Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Youngmi stared at the ground, trying to cancel out the loud noises around her. She should be moving, she knew should be trying to find people to team up with for the next game, but her legs and voice don’t allow her to. 

She stayed completely still for a couple of minutes before a tall woman walked her way. The two locked eyes in silence, it felt like the world had stopped. Youngmi’s heart raced, the woman was so beautiful. She’d hoped she was going to ask her to team up, but to her dismay, the woman simply walked away and continued scanning the area. 

For some strange reason, Youngmi suddenly got the courage to speak up. Maybe it was desperation or fear that took over her, because she knew if she didn’t team up in the next eight remaining minutes, she’d be killed. Or maybe it was because the woman was absolutely stunning that she needed to talk to her. 

“Excuse me…” Youngmi softly said, slowly turning her body around to face the woman. “Would you like to team up with me?”

The woman simply stared down at her, she didn’t say a word. Youngmi’s heart felt like it was going to explode. What if she said no? She was a much smaller and weaker girl, she was practically useless in a survival game, no one would want her. 

The silence was killing her. Her body started to slightly tremble and her eyes began to tear up. She didn't want to die. At least not this soon. She wasn’t going to give up this easily. If she needed to get on her knees and beg, she was going to-

“Sure” the woman smiled. “Come on, let's go find more people.”

Youngmi let out a deep exhale, she felt like she could breathe again. She gave the woman a weak smile before following right behind her. 

Youngmi shakily stood up from the ground. It was her group’s turn to play the games. She couldn’t hide how much her body trembled, she was terrified. What if she couldn't play her game right, it would kill so much time and everyone in her team would die because of her. Tears started to form in her eyes once again. 

“Look at me.” The woman next to her said, breaking her train of thought. 

“I’m Hyunju. Cho Hyunju.” She properly introduced herself. It was something so simple yet so respectful. 

Hyunju could easily tell how nervous and scared the younger girl was, she was probably doing this to calm her down. 

“What’s your name?” She politely asked. 

“It’s Youngmi. Kim Youngmi.” She quietly replied. Her body still violently shaking. 

She suddenly felt the woman’s hand grab her own. They were strong and firm, but they held hers so gently. 

“Youngmi, when you spoke to me earlier, I could tell right away. I could tell how brave you are.” Hyunju explained. “So you’ve got to believe in yourself. Can you do that?”

“I’ll try.” She nodded, her voice slightly shaking. 

Hyunju gave her a soft smile which made the younger girl’s heart skip a beat. She quickly looked away to hide her blushing face. But she could still feel Hyunju’s eyes on her, her grip around her hands tightened. 

She can’t die. No, not after this woman just gave her so much confidence and courage. She can’t let her down, not when she had finally found a reason to keep going. 

They passed. With not a second to spare, but they passed.

Even if it was the most chaotic and stressful game she had ever played, she was alive and unharmed. Well, not everyone was. Seonnyeo did get a few hard slaps from Hyunju for messing up so many times and wasting time which she found a little amusing. Almost too amusing for her liking. 

Something about Hyunju taking charge and slapping that shaman woman was extremely impressive and attractive. She was so powerful and strong, and of course very beautiful. It was hard trying not to love her, but there was no place for that. She could die at any moment. But that still didn’t stop her heart from skipping a beat whenever the two girls made eye contact. 

“Can I ask you something?” Asked Youngmi. 

“Yes.” Hyunju replied softly while taking a seat next to the girl. 

“How did you know it’d be easier to flip the ddakji with the other side?” She asked. To be honest, she didn't care about some stupid paper game. She just wanted an excuse to talk to the older woman.

 So, she carefully listened. She watched her talk about her childhood and her old friends, she tried paying attention but her mind kept drifting elsewhere. It was hard not to stare, she looked too beautiful. Her hair was messily tied back yet it looked flawless. Her neck was exposed and drops of sweat were visible. The simple sight of it made Youngmi weak and flustered. This was bad . 

