Chapter Text
“That’ll be 85, kid.”
Keith gulped, opening his wallet with fumbling hands. The taxi driver tapped impatiently on the steering wheel. Keith pulled out his card and went through the motions. The last time he checked his account, he had 98 credits. Once he added a tip, this trip would drain his bank account. Keith chewed his bottom lip and prayed the transaction would go through. It wouldn’t be the first time he swore he had enough only for the card to decline. The driver was old and angry-looking - Keith didn’t like the idea of offering to pay him… some other way. Wouldn’t be the first time for that either.
But a green check mark appeared above his transaction and Keith exhaled sharply - thanking the driver and shuffling out of the car. Keith knew 13 credits was a bad tip for driving all the way out to the sticks, but it couldn’t be helped.
The taxi sped away the moment Keith closed the door - dust spiraling up around him and floating away.
I better get this job. Keith thought nervously, watching the taxi speed away. No way that guy comes to pick me up after a 13 credit tip.
Keith looked up at the large sign he was dropped off next to; a wide archway which read “Marmora Farms” in bold letters. A dirt road stretched between the arch and out through rolling fields. In the distance, Keith could just make out the outline of a large farmhouse. Keith sighed, adjusted his backpack on his shoulders, and took a step through the archway and on towards his destination.
Several cars passed him on his way down the long, winding road. Other interviewees, he assumed. The advertisement had read: Ranch Hands Needed - Open Hiring Event - no experience required. Modest salary - room and board included. Keith’s eyes had skimmed right over the pay and landed on “room and board”. He didn’t care how much they paid him as long as he wouldn’t be homeless. He’d looked up the ranch at the library before heading over. It was a small, family owned place. Where most farms had completely evolved into the modern age - robotics and high-tech machines taking the place of human hands - the Marmora Farms had boasted an all-human staff. Keith had run over the list of machines on the job posting and only a few were high-tech, so he felt confident in applying.
By the time Keith reached the house, he’d sweat through his shirt. He was on time, but so were the other ten or so guys there to interview, and they weren’t sweaty or dirty or red in the face. He could see all their cars parked in a line in front of the house. One of the men shot him a smug look as Keith joined them. They were talking amongst themselves - who they were, where they came from, whatever - and Keith felt very out of place. A quick scan confirmed he was the smallest guy there. Everyone else was tall and broad-shouldered. Keith knew he was strong, but he sure didn’t look like it, and suddenly Keith worried he’d be dismissed on the spot.
“Hey, I’m Shiro.” The big man to his right stuck out his hand with a friendly and casual smile. Keith looked at his broad palm for a moment, trepidatiously, before shaking it, hackles raised.
“Keith.” he said and looked away.
“Where were you before this, Keith?” Shiro continued despite Keith’s obvious disinterest.
“Lots of places.”
“Ever worked on a ranch before?
There it is.
Keith eyed the man suspiciously.
What’s this guy getting at?
“What about you?” Keith asked without answering.
“Oh, yeah, I’ve worked on plenty.” Shiro beamed - an obviously fake, egotistical smile. “I’m trying to work my way across the country. I just came from New Mexico - was in Colorado before that.”
“Good for you.” Keith grunted.
“Yup. Tryn’a put some miles on my soul.”
Keith rolled his eyes, not caring if Shiro saw.
“If I don’t get this job, I’ve got another interview lined up in the next county over.”
Keith bristled. How nice for you. Some of us actually need to survive - aren’t just some kind of labor tourist.
Keith didn't engage further with the fake boy scout and he didn’t have to. Another interviewee heard his comment about coming from Colorado and started asking Shiro questions about that so Keith could tune out.
This guy was obviously trying to feel out the competition - see what Keith knew how to do so he could be better.
Keith watched as Shiro moved effortlessly through the group - chatting up the interviewees and interviewees alike - getting everyone to like him so he could come out on top.
Keith wasn’t so stupid.
A big man stepped out of the house and everyone went silent. He stomped down the front porch steps and up to their group. A sharp scar went down his face over one eye. Keith gulped as the man met his eye - giving Keith a once over before returning his gaze to the group as a whole.
“Name’s Kolivan. I manage this ranch.” He gestured over his shoulder with one thumb. “This’s Antok.” Keith suddenly realized another person had followed him from the house. “He’ll be help’n me process you lot. So half of y’all follow him into the office to scan your id’s and the other half come with me to fill out some forms. Then we’ll switch. Drop your resumes on the front desk on your way in.”
