Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It is a typical drizzly Seattle Friday. The grey clouds loom low, disguising Elliot Bay and Rainier alike in a salty cool mist. Professionals hide in their rain jackets, hoods drawn for their commute, headphones hidden but coffee ever present. The city feels small on days like today. A private snow globe of misty mountain air.

When Simon first moved here, the rain felt oppressive, but over the last two years it’s become a quiet comfort. An ever-present backdrop to the mundane moments of everyday life. No matter what was happening, you can count on the quiet grey drizzle. It is a welcome constant in his life, much like his morning stop at Cafe Ladro on the way to school. His extra hot americano feels like the closest thing to Venezuelan coffee in the US. It helps that the beautiful barista Damon fancies Simon enough to slip him the occasional free biscotti. Simon swiftly grabbed his usual, throwing a quick wink across the counter, eliciting an eye roll from his roommate. Although Damon and him only met two years ago, their banter feels reminiscent of his childhood friends Rosh and Ayub. Damon is an aspiring actor who joined their gaming sessions with ease. Rosh immediately took to him after learning that he plays in a gay men’s recreational soccer league. It didn’t take long for their trio to envelop him in, only excluding him when they accidentally slipped into Swedish.

Ayub is studying for his post doctorate in environmental sciences at the University of Washington. Ayub claims it is because of the exceptional program but Simon insists that it is because of that silly sweatshirt he got in high school that Ayub discovered the program. Initially Rosh stayed in Sweden, working as an assistant coach for a minor league women’s futbal team. But as Simon and Ayub settled into Seattle, Rosh began applying for jobs with the Seattle Reign. It wasn’t the same level of prestige that the European leagues carry but being with her best friends in one of the gayest cities in the US made it a good next step.

Their chosen family finds a new rhythm in Seattle. Simon loves working as a music teacher for one of Seattle’s public schools. Although he initially loathed the early mornings, he finds the actual work rewarding. He loves working with children, especially in a city that values the arts so highly. It is refreshing for his work to be taken seriously by students and parents alike. Half of the parents he meets spend his office hours reminiscing about the “good old days” when grunge dominated the Seattle scene.

Simon wraps his hands around his coffee as he climbs the hill to Garfield High School. He follows nurses arriving at Seattle First Hill and thinks of his mother, who is likely be reheating leftovers after working the evening shift at her hospital in Sweden. He misses Linda but is always grateful for their weekly family FaceTime’s. Small moments like this made him feel slightly home sick-which feels ironic to admit, given how deeply he hated Sweden when he first moved there. He pushes the well of emotions down as he takes the stairs of his high school two at a time. Simon redirects himself, it’s time to focus. Simon is behind on grading and needs to solidify their set list for their upcoming concert.

Focusing would be much easier if it wasn’t for the tall, handsome man he nearly topples over, opening the front door.

“Herregud! Shit, I’m so sorry”

A very flustered Simon starts picking up the stack of books and folders that the stranger had been delicately balancing, now scattered in the school’s entryway. A variety of what appears to be coffee-stained journals and notebooks with what can only be described as chicken scratch. The man remains frozen, a blush creeping up from under his collared shirt to his ears as he realizes that Simon is picking up his mess while he stands still in shock.

“What did you just say?”

Simon hides an eye roll, assuming the flippant curse word he uttered had offended this obviously proper man.

“I’m sure you’ll hear way worse in the hallways between classes” Simon quips.

Standing up, Simon allows himself to properly check out this golden retriever man seemingly frozen in time. His golden-brown hair frames his deep walnut eyes with a smattering of fading freckles from a summer spent burning in the sun, no doubt, given his otherwise pale complexion.

Standing up, Simon realizes he is significantly taller, probably at least 15cm, holding his stare with curiosity. His eyebrows quirk up, awaiting an answer that Simon feels completely undignified providing.

Returning to the present moment, the stranger repeats Simon’s earlier sentiment,

“Herregud”

Eyes widening and a curious smile spreading across his face,

“Mitt namn ar Wilhelm,” switching into English with ease,

“…but you can call me Wille.”

Simon remembers some form of self-control, closing his mouth that is hanging open, slowly processing that this gorgeous man in front of him is Swedish. Or at least speaks Swedish. Or knows enough Swedish to understand Simon’s second nature slang.

Now Simon is the one dumbfounded.

Wille continues, stumbling over his words in an enduringly awkward way that now makes Simon the blushing fool.

“I am so sorry- let me take all of those. Thank you so much.”

In a self-depreciating chuckle, Wille continues,
“I’ve just haven’t heard anyone else speak Swedish since I’ve moved here. I thought I was the only one, which sounds stupid now that I say it out loud because Seattle is like four times the size of Stockholm so there is bound to be someone who speaks Swedish…. But still”

Simon finally collects himself enough to share Willes giddy smile and extend a hand,

“Simon. I am the music teacher and choir director here.”

Unable to accept the gesture with his arms now full of books that Simon neatly stacked, Wille nods with a shy twinkle in his eye that feels flirtatious enough to give Simon butterflies.

The bell rings overhead which cues Simon and Wille that they are both officially late to start their days, although Simon still doesn’t know what that means for Wille. Was he a new teacher? Administrator?

What is this awkwardly charming Swedish man doing at Garfield High School?

Flustered but as cool as he can manage, Simon smiles and nods in the direction of the choir room, cueing to Wille that he has to get going. Simon chances a look back at the handsome stranger to catch one last glimpse before turning into his room.

Wille is exactly where Simon left him, seemingly processing their unexpected, albeit delightful interaction.

Simon lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, grateful that he has a free first period to reheat his now cool coffee and plan his day. If he has time, he might also ask Jacob, the art teacher who shared a wall with him, if he knew anything about the handsome man he just ran into.

Before he has the chance, Jacob waltzes through his door, ever giddy and all too cheery for 7:00am on a Friday. Jacob is a couple of years older, quintessential Seattleite with short jet-black hair and deep set eyes, carefully hidden by his tortoise shell glasses. He is a small stylish man outfitted in REI and thrifted sweaters, effortlessly handsome in the way that suits the locals- no frills but obviously takes pride in how he presents. Jacob was born and raised here after his parents emigrated to Seattle from Vietnam. He and Simon bonded immediately over having immigrant parents and their mutual love for pop music and comic books. Jacob is happily married to a charming woman named Katherine who is always trying to set Simon up with any single gay men that come into her Pilates studio.

Jacob rattles on about his plans for the weekend. They are going to take their daughter Ella to the gingerbread house exhibit. She is only 2 years old but a product of her energetic and kind parents, eager to meet new people and explore.

Simon hums in agreement as Jacob prattles on, mind still in the entryway with Wille. Jacob barely notices Simon’s distraction, chalking it up to his full cup of coffee and general distaste for mornings. They continue their comfortable banter while Simon organizes his desk and motiones to the doorway, indicating it is time for him to heat up his coffee. They have eased into this sort of routine upon meeting one another. Jacob, always eager and occasionally aloof, going with the flow as Simon urges them both through his own morning routine. Initially, the constant company felt exhausting; could he ever just get a minute alone? But as the routine developed, Simon grew to appreciate his ever present coworker turned friend.

The microwave brings Simon’s Americano back to life as the old, worn out box did its faithful job. In his periphery, Simon notices the room quiets as a faint knock on the door brings everyone to attention. The principal stands at the door, appreciating the quiet before she interrupts it with an announcement.

“Folks this is Wilhelm Larsson, a new teacher joining our district, filling in for Mrs. Marietta while she is on maternity leave”

Principal Kim gestures towards Wilhelm, who is taking Simon’s breath away for the second time before 8:00am, which must be obvious by the way Jacob nudged his elbow into Simon’s side at his obvious gawking. Wille speaks softly with a slight nervous edge that wasn’t obvious earlier.

“Thank you for having me. It’s nice to meet you. Forewarning, I’m awful with names but I’ll do my best. And please, call me Wille.”

A quiet hum circulated the room as the teachers wave and greet him.

“Well then Wilhelm, let’s keep with the tour. Thank you everyone and have a great long weekend!”

As Principal Kim turns on her heels, Simon’s colleagues return to normal, while Simon is trying to reign in rapid heartbeat. I mean, how embarrassing to become so flustered by a near perfect stranger.

It doesn’t help the situation when he hears an assured and warm,

“Nice to see you again Simon” from Wille’s rosy, chapped lips as he follows their boss’s lead back into the hallway.

Didn’t Wille just say he isn’t good at remembering names?

Jacob repeated “Sea-mon” out loud, eliciting a deep blush as Simon drags them both back to his classroom. This is all the leverage Jacob needs to drill his friend with questions.

“First of all, why did you never correct me about pronouncing your name right? I mean dude, I’ve known you four years, and the hot new sub was singing it like an old love song.”

Rolling his eyes as his completely dramatic and ever romantic friend, Simon responds,
“Well, everyone here always pronounces it wrong anyway and it’s honestly more work trying to correct them than it’s worth. I mean you of all people should get that, Minh.”

Minh is Jacob’s traditional Vietnamese name, but he always goes by his American name Jacob.

“Fine, okay okay, one point Simon. You’ve got me there. We can come back to that later… but dude what was that was all about.”

The accompanied arm motion elicits a giggle from Simon as he feigns ignorance to Jacob’s dramatic gesture,

“What do you mean?”

Simon crosses his arms, trying hard not to crack a smile and embarrass himself even further today.

“I mean the lovey dovey eyes across the room while you’re both practically drooling at one another. How the fuck do you even know each other?”

Attempting to maintain the cool confident demeanor he usually prides himself on, Simon responds,

“We just bumped into one another on my way in today, that’s all.”

That was not all. Simon has been thinking about their interaction ever since it occurred. He has a million and one questions that he knows he will easily forget anytime those soft brown eyes were in front of him.

Jacob scoffs at Simon’s attempt to be casual, repeating Simon’s response back in a mocking tone,

“‘We just bumped into one another’ ohhhh sureeeee, of course Simon, you two just bumped into each other…Well that doesn’t exactly explain the looks you two were exchanging. Have you two hooked up or something?”

Simon appreciates Jacob’s forwardness and candor, even in awkward moments like these. There is something so personal about feeling comfortable enough to call someone out and ask them such blunt questions. But in this circumstance Simon is confused,

“Wait no, what??”

“I’m just saying, if you haven’t hooked up yet, you will soon. The way you two looked at each other was straight out of a cheesy romantic comedy.”

Surprised at the suggestion and reeling from the realization that maybe other people noticed his embarrassing ogling over Wille, Jacob continues,

“I mean no one else would have noticed. I just know you, Simon. I’ve been your wingman enough times to know what you look like when your love struck.”

“So, you don’t think anyone else noticed?” Simon whispered

Delighted at his sleuth like perception, Jacob smiles a wide, toothy grin. Dad voice in full effect,

“No Simon. Just me, I swear. No one else in the lounge was awake enough to even register the entire introduction, I’m sure of it… I wouldn’t worry about anything, except maybe what you’ll wear when you work up the courage to ask him out.”

The smug giddiness radiating off of Jacob is palpable and makes Simon feel like a little kid all over again.

“We will see. I don’t know if he’s even gay. Or if he’d want to go on a date with me?”

Jacob offers “well if it’s any consolation, I have known you for four years and while you are one of the most handsome men I know, I have never looked at you the way Wille just did.
I’m just saying Simon. I don’t know his identity, but I could see the spark between you two.”

Simon lets out a deep sigh as he rolls his eyes,

“As if you’d ever have a chance with me”, adding a wink for good measure

Jacob lets out a guttural laugh, chuckling to himself as he makes his way to the door.

“Well keep me updated lover boy. I’ll see you at lunch?”

“Yes Jacob! See you then. Have a good rest of your morning.”

Something Simon always loves about Jacob is that he knows when to push and when to stop.

Simon hums to himself as he processes this bizarre conversation with Jacob and his equally unusual morning. He shrugs off the questions circulating his mind and forces himself to focus on the day ahead of him. Time will tell. He just has to get through the day and push Wille out of his mind for now.

Chapter Text

It’s only been a week of living here but the grey hue and continuous drizzle make the days blend together. Wille was prepared for rain, warned by many that the Seattle winter was no better than Stockholm’s, but as he explained, at length, this move has never been about the weather.

A semester as an exchange student in high school brought him to the US for the first time and he cherishes the memory. When your family is as well-known and controversial as his, anonymity is rare.

Wille loved being able to escape to Portland. While the city itself wasn’t his cup of tea, the Pacific Northwest quickly became his home away from home. And ultimately, Portland served him well for that semester. He explored a creative side he had never entertained previously, journaling nearly every day.

Boris, his therapist, initially recommended writing as a tool to process his anxiety and panic attacks. Quite reluctant and embarrassed at the thought of putting his feelings into words, Wille avoided it all together at first, but Boris saw through his laundry list of excuses and challenged him to give it a try. Wille has been hooked ever since. Whether it is prose or fiction or his favorite, poetry; Wille started writing like he was running out of time.

It was bittersweet for his parents who had practically forced him into therapy to “sort out his emotions” before he went to college and ultimately took over the family business. They were not too keen to learn that Wille wanted to transform this tool and passion into a career. His parents only permitted this pursuit with the promise of a double major in English and business, holding out hope that he would change his mind.

Wille always knew he would end up back in the Pacific Northwest, much to his parents’ dismay.

Ultimately, Seattle feels like coming home.

Wille treasures the early morning gloominess and greenery everywhere. He has never lived somewhere that is so lush. There is inspiration all around between the lakes, mountains, and cityscape. Alpenglow renders him speechless every sunset, unsure of how anyone could become complacent to such beauty. Wille chuckles at the thought that his parents ever doubted that he was a poet. A sensitive, queer kid who loves nature and reading. Some hard truths are simply easier to digest in hindsight.

Although he wants to stay in bed with his journal and a good book, Wille is excited about this new opportunity. Garfield high school is in the heart of downtown Seattle near Capitol Hill; notoriously artsy and queer.

Wille is eager for the opportunity, even if it is a substitute position to start. He hopes he can charm the administration enough that they might consider hiring him as permanent staff. Only time will tell.

Wille chooses a collared shirt and jumper, sifting through his still full moving boxes for a rain jacket to weather the drizzle.

He gathers what feels like only the essentials as far as reading, writing, and teaching goes but chuckles at the thought of if his best friend, Felice could see him right now. His childhood best friend is likely still sound asleep after a late night at her restaurant in New York. It is a miracle that they both wound up in the US after growing up together halfway across the world. Despite the time difference, he doesn’t dare interrupt her beauty rest with a face time of his ridiculous stack of books for his first day. He settles on a self-timer picture and sends it to her, like a kid on their first day of school.

Dodging rain drops with his messenger bag over his stack of books, Wille makes his way to his new workplace. The bus ride is fairly uneventful, albeit a touch late. Luckily, he gave himself ample time before he was due to meet a Principal Kim who will give him a tour.

The school entrance is unassuming and historic looking for the area. Most of Seattle is so new and shiny, old brick like this feels like a different time period entirely. Wille lingers in the entryway, letting his coat drip dry as he shakes his wet mop, allowing himself a moment to breathe before continuing; relax his shoulders, roll them gently, breathe through his nose, and…

he feels the air leave his lungs in a shutter as he processes his books and notebooks scattering to the ground.

His eyes shoot open, and he loses all sense of rational thought as he takes in the sight of the man who knocked his books to the floor.

Soft, ringlet curls surround a sculpted jaw. Glowing golden skin barely showing a blush as he appears to process the disaster that is unfolding between the two. His eyes are deep brown and distracted but warm in a way that makes Wille’s heart swell.

The handsome stranger returns his look with an apology,

“Herregud! Shit, I’m so sorry”

Wille stops in his tracks, frozen in the moment at the familiarity of the casual Swedish that slipped from this gorgeous man’s mouth. Is his mind playing tricks on him? Did this handsome stranger just slip into Swedish?

Self-restraint out the window and curiosity winning out, Wille responds,

“What did you just say?”

Completely oblivious to how accusatory the question was until he notices a subtle eye roll as the man retorted,

“I’m sure you’ll hear way worse in the hallways between classes”

Cursing his own tone and implication, Wille quickly repeats the stranger’s Swedish sentiment back to him,

“Herregud”

Unable to control the giddy toothy smile spreading across his face, Wille boldly transitions to his native tongue to test the waters,

“Mitt namn ar Wilhelm but you can call me Wille.”

Relief pools as he manages to regain some composure while the handsome man in front of him flounders at this new information. Eager to explain himself, Wille starts,

“I am so sorry- let me take all of those. Thank you so much.”

Unable to hide his own embarrassment Wille continues,

“I’ve just haven’t heard anyone else speak Swedish since I’ve moved here. I thought I was the only one, which sounds stupid now that I say it out loud because Seattle is like four times the size of Stockholm so there is bound to be someone who speaks Swedish…. But still”

Mirroring his smile, the man extends his hand,

“Simon. I am the music teacher and choir director here.”

Wishing he could reciprocate the gesture, Wille nods at the attention and eye contact while balancing his neatly stacked books, thanks to Simon.

The moment lingers, palpable chemistry suspended in time, interrupted by the morning bell.

Simon nods toward what he can only assume is his classroom and ushers away.

Wille stays exactly as Simon left him, doing his best to regain some semblance of composure before finding Principal Kim’s office.

Fortunately, it didn’t take long as the principal waves at Wille from the top of the split-level staircase.

A simple, professional woman with sensible shoes to compliment her knee length skirt and cardigan. Chin length hair cut sharp against her jaw with high apple cheeks, she exudes warmth.

“Wilhelm Larsson?”

“Yes it’s so great to meet you finally!”

“Why don’t you follow me to your new classroom so we can set down your books before we take a look around.”

Wille collects his thoughts and forces his attention back to the moment, focusing on following his new boss.

They walk through a hallway that feels like every other school he’s ever been in. Cork boards with announcements litter the black space between classrooms. Fluorescent lights hum above. The door Principal Kim gestures to envelops him with warmth. It has a level of organization that he would likely disrupt despite his best efforts, with neatly labeled bins and bookshelves. His heart swells at the pride flag hanging next to the whiteboard. The simplicity of the symbol, however small in the expanse of the room, makes him feel seen.

Wille loves living in a queer city. Although Sweden is impressive when it comes to human rights, his own circle of privilege was far less accepting of his identity or lack thereof. Wille is queer. The nuance and fluidity of such an identity was what appealed to him most. He likes who he likes, men, women, cis, and trans. He isn’t fixated on gender as much as he is focused on personality and energy.

Wille’s parents are conservative business folks who have very clear expectations of their youngest, which include marrying a ‘proper’ woman and producing heirs to their family business. It has always been infuriating because Wille likes women, but he does not want to be confined to them, especially the kind that his parents would “approve of”.

The emotion of the memory sits heavy in his throat as Principal Kim brings him back to reality. She points out the stacks of folders containing the lesson plans Mrs. Marietta had started.

“Mrs. Marietta told me that she completed enough lesson plans for 10 weeks but those didn’t start until later in the school year. She expected to have another two months to prepare the remainder before the twins arrived… but obviously they had other plans.”

“Oh, it’s no problem. I actually enjoy prepping curriculum.”

A shy smile at his nerdy admission spreads. Principal Kim responds in kind.

“I really appreciate your willingness to start early and take on this extra work. We are short staffed as it is, and you just can’t predict or prepare for these types of situations. Even with as thoughtful as Mrs. Marietta is, no one could have predicted she would go into labor so early.”

“I am really sorry it’s under these circumstances, but I am glad I can be here to help. How is the family holding up? How are the babies?”

“They have a long road ahead of them. The babies will be in the NICU for several months. They were born at only 28 weeks, so they need a lot of help. They have to be in incubators to maintain their temperature and blood sugars. The girl, Isla is feisty, I guess. She was the bigger twin too. She only needs CPAP. I didn’t even realize they made CPAP masks that small! All I could think of is my grandpa Joe and his CPAP equipment when he lived with us. Anyway, the boy, Luca is smaller and needs a lot more support. He is intubated with a breathing tube and ventilator. My heart goes out to them. I’ve been checking in with her and her partner to see what I can do.”

“I can’t even imagine how hard that must be. Please let me know if I could help at all. I’d love to drop off some food or a home cooked meal to them.”

“That’s very thoughtful Wilhelm. Thank you… Shall I continue the tour so you know your way around and then you can come back and settle in?”

Eager to look around more, Wille follows his boss as she gives very detailed descriptions of his colleagues and their lives while walking past their rooms. He is learning that Principal Kim is a talker, the kind of woman who gives a lot of context for even the most seemingly insignificant anecdotes. It adds whimsy to an otherwise ordinary tour, that is until they made it to the teachers’ lounge. Silence falls when Principal Kim walks in the room. Although friendly and bubbly, she commands attention in a way that is impressive and intimidating.

“Folks this is Wilhelm Larsson, a new teacher joining our district, filling in for Mrs. Marietta while she is on maternity leave”

Suddenly nervous with all of the attention on him, Wille takes a deep breath before managing,

“Thank you for having me. It’s nice to meet you. Forewarning, I’m awful with names but I’ll do my best. And please call me Wille.”

It was then that Wille notices the beautiful music teacher he nearly knocked over this morning. Butterflies threatened to derail him, a faint blush creeping up his neck as he fights to maintain his composure.

Principal Kim comes to his rescue,

“Well then Wilhelm, let’s keep with the tour. Thank you everyone and have a great long weekend!”

Emboldened as he turns to follow suit, Wille addresses the elephant in the room,

“Nice to see you again Simon”

He is grateful for Principal Kim’s fast pace so he didn’t have to wait for a response.

What was he thinking?

Luckily, he didn’t have the luxury to indulge that anxiety. Instead, turning his attention back to Principal Kim as she starts a new tangent about the cafeteria food. Wille hums affirmatively, half listening while he tries to push thoughts of Simon to the side.

He hasn’t felt such a magnetic attraction to someone in so long. His energy is captivating, and it doesn’t help that he is easily the most attractive person he’d ever laid eyes on. Even if Simon isn’t interested in Wille romantically, he knows that he will welcome whatever kind of relationship Simon would give him. He just wants to get to know this angelic, mysterious man who speaks Swedish.

He’ll make an effort to do so. Boris will be proud of him, taking risks and putting himself out there. It has always been so easy for Wille to withdraw but not this time- not anymore. This is a new chapter for him and he is excited to finally be the author of his own future.

Chapter Text

Fortunately, the rest of morning passes in its usual pre-weekend way, with lots of banter and giddiness. Simon brings a simple sack lunch of PB&J sandwiches and halo clementines. The tediousness of peeling the clementines is a soothing little ritual that allows ample opportunity for Jacob to fill Simon in on the latest student gossip. Being “the cool art teacher”, Jacob’s words, come with the privilege of knowing all of the drama that these teenagers can muster.

“It has turned into a whole love triangle Simon. Sienna likes her best friend Hana but Lovertte likes Hana as well. And of course, I have all three of them asking me for advice about the other. And Hana is having an identity crisis because she’s attracted to Sienna but doesn’t want to ruin their friendship. And she’s not sure if she’s lesbian or bisexual or if she just likes men out of cis het obligation and sexism and internalized homophobia. Or if she really likes both. Mind you these kids are asking me for advice when I was the awkward nerd, illustrating my own comic books on my lunch break….”

Recognizing Simon’s inattention, Jacob continues,

“…oh and I also had a pet dinosaur named Ziggy because my mom was obsessed with everything reggae.”

Simon offers a quiet,

“Hmm that’s nice”

To which Jacob snaps his fingers and sings,

“Earth to Simon…. Helllllloooo”

This does the trick and breaks him out of his toddler like fixation on his fruit.

“What’s on your mind?”

Jacob’s genuine concern permeates the moment and dissolves as he waits for a response.

“I was in the middle of a story, and you totally checked out. And before you insist that you were paying attention, you weren’t because I told you I had a pet dinosaur named after Ziggy Marley”

A warm chuckle breaks the remaining tension. Simon sighs before responding with his head in his hands,

“Okay it’s probably sounds super dumb, but I cannot stop thinking about Wille.”

Simon chances moving his fingers apart to peek at Jacob and gauge his reaction before he continues.

A stupid grin spreads across Jacob’s face while he grabs onto Simon’s elbows across the table,

“Fuck yeah Simon. I fucking knew it! You should go for it bro. I’m so serious. He seems cool. You are cool. You owe it to yourself to indulge, have some fun!

Simon’s eye roll is warmly ignored by Jacob who is keen on encouraging this.

“I don’t know. Maybe you’re right? Rosh and Ayub are always telling me to get out more. And I haven’t been this preoccupied with someone in a long time. I know I just met him but… maybe I’ll go for it?”

Soft, warm eyes meet Simon’s, affirming his well-hidden insecurities and encouraging him to pursue this possibility.

Jacob raises a hand in a short wave to someone out of sight, coming from the cafeteria.

“Well lover boy, my work here is done. You have approximately 30 seconds to create a plan before your new boo makes his way over.”

Simon’s ears go hot and a blush spreads down to his chest. He whispers an empty threat,

“Oh you are in so much trouble Jacob!”

Jacob smugly smiles and greets Wille, initiating a more proper introduction after the quick one this morning in the teachers’ lounge. Without skipping a beat, Jacob while offers Wille his seat.

“No Wille, please, I insist. I was just telling Simon how much grading I have to do.”

Simon playfully teases,

“Don’t you just give everyone an A because… it’s art?”

His eyes crinkling as he tries to control his laughter at his own joke.

“Alright that’s my cue. You are sounding a little too much like Mę for my liking Simon. Wonderful to meet you Wille. See you all later.”

Self-assured and content at his role in this, Jacob saunters off, no doubt texting his wife about his matchmaking skills.

Wille is clearly amused at the whole interaction, smiling at the banter before setting his own lunch tray down.

Willes lunch was not much better than Simon’s, a large slice of pepperoni pizza and Gatorade.

Apparently, Simon’s eyes linger too long on his meal choice because Wille offers,

“Yeah, I didn’t have enough sodium with the pizza, so I made sure to add extra with my drink.”

The sarcasm is surprising, breaking the ice with a guttural laugh that Simon fails to contain.

Once their giggling has subsided, Simon offers,

“Mine isn’t much better. PB&Js with clementines. Still a kid lunch.”

“At least you have a fruit”

With quick confidence Simon offers his other Clementine to Wille, raising his eyebrows,

“I won’t peel it for you but I’m happy to share”

Their fingers touch, exchanging the soft citrus between their hands. Simon gets goosebumps on his arms at the contact. Wille obviously notices, eyes tracing from his eyes to his fingertips, but gracefully ignores.

“Tack”

A comfortable silence ensues as Wille wrestles the clementine with his short, picked at nails.

Too many questions linger on the tip of his tongue, he settles on asking about Sweden.

“So how does a Swede end up at Garfield High subbing for parental leave?”

Willes lip quirks up, accompanied by his sincere eyes,

“I guess I could ask you the same question, minus the subbing part.”

Is Wille being charming right now? Is he flirting? The way he responds so quickly is so smooth. Has Wille been thinking about Simon too?

Anchoring himself in the moment, Simon forces his attention back on Wille, maintaining eye contact while awaiting his real answer with an earnest curiosity.

“I grew up in Stockholm. I grew up kinda being the ‘trouble child’ so during high school my parents sent me away to a foreign exchange program, here in the states. I lived in Portland and knew I wanted to come back to the Northwest but wasn’t sure how I would make it happen. Long story short, the prospect of college came and when I told my parents I wanted to be an author and a teacher, they were not too happy. They had always assumed I would take over the family business growing up,”

There was a pregnant pause as Wille thoughtfully forms his next words,

“…especially after my older brother passed.”

Any grief on Willes face was quickly replaced with resolve and years of practice, if Simon had to guess.

Without thinking twice, Simon extends his hand across the table, squeezing Willes arm. His skin was warm and soft with a smattering of freckles peeking out from his rolled-up sleeves.

“Wille, I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine.”

Simon’s eyes well up at the prospect of losing his sister, controlling any tears, aware that this is not his moment to mourn. Wille covers Simon’s hand and reciprocates a tender squeeze of reassurance. Their eyes meet before Wille continues with determination,

“Anyways, I had a lot to prove so when I sat down and thought about how I would make it happen- I knew I had to come back to the Pacific Northwest. It’s where I fell in love with writing and poetry, so it only felt right to honor that love by returning to it.”

Simon’s heart melts at how obviously romantic Wille is. He can see he is meant to be a writer, a poet. It seeps out of him.

Realizing that he has yet to form a coherent response to such a beautiful sentiment, Simon offers,

“That is really beautiful Wille.”

Processing the revelation; the bravery and vulnerability of the moment, Simon can’t help himself;

“Like fuck. That is so dope. And brave. And cool.”

Seemingly pleased by his candid and unfiltered reaction, a blush spreads all the way to Wille’s ears. Simon continues,

“I am so glad you’re—

The school bell rings, popping their little bubble of bliss and returning them to reality. With a causal chuckle, Simon finishes his thought,

“—here.”

A coy and enduring smile reveals Willes crooked teeth and Simon revels at being the source for such a beautiful sight.

Realizing his hand is still on Willes arm, Simon rolls his eyes and points at the sky, reluctantly removing it, to signal that it’s time to go.

Words evade them but Simon doesn’t think they need any. Their eyes exchange a glimmer of something. A spark perhaps; it dances between them effortlessly, pulsating between them.

“Wait— uhhh before you go…”

Wille scrambles, pressing his hands to his pockets to reveal a tiny green notebook. He jots down a phone number followed by ‘W’.

“We didn’t have enough time to talk about what brought you here.”

All awkwardness evaporates at the smooth way Wille offers Simon his number.

“I’d really like to get to know you, Simon. Text me if you’d be interested in that— no pressure though.”

Warm heat pools in his abdomen as Simon reaches out to accept the slip of paper, hand lingering longer than necessary, reluctant to let this moment go, but eager for the promise of more to come.

Chapter Text

The morning passes with folder after folder of new hire paperwork and curriculum materials. Wille is overwhelmed but excited by it. It is nice to feel needed and in an area he feels somewhat confident in.

English in high school was far less about grammar than it was about reading and writing. Although a Swede teaching English did offer a certain irony that he can’t help but chuckle at. Wille reviews the carefully made curriculum plans for the coming weeks, paying particular attention to the neatly printed handwritten notes in the periphery of the paperwork.

