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Chapter Text

In Xuan Zhen Palace, Feng Xin dropped his weight onto the divan in Mu Qing's study. He'd come directly from the medical gods, bringing along the lemon they'd given him as a remedy. They expected him to eat it which was a torment in itself. He may as well get this other torment over with and ask his rival for help instead of stewing about the issue. It was going to be a hassle because Mu Qing was so damn petty, but the thing that might just outmatch that pettiness was his competence.

Mu Qing had only glanced at him upon entering unannounced. The deputies were much the same when he'd entered the grounds without an appointment. Whenever he passed one, they'd say General Xuan Zhen was in his study without even asking what his business was. He was only now realizing they were always like that when he passed through. He should mention the lack of security to Mu Qing later. Much later. Otherwise, when Mu Qing took offense to well-meaning advice, he'd make Feng Xin beg for his help out of spite.

Feng Xin tossed and caught the lemon several times as he grumbled about citrus and his rival. Mu Qing might make him beg anyway, the petty bastard. Unfortunately, he knew he could trust Mu Qing and his expertise. 

"You're too early," Mu Qing sniped from behind his desk which was piled with work. "Sparring isn't until later."

"I know." Feng Xin dug his fingers into the lemon's skin releasing a pleasant aroma that didn't match the awful taste. "I'm not here for that."

"Then?" 

"I have a problem."

"And?" Mu Qing's patience seemed ready to snap.

Feng Xin peeled the lemon, telling himself he was delaying just to annoy Mu Qing and not because he was anxious about his problem.

"You have no manners," his rival scoffed and gave the peels discarded on the divan a pointed look.

Feng Xin made a show of rolling his eyes as Mu Qing liked to do. Let him see how ridiculous it was. "Like you care about that."

"I'm working on reports and you're delaying me to watch you play with fruit."

Feng Xin shrugged and started to eat it. He wasn't a fan of lemons. 

"Feng Xin!"

He grunted, his eyes tearing from the sourness. "What?"

"Since when did you like lemons?" Then Mu Qing huffed as if he realized the actual problem. "Who the hell eats one raw?"

"Ugh, gross." He scrunched his face. "Fucking sour too."

"Feng Xin!"

Finally, voice raspy from the fruit, Feng Xin admitted, "Medical gods say I have scurvy."

Mu Qing stared at him wide-eyed and he put down his ink brush. 

When he received no response, Feng Xin elaborated to fill the silence, "I went in because these stupid wounds keep reopening and it's been fucking months. They said it's scurvy and said to eat lemons. Gave me this one and then the assholes kicked me out." 

They didn't like all his swearing when demanding an explanation. He didn't know shit about healing, but that didn't sound right even to him. So he had to come here. To him . For this.

Mu Qing gaped at him. "No?"

"No? Is that a question?" It sounded like a question. What the hell was he going to do if—"What the fuck do you mean no?"

"What?" Mu Qing shook his head. "But how? That doesn't—Wait. Months? You waited months ?"

Feng Xin shoved more sour slices into his mouth to choke them down faster. And maybe to avoid answering that last question. He nearly did choke when all that sour liquid hit his throat. Forget the wounds, General Nan Yang was going to die from eating these awful things.

Mu Qing finally snapped out of his stupor. "Stop eating the stupid fucking lemon!" 

"They said I have to." He wasn't eating it for fun!

"It's nearly impossible to get scurvy as a god, Feng Xin! Not even you should be able to come down with it. You don't even have to eat food!"

"So I don't have to eat it?"

Mu Qing huffed and seemed to gather his patience. "Let me see."

Feng Xin held out his wrist as Mu Qing sat beside him. He played with the peels as he felt the flow of Mu Qing's cool spiritual power passing through him, checking his meridians. The wounds pulsed with a fresh wave of searing pain. Only centuries of dealing with injuries had him remaining still despite it. 

"Hmm," Mu Qing said. "Strange."

"So it is scurvy?"

"No, you idiot!"

"Then what the fuck is it?"

Instead of answering, because nothing was ever easy with Mu Qing, he asked, "You said you've had wounds reopen for months?"

Feng Xin held in his temper and reminded himself that Mu Qing was doing him a favor. "Want to see them?"

"I want to go back to finishing my reports," Mu Qing grumbled, but Feng Xin knew it was all bluster, "but that's clearly not happening until I do."

Feng Xin opened his robes and pulled his arms free, letting the layers pool in a mess at his waist. Mu Qing took over removing bandages. Blood already seeped through them in several places. Mu Qing inspected the slashes across his chest, tracing the wounds without touching them. Then he made a soft hmm with the graze on his hip. It was shallow and should have healed almost immediately. Fresh blood beaded from it. 

He moved on to his bicep and prodded around the deep gouges from the demon's claws. They seeped blood. His forearm was much the same with matching punctures. 

Mu Qing made another soft noise. "These aren't older wounds that started to reopen like with scurvy. These are fresh."

"Yeah, I got them fighting a demon I've never seen before. They'd start to heal up and then reopen as if it just happened even if I haven't done anything to open them. Hurts like a bitch too after they've closed some."

"All your old wounds remain closed too so it can't be scurvy." Mu Qing sat back, away from Feng Xin's personal space. "Did they even check your meridians or look at these wounds themselves?"

Feng Xin shrugged. "One of the deputies said my meridians are fine and they changed the dressings." 

"The signs are faint, but your meridians aren't exactly fine. And if they had bothered to do their jobs they'd recognize the matching signs in the wounds."

"Is it a curse? Poison? Infection?"

