Chapter Text
As we got out of the car, I looked over towards my apartment. I heard a sigh from behind me. I try to imagine it wasn’t because he didn’t want to be here. But I was starting to think he wanted nothing to do with me.
Why am I even doing this? I don’t think he even cares. Or cares to even tell me what the hell is going on in his life? Like damn! We get it! Being a farmer sucked but that bad? Some of the shit he says doesn’t add up. I can’t even search up shit about what he says because there is literally nothing on it. Search ‘Thawra’, I find shit about the “Change of Red” movement. Boring ass politics that have nothing to do with a farm in Vietnam. Search ‘Kirishima farm Vietnam’, and nothing even remotely related comes up. It was like Kirishima was really off the grid. It pissed me off more than anything. There was no way that was the truth.
“You’re right,” I heard him say as we got into my apartment. I felt lost as I turned to face him. Well as much as I could face him. Seriously, why did he have to grow like the Green Giant?
“What?” I snapped. I watched as Kirishima stalked over to the island in my kitchen and took a seat, thinking that what he was going to say actually meant something. I followed him to it as I faced him on the other end of the island.
“You’re right, Bakugou. That guy from the airport knew me,"he said. His eyes were downcast as if sad to mention it. As much as it bothered me at his pouting, I allowed it for the betterment of my curiosity.
“And?” I say crossing my arms. Shit, I sound like my mom. Not a good look.
“I met him on the farm. He came from Thawra hoping to expand the farm and buy it from us. He acted like the money he offered was enough but I knew he was just lowballing us. So I scared him off. I didn’t think the farm meant this much to him,” Kirishima explained. His sad eyes are framed by stray hairs of his. How could a man of his caliber look like a sad puppy I had no idea but I knew I couldn’t stand it for long. I was getting really tired of this sad act he’s been honing. Acting like he didn’t leave me. Er- us.
Shit. Well, now what? If his grandma was that sick wouldn’t it be better to leave anyway? I never really knew Kirishima’s financial situation but I could only assume it wasn’t the best. Back in high school, I felt like he knew me better than I knew him. Now, that was completely true. I felt like I was talking to his corpse. Cold, quiet, and almost lifeless.
That wouldn’t stop me though. “Huh. Weird.” I said plainly. I didn’t know what to think. What did he want from me? Every time I think I know how to reach him he gets farther away. There was no way I was giving up.
After all, he did the same for me when I first met him, right? I was a real asshole. Deku rightfully hated me after bullying him for years. The rest of our class wanted nothing to do with me, some even seeing me as a joke or just a stepping stone for success. My teachers thought I was a senseless teenager who wanted nothing but violence. My parents thought I would forever stay a succeeding but selfish brute. Hell, even villains saw me as one of them just because of how I acted to be the best.
But Kirishima? He didn’t. I didn’t believe his intentions were good. I thought he just wanted to reap the rewards of being friends with a powerful future hero. I thought he was annoying. A nuisance like his friends. But after getting to know him and helping him I started to think he wasn’t so bad. I almost considered him a friend.
That all changed when I got kidnapped by the League of Villains during the summer camp. When the whole thing with All Might fighting All For One for the last time was happening, I thought I was going to die. I thought I was forgotten and unloved enough that no one would care if I died from the League that day.
Then Kirishima came with his hand outstretched and reaching for me. I could see he managed to get some of our classmates to come too. As he flew over the battlefield thanks to Todoroki and Iida’s quirk, I felt like I was dreaming. Then when he called to me I used my explosion quirk to fly to hold his hand. I never felt more grateful to someone in my life.
Even afterward, I couldn’t believe it. I later found out that Kirishima arranged the whole rescue plan himself. I heard from Deku that he freaked out and yelled at the class when they tried to shut down his idea. At first, I thought that everyone else was a bunch of dicks for not wanting to help me but then I remembered how irrational it was to ask that of kids. And yet Kirishima still went along with it. Even after how shitty I treated him.
After that, I paid Kirishima back for the equipment he got for the mission and made sure to value him more like he did me. Even though I didn’t deserve it. After that we were best friends, practically inseparable. He was the reason I was able to be confident enough to make friends with his friends. Now they are still friends with me to this day. He was why I felt humble enough to apologize to Deku after the years of mistreatment. He was the best part of my years at UA. Kirishima was the reason I was able to change. He was the reason I grew into the man I am today.