The group suddenly fell into silence, she figured she should probably speak up. “Ah, I see.”

“Listen, can I ask you something too?” Geumja asked. 

The old woman went on to ask about why Hyunju asked everyone around her to turn around when it was her turn to play the game. She was a bit curious too but didn't think it mattered that much since they passed because of that strange gesture. 

Hyunju visibly looked taken aback by the question, she appeared to be nervous and shy, which she found so adorable. When she explained that it was because she hadn’t had bottom surgery yet, Youngmi became a hot mess. For her to openly say that in such a casual manner was both shocking and admirable.

She didn’t mind Hyunju’s gender identity, she was more drawn to how strong and brave the woman was. 

“Oh- so that’s how you got those?” Geumja abruptly asked, pointing at Hyunju's chest.

 “Of course, I knew they were too big-” She continued on, but her son quickly shut her up.

While the mother and son bickered, Youngmi was a raging hot blushing mess. She tried her absolute hardest to hide her smile and red face. Thankfully, a loud buzzing alarm caught everyone’s attention. It was time to vote whether they wanted to stay or leave. 

Youngmi sat quietly at the bottom of the stairs. Her chest felt heavy, she was struggling to breathe and her vision was blurred. She felt sick, she couldn’t even take a bite of her sandwich because she knew she would immediately throw it up.

Majority of the players voted to stay, even Hyunju, the woman she thought she could trust and love. She felt betrayed. Even after all four of them agreed to have dinner together, both Hyunju and Yongsik decided that they had to continue playing the games. She felt slightly embarrassed that she had already started fantasizing about going out with Hyunju. Not with Geumja and Yongsik, just the two girls, alone. She began wondering what Hyunju would wear, would she wear a dress? Heels? How would she do her makeup? Where would she want to eat? She figured that a nice quiet intimate restaurant would suit her. But all her dreams and wonders were instantly shattered when Hyunju pressed the O button. 

“Hyunju, why did you do it?” Asked Geumja. “We said we were all going to get together at my house. Why did you change your mind?” 

Youngmi couldn’t help but feel bad for the old woman. They’ve gotten so close these past few days that she started seeing her like a second mother. She even comforted her when Youngmi made an absolute fool out of herself a few moments ago. 

As the votes came to an end and the blue side kept getting more and more players, Youngmi became more and more anxious. She wanted to go home so badly, she was getting desperate. She was never one to draw attention to herself, in fact, she absolutely hated getting attention. But even her severe social anxiety didn’t prevent her from violently sobbing and pleading everyone around her to vote red. She looked pathetic and insane. Thankfully, Geumja pulled her aside and slowly calmed her down before she caused more of a scene. She later thanked the old woman for the reassurance. 

Hyunju’s voice brought her back to reality. She mentioned how unaccepting people around her were, even her own parents. She had lost her family, friends, and even job which led her to being in huge debt. Her life was ruined all because of how society treated transgender people, none of that was her fault yet she received the most backlash. It made Youngmi feel incredibly guilty. She couldn’t be disappointed in Hyunju for choosing to stay, this could be the only opportunity for her to have a second chance in life. 

The woman went on about her dreams and goals, she wanted to travel to Thailand to finish her surgery and set down over there. She talked about how beautiful the women in Thailand were. Youngmi could hear a small crack in her voice, almost like she felt insecure about herself. It pained her knowing that Hyunju thought so little of herself just because she hadn’t finished her surgeries. 

“You’re beautiful too, unnie…” Youngmi whispered to herself, she didn't think anyone else would hear her but still turned bright red knowing that those words slipped off her tongue so easily. She was sure that no one noticed, but she swore she could feel Hyunju’s hard gaze on her back. 