Fortunately for Wille, the students are beginning their poetry portion of the class which is his favorite topic. There is something so calming about making sense of chaos around him with words. Speaking always feels far more difficult than writing. Wille wants to be thoughtful with his words, but it is so much harder to do that in the heat of the moment when emotions are involved. Will has a temper, and he knows it. His emotions always feel bigger than everyone else’s, harder to control. Poetry is an outlet where he can thoughtfully process his emotions in a constructive way. It is a way to make beauty out of chaos.

Mrs. Marietta obviously anticipated that her students would be reluctant to poetry because her lesson plan starts with modern day poetry and its role in hip/hop and rap music.

This is going to be so much fun! It is hard to find school approved rap music and he doesn’t want to step on any toes during his first week, but he is excited for the challenge. He will spend the weekend doing a little more research. His backup plan will be to play clean versions of songs he already knows will fit the bill.

Ideally, he wants to play Tyler, the Creators new album Chromokopia cover to cover because it is so fucking good and it just dropped. It would be an amazing opportunity to really engage the students in the topic while proving that poetry is still relevant. He hasn’t done as thorough research as he’d like to before presenting it, but Wille had all weekend. His backup plan will be to play Kendrick Lamar’s 2022 album Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers. Wille’s senior capstone was actually a full analysis of the album and the interplay of sexual orientation and gender identity across cultures and generations.

Wille has always known he is different, which is to say that he always had an inkling that he is queer. His conservative upbringing and internalized homophobia prevented him from coming to terms with it fully until he went to university. Even after he came out, his identity has become a topic in an ongoing family feud. Sweden’s high society circle, to which his parents belong, don’t understand why he can’t ‘only pursue women since he is attracted to them anyway’. It’s such an annoyingly ignorant suggestion that makes his toes curl with anger. Wille doesn’t want a label. He is comfortable existing outside of the binary, on his own spectrum of attraction— if only others would just let him be.

Wille has the whole weekend to consider what option would be best for his pupils on Tuesday.

The administrative and human resource logistics of the morning are far less interesting but ultimately productive. Everyone he has met so far has been as warm as the west coast gets, big city distant but generally kind.

Principal Kim warns Wille about fish Friday at the school, which leads Wille to consider the only other hot lunch alternative, pizza. The beverage options are limited since there is no soda allowed in Washington public schools. He can’t bring himself to drink milk in public as an adult so he opts for a blue Gatorade.

He pays his balance and scans the cafeteria. It is high school all over again but this time he doesn’t know anyone, well, almost anyone.

Wille spots those dark brown curls from across the room. Simon’s back is facing him, but he catches the attention of the colleague sitting across from him. A flicker of recognition and smile spread across his face as he waves Wille over.

Wille makes his was across the lunchroom while the kind stranger rises from his seat and packs his belongings.

“I know we kind of met this morning in the teachers’ lounge but my name is Jacob, I’m the art teacher here… I was actually just heading out so you can take my seat with Simon.”

Ever polite, Wille responds,

“I don’t want to interrupt or intrude.”

Before he can finish his objection, Jacob responds,

“No Wille, please, I insist. I was just telling Simon how much grading I have to do.”

Wille has been careful to focus his attention on Jacob and ignore every impulse to stare at Simon; that is until his warm buttery voice interjects,

“Don’t you just give everyone an A because… it’s art?”

A wicked smile spread wide across his beautiful face and Wille can’t help but reflect it, actively trying to contain his laughter at their banter.

Jacob’s chuckles,

“Alright that’s my cue. You are sounding a little too much like Mę for my liking, Simon. Wonderful to meet you Wille. See you guys later.”

Still chuckling under his breath, Wille sets down his lunch tray. Simon follows the movement, eyes lingering long enough to be caught staring. A delicious peach blush spread across Simon’s cheeks and Wille feels butterflies at the sight. Eager to be the reason for such a beautiful sight, Wille jokes;

“Yeah, I didn’t have enough sodium with the pizza so I made sure to add extra with my drink.”

His self-deprecating joke lands and Wille is rewarded with a bright, guttural laugh from Simon that echoes in a way that would make a stranger on the subway smile. Joining in, Wille vows to find more ways to do that.

As the air settles between them, Simon offers an olive branch,

“Mine isn’t much better. PB&Js with clementines. Still a kid lunch.”

Hardly able to contain an eye roll, Wille challenges,

“At least you have some fruit.”

Swiftly Simon reaches across the table to offer Wille his other clementine,

“I won’t peel it for you but I’m happy to share”

Teasing and tantalizing. Their fingers touch at the exchange. Wille swears he sees goosebumps emerge on Simon’s forearms. He follows their trail up his neck to his eyes where he quickly quiets his own thoughts of how he would do just about anything to see that again.

Suddenly shy at his own train of thought for this near perfect stranger, Wille responds,

“Tack”

A comfortable silence ensues as Wille aims to peel the fruit with his very short fingernails. He has a terrible habit of picking at them when he is anxious.

Simon breaks the silence by asking,

“So how does a Swede end up at Garfield High subbing for parental leave?”

Willes half smirks as he responds,

“I guess I could ask you the same question, minus the subbing part.”

Satisfied by his quick wit and the smile it elicits, Wille continues;

“I grew up in Stockholm. I grew up kinda being the ‘trouble child’ so during high school my parents sent me away for a foreign exchange program, here in the states. I lived in Portland and knew I wanted to come back to the Northwest but wasn’t sure how I would make it happen. Long story short, the prospect of college came and when I told my parents I wanted to be an author and a teacher they were not too happy. They had always assumed I would take over the family business growing up,”

Recounting this time in his life is so complex. The synopsis is so quick but the effect that this time period has had on him has been monumental. How does one synthesize such traumatic life events into a single sentence?

“…especially after my older brother passed.”

Wille has learned to make the devastation of it all palatable, grief weighs heavy in his heart, but he doesn’t always allow himself to be vulnerable with it.

Wille feels Simons soft hand squeeze his arm and he nearly bursts into tears. Wille yearns to be touched, aches for the closeness that comes with that kind of vulnerability. Vulnerability that feels so beautifully intimate.

Simon’s voice emerges gently,

“Wille, I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine.”

Eager to affirm the gesture, Wille places his hand on Simon’s, giving a gentle squeeze. The men exchange a warm glance before Wille continues,

“Anyways, I had a lot to prove, so when I sat down and thought about how I would make it happen- I knew I had to come back to the Pacific Northwest. It’s where I fell in love with writing and poetry, so it only felt right to honor that love by returning to it.”

Slightly embarrassed at how openly he is sharing such intimate details of his life with a near strange, Wille allows himself a second to gauge Simon’s reaction.

With an adorning look that feels unfairly attractive, Simon responds;

“That is really beautiful Wille…”

Another moment passes before Simon continues,

“Like fuck. That is so dope. And brave. And cool.”

Delighted that his vulnerability is earning him such high praises, a deep blush spreads from his chest to his ears. He feels the warmth radiate to his core.

God Simon just had this magnetism that feels so…right.

Simon continues, “I am so glad you’re—

The school bell rings, interrupting their private moment and eliciting a causal chuckle from Simon. God, he wants to record that sweet sound and listen to it on repeat.

Once the bell stops, Simon finishes his thought,

“—here.”

Wille cannot help his smile.

As the moment lingers, Simon rolls his eyes and points at the sky, reluctantly removing his hand from Willes arm, leaving his skin aching for Simon touch as soon as it’s gone.

The hush of students walking to class serve as background noise to their shared silence. The two exchange a glance that feels like something more. Every moment so far with Simon has felt right in a way Wille didn’t know existed.

Determined to continue whatever it is they have started, Wille interjects;

“Wait— uhhh before you go…”

A new surge of confidence swells as Wille searches for a pen and piece of paper, to give Simon his phone number. Hands shaking slightly as his heart beats out of his chest, Wille pulls out his pocket-sized notebook and writes down his phone followed number a ‘W’.

“We didn’t have enough time to talk about what brought you here… I’d really like to get to know you, Simon. Text me if you’d be interested in that- no pressure though.”

Simon graciously accepts the piece of paper, hand lingering in a way that makes Wille giddy.

And now, the hardest part for Wille, he waits…

Chapter Text

Oh, how the tables have turned. This morning, it had been Wille who stood frozen in the hallway as Simon walked away after their initial collision. The warmth and admiration Simon felt as Wille’s eyes followed him to the classroom was beyond flattering. Unironically, Simon is now reciprocating that same longing gaze as Wille walks out of the cafeteria.

It isn’t until the second bell rings, indicating that the next period started, that Simon willed himself out of his trance and kicked it into high gear; grabbing his belongings with one hand while shoving Wille’s note into his front pocket with the other. Simon makes it to his classroom a minute or two late, but the students are too busy gossiping to notice.

With a giddiness begging to be released, he sings the first few notes of a warmup song that his class always starts with. A hush falls over the room as Simon sings confidently, motioning for everyone to assume their positions. The warmups continue with everyone going through the motions.

The hour passes quickly after reviewing the set list for their upcoming holiday concert in December. The songs are straight forward but offer opportunities for several students to perform solos. While Simon’s tolerance for the drama that usually comes with solo performances is minimal, he knows it is really important to include them, nonetheless. He can’t let his own disdain for drama ruin a great opportunity for them.

Simon’s Friday afternoon passes quickly, although the lingering giddiness from his interactions with Wille prove to be distracting.

After the final bell of the day rings, Simon wanders to the teachers’ lounge to brew a hot cup of peppermint tea to hold during his crisp walk home. Simon runs the Keurig machine once to get any remaining coffee grounds out before placing his own mug underneath the machine for some fresh hot water. The sweet smell of peppermint fills his nostrils as the water washes over his tea bag. Savoring the moment and treasuring the heat of his mug, Simon shrugs the shivers away, hoping his drink will heat him from the inside out.

Jacob knows Simon’s routine and taps on the door as Simon picks up his mug.

“Getting ready for the walk home?”

Wiggling his eyebrows suggestively, barely able to contain his laughter, Jacob continues,

“…You know Simon, I could give you a ride and then you could tell me all about your lunch date.”

Simon responds,

“First of all, it isn’t a date if you are eating a paper bag lunch surrounded by your students. Secondly, my apartment is in the completely opposite direction from your house.”

Simon relents,

“Once there is something worth dishing, you’ll be the first to know Jacob.”

Sharing a warm smile and enjoying the levity, Jacob shoots Simon puppy dog eyes with a question,

“Promise?”

Simon loves Jacob’s sense of humor and always deeply appreciates his silliness. He is so grateful to have him in his life. In an effort to maintain the levity Simon reaches out his pinky;

“Pinky promise… I’ll text you but otherwise I’ll see you on Tuesday. Give the family my love and enjoy the extra day off!”

“Likewise, Simon. You better text me if anything happens with ‘you know who’!”

Overcome with appreciation for his friend; their banter, inside jokes, and genuine friendship, Simon responds,

“I will, I will. And Jacob?”

“Hmm?”

“You know I love you bro.”

A wide captivating smile spreads at the seemingly random affirmation.

“You too Simon. I love you too.”

Jacob turns on his heels, hauling his bags and jacket towards the parking lot where he parks his beat up 2010 Prius.

Simon meanders back to his classroom, smiling, reflecting on the day. His interaction(s) with Wille. His conversations with Jacob. He allows his gratitude linger, appreciating these little moments.

Packing up his desk and donning his rain jacket, Simon makes his way out of the school for his commute home, mug in hand.

AirPods in and music playing at full volume, he doesn’t hear the quiet steps approach him before tapping on his shoulder. Startled, Simon whips his head around nearly spilling his tea all over… Wille.

“I am so sorry; I didn’t mean to scare you! I tried calling out your name a couple of times, but people started staring so I figured I’d catch up and just tap you on your shoulder.”

Anxiety oozes out of him as he explains away his reasoning, but Simon didn’t dare indulge it,

“It’s totally fine Wille. I just couldn’t hear you. Are you?”

Simon motions forward at the sidewalk, pointing at the street ahead of him as he takes his ear buds out.

“Errh yeah. I just have a few blocks before I catch the bus. Do you mind if I join you?”

Giddy for the third [third] time today at the prospect of spending time with Wille, Simon nods with maybe a little too much enthusiasm to maintain a casual facade but luckily Willes reciprocating smile dissolve any self-consciousness at his own eagerness.

“Please. I’d love the company.”

They continue through the midafternoon mist in a warm silence until Wille asks,

“Do you always have something hot in your hands?”

Referencing his Americano this morning and gesturing to his well-loved mug between his hands.

Simon lets out a chuckle at the unexpected question,

“You know I never really thought of it like that, but I guess so.”

Simon pauses before continuing,

“I do run cold despite growing up in Sweden. I feel like because I’m Venezuelan my body rejects the cold or something, so I always end up with a hot beverage to warm me up.”

Simon chances a glance to the side to look into those deep brown eyes with impossibly long blonde eye lashes. Wille’s eyes are searching in return and they share a glance that gives Simon butterflies.

With practiced confidence, Wille unwinds his orange scarf and gestures for Simon to pause for a moment. Wille raises his eyebrows in question as he lifts his scarf over Simon’s head and places it delicately around his neck. Simon allows himself to lean into the warmth. Wille’s cologne and shampoo linger on the soft fabric. His shampoo is herbal, mint and tea tree maybe? His cologne, a warm sandalwood scent that reminds him of a summer evening on a beach. Face to face with Wille’s large hands touching the side of his cold neck, good bumps and a deep blush bloom.

His eyes meet Wille’s and he resists the urge to kiss this near perfect stranger. The proximity with the overwhelming scent of him feels nearly too much to bear. Combined with all of the lingering touches of the day, Simon feels like he could combust at the electricity.

Feigning nonchalance; Simon asks,

“Are you sure? Won’t you be cold now?”

“No… I feel plenty warm.”

Wille’s blush could hardly be contained and Simon thinks they might be talking about more than the weather.

“Tack Wille.”

Simon asks Wille to hold his mug while he wraps the orange extension of this handsome man around him once more.

“Absolut Simon.”

They walk casually, exchanging glances and smiles until they reach Wille’s bus stop.

Reluctant to part ways and feeling bolder than usual Simon grazes his free hand against Wille’s and says,

“I’ll call you; you know.”

Without skipping a beat, Wille’s pinky finds his with a gentle but intentional touch and he responds,

“I’m looking forward to it Simon.”

Chapter Text

Pleased by his boldness, Wille walks away with a grin on his face and a giddiness he cannot contain.

Wille walks with quiet confidence that was reinforced by strict manners and lot of prodding from his mother. Although 13cm shorter than him, she would tap on his shoulder or arm and hiss at him to ‘stand up straight’ or ‘keep your shoulders back’.

Determined to make a good impression, he hastily walks through the hallways to arrive back at his classroom before the late bell rings. Although today is a preparatory day for Wille and he doesn’t have to teach until next week, he wants to demonstrate that he is a good employee.

The afternoon passes in a pleasant blur of research as he reviews his album options for his upcoming lesson plan on Tuesday. Naturally he listens to both albums he is considering, cover to cover, frequently pausing and rewinding tracks to clarify the lyrics or better understand its intension.

Wille isn’t a musician but enjoys listening to nearly all genres. He almost always has earbuds in with something playing, whether it is on a walk or riding the bus. In quiet moments, Wille’s mind tends to wander and spiral. While writing has become an amazing tool to process his feelings, listening to music helps prevent those anxious thoughts from spiraling to begin with.

As he continues to dissect the lyrical genius of a Pulitzer Prize winning poet and his younger brother out of LA, Wille can’t help but wonder about Simon’s taste in music. As a musician, does he prefer the classics, or does he gravitate towards newer releases? Does he play any instruments? Oh my god, does he sing? Wille cann’t indulge that thought any further, considering how sickeningly sweet and sultry Simon’s speaking voice is.

After the last bell of the day, Principal Kim finds Wille at his desk, jotting down some final notes before packing up for the long weekend.

“How was your first day here Wilhelm. Did any questions develop that I can help answer?”

“I don’t believe so-Mrs. Marietta’s notes are impressive and quite thorough. I’m going over a couple of details for my first lesson next week, but everything has been great.”

A small but genuine smile emerges with a look of relief that washes over her face. Wille can’t imagine the pressure she must feel in managing so many teachers and students with so little funding. Being a public-school principal in the US isn’t for the faint of heart.

“I’m so glad to hear you’re settling in okay. Please don’t hesitate to let me know if you need anything, anything at all.”

Wille returns the smile and reassures,

“Will do. Take care and enjoy the long weekend.”

“You too!”

Principal Kim’s shoes click clack down the hall while Wille finishes packing his messenger bag. He grabs his burnt orange scarf and wraps it tightly around his neck before zipping up his rain jacket and braving the misty mountain air.

Wille makes his way down the same stairs where he nearly knocked Simon over this morning. He smiles at the memory and lets it warm him while he walks to his bus stop.

Seattle is a different kind of cold in the winter. Although the temperature is not ‘freezing’, Seattle winters have a bone chilling effect that leaves Wille eager for a hot bath and cup of tea after his commute.

Walking with a purpose, Wille recognizes Simon leaving work ahead of him. Eager to catch up Wille shouts his name a few times, increasingly loud until it is borderline embarrassing. Wille scurries ahead and taps on Simon’s shoulder, startling him, realizing that of course he has headphones in.

Reeling in embarrassment and trying to back track his own awkwardness, Wille apologizes profusely,

“I am so sorry; I didn’t mean to scare you! I tried calling out your name a couple of times, but people started staring so I figured I’d just tap on your shoulder.”

Simon’s look is soft and understanding, encouraging even. Wille feels at ease, even though he just completely embarrassed himself again.

“It’s totally fine, Wille. I just couldn’t hear you. Are you?”

Simon motions forward at the sidewalk, pointing at the street ahead of them as he takes his ear buds out. Wille follows his delicate hands place his AirPods back in his case and reveles at his carefree smile.

Trying to refocus his attention to something other than the simple rings on his fingers or the rosiness of his wind kissed cheeks Wille manages,

“Errh yeah. I just have a few blocks before I catch the bus. Do you mind if I join you?”

Simon quickly nods with an eagerness that matches how Wille feels inside.

“Please. I’d love the company.”

The two continue in a comfortable silence until Wille decides which question he wants to ask Simon first. Since this morning, Wille has developed a laundry list of questions but given the short walk, he settles on a lighthearted one,

“Do you always have something hot in your hands?”

Realizing how silly he probably sounds, Wille points to the mug Simon is cradling, hoping to distract from any ridiculous innuendos.

Simon’s laugh washes away all of Wille’s self-consciousness. Simon’s eyes glimmer,

“You know I never really thought of it like that, but I guess so.”

Simon continues,

“I do run cold despite growing up in Sweden. I feel like because I’m Venezuelan my body rejects the cold or something, so I always end up with a hot beverage to warm me up.”

Wille catches Simon’s eyes, exchanging a gaze that feels increasingly warm despite the weather.

In a moment of supreme confidence, Wille unwraps his scarf from around his neck and carefully drapes it around Simon’s. Although Wille is cold, he will gladly endure the chill if it means warming Simon up. He can think of other ways to warm them both up, but he’d have to save those thoughts for another time. His hands brush the side of Simon’s neck during the exchange, which elicits an eruption of goosebumps and a beautiful flush to match.

For a moment, Wille thinks Simon is going to kiss him. The soft, stifled breath and Simons puckered lips look so God damn delicious. It isn’t until Simon responds that Wille is drawn out of his wandering thoughts.

“Are you sure? Won’t you be cold now?”

Wille can’t help the way he blushes when he responds,

“No… I feel plenty warm.”

Seemingly understanding his unspoken feelings, Simon smiles;

“Tack Wille.”

Wille holds Simon’s mug while he wraps his scarf around him one more loop.

“Absolut Simon.”

The men walk casually, leisurely; exchanging glances and smiles until they reach Wille’s bus stop.

Wishing he had a reason to walk longer, Wille allows the silence to settle between the two of them until he feels Simon’s free hand bush against his, along with a quiet promise;

“I’ll call you; you know.”

It is electricity whenever they touch. Wille celebrates the brief connection and grazes his pinky finger against Simon’s hand, eager to reciprocate and replicate each brief moment they’ve touched today.

Head dizzy with intrigue and wonder and curiosity and love and lust Wille manages;

“I’m looking forward to it Simon.”

Chapter Text

Simon gives Wille a small wave before returning his earbuds to his ears and pulling his hood tightly over his curls. Simon is trying to avoid returning home sopping wet as he picks up his own pace.

Simon opens Spotify and scrolls aimlessly for a moment; unsure exactly what he wants to listen to. His daylist is 2010’s angsty situationship Friday afternoon. The titles always feel so on the nose and never fail to make him laugh.

He settles on “my ex’s best friend” by mgk and blackbear to start him off strong. This song always gets him bouncing- the perfect combination of pop with punk rock elements and blackbear’s notorious angst.

“I swear to god, I never fall in love,
then you showed up, and I can’t get enough of it
I swear to god, I never fall in love,
I never fall in love, but I can’t get enough of it”

The lyrics replay in his head as he finally acknowledges his own giddiness about Wille.

Wille, Wille, Wille.

His name sits heavy on his tongue, hovering in the back of his throat, butterflies he can’t bear to swallow. The giddiness is the most surprising emotion to Simon. He is a grown man after all, not a horny teenager having his first sexual awakening.

Simon has known he is gay from a very young age. He has always felt attracted to men and was fortunate enough to live in an environment that made him feel safe to express it. Linda is a fierce advocate for marginalized communities. Her passion as a nurse comes from an aching desire to care for those who need it most. Linda tells stories of her time at the bedside caring for people with HIV and AIDS when many of her colleagues were too afraid to do so. Activism is integral to who she is. It’s a core trait that she demonstrates with action above all else and encourages her children to do the same. As far as identity goes, Linda makes it a point not to assume cis-het identities or limit her children’s expression. When Simon’s older sister Sara asked to get her ears pierced, Linda didn’t hesitate to ask if Simon wanted his done as well. That is just his mom.

The thing parents get wrong about raising queer kids is making a big deal out of it. So many parents are so narrow in their perspective that they limit their children’s universe to a ‘one size fits all’ reality, which queer kids inevitably break, leading to a complete worldview shift of everyone involved. Linda is proof that if parents create a safe environment without prescribing to preconceived notions or norms, queer kids can thrive in a way that doesn’t further marginalize them. He has so much respect for his mother.

Simon has dated over the last several years but hasn’t found anyone that he was ready to settle down with- not that he is in any rush. Seattle is a queer city, and his friend circle is no exception. He has met plenty of handsome eligible men but there has always been something missing. Simon longs for a relationship where he can be raw and authentic. He wants someone to appreciate him whether he is dressed to the nines wearing heels and makeup or lounging in sweats with his curls flat and frizzy. Gay culture can be uncompromising in its expectations about appearance. There is such an emphasis on fitness and style that it can feel difficult to be vulnerable, for fear that someone might not like the real you.

Simon receives plenty of compliments on his appearance but that doesn’t eliminate his own insecurities. He has always been a smaller man, lacking height and muscle that many folks prefer. Being Venezuelan in Sweden inadvertently made him self-conscious; with dark features and curly hair that was a stark contrast from the Scandinavian blue-eyed blondes around him. Racism rears its ugly face in so many ways, with whiteness dictating beauty standards to many; Sweden is no exception. Simon has a litany of insecurities, but he continues to work to love himself despite them. He isn’t interested in anyone who can’t see his inherent value. He has done enough soul searching to be able to distinguish empty flattery with something more.

Wille offers a kind of attention that feels so much deeper than initial physical attraction. While there is a spark that elicits a delicious feeling behind his navel, Simon is drawn in by the Swede for more.

Brazen with bone cold fingers Simon takes out his phone to message Wille. He saves his contact information as:

Wille🧡

The orange heart matches Wille’s orange scarf.

Simon begins to draft a text but can’t decide what to say. It always feels simple until the screen is hovering in front of him, mind is racing a mile a minute.

Hey Wille, it’s Simon

Too boring

Hey Wille, I just wanted you to have my number- it’s Simon by the way

Too awkward

Hey Wille, it’s Simon- the music teacher at Garfield.

Too formal.

All of the options felt like too much or not enough.

Simon spends the entirety of his commute carefully writing and rewriting texts to Wille. He does so in his notes app, of course, to avoid accidentally sending something completely embarrassing to his new crush.

Approaching his building, he aimlessly fumbles through his messenger bag for his keys until he retrieves his simple carabiner keychain to let himself in. The lobby is empty as he fiddles with his mailbox, only to reveal an embarrassing amount of junk mail and flyers. Damon is horrible at remembering to check the mail so the task is usually put off until their mailbox is too full for anything else. Simon sifts through the items one at a time, affirming his suspicion that none of it is important- all junk mail.

Balancing his mug, bag, keys, and mail; Simon manages to open the door which prompts a chuckle from Damon who is watching in awe of the silly sight,

“Girrrrrlllll handsssss”

Damon teases, watching as Simon sets down one item at a time on their entryway table until he is able to take off his rain-soaked jacket.

“New scarf?”

Simon’s blush betrays him and Damon responds with giddy excitement,

“Or should I say, whose scarf?”

Damon is wiggling his eyebrows suggestively and shimmying his shoulders to add emphasis to his question, forever the drama queen.

Simon responds, feigning nonchalance;

“Wille’s”

“Wille’s?? And who is this mysterious Wille?”

“A new substitute teacher filling in for Mrs. Marietta. He’s Swedish actually!”

“No shit! Have you told Ayub or Rosh? They are going to flip. What are the odds that the only three Swedish people I’ve ever met would find a fourth Swedish person in Seattle!”

“I haven’t but you’re right-they are going to lose it.”

Damon continues haphazardly,

“So how do you end up with Wille’s scarf? Andddd why is the question making you blush so bad?”

Grinning at his accurate assessment of the situation, Damon sits smugly, awaiting Simon’s reply.

Simon stifles a chuckle at Damon’s bluntness,

“Well, we were walking together after school, and it was chilly so he offered it to me.”

Deadpan, Damon continues,

“You didn’t answer my second question...”

Simon’s blush deepenes at being caught. Damon has this incredible attention to detail which makes it very challenging to avoid his often on the nose questions.

The unanswered question lingers between them as Simon smiles to himself,

“I wasn’t even blushing but he is quite handsome…
And-he-gave-me-his-number-and-told-me-he-wanted-to-hangout.”

Damon shoots up from his spot on the couch like his team just scored the championship goal.

“I KNEW IT! I fucking knew it. Tell me everything.”

Simon gives an exasperated sigh although he secretly appreciates his friend’s enthusiasm.

“Start from the beginning.”

Simon retells the events of the day and each encounter with Wille in detail. Damon listens attentively, allowing Simon to gush and ramble on without interruption. Once all of his thoughts and feelings are out in the open, Simon allows himself to relax into their couch with a fresh mug of tea, awaiting Damon’s response.

“Simon you’re cute when you’re all flustered!”

Batting his eyelashes with a smirk that makes Simon roll his eyes.

“No seriously though. It sounds like you two might have something worth exploring. He’s definitely interested in youuuu otherwise he wouldn’t have given you his number. You should text him.”

Damon’s confidence is contagious and Simon can’t help but feel affirmed that maybe Wille is interested in him after all.

He pulls out his phone, ready to take initiative;

Hey Wille- thanks for lending me your scarf. It was so cozy for my walk. How about I return it to you over a drink?
[Sent]
[Delivered]

Simon lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding and forces himself not to stare at his phone. Phantom vibrations haunt his evening as he debates what take-away he wants to order. Damon is getting ready for a Grindr date and Simon is glancing between Thai and Indian menus when he sees that orange heart pop up.

[3 New Messages]
Hey Simon. I would love to get drinks.

But keep the scarf

It looks better on you anyway 😏

Simon is stunned, jaw on the floor at the casual confidence Wille boasts. The initial shock turns into a wide smile that that makes his cheek hurt. They are already sore from all the smiling he’s done today.

It’s a date then. Free this weekend?

[Sent]
[Delivered]

Aware of his own eagerness and worried he is coming on too strong, Simon waits. Fortunately, he receives a near immediate response;

[4 New Messages]

All weekend, actually.

Too much? 😅

*play it cool Wille*

You name the time and place, I’ll be there.

Never too much, Simon thinks, chuckling at the series of texts. Wille’s casual vulnerability and eagerness is so refreshing. He wants to reward it with his own charm.

Never too much Wille

You’re cute 😉

The Wash in cap hill at 7:00pm tomorrow?

[Sent]
[Delivered]

Simon knows the Wash isn’t exactly a “safe” bet but it is one of his favorite bars. It’s kitschy and maximalist in a way that always makes Simon smile. The warm red glow is romantic and its walking distance to his favorite, albeit one of the only Venezuelan restaurants in Dane county, in case they get late night hungry.

Satisfied at his quick thinking and attempt at flirting, Simon smiles to himself, excited for tomorrow. Damon enters their living room with an exaggerated twirl; asking how he looks for his date before the doorbell whisks him away.

“Good luck Damon!”

“Honey I don’t need luck when I look this good. Hopefully I won’t see you until tomorrow!”

With a wink, he is gone and Simon is left home alone with his own giddiness.

_

He finally decides on Thai, ordering Khao Soi from a place whose menu has very limited English, always a good sign. Once it arrives at his doorstep, he takes his time assembling the elaborate curry dish with all its toppings.

He eats his noodle soup on the couch in front of some trash tv before indulging in a long hot shower.

***

He lets the hot water permeate his curls and basks in the eucalyptus steam. When he closes his eyes, he thinks of amber eyes and milky skin; imagining how Willes pupils would look blown out with cheeks stained by a blush Simon caused. He allows his hands to wander down his chest, one idly playing with his sensitive nipples while the other sifts through his coarse hair to find his growing erection. Simon allows the water to wash over him while he strokes himself; slowly, without any urgency. He revels in the warm steam surrounding him and imagines Wille’s delicate hands and long fingers everywhere. With the apartment to himself, he doesn’t have to hold back. He lets his breath quicken and moans echo in their small, tiled bathroom, imaging Wille’s soft breath on his neck and the sounds he’d make when he crashed over the edge. God, he was so hot for this man, and they hadn’t even gone on a real date.

***

Simon reluctantly emerges from the shower, changing into a clean set of sweatpants and his cozy purple sweatshirt. Simon checks his phone to reveal

[2 New Messages]

That’s a real compliment coming from you Simon 😉

See you then

Post-orgasmic and giddy for his date, Simon likes the message and boldly responds,

😘

[Sent]
[Delivered]

Chapter Text

Wille barely makes it on the bus before he is dialing Felice’s contact number. It is noon on the east coast so surely she’s awake and getting ready for her day; grocery shopping for whatever specialty dish she was making tonight at the restaurant.

