Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The crackle of heavy rain thumping on every available surface is audible as the car slowly pulls into the driveway of the house.

A million droplets falling from the sky meeting their timely demise on the shingles of the roof.

The door clicks of the car open and Dr. Daniel Cain quickly rushes in and out of the downpour, seeking the shelter of the front patio.

The few seconds in the rain was enough to nearly drench him entirely. His hands slipped over the the cool metal doorknob as he maneuvered the key into the opening and turned.

His boots thump into the threshold.

“Herbert!?” He called out.

No response. As expected

Herbert was likely locked up in the basement of their shared home, conducting experiments only god knows the nature of.

Dan shut the front door, and walked straight to the bathroom. He peeled off his wet coat and scrubs as the rain poured on outside the window.

He slid into a more comfortable getup of a sweatshirt and sweatpants after a long hot shower.

His shift at the hospital that day was 12 hours long, and the amount of stains on his scrubs was telling of the activities he had transpired in.

The doctor plopped on the couch, the pillows fluffing up beneath him, and switched on the television.

Some mindless sitcom babbled with a fake laugh track that erupted in chortles every corny joke the actors made.

Dan wasn’t the biggest fan of this particular show, but he needed something to turn his mind off for a few moments.

Suddenly, the door that led down to the basement creaked open and Dr. Herbert West walked out.

Dan turned his head around to look at his roommate, “Hey, I see the beast has emerged from his cavern,” He jokes.

Dr. west was wearing his classic dress-shirt and tie combo, paired with jet-black slacks and shoes. The guy was like a cartoon character.

Herbert rolled his eyes and chuckled as started to stride across the living room and kitchen to his bedroom. (Which could hardly be called that because the man hardly ever used the bed)

“I’m hardly a beast, Dan,” He quips.

“…hardly” West adds as he opens and shuts the door to his bedroom.

Daniel turns his attention back to the TV as another “hahahahahahahaha” runs in response to a man covered in whipped cream running around a playground.

Brief sounds of shuffling omit from the side of the room which West’s bedroom is located. The door opens after a few minutes and he steps out with a bundle of papers in his hands.

He is about to make his way back to the basement, when Dr. Cain makes an offer:

“Hey…Herb…would you like to watch TV with me?”

Herbert stops in his tracks, and turns to face the couch where Daniel is sitting.

“Hmmm…” He inquires.

“You don’t have to, I get that your work is important and everything,”

Herb inhales and ponders the request.

“…give me a moment Dan,”

West continues his pace into the basement and quick taps are heard down the steps. After a moment the taps begin again but back up.

For the second time that night, the door to the basement creeps open.

Herbert makes his way to the couch and he sits himself next to Dan.

Cain’s eyebrows raise up and his eyes widen. Herbert doesn’t usually accept his invitations for…normal human behavior. But the comfort is welcomed nonetheless.

The sounds of the television paired with the wet droning of the rain was relaxing, and Dan could feel himself sinking lower into the soft couch.

On top of that, Herbert and Daniel were very close together. Since the very beginning, The two men had been attached at the hip; Dan would never forget the time after they had re-animated Dean Halsey, and Herb pulled his arm and hooked it like he was a trophy wife when he was explaining their cover story to security.

Dan had found his roommate’s physical chumminess off-putting at first, but he slowly grew less stiff and found himself flowing into the interactions with ease.

Right now, Dan has his arm draped over the top of the cushions of the couch, with Herb’s head resting on it. Their hips and thighs were touching, and their feet overlapped the others leg.

For a while, things were peaceful.

Until Herbert tensed up out of nowhere.

“Herb…what’s wrong?”

West rapidly stood up and paced towards his room.

“I…uhh…”

Beads of sweat flowed down his forehead, and he was slightly shivering, like it was cold outside and he was a wet kitten.

“Forgive me, I have something to take care of,”

He entered the room without another word.

Dan sat there on the couch, slightly in shock.

What the fuck was that about?

A shrill crash and a muffled “fuck” informed Dan of what was going on.