I remind myself this every time I am pissed at him. After all, his patience is the reason I’m here. He made high school a cherished memory. I’ll reach out my hand for him to take until he accepts it.
The problem was how.
“I’m real tired. So I think I’ll pass out in your guest room if that’s alright, Bakugou,” Kirishima said to me after a yawn, interrupting my mind. I barely opened my mouth before he was gone.
Shit. I was trying to talk to him. And I lost the opportunity again. Every time I get close he runs away. I felt a flash of frustration flow through me as my brows came together. It was almost impossible to approach this.
Ugh. I knew what I had to do but I wasn’t sure I had the strength to do it. Ah, what the hell I can take tomorrow off. It’s not like someone can take my number one spot in a day.
I open my phone and search for a group chat. I opened the group chat named, “Dunder Heads.” I smiled at the name I gave those idiots. Shit- focus. I then type in “We need to meet now”. I sent it. Then added “Emergency”.
Then a text from Mina came up almost instantly. Of course she was on her phone, when was she not? “OMG you texted first? It must be an emergency! Is someone dead?” I groaned at her words as I typed out. “No idiot.”
Then there was Kaminari’s answer, “Dude! I knew you loved us! He wants to meet for drinks for sure. Life of a celebrity.”
I typed again, “Shut up we need to meet.”
Then Jirou’s text came saying, “Anxious, are we?” With a stupid smug emoji.
Then Sero’s came, “Rough day at work? I need a drink too.”
“Lets just meet up! Lets go to that stupid bar near Tokoyami’s agency.” I typed fast.
I then read their agreements. I was glad they had a free night even with all of us now fully fledged heroes. But either way I was glad they had my back.
~~
I got to the bar and saw Kaminari and Jirou being all lovey-dovey outside of it. I rolled my eyes but mostly used to their shared romance from high school. After all, their agencies were joint now. It was like they were practically married in hero society. Kaminari looked plain with a t-shirt and dark jeans. Jirou’s outfit was definitely less elaborate and more comfortable with grunge aspects. I then saw Sero pull up with Mina in the passenger seat. I noticed their casual wear was anything but casual as Mina wore an elaborate outfit of pinks and blacks. Sero wore a stylish fit in earthy washed colors.
I walked towards them. I was probably not going to drink tonight seeing as I brought my car. But that didn’t matter to me.
Mina smiled at me, her pink skin practically glowing. “Bakugou! I can’t believe you set us up to meet that hasn’t happened in like forever!” Mina squealed.
“Yeah, dude! You got us thinking you're dying or something,” Kaminari added. I saw his girlfriend roll her eyes with a smile. Sero nodded with a chuckle.
“Just come on,” I grumbled as I walked into the not-so-busy bar. But we went into a big booth in the corner like we were last time. I didn’t wait to tell them why I needed their help. I explained that I didn’t know how to talk to Kirishima after the whole him dropping us thing.
I was wondering how to start when they started updating each other on their lives. Evidently, Kaminari and Jirou had been great. They were cooing to each other small things that only made sense to them for a moment until Mina turned heads towards her. She boasted about the recent advertisement she did on toothpaste and how good she looked in it. Sero agreed with no sarcasm in sight which made me raise a brow. I saw Mina uncharacteristically answer shyly at his compliment. Kaminari and Jirou seemed too busy with themselves to notice it. But of course my lonely ass did. I retrained an eye roll. Great, now all my friends are hooking up.
“Okay! But are we going to talk about the emergency Bakugou talked about?” Mina suddenly asked in a slightly higher pitched voice. Her face was slightly a deeper pink than before.
The eyes turned to me as the others seemed to remember I existed. “Right,” I said as I cleared my throat from any bile from my previous thoughts. “This is about Kirishima.” It felt weird to use his name instead of a nickname like I used to. But I was starting to think it wasn’t appropriate for whatever we were right now.
“Oh! I’m glad you brought it up. I wanted to talk about it with you for SO long and-” Kaminari babbled as Jirou cut him off.
“Of course, we only wanted to talk to you if you were comfortable with it,” She said resolutely. There were nods at the table.
“Yeah. I didn’t even get to see the guy after all this time, yet. I was hoping you brought him along,” Sero said, slightly hurt from the meeting he missed.