Felice has always had this exceptional attention to detail which made her an exquisite chef. Her vision for complex flavor combinations made her restaurant a near instant success. That, combined with her ability to create a thoughtful dining experience launched her into New York’s critically acclaimed dining scene within a year of opening her doors. Wille feels like a celebrity whenever he visits Felice; her bubbly, warm demeanor combined with her success is intoxicating, inviting friends and strangers alike in.

Wille clutches the overhead handle on the crowded bus while the quiet lull of her ringtone hums in his ear. Felice and Wille talk weekly on Mondays but text consistently; mostly memes or little anecdotes about their days.

“Wille!! Oh my gosh, to what do I owe the pleasure of a Friday call?”

Warmth oozed through the speaker as she gently teases him for the unexpected call.

“I assumed it had to be my mom. Only boomers call without warning.”

He can envision her smile as she hustles around the house, gathering the contents of her purse to venture into the city.

“I can’t just call my best friend just to say hi?”

Wille chirps back, smiling at his own bluff.

“You are either falling in love or falling apart. I don’t make the rules Wille, I know you…And you don’t call out of the blue.”

Wille lets out an audible laugh, sure that the strangers around him will give him a wide girth as he seemingly laughs at nothing.

Pausing a beat before responding, Felice interjects,

“So which is it hun?”

Breathing caught in his own laughter, Wille finally manages,

“Am I so predictable?”

“More like consistent or reliable, love.”

With a sigh and tempered blush, Wille responds,

“I’ve met someone.”

“I KNEW IT!!” booms through the speakers at a volume that makes Wille jump.

“Tell me everything and don’t leave out any juicy details.” Felice adds.

Wille spends the better part of the next 20 minutes talking about his first day and every chance interaction with Simon. His giddiness is palpable, but it feels so good to gush to someone.

Wille has dated before but the spark he feels with Simon was different. The mutual attraction is electric between them, but it feels so much deeper than surface level attraction. The way Simon puts him at ease, creating an environment that makes Wille comfortable being vulnerable is unique. Growing up, Wille became a listener when he quickly realized that most of the elite business folks his family surrounded themselves with are not interested in any of the same topics he is. He was forced to assimilate, keeping his thoughts and opinions to himself. Being vulnerable was synonymous with being embarrassing, so Wille learned to compartmentalize; forcing his own humanity down to survive every social function until he could escape them entirely.

Simon’s gentle and warm demeanor put him at ease while sparking something deeper in his soul. Wille feels drawn to him- physically and emotionally.

While Wille finds folks to pass the time with romantically, he never feels completely comfortable being 100% himself. There hasn’t been anyone patient or gentle enough to take down the walls Wille has carefully assembled in self-preservation. Wille always feels too much for anyone. He is too ‘straight’ for gay men and too ‘gay’ for straight women. He never finds someone who appreciates him outside of the prescribed gender norms our world assigns. He just wants to be seen for him without all of the preconceived notions of gender, sexuality, power, wealth, and status. He just wants to be Wille and more often than not, people makee him feel like that isn’t enough.

Felice has been instrumental in changing his own perception though. She has always been an incredible listener. She’s spent countless hours with Wille over the years, affirming him in a way he so desperately craves. It isn’t one specific instance but a thousand little moments that help heal a part of him he hadn’t realized was hurting. Wille felt like Felice was the first person he could be completely himself with. Her friendship and countless therapy sessions with Boris have helped him to realize his inherent value. Their relationship was a catalyst for Willes own self-discovery and growth. They have always served as each other’s safe space; hence the unprompted afternoon call to gush about his blossoming crush.

As the bus slows for his stop and Wille shuffles off, Felice affirmes that Simon sounds incredible and encourages him to pursue him. With a coy smile, Wille admits;

“Well, I already gave him my number
and-im-worried-i-was-too-much-and-he-wont-call-or-doesn’t-like-me-like-that.”

Before he can further admonish himself at his own eagerness, Felice responds without hesitating;

“Oh, Wille he will call. From everything you’ve told me, he sounds just as eager as you. Respectfully, if you got flirty vibes from him, he was definitely flirting.”

Feigning offense Wille scoffs back.

“I’m serious Wille, you can be a bit… oblivious about that sort of thing.”

Felice continues,

“Remember Esme and Richard and Mika and….”

Wille responds with an exasperated sigh.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get the point. I’m dull.”

“Not dull darling, oblivious to folks obvious ogling at you… Honestly, it’s quite endearing; that doe eyed look of surprise. I can see it all the way from new York city.”

With a sarcastic scoff Wille quips,

“Oh sounds real appealing Felice.”

They share a laugh before Felice wraps up the conversation.

“God Wille I’m so happy you called to tell me about Simon, but I have to get going otherwise the market will be all sold out of Thai Basil and I will be screwed.”

They confirm their routine Monday call and Wille hangs up as he steps into his apartment elevator, happy to share these little moments with his best friend.

Stepping in his threshold, Wille takes one look around his apartment and decides that tonight is for take-out and unpacking. His walls are far too empty to feel remotely homey and he can’t settle in without organizing his space a little better.

He needs music if he is going to tackle this messy space. His daylist is chatty masterpiece Friday afternoon featuring wall street and funk pop with conscious hip hop. How on earth does Spotify come up with these playlists? The titles and names always make him chuckle.

With CATFISH by Doechii booming out of his portable speaker, Wille bobs to the beat;

Let me relax a bit, I think I need to cool off (boom!)
I put some pep up in my step, and then I do it up (boom!)
I shine my cutlery and hit my jeweler up (boom!)

God Doechii is so fucking good. It’s no wonder she is signed by Kendrick. Wille bobs to the beat and starts organizing his living room.

He sorts his artwork and frames, leaning them against whichever wall best suits them. He has to hang his shelf too that will display his record collection.

He can’t help but wonder if Simon likes records? As a musician he assumes he appreciates all types of music and modes of listening to them.

Wille’s thoughts are consumed with this near perfect stranger, envisioning Simon coming over to his 500 square foot apartment and listening to his modest record collection. What album would Simon opt for? Does he know how to use a record player?

He interrupts his own thoughts, using those questions as motivation to continue his cleaning venture. Time evades him as he focuses on the task at hand. It isn’t until his stomach starts grumbling that he decides to order some Indian. It is then that he notices;

[1 New Message from Unknown]

Hey Wille- thanks for lending me your scarf. It was so cozy for my walk. How about I return it to you over a drink?

Simon!

He immediately saved the contact;

Simon🎶

Adding the music emoji for a little something extra. Emboldened from his phone call with Felice, Wille decides to flirt a little back.

Hey Simon. I would love to get drinks.

But keep the scarf

It looks better on you anyway 😏

[Sent]
[Delivered]

Wille is rewarded with a quick response,

[1 New Message]

It’s a date then. Free this weekend?

Oh my gosh, it’s a date. Simon is calling drinks together, a date. Simon wants to go on a date with him! The realization replays on a loop, with a giddiness that has Wille smiling ear to ear. A wave of relief washes over him at the confirmation that not only was Simon queer, he is interested in Wille!

Although he feels comfortable being himself with Simon, he doesn’t want to scare him off with his own eagerness. But in the same breath he doesn’t want to mute himself to be more palatable. Before he can regret it and unwilling to keep Simon waiting, Wille responds;

All weekend, actually.

Too much? 😅

*play it cool Wille*

You name the time and place, I’ll be there.

[Sent]
[Delivered]

Oh my god, did he actually just say that? Holy shit, this man makes him feel brave.

Unable to ignore his growling stomach, Wille calls the Indian place on the corner and places a pickup order for butter chicken with garlic naan. He grabs his keys and jacket to walk the 2 blocks to pick up his order. He needs a little break from his chaotic apartment anyway.

The walk leaves him feeling rejuvenated. The fresh, cold air burns his lungs in a way that makes him feel so present in the moment. He loves the busyness of the Seattle sidewalks and bike lanes. There is always someone out and about, despite the weather. The locals are resilient, undeterred by a little rain or cool wind.

The restaurant is unassuming with a simple shelf, full of pickup orders labeled by name. He retrieves his own paper bag, smiling at the kind eyed older couple behind the counter furiously writing tickets and passing the landline back and forth. How many people are on hold while they do this little dance? It makes Wille smile.

He holds his delicious smelling curried chicken and allows the anticipation to grow over his yummy meal. The walk home is quick, and he doesn’t hesitate before diving into the bag that, luckily, has plastic silverware.

Delicious. He would most likely become a regular there. Halfway through eating, he reaches for his phone to scroll when he notices,

[3 New Messages]

Never too much Wille

You’re cute 😉

The Wash in cap hill at 7:00pm tomorrow?

Unfamiliar with the bar, he googles it, only to realize it was 5 blocks from his apartment. It is so close! And the place itself looks so freaking cool. Of course, Simon choses an artsy, romantic hang out that is quirky and interesting. He is relieved at the pick- Simon didn’t choose somewhere too commercial or boring.

And Simon is calling him cute? The text makes his insides turn liquid and warm. He can’t wait for his date tomorrow.

After scraping the bottom of his tin with the remaining garlic naan, Wille neatly hangs his shelves and art on their respective walls. He hums to himself, enchanted at the thought that he is going on a date tomorrow with Simon.

He works steadily into the evening, determined to have his apartment look presentable- just in case. He doesn’t expect Simon to come home with him tomorrow or anything but he would be so embarrassed if he does and was met with move in chaos.

Once everything has a home and his moving boxes are broken down, Wille hops in a cool shower before snuggling in for the evening. He is a hot sleeper, so he usually only wears boxer briefs and a tee shirt. Tonight, he settles on just the briefs; his sheets are fresh, so he wants as much skin on their clean, crisp surface as possible. He revels in the sensation of freshly showered skin on clean sheets. The feeling is elite.

With the lights off and only a candle burning, Wille allows the day to wash over him. He picks up his phone to write in his note’s app, eager to process some of his first day thoughts. Every time he tries focusing on school, his mind wanders back to Simon.

***

An ache emerges deep in the pit of his stomach, wondering what it would be like to be the recipient of Simons undivided attention. He imagines what it would feel like to run his fingers through the man’s curly hair. He wants to feel his jaw and neck, taste the beads of sweat that emerge from shared passion. Unable to tamper his own desire Wille let his hand slip into his underwear. Half hard at just the thought of Simon, he palms his balls, rutting his growing erection against his forearm until he needs more. Leaking precum and desperate for friction, Wille grabs hold of his dick and imagines Simon’s breath on his neck, his hands on his torso. The image his imagination conjures up makes him hot, urgently pumping his own cock to the rhythm of Simon’s imaginary moans. He comes hard in his underwear, quivering at the quick release, suddenly spent. He slips off his cum stained underwear and curls into his bed naked and satisfied.

***

He checks his phone once more, realizing he never responded to Simon’s earlier message. Blushing and only slightly embarrassed at the fact that he just masturbated to the man on the receiving end of his text, he writes;

That’s a real compliment coming from you Simon 😉

See you then

[Sent]
[Delivered]

God, if Simon only knew the effect he has on him. Wille lets sleep take over, satiated from his orgasm and eager for his date with Simon tomorrow.

Tomorrow.

Chapter Text

Simon

The sun strains through the heavy Seattle clouds and sheer bedroom curtains, gently waking Simon. Although he has grown to enjoys mornings, he appreciates the leisure of the weekends and the lazy pace he allows himself to indulge in.

He stretches his sleep heavy limbs and reaches for his phone, a gen-z habit he hates but succumbs to nonetheless. After slowly scrolling and reading for a little while, he emerges from the cozy covers and makes his way to the bathroom. He always brushed his teeth while boiling his kettle for his morning coffee.

With Damon’s job at Cafe Ladro, they always have a plethora of beans and roasts to choose from. Once his teeth are brushed and the kettle is ready, Simon starts his soothing pour over routine. First, priming his set up and coffee filter. Next, weighing out 20g of a ground medium roast that Damon brought home yesterday. Starting his timer, Simon pours 60g of boiling water over the rich sawdust, pausing a minute before continuing with the other 390g of water.

Simon has become an amateur coffee specialist by proxy; he falls in the middle of Seattle’s bell curve for coffee expertise, but he imagines he would look snobby if he lived anywhere else. Carefully brewed Saturday morning coffee feels sacred. It has become a little ritual that brings him great joy.

He pours his masterpiece into a ceramic mug his sister Sara made him. She has always been so creative. Sara was diagnosed with autism and ADHD as a child. Her perspective always challenges Simon in the most beautiful and refreshing way. When Sara was first diagnosed however, she struggled to regulate her emotions and articulate her feelings in a way that Simon could relate to. Linda, eager to support her daughter and provide a larger community, found a program in their hometown that connected folks with autism with horses; sparking a love that became integral to Sara’s identity. The community was an extension of their family helping them understand one another better. During those early school years, Sara lived at the stables, continuing the hobby for years until university made it difficult to do so. Desperate for connection in the booming city, Sara went to a gallery night at the Nationalmuseam that boasted a visiting exhibit centered around horses; The Last Öland Horse-Featuring New Horse Cultures. While the art itself wasn’t exactly her style, it inspired her to create as an alternative to the equine therapy she had relied on for so long. Her creative hobby merged into a full-blown passion- experimenting with different mediums over time. This mug is a product of one of those exploratory periods.

Simon gingerly drinks his coffee, appreciating its richness and how the flavor changes as it cools. While his body has been awake for nearly an hour, his mind has only just started to wake up.

Today is his date with Wille.

The memories of yesterday flood his mind with a warmth that tugs at his heart strings; their first interaction, their shared lunch, their unexpected walk, and the flirty texts. The last 24 hours feel like the plot of every romcom movie he’s ever watched. Simon thought those type of butterflies only existed in the movies.

Aware of his own distractibility and determined to be productive despite his eagerness, Simon reflects on his to-do list for the day. He pulls up his note app and jots down a simple list. The first two items that come to mind: he needs to do laundry and grocery shop. His clothing options are limited and refrigerator sparse. These tasks are non-negotiable. He adds a couple more work items for the weekend including editing his winter concert program and responding to emails about the solo opportunities he opened up to his students.

With renewed determination, he starts a load of laundry, hopeful for more options of clothing tonight. It is days like today he is grateful for in unit laundry- what a luxury! Once he sorts his laundry and measures the soap, he starts the load. Onto the next.

The morning mist has retreated, revealing patches of blue sky that make the outside look far warmer than it is. Simon laces up his well-loved converse, grabbing his reusable groceries bags before donning his jacket to face the grocery store. AirPods in and hood drawn, he walks the cool shadows of apartment buildings until he arrives at his destination. It only takes him three songs on his daylist to arrive to the closest QFC.

Chill hip hop new school Saturday morning offers him:

Ride by Aaron May
So With That by Cordae
Pomegranate by Kota the Friend

Such a great mix to start his shopping off right.

Sacrifices by Dreamville, EARTHGANG, and J. Cole reverberates through his headphones as he selects a grocery cart and begins in the produce section.

While Simon doesn’t consider himself a chef, he tries to cook several homemade meals a week. He has to get creative, living on a teacher’s salary, but it is much easier with a roommate to split costs and meal prep. Luckily, Linda taught Simon how to stretch a dollar, making meals out of what was available to them growing up.

Produce is limited with the late fall season, but he decides to get some stock veggies for soup that he can double and use in a stir fry. Simon wanders the aisles in no particular rush, planning as he goes and organizing his cart accordingly.

He finishes the venture in just over an hour, neatly sorting and stacking his items before returning to his apartment. The sun is high enough that it reaches the sidewalks now, bathing his deprived skin in its warmth. He exchanges the cool breeze for the vitamin D, allowing the Seattle sun to wash over him while he walks.

Simon enters his apartment as their washing machine chimes its song of completion. The timing is perfect. His first priority is putting away all of the grocery items that require refrigeration and then switching the laundry between machines. He does his little dance between tasks; working steadily until he has a full refrigerator, clean counters, empty grocery bags, and a busy dryer.

The afternoon passes in a quiet blur as he lounges with music playing and laptop open. He mindlessly completes work emails and edits his program until Damon arrives home, drawing him out of his distracted state.

“It appears your date was a success.”

Simon beckons with a sincere smile and arch of his brow,

Damon removes his denim jacket and scarf to reveal a collar littered in love bites;

“A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell… Lucky for you Simon, I am not a gentleman.”

Simon swats at the couch, pushing his laptop shut and motioning for Damon to join him. The two giggle as he saunters over, ready to share his escapades with his eager roommate.

Damon, unfairly confident and rarely shy, shares the events of his night in detail. Damon is so assured in his own vulnerability, making him a great gossip and even better friend.

Simon allows himself to get wrapped up in his recounting of the evening, listening intently to his long winded and larger than life friend.

Simon’s alarm interrupts Damon as was about to expand on the compromising position he was in when they got interrupted by the bouncer doing a final sweep of the bathrooms before last call.

“Oh my god I have to start getting ready for my date!”

Damon can’t contain his excitement,

“Your WHAT?!??”

Processing the smile spreading across Simon’s face, Damon continues;

“Oh my god is this with Wille???”

Hopping up with a renewed focus, Simon shares a stupid grin with Damon,

“Yes, and I have no idea what I’m going to wear! Help!!!”

Simon flashes his puppy dog eyes and the two men spring into action, assessing Simon’s closet for an appropriate outfit, sorting through his everyday work clothes to find something a touch sexier without looking like he was trying too hard.

They settle on a pair of loose black jeans that cling to his waist while accentuating his petite figure. They are long enough that he can wear his favorite black, squared toed, leather boots. They elevate the look without feeling too dressy. Simon layers a tight white tee-shirt with a soft, deep blue jumper that illuminates his golden skin. He can’t forget accessories either. They agree on two simple gold chains to warm the look, paired with a couple of his favorite rings on each hand.

“You look hotttttt Simon!”

Blushing at Damons compliment, Simon gives a slow twirl,

“You think so? It’s not too much?”

“No- fuck no, Simon you look so good!”

Seldom bashful, Damon gives an approving nod at his roommate,

“Seriously bro, my work here is done.”

Imitating a fairy god mother, Damon shooes Simon in the direction of the door,

“Go get your mans honey!”

Simon grabs his cross-body bag and a rain jacket before blowing a kiss to Damon.

“Thanks for all of your help.”

With a tilt of his brow and smile, Simon continues,

“I can’t wait to hear the rest of that story when I get home.”

“I hope you will have one of your own after tonight.”

Damon chuckles, wiggling his eyebrows and shooting Simon an effortless wink.

“Byeeee Damon!”

Simon smiles as pulls the door closed behind him, grateful for his roommate and excited for his date.

—

When he arrives at the bar, Simon scans the room for Wille, waiting to order until his date arrives. He opts for a booth that is cozy and more secluded than the others, far from the door to avoid the cool night air.

He notices Wille first as he ducks in through the front door, annoyingly handsome in a pea coat and dark jeans that highlight his long legs. He is wearing a whimsical, soft pink jumper whose neckline reveals a delicate gold cross that sits deliciously on his sternum. He looks insanely handsome.

Butterflies erupt in Simon’s chest, and he raises a hand to wave Wille over. Nervous but eager to close the gap between them, Simon rises from their bench and wraps him in a warm hug. It should have been more awkward than it was- he barely knew this man- and yet, Simon feels oddly comfortable. Wille, stiffeners at the surprise greeting but quickly returns the gesture, pulling Simon’s waist tight and mimicking his squeeze. Wille’s hands felt so large yet delicate, spanning his waist and back in a way that makes Simon feel lightheaded with lust.

“Hi Simon” Wille murmurs into his hair as he reluctantly withdraws from their embrace.

“Hi Wille” Simon responds, breathy and content.

The men exchange a wide-eyed smile before Simon continues,

“Take a seat and I’ll grab us some drinks! What’s your poison?”

“Usually, a martini or gin and tonic but I can grab them!” Wille chimes

“You get the next round, Wille. This one’s on me.”

Simon winks at Wille, eliciting a smile that he hopes to repeat again and again and again.

He approaches the bar, ordering two gin martinis, knowing that they have the best blue cheese stuffed olives here.

Once the bartender produces their delectable drinks, Simon returns to their booth, carefully setting them down before sliding in next to Wille.

“Skal” Simon offers with a smile before clinking glasses.

“Skal” Wille returns, a bright undeniable glimmer in his eyes.

“You look incredible, by the way. I really like your boots.”

Simon cannot control the way his entire body flushes at the compliment, surprised at Wille’s attention to detail, down to his shoes.

Flattered, Simon retorts,

“You clean up nice too Wille. I really like this.”

Already snuggled close, Simon inches forward and touches the back of his hand to Wille’s necklace, gentle taking it between his fingers.

He is delighted by the effect the small touch has on his date; jaw slack, eyes bright and cheeks flush. The air between them is electric. Simon is determined to enjoy this.

Simon follows Wille’s gaze and tactfully ignores the bright blush.

“Tack” Wille says quietly before bridging the moment with a question,

“Also…this bar is so cool. How did you find this place?”

Smiling at the ease with which the conversation continues, Simon explains how his friend Rosh came here for a Dyke Night once upon a time and their friend group has been coming back ever since.

Simon describes his friend group and how they all wound up across the ocean together. Wille listens attentively, asking genuine follow up questions with a gentleness that is sincere and refreshing. The conversation continues with ease. The men sip their cocktails, sharing stories and lingering touches as the night goes on, bashful but smitten.

“Simon, you’re telling me that you’ve never seen Sleepless in Seattle?”

Simon rolls his eyes and clicks his tongue at the theatrics with which Wille poses the question.

“Seriously?” Wille continues, shaking his head in fake disappointment.

“That’s it. Let’s close the tab. We have to watch it. I cannot continue this date in good conscience knowing that you’ve never seen Sleepless in Seattle, Simon.”

Simon huffs a laugh, returning Wille’s stare,

“Are you serious?”

Wille smiles wide and extends a hand to Simon,

“Deadly serious I’m afraid. Lucky for you, I only live 5 blocks away and I own it on DVD.”

Simon lets out a guttural laugh at the suggestion, secretly delighted at the prospect of going back to Wille’s place and continuing their date outside of these four walls.

Without hesitation, Simon takes Wille’s hand and shrugs,

“Lucky for me indeed… let’s go.”

Wille’s grin makes Simon dizzy. His crooked teeth are on full display as he smiles ear to ear.

They close their tab and leave, hand in hand.

Wille nods his head,

“This way”

And all Simon can do is smile in return.

Chapter Text

Wille wakes up slowly and then all at once. He has always been that way, since he was a little boy. Once he decides he is ready to get out of bed, he moves with purpose. While Wille doesn’t mind slow, lazy mornings; his mind is often too busy to indulge them.

Today is no different. Wille stretches his long limbs and opens the shades to reveal blue sky peeking out from Seattle’s low hanging clouds. It always feels like a glimpse into another world, an alternative reality that is sunny and bright. When the sky opens up, Seattle becomes a different kind of sanctuary that everyone would retreat to, if they knew. Wille clings to those moments, appreciating the complex beauty of the area.

With eagerness to venture outside and take in some of the interspersed sunshine, Wille quickly gets ready for the day. A man of routine, he goes through his morning motions. First, brushing his teeth. Next, washing his face. He applies sunscreen and deodorant before dressing in casual joggers and a sweatshirt. With no real agenda for the day, Wille dresses for comfort. He adds a hat for the notorious ocean breeze and wears his high-top vans to walk as long as he wants.

Grabbing a jacket and vest, Wille leaves his apartment with no particular destination in mind but the hope of finding some strong coffee.

The sidewalks are sleepy, Seattleites still snoozing meanwhile Wille wanders the city with wonder. Capitol Hill is quintessential community living in a city center. With mid-rise apartment buildings and quaint craftsman houses alike, the area blends old and new architecture in a way that feels familiar and cozy.

Wille follows the smell of coffee in the early morning quiet until he reaches a quaint cafe with a pup manning the front door. The shaggy companion lays out, patiently waiting for their human’s return, glancing at the door each time it opens. An older gentleman finally emerges with a cup of hot coffee and the two gingerly go on their way sans leash.

The freshly ground beans hit his senses as he takes in the warm interior. A chalk board on the wall behind the register lists the menu options with a subsection dedicated to seasonal flavors. While Wille usually prefers his first cup of the day to be black, but the sound of a Black Sea salt, hot honey latte sounds too good to pass up. He indulges in the drink, ordering from a quiet bearded gentleman with wire frame glasses and a beanie while a barista with blue hair and a lip ring steams his milk.

He waits patiently, watching the employees work and appreciating the brief reprieve from the cool breeze outside.

When they call his name, he grabs his latte and continues on his walk to nowhere. He watches as folks emerge from their houses, walking their dogs and picking up their newspaper from its spot on their stoop. The neighborhood is slowly waking up and he is witness to its beautiful morning routine.

Once he sips the last bit of foam from his latte, Wille makes his way across the highway and down towards the water. He heads towards Pike Place Market, appreciating the increasingly clear view of the water beyond the skyscrapers of the downtown business district.

To his delight, many of the vendors are already open but the stalls are quiet; tourists and cruise ship passengers not yet ascending on the infamous market.

He wanders between booths, making small talk to the friendly faces staffing them. The market overwhelms his senses. The dampness of the stone floors. The fresh fish on ice. The sweet florals. The pachouli incense. The yeast of fresh bread. All of the smells mix in the cold, damp air as folks shuffle through. He watches as the line for the first ever Starbucks grows around the corner and the open hallways become packed with late morning shoppers.

Satisfied with his exploration, Wille begins his trek back up the many hills to his apartment, enjoying the strips of sunshine that make its way through the outstretched buildings. The walk is long but worthwhile. He is glad to spend the morning outside, even if it means wearing extra layers to do so.

He peels off his jacket and vest upon returning home. A chill had settled in his bones, so Wille decides to take a leisurely bubble bath.

He lets the water heat up and adds some epsom salt and Dr. Teals bubble bath before relaxing into it. Wille loves the quiet hum of a bathtub. It always feels like a lovely escape where he can read or write without interruption.

He opens the notes app on his phone and starts writing and rewriting; allowing his train of thought to wander without a real goal. His gold cross shimmers in the suds, begging the question of who God is.

The poem spills out of him. When he finishes, the bath water is tepid and the bubbles disappeared into a surface film.

God

I don’t know what I believe anymore

Church left me with a thorn in my side Religion left me with an ache in my chest
God left me

Who is God anyway?
But the compilation of power-hungry men
Systems in place whose aim is control

Who is God?
But the reflection of your parents
Repeating the call and response idly

Who is God?
But the arms of a familiar lover
Their body, your communion

Who is God?
But the first sip of coffee in the morning
A sacrifice to your body for rising from the bed

Who is God?

With pruned skin and another piece to add to his collection, Wille drains the bath and towels off. Feeling noncommittal about what he wants to wear for his date tonight, Wille dons some fresh sweatpants and another well-loved sweatshirt to snuggle into his couch. The apartment is tidy from his cleaning escapades last night so he allows himself to lounge.

He puts a Zach Bryan album on and allows the quiet folk music to lull him to sleep. He bathes in the sunshine on his couch until the sky fades into cotton candy pink and his alarm startles him awake. He can’t believe it is already 6:00pm! Thank goodness he had the forethought to set an alarm.

Shaking the sleep from his limbs, Wille stretches, heading to his bedroom to find something to wear. He had looked up the bar Simon recommended, so he has a general idea of what the atmosphere is like. Nonetheless, he is still slightly nervous and eager to impress. He settles on his favorite pair of dark wash, straight leg Levi’s and a pink jumper to match. The pattern is subtle but funky. It feels like the right balance for a first date. He loosely styles his hair and paints his nails a barely there pink to match his sweater. Hopefully it will prevent him from picking at his cuticles- an unfortunate habit of his anxiety.

Wille sits impatiently, waiting for his nail polish to dry before he does a final clean sweep of his house. He grabs his wallet, keys, phone, and jacket. Wille decides on his pea coat rather than his rain jacket to elevate the look a touch. Plus, he only had to walk 5 blocks so the style factor feels worth the risk.

Wille arrives to the crowded bar right on time, 7:00pm. The place is packed already; with folks standing, lingering, and loitering from the windows to the doors. The light is dim and romantic, making it difficult to see everyone in the room but the perfect atmosphere for their date. Wille is searching for a crown of curls in a sea of people when a friendly wave catches his attention.

Simon.

He makes his way through the congregating friend groups towards the back of the bar where Simon has claimed a perfect booth in the privacy of the rooms edge.

Simon, Simon, Simon.

He looks incredible, handsome, confident, beautiful, marvelous, and ravishing. Even as a poet, he is running out of adjectives to describe his date. He is wearing loose black jeans that highlight his slender waist and taper out to show off a pair of edgy heeled boots. He has an impossibly soft looking dark blue jumper draped over his chest, clinging to him in all the right ways. His rings catch Wille’s attention as he watches the man wave him over.

Forcing himself out of his love drunk stupor, Wille approaches Simon and is surprised by the warm, fierce hug Simon pulls him into. He relaxs into the shorter man’s embrace and allows himself to reciprocate, pulling him in by the waist and basking in this closeness.

Somehow, Simon looks even more beautiful close up. His scent is warm with notes of citrus and vanilla. He could have stayed this way for a long time but forces himself to let go, whispering hello as he does so.

“Hi Wille” Simon responds, seemingly just as doe eyed and eager as he is.

Wille can’t help the smile plastered on his face.

Simon gestures towards their booth,

“Take a seat and I’ll grab us some drinks! What’s your poison?”

Wille manages to respond,

“Usually, a martini or gin and tonic but I can grab them!”

Wille is suddenly shy at the prospect of Simon buying his drink but before he can second guess himself, Simon responds,

“You get the next round Wille. This one’s on me.”

With such casual confidence, Simon winks and walks towards the bar to fetch their beverages. His cheeks are already sore from smiling.

It isn’t long before Simon returns to Wille with two very dirty martinis. He sets their drinks down carefully, arranging himself comfortably in the booth. Simon doesn’t waste a moment and raises his glass,

“Skal”

“Skal” Wille repeats.

The ability to speak in Swedish is such a lovely addition to their dynamic. The comfortable native language feels extra special, knowing they share it.

Wille can’t help himself,

“You look incredible by the way. I really like your boots.”

Despite the dim light, Wille appreciates the beautiful blush that spreads across Simon’s cheeks at the compliment.

Without skipping a beat, Simon responds,

“You clean up nice too Wille. I really like this.”