Mu Qing retrieved fresh bandages from a chest against the far wall. "I'll need to do research to figure it out, but tell me about when they reopen."

As his rival redressed his wounds, Feng Xin described all the problems he'd been having and answered a million seemingly redundant questions about the details. Despite their intermittent bickering, Mu Qing continued his thorough interrogation, never once dismissing his symptoms or cutting him off. 

Perhaps it was the familiarity of bickering, or the confident hands tending to him, but the knot that had been forming in his stomach for months eased some. It couldn't be the soft cherry blossom scent that surrounded his rival, or the warmth of his body pressed close in his minstrations. Mu Qing was his f-f-friend. Abstinent. He'd never even—Mu Qing would help. That's all he'd let himself think about.

Mu Qing's voice was firm when he asked, "So you're saying that any time you use your spiritual power these wounds revert as if the injury just happened?"

Feng Xin frowned. He hadn't realized all the weirdness of when they reopened had a common factor. "Now that you say it like that, yes, it seems like it."

"Well," Mu Qing sighed with a small, genuine frown, "you'll need to stop using your power."

Feng Xin scowled. "I can't just not use spiritual power. How the fuck will—" 

"For now, while I do research. But if they are healing while not using power, it is likely once they are healed they won't reopen. It probably just needs to fade from your system."

"How long will it take for you to figure it out?"

"Give me a detailed description of the demon, and a copy of your mission report, then I should know more soon. A week at the most, assuming there are records to be found in heaven."

"If there aren't records of it in heaven?" Feng Xin pressed.

"Then we look for records in other realms and perform some tests. There are plenty of options and places to find information so don't worry about it. While you wait, you can't use your powers though. I'll need to see the healing rate."

Feng Xin grumbled again. "Fine."

"And meet back here tonight. I want to take you somewhere that might help."

Even when he didn't have answers yet, Mu Qing was working to help, and that was more reassuring than anything the medical gods had said to Feng Xin.

♥.:➶:. 【♥】 .:➴:.♥

The place Mu Qing wanted to take him was a small, remote mountain, where a pond lay hidden deep within its forest. Mu Qing had helped him descend, something they only did for each other when injured, and led him deeper into the dense woods. He hadn't thought himself to be injured until that moment. Usually, these wounds would be almost nothing —a nuisance pain to be dealt with later. But now they were effectively limiting his godly powers.

Feng Xin held the lantern ahead of him, making out the signs of the pond being nearby. There seemed to be a faint light coming from the top of the narrow path. Much of it was obscured by thick trees.

Mu Qing carried his own lantern low to the ground, giving Feng Xin a better view of stray branches and other obstacles in the darkness. It would be much easier if only he could have used his spiritual power to enhance his vision

The air had a damp clean scent to it as they approached. The plants all seemed greener, more lush, than they had a right to be this late in the season. Feng Xin had to shuffle awkwardly between two trees that Mu Qing passed easily. 

He could finally take in the beauty of the water and thriving plants. The water was surrounded on all sides by thick clusters of mature trees and only a small surrounding bank of plush grass and red flowers heavily perfumed the air. It should have felt cavernous with stark shadows, but the water illuminated things with a cozy and warm feeling. Perhaps it was the spiritual power making it feel inviting instead of foreboding. 

If Mu Qing hadn't vouched for the pond, he'd have assumed it was a trick. It was too welcoming. Too pretty. Like Mu Qing. He'd learned the hard way that pretty could still kick your ass.   

"Step carefully," Mu Qing said, his silhouette lit by the mysterious glowing pond.

"I am," Feng Xin grumbled. "We couldn't come during the day when we could see all these roots?"

"No," Mu Qing said, placing his lantern on the narrow bank. "Something about the direct sunlight causes the healing properties to become dormant."

"Then shouldn't we come on a new moon?"

"No," Mu Qing said again. "Too little light seems to have the same effect. Around the full moon seems to be best. You can tell because the water luminescence is more vibrant. It dulls closer to the new moon and the healing is not as powerful."

Feng Xin mostly listened to his voice and not his words as he took in the glowing water. Shades of blue and purple swirled in with some vibrant greens and yellows. They shifted as if there was a current despite the water being still. It didn't take a genius to see the pond had some magical properties. And it didn't take a god to feel the spiritual power infusing even the air around them. He could practically inhale power and had to stop himself from testing it out. Mu Qing would throw a whole ass fit if he reopened his wounds right now.

Mu Qing lit a couple more lanterns already on the bank waiting for them and then incense also waiting for them. "You'll need to soak for a couple of incense time at least." 

Feng Xin removed his outer robe, careful with his injuries, but as he slid off his inner robes, he heard a choked noise from Mu Qing.

"What is it?" As he looked over, Mu Qing turned away with a swish of his ponytail. 

"Nothing." Mu Qing hurried into the water. 

"Aren't you going to undress?"

The answer was sharp. "No."

"No?"

"No."

Feng Xin hesitated. "Why?"

"Why do you want me to be naked so badly?" Mu Qing countered over his shoulder, but his cheeks flushed a pretty pink.

Feng Xin felt his own face flame. "I don't!"

"Good!" 

"Good."

Mu Qing huffed.

Feng Xin floundered. If Mu Qing wasn't going to undress then he wasn't either. He'd just get in like this, still wearing pants. And his boots.

He wasn't sure why the other martial god still wore his fancy robes, and normally he'd undress because that made the most sense, then mercilessly tease Mu Qing about it. But it all felt awkward instead now. He didn't want to be naked in front of a Mu Qing who was somehow looking proper while wading into a pond fully dressed. 