The day was short, but hard. The ranch hands moved their group through several tasks that afternoon, and by the end, everyone was just as sweaty as Keith had been when he arrived. Keith was proud that of the group, he was the only one not doubled over and panting by the end of it. Well… one of two. Shiro was just as smiley as before and glowing with sweat under the high sun. He was unbearably hot and Keith hated him for it.
Kolivan and Antok brought them inside for lunch - a long table under a wide fan - and let the group have their pick of sandwiches, veggies, and fruit. Keith ate double his fill and discretely hid some extras in his backpack. If he didn’t get this job, he’d at least get a few extra meals out of it. When they were nearly finished, Kolivan came out with a clipboard. He scanned the room before reading something on the board.
“We only have room for two - as you know - and it’ll be Shirogane -” Kolivan gestured toward Shiro who beamed just as Keith’s stomach dropped. “ And uh…” Kolivan squinted at the paper. “Kogane.”
Keith nearly gasped.
“To everyone else, thank you for your time. Each of you will get cash for the work you did today, so see Antok on your way out, but please finish your lunch.”
Then Kolivan was gone.
Keith stared at his lap in shock. He did it. He wasn’t going to be homeless.
A firm slap on the back brought him out of his stupor, and he jolted to see Shiro smiling down at him.
“Glad to be working with you!”
Keith shrugged him off with a huff. “Sure you are.”
“You two -” Antok pointed at Keith and Shiro “- with me.” then walked out the door.
Keith was quick to follow, with Shiro right behind.
“We’ll get you started on paperwork Monday. For now, here’s your keys.” Antok spoke while walking them towards a small building.
Keith smiled as a small key was placed in his hand.
He couldn’t believe it. Finally he’d have his own space. No more looking over his shoulder or hiding his stuff.
“No girls in the house.” Antok said as he stepped up onto a creaky porch. “Go to theirs or rent a hotel. They can be here, but no sleepovers. Too many strangers robbing the main house at night and gett’n bit up by the dogs. No sleepovers.”
“Just girls?” Shiro asked, and Keith froze.
Antok stared at him a second before shrugging. “If you got close friends or family that wanna stay over, I suppose that’s fine, but you’re responsible for whatever they do. Kolivan is pretty strict about hookups, though, don’t bring any rando’s ‘round here.”
Shiro nodded and Keith chewed the inside of his cheek.
He couldn’t have meant…? There’s no way Shiro’s…?
“And here we are.” Antok pushed open the front door and led them into an open house.
Keith was excited for one moment before he saw the two beds - each on opposite sides of the room. They’d be sharing the space? It was spacious enough, but he’d been counting on having his own room.
“Hope you don’t mind the college arrangements.” Antok continued. “The cabin with two rooms burnt down last year and we haven’t had the funds to rebuild. Plenty of room here, though. And a private bathroom.”
Keith shook off the oncoming gloom. No, this would be good. Shiro might be a posing asshole, but this was Keith’s space too. He’d make it work.
Antok gave them a quick rundown of the farm’s layout - where they’d report first thing Monday and which phone numbers to call if they needed anything - and then Keith and Shiro were alone in their new home.
“Well, hate to dash, but I need to go back into the city for my stuff.” Shiro said, attaching his new house key to a keychain. “Left all my bags back at the hotel. I still have another night there, so I guess I’ll see you in the morning?”
Keith nodded and stepped further into the space.
“Do you need a ride somewhere or help moving in your stuff?” Shiro asked with a smile.
Keith dropped his backpack on a desk against the left wall. “Moved in.”
Shiro stared at the backpack then back at Keith before chuckling and turning to go. “Sounds good, then. Take whichever side of the room you want, roomie, see you tomorrow!”
The door closed and Keith shook his head. Shiro definitely thought Keith was some trashy hobo or something - not too far off, if he was being honest - but that didn’t matter. As far as anyone was concerned, they were on equal ground at this new job, and Keith wasn’t going to let some boyscout make him feel bad about his one backpack full of belongings.
Shiro arrived early the next morning. Keith had only just started brushing his teeth when heavy footsteps came from the front porch, followed by jingling keys and the bolt disengaging from the lock.
Keith shivered. Even after all these years, he still wasn’t used to a stranger having access to his space. It wasn’t like he had much privacy in the homes, but at least he knew what to expect. This guy was a complete mystery.
