Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

            When Levi left the Tokyo Shatterdome, he swore he'd never return. There were too many memories, and a certain person who haunted his years away from the place. 

            Yet… Here he was, three years later, staring down at the wretched place from a helicopter. The cold wind nipped at his nose, and the rain soaked through his pants, yet Levi's eyes refused to look away from their landing zone. No one was there to greet him, but he hadn't exactly expected a warm welcome. He didn't want to be there, either- but things were dire. 

            While Jaegers were being decommissioned, Kaiju just kept coming. Despite this, the world seemed intent to focus on their walls and their military. It didn't make any damn sense to Levi. The Jaegers were their best fighting chance against the Kaiju, and yet the age of pilots seemed to be coming to an end. They’re all damned idiots.

            Levi's eyes finally leave the landing pad as he hears the deafening sound of many helicopters, and the screeching sound of metal rubbing metal. It's hard to miss the Jaeger being settled into the loading bay of the Tokyo Shatterdome. She was huge , and she was all Levi's . He can't help a fond smile, knowing that, at the very least, his Jaeger would be happy to be home, even if Levi wasn't.

            Winged Freedom's a Mark 2, and she was built to last. Levi had piloted her through countless battles, and killed many Kaiju. She, and by extension, him , had the highest kill count of any Jaeger or pilot. She'd lost arms, legs, ran out of fuel, given Levi a lot of hell… But she was an amazing thing. He gets a little lump in his throat. It's pathetic, but that Jaeger had been through hell and back with him, and many a pilot. He couldn't help but be attached.

            Their helicopter finally sinks too far down for Levi to look at her any longer, the sight of the wings painted across her back lingering in his mind. He squares his shoulders and sets his jaw, taking a deep breath to ready himself for who he’d have to face now.

            He jumps out of the helicopter as soon as he's allowed to, swinging his bag over his shoulder and stalking over to the elevator. He's supposed to have an escort taking him to the Marshal, but Levi knew this place like the back of his hand. He didn't need someone showing him around like he was some lost dog. As soon as he's on the main floor, Levi's slipping through the doors and down the hall. His mind conjures up memory after memory in each hallway he passes, reminding him of a time he'd tried to snub out. I don't need this. He's lucky I even decided to agree to this call.

            Levi had been perfectly content to keep fighting over in the United States, but the world wasn't. Shatterdome after Shatterdome was shut down, and the last of the pilots recalled to the final Shatterdome: Tokyo. Not many even wanted to bother coming back, but Levi had a duty to fulfill. He'd keep going until every last Kaiju was stopped, or he was dead. When he’d been told that Winged Freedom would be decommissioned and used as scrap unless he went back to Tokyo, Levi had already made his decision.

            Finally, Levi reaches the main bridge. He recognizes many of the people working, and they recognize him- but Levi's eyes find a familiar figure in the center of the room. He hadn't seen him since the last time he'd been at the Tokyo Shatterdome- since the last time he'd ever felt whole with someone else in the drift. 

            “Erwin Smith.” Levi's voice is cold as he calls out the name. The Marshal turns to him, and he doesn’t miss the way Erwin's face poorly conceals his shock. Everyone else seems more shocked that Levi had called him by name. Levi takes him in for a few seconds, a tight feeling in his chest. Erwin looked… older. It had only been three years, but it seemed like those three years had aged him by ten instead. His arm was still gone, as gone as it had been back then- but Erwin seemed accustomed to it. He even filled out the uniform nicely. Levi swallowed thickly and flicked his eyes back up to the man's gaze, wondering what Erwin would be thinking. “Levi Ackerman, reporting for duty. Don't make me regret coming back here, Marshal. ”

            Erwin maintains eye contact with Levi as the man steps up to him, his expression shifting from shock to relief. You made it safely. “Ackerman,” he starts, letting his eyes inspect him - the past few years had weathered Levi, he could tell. The crinkles around his eyes had grown more, deeper with his experience. Of course, the man hadn’t grown up at all, either - still just as short as he was before, which Erwin found he enjoyed the most.

            The past few years had gone by in a blur for him. Once Levi had left the Tokyo Shatterdome - left him - well, Erwin hadn’t been able to find someone compatible enough to pilot with him, especially with his unfortunate debilitation. So, instead of piloting the Winged Freedom again, the Jaeger went off to other Jaeger pilots - and Erwin found himself as, initially, the instructor for Jaeger pilots in training. Eventually, he’d gained enough respect to climb the ranks, and now, he found himself as the Marshal of the Tokyo Shatterdome. 

            … Marshal. The way Levi spat the word rang in Erwin’s mind. Disdain. Erwin didn’t pay too much mind to the way he spoke. He’d known that, somehow, Levi had convinced himself that Erwin wasn’t worthy of him anymore, or his attention. Regardless, Erwin still had to pay him some respect - and it wasn’t as easy to shut away the warmth he felt seeing Levi safe and unharmed.

            ”I pulled a lot of strings to make sure you were transferred here rather than being sent to the wall project,” Erwin says, turning from the previous people he was conversing with to Levi, stepping up to him. “They wanted to recycle Winged Freedom’s sword thrusters for the repair of a Mark 3 Jaeger. It’s quite insulting, so I was hoping you would have accepted my offer. …I knew you would.”

            “It's very insulting. It's fucking ridiculous that they'd scrap her for some stupid Mark 3. She's in perfectly good condition, and a better Jaeger than most of the ones still kicking.” Levi's eyes raked across the crowd watching them, glaring at several until they took the hint to quit. He crosses his arms and turns his glare back to Erwin, clearly displeased. “You know I'd do anything to keep that Jaeger alive, Smith. You're an asshole for using her against me. What do you even need me for?”

            Erwin’s gaze flicks across the crowd of people in the room, landing on some of the pilot recruits, before he gestures over to them for Levi to look, too. “I’ve gathered some of the highest ranking pilots from the training corps to do some aptitude training with you. Hopefully, you’ll be able to Drift with at least one of them. Now that they’re shutting down the program, they weren’t able to fully complete their training, but I’m fully confident in all of their abilities. I’ll be overseeing your aptitude testing, as well. I’d like you to be equipped with a fully prepared and compatible pilot before I send you into the field. I suppose you don’t want to be introduced to your fellow Jaeger pilots?”

            “So, I'm stuck with green pilots? How thrilling. Couldn't even get one veteran who'd be willing to come back?” Levi scowls. 

            Erwin resists the urge to laugh at just how against the idea Levi was. “Well, I wish I had better options for you. The thing is that there… Weren’t any solo veteran pilots left, aside from me. And considering our circumstances, it isn’t logical for a man of my position to pilot again. …I doubt you would want me to.” He gestures back to the recruits. “So, they’re your best option. Knowing you, you’ll be able to turn one of them into a skilled pilot. I have no doubt about it. Go on, introduce yourself.”

            Levi drops his bag on the floor and stalks over to the newbies. Almost all of them are taller than him despite being years and years older, and that just pisses him off even more. “None of you are going to last even five minutes in a Jaeger with me, but I'll entertain the Marshal's attempts to pair me up just so he can see that this is pointless.” Levi paces in front of them, trying to get a read. None of them stand out… “I'm sure you heard, but I'm Levi Ackerman. I pilot the Mark 2 Jaeger Winged Freedom. I've killed more Kaiju than any of you have ever even seen. I have absolutely no faith in any of you, but we'll still try this. Do I make myself clear?”

            “Yes, sir!” Levi's a little satisfied with their respect, at the very least. Most of them seem quite afraid of him, except for one, who held a defiance in his eyes that Levi hadn't seen in a long while. He steps up to the boy, who couldn't have been more than eighteen years old, sizing him up. “What's your name, pilot?”

            “Eren Jaeger, sir!” Levi lets out a snort. It's ironic. “... Why are you laughing, sir?”

            “Your last name's Jaeger , and here you are trying to pilot one. It's fucking ridiculous.” Levi looks to the two people on either side of the boy. He vaguely recognizes the dark-haired girl beside him, but the blonde runt didn’t seem well-suited to be piloting a Jaeger either. He lets out a deep sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I think the Marshal is trying to get you all killed. None of you are-”

            “Respectfully, sir, if anyone is going to get us killed, it's you .” 

            Erwin narrows his gaze over at Eren, and the boy meets his eyes with a sudden nervous one of his own. However, even despite Erwin’s look, Eren’s dignity seems to return when he looks back at Levi. A part of him wants to speak up, but… He knew Levi wouldn't appreciate it. So, he simply looks over at the man, waiting for him.

            The silence filling the room is deafening. Levi's eyes immediately narrow in on Eren again, his voice deadly as he speaks his next words. “... And why do you say that ?”

            “W-Well…” Eren's voice wavers. “It's- It's just that all of your partners have either died or quit, sir. You don't have a very good track record. If you were really as talented as they say- would you really keep getting people killed?”

            “... I'm done here.” Levi picks up his bag and immediately turns around, pushing past Erwin on his way. It didn't matter if the boy was right. He did seem to have a knack for pushing away or killing the people closest to him, but that didn't mean jack shit. That asshole. Putting these young pilots with me… He's just asking them to die for him. Levi doesn't really know where to go, but he just needs to get away.

            ”Jaeger, control yourself. Insulting your potential partner will not bode well for you, especially considering that with the program’s potential shutdown, he is your only chance at piloting a real Jaeger.” Erwin frowns at the boy, who seems to shut up once he’s spoken, muttering a “Y-yes, sir”. He looks over towards their supervising officer - Officer Shadis - and gives him a slight nod. “You’re cleared for the day. Get to the dining hall. It’s almost time for dinner.”

            Erwin’s gaze flicks over to where Levi parted the crowd, and he follows after him, catching up to him when they’re in the hallway, surrounded by much less people - if any at all, except for those heading into the hangar. “Ackerman,” he calls, but when Levi doesn’t respond, he breaks into a jog, catching up behind him, placing his hand on his shoulder. “ Levi. ”

            When he speaks Levi’s name and the man stops, Erwin feels a small bit of relief, letting his hand drop from his shoulder. Levi takes a step back, but he doesn't run away, seemingly deciding to let Erwin speak his peace. Erwin lets out a small sigh, having the nerve to even seem a bit embarrassed. “I apologize about Eren Jaeger. He has a knack for being… Outspoken, but he ranked second in his training sector. He shows promise.” He glances down the hall, making sure nobody was near them before he continues. “If I had other options than them, I would have employed them. So, please… Just try and get along, okay?”

            “ He was the one who accused me of getting my co-pilots killed. Why are you getting on to me for his insubordination?” Levi doesn't curb his sharp tongue one bit. It didn't matter if Erwin was technically his superior now- he'd always be on the same level as Levi, at least in his mind. “This is ridiculous. They're greenies who haven't even finished their training. They'll be absolutely useless in the drift, unless they're some crazy once-in-a-generation talent. This plan is doomed to fail already. You know I can't just drift with anyone.”

            “I know.” Erwin takes in a deep breath before he seems to get his act together - and Marshal Smith seems to return back to his visage. “I won’t ask you to do anything else. Now, then, may I show you to your quarters? You’ll begin aptitude training tomorrow morning at 6 o’clock.”

            “I know where my quarters are. I used to live here too.” Levi inwardly groans at having to get up so early. Even if he didn’t sleep much, it didn't make him enjoy having to be up before the sun even rose. He scowls. “At least, I'm assuming you’re sticking me in our old room. My old room.” Levi's quick to correct himself. “It wouldn't make much sense for you to put me somewhere else… Unless you've got some stupid idea in your brain.”

            Erwin wears a small smile at how Levi says our, but he doesn’t linger on it. “No, you won’t be staying in your old quarters,” he says, turning and beginning to walk down the hallway, expecting Levi to follow. “You’ll be staying in the rooms alongside the recruits. This way, I expect you to be able to bond with them outside of aptitude tests. Out of all people, I suspect you know how important it is to have a connection to establish the Drift.” 

            “ What? ” If Levi's scowl could grow deeper, it did. He hurries to follow after him. “You've got to be kidding me. You're going to stick me with the recruits ? God, you must really be pissed at me to do that. Bonding my ass …”

            After a bit of awkward silence, Erwin leads the way into the dormitory hallway. He passes his current room, gazing at the number of their old room on the way, too - before they’re at the end of the hall. “Here you are. E-19. I made some arrangements for your room to be a solo room for now, but you’ll be expected to bunk with your future copilot. I appreciate your cooperation.” He adds a look into his last statement before he turns to the door, waiting for Levi. “…And I made sure to bring in your old things that you left behind. I hope you don’t mind, but I did my best to ensure they were in pristine condition while you were away. Especially the photos. You treasured those.”

            Levi lets out a huff. He knows that look anywhere. It was a if you don't cooperate like I'm asking you to, I'm going to have to do something I don't really want to have to do, so behave. Levi would humor him for now, at least. Do it for Winged Freedom. It's her last chance… and yours. “You didn't have to keep all that.” 

            There's a twinge in Levi's chest that's unfamiliar to him. He fixes his bag on his shoulder and opens the door, pushing it open with a little difficulty. The room inside looks identical to all the others. It's dirty … And Levi tries not to cringe as he swipes his fingers across a desk and it's covered in dust and grime. He tosses his bag onto the bed and goes to where he assumed Erwin had hung up all his old photos, and left all the things he'd abandoned in his room. 

            His eyes quietly drift across them, catching on familiar faces that had been gone for a while. Furlan, Petra, Isabel… Levi purses his lips. Right in the center, exactly how Levi had left it, was a picture of himself and Erwin in front of their Jaeger. Back then, Winged Freedom had been new. She was shiny, her paint unchipped- and her two pilots were much the same way. Fresh-faced, young, devoid of all the pain and agony they'd soon go through. He lingers on the photo a bit longer. Erwin's smiling, one arm thrown around Levi's shoulders while the other gave an awkward thumbs up. Levi himself was scowling, forced into the photo just to satisfy Erwin… but it was a fond memory, all the same. There was a reason why he kept it up.

            Erwin’s leaning against the doorway, watching Levi as he inspects what he left behind for him. He smiles as Levi focuses on the photos, tilting his head a little to see which ones Levi was looking at specifically. At this point, Erwin was unfortunate to recognize each photo - he most definitely didn’t gaze at them nightly when Levi had left - and seeing him focus on the photo of him and Levi… It has him feeling emotional. He tries not to think about it, especially when he moves onto the more physical memories left behind.

            Finally, Levi looks at what else has been left out for him. An old steel water bottle, a few books, a set of rusted keys… and his old jacket. There were a few more things Levi could look at, but his fingers brushed against the wings stitched into the back. His name was printed above it, and there were patches along the arms and on the front to commemorate all the successful Kaiju kills and missions he'd been on. It had been a long time since he'd seen it. He quickly draws away before he gets too attached, taking a shaky breath. “... Did you leave this all out on purpose, Smith?”

            “I did.” Erwin straightens up as Levi turns to him, trying to appear much more professional than he felt. “I wanted these things to remind you of what you were before - who you were. I.. Wanted it to inspire you.” He scratches his cheek absentmindedly. “Of everyone in this building, it’s I who can understand finding it… Difficult to move on after the loss of a partner. I wanted this to show you that you can find someone new to pilot Winged Freedom with you.”

            Erwin’s cheeks flex a little as he tenses his jaw, although that’s about the most emotion that shows on his face after he says that. “The recruits I’ve provided you with are plenty capable of piloting her with you. I’ve evaluated each of their performances myself, and I’ve hand-picked them for you, specifically. If you do not choose one of them, Winged Freedom will be used for scrap. There’s not much else I can do for you beyond this, Levi. …I’m sorry to back you into a corner, but if you want to continue being a Jaeger pilot, then you need to choose one of them.”

            “Yeah, right. Sorry. That's a load of shit and you know it.” And just like that, whatever moment that was going on between them is gone. Levi's mask is on and his walls raised, clearly angered by Erwin's words. “You'd use anything you could to leverage me back here. I'm not doing this for you, Smith. I hope you realize that. I'm only here because it's my last chance to do something. If she gets dismantled, it's… the end for me. I'll have nothing. I'm useless if I can't fight with her. You know that, and you're letting them use that against me. This is my life. ”

            Levi has to take a deep breath to calm his emotions, his shoulders tense and jaw clenched. “Those recruits don't deserve to die out there. They're barely even adults. You're asking me to pick someone to die at my side, and I'm not doing that. You'll have to be the one to force my hand. Now get out. ”

            Erwin’s jaw tenses a little more, grinding his teeth. He lets out a soft sigh before he turns to leave… And he pauses in the doorway, needing to say something else. “...They’ve volunteered themselves knowing the full possibility of them losing their lives on the line of duty. I haven’t sugar-coated the task at all for them. They’re doing this for the same reasons you are - to fight back. The moment you accept that is the moment you can keep them from dying. You’re the one I trust the most to protect them. If they pilot with each other…”

            He stops there, closing his eyes and taking in a deep breath himself. “...Six A.M. tomorrow morning, in the D sector. Breakfast will be served in the mess hall at five. Don’t be late, or you’ll get behavior points on your record.” With that, he grabs the door and shuts it behind him, the loud slam echoing throughout the room.

Chapter Text

            Even though Levi thought behavior points were bullshit, he wasn't late to breakfast. But just because he was there didn't mean he had to be with everyone else. He got the standard military slop and immediately took his tray to the furthest and emptiest corner of the mess hall. He could feel everyone's eyes on him, but he simply ignored them all. He avoided anyone who might know him- Erwin especially. His blood still burned with what Erwin had told him the night before, and anytime he thought about him, it brought that feeling back tenfold. He'd ripped down the photo of himself and Erwin, stuffing it and the jacket deep in one of the drawers. He didn't even want to think about him.

            He'd picked at his breakfast and then slipped out after dropping his tray off at the kitchen, deciding to head to aptitude training early. There wasn't anything else for him to do, so why not get a little warm-up in? When he gets there, he's quick to get changed. He wasn't really a fan of the shirts provided for training, but he didn't really have a reason to complain, quickly going from his long-sleeved shirt to the provided muscle shirt. He felt much too exposed, but it wasn't like it mattered. Whatever. I just want to get this over with. 

           He spends the next ten minutes or so practicing his technique, already preparing for failure after failure with the new Cadets. He knew there was a small chance any of them would be compatible. He was a terrible drift partner. He carried too much into the drift, unlike many others. It was hard for others to deal with that. Except one…

            Levi lets out a yell with his next swing, tossing the stick aside. He wipes his brow and turns to get a drink, using the old bottle from his room- thoroughly washed, of course. “You can stop trying to hide, you know. You're being a creep. ”

Out from the doorway into the training room, Erwin emerges from the shadows, giving a small clap. “Look at you. Still looking as limber as always. Have you even gotten better since the last time I saw you?” he asks as he steps over to the side, over to the onlooker chairs, where he sets down his case and takes off his jacket, revealing himself to be in a similar muscle shirt to Levi. Unlike Levi, though, he was completely shameless of how he looked.

            “Of course I’ve gotten better. I've been training for three years. Unlike you, I haven't grown soft.” The claim doesn't quite hold any water, especially as his eyes drift over Erwin's form. Still as big as ever, I see. “Whatever.”

            When Erwin had seen Levi training, he couldn’t help but admire him just a bit. Each and every move Levi was using was familiar to him - probably because Erwin had been inside of Levi’s mind himself, had learned the same moves he had just through the years he’d fought by his side as a Jaeger pilot. Even now, Levi had a sort of grace to his movements even Erwin seemed to lack, even if the man knew each of those moves personally. It was entrancing.

            Erwin sighs softly. Unlike Levi, it was obvious that the man still treasured what he had with him - but, also unlike Levi, he saw it as a thing of the past. Erwin would more than likely never pilot a Jaeger again. The only man he was willing to pilot one with practically hated his guts. It made him feel grief for his lost future, but also… “Mm. Forgive me for being a little curious.” He steps over to the training rack before picking up one of the sparring sticks, giving it a whirl in his hand before he looks over at Levi, giving him a small smile. Levi watches his moves, returning the smile with a raised brow.

            “You’re also here early. When I saw you leave the mess hall in a hurry, I thought I’d come and see what you were up to. Of course you’re only thinking of the mission.” Erwin sighs softly before he steps up a few paces in front of Levi, spinning the stick again before pointing it towards him. “Care for a round or two? I’ll help you warm up.”

            “What, you think you're even going to be worth a damn while missing an arm?” Levi leans over and picks up his sparring stick again, taking up the challenge. He stretches his arms out and lets his stick meet Erwin's. “Fine. Show me that you still have some fight in you, you old dog.”

            “ Old? Aren’t I only about four years your senior, Levi?” Erwin laughs before he hits Levi’s stick with his own - initiating the match. He starts with a quick dive to his legs, quicker than a man with one arm should usually move, forcing Levi to go on the defensive for his first move. The smack of their sticks echoes through the room as Levi deflects each of Erwin’s hits, and it’s clear that Erwin is only aiming for his body to test his defense. 

            “ Mmh. Always quick with it. You’ve gotten slower, though, Levi. Haven’t done this in a while, is that it?” Erwin taunts, tilting his head a little as he dips down - making a swing at Levi’s legs, hitting his leg once to knock him off balance before he aims up, planning to make a swift move for the man’s jaw to knock him down and out entirely, but Levi deflects it before it can land. He scoffs, taking a step back and spinning the stick again. “Good. Still have your reflexes, though.”

            “You asshole…” Levi huffs as he regains his balance, knowing he'd lost the first point, regardless if Erwin had been successful or not. It pisses him off. He brandishes his own stick, not one for theatrics like Erwin was. He takes a moment to stalk around Erwin, analyzing him. I already know he'll be prepared to protect his right side. Would he expect an attack from the left? Or would he expect me to do that, instead? Hm… “... This is an interesting fight.”

            Instead of doing either of those options, Levi dives directly for Erwin's center, swinging left. Still, just before Erwin can block the blow, Levi reveals that it was just a feint. He lands on his back hand and sweeps his foot out to catch Erwin's, but the man seems to predict that, too, just not fast enough. Levi catches just his heel and sends him off balance, almost feeling bad, but Levi was ruthless. He's back on his feet before Erwin can recover, mimicking Erwin’s move from earlier. He stops inches from his chin, panting already. “... That's one to one. Don't lose your edge already.”

            “…Good. I was afraid you lost yours.” Erwin knocks Levi’s stick away, gaining his balance again and letting his gaze inspect Levi’s stance. There it is. He’s wanting me to not be able to read him. I can’t tell if he’s going to be offensive or defensive. And, knowing him, he can switch his strategy on the spot. He doesn’t need to switch his footing. The best place to aim for would be… Erwin aims right for Levi’s stick, swinging his pole downwards to force Levi into a horizontal block. The second his stick hits Levi’s, he jousts it forward, hitting Levi square in the chest with the end, sending him stumbling a few feet back, giving Erwin the opportunity to swing the stick towards his neck, hovering just above it - another round won. “Two to one. Are you underestimating my strength, Levi? You know, I’ve had to focus on working out just one arm for the past few years. I’ve gotten handy with using it.”

            “ Tch. ” The attack had come as a surprise, but Levi wasn't going to let it throw him off. He pushes Erwin's stick away from his face and resets his stance- clearly on the offensive this time. He doesn't wait long to start his attack, much more aggressive this time, hoping to find a gap in Erwin's defense. He keeps pushing and pushing, met with block after block until he finally finds a weakness. His left. Overcompensating for his right. I knew it… Levi makes quick work of exploiting that weakness, attacking Erwin's left side harshly before sneaking in a left-side swing, hovering once again just beside Erwin’s. This time, he doesn't pause for them both to continue their bearings. “Two-two. And we've got a crowd. ”

            Levi hasn't missed how the people meant to be sparring against him have started to wander in, crowding around to watch the two fight. Levi focuses back on Erwin, determined to win this with one more point. He couldn't embarrass himself now. 

            Erwin’s gaze flicks over to the people watching them, and he has half a mind to talk to them - but as he meets Levi’s gaze again, and he sees the determination in his gaze, one Erwin didn’t think he’d see so closely again… It sets him ablaze once again, and he readies his stick. “Watch and learn, pilots.”

            He cracks a genuine smile, the adrenaline rushing through his veins almost unfamiliar to him. It had been so long since Erwin had felt like this, on fire, ready to fight. It reminded him of who he was when he was still a pilot. Still Levi’s partner. The thought alone gets Erwin a bit sour, especially with the fatigue weighing down on him - he wasn’t used to fighting like this, not anymore. Erwin takes in a deep breath before he starts his attack, flashing his stick forward, aiming for Levi’s blind spots.

            Levi takes a more defensive route this time as Erwin starts his counter-attack, but Levi was beginning to see him fall apart by now. Must be getting tired. He's having a hard time reading my moves now. I can end this… But… Levi almost didn't want to. This was the most he'd enjoyed a spar like this in years. Even with one arm, Erwin could keep up with him, point for point. It was frustrating and thrilling, and all at the same time. “Come on! I know you're falling behind, Erwin!”

            Erwin feels a rush of frustration flow over him at Levi’s taunt, a frown painting his visage as he chooses to focus on the taunt itself and not the fact that Levi had spoken his name. He focuses his pole on quick jabs at Levi’s sides, going as quick as he could. Of course, Levi is quicker - and before he knows it, Levi meets the jab with his own pole, and the wood splinters under the pressure of Erwin’s hand, breaking the pole in two. Erwin’s eyes widen as the wood clatters to the ground, and he straightens up, giving a glance down to his hand, poked with splinters. “..Mm. Three-two. Good job, Levi.” 

            He pulls his hand closer to himself, stepping to the side as blood trickles down his arm. Erwin pays no mind to his injury as he steps to the side, holding his arm out for another soldier to run up to him, starting to attend to his wounds. “See, cadets, this is how we determine your aptitude. If you are unable to read your partner’s movements, working in tandem with them instead of against - then you will never be able to pilot a Jaeger. Keep this in mind during your testing today. We’ll host a series of tests to determine who moves onto the next stage - connecting to the Drift. Pass this, and you’re almost a Pilot, cadets.” 

            Levi's chest heaves for breath as Erwin speaks, his mind still replaying the final hit over and over. He falls into line as Erwin speaks, calming his breathing. Even after all this time… Levi can hear the whispers through the crowd, and even the Jaeger kid seemed to gain a little respect for him. They whispered of being scared to go against him, of worry for the Marshal, and most of all… Why wouldn't he and Erwin just be partners, when they were clearly compatible? Damn kids. Too young to even know who we are. Only rumors…

            “Like the Marshal said,” Levi only speaks once he's gained his composure, although he still frowns when he looks at Erwin's hand. “You'll be doing what he just did against me, but I don't expect any of you to get as close. I've even given you a head start… You've seen some of my moveset. Don't let me squash you like a bug.”

            Levi gives Erwin a nod, essentially telling him to get out of his way now. I'll handle this. “Line up! Don't think against me, just do. Let it come naturally. If we're compatible, it'll happen. If not, well… Prepare to get your asses handed to you.”

—*—

            The afternoon sun leaks into Erwin’s office window as he taps his pen against the table. The aptitude testing had gone… About as well as he expected it to. Now, he was overseeing the notes he’d made of each individual cadet’s performance as they’d sparred against Levi, ruling out absolute failures and sorting out just a few mild successes. Nothing particularly stood out to him, except for potentially one cadet, but judging by Levi’s demeanor, Erwin knew it wasn’t going to be satisfying enough for him.

            Eren Jaeger showed promise, but he and Levi won’t get along in the Drift. Same goes for Jean Kirschtein, Armin Arlert, and Sasha Braus. Mikasa Ackerman… Erwin knits his brow. They shared a last name, and yet Levi had shown no recognition for Mikasa - and through some background searching, Erwin hadn’t pulled up any connections between the two of them, either. If they were related, it was distant, or their shared last names was simply a coincidence. 

            However, Mikasa had shown the most promise. She carried a number of two wins out of six rounds, which might not have been as much of a standout success as Levi wanted it to be, it was still better than her peers, who mostly reigned with a zero success rate. … At this rate, Levi will deny these recruits as his partner. 

            Erwin starts jotting down on his paper - Plan another aptitude test. He knew Levi wouldn’t be satisfied to give up immediately after this. That wasn’t Levi. No, Levi would insist on someone else being his partner, and said partner would refuse him outright. I’m in no shape to pilot a Jaeger, and… I can’t risk Levi getting killed. It’s too risky. So, technically, Erwin’s plan was working.