“I don’t think he would want to see any of you guys at all in fairness,” I grumbled at the cold version of someone I once knew. I look up and see their curious eyes. It was almost like their ears grew in eagerness.
I sighed as I said, “He’s… different.” Was all I could think to say. I felt pissed off at myself for the pathetic explanation.
“Different, how?” Jirou answered.
I looked down at myself rubbing my own knuckles. “Different like he acts weird. He’s bigger now. Stronger. Super quiet and super sketchy. It pisses me off,” I say. Now strange to formulate what I thought to them.
They looked confused. “He isn’t acting like himself? He seemed fine with us. Maybe it's because of his grandma?” Mina added. I shook my head.
“I guess,” I trailed off, pissed at the fact they seem to believe it. Was it strange for me to question him? Why did it feel like I was the only one that thought he acted weird or different?
“No offense, but maybe it's you?” I heard Sero say quietly. There was an awkward silence as I looked at the guy. I could feel my face frown, my upper lip curled.
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I said with a bit of bite.
Sero paused for a moment glancing at our friends before looking back at me with a sheepish smile. “No offense, but don’t you think you might be too… brash?” He asked leaning back in his booth as if I would start spitting fire.
As if he wasn’t the one spouting bullshit. I scoffed as I said, “Brash? That asshole doesn’t react to shit even if Crimson Riot comes knocking on the door.”
“Maybe you need to stop asking questions and wait until he answers,” Jirou said. There were nods from the others.
I looked confused at them. I looked at the plates we ordered came from the waitress. We thanked her as I started to contemplate Kirishima’s new attitude. Not asking anything? Then would he ever tell me what the hell was going on with him. Then I thought harder as I drank some of my udon. Kirishima was a force to be reckoned with. Unbreakable inside and out now. But I wondered. Maybe that was how he got to me. He wouldn’t break and finally he broke the walls to me.
Maybe with him it was different. Maybe with him it was soft and slow. Maybe it wasn’t like waves crashing and making a rock spiked. Maybe it was like a calm steam that smooths stones. Kirishima’s method with me was different from mine with him. I was the brash one, he was the endless smile. I didn’t realize what I had until he left.
“Hey! How about you hang out with him? No stress! No work, no questions, no heroism, just you and Kirishima. That should help him trust you again!” Mina said happily.
“Yeah! Maybe you guys can go to the arcade like you guys used to. Or! Maybe you guys could do a pottery lesson together! Or! Or!-“ Kaminari babbled until Jirou smooched his lips to stop him. He stopped as his face blushed like a lovesick child.
“Or just watch a movie at your apartment. Play video games there with him. Maybe show him your new interest in Crimson Riot?,” Jirou teased with her earlobe jack pointing at me. There was agreement among them. I grumbled as they smiled.
Kirishima would like the collection I’ve obtained over the years of missing him. I didn’t think it was that bad until Deku was telling me I was like him with All Might merchandise. Midoriya was not someone I wanted to be compared to when it came to that.
But to be honest. I always thought of Kirishima as I set up the collection. I used to imagine his smile and excitement as he looked at even the most vague mention of his favorite hero Crimson Riot. When Kirishima was gone, I would see the old hero merch and buy it. A glimpse of his smile that flashed through my mind made it easier to go on day by day.
Next thing I knew I grew a collection of Crimson Riot merchandise. I found myself actively searching for rarer items and more expensive items as I imagined his grin to grow more and more. Kirishima’s sharp teeth like a shark grinning so widely it hurt was what I imagined.
Deku didn’t mind helping me with my new hobby. He even seemed happy to have someone with him to find more for our collections. Although, my collection was nothing like the superfan Deku was. I always thought it was a bit absurd for someone who literally was the closest to All Might. But as long as I got more Crimson Riot merchandise I kept my mouth shut.
So I paid for my friend’s food and left early. Thanking them I left. I opened my phone as I went into my Porsche as I hovered my finger over the call button. I let shame bubble in my stomach as I moved my finger to text him instead. My heart was beating slightly faster as I asked simply, ‘want to hang out in my apartment for a movie or something?’.
I knew I was being a bitch but I couldn’t help the doubt that came from every action I made with Kirishima nowadays. There wasn’t an immediate response so I just threw my phone on the passenger seat as I drove to work. I would just train to clear my head. Easier than thinking anymore about this.