Feng Xin shuffled into the water a step and nearly slipped on the smooth rocks. He groaned as he flailed his arms wide to catch his balance. They pulled on several wounds. He swore loudly.

"Quiet down." Mu Qing knelt by the bank and offered his hand. "I'll help you."

This would all have been easier with bare feet. His boots weren't made for slippery underwater rocks. Left with no choice, he accepted Mu Qing's hand and gripped him firmly. The other martial god was strong and reliable as he helped him into the water with a small smile tugging his lips. Feng Xin had wobbled more than he'd like to admit and not just because it was slippery. That stupid smile was distracting him.

"Why are you coming in with your bandages on?" Mu Qing asked once he was securely sitting in the water.

"Why are you still wearing your bracers?" Feng Xin countered. 

Mu Qing rolled his eyes. "I'm not trying to heal."

Feng Xin huffed because he had no good argument to snipe back despite knowing that sitting in water in his robes was stupid. Somehow that stupidity was contagious and Feng Xin was getting in wearing a good pair of boots. Being near Mu Qing always made him stupid. Before Xie Lian's third ascension, it was because Mu Qing made him so pissed he couldn't think straight. At least that's what he'd thought it was. Now that he wasn't angry anymore, and he was still stupid, he had to acknowledge the cause was a whole different reason.

"Here," Mu Qing said and began unraveling his arm bandage. 

Mu Qing's fingers were deft and efficient, but still Feng Xin couldn't help feeling the touches. It should have been like when the medical deputy changed his bandages, barely noticeable. Instead, he was feeling warm callouses dragging along his skin. Gentle pressure directed his movements. Solicitous palms held him steady.

In turn, warmth settled low in his belly and goosebumps formed down his arms with all this touching. He tried thinking of anything else, but nothing worked. Not even things that used to help, such as reminders why he should dislike, maybe even hate, this man. But they had long since resolved their real conflicts. Now it was just mild friction and banter. Nothing so small could distract him from the warm breath fanning his shoulder as Mu Qing reached behind Feng Xin to unravel his chest bandage. 

"What is this place?" Feng Xin grasped at the first thing he could think of to talk about.

"I told you, it's a pond with healing properties."

"Yeah," Feng Xin said. "Um, so the water heals."

"Yes."

"But only in the moonlight."

"Yes." Mu Qing checked his temperature and then his pupils. "Are you having a new symptom?"

"No, um, I just." He swallowed thickly watching Mu Qing's long hair swirl toward him in the water. He wanted to touch it. "The water, it's strange, no?"

"Mm," Mu Qing agreed.

He really needed Mu Qing to talk more than that if he was going to repeatedly wrap those strong arms around Feng Xin. Maybe it was good that Mu Qing left his robes on after all. Feng Xin's voice sounded an octave too high when he asked, "How did you find this place?"

"I found it after Tonglu. A ghost was killing people nearby," Mu Qing said. "After I dispersed the ghost, I explored the area because I could still sense something strange. This is what's left of some sort of ancient temple, much older than even us. Difficult to say what happened to it, but the power remains replenished by the moonlight."

"Was the ghost using it?" At least his voice sounded more normal.

"Just the old myths about magical water they'd stir up to lure in the desperate." 

"So you come here to heal?"

"Sometimes. Sometimes I come to meditate."

"Because it's powerful?"

"Mm," Mu Qing said. "And it's peaceful here under the moonlight."

Mu Qing had brought him where he liked to meditate in seclusion. This place was private to him. And he'd brought Feng Xin. 

"Thank you," he said as Mu Qing finished with the bandages.

Mu Qing nodded once and his face flushed. He turned away. "Let your wounds soak under the water."

Feng Xin sank lower until they were covered. Though the water was cool, immediately his injuries felt pleasantly warm and the pain lessened. It was working already.

【♥】

Chapter Text

A week later Mu Qing sat in Feng Xin's palace, biting back his smirk. Across from him a middle court official puffed up with self-importance as he explained the finer points about scurvy. Mu Qing was pretty sure he read some mortal text on it just before coming here to look down on Feng Xin's lack of personal care.

The medical deputy droned on and on with instructions about how many fruits to eat and other nonsense dietary requirements for Feng Xin. Mu Qing nearly burst out laughing twice.

The archer's brow was usually furrowed. He had a resting cranky buffoon face if Mu Qing ever saw one and it was unfortunate that it was the only one Mu Qing had ever felt attracted to. Right now that furrow was a deep set and his mouth pressed into a grim line. That mouth was the true indicator of how he felt and Mu Qing had studied it for centuries.

With every dismissive wave of the deputy's hand, that line drew down more.

Mu Qing understood. He really did. It was nonsense. They'd even brought him fruit because if his wounds weren't improving it was clearly because he hadn't followed instructions and not that their diagnosis was incorrect. And stupid.

It was only by chance that the deputy had arrived while he waited for Feng Xin. He'd given Mu Qing a dubious look and tried to persuade him to leave before Feng Xin entered. Mu Qing gave a smug smirk as Feng Xin sat beside him with a warm greeting, then turned and demanded what business the deputy had. 

This debacle was the best entertainment he'd had over tea in months. If Feng Xin flipped the table, maybe decades. He especially enjoyed it when his rival was pissed at someone who wasn't Mu Qing.

"Perhaps if I leave instructions with your cook."

"I understood," Feng Xin said.

Mu Qing retrieved an orange from the fruit basket as he watched the uncomfortable back and forth.

"I'm sure, but—" the deputy glanced at Mu Qing peeling the orange, "ah that's for General Nan Yang."