            He didn’t want Levi to pilot the Winged Freedom. As much as he loved the Jaeger himself, with the state of the world as it was, Erwin was not willing to let Levi pilot it himself. It was basically begging to be killed, even with Levi’s skill set. Even if I piloted with him, as I am now, I’m more of a liability than an asset for him. So, Erwin was willing to play the long game. He knew Levi was not only too standoffish, but also too stubborn to accept any other pilot except for him. Erwin wasn’t about to play into his hands.

            Erwin’s deep in his thoughts when he hears a knock at his door. It’s two knocks - precise, straightforward. Levi. He makes work to make his scoring papers not visible before he responds. “Come in.”

            Levi practically throws the door to Erwin's office open, slamming it shut behind him. It's a very different demeanor than what his knocking would have made Erwin believe. He’s fresh from the shower, his hair damp and his clothes fresh. He brings the smell of soap and clean linen with him, although his expression is anything but pleasant . 

            “What the hell was that ? You told me those Cadets were hand picked by you. That was pathetic.” Levi comes up to Erwin's desk, arms crossed. For such a small man, he could make himself look threatening. “Only one candidate is even possible , and even then it's a long shot. The rest of them are terrible. Jaeger's too cocky and stubborn. Arlert's smart, but he's a wimp. Sasha… God, don't even get me started. Mikasa's good, but she doesn't seem to want to match with me. It's like she's holding herself back, or intentionally skewing it. I can't tell if she'd actually match me or not. And, other than that, they’re all shit! You can't expect me to choose one of these people. We'll both get killed the moment we step out in a Jaeger. I’m not tarnishing Winged Freedom's name like that.”

            Erwin stares up at Levi before he sighs, shaking his head and looking back down at his papers. “They were. I didn’t anticipate any of them not being at least capable enough with you to Drift with you. Mikasa showed enough promise, but… You’re right. Something's keeping her from Drifting with you entirely,” he murmurs, tapping his pen on his chin before he looks up at Levi again. “…Levi, have you considered letting another partner duo pilot Winged Freedom? Eren and Mikasa seemed to be close - I’m sure that with enough testing, they would be able to pilot her on their own. Perhaps you’re best suited to stay here. Train the cadets to survive in the field the best way you know how to. It’s a better way to guarantee that you are still contributing to our survival, without throwing yourself on the line.”

            “... You're kidding, right?” Levi scoffs, a half-smile of complete disbelief on his face. He leans on Erwin's desk, his hands gripping the edges. “You would throw half-baked Cadets into our Jaeger?” Levi's voice takes on a deadly edge, his eyes narrowed in on Erwin. The sentiment of our Jaeger isn't lost on him. “You've truly lost your damn mind. Has all this work as the Marshal finally fried it? It certainly seems so, because you'd never even think about bringing that idea up to me if you hadn't gone stupid. ”

            Levi finds himself gripping the desk so tightly that the wood strains and creaks beneath the pressure. “Your attempts to keep me grounded aren't going to work. You know as well as I do that no one's going to satisfy me, unless they give me a connection as strong as ours. And that's not going to happen. So take that stick out of your ass and get back in the damn Jaeger with me. You already protected me once , and look what it did. I left. If you don't do this- I'll pick that damned Jaeger kid and drive myself into the ground fighting a Kaiju, and you won't be able to stop me.”

            Erwin meets Levi’s gaze with a stern one of his own. He knew that Levi was going to say something along the lines of what he did. Of course he would. All Levi cared about was the mission - and, more than likely, Erwin was the only one that could carry it out with him. He knew that all too well. But the thought of getting back in that Jaeger was both thrilling and terrifying, more so for Levi than himself. Erwin would throw himself down for the mission over and over if he needed to. He couldn’t afford losing Levi in the process. 

            “Why are you so insistent on killing yourself, Levi?” he murmurs, his voice coming out a little more vulnerable than he wanted it to. Erwin’s expression looks pained for a moment before he stands up, turning over towards the window so Levi couldn’t see him. “…Do you really think our connection is strong enough now to withstand a category four Kaiju fight? If I remember right, you left me because you didn’t want me throwing my life down for you. I lost my damn arm for you, and what did I get in return? You abandoned me when I needed you the most. What assures you that I won’t do the same now? What assures you that I want to pilot Winged Freedom with you again?” 

            “I left because I knew you'd get yourself killed for me ! If I stuck around, you'd just- Ugh !” Levi just wants to throw things and hit things and yell, frustrated beyond belief. “I know you still want to pilot with me. You wouldn't have such a vested interest in this, you wouldn't have sparred with me this morning. Why do you act like you don't ?”

            Erwin lets out a soft sigh, closing his eyes and thinking. It was clear Levi wasn’t going to let this go - not with the man’s sudden clear cut determination in him. On one end, Erwin felt touched that Levi still wanted to pilot with him. On the other hand, Erwin was a liability on the field. If there were a situation where Erwin was required to operate the right hemisphere, where he would have to compensate for his right side, he couldn’t protect Levi. Not anymore. Has Levi even fought a category four kaiju without me yet? What if we find a category five? Or worse? At this rate, he’s just asking to kill himself . Erwin couldn’t let that happen. 

            What Levi had done to him had nothing to do with Erwin piloting the Jaeger. If Erwin were a selfless man, he would have thrown himself in that Jaeger the second Levi touched ground in Tokyo. But, no. Erwin was selfish, and unfortunately for Levi, Erwin needed him alive . His expression tightens, becoming stern again. 

            “Do you have any idea what you’re asking of me, Levi?” he asks, balling his hand into a fist - and the bandages that wrap it start to turn red as he reopens his wounds from before. “As your Marshal, it is my responsibility to ensure that this Shatterdome runs smoothly and without insubordination. If I were to pilot a Jaeger, it would only be as a last resort. Do you know what would happen to this place if I were to die in the field because of my own incompetencies? Because I lost my arm saving you? The project would be canceled, and every Jaeger would be used as scrap to build the wall. And I know you don’t want that.” 

            Erwin takes in a deep breath, trying to calm down. “…Whatever power you think you hold over me, you don’t hold it now. You are under my orders, and you will follow them. I won’t hesitate to discharge you dishonorably if you disobey them,” he says, voice full of conviction. “I have given you a very capable group of cadets that will be of much better service to you on the field. Since you’re looking for a lap dog, I’m sure you can find one out of them, regardless of how the aptitude training went. In all honesty, screw the aptitude training. You know as well as I do that you sabotaged yourself just so you could pilot with me. That isn’t how this works. Those pilots have willingly given their lives to our cause, and if they die in the line of duty, it is simply them fulfilling the duty they were given.”

            Erwin turns back to Levi, and if it weren’t for the fact that Levi could so clearly see the anger in his eyes, he might have come across as the stern man that got him to be a marshal in the first place. “I put my ass out on the line so that you could continue your dream of killing the kaiju. I almost lost my position myself by arguing against the board to save this Shatterdome, and I made it worse by keeping Winged Freedom from getting scrapped. You have no right to insult me for what I’ve done, and what I am going to do. Everything that I have done has been in the better interest of humanity. Losing you in the first wave of the final battle is not an option. I can’t lose you. The world’s best Jaeger pilot cannot sacrifice himself just yet.”

            He doesn’t give him room to talk, stepping up to the desk and picking up his stack of papers on his evaluation of each recruit, slamming it down in front of Levi. “So, this is what’s going to happen. You’re going to pick a cadet from this roster, and you’re going to pilot with them. I will only Drift with you to demonstrate the importance of a connection, but after that, I don’t care if it takes months or years for you to get a strong enough connection with one of these damn cadets in order to pilot again. You will do it. I’m done pulling strings for you. Those are your orders, and you will follow them. Refuse, or sabotage this opportunity I’ve given you again, and you’re out. Against all odds, you’re standing here in front of me because I made it so. Otherwise, you would just be on the wall, wasting away on a project bound to fail. If you want this as much as I know you do, then follow your orders. Got it?” 

            “You always do this!” Levi's voice raises, higher than Erwin's commanding one, heavy with emotion. “ You always choose for me. You never, ever let me just choose. You pick for me, and expect me to just- just agree. Always. Always ! You did it back then, and you're doing it now ! This stupid Marshal position has gotten to your head. We used to be equals. ” 

            Levi angrily snatches up the papers that Erwin had slammed down in front of him, flicking through them. He pulls out paper after paper, throwing them aside, scattering them across the room, until he only has three left- and he slams those back down on Erwin's desk. The three he'd picked were Mikasa Ackerman, Eren Jaeger, and Armin Arlert. He obviously didn't like any of them, pissed that he even had to choose. That Erwin was forcing him to because he knew Levi would do anything to get back into a Jaeger, even if it meant taking on a subpar co-pilot. Even if he wanted someone else, desperately. 

            “Fine. There. Orders followed. Fuck you, Marshal.” Levi doesn't bother cleaning up the mess he'd made as he turns away from him. In fact, he gives the papers scattered across the floor a proper kick. “Are you really so stupid that you're letting your emotions fuel you now? You never used to be that way. You always did what was best for humanity. You're here preaching about how keeping me out of a Jaeger will help keep the world safe, but you're wrong. Keeping me out of one is taking away a chance for humanity to win. You know that. Keeping me grounded- it's you being selfish. You don't want to lose me. Still. Even after all these years, you still love me, don't you? You just won't let it go.”

            Levi's voice trembles as he lets the last sentence sit between them for a few moments, the silence deafening. He knows Erwin can still see right through him. He always could. So Levi steels his expression and steadies his voice, looking over his shoulder at Erwin. “If you really still loved me, Erwin, you'd get in that damn Jaeger with me tomorrow. If not… Just pick one of those stupid Cadets and call it a day. I'm going out there with someone, whether you like it or not. Even if it gets me killed. You have the power to change that. But instead, here you are, barking meaningless orders to a man who would once do anything for you. It's pathetic. ”

            Erwin stares at Levi’s back quietly, trying to focus on his breathing to calm himself down. The last thing either of them needed was for Erwin to lose his composure - and he wasn’t about to do that in a situation like this. He couldn’t lose Levi again. Not when he had him here, now, wanting him back. It was genuinely pathetic, how easy Erwin would trail behind after Levi, even after what he’d done. 

            “…You can’t do this to me, Levi,” he murmurs, his voice coming out even more desperate than he wanted it to. Erwin sits down at his desk before he leans forward, rolling the bridge of his nose in his fingers, uncaring of the mess Levi had made. “You - you’re forcing my hand. I can’t… I can’t lose you again. What if the next time something like that happens, I can’t save you? What then? We’d lose the world’s best Jaeger pilot. We’d lose our ace. I’d lose you. I’ve already done that once. I can’t…”

            “... And what about you? What if we lost you ?” Levi turns a little more towards Erwin, his expression having softened. “You always think about me, but never you. We need you.” I need you. “For once… Just consider how someone else feels.”

            “I…” Erwin winces his eyes shut, not entirely sure why he couldn’t control his emotions like he used to. Maybe because it was Levi standing in front of him, the only man capable of knocking down each and every one of his walls with just a glance. In a way, Levi was being cruel. Unfair . The man knew just how much Erwin cared, and he was exploiting that. And Erwin was letting him, despite how much he didn’t want to. Levi had that power over him, and the man knew that. 

            “…I’ve changed, Levi. What if… What if we can’t Drift like we used to? You’ve changed. I don’t even know if…” Erwin pauses, clenching his jaw before he rises to his feet again, stepping over to Levi before he grabs his wrist, pulling him with him as he leads the way out of his office and into the hallway. “…Come on. Let’s figure this out once and for all. I’m taking you to the Drift chambers.”

            Levi's eyes widen when Erwin comes up to him, tempted to rip his wrist from Erwin's hold- but he doesn't, letting Erwin drag him along until they're outside. He's quiet, not believing in Erwin at all. He won't. He'll sabotage it. I just know it.

            Still… Levi follows. It reminds him of their older days, wandering the halls and sneaking off together. When things were good, before Levi had screwed everything up. They weren't those young Cadets anymore, looking out at the world in front of them with hope against the Kaiju. When they get to the Drift chambers, Levi quietly gets geared up for it, starting to grow a little… Nervous. 

            “I haven't done this in a while. Forgive me if I'm bad.” He refuses to admit that he's only worried because it's Erwin. He'd spent so long building this moment up in his head… What if they couldn't drift together anymore? Then Levi really would have to choose one of those Cadets to join him. I don't want that to happen. I need Erwin. I shouldn't have run away… Levi pulls his helmet on, getting the machine started while Erwin finishes getting ready. The robotic voice echoes something Levi had heard time and time again, and he prepares himself to be connected to Erwin. “This is familiar, huh?”

            “You’ve always been bad at the first Drift connection, Levi,” Erwin says with a small smile as he affixes the spinal column to his suit, wincing as it snaps to him with a pop. He steps over to his side of the station, getting his suit connected with the machine before he looks over at Levi. Seeing the man in his uniform, connected, looking so… Ready, it had Erwin himself feeling nervous. What if he couldn’t be what Levi wanted him to be? He lets out a small sigh. “…I’ve missed this.”

            He starts to press some buttons on the terminal in front of him, getting his own side ready before the helmet closes down fully on his head. Erwin lets out a soft grunt, but once he’s hooked up properly, he nods over to Levi. “Okay. I’m ready whenever you are. …Are you sure you want to do this?”

            “I…” Levi meets Erwin's gaze after a moment, letting the man see into him, even if he knew he'd be in his mind in only a matter of minutes. “I'm sure.” Levi's faltering voice steadies with confidence. He gives Erwin a solid nod. “You can't tell me no if this works out, Erwin. I'll never shut up about it.”

            Levi gives him a teasing little smile before he reaches out and begins their Drift sequence, taking Erwin at his word for being ready. He grunts as he's suddenly full of his own memories and Erwin's. He feels his vision swim as he focuses on getting through it, feeling everything Erwin felt, seeing everything Erwin saw. He can feel the man in his head, too, knowing Erwin was able to tell exactly how he felt about him. The ache he held all these years for Erwin, the regret. The hopeful feeling he’d felt knowing that this could work. Why he'd left. Reasons and feelings he'd never shared with anyone else, Erwin most of all. “ Fuck …”

            And, just like how Erwin can feel him, Levi can feel Erwin. All of his fear, his uncertainty about everything that had happened since Levi had left. The heartbreak the man had felt when he did. And then… There were the good memories, flooding over both of them with surges of warmth. The first were memories of his father, rambling on and on about the world and space, and then there was his first day as a Jaeger cadet… And then there was Levi, accompanying the warmest memories he had. The first time they’d met during training, their compatibility testing, and seeing Winged Freedom for the first time… And then their final fight together. Fear, pain… And then relief. Levi was okay.

            Soon, the surge of emotion and memories washes away- and Levi can feel how steady they are together, how their minds mesh and flow as if they had never been apart. Feeling whole. Levi was overcome with emotion, eyes shining with unshed tears. It had been too long. Far, far too long.

            “ Right hemisphere, calibrated. Left hemisphere, calibrated. Drift sequence successful. ” 

            Erwin lets out a soft sigh, relishing in the feeling of being one again. It had been far too long since Erwin had stepped foot in a Jaeger - and the emotions welling over him at Levi’s memories and feelings were almost too overwhelming. Of course, even when they’d drifted before, Erwin was aware of Levi’s fondness for him, but… It seemed as if, with their distance, Levi’s feelings had grown deeper. He could read them more clearly, feeling as if the man were letting him in entirely. 

            Levi loved him. 

            “…Would you look at that?” Erwin says, his voice somewhat breathless with his amazement. He lets out a laugh, watching as his and Levi’s movements were matched perfectly. He watches him in astonishment, warmth flooding every single inch of his body. And, for the first time since Levi had gotten there, Erwin smiles. Genuinely this time, not as some sort of smirk or scoff - Erwin was ecstatic. “We did it. We did it! Look at us, Levi..! You…”

            “... We did.” Levi had kept his gaze forward as he synced with Erwin’s movements, but now he lets himself look at the man again. He doesn't hide anything from him. He'd always been one to throw too much into the Drift, but this time, he does it intentionally. He wants Erwin to know he still cares , even if he'd been a total asshole all this time. He needed him. He needed Erwin. “Did you really doubt it?”

            Erwin feels himself get overwhelmed with emotion, thus reflecting off of Levi and feeling it shot right back at him. He takes in a deep breath to relax himself before he reaches over, shutting off the connection. The second it’s safe to, Erwin pulls the plugs off of his suit and makes his way over to Levi, pulling him into his embrace, holding him tight. “… Levi. ” His voice is thick with his emotion - unspoken, but fully understood. “I… I’ve missed you. So much. Thank you. For coming back…”

            Levi misses their connection the moment it's gone, but… being held again, it's almost just as good. It's awkward, considering they're both still suited up, but Levi doesn't quite care. He knocks his helmet against Erwin’s chest plate, slipping his arms around his waist and holding him tight. “I… Thank you. Thank you for… Being willing to Drift with me again, after everything I did. Do you… get it now? Why I left? ”

            “I… I think so.” Erwin doesn’t care how Levi’s armor hurts as it digs into him - he just wants to know he was there. He stays silent for a few moments, relishing in the after effects of the Drift, Levi’s memories fresh on his mind - specifically, the way that the man had missed him just as much as Erwin had. He gently squeezes Levi’s side before he leans away, sighing softly. “…Even after this, I can’t bring myself to regret the choice that I made. Knowing why I lost you. I just… I would do that ten times over if it meant that you were okay. I’m sorry.”

            “... I knew you were going to say that.” Levi sighs softly. He can't bring himself to look up at Erwin, keeping his head down, grateful that his helmet keeps his expression hidden. He's not sure what it would look like. “Erwin… I need someone I can trust with me. I know you want me safe, but… I can't stand by and not fight. It's what I was made to do. Pushing me aside isn't going to work. I know you don't want to lose me, but… We can't afford to be selfish. It's not just about you, or me… The fate of the world is at stake. We have to make some hard decisions.”

            Levi gently pulls away. He undoes his tubes and wires before pulling off his helmet, his hair a bit of a mess. He looks up at Erwin earnestly. “I need you in that cockpit with me. But… I understand if you're not willing to. I've bared my feelings to you… I've bared everything to you. I have nothing else left to give. So… This is goodbye for now. I'm going to head back to the barracks.”

            Even though leaving is the last thing Levi wants to do, he knows it's what's right at that moment. He gives Erwin a final look before he turns on his foot and heads out of the simulator, trusting that Erwin would make the decision he deemed as right.

Chapter Text

            When the Kaiju inevitably attacked a few days later, Levi felt nervous. He had no clue who would walk into the cockpit to be his partner. Instinctually, he takes the right side. He doesn't know who is going to be his partner, but… There was still a part of him that yearned for it to be Erwin. Erwin would take the left, so Levi took the right. Obviously. It helped that he could pilot either side- if his co-pilot was better on the right, he could switch sides and be just as successful. 

            Levi's mind is a raging mess as he suits up and prepares everything in Winged Freedom, feeling more at home in her cockpit than he'd ever felt before. He readies her with an experienced ease, prepping systems and checking weapons and fuel. The engineers and mechanics had worked hard to improve everything on her and get her into working order, and he couldn't have been more satisfied. “... We've got this, girl. No matter who walks in here.”

            “You still talk to her like she's alive, huh?” Levi jumps at the familiar voice, turning around quickly. His eyes widen when he realizes it's Erwin, and he's speechless. He really…? He really came? “What, does the cat have your tongue? It's been a while since I've seen you unable to snap back at me.”

            “I, just…” Levi's mouth goes dry, and Erwin smiles , all smart and teasing. Levi clears his throat and straightens up, shaking his head. “Well, I wasn’t holding out much hope that you'd be my co-pilot, is all. You seemed pretty adamant about staying out of the cockpit. What changed your mind, then? Or are you going to make me figure it out in the Drift?”

            Erwin simply holds his smile, making sure his suit was properly affixed before he joined Levi’s side. “It’s only a category two Kaiju. We’ve dealt with plenty of those before, haven’t we? I trust us to be the most efficient in taking it out as quickly as possible,” he says, although it’s obvious he’s holding something back as he speaks with an unbound excitement. “And, besides, I don’t think you’ll be able to pilot with any of the recruits just yet. Consider this a… Test run of sorts, to see if I’m capable of going back into the field.”

            He reaches forward to start connecting himself with his side of the Drift station, quickly affixing the wires and getting himself situated. Once he’s finished, he nods over to Levi. “But… Yes. My true reason is one you’ll see in the Drift. It’s… Something I can’t say here. Or, well, something I’m incapable of finding the words for. So, are you ready?”

            “There you go, being all cryptic again. Of course I'm ready.” Levi gets the sequence started. Surely there's more to his reasoning. He wouldn't be here just because he thinks I can't drift with them… In fact, he knows I could. Still, Levi doesn't mention what he's thinking. Erwin would know soon enough. “I'll start it.”

            Levi reaches over to the control systems, initiating the Drift. It's more intense being in an actual Jaeger, but Levi's done this so many times that it comes to him as easily as breathing does. That is, until he's hit with a wave of emotion from Erwin , overwhelming him. “Nng, shit …”

            “ Pilots out of alignment. Left hemisphere calibrating. Right hemisphere out of alignment. ”

            “ Levi!” Erwin’s voice quickly cuts into Levi’s thoughts, but he can’t focus on it hard enough to distract himself from the memory. “Levi. Levi. Listen to me - you’re chasing it. Just focus on my voice. Don’t chase the RABIT. Stay with me, Levi. Levi! ”

            Levi can't pull himself out of it. He knows he's spiraling out of alignment, but he can't do a thing to stop it. He's pulled into a memory. One of Erwin, of course- the one that caused all this agony between them. 

            “It's coming for our left side! Erwin, get ready!” Levi shouts faster than he can even think. He's running on instinct by now, trusting in himself and his co-pilot. He gets prepared to intercept the beast of a category four Kaiju coming at them, compensating for Erwin's crippled right arm. They brace themselves, and Levi readies his sword. The Kaiju charges at them, but- “Shit, it's gonna-”

            Erwin reacts before Levi can. Even though the plan had been for Levi to intercept, the Kaiju leapt at them, its jaws wide and full of razor sharp teeth that were perfect for tearing through a Jaeger's hull. When Erwin reacts, it's not to do the plan. Instead, he protects the left side, throwing his arm up despite how damaged both Winged Freedom and Erwin's arm is. Erwin lets out a pained yell as he tries to push the Kaiju off. It bites through the rest of their arm, ripping it off and throwing it out into the city. Levi's helpless as the Kaiju bites down on Erwin's side of the cockpit, seeing the teeth crush into the hull. 

            “Erwin…!”

            Levi's heart rate spikes, his breathing labored. His eyes are glossy as he's still lost in the memory, Winged Freedom shuddering as he starts to react in the real world. His left arm is outstretched, Winged Freedom's blade unsheathing in response. 

            Erwin can feel the anguish that Levi felt as he sinks into the memory, and he tries not to focus on the pain himself, even as it shoots through his nonexistent arm - a phantom pain. “Levi! Don’t - ngh, you’re - the sword..! ”

            Erwin's screams of pain echo in Levi's head, and suddenly, his instincts kick back in. He focuses on the rage, the fear- pulling his arm back before jabbing it back in again and again and again- he loses track of how many times he stabs the Kaiju, it's blood bleeding blue across them. It rears its head back and screams, and Levi matches its cry of terror with a guttural yell of his own. With one final thrust, he drives the blade home into the Kaiju's heart, and the creature slumps against their Jaeger, keeping them pinned. Levi's body fails him, and his head swims as the emergency lights flash across him. Still, he looks over and- Erwin, still alive.

            “... Levi. Levi!”

            Levi gasps as he’s pulled out of the memory by Erwin's voice, the emergency signals mirroring that of the memory. As he realizes where he’s at, his eyes widen as he notices the sword he's deployed, obviously mimicking the attack he'd just done on the Kaiju in his memories. He takes a deep breath, shaking, trying to calm himself back down and align with Erwin. “I… I’m sorry. That's… That's never happened before.”

            Erwin visibly relaxes as he sees Levi get out of it, gritting his teeth as he reaches forward to the terminal, overriding the emergency shutdown protocol the Jaeger automatically put itself into. “I know. Levi, you…”

            “Right hemisphere, calibrating. Right hemisphere aligned. Neural handshake successful.”

            Erwin doesn’t find the need to finish what he was going to say - his thought translated perfectly into Levi’s mind. You were crying. He gazes at Levi in silence, letting the emotions Levi was trying to get over wash over him, accepting them fully, letting the Drift happen without protest. Once the Jaeger is in alignment with the both of them, he looks a bit more relieved.

            “What happened? ” Erwin starts, eyes flitting over to the front of the cockpit, where it showed how their sword had just narrowly missed the hangar’s wall. “You don’t usually do that. Just… Breathe. It won’t happen again. I swear it. Just relax. You’re safe with me. Can you do this, Levi?”

            “... I don't know what happened.” Levi sniffles. It takes him by surprise. Even though Erwin had told him through the Drift, he doesn't really expect to have the tears streaming down his face. I never cry . He can't reach his face through the helmet, so he just stands up a little taller, retracting the blade again. He listens to Erwin's instructions, taking several deep breaths to calm and steady himself. He lets the comfort of Erwin being there, a presence in his mind, ease himself into it again. “I think…”

            Levi swallows. He has to take a moment to sort through what happened, how he felt- he knew a Kaiju was looming on the horizon and they needed to go , but… “I wasn't ready for you to unload in the Drift. Everything you felt- it knocked me out of alignment, and I thought of- of what happened, and I got caught up in it. I'm sorry. That won't happen again.”

            Levi means it. His voice steels, and his wavering confidence steadies again. Their connection grows stronger, better , and Levi gives Erwin a nod. “I can do this. We can do this. I swear it. The world needs us, Erwin. I'll use this connection to fuel our fight. I won't slip up again.”

            “Okay.” Erwin feels better when he hears the conviction in Levi’s voice, and he gives him a nod in return - and the both of them lift the Jaeger’s arms, signifying their connection with a classic fist bump between their hands. “Let’s show this Kaiju just who it’s trying to kill.”

—*—

            Levi steels his nerves as they’re dropped from the drones carrying them out to the ocean. The Kaiju, luckily, hadn’t made it to land yet- but that meant he and Erwin were meant to intercept it in Winged Freedom. There wasn’t a guarantee as to what type of Kaiju it was, but they were lucky that it only clocked in at a category two. It would be a good warm-up for them, and to show the cadets what it was really like to fight a Kaiju.

            “So far, we’re stable. Radar shows that the Kaiju is about five miles out, slowly moving in. Probably isn’t suited for the water.” Levi nods as Erwin talks, already working together to get Winged Freedom moving. It feels like second nature to them to work in tandem, their brains so used to being wired to each other that it really felt like they were one person. It’s easy for Levi to let Erwin’s thoughts and memories flow through his own mind, and to let Erwin feel his. Connection could be both a gift and a curse when within the Drift; both of them were acutely aware of that fact. “We’re set to intercept in two minutes. Keep on pace.”

            “Got it.” They settle into an uneasy silence between each other, but not because of being together again. Even if Levi was a hardened veteran, and this was a lower level Kaiju, there was always a lingering uncertainty. They couldn’t guarantee that nothing would go wrong. There was no underestimating the threat of a Kaiju. “I’ve got a visual. It’s approaching on our left side- I think it’s spotted us. Prepare to engage!”

            Everything else, in that moment, melts away. To Levi, it’s just him, Erwin, and the Kaiju headed towards them. He feels a familiar rush of adrenaline fill his body as they set their feet, preparing as the Kaiju finally lifts its head out of the water. It reminds Levi of a dinosaur, what with the spines along its back- but he doesn’t have more than a few seconds to think before it’s crashing towards them through the water. They catch it by its head, yelling with the strain as they use the Kaiju’s momentum to send it off balance behind them. Winged Freedom turns around as quickly as it can.

            “Deploying our sword!” Erwin’s command rings out at the same time his thoughts go through Levi’s mind, and Levi is in complete sync with Erwin’s movements. He follows the flow of their thoughts like a river, instinct’s aligned. When it turns, attack. Gives us the best chance at a kill shot, looks like its back is heavily plated. Won’t have a good chance right now. Erwin speaks right into his mind, and it feels like it only takes a split second for Levi to understand. “Get ready!”

            Erwin takes the lead on this one on the left, swinging their sword right across the Kaiju’s chest. It reacts quicker than expected, diving forward and out of the way of their blade. Levi’s curses as it goes to try and get around them, but Levi manages to get them to react quicker- keeping the moment of their swing by turning their body with it. Their blade connects with the back of the kaiju, glancing off of its hardened back plates and dealing no damage at all.