Wille experiences the moment in slow motion as Simon scoots closer and takes his chain cross between his fingers. He forgets how to breathe as the electricity between them consumes any remaining air.

He feels his cheeks burn as he stares at Simon’s delicate hands with a beautiful array of rings on his chest.

“Tack” Wille manages. Unwilling to let his own awkwardness derail the moment, he continues with a question,

“Also, this bar is so cool. How did you find this place?”

The greater part of the next hour is spent in easy conversation. Simon explains how he found this bar through one of his close friends, Rosh who is Swedish too! Simons eyes lit up as he describes his friends and family with a loyal love that makes Wille’s heart soar. He listens with great interest, eager to discover all of the layers of Simon that he is willing to share. The handsome man is interesting and engaging and passionate and honest and authentic, and he cannot get enough of him. Wille drinks in his words with a thirst that can only be quenched by more.

More Simon.

Their conversation feels so natural with a delicious banter that made Wille giddy,

“Simon, you’re telling me that you’ve never seen Sleepless in Seattle?”

Simon responds with a dramatic eye roll and clicking of the tongue that makes Wille almost loose his train of thought.

“Seriously?” Wille manages, shaking his head in fake disbelief.

This was his shot. Wille was going make a move. The night was going so well, and he can’t allow this opportunity to pass him by. In a stroke of genius or fit of lunacy, Wille slams his hands on the table;

“That’s it. Let’s close the tab. We have to watch it. I cannot continue this date in good conscience knowing that you have never seen Sleepless in Seattle, Simon.”

If the smile on his face is any indication, Simon is on board. His dark brown eyes return Wille’s stare as if to confirm what he is suggesting,

“Are you serious?”

Wille can’t help the smile that spreads as he extends his hand to Simon,

“Deadly serious I’m afraid. Lucky for you, I only live 5 blocks away and I own it on DVD.”

Simon lets out a guttural laugh that makes Wille absolutely feral. With a mischievous grin, Simon takes Wille’s hand and shrugs;

“Lucky for me indeed… let’s go.”

The two smile, giddy and eager. They close their tab and leave, hand in hand.

The noise of the bar fades as they step into the thick night air, through a cloud of smoke to the open sidewalks.

Wille gestures,

“This way”

And they are off.

Chapter Text

The damp air is heavy on his skin, but he hardly notices as he stares at the large pale hand intertwined with his own. The mist hovers like the cloud of cigarette smoke they wandered through to exit the bar. Simon has a subtle buzz; from the alcohol or the date, he couldn’t tell.

The walk was casual, the quiet, refreshing. The sounds of the bar had muffled their conversation but out in the open, it was just them.

“I can’t believe you live so close to this place! I’m so jealous. I always go to this Venezuelan restaurant around the corner when I’m in the neighborhood.”

Letting out a home sick groan, Simon continues,

“I mean, they have nothing on Linda’s cooking, but it always feels like a little piece of home.”

Stopping short, Wille gently tugs on Simon’s hand,

“Let’s grab something there! We can take it to go. We need something to snack on during our movie anywayyy.”

Simon cant contain his smile at the exaggerated emphasis of Wille’s ‘anyway’.

“I mean, I am kinda hungry.”

With raised eyebrows and a reciprocal smile, Simon continues,

“Are you sure? Have you had Venezuelan food before?”

Wille chuckles before admitting,

“No but I think I could like it.”

The twinkle in his eye was undeniable and Simon can’t help but wonder if they were talking about more than food.

Feigning ignorance, Simon continues,

“You never know unless you try.”

They share a smirk at the undercurrent of their conversation before heading in the direction of the restaurant.

The warmth hits them as the bell chimes at their entry. Maria is working which always proved promising.

“Simon, mi amor, ¡qué gusto verte! ¿Cómo están linda y la familia?”

Matching her enthusiasm, Simon responds in quick Spanish,

“Mama es buena, trabaja muchas horas extras. Siempre tienen poco personal durante esta época del año.”

“Y como esta Luis? ¿Se siente mejor?”

“Mucho mejor desde que llegó a casa. Odiaba esa cama de hospital. And who is this?”

Simon tries to control his blush as he squeezes Wille’s hand,

“Maria this is my friend Wille.”

With a knowing glance reminiscent of his own abuela, Maria smirks before nodding in response.

“It’s nice to meet you Wille.”

“Likewise!” Wille returns with a warm, shy smile.

Without hesitating, Maria continues,

“What’ll it be today boys?”

Simon places their order which consists of a little of everything. He nearly levitates at the anticipation of it all; delicious food, their ongoing date, Wille’s apartment…

As the two turn on their heels to leave, food in hand, Maria whispers in a hushed tone that was a little too loud to be considered a whisper,

“He’s handsome Simon.”

And a little louder,

“You two have a nice night.”

Maria’s quiet giggle dissipates as the two continue on their way.

—

Simon holds the food while Wille juggles his keys to let them into his apartment. The space is tidy and oddly lived in despite Wille only moving in a week ago. The space oozes creativity; littered with books and notebooks, a telltale of Wille’s passion. Simon immediately notices the small, modest record player and his impressive record collection on display. Simon drinks in the space as he takes off his shoes and jacket. Wille sets his keys in a dish by the door and follow suits. Setting the food down on his kitchen island, Simon wanders towards the shelved record display. He holds his hands behind his back as he assesses the albums, ascertaining Wille’s music preference. Nodding in appreciation, Simon gives Wille a coy smile across the room.

His handsome date breaks the silence,

“See anything you like?”

Simon unlinks his hands and drags his fingers across the paper covers, pulling them out one by one. He nods with an affirmative hum, impressed by the variety of genres and artists before looking at Wille.

Their eye contact is intense and delicious. Simon can’t help himself,

“Yeah, I do” he says as he scans Wille up and down.

Wille’s face flushes and Simon aches at how beautiful he looks. Wille’s angled jaw and pale complexion make him look strong and fierce but every time that blush erupts, it softens him in a way that makes him even more handsome.

Both men hold their breath as Wille crosses the room to Simon. Wille’s eyes bore into him but Simon stares back with confident resolve.

Wille is so close that Simon can smell the liquor on his breath and cologne on his neck. Wille places his hand on the small of his back, meanwhile his other hand reaches around to the record Simon’s finger lingered on. The touch makes Simon desperate with desire. Want pools in his abdomen as Wille quietly whispers in the space between them,

“Hmmm that is a good choice.”

Simon can’t help the goosebumps that erupt on his neck at Wille’s breath. His heart is racing, and he is sure Wille can hear it if he listens close enough. He closes his eyes in an effort to reign in his own desire, but he is not sure he wants to anymore.

Breathy with yearning, he opens his eyes and turns his head to face Wille. Wille’s warm amber eyes are dark with the same desire Simon feels, pupils blown. Wille licks his lips and that is enough temptation for Simon to close the gap. Simon’s hand drops from the record as he turns to Wille and places a warm kiss on his chapped lips. Despite being wind bitten, Simon can’t get enough of the feeling of their lips pressed together. Confident in his own desire, Simon deepens their kiss, pressing more firmly into Wille, bringing his free hand up to cradle his face. Simon needs to touch him. He needs Wille closer.

Wille returns the kiss with a gentle fervor. His lips moving in perfect timing to his own. Wille’s hand tightens around Simon’s waist and he nearly moans at the pressure. Eager and yearning, Simon wraps both arms around Wille’s neck, bringing their bodies flush. Willes chest feels delicious against Simon’s and the pressure sends electricity down his spine. Wille’s hands move with confidence, exploring Simon’s back and waist as their shared breath runs ragged.

Simon’s fingers move from Wille’s pulse point to his soft hair. He’s using his fingernails to softly scratch Wille’s head as he pulls himself ever closer. He hears a muffled groan and he can’t take any more space between them.

Simon moves his hands from Wille’s crown to his chest, gently pushing the taller man back to the couch behind them. The movement is messy and hot, desire oozing between them as Wille’s legs hit the base of the couch.

Simon reluctantly separates their lips as he gently pushes Wille back onto the couch. He takes in the sight of Wille; dilated pupils, messy hair, and kiss bitten lips. He was panting and ravenous. After taking a moment to appreciate the view, his eyes meet Willes, and they share a vulnerable, giddy giggle.

Wille’s voice is sexy and low when he breaks the silence,

“Come back. I want you close.”

Simon doesn’t need to be told twice. He wants the same thing. He is just as desperate to feel Wille under him.

Simon straddles him, answering Wille with a deep, desperate kiss. He sucks on his lips, leaving small bites when he needs to breathe, unwilling to separate them completely. They are fighting for the lead in a dance that was new to them both, learning one another’s bodies in the heat of passion. Simon takes note of each groan of delight and aims to replicate it over and over again.

Simon feels Wille’s hardening length press into his jeans and he couldn’t have been more turned on if he tried. Eager to have as much of Wille as he would allow, Simon tugs on the hem of his sweater and belt loop of jeans.

“I want to feel your skin Wille. I want you.”

The guttural groan of delight in response goes straight to Simon’s groin. His own erection fighting against his jeans and the sounds Wille was making wasn’t helping the situation.

“Please Simon”

Breathy and desperate, Wille continues,

“I want you too. I need you.”

Simon can’t help the way he rocks against Wille’s lap at the confession. Simon lets out a plea that might sound desperate in any other circumstance, but he didn’t care.

Rocking forward to regain his own balance, Wille lifts Simon in one fell swoop. Simon’s breath hitches and his legs clench around Wille’s slender but strong physique as he carries him to his bedroom. Too turned on to care, Simon lets out a giggle followed by an exaggerated groan,

“Fuck Wille, that was so hot.”

Pleased with himself, Wille sets Simon down on the edge of his bed and let his hands skim under Simon’s sweater. Wille kneels in front of him, gently pushing the fabric up while the two maintain eye contact.

“Is this okay Simon?”

Simon’s breath hitches and he thinks better of begging, settling on

“Pleassee Wille”

An attentive lover, Wille lifts the layers off of Simon, revealing his toned chest. Wille touches Simon’s tattoo on his collar bone before placing the gentlest kiss on the same spot. Wille looks at him with a reverence that feels so much sweeter than simple lust. He feels desired carnally.

“May I?” Simon asks, gesturing to his own hands that are stroking the soft pink sweater covering all too much of Wille’s chest.

A grin befitting a lovesick fool emerges from the man’s face and Simon was eager to allow his wandering hands under the soft fabric, to feel his bare chest. Riddled with freckles, Simon sees constellations looking back at him.

Simon places several barely there kisses on Wille’s chest as he lifts his sweater overhead and Wille moans at his touch. Impatient, Wille pulls Simon up and their eager lips met again. Hot and wet, all tongue and teeth, as if they couldn’t bear to be apart for even a moment.

Matching Wille’s eagerness, Simon begins unbuttoning his own pants, letting them fall to his ankles as Wille pulls him even closer. Wille wordlessly follows suit, stepping out of his jeans and closing the distance between the two. Simon shuffles back onto the bed, beckoning Wille to join him.

Simon watches Wille’s erection bob as he stumbles forward, subconsciously licking his lips. He wants to take Wille apart piece by piece with his tongue and touch. Simon isn’t sure there will ever be enough time for everything he wants with Wille but he’s willing to give it a shot.

Usually this much eye contact during a hook up is awkward but with Wille it feels so right.

Wille hovers above Simon, reciprocating the stare. Wille’s eyes are searching and warm, the tenderness he sees amidst the hot longing is incredibly sexy. Simon takes in the sight and marvels at how undone he already feels just from making out with this man. He tucks a falling strand of Wille’s hair behind his ear, stroking his cheek in the process. The moment is so beautifully intimate. Wille’s eyes are wide with the same emotion, and he places a gentle kiss on Simon’s hand. They stay like this for a moment before their lips find one another, yet again.

Wille lowers himself onto Simon and the pressure of the larger man with their shared kisses sends him over the edge. Simon is painfully hard as he ruts against Wille in his briefs. He can feel Wille’s length through what little fabric they have on and he knows he could come just from this.

“Simon, what do you want?” Wille whispers his hot breath against the other man’s ear.

Simon can’t help the moan that escapes him at the question. He knows what he wants, what he needs.

“I want you inside me Wille. I want you to fuck me.”

The statement sounds more like a plea, but Simon doesn’t have time to feel self-conscious. Not with Wille. The groan and involuntary rut in response from Wille is enough to dissipate his own doubts.

“Fuck Simme. I want that too.”

At the admission, a flip switches and longing takes over. Wille firmly grabs his jaw and starts kissing down Simon’s neck; wet languid kisses where spit trails, leaving him wet with want. Wille whispers sweet nothings as he goes, complimenting Simon in a way that feels so vulnerable and beautiful. Wille stops to tease his nipples, sucking on the pebbles and drawing a long moan out of Simon. He couldn’t help the way Wille makes him feel.

Will continues his invisible path down Simon’s body, arriving at his briefs. Wille hooks his fingers inside their elastic, waiting for Simon’s eye contact and nod of approval before shimmying the fabric down his body.

Simon was laid out for Wille, his erection leaking pre-cum onto his abdomen; completely vulnerable. Wille looks at him as if he put the stars in the sky.

“You look so beautiful Simon.”

Wille strokes his hands up and down his body, taking in the sight of Simon. Wille’s eyes stay on Simon as he lowers himself back onto the bed,

“I would like to put my mouth on you and open you up myself, is that okay?”

Simon could come from the question. Wille asking for consent, what he wants, and so vulnerably, is the hottest thing he’s ever experienced.

“Yes Wille, I need you.”

was all Simon can manage, and the smile that spreads on Wille’s face feels like the icing on the cake.

Wille follows Simon’s happy trail, peppering it with kisses as he goes. Big, lust filled eyes meet his gaze as he gently adjusts Simon’s legs, opening them up for better access. Simon closes his eyes at the sight of Wille kissing his thighs, his cock throbbing with anticipation for what is to come.

Lost in the sensation, Simon rolls his hips, pressing them against Wille’s strong hands as the kisses grow increasingly sloppy and dangerously close to the place he needs it most. He feels Wille adjust his position, moving one hand underneath Simon’s ass and the other to the base of his leaking cock. With filthy care, Wille licks his hand before finally, finally touching Simon. The sensation is glorious. Simon arches his back and lets out a pent up groan that he has been stifling, eliciting a smile from the man stroking him deliciously slow before adding his mouth to the mix. Wille’s plump, kiss bitten lips open up enough to take Simon’s length in, surrounding him with warmth while idly stroking his base. The pleasure feels nearly too much to bear; achingly tender with a filthy heat that builds and builds. Simon can’t help himself and grabs Wille’s hair, wrapping his fingers through its silky strands to feel even closer to the man bringing him so much pleasure.

Wille’s eyes widen as he pops off Simon’s head, still slowly stroking him as he places a kiss on Simon’s hip,

“Can you do something for me, babe?”

The octave of Wille’s voice was low with want and Simon can’t help but stare back at the gorgeous man between his legs.

Babe.

“Anything.”

Simon’s response elicits an achingly sweet chuckle from Wille.

“I have lube in my beside table. Will you grab it and pass it to me?”

Propping himself up on his elbows, Simon reaches into the drawer next to the bed, carefully passing the lube to Wille.

Wille removes his hand from its spot on Simon to accept the bottle. Simon can’t help his whine at the loss of contact.

In the process he notices Wille’s smug smile and reciprocates it.

Wille puts a generous helping of lube on his fingers before assuming his position between Simon’s legs. Placing sweet kisses on his hips and thighs, Simon feels Wille’s lube-soaked fingers move down his perineum to his hole. Unable to wait any longer Simon begs,

“Please Wille”

to which his date responds with one long finger pushing past his entrance. Simon is tight but the push and pull of Wille’s fingers combined with the wet kisses he was planting everywhere felt heavenly. After several minutes of delicious torture Simon cooed,

“More”

With a quick nod of his head and smiling kiss to his hip, Wille adds a second finger; eliciting a low moan. Simon begins moving his hips to Wille’s rhythm, meeting him with each twist of his fingers. Before long, Simon is ready for a third and Wille happily obliges. The two are a moaning mess as they move in sync. Unable to wait any longer, Simon breaks their cries of passion with a simple request. Breathy and unable to maintain his composure he reiterates,

“Wille, I want you inside me.”

Wille responds with a guttural moan that makes Simon ache as Wille pulls his fingers out, leaving him clenching around nothing.

Simon moves to flip onto all fours when Wille gently grabs his forearm.

“If it’s okay with you, I’d like to watch you when we’re fucking.”

Almost shy, despite the filthy request he was making, Wille adds,

“I want you close.”

And who was Simon to deny this achingly beautiful man in front of him anything. Simon desperately wants that too. Without hesitating, Simon pulls Wille in for a deep, passionate kiss before responding,

“I want that too.”

With ease, they shift into a comfortable position and Wille lines his throbbing cock up with Simon’s aching entrance. Applying more lube, Wille gently pushes in, waiting for Simon to adjust before bottoming out.

Simon relaxes in pleasure as he adjusts to Wille’s huge dick. He feels so full, so completely consumed by this beautiful man. Simon forces his eyes open, pulling Wille closer and wrapping his legs around the man’s waist.

“You feel so good Wille.”

Wille’s face is blissed out, brow furrowed in pleasure and mouth slightly agape with lust. Simon shifts positions, rutting against Wille, eager for more. Exchanging a desperate look and affirming nod, Wille begins thrusting into Simon, painfully slow at first, before picking up his rhythm. Wille’s cock fills Simon completely, hitting that spot deep in his core that sends shivers through his entire body. Simon holds Wille impossibly close, feeling his body weight on him while his cock works him open.

Simon’s own cock remains untouched between them, the friction pushing him that much closer to the edge. Wille’s pace matches Simon’s erratic thrusts back; both men are undoubtedly close to orgasm.

Between the sounds of their moans and soft slapping of their skin, Simon manages,

“I want you to come for me Wille.”

Wille lets out a deep groan followed by a series of unintelligible profanities,

“Fuck Simme, fuck fuck fuck”

Simon can’t stop his own wave of pleasure from overtaking him. His orgasm takes over and Simon comes hard between their stomachs as Wille pounds into him. Simon lets out a loud moan as he rides the wave of his own orgasm while Wille follows suit. Wille’s face twists in pleasure as he let his seed spill deep inside Simon, sharing this moment together. Wille collapses onto Simon, and he pulls the man close as his body twitches in pleasure. Simon leaves gentle kisses on his neck as he holds Wille through his release. Simon feels whole in that moment, so completely cared for by Wille.

Eventually, Wille’s face emerges from the crook of Simon’s neck, and he plants an impossibly gentle kiss on his lovers lips. Simon holds his eye contact, bringing his hands to Wille’s cheeks in a sweet embrace before pulling him in for a hug. Shifting his weight to pull out, but Simon interrupts,

“Not yet, Wille. I want you to stay for another moment, if that’s okay.”

Suddenly shy at his own request, Simon blushes, hearing how it sounds out loud. Luckily, Wille responded with a wide, toothy grin before relaxing into the other man,

“Of course.”

Simon isn’t sure how long they lay intertwined; exchanging soft, lazy kisses but it doesn’t matter. He revels in each moment of closeness as they recover from their shared bliss.

Chapter Text

The cool night air was a welcome reprieve from the busy bar. Confident in his decision, he continues holding Simon’s hand as they swerve through the smoking section of the sidewalk in the direction of his apartment.

Although his hands are slightly clammy from his own nerves, Simon doesn’t
seem to mind, holding firm.

Simon interrupts the comfortable silence with,

“I can’t believe you live so close to this place! I’m so jealous. I always go to this Venezuelan restaurant around the corner when I’m in the neighborhood.”

Wille smiles at the cute groan Simon lets out,

“I mean, they have nothing on Linda’s cooking, but it always feels like a little piece of home.”

Eager to do just about anything for his handsome date, Wille suggests,

“Let’s grab something there! We can take it to go. We need something to snack on during our movie anywayyy.”

Wille can’t help the smirk on his face as he exaggerates his words to make Simon smile.

“I mean, I am kinda hungry.”

A flash of hesitation washes over Simon’s face as he continues,

“Are you sure? Have you had Venezuelan food before?”

Without skipping a bear, Wille admits,

“No but I think I could like it.”

Wille can’t help the flush that emerges as he says it out loud. He is most certainly not talking about Venezuelan food. Simon seems to understand the undercurrent of what they are talking about but spares Wille the embarrassment,

“You never know unless you try.”

Fortunately, the men arrive to the restaurant before Wille can further incriminate himself.

The restaurant is unassuming, with a long-crowded counter and a few scattered tables. The atmosphere is casual, and it makes Wille feel a part of something bigger than himself. There is something so refreshing about stepping into another culture, another person’s home, that makes him feel at peace. The irony is hard to miss but it holds so true for him.

To Wille’s delight and surprise, the older woman behind the counter greets Simon with great enthusiasm, speaking in very fast Spanish,

“Simon, mi amor, ¡qué gusto verte! ¿Cómo están linda y la familia?”

Matching her energy, Simon responds and Wille has to pick his own jaw up off the floor. If he thought Simon’s voice was attractive in English and Swedish, he was sorely underestimating the effect that Spanish would have on him. Simon’s quick Spanish was undeniably sexy.

Distracted by the effortless charm Simon exhibits, Wille half listens to their quick conversation until the warm stranger’s voice transitions into English,

“… And who is this?”

Forcing himself back to reality, Wille refocuses his attention on what Simon is saying,

“Maria this is my friend Wille.”

Is Simon blushing at his introduction? The kind eyed woman notices it too, her smile wide, watching the two men stumble over themselves.

“It’s nice to meet you Wille.”

Trying to reign in his own giddiness and obvious distraction, Wille only manages,

“Likewise!”

Wille is only slightly embarrassed at his lack of proper etiquette, all out the window at the sight of his hot date speaking Spanish. Lucky for Wille, Maria was back to business,

“What’ll it be today boys?”

Simon graciously took the lead and orders them a variety of dishes he assures Wille he will love.

They wait patiently until their order is ready, Wille’s knee bouncing eagerly at the prospect of getting back to his place. As they are about to leave, Maria whispers not so subtly,

“He’s handsome Simon.”

Eliciting the most magnificent blush from Simon and coy smile from Wille. She continues,

“You two have a nice night.”

The tone was clear by the giggle that echoes in the restaurant as they step into the night air once again.

—

Wille anxiously fumbles for his keys, nervous and excited that they were finally here. Wille opens his door and allows Simon to purvey the space, taking off his shoes and jacket in the threshold before wandering into the living room. His date abandons their food on Wille’s kitchen island, slowly taking in Wille’s living room. Wille is grateful that he took the time to organize the space and officially decorate as Simon thoughtfully assesses his record collection. Wille watches Simon’s expressions as he reads each album cover. Curiosity piqued and feeling bold, Wille asks,

“See anything you like?”

Picking up on his flirtatious question, Simon smiles and responds with a low hum before finding Wille’s eyes. He can’t bear to break the stare, entranced by Simons ever-darkening eyes.

In a low, sexy tone, Simon responds,

“Yeah, I do” he says, scanning Wille up and down.

Wille can’t help the heat spreading from his chest to his cheeks at Simon’s comment. Simon looks like he is ready to devour him. Simon’s eyes gleaming, his plush pale brown lips wet with saliva as he holds Wille’s eye contact. Simon is a vision, unbelievably handsome, returning his wanting gaze.

Wille cant tolerate the space between them, crossing his living room to close the gap. He places a hand on the small of Simon’s back while he reaches around to take a look at the record Simon delicate finger rests on. Simon feels so warm under his fingertips and the proximity is delicious torture. Simon is magnetic and Wille is in no place to resist his pull.

Feigning nonchalance despite the buzzing butterflies erupting under his skin, Wille murmurs,

“Hmmm that is a good choice.”

against Simon’s neck.

He smiles at the goosebumps that emerge at his hot breath and whispered words. Unbridled satisfaction and yearning pool as Simon turns to face him.

The moment is drawn out as Simon stares into Wille’s eyes before leaning in to kiss him. The soft pressure of Simon’s lips on his own make him dizzy. The anticipation of it is nothing compared to the feeling as it plays out in front of him. Simon deepens their kiss, adding more pressure and lust to the gentle movement. Determined to kiss Simon the way he deserved to be, Wille reaches his hand up to cradle his cheek with a passion and tenderness that feels exclusive to them.

Wille can’t help but pull Simon closer, his other hand tightening around the man’s narrow waist, eliciting the most angelic noise from his date. Simon meets his passion, wrapping both arms around Wille’s neck, pulling them chest to chest. The pressure of their bodies against one another feels heavenly. Wille wants to learn every inch of the gorgeous man wrapped around his neck. He allows his hands to wander, grazing Simons back and shoulders as he pulls him impossibly closer.

Simon’s hands wander from Wille’s neck to his hair. The sensation of Simon so close, softly scratching his scalp and gently pulling his hair, ignites something deep. The heat and neediness make Wille groan. He can’t help the way Simon makes him feel.

Simon’s hands navigate down to Wille’s chest, pushing him back towards the couch where Wille sways as he aims to maintain his balance, a nearly impossible task given his state of mind. Understanding Simon’s intent, he allows himself to fall back into his couch and catch his breath momentarily.

Wille can’t help his giggle, chuckling at his own disheveled state while taking in the sight of Simon. His Simon. Eyes black with lust and lips large, now bitten pink.

Greedy for more, Wille breaks their silence,

“Come back. I want you close.”

Simon responds with a wide grin and glint of something unreadable as he approaches Wille.

Simon straddles him, answering Wille with a deep, desperate kiss. Wille eagerly meets his lips, returning the passion by pulling him closer. The feeling of Simon surrounding him was impossibly sexy. His warm, soft body. His eager hands. His large lips. His hardening erection pressing into his Wille’s abs. He wants Simon to consume him completely in this moment.

They fight for the lead, reciprocating each nip and bite as they happen. This strange dance was new to them both, but they quickly find a rhythm as they exchange sloppy, wet kisses. Wille notes each soft sound that escapes Simon’s lips between kisses, eager to replicate them over and over and over.

Wille is painfully aware of his own erection, pressing deliciously into Simon’s ass as he grinds down on them both. Equally eager, Simon tugs on Wille’s sweater and jeans, breaking their kiss to say,

“I want to feel your skin Wille. I want you.”

Desire eclipses all sense and Wille releases a guttural groan of delight,

“Please Simon”

Unable to contain his desperation, Wille continues,

“I want you too. I need you.”

Simon responds to Wille’s confession by rocking against his lap with a plea that captures exactly how Wille feels.

Determined, Wille rocks forward, leaning into Simon’s small frame before lifting him into the air. Simon clenches his legs around Wille’s waist as he carries him to the bedroom, lips connected the entire way, until Simon lets out a giggle and the most adorable groan,

“Fuck Wille, that was so hot.”

Pleased with himself, Wille sets Simon down on the edge of his bed. Eager, Wille allows his hands to linger on Simon’s waist where he held him just a moment ago, slipping them under the fabrics edge.

Kneeling before Simon, Wille makes eye contact,

“Is this okay Simon?”

Equally desperate, Simon responds,

“Pleassee Wille”

Wille lifts the fabric, revealing Simon’s sun kissed skin, glowing in the low light of his room. Wille notices Simon’s tattoo and makes a metal note to ask him about its significance another time. Wille takes in the sight, memorizing every inch of the man’s chest before placing the gentlest kiss where the ink remains.

Simon wakes Wille out of his reverie with a quiet question,

“May I?”

Gesturing to the sweater Simon was stoking between his thumb and forefinger.

Wille manages to nod in response, his smile too large to form proper words.

Simon places several barely there kisses on Wille’s chest and Wille allows himself to moan at the tantalizing, gentle touch. The anticipation is killing him.

Impatient, Wille pulls Simon up and connects their lips in a searing kiss. Hot and wet, all tongue and teeth with a passion that is increasingly difficult to ignore.

Fortunately, Simon matches Wille’s eagerness, unbuttoning his own pants before beckoning Wille to follow him as they make their way to his bed.

Wille pushes any self-conscious aside as he reveals his hard erection to Simon, walking towards the bed, unwilling to let his own thoughts sabotage this moment for them.

Simon looks devastatingly beautiful on the bed, waiting for him. He maintains eye contact with his beautiful date through this moment of vulnerability. Simon returns it with an intensity that makes him feel safe, warm, beautiful, desired, everything.

Ordinarily, his ‘date’ would already be getting dressed, calling an Uber after their quick shared release. Typically, sex was a means to an end; lacking intimacy that made pleasure something more. This feels different. It is different.

Wille likes Simon and he wants to show him in this moment. He wants to show him with his lips, his mouth, his hands, everything. He wants Simon to know how perfect he is.

Simon tucks a falling strand of Wille’s hair behind his ear, stroking his cheek in the process. The intimate gesture burns in his throat. Wille responds in the only way he can imagine; by placing a gentle kiss on Simon’s hand. They stay like this for a moment before their lips find one another yet again.

Wille lowers himself onto Simon and the pressure of their flush bodies feels heavenly. Seemingly in agreement, Simon ruts against Wille, reciprocating his needy kisses.

“Simon, what do you want?” Wille whispers, his hot breath against the other man’s ear.

Simon moans in response, words escaping him momentarily,

“I want you inside me Wille. I want you to fuck me.”

The statement sounds more like a plea and Wille is completely gone at the confession. He can’t help the way he groans in response, rutting against Simon as he manages,

“Fuck Simme. I want that too.”

White hot desire threatens to take over, but Wille forces himself to take it slow, enjoying this moment. Wille grabs Simon’s strong jaw, planting kisses down his neck with gentle passion. Wille continues his mission, leaving sloppy kisses as he works his way down Simon’s body; whispering sweet words as he goes, eager for Simon to know just how beautiful he is.

Wille makes sure to tease Simon, sucking on his hard nipples, before continuing his journey down his taut abdomen. Wille is rewarded with the most glorious moan from Simon; both men leaking pre-cum and involuntarily rutting against the other. Wille thinks he could cum untouched at the sound of Simon’s angelic moans.

Arriving at Simons tenting briefs, Wille hooks his fingers inside their elastic, waiting for Simon’s eye contact and nod of approval before shimmying the fabric down his body.

Simon is laid out for Wille, his throbbing erection leaking pre-cum onto his abdomen as Wille throws his underwear out of the way. Wille takes a moment to appreciate the sight in front of him.

Wille can’t help his smile. Simon looks like the sun and the moon and the stars; a whole galaxy.

“You look so beautiful Simon.”