"Yes, I heard." Mu Qing ate a slice.

They looked annoyed but a middle court official wouldn't dare to scold General Xuan Zhen. They'd wait until later and complain loudly over too much wine for all to hear. "It's very important for his health that others not eat his medicinal nutrition."

As if Feng Xin would eat the orange. He disliked them more than lemons which was something that made almost as much sense as a god with scurvy. Mu Qing popped several more slices in his mouth, savoring the juicy citrus. 

The deputy's face turned red but he could do nothing except watch Mu Qing enjoy the fruit. They at least provided quality goods and it was delicious. 

"Tell me," Mu Qing said, his gaze narrowing on the deputy, "when was the last time a god was diagnosed with scurvy?"

"Well," the deputy dithered for a moment, and then said, "he is the first. As a martial god, it's likely that proper nutrition isn't—"

Mu Qing scoffed. "It's fortunate that your patients are difficult to kill."

"You—"

Mu Qing waved his hand dismissively. He wouldn't convince the medical gods they were wrong. "Go spout your nonsense elsewhere. Nan Yang and I have more important business to discuss."

"That—"

Feng Xin dismissed the deputy with a thanks that sounded like anything but appreciation.

Mu Qing couldn't resist his laughter as the deputy left in a huff. 

"Did you find answers?" Feng Xin asked, his brow still furrowed but his mouth was much more relaxed now. This was the face everyone mistook as angry, but wasn't. 

He sighed, the humor dying. "Good and bad news."

Feng Xin squared his shoulders. "Just tell me."

"We'll need to do a couple of brief tests to make sure, but I believe using your spiritual powers allows the affliction to siphon some energy and keep it going. So when you don't use power, your body heals slowly and will eventually eliminate the wounds that starve the affliction. Every time you use your power, it feeds it and that's why it's like the wounds are brand new. It can go on like that forever in theory, but try not to test that."

"But aren't my deputies here because of my power?"

Mu Qing knew that would be a priority for Feng Xin and researched the answers in advance. He even determined if things went wrong, he could temporarily absorb Nan Yang junior officials into the Xuan Zhen palace. It would siphon a large chunk of his spiritual power, but that would be resolved once Feng Xin recovered. He just hoped he never had to suggest such an outrageous thing. Feng Xin would do much more than flip a table.

Mu Qing settled on limiting his answer to what was currently relevant. His overthinking was his own issue and Feng Xin had enough of a problem right now. "Yes, but that's passive once they're here. It's not exactly flowing through your meridians the way using your bow or the telepathic matrix would. That's why you are healing, albeit slowly. Your godhood does what it can to keep you alive even if you're incapacitated."

"Good. That's good." Some of the tension in the archer's shoulders relaxed. Then he frowned. "Since it siphons power, that's why when I tried to heal the wounds with my powers I couldn't even slow the bleeding?" 

Mu Qing nodded and held in his chastisement that Feng Xin hadn't come to him when that happened. It was only Mu Qing's aberrant desire to be closer to Feng Xin that made him want to say something harsh. "Once we confirm it, they should heal on their own though. We can go to the pond again to speed it along, but there is only so much that can be done."

"You can't make them close since it's your power and not mine?"

"Unfortunately, no. It would still flow power through your meridians and the wounds and behave no differently than if it was your own power." He had no intention of feeding that damn affliction again and contributing to Feng Xin's wounds.

"Then how did the pond help?" Feng Xin rubbed the back of his neck.

"It's not pushing through your meridians for one and its healing method functions differently. Whatever created that pond didn't use power the same way we do." Mu Qing thought for a moment. "Think of it as more of a topical medicine rather than an ingested one."

"I see." His chin tilted in a way that suggested he didn't quite understand but didn't care to ask more questions about it. "So how long do you think it'll take? I have a stack of prayers that need to be addressed."

"I'll know more once I assess the wounds today. If they've made a lot of progress it might only be weeks, otherwise it could be months, maybe a year at most I'd think."

"A year?!"

"At most." Mu Qing stood. "Let's look at them so we'll know."

Feng Xin flushed a dark red. "Um, about that."

"Of course." Mu Qing rolled his eyes. "You couldn't wait even a week. You just had to use your power."

"I didn't do it on purpose! I just forgot!"

Another eyeroll was his response to that nonsense. "Show me."

With a brief glance at the archer's guilty face, Mu Qing scowled. "Feng Xin! When was it?"

"An hour ago." He rubbed the back of his neck again. "It's been centuries. I'm just used to doing things a certain way now."

"Well, maybe I can estimate based on how you did before that. When—"

"Yesterday." 

"What is the longest you went without using your power?"

"Two days."

Mu Qing flopped onto the divan in an undignified heap. "You're never going to get better at that rate."

"I'll be more careful. I'll have my deputies light the incense and things."

Mu Qing popped up at that ridiculous explanation. "Incense?! You restarted the affliction to light incense?!"

"I said it's a habit!"

"Your habit is going to have you perpetually injured." He never wanted to shake Feng Xin more than he did at that moment! How could Mu Qing love such an idiot?!

"I'll remember from now on."

Internally, Mu Qing stressed but he found himself saying coolly, "It's your godhood. Do as you please." 

He needed to return to his own palace and devise a plan. Feng Xin was a notoriously bad patient and could not be trusted to recover alone.

♥.:➶:. 【♥】 .:➴:.♥

Despite his insistence, Feng Xin didn't remember not to use his powers. In fact, he forgot quite often over a month. He had a solid six day streak where the wounds hadn't bled once and even showed signs of knitting together. Mu Qing estimated it would take two months.