~
There was an answer from Kirishima that made me almost crash my car on the way back. I didn’t care for the road safety laws as I opened my phone and looked at what it might be. There was a simple, ‘sure man when?’
My heart pounded as I let a big grin out. There was no one looking at me anyway. I felt giddy as I parked my car thumping my steering wheel with my palm with an affirming “yes!” a couple times.
I felt like an idiot as I went into my apartment realizing I didn’t answer yet. I fumbled to get my shoes off as I put my house slippers on quickly.
Now? No that’s desperate. Tomorrow? Mehhh good enough. I text back ‘you free tomorrow at 5 pm?’ I held my breath as I dropped my phone and threw it on my bed. I paced the room as I waited. Then another ping caused me to sprint to the phone tripping and falling off the bed instead of landing on it. I groaned as I got up and then quickly swiped my phone off the cushions.
‘Sure man I’ll drop by’ was the answer. I felt pride in myself in my ability to accomplish what I’d been dreading. Then I felt a stray thought think wow how desperate can the number one hero get? I ignored it. For Kirishima, it was worth it. He thought the same once.
I looked at the lone light in my dorm light up. I looked away from my bed where it lay as I swiveled my chair to face my desk. Another text from Kirishima. How desperate could he get? What was he even going to say to me after that?
My thoughts swarmed on Kirishima’s bag filled with illegal drugs. So many packages. So many charges he would face. What would happen if he got caught? He would be expelled for sure. Forget about being a hero. With the amount he had, it had to be assumed it was for selling. Why bring it to the school? Was he trying to sell them here?
No. Not even Kaminari was that stupid. He must have been selling them somewhere else. But the deal went wrong. There were bullet holes in his clothes. I didn’t even see those clothes in Kirishima’s heaps of laundry before. He bought them to get messed up then. So this was new? Unless that’s where he was going every time he went out of the school to hang out with his old friends. He mentioned a guy named Tomo before. Maybe that was code for drug dealing or something?
Damn it! What the hell is going on with that guy? First he ran out of the class when that stupid rumor made the class second guess where he came from. Then he brings back drugs from hell knows where! What next? This wasn’t normal.
Kirishima didn’t technically say no when asked if he had killed his parents when he was younger. That made me feel sick to my stomach thinking my best friend would hide something like that. But if it were true, why the hell would he be in UA. Much less, in class 3A?
I tried to open my laptop to do some homework to get my mind off this but I couldn’t. I was glad there was no class today but also pissed off that there wasn’t. I wanted answers. Why the hell did the school suddenly think Kirishima’s ass was so interesting? Maybe it was because he won the Sports Festival? I did the first time. Todoroki last year. Now Kirishima.
Was that reason enough? I got some rumors about the attack with the sludge villain. Nothing like this to this extent. Hell, I yelled at some class B chick for saying shit about Kirishima the other day. I know she wasn’t the only one. I can see the way people look at him and it pissed me off. Most of these cowards were cheering his name in the Sports Festival.
Now? I didn’t know what to think. I wanted to defend him. Find some way to explain why he was acting off and doing weird shit. I was popping my fingers as I tried to think of what I’d do.
Kirishima was my best friend. He helped me every step of the way to get to where I don’t hate myself for what I do. He was the only one I’ve even considered seeing constantly after UA. I couldn’t imagine a world where he wasn’t near. When we were choosing agency areas in cities I couldn’t help but feel horrible when I saw Kirishima was in Osaka and not with me in Tokyo.
Kirishima was the bringer of light in my life. I guess I trusted his ability to hold the light more than I should have looked into the shadows he was hiding.
The afternoon came but I was no closer to understanding the situation than before. Should I ignore him? I knew there were plenty of texts waiting for me but I didn’t even want to know what he might be thinking. What if he was lying? I knew he was capable of it but I was horrible at it so I’d know. Or would I? Why did I never think of his parents? I guess I’m too consumed in what I do in life and what he’s like to care. I always felt I knew him well. Did Kirishima not want to tell me even after all this time?
There was a knock at the door. At first I didn’t notice it as I was in my bed. I didn’t even realize that I didn't do anything all day but worry about what was happening. Then another knock came. I got out of bed and dreaded speaking with him. I didn’t even know what to say. Much less think.