            “Shit-” They quickly try to course correct as the kaiju sweeps its tail underneath their feet, catching one and sending them off balance. “Watch out, it's gonna get our-”

Before Levi can finish what he’s saying, the Kaiju had started dragging them by their leg, and Winged Freedom starts to tip backwards. With quick thinking, Erwin digs their sword into the ground and keeps them from getting pulled further off balance and into the sea- but it leaves them exposed. “Levi, ready the plasma cannon!”

            “Already on it!” Levi feels a cage of fear squeeze his chest, especially as he realizes that their plasma cannon might not charge up in time. The Kaiju kept its hold on their leg, but it was quickly realizing that it had a chance to get them. “Erwin, I’m engaging our thrusters- Lets burn this fucker.”

            Erwin can’t help but laugh despite the situation, and he works on keeping their sword engaged to keep them upright while Levi engages the thrusters. It burned energy, but at the moment it didn’t matter- it seemed to actually get through the Kaiju’s plates, making the creature scream out and let go of them with its tail. Winged Freedom strains for a moment to get itself back up. “Levi, our right leg’s damaged. Not badly- but it might give us some trouble. Be mindful.”

            “Yes, sir.” Levi aims their cannon and fires several shots, connecting with the Kaiju’s face and chest. It lets out another shrill scream as it uses its back to protect itself. “Push in while I fire- we might get a chance at its heart now. Hurry!”

            They run forward as Levi continues to fire at it, their clip running out just as they make it to the Kaiju. Erwin lifts the sword, and right as the Kaiju turns to them-

            He thrusts it right into the Kaiju’s soft chest, feeling it sink all the way to the hilt. Levi and Erwin yell in unison as they twist the blade. The Kaiju cries out and tries to claw at their arm, but it was growing weaker and weaker. They pull the blade out only to drive it home a second time, and this thrust seals the deal. The Kaiju’s body slumps and the bright color starts to fade, bleeding blue into the ocean waves. 

            Winged Freedom sheathes its blade and they take a step back. Both pilots' chests heaved with their heavy breathing before they turned to each other, wide-eyed and still full of adrenaline.

            “... We did it.” Levi manages to speak first, listening to how their comrades celebrated through their comms. He turns them off for a moment so he can speak with Erwin, feeling his barely contained excitement through the drift. “We really- really did it. How many kills is that for us now?”

            “Eleven. For Winged Freedom, at least. A new record.” Finally, Erwin lets himself smile. “More than that for you, though, isn’t it? You killed a few while you were in America.”

            “Yeah… But that doesn’t matter. Only this does, here, with you.” Levi allows himself a little smile, too. “Now c’mon, you sap. We’ve gotta get this Kaiju back to the mainland, and get Winged Freedom back for repairs. Her leg’s creaking. ”

            Erwin laughs and nods, and they both work together to grasp the Kaiju by its tail. “Yes, sir. ”

—*—

            The celebration they’d returned to was a lot more than either of them were expecting it to be - other soldiers were celebrating them and their reunion, whereas some of the Jaeger pilots, specifically the recruits, were more enthusiastic with their cheering. Erwin couldn’t help but smile at the sight of everyone so harmonious again. It made his heart swell with hope. They could do this. 

            After a few words and exchanges with the others, Erwin leads the way back to his room, knowing Levi would want some time to unwind after everything that had happened that day. Once they arrive, Erwin lets Levi inside, closing the door behind them, energy still high after the amazing fight they’d had.

            Although Levi was just as hyped up on their win, he was tired. After nearly stabbing a hole through the Shatterdome and defeating a Kaiju, he sort of just wanted to get a shower and rest. Instead, he'd decided to accept Erwin's invitation to celebrate in private, to let them both get some much needed alone time. Levi hadn't thought too much of it, being more for solitude himself, wanting to be able to calm down and relax.

            “I knew you still had it in you,” Erwin says, smiling as he heads over to a cupboard he has in his room, opening it to pull out a bottle of wine. Erwin pours them both a glass before he joins Levi’s side, handing him one of them, letting his hand linger on Levi’s for just a moment too long. “I’m proud of you. You overcame it, and we annihilated that Kaiju. I’ve missed this. So, let’s celebrate a little.”

            “You know I'm not much of a wine drinker…” Despite his small complaint, Levi takes the glass. He doesn't miss how Erwin's fingers stay longer than they need to, but… He doesn't really mind. Being back in the Drift with Erwin had brought back feelings and thoughts that Levi thought he had long buried. He didn't quite mind the closeness returning between them. He takes a small sip of the wine after swirling it, letting out a gentle hum. “I didn't expect everyone to be so… happy. I was rather sure they hated me, especially after the Drift went wrong today. I suppose defeating a Kaiju is a universal bonding moment…”

            “Mm. I’m sure they don’t hate you. You’re just…” Erwin looks Levi over before he smiles a little, teasing. “…Mm. Well, I’m confident that we’ll be convincing them towards us more and more as time goes on.” 

            Erwin takes a seat on the side of his bed, swirling the wine in his glass as he looks at his reflection… And he lets out a soft sigh. “It was nice. Piloting a Jaeger again. I’m sure you’re used to it at this point, but you know I haven’t piloted since you left,” he murmurs, taking a small sip. “This was a good reminder for me. I needed to feel that passion again - why I became a pilot in the first place. So, thank you, Levi. For being as stubborn as you are.”

            “You're welcome.” He knows Erwin's just teasing, but he takes it seriously. If he hadn't been stubborn… He wouldn't have gone out there with Erwin in that cockpit with him. “I'm glad I could reignite that for you. I think you needed it even more than I did.” Levi takes another sip of his wine, slowly inching closer to Erwin, almost like he’s trying to be sneaky. “Does this mean you're going to come back? Fully, with me?”

            Erwin dwells on Levi’s question for a moment, trying to think realistically about the situation. “…I want to. There’s just… There’s technical things that I need to clear first. I’ll never be cleared for any Kaiju fight above a category three - at least, not with our current manpower. If they need you, I might not be able to pilot for a bit. But… Yes. I want to come back,” he murmurs softly, too focused on himself to notice Levi. “There’s nothing like being in the Drift with you. I’m going to fight for it. Even if it means stepping down and handing Hange my position, if she’s willing to take it. I can dream all I want that I will lead us to victory, but… There’s no way to guarantee it without fighting in the field with you.”

            He laughs a little. “You can call it selfish, but… There’s also a part of me that doesn’t want you to find another pilot you can Drift with as well as me. If you ever replaced me, especially now that I have you back… I’d get jealous. And a jealous leader is no leader at all, is he?”

            “Erwin…” Levi downs the rest of his glass and sets it aside, now nearly nose to nose with the other man. He barely tilts his head down to be looking into Erwin's eyes, a little unused to being so close. “... be jealous. Be selfish. I don't care what it takes. They're shipping in the last of the usable Jaegers this week, and the Cadets are well into their training. We'll have the manpower soon enough to send them against the weaker Kaiju, and leave us to the stronger ones. We're the only ones who could handle that. If a category four came through the Breach…”

            “…We barely handled the last one, Levi. I just… I don’t want to be the one who sends you to your death,” Erwin murmurs, looking over at Levi. “I’d never forgive myself if something like that happened again.”

            Levi’s expression pinches. He doesn't want to think about something like that… Category twos and threes were already bad enough. The few category fours that they'd encountered had been deadly. Levi’s eyes drift to Erwin's arm as his mind conjures up the memory again, fresh from their Drift. He reaches out and gently brushes Erwin's cheek with his fingers before gaining more confidence, cupping the man's cheek. 

            “What soldier wouldn't follow his Marshal into battle, Erwin?” Levi’s voice goes soft, a tone unlike him. His eyes read as clearly as the Drift as he looks at Erwin, his fingers soft as they hold him. “Maybe you don't need to stand down. Maybe… You're exactly where you need to be, you just need to take that final leap into the unknown.”

            Erwin sighs softly, setting his glass down before reaching up and cupping Levi’s hand on his cheek. He has a point. What sort of leader would I be if I didn’t demonstrate what I was trying to lead the others into..? He squeezes Levi’s hand before he slowly pulls it off of his face, instead intertwining his fingers with his. It was warm. He wanted to cherish this feeling for as long as he had left to live. 

            “Levi…” Erwin meets Levi’s gaze, and maybe it’s the confidence still weaning off of him from their previous fight, but he can’t stop himself from leaning in closer, gently touching his forehead to Levi’s. He pauses before he pushes more, squeezing Levi’s hand tight. “…I need you, Levi. You’re… You’re the only one who can fight with me. You know that. Just… Just tell me if it isn’t okay.”

            He doesn’t wait again before he closes the distance, hand tightening even more on Levi’s as he presses his lips against his. Erwin can feel the bloom of joy in his chest, and when he doesn’t feel Levi fight back or protest, he pushes in closer, hand sliding up Levi’s arm to hold him. 

            Levi isn't too surprised when Erwin closes the distance between them. He'd secretly wanted it himself for some time now, and when Erwin gets the bravery to do it, well… Levi wasn't going to stop him. He brings his other hand up to hold Erwin, pressing in closer. He can taste the wine on the man's lips, but it doesn't make Levi pull away. He'd waited for far too long for this, and he'd enjoy it. “Erwin…” Levi whispers his name against his lips, desperate. “Nng…”

            Erwin’s confidence skyrockets when he hears Levi whine against his lips, and he pushes in closer, huffing into his mouth as he gently squeezes Levi’s arm. He trails his hand to hold onto Levi’s side, giving it another hearty squeeze, feeling on fire. He’d wanted this - dreamed of this for so long… And now that he had him, Erwin didn’t want to stop. 

            “ Levi… ” he murmurs as he pushes in even more, gently pressing Levi down and onto the bed as he kisses him. Erwin doesn’t even dare part from Levi’s lips even as he situates himself to lean over him, his hand sliding down to dig his fingers into Levi’s thigh. Heat pours through him, completely thinking with something else other than his head for once. “ Levi. ”

            Levi gasps as Erwin pushes him against the bed, truly not expecting that. He feels- claustrophobic. Even though he enjoys the kisses, Erwin's sudden switch in behavior unsettles him. He tries to follow suit, shyly sliding a hand up Erwin's side, but… His heart hammers in his chest, especially being pressed into such a vulnerable position against Erwin. His brain yells at him about how he doesn't like this, but it's Erwin and-

            His hands find Erwin's chest and he pushes, his eyes wide. For a moment, he can't believe he’d just shoved Erwin off of him, seeing Erwin's surprised expression, but… He still scrambles to get away from him, standing up. His throat feels tight. “Erwin, I…” He stands there, trembling, his expression a mix of emotion. “... I can't do this. I'm sorry.”

            As Levi turns away to flee, Erwin quickly sits up, wanting to reach out to him - but he doesn’t. Not yet. Instead, he’s stuck there, catching his breath and recovering from getting rejected. What did I do wrong..? He stares at Levi’s back, reaching up and gingerly touching his own swollen lips before he finally stands.

            “Levi, wait,” he says with a tone that comes across as a lot more vulnerable than he wanted it to. “I’m - I’m sorry. I… I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Don’t go. What happened..? Did I do something? Are you… Not wanting this? Me ?”

            Levi freezes with his hand on the door handle, hearing the underlying vulnerability in Erwin's voice. He already knows all of you, Levi. Just… tell him. “... It’s not you, Erwin.” He only half-turns back to face Erwin, still looking… Scared. “I’m not… ready. For more. You know my past. All of it. Just… not yet. Please.”

            He grimaces. Now that he's said it, and Erwin knows how he feels, Levi opens the door, ready to leave. “...I'll see you some other time, Erwin. I need a shower, and I'm tired.” He pauses, just before saying his final words and leaving. “... goodnight.”

            …Of course. That was what it was. Erwin frowns, disappointed in himself for losing control of himself. He stands up and walks over to Levi, hesitating before he gently reaches forward, brushing his fingers along his forehead, straightening his hair. “Okay. Can I walk you to your room, at least? I don’t expect anything from you. I promise.”

            “... Yeah,” Levi's voice is quiet as he agrees. He's relieved that Erwin isn't angry with him. His chest still felt tight. He didn't know how he was supposed to go to bed later, knowing that Erwin wanted him like that. It wasn't that Levi didn't feel things like that, but… He wasn't ready. He'd only just gotten Erwin again, after years of being apart. “You can walk me back.”

            When Levi agrees, Erwin visibly relaxes, but he doesn’t reach for Levi’s hand when he follows him out of his room, shutting the door behind them. The hallways are quiet, everyone presumably in the mess hall or the Shatterdome for the celebration. Erwin can hear the quiet hum of everyone talking echoing down the hallway, but he’s glad that they’re at least alone to somewhat enjoy the walk, even if it was a bit awkward and tense. 

            Once they make it to Levi’s room, Erwin makes sure to keep his distance, not wanting to push Levi’s boundaries any more than he already had that night. “…Okay. Rest up. I’ll see you tomorrow, Levi,” he murmurs, giving him a small smile. “Goodnight.”

            “Thank you.” During their short walk, Levi had calmed down a little, looking less nervous and tense than he had before. He looks up at Erwin as the man smiles down at him, and his ears turn a little red. “Yeah, I'll… See you tomorrow. Goodnight to you, too.”

            Levi lingers for only a moment longer before he slips inside his bedroom, shutting the door quickly and locking it before he can even think twice. He slides down to the floor with his head in his hands, taking a deep breath. This is going to be a long night…

            Erwin feels his heart drop when he hears the door’s lock click, and for a moment, the world stops. He can’t help but stare at Levi’s door, tensing his jaw. … I messed up. He clenches his fists before he turns and stalks down the hallway to the Shatterdome, fixing how his uniform had gotten crinkled from their previous exchange. If anything, Erwin couldn’t let himself linger on that feeling of dread. He’d pushed him too far. So, he would do the only thing he knew would make him feel better - even if it was just by distracting him. 

            …Maybe it wasn’t the healthiest thing to do, either.

Chapter Text

            Erwin’s head was pounding the morning after, ears swimming with echoes of the noises around him. Despite how shitty he felt, both inside and out, well, he still had a job to do. 

            Affixing his uniform back on after finding it haphazardly thrown on the floor after his drunken daze, Erwin tries to make himself presentable - and he succeeds mostly, except for the fact that his suit was wrinkled and he had massive bags under his eyes from a restless sleep. With a soft sigh, he opens his vanity drawer. He had something just for this. No one needed to know just how much Erwin was feeling toiled. 

            After concealing his only visible sign of weakness, Erwin accepts defeat with his uniform and heads out, walking down the hallway and briskly avoiding Levi’s door as he makes it to the Shatterdome and down to his office. The typical procedures still needed to be done, after all. He needed to draft the training program for the cadets to Drift with each other. With the new shipment of Jaegers coming in, with two today and the last three tomorrow, Erwin had to make sure that they not only had the room and maintenance they needed to work, but the pilots to drive them. 

            The hours that passed seemed like centuries to him as he worked through report after report, calling in his corporals to relay them. After he’d finished his last written assignment for the day, Erwin’s gaze avoids the picture of him and Levi on his desk as he stands again, finding his way into the main hangar Shatterdome as he hears the gates open. 

            Erwin stands on the platform as he watches the two Jaegers, Hunting Boar and Vigilant Eye, start to get loaded into their proper places. He holds his hand behind his back, looking over to his side as he’s joined by one of his fellow comrades - his closest one since Levi left.

            “Hange,” he greets her, giving her a small smile. Overseeing the Kaiju research department, she specialized in trying to find the Kaiju’s origins and weaknesses - so, obviously, she and Erwin saw each other fairly often. “Any news?”

            “Not yet, but I have a solid theory on how we can proceed with Project Exodus,” Hange says with her excited tone, glasses glinting with the reflection of the Jaegers in the Shatterdome. “I’ll need a little more time to put the theory into action. I’ll give you more details when we’re in a more… Stable environment. I wouldn’t want to spark controversy here, Marshal.”

            Erwin nods, turning his attention back towards the hangar. “Good. You’re doing good work here, Zoe. I look forward to your progress.” He can feel how Hange stares at him, analyzing him - and he knew immediately that she saw right through him. Of course, he’d play the ignorant game. “…What?”

            “Drink a little too much during the after party, Smith?” she says with a teasing smile, none the wiser to why Erwin had drank so much. She gently nudges him with her shoulder, and the motion brings a small smile to Erwin’s face - the first he’d had all day. “Ha- ha! I knew it. Getting back in that Jaeger makes you a different man, huh?”

            “…Yeah. Something like that,” Erwin says, looking back at Hange. “You look fine, though, despite the fact that I think you drank far more than any of us did last night. What’s your secret?”

            “ Gatorade .” Hange’s tone is serious, but excited - like she was giving away some sort of secret. “Personally, I prefer the Japanese Gatorade here. American Gatorade tastes too artificial.”

            Erwin hums in response, taking it into note for later. He decides to change the subject as his gaze lands on a familiar shape in the crowd below, watching as Levi pushes his way through the people, seemingly looking for someone. “So, did the Kaiju’s body from yesterday bring you anything of value?”

            “ Yes! I was hoping you’d ask. I’ll show you later, considering you have your overseeing duties, but… We managed to capture a large piece of the Kaiju’s brain, and it’s still maintaining its neural network . That’s actually what I-“

            Hange’s interrupted by a loud bang as Hunting Boar gets dropped onto the ground, standing firm in its new home for now. Erwin watches as she gazes in awe at it before she shakes her head, seemingly getting back on track and looking back at Erwin. “Later. I’ve gotta go see what that thing has equipped! That’s a Mark One, right? One of the originals?”

            “Yes. It’s one of the strongest Jaegers ever created - its rapid-fire electric missile systems are the reason it’s still standing.” Erwin’s lips twitch in amusement as he watches her eyes widen in excitement. Might as well fuel it a little more. “The development of that electric missile system was a revelation for the U.S. military. It was the reason we were able to make as efficient of an air defense system as we have now. Without the worry of having to reload missiles, it’s deadly if used correctly.”

            “ Wow. ” Hange lets out a small sigh, dreamily leaning against the railing of the platform as she gazes at the Jaeger. Erwin steps forward to join her, almost wishing he met her enthusiasm about it. Of course, it was still a feat, and it amazed him, but… With a glance over to the small sliver of Winged Freedom he could see from this angle, it was hard to beat that. He's about to open his mouth before he hears footsteps to his side, and when he looks over, he sees Levi standing there. Unlike Erwin, though, Levi didn’t even bother hiding the way his eyes betrayed his exhaustion - Didn’t sleep well either, did you? A pang of worry shoots through him, but he doesn’t linger on it.

            Or, well, he couldn’t, considering Hange straightens up and immediately makes her way over to him, sticking her hand out. “You must be General Ackerman! I’m Hange Zoe, if you remember me. I used to just be a lackey, but now I’m the lead researcher here. What you did yesterday - man, I haven’t been that excited for a Kaiju kill in forever! I just wish there was a way to preserve them… But, eh, they’re meant to kill. Anyway, nice to meetcha! Again. You should come by the lab one day. I’ll show you around.”

            “I remember you.” Levi gives a glance down at Hange's hand, debating. He ends up just sighing and taking it, giving her hand a firm shake. “You were that crazy researcher who was obsessed with finding out what made the Kaiju tick. Didn't you disregard direct orders from your superior to go out into the field to collect a fresh sample? You went out while the fight was still going. You could have gotten yourself killed.” Levi's voice and expression betrays no emotion, but as soon he's done speaking- his lips quirk up in a little smirk. “Well done. I can respect you for that. I shirk Erwin's orders all the time.”

            “ Woah. You're a fascinating one, General Ackerman!” Hange laughs, giving Levi an exaggerated shake of his hand in return. “Not to mention that you're an absolute anomaly among pilots. I'd love to study you one day…” Levi gets a little creeped out as her expression turns a little dark. “Not that I'd want to crack your skull open and look at your brain, but, you know… Some studies would be great. You’re by far our greatest specimen for a pilot we've ever had. I can't help but want to see what makes you work. ”

            “Uh… Thanks. I think I'm good, though. I have some business to talk about with the Marshal.” Levi manages to get his hand out of Hange's tight grip. He finally looks at Erwin, seeing through him just as easily as Hange did. “... Why’d you even bother trying to cover anything up? You still look like shit.” Hange's eyebrows shoot up into her hairline as Levi scoffs. “I'm here about the Cadets. They all partied too hard last night, thanks to a certain someone. Not naming names… But they're all dragging today. I gave them the morning off for training. I think they deserve a break. Can we modify the plan for this afternoon for something more… Enjoyable? I don't think they want to sit through a lecture and do more Drift training.”

            Erwin’s eyes widen when Levi catches him red handed, and he lets out a soft sigh. It isn’t worth commenting on. He looks back out towards the Shatterdome, looking around until he finds the group of cadets - and just by seeing how active they were, or, well, lack of action, he could tell they were a little antsy. He hums in thought before he straightens up. “Let’s let them out of the Shatterdome. I doubt most of them have been to Japan, let alone Tokyo. I’ll arrange a hotel to house them tonight, and they’ll have the rest of today and tomorrow to have some… Morale boosting activities.”

            His gaze flicks back over to Levi, and he smiles a little. “You should join them, Levi. I have to deal with the Jaeger delivery today and tomorrow, so I won’t be able to go. They’ll need someone dependable to make sure they don’t get lost.”

            “... You can't put someone else in charge of Jaeger delivery?” Levi scowls. He's not against going with the Cadets, but going without Erwin … That was a different story. “You deserve some sort of a break too, you know.” 

            “You know, I could handle the-”

            “Don't even think about it, Four-Eyes. You don't have the clearance for that. Probably. I don't know.” Levi just shrugs. “But… Ugh. If there's no other option, then fine. I'll take the Cadets out. But if I come back brain dead, it's all your fault, Erwin.”

            Erwin lets out a soft laugh, shaking his head. He looks over at Hange before he hums in thought. “…Well, Hange is technically a sergeant in ranking. Equal to one, at least. I’m sure I could pull some strings, if you’re willing to make sure they’re delivered properly.”

            “Yes! Please! I can do that!” Hange looks pumped, and it makes Erwin a bit more confident in her ability. “I can most definitely do that! Go and enjoy a break, Erwin. You deserve it after the fight yesterday.”

            Erwin nods a little before he looks over at Levi. “Okay. Then I’ll make the arrangements and join you and the other cadets in the hangar bay at… Five P.M. I’ll leave telling and gathering the cadets up to you, General,” he says. “Also, tell them to find their room arrangements. I wish I had the budget to get us all our own rooms, but as it stands, I’ll only be able to get dual rooms except for yours, Levi. Tell them that one of them will have to stay with me… And ask them if they have any requests for activities to do. If there’s something that requires reservations, I’ll make one. Just… No expensive food, please.”

            “A cadet, sharing a room with you? Seriously?” Levi crosses his arms, raising a brow. “Don't be stupid. Me and you can room together. I'll bunk everyone else together.” Levi flicks his eyes to Hange before he looks back at Erwin, uncrossing his arms. “I'm going to go round up the Cadets. I'll get back to you with everything they want.”

            Levi turns on his heel and stalks off again, heading right back out to where the Cadets were. Erwin and Hange can't hear what Levi says to the lot of them, but they all immediately perk up, getting excited. 

            “He's an interesting one, Erwin.” Hange pipes up again, turning to him. “I can tell he's special to you, too. Something you wanna share?”

            Erwin’s gaze stays locked on Levi, even at Hange’s teasing. He sighs as he leans back onto the railing, his expression softening as he thinks about how to answer Hange’s question. “…Of course he is. I just…” He pauses, tightening his jaw. He knew full well what he’d felt from Levi during their drift yesterday - he knew how he felt, and yet…

            “…I think I might be in over my head,” Erwin says, sighing again. It wasn’t entirely a lie. “Levi’s so… Temperamental. I never know what he wants or doesn’t want unless we’re in the Drift together. Last night, we… Well, needless to say, it didn’t end well. He locked his door on me. I just… I don’t know what he wants from me, Hange. I think this is the first time I feel as if I don’t know what to do. I can’t screw this up, but I feel like I already have. What do I do..? ”

            Hange leans onto the railing beside Erwin, quiet as the man speaks. Her eyes widened as the man spilled so much, but, well, Erwin didn’t mind telling her about it. He felt as if she was the only one who’d truly listen. He hears her click her tongue before she follows Erwin’s gaze to Levi. “Well… Have you tried asking him what he wants? Without relying on the Drift to handle the talking for you?”

            “…No. I don’t know how to bring it up without him taking it the wrong way. Knowing him, he’d think I was having second thoughts.”

            “So? You can clarify what you mean.” Hange shrugs as if it were the easiest thing in the world. “You two just need to sit down, talk, and get what you two want across. Compromise if you’re so desperate to keep him. Otherwise, all of this spinning in circles is going to kill you, Erwin. I haven’t seen you this restless since Levi originally left.”

            “…Really?” Erwin’s gaze shoots over to Hange as she says that, and when it sinks in, it’s sort of an awakening for him. Get yourself together. Be a man. He clears his throat before he nods, looking back over to Levi and the cadets. “I… Well, you’re right. I’m on edge. There’s so much at stake. The program, our jobs, the Jaegers… Our lives. If we fail, the Walls won’t hold up forever. If I step too far with Levi and end up compromising our relationship, I compromise him. He’s our best chance at keeping the program alive.”

            “He’s a grown man, Erwin,” Hange groans, drawing her hand down her face. “He can decide for himself what he wants to feel. You can’t do anything about it. So just talk to him already! Maybe being shoved in a hotel room will do you some good. You two can duke it out, make out, whatever! I hate seeing our once confident Marshal so down. You’re not like this.”

            Erwin frowns, but he falls silent as he dwells on Hange’s words… Especially when he sees Levi start to head back to them. When he meets Levi’s gaze from across the hangar, he simply narrows his gaze, unsure of how to feel, especially when Levi returns his look with one of his own as he heads up the stairs to the platform. He straightens up when the man comes back. “So?”

            “ So , they're all for it. I mean, just look at them.” Levi motions towards the group, who were suddenly as rambunctious as ever. He looks back at Erwin and Hange, looking between the two. Wonder what they talked about. “I think they need it. With the recent victory, this break will give them the moral boost they need before we shove them into these Jaegers. They figured out their rooms, too. Girls with girls and boys with boys. It's going to be insane.”

            Levi sighs, leaning against the bars himself, his back to the Jaegers. He lets his eyes shut, letting out a deep sigh. “Arlert wants to go to the ocean. Ackerman, not me, requested we go to a sushi bar. Braus just wants meat. She tried to ask for one of the expensive places, but I shut that down.” He lists off a few more requests from them all, seemingly having memorized it all already. Even though Levi pretended like he didn't care, he really seemed to. “... and that's that. What do you think? Manageable?”

            By the time Levi finishes speaking, Erwin’s rolling the bridge of his nose in his fingers. So many… He sighs, thinking about a plan of action. “…Then, we’ll stay south in Odawara. It’s close enough to where we can take the train north to downtown. There’s plenty of seafood there, and we can have somewhere there tonight for dinner. In the morning, we’ll take the train downtown and visit the districts they’re wanting to see. Afterwards, we’ll visit uptown Tokyo later on for the… Hot pot bar we used to visit when we were younger, in… Ueno.”

            He straightens up before he turns to Levi, smiling a little when he sees the way he looked - even if he wouldn’t admit it, Erwin could see that Levi seemed to have a palpable excitement. “Maybe we could even go and visit the arcade we used to frequent, too. I still need to beat you at Space Invaders.”

            “We don't have to accommodate everything that they want… But that sounds like a good plan.” Levi almost holds a hint of a smile. “I think we are too old for an arcade, Erwin. The Cadets would like it, though. I'll beat all their asses in Space Invaders myself. As for you… well, you can certainly try.”

            “Well, it seems you two already have quite the plan of action! I'm almost jealous… Kidding. You've given me the opportunity to see all these glorious Jaegers up close…!” Hange just smiles, big, pushing up from the bars. “Alright! I'll leave you two to talk, then! I left my assistant Moblit alone in the lab… He's probably losing his mind there. But stop by sometime, seriously! Both of you. I've got important things cooking up that I'd like you both to see.”

            “Sure, we will. After this break, probably.” Levi nods, giving a little wave as she finally takes her leave. When she's clearly out of earshot, Levi narrows his eyes at Erwin. “She's weird. What kind of company do you keep now?”

            Erwin watches Hange go before he looks over at Levi, and he lets out a soft laugh. “Well, sometimes you have to put up with the weird to find someone worth investing in. Hange’s good. I’d argue she’s just as important as you are in our fight to keep this program alive. She’s done good work. It was her discovery that led to the efficiency of Kaiju disaster cleanup and body preservation, by the way.”