“Keith?” Shiro called the moment he stepped inside. “I’m back.”
Keith poked his head out of the bathroom and nodded.
“Oh good, you’re up.” Shiro pulled a heavy suitcase inside and into the walk-in closet on his side of the room. “I was worried I’d wake you. I have kitchen stuff that can bang around, so I was going to wait until you woke up to bring it in.”
How considerate. Keith thought, rolling his eyes.
Keith spit and rinsed his mouth, taking a big breath before stepping into the open area.
“I haven’t had a roommate since, uh, college, so you’ll have to let me know if I get on your nerves.”
Keith shrugged, suddenly hyper aware that Shiro was fully clothed and Keith was standing there in just his boxers.
“I’m not very -”
A knock at the door made Keith jump. Anxiety shot through his chest.
We don’t start until Monday, did I mishear Kolivan? Am I late? Am I fired?
But Shiro was answering the door so Keith didn’t have time to fully freak out.
Antok was outside.
“Food money.” He said, holding up two envelopes. “An advance so you guys don’t starve out here. In two weeks, you’ll get your first check - base pay - then every check after will have this amount on top of it for food and utilities. So you guys can get toilet paper and whatever else.”
While Shiro thanked Antok and started into some small talk, Keith visibly relaxed. He was almost giddy with the news. A food advance?! He was planning on living off his saved up granola bars and the food he’d stolen from their group lunch for the next two weeks. But now he could get groceries!
“You comin’?” Shiro asked and Keith realized Antok had left and Shiro had been talking to him.
“What?”
“I’m gonna head to the grocery store, you wanna come with? It’s a bit of a drive, doesn’t make sense to do it twice.”
“Oh -” Keith shook himself out of it. “Yeah, yeah I’ll go.”
While he wasn’t excited about being trapped in a confined space with a complete stranger, it was better than using almost all his food money just to pay for a taxi there and back. Who knows what Shiro would expect from him after doing this favor.
This isn’t like the home. Keith reminded himself as he got into the passenger seat of Shiro’s car. He can’t make me do anything. And if he tries something, I can tell Kolivan. It’s fine.
Two weeks and Shiro still hadn’t cracked. Keith kept waiting for the moment the facade would crumble and Shiro would reveal his true intentions, but it never came. Shiro was actually nice. Keith couldn’t believe it. He thought since they were rooming together Shiro would try to avoid him whenever possible, but Shiro actually sought him out. When they went to the grocery store, Shiro asked if they could line up their groceries so they could cook together and save money. At first, Keith only agreed because he wanted to save as much as possible, but then they were cooking dinner together every night and Keith actually looked forward to it. Since they mostly worked separately throughout the day, Shiro had plenty to talk about and Keith found that he loved listening to him. Keith still hadn’t told much about his own life, but he liked to hear about Shiro’s.
“Let’s play a game.” Shiro grunted, tossing another bail of hay into the truck bed.
“What kind of game?” Keith trudged behind.
“Twenty questions.” Shiro grunted and Keith rolled his eyes. “We each have to answer 20 questions - you can skip any question you like but that’ll only lead to more questions.”
Keith groaned. “Sure.”
“Great! What did you do before this?”
“Skip.”
“What? Already? That’s such an easy one, it’s not even invasive!”
“Ugh, fine. I did a lot of random stuff. Washed dishes, walked dogs, delivered sandwiches on a bike - which got stolen - washed cars, swept hair. A lot of nothing.”
“Dang, that’s a lot of jobs. And you’re twenty?”
“Twenty-two. And that’s two questions for you.”
“Damn. Your turn.”
Keith was so curious about Shiro he didn’t know where to start, but he also didn’t want the same questions turned back on him.
“What’s your favorite color?”
“Purple. You?”
“Red. And black.”
“Could’ve guessed that.” Shiro laughed.
They went back and forth like that for a while, learning things about each other, and Keith actually had fun. He found, much to his surprise, that he liked answering Shiro’s questions.
“First crush.” Shiro threw out - so casually - and Keith actually choked. “Sorry!” Shiro laughed. “Don’t die there, you can pass if you want. I’ll tell you mine.”
Keith sputtered some kind of incoherent excuse but Shiro answered his own question before Keith could string a sentence together.
“Aladdin.” Shiro said with a cheshire grin. “He was just so surly.”
Then Keith was laughing. It was so sudden and unserious that Keith didn’t even pause before answering himself. “Superman.”
