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The Planet’s Sanctuary.
It’s every bit as massive and overwhelming as Cloud imagined it would be.
Wide open space with stairs upon stairs leading to ever elevating platforms, unsupported yet somehow stable. And all overcast by light that gives everything a strange shade of white and blue.
Cloud cannot concern himself with that right now though, as he’s there for a reason. The most important reason of his life.
Aerith is here. She is on the altar of the Sanctuary, praying for help and guidance. For the strength to protect the Planet, her friends… and the one she loves.
And she needs his help.
He’s at the other end of the altar, so close yet so far away. And for reasons he can’t explain, the feeling of dread is building up in him. Seeing her alone, eyes closed, on her knees, hands clasped together in prayer. She’s in such a vulnerable position right now, it’s terrifying.
He tries to call out to her, to warn her, but she can’t hear him.
He can’t hear him.
He tries to run towards her, but it feels like he’s moving in slow motion while the world around him continues in real time. With every slow step he becomes more frustrated that he’s unable to reach her.
Then he sees the one thing he hoped he wouldn’t see.
Sephiroth.
Leaping down from above, Masamune pointed towards Aerith as she continues to pray to the Planet for help.
Cloud can’t move fast enough. He can’t call her. His worst fear draws closer and closer to fruition.
“NO!!!” he tries to scream.
But he’s unable to stop what comes next.
The blade pierces through her back, severing her spine and cutting off all vital organs. Her eyes go wide, and Cloud thinks he can see tears leak out. All he can do now is watch in horror as the love of his life dies violently.
The blade exits and Aerith falls limp to the floor, blood draining out of her wound.
Suddenly Cloud is kneeling on the altar floor, holding her body against him.
“Aerith?” he finally hears himself say.
No response.
“AERITH!!”
She’s not moving. Not breathing. Her eyes, once big and bright, now stare lifelessly at nothing. Her blood is seeping onto his pants and gloves, but he doesn’t notice.
All he notices is that his eyes are burning. His throat is dry. His whole body feels numb.
Please, please don’t go…
Don’t leave me…
Unable to fight his grief, he cries out hoarsely to anyone who will hear him: his friends, the Cetra, hell even the Planet itself, anyone at all.
To help him.
To save her.
To not take her away from him.
He squeezes his eyes shut, unable to look at the body of the one he’d come to love now dead in his arms, hoping that if he keeps them shut long enough, then all of this will go away. Hot tears continue to flow and burn his face as he sobs uncontrollably.
Suddenly he feels arms wrap around him.
“Cloud…”
That voice... It’s…
“Cloud!”
Aerith?? But you’re dead. How…
“Cloud, wake up!”
He opens his eyes finally, and though the world around him is dark and blurred by his tears, he can faintly see that there is someone looking down at him with big emerald eyes, and as his vision clears, he begins to make out the source of the voice despite the darkness.
It’s Aerith.
Alive.
Holding him as he retches and hyperventilates, a worried frown on her face.
Gasping for air, he tries to calm himself down, all the while Aerith holds him tight.
“Shhhhh,” she soothes. “It’s okay, Cloud. You’re okay.”
Cloud tries in vain to regain his composure. “Aerith… what…?” he croaks weakly.
“Shhhhhh, everything’s okay,” she continues to reassure him calmly. “You were having a bad dream.”
A dream.
It was all just a dream.
But it felt so real.
Aerith reaches for his hand and brings it to her cheek, leaning into it.
“See? I’m real,” she whispers, as if reading his mind for what seems like the millionth time since they met. “I’m right here, Cloud.”
Cloud exhales sharply in shock. “How did…”
“You were screaming my name in your sleep,” she explains. A smirk spreads across her face, the urge to tease her lover being too much despite the circumstance. “And not in the good way.”
Cloud sighs, trying to stifle the sob that threatens to erupt at any moment. He would laugh if not for the grief that is still burning inside him. Now that he’s come to his senses, he takes her in. Her green eyes glimmer with sympathy and love as they gaze into his own. Her golden-brown hair hangs around her shoulders, messy from sleep but somehow still beautiful. She’s wearing the night gown he had gotten her a few months ago. Light pink. Her favorite.
Finally, he speaks up. “I’m sorry… I… didn’t mean to wake you,” he apologizes, his voice still quivering as much as he tries to hide how shaken he is.
Aerith smiles her forgiveness. “Don’t worry about it,” she whispers. She releases his hand to gently trail her thumbs along his cheeks, wiping away the tears that still stain them. Her touch melts away the lump in his throat, the burning in his chest.
Cloud smiles back at her, something very few people besides her have ever seen from him. A smile of relief that barely pierces through the darkness of night that surrounds the two of them.