            He shakes his head, leaning against the railing beside Levi the same way he was. “Besides, her rambles are quite interesting to listen to. She’s one of the smartest people I’ve ever met. Mm… Anyway, thank you for talking to the Cadets. I’ll take care of everything else, so… You should go and rest before we leave.”

            “I didn't say she was bad , just weird, and maybe a little crazy. But you sort of need to be a little messed up to be in all this.” Levi turns his gaze from the floor back to Erwin, clear, so Erwin can see that Levi wants to look at him. “If anyone should rest, it's you. I wasn't kidding when I said you looked like shit. I can handle your other duties you need to do, or whatever, and keep an eye on the Cadets until this afternoon. Go take a damn nap or something.”

            “I can rest later.” Erwin dismisses Levi’s worries. “I’ll need to book the hotel rooms for us… And a proper ride, too. Once I’ve finished organizing everything, I’ll consider resting if I can. You look worse than I do, Levi. The cadets can watch themselves, and Hange can handle the Jaeger project for now. Will you please just rest for me?”

            “Erwin…” Levi just sighs. He can tell that this was something Erwin wasn't going to budge on. “Fine. I'll go rest. But I want you to delegate as much as you can to someone else, and take a break once you finish anything else that's left over. If you're going to be an asshole about me resting, then I’m doing the same to you.” It's my fault, anyhow. “Okay?”

            “…Okay.” Erwin watches Levi for a moment before he tries to give him a small smile, hoping it would reassure him. “I’ll… Have someone do the reservations for me. The only thing I have to do that only I can do is a write up delegating the arrival of the Jaegers to Hange.” He pauses, as if he wants to ask Levi something, before he thinks otherwise. “…Well, I suppose I’ll be resting shortly after you do. May I walk you back to your room? …You’ve eaten lunch, right?”

            “Mm.” Levi's expression scrunches. “I'm not hungry, so I suppose you can walk me to my room, if you're so insistent on being by my side all the time today.”

            “I…” Erwin was about to protest, ready to change his mind at Levi’s words, but… He doesn’t. He straightens up, frowning just a little. “…okay.”

            Levi pushes off and stands back up, brushing his clothing off. His eyes return to the Cadets before he turns away and starts heading to leave the hangar, completely expecting Erwin to follow him. The air between them held a new tension, one that had faded for a bit but had now returned after the mishap the night before. Levi… Felt bad about it. He didn’t mean to react the way he had, but pushing Erwin away had been instinct. He just hoped that it hadn't ruined things between them.

            Of course, Erwin follows after Levi like some loyal dog, quiet as they make their way down the hall. It reminded him just as it did last night, and Erwin didn’t like it. The air was palpable between the two of them, and as much as Erwin longed to try and find out why, he just… Couldn’t. Not yet. Don’t ruin the trip for him. 

            Once they arrive at Levi’s door, it’s practically a repeat of the night before - Erwin keeps his distance, hovering nearby. “…Okay. You’ll actually try and sleep, won’t you? You’ll need it once we have the cadets with us.”

            “... Yeah, I will.” Levi drops his facade just a little now that it was just them , showing his exhaustion and worry just a little more. “I'm still tired. I'm just like you… I didn't sleep very well after last night.” Levi pauses. He's quite aware of how their situation matches the one from the night before. He looks at how far Erwin is, giving a little sigh. “... I'm sorry about how I reacted last night. I was overwhelmed. I shouldn't have pushed you away, but it's what I needed at that moment. I don't hold anything against you. I hope you don't hold anything against me, either.”

            Erwin isn’t expecting an apology from Levi, but once he sees his expression, and the guilt… He takes a step forward, reaching forward to gently hold one of Levi’s hands, even though it’s just by a finger. “…You don’t need to apologize to me, Levi,” he murmurs, his defense dropping just as Levi’s had. It was obvious that he was tired, and that he’d been tense for a while. “I’d never hold something against you for doing something like that. If you don’t want me like that, then you don’t. I would never want to do something to you that you didn’t want, nor would I feel angry at you for turning me down.”

            He smiles, drawing his thumb over Levi’s hand before he withdraws again. “…I’m sorry for pushing you like that, too. I should have thought about - about you… About what you would think. I wasn’t thinking with my actual head, if you couldn’t tell. I… Got distracted.” Erwin swallows thickly. “So, I’m sorry. I won’t do something like that again. So… Rest easy now, okay?”

            “I do want you like that.” Levi says it quicker than he can truly think about it, but it's true. His hand still tingles from Erwin's lingering touch. “I just wasn't ready last night. It was sudden, unexpected… I didn't think it would happen. If I went into it a little more prepared, I wouldn't have freaked out like I did. Yesterday… Was a lot.”

            Levi lets out another sigh. He almost misses Erwin's closeness already. “But… Yeah, I'm going to try and get some rest now. For real this time. I'll see you at five, then?”

            Erwin tries to hamper down the fast beating in his chest at Levi’s words, trying not to think about what he said too much. Already, just from his reassurances, the man looked visibly better. He gives him another smile before he looks around, checking the hallway for people. Once he’s assured it’s clear, he takes a step forward, hand finding the side of Levi’s head and leaning in, gently kissing the top of his head.

            “I’ll see you at five, Levi. Sleep well.” Erwin lingers close for a moment before he pulls away, brushing his thumb over his cheek. He’s silent as he gazes down at him, and once he realizes he was staring, he pulls away officially, turning and hurrying down the hallway before Levi could see how red he was. 

            Levi's almost glad that Erwin scampers away, because Erwin's gentle actions had left Levi with a red face of his own. He glances down the hall and then hurries into his room, the loud thud of the door closing echoing down the empty hall.

—*—

            Levi actually did get some sleep this time. With the weight of the night before lifted off his chest and the exhaustion setting in, Levi finally got a nap in, curled up in his bunk. When it was time to get up and get ready, he dragged himself out of bed and got a quick shower and changed, already dreading having to spend a few days with people half his age. At least Erwin's going to be there. Levi gets a bit more of a pep in his step at that.

            Sometime in the night before, Levi had taken out the photo and jacket he’d stuffed away previously. He’d pinned the photo back up in the center, and now he shrugged the jacket onto his shoulders, over the slim-fitting turtleneck he'd chosen for the time. His bags were easily packed despite his tendency to over prepare, and soon enough he was waiting out for all the Cadets and Erwin to join him. Armin was there early, along with Annie and Reiner. It didn't surprise him. He expected Eren to be late unless Mikasa dragged him out, and he knew Bertholt had a tendency to oversleep. 

            Erwin, though… As more time passed, the more concerned Levi got that maybe he'd changed his mind on coming. If even Eren beats him here … Still, he held out faith. As more of the Cadets rolled in, happy chatter started to spark between them all. Levi still stood a little off to the side, letting their excitement build up. It wasn't often that they got this opportunity, after all. He didn't want to ruin it for them. They deserved something to enjoy.

            But, thankfully, as soon as the clock hit 5:00 PM, Erwin strides into the shatterdome, wearing his own jacket, as well. Beside him, though, surprisingly, is Eren. He’s talking to the boy as they walk in together, a few choice words making their way to Levi across the dome. It seems like Erwin’s talking to him about responsibility, to which Eren seems mildly annoyed, and he’s about to protest Erwin’s words, but he shuts up the second he makes eye contact with Levi.

             Erwin’s eyes widen when he sees Levi, but his expression quickly melts into a warm one. Once they approach the group, Erwin gently pats Eren’s shoulder, dismissing him before he turns his attention to Levi. “I told you I’d be here by five. I was hoping to be here early, but I noticed a few cadets running late in the barracks. Mikasa’s excused to be a bit late, though. She’s packing Eren’s things for him.”

            “That's pathetic. Mikasa shouldn't have to do anything for him, but he's an idiot…” Levi sighs. He pushes off the wall and stands up, joining Erwin's side now. “I was beginning to worry you weren't going to show up.”

            Erwin turns his attention to the other cadets, who all seemed to look at him eagerly. With each of them wearing their own clothes, it was easy to see their personalities more clearly. Armin was wearing something more modest, alongside Annie, whereas Sasha and Connie both prioritized comfort - and Jean looked as if he were wearing some sort of name brand clothing. Erwin snorts before he looks back at Levi.

            ”I’m glad we had the same idea,” he says, gesturing to Levi’s coat before he reaches forward, fingers brushing along the Winged Freedom emblem on his shoulder. Levi moves just a little closer. “I’m planning on giving the other cadets their jackets tonight after dinner. Their numbers in their training yesterday was more than exemplary, and we have Jaegers that need pilots. Of course, more training is necessary, but… As you said, it’s good to raise morale.”

            Erwin gestures to Connie and Sasha - the first pair, if it wasn’t obvious by how they were always next to each other. “With Sasha’s skills in her marksmanship and Connie’s smarts, I think they’re best suited for Hunting Boar,” he says before he gestures to Eren and Mikasa. “As for Eren and Mikasa, I’m going to place them in Great Discovery, which should be coming tomorrow. As a Mark Five, it should give them the tools they need to make up for each other’s weaknesses… As well as preventing any nuclear disaster, should Eren decide to become erratic.”

            He goes on to explain his other choices - Reiner and Bertholdt for Dawn Breaker due to its sheer bulk, Armin and Annie for Vigilant Eye due to the agility and recon equipment, and Jean and Marco for Delta Rider, which would let them keep up just as well as the others. “I’ve had their names and insignias printed on their jackets earlier. I was planning on giving them their jackets at their official induction, but I think tonight is as good of a time as any. What do you think?”

            “I think that'll be a good idea, Erwin. I didn't realize you'd already assigned them all. I know I helped provide the info, but still…” Levi shrugs. “They'll be excited to get their jackets, that's for sure. It's like… They've really made it.” 

            “That’s what I’m hoping for. I might have made the assignments spontaneously earlier today, but… I think each Jaeger fits their fighting styles accordingly. The only one I’m truly worried about is Eren and Mikasa - specifically Eren. He’s a bit unstable in the Drift. Chases the RABIT,” Erwin smiles a little, gently nudging Levi. “Once he gets used to it, though, I’m confident he’ll be one of the strongest cadets here.”

            “Mm. You're a dick.” Levi turns to Erwin now, looking him over, and moving on. “Funny we both decided to wear our jackets, huh? When was the last time you wore yours? Looks pretty… pristine.”

            Erwin wasn’t expecting that question from Levi, and when he asks him the question, he laughs, reaching up and gently scratching his cheek. “I… Haven’t worn it since I stopped piloting Winged Freedom. I made sure it was in good condition. I kept it in my closet, in a box of my old things, once I moved out of our room.” 

            He looks over to Levi, raising an eyebrow. “Are you sure you’ll be wanting to room with me? I’m alright with staying with some of the cadets if you want your privacy. I know you’ll probably need it after the day we’re going to have,” he says, resisting the urge to reach over and fix Levi’s jacket. “I only reserved enough doubles for them, and then a single bed. If you stay with me, we’ll have to share… Or make the cadets share. I don't think they’d be too privy for that.” 

            “Mm. And you were thinking of me when you reserved the single, huh? Always the gentleman…” Levi lets out a little sigh. He seems to notice what's wrong with his jacket a moment later, smoothing down the collar with an annoyed look. His jacket looked worn and used, mostly from how much trouble he'd gotten into while wearing it, and how it had sat in his room for so long, abandoned. “We can share the single bed. As long as you don't try and pull something like last night on me, that is.” Now it's Levi's turn to give Erwin a teasing jab, hoping that it wasn't too soon to joke about things. “It won't kill me to spend more time with you. We used to sleep in the same bed all the time…”

            Levi fades off as Mikasa finally joins the rest of the Cadets. “Mm. Guess it's time to do my job. Cadets, round up!” Levi steps out and shouts over the group, pleased as they all immediately heed his order. They all gather close, bags in hand, ready to go. “We're boarding a shuttle that's going to take us to our hotel for the night. We'll get settled in, and then I'll come by to make sure everyone knows the plan for tomorrow morning. Get your bags together and follow me and the Marshal out.”

            “Yes, sir!” Levi nods and turns back to Erwin, picking up both Erwin's and his own bag as he goes. He doesn't even stop to say anything, just leading the way out. He knew they'd all follow, Erwin included. 

            Erwin lets out a soft sigh, watching the group go before he, of course, follows after them diligently. They make their way out to the front side of the Shatterdome, where their shuttle was waiting for them. He watches Levi bark off seating arrangements as he joins his side, helping load the suitcases into the trunk of the shuttle. Ironically enough, the seating arrangements reflect the room arrangements for the hotel, and Erwin has to resist the urge to smile when he sees Eren and Jean visibly grow angry when they realize they were sharing a room - and, ultimately, sitting next to each other during the two-hour drive. Intentional. They must learn to get along. Once the cadets are loaded up, Erwin and Levi are the last to board, taking the last mini half-row at the front of the shuttle. With Erwin taking the inner side of the row, it leaves Levi with not much choice except to press against Erwin’s side.

            With a tap on the driver’s shoulder, the doors close and the shuttle’s off - but not until after Erwin makes sure everyone has their seatbelts on. Once they’re on the road, Erwin relaxes, trying to press in closer to the window to give Levi some more room. “…Sorry. I didn’t want to squeeze you in here. Are you comfortable?”

            Levi's practically perched on the edge of the seat, definitely anything but comfortable. “No.” At least he's honest. “I would move closer, but then the Cadets would talk. They're already suspicious. I don't want them to think less of you because you're close with me. You're their Marshal. You need to have authority over them, whether you want them to like you or not.”

            Erwin can’t help the snort that escapes him at Levi’s words. “What, do you think they’ll think of me any less because you’re sitting next to me on the last, tiny row?” he asks, slipping his arm around Levi’s waist and pulling him in against him, until he was properly on the seat. “Mm. There. Besides, we have a few hours ahead of us here. If you fall off of the bench because of my broadness, then that’s an issue.”

            “Wha- hey !” Levi flushes when Erwin pulls him in close, hissing the words out. He hates that he likes the display. He crosses his arms and tries not to think about how Erwin's arm lingers on his waist, feeling like everyone might be watching them now.

            Erwin smiles over at him, and thanks to the fact that no one was sat beside them, Erwin feels confident enough to keep his arm where it is, keeping Levi planted at his side. “Unless you’re really just not wanting to sit next to me? You won’t be able to share a bed with me at this rate.”

            “I'm fine with sitting next to you, I just think that kids talk , and we've got an entire bus full of kids. ” Levi pointedly keeps his eyes away from Erwin. “What, you want everyone to know that there's… More between us? Really? I would have thought you'd want to keep this under wraps.” Levi gives Erwin a glance, but he quickly looks away, hands tightening on his own arms. “It's not very… official.”

            “Well… I’m their Marshal. Even if they talk about us, if you’re wanting to keep it hidden, accusing me would put them at risk of their dreams,” Erwin murmurs, careful that Levi was the only one who could hear, even going so far as to lean down close to his ear. “It’s not as if there’s anywhere else for you to sit, anyway. If they do accuse us, then I’ll simply say I insisted. We’re partners. You’ve seen inside my mind, and I yours. I think it’s okay for us to be close.”

            His lips twitch in amusement as he leans away, gently squeezing Levi’s hip before he withdraws his arm, abiding by Levi’s wishes. “I’ll make you official in a heartbeat if it means you’re off limits for everyone else. You’re my partner. No one else’s. And, besides… The program might end soon. There’s nothing wrong with a little risk, is there? I thought you of all people would understand that, Levi.” He’s intentionally egging him on, hoping to rouse some of Levi’s boldness. “I’ll be more careful.”

            Well… Levi falls for it- hook, line, and sinker. His expression narrows as he immediately sinks back into Erwin, wanting to continue being held. “Of course I know there's nothing wrong with a little risk. I'm just amazed that you are okay with some risk, Mr. Conservative. Usually I have to be the one convincing you to do anything. You're just trying to prod the bear right now, aren't you?”

            Erwin smiles as Levi voluntarily presses back in, and he slips his arm right back where it was before. “Maybe I am. We haven’t gone for an outing like this in a while… Maybe it has me feeling a bit excited. I’d like to enjoy it the way I want to.”

            Meanwhile, behind them, the Cadets had, unfortunately, caught on. Well, some of them had. There were hushed whispers shared between several of them, staring at Erwin and Levi as they gossiped. 

            “So… I’m not crazy, right? Something's gotta be going on between them.” Connie's eyes are wide as he whispers, prodding Jean in his side. “I mean, we all see it. Right? Right? I’m not just bein’ stupid?”

            “You're always stupid, Connie.” It's Mikasa who deadpans this time. “But I think you're right. Just this once. Something's going on between Marshal Smith and General Ackerman. There's been a lot of tension. And look at them… sitting so closely. It's unlike the General.”

            All of the Cadets fall quiet for a moment as they look at the two sharing quiet words together. The person to break the silence is Eren, shaking his head as he crosses his arms. “There's no way. You really think the Marshal can get that stick out of his ass long enough to actually have a relationship ? And General Ackerman… He's just an asshole. There's just no way, I'm telling you. Are we seriously looking at the same two people?”

            “Just because your dumb ass can’t get a girlfriend doesn’t mean no one else can't, Jaeger.” Jean smirks, and Eren immediately growls. “What? It's the truth! I'm sure there's lots we don't see with those two. Not everyone's as hopeless as you.”

            “You're not entirely wrong, Jean…” Armin quietly pipes up as Mikasa holds Eren back from jumping Jean, who looks a little surprised that someone's agreeing with him. “They've known each other a long time, that much is clear. I did some research, and… They're the original pilots of Winged Freedom. Like, when it was first built. It's no wonder they're so close. Something must have happened, though… I couldn't find any official records other than the ones of General Ackerman's sudden transfer, but three years ago he left the Tokyo Shatterdome and went to America. It's just… There's some history there.”

            The rest of the Cadets are silent for a few moments. “... You're seriously messed up, Armin.” Reiner stares at him, voicing what everyone else was thinking. “You really researched all of that? I mean… I guess it's cool to know that they're real veterans, but… Maybe we should stop speculating about things. If General Ackerman finds out, he'll have our heads.”

            “If General Ackerman finds out what? ” Levi turns around and faces the Cadets, and if looks could kill, they'd all be dead. “I hope you're not all hiding something from me.”

            “N-No, sir! Not at all!” Eren's the one who is quick to apologize. “We're just messing around. I swear.”

            “Mhm.” Levi gives them one last look before he turns back around. The Cadets all breathe a sigh of relief. “I told you they were going to gossip. Did you hear them back there? I only heard part of it…”

            Erwin snickers, trying not to laugh, but he shakes his head. “I heard most of it. It’s good, though. Talking with each other like that is good for them. I’d rather have them as friends than as cutthroat enemies. You’ve seen how the other Jaeger pilots our age were… And I’m convinced that it was their arrogance that got them killed. Let them think we’re together.”

            He pauses for a moment before he leans in even closer to Levi, hearing a small gasp from someone behind them. “What’s the worst that can happen? One of them reports us to my boss, I get pulled into a meeting… and I explain how it’s a misunderstanding. Or I brag about having you, since there’s nothing in the handbooks about cross-pilot relationships. It’s better to have one to enforce the Drift.”

            Levi slowly starts to turn red. He's so close to Erwin now, and his words echo around Levi’s mind. “... You’re not the type of man to brag, Erwin. I seriously doubt that's the avenue you would take. You'd trick them into thinking we're just close friends from years ago, and nothing more.” For some reason, Levi feels bitter about that thought. “They’d believe you in a heartbeat, even if the Cadets would still speculate.”

            “Maybe they would. My track record is perfect. But… Mm. Like I said, the program might get shut down soon, so… I doubt they’ll be able to find another marshal as good as I am if they end up thinking what we have is a detriment,” Erwin says, smiling a little. “I’d feel dishonest if I lied about us. So… I suppose we should try our best to make sure none of the cadets get solid grounds for suspicion rather than gossip. ”

            Erwin straightens up, moving over to lean against the window, sighing softly. “…It’s such a shame, though,” he says softly, genuinely sounding somewhat longing. “I don’t want you to be unable to pilot Winged Freedom, so I’ll control myself for now.”

            “... Whatever.” Levi misses him as soon as he's gone. He's not used to this feeling at all . It was manageable when he was alone, at least. Erwin was far away, it was easy to miss him, but not long for him. Levi could throw himself into his training and pretend everything was just fine. But… Here, Erwin was so close. Their knees were still touching, even if Erwin had leaned away. He could miss him even while they were right next to each other. Levi bites his tongue. Maybe I could… He cuts the idea off before he can finish it. He just huffs and crosses his arms, perched there on the end of the seat.

            Some time passes between the two, and about halfway through the trip, Levi had managed to fall asleep. He's still sitting perfectly upright, arms and ankles crossed. His head is angled down, and his breathing is quiet and soft as he napped. By now he was beginning to sway, on the precipice of tipping over and waking himself up. It's still sort of an amazing sight to see the man sleeping completely upright, like he'd done it a million times before- and, really, he had. 

            Erwin had been leaning against the window, eyes watching the scenery drift by as they sped down the roads. He turns his attention to Levi when he feels him sway against his side, smiling a little when he sees him fast asleep. He gives a quick glance behind them - mostly everyone was asleep, too, except for Mikasa, who was looking at the window like he was. With a new confirmation, he gently scoots just a little closer to Levi, his arm finding his waist again to keep him from falling. 

            What he doesn’t expect, though, is Levi falling against him. He’d seen the man sleep upright numerous times, but never did he actually tip. Erwin’s eyes widen as Levi’s head lands against his side, and he can see how the man visibly relaxes. His lips twitch in amusement, but he doesn’t dare move. Levi needed his sleep after all, so Erwin decided to keep it quiet for now. If he woke up and saw himself like that later, well, that’s a problem for later. He gently leans his head against Levi’s, closing his eyes - not falling asleep, but more so just enjoying the contact. 

            …And, eventually, later did happen. After an announcement from the driver that they were about five minutes out, which woke mostly everyone up, except for Levi. Erwin straightens up, sighing softly before he gently squeezes Levi’s hip, giving him a shake. “Levi. It’s time to wake up. We’re almost at the hotel.”

            “Mm…?” It takes Levi a moment to wake up, which was pretty unusual for him. When he realizes where he's at, he sits up straight immediately. There might have even been a hint of a blush on his cheeks, but it's hard to tell in the afternoon light. “... We're never talking about this again.” Levi's voice is serious, flat- and maybe a little bit embarrassed. “Quit- Quit smiling at me like that..!”

            “Sorry,” Erwin says, but he doesn’t quit smiling at all. He reaches forward to fix a stray hair of Levi’s, sticking out of his head as a sure sign that Levi had slept well. “You just seemed comfortable. I didn’t want to move you.”

            Erwin’s attention is pulled to the front of the bus once they pull into the offloading area of the hotel, and once the driver puts the bus into park, Erwin gently squeezes Levi’s side before he stands up, looking over towards everyone in the back. “Okay! Everyone, please come down the aisle in a single file line and exit the van. Grab your things from the trunk and meet us inside of the lobby. I’ll get us checked into our rooms. Stay together, or you won’t get your room keys.”

            After a dutiful yes sir, Erwin follows Levi’s lead out of the van. “Keep an eye on them and make sure they don’t wander,” he says to Levi, and before confirming none of them were looking through the van windows, he leans over to gently squeeze Levi’s hand before he heads inside the hotel. 

            “You know I will.” Levi says it hotly, still embarrassed… And trying to get used to sharing affection with Erwin again. He held the hand Erwin had squeezed to his chest as the Cadets joined him off the bus. They filed out like they were told, sticking in a group. He keeps his eye on them regardless, ignoring how they teased him for falling asleep against Erwin on the bus. “Oh, just can it. I’ll give you all demerits if you’re not careful.”

            “You can't just give us demerits ‘cus we're teasing you, General.” Jean laughs, and some of the other Cadets nod along with his words. “You're not allowed to just throw them around like that.”

            “That's true… But I've told you all to stop. Or should I count this as insubordination against your superior officer?” Levi raises a brow as he looks at them, his arms crossed. The Cadets all fall quiet again, grumbling. “Connie, stop trying to sneak off. That really will get you in trouble. If we lose any of you, you're all never leaving the Shatterdome ever again.”

            “What’s this about insubordination?” Erwin’s voice pipes in as he comes back out, a small stack of hotel keycards in his hand. His lips twitch with amusement as his gaze flicks between Levi and the cadets, and he lets out a soft sigh. “Your general’s right. This outing is a privilege, not a given. If you behave, you’ll have more of a chance to go on another. Respect each other, respect us, and respect your surroundings. Is that understood?”

            “Yes, sir!”

            “Good.” Erwin smiles genuinely, stepping forward. “Each pair will get a room key. Keep up with it, or you’re expected to pay for the replacement. Your numbers should be on each. I trust you all have gotten acquainted with your room partners. Bring your things to your room and get settled in. The next shuttle leaves for dinner in an hour.”

            He turns over to Levi as the cadets start to disperse into the hotel, their excitement rather contagious. Erwin’s brow quips. “Come on. That goes for you, too, General, ” he says in a teasing tone as he hands Levi his hotel key. His hand lingers for a moment longer than it should before he rounds the van, going in and pulling out Levi’s trunk, handing it to him before he gets his own bag. “I was thinking… After we bring our things upstairs, maybe we could spend some time in the hotel bar? Unless you’re looking to finish your nap in the meantime. We’ll probably be out late tonight.”

            “You know I don't drink.” Levi's mind lingers on how Erwin's hand had touched his, embarrassed by how easily it affects him now. You're not a child. He holds his luggage tighter, waiting for Erwin. “But it beats trying to sleep, so I suppose I'll join you anyway. I'm sure I could get a soda.”

            “Mm… Alright. If you’re sure,” Erwin says warmly. “I’ll pay for your soda if you accompany me. I don’t particularly want a drink, either, but I’d like to find some snacks to eat before we head out into the city. I’ve been awfully peckish today.”

            When Erwin has his luggage and says goodbye to the driver, Levi leads the way into the hotel. From what he could tell, the Cadets had listened and all went to their rooms like instructed. It takes a little less burden off of Levi’s shoulders- he'd only have to worry about wrangling them back together in an hour. I'm sure Erwin will just laugh at me while I try. He doesn't wait to get their room open, holding the door for Erwin to bring his luggage in. Just like Erwin said, there was only a single queen bed in the room, meant for the two men to share. 

            “This isn't so bad.” Levi goes to the further side and sets his luggage down, already getting to work unpacking it, wordlessly. He tosses a few things onto the bed- a sleeping mask, his charger, and then what looked to be a worn-down stuffed animal. Its fur was faded, but it was clear it had been taken care of. It was a deer, and the antlers were all floppy and barely stood up. Levi brought it with him everywhere he went, and he leaves it there as he goes to put his things away in the bathroom. “Let me know if you need help unpacking.”

            Erwin walks over to set his luggage down in the small closet available in the room, getting to work hanging up his outfits and properly sorting them based on color. It’s a bit difficult thanks to his disability, but he powers through, wanting to do it by himself. He glances over at Levi as he walks into the bathroom. “I’m alright, but you let me know, too,” he murmurs before his eyes catch on the deer plushie. …Is that..? Memories flooded back into his focus of a time he’d spent too long trying to forget. A night of celebration, a shared cab, a very convenient carnival, and one too many shared whispers later…

Chapter Text

            “Hey, do you really think this is a good idea?” Erwin murmurs in Miche’s ear, his squadmate walking beside him as he and the other Jaeger pilots walk through the entrance to what looked to be a carnival. Bright, multi-colored LED lights lit up the streets and tents, and the sounds of rides, chatter, and games echoed in Erwin’s ears. They usually didn’t go for outings like this - but thanks to their victory earlier in the day against a category three Kaiju, the brass had approved the pilots to go on a little “victory jaunt”, as they’d put it. Erwin didn’t know exactly what the guidelines were for this jaunt, but he was sure that a carnival wasn’t exactly what they were thinking. “Maybe we should find someplace else. We’ll get in trouble if they find out how much money we’re going to spend here.”

            “Oh, relax, Smith,” Nanaba, Miche’s copilot, comes up beside them, clapping Erwin on his back. “This’ll be fun! And, besides, they said it’d be a good bonding exercise for us and our copilots. It’ll probably be easier for us if we split up in pairs and tackle this place head-on, anyway. A crowd as big as us isn’t gonna get through this crowd that easily.”

            Erwin’s about to respond before Nanaba hooks her arm around Miche’s, pulling him away. It seems like everyone else is following her idea, too, finding their copilots and disappearing before Erwin could even talk to them. All that leaves him now is Levi, who looks absolutely mortified to be here. He gives him a small, awkward smile before he steps over to him. 