Dan sighed and slowly stood from where he was sitting. He steps over to Herbert’s room, and turns the doorknob.

He finds the doctor kneeling on the floor, shaking and dripping with sweat.

A broken container of re-agent is on the wooden planks. Tiny shards of glass are scattered, and the neon green liquid oozes into a puddle

Herbert has a syringe in one hand and a band tied around the other, right above the elbow.

“Dan! Could you please assist me? I need- ah!”

Herbert jerks his hand off the ground, and a tiny amount of blood flows off his palm. The dull red ichor contrasts the bright green re-agent as it drops to the floor.

“Herbert…” Dan lulls as he slowly kneels down in front of his roommate, carefully maneuvering around the glass. He takes The injured hand of Herbert into his own. His eyes examine the wound as West says:

“I need another vial of re-agent, and quickly,”

His hand was trembling in Dan’s.

Cain looked up at Herbert, his eyes had a look of desperation and exhaustion.

A wave of…something…washes over Dan.

“…No, Herbert.”

“Don’t be ridiculous Daniel.”

“I’m not being ridiculous, you’re injecting yourself with a substance that is able to literally bring back the dead just to keep you from sleeping!”

“Oh please,” Herb hisses. “It’s perfectly healthy and more importantly efficient.”

“I’m not doing this for you,” Dan tell him. “Look what it’s doing to you, your-“
“What about my work!?”

“Your work, can wait. Your body cannot. I’m not letting you hurt yourself like this any longer.”

“Fine.” Herbert slowly and shakily gets to his feet. “I’ll get it myself.”

“Oh no you won’t,” Dan stands and grabs Herb by the shoulders.

“Try and stop me.” He threatens.

Not much of a threat. Herbert has never been able to overpower Dan, and is definitely not able to do so now, in this state.

The two struggle for a while. Well, more like Herbert struggling as Dan easily overcomes him. The glass under their shoes crunches as they step around, and West finally goes limp in Dan’s arms. Thick tears stream down his cheeks, and Cain pulls him out of the danger of glass shards as he slides to the ground.

The tears were a surprise to Daniel, he hadn’t realized that Herbert felt that he needed it that much, but he was determined to succeed in this endeavor.

“Dan think about this!” He says through sobs,

“The withdrawal, the, the,”

“Shhh…” Dan soothes, and hugs him to his chest.

“It’s going to be okay.”

A few moments pass, the television is still running, and the rain continues to fall.

Herbert sniffles and forms a small sentence.

“Okay, *sniff* I’ll stop.”

“Good.”

“But, it’s not going to be pretty.”

“I figured”

West sits back and makes eye contact with Dan

“Symptoms probably include, headache, fever, I might start vomiting blood, I will start vomiting period. Body aches, chills, fatigue, night terrors, depression, murderous thoughts-“

“That’s enough.”

“Although there’s no way to know for sure, you’re going to need to document all my symptoms and how they proceed.”

“Yes,” Dan rolls his eyes. “I will”

“…I’m frightened Danny,”

Daniel pulls him back in to a hug.

“Me too, Herb…but it’s going to be alright,”

Chapter Text

Saying Herbert is sick would be like saying the pacific ocean is “pretty big”

The first two days were the worst:

Dan had to walk back and forth between the bathroom and bedroom every 30 min to pour out the vomit bucket.

Herbert had a high of 101.8 degree fever, and Dan had to replace wet rags on his forehead and give him Tylenol to attempt to ease the fever.

Despite the fever, West was shivering in the duvet and blankets.

The bedsheets were covered in sweat, vomit splatters, and blood.

Dan would need to burn these and buy new ones eventually.

Whenever Herbert slept, Dan would too, until he was awoken by screaming from presumed night terrors.

Even though Herbert couldn’t talk, Dan could infer that he was not doing well.

All Herbert could do was grunt and moan and sometimes cry.

Dan cared for him the whole time.