“Superman?!” Shiro balked. “But he’s so basic!”
“Hey, I like a jawline, what can I say?” Keith shrugged. Then froze.
Did we just come out to each other?
Keith stared at the side of Shiro’s face while he worked - searching for some discomfort or hint of a grand revelation - but Shiro just laughed at Keith’s joke and went on hauling like they’d revealed their favorite condiment and not pieces of their sexualities.
“Yeah, nobody has a jawline like Superman, can’t argue there.” Shiro sighed.
You do. Keith didn’t say.
“So that’s all a man needs? A good jawline? ‘Cause that’s about all Superman has.”
“Hey, he’s nice.” Keith argued, definitely not defensive.
“Nice isn’t a personality, Keith.”
“He’s nice and brave and loyal!” Keith dropped the hay he was carrying and put his hands on his hips. “He only has eyes for Lois and takes care of his parents and isn’t an egotistical monster even though he has all the power in the world!”
Shiro smiled at Keith like the cat who caught the canary.
“If I would’ve known all it took to get you to talk was insult your childhood crushes I would’ve done this weeks ago.”
Keith rolled his eyes but couldn’t keep the smile off his face.
“And what does Aladdin have, huh?”
“Easy.” Shiro grinned. “He’s hot.”
Keith sputtered. “You’re making fun of me when you have shallow reasons too!”
“I never said my intentions were pure.” Shiro shrugged and grabbed Keith’s hay for him, tossing it into the back of the truck.
“You’re the worst.”
“My ex’s would agree with you.” Shiro laughed. “I’ve compared every man I’ve ever dated to Aladdin and none can ever measure up.”
Shiro sighed dramatically then gave Keith a questioning look. He mostly seemed relaxed but Keith could see a little trepidation in his eyes. Like he was waiting for Keith to confirm something.
“I’ve never dated anyone.” Keith shrugged and Shiro’s eyebrows rose slightly. “Guess I’ve been comparing them to my first crush too.”
Shiro smiled with a contemplative nod and they went back to work.
Shiro was quiet long enough that Keith thought the game was over.
“What’s your family like?” Shiro asked and Keith froze. It was only for a second, but Shiro noticed.
“Don’t have one.” Keith shrugged, trying for nonchalance.
“Oh - I’m sorry.” Shiro scratched the back of his head and Keith hated himself. “I guess… I don’t really have one either.” Shiro shrugged and Keith stared. “I never knew my parents since they died in a car wreck when I was one. I was raised by my grandparents but they died two years ago. Car accident if you can believe it.” Shiro huffed.
“Oh.” Keith didn’t know what to say. “I’m sorry.”
“No, no -” Shiro shrugged. “It happens. I guess what I’m trying to say is that you don’t have to feel weird or like you need to… I don’t know, hide or anything. I get it, I mean. Not having a family.”
Keith sighed and wiped his sweaty palms over his jeans. He was trying not to look at Shiro, but even so, he could sense that something had changed. Despite his best efforts, the words just came out.
“I grew up in different foster homes. My mom left when I was still a baby and my dad died in a fire when I was eight.”
“Shit.” Shiro chuffed.
“Yup.” Keith picked up another hay bale with a grunt. “Was almost adopted once - nice family. But the husband got cancer and died pretty suddenly. Took everyone by surprise.”
“Shit.” Shiro chuckled. “You and I have the same curse, then.”
Keith laughed. “Oh yeah? And what curse is that?”
“You’re gonna hate me when I say it.”
Keith rolled his eyes.
“No really, my friends back home got so mad at me whenever I said it.”
“Just say it, I’m used to your bad sense of humor.”
“Fine.” Shiro shook his head with a smile. “Everyone who loves us dies.”
Keith laughed hard, nearly dropping his hay.
“That is bad.” Keith scoffed. “Although, the evidence speaks for itself.”
And then things were different. Suddenly, Shiro wasn’t a stranger. All at once, Shiro was Keith’s best friend.
At the end of his shift, Keith passed by Kolivan’s office. This wasn’t out of the ordinary, Keith passed his office on his way out every day. What was out of the ordinary was that Kolivan called his name as he walked by.
“Sir?” Keith poked his head in.
“Kogane.” Kolivan sat forward at his desk. “Come, sit.”
Keith swallowed his nerves and did as Kolivan asked.
“So.” Kolivan said, expression unreadable. “You’ve been here almost three months. How are you liking the work?”