Wille strokes his hands up and down the man’s exposed body. Wille holds eye contact with Simon as he lowers himself back onto the bed,

“I would like to put my mouth on you and open you up myself, is that okay?”

The look of shock and desire that flashes on Simon’s face emboldens him. Wille waits patiently while his lover forms words in response to his blunt request,

“Yes Wille, I need you.”

Wille can’t help his smile at the sound of Simon’s pleading.

Wille follows Simon’s happy trail, peppering it with kisses as he goes. Wille spreads his legs open for better access to all of Simon. Wille is smiling through his sloppy wet kisses as he adjusts his position; moving one hand underneath Simon’s ass and the other to the base of his leaking cock. With filthy care, Wille licks his hand before taking Simon in his hand.

The response is glorious, Simon arches his back and lets out a pent-up groan that goes straight to Wille’s groin.

Wille smiles at the response, stroking him painfully slow before adding his mouth to the mix.

Mouthwatering with longing, Wille indulges himself and takes Simon’s in; stroking his base as he swirls his tongue, salty pre-cum filling his senses. He worships Simon’s cock with careful attention, eager to please the beautiful man in his bed.

Wille feels Simon’s hands tangle in his hair, gently pulling in a way that makes Wille moan around Simon’s cock. God, Simon is so fucking hot.

Wille pops off his lover’s hard dick, continuing his torturously slow stroking while he kisses Simon’s hip,

“Can you do something for me, babe?”

“Anything.”

Wille can’t help but giggle at the speed with which Simon responds. It is endearing, vulnerable, and oh so sexy.

“I have lube in my beside table. Will you grab it and pass it to me?”

Propping himself up on his elbows, Simon retrieves the lube from his bedside table, handing it to Wille.

Wille removes his hand from Simon’s length to accept the bottle and Simon whines at the loss of contact. Wille can’t help to feel a little smug.

Wille puts a generous helping of lube on his fingers before assuming his position between Simon’s legs. He kisses Simon’s hips and thighs as he drags his lube-soaked fingers down Simon’s perineum to his perfect hole.

Simon’s voice echoes in the quiet room,

“Please Wille”

to which Wille responds with one long finger pushing past his hot entrance. Simon was deliciously tight, and the sound Simon produces at the intrusion makes Wille’s toes curl in pleasure. Wille slowly drags his fingers in and out, opening Simon up while kissing his thighs and hips senseless. Unwilling to rush Simon’s pleasure, Wille waits for Simon’s voice,

“More”

before adding a second finger. Wille presses a proper kiss to his hip as he adds a second finger to Simon’s tight hole. Simon begins rocking his hips to Wille’s rhythm, meeting him with each twist of his fingers. They are moving in sync and Wille is reveling in the sight of Simon coming apart.

Before long, Simon indicates that he is ready for a third finger. Wille happily obliges. The two are a moaning mess as they moved together.

Simon breaks their bubble of pleasure with a simple request,

“Wille, I want you inside me.”

Wille can’t help his own moan, eager to feel Simon around him. Wille gently removes his fingers, meanwhile Simon moves to flip onto all fours. Wille interrupts the movement,

“If it’s okay with you, I’d like to watch you when we’re fucking.”

Almost shy, despite his filthy request, Wille adds,

“I want you close.”

The look on Simon’s face is wonder and Wille is grateful he was brave enough to ask, as Simon pulls him in for a deep, passionate kiss,

Simon murmurs,
“I want that too.”

With ease, they shift into a comfortable position and Wille lines his aching cock up with Simon’s clenching entrance. Applying more lube, Wille gently pushes in, waiting for Simon to adjust before bottoming out.

Wille can barely contain his pleasure at the sensation. Simon feels so tight around him, despite their drawn-out foreplay. Wille feels every twitch, every movement, every adjustment as Simon surrounds him. It is purse bliss.

As the two adjust to their new connection, Simon pulls Wille closer, wrapping his legs around the man’s waist before whispering,

“You feel so good Wille.”

They stay like this until Simon’s movement prompts next steps. Exchanging desperate and affirming nods, Wille set the pace, thrusting into Simon; slow at first before picking up his speed. Wille’s cock fills Simon completely, hitting that perfect spot deep in his core that makes the man clench around him. They hold one another impossibly close, while they chase pleasure together.

Simon’s own cock remains untouched between the two. Wille’s steady pace aligns with Simon’s thrusts, both growing more erratic as they near orgasm.

Between moans and the soft slapping of their bodies together, Simon manages,

“I want you to come for me Wille.”

Simon’s hot breath on his neck, asking him to come was the hottest thing he has ever heard. The simple request puts him over the edge, free falling towards the most intense orgasm he’s ever had.

“Fuck Simme, fuck fuck fuck”

Wille feels Simon shoot his seed between the two of them. Their respective orgasms take over and both men let out loud moans. Simon’s face is frozen in pleasure while Wille’s seed spills deep inside his lover. Wille collapses onto Simon’s body, and he pulls the man close as both their bodies twitch in pleasure. Simon leaves gentle kisses on his neck and in that moment, Wille feels complete; whole.

After what feels like an eternity; after the most earth-shattering orgasm, Wille emerges from the crook of Simon’s neck and plants a gentle kiss on Simon’s lips. Simon holds his eye contact, bringing his hands to Wille’s cheeks in a sweet embrace before pulling him in for a hug. Shifting his weight to pull out, Simon interrupts Wille,

“Not yet, Wille. I want you to stay for another moment, if that’s okay.”

Simon blushes and Wille beams; a wide, toothy grin before relaxing into the other man.

Wille murmurs,

“Of course.”

He isn’t sure how long they stay connected; exchanging soft, lazy kisses in his sweat stained sheets but Wille treasures the intimacy of this moment… the bliss that is Simon.

Chapter Text

Simon’s stomach interrupts their post-coital bliss with a series of loud grumbles. Reluctant to acknowledge them, not wanting to emerge from their cocoon, Wille does the honor for them both.

Hot breath on his neck, Wille murmurs,

“It sounds like someone is hungry.”

Wille is drawing circles on his back and arms as they lay together. Simon responds, barely above a whisper,

“I’d rather eat something else.”

Although the innuendo lands beautifully, eliciting a quiet chuckle from Wille, he continues,

“…but maybe we should clean up and eat something first?”

“Hmm, that sounds wonderful.”

Wille slips out of Simon, leaving him clenching around nothing, already missing Wille inside of him. He whines at the sensation, the loss. Pouting, Simon adjusts his position while Wille rises from the bed.

The men exchange a sweet smile before Wille offers,

“I am just going to grab a washcloth quick. I’ll be right back.”

Simon does as he is told, propping himself up on his elbows, taking inventory of the mess they just made. Simon’s cum is smeared on his chest and abdomen. Red marks linger litter his hips and waist. He hopes they turn to bruises but knows it’s too early to tell. He loves when lovers mark him up. It always makes him feel so desired, so sexy.

Wille interrupts his train of thought, extending a warm washcloth into his field of vision. Wille sits on the edge of the bed before asking,

“May I?”

gesturing to Simon’s messy mid-section. Simon nods, slightly breathless once again, as he watches Wille ever so gently clean him up. The sight is intimate and painfully romantic. The tenderness with which Wille cares for him in this moment feels telling of his character.

Simon is emotional, he can’t help it. The culmination of the night; the date, the sex, the aftercare. It all feels good, nearly too good. His thoughts threaten to derail him, suggesting that he doesn’t deserve this. His internal storm must be obvious on his face as Wille quietly asks,

“Is everything okay?”

The genuine concern in his voice challenges the tears threatening to spill over. Simon uses every morsel of self-control to take a deep, regulating breath before sharing his dark thoughts. In an impossibly small voice, Simon admits,

“I just feel like…I don’t deserve this.”

He can hear Wille sigh, letting out a deep breath as he shifts his position in front of Simon and searches his emotional eyes, setting down the washcloth on his side table in the process. Simon won’t give him a moment to respond, instead, continuing his train of thought out loud in a moment of unfiltered vulnerability,

“I just feel like I don’t deserve to feel this happy. Like, fuck! Wille, this was the best sex of my life. I have never felt so turned on and also cared for at the same time. You are handsome and funny and smart and brave and gentle and sexy and interesting. You say what you want. You are vulnerable, even when it’s hard. I can see all of this after only two days of knowing you. And now I’m sitting in your bed after the best sex of my life on the verge of tears because I don’t feel good enough. I don’t feel like I deserve warm washcloths and my favorite takeout and…”

Simon sighs, meeting Wille’s searching eyes before collapsing his head into his hands.

“Hey, hey, hey Simon. Babe, look at me.”

Babe.

Wille gently places his hands on the inside of Simon’s forearms, following it up to his hands that are serving as a safe haven after his vulnerable confession. Wille’s soft touch is persistent, and Simon can’t avoid it any longer. He raises his head out of his hands to meet Wille’s gaze. They take a deep breath together before Wille continues,

“I am sorry if anyone has ever made you feel like you deserve any less than this. Simon, you are authentic and smart and funny and resilient and talented and loyal and brave and so fucking attractive it makes me go cross eyed. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since I literally ran into you yesterday. I mean, for fucks sake, this is embarrassing, but I called my best friend to tell her about you because I like you so much. And…”

This catches Simon’s attention, and he returns Wille’s gaze with a glint of hope in his eyes,

“Really?”

“Really, really. Simon, I know that we have a lot to learn about one another but that’s the beauty of it. I’ve had more fun tonight than I’ve had in years and it has nothing to do with the sex. Although to be clear the sex was fucking out of this world good, easily the best orgasm of my life…”

Simon smirks at Wille, the spell of sadness broken with his reciprocated vulnerability. He nods in response, listening attentively, determined to believe the sweet man in front of him and ignore the devil on his shoulder.

Wille continues his long-winded profession,

“…but that’s beside the point. Even if we hadn’t had sex Simon, this would be the best date I’ve ever been on, and that is simply because of you.”

Simon’s intrusive thoughts quiet with Wille’s affirming words. In his heart of hearts, Simon knows that he deserves good things but sometimes his insecurities rear their ugly head, and at the most in opportune times. If it was anyone else, he wouldn’t dare share such insecurities. But in the same breath, if it was anyone else, he wouldn’t be emotional because he would already be home after a quick, meaningless meh fuck; not being cared for by the gentlest man he’s ever met.

Physically exhausted, emotionally drained, and borderline starving, Simon gathers the courage to respond to Wille’s sweet words, hopeful to move on from this without permanently damaging whatever is blooming between them.

Simon covers Wille’s hand, face to face with his sincere amber eyes, and pulls him into the gentlest kiss he can muster. Simon separates their lips, foreheads touching as they breathe the same air.

“I am so sorry Wille. I’m a mess. I swear to God, I don’t usually have a full-on emotional breakdown after every date.”

Simon can feel Wille’s smile as his forehead crinkles beneath him,

“So, you’re saying I’m special?”

Wille’s joke disintegrates any remaining tension, and Simon can’t help the booming laughter that escapes between them. Wille joins in and it takes several minutes for them to calm down enough to speak again.

Wille raises an eyebrow and extends his hand to Simon,

“Let’s take a quick shower to properly clean off and then we can snuggle up to actually watch the movie with our food. How does that sound?”

Simon lets out an exaggerated sigh,

“That sounds perfect Wille.”

He stands, accepting Wille’s hand before pulling him into a messy hug. Simon mutters,

“Seriously, thank you so much for everything.”

Wille’s chest is warm, and his strong arms wrap around Simon, reciprocating the gesture, he places a kiss on his messy curls.

Simon’s stomach grumbles again, forcing them to separate and continue towards the shower.

-

Simon curls up on Wille’s couch, swimming in Wille’s too large sweatpants and sweatshirt as his date fiddles with the tv remote to skip through the commercials before arriving at the movie menu. Their takeout is spread out on the coffee table and Simon is plating servings for them both.

Before the movie begins, Simon explains, with probably too much detail, what each dish is. He is so excited to share this little piece of his culture with someone so eager to learn. Wille focuses on Simon’s descriptions with an intensity that is absolutely adorable. The way his eyes squint and his lips pucker in concentration is ridiculously cute. He can’t help his smile as Wille tentatively tastes each dish of his home country, giving affirming head nods as he goes.

“Holy shit Simon this one is like, super spicy.”

Wille’s mouth hangs open, half chewed food on his tongue as he fans it in an effort to cool his senses. Wille huffs some more, with theatrics as silly as they are adorable.

“Wille honey, if you think that is spicy, I’d avoid the food at your 6 and 9 o clock as well.”

Simon is smiling ear to ear, giving a warning look as he tries to control his laughter.

With a humorously desperate look on Wille’s face, Simon sets his own plate down and walks to the kitchen. He opens one cabinet at a time until he finds the cupboard with glasses, opening the refrigerator in search of a beverage to cool his lover’s senses.

“Wille, what on earth do you eat?”

Simon scans the shelves and drawers for milk or juice to provide Wille some relief, but he has no such luck.

He pours Wille a glass of water and brings it to his aid before continuing his reprimand,

“I mean seriously Wille. Your fridge is barren. Like Saharan desert barren. What do you eat?”

Simon laughs at his own question, curious for the answer but mainly interested in gently teasing his handsome lover who seemingly always has it together.

Wille takes several long, exaggerated sips of the water before recovering enough to respond to Simon’s teasing.

“First off…”

Wille begins, finger pointing to the air to reinforce his seriousness before collapsing in a fit of giggles.

“I don’t have any excuses. Honestly, I’m a shit cook so I usually end up getting take away or pre-made meals.”

Simon gasps in horror, theatrics in full effect as he pretends to be shocked.

“Well, we found his Achilles heel folks. Pretty boy Wille doesn’t know how to cook.”

Simon playfully nudges Wille’s shoulder, closing the space between them as he scoots between Wille’s crossed legs.

He moves his hand from his shoulder to his neck, idly stroking the space under his ear and over his pulse point; leaning into whisper,

“Luckily for you, Wille, I am an excellent cook.”

Simon leans in and places the gentlest kiss on Wille’s red hot lips.

“Lucky for me indeed.”

Wille responds, echoing the words that Simon said to him several hours ago at the bar.

Simon reciprocates Wille’s smile, leaning back to his own couch cushion.

Wille’s face contorts into a giddy smirk as he conceals his own laughter,

“So, you think I’m pretty, huh?”

Simon can’t contain his laughter. He lets the levity wrack through his body, throwing his head back at the quick-witted whip. The laughter is cathartic. Another release he desperately needs, at the hands of Wille.

Wille is smiling at the sight. A big, toothy grin.

Wille continues eating tentatively, looking to Simon before trying each dish to gauge the level of spice he should expect. They play this game back and forth until they are full and happy.

Simon buses their nearly clean plates and stores the remaining leftovers in Wille’s barren fridge before settling back onto the couch.

Wille looks like a real-life golden retriever, eagerly cradling the remote and patting the cushion next to him. Simon settles into the couch, adjusting his position, motioning for Wille to lean against him.

“Come here, pretty boy.”

Wille complies, not without a chuckle and eye roll. Although Wille is taller and large then Simon, he snuggles into the space Simon carves out for him with ease. Simon places a decorative pillow on his chest so Wille can properly lay down. Simon covers them with the ornate and colorful blanket on the back of the couch and Wille presses play on the movie.

Simon holds Wille, running his hands through his freshly washed hair, massaging his scalp the way his mother used to when he was a child. He continues this idle motion as he watches the opening scene of their movie; smiling at the 90’s nostalgia and distant of version Seattle that feels more like a memory.

-

Forever the night owl, Simon is wide awake and engaged in the cheesy storyline meanwhile Wille’s soft snoring suggests he is an early bird.

He listens to the sound of Willes quiet breathing, beautiful background music. He wants to record it and use it as the background to a song. The sound is so gentle and beautiful. Distracted at the thought, he writes a chorus in his head;

🎶 I am watching your even breath

🎶 The rise and fall of your chest

🎶 The cross around your neck

🎶 Hmmm you are

🎶 You are my favorite lullaby

🎶 You are

The film ends as he would expect, and he allows the credits to roll before he wakes Wille. Reluctant to disturb his peace but eager to stretch his legs.

Simon resumes playing with Wille’s hair while quietly cooing,

“Wille”

Sound asleep, Simon leans in closer to Wille’s ear and gently repeats his name.

Wille’s eyes flutter and his sleep heavy eyes open carefully. Disoriented and vulnerable, he relaxes at Simon’s soothing coos. A smile emerging as the moment catches up to him.

“How long have I been out?”

Simon pretends to ponder the question before responding,

“I’d say you made it through the first 10 minutes. That’s when the snoring started anyway.”

Simon couldn’t help his smile.

Wille buries his face in Simon’s chest, letting out a groan.

“Ugh how embarrassing!”

“It’s okay, Wille. I thought it was cute.”

Wille scoffs but Simon can see his lips twitch into a smile as he emerges from his cacoon. Simon double taps his shoulder and shifts in his seat,

“Let’s get you to bed.”

Without skipping a beat, Wille responds,

“Only if you’ll join me.”

Simon is perpetually impressed by Wille’s wit. He is so quick and extraordinarily charming.

“Please? Stay the night, Simon?”

Already so gone for this man, Simon agrees,

“Absolut, Wille”

Chapter Text

Wille is unclear how long they’ve been intertwined. Simon’s stomach growling is what finally gives him the courage to separate. Reluctant to do so but contentious of his partner’s needs, Wille murmurs,

“It sounds like someone is hungry.”

Wille remains content, drawing invisible circles on Simon’s back and arms as he awaits a response.

“I’d rather eat something else.”

Wille can’t help the chuckle that shakes them both at Simon’s dirty joke. He loves that they felt comfortable enough to joke around with one another in such a vulnerable moment.

Simon continues,

“…but maybe we should clean up and eat something first?”

Wille agrees,

“Hmm, that sounds wonderful.”

Wille slips out of Simon, focused on his next task as he strides to the bathroom to retrieve a warm cloth for the both of them.

Wille can’t help his smile as he retreats. Simon is beautifully wrecked, at his doing, laid out on his bed in a way that makes heat pool at his navel.

Wille waits as the water warms, looking at himself in his bathroom mirror. His hair is a mess and cheeks flush. He notices love bites on his neck, tracing his hand over the same spot that Simon pressed with reverences earlier in the evening. He shakes off his goofy smile as he wets the washcloth and returns to his bedroom.

Wille sits on the edge of the bed, extending the warm washcloth before asking,

“May I?”

gesturing to Simon’s messy mid-section. Simon nods in response and Wille begins cleaning with care. Moments like these are Wille’s favorite. Forever the romantic, he treasures the intimate moments with a lover outside of their fits of passion. He craves the tender touches that come with this type of vulnerability.

Lost in his gratitude, Wille returns to the moment as he senses a shift in Simon. He worries out loud,

“Is everything okay?”

Wille watches emotion filter through Simon’s deep, dark eyes. He senses the heaviness of his own emotions and waits patiently for a response.

“I just feel like…I don’t deserve this.”

The words shatter Wille’s sensitive heart, and an ache threatens tears as he process’ the man’s confession.

A million thoughts and questions circulate through his mind as he takes a grounding breath, but Simon interrupts them with an increasingly vulnerable explanation,

“I just feel like I don’t deserve to feel this happy. Like, fuck! Wille, this was the best sex of my life. I have never felt so turned on and also cared for at the same time. You are handsome and funny and smart and brave and gentle and sexy and interesting. You say what you want. You are vulnerable, even when it’s hard. I can see all of this after only two days of knowing you. And now I’m sitting in your bed after the best sex of my life on the verge of tears because I don’t feel good enough. I don’t feel like I deserve warm washcloths and my favorite takeout and…”

Simon hangs his head in his hands and Wille cannot bear to see Simon’s distress. Wille takes Simon’s momentary pause as an opportunity to interject,

“Hey, hey, hey Simon. Babe, look at me.”

Wille needs to see Simon’s eyes. He needs to look into those earnest, dark chocolate pools as he responds to this dark admission.

Persistent, Wille gently places his hand on the inside of Simon’s forearm, following it up to his hands, eager to draw him out of his safe haven. He doesn’t want Simon to hide. He needs Simon to know that he is always safe with Wille. Once Simon’s tear brimmed eyes meets his own, they share a deep breath before Wille continues,

“I am sorry if anyone has ever made you feel like you deserve any less than this. Simon, you are authentic and smart and funny and resilient and talented and loyal and brave and so fucking attractive it makes me go cross eyed. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since I literally ran into you yesterday. I mean, for fucks sake, this is embarrassing, but I called my best friend to tell her about you because I like you so much. And…”

This admission catches Simon’s attention, much to Willes delight. He wants, no, he needs Simon to understand the magnitude of his own feelings. He needs Simon to know that he deserves this and so much more.

Wille can hear the hope in Simon’s voice as he responds,

“Really?”

“Really, really. Simon, I know that we have a lot to learn about one another but that’s the beauty of it. I’ve had more fun tonight than I’ve had in years and it has nothing to do with the sex. Although to be clear the sex was fucking out of this world good, easily the best orgasm of my life…”

Wille is determined to reassure Simon even if it comes at the expense of his own delusional vulnerability. Fortunately, Simon’s lips quirk into a smirk at the statement and he feels the heavy weight of the conversation start to lift.

Wille continues his long-winded profession, renewed at the signs of life as his lover listens intently,

“…but that’s beside the point. Even if we hadn’t had sex Simon, this would be the best date I’ve ever been on, and that is simply because of you.”

Wille drives the point home. He knows that his own confession cannot heal Simon’s underlying insecurities, but he needs it to reassure him in this moment and remind him of what he deserves. Wille wants to give him everything he deserves and more. But more than that, he wants to remind Simon of his own inherent worth and value.

Wille waits with bated breath as Simon covers Wille’s hand with his own and pulls him into a barely there kiss. Their foreheads remain connected as they breath one another’s expired air.

Simon’s voice is stronger now,

“I am so sorry Wille. I’m a mess. I swear to God, I don’t usually have a full-on emotional breakdown after every date.”

Wille can’t help but chuckle at Simon’s words,

“So, you’re saying I’m special?”

They both erupt in laughter as any remaining tension disintegrates around them. Wille takes a deep breath as he extends his hand to Simon,

“Let’s take a quick shower to properly clean off and then we can snuggle up to actually watch the movie with our food. How does that sound?”

Wille is rewarded with an exaggerated sigh and smile form Simon,

“That sounds perfect Wille.”

Simon rises from his spot on the bed, accepting Wille’s hand before pulling him into a messy hug. Wille reciprocates it with enthusiasm, pulling Simon close as he places a kiss to his curly crown. Simon murmurs against his chest,

“Seriously, thank you so much for everything.”

Simon’s stomach grumbles again, forcing them to separate and continue towards the shower.

-

Their shower is innocent enough, exchanging soapy touches and sappy smiles as they clean one another. Wille is delighted to offer Simon his clothes to wear and can’t help but smile at the sight. Both his sweatpants and sweatshirt are entirely too big, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Simon looked incredible earlier; sexy and confident in his date night outfit but this is quickly becoming his favorite version of Simon, relaxed and natural.

Simon makes himself cozy on the couch, plating their forgotten take-out while Wille navigates the ancient DVD menu, fast forwarding through commercials advertising movies from before he was born.

Nearly ready, Simon reviews, in detail, the variations of Venezuelan cuisine they were eating. Simon’s energy and pride are obvious, and it makes Wille’s heart swell. He listens attentively at his adorable date until it is time to dig in.

“Holy shit Simon this one is like, super spicy.”

Manners evade him, mouth wide open, full of half chewed food as he frantically fans himself, processing the heat of the dish. Clearly a sight for sore eyes, Wille embraces his own theatrics, registering that Simon is chuckling at his embarrassing outburst.

“Wille honey, if you think that is spicy, I’d avoid the food at your 6 and 9 o clock as well.”

Honey.

Wille watches as Simon riffles through his kitchen, opening cupboards with a confident casualness that makes him smile. Mouth still on fire, he sits in quiet observation as Simon searches for a drinking glass and beverage to pair with it. Opening the fridge, Wille hears a chuckle followed by,

“Wille, what on earth do you eat?”

Defeated by the non-existent selection, Simon pours a glass of water and brings it to Wille before continuing his reprimand,

“I mean seriously Wille. Your fridge is barren. Like Saharan desert barren. What do you eat?”

Wille basks in Simon’s sweet chuckle as he downs several gulps of water in a weak attempt to dampen the heat.

Satisfied at his ability to speak without breathing fire, Wille responds with a stern finger, ready to defend his own ineptitude.

“First off…”

He only gets the first couple of words out before falling into a fit of giggles. His facade is broken, and he continues in honesty,

“I don’t have any excuses. Honestly, I’m a shit cook so I usually end up getting take away or pre-made meals.”

His confession is rewarded with a theatrical gasp from Simon,

“Well, we found his Achilles heel, folks. Pretty boy Wille doesn’t know how to cook.”

Wille responds with a bashful smile at the retort. Simon playfully nudges his shoulder, closing the space between them as he scoots between Wille’s crossed legs.

Simon moves his hand from his shoulder to his neck, idly stroking the space under his ear and over his pulse point before leaning into whisper,

“Luckily for you, Wille, I am an excellent cook.”

Simon places the gentlest kiss on Wille’s burning lips and he sees stars. This man was going to be the death of him. Remembering their conversation earlier, Wille can’t help but use Simon’s own words against him,

“Lucky for me indeed.”

They share an understanding smile at the shared memory as Simon leans back to his spot on the couch.

Feeling bold, Wille continues the banter,

“So, you think I’m pretty, huh?”

He watches Simon’s head roll back in a belly laughter that makes his insides melt. Wille takes in the sight with shared delight, unable to contain his smile, laughing at his own joke.

Finally recovered from his near-death experience with the insanely hot dish at his 1 o’clock, Wille eats tentatively, looking to Simon before trying each food to gauge the level of spice he should expect. They find a rhythm in this unspoken game until they are both full.

Simon buses their nearly clean plates and stores the remaining leftovers in Wille’s barren fridge before settling back onto the couch.

Wille can’t contain his excitement, although fatigue gnaws at his early bird brain. Simon returns to his spot on the couch, adjusting his position before motioning for Wille to lean against him.

“Come here, pretty boy.”

Wille can’t help his chuckle at the silly nickname but complies, eager to snuggle into his handsome lover. Despite his height and size, Wille loves being the little spoon, quickly adjusting his position so he fits perfectly in Simon’s small frame. He rests his head on a thoughtfully placed decorative pillow and lets himself relax completely at the sound of Simon’s quiet heartbeat and even breath.

He presses play on the remote control before allowing Simon’s comforting presence to surround him completely. He feels Simon’s delicate hands wander into his hair, scratching his scalp and tickling his neck in the most delightful way.

-

“Wille”

Dazed and only slightly confused, Wille emerges from his sleepy state, hearing his name in the distance, as if he is underwater. The voice persists, soothing and velvety,

“Wille”

Just like this morning, Wille wakes up slowly and then all at once. He feels Simon’s soothing touch and registers his sweet face, beckoning him from his slumber and pulling him back to reality.

“How long have I been out?”

Simon pretends to ponder the question before responding,

“I’d say you made it through the first 10 minutes. That’s when the snoring started anyway.”

Simon was smiling, bright and teasing,

Oh my gosh, how embarrassing! Wille buries his face in Simon’s chest, letting out a groan at the realization of his own party foul.

“Ugh how embarrassing!”

Simon’s cheeks flush and he puts Wille out of his misery with sweet reassurance,

“It’s okay, Wille. I thought it was cute.”

Wille can’t help the scoff at such a suggestion. As if!

Simon double taps his shoulder and shifts in his seat,

“Let’s get you to bed.”

Simon was being so gentle and thoughtful. Determined to extend the night as long as he can, Wille responds,

“Only if you’ll join me.”

Wille gives him a moment to ponder before insisting further,

“Please? Stay the night, Simon?”

Wille doesn’t care if he sounds desperate. He wants Simon in every way he can imagine, starting now. After what feels like ages, Simon responds with a playful smile and affirming nod,

“Absolut, Wille”

Chapter Text

Simon wakes to the soft sound of footsteps through the apartment and raindrops on the window. The sound is one of his favorite songs of nature. The repetition of it is so soothing. He stretches under the covers, opening his eyes slightly to brave the day.

It takes Simon a moment to orient himself to the surroundings, to remember that he is in Wille’s bed, alone, although it sounds like he is up and moving about. His phone is somewhere in Wille’s living room so he can’t tell the time. The dark, ominous skies give no indication either.

Simon sits up, taking in the room as he emerges from his cozy cocoon. He didn’t have much time to take in the surroundings last night, too distracted by his date.

Wille’s bedroom is simple and tasteful. Simon can see the Swedish influence interwoven with Wille’s eclectic style. The art is cheeky and colorful, pop art reminiscent. He has a ribbon of red neon lights on his dresser, highlighting several small ceramic bowls housing his jewelry; chains, watches, and rings. His book collection is impressive, second only to his notebook collection. Simon smiles at the stacks, remembering their first encounter where he knocked them all over Garfield’s main entrance when they met.

Simon slept so so well. Exchanging cuddles and gentle touches back and forth. Their bodies didn’t have to find one another because they never left. Wille’s warmth radiates off of him, which is perfect because Simon is always cold. Smiling at the memories of the last twenty-four hours, Simon is motivated to wake up and find Wille.

Wiping the sleep from his eyes, he wanders towards the living room, desperate for coffee. Wille is stretching in the middle of his living room floor, soaking wet. Simon can hear the base of whatever song Wille is listening to, aware that his AirPods are hiding behind his sopping wet mop and a backwards ball cap. He murmurs along to what sounds like a hip-hop track but he can’t tell. Simon allows himself a moment to appreciate the sight, marveling at the man in front of him while chuckling at the absurdity of it all.

The series of stretches appear to be a practiced routine, Wille goes through the motions fluidly. He crosses his right leg over his outstretched left leg and twists like a pretzel, finally meeting Simon’s lingering gaze. Too loud for the quiet of the apartment, Wille starts,

“How long have you been standing there?”

before taking out an AirPod and realizing he is nearly shouting. Simon gives a casual shrug with a smile in response,

“Long enough to know that your right side is tighter than your left and you only say like half of the lyrics when you’re rapping.”

Wille blushes bright but recovers with wit,

“So, you’re saying I should stick to writing?”

His toothy grin is on full display as the words leave his mouth.

“I’d have to read your work before committing to such a statement, but it’s looking that way Wille.”

Simon reciprocates the smile, approaching the man before sitting down next to him.

“What were you doing anyway? Like, why are you soaking wet?”

“I went for a run.”