            “...Look, we don’t have to stay here. We could sneak away and go somewhere else. I’ll text Miche to let us know where they are afterwards so we can reconvene. It’s… Loud here,” he notes, seeing how Levi seems to bristle every time a distant bell is rung, presumably from a strength test game. “What do you think? Either way, we’re tackling it together, it seems like.”

            “I'm fine, there's just a lot of people here. Wouldn't even know if a Kaiju suddenly attacked…” Levi has his arms crossed tightly across his body, and he moves to stand a little closer to Erwin- seeking solace in the person he was closest to in this sea of strangers. “Have you ever been to one of these things? I haven't. I don't know where to go. I don't exactly have the money to spend, either…”

            “I have,” Erwin says, although he can’t help but wonder why exactly Levi was insisting on staying - he had a feeling it was because he didn’t want to be the only one not staying in the carnival. He smiles a little at the thought. “I’ll pay for you, then. I think you’ll have fun. There’s plenty of things for us to do.”

            Levi worries his bottom lip, narrowing his eyes when someone bumps against him, even when they're just standing around. I'm not tall enough for this shit. He eyes Erwin, who was practically towering above everyone else, and slips behind him. “Use your height to your advantage, blondie. Lead the way.”

             Erwin snorts at Levi’s teasing, but before he can think too deeply about it, he reaches behind him, motioning for Levi. “Take my hand, then. I don’t want to lose you in this crowd, height and all.”

             When Levi obliges, Erwin starts to weave through the crowd, ever the expert when it comes to navigating around people. He gets them past the first crowd, which seems to be the biggest, deciding to start near the back of the carnival to give Levi some time to unwind. It was hard to do it here, where a guy such as Erwin couldn’t help but bump shoulders with other people as they passed, but… He was at least glad that his size defended Levi from experiencing it. 

              It doesn’t take long for them to find a booth Erwin found interesting near the back - a simple merchant booth, but it seemed like the owner was selling little animals made out of… What looked to be bean bags. “Mm. These are cute. What do you think? Does this one remind you of me?” he asks as he holds up a yellow giraffe, laughing. “Tall and blonde. Just what you hate about me.”

            “I never said I hated those things, just that it's a constant annoyance. You stand out like a sore thumb in Tokyo, dumbass. Humongous, tan, blonde… You're nearly the exact opposite of everyone in this country. They all gawk. ” Levi rolls his eyes, although he does take the time to pick through the toys. Isabel would have liked this one. He lingers on a brown horse, running his thumb over its nose before he draws away again, raising a brow at Erwin- who still held the giraffe. “Are you going to get it? It is fitting. Maybe I should start calling you giraffe .”

             Erwin snorts, shaking his head. “No. I’m just admiring it. It’d be pretty self-centered of me to buy it for me. But, mm… Maybe I’d get this one,” he says, picking up one of a small black cat. He smiles a little as he sees it before turning to Levi. “This one reminds me of you. Isn’t it cute? I like the eyes.” 

             “Me?” Levi considers it, looking it over. Cute ? He'd argue that it was scraggly, but… Maybe there was some charm to it. He tilts his head, brows furrowed. “... No, I don't see it. Sorry.”

             Erwin looks at the beads that sit on the cat’s face, supposed to be the eyes, and even though they weren’t Levi’s eyes, it still struck him as the sort of… Wonder that Levi had sometimes. It wasn’t often Erwin saw it anymore, but it still felt nostalgic, almost. He smiles warmly at the thought. “…mm. Maybe we should come back here once we finish with everything else.”

           “Sure. That's fine with me.” Levi seems a little bored, only half-heartedly digging through the toys. The crowds weren't bothering him as much over in this smaller, quieter corner of the carnival- but that didn't mean he wasn't going to get bored when they could find something more fun to do. “What's this ‘everything else’ you're talking about? Half of these carnival rides seem like a death trap, not that a Jaeger isn't one, and these booths just want my money. Is there more to a carnival, or what?”

             “A carnival’s a place where you go to waste money, Levi,” Erwin laughs, shaking his head as he leads the way out of the booth. He keeps them to the side as he tries to get a good look at the layout of the carnival, charting a route for them to follow. “Mm… Have you never been to a carnival before, Levi? This isn’t quite the best one I’ve seen before, but… It seems fairly lively.”

             “No, I've never been. There was never any where I lived before joining the Jaeger program.” Levi just trails along after Erwin, letting him lead the way. He doesn't really know where to go, so if Erwin knew what he was doing, that worked for him. “There are a lot of people here… I didn't realize they were so popular.”

              Erwin decides on a good place to start before he reaches out and takes Levi’s hand, leading the way through the crowd before they end up at a small food booth. He doesn’t ask, instead telling Levi to wait before he quickly slips in line, and he’s back with what looks to be a few sticks of takoyaki in only a minute or so. He smiles as he holds one out to Levi. “Here. Try this. You’ll like it.”

             Levi doesn't mind waiting, especially if it meant he didn't have to be in line, or in a crowd. “Is this… Takoyaki? I've never had it before, but I've seen it in shows.” Levi gratefully takes one of the sticks, inspecting it before trying a bite. “... Mm. ” His eyes very nearly light up, and he quickly tries a few more. “Wow. This is good…”

“See? I told you.” Erwin smiles when he sees Levi enjoy it, and he hands him another stick when he finishes up his own. He starts a nice, relaxed pace through the crowd, enjoying the way Levi seemed to enjoy the food - even letting the man have the rest of his under the excuse of not being hungry. Of course, Erwin was hungry, but, well, Levi seemed to really enjoy it. It was worth seeing the way his expression would light up.

Eventually, once Levi finishes his food, Erwin stops them at a smaller game booth. It seemed fairly straightforward - get the most water at the target, win a prize. Erwin shoots Levi a look, grinning. “Up for a friendly little competition? This one’s got cute prizes you could win. Like… Look, there’s a cute bear plushie. Or… A squirrel. And a fox?”

            “Mm… The prizes are alright.” Levi's not all that interested in any of the prizes, but he wouldn't pass up the chance at trying to beat Erwin in something. He tosses the takoyaki sticks away in a nearby trash can, cracking his knuckles. “You're on, blondie. I hope you're prepared to lose. I'll even let you pick the prize if I win.”

             Levi decides to pay for the game this time, although he immediately frowns down at his wallet when he does. He just pinches his expression and shuts it again, taking his spot by one of the water guns. When Erwin joins him, he gives him a friendly bump before the timer starts. Levi gets off to a great start, but his meter just doesn't seem to fill up as fast as Erwin's- and by the time the bell rings, it isn't Levi's going off. “ What? That's totally not fair.” He scoffs, almost offended that a rigged carnival game was, well, rigged. “ Ugh. And after all that bragging I did…”

           “Well, since I won, I guess I’ll pick the prize, since you’re not too privy of any of these, mm?” Erwin seems to practically glow when he wins, ever so confident in his aiming skills. Even if Levi thought it was rigged, well, Erwin thought otherwise… But he wouldn’t make him know that. Instead, he just shines Levi a guilty grin before going up to the counter. He seems to negotiate with the woman at the counter, using a bit of his charm to woo her over. She seems to smile after a few words were exchanged, and she nods, turning back to look under the counter. Erwin waits patiently before she pulls out what looks to be a deer plushie. It’s cute, a little larger than the usual prizes they’d have won with just one round, but, well, Erwin was ever the haggler. He brings it back to Levi, absolutely beaming with pride. “See? This is cute. I thought you’d like this. What do you think? It’s yours. You did well, Levi.”

            Levi had watched the scene curiously, with a pouty expression and crossed arms, and he couldn't help but to roll his eyes when he saw that signature “Smith charm” come out. He'd seen it plenty of times before- Talking to women, sponsors, bartenders… Anyone that Erwin was looking to strike a deal with. He'd tried it on Levi himself, once, before they knew each other very well, but he'd seen through it almost embarrassingly easily, and Erwin had never tried it since. Now, it was just something Erwin did that made Levi… well, not jealous, exactly, but something similar. All these people, always fawning over him. 

            “You don't have to give me some bullshit compliment, blondie. I'm not some dog.” Still, he takes the deer from him and looks it over. For me, huh? I was the one who paid for the damn game. Still… It left Levi's chest a little fuzzy and warm, although he'd never admit it. The deer was cute… and quite soft to the touch. Levi had never had a plushie before, either. His expression softens, and he gives a silent nod, tucking it under his arm. “... It's cute, I guess. Thanks.”

              Even with Levi’s harsh words, Erwin can’t help the smile that finds itself on his face at the man’s reaction to the plushie. He watches as the man seems to flush ever so slightly, admiring the deer before he accepts the gift. He’s more thankful for the fact that Levi actually takes it rather than just giving it back, and it has him soften just a little. “Of course, Levi. Take good care of it.”

              —+—

               It’s the deer I got him. Erwin smiles as he recalls the memories from that night, walking over to admire it on the bed. It’s obviously worn from the time he’d had it, probably a good few years old at this point, but it was clear that Levi did take care of it, the fabric almost spotlessly clean. He brushes his fingers through the plushie’s fur. The rest of the night afterwards, from what he could remember, had gone well - Levi had beat him at a few other games, they’d gotten some good food, and were the only ones still sober by the end of the night. It was… Nice, seeing that side of Levi. Of course, Erwin had known him for a while at that point, but he could still remember the novelty of seeing Levi so… Sweet. It has his chest warm at the mere nostalgia of it, and the thought that Levi still even had it. Even after their accident, and Levi split from him… He thought it was important enough to even take it on a small trip like this. Erwin didn’t want to think about the implications, even though a part of him - the part that’d seen the implications in the Drift - knew exactly what it meant. 

               “I didn’t know you still had this,” Erwin notes, picking up the deer plushie and heading to the bathroom, leaning against the door while hugging it to his chest, wearing a teasing grin as he sees Levi’s face shift in the reflection of the mirror, clearly embarrassed. “It looks like you’ve taken care of it, too. Was your first carnival that important to you? It’s cute, so I can’t really blame you.”

            Levi was definitely scrambling for what he should say as an excuse. There wasn't really any sort of excuse he could use, considering he'd literally brought some cheap toy from years ago with him on this trip. He lets out a huff and finishes setting out his things for later and the morning after, finally lifting his eyes back up to meet Erwin's gaze in the mirror again. Maybe honesty is the best idea.

            “It wasn't about it being from my first carnival.” Levi tongues at his cheek, choosing his words carefully. “It… Was from you. It was the first time someone had done something like that for me. Given me some dumb toy just because he thought I'd like it. And I did.” Levi's cheeks turn the faintest shade of pink, and he looks away. “... I couldn't bring myself to leave it behind when I left. It's come with me everywhere I've gone. And… For a while, I couldn't sleep at all without it. It… Was the only piece of you that I let myself take with me.” 

             Erwin feels warm at Levi’s words, knowing the man was speaking genuinely. It wasn’t often that he’d get so sentimental about things, but… It was clear that the deer was important to him. Important because Erwin gave it to him. He can’t help the small smile that finds its way on his face at the thought. He looks down at the deer before he sighs softly, stepping forward and into the bathroom. He walks up behind Levi before he sets the plush on the counter, slow as he slips his arm around Levi, pressing against the man’s back. He presses his face to the top of his head, giving him as best of a hug as he could, considering things. 

             “I’m glad,” he murmurs, enjoying the closeness. Like this, it felt as if Erwin could swallow Levi whole , but… A vague memory reminded him of just how much Levi had truly grown. Even since their height of experience from being pilots, it was clear Levi had bulked up even more, and Erwin can feel the way the man’s muscles felt stiffer against him. He’s taking good care of himself. “…When you left the Shatterdome after the accident, once I had the power to do so, I prohibited anyone from transferring to your room. Whenever I’d get especially nostalgic or, well, drunk, sometimes I’d go there and sleep in your bed. Creepy, I know, but it was comforting to be surrounded by you, even if what you’d done hurt me even more every time. …What I mean to say is that I get it, Levi. I think. It’s nothing to be ashamed about.”

            “Really?” Honestly, Levi's a little surprised by that. To him, Erwin had always been the one between them that could control himself, and his emotions. Levi was the short-tempered one. Erwin was the logical, calculated one. Hearing Erwin tell him of a time where he wasn't that way, and instead had let his emotions over Levi leaving get to him, was shocking. “That's… a little reassuring, actually. For a while I wondered how you felt about me leaving. Whether you were upset, depressed, angry … I could never decide. I knew you would miss me, but… I did what I felt I had to do, even if I might regret it now.”

            Erwin frowns slightly, although he tries not to let Levi’s words get to him. You didn’t have to leave. He tightens his arm around him, nestling just a little closer. “…I was angry. For a long time. I couldn’t understand why you’d leave when I needed you the most. It felt like… You abandoned me to deal with the aftermath of everything on my own. I know you didn’t mean to do that now, but… That anger eventually ebbed away into grief . I’d lost you, but now I have you again. You’re here, and you won’t leave me again.”

            Levi's hand finds Erwin's, and he gently rests his palm across the back of Erwin's. It felt… really nice to be held like this. Even though it was just Erwin pressed against him with one hand wrapped around him, he felt safe. Comfortable. He didn't want to be anywhere else. He turns his head a little, able to press a bit more against Erwin's neck, seeking that extra bit of contact.

           “I'm sorry I left.” Levi's voice is a little shaky. “I… I wish I could tell you exactly why. I was just… angry. With you. I thought we'd finally gotten to a place of understanding, where we'd be so in sync and a part of each other that we'd be invincible. That you'd trust me to protect you, just as I trusted you to protect me. And then… You went and pulled that stunt, sacrificing yourself for me… And that image came shattering down for me. I didn't want that. I thought we both knew what we needed to be for each other, but… I was wrong. Erwin, going forward… We can't be doing sacrifices. Not for each other.”

            “…It wasn’t a sacrifice. Me doing that was protecting you.” Erwin straightens up, gazing down at Levi with an unreadable expression. He didn’t know how he felt at the current moment. Whereas he wanted to understand Levi’s words, he just couldn’t. “Do you just expect me to stand by and let you get killed? Levi, you of all people should know just how important you are to me. If I’d lost you then - truly lost you, then I would have given up. You were my reason to fight. Now, it’s a bit different, but I felt peace knowing that, even though I thought you’d hated me, you were alive. … I suppose it’s different now, though. I’ve realized I can live without you.”

             Erwin pulls away from Levi, jaw clenching as he takes a step back. “I lost my arm for you to ensure your survival - the best Jaeger pilot the world has ever seen. And yet, you still blame me for you abandoning me. As if it were my choice to lose you. You… You forced me to change, Levi. I’m not the same man that I was before, but even still, I know the moment I step into that Drift pod, I would lose my arm all over again if it meant saving you. Asking me to prioritize myself over you in the Drift isn’t just reckless, Levi. It’s selfish. I’m not the pilot that will seal the breach. You are. You’ve proven that I can be replaced by leaving. Don’t…” 

              He clenches his fist, almost shaking, strangely emotional for a man who seemed so put together. “…Don’t try to guilt trip me into saving myself over you. As a Marshal, it’s my duty to ensure humanity’s survival. You are humanity’s greatest chance at winning, and I will do anything to make sure that you survive. And if that means you can’t pilot with me, then I’ll find you another pilot by tomorrow. …Don’t make me do that, Levi. You have to try to survive. Live. Prioritize the mission instead of me. ”

           “... I'm not trying to do that.” Whatever openness Levi had begun to have with Erwin, it's gone now. His expression is closed off, although it's murky with emotions Levi can't even begin to recognize. For once, Levi keeps his calm. “I know what I am. I know what you are. I know what I'm capable of. But it's this protection you're talking about that's making me- us- weak. If you hadn't protected me back then, I would have been able to properly intercept the Kaiju- or at least have a fighting chance. Instead, you took it upon yourself to ‘protect me’, which meant ‘sacrificing’ your arm for me. Sure, you were trying to protect me, as you keep saying… But you need to look in a mirror. If I’m being selfish, then so are you. You just refuse to see it.”

         Levi holds himself, turning away from the mirror to look at the floor. He feels sick. “I'm not saying to save yourself. Nor am I asking you to protect me. We have a greater duty than that, Erwin, that's what I'm trying to say. We have to stop thinking about this as you and I. We have to think of it as us or the world. I'm prepared to die in that Jaeger, not because I'm suicidal- but because it just might be the thing that's needed to save the world. Stop the Kaiju. If the person I trust more than anything in that drift with me is determined to keep me alive, against all costs, how am I supposed to be okay with that? How am I supposed to do my duty? If you keep me out of a Jaeger, you ground your best pilot. If you don't go with me, I risk a weak connection with a pilot I don't trust, and die before I ever reach the breach.”

            He finally stands up fully, reaching for the deer. He brushes its antlers back before he picks it up, going to leave the bathroom now. I don't want to talk any more. This is getting us nowhere. “I'm not prioritizing you. I wouldn't have left if that was the case. You know you can live without me, and I can live without you.” Clutching the deer to his chest, Levi turns to speak over his shoulder to Erwin. “... if you want to keep me, Erwin, you have to let me go. That's the only way this is ever going to work.”

            “I can’t. ” Erwin’s voice is choked - leaking every single emotion that was clogging his chest right now. He felt as if he could barely even breathe. Levi was right. Of course he was - Erwin was the selfish one for trying to prioritize Levi’s survival. He didn’t care about the world. He cared about Levi. Even when the truth was thrown right in his face, Erwin couldn’t face it. He didn’t want to. You’re emotional. Calm down. Think of it rationally. Levi’s right. You shouldn’t let the past influence today. Stop it. And, yet, it felt as if he had some sort of disconnect between his head and his body. Despite how much he wanted to stop, to listen and to do his job as Marshal, he couldn’t let go. 

            Erwin doesn’t even know he’s crying until he hears the faint sound of the tears hitting the tiles on the floor. He clenches his hand tight, shoulders trembling. How long has it been since..? He swallows thickly, trying to steady his breathing, to no avail. “…I can’t, Levi. Not… Not anymore. You’re…” Everything. Erwin reaches up and rubs his hand across his face, flicking the tears away. Don’t let Levi see you. “…Give me time. I’ll… Get over myself. You’ll do your mission, and… And I’ll do mine. That’s all that needs to happen. Right? That’s - that’s what you want, isn’t it? That’s what’ll save the world. It’s always… Always about the world. Not you. Not me. Not us.” Get it together. “Fine. Then… Then… That’s what I’ll do. But I’m not doing this for the world. I’m doing this for you. And if what you want is to die in a blaze of glory if it meant saving the world, then… I’ll get over it.”

            Levi stops in his tracks the moment he hears Erwin… break. He turns back with wide eyes, seeing the man trembling, crying, alone. Because of Levi. Always because of me. Was this what happened when I left..? Levi doesn’t know what to do. Erwin never cried. He didn't cry. What was someone like Levi supposed to do for a man that never cried ?

           “... Erwin.” Levi sets the deer aside and comes up to Erwin, quietly cupping Erwin's cheek. He rubs away the tears while his other hand finds Erwin's, making it unclench so he can slot their fingers together. “... Give up your dreams, and fight. ” He knows it's cruel. He wants nothing more than to profess to Erwin that he didn't want the mission to come first. If he had a choice, he would take Erwin and they would go far, far away, living a life together away from all the hurt and anguish that being a Jaeger pilot brought. But… He can't. He has to solidify this, here and now. “I love you, but that can't come between what needs to be done. We just might not be meant for a happy ending. So… you need to give up on your dreams, fight… and if it comes to it, die. Die for me. For the world. For us. Anything. I'll be by your side through it all, until the end, whether that be in a Jaeger at the end of the world, or old and wrinkly next to each other in a home together. That's the only way to do this, blondie.” Levi's eyes crinkle with a small smile, pulling Erwin's forehead against his. “Give up with me.”

             Erwin's quiet, almost unresponsive… Until he reflects Levi’s smile - small, wistful, ironic. The only route to go would be to give up. It was the only way to guarantee the best thing, to be the pilot he was meant to be. And even though his heart aches at the mere thought of abandoning his will to keep Levi alive… It was what Levi wanted. He knew that. Erwin sighs softly, pressing into Levi’s touch, squeezing his hand gently before closing his eyes, relishing in it. He couldn’t let himself be selfish any longer. 

             “…Then we’ll plug the breach. Together. If anything… Dying with you will be an honor I don’t deserve,” Erwin murmurs, letting Levi hold him as long as he deemed necessary. He doesn’t pull away, nor does he make a move to do anything else. He lets himself live in the moment instead of worrying about the future - just for now. Just for now… He’d get his selfish wants out so he could focus on what was really important. “I’m… Sorry. For being such a coward. You… Deserve a much better pilot than me, but if I’m the one you choose, then I’ll make you proud. I swear it.”

            “... good. Now… just stay with me like this for a moment, would you?” Levi's heart aches , but it's a little easier to handle when he's holding Erwin like this. He's with me. I won't have to worry anymore. He’s with me. I won't let this go to waste. He stands a bit further on his toes to gently press his lips against Erwin's, soft, and almost a little sad. But he falls back into the gentle quiet with Erwin after that, relishing in what felt like such little time left together.

Chapter Text

            Erwin sighs softly, leaning on the railing overlooking the Shatterdome. His gaze flicks across each of the Jaegers, mechanics and engineers alike working on them to ensure that they were in the best state that they could be in. After all, they needed them to be in tip-top shape if they were truly going to go through with the plan of exploding the breach. Especially now, with Hange so fervent - she’d apparently learned something from the Kaiju brain while they were gone. He could remember her telling him about it as soon as they’d returned, making headway on the research with the category 3 Kaiju’s brain they’d recovered from their previous fight. Immediately afterwards, he issued the mechanics out… But he was still just a bit unsure. One, he didn’t know exactly what Hange had learned, and two, she seemed somewhat… Erratic. Then again, she seemed absolutely positive about her newfound knowledge. He’d just have to trust her judgment.

            Erwin’s brow knits in frustration. If Hange had truly learned something imperative to their plan of exploding the breach, from what she’d made it sound, then he’d need to plan accordingly. He huffs, rubbing his face in his hand before he straightens up upon hearing footsteps down the platform from him. He looks over, eyes catching on Levi before he seems to relax a little.

            “Levi. Are the cadets settled back in and ready to work?” he asks, fixing his suit from where it’d wrinkled thanks to the safety bar separating Erwin from the Shatterdome floor. “If so, they’ll need to start training again right away. Hange learned something from the Kaiju brain. I wanted to wait for you before going to debrief with her, since… Well, if anyone here knows Kaiju almost as much as she does, it’s you.”

            “They are, actually. I was worried they wouldn't settle in after that trip, but they got right back to it. I’ve got them doing something now, so I should have some free time to meet with you and Hange.” Levi steps up to him, helping to smooth any wrinkles out in his suit, and fixing some of the pins on Erwin's chest. “It must be incredibly important if it's got you this worked up. I can tell you're stressing too much. I know we're about to enact our plans to blow the breach, but… It makes you look ten years older. It's all going to work out, blondie.”

Erwin snorts, Levi’s words fairly amusing, but they do get him to straighten up just a little bit, seeming to compose himself. “...Sorry. I’ve got a lot on my mind, if you couldn’t tell,” he says warmly, smiling when the man moves to fix his uniform. “It hasn’t been that noticeable, has it..?”

            “No. I'm probably the only person who can tell.” Levi finishes smoothing Erwin's uniform before he slips by him, knowing Erwin would follow once he realized Levi was heading for the laboratory. Ever since they'd spent the time together on the trip, and had their talk, things seemed even more tightly knit between them- at least, to Levi. He no longer had any doubts in their relationship. He was strengthened by having Erwin by his side, and knowing that they'd be drifting together… It was a heavy weight off of Levi's shoulders. Sure, he was asking the man he loved more than anything to give up his life and Levi's, but… He knew it was what needed to be done. It's why Erwin had sought him out in the first place.

            “So, tell me what you know. You haven't told me much, other than the plan to plant the bomb and get out. Is this all we've got?” Levi walks closely to Erwin. “I'm really hoping that's not it, and we're not about to go try to hinge off of whatever crazy theory Hange's about to feed us.”

            “You’re about to be sorely disappointed,” Erwin says, gaze flicking down to Levi as they walk. “Most of what I’m hinging on is probabilities. We’ve obviously gotten a visual on the breach - that’s about as much as I’m working with. Technically speaking, if its makeup is what it seems to be on the outside, then we’ll need to disrupt its ‘connection’ to the Earth - so blowing up the surface around it should suffice to close it in.”

            He frowns slightly, shifting his gaze away. “That’s the thing, though - we’re banking on the fact that it behaves like a typical wormhole. There’s no backup plan for if it behaves differently. I’m hoping that Hange’s new knowledge will at least give me a semblance of something to go off of when it comes to confronting the Kaiju near the breach, or the breach itself. If this doesn’t work… I’m not sure where to go from here.”

            “Mm.” Levi listens to Erwin's explanation with an unreadable, but unpleasant, expression. It's clear he doesn't like the uncertainty, but… a lot of their lives had been filled with uncertainty. Maybe a little more will be okay. “I don't like it at all, but I understand why it's our only option right now. I just… I don't know if they're all going to be ready. This is a huge mission to be their first …”

            Levi just lets out a gentle sigh. You can do most of it. They'll be alright. He doesn't bring up any more of his concerns, deciding not to stress Erwin out even more, especially not right before an important briefing with Hange. Levi opens the door to the lab, letting Erwin in first- as was proper. He stays slightly behind and to Erwin’s right side, almost as if he was protecting him. 

            The lab… Is a mess, especially for only two people working in it. Levi cringes as he avoids all of the messes. Scattered pages, old drinks, pizza boxes, and various other things littered the floors and tables. There were stacks of books and weirdly alive looking things teetering haphazardly, and Levi nearly jumps three feet in the air when he accidentally knocks one over.

            “M-Marshal Smith..!” A man slightly younger than Levi himself stood at attention as best he could as Erwin approached. His arms were full of what looked to be notebooks and various diagrams. He looked incredibly nervous. “Please excuse the mess. Miss Hange is, uh… In one of her moods. It's all I can do to keep up with her requests… I haven't had time to clean up the lab. I'm so very sorry.”

            “Moblit. It’s alright. I know how Hange can be,” Erwin reassures him, to which the man seems to visibly relax a little. He looks back over to Levi, seeing the unease in the man’s expression, and he chuckles a little, turning back to Moblit. “Speaking of, where is she? She was supposed to meet us out here. Is she still in the back room, by chance?”

            Moblit nods, and a flash of concern shoots its way across his face. “Yes, sir. She hasn’t left the lab since the Jaeger delivery yesterday, so she’s a bit… Erratic. I apologize for anything she might say or do.”

            Erwin nods, gently touching Levi’s arm when he sees the man distracted with a large vial of what seemed to be alive Kaiju tissue. He finds the specimen intriguing, but he can definitely understand the disgust that was painted on Levi’s expression. “Alright, then. Come on, General,” he says, trying to pull Levi’s attention away from it. “Are you doing alright?”

            “... I'm fine. This place is just… creepy. And it's a mess. I don't know how Hange can even stand to look at this place.” Levi does finally look away from the specimen and back to Erwin, especially as he starts to pull him to where Hange was. Still, his expression does not change from the one of disgust he held before. “No wonder she's crazy, after spending all of her time here. Jeez…”

            “Don’t be rude.” Erwin gently baps Levi on the shoulder, as if chiding a child. He looks over to Moblit, giving him an apologetic smile. “I apologize for General Ackerman’s behavior. He hasn’t been in the lab before, you see. He’s not the best when it comes to, mm… Gore. Don’t mind him. He doesn’t mean it personally. Now, then, can you take us to Hange?”

            “Y-Yes, sir.” Moblit brings them to the back room, which was practically lined with test tubes just like the one that Levi had detested. Most evidently is the huge tank in the back, containing a part of a Kaiju brain. Levi immediately hides half-way behind Erwin, even as Hange finally pops up from her work as Moblit taps her on the shoulder. “Miss Hange, the Marshal and General Ackerman are here to see you. Did you lose track of time again?”

            “Shit!” Hange stands up from her desk suddenly, sending papers flying. She's got a ridiculous set of goggles on her, which seem to impede her view as she very nearly charges right into Erwin. Levi swiftly nudges him out of the way and trips her, watching as she lets out a yell and falls to the ground. “ Wagh ! What was-?” She takes her goggles off and rubs her nose, her eyes wide as she realizes that Erwin and Levi were actually in the room already. “Oh! Hi, I totally got side tracked. That's my bad. Moblit, get some water!”