“It’s hard but I enjoy it, sir. I’m very happy here.” Keith squeezed his hands together, bracing for whatever news or accusation his boss was sure to level at him.
“No need to be nervous, son, I’m giving you a raise.” Kolivan slid a paper across the desk with a new salary at the bottom and a line for Keith to sign.
“What?” Keith stared at the number dumbly.
“You’re an excellent worker and I want to keep you around.” Kolivan sat back in his chair, stone-faced as ever. “You’re fully trained now so you should be earning what you’re worth.”
Keith quickly took the pen off Kolivan’s desk to sign before the contract suddenly evaporated in front of him.
“Thank you, sir.” Keith smiled and shook Kolivan’s hand.
“Another thing.” Kolivan put Keith’s contract in a box labeled “scan”. “I noticed your substantial appetite.”
Keith stared in confusion.
“The lunch buffet at our hiring event.” Kolivan spoke coolly with folded hands. Keith’s stomach dropped in shame. Kolivan had seen him steal extra food. His boss had watched him hide away food like packrat.
He thinks I’m going to steal from him.
Keith broke out in a cold sweat.
He thinks I’m trash.
“I once had an appetite like yours.” Kolivan said calmly. “My father kicked me out of the house when I was fourteen. Back then, there wasn’t much in the way of a system so I lived on the streets. I’d just started high school and luckily we were given free lunch there, so I developed a similar… appetite.”
Keith gaped at him in silence.
“I wanted to check in. Make sure you’re taken care of. I read your file. It’s hard being on your own.”
Keith nodded, at a complete loss for words.
“Good.” Kolivan nodded sharply and returned to his computer. “I won’t keep you any longer, I’m sure Shirogane is waiting for you outside.”
Keith choked on his response but Kolivan waved him away.
“My door is open if you ever need anything, son.”
As Keith left Kolivan’s office, emotion rose up in him that he had a hard time identifying.
Son.
The last time someone called him that, he’d ruffled Keith’s hair and went out the front door, promising to be home for dinner. But after school, when Keith got off the bus, there were policemen and a woman in a sharp pantsuit waiting for him. And then no one would call him son for another decade. He hadn’t realized it, but that word had meant home. Once he’d lost one, he’d lost the other.
Keith’s eyes welled with tears that he quickly blinked away, and sure enough - just as Kolivan said - when he stepped out onto the front porch, there was Shiro waiting for him.
“Burgers?” Shiro asked with a smile.
Keith nodded and returned the warm expression. Something shifted on Shiro’s face and he looked at Keith a little closer.
“Hey, you okay?”
“Yeah, yeah.” Keith waved him off. “I was thinking about how sad it is that you have to buy me dinner. You know, since you’re so bad at Mario Kart.”
“Hey, I had a cold.” Shiro poked him in the chest. “You may have won that battle, but I will win the war! Next week, we’re playing Smash! Then you gotta take me to dinner!”
Keith laughed and followed Shiro to his car.
“And I’m ordering steak!”
Keith shook his head and buckled himself into Shiro’s car, looking out over Marmora Farms.
Maybe this place can be home.
Keith had never had a best friend before, so he really struggled. Things that came easily for Shiro, like asking Keith how his day was, what he wanted to do over the weekend, if he wanted to play video games, were nearly impossible for Keith. In the homes, most of his interactions were fighting other kids to keep his things or getting in fights at school because his clothes had holes or he was dirty since their water had been shut off again. Needless to say, Keith was less-than socialized. Prickly at best, impossible to approach at worst. Compared to Shiro, Keith couldn’t help but feel inadequate. Shiro had made friends with everyone on the ranch already and had even gotten Kolivan to grunt - his version of laughing - while Keith was the stray cat who sort of hung around their group. He ate lunch with Shiro and the other guys but mostly just listened to their conversation while he quietly finished a sandwich. Shiro, on the other hand, always knew the perfect balance of listening to others and telling stories himself. While some guys’ stories came out braggy or self-congratulatory, Shiro’s were always charming. Maybe it was just his face. His eyes always seemed to be smiling. Keith found himself watching Shiro’s face more and more as time went on; studying his features, trying to figure out what it was about him that had everyone so enamored.
What confused him even more was the fact that Shiro seemed to be equally taken by Keith. Keith wasn’t delusional or self-effacing enough to convince himself Shiro didn’t really enjoy his company, Shiro was very obvious. Even in the beginning when Keith was actively trying to keep him at arm’s length, Shiro went out of his way to get to know him. Now even after getting to know Keith better and discovering his prickly personality, Shiro still wanted to spend nearly all his free time with him. Keith couldn’t figure it out.