When things were first starting, Herbert had limped to the bed in his work clothes, and lied down. Dan wasn’t about to let him lie in bed with his slacks and tie, so he dug through West’s closet in search of…anything that could be considered remotely comfortable.

He was met with the realization that his closet was diverse as Charlie Brown’s.

The guy really was a cartoon character.

Dan left and returned with a pair of sweatpants and a Tshirt that he tried to hand to Herbert, but he was still shivering like crazy and was in no state to stand up and change.

“Hey, Herbert. Can you sit up? Just for a few minutes?”

Herb followed his orders, and gingerly pulled himself up, leaning his head against the bed frame, eyes squeezed shut.

Dan reached up and unbuttoned his already sweat soaked dress shirt. He had already loosened and taken off his tie as per Dan’s request.

Dan led his gentle hands to pull off the white material, and moved to his slacks.

The touch of Dan’s hands seemed to soothe him, and after Dan pulled the shirt onto him, Herbert’s eyes eased open.

The pair peered into each others eyes. Their faces were so close together…

A moment passed, then Dan broke the silence by clearing his throat.

“Uh, I’m going to get you some water,” He said and abruptly rose from the sheets.

He turned his head away to hide the bright shade of red it was slowly turning.

On the 5th day, Herbert is able to stomach small amounts of bland food, and can finally talk again in equally small quantities.

Dan has changed his clothes and sheets for the first time (he found a nice dump to throw out the old ones ashes in) and gone to the store to grab proper sleep attire for Herbert.

Dan had carried him off the bed and onto a small nest of pillows, where he sat and waited for Dan to finish.

He had been able to briefly stand with assistance from Dan to change into new clothing, and the interaction had once again seemed to soothe Herbert.

Now, Daniel was preparing a cool wet rag to place on Herbert’s forehead.

“I feel like the very thing I conquered” Herbert remarks, his voice was raspy and low.
“…death?” Dan replies, as he places the rag on his forehead.

“Hmmm” West closes his eyes and exhales in response.

“What did you expect? You created the world’s most powerful stimulant and injected it into your veins on a daily basis. Not to mention you hardly ate, drank anything other than jet black coffee, and god forbid you sleep for an hour or two”

Dan collapses back onto the stool he had set up by the bed.

“ughhhh yes, yes, I did this to myself.”

A silence settles over them. Herbert inhales, flutters his eyelids ups, and manages a quiet:

“Thank you, Dan,”

“…sure thing Herb,

West winces and squeezes his eyes back closed.

“Headache back?”

He nods. Daniel rises up from his stool.

“I’ll be right back with some Tylenol,”

Cain walks out of the room and to the bathroom, grabbing some pills. Then to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. The droplets splash into the cup and remind him of the night he convinced Herbert to ween off the re-agent.

When he returns to the room, he finds Herbert breathing peacefully in and out. His arms relaxed and hair ruffled.

As Dan walks over and sets down the pills and water, he can’t stop thinking about HOW DAMN CUTE HERBERT LOOKS RIGHT NOW.

Which was…puzzling…

Dan had never labeled himself as a homosexual before, had he?

Although one time in undergrad in a drunken stupor, he had made out with a faceless nameless man in the walk in pantry of some frat house. An experience he hadn’t entirely despised.

But he still loved women, he knew that for sure. He had loved Megan, and girls before that as well.

This is not the time for a sexuality crisis Dan, pull yourself together! He thought to himself.

Besides, he begins, there’s no way I’m in love with Herbert fucking West

As soon has the name crossed his mind, it’s real life bearer began to stir in his sleep. He started to make quiet muffled noises, and his eyebrows scrunched together. Herbert moved around onto his side, facing Dan.
Dan grabbed the wet rag that fell off his forehead, sat on the bed by Herbert’s hip, and started to run circles on his back, a ritual he had performed many times in the past few days.

As Herb began to calm, Dan felt himself reaching for Herbert’s face, and moving his dark hair aside from his eyes and gazing at his face. Herbert seemed to smirk in his sleep at the touch, which made him realize how he was acting.