            “Yes, Miss Hange.” Moblit stops where he's trying to tidy up, flashing Erwin a sheepish smile as he hurries out of the room to ‘get some water.’ Neither party would be surprised if he came back, or if Hange forgot. 

            “So, what do you have for us, four-eyes? You said it was important.” Levi helps her up, but he immediately wipes his hand off once she's standing. “I have cadets to train before the end of the world, so I'd like you to make it quick.”

            Hange hurries back to her desk, rummaging through a few of the papers she’d been hastily scribbling on before she finds one, making an aha! sound before she goes back to Erwin and Levi, handing Erwin the paper. “So! You know how I was telling you about the brain from your last fight? Well, when we obtained it, even though it’s just a partial piece of the brain - obviously, since the whole brain probably wouldn’t even fit in here - I managed to find out that the piece is actually a chunk of the Kaiju’s frontal lobe. In case you didn’t know, the frontal lobe is the-”

            “The main brain area for processing information and memory encoding. I know, Hange. We took the same classes,” Erwin says, lips twitching with amusement as he looks down at the paper, starting to read it over. His brow knits the more he reads. Levi, on the other hand, seemed a little lost. “Go on.”

            “Right! So, in case you both didn’t know this, either, the main function of the Drift is to connect compatible pilots, which is basically through the frontal lobe. It’s theorized that the frontal lobe is where the main conscience of the brain sits, since it’s responsible for intentional choices, behavior, and plays a huge role in memory encoding. By connecting two frontal lobes, we’re able to make the Drift - and you two are able to see inside each others’ minds.” Hange gets a huge grin. “Now, I’ve been working on something, but - but you wouldn’t believe it, Erwin. The brain’s still alive . I don’t know how, but it is! And - and - I think I’ve figured out how to crack it. I think I can drift with the Kaiju brain.”

            “... I was only joking about you being crazy, but now I'm thinking you might actually be insane.” Levi can't help a scoff. “Hange, this is the most ridiculous idea you could have ever come up with. Two pilots can barely handle a jaeger. What makes you think you can handle drifting with a Kaiju ? It's a damn Kaiju! ”

            Erwin’s quiet as he focuses on the paper, reading over Hange’s plans before he looks up at her, letting out a soft sigh. “You can’t guarantee this is going to be safe, can you? Besides, you’ve never drifted before, Hange. If it’s the same as ours, then you might get caught up in the RABIT with the Kaiju. It could potentially kill you. But… This could be beneficial. Are you sure you’re up for this?”

            Hange nods enthusiastically, heading back to her desk before she grabs a neural helmet that she’d been tinkering with, lifting it up and showing it to them - how the wiring connected to the brain in the preservation tube. “Absolutely, Erwin. Think about it - the benefits heavily outweigh the risks in this, right? And that’s always the goal when it comes to research! If this works, not only could we find out more about the Kaiju themselves, but we could find out where they come from - where they really come from. Or even how they function. Why are they deciding to attack Earth of all places? Don’t you think this is worth dedicating to? If - If you just give me a day or two, I’m really close to cracking it. I’ll get in the Drift myself and I’ll test it out.”

            “...I can’t postpone the plan of closing the breach, Hange.” Erwin frowns a little. “Even if I tried to, the preparations are already mostly underway. If I were to stop this plan, we’d not only lose all of these hours we’ve spent preparing, but we’d run out of time and patience from the brass. Will you be able to get me the answers I need before the mission?”

            “I can sure try, ” Hange says rather excitedly, not at all perturbed by Erwin’s pessimism. “What’s the worst that could happen? Besides, Moblit’ll be watching me and he’ll pull me out if it gets too dangerous. Worst case, the Drift kills the brain and I don’t get anything, but you still explode the breach. Best case, we learn more about the Kaiju before you leave, and we can use that knowledge to our advantage to close it. Please, Erwin. Just sign it off.”

            Erwin sighs softly, clearly thinking it over. He shoots a glance over at Levi. Hange’s right. We’ve been taking enough risks as it is, but… Even if we manage to close the breach, if we don’t study the Kaiju more, we won’t be able to prevent it again if another breach opens. We might be able to keep them from coming permanently. He reaches into his pocket, fetching a pen before he signs off on the paper, handing it back to Hange, who immediately breaks out a huge grin. “Hurry it up, then, but be safe about it. I don’t want to come home to one of my friends dead.”

            “You won’t, sir. You can count on me to get this done.” Hange nods before she looks over at Levi. “And you’d better make sure the Marshal gets home safely, General. I’m sure you’re plenty capable of doing so, but this mission will be dangerous. I’ve already projected you to run into multiple category threes and fours when you approach the breach - maybe even a potential five. Who knows what they’ll send out once they figure out we’re shutting the breach? Just… Be safe. Oh! Speaking of, I had Winged Freedom equipped with some almost nuclear bombs. They won’t pop until you pull the plug, but I thought I’d do that just in case something goes wrong. You two are the only ones I’d trust to handle those things.”

            “Mm.” His and Erwin's conversation the other night echoes in his mind, and he can't truly bring himself to promise that he'd bring Erwin home safe and alive. I might not even make it myself, Hange. I’m sorry. We're both prepared to lay down our lives for this. “We'll be as safe as we can, Kaiju, bombs, and all. Are the bombs manually set, or part of the rig?”

            As Levi and Hange get into the specifics of the modifications made to Winged Freedom, Erwin lets himself roam around the room, admiring the specimens of the Kaiju parts in the vials. Whereas Levi found them disgusting and Hange found them, well, as important as her life, Erwin found them… Intriguing. Their anatomy was not dissimilar to humans, although it was obvious that it was somewhat alien in makeup. They had brains, hearts, teeth, and bones. With brains as big as theirs were, it was hard to believe that the Kaiju were just some… Senseless monsters. There had to be a purpose behind their attacks - a reason why they wanted the human race eradicated. He furrows his brow before he turns to Levi, feeling an unfamiliar impatience simmering in his gut at the thought. We need to get them out of here to pick on someone their own size. “Levi. It's time we go. We both have more preparations to do.”

            “... yes, sir.” Levi abandons his conversation with Hange, and after a moment's debate, he gives her heart a little hit with his fist. “Don't die, alright? I doubt I'll get to see you before I'm shipped out, even if you manage to get this stupid plan to work. And quit overworking Moblit. Guy looks like he's going to keel over at any moment.”

            “... Alright. You stay safe too, Levi.” Hange returns to her work as Levi joins Erwin's side again, and they leave the lab. Levi gives Moblit a wave as they leave, and as soon as they're out, Levi lets out a deep sigh to relieve the tension. 

            “So… What do you really think of that, Erwin?” Levi keeps his eyes on the floor ahead of them. “Hange might be onto something, but… It might kill her, too. I don't think it's worth it for something that might not even work. ”

            Erwin hums in thought, deliberating over it. “I trust Moblit to keep her in check. If he thinks it’s too dangerous, then he won’t let her do it. Besides… I think this is something worth pursuing. Especially if this mission ends up failing. We need to know more about the Kaiju, and this is the best opportunity we have at it, isn’t it? We don’t have the luxury of time to invest in it more, either, with the threat of the program getting shut down…”

            He huffs, clearly frustrated at the mere concept of the program getting shut down, but he doesn’t comment on it. As they enter the Shatterdome, Erwin pauses before he turns to Levi. “That’s why we need to ensure this mission goes as smoothly as possible. If anything, we at least need to minimize the Kaiju threat by making the breach area unstable. We need this mission to go right, even if it’s just to prolong the program. Hange’s idea… I think that might get us there. Call it a… Gut feeling of mine.”

            “A gut feeling…” Levi lets out a little noise, disgruntled. “Well…” He sighs, giving Erwin a look- and then does a similar gesture to Erwin's chest that he'd done to Hange’s. A closed fist across Erwin's heart. “I trust your judgement. I might not see you much before tomorrow, but keep me updated on plans. If nothing gets moved up earlier before we hit the breach tomorrow, I'll stop by your room tonight.”

            When he withdraws his hand, Levi looks… shy . “I want to… spend the night with you, if that's okay. I know that tomorrow isn't certain. But… tonight can be. I'll make sure to take care of all of my duties. And if you don't want to be together tonight, or you're busy, I understand. Pretend I never asked.”

             Erwin’s eyes widened at the extent of the offer Levi was making. …He wants to stay the night? With me? I mean… They used to spend the night together when they were pilots - back in their prime. He’d thought that, even with their newfound closeness now, that Levi would be insistent on his independence… But hearing that the man wanted to spend potentially their last night alive with him, well, it made his chest warm with affection. He can’t help the small flush that paints itself on his cheeks, natural - especially when the man wasn’t used to feeling quite like this. It was nice. 

             “I’d like that,” Erwin murmurs, giving Levi a small smile as he reaches forward to gently squeeze his hand. He’s careful not to let it linger, especially with the off chance that someone would come down the hallway at this exact moment, but he hoped it was enough to get his feelings across. He straightens up, seeming to gather himself before he nods. “Very well. Make sure the cadets are ready for tomorrow. And… Mm. Actually, remind me tonight to show you the overview of the formation I’ve been working on. You’ll like it. It minimizes potential hazards, so… It’ll be an easy formation for greenies like them to handle. It’s not ideal, but we’ll have to be okay with putting them at the frontline. There should be minimal risk of death to the new squadron, unless a Kaiju manages to slip past or… Ahem.”

            Erwin clears his throat. “…We’re also in the back line. As a last resort, as well as to protect the bomb carrier. And, no, I didn’t choose this to protect you. I want Winged Freedom to be the one to plant the bombs. As a Mark 2, she’s bulkier than the others - she can tank hits better. Along with that, she has the nuclear core… Should the need arise to make a makeshift bomb. Of course, you’ll see the plan more in detail later, but… What do you think?”

            “Mm…” Levi nods. Erwin’s words serve as a good reassurance to him, and… He doesn't hate the plan. “... It's a good plan. If the others can clear our way to the rift, then it should work out well. We plant the bombs, get out. Hope to God this suicide mission doesn't kill us. At least we know , thanks to Hange, that there's going to be another Kaiju breach in just under twelve hours. Her data's been reliable so far… so I’m willing to have some faith in this. In you.”

           “…Thank you.” Erwin feels relieved with Levi’s agreement, and he visibly relaxes at the man’s compliance. “If everything goes right, then… We’ll be okay. No suicide mission required, mm? We just have to time things perfectly - otherwise… Hm. I need to make sure the preparations are going well. Then there’s the paperwork for me piloting…”

            Levi lets out a sigh, looking up at the clock counting down to when the next Kaiju was set to come. These could be my last few hours with Erwin, and he's stressing himself to an early grave. He turns to the man, and after a few seconds of deliberation- he stands on his toes and drags Erwin down to his height for the rest of it, pressing an inexperienced kiss to his lips. He leans back with flushed cheeks. “... Don't overwork yourself before the end of the world. If you don't show up in your room while I'm there, I'll kill you the moment you step foot into our Jaeger.” He steps back and brushes his clothing off, clearing his throat. “Mm. I'll see you later, Erwin.” 

             “I…” Erwin flushes up, too, but he’s quick to straighten up when given the opportunity. He smiles warmly down at Levi, reaching to squeeze Levi’s hand before he pulls away. “I’ll see you,” he murmurs before he turns, briskly walking away before he could do something that would potentially embarrass him even further. 

Chapter Text

             If Erwin had to stare at any more papers, he might just lose it. 

             There was much more paperwork than he’d initially believed to be when it came to clearing this mission entirely. Of course, he’d made sure he could actually do the mission before going this far, but it was all technicalities. He was making plans in case things did go awry - in case the breach didn’t close, or if he and Levi…

              …He didn’t want to think about it too deeply, but there needed to be a way forward in the case that he could no longer lead the Jaeger program. He needed to leave them a reason to keep fighting. Erwin wanted the program to keep going. The walls weren’t going to hold up. 

              Erwin rolls his nose between his fingers as he feels a headache start to settle in, and he finishes signing up a stack of papers before sorting them into a file, sliding them into his desk. Just as he’s about to start on another stack, he hears Levi knock on his door. Two brisk knocks. He sighs softly, not moving. “Come in.”

              Levi steps in quietly, practically sneaking in. He leans back against Erwin's door as he locks it, staying right where he is. “... Marshal.” Levi can't bring himself to say Erwin's name at that moment. He looks like he has something he desperately wants to say, but he doesn't. He just keeps his tone as neutral as he can for now, but he keeps his distance. “You look busy, as always. Am I interrupting something?”

             “Mm? No, no… There’s just a lot of paperwork I need to fill out. But, uh… It can wait. I need a break, anyway.” Erwin notices Levi’s distance, and he sets the stack of papers aside before he stands up, rounding the desk… And waiting, leaning against it. “…Is everything okay? You seem on edge.”

            “Everything’s fine.” Levi goes quiet a moment more, his expression twisted. Conflicted. “I just… You're sure you want to go on this mission with me?” It's the first time that Levi has shown… Uncertainty. This entire time, he'd been the one to push Erwin into this. To insist he gave up on his dreams, and to do this with Levi. But… even then, he didn't want Erwin to die. He wanted to be selfish, like Erwin had wanted to, and make sure he lived. He had one last chance to make that happen, but… He was going to let Erwin make that choice. “This is the last chance you have to change your mind. Go on leading as the Marshal, from the safety of the Shatterdome. I could handle this mission with someone else. As the last resort.”

            There are plenty of words unspoken. I don't want you to die, even after everything I said. If you want to live, take your opportunity now. Let me do this… For you. He doesn't say it, but he's sure that within the conflict in his expression, Erwin can read into it plenty fine. He'd always known Levi the best, even outside of the drift, after all. Please, Erwin.

            Erwin softly sighs. He doesn’t want to lose me. He knew exactly what Levi was intending, even if his words contradicted the meaning. Levi’s face gave Erwin everything he needed to know - the man looked pained, almost, trying to convince Erwin to back out. He was unsure, just as he was. Afraid, even if Levi would never admit it. So was Erwin. But… This needed to happen. To ensure humanity’s survival, their best chance was them, unfortunately. Erwin would have felt more sure of leaving the responsibility to someone else if there were any other way. But with the new pilots as green as they were, and the senior pilots dwindling in numbers, the best way to secure the mission’s success was to send the best Jaeger out to confirm the bombs’ detonation. Winged Freedom was humanity’s chance to live. 

            “I’m absolutely positive.” Erwin says it with just as much conviction as Levi did when he’d convinced him of the mission two days ago. He straightens up off of the desk, stepping over to Levi, seeing the vulnerability in his face, his posture. He gently brushes his fingers along his cheek before he pulls him in for a hug, holding him tight. “There’s no other way. Leaving the mission in the hands of the other Jaeger pilots will only risk the mission more. You’re the best chance this place has to winning. And if the best way to support you is to die alongside you, then I’ll give up everything to make sure your dream is realized, Levi.”

            He lets out a shuddered breath, gently kissing Levi’s head. “...I’m not sending you out to die without me. If anything… I’d like our last moments to be together. Best case scenario, in the case that we meet our demise out there… We’ll still be connected. My last thought will be of you, and you of me. It’s… The best way to go, don’t you think? Together.”

            “... Yeah, it is.” Levi holds Erwin just as tightly, and he buries his face in Erwin's chest. He's thankful he can hide, because… He can feel how his eyes burn with the threat of tears. You have to do this, Levi. “Erwin… Tonight, I just want to be with you. I know we only have a few hours, nine, to be exact, before we have to do this mission, but… There's so much we haven't done. If we don't live to see another day together, then…”

            Levi takes a deep breath and pulls away from Erwin, looking up at him. He's seemed to have reigned his emotions in for the moment, but he doesn't guard his expression, letting Erwin see how he was truthful. “... I want you to have me fully tonight, Erwin. I want to… go all the way. I'm ready now. I'm not scared. I want to share a night with you, before everything might end. Will you give me that?”

             Erwin’s eyes widened a little at what exactly Levi was asking for. All the way? Does he mean- “Levi, are you sure..?” he asks, frowning. He knew exactly what Levi’s past entailed, and he didn’t want Levi to feel pressured to “get it done” before his potential end. “If you’re asking this of me just because you think it’s what you need to get done before tomorrow’s potential-“

              “ Stop that. That's not what this is.” Levi's hands squeeze at the fabric of Erwin's jacket, serious. “I want this, Erwin. When I said I wasn't ready before, I was telling the truth. But I'm ready now. Ideally, I wouldn't be offering on a whim like this, but… That doesn't change that I do want this, Erwin. I want you .”

              Erwin stares at Levi for a moment before he nods, reaching up to brush his fingers along Levi’s cheek. He lets out a soft sigh before he leans down, gently kissing him. “…Okay. If you’re sure, then that’s what I want, too. I’ll… I’ll take care of you, Levi. I promise. Tonight, you’re all mine.”

               He slips his hand into Levi’s, pulling him with him over to his bed, where he sits down on the edge, letting Levi have the “leverage”. Erwin smiles warmly up at him before he lets his hand roam over his side, slipping up his shirt and around his back. Just feeling Levi’s skin had his heart skip a beat, and he swallowed thickly. Even though he’d been offered multiple times, it wasn’t as if Erwin had… Done this before. “You’ll… Have to help undress me. It’s typically a sort of long ordeal, heh…” 

              “... Okay.” Levi steps a little closer. It comes to him with ease to start taking Erwin's uniform off. He unbuttons his jacket, mindful of the labels and badges, setting it aside once he's able. Then he moves to Erwin’s tie, gentle and careful as he undoes it. He then undoes the buttons of his shirt, his hands starting to shake just a little. He swallows thickly before just getting it done , helping Erwin shrug the shirt off. “... There. Now let me get mine off, while you… Get your pants off. Okay?”

              Levi doesn't move too far away, feeling Erwin's arm slip from his back as he does so. He quickly finds he misses the warmth. Still, he focuses on undoing his own clothes- just his shirt and pants, but it still takes him a bit. You're fine. It's Erwin. He slips out of the shirt and makes quick work of his pants. He hesitates for a moment more before his underwear follows, and he stands bare before Erwin. Thin but toned and muscular, skin smooth but scarred. He has the strength to keep his eyes on Erwin, unwavering. This is me. All for you.

             Erwin’s got his pants down at his feet when he looks up at Levi, and his eyes widen as he sees the man shown entirely, just for him. He isn’t shy with the way he lets his eyes follow the curve of his shoulders, down his chest to his hips, admiring him in his entirety. Wow. I knew he had nice thighs, but… He lets out a heavy breath, feeling himself twitch in his boxers, but he doesn’t bother with them yet, instead wanting to reach out, gently squeezing Levi’s side.

              “…You’re beautiful, Levi,” he murmurs, almost breathless as he pulls him in, immediately letting his lips find Levi’s chest, giving it a soft, affectionate kiss. Erwin looks up at him as he tries to pull him closer. “Absolutely beautiful. You’re… Perfect. Come here.”

              “Erwin…” The soft compliments make Levi's heart thunder louder than anything else they've done so far has. He resists Erwin's pull for only a moment longer before he gives in, letting himself be drawn in close. He slips his arms around Erwin's neck, trying to just do what feels natural in the moment. “... Do you really think I'm perfect?” It was so foreign to Levi to feel seen like this. Erwin knew everything about him, had been inside his mind, but this was the most exposed that Levi had ever felt. He rests his forehead against Erwin's, his voice soft. “Even with how flawed I am?”

              “I do.” Erwin responds with no hesitation, gently squeezing Levi’s hip as he presses into his touch. “I think the flaws make you even more perfect. They make you human. They make you real. I love them. Mm…” He trails his fingers along a scar he notices on Levi’s hip, having not seen it before. “What’s this one from?”

              “It's recent. Well… recent enough. A year, maybe.” Erwin's soft touch makes him shiver. He'd never let someone touch him like this… Not even Erwin. It was foreign, but… He found that he liked it. “It was in a fight with a category two. My co-pilot was inexperienced, but I figured we could handle it. We could not. He fell out of alignment, and we were sitting ducks… That Kaiju practically ripped our cockpit in half. We were both injured, but another jaeger saved our asses. I didn't pilot with him again after that.”

              Erwin smiles warmly as Levi talks, his hand circling the scar. He slips his hand down to Levi’s thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze before he pulls Levi closer, goading the man to climb into his lap. Like this, there was nothing to hide from each other - Levi could see all of him, and Erwin would see him, feel him against his skin. He finds that he could easily get addicted to the feeling. “Well, tonight… You’ll be safe here, in my arms. I’ll kiss every one of your scars so I can put them to memory. I want to know… Every inch of you, Levi. Can I do that?”

             “... Yes, you can.” Levi flushes, breathless. Being against Erwin like this, completely bare , skin to skin- god, it sent butterflies through his stomach. He felt like a kid again, sneaking off with Erwin to get some kissing in between training. It makes him a little emotional. “I love you, Erwin. I love you.”

              Levi takes the initiative this time, holding Erwin tighter as he leans in to kiss him. He’s slow and sweet, taking his time as much as he can for the moment. If nothing else, he'd kiss Erwin as much as he could, savoring each and every one. Still, he wants to be brave and do more. He trusts Erwin. He turns their soft kisses into open-mouthed ones, inviting Erwin to go a step forward with him. His hands slide down from Erwin's neck to his chest, feeling across his body in ways he never had before. Still as strong as ever, Erwin…

             Erwin feels a shiver run through him at Levi’s touch, slipping his arm around him, letting his palm explore the expanse of Levi’s back. He admires how it feels - he can tell Levi was still just as muscular as he was before, even if he didn’t seem like it in uniform. He lets out a soft breath against Levi’s lips, letting him deepen the kiss, feeling heat course through his body. “Levi…”

             He presses forward into Levi’s touch as he trails his lips from his towards his shoulder, trailing down his neck, littering kisses in his wake. Erwin finds a nice spot in the crook of Levi’s neck, taking in a deep breath before he lays an open-mouth kiss, sucking gently on his skin. With a soft sound, Erwin squeezes Levi’s side, shuffling a little - getting a little riled up. “ Levi… Mm. I love you, Levi. Can you… Help me with my briefs?” he murmurs against his skin, gazing up at Levi with a lidded expression, full of want. “I want you to see all of me, too.”

              “ Mm …” The little suck is already more than Levi had ever had, and the feeling sinks heavy in his stomach. I want him to leave more. He doesn't voice this, but it's clear in the way he holds Erwin tighter. “... Okay. Give me a moment.” He adjusts how he's sitting until he can start to work Erwin's underwear off of his thighs and then down his legs, where Erwin kicks them off. Levi draws back enough to just look, taking all of Erwin in. He was… Big , bigger than Levi expected, but… He felt sort of glad for them to finally see each other, fully, even if Erwin put Levi to shame. “... Jeez, blondie. We've only been kissing, and you're already getting worked up?”

“Can you blame me? Look at you,” Erwin breathes, chest heaving with his exertion. He had the audacity to even be flushed from the slight embarrassment of being mostly hard already, but he liked the way Levi stares, the way his eyes widened ever so slightly seeing him. He felt very liked. 

            It wasn't as if Levi wasn't also starting to fill out, too, but Levi didn't draw attention to that. Even if a part of him wanted to reach out and touch, he resists, getting off of Erwin's lap to instead lay on the bed. “... Come over here, instead. I want you to take the lead, if… That's okay. You can touch me however you'd like.”

            Erwin almost immediately takes the opportunity to crawl over to Levi, slotting himself between his legs and leaning down, pressing his lips to his in a heated exchange. He gets the courage to press his hips against Levi’s, feeling their cocks press against each other’s… And he lets out a soft sound against Levi’s lips, whining with the pressure. He leans back enough to admire Levi like this - body flushed, his own chest rising and falling with his excitement, hair beautifully framing his face. Beautiful. Erwin kisses him again before he trails his lips down, giving him another suck before he moves onto Levi’s chest, leaning onto his hand as he follows along the curve of his pec, eyes flicking up to meet Levi’s gaze before he playfully laps at Levi’s nipple. 

              “Er- Erwin …” Levi sucks in quick breaths, hardly able to keep his eyes on Erwin with where his lips were going. The tease at his nipple, a place he didn't even know he was sensitive, makes him shiver more than how Erwin's cock had rubbed against his. He keeps a little on the quiet side, but his face flushes a deeper red. “That's… hah. ”

            “Gorgeous,” Erwin murmurs before he cups his lips around his nipple entirely, giving it a hearty suck. He gently nips the skin around it before he moves onto Levi’s other pec, making sure to give it plenty of attention with his lips, too, before he starts to trail even lower. “...I want to admire you, Levi… Just tell me to stop if it makes you uncomfortable.”

            With that piece out of the way, Erwin trails down to put himself between Levi’s legs properly, slipping his arm under one of Levi’s legs. He leans over to gently kiss the side of his thigh, sighing before he finally focuses on what he really wanted. He wanted to show Levi just how much he loved him. He gently moves his hand to start gently stroking Levi’s cock as he gives his thigh a little more attention, sucking into the flesh of it, absolutely loving it. The sounds escaping Levi made rushes of heat pulse through him even more, going from his head straight down to his cock, which had filled out entirely by now. “ Mm. I wonder how you taste…”

              “ Fuck …” Levi tries his hardest not to squeeze his thighs around Erwin's head, but- well, maybe Erwin would like that. One of Levi's hands finds Erwin's hair as the other covers his own mouth, trying to keep his moaning more quiet. Erwin's hand practically swallows his cock, and there's nowhere for him to go. “How I- taste ? Erwin, what do you mean by that..? You're not gonna- use your mouth, are you?”

            “How else am I going to get you ready for me, sweetheart?” Erwin doesn’t like Levi covering his mouth, but there wasn’t much he could do with his hand busy with Levi’s cock. I want to hear more of him. He sighs softly before he gently bites Levi’s thigh, licking over the small teeth indent he left. “...Mm. I don’t have any lube, so I have no other choice… Maybe I should make myself drool just a little more, though.”

            Erwin grins when he sees Levi’s eyes widen at that, and he straightens up, moving his hand to Levi’s thigh in favor of taking Levi’s cock in his mouth. He takes a note of the flavor, tasting a little bit of soap - did Levi shower before tonight? - and a touch of salt, no doubt from the precum starting to leak out of the head. He loves the way he feels Levi squirm under him, and he lifts his hand to try and keep Levi’s waist pressed d own. He makes eye contact with him before he dips his head lower, slowly opening his throat more to Levi’s cock, and with a few passes, he’s able to nuzzle into Levi’s groin. He moans softly as he starts to bob his head, slowly, letting his lips drag teasingly along Levi’s skin, tongue lapping rather desperately around him. “ Mmh… ”

              “Oh, fuck …” Levi's head spins when Erwin forces his hips down, and even if Erwin doesn't say anything, the command is quite clear in his eyes. He immediately obeys, even if he wanted nothing more than to buck up into Erwin's mouth. “Erwin, I- nng… ” He bites into the meat of his hand to mute himself, his other hand gripping into Erwin's hair. He doesn't dare move the man's head himself, just grounding himself and following with Erwin's movements. His thighs tremble . "Erwin, that's- you're gonna, hng - make me cum too quickly like this…”

            “Mm?” Erwin pulls off of Levi when he says that, although… From the look in his eyes, he has no intention of stopping. Instead, he licks along the side of Levi’s cock, smiling a little. “So? That’s what I’d like you to do. I’m enjoying you tonight, Levi… I want to see every side of you, in the case that I don’t get to. You can cum.”

            With that, Erwin dips back down, taking Levi fully in his mouth. He decides to give the man a favor, removing his hand and letting Levi move however he wanted to, closing his eyes and letting out another groan. Come on, Levi. Cum for me. He meets Levi’s eyes again, almost like a challenge - Do it.

              Levi gasps as Erwin dives back in, his eyes rolling back in his head. His body was already rapidly reaching its peak whether Levi wanted it to or not. Now that Erwin wasn't holding him down, Levi's hips twitch and buck each time a particular wave of pleasure watches over him. He tenses and moves more frequently as Erwin edges him closer to his orgasm, his hand holding Erwin's hair tight.

            “Erwin, I-” He barely gets the words out before he's moaning Erwin's name, throwing his head back as his entire body tenses and his hips raise from the bed, pressing his cock into Erwin’s mouth. He'd never really touched himself before, and it made this orgasm feel powerful. The aftershocks have his entire body shaking , thighs quivering the worst once they relax from where they'd instinctually tightened around Erwin’s head. He slumps back against the bed once he's able to relax, gasping for breath. “ Shit …”

            When Levi finally lets go of his head, Erwin pulls off Levi, making sure to “clean up” Levi’s cock as he goes, letting the taste of him linger on his tongue. Bitter. Salty. Just like him. He smiles a little as he swallows, pressing forward to gently brush his fingers through Levi’s hair. “There you go, Levi… Just breathe. You did good,” he murmurs, trying not to let Levi’s amazing expression while he came linger too much… But he can’t really stop the image from being burned into the back of his mind, and Erwin felt like the luckiest man in the world. “You did good.”