It was late. Keith and Shiro were both awake - Keith at his desk and Shiro reading by the light of his bedside lamp. They had the next day off, so it seemed like they were both taking advantage of the ability to sleep in.
“Hey Keith.” Shiro said suddenly.
Keith hummed but didn’t look up from the sketchbook he was scribbling in.
“Do you wanna do something with me?”
Keith kept his head down in hopes of disguising his excitement.
“Like what?”
Shiro hopped out of bed and headed towards the front door, pulling on his boots.
“Come on, let's go.”
“What -? Shiro, where -?”
“Just put on your boots. Trust me!”
Turns out, trust me, meant hiking out into the fields in the pitch black. Keith had the smarts to grab a flashlight on his way out, otherwise they’d be tripping over who knows what. They’d walked across the property pretty easily, then taken a path through the fields and were reaching the edge of the Marmora land which bled into a small forest.
“This mystery activity -” Keith huffed, narrowly avoiding a fallen log. “- it isn’t murder in the woods, is it?”
“Ha!” Shiro slapped Keith on the back but didn’t answer.
“That… wasn’t an answer.”
“It’s just up here, don’t worry, I wouldn’t murder you in the woods, I’d murder you at a construction site.”
Keith laughed but moved a few paces out of Shiro’s reach.
Another fifteen minutes of silent hiking through dark woods and they came out into a clearing that steadily rose up into a small hill surrounded by trees.
“Here we are.” Shiro rubbed his hands together and started up the hill. “Come on, you gotta see this.”
Keith followed - confused when Shiro sat at the top of the hill and laid back in the grass. Shiro smiled when Keith shined the light in his face.
“Turn that off.” Shiro whispered with a wink.
Keith was nervous about losing his only source of light in the middle of nowhere, but he supposed he trusted Shiro enough to humor him. Keith’s eyes refused to adjust to the pitch darkness. He stared at the ground where Shiro’s charming face had been and only saw black. The trees rose up around in dark silhouettes. Just as Keith was about to cave and turn the flashlight on again, a sharp tug at his arm brought him tumbling towards the ground and into Shiro’s stomach.
“What the -?!” Keith yelped, scrambling against Shiro’s sweater.
“Jeeze, you’re heavy!” Shiro helped Keith sit in the grass at his side. “Knocked the air out’a me!”
“Well!!” Keith slapped his hands away. “Don’t yank me down when I can’t see shit!”
“Sorry, sorry -” Shiro said, laughing. “Just lay back and look up, you spaz.”
“I’m not a -” Keith started but a sharp gasp took the words right off his tongue.
Stars. Billions of them. The sky was so full of stars Keith was sure they’d start overflowing and tumbling down upon them.
“Wow.” Keith whispered, catching Shiro watching him out of the corner of his eye. When he looked back, Shiro ducked, staring at his lap and then back up at the stars with a cough.
Keith laid back against the grass to match Shiro’s posture. They didn’t speak for a long time, just watched the stars and listened to the crickets and occasional hoot of a lone owl. The sky was clear and the night was cool and comfortable.
“I just… I just wanna sleep out here.” Keith whispered, feeling his eyes grow heavy.
“Sleep. I’ll wake you up.” Shiro shrugged and Keith huffed.
“No you won’t, you can’t stay up to save your life.”
Shiro frowned but raised his eyebrows with a shrug. “I suppose you’re right. We should’ve brought sleeping bags out here.”
“Next time.” Keith smiled.
A long while later, after Keith’s yawning became too frequent to ignore, Shiro got up off the hill and stretched his back with a long sigh. Keith watched the back of his shirt rise up and he swallowed at the sight of the top of Shiro’s skin above his pants. When Shiro turned towards him and offered his hand, Keith was thankful for the darkness to hide his burning face. Shiro’s hand was warm and strong and Keith fought the urge to hang onto it after he’d been helped up.
During the long walk back to the house, Keith kept thinking about that hand. It wasn’t until they were each back in their beds - Shiro softly snoring on the other side of their room while Keith was still thinking about his strong hands, that sliver of skin, Shiro’s boyish smile - and Keith had a mortifying realization: I have a crush on Shiro.
. . . . .