At first that seemed easy enough. Mu Qing helped him with treatments and teas to speed up his recovery. They certainly helped with the associated pain. And it was nice having Mu Qing visit daily under friendly circumstances. 

Mu Qing's voice always softened into something gentle when caring for Feng Xin's wounds. He'd thought he was hearing things, his mind playing tricks on him because he'd wanted the affection. But then a deputy entered in a rush, and Mu Qing's head snapped up and his voice turned harsh as he reprimanded them for barging in. His voice really had been much softer and the contrast made Feng Xin jump.

Unfortunately, Feng Xin was his own undoing. In the middle of the night, he tripped over his armor strewn on the floor of his bed chamber. Swearing and stumbling over more unidentified debris, he lit a palm torch. Instantly he'd felt the wounds sear back to life and blood soak through his nightrobe. 

He'd ruined another five day streak of healing. It was officially minute one of day one. Again. Everything had been for nothing. All the prayers completed by his deputies and the Xuan Zhen Palace were a waste.

"FUCK!" He swore a litany of curses so loud that several deputies had come to check on him. Seeing his bloody robes, they went for healing supplies. One even asked if they should send for General Xuan Zhen.

He'd scoffed. Mu Qing would kill them if he'd disturbed him at this late hour. 

♥.:➶:. 【♥】 .:➴:.♥

When Mu Qing saw Feng Xin later that morning, his eyes nearly bulged out of his head. "You should have sent for me!" 

"They're fine! It was the middle of the night!"

"They couldn't have looked fine in the middle of the night if this is how they look in the day! You didn't even put a poultice on it!"

"I was just updating you not asking for your shitty attitude!" 

"My shitty attitude? MY shitty attitude?! I'm helping you!"

"I know that! I know! Okay?! I know! I know you're helping me and I KNOW I fucked up! I know!"

"Then stop!"

"I can't help it! I forget. I'm bored." No, not bored. Frustrated and furious! "This is harder than a heavenly tribulation. Everything I do has some component of spiritual power because we're fucking gods and fucking gods use fucking power." 

"The sooner you stop the sooner you can use your power again! Why don't you take this seriously?!"

"I am taking it seriously! Do you know what it's like? Can you do it? Can you? How about you try it! How long can you go without using the telepathic matrix to call for tea, or spiritual power to summon your zhanmadao? What about answering prayers? Can you just watch them pile up and everyone else take care of your responsibilities while you have to JUST SIT THERE?!" Feng Xin swore nonsense for a while and Mu Qing just let him. Somehow that was worse. Mu Qing wasn't telling him how wrong he was. 

"Did you know injuries have doubled in my palace? They're killing themselves to cover for me. It should be the other way around. I'm supposed to protect and train them."

"I'll take over more of the midlevel missions and have Ling Wen delegate more to other martial gods." Mu Qing sounded subdued. It was practically an apology from the petty man.

It didn't make Feng Xin feel better but much of the furious energy abandoned him. "I'm no good at being useless."

"Mm," Mu Qing agreed. "But you're almost nine hundred. You won't be defeated by something this small. I won't let it happen. "

"I don't see how," Feng Xin bit out.

"Maybe we should put a shackle on you then," Mu Qing grumped back.

Feng Xin paused. "Maybe we should."

"I wasn't serious," Mu Qing balked. "Besides, it'd prevent your godhood from healing you so the wounds might just kill you."

Feng Xin rubbed the back of his neck. "Maybe immortal binding cables?"

"No, that'd cause the same issues. Talismans and other power limiters would lower and not stop your power so those are also useless."

"I keep trying. I'm doing it a lot less now, but it only takes a moment to forget and start over again. The last week of using zero power was pointless since I'm at day one again. At this rate, I should just use my powers and deal with the wounds forever. I'm still a powerful god with them." That thought had been feeling a lot more viable lately. 

Mu Qing scoffed. "That's a stupid idea."

"I'm not kidding, Mu Qing. I don't know what to do here. It feels endless. I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin. I can't even train with my deputies without accidentally using my power."

Mu Qing gave it some thought. "Well, maybe there is one thing we haven't tried."

"Does it involve putting me in a coma?"

Mu Qing snorted. "Worse."

Feng Xin scowled.

"I'm going to babysit you."

"What the fuck? I'm not some kid!"

"If you say so," Mu Qing said. "You keep saying it's a habit and you forget. So let's move you out of your habits. A sort of vacation if you will. A different location. Different activities that you're not used to. A different routine."

"With you?" Feng Xin tried to keep his voice neutral.

"Yes."

"Okay."

"Okay?" Mu Qing blinked at him. "Just like that?" 

"What? I asked for an alternative and if this is the only option, it can't actually be worse." And if they killed each other in close quarters then it wouldn't matter anyway.

"Okay." Mu Qing looked dumbfounded. "Okay, good. I'll make arrangements and you'll be a guest at Xuan Zhen Palace."

"I'll need a couple of days to coordinate my deputies."

"No," Mu Qing said sharply, "let's do it today. They can come to have meetings in my study with you. Undoubtedly they will need your input throughout the months so it's best to establish the routine now." He gave him a sour look. "Tonight we'll go to the pond again. In fact, we'll go every other day. Maybe we can hurry along your healing enough that you recover this century."

♥.:➶:. 【♥】 .:➴:.♥

Feng Xin gave his head deputy another stack of sorted prayers and brief instructions. Several others, both Nan Yang and Xuan Zhen deputies, passed through the study he shared with Mu Qing to turn in their reports. After initial friction, both palaces quickly grew used to working beside each other though Nan Yang deputies still technically lived in the Nan Yang housing. 

