their kids that they regret them being born ,” Raph spat quietly, “They don't wish their kids were dead !” Casey flinched, shoulders hitching and throat tightening.

“... Sorry, Case…” Raph said after a quiet moment, Casey's shoulders still tense. Casey swallowed, “It's cool…It's fine…” Raph sighed, untangling their arms to wrap his arm around Casey's shoulder and pulled him in closer. “I'm sorry, man,” " It's ok ,” “But it's not ,” “...” Raph sighed.

“How's your side? Is it hurting any?” Casey shook his head. “...no…” Casey blinked heavily, sinking further into Raph's hold. He was relieved that Raph dropped the topic for now, he knows that Raph will be on his case about this again later but he was done with it for now. Even thinking about his dad filled him with complicated feelings that made him feel exhausted . "...Maybe you could stay here a bit longer?" Raph hesitantly suggested. “After you're fully healed?” Casey hummed non-committedly. “I'm sure splinter wouldn't mind… And I know the guys wouldn't.”

Casey thought about it, for a hard good minute. “...maybe…” He liked it here. It was nice here. And his home life was so chaotic right now and the last thing he wanted was to dump his problems on the guys. Not with everything they had on his shoulders already. “Maybe?” “ Maybe… ” He muttered, head feeling limp and heavy, leaning it on his friend's shoulder. And once his head mad contact and settled all lights went out and he was out cold.

"Are you sure I can't go beat the shit out of him?”

"... I'm considering it,” Leo responded quietly in the dark. Raph sighed,  leaning into Casey's side as he watched the television. “I knew his home wasn't the best… but it's still shitty to think about,” "I know Raph,” "...” “...” “Can't we just keep him?” " Raph !” Leo scolds quietly while the lump of shell on Casey's left started convulsing with barely repressed giggles. “Mikey,” Leo sighed disappointedly. “How long have you been awake?” Mikey snickered into Casey's side. “Mmmm…not long. But I wouldn't argue with keeping Casey. He's warm ,” Raph rolled his eyes, “That's because he's warm blooded and we're cold blooded, idiot,” Mikey grumbled, tucking himself closer, "Mmmm, whatever it is, it's nice,” he sighed, quickly drifting his way back into sleep.

“Well," Leo sighed, “I know that If Casey's stays, Mikey wont be leaving his side this winter,” Raph snickered, following Mikey's lead and tucking himself close to Casey. “I cant blame him,” He sighed, “He's like a space heater,” Leo snickered, rolling her eyes as she pushed herself up off the bean bag to grab a blanket to drape over his three brothers and one for Donnie. Then she grabbed one for herself and settled back down in her bean bag, watching Space Heroes for a while longer before falling back asleep where she sat.