Keith was at his desk when Shiro got home for the day. He slunk through the door with an exhausted sigh, kicking off his boots before dropping to the floor and starfishing out on his back with a grunt.
Keith snickered. “Long day?”
“Stalls.” Shiro sighed.
Keith hummed knowingly. They were both new and freshly hired, so they often got shit duty - literally.
“Not gonna shower?” Keith asked when Shiro gave no sign of life.
“In a minute.” Shiro huffed. “Just wanted to lay down for a sec but since I’m covered in shit, the couch or bed isn’t an option, so… floor.”
“Yeah, you smell terrible.”
“My heart…” Shiro dramatically placed one hand on his chest. “At least he’s honest.” He said to no one in particular.
Keith rolled his eyes and shut his book. It was alway impossible to concentrate when Shiro was around.
“Shower.” Keith said. “I’m sick of smelling you and we gotta start dinner.”
“Ugh.” Shiro pulled himself up. “Why are you always done before me?”
“I’m just better -” Keith started but then choked on his tongue when Shiro pulled his grimy shirt over his head and tossed it in his hamper. Keith could’ve sworn he was flexing. A thin sheen of sweat and grime covered Shiro’s chest and stomach. Keith’s eyes followed the dark happy trail down his belly and into his pants.
“See something you like?” Shiro asked with a playful wink, this time actually flexing his arms and chest.
Keith’s face erupted in shame at being caught. He ducked with a cough. “You’re gross. Go shower.”
“You sure?” Shiro turned to the side and flexed again.
This time, Keith laughed and threw a water bottle at him. “Shower!”
So yeah. Keith was struggling with his crush. It wasn’t like Keith was some blushing virgin. He’d long since figured out that men controlled his life and there was something Keith could offer them that would make life a little easier. Keith knew how to flip the switch - turn on the bedroom eyes, touch them here or there, use that specific tone of voice - and become a character that a man wanted to fuck. But with Shiro it was different. Keith was embarrassed. He cared what Shiro thought of him and the idea of putting on a mask made him feel sick. Shiro would be so disappointed if he knew what a slut Keith had been. Keith thought maybe Shiro would’ve been okay with it if it was something Keith wanted to do. If Keith really liked sex or really loved to flirt, but knowing he was a liar would surely be too much. Knowing Keith would use sex to get things would surely change the way Shiro saw him.
So the usual methods were out, leaving Keith back to square one. He’d never liked anyone before, so he didn’t have a playbook for this. At least he knew Shiro liked men which made things a little easier. Whether or not Keith had a chance was another story.
Keith - despite himself - wondered how he measured up to Aladdin.
. . . . .
“Keith. Pst, Keith.”
Keith didn’t realize he’d fallen asleep at his desk until Shiro’s hand on his shoulder and soft voice woke him up.
“Hmm -?” Keith sat up - still half asleep - but Shiro didn’t move his hand. He was kneeling beside Keith’s desk.
“You fell asleep.” Shiro smiled. Keith watched little droplets from his still wet hair as they moved slowly down his neck and towards his clavicle. “You with me?”
Keith nodded slowly and stared at Shiro’s mouth instead.
Shiro’s breath hitched and his hand moved to Keith’s neck instead.
“We were going to start dinner.” Shiro whispered.
Keith stared at him. “Oh.”
A wide smile stretched across Keith’s face, making him come back to himself a little.
“I’ll start it, okay?” Shiro squeezed the joint between Keith’s neck and shoulder. “You wake up some more then come join me, alright?”
Keith nodded slowly and smiled. Shiro’s eyebrows pinched for a moment before he got up, ruffled Keith’s hair, and went into the kitchen.
Keith wasn’t there when it happened.
He was on the far end of the west field when a call came in over the walkie-talkies: accident at the baler. Ambulance on the way.
Keith’s body turned to ice. Shiro’s running the baler today. And he ran.
By the time Keith made it back to the house, the ambulance had already come and gone, taking Shiro away.
“What happened?!” Keith burst into Kolivan’s office.
“Keith.” Kolivan turned calmly from the laptop on his desk. “There was an accident. Mr. Shirogane has been taken to the hospital. Any further details fall upon Mr. Shirogane to relay to you as they relate to his personal medical information -”
“That’s bullshit!” Keith spat, slamming his hands down on Kolivan’s desk.
Kolivan took a breath - staring at Keith like a bomb he needed to defuse.