I opened the door and felt myself let out the breath I was holding. It was just Mina. She looked tense though. “What’s with you?” I asked gruffly.
“You know the whole rumor with Kirishima and him running off?” She asked quick to the point. I nodded. Great, not even a new topic.
“Well, it turns out it was true… at least that’s what we think,” she said as I suddenly felt irked by the conversation.
“What do you mean?” I grounded out trying to keep my temper. I didn’t need to be yelling at her since she knew Kirishima well too. Must be something they both hid from us. But seriously? Mina keeping a secret felt impossible.
“I mean we asked Aizawa if you knew about the rumor and he didn’t say no! He must have known!” Mina’s dark eyes widened with shock. The electric yellow of her pupils made it stand out.
“Hold on. That doesn’t mean yes either. Student confidentiality must exist too. But I don’t think Kirishima has the capability to do that. Kill your own parents? Does that sound like him to you? Obviously he didn’t if he’s in school right now. Maybe they are dead but definitely not murdered by him. Just think about it,” I explained, almost convincing myself. But I knew I was just covering up for him as a way to convince myself too. After the drug thing, I wasn’t sure what to think.
Then Mina nodded thoughtfully. Her bubblegum skin on her brow creased as she thought about it. “Yeah… you’re right. Kirishima I must have left because it was hard for him to talk about. But I’ve seen his dad… maybe it’s just his mom?” She asked looking up as I shrugged unhelpfully.
She just pouted as she continued, “Yeah, anyway, he hasn’t come out of his room and neither have you so we were wondering if you guys were talking about it together. Are you guys, okay?”
I stiffened as I subconsciously glanced at the wall I shared with my best friend. Hell. I should just talk to him instead of being a bitch. It may be that we were in a weird situation right now but the only way to get answers is to ask.
“Was gonna talk to him right now actually,” I said as she got the message and left with a quick goodbye. Most likely hoping I could explain this all to her later. I would probably say something to put her mind at ease. After all, if she was anything like me it was tearing her apart. But I’d only tell her enough for her to get off his back realistically. After all, Mina and I were probably the least close out of the friend group. Our personalities clash a lot was all I could describe it as.
I walked over to Kirishima’s dorm. “I know you're in there. We gotta… talk.” I paused, almost regretting my decision. But I fixed my posture. I wasn’t a bitch. I can talk to my best friend whenever I like, thank you very much.
The door opened quickly. The air actually whooshing with the movement. My eyes widened as I looked up at him. Curse him for growing a few inches over me this summer.
“Bakugou…” Kirishima said almost breathlessly. It was like he was looking at me for the first time. Taking in the sight of me. I decided it was only fair to do the same as I noted his shabby look. His shitty red dyed hair was even shittier, messy and flat. His eyes looked irritated and with bags he was sporting for the last few weeks. He wasn’t wearing a shirt. He was wearing only his boxers. They were big and with dumb little sharks. His muscles were a bit distracting when there was a snail trial teasing me.
I felt my heart quickening as I looked at him. Then I finally looked back up to his eyes. I mentally beat myself up for visibly checking him out but I was glad I still held my scowl. I cleared my throat as if it was clear my gay ass head. “Are you going to let me in or am I just going to stand out here like an ass?” I asked flippantly.
Kirishima mumbled assurances as he opened the door wider and let me walk past him. As I came in I immediately noticed the backpack from last night peeking out from under Kirishima’s bed. I turned my head away as I stood near his Crimson Riot poster on the far wall from the bed. I crossed my arms as I looked at him.
There was a pause. “I don’t know what to say,” Kirishima said softly. He seemed lost. Hopeless.
“How about you start with your freak out in class?” I offered. Straight questions, straight answers right?
“Um… I was overwhelmed. I don’t like to talk about that shit, man. My p- mom was the one that died. But something like this happened when I was… a kid. So I freaked.” Kirishima explained. His eyes were glossy like he was going to cry.
I looked out the window that wasn’t covering the sunlight coming in. It usually is never dark here. Today it was, besides a few rays of light. I drummed my index finger on my bicep for a second before looking back at him saying, “And the drugs?”
He looked down. “I have this friend… he got into some trouble so I took him to the police. But he left the bag. I- didn’t know what was in it. But if I give it now he’d get in trouble,” he said, looking still stressed.