             Erwin gives him the moment he needs to relax before he snakes his hand back down, gingerly touching Levi’s cock before he trails it down further. He sighs dreamily, finding Levi’s entrance before he pulls his hand back up, not exploring just yet. “Mm. How was that, Levi? Did I do good for you? You look like I did… Do I need to stop?”

            “ Mm …” Levi flinches when Erwin touches him teasingly, still overwhelmed and riding out the last waves of his orgasm. Even though they hadn’t gone all the way yet, Levi already felt closer to Erwin than he did before. There was something so intimate to Levi about what they were doing, even if it was just hands and mouths and tongue thus far. He takes a deep breath and meets Erwin’s gaze, trying to keep it together for a little while longer. “No, you don’t need to stop. But… I want to touch you now. I wanted to touch you earlier, but… I got nervous, and let you take the lead instead. But… I want to make you feel good too, Erwin. Just, uh… Not with my mouth.” Levi’s expression of bliss twists with a bit of disgust. “I might throw up, no matter how clean you are or how good you might taste.”

            “Heh. Don’t worry. I wouldn’t ask you to do that for me, as much as the image is nice…” Erwin’s teasing him again, smiling warmly as he leans down to gently kiss Levi’s cheek. He shuffles closer, straddling the man before he straightens up, taking Levi’s hand in his own. He gives it a squeeze before he guides it down to his own cock, hard and almost red after seeing Levi’s beautiful reaction to the blowjob. “Here. You can touch me however you want to. You can touch my chest, my back… Wherever you would like. I’m all yours tonight, Levi. Anything you do would make me feel good.”

            “Well…” Erwin's declaration makes Levi's mouth go dry, especially now that he has his fingers wrapped around his hardened cock. This is really happening. He tries his best to swallow, his breathing shaky as he takes a firmer hold, gently moving his hand up and down. He'd done this to himself only a handful of times, and it felt unfamiliar to be doing it to someone else. He stares at Erwin's cock for a while as his motions gain confidence, especially as everything gets slicker thanks to Erwin's pre-cum. Eventually, Levi gets the bravery to turn his eyes to Erwin's face, losing his breath the moment he does.

            Erwin looked… Stunning. The man's brilliant blue eyes hadn't left his face, and his cheeks were flushed with the exertion of getting hard. Levi can tell his lips are still on the swollen side from sucking cock, and there's a twinge of possession that settles in Levi’s stomach. He's like this because of me, and me alone. Levi squeezes Erwin's cock a little tighter, watching his face to see what he liked more.

            “... Mm.” Levi notices that Erwin’s breath hitched every time he swiped his thumb across the tip, so he wasted no time in ravishing it with extra attention. He loves how Erwin suddenly seems to lose his strength, finally losing a little more of his composure. Levi's free hand finally decides to roam, running over bare skin and squeezing muscles where he can. “You like that, right? Is it too much for you, blondie?”

              Erwin nods emphatically, letting out a soft gasp as he shifts his weight onto his arm. He hated that Levi was so observant - but he’d never felt someone’s hand feel so… Good. Maybe it was because it was Levi doing it and not himself. He used to dream about this moment, about Levi under him and Erwin having his way with him… But this was so much better than any of his dreams. Even if it wasn’t exactly as passionate yet, Erwin knew that once they started to get into it more, it would be the best night of his life. 

               “ Ngh. Levi…” he breathes his name as Levi keeps stroking him, almost trembling as he resists the urge to buck into Levi’s hand. His arm shakes slightly with the exertion of holding himself up, and he has to lean down a little further to keep himself from toppling over entirely. It gets Erwin closer to Levi - eyes gazing into his, seeing the way Levi’s eyes lit up seeing Erwin’s, the way his free hand seemed to show his affection by squeezing and loving his arms, his chest, his shoulders. It made Erwin feel so wholly loved. 

                 Erwin leans down and presses his lips to Levi’s, unable to help himself. He huffs into his lips, a clash of tongue and teeth and want, Erwin’s hips finally succumbing to his instinct and flexing into Levi’s hold. He lets out a soft whine, wincing as he pulls away. “ Fuck. Levi, I… I think I’m gonna cum soon.”

            “ Erwin …” Levi gasps against Erwin’s lips as they kiss, although it can barely be called that with the lack of lips actually involved- his hand slides up Erwin’s arm and cups his neck, keeping the man down against him despite how it seemed Erwin was trying to get away. Levi twists his hand as he speeds up a little more, desperate to see it, to return the favor. “ Good. I want you to. It’s only fair, isn’t it…? You got to see me fall apart before the main event, and now it’s my turn to see you fall apart. You look amazing right now… So I’m sure you’ll look even better.” Levi loves that Erwin finally lets himself buck into his touch. “So… Cum, Erwin, for me.”

            “ Mm… ” Erwin’s breath catches when Levi speeds his hand up, and his hand tightens into the sheets below him, trying to give himself some sort of grounding. He gazes right into Levi’s eyes, loving the way the man’s eyes scrutinized him entirely, feeling entirely seen. He touches his forehead to Levi’s before he’s forced to straighten up, feeling his muscles go taut, tensing with the pleasure as his climax builds up and up. He lets out a whine, thrusting into Levi’s twisting hand once, twice- and then he shudders as he finally cums, Levi’s name leaving his lips in an overwhelmed breath as cum spurts from his cock, coating Levi’s hand and his chest with the sticky white substance. He has to hold himself up, vaguely reminding himself that Levi wouldn’t like it if it smudged against him, even though his arm was full-on trembling under his weight, even more weak because of his orgasm.

            Erwin rides it out until he feels himself ebb into overstimulation, and he whines, wincing. He’d touched himself before, of course, but this was something new - he was usually a one-and-doner, but Levi continuing to flex his hand made his body jolt with the pleasure. “Levi… Levi, I… fuck. Please… I don’t know if I can hold myself up for much longer. It’s… So much. ”

            “Wow…” Levi's still a little in awe of what has just happened, deciding to be kind to Erwin and slow his hand to a stop. When Erwin's settled down a little, he pulls his hand back and looks at the mess Erwin had made. Because of me. He flicks his eyes up to Erwin's face before he tentatively sticks his tongue out to lick up some of the cum on his hand. He contemplates the taste for a moment, eyebrows scrunched. “... Mm. How did you swallow all of this from me? It's salty. ”

            Levi searches for something to wipe his hand off on, and cringes once he finds his shirt as the victim. When his hand is all clean again, he turns his attention back towards Erwin, raising a brow when he sees his expression. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

             Erwin had been staring dumbly at the mess he’d made on Levi’s stomach after he’d tried some of it, feeling a strange wave of… Possession wash over him. This was his mess. Levi was his mess, and Erwin was his. He meets Levi’s gaze when he talks to him before he sighs softly, straightening up and climbing off of Levi before he situates himself below him. He slides his hand along one of Levi’s legs before he lifts, putting it around his waist, urging Levi to lift the other. He feels a rush of need hit him, and his cock doesn’t soften much before he feels it throb again. Fuck. You do things to me…

              “There’s a bottle of lotion on my side of the bed. To your left,” he breathes, voice coarse, completely laying bare everything he left unspoken. “Grab it for me. And don’t clean yourself up. I’ll take care of it. I’ll take care of you. ” His hand digs into Levi’s thigh, eyes flicking up to Levi’s surprised expression. “You’re mine tonight. Not the program’s, not Winged Freedom’s. Mine. Don’t think about tomorrow. Think about me. Just me. Okay?”

            Levi's stunned into silence for just a moment, his heart thumping hard. He can feel it in his throat as he takes Erwin's words in. His. Think of nothing but him. Heh… That'll be easy, Erwin. “Okay. But if I think of no one else… Then you can only think of me. It goes both ways. If I'm yours, then you're mine. ” Levi squeezes his legs a little tighter around Erwin's waist before he sits up enough to reach over for the lotion. It takes a second for him to get it out, with the nerves starting to settle in, but he manages to hand it to Erwin without much trouble. “ Mm. This is the part where it gets serious, isn't it?”

            “Yes, it is.” Erwin’s gaze doesn’t leave Levi even as the man shifts focus to grab the lotion. He inspects the bottle to make sure it was unscented - it was, of course, since Erwin’s skin was usually sensitive - and he manages to pour some in his hand, lathering it up in his fingers. “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of you, Levi. If it hurts, just tell me, okay?”

            Levi settles back. It's times like these that Levi wishes he could always be in the Drift, that he could always know what Erwin was thinking, planning. Levi wasn't such a bad judge of character, and Erwin was usually an open book to him, but moments of uncertainty and unfamiliarity like this always had him feeling like he was off balance. He wanted to share their thoughts and feelings and be one like they were in the Drift. Still… As Erwin looks up at him, he starts to think that maybe this was just as good. They didn’t have to be in each other’s minds to feel like they were intertwined- That's just how they always were, especially now, especially here , together. Levi swallows his nerves and finally relaxes, nodding, letting Erwin see how he now had his full trust. I'm yours.

            Erwin nods back, gently brushing his fingers along Levi’s entrance. He’s careful as he pulls back, pouring just a little more lotion on Levi himself before he starts to gingerly inch a finger inside of him, sighing as he feels Levi tense around him. “Relax, sweetheart. This is the first time you’ve been touched here, isn’t it? Don’t worry. I’ll make you feel good,” he breathes as he manages to push a knuckle in before he pulls it out, doing a stuttering pace to ensure Levi was as comfortable as possible. “...How is it?”

              “ Hng …” The feeling was very unusual. It sent a unique spike of pleasure up Levi's spine, one he wasn’t quite expecting. Erwin's careful movement makes it easy to digest as he slips more and more into him, his breathing getting shaky as he finally feels Erwin's finger go all the way to his palm, already feeling like it was a lot. “It’s- It’s good. Not that bad yet. It's… A weird feeling, but it isn’t bad. Mm. I can tell when you get past the… Hard part.” Levi focuses on relaxing. “... do another.”

            “Mm. It’ll get better once I get you properly stretched out for me… Once I learn where it feels good.” Erwin wants to lean down and kiss Levi everywhere he could, just to encourage him to keep it up. Once he flexes his finger a little more, he starts to push in a second, finally feeling more of a stretch. “You’re taking my fingers well… Mm. Just breathe. You’re doing so well, Levi… Just for me.”

            Erwin’s breath hitches once he manages to get his two fingers in to the hilt, and he can tell it’s starting to wind Levi up a little. He watches Levi’s face as he starts to flex his fingers, pulsing them in and out at a slow, tantalizing pace, curling his fingers up . “How does this feel..? Does it feel better? I should focus on stretching you out more for now. I don’t know if you can take a third finger yet…”

            “Erwin…!” Whatever Erwin does with curling his fingers, it sends white-hot pleasure straight up his spine. He can't help but to tighten up around him, taken off-guard by the sudden press against such a sensitive spot. He presses the back of his hand against his mouth as he looks at Erwin, his body starting to work back into it now, especially with Erwin's lavish attention. “That- That… Felt good. Can you do it again..?”

            “Mm.” Erwin loves the way Levi sounds above him, feeling the way he clenches. Have I found it? He experiments by digging his fingers in once more, keeping his motions slow yet confident - and once he feels Levi tense at one particular spot, he smiles a little snidely before he focuses on it, pressing his fingers in a little hard. “Here? You should see yourself, Levi… Mm. I could eat you right up.”

           “ Shit , Erwin, that's- hng …” It finally seems to get Levi to get loud and squirm . The feeling it brings is unlike anything Levi had ever felt before, and his cock swells back to full hardness very quickly. By the time Erwin's worked him up enough to get three fingers in, Levi's a panting, writhing mess. Erwin's relentless, seeing how easily it loosens Levi up, and the poor man was struggling. “I can't, Erwin, please, it's- that's enough.” He tries to reach Erwin's arm to push him off. “I'm- I'm ready. For you. ”

           Erwin obeys diligently, wiping his hand on the sheets beside him before he aligns himself with Levi’s entrance, letting his cock get caught on it before he moves his hand to hold onto Levi’s hip. Every ounce in his body just wants to push in, especially being tempted with the small amount of warmth encroaching the tip of his cock, but he holds himself back. He has to be careful. “Okay. I’m gonna… I’m gonna push in. Tell me if it hurts. I’ll be gentle, I promise.”

           With a look of affirmation to Levi, seeing him almost desperate for it, Erwin starts to push his hips forward. He manages to push himself halfway in before he feels some resistance, and he grunts as he pulls his hips back, feeling Levi’s walls clench down on him. Then he’s pushing in again, slow, relishing the feeling before he manages to get himself to the hilt. “ Fuck, Levi… You’re so tight. How - how are you doing? Is it okay..? God, you’re so… Ngh. Tell me when I can move.”

            “Nng…” Levi holds Erwin as much as he can, pulling him close as he feels the man start to properly push in. Erwin's fingers prepared him well for the first part, but the second half is just pure bliss. It takes Erwin a second to get all the way in, but when he does, Levi feels so full . It's so hot, warm, hard, and he could swear he felt it throb inside of him. “Erwin…” Levi bites his lip, and just… Well, he starts to cry. “I…”

            He sniffles and holds Erwin tighter , bringing the man's forehead against his. It wasn't really a matter of being upset, or overwhelmed… He was just emotional. It was finally happening. They'd connected in every way that two people possibly could have, and he loved it. “... I love you.” He takes a deep breath, letting Erwin move away far enough to look at each other, his eyes shining with tears. “I love you so much. I'm sorry I- I'm sorry it's taken me so long to trust you for this. But I do. I trust you and I love you.”

            “Levi…” Erwin interrupts him with a kiss to his eyes, gently placing his lips on his eyelids, kissing away his tears. He digs his hand into Levi’s hip, squeezing it affectionately as he flexes his hips against Levi’s. This was everything he could have ever dreamed of. It felt better than he’d imagined, being so close, being one with him. It had him brimming with affection and love. “I love you, too. More than anything. I’m sorry, too.”

               I’m sorry tonight will be our only night together. Erwin doesn’t speak the last part, pressing his forehead to Levi’s again before he starts to move his hips, groaning as he feels a jolt of pleasure shoot through him. “Ngh… I love you. I love you, Levi,” he breathes, starting a slow, easy pace, relishing in the feeling rather than chasing any sort of finish. He wanted to enjoy it - enjoy Levi. “Levi… If - if we survive tomorrow, I’m going to marry you. You’ll be… Be my husband. And I’ll treat you to the life you deserve. We’ll have more nights like this… And a family. The family you’ve always dreamed of.”

            “Erwin…” Levi chokes on his own voice, throat tight with his tears and emotions. Everything he says makes Levi's head spin, trying to imagine that life while Erwin makes love to him. I want it… I want it so badly. But I have a duty… He takes several deep breaths, nodding, finally seeming to get his emotions more under control. “ When we survive tomorrow, Erwin. When we do, you- hah …you'd better get me a damn good ring with that Marshal salary of yours. And… shit .” Levi shudders, doing his best to actually focus on each press or Erwin's cock into him, despite how they were talking. ““You're so big …”

            “I’m - ngh, I’m plannin’ on it,” Erwin says, swearing under his breath as he starts to quicken his pace a little, making sure to show Levi how much he adored him. He pulls Levi down to press his lips against his cheek, his forehead, his neck, sucking a bruise into his skin as he digs his nails into his hip. “ Mm. You… You love it, though, don’t you? Can’t get enough… Suckin’ me right in, aren’t ya?”

            Erwin doesn’t even care about the fact his accent is slipping through, hand moving from Levi’s hip to grip onto the bed frame above his head, giving himself more grounding as he thrusts into him, letting out a loud groan. “ Fuck-! God, you’re eating me whole. So good to me… I love you, Levi. Just for me. Just mine. Does it - do I feel good..? ”

            “Yes- yes, you feel good…” Levi grapples at Erwin's chest, fingers tensing as they resist scratching at him. As Erwin picks up speed and starts to really fuck him, the tears return, but this time over how good it feels. “I just- It's so perfect, I…” He should be embarrassed, but he isn't- not in the slightest. “I… love it. I want to do this more. Do it again. ” Levi can tell he's starting to edge close to his orgasm, and he pulls Erwin into a kiss, breathing against his lips. “I'm close, ‘Win… Just a little more. ”

            “We will. We will, Levi…” Erwin kisses Levi right back, moaning into his lips as he thrusts in deep. He loves the way Levi’s legs close around his hips, locking him in. He shudders a little as he feels a wave of pleasure surge through him, signaling himself as close to his own orgasm, but he doesn’t stop - he can’t, not with Levi sounding so pretty and beautiful underneath him, begging him for more. “Cum for me, Levi. Can - Can I..? In- in you? You’ll have to let go of me if not, love… Ngh. Please…”

            “Erwin… Yes. Yes, you can- inside… please. ” Levi can't even begin to process all of his emotions, but- it feels good, and that's what mattered. He knew he'd find it disgusting the moment they were done with this, but at the moment, he wanted nothing more than to have Erwin fill him up. “I'm gonna… fuck , Erwin..!”

            Even though it's nothing intense at all , Levi squeezes tight around Erwin, overwhelmed by his second orgasm. This one was different from the first one, deeper, and it wracked his entire body with shudders. He can't help his moans and cries and pants of Erwin's name as the orgasm washes over him, making a mess of his skin, holding Erwin tightly like a lifeline. He could tell Erwin, too, was getting close, his hips losing their coordination and just seeking the pleasure of Levi's warm, slick hole. Please, Erwin…!

             “ Ngh… I’m-“ As if on Levi’s demand, it doesn’t take Erwin much longer to follow after him, pushing into Levi as he feels another orgasm hit him, much, much harder than his last. It felt like bliss, feeling Levi around him as he cums, even more pleasure shooting through him as he realizes he’s filling Levi up with him. Mine… Erwin leans up to press his lips against Levi’s, groaning into his mouth as he works out the rest of his orgasm, his hips slowly coming to a stop, pressing against Levi’s as he tries to ebb himself down. 

              Erwin feels on cloud nine. Even though they were both exhausted, sweaty, cum-covered messes, he felt that this… Wouldn’t get any better. Erwin didn’t have a lot of favorite moments in his life, having lived too many, but this… This easily made its way to the top spot. He gently kisses Levi’s cheek, slumping against the bed with him, his hand moving to brush through Levi’s hair as he tries to help the man calm down. “…mm. So… So good. You did so well, Levi. Perfect. Absolutely perfect, ” he breathes, leaning away just enough to gaze at him, inspecting his exhausted, fucked-out expression. “…you okay?”

            Levi was, indeed, fucked out. Two orgasms in a night for his first time with someone and Erwin underneath him, sweaty and his , and he was completely out of it. Having Erwin fill him up with his warm cum was a heavenly experience, leaving him light headed. He sucks in deep breaths, leaning into Erwin's touch, letting his eyes finally flutter back open.

            “... yeah. Yeah, I'm okay. Just…wow.” Levi laughs, breathless, leaning down into another, more gentle, kiss. “That… Was amazing, Erwin. Thank you. I don't think I've been this happy and relaxed in… forever. I'm glad that we could spend tonight together. To finally do this together.”

             Erwin hums into the kiss, keeping close when Levi pulls away. He touches his forehead to his, relishing in the closeness between them. Both of their chests shifting against each other’s, breathing hot and heavy, Erwin didn’t think life could get any better. Levi was his. Finally. 

              “Me, too,” he murmurs, nuzzling against him. Erwin couldn’t help but feel ecstatic, smiling warmly down at him, hand squeezing his hip gently. “You’re… Lucky we’ve done this now instead of back then. If I’d had the energy of a younger me, I wouldn’t have let you off so easily tonight. I could most definitely get addicted to this… To you.”

               Erwin likes seeing Levi turn even more red at that, somehow, and he gives him another kiss before he forces himself to pull Levi off of him, slipping out of him as he does so. He can’t help but look down, admiring the view for a moment before he slips his arm around Levi, helping get him to the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling? Are you able to walk..? I should get you cleaned up.”

            “Mm…” Levi grimaces at the feeling of Erwin’s soft cock slipping out of him, immediately feeling the disgust roll over him. He could feel Erwin’s cum leaking out, and now he was acutely aware of the stickiness across his stomach and thighs, and the dried tears streaked down his cheeks. He’s grateful for the help moving, because he suddenly wants nothing more than to be clean. “I don’t know. Let me try.”

            Levi uses Erwin for support as he first tries to stand, a little wobbly at first, but then he manages without any help. He looks back at Erwin for a moment, quickly embarrassed by how he must look- he hadn’t thought about what standing up would do to the mess between his legs, and as he feels it, he immediately reaches for his shirt- using it to cover up before he starts to wobble over towards Erwin’s bathroom.

            Erwin chuckles at just how sheepish Levi was, and he quickly follows after him, gently touching the small of his back before he holds open the door for him. Once Levi’s inside, Erwin closes the door and turns on the light. “Okay. Let’s get you cleaned up, then… Mm. Wish I had a bath, but the shower should do. I’ll get it warmed up while you get yourself comfortable. If you’d like, there’s rags in the cupboard,” he says as he makes his way to the shower, turning the water on. “Hot? Cold? I’m assuming you’ll want it steaming.”

              “Of course I want it hot. Are you crazy?” Levi scoffs. A cold shower sounded like a terrible idea, especially after what they'd just done with each other. He goes to get them a couple wash rags. “Just put it wherever you want, so long as it isn't freezing to death.”

              Erwin laughs, changing the temperature as Levi returns to his side. The shower between them lasts a while, filled with tender kisses and gentle touches as they clean up. When they're finally all cleaned up and cuddled in bed, Levi holds Erwin against his chest, running his hands through the man’s hair. It’s soft and sweet, and… Levi loves it. He knows they only have a few hours left until they were meant to save the world, but he wanted to live in this moment for as long as he can. Still, he can tell they're both getting sleepy, and they'd need the extra rest. 

              “... I can tell you're getting tired, Erwin. I think it's time we head to sleep, yeah..?” Levi brushes Erwin's hair back, rubbing his thumb across the man's cheek, holding him so, so gently.“I hope you know this moment's going to live in my mind for the entire time we’re in the Drift together. This… is perfect. I wish to have this for the rest of my life.”

            “...Me, too. You’d better not let it distract you, though,” Erwin teases, voice hoarse with his exhaustion, but he’s perfectly happy, nestled into Levi’s chest like this. He wasn’t expecting to spend his last night with Levi like he was, but he wouldn’t trade it for the world. He almost didn’t want to sleep, even though, logically, he knew it was the best choice. But… Laying here, in Levi’s arms, Erwin just wanted to cherish this last memory with him. He sighs softly, more tension leaving his body. “When we get home tomorrow, I’ll let you hold me like this for as many days as you want. No more Kaiju threats, or responsibilities… Just us. ”

            Erwin looks up at Levi, and for a moment, he feels a rush of emotions wash over him - too many to be able to decipher all of them. Still, he could feel the slightest warmth heat behind his eyes, telltale of tears, and he has to look away, wincing his eyes shut. Just cherish the memory you have with him now. Let it be the one you see last. “I love you, Levi. When… We get back, I want… To marry you. If we survive, I don’t want to risk losing you again. So… Marry me. I’ll… I’ll give you the best wedding you could ask for.”

            “Yeah… You'd better marry me after this. I didn't just lose my virginity to you for nothing. ” Levi huffs, returning to running his fingers through Erwin's hair, watching the man grow more and more tired. “But… seriously. I'd like that. After today, we won’t have to hide it any more. I'll make damn well to show off that ring, too.” Levi takes a deep breath, laughing a little at Erwin's goofy smile at his words. “... go to sleep, Erwin. I'll see you again at the end of the world.”

Chapter Text

            Levi is awoken to blaring sirens and flashing lights, throwing himself out of bed without a second thought. He's grabbing for his clothes while Erwin joins him out of bed. Levi's heart was pounding, and his throat felt tight. This is really it. He catches Erwin as the man goes for his pants, taking him by surprise. He swallows down his nerves and drags Erwin down to him, pressing his lips against Erwin's. “... I love you.” Levi means it more than he ever has before. “I have to run back to my room, but I'll meet you at Freedom, okay?”

            Erwin’s hand finds Levi’s hand, holding him gently as the man keeps him close. He leans down to take another kiss, selfish, before he nods, sighing softly. “I know. Be quick. I’ll see you at the Shatterdome.” He wants to say so much more, but he finds his throat choking before he can really muster the courage to, and he simply kisses Levi’s cheek as the man hurriedly goes out of his room. He shuts his door and lets out a soft sigh before he continues getting dressed, getting his pilot uniform on and ready to go out.

            Once he’s dressed up and ready to go, Erwin fetches his Winged Freedom jacket, quickly putting it on over his shoulders. It might as well have been the last time he was going to wear it - knowing the stakes of the mission, and the fact that Hange had predicted two Category 4s exiting the breach at the time of their arrival, there was no reason not to be safe. Besides, he liked the way that it smelled faintly of dust, of metal, of Levi. He sighs softly. Let’s get this done. 

            Erwin enters the Shatterdome soon after, nodding to a few workers who greeted him, before he meets up with Hange. She was clearly busy organizing the dispersion of the cadets. “General Hange. How did the test run go with the cadets? Did they pilot the Jaegers alright?”

            “Erwin! Yes, yes, they did. Exceedingly well, I might add. I would say Eren and Mikasa show the most promise - although Annie and Armin had the most smooth drift among them all,” Hange notes as she walks along the Shatterdome rafters, Erwin following diligently afterwards as his gaze flicks along the Jaegers. He could see the cadets already dressed in their uniforms, clearly excited for their first real Jaeger fight. I wish it could have been a Category 2 that they were going up against. “My predictions stay the same as last night, too, by the way. With the energy levels from the breach, you’ll more than likely run into two Category 4 Kaiju. Do try to keep them mostly intact, yeah? I’d like to still research them after you close the breach. They’ll be my last fresh specimen…”

            “No promises,” Erwin says honestly, gaze narrowing as he sees two of the cadets in some sort of argument - from this distance, it was hard to tell exactly who it was, but from the voices booming through the Shatterdome, it was safe to assume it was Eren and Mikasa. He sighs softly. They’re too green. They’ll die before they even reach the breach. But… We need the distraction to let me and Levi get there. “And Winged Freedom’s equipped with the bombs?”

            “Yes, sir.” Hange stops in front of said Jaeger, and with a pull of the platform lever, they start lowering down towards the loading bay, where the head of the Jaeger sat waiting for him - for Levi. “And I have those emergency bombs, like I said. You’ve got two of the nuclear ones strapped to your back - one should be enough to burst the breach in case the other goes defunct or missing, but if you lose them both, you’re on your own. Luckily, Freedom’s got that nuclear core. Escape pods should be working spiffy, too.”

            Erwin nods, adjusting his sleeve as they make their way into the head of the Jaeger. No sign of Levi. He sighs softly. “And you know the plan if this plan fails?”

            “Erwin - sir, ” Hange corrects, quickly pulling on Erwin’s arm, stopping the man in his tracks. She stares at him seriously before she sighs. “You’re asking too many questions. You’re starting to sound like me - the worry’s really getting to you, isn’t it? I’ve got everything under control on my end. You focus on taking care of the breach. I trust your mind to come up with a failsafe if our three other ones don’t work. So just… Calm down. You have to stay strong. For the cadets - and for General Levi. And you’ll make it back home alive. ”

            Erwin sighs, falling silent. Hange was right. He was freaking out - or, well, as much as he could. Even though he knew outwardly he wasn’t really showing signs of his panic, his desperation for reassurance was proof enough to those who knew him well enough, Hange included. He takes in a deep sigh before he nods. I know why. I’m not ready to die. “Alright. I trust you, too. Just… Promise me if I die and Levi makes it back that you’ll-”

H            e immediately shuts up when he hears Levi’s voice further down the platform, snapping at one of the other soldiers for presumably misequipping his gear. Erwin sighs again, but Hange holds his gaze, giving him a stern nod. “...I promise, Erwin. He’ll be taken care of.”

            “Thank you.” With that reassurance, Erwin feels a bit more steady as he turns towards the entrance of Freedom’s head, watching as Levi steps in. They make eye contact before Erwin nods, turning back towards his station. “Suit up. We leave in five.”