It was late at night, around 3am, and Youngmi could not fall asleep. Her mind was racing with a million thoughts. The games, her family, her friends, her home, and of course, Hyunju. She felt like she was going insane. So, she shut her eyes once again, hoping to get some sleep tonight but the sound of a soft creak on the stairs caught her attention. Someone was walking towards her. Her pulse quickened, she didn’t dare to move or open her eyes. She felt the matter dip as they took a seat and leaned over her. A hand gently caressed her hair, it was so soft and tentative. 

“Hyunju…” she whispered, slowly opened her eyes and saw the woman softly smile. 

“Did I wake you?” She quietly asked.

Youngmi shook her head as she sat up. There was suddenly an awkward silence, neither girls dared to speak up. 

“I’m sorry.” Hyunju blurted out. 

Youngmi let out a weak laugh, “don’t be-”

“I’m so sorry…” her voice trembled, tears slowly slipping down her cheek. “When I pressed that button I immediately regretted it. And when I saw you cry, I knew I made a huge mistake.” She said in between sobs. 

All Youngmi could think of was how beautiful she looked at that moment. Hyunju only ever presented herself as a strong and composed woman. But now, seeing her with tear-streaked cheeks and puffy eyes, there was something captivating about her vulnerability. But why was she showing her this side of herself? Did she feel safe enough to let her guard down? Did she share the same feelings Youngmi felt? Or was she just reading too much into it?

Whatever the reason was didn't matter, she just wanted to comfort the beautiful woman in front of her. 

“Unnie, I promise that it’s okay,” Youngmi slowly reached her arm out and gently wiped away her tears. “Please don’t blame yourself.”

The woman seemed to finally register that she was crying, she quickly turned away and hid her face in her hands, “don’t look at me, I look hideous right now.” She said. 

Youngmi felt her heart ache, hearing such a gorgeous woman call herself hideous was extremely wrong. 

She grabbed Hyunju’s face and forcibly turned her back around. “Unnie, you’re so beautiful. I hate that you can’t see that…” She pulled the woman close, their faces were only inches apart. 

“Youngmi…” the woman whispered, she could feel her hot breath hit her skin. 

Her eyes moved down to Hyunju’s lips, they looked so soft and inviting. She gently rubbed her thumb against her bottom lip, while licking her own. Hyunju showed no signs of discomfort, instead she leaned into her touch ever so slightly, and that was when Youngmi wondered if the woman had ever been touched this way. Had anyone shown her any kind of affection or gentle touches?

Without a second thought, Youngmi pressed her lips onto the other woman’s. Hyunju immediately kissed back, she felt like melting. All the two could hear were their quiet soft moans and their lips meeting again and again. Youngmi suddenly felt her small frail body get lifted onto Hyunju’s lap, she immediately felt her erection poke her. The older woman’s hands began tugging and pulling the girl’s clothing off, desperate to touch her skin. 

Youngmi helped her, she yanked her teal jumpsuit off, leaving her completely naked. Her body was nothing special, her breasts were slightly smaller than average and had little to no fat on her ass, yet Hyunju couldn’t keep her hands off of the girl. She let her grope her breasts and thighs despite how embarrassed she felt. 

“You’re so soft…” Hyunju whispered, cupping her left breast and squeezing ever so lightly. 

A whine escaped the girl’s throat, the sound seemed to encourage Hyunju to cup the right breast too. She rolled her thumb across Youngmi’s nipple, the girl could not help but feel a whole new sensation blossoming between her legs. Youngmi couldn’t resist pressing herself down against the woman’s crotch, it caused Hyunju to let out a strained moan. 

“I’m sorry-” Youngmi quickly apologized, she didn’t know if Hyunju was comfortable using that part of her body. 

“No… it’s just… I don’t want you to see me as less of a woman…” Hyunju explained. 

Youngmi gave the woman a light kiss on her nose and smiled, “What you have down there doesn’t define who you are. If you say you’re a woman, then you’re a woman.” She replied calmly. 