“On purpose? Outside?” Simon replies, half joking half serious.

This elicits a laugh from Wille.

“Yeah, on purpose.”

Wille flashes a wicked grin,

“How do you think I maintain this pretty boy physique?”

Simon cackles at Wille’s suggestive shoulder movement,

“Hmmm… I can think of a few ways”

Simon uses his most sultry morning voice as he wiggles his eyebrows.

The air stills between them, with only electricity present. The lust is palpable, and Simon can only hope Wille feels the same way. Sex is amazing any time of the day, but morning sex is Simon’s favorite. It can be leisurely or desperate, quick or drawn out, sensual or dirty but no matter what it always has an heir of vulnerability.

Before he can process what is happening, Wille crashes into him with a fierce kiss. Simon’s senses are overwhelmed as Wille pushes him onto his back, his soaking wet body covering Simon in a blanket of rainwater and sweat. Simon knocks off Wille’s ball cap as he runs his fingers through his hair, grabbing his slippery, silky strands to pull him closer. Wille groans at the sensation, rolling his hips into Simon’s. He can’t help the whine he lets out at the sensation.

Wille looks hot, all wet and sweaty. He is so on board with this. Simon moves his hands over Wille’s shoulders and back, looking for something to grab, to no avail. It’s all stuck to his damp skin. Simon settles on the waistband of Wille’s joggers, slipping his fingers in to grab a handful of fabric; pulling him close, chasing friction. Simon can feel Wille’s length against his leg, hard already and as desperate as Simon feels.

Simon rolls them, pressing Wille into his living room rug, eager to have the upper hand. Simon feels Wille’s hands on his waist as he deepens their kiss and realizes his opportunity. Simon gently grabs Wille’s wrists, interlocking their fingers before dragging his arms over head. Simon holds him in place while he slips his tongue into mouth, laying his body weight on Wille, kissing him with filthy passion while their hips move in tandem. He feels Wille writhe in response, groaning in delight at the change in their power dynamic. Simon slips his leg between Wille’s, pressing harder into his erection, teasing him with a renewed vigor. He moves his kisses from Wille’s mouth to his jaw, down his neck. Simon is leaving a sloppy trail, tasting the salt on his skin as he goes. Wille moans,

“Fuck Simon, you’re so hot.”

Simon can feel Wille’s throbbing cock twitching against his hip.

“You like when I take control, Wille?”

Simon murmurs the question against his neck while he finds the hem of his sticky shirt, pushing the wet fabric up before moving his lips to Wille’s chest.

Simon’s own cock is neglected, throbbing in Wille’s sweatpants, but he doesn’t care. He needs to make Wille feel as good as he did last night. He kisses each freckle reverently, teasing his nipples with his tongue before moving down towards his waist band. Simon can’t help himself; he palms Wille’s cock through his pants, eliciting the most gorgeous groan from his lover while he continues his path down his body.

Simon is in between Wille’s legs now, hands moving down his body. Wille’s hands remain over his head where Simon left them.

The view is majestic. So fucking sexy. Wille is panting, writhing under his touch. He can’t help himself, so he puts his mouth on his bulge, over his pants. Kissing the fabric greedily.

Simon chances a glance up, eyes meeting Wille’s who are pleading,

“Simon, I want you.”

His voice is thick with lust and desperation,

“ I want you to fuck me.”

Simon can’t help his own smile at Wille’s request. He wants nothing more.

He wants to feel every inch of Wille around him. He wants to be the reason Wille unravels in bliss. He wants to push him over the edge and make him feel like the only object of his desire.

Simon takes his mouth off of Wille’s, long enough to ask,

“Do you want me to fuck you here on the floor, or would you like to go to the bedroom?”

Wille moans Simon’s name,

“I want you here, now.”

The demand sounds more like a plea and Simon can’t help the sound he makes in response. Wille makes him feral.

“May I?”

Simon asks, gently tugging on Wille’s pants.

“Please, Simon”

Simon lifts off of Wille, crawling up his body to place several sloppy kisses on his neck before reaching under his waist band.

“You’ll have to be patient for me, babe. I need to make sure you’re ready for me.”

Simon takes Wille in his hand, stroking him slowly, breaking only to brush his thumb over his tip, until Wille is writhing underneath him.

“I’m going to need to grab some lube and then I would like to open you up if that’s okay?”

Simon keeps his voice steady, calm, despite his internal eagerness.

Wille whines in response. Simon allows himself a glance at his lover as he pads towards Wille’s bedroom to retrieve the lube. Wille’s eyes are heavy with lust, pupils blown as he lays sprawled on the floor. He is a mess. A beautiful, pining, hot mess.

Once he retrieves the lube, he returns to Wille gently palming himself in wait. Simon resumes his position at Wille’s waist and carefully removes his pants. He lets his touch linger on every muscle as he drags the soaking wet joggers down his legs, freeing Wille’s erection in the process. Simon should have known he was a runner. He has the most beautiful, strong legs.

“If it’s okay with you, I’d like to take over touching you while I open you up.”

Wille nods vehemently in response, eyebrows twisted together in pleasure at the anticipation.

Simon resumes his position at Wille’s groin, draping his arm over his right leg, assuming responsibility for Wille’s aching cock, while he uses his dominant hand to move Wille’s left leg out to the side, exposing his hole to Simon.

The sight is beautiful. Wille’s noises reverberate off the walls of his small apartment while Simon squeezes lube on his perineum.

Determined to draw out the torture, Simon traces his fingers slowly through Wille’s pubic hair, down to where Wille needs him most. Wille’s breath shutters and Simon feels his large hand squeeze his forearm.

“Please, Simon”

With a wicked grin, Simon obliges.

Simon slips one slick finger into Wille’s entrance, allowing him to relax around him before advancing further, moving deliciously slow. He revels in the drawn-out moan that Wille produces as Simon works him open, adding another finger after a couple minutes of gorgeous noises. Simon is acutely aware of each twitch and twist of pleasure; the sensation of Wille’s hips snapping up to meet his fingers, when his fingers hit that perfect spot deep in his core.

“Simonnn”

Wille draws out the last syllable and Simon melts at the sound. His name on Wille’s tongue.

“Please, Simon, I need you.”

Assured that Wille is ready, Simon returns to his own neglected cock. He smears fresh lube from his base all the way up to his leaking tip. He meets Wille’s lust filled stare with equal intensity, desperate to give him exactly what he needs. Simon holds eye contact with Wille as he teases his cock into Wille’s tight hole. He feels Wille squeeze around him, and the sensation is blinding. Overwhelming.

Simon can’t ignore his own desire anymore. He uses every last ounce of self-control to check in with Wille before fucking him proper. Fucking him like Wille needs.

Wille’s long legs wrap around his waist and Simon closes the gap between them. Their chests are nearly flush with sweat pooling and Wille’s erection rubbing against their stomachs.

Simon closes the gap completely, shifting his weight to kiss Wille, gentle at first but increasingly desperate as their bodies move together. Simon moves his arms down Wille’s neck and shoulders, grabbing onto his wrists again, pinning them above his head as he thrusts into him. There is barely any space between them as Simon allows his body to consume Wille’s, greedy and wanting. Wille’s cries of passion only encourage him further. Wille needs him and Simon is determined to give him everything he asked for; every kiss, every touch, every thrust, everything.

Simon steadies his voice,

“You look so pretty like this, Wille. Taking me so well.”

Simon is rewarded with a gorgeous groan as Wille bucks his hips up to meet every deep thrust. They are working in tandem, chasing orgasms together.

Simon can feel his climax building. The wave of pleasure rising so fast that he isn’t sure how much longer he can hold it off. He adjusts his position, allowing his entire body to blanket Wille’s, desperate that the added pressure will bring Wille over the edge with him.

Simon nibbles Wille’s ear before softly whispering,

“Let go for me, Wille. Come for me.”

Simon feels Wille’s climax before he hears it. Wille’s tight hole contracts around him, squeezing Simon in that delicious way that sends him over the edge. They crash together, erratic thrusts that become full body shutters as they spill their seed in sync. Wille’s voice is background music to his own chorus.

Simon can’t help himself as he shouts Wille’s name over and over again; a song, a chorus, a chant, an answered prayer.

Simon releases control, sliding his hands back down Wille’s arms, wrapping them around his waist. He holds Wille tight as they share labored breath and gentle quivers, coming down from their shared bliss.

Simon feels Wille’s weight shift as the man reciprocates his hug, placing gentle kisses on his neck and shoulders while they lie intertwined. Goosebumps litter their skin as the sweat dries and their breathing returns to normal.

Wille is the first to break the silence,

“Simon that was…”

Simon raises his head from its safe space to meet Wille’s eyes and gauge his reaction. Fortunately, Wille doesn’t give him any time to second guess himself.

“…so fucking hot. Holy shit, I mean that was insane. Single handedly the best sex I’ve ever had. Like… oh my god I feel like I’m seeing color for the first time.”

Simon can’t contain the cheeky grin that spreads ear to ear.

“So, you feel it too?”

It’s never felt like this with anyone else.

The two share a content sigh; exchanging a knowing glance and lazy kiss before they make moves to the shower.

“Shall we get you cleaned up, pretty boy?”

Simon smirks at Wille, shooting him a wink at their new inside joke.

“I don’t know, I think I really like dirty Simon.”

Simon lets out a guttural laugh at Wille’s cheesy joke, tickling his sides in retaliation.

They go back and forth in a tickle fight until Wille reluctantly surrenders, waving his discarded ball cap in the air in lieu of a white flag.

Simon extends a hand, pulling Wille towards the shower.

“Come on, I want to take care of you, Wille.”

***

With an old Kota album playing on vinyl in the background, Simon washes Wille’s hair; massaging his scalp leisurely, using the pads of his fingers and nails equally. Wille hums with the background music as he allows his head to fall back into Simons hands. Simon loves the vulnerability of a shared shower. It feels so important to be able to nurture one another in such a gentle way after such a passionate release.

He works his way down Wille’s body, reverently washing each muscle, holding him under the warm water, treasuring this quiet moment together.

Simon places gentle kisses to the palm of Wille’s hands before shutting the shower off. Simon can’t wipe the silly smile off of his face.

Simon wraps Wille in his towel, another excuse to hold him tight before they don fresh, comfy clothes to go about their morning.

Simon can’t help but chuckle to himself as he considers his next question,

“Do you drink coffee?”

Wille’s face is the most adorable combination of amused and curious.

“Yes? Am I missing something?”

Simon tries to talk through his giggle fit but to no avail, managing only snip-its of;

“I just…”

“I mean…”

“I…”

Wille joins his laughter, obviously confused by the seemingly random fit, but indulging Simon nonetheless.

“I just came inside you, Wille, and I don’t even know how you take your coffee.”

Wille’s restrained laughter subsides, replaced with a booming belly laugh, both men double over at the crude realization.

Simon’s cheeks and abs hurt from smiling so hard and laughing so much.

When they finally regain a semblance of composure, Wille responds,

“I like my first cup of the day, black. But I’ll drink a latte too, if the flavor is appealing enough.”

Wille’s smirk makes Simon giddy. He wants to know all the little details about this man, however seemingly insignificant.

He walks over to Wille and places a chaste kiss on his lips,

“Let’s go get you that coffee, then”

“Let’s.”

This feels like the start of something special.

Chapter Text

Wille wakes up to gentle thunder outside his window. The storm is running its course as he lays, intertwined with the most beautiful person he has ever met. He allows the sounds to wash over him as he takes in Simon’s beauty.

His cheeks are adorably squished against the pillow, jaw slack as his gentle breath tickles Wille’s neck. His curls are flat on the sides but wild without any product. He is a vision in the early morning.

Wille can’t bear the thought of waking him from such a peaceful rest, so he slips out of bed slowly, careful not to startle him awake. He draws the covers over his shoulders, tucking him in before sneaking towards his closet. Wille grabs his sneakers and ball cap before tip toeing to the vacant hallway. He laces up his shoes and dons his hat before putting in his AirPods.

Morning runs are a sacred ritual for Wille. He loves the fatigue he feels pushing body to the limits, the sound of the base blaring through his headphones, the endorphin release upon completion. Wille doesn’t pay the weather any mind. He runs in nearly any condition. He loves surrendering himself to nature, something about it feels intrinsic, instinctual.

Wille hasn’t found a typical route yet but he enjoys a couple of miles wandering through Seattle’s hills until his legs can’t carry him any longer. Wille returns home to a still sleeping Simon. He is soaking wet but doesn’t dare to shower; he wants to avoid accidentally wake Simon up at any cost. Instead, Wille does his stretching circuit, allowing his muscles to contract and relax with intention as his heart rate returns to normal.

Wille is so focused in 151 Rum by JID that he doesn’t see Simon enter the room. He is stretching his right hip when he finally notices his sleepy lover, smiling at him.

“How long have you been standing there?”

Wille offers before realizing he is shouting. He removes his AirPods and assumes a normal volume.

Simon is smiling in response,

“Long enough to know that your right side is tighter than your left and you only say like half of the lyrics when you’re rapping.”

Wille is caught. He can’t help the blush spreading but tries to make up for it with a quick retort,

“So, you’re saying I should stick to writing?”

Content at his flirting and quick thinking, Wille smiles bright and big.

Simon responds in witty banter,

“I’d have to read your work before committing to such a statement, but it’s looking that way Wille.”

The two are a smiling, lovesick fools, exchanging grins as Simon crosses the room to sit on the floor next to Wille. The next question breaks Wille out of his reverie,

“What were you doing anyway? Like, why are you soaking wet?”

“I went for a run.”

He watches Simon’s face fall and then crinkle with laughter as he clarifies,

“On purpose? Outside?”

He can’t help his laughter,

“Yeah, on purpose.”

Determined to keep their flirtatious exchange going, Wille jokes,

“How do you think I maintain this pretty boy physique?”

Simon cackles at Wille’s suggestive shoulder movement before casually responding,

“Hmmm… I can think of a few ways”

Simon’s voices drops to the most delicious octave and he feels heat pool behind his navel. The electricity is palpable as the mood shifts from witty to sensual.

Wille knows that they just had sex last night, but his desire for Simon feels insatiable. He is convinced he could have sex with him every day for the rest of his life, and he would still want more. More Simon, always.

Wille doesn’t have time to second guess himself as he crashes into Simon. He kisses him with intention and Simon returns his passion with fervor. He needs more, he always needs more. He gently presses Simon into the carpet, covering him in his heavy, wet body. He feels his ball cap fall to the floor as Simon’s fingers slip into his wet head of hair. The gentle push and pull of Simon’s hands are everything. He can’t help the groan he lets out as he rolls their hips together. Simon reciprocates his dance, grinding against him in a way that could make him come untouched.

Wille feels Simons hands roam from his neck to his shoulders and back; grabbing at his sopping wet shirt that is suctioned to his skin. Simon can’t get any traction and Wille is half smiling at the frustrated groan Simon produces. Simon remains determined, moving his hands over Wille’s body until they settle on his waistband. Wille is overcome with a sharp pull as Simon grabs the fabric there and bucks into his growing erection. They continue like this, chasing friction until Simon rolls Wille onto his back.

The movement surprises Wille in a way that makes him desperate for more. Simon is so hot like this, confident and in control. Although he is usually taller and larger than his partners, Wille loves being dominated. There is something so incredibly sexy about giving up control to someone during such an intimate moment. Wille holds Simon’s impossibly narrow waist as they kiss, desperate to draw him ever closer.

To his surprise and delight, Simon gently grabs Wille’s wrists, interlocking their fingers before dragging his arms over head. Simon holds him in place while he slips his tongue into mouth, laying his body weight on Wille, kissing him with filthy passion while their hips move in tandem. He is totally gone for this man.

He doesn’t have time to feel self-conscious about the desperate moans that leave his mouth. He refuses to be embarrassed at his writhing passion and throbbing cock as Simon slips a leg between his. He wants the moment to last forever.

Simon’s teasing is relentless as he moves his leg against Wille’s hard length. Simon moves his kisses to his jaw, and down his neck. The saliva elicits goosebumps from his neck to his knees. He needs Simon to know,

“Fuck Simon, you’re so hot.”

Simon’s response is controlled and quiet in his neck as he pushes his wet shirt up his waist,

“You like when I take control, Wille?”

Wille groans at the questions, unable to formulate proper words with Simon’s body coaxing him towards orgasm.

Simon kisses down Wille’s chest, teasing his nipples with his tongue before moving further down his body. Wille feel’s Simons dainty hand palm his cock and the contact is heavenly. He groans at the teasing touch while Simon tortures him with the most sensual kisses until his head hovers between his legs.

Wille doesn’t dare move. His hands remain over his head, while Simon pins him to the ground, wet mouth teasing his erection through his pants.

Wille’s eyes meet Simon, and he knows what he needs.

“Simon, I want you.”

His voice is thick with lust. He can hear his own desperation as he adds,

“I want you to fuck me.”

Simon smiles the most beautiful, beaming grin before returning to his sexy persona,

“Do you want me to fuck you here, on the floor, or would you like to go to the bedroom?”

“Simon...”

He can’t help but linger on his name, moaning it into the quiet of the morning,

“I want you here, now.”

The statement comes out more like a plea, but Simon’s groan suggests he wants the same thing. His lover continues, gently tugging on his pants,

“May I?”

“Please, Simon”

Simon emerges from his spot at Wille’s waist, crawling up his body to place several sloppy kisses on his neck before reaching under his waist band.

“You’ll have to be patient for me, babe. I need to make sure you’re ready for me.”

Simon takes him in his hand, stroking him painfully slow, teasing his tip with a gentle touch meanwhile Wille is seeing stars. Lust clouds his vision and he aches for Simon.

“I’m going to need to grab some lube and then I would like to open you up if that’s okay?”

Simon low voice remains calm, sultry and suave.

Wille can’t help himself. He whines as Simon gets up to retrieve the lube, desperate for his quick return. He lightly palms himself in anticipation, he can’t ignore his throbbing cock as he anticipates Simon fucking his brains out.

Ever gentle, Simon resumes his position at Wille’s waist and carefully removes his pants. His touch lingers, a trail of fire on his skin. Simon breaks him out of his divine state,

“If it’s okay with you, I’d like to take over touching you while I open you up.”

Wille nods eagerly while Simon resumes his position at Wille’s groin, draping his arm over his right leg, stroking Wille’s aching cock, all while he uses his dominant hand to adjust his legs and expose his perineum to Simon.

His eyes are closed in pleasure, arm grasping for the man making him feel so desired. Wille moans loudly at the feeling of the cool lubricant on his exposed hole. He feels Simon’s tantalizing touch, teasing fingers exploring him, awaiting his consent.

“Please, Simon”

With a wicked grin, Simon slips one slick finger into Wille’s entrance. The pressure is heavy in his abdomen. He forces himself to relax around the intrusion, eager to have more of Simon; to feel him in his core.

Simon prolongs the torture, reverently fingering him. He feels like a prized possession as Simon responds to ever breathy sigh and twitch of his hips with more of exactly what Wille needs. He lets go of all inhibition, moaning at the pleasure as it builds and builds. Eager for more, he bucks his hips, meeting Simons fingers with each thrust, hitting that magical spot and begging for more,

“Simonnn… Please, Simon, I need you.”

To his relief, Simon doesn’t waste any time lubing up his hard dick. He has such a beautiful cock and Wille can’t wait to feel every inch of it. Simon holds eye contact with him as he teases his head into Wille’s tight hole. The sensation makes him dizzy with pleasure. It is overwhelming in exactly the way he needs most. Simon bottoms out and he is desperate for movement.

Wille wraps his legs around Simon, desperate to feel every inch as he thrusts into him. Sweat is pooling between them and the feeling of Simon’s abs on Wille’s aching erection is heavenly. The friction combined with Simon’s cock hitting his prostate makes him blind with pleasure.

He is so close already when Simon leans in to kiss him. Their bodies are completely flush as they move together. It is like they have never known another lover. It feels like coming home.

Simon moves his arms down Wille’s neck and shoulders, grabbing onto his wrists again, pinning them above his head while fucking him. Wille nearly cums in response but holds off the impending wave in hopes of falling over the edge together. He cries out with each shift of their bodies, overcome.

He hears Simon’s slightly ragged voice,

“You look so pretty like this, Wille. Taking me so well.”

Wille can only groan in return, bucking his hips up to meet every deep thrust. They are working in tandem, chasing orgasms together. Both, desperate for release.

Wille senses Simon’s climax building, his thrusts more erratic. Simon adjusts their position, blanketing Wille in his body, holding him firmly as he moves his lips to Wille’s ear,

“Let go for me, Wille. Come for me.”

Wille allows the pleasure to overcome him, consume him. He falls into an earth-shattering orgasm, contracting around Simon’s length in that way that send Simon over the edge with him. They crash together, erratic thrusts that become full body shutters as they spill their seed in sync.

Wille only hears his name over and over and over again. Simon sings it like a prayer, and it makes him feel like the most important person in the world.

As they quiver together, Simon gently releases Wille’s hands and wraps him into a tight hug. Wille feels totally cared for, secure in Simon’s arms.

Wille places gentle kisses on Simon’s neck and shoulders while they lie intertwined. Goosebumps litter their skin as the sweat dries and their breathing returns to normal.

Wille breaks their post coital bliss,

“Simon that was…so fucking hot. Holy shit, I mean that was insane. Single handedly the best sex I’ve ever had. Like… oh my god I feel like I’m seeing color for the first time.”

His vulnerable eyes meet Simon’s tender dark pools as they emerge from their hiding spot on his shoulder, and they share ridiculously wide smile.

Simon responds in earnest,

“So, you feel it too?”

It’s never felt like this with anyone else.

They share a content sigh; exchanging a knowing glance and lazy kiss before Simon offers,

“Shall we get you cleaned up, pretty boy?”

Simon adds a wink, chuckling at their new inside joke.

Laying on the charm thick, Wille responds,

“I don’t know, I think I really like dirty Simon.”

Simon lets out a guttural laugh at his dirty joke, tickling his sides in retaliation.

Wille can only take the torture for so long before he surrenders, waving his discarded ball cap in the air, in lieu of a white flag.

Simon extends a hand, pulling Wille towards the shower.

“I want to take care of you, Wille.”

***

Wille is left clenching around nothing, missing the space that Simon now occupied in his body and heart. Simon offers to put a record on while they shower. He chose Kota the Friend’s Everything album. BQE plays in the background by the time the water heats up and they both stand in its pillowing steam.

Simon is caring for Wille in a way that feels sacred, washing his hair leisurely and massaging his scalp in a way that makes Wille groan. Simon’s sudsy hands explore his body in a way that feels more intimate than sexual.

This is the type of aftercare Wille always dreamt of, but never received. His sexual fantasies included this kind of vulnerability, but he always assumed it was out of reach.

He recognized his own feelings in Simon’s confession yesterday. Both men have been searching for something they never though they’d find, until now.

Simon works his way down Wille’s body, reverently washing each muscle, holding him under the warm water, treasuring this quiet moment together.

Wille receives every touch and gentle kiss like a desert does rain.

Simon wraps Wille in his towel, and Wille uses it as another excuse to hold him close. They dress in comfortable silence until Simon’s quiet giggle bursts their bubble,

“Do you drink coffee?”

Wille can’t help the obvious confusion that colors his face as he reciprocates Simon’s curious giggle,

“Yes? Am I missing something?”

Simon tries to talk through his giggle fit but to no avail, managing only snip-its of;

“I just…”

“I mean…”

“I…”

Wille can’t help but join in, confused by the seemingly random fit, but indulging the adorable outburst, eager to hear Simon’s train of thought.

“I just came inside you, Wille, and I don’t even know how you take your coffee.”

Wille’s cautious chuckle is replaced with a booming belly laugh. They are nearly doubled over at the sentiment, gasping for air between hearty fits of joy.

When the breath finally returns to Wille’s lungs, he manages,

“I like my first cup of the day, black. But I’ll drink a latte too, if the flavor is appealing enough.”

Simon walks over to Wille and places a chaste kiss on his lips,

“Let’s go get you that coffee, then”

“Let’s.”

They have so much to learn about one another and Wille can hardly wait.

Chapter Text

After both men dress, Simon spends a couple of minutes orienting himself to Wille’s neighborhood before choosing a coffee shop. The options are abundant but with his connection to Cafe Ladro, he doesn’t often explore outside of his usual spots.

Simon finds a shop that looks cozy; a safe haven from the cool rain and crisp ocean breeze. The pictures show furniture in it that is reminiscent of someone’s home, well-loved armchairs and ottomans, water-stained side tables and warm lamps.

The menu is limited but Wille says he usually starts his day with black coffee anyway.

“I’ve got a place for us if you’re okay with a small walk.”

Simon looks up from his phone to a smiling Wille,

“Absolut”

Wille offers Simon one of his heavier jackets and the two brave the weather together.

Simon feels so light despite the Seattle gloom that greets them. The rain and wind is intermittent but consistent. They walk side by side, bumping arms, never too far apart.

A couple blocks into their adventure, Simon feels Wille’s finger skim his hand, searching. Simon blushes at the innocent touch, reciprocating it eagerly, butterflies fluttering in his stomach.

Their cat and mouse game is equal parts wholesome and sweet. He steadies his swaying hand and catches Wille’s in passing.

“Is this okay, Wille?”

His reciprocating grin is reassuring but he adds,

“Yes, totally. I really like it, actually. If you haven’t noticed, I’m a really touchy person. But I always want to respect your boundaries, so please let me know.”

Simon squeezes Wille’s hand, tugging on his arm to get his full eye contact,

“Hey Wille, I like it. I like how touchy you are. It’s really reassuring.”

The two share a smile while Simon’s words linger between them. His mind is running a mile a minute with everything he wants to say to Wille. The pause is pregnant with quiet contemplation. The wind howls, challenging him to be brave.

He wants to tell Wille everything. How all of his relationships were so different than this. How he has been someone’s first, someone’s secret, someone’s fuck buddy, someone’s friend, someone’s distraction, always someone… but never him. He wants to explain away why he was so emotional last night, lay his scars from the past and emotional baggage out for Wille to sift through, to cringe at, to appreciate despite its mess. He wants to lay his vulnerability on the line without fear of loosing the magic of this moment, of loosing them, before they are even ‘them’.

Simon slows his racing thoughts, assures Mother Nature with a silent prayer that the time would come for such a confession, but it wasn’t right now.

Instead, Simon brings their linked hands up to his mouth and presses a sweet kiss to the back of Wille’s wet hand.

As they walk, Simon offers up a couple of questions that have been tugging at his periphery.

“So Wille, I didn’t get the chance to see your entire record collection, but at first glance it’s quite impressive. You have a decent variety too.”

Wille smiles at the compliment, a slight blush, no doubt at the memory of the last time they talked about music.

“What’s your Spotify top five this year?”

Simon is genuinely curious to hear the answer, to untangle the mystery of the complex man who captivates him. He wants to know what Wille listens to when he is blocking out the rest of the world around him, what moves him.

“Well, I’m really into hip hop and rap. I love poetry so I naturally gravitate to that style. My top five artists though are:

1. Kota the Friend
2. J. Cole
3. Kendrick Lamar
4. Cordae
5. Jack Harlow

But I try to keep an open mind to all kinds of music.”

Simon can’t help but smile. Music has always been his happy place, and he loves having a little peek into someone else’s world.

“Mine is probably pretty mainstream compared to yours. What’s your top five?”

Simon chuckles at the assumption, earning a relaxed smile from Wille. Everyone always assumes his taste is elevated because he studies music when in reality he listens to a lot of the same music as everyone else.

“It’s so funny you say that because everyone always makes that assumption because I’m a music teacher. Of course, I had to learn all the classics and they hold a special place in my heart, but I really like pop and hip hop. I also listen to quite a bit of Latin music as well.

My top five artists are:
1. Doechii
2. Amine
3. Charlie xcx
4. Bryce Vine
5. Kendrick Lamar

I will say I had a lot of Kota in my top one hundred though and I was pretty surprised when he wasn’t in my top five.

Cordae though…that’s a deeper cut. You must be a real hip hop head.”

Simon nudges Wille, flashing his most dazzling smile to ensure his compliment is clear.

“That’s actually really fucking cool, Wille. I love that.”

Wille is glowing, radiating at the praise. Almost shy but more smug, than anything else.

“Your top is so fun! I think it suits you so well too, edgy and fun. Authentic artistry that is still relatable.”

Wille continues,

“What got you into music?”

Simon practices his best poker face while he considers the best way to answer the question.

He decides to be honest,

“You know, my dad did. He was always a talented musician, and he inspired me from a young age. It was something we always did as a family, especially in the evenings because my mom worked second and third shift at the hospital.”

Wille, the ever-attentive ear,

“Are you two close, you and your dad?”

Simon sighs,

“Not anymore. I will always love him, he’s my dad, after all. He suffers from addiction, so it makes having a relationship with him very challenging. He’s always been an addict but when my parents got divorced, he really spiraled. He became belligerent and abusive, while I became the man of the house, you know? I was the protector for my mother and sister.”

He can’t help but chuckle,

“It’s complicated, you know? He introduced me to music, which is such a huge part of my identity. Music was my first love.”

Simon sighs,

“…but he also hurt me. Hurt us. It has never been malicious, and I understand that as an adult but, yeah.”

“Wow I can’t imagine how hard that must have been. That’s so much responsibility to take on baseline, and that doesn’t even account for the mental load that comes with it.”

Wille pauses, always intentional when he speaks,

“I think it’s really brave that you still love and appreciate music. It would have been really easy to write off that passion out of anger or resentment, but you didn’t.”

Wille gives a squeeze of their hands, rubbing his thumb over the back of Simon’s hand in a gentle circle.

“You’re incredible Simon.”

Their gaze meets and he can see the genuine pride in Wille’s eyes. His words are always so sincere, but his eyes feel like the real window into his soul. The flecks of brown and gold in the amber pools sparkle like white caps on a windy body of water.

Desperate to keep the mood reassuring and light, Simon pulls Wille in for a kiss on the cheek and whispers in his ear,

“You don’t know the half of it.”

Simon wiggles his eyebrows as he pulls away, but Wille is already giggling out loud,

“I think I have some idea.”

He has a mischievous grin on his face as he emphasizes every syllable.

Simon pulls them into their destination, and they wait in line, smiling at the memories they are making together.

“What can I get for you two?”

The voice is confident and practiced. The barista peers over their wire rim glasses and pushes up their sleeves before typing into an iPad.

Simon speaks first, having reviewed the menu before they left Wille’s apartment,

“I’d love a 12oz pour over, black.”