His head deputy left to attend to his assignments leaving Feng Xin to continue working at his borrowed desk and really think about how nice Mu Qing was being, even when the petty god was being fussy about his care. Something about Mu Qing being outraged on his behalf instead of at him was endearing.

Feng Xin had even been caught staring a little too long at his pretty face while Mu Qing bitched about the latest delivery from a medical deputy. 

"You should be angrier about this than I am! It's your treatment they've screwed up," Mu Qing had scolded with a pouty mouth.

"Why should I care when I have you?" Feng Xin snapped his gaze away upon realizing what he had said. He'd been distracted by that damn mouth again! "To help I mean."

The silence had dragged on for a few pounding heartbeats too long. Instead of taking offense, Mu Qing's voice sounded an octave higher as he said, "I'm taking the lemons and oranges for myself."

Feng Xin sighed. But it wasn't one of his agitated ones. It felt soft and warm in his chest. He couldn't remember the last time he felt this comfortable with Mu Qing. Even sitting behind a desk wasn't that bad now. "You know, I really wasn't sure your idea would work, but it has been more than a week without incident."

"Should I thank you for your lack of confidence?" Mu Qing's sharp tone was perfunctory at best. "Why did you agree so easily if you didn't believe in it?"

"I'm trying to say you were right."

Mu Qing lifted his cute little nose like a haughty princess. "Of course I was right." 

"Yes, so you don't have to be a dick about it."

"Mm, but I want to be." Mu Qing gave him a smirk to show he was joking.

Feng Xin chuckled. "It's been a long time since we were close like this. Us working, eating, and training in the same place brings back a lot of good memories." And some not-so-good ones that he doesn't dwell on anymore. "Do you remember back in Xianle when we used to play Go?"

What they played back in Xianle wasn't exactly the current game of Go. Like many games throughout time, it had variations and sometimes those variations faded from existence. He hadn't heard traditional Xianle rules since maybe decades after the fall of their kingdom.

"You mean until you smashed the board? Yes, I remember."

Some memories faded with time, but others sprang back to life with a minor reminder from Mu Qing. Feng Xin shot back, "After you kept cheating!"

"We had agreed cheating was allowed!" 

That was mostly true. They'd had limited options sometimes and so they'd started making house rules to add an element of interest. "Yes, but only if you didn't get caught!"

"You didn't catch me though you just guessed and accused me of cheating every other turn!"

"That wasn't against the rules!" Feng Xin countered. Mu Qing knew how to distract from his quick hands with cutting words while they played which left Feng Xin to shout accusations any time he was suspicious.

Mu Qing rolled his eyes. "You're just mad that you kept losing."

"I won as much as I lost, and you rarely caught me when I cheated." He wasn't sure about that after such a long time but he'd never admit it to his rival.

"You didn't catch me though!"

"I did too!" Sometimes!

"You didn't, and I can prove it." Mu Qing stomped out of the room.

"Where are you going?" Feng Xin called after him but didn't get up to follow. 

"To get proof!" came the reply from down the hall. Shortly after Mu Qing returned and slapped a Go board on his low tea table. "Let's play."

"But our reports," Feng Xin said, belatedly remembering that a lot of those games ended in fist fights and he was at a disadvantage with his power restrictions. And they hadn't had a proper fistfight in a couple of years now that he thought about it.

"Are you afraid of losing?" Mu Qing taunted his accent turning thicker, reminiscent of Xianle. 

"Fuck you, let's play then." For some reason, Feng Xin's accent matched him. "I'll kick your ass just like old times." 

They played several matches, bickering, and throwing pieces at each other periodically. A funny thing happened and they even started using slang from their youth. Over a tea break, they reminisced about things they missed, things they hated, things that had changed beyond recognition. In the end, they didn't fight. They set a time for a rematch. After the rematch, they set a recurring schedule for playing games, which then turned into other hobbies, and even other leisure pursuits like festivals and plays. 

They established a new routine of visiting the pond together. Though Mu Qing still refused to undress, he at least wore only inner robes now. Feng Xin didn't ruin any more boots by being stupid and stripped down to his pants.

While he couldn't do substantial martial work, he contributed by sorting prayers and performing support tasks. Mu Qing even showed him some first-aid tricks. It was frustrating much of the time but the awful feeling of wanting to crawl out of his skin eased enough to ignore most days. 

And he had Mu Qing to thank for that. For all their bickering, his southwestern counterpart ensured Feng Xin and his deputies were comfortable and functional in a situation that would have any other god hosting him rightfully pissed or demanding compensation. 

The only things Mu Qing demanded of him were rematches whenever he lost too quickly at whatever games they played.

Unfortunately, after six weeks of General Nan Yang staying as a guest in Xuan Zhen Palace, their comfortable routine was disrupted.

【♥】

Chapter Text

Deep in the southeastern territory, Feng Xin led his deputies on a hunt with Mu Qing. It was a demon that had initially been assumed to be a ghost terrorizing a nearby village. Despite being in the mortal realm for hours, tracking signs of the demon, his southwestern counterpart wouldn't shut up with his protests and sarcastic remarks. Feng Xin wanted to strangle him.

Mu Qing grumbled. "I can't believe I agreed to this."

"You did. Stop complaining."

"Utter nonsense. Complete foolishness."

"It's my territory." And it was his deputy severely injured—possibly maimed permanently—by the demon they now hunted. He couldn't sit around Mu Qing's palace safe and bored while others risked their lives hunting in his domain. It was his responsibility.