I held my gaze to his feet as I said, “You know you’ll be done for here right? If you are caught with it?”
“I know. I just- I don’t know what to do with it! How could I get rid of it?” Kirishima spouted now pacing in thought.
Hold on. “I’m not helping you dumbass,” I say clearly looking up at him again. I caught his gaze as he froze. I continued stalking closer, “I want nothing to do with this bullshit. I’m pissed at you. Lying about shit. Now this? You’re on your fucking own.” I poked his chest as I said the last sentence.
I turned away as there was an almost inaudible cracked voice that said, “wait…” I froze in place. There was a pregnant pause as I waited for him to say something, anything to get me to help him. Believe in him again. A small part of me wanted so badly to turn around. But I didn’t.
“Please don’t tell anyone.” Was all Kirishima said. It wasn’t the words I wanted to hear honestly. But it didn’t change my direction as I left his dorm. I went back into my room. I didn’t know it then but this was the beginning of the end with him. Where the distrust started.
I sat at the desk I knew well. I knew there was no way to go back in time but God did I need it now. The sun poured in from the window of class 3A’s main room. I swiped the desk with my gloves slowly, envisioning the time I spent sitting here.
I would look over my shoulder and see a toothy smile there but now it was a lone desk. It stood lifeless even though it held life itself. I sort of wanted to burn it now.
“Hey, Kacchan. Are you good?” I heard Deku’s voice call to me from the entrance of the classroom. I huffed in affirmation as I got up. I turned and saw Deku was putting on his suit jacket and grabbing his forsaken yellow school bag he had been sporting since we were kids.
We were walking down the hallway wordlessly for a bit until he said, “Still nothing, huh?”
I grimaced at the familiar question. He has been saying that for over a year now. “Hell no,” I grumbled back.
His freckled face dipped with a nod of sad understanding. He gripped the straps slightly tighter in deep thought. No doubt trying to comfort me. So I continued, “There isn’t anything on him anymore. Every Kirishima in this country doesn’t know who he is. Was he adopted or some shit? Because I can’t find his dad even according to Mina’s description. It’s like he just vanished.”
“Yeah. That’s so weird. Aizawa sensei still won’t budge on the subject either. I try to prod him occasionally but, nothing,” Midoriya mumbled almost to himself. The gears in his head were shifting.
I just shrugged. I didn’t want to think so much about the dickhead anyway. Kirishima dropped us like we weren’t shit to him. That thought made my chest feel constricting.
Unnatural red hair sporadically danced in the cold wind. Tan skin and tight grip. A hold filled with care. A flash. Breathe.
Careless laughter in the setting sun. Reassuring words after a long day. A brush of our knuckles hitting each other. Quiet looks. A flash. Breathe.
Seizing pain. Hospital bed. Fat tears clouding large ruby eyes. Rough skin touching soft skin. Comforting silence. A flash. Breathe.
A glimpse of red in a distressed crowd. Screams from passersby. Running into open arms. Tight and trembling embrace. Reciting names. Safe arms. A flash. Breathe!
“Breathe,” Midoriya said, holding my shoulders as I was on the ground shaking. My knees to my chest. My numb feet in the ground. His green eyes looked at me concerned as he said, “You had another panic attack. Maybe you should try to avoid talking about Kirishima. You tend to have more attacks when on the subject.”
I huffed in annoyance and desperation. I wanted it to all end. I wanted him to come back. “What if he’s dead?” I croaked. My eyes burned as I looked away from Deku. The words weighing my heart.
“No. Aizawa wouldn’t lead us on like that. If he were dead, we’d know. But we just have to hope he’s safe wherever he is,” Deku said affirmatively. I choked a sob and let out a nasty cough instead. He patted my back. “He wouldn’t leave us without reason. He wouldn’t ever ignore us willingly. We just got to have faith,” Deku continued almost like he was convincing himself.
I walked with him to my car. I knew he was trying to be nice but a small part of me wanted him to be dead and wanting instead of alive and ignoring. It would hurt more than his death to see him show me how much I meant nothing to him. When he meant everything to me. I closed my door as I mumbled something like a ‘thanks’ to Deku. His green curls bounced as he nodded. He smiled reassuringly. I felt like a dick for wanting Kirishima’s smile instead of his. I started my engine as I turned down the radio playing “Skin” by kurtains.