Daniel hastily yet silently stood and started to make his was towards the door, when he heart quiet muttering and looked back at Herbert.

He was mumbling nonsense mostly, but one thing stood out.

“…Danny…”

Danny practically ran out of the room and slammed his back against the hallway wall, hands over mouth and face. He slid down, his knees bending towards his torso as he panted quietly.

His heart was racing, pounding, in his chest, like the rain from that fateful day.

One of his hands gripped his shirt as he hunched his head with his mouth still covered, and his face was heating up by the second. The man’s eyes were wide as saucers and he tried to steady his breathing.

He was in love with Herbert fucking West.

Chapter Text

The golden sun slowly pools out the window on the 8th day of Herbert’s withdrawals, and he was feeling a lot better.

What little color there was before had returned to his face, he only seemed to vomit every 6 hours or so, and his energy had ramped up dramatically.

The afternoon was spent watching TV on the couch and playing cards at the kitchen table, and now Dan and Herb were sitting on Herbert’s bed just…chatting.

Dan couldn’t help but realize his heart dancing every time Herbert smiled, made contact with him, looked at him, was around him…he could go on.

Every time he thought about Herbert his face flushed and his cheeks pulled into an giddy grin, and if Herbert complained about a symptom he would do anything in his power to make sure that the ailment would expel itself from his body.

“Wait, you’re telling me, that before today, you have never seen Star Wars??”

“I don’t know what to tell you Daniel,” Herbert told him. “I don’t have time for your so- called,” He put up two pairs of peace signs, “‘simple human experiences,’” and bent the tips of his fingers down.

The movie happens come up on channel 7 while they were watching TV.

“I mean, I didn’t think you were that much of a…” Dan paused to think of an adjective,

“Corpse.”

“HAH”

Herb belted a short laugh an playfully shoved Dan, who, in response, dramatically fell backwards onto his back, which made him chortle even more.

Dan couldn’t stop smiling, and his comment wasn’t even that funny.

“Hey,” Herbert started, “I would probably be an actual corpse if it wasn’t for you, Dr. Cain.”

Dr. Cain sat back up so fast he may have just seen stars. Herb was sitting cross-legged across the bed, staring.

“I mean,” Dan reached up and rubbed the back of his own neck.

“I wasn’t about to force you to quit, and not deal with the consequences. Besides, it was no biggie.”

“I was a ‘biggie’, Dan,” Herb’s lips stretched to reveal his teeth on ‘biggie’.

“If not for you, I would have choked on my own vomit 8 days ago…Anyway what I’m trying to say is…”

Herbert reaches up and fiddles with the side of his glasses.

“I’m very grateful for you, Danny.”

Dan’s heart just about ceased beating in that instant.

Daniel Cain and Herbert West stayed trapped in that moment for a long few moments, just gazing into each other’s eyes.

The sun was at the perfect angle for a dramatic blanket of light to bathe the room in riches.

Herbert looked so beautiful.

“Herb I-“

“Dan I-“

They both hesitated.

“You go first, Herb.”

Herbert paused, then began:

“Something is happening to me. I don’t know the specifics, but it feels like a magnet in my chest is drawing itself to yours. I don’t know what to make of it. I can’t get you out of my head, Dan.”

He pulls his hands together in his lap.

“And every time I do think about you it’s like I get a rush, but it’s more exhilarating than any time I’ve taken the re-agent. And you’re in my dreams too, now that I have them and the content of those dreams are quite…”

One of them goes to run through his hair.

“Invigorating. And now for some reason I can’t stop talking and is it getting hot in here or is that just the fever coming back?-“

Dan has a million things to say but no words to say them with.

So he does the only thing he can think of.

He reaches a hand for Herbert’s neck and kisses him.

Then his nervous system fucking explodes.

Every atom in his body vibrates and hums.

He feels his heart swelling in his chest.

He is kissing Herbert West.

Their lips smoothly collide, and Dan can feel Herbert tense and a noise of surprise is heard from the back of his throat, but he slowly melts into the touch.