"It won't be for long if you don't let your wounds heal!"

"I told you I'm not going to use my powers and I won't."

"You used them to light an incense! An incense!"

"That was one time and it was months ago!" Feng Xin huffed. "Besides they are almost completely healed now."

"That's why you shouldn't be hunting! You're close to recovered!"

"It'll be fine!"

Mu Qing made a frustrated noise that Feng Xin hadn't heard from him in centuries. Perhaps not since they were teenagers serving the crown prince. It sounded almost like a teenage girl's screech.

"If you use your powers, I'll kill you myself and take all your worshippers!"

Feng Xin opened his mouth to retort. 

"Um, Generals," a deputy interrupted cautiously.

"What?!" they demanded simultaneously. 

"The demon's here." The deputy pointed skyward.

No, not skyward. The large demonic beast stared down at them high in the trees above them. It grinned wickedly and then launched itself at them.

They scattered, clearing the way for the creature to drop to the ground. 

Feng Xin moved to use his bow. Mu Qing gripped his hand, stopping him. "Don't you fucking dare."

There was no time to reply as the creature swung claws at them, forcing them to separate in opposite directions as it swung wildly. 

Feng Xin was forced to watch as his deputies and Mu Qing danced in circles dodging teeth and claws. "Kill it already!"

Mu Qing swung his zhanmadao in wide arcs and his deputies stepped in its path several times making all parties pull away. It was a mess. He should have brought deputies used to fighting beside the saber wielder. Feng Xin gripped his bow several times and it took all his willpower not to use it. This was an archer's advantage. He should have brought archers but those deputies were busy with other missions. 

He almost used the telepathic matrix to call for reinforcements and had to stop himself from that too. 

"It's fine! Stay there!" Mu Qing shouted when a deputy nearly slashed his knee.

Feng Xin snapped commands at his deputies as the fight progressed, "Stop hindering him! Get out of his way. Son of a bitch, just get over here!"

The fight was too much for just his deputies, but it should have been simple enough for Mu Qing, if they would stop complicating everything. But they were in his territory. It was his responsibility and therefore his deputies should have been largely responsible. Only now did he see the mistake and pull them from the battle. 

The ones that had peeled off and returned to his side panted and nursed minor wounds.

"Shouldn't we—" one started.

"Quiet!" Feng Xin watched the battle closely, gripping his bow like a lifeline. A deputy was taking a beating while trying to disengage. He fought hard, and Mu Qing used every opening to maneuver the demon with quick slashes of his blade. 

Finally, an opening presented itself and Mu Qing moved to behead the creature.

But his deputy also tried to use the opening to escape. The two collided. The deputy bounced off the god and hit the ground with a thud. Mu Qing fared better, keeping his footing but it still foiled his chance to attack.

The demon used this reversal of fortune to swipe at Mu Qing's vulnerable throat. He'd never get his sword up to block in time.

Before he knew what had happened, two light arrows pierced the demon's skull, one directly in the eye. It dropped dead on Mu Qing, knocking him to the ground.

"What the fuck!" Mu Qing shouted.

"Fuck!" Feng Xin shouted back, running to his side and only vaguely registering pain from those damn wounds. Shit, shit, shit , his brain supplied in a panic. He'd killed it before it hit Mu Qing, right? He was pretty sure, but what if he was too late? "Shit!" 

Feng Xin's knees skidded in the dirt as he reached Mu Qing. He helped him push the demon's corpse off. "Are you hurt?"

Seeing Mu Qing bleeding, but whole, gave him a profound sense of relief, but it was short-lived with a few words from Mu Qing's sharp tongue.

"It's nothing compared to what I'm going to do to you, you fucking moron! What the fuck, Feng Xin!"

"What the fuck do you mean what the fuck?! It was going to cut you in half!"

"Hardly." Mu Qing scoffed. "I'm not one of your deputies."

"I just fucking saved you! You don't have to say thank you but at least don't be a dick about it!"

"You just fucking restarted your affliction! Forget saving me! Get fucking better!"

"The hell I'll forget saving you! What the fuck!"

They shouted nonsense and swore at each other at length, both sitting on the ground in blood and dirt.

"Um, Generals," the same deputy interrupted politely.

"What?!" they both snapped.

"Perhaps we should ascend and have your wounds treated?"

"Fucking hell. Yes, right." He glanced at the corpse and then took stock of his deputies and their wounds. He gave several curt orders for the clean up and report duties. 

"Let's go, Feng Xin. Your deputies know how this works already."

"Shut up!"

"You're the one—"

"We'll be sure to be thorough with our tasks, Generals." The deputy bowed politely. 

Feng Xin and Mu Qing looked away and nodded. Mu Qing drew a distance-shortening array, presumably to the pond. 

♥.:➶:. 【♥】 .:➴:.♥

At the pond, they continued their argument and the familiar routine of entering the healing waters. Mu Qing wanted to beat Feng Xin senseless as he watched the blood stains spread across the archer's robes. All that time and effort they spent on his recovery and it was all wasted because Feng Xin didn't trust him to kill one stupid demon. 

Feng Xin gripped Mu Qing's arm, halting him from entering the pond fully clothed. "Stop being stupid."

"You're stupid!" He flushed at his own stupid comeback. They were both stupid. He knew that.

"You're hurt this time so you have to take all this shit off." Feng Xin roughly yanked off Mu Qing's belt and started on the tie to his outer robe.