Hyunju gave her a warm smile before placing her lips on the girl’s cheek. She gently pushed the girl down onto the mattress and attacked her mouth once again. Youngmi tried to undress the other girl, she struggled a bit which made Hyunju giggle. With Hyunju’s help, the older woman had taken her uniform off, even her bra. She was left with only a pair of pink small panties, they barely covered her crotch. Youngmi turned bright red at the sight of her, her eyes darted all over her body. But what caught most of her attention were her breasts. God, they’re so huge. She thought. 

Hyunju pressed her chest down against the younger girl’s, she could feel her breasts and nipples on her own, this made Youngmi go crazy. 

“This is too much…” Youngmi moaned in her ear. 

Hyunju was enjoying the girl’s reactions, it made her want to see more. So, she carefully grabbed her slim legs and slowly spread them apart. Hyunju pressed her clothed crotch against the girl’s soaked cunt, her hips began rolling in all sorts of directions. 

“But we’re just getting started,” The woman grinned before hungrily kissing her.

Youngmi let out a loud pathetic moan, her hips unknowingly began to move around the woman’s crotch, desperately trying to feel any kind of friction. Despite a thin piece of cloth separating their parts, she could feel everything, it made her legs tremble. 

The woman’s thrusts quickened and their moans grew louder. Although they were not having “real” sex, this was the most pleasure Youngmi had ever felt. Hyunju moved her mouth down to the girl’s breasts, she palmed the side of them and began licking and sucking on her sensitive nipples. 

“I can’t hold it anymore, unnie-” The younger girl cried out, overwhelmed with pleasure. 

“Me neither…” Hyunju breathlessly said. “Let’s finish together…”

The thrusts became more aggressive and rough, the bed had begun to loudly creak and it probably made players around them wake up. But neither of them cared, their minds were too foggy to stop. 

Youngmi clung tightly onto the woman’s broad shoulders, her fingernails digging into her back. Her whole body shook, and a sharp gasp escaped her lips. She came. Her mind was spinning and she swore she was floating. 

Feeling the girl pathetically rub herself on her crotch, seeing her eyes rolled back, and mouth hanging wide open, it was all too much for Hyunju. With one final thrust, her hips tensed up as she released her own pleasure. 

Hyunju collapsed right beside the girl, panting like crazy. “I love you…” She whispered, still trying to catch her breath. 

Youngmi, still high from the pleasure, immediately whipped her head to face the woman. “What?” She blurted, her eyes wide in disbelief. 

She turned her head over to meet Youngmi’s gaze, “I love you. I’ve loved you since the moment I first saw you during the second game.” Hyunju confessed. “I thought it was obvious,”

Youngmi simply blinked, her mind racing as she proceeded Hyunju’s confession. Her heart thudded loud against her chest, “I had no idea…”

“Really? I mean it was obvious that you liked me.” Hyunju giggled. 

Youngmi let out a loud gasp, “What?! You knew?!” She tried her hardest not to scream. 

“You didn’t think I never noticed how you always clinged onto me? I figured you either felt safe with me or you liked me. Turns out it was both.” The woman grinned. 

Youngmi could die of embarrassment. She was bright red and hid her face in her hands, wanting to disappear forever. 

“I found that so adorable…” Hyunju took her hands off her face, “I want to protect you and be by your side forever… I promise, after tomorrow’s game, we’ll go home. I promise that this time we’ll have dinner, just the two of us.” 

She wanted to trust the woman, she really did. But something in her gut was telling her that wasn’t going to happen. For now, she didn’t want to think about what the future held or whether they’d survive another day. All she wanted at this moment was to feel Hyunju’s warmth, to hold her close and pretend, even for a little while, that they were safe. Youngmi pulled her close, their sweaty naked bodies pressing onto each other. They lay in silence, holding each other tightly, both afraid to let go. 

Youngmi quietly stared at Hyunju, she could never get used to her beauty. Her strong jawline, her kind eyes, and her soft lips, everything was perfect. 