“I am taking this incident very seriously. Nothing is more important to me than the safety of the people I am responsible for and that includes their privacy.”
Keith ground his teeth together and his vision blurred.
“I just -” Keith choked and looked away, breathing hard. “I need to know if he’s okay.”
Kolivan sighed. He watched Keith for a moment with a strange expression on his usually stoic face. He sighed and lifted a paper off his desk.
“When Shiro started here, he left the emergency contact form blank. I don’t have anyone to call.”
Keith wracked his brain. Shiro didn’t have anyone to call. Keith couldn’t recall ever being told about a distant relative or close friend, much less what their number might be. Shiro was alone.
“I can tell you which hospital he was taken to.” Kolivan said, passing Keith a piece of paper.
Keith wasn’t proud of stealing Shiro’s car, but that didn’t really matter.
Speeding down the highway, all he could do was go over the facts. There was an accident. Antok said the baler had fallen over. Shiro was taken away in an ambulance. Shiro was alone. Keith was on his way.
Just as Keith pulled into the hospital parking lot, he suddenly remembered something Shiro had said.
They were cursed.
Everyone who ever loved them had died.
Keith practically ran through the sliding doors to the front desk.
“Takashi Shirogane?” Keith asked, holding onto the desk for dear life.
The person at the front desk took one look at Keith’s haggard face and began typing on their computer.
“Your name?”
“Uh - Keith - I’m here to see Takashi -”
“Yes, I heard you, are you family?”
“Um.” Keith shifted uncomfortably. “Yes?”
The nurse raised an eyebrow at him and began typing again.
“Oh -” their face relaxed. “Keith Kogane?”
Keith started in surprise. “...yes?”
“You’re listed as Mr. Shirogane’s emergency contact on his health insurance.”
Keith had whiplash.
“He’s still in surgery. If you follow me, I can take you to the friends and family waiting area.”
Keith followed the nurse dumbly down an endless maze of hallways before entering another lobby-like area with tables and chairs and couches. There were other strangers in the room, waiting on various surgeries being done.
“I’ll give Rabby your name and info -” the nurse gestured towards another nurse sitting at the front desk. “- and she’ll update you on Mr. Shirogane’s progress. If you look at that TV there -” they pointed to a flat screen in the corner. “- Shirogane’s room number has the status beside it, so you can track his progress yourself.”
Keith nodded, dumbly, wringing his hands.
“Thanks.”
Keith paced for a while until the worried looks he was getting from the other people started getting to him. So he sat down and stared at the tv until his eyes burned.
After how fast everything had happened, sitting still felt like torture.
Keith agonized in that waiting room long after the sun had set. The only thing keeping him sane was the certainty that someone would’ve told him by now if Shiro had died.
“Mr. Kogane?” A voice from across the room jolted Keith out of a half-doze and up from his seat.
“Yes?” Keith rushed to meet a man in full medical gear.
“Good news.” The doctor smiled. “Takashi is out of surgery and in the recovery room right now.”
“He’s okay?”
“Yes, the surgery went as well as it possibly could’ve.”
Keith sank in relief - tears filling his eyes.
“However.” The doctor continued, tying Keith’s stomach in knots. “We were unable to save his arm.”
Keith’s heart dropped into his stomach. Too many thoughts spiraled around until it all became white noise.
“There will be significant scarring on his face as well. Of course, cosmetic surgery is always an option, but I’m letting you know now to minimize the shock before you go back to see him.”
Keith rubbed his eyes, suddenly so tired and sad.
“I can see him?” His voice was small and weak.
“Yes, unless you need a moment?”
“No, no I’m good. Let’s go now.”
The walk to Shiro’s room was the hardest thing Keith had ever done. His legs felt like jelly while his heart was nearly bursting from his chest. Every moment Keith had to fight the impulse to run. Run as fast as he could until he found the room himself.
And then they were there.
Keith didn’t know what to do. The doctor was talking, but Keith wasn’t listening. Shiro looked so small and hurt in that big, white bed. Keith could barely make out his closed eyes above the thick bandage running across his face completely covering his nose. And there at his right side, nothing. It hurt Keith’s brain to look at it. He followed Shiro’s face down the strong line of his neck to his shoulder and bicep and then… nothing.
Something rose up in Keith then. Something foreign and terrifying and completely unfamiliar, but so strong it might burst out of him at any moment.
I love him.
I love this man.
I love Shiro.
And I almost lost him.
And finally, Keith wept.