Mu Qing stood dumbfounded for a moment too long. Then he shoved Feng Xin's hands away. "I'll do it!"

"Fine!" Feng Xin moved on to yanking at his own clothes. "How injured are you?"

"Not as bad as you!"

They bickered several more rounds as they undressed and waded into the pond wearing only their pants. Between rough verbal jabs, they carefully cleaned each other's wounds. Mu Qing only suffered deep slashes down his chest and the usual bumps and bruises already fading after a fight. As a martial god, these were nothing. He was fine. Feng Xin had overreacted and Mu Qing couldn't figure out why. No matter how he turned over the situation in his head a suitable answer didn't magically appear. 

Finally, the question Mu Qing had been choking back couldn't be held in any longer. "Why did you do it? You were so close. You could have been free from the demon's affliction and back to your own life in days at most."

"Well, I didn't exactly have time to think about it," Feng Xin grumbled.

"I see. So it was just you being stupidly impulsive." A wave of disappointment roiled deep in his chest.

Feng Xin huffed. "No."

"Then what?"

"Mu Qing," he started and then sighed. "Listen, I don't speak well. Let me just say it plainly. I got scared you would be hurt like my deputy and I just reacted. I don't want you to get hurt."

He couldn't hide the sharpness of his voice. "I understand." 

Feng Xin grumbled something and then said, "You don't." 

Mu Qing seethed at that. How dare Feng Xin tell him he didn't understand what was shoved in his face for centuries! "You said years ago you weren't looking down on me. That was a lie then."

"Son of a bitch! No! I'm not! That's not it!"

"Then what?! What is it that you won't just tell me!"

"I—" 

"I'm a martial god! I don't have injuries! I'm just as good as you! I'm better right now since I can use spiritual power! Why would you step in to take the kill?!"

"I wasn't taking the kill!"

"You did!"

"Mu Qing! I don't care about the fucking demon! I just didn't—"

"What?! Stop teasing an answer and then taking it back! What is it? Just tell me! I can handle it, you big idiot!"

"I fucking love you!" Feng Xin's chest heaved. "I fucking love you and I didn't want you to get hurt. I got scared, okay?! There! Are you happy?! I fucking love you."

Mu Qing couldn't believe his ears and was stunned mute. 

Feng Xin loved him too! His first impulse was to flee. He didn't know why, but he wanted to escape. It was too much. Too much feeling. Too much relief. Too much excitement. There would be expectations. What did Mu Qing know about loving someone? All he'd ever done was pine after Feng Xin! Why was he even thinking about that right now? He needed to flee.

He swung around, splashing water in his wake, and moved to escape the pond. He made the mistake of making eye contact with Feng Xin. The look of panic that surely mirrored Mu Qing's own face stopped him in his tracks. 

Feng Xin was overwhelmed too. Mu Qing couldn't just run away and leave him like that. But he didn't know what to do or say.

Feng Xin let out a gruff noise and his expression grew weary like after a long hunt. "I can see you doing that weird concubine thinking. Just stop it. You don't have to do or say anything. Just don't worry about it if it's bothersome."

"It's not bothersome!" Mu Qing flushed. "I mean—" He meant what?! He didn't know what to say! Impulsively, he kissed Feng Xin, smashing their lips together with zero grace. He could be embarrassed about it later. "Okay."

Feng Xin's face blushed a deep scarlet. "Okay?"

Mu Qing nodded and did his best to fight his impulse to run away or say something cutting. "I'll be careful. But you should be careful too."

"Okay. Careful. Yeah." Feng Xin touched his mouth. "So kissing is a thing we can do?"

"Yes, but not right now." Mu Qing turned away. "I'm still mad about the affliction you restarted."

Feng Xin made an irritated noise. "Then you shouldn't let a demon maul you next time."

Mu Qing splashed water at Feng Xin. "I didn't, idiot!"

"Asshole!" He splashed back.

They swore and argued through a water fight, but in the end, they didn't storm off in opposite directions. This time, they kissed softly and then settled in the water beside each other.

"I thought you were going to run away and I'd lose even our friendship," Feng Xin said softly. 

"You wouldn't lose that even if I did run away." He always returned to Feng Xin. He couldn't help himself.

"So you like me too," Feng Xin said shamelessly. 

He opened his mouth to say something insulting because it all felt too vulnerable. Instead what came out was a squeaky, "Yes."

Under the luminescent water, Feng Xin took his hand and laced their fingers together. "You look like you're going to pass out from all these f-f-feelings so I won't do anything tonight. But tomorrow I'm going to teach you how to kiss."

Mu Qing's face flamed and he squeezed Feng Xin's hand. "You weren't any better." 

Feng Xin's laugh was deep and warm. "Yeah, I was surprised that you weren't headbutting me. We'll both do it better tomorrow."

Mu Qing nodded his agreement but he didn't trust himself to speak. He'd demand Feng Xin teach him immediately if he did. That would be too embarrassing. 

They soaked much longer than needed in the cool waters with their hands intertwined and bodies finally relaxing with each other. When they were finished, Mu Qing helped Feng Xin ascend and return to the Xuan Zhen Palace where they resumed their companionable evening routine. 

It took two more tries and a lot of arguing, but Feng Xin's wounds eventually healed. After such a prolonged period in the same palace, they were used to living and working together. On the surface, it may have seemed like little had changed with only a few extra looks and friendly touches. It should have been simple to extricate their palaces. Neither southern god brought up the topic between them however. 

If an outsider asked, they were told it would be an unnecessary hassle for Feng Xin to move out. Other court officials could do little more than guess at the meaning of that explanation.

【♥】