“You’re so beautiful, unnie.” Youngmi quietly said, this time, wanting Hyunju to hear. 

Hyunju simply smiled, “So are you,” she replied, her hand went to the girl’s cheek and gently stroked it. 

Youngmi leaned into her touch. Hyunju tightened her grip around the girl, her lips brushed against Youngmi’s hair. In her arms, Youngmi felt safe and loved, nothing could ever take this away. Although the future was uncertain, they had each other, and for now, that was all that mattered. 

Chapter Text

Hyunju sat silently on the deck of her small house, her legs stretched out and feet in the sand. The sky was a beautiful shade of pink and orange, the waves softly rolling onto the shore, and birds chirping out in the distance. It was a peaceful serene, it was the kind of life Hyunju always dreamed of. She never imagined it could be real, yet her she was, barefoot and wearing her favorite sundress. Everything was almost perfect. The only thing missing was Youngmi. 

She wished the girl was here to experience this with her, and to be in her warm arms. Hyunju closed her eyes, letting the gentle beach breeze hit her face. She imagined Youngmi resting her head against her shoulder, her hair tickling her cheek, and her sweet smile on her lips. 

She suddenly smelt a strange scent coming from inside the house, like something was burning. Hyunju shot her eyes open, quickly got on her feet, and ran inside. Black smoke filled the air, she immediately started coughing. As she made her way towards the source of the burning, she saw Youngmi in front of the stove wearing a cute oversized apron, holding a spatula, and looking completely clueless. 

“What are you doing?!” Hyunju called out as she coughed some more and fanned out the air. 

“I’m making breakfast for my beautiful wife,” Youngmi sweetly smiled, acting as if she did nothing wrong. 

“You never make breakfast… or even wake up at 6am…” Hyunju explained.

“Well today is a special day, and I wanted to surprise you!” The girl replied, she beamed with joy. 

It was a special day. It was their two year anniversary of being an official couple. 

Hyunju walked over towards the girl, she lazily wrapped her arms around her small thin body and squeezed her tightly. “I love you,” she whispered into her ear. 

Youngmi giggled. “I love you too, unnie.”

“If you love me then you’d let me finish up breakfast.” Hyunju said playfully.

The girl gasped before pouting, “fine…”

It was a miracle that Youngmi was still here and alive. Hyunju had countless nightmares of that day. The day where Youngmi almost died because of her stupid mistake. If only I held her tighter, she wouldn’t have slipped off my hands. She thought. Seeing her helpless on the ground, blood smeared everywhere, and the countdown going down, it all made Hyunju panic. To make matters worse, a player pushed himself inside their room, the room that was supposed to have Youngmi in. She was now locked outside, her desperate attempts to get in and her pleading teary eyes made Hyunju go insane, Youngmi was going to die. But at the very last second, a player pulled her and shoved her into a room next to theirs. It was a bit aggressive and harsh, but she was alive. As soon as the doors unlocked, Hyunju pushed everyone aside and ran to Youngmi, the two girls were sobbing in each other’s arms, they promised to never get separated ever again. After that day, they never let go of each other, their fingers were always interlocked. 

“I love you, like a lot.” Hyunju said once again.

“I love you too…” The girl replied, “Now let’s eat! We have a long day of fun!”

Hyunju nodded. She stared at the girl, wondering what she ever did to deserve such an amazing beautiful girlfriend. She always dreamed of this life, living on the seaside of a small town with a cute girlfriend to wake up to, but she never imagined it would come true. And it was all thanks to Gihun, the man who helped them escape and save hundreds of lives. 

Gihun’s plan worked. Some lives were lost in the process, but in the end all the players were safely rescued. 

After Hyunju went back for Daeho, the pink colored guards bursted in. There was no going back to help Gihun. Even though she wanted to, she had a fully loaded gun and was ready to shoot her way out, Geumja stopped her which was probably for the best. 