Herbert exhales through his nose, and Dan can feel the gentle air flowing on his upper lip.

West’s hands search for Dan’s face, as Dan’s hand crawls up into his dark hair, tenderly running his fingers through.

Herbert’s lips are surprisingly soft, and the feeling of their faces pressing together is addictive.

It’s a memory that he will carry with him forever.

When they finally separate, panting quietly, Dan lets it spill:

“I love you.”

Herbert looked at him, eyes wide.

He looked like he had so much to say, like a cacophony of words and phrases and feelings were rising up his throat, and it was about to expel itself out from his esophagus like bile.

“Dan I…”

Then he realized it was actual bile.

Herbert jumped to his feet and stumbled towards the open bathroom door, and promptly proceeded to vomit into the toilet.

Dan hastily followed behind him, and sat next to him.

“I…uh…I guess my kissing was that bad, huh?”

“Apologies, I thought I was cleared out.”

“Me too…did you uh, did you hear what I said?”

“Yes… that you, love me.”

His tongue tripped over the word. He was still facing the toilet, not making eye contact with Dan.

“Yeah…I- I’m sorry I kissed you, I should have asked first.”

“One moment.”

Herbert stood up and went to the sink and started to thoroughly rinse his mouth out. Dan eyes his lips as the water dripped out of them.

“Look, Herb… I understand if you don’t feel the same wa-“

In a split second, Herbert’s lips were on his again, this time with more desperation.

Their faces collided with a veracity that Dan had never encountered.

Herbert’s fingers scrunched the front of Dan’s shirt, pulling it upward and towards him.

This time, Herbert opened his mouth into the kiss. Their individual mouths became a mess of flesh and teeth and salvia.

Dan explored Herbert’s mouth, feeling his cheeks, his tongue, his teeth. He tasted slightly sour from the stomach acid, and perhaps in a different moment with a different person Dan might’ve given a damn.

Herbert is kneeling between sprawled legs on the dingy bathroom tile, and is pulled closer by needy hands so he is positioned right on Dan’s lap.

Those hands start to creep up Herbert’s shirt and when skin meets skin it feels like a beam of sunshine just injected into his bloodstream.

They rubbed along his lower chest, and made their way to his upper back.

He moves his mouth away from Herbert’s and starts to kiss his neck. The kisses on his neck are more tender, with soft lips being followed by a softer tongue.

“Dan I-“

Herbert was periodically letting out soft moans and exhales.

He looked euphoric. His glasses were diss arranged and his hair was messy. His cheeks were pink as a flower and he was panting. His lips and the skin surrounding were covered in a wet mix of his and Dan’s salvia.

“I- I love you too.”

And a single tear dripped down his cheek.

That’s when Dan came up for air.

He slid his hands out from under Herbert’s shirt and placed them on his cheeks, wiping away the tear, but when he did, more just followed.

Fat droplets spilled from his eyes, as he started into Dan’s.

Dan pulled their forehead together, and those were all the words needed.

“Here,” he started to maneuver himself out from under Herbert. “You should get some rest,”

He grabbed his hand and gently pulled him into the bedroom, easing him down on the soft pillows.

Herbert’s glasses are pulled from his face and placed on the nightstand, but when Dan tries to leave, he feels a grip on his fingers.

“Would you uhm…”

He struggles to get the words out, covering his mouth and peering his red face downwards.

“Would you care to perhaps, stay?”

A flutter emerges in Dan’s rib cage, as he nods and crawls under the covers with Herbert.

The bed creaks and and the sheets ruffle as they attempt to get comfortable.

Herb is facing away from Dan, and he slides his arms around him, pulling his warmth closer.

Their feet touch and their legs intertwine, and Daniel inhales the pleasant air that floats around Herbert.

God, he loved him.

Every hair on his head every wrinkle on his skin every pore every limb every finger and toenail his eyes his neck his glasses his lips and that little mole on his face.

He loved it all.

And he would not let it go.