“C’mere,” Aerith mumbles as she lays back onto the mattress, pulling Cloud so that his head is resting on her chest and his body curls into hers, her arms wrapped around him.
“What are you doing?” Cloud questions, even though he makes no effort to stop her.
Aerith giggles softly. “I’m protecting you from the nightmares, silly,” she whispers, pulling the covers back over them both. “If they want to get to you, they’ll have to go through me.”
Cloud chuckles. “And here I thought I was supposed to be protecting you.”
“We protect each other, Cloud,” she replies. “Always.”
Her voice is hushed and sweet when she speaks these words, but Cloud knows how serious she is when she says it. It is an affirmation she has used many times against his doubts.
Before she allows them both to sleep again, she asks one last question, her tone again turning sympathetic.
“It was the altar, wasn’t it?”
Cloud sighs, his breath tickling her skin. “Yeah… the altar…”
Aerith tightens her arms around him, pulling him closer. “I get nightmares too sometimes… of what might have been. About Masamune piercing through me… except it’s not quick like it would’ve been. I feel all of it, so much pain and agony, and it never ends. And the worst part is…” her voice quivers, and she swallows to try and quell the lump that’s developing in her throat, “… I’m all alone. Just bleeding out there on the floor in so much pain… alone.”
She pauses and takes a deep breath as a tear drips off her eyelashes.
“But then…” she continues, her voice sounding a little more hopeful, “I wake up. And I see that I’m still alive. I’m alive because the man I have in my arms right now defied fate to give me a second chance at life.” She smiles. “And I realize… that everything’s alright.” She sighs deeply and relaxes her cheek against his head.
Cloud can’t help but dwell on what she had told him. What if it had turned out that way again? What if he had been too late to save her? What if he was forced to watch as Sephiroth succeeded in killing her, like however many timelines that came before? What if her last moments alive were spent in unimaginable pain? What if he had to live the rest of his life on the Planet without her?
Cloud sighs shakily, trying to suppress the grief that still clings to him. Aerith notices and lifts her head from his, turning him to look her in the eye as she caresses his cheek, once again using her thumb to wipe away a fresh tear that has leaked from his eyes. She knows something horrible has crossed his mind and he doesn’t want her to know, wants to shield her from it.
“Hey, no holding in your feelings!” she scolds gently. “Talk to me.”
Cloud braces himself. Admitting his dark thoughts is always the hardest part, but he knows Aerith will not let up until he shares his burden that she might help him carry it. So he looks her in the eyes and speaks.
“I can’t help but think about… what would happen if I hadn’t stopped the blade. If I failed you again…” his voice cracks on the last word. “I know it’s not what happened, but… the thought of what could’ve been is too much sometimes…”
Aerith’s eyes are swimming with compassion and it hurts for Cloud to look at.
“I know,” she whispers with so much emotion and understanding, it hits him as much as her shouting at him would have.
He had expected some sort of chastising over thinking of such things, over beating himself up over things that didn’t happen. He would’ve never expected “I know.”
She continues. “Even if I had lost my life that day, just know that I wouldn’t have held it against you.” Her smile at this point is so sweet, so heartwarming, it almost makes Cloud break down harder. “But it didn’t turn out that way. I’m here, you’re here, our friends are here. That’s all that matters.” She strokes his cheek again and her light smile perks up into a grin.
“Dilly dally shilly shally…” she remarks, in a way that feels like she’s not saying it directly to Cloud, or anyone really.
Cloud looks at her with light confusion. “You know, you never explained to me what that means.”
Aerith giggles. “Honestly… I don’t know. It’s just fun to say.”
Cloud snorts as he lays his head back down on her, and she giggles again as she lays hers back on his. Cloud’s grip tightens around her abdomen, and he nestles further into the crook of her neck, as if to silently reestablish his promise of never letting her go. He finally allows his eyes to close, relaxing into her as she cradles his head, stroking the ends of his hair. He breathes deeply, and as he does, he takes in her scent: flowers, fresh soil, and a hint of sweat that serves to remind him that this is real.
It’s as if the Planet itself is holding him, comforting him.
“Aerith?” he mumbles.
“Yeah?”
“Thank you…”
He feels her smile and her lips gently press against his head.
“I love you, my sweet little bodyguard,” she whispers into his blonde hair, one final affirmation before the two of them drift back off to sleep.
And that night, Cloud has another dream.
A good one.
Sitting on the beach of Costa Del Sol, the sun setting and the sky turning beautiful shades of yellow and red. Aerith is next to him, hand in hand as they watch the evening waves roll across the shore one by one.
And for some reason, he’s wearing a diaper.
FIN