Three days went by with no games, no deaths, and no information from Gihun. They were left isolated, constantly worried and terrified. The only time the guards appeared was when it was lunch time, other than that, they were left completely alone. 

On the morning of day four, the players were abruptly awoken by the sound of gunshots and loud bangs. Everyone quickly got up and hid, some even huddling each other for comfort. Hundreds of policemen in black came barging in, it was the SWAT. Seeing men in black and not in a bright pink uniform was relieving, they were here to rescue them. 

Paramedics came rushing in right after and tended to those who were severely injured. The players were individually escorted out and taken to be shipped back to the mainland. There, each player was interrogated and were asked to talk about what happened on that island. The public quickly got hold of this information and were enraged. They protested and asked to investigate more closely to figure out if these games were being played in different countries to which they were right. 

After months of questioning, visiting the police station, and serving in court cases, the players were all free and given a fair amount of money as compensation. The owner of the Squid Game was sentenced to life in prison shortly after, but the public wanted the death sentence. 

And as promised, Geumja, Youngsik, Hyunju, and Youngmi all had dinner at Geumja’s house. Despite all the trauma they had faced, the four of them shared laughter and love with each other, nothing was taking that away from them. 

  It was a bit awkward at the beginning for Hyunju and Youngmi, they’ve only ever interacted while their lives were on the line, but now that they were free, they didn't know what to do. Especially since they shared so many intimate moments together. Were they dating? They never made things between them official. They decided it was best to just let things happen in the meantime. 

During that time, Hyunju’s mother reached out. It surprised the two girls since they knew her mother practically disowned her after coming out as transgender. It turned out that her parents were informed of the kidnapping of Hyunju, and despite how unaccepting they were towards her, they still cared for her as their child. Her mother cried relentlessly and her father stayed silent, drowning in his worries and guilt, they blamed themselves for putting her in that situation. But at the end, they apologized, for everything, even for being so close minded about her gender identity. Hyunju left their house in tears, never in a million years did she think they would address her as a woman. She immediately called Youngmi and explained everything to her. 

The decision was made. Hyunju and Youngmi were moving to Thailand, they both wanted to start a new life in a competently new country. So, they immediately booked a one way flight to Thailand with no regrets. 

With the money they earned, they bought a house right on the seashore, it was something that Hyunju always dreamed of. While Youngmi bought furniture and decorated the new place, Hyunju spent her time in hospitals, she wanted to get her surgery done as soon as possible. 

Everything was moving along perfectly, it felt like a dream. 

“I’m exhausted…” Youngmi said as she dropped her bag on the wooden floorboard and jumped into bed.

“All we did was go watch a movie and eat dinner?” Laughed Hyunju, she jumped in right after. 

“I just want to lay in bed all day with you, unnie!” Youngmi’s arms wrapped tightly around the woman’s body. “I never want to let you go!”

Hyunju giggled and agreed. Youngmi’s personality was so different compared to how she was during the games. When she met her, the girl was shy and very quiet, but as she got to know her more, she became more comfortable. She was a bit shocked at how bright and bubbly Youngmi really was, the woman found it extremely adorable and attractive. 

“We made it, unnie…” Youngmi whispered, her tone suddenly turning serious.

“Yeah, we did,” Hyunju replied, she pulled the girl closer and pressed her lips on her forehead. 

Silence filled the room, it was comforting and warm. 

Youngmi stared up at the woman, her eyes sparkling. “Have I ever told you that you’re really beautiful…” she added while quietly giggling like a shy little girl. 

“You are too, Youngmi,” she replied, laughing back. 

Hyunju smiled, her heart felt warm and fuzzy. For the first time in her life, she felt like she was exactly where she was meant to be. She found love and she found herself. 

With Youngmi in her arms, the future seemed bright. Although it was still uncertain, together they could face anything. They were free and they were home.