Wille interjects,

“Make that two, please.”

He flashes his crooked grin in that ever-charming way and before Simon can protest, Wille is handing over a credit card and paying for their drinks.

Simon reaches out to interject but the barista is already handing Wille a receipt,

“Wille…”

Before he can respond, the barista challenges,

“Let your boyfriend pay, honey.”

This tickles them both and Wille repeats,

“Yeah, let your boyfriend pay, honey.”

Wille’s throws Simon a wink and the two move towards the other end of the counter, awaiting their morning nectar wearing their stupid lovesick smiles with pride.

They don’t have to wait long for their beverages, before they grab the drinks and nestle in a cozy love seat by the window.

The two are watching strangers shuffle past on the wet sidewalk when Simon breaks their comfortable silence,

“I’d say she is heading to work, customer service somewhere. It’s too late to be healthcare but too early to be a store front. Maybe a waitress?”

Wille quickly indulges his line of questioning, eyes smiling,

“Oh, she’s in food and beverage but not a brick-and-mortar restaurant. Look at those practical black sneakers, pleated trousers, white collar peeking out of her rain jacket. She’s waitstaff for a wedding or event. Saturday at 10:18am? I’ll bet she has a 10:45am start time.”

Simon can’t help being impressed at the attention to detail Wille demonstrates.

“Oh yes, indeed. Black tie formal, no doubt. What will the entrees be? Salmon and scalloped potatoes? No, no. Chicken piccata and long grain rice?”

Wille gives a chef’s kiss to no one in particular,

“Ah yes, the obvious choice.”

The humor in his voice evident, as he feigns a pretentious tone.

They both break character and chuckle a little too loudly, coffee threatening to spill over the edge as they laugh.

Wille’s face drops suddenly, and Simon follows his gaze to a car accident unfolding in front of them.

A silver Lexus SUV must have hydroplaned through the red light, spinning out of control as it crashes into a dark blue minivan starting its commute.

The noise is startling, metal crashing into metal, tires screeching to regain control. The sound echoes through the narrow one-way street, drawing everyone’s attention in the cafe.

Strangers jump into action, good samaritains calling 911 and attending to both drivers, who appear okay at first glance. The car engines are steaming, grey smoke pillowing, joining the overcast above while rain falls relentlessly.

Simon hears sirens in the background, responding to the devastation in front of them.

Simon peels his eyes away to check in with Wille, to process the situation unfolding in front of them when he notices his lover’s demeanor.

The blood is drained from his face, his usual milky skin is a sickly gray green hue. His breathing is shallow, hands shaking uncontrollably as he presses a palm firmly to his sternum, rubbing vigorously.

Wille mutters something incoherently as he rises from his spot and rushes towards the bathroom. Simon follows suit, abandoning their seats and beverages to check on the man unraveling in front of him. He catches the bathroom door before it slams shut.

Wille is on the ground in front of the toilet, vomiting up the contents of his stomach. Simon hears desperate, shallow breaths between episodes of hurling.

He doesn’t have time to process the situation before springing into action. He grabs a couple of paper towels from the dispenser and wets them with cool water before placing them on the back of Wille’s neck. He holds his long bangs back as the man wretch’s coffee initially, followed by bile.

Simon is whispering reassurances to Wille,

“It’s okay, I’m here, baby.”

“You are safe. I’ve got you.”

“Try to focus on your breathing Wille. I’m right here.”

Wille unfreezes from his spot on the toilet bowl, wiping the tears from his face and sweat from his forehead.

Simon flushes the contents and helps Wille into a sitting position where his head was just resting.

“Wille, I need you to look at me. I need to see your eyes.”

Wille’s, red rimmed gaze meets his with obvious reluctance and noteworthy distance. Simon can tell Wille’s mind is elsewhere. He’s pieces together the moment and tries to draw Wille out of his panic attack, back to reality.

“Wille, we are going to breathe together, okay? I need you to breathe in through your nose with me, and then we will hold it for three seconds before letting it go. Can you do that with me?”

Still mute, a shell-shocked husk of a person, Wille nods in response.

Grateful for any acknowledgement, Simon starts the breathing exercise, placing Wille’s shaking hand on his own chest to feel its rise and fall.

“Focus on me, Wille. Focus on breathing with me. In through the nose, hold, and out through the mouth.”

The first attempt is shuttered and stifled but Wille’s breath slowly improves, falling in sync with Simon’s over the next several minutes.

Simon’s knees are tired, legs falling asleep, but all he can focus on is Wille.

“Hey Wille, babe?”

His sweetheart meets his gaze, eyes heavy and face riddled with emotion as he attempts to regain any semblance of control.

“I’m going to call us an Uber to try and get you home, okay?”

Simon watches as Wille’s pupils dilate and body tenses at the suggestion. Fear is written all over his face.

“No, please! I can’t.”

Wille’s pleas, obviously louder than he intended. The volume drops to a shaky whisper,

“I can’t get into a car right now.”

Simon is piecing together the situation. The car accident triggered a panic attack for Wille. He doesn’t understand why yet but that’s not his concern. He needs to get Wille home and safe.

Simon brings his hands to Wille’s cheek and strokes it lightly,

“That’s no problem. Hey, sweetheart, Wille, it’s okay.”

Simon’s eyes are sincere, desperate to wrap Wille in his warmth and take care of him.

“Do you think you can walk?”

Wille nods in response, rising to his feet slowly with Simon’s arms supporting him.

Simon remembers seeing a back entrance, guiding Wille through its exit to avoid the emergency vehicles and crowd forming around the accident.

Simon keeps his arm around Wille’s waist, guiding him by memory back to the apartment. The rain shows no mercy, restlessly pounding them as they trek together, wind howling around them.

Wille’s lobby is a welcome reprieve. Both men are soaked to the bone, dripping wet, but relieved to have made it to their destination.

As they cross the threshold and undress from their sopping wet outfits, Wille murmurs,

“I’m sorry.”

Simon turns on a dime to face him, startled by the apology and desperate to reassure him. Wille looks so small like this, head hanging low and shoulders sagging.

Simon takes Wille’s face in both hands, forcing eye contact before starting,

“Hey, hey, hey, there is no apology needed, Wille.”

Simon pauses before continuing,

“If you want to talk about it later, I’m all ears. But there’s so pressure either. First, let’s get you warmed up, so you don’t catch a cold. Okay?”

Wille attempts a weak smile in return, but his eyes betray him. Simon can see him fighting to regain control of his heart and mind, clawing his way out of the ugly pit of depression and anxiety post panic attack.

Simon leads them to the bathroom, sitting Wille on the toilet seat while he draws a bath. Searching the cupboards for bubble bath or Epsom salt, he finds both, pouring a generous amount of each in, before turning off the water. Wille remains glazed over, quiet and contemplative while Simon guides him to the baths edge, prompting him to undress before ushering him in the hot tub.

“Simon?”

His voice is stronger now, less distant as he de thaws,

“Will you stay with me?”

Simon doesn’t hesitate, sinking onto the floor next to Wille,

“Of course.”

Always, Wille. I’ll always stay.

Chapter Text

Both men dress in casual comfort, Wille lending Simon more clothes that are too tall and large, drowning his petite frame in a way that makes him look utterly delectable.

Wille can’t help but smile as he watches Simon search online for a suitable coffee spot. Wille learns that Simon is a bit of a coffee connoisseur, his roommate working for a well-known roaster locally, leaving him privy to all the “coffee gossip” as new shops emerge on the scene. It’s very cute the way Simon dives into the task at hand, finding them ‘the right blend of quality coffee and a cozy atmosphere’. After several minutes of pinched brows and noncommittal hums, Simon breaks the silence,

“I’ve got a place for us if you’re okay with a small walk.”

Wille can’t help his goofy smile at the suggestion,

“Absolut”

Wille knows that Simon gets cold easily, so he offers the man one of his heavier jackets to brave the Seattle weather.

The rain and wind appear to have lightened up slightly from his morning run, proving consistent but less ruinous. The two walk side by side, close enough that they bump arms and brush hands frequently.

Wille allows his fingers to graze Simon’s hand, searching for real estate in their little game of life. He thinks he sees Simon blush at the continued attempts, which only encourages him further.

The coy ploy feels equally wholesome and flirtatious. Simon is the one who seals their fate, steadying Wille’s swaying hand and interlocking their fingers.

“Is this okay, Wille?”

Wille can’t help his wide-eyed grin but adds reassurance for good measure,

“Yes, totally. I really like it, actually. If you haven’t noticed, I’m a really touchy person. But I always want to respect your boundaries, so please let me know.”

Simon squeezes Wille’s hand, tugging on his arm to get his full eye contact,

“Hey Wille, I like it. I like how touchy you are. It’s really reassuring.”

The two share a smile while Simon’s words linger between them. Wille’s mind races a mile a minute at what he wants to say.

He wants to tell Simon that it’s never felt like this with anyone else. He wants to put all his cards on the table, lay himself bare; insecurities, anxieties, fears, baggage, desires. He wants to strip himself naked in a way that lasts a lifetime; where Simon carefully peels back his layers and likes him for all that he is and all that he isn’t. He aches with longing.

Wille’s spiraling thoughts halt when Simon brings their linked hands up to his mouth and presses a sweet kiss to the back of his rain-soaked hand. Wille will focus on this moment with Simon, revel in what they have right now. He refuses to allow his anxiety to sabotage this, them.

Simon fills the comfortable silence with a question,

“So Wille, I didn’t get the chance to see your entire record collection, but at first glance it’s quite impressive. You have a decent variety too.”

Wille smiles at the compliment, heat rising to his face at the fresh memory of their last music discussion.

Simon graciously ignores his boyish grin,

“What’s your Spotify top five this year?”

The answer is near immediate for Wille. Although he prides himself on listening to all genres, he certainly has a favorite,

“Well, I’m really into hip hop and rap. I love poetry so I naturally gravitate to that style. My top five artists though are:

1. Kota the Friend
2. J. Cole
3. Kendrick Lamar
4. Cordae
5. Jack Harlow

But I try to keep an open mind to all kinds of music.”

Slightly self-conscious, Wille adds,

“Mine is probably pretty mainstream compared to yours. What’s your top five?”

Simon offers a gentle chuckle, the origin unclear although he quickly responds,

“It’s so funny you say that because everyone always makes that assumption because I’m a music teacher. Of course, I had to learn all the classics and they hold a special place in my heart, but I really like pop and hip hop. I also listen to quite a bit of Latin music as well.

My top five artists are:
1. Doechii
2. Amine
3. Charlie xcx
4. Bryce Vine
5. Kendrick Lamar

I will say I had a lot of Kota in my top one hundred though and I was pretty surprised when he wasn’t in my top five.

Cordae though…that’s a deeper cut. You must be a real hip hop head.”

Simon nudges Wille, flashing his most dazzling smile. He melts at the sincere compliment.

“That’s actually really fucking cool
Wille. I love that.”

If he wasn’t glowing before, he is now; radiating at Simon’s contagious sunshine. Wille tries to tamper his shit eating grin, to no avail.

Realizing he has yet to respond to Simon’s top five, Wille continues, eager to return the compliment,

“Your top is so fun! I think it suits you really well; edgy and fun. Authentic artistry that is still relatable. What got you into music?”

Simon pauses before answering,

“You know, my dad did. He was always a talented musician, and he inspired me from a young age. It was something we always did as a family, especially in the evenings because my mom worked second and third shift at the hospital.”

Wille listens with curiosity, attuned to complicated family dynamics, sensing there may be more to the story,

“Are you two close, you and your dad?”

Simon sighs,

“Not anymore. I will always love him, he’s my dad, after all. He suffers from addiction, so it makes having a relationship with him very challenging. He’s always been an addict but when my parents got divorced, he really spiraled. He became belligerent and abusive, while I became the man of the house, you know? I was the protector for my mother and sister.”

Simon chuckles before continuing,

“It’s complicated, you know? He introduced me to music, which is such a huge part of my identity. Music was my first love…but he also hurt me. Hurt us. It has never been malicious, and I understand that as an adult but, yeah.”

Wille is so impressed by Simon. His casual strength and resilience really speak to his character. He responds to the best of his ability; giving him the empathy and support he deserves,

“Wow I can’t imagine how hard that must have been. That’s so much responsibility to take on baseline, and that doesn’t even account for the mental load that comes with it all.”

Wille pauses, determined to continue,

“I think it’s really brave that you still love and appreciate music. It would have been really easy to write that passion off out of anger or resentment, but you didn’t.”

Wille gives a squeeze of their hands, rubbing his thumb over the back of Simon’s hand in a gentle circle.

“You’re incredible Simon.”

Their gaze meets and Wille can see the careful vulnerability in Simon’s eyes. His dark pools, always deeper than the surface.

Simon pulls Wille out of his thoughts for a kiss on the cheek and whispers in his ear,

“You don’t know the half of it.”

Wille always appreciates the balance Simon strikes between levity and vulnerability. It makes conversation so comfortable and easy.

Simon wiggles his eyebrows as he pulls away and Wille allows himself to giggle out loud,

“I think, I have some idea.”

He can’t help his smug, mischievous grin at the intonation.

Simon pulls them into their destination, and they wait in line, smiling at the memories they are making together.

“What can I get for you two?”

The voice is confident and practiced. The barista peers over their wire rim glasses and pushes up their sleeves before typing into an iPad.

Simon speaks first, having reviewed the menu before they left Wille’s apartment,

“I’d love a 12oz pour over, black.”

Wille interjects,

“Make that two, please.”

Wille flashes his most charming grin, and before Simon can protest, Wille hands over his credit card to pay for their drinks.

Simon reaches out to interject but the barista is already handing Wille his receipt,

“Wille…”

Before Wille has the chance to respond, the barista pipes up,

“Let your boyfriend pay, honey.”

The butterflies threaten his composure, but he repeats the baristas sentiment with glee,

“Yeah, let your boyfriend pay, honey.”

Wille winks for good measure, and the two move towards the other end of the counter, awaiting their morning nectar with eager anticipation and lingering smiles.

They don’t have to wait long for their beverages. Once they are ready, they grab their coffees and nestle into a comfortable love seat by the window.

They slowly sip their hot coffees, watching strangers brave the wet world, when Simon breaks their comfortable silence;

“I’d say she is heading to work, customer service somewhere. It’s too late to be healthcare but too early to be a store front. Maybe a waitress?”

Wille loves this game, eager to respond in kind,

“Oh, she’s in food and beverage but not a brick-and-mortar restaurant. Look at those practical black sneakers, pleated trousers, white collar peeking out of her rain jacket. She’s waitstaff for a wedding or event. Saturday at 10:18am? I’ll bet she has a 10:45am start time.”

When he dares a glance at Simon, he looks impressed, or simply giddy to indulge the narrative they’re developing,

“Oh yes, indeed. Black tie formal, no doubt. What will the entrees be? Salmon and scalloped potatoes? No, no. Chicken piccata and long grain rice?”

Wille responds to the silly assumptions with a chef’s kiss to no one in particular,

“Ah yes, the obvious choice.”

He imitates his most pretentious tone he can muster.

They both break character and chuckle a little too loudly, coffee threatening to spill over the edge as they laugh.

His perfect morning comes to a screeching halt as Wille sees the devastation unfolding in front of him. A wave of panic blankets him in a cold sweat as he watches a silver Lexus hydroplane through a red light. The crash takes place in front of him in slow motion, crushing metal and squealing tires. The dark blue minivan is oblivious until it is too late, forced to brace for impact as the two collide in a violence he wouldn’t wish on anyone.

Erik.

Frozen, the world around him fades into the background, he feels like he is underwater. His mouth is filled with cotton, dry and starchy. He can’t breathe, he swallows his vomit before rushing to the bathroom.

He knows Simon is nearby, but he can’t face him. He mutters something about having to go, but he is nearly five paces away before the words leave his mouth.

He barely makes it to the toilet before throwing up the contents of his stomach. A violent reckoning, far preferable to the thoughts running through his head.

All Wille can think of is Erik. The phone call that changed his life forever. The totaled car. The news coverage. The media frenzy. The closed cassette funeral. The gaping hole in Wille’s heart.

Losing the only person who ever loved him for him.

Wille is hyperventilating between retching episodes. The burn in his throat reminds him that this is real. The grief, the pain, the longing, the loss; they are all real. Aching wounds of his hurting heart.

He feels a cool paper towel on the back of his neck, and that is real.

He feels Simon’s fingers holding back his hair, and that is real.

He feels Simon’s soothing voice echo in the small, tiled room, and that is real:

“It’s okay, I’m here, baby.”

“You are safe. I’ve got you.”

“Try to focus on your breathing Wille. I’m right here.”

After what feels like forever, Wille reluctantly rises from his spot in front of the toilet bowl, wiping away his tears and sweat, while Simon helps him into a sitting position.

Simon’s voice reaches through the fog,

“Wille, I need you to look at me. I need to see your eyes.”

He does his best to focus on Simon but all he can think about is Erik.

Was it quick?
Was it painful?
Was he lonely?
Was he scared?
Why?
Why?
Why?

“Wille, we are going to breathe together, okay? I need you to breathe in through your nose with me, and then we will hold it for three seconds before letting it go. Can you do that with me?”

Simon’s sweet, melodic voice cuts through his train of thought. He nods at the instruction, focusing on controlling his shallow breathing.

Simon starts the breathing exercise, placing Wille’s shaking hand on his own chest to feel its rise and fall.

“Focus on me, Wille. Focus on breathing with me. In through the nose, hold, and out through the mouth.”

The first attempt is shuttered and stifled but Wille’s breath slowly improves, falling in sync with Simon’s over the next several minutes.

He feels Simon’s smooth chest rise and fall under his hand, that is real.

He feels Simon’s heart beating under his sternum, and that is real.

He feels Simon’s soft hand on his own, and that is real.

“Hey Wille, babe? I’m going to call us an Uber to try and get you home, okay?”

Panic resurges and Wille is shaking vehemently, pleading,

“No, please! I can’t.”

His voice drops to a shaky whisper as he continues,

“I can’t get into a car right now.”

Simon gives a definitive nod of agreement, bringing his hands to Wille’s cheeks and stroking them,

“That’s no problem. Hey, sweetheart, Wille, it’s okay.”

Simon’s eyes are sincere, desperate to care for him.

“Do you think you can walk?”

All Wille can do is nod, relying on Simon’s arms to help him up from his stupor.

Simon guides them both and Wille follows without hesitation. He focuses on Simon’s arm around his waist as they walk. One step at a time. One block at a time. He focuses on the rain on their skin. He focuses on the wind whistling around them.

Wille’s apartment lobby swallows them whole as they shake off their rain-soaked outer layer.

As they cross the threshold of his apartment, Wille finally manages to speak,

“I’m sorry.”

Simon abruptly turns around to meet his gaze, taking his tear-stained cheeks in his cold, wet hands;

“Hey, hey, hey, there is no apology needed, Wille. If you want to talk about it later, I’m all ears. But there’s so pressure either. First, let’s get you warmed up, so you don’t catch a cold. Okay?”

Wille attempts a weak smile, fighting his demons relentlessly, but grateful for the selfless man in front of him, reassuring him.

Simon leads them to the bathroom, sitting him on the toilet seat while he draws a bath. Just like last night, Simon makes himself at home, searching the cupboards for bubble bath and Epsom salt. The domestic nature of the scene in front of him is so wholesome and selfless, he could cry.

Simon guides him to the baths edge, prompting him to undress before ushering him in the hot bubble bath.

“Simon?”

He channels every ounce of remaining strength to ask,

“Will you stay with me?”

Simon doesn’t hesitate, sinking onto the floor next to Wille before responding with utmost tenderness,

“Of course.”

For the first time since the panic attack started, he feels safe.

Simon is here, Simon is staying. He is safe with Simon.

Chapter Text

Simon

Simon holds Wille’s hand until the water goes tepid and bubbles disappear. He counts the freckles on his hand and imagines the constellations they form. He brainstorms their names and stories to prevent his anxious mind from worrying about Wille. His Wille.

Simon hums in the space between them, a habit so second nature he doesn’t realize he is doing it until Wille joins in.

Their voices harmonize until the invisible melody draws to a close. Wille breaks the silence first,

“You’re cold”

His voice, matter of fact, as he points to the goosebumps on Simon’s arm.

Simon begins to argue but before he gets the words out, Wille is draining
the bathtub.

“It’s your turn, Simon.”

Recognizing his reluctance Wille insists,

“I need to get up and stretch my legs anyway. They don’t make these tubs nearly big enough. Plus, if I don’t get out soon, I’ll turn into a prune.”

It is nice to hear Wille joking again. There is more life to his voice and while his eyes remain contemplative, sad even, they are no longer distant and glazed over. Wille is slowly returning from whatever horror consumed him earlier.

Eager to reciprocate the lightheartedness, Simon grabs a towel from the rack nearby and wraps it around Wille, giving him a big hug as he whispers,

“A very cute prune”

Wille squeezes him tight, nuzzling his damp hair into the crook of Simon’s neck. They stay like this until the drain gargles the last few sips of bath water, queuing them to separate.

“I’m going to get dressed while you shower, okay?”

Simon nods in agreement and watches as Wille makes his way towards the bedroom.

Luckily, Wille’s bath was long enough that the water heater was ready to go when he turned the shower handle as hot as it could go.

He lets the hot water cascade over every inch of his skin until he looks sunburnt under the warm steam. His joints and muscles finally relax.

An empath at his core, Simon’s holds tension in his body. He feels stress, even if it isn’t his, in every fiber of his being. Fortunately, a hot shower will usually do the trick in coaxing it out of him.

Eager to check in on Wille, Simon turns off the shower and wanders into Wille’s room wrapped in a towel, in search for more of his clothes to drown in. Wille is sitting on the bed, looking as cozy as ever, with a pile of fresh sweats stacked next to him for Simon to wear.

Even on his worst day, Wille is taking care of Simon. The small gesture is so thoughtful, it makes Simon’s heart swell.

He dresses quickly, appreciating the smell of Wille’s detergent as he pulls another stolen hoodie over his head. Wille pats the spot beside him on the bed, urging Simon to join him.

Wille’s face is emotional but brave, lips in a tight, pursed manner with determination etched across his forehead.

“Erik, my brother, died in a car accident.”

Wille’s words shock him silent. All of the puzzle pieces of the morning suddenly fit together, context filling in the unknown.

“At first, I just wanted to disassociate completely. Self-destruct under the guise of a grief stricken, deeply tormented rich kid. Typical elitist bullshit where I had plenty of money and easy access to drugs. I started self-medicating because I didn’t know what else to do. And honestly, my circle of friends and family didn’t know how to have a real fucking conversation with me about how I was feeling so they just let me self-destruct.

I started having panic attacks every day, multiple times per day. I felt like I was dying. The adrenaline rush and subsequent crash felt like I was stuck on a rollercoaster that I couldn’t get off of. I had had panic attacks before, but they were never this severe… and Erik had always been there. He was my safe space. I was the black sheep of our entire social circle, but with Erik, I was just Wille. Fast forward, I was completely alone, grieving this tremendous loss, self-medicating, and spiraling.

At first, running was just a way to build up my walls. A way of proving to the rest of the world, ‘I’m fine. Sure, I’m partying until four in the morning. Sure, I’m mixing pills and booze. Sure, I’m going home with strangers. Sure, I’m unraveling internally… but I am getting up and running every morning so don’t question my functionality.’ It was a way to justify my actions and avoid the reality that I was very much not okay. But somewhere along the line, I started liking running. It became a healthy outlet as I started therapy.

All in all, despite doing a lot of work internally, I still have a lot of anxiety about cars and driving. I’ve graduated to using public transit which has felt like a big step in the right direction. Logically, I know that cars aren’t inherently dangerous. Like, I know that Erik’s death wasn’t because of the car but seeing an accident like that. It’s just too much.”

Simon holds Wille’s clammy hand during his monologue, listening intently and piecing together all the little pieces of a Wille that he is desperate to know.

Simon’s heart is conflicted; touched that Wille trusts him enough to share such intimate details of his life, while being heartbroken for the grief he had to endure alone. He wants to go back in time and support Wille the way he needed and deserved.

But he has right now. He can do that now.

Simon turns on the bed and wraps his arms around Wille. The position is awkward at first but the two melt into one another, contorting their bodies in a way that feels custom built.

Simon places a hand in Wille’s damp hair and strokes the back of head,

“I am so sorry, Wille. I am so, so sorry. I can’t imagine going through what you have. Grief is so complicated, and you need to know, you’ve done nothing wrong. You’re doing the best you can in the circumstances you are in and that’s fucking brave. You are so strong…”

Simon squeezes Wille extra close, placing fierce but gentle kisses in his hair before continuing,

“…and you are not alone anymore. You have me now.”

Simon feels emotion wrack through Wille in gentle tremors as he quietly cries. Simon refuses to let go, holding him tightly, steadying him, until his lovers’ eyes dry up and muscles relax into his grip. He traces invisible patterns on his broad back and shoulders, soothing him the best way he knows how.

Wille whispers into the space between them, as reverent as a prayer,

“Thank you, Simon”

“No thanks necessary, pretty boy.”

A quiet chuckle bubbles, turning into a rolling boil of laughter between the two of them. Wille’s head falls back and Simon collapses forward into his lap, both out of breath from amusement.

“I’m never going to live that nickname down, am I?”

Wille asks, an improving lightness in his eyes.

“I’m afraid not…”

Simon starts, his lips twitch up into a smile as he considers his next sentence,

“…especially not when you look this cute after a panic attack.”

Simon can’t help but flirt, seeing how it makes Wille blush bright and smile wide.

He is rewarded with a sincere, guttural laugh, scoffing at Simon’s suggestion, but obviously flattered by the compliment.

Simon watches as Wille returns to himself over the next several minutes. Anxiety dissolving between the two as Simon makes lighthearted conversation to draw the demons away.

***

Simon’s grumbling stomach coaxes them out of the bedroom to Wille’s barren kitchen.

“Oh my gosh, I forgot that your kitchen is embarrassingly empty, Wille”

Wille rolls his eyes at Simon’s criticism before snuggling in behind him and wrapping his arms around his waist.

“I guess I wasn’t expecting any company…”

Wille whispers into the crook of his neck, sending shivers down Simon’s spine at Wille’s wet lips.

Simon lets his head fall back over Wille’s shoulder, opening his neck and throat up to the universe, an offering,

“Oh, you weren’t, huh?”

Simon teases back. He can feel Wille’s chest against his back, his hands tighten around his waist,

“So, your apartment is always this clean then?”

Simon continues the banter. He can feel Wille’s smile as he turns his head towards his strong jaw, he gives his best impression at innocent doe eyes as he meets Wille’s gaze.

Wille always looks at him with such reverence; a mix of wonder, warmth, and desire.

“…well, not always this clean.”

Wille admits sheepishly, smile reaching to his ears as he tickles Simon’s waist.

Their laugh echoes like their moans did this morning, breathing life into the space.

When their giggling subsides, the two are entangled in a half hug.

“Door dash, then?”

Wille offers, sincere eyes turned up in question.

“…Unless you need to get home.”

Oh Wille, sweet, sweet, Wille. All amber eyes, fresh skin, wet hair, constellations of freckles he wants to spend the foreseeable memorizing, ever considerate;

“Door dash…”

Simon moves to his tip toes, reaching his hands into Wille’s wet hair and pump lips into his ear,

“…but only if you, ‘let your boyfriend pay, honey’”

He lets his breath brush Wille’s neck, sending goosebumps across his skin as he repeats their baristas sassy remark, another inside joke to add to their growing collection.

Wille groans, fake exasperated, drawing out each syllable,

“Finneee…”

Pausing for a beat before continuing,

“…Under one condition?”

Simon chuckles into the limited space between them, placing gentle kisses on his neck as Wille argues his case,

“And that is?”

Simon offers; his own skin flush, each innocent touch and squeeze at his waist, sending delicious warmth all over his body.

“That you let me take you out on another date?”

Wille bites his bottom lip, rolling it between his teeth in a delicious way while waiting for Simon’s response,

He lets the question linger between them. Wille is so naturally sexy, vulnerable and charming in a way that drives Simon crazy. Unwilling to let him second guess his own intention, Simon responds,

“Deal…But Wille?”

A satisfied smile spreads between both men,

“Just so you know, I’m trying to make this date last as longggg as possible”

Simon kisses up his neck to his jaw, finding his smiling lips in the process.

Chapter Text

Wille

Wille focuses on the environment around him to keep his nervous system at bay. The hot bath water, cooling as the minutes pass. The bubbles, singing their rally cry as they disappear. The hand he’s holding, Simon’s hand. He can tell, just from his hands, that Simon’s a musician. His long, delicate fingers, soft despite their calluses give him away.

Simon sits comfortably next to Wille on the bathroom floor, adjusting his position every so often without complaint.

Simon hums in the space between them and Wille feels like he might just start crying all over again. The sound is painfully beautiful, gentle; second nature if he had to guess. Wille joins in on the melody and allows their soft voices to echo in the small, tiled room.

Wille breaks the silence first, aware of his own lukewarm bath water and goosebumps forming on Simon’s arms,

“You’re cold”

He points to the goosebumps on Simon’s arm as evidence, unwilling for Simon to indulge him in an argument. He begins draining the tub before kindly but firmly declaring,

“It’s your turn, Simon.”

Recognizing his reluctance Wille insists,

“I need to get up and stretch my legs anyway. They don’t make these tubs nearly big enough. Plus, if I don’t get out soon, I’ll turn into a prune.”

The joke feels slightly forced, only because he is still contemplating how he wants to talk to Simon about everything. Simon deserves an explanation for Wille’s panic attack given how severe and public it was. Especially since Simon was so brave last night sharing his feelings and insecurities with Wille. He wants to be brave too. Wille also knows that if he wants their relationship to grow into something deeper, which he does, he needs to trust Simon and open up to him.

Simon grabs a towel from the rack nearby and wraps it around Wille, giving him a big hug as he whispers,

“A very cute prune”

Even at his worst, Simon manages to make him feel so special. He knows he likely looks rough, but the sweet man beside him gives no such indication.

Wille squeezes him tight, nuzzling his damp hair into the crook of Simon’s neck, hoping his gratitude is felt in the way he refuses to let go until the drain loudly sips the last few drops of his bubble bath.

“I’m going to get dressed while you shower, okay?”

Simon nods in agreement and his warm, concerned eyes follow Wille as makes his exit towards the bedroom.

Wille goes through the motions of his after-shower routine, applying lotion and dressing for comfort while Simon showers.