            “I'm aware.” Levi had already begun the steps to get ready, settling into his battle mode. It was nearly like flipping a switch for him, cutting off his concerns and focusing on what needed to be done. The drift would reveal his inner turmoil when he and Erwin connected, but at the moment, Levi's expression was ice cold against the pressure of the mounting battle. He steps into the foot couplings of the Jaeger as people rush around to get him fully suited up, running his side of the station until it's up and running how he wants it to. He looks over at Erwin as they prepare the drift sequence, a flash of emotion crossing his expression. “I double-checked with the Cadets. They're all good on the plan. Excited, even. They know we're throwing them to the wolves with these cat fours, and yet they're welcoming it. I had to yell at Mikasa and Eren, though. She wants to protect him… it reminds me of a certain someone I know..”

            Levi lets out a stressed breath, rolling his neck and shoulders as he’s properly connected into the Jaeger. No turning back now. “You've chosen some insane people, Erwin. Just as insane as us. So, in the end, I suppose you were right. They'd risk death just to save the world, same as me. Wish I'd seen it sooner. I wouldn't have been such a hardass to them this entire time.”

            “I told you. You should have more faith in them. And me,” Erwin says, teasing a little as he gives Levi a small smile, somehow able to muster it under the pressure of the situation. In all reality, now that Levi was standing at his side, Erwin felt as if he could tackle anything. He affixes the neuroconnector onto his head before he connects himself with the Jaeger, too. He feels a small pulse of electricity course through him before he nods, shooting a look up to the camera, knowing the feed was being transmitted directly to the control center. “Activate the Drift.”

            At his command, Erwin feels the Drift start up, and within a few moments, he can feel himself drifting into Levi’s mind, feeling his thoughts, his emotions, his memories. A few faint memories brush by, and the strongest one is the memory of their night together - fleeting touches, heavy kisses… It takes everything in Erwin to not cling to it, moving forward to complete the Drift. Left hemisphere calibrated.

            Levi closes his eyes and lets his feelings unload in the drift, knowing Erwin would feel everything and understand it, just as he always had. Despite their hiccup previously, the Drift feels strong. Stronger than it had ever been before. His own thoughts and memories of the night before are prominent on his mind, the thumping of his heart, the happiness and warmth filling his chest as they shared such an intimate moment. Erwin knew him wholly , inside and out, and he'd never felt more pleased for that. He lets out a deep breath as their minds successfully connect to each other and their Jaeger. Right hemisphere calibrated.

             Neural handshake complete.

            “Let's get this shit done .” 

            —+—

            “Moblit, I need your help with something.”

            Moblit looks up from his work as Hange rushes into the room, her arms full of equipment and papers, leaving a trail behind her of various things. He pushes his goggles up and picks up the mess behind her as she rushes into the back part of the lab. Moblit recognizes everything easily- he’d been the one helping Hange set it up in the last few hours before the attack. The Kaiju brain, floating in its tank, the drift equipment, laptops and screens hooked up to every possible way they could imagine measuring what was going on… They couldn’t have been more prepared with what little time they had to do this in.


            “Miss Hange… Are you really sure about this? I know you’re determined, but this could kill you.” He helps her fasten the last piece to the helm meant to connect her to the brain, the power suring in, lighting it up. Ready to go… “We can find some other way to do this, I’m sure.”

            “I’m very sure about this, Moblit. I need to do this. Can’t you imagine what we might learn? The pilots are readying to fight right now. It’s do or die for us all. Since I’m not out there fighting for humanity’s survival out in a Jaeger, the least I can do is this.” Hange flips several switches on the machine, listening to it hum to life. “Besides… I have you here. You can get me out if it looks like it’s too much, right?”

            “Right…” It doesn’t quell the worry swelling in Moblit’s chest at the idea, but he knew he wasn’t going to convince Hange otherwise, even if this entire plan was dangerous. Even he had to admit that the positives were heavily outweighing the negatives. “Well… Still, be careful. I don’t want to pull you out brain-dead.”

            “It’ll be fine. Have some faith in me!” She gives him a big smile as she pats his chest, finally getting situated in the chair. She takes a deep breath as she looks up at Moblit, and after a moment of consideration, she reaches up and grasps Moblit by the shirt, dragging him down to her. His eyes go comically wide as she kisses him, cheeks erupting into a dark red blush. She laughs as she lets him go, putting the helmet on. “That was for good luck. Press the button to start it as soon as I give you the thumbs up, Moblit!”

            “Y-Yes, miss Hange…” Moblit clears his throat and stands back up again, not even bothering to fix his rumpled shirt. He was more than a little stunned, but not enough that he’s distracted from his task. As soon as Hange gives him the thumbs up, Moblit presses the button in, watching as Hange plunged into the drift.

            For Moblit, it was only a matter of minutes- but for Hange, it felt like an eternity and an instant all at once. Flashes of the Kaiju world flooded into her brain, so much information - why they were coming, how they were made, what the Breach was- it was almost too much for one single person to comprehend. Still, she fought to stay conscious as long as she could, until-

            She felt seen.

            All at once, she felt known, like every being in this world was acutely aware of her existence. Predator spotting prey. The prey knew it was about to face the last moments of its life. Hange wanted out. She felt closed in on, her mind on the verge of having just too much -

            And then she’s free. The sequence is ended and the helmet pulled off of her trembling body, and she’s pulled into Moblit’s warm embrace as he cradles her, wiping at the blood leaking from her nose. “I’m here, Hange… I’m here. Are you okay? Your data just suddenly spiked, and-”

            “I’m… I’m okay. Wow. I saw everything, Moblit. They- they’re a hive mind. It’s amazing! They’re all clones, too- the- the bigger ones, the Precursors, that’s what they’re called- create the Kaiju, and then clone them, sending them after us. They’re trying to wipe us out so they can cross over and take our world for themselves. Moblit, it’s insane. ” Hange’s brain was racing a million miles a minute as she sorted through the information dumped directly into her consciousness. As she thinks more, she starts to fall quiet. “... Oh, no.”

            “Hange? Hange, what’s wrong?” Moblit immediately makes her look at him, but she seems fine. Her expression had turned into a look of concern, eyes unfocused for a moment until she looked at Moblit. “What is it? Is everything okay?”

            “Moblit, our plan to blow up the breach…” She swallows thickly, eyes wide with realization and fear. “... it's not going to work.”

           —+—

           Levi's nerves melt away when he and Erwin's Jaeger drops into the ocean with the other cadets. It still didn't sit right to send them ahead of Winged Freedom- but they needed the distraction, and she held the payload. They’d be forced to fight if a kaiju broke rank, or worse, killed the other pilots- but other than that, Levi and Erwin's job was to get to the breach and blow it up. Despite having been briefed on the plan numerous times, Levi felt antsy just waiting while the other Jaegers went out ahead of them. Green pilots. He knew Erwin sensed his disagreement with the plan, if the way he felt an overwhelming care within the drift was any indication.

            “It isn't right, Erwin.” Levi bites at his bottom lip, tasting blood. He could speak to Erwin through the drift, but… speaking out loud felt more real. “We're sending them to their deaths. Someone else should have taken the payload. Not all of them are going to make it back. They're just kids …” Levi's voice wavers. Winged Freedom's hand clenched into a fist. By now, the Jaegers had gotten far enough out that it was hard to tell if they'd engaged with the Kaiju yet. “... I wish I could have protected them. This needs to end. ”

            “Levi, gather yourself,” Erwin quickly says, his tone a little stern. “Remember what I told you. These pilots went into this knowing the potential consequences. They chose to do this so they could see an end to this, just as we have. Don’t underestimate them so quickly.”

            In all honesty, Erwin isn’t exactly privy of sending green pilots ahead of them to God knows what, either - and he’s sure Levi can feel his uncertainty through the Drift. As he feels the weight of Winged Freedom’s body trudging through the water, he knows that there were only two ways this would end for all of them. One, they would succeed and close the Breach, ultimately saving Earth from its sure demise… Or, two, they would see their own demise here, in this dark, desolate underwater wasteland.

            Erwin takes a deep breath. Focus on the mission. He knows his reassurance for himself is heard in Levi’s mind, if the way that the man’s emotions shudder in response to him are any sign of it. He shifts his gaze over to Levi, letting his eyes trace over the details of the man’s face, dedicating it to memory. “We are the most capable Jaeger pilots that the program has. If we were to fall first at the hands of the Kaiju ahead of us, then whoever holding the payload would have no chance of succeeding. We will succeed, even if it means utilizing their sacrifice in our favor.”

            “... I know.” Levi lets out a deep sigh, letting the tension melt out of his body. He knows Erwin is staring at him, thinking of him even now, so he turns just enough to meet his gaze. “We're the only ones who can do this. I understand the risk, and what needs to happen.”

            Erwin's attention is shifted to in front of them, especially as their console starts to beep - a warning that they were getting closer to Kaiju signatures. “We’re getting closer. Are you ready, Levi?” he says softly, and he extends a warm feeling over to Levi, trying to reassure him. “It’s now or never.”

            “I'm ready.” Levi’s sure his determination can be felt through the Drift. He's ready. An approaching Kaiju signature wasn't a good sign- it meant that the other Cadets would be getting pushed back. “What Category are they? They said two. Two cat 4's? They might be struggling. We should expect to have to assist in battle before reaching the rift- but the Kaiju should at least be weakened.”

            Winged Freedom starts moving forward against the current, knowing that if the other Cadets were engaging, it was time for them to move in for the second half of the plan. The nerves melt away as they get closer to the battle, and Levi sees the ensuing battle- damaged Kaiju and damaged Jaegers, engaged in a deadly battle. The amount of blue blood in the water is astounding, sending shockingly bright swirls around the feet of the fighting mechs and creatures. 

            Delta Rider and Vigilant Eye hang back like instructed, being the back-up for the ones fighting while also being extra protection for the main payload. Levi's glad to see that the Kaiju hadn't broken through the first line, with Hunting Boar and Dawn Breaker engaging one, while Great Discovery engaged the other. 

            “Cadets, status report!” Erwin shouts, activating the communications to contact the other Jaegers. He can’t help his heart stutter at the sight of such action, after so, so long. This was different from the category 2 they’d fought previously - this was a real fight. “ Now, cadets!”

            “We're doing fine here, Marshal!” It's Mikasa's voice over the radio to Winged Freedom, sounding breathless. They were handling the fight well, only partially damaged, but the Kaiju was doing much worse. A half-severed arm, a missing eye- It was clear they were going to be fine. “Hunting Boar and Dawn Breaker are struggling, though!”

            “We've- got this, Mikasa!” Reiner grunts, but Levi can tell that they're getting overwhelmed, even with two Jaegers. The Kaiju they were fighting was larger than the other, and their weapons were hardly doing any damage. Shit. It's going to- “Fuck, Bertholdt, we-”

            Levi's eyes widen as the Kaiju managed to get a hand on the head of Dawn Breaker while Hunting Boar was off balance. It uses just pure strength to crush through the metal, and Levi can't do anything but watch as it crushes half of the cockpit before Hunting Boar can drive its sword into its arm, making the Kaiju let go. Dawn Breaker goes down, and Levi knows at least one of the pilots had to have died. Shit …

            “Back line, watch out! Our leg's damaged, we can't keep up!” Winged Freedom readies as the Kaiju broke past Hunting Boar, diving straight towards them. “Delta, watch out!”

            Winged Freedom hurries towards Delta Rider as the Kaiju barrels into the Jaeger's chest, digging claws into the hull. Delta Rider unleashes an entire clip into its chest, but the thick skin barely has a mark. Winged Freedom was too far, and Levi yells in desperation as the Kaiju rips into the hull and crunches the Jaeger's head between its jaws. Levi feels the devastation at the death of such young pilots, then he feels the anger burn through his veins. “You motherfucker! ” Winged Freedom finally reaches the Kaiju, Vigilant Eye hot on her heels. “You're going to die for that!”

            “Armin, Annie, take the left flank! Levi and I will cover the right!” Erwin’s blood is pumping. He’d expected such losses, but he hadn’t expected them to happen so quickly- And feeling Levi’s rage pouring through his mind contaminates a majority of the logic overriding his head. Let’s take this fucker down, Levi, he says through the Drift, Winged Freedom’s heavy steps rumbling the chamber as they approach the Kaiju, which lets out a cry of fury as it swings towards Vigilant Eye, jaw splitting in two like some sort of vice as it prepares to bite down on Vigilant Eye’s extended leg, mid-stride.

            Follow my lead! Winged Freedom immediately pivots over, planting its left leg down firmly on the ocean floor. Levi, thrusters! Activating the thrusters, Erwin reaches up and pulls on a lever. “Deploying boot!” He can feel the confusion from Levi through the connection, but he reflects it with a feeling of confidence. Winged Freedom’s right leg, in tandem with Levi and Erwin’s movement of a kick, collides right into the Kaiju’s side. Their right foot immediately shifts, a blade extending from the toe, catching into the Kaiju’s armor, whereas the left foot clamps firmer down onto the ground, completely unmoving. The Kaiju lets out a screech, legs scrabbling for purchase against the ocean floor, kicking up sand and coral. Erwin extends his arm, grabbing onto one of the Kaiju’s vices. Levi!

            Together, they pull away the Kaiju’s jaw, revealing the sensitive flesh inside of its mouth. “Vigilant Eye! Now!” “Yes, sir!” Taking advantage of the moment, Vigilant Eye shoves its cannon inside of its mouth, and it only takes a moment to charge before it lets out a blast, the Kaiju’s body rumbling with the force of it. Immediately, the Kaiju goes limp, the flesh under its scales seeming to light up from the cannon blast, skin trembling as it moves throughout its body - and then immediately exploding out of its back, shattering its spine and sending its backplates through the water. As a precaution, Erwin extends his blade, pulling back just to drive it up towards the top of its skull, firm even as the Kaiju’s blood spills over their cockpit visor, obscuring a good bit of their vision.

            Erwin withdraws his arm as soon as he’s sure it’s dead. Good. Withdraw. We need to continue forward. Winged Freedom rises to its feet, and Erwin lets out a huff, already feeling his body start to feel overly exerted. The trek through the ocean was strenuous enough - but now, wrestling down a Kaiju and exerting as much strength as he could’ve to just hold it down, Erwin suddenly feels the fatigue start to wash over him. His vision gets a bit blotty, and he has to grit his teeth before he releases the boot.

             “New addition from the repairs,” he explains as he sees Levi look at him, trying to shift the subject. “I wanted to test it. It works. Let’s keep going. Vigilant Eye! Stick with us. If the Kaiju splits from Great Discovery, I want you to engage. We need to get the payload to the breach. Distract them. Levi and I will handle it from here. And… Congratulations on your first Kaiju kill.”

            “Yes, sir.” Annie’s voice comes through the comms, taut. Erwin can tell she’s focusing purely on the mission, especially with Dawn Breaker being down. Reiner and Bertholdt were her friends. If they’re dead, then… Don’t think about it. Focus. Erwin immediately starts trudging, ignoring the pulls of concern from Levi’s side. “Let’s go!”

            Erwin, we can’t put much more strain on you like this. Let me take more of the brunt of it. Levi himself was a little worn down from the attack, but he wasn’t struggling nearly as much as Erwin was. He could tell that the other man was putting up as much of a front as he could through the Drift, and Levi was piling on the concern, trying to break through to him. Don’t be afraid to lean on me. That’s why we’re doing this together. Don’t forget that.

            Despite the lack of response from Erwin, he can feel the Drift settling down again, and Levi’s satisfied enough with that. They continue towards the breach, and Levi’s satisfied to see that Great Discovery had all but taken out the other Kaiju. Levi was mourning the pilots lost, but he was relieved that at least some of them would be getting to come home. Hunting Boar was dragging it’s lame leg as it tried to get to the battle, but Levi immediately gets on the comms with them. “Hunting Boar, sit this out. You’re no use to us while you’re damaged like that. Provide cover fire if needed.” Levi cuts the protests off before they can get too loud. “I’m serious. Stay back and let us handle it, be a last resort! If you can, check on Dawn Breaker and Delta Rider. I’m not optimistic, but… Someone may have survived. Look for ejection pods.”

            Levi knew he was giving them false hope. Still, it was something. When Hunting Boar turns back to the other Jaegers, Levi gets Winged Freedom heading for the Breach again, so close now that he could nearly taste it. Winged Freedom starts sinking into the ocean, and Levi pressurizes the cockpit, the blue blood across their visor washing away in the waves. “... This is it, Erwin. We’re finally going to do this.” There were no more nerves for Levi. Not now. “We should get the bombs primed, and-”

            “Marshal Smith! General Ackerman!” Levi startles at the loud voice suddenly over the intercom, not expecting Hange of all people. Winged Freedom slows in her pace towards the breach despite being within sight of it. “We- We have a problem. Our plan isn’t going to work.”

            “What?” Erwin’s voice booms through, finally speaking up. It’s clear he’s already frustrated from his inadequacies, but to hear Hange’s voice say something he completely didn’t expect… “What do you mean? You said your calculations were nearly perfect. Our plan was fully hinging on your propos-“

            “I know, I know- I was wrong about my theory, but I know now! You won’t be able to blow the breach up from the outside like this. It’ll just reform, and then you’ll have wasted the bombs.” Hange’s desperate, speaking quickly, breathless. “When I drifted with the Kaiju brain, I saw how their world works. The Kaiju all have a genetic code that the breach reads so that something can go through. It’s why all of our previous attempts to penetrate the breach have been unsuccessful.”

“So you’re saying the only way this can work is if we get inside the breach?” Levi hisses. “That’s impossible, Hange! I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we aren’t a Kaiju!”

            “I know, Levi, but the thing is- you can go back for one of the category 4s. If you bring it with you to the breach, it might read the data and-”

            “Quiet! Something’s coming through the breach!” Erwin interjects, and the fear that shoots through him makes the whole Jaeger shudder to a stop, despite Levi’s hesitant response to do the same. He can only stare in horror as some sort of creature - bigger than he’d ever seen, even in recordings of the other Kaiju appearances - crawled through the breach, claws the size of ships and fangs even larger than that. Its jaw clearly looks like it’s meant to bite, jutting out from its skull, where malicious, glowing blue eyes stared right at them. At Winged Freedom. Immediately, Erwin deploys his sword. “Moblit! What class?!”

            “... Shit.” It’s Moblit’s voice over the intercom now, and Levi doesn’t have to be told to know exactly what that means. “Marshal, that’s… It’s coming through as a category 5, sir. It’s the strongest one we’ve ever seen. But if you can get to the breach, or kill it…”

            “... Well, it’s worth a shot. Thanks for the information.” Levi cuts the communications for the moment, looking over at Erwin. “This is it, Erwin. Our last push to save humanity. Think we can take on a category five by ourselves?”

            Erwin doesn’t have to speak to communicate his feelings to Levi. The man was petrified. Despite the fact that he’d spoken up a big game earlier, now he was standing face to face with that . He and Levi had faced category fours together - he knew they could take them on. But a five? It has his blood boiling with his fear, joints locked as he tries to settle his breathing. It was here, now, gazing into the eyes of death, that Erwin felt the most human he’d ever had. He was just human. He would die. Levi would die. 

           …Erwin didn’t want to die.

           Looking over at Levi, Erwin meets the man’s gaze, and he’s surprised to see the pure certainty in his expression, the man’s confidence radiating through the Drift. Even though he could feel Levi’s fear, too, the man was so sure that they’d win. Of course he was. He was Levi Ackerman, the best Jaeger pilot the world had ever seen. And even though Erwin definitely contributed to his track record, he wasn’t nearly as good of a pilot as Levi was, especially without his arm. But here, gazing at Levi, the man’s confidence in him was all he needed. 

             I’ll keep you alive, even if it’s the last thing I’ll do. 

             “Rip and tear, ” Erwin says, and a sort of ironic smile finds its way on his face, full of his newfound confidence and fear and everything he was feeling. Despite it all, the adrenaline he was feeling was the best thing in the world. “Even if it means Great Discovery needs to lug our Jaeger’s core to the breach, we’ll rip apart this kaiju and tear that breach asunder. These monsters won’t get humanity. They won’t get you. But … Promise me that, no matter what happens, you’ll get that damn bomb to the breach. Promise.”

            Levi’s lips purse, not liking the underlying tone to Erwin’s words. Still… He knows what Erwin means. This was do or die. No matter what happened, someone was going to blow this god-forsaken breach up. “... I promise, Erwin. You know I will. But you promise me the same, okay? No matter what, this ends today. ”

            Now, the kaiju was nearly fully out of the breach. Just the sight of it was enough to cage Levi’s heart in fear, but he pushed past it, taking a deep breath. “Vigilant Eye, Great Discovery- we’re going to engage the category five kaiju! I need you both to get one of the kaiju carcasses close to the breach, in the case that we aren’t able to defeat this one, or we die trying!”

            “Yes, sir!” Vigilant eye hesitates for only a moment before turning back to go to where Great Discovery was with the other kaiju’s body. Levi knew that they would have wanted to help, but this was something that he and Erwin would have to handle themselves.

            Levi doesn’t let the kaiju get any closer before Winged Freedom charges, sword deploying. He can feel Erwin there with him, together as one through the jaeger, and he was determined for both of them to make it out of this alive. The kaiju swims towards them, claws outstretched and jaw unhinging. “Dodge left! Now !”

            The kaiju narrowly misses them, but Winged Freedom swings her sword around, managing a deep cut into the exposed underbelly of the beast. It doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest- it just whips back around, clawing at Winged Freedom. Levi struggles to get their arms up in time to minimize the damage to their hull, grunting at how strong the kaiju was. Its claws left deep gashes in their armored plating, and he knew they couldn’t keep it up for very long. Erwin, use our core to burn it! Erwin understands, ignoring the way their jaeger strained with the attack as he heated up their core. The kaiju screamed as it burned into its skin, damaging its claws- and it withdrew just long enough for Winged Freedom to gain her footing again. Damn. It’s already-

            A heavy object slamming into their side takes Winged Freedom off balance. Levi’s eyes widen as he realizes what it was- the kaiju’s tail, reminding him greatly of an ankylosaurus, had just slammed into them. Warning signs of crushed and damaged parts flash over his vision, but they don’t have much time to think about it before the kaiju was swinging it back again. “ Shit , we need to catch it!”

            Winged Freedom barely gets her hands up in time to catch the swinging tail, immediately getting knocked back. They “catch” it, slowing the blow, but it still crushes against their hull. Levi cries out at the pain shooting through his body, feeling like every rib in his chest had just cracked. He manages to keep his head enough to deploy the sword again, stabbing into the tail. “We need to- deploy the boots again! Keep it in place long enough to saw its damn tail off!”

            “Levi, no! It’s rearing around-” Erwin can barely get a word out, watching in horror as the kaiju whips around with a speed and flexibility he’d never seen from a kaiju before, and before he can call out in warning, it closes its jaws onto the left side of Winged Freedom’s helm, its teeth puncturing straight through to the cockpit as if it were a stupid soda can, the ocean water streaming in through the sides of its face. Its teeth hook onto the Drift machine, and Erwin can feel the terror jolt through Levi, shaking him almost instantly.

            It doesn’t seem to realize it has Erwin yet, and despite the man being almost torn from the Drift, Winged Freedom stood strong. “Levi!” Erwin calls, scrambling to undo his fastenings to the machine, but it’s fastened tight onto him, likely from the machine seizing due to the sudden loss of power. His eyes meet the kaiju’s fangs holding onto him, and he feels a sudden rush of confidence, of adrenaline. Hanging there at the mercy of the kaiju’s fangs and the machinery of Winged Freedom, Erwin understood what he needed to do.

            It felt as if it’d been so long, but everything was in slow motion. It had only been a mere moment. But, to Erwin, that moment was all he needed.

            “The payload!” Erwin yells. “Deploy it in its maw! It’ll get it to - to bite! It’ll ignite! Use it to - to get through the breach! Winged Freedom’s core- it’s nuclear! Use it!” 

            “ What? Erwin, no, I- I can't- it'll kill you if you're still alive..!” Levi's desperation and terror run rampant as he processes what was truly happening , trying to reach out to Erwin. “Erwin, I-”

            “Just do it! You promised me!” Erwin clenches his fist and feels Winged Freedom feebly creak in response. He makes it reach up, pushing against the kaiju’s head, forcing it to withdraw momentarily before it bites even harder. This time, it bites the side of the hull clean off, water rushing into the cockpit even faster. Erwin stares at Levi, at his shock, before he gives a stern nod.

            Win. For me.

            Suddenly, the drift gets cut off, Erwin’s fear and overwhelming confidence in him immediately leaving Levi’s mind. The kaiju pulls out, taking Erwin with it as it tore the metal away from the helm, the man’s yells disappearing as the ocean water clouds Levi’s vision. No. No! Erwin!

            Levi only gets a split second of clarity to realize what had happened before the neural load of suddenly having to pilot alone comes crashing down on him. He lets out a bloodcurdling scream as he's suddenly alone , his systems crashing from the sudden influx of saltwater, his body aching and head splitting open. Even still, Erwin's final words echo in his mind amongst the chaos and the strain, and Levi forces himself to pilot. Echoes of Erwin's pain still linger, but Levi focuses on a different emotion- his devastation. He pulls out all his anger, his rage , forcing his body to move.

            “Take this , motherfucker!” Levi yells as he unlatches the payload, shoving it into the kaiju's maw as far as he could, with as much strength as he could muster. Everything hurt. His brain felt like it was going to explode in his own head. But he pushes through, his eyes on the part of the helm still caught in the kaiju's mouth. There's a sick satisfaction when the kaiju looks pissed. “... this is for Erwin.”

            The kaiju hisses as the bomb stops its jaw from biting on the rest of Winged Freedom’s helm and crushing it altogether, rearing back from Levi’s desperate slashes of his sword. A few explosions seem to make it stumble back even farther - Vigilant Eye’s cannon, by the direction of the water streams the missiles came from. The kaiju roars, biting down on the bomb just as Erwin had predicted, and suddenly, Levi’s vision is lit by the bright explosion of the bomb, shockwaves rippling through the water. Now! Grab it and go!

            Before his body can shut down, Levi stabs the kaiju with his sword and puts all of his force into running at the breach- he didn't care if this thing was alive or not. A bomb to the face should have done enough for what he needed to do. The pressure of the ocean around him made it feel like his bones were getting crushed, his head faint, but he couldn't quit. He could nearly taste it. He makes a desperate reach to engage the thrusters just as the kaiju starts to writhe in his hold, and then-

            They were falling.

            Levi's awe in what was happening couldn't last long, not as the kaiju started to rip at the helm again, half of its face missing. How is this thing still alive?! Levi almost couldn't do anything else. He could feel the blood dripping from his nose, even in his suit, the way his body was slowing. He just had to make it a little farther-

            The kaiju shatters a part of the jaeger, sending debris and glass across the cockpit. Levi's thrown, barely staying within his couplings. In a desperate last attempt, Levi thrusts his sword up with all of his might, watching as it finally, finally cuts directly through the skull of the kaiju. He watched the light bleed out of its eyes, and Levi had no remorse.

            He cuts himself off from the drift. Everything hits him all at once , and he's practically just floating in the depths of the Jaeger's cockpit as it sinks further and further into the breach. Get up. Move. You have to start the meltdown. Erwin … Levi struggles to move. His leg was crippled, that much he could tell. It was hard to swim. He could barely see out of one of his eyes, and he hadn't even realized until then- but the inner pane of glass to his helmet had shattered. The pain of the drift had overshadowed everything else, but now he was stuck with only his own body to think about.

             Just have to… Levi manages to get himself over to the manual override, his hands sluggish as they input the code and start the reactor meltdown. He can see the other world through the missing part of the helm, and he knew that if he didn't hurry… He'd meet a far worse death than what Erwin had. The pods. Have to- make it to the escape pod. There was a part of Levi that wanted to stay. If he died, then… wouldn't he get to reunite with Erwin? The thought makes him hesitate. One of the pods was clearly damaged, but the other… It was usable. No one would blame him if he chose to stay.

            … But Levi finds himself engaging the escape protocol, letting Winged Freedom use the last of her remaining power to load him in. Everything was beginning to get hazy. He was rather sure he was out of oxygen. But… he'd fulfilled Erwin's wish, hadn't he? He'd done it. He'd delivered the payload to blow up the sons of bitches, and he'd lived. I did it, Erwin. Then, he sends some final words to the thing that had protected him for so, so long.

             Thank you, Winged Freedom. 

            Levi had long passed out by the time his pod had ejected, and the reactor melted. The explosion propels his pod up, through the breach, and it was the last thing to come through before the breach collapsed in on itself, sealed.