Archive of Our Own ^beta

The dorm was unusually quiet that evening. Seungmin sat alone in his room, the soft glow of his laptop illuminating his face. His solo song, "As We Are," had been released just a few hours ago, and the notifications on his phone and laptop had been relentless. Fans were pouring their hearts out across every platform, sharing how much the song resonated with them—how it felt like a warm embrace on a cold day.

Seungmin scrolled through the messages, his chest tightening with every heartfelt comment. Words like "Your voice feels like home," "You’re so important to us, Seungmin," and "I didn’t know I needed this song until now" filled his screen. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes, and he quickly wiped them away. He didn’t cry easily, even when he felt deeply moved. His usual composure was something he took pride in, but tonight felt different.

For so long, Seungmin had quietly carried the weight of insecurity. Despite his hard work and undeniable talent, he often felt overshadowed by the other members of Stray Kids. He had convinced himself that he was the least liked, the least impactful, the one fans could forget about. But tonight, reading these messages, it was as if a dam had broken inside him. All those buried feelings of inadequacy came rushing to the surface.

He closed his laptop and leaned back against the headboard of his bed, his vision blurred by tears. He wasn’t used to this kind of vulnerability, even with himself. The tears came silently at first, then in quiet, shaky breaths. His chest ached with the overwhelming mixture of gratitude and doubt—gratitude for the love he was receiving and doubt about whether he truly deserved it.

The door to his room creaked open, and Hyunjin peeked his head in. “Seungmin?” he called softly. He had been wandering the dorm, looking for his boyfriend, when he noticed the light under Seungmin’s door.

Seungmin quickly turned his head away, wiping at his face. “Yeah?” he replied, his voice unsteady.

Hyunjin stepped inside, closing the door behind him. His sharp eyes immediately took in the situation. He noticed Seungmin’s red-rimmed eyes, the way he tried to avoid looking directly at him. Concern flooded Hyunjin’s face as he moved closer. “Hey,” he said gently, sitting on the edge of the bed. “What’s going on? Why are you crying?”

Seungmin hesitated. He didn’t like showing this side of himself, even to Hyunjin. But something about the softness in Hyunjin’s voice, the genuine worry in his eyes, made him feel safe enough to speak. “It’s nothing,” Seungmin mumbled, but his voice cracked, betraying him.

Hyunjin’s brows furrowed. “Don’t do that,” he said softly. “Don’t say it’s nothing when it’s obviously something. Talk to me.”

Seungmin sighed, his hands trembling slightly as he clasped them together in his lap. “I was reading what fans were saying about the song,” he admitted. “They… they’re being so kind. Saying how much it means to them, how much I mean to them. And I just… I don’t know. It’s overwhelming.”

Hyunjin tilted his head, his gaze softening. “Why is that making you cry?”

Seungmin hesitated again, his voice dropping to barely above a whisper. “Because I didn’t think I mattered that much to them. I always thought I was the least liked. The one people could do without.”

Hyunjin’s heart broke at those words. He reached out, gently taking Seungmin’s hands in his own. “Seungmin, no,” he said firmly but tenderly. “That’s not true. Not even close.”

Seungmin finally looked up, his teary eyes meeting Hyunjin’s. “Then why do I feel like this?” he asked, his voice trembling with vulnerability.

Hyunjin shifted closer, pulling Seungmin into his arms without hesitation. Seungmin let himself relax into the embrace immediately, his cheek pressing softly against Hyunjin’s shoulder. There was something grounding about Hyunjin’s warmth, something that made Seungmin feel like he could let down his guard, even if only for a little while. Hyunjin ran his fingers through Seungmin’s hair, his other hand rubbing soothing circles on his back. “You feel like this because you’ve been holding all of this in for too long,” Hyunjin murmured. “But, Seungmin, you’re so loved. By Stays, by the members, by me. You’re so important to all of us.”

Seungmin’s shoulders shook as he let out a quiet sob. Hyunjin held him tighter, whispering soft reassurances into his ear. “You’re not the least anything,” Hyunjin continued. “You’re you, and that’s more than enough. Your voice, your presence, your heart—they mean so much to everyone who knows you.”

Seungmin clung to Hyunjin, his tears soaking into the fabric of Hyunjin’s shirt. For once, he didn’t feel the need to hold back. With Hyunjin, he felt safe enough to let the walls come down.

After a while, the tears subsided, leaving Seungmin feeling emotionally drained but lighter. Hyunjin pulled back slightly, just enough to cup Seungmin’s face in his hands. His thumbs gently brushed away the lingering tears. “You’re incredible, Seungmin,” he said, his voice filled with conviction. “And I love you so much. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”

Seungmin’s lips trembled, and he leaned into Hyunjin’s touch. “Thank you,” he whispered.

Hyunjin smiled softly. “Always.” He leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to Seungmin’s forehead, then his nose, and finally his lips. The kiss began as the softest brush of their lips, tentative and full of quiet emotion. Hyunjin lingered, his hand gently cradling Seungmin’s cheek as if he were holding something delicate and precious. Slowly, the kiss deepened, not in urgency, but in meaning—a steady, unspoken conversation between them. Hyunjin’s thumb traced light, soothing circles along Seungmin’s jawline, grounding him further.