He retrieves the smallest pair of sweats he can find and a cozy top to pair. He sets the folded fresh clothes next to him while he rehearses what he wants to say.

Simon doesn’t give him long to second guess himself, arriving quickly, looking ridiculously handsome with a towel tied around his waist and wet curls gracing his flush face. God, he looks so fucking good.

Wille can’t allow stray thoughts, however delightful, to take hold and distract him from what he needs to do. He needs to talk with Simon about this morning. To his relief, Simon dresses swiftly in the clothes he laid out, still utterly adorable but less distracting.

Wille pats the spot beside him on the bed, urging the handsome man to join him.

Before he loses courage, Wille starts,

“Erik, my brother, died in a car accident.”

He allows Simon to take in the information, making the connection before he continues,

“At first, I just wanted to disassociate completely. Self-destruct under the guise of a grief stricken, deeply tormented rich kid. Typical elitist bullshit where I had plenty of money and easy access to drugs. I started self-medicating because I didn’t know what else to do. And honestly, my circle of friends and family didn’t know how to have a real fucking conversation with me about how I was feeling so they just let me self-destruct.

I started having panic attacks every day, multiple times per day. I felt like I was dying. The adrenaline rush and subsequent crash felt like I was stuck on a rollercoaster that I couldn’t get off of. I had had panic attacks before, but they were never this severe… and Erik had always been there. He was my safe space. I was the black sheep of our entire social circle, but with Erik, I was just Wille. Fast forward, I was completely alone, grieving this tremendous loss, self-medicating, and spiraling.

At first, running was just a way to build up my walls. A way of proving to the rest of the world, ‘I’m fine. Sure, I’m partying until four in the morning. Sure, I’m mixing pills and booze. Sure, I’m going home with strangers. Sure, I’m unraveling internally… but I am getting up and running every morning so don’t question my functionality.’ It was a way to justify my actions and avoid the reality that I was very much not okay. But somewhere along the line, I started liking running. It became a healthy outlet as I started therapy.”

The words pour out of him, a monologue he needs to finish,

“All in all, despite doing a lot of work internally, I still have a lot of anxiety about cars and driving. I’ve graduated to using public transit which has felt like a big step in the right direction. Logically, I know that cars aren’t inherently dangerous. Like, I know that Erik’s death wasn’t because of the car but seeing an accident like that. It’s just too much.”

Simon turns on the bed and wraps his arms around Wille. The position is awkward at first but the two melt into one another, contorting their bodies in a way that feels custom built.

Simon places a hand in Wille’s damp hair and strokes the back of his head,

“I am so sorry, Wille. I am so, so sorry. I can’t imagine going through what you have. Grief is so complicated, and you need to know, you’ve done nothing wrong. You’re doing the best you can in the circumstances you are in and that’s fucking brave. You are so strong…”

Simon squeezes Wille extra close, placing fierce but gentle kisses in his hair before continuing,

“…and you are not alone anymore. You have me now.”

The words do something to Wille, deep in his core, pulling at invisible heart strings, opening the floodgates with sobs he didn’t realize he was holding back.

That’s what it comes down to, isn’t it? It’s not about the trauma of the accident or the ongoing panic attacks or the strained relationship with his family; it’s about managing it all alone.

Wille lets the tears fall, shaking at the tender care he feels under Simon’s tight embrace. Wille allows himself to relax into his grip, being soothed by the gentle tickles Simon draws on his back and shoulders.

Wille whispers,

“Thank you, Simon”

With the utmost sincerity and his usual charm, Simon responds warmly,

“No thanks necessary, pretty boy.”

A quiet chuckle bubbles, turning into a rolling boil of laughter between the two of them. Wille allows the release to consume him, head throwback meanwhile Simon collapses forward into his lap. When Wille finally sucks in enough air to form a retort,

“I’m never going to live that nickname down, am I?”

He feels lighter, joy returning with each inside joke they exchange despite the heaviness of their conversation.

“I’m afraid not…”

Simon starts, mischievous smile showing his sharp K-9 teeth in a brilliant smile,

“…especially not when you look this cute after a panic attack.”

Wille can’t help but scoff at the suggestion, another booming laugh escaping between them.

Simon leads lighthearted conversation, pulling Wille out of his post anxiety attack funk with gentle confidence.

***

Simon’s grumbling stomach coaxes them out of the bedroom to Wille’s stark kitchen that Simon teased about merely 14 hours earlier.

“Oh my gosh, I forgot that your kitchen is embarrassingly empty, Wille”

Wille lets an eye rolling escape before snuggling in behind Simon and wrapping his arms around his waist. He holds him tight,

“I guess I wasn’t expecting any company…”

Wille watches as goosebumps litter his neck and Simon shivers at the unexpected contact. He lets his head fall back and his neck looks like communion, an offering that could save him from all of the dark in this world. Wille notes that he’d still be religious if this is what his Sunday looked like.

Simon calls his bluff,

“Oh, you weren’t, huh? So, your apartment is always this clean then?”

Wille can’t help but smile, caught. Simon’s beautiful dark eyes meet his gaze, and he admits,

“…well, not always this clean.”

He tickles Simon’s waist, breaking the silence with their fits of laughter, while they wrestle for the upper hand.

Simon looks up at Wille as he nervously offers,

“Door dash, then?”

Quickly following it up with an ‘out’ in case Simon needs some space,

“…Unless you need to get home.”

Wille tries to act nonchalant, waiting for Simon’s reply with eager eyes. To his delight and surprise, Simon responds by pulling him close; plump lips and soft skin skimming his ear,

“Door dash…”

Pausing to build his anticipation,

“…but only if you, ‘let your boyfriend pay, honey’”

The sensation is heavenly, making his insides warm and gooey. He shines his armor and replies with fake exasperation, secretly delighted by their growing number of inside jokes,

“Finneee…Under one condition?”

Simon chuckles into the limited space between them, placing gentle kisses on his neck as Wille argues his case. Simon responds with coy curiosity,

“And that is?”

Wille wants to shoot his shot; to see if Simon actually wants to see him again or if he is simply lingering out of the kindness of his heart,

“That you let me take you out on another date?”

Wille bites his bottom lip, rolling it between his teeth, anxious but eager for a response. He searches Simon’s eyes for an inkling of doubt or hesitation, but Simon doesn’t indulge his anxiety, quickly responding,

“Deal…But Wille? Just so you know, I’m trying to make this date last as longggg as possible”

Simon kisses up his neck to his jaw, finding Wille’s smiling lips in a kiss that makes them both forget about ordering takeout.

Chapter Text

The remainder of the day passes in a blur of sweet kisses and quiet confessions between take out and a slow sensual shower. Wille and Simon talk about everything and nothing, for hours on end. Having both revealed their humanity, the flood gates of vulnerability open, honest conversation flows naturally, without judgement.

Simon is uncharacteristically open with Wille. In most relationships, whether romantic or platonic, Simon plays his cards very close to his chest, reluctant to share any vulnerabilities as a mechanism of self-preservation. He has lived enough to see how long it takes for deep, emotional wounds to heal. It is a difficult balance to strike with trust; giving someone the weapon to kill you and hoping they protect you instead.

Simon recounts his childhood and complex family dynamics to the most understanding eyes. Wille proves to be an attentive ear, listening earnestly and emotively. He is never quick to respond, contemplative and thoughtful but assured when words emerge. Simon learns that their slow flow of conversation is reflective of Wille’s own anxiety regarding saying the wrong thing. Writing is his favorite form of prose, allowing him time and space to form words in a way that he can be assured he won’t hurt anyone. Wille is such a gentle soul whose resilience is evident in his quiet persistence.

Simon starts peeling back the layers of his handsome Wille. He learns about his own complex family; elitist and privileged folks who never nurtured their unique son, making him feel like an outcast in his own home. He learns about the weight that Erik’s death has on his own life path in terms of career expectations. He learns about his routines, hobbies, and preferences. It is the kind of wholesome vulnerability one only sees with children who share their truths with no fear of reprimand.

They exist in this bubble of curiosity, passion, and bliss until their minds and bodies are thoroughly and gleefully exhausted.

Simon nearly cancels his Sunday night family face time call in lieu of another hour in Wille’s arms but his lover vehemently refuses; encouraging him to take the call given it is Linda’s birthday this week.

They exchange a deliciously heated goodbye kiss against the back of Wille’s door before he re-enters the world with a coy wave and reusable bag with his date night outfit in toe. Wille looks relaxed, leaning against the entryway; hands in his pockets and eyes challenging Simon to leave or come back, he can’t tell. Against his better judgement, Simon walks down the hallway, starting his trek back to his apartment.

For the first time in what feels like forever, Simon actually reads his notifications, responding to messages one by one. Most noteworthy however, are the 67 messages from his group chat with Rosh, Ayub, and Damon entitled: besfrenz4lyfe

[67 New Messages]

Rosh: we gaming tonight or nah?

Ayub: ☝🏽

Damon: I’m down but our boy Simon is otherwise preoccupied

Rosh: what could be more important that gaming with us?

Ayub: fr

Ayub: preoccupied with….?

Damon: You mean WHO

Damon: 😈🍆💦

Rosh: the fuck???? SIMMMONNN

Rosh: @Simon, explain yourself

Ayub: BROOOO

Ayub: When a man loves another man very much, they….
Ayub: 😏
Ayub: 🤣

Damon: ☠️

Damon: Depending how the date goes, I don’t think he will be available to game until Sunday night

Damon: BUT IM AVAILABLE BITCHES

Rosh: okay Damon we get it, you want to hang with us

Rosh: for real @Simon you owe us an explanation

Ayub: and a pizza!!!

Damon: If Simon comes home pregnant, what are we gonna name the kid?

Ayub: LMAO 😆😆😆

Rosh: he will name it ‘Rosh’ to get back into my good graces after failing to tell us about this date

The conversation continues with increasingly graphic messages and emojis. From what Simon gathers, they did end up gaming and Rosh won, per usual.

Simon emerges from the depths, into the group chat with vigor:

***

Simon: y’all are ruuuuuddddeee

Simon: first of all

Simon: i’m not pregnant

Simon: …and neither is he

Simon: 😏

Damon: Okayyyyy verssss we see you

Damon: I always pegged (ha ha) you as a bratty bottom but this is a fun little twist

Ayub: 🙉

Ayub: please keep the dirty details out of this chat and lets fucking game bro @simon

Damon: Are you coming home to tell me all the dirty details? @simon

Rosh: first of all, don’t listen to @ayub I want all of the dirty details

Rosh: but it can be over pizza at your place

Damon: Yay!

Damon: Simon’s treat

Damon: 😉

Simon: okay just give me an hour or so? I have my weekly ft with the fam at 4:00pm

Ayub: bet, see you soon

Ayub: tell momma Linda her favorite of Simon’s friends says hi

Rosh: FUCK OFF @ayub

Ayub: guys, @Rosh just threw a throw pillow at me from the other side of the couch

Rosh: tattletale

Simon: be careful @ayub or else you’ll be walking over here 😉

Damon: See you soon babes!

***

The FaceTime loaded, pixelated at first, improving as their internet connection became stable. Sara was visiting Mom for the weekend, so it is just two screens. Linda is excited, hiding her fatigue after working a double at the hospital until 11:00pm. The time difference is difficult but fortunately, their whole family is night owls. Simon often wonders if it is because Linda always worked second and third shift or if it was something in their biochemical make up? Either way, everyone always made a concerted effort to call, no matter the time.

Simon listens intently as Linda talks about work and the census that required her to work a grueling 16-hour shift while Sara shares fun tidbits of her weekend home. The conversation is in comfortable, quick Spanish which is always welcome; a break from the thought required when he is translating in real time. Sara, ever observant, points out, that he is being quiet, scanning him through the screen with piercing eyes and a determined look. Simon responds quickly that he is just tired from a busy weekend, curating an alibi for his persistent sister as the words leave his mouth, worried she might push the matter.

In that moment he receives a text from Sara who is on the screen in front of him, discreetly tugging at her earlobe, a signal they made up as kids to warn the other of something. He reads the text to try and understand what she might be getting at since they were not talking about any hot button issues…

[2 New Messages]:

Sara: You have a hickey on your neck

Sara: I don’t think mom noticed but just wanted to warn you

Simon can feel the heat blooming from his chest to his cheeks, liking her message as he recovers, redirecting the conversation in hopes that Linda’s fatigue will trump her typically exceptional observational skills. Simon talks about school and his upcoming concert, sharing his little life updates sans the most obvious… Wille.

He will save that for a time when he doesn’t have a painfully obvious hickey and Linda isn’t sleepwalking after such a long day. They end the call with virtual hugs and kisses.

[2 New Messages]:

Sara: You owe me for warning you

Sara: … but also when do I get to hear about him?

Simon smiles at his inquisitive sister with her candor. He always loves her blunt honesty, it feels so refreshing.

Simon: thank you

Simon: you’re the best

Simon: i literally didn’t even know i had it

Simon: maybe later this week?

[Sent]
[Delivered]

[1 New Message]

Sara: Okay. Looking forward to it.

He chuckles at a message that could otherwise appear sarcastic, the tone difficult to read millions of miles apart, but he knows Sara. He knows that she is genuinely excited and curious.

Simon: kk. love you sar.

[Sent]
[Delivered]

[1 New Message]

Sara: You too, Simon ❤️

Simon takes out his AirPods and orders pizza delivery for their apartment, eager to appease his friends who would soon be over and… fuckk they are never going to let him live down this hickey.

***

Simon is greeted by an all-knowing Damon who looks fairly self-satisfied as his eyes take in Simon, wearing Wille’s clothes, hauling a reusable bag of the date outfit his roommate helped him pick out. Simon watches as the gears turn; Damon, no doubt, deciding which question to ask first.

Simon can’t help the goofy smile he’s sporting as the men exchange a knowing, giddy glance. Damon pats the spot next to him on the couch, mimicking Simon’s gesture from the day before,

“Dish…”

Damon took an exaggerated breath before continuing,

“Simon, I want to know everything. Size, cut, positions, kinks, everything”

The crudeness of the line of question made Simon nearly double over in laughter as he made his way toward their couch.

“You are out of control”

Simon manages through forced breaths.

“You love it”

Damon responds easily, a twinkle in his eye knowing he is right.

“Can we at least wait until Rosh and Ayub are here, so I don’t have to repeat it twice?”

Damon gives an exasperated sigh,

“Finnnneee”

Exaggerating each syllable to reinforce his annoyance. A doorbell chimes, interrupting their spat and announcing the arrival of the pizza. Simon jumps to attention, retrieving the boxes from their lobby only to find Rosh and Ayub intercepting the pizza from the delivery man.

Simon exchanges niceties with stranger while motioning for his friends to continue on to his apartment. Ayub walks leisurely through the hallway, holding the pizza like proud child helping their parent while Rosh ushers them all to ‘hurry up’.

Once inside, Simon gathers plates and napkins for the group to enjoy their dinner, feigning nonchalance despite the current of electricity buzzing under every inch of skin that Wille touched. He can’t help how giddy he feels. Everyone gathers around the table, eyeing the man as he opens the box. Rosh is the first to speak,

“Oh fuck…”

She is eyeing him up and down, exchanging a look with Ayub, their own little language after decades of knowing one another. She continues,

“You really like him!”

Simon wishes he could wipe the smug smile off of her face as she raises her eyebrows and juts out her head, awaiting an answer to a question that is obvious given his silence.

She gestures grabby hands to both Ayub and Damon,

“Pay up.”

The two men groan, chuckling in the process while Simon gives everyone a curious gaze. He is so lost. What are they paying for? What was the…

The realization dawns on him like a plane touching down,

“You bet on me??”

Simon clarifies, curious, while Rosh chuckles,

“Like taking candy from a baby.”

She continues,

“When we gamed last night, we made a little bet about your… date.”

She is wearing a shit eating grin that splits her face in two, beautiful smile on full display as she explains,

“…whether it was just a fun sexscapade or if you were going to catch feelings. I explained to these two hooligans that you have only spent the night at someone else’s house once before, so if you were not home by midnight, Cinderella found herself a Prince Charming. They insisted that you probably just got tired and slept there, which is the most ridiculous suggestion ever because since when have you stayed over at a hook ups house? Ever?? Sweet, sweet, summer children, who obviously don’t know their friend at all.”

Rosh bats her dark eyelashes,

“The point is that I know you best and I won.”

Matter of fact with an obvious air of teasing, the two men try to argue with mumbled excuses. Rosh shushes them with confidence, picking up a slice of pizza before motioning to Simon,

“So does Prince Charming have a name?”

Now it is Simon who can’t help the smile and blush taking over his typically measured features,

“Wilhelm, Wille”

“Wilhelm? He is SWEDISH???”

Satisfied to have the upper hand in this conversation, Simon nods with a cheeky smile at his friends who are stunned silent. Ayub is shaking his head in disbelief meanwhile Rosh is picking her jaw up off the floor. Damon, having known this in advance is chuckling at the two as they process the information. Rosh gestures wildly,

“Simon, start at the beginning…”

The remainder of the evening is spent recounting the best date he has ever had with his friends who are completely enamored at this mystery man who has suddenly captured their best friends’ heart.

Chapter Text

Wille feels enveloped in a dream he never wants to wake from; spending the day exchanging slow kisses, close cuddles, and sacred secrets with Simon. His panic attack turned honesty hour opened the floodgates of vulnerability between the two men.

Wille aims to be authentic in his day-to-day life, which looks like wearing his heart on his sleeve. While he spent years avoiding doing just that, to maintain appearances for a social circle he had no desire to be a part of, he no longer subscribes to that practice. He allows difficult truths to pour out, a window into his soul that he can only hope Simon sees beauty in.

Wille mostly listens, thirsty for knowledge about the man in front of him who is traditionally guarded, for good reason. He learns about Simon’s childhood and the complexities of his intersectional identities being a person of color, immigrant, working class, and queer. He practices patience in each response, aiming to absorb the information Simon carefully divulges, giving him the thoughtful consideration he deserves.

They play their own version of twenty questions; learning routines, habits, preferences, and hobbies as they lay intertwined. They do so eagerly, throwing self-consciousness and caution to the wind.

Wille feels excited that Simon appears as annoyingly giddy as him. When Simon suggests skipping his family FaceTime to lounge a bit longer, it takes everything in his willpower to refuse the offer. Wille has minimal self-restraint but uses every ounce of it to wave goodbye after the most delicious goodbye kiss that leaves him hot and wanting. Will is learning that Simon seems to have that effect on him, yearning far deeper than a primary school crush.

As the door closes and Wille watches Simon Walk away in his clothes, kiss bitten and radiant against the gloom that looms just outside.

Sunday blues are pushed to the side with remnants of Simon scattered across his apartment, evidence of the most glorious first date he has ever had. He is further excited at the prospect of another date so soon. Simon impressed him with his choice of bar, so the pressure is on to find something equally unique and cool.

Wille picks up his phone, digesting the notifications as they appear and responding in time. He shoots Felice a text. He knows that they have their weekly date tomorrow and he has already derailed their routine once this week… but he just needs to tell someone about the last 36 hours.

Wille: Hey Fel, I forget if you are working today but I just wanted to let you know I had my date with Simon and it went well… Like really, really well.

[Sent]
[Delivered]

The message hardly sat for a minute before being read. Bubbles emerge and disappear as Felice rapid-fire responds.

[6 New Messages]

Felice: omg

Felice: okay… hate to be that bitch but

Felice: i told you so

Felice: ugh wille, i am so happy for you

Felice: when i didn’t get a drunk text in the middle of the night Saturday i had a good feeling

Felice: im getting ready for another shift but i have an entire subway ride to text so, spill

Wille can’t help the grin on his face as he reads Felice’s messages. He can hear her tone of voice, the reassuring squeal and excitement that’s evident from her rosy cheeks all the way to her smiling eyes.

Wille: Okay, be patient because it’ll take a second to write it all out…

[Sent]
[Delivered]
[Read @ 16:14]

Wille: Simon chose the bar and it was the coolest, moody little hole in the wall place in the middle of the gayborhood in Seattle. Simon looked fucking phenomenal-like so fucking hot that it’s a miracle we made it back to my place before we kissed. The conversation flowed so easily. It was nice because we have the Swedish thing in common, so we have that shared life experience, but it was literally so easy to talk to him. He is smart and funny and witty and genuine and extremely down to earth while still being confident. So, yeah, we were talking movies and I learned he had literally never seen Sleepless in Seattle which feels like a war crime given he has lived her for years and it’s a classic. So, I suggested that we go back to my place and watch it. But on the way, we stopped at this Venezuelan place that Simon frequents and picked up some food for the movie and holy shit Felice his voice… I mean its sexy in Swedish and English but when he switched into fluent Spanish, I almost fucking drooled. Anyways once we got back to my place, he was browsing my record collection and one thing led to another….. yeah. So, I had the best orgasm of my entire life. Like top fucking tier. And when we were cleaning up afterwards Simon got a little emotional which was like so fucking sweet and also hot? Like I think I am turned on by emotional connection because it sealed the deal for being such a sweet evening. We did end up watching Sleepless in Seattle, snuggled on the couch, eating our takeout. And I asked if he wanted to spend the night, and he did so we literally had the most lovely, domestic evening. And when I woke up in the morning, I went for my usual run and then once Simon was awake, he found me stretching in the living room and then he fucked me on the living room floor, and it was literally the hottest sex of my life. Like each orgasm with him I think, ‘nothing is going to top this’ and then it does. So afterward, we go and find a cute little coffee shop, and this is where it gets a little crazy…

[Sent]
[Delivered]
[Read @ 16:24]

Felice’s texts pour in as he continues typing,

[2 New Messages]

Felice: …………..

Felice: OMG I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY BUT FINISH THE CLIFFHANGER PLZ & TY

Wille: So, we were literally having our cute little coffee date, and a fucking car crash happens right outside our window and we see the entire thing. So naturally, I have a full-blown panic attack in the bathroom of the coffee shop. Like Felice it was bad bad. Like it was 2017 bad. And Simon followed me into the bathroom and put cool paper towels on my neck and held my hair while I puked and did breathing exercises with me until I could stand up again. And then he half carried me home because I couldn’t get in a car obviously, but it was pouring rain, and he didn’t hesitate. He just half carried me home in the pouring rain without knowing anything about why I was having a panic attack. And then once we got back to my place, he drew me a bath and stayed with me until I had worked through the initial shock, holding my hand and reassuring me. Like he literally sat on my bathroom floor, soaked to the bone, holding my hand for god knows how long while I cried in the bathtub. And once I started feeling like myself again, I got ready while Simon showered and once, he came back into the room I told him everything. I told him everything about Erik and what happened after and he didn’t flinch or judge, he just held me and told me how proud he was of me. He didn’t run away or attempt to make light of it. He just stayed by my side, and we spent the rest of the day talking and snuggling and kissing and HE SAID YES TO ANOTHER DATE WITH ME EVEN THOUGH I LITERALLY FREAKED THE FUCK OUT. So yeah, that about sums it up.

[Sent]
[Delivered]
[Read @ 16:31]

It doesn’t take long for Felice to respond, the fastest reader and texter Wille knows,

[3 New Messages]

Felice: holy cow

Felice: that’s so much to process

Felice: first off, are you okay now? like it sounds like you are, but I just want to check first🤍

Warmth spreads in Wille’s chest at his best friend, one of the most genuinely kind people he has ever met.

Wille: Yes, I am feeling much better now. Plus, I have therapy tomorrow so that will be nice as well.

[Sent]
[Delivered]
[Read @ 16:33]

Wille watches his screen as iMessage bubbles taunt him with Felice’s response.

[6 New Messages]

Felice: well as your best friend, i must say i am quite impressed with Simon. the fact that he was so kind and nurturing to you in such a vulnerable moment says a lot about his character.

Felice: ummm i am also obsessed with the fact that you two are equally pining and lovesick for one another. like you two could have both pulled away and parted amicably multiple times when vulnerabilities bubbled up but instead you both leaned into it which is like, so cool.

Felice: and a round of applause for the best sex ever to top off an amazing emotional connection

Felice: babe, i’m so happy for you.

Felice: you deserve this, and it makes me so happy to see you so happy

Felice: why do i feel like a proud mom?????

Wille smiles as he reads, Felice’s warmth reaches through the phone, wrapping Wille in a virtual hug as the words fill him with gratitude. How did he get so lucky? He feels emotion well behind his eyes, threatening to overflow, this time with joy.

Wille: Probably because you are the kind of Mom I always needed🥹

Wille: Lucky for me, I got you in best friend form. It’s like a proud mom but way cooler.

Wille: But seriously Felice, thank you for listening. I couldn’t wait a whole other day to tell you. I love you❤️

[Sent]
[Delivered]
[Read @ 16:39]

Wille can’t help but smile having shared his exciting news. He knows that her commute is nearly up, but he revels in the fact that they have their standing virtual coffee date tomorrow.

[2 New Messages]

Felice: just getting to work and im going to have to fix my makeup, tearing up at sweet texts like that😭😭

Felice: love you Wille, can’t wait to talk more tomorrow 🤍call if you need anything kk love?

The emotions of the day linger on the back of Wille’s mind. Motivated by the beauty of it all, he retrieves his notebook from his bedside table and settles into his couch, putting on an old frank ocean album to serve as background music while he writes.

The easy listening r&b mixed with the storm outside are the perfect backdrop as his thoughts fill the pages.

Chapter Text

The long weekend is welcome, allowing him an extra day together organized before the school week begins. The weather pattern hovers over the Pacific Northwest, blanketing the region in the low cloud cover and misty rain it’s known for.

Tuesday morning presents Simon with a new challenge that he hadn’t considered previously; seeing Wille at school. He has never dated a colleague before, so this was new territory to navigate.

Simon wakes up to a sweaty selfie from Wille, captioned;

‘Kind of rude that you’re not here to be insanely hot after my morning run. I liked stretching with you way better.’

Simon can’t help the goofy, giddy grin that spreads at Wille’s flirtatious morning text.

He responds in like,

‘I couldn’t agree more, I might actually start working out if it was like that every time 😏’

[Sent]
[Delivered]

***

Simon honors his typical weekday routine with an extra pep in his step, smiling to himself as he gets ready for the workday and starts his morning commute. Damon is already at cafe Ladro this morning, giving him knowing googly eyes as he pulls espresso shots for his Americano.

“If I had the weekend you did, I’d need two of these.”

Damon gives Simon a coy smile from over the coffee bar, bubbly and effervescent despite the early hour.

Simon fights a yawn, too proud to prove Damon right so quickly after his sassy comment.

His eye roll is involuntary, but he reciprocates his smile just the same.

“Also, the team is going out for drinks tonight after practice so don’t wait up for me!”

Damon’s eyes twinkle with a levity and lightness that Simon envies. While Simon doesn’t consider himself a negative person, he knows that his reserved attitude and contemplative nature come off considerably differently than his roommate.

“Good to know! I hope the weather lightens up for you all but I’m sure I’ll see you later.”

Damon responds in quick banter,

“Oh honey, the only thing that can stop these queens from playing soccer is a surprise Mariah Carey tribute concert.”

Damon adds a wink for good measure while Simon grabs his hot Americano from the larger-than-life man.

Feeling uncharacteristically chipper for the early morning hour, Simon quips,

“Bye love, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

Damon flashes him a wide toothed grin as he waves goodbye.

Simon opens his daylist to listen to ‘neo soul modern r&b Tuesday early morning’ which starts him off strong with Syrup Sandwiches by Cordae and Joey Bada$$. He listens to the young rapper’s release and walks to its easy beat. The songs rotate through until he is standing at the front stoop of Garfield High, ready to begin his day.

Simon shakes off the mist from his rain jacket shell and stomps his feet on the entryway rug in hopes that his shoes don’t squeak the remainder of the morning.

He is surprised to find both Wille and Jacob in his classroom, talking like old friends. Simon tries to maintain his composure as he sets down his belongings and looks between the two.

Wille intercepts Simon’s train of thought with a sweet explanation,

“I just thought you could use some coffee this morning, so I stopped by to leave it for you, when I ran into Jacob.”

Jacob nods in agreement, harnessing his obvious delight with a reluctance that tells Simon he has some serious explaining to do. He can’t help the blush that emerges as he accepts the to go coffee cup from Wille. His cheeks hurt from smiling and it isn’t even 7:30am yet! Jacob offers them privacy, excusing himself to grade; no doubt a bullshit excuse but a welcomed one at that. Simon shouts behind him,

“I can’t wait to hear all about the gingerbread houses later!”

Jacob agrees with a polite warmth that suggests that gingerbread houses are the last thing they will be talking about once they are alone.

“Same, I can’t wait to hear about your weekend too!”

The words hang in the air and Jacob’s smug smile makes Simon smile and shake his head. Returning to the moment in front of him, Simon states the obvious,

“You brought me coffee?”

The question makes the handsome man blush a deep pink that no doubt, extends down his neck and across his chest.

Wille responds with confidence,

“Well, I figure I owe you one after we had to abandon our drinks during my little breakdown Sunday.”

Wille’s voice was hopeful, if not slightly shy at the recollection of the aforementioned panic attack. Simon sees a sliver of self-consciousness shine through and he immediately works to tamper any insecurity Wille might have. Simon’s hand reaches for Wille’s, squeezing it in reassurance, a playful smirk painting his face.

“Oh Wille, the only reason you owe me coffee is because you’re so fucking hot that I barely slept all weekend.”

To further reinforce his point, Simon leans in and whispers,

“You have nothing to apologize for, Wille. I am really glad I could be there for you.”

The combination of sincerity with shameless flirting seems to do the trick as Wille smiles wide in response, relief obvious in the way his shoulders relax, and eyes brighten at the comment.

“Well, it meant a lot to me, Simon.”

“Likewise, Wille.”

After a comfortable pause, Simon continues,

“Are you free tonight?”

Wille nods eagerly, unabashedly.

“I am really itching for a home cooked meal. Did you want to come over and I’ll make us some dinner?”

Suddenly slightly shy, Simon continues,

“It can be casual, but I also totally understand if you’re not up for it.”

Wille interrupts his derailing train of thought,

“That would be amazing. I’d love to.”

The first bell rings overhead and while Simon has a free period to start, Wille gestures that he has to go, eyeing the exit as students flood the hallways,

“I’ll meet you here after school, then? Unless you want me to come over, later?…”

Adorably flustered by the passing bell, Wille punctuates their conversation,

“You know what, how about you just text me the plan, okay?”

Simon can’t help but nod, excited at the prospect of getting some alone time with Wille so soon. He sips on his freshly delivered coffee and can’t help the butterflies stirring as he waves goodbye and settles into the morning.

He