Seungmin’s breath hitched slightly, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he leaned closer, letting himself fall into the warmth of Hyunjin’s embrace. The world around them faded, leaving only the soft rhythm of their shared breaths. Hyunjin poured every ounce of love and reassurance into that kiss, silently telling Seungmin, You are cherished. You are enough.

When they finally parted, Hyunjin stayed close, his forehead resting gently against Seungmin’s. His fingers lightly brushed through Seungmin’s hair, his touch tender and patient, as if he wanted to hold onto this moment for as long as possible. He smiled softly, his voice barely above a whisper, warm and soothing. “Can you feel it? Just how much you mean to me?”

Seungmin closed his eyes for a moment, his breathing steadying as Hyunjin’s presence washed over him like a calming tide.

“You’re not alone in this,” Hyunjin continued, his words slow and deliberate, each one infused with care. “Whenever you feel like this, come to me. No matter what, I’ll remind you how loved you are every single time.”

Seungmin nodded, his eyes glistening with gratitude. “I love you, Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin’s smile widened. “I love you too.”

The room was soft with the quiet hum of the night, the faint glow of Seungmin’s laptop casting a pale light over the two of them. Hyunjin held him close, his arms wrapped around Seungmin’s shoulders in a gentle but steady embrace. As they lay together on Seungmin’s bed, the world outside seemed distant, irrelevant. It was just them, their shared warmth, and the comfort of knowing that in this moment, they were exactly where they needed to be.

Hyunjin ran his fingers through Seungmin’s hair again, the steady, soothing motion like a lullaby. Each stroke seemed to calm Seungmin’s frayed nerves, his body slowly relaxing into the mattress beneath them. The rhythm of Hyunjin’s touch was soft and grounding, a quiet reminder that he was safe—safe with him, with the love they shared.

Seungmin turned his face slightly to look up at Hyunjin, his lips curling into the smallest of smiles. "I think… I think I’m starting to believe it," he whispered, his voice still a little rough but steadier than before.

Hyunjin’s heart swelled at the words. His thumb brushed gently across Seungmin’s cheek, wiping away any lingering tears. “You don’t have to rush it, love. Just let it sink in, one moment at a time,” Hyunjin murmured. “You’re surrounded by love, by people who cherish you—by me. And I’ll be here, always, reminding you how much you mean.”

Seungmin closed his eyes for a moment, letting Hyunjin’s words wash over him. He could feel the weight of the love, not just from the fans, but from Hyunjin, the one person who had been his steady anchor through everything. "I just don’t want to disappoint anyone," Seungmin admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

Hyunjin tilted Seungmin’s face gently toward him, his eyes full of warmth and understanding. “You could never disappoint anyone,” he said, his voice low and tender. “You’re doing your best every single day. That’s more than enough. More than anyone could ask for. And even when you’re unsure, I’ll always be here to remind you of that."

Seungmin’s heart fluttered in his chest, his emotions overwhelmed once again by the depth of Hyunjin’s love. “Thank you… for being here. For loving me like this. I’m so lucky,” he murmured, pressing his forehead to Hyunjin’s, their breaths mingling softly.

Hyunjin’s smile grew, his lips brushing against Seungmin’s as he pressed a delicate kiss to the tip of his nose. “No, I’m the lucky one,” he whispered, his fingers gently tracing the curve of Seungmin’s jaw. “You’re everything I could ever ask for, Seungmin. You’re so much more than you think.”

Seungmin felt a small, contented sigh escape him as he snuggled closer to Hyunjin, the steady rise and fall of his boyfriend’s chest lulling him into a sense of calm he hadn’t felt in a long time. “I’m so glad you’re here,” Seungmin murmured sleepily, his eyelids heavy as the exhaustion from the emotional rollercoaster of the night began to settle in.

Hyunjin pressed a soft kiss to Seungmin’s hair, his hand still gently rubbing circles on his back. “Always, Seungmin. I’ll always be here for you.”

The room fell silent again, save for the soft sounds of their breathing. Hyunjin’s words were like a quiet lullaby, each one sinking deeper into Seungmin’s heart, offering comfort and security. As time drifted by, Seungmin’s eyes fluttered closed, his mind finally at peace. He was no longer trapped in the turmoil of self-doubt; he was surrounded by love—by the love of his fans, his members, and most of all, by Hyunjin.

Hyunjin held him a little closer, the quiet intimacy of the moment wrapping them both in a cocoon of warmth. His fingers continued their gentle, rhythmic strokes through Seungmin’s hair, the act of care and tenderness speaking volumes more than words could ever express.

And as Seungmin drifted into sleep, his body fully relaxed for the first time that night, he allowed himself to believe, just for a moment, that he truly was enough. That he mattered. That he was loved. And he knew, deep in his heart, that with Hyunjin by his side, he would always have a safe place to return to.

The night passed by quietly, filled with the unspoken promises of love, as the two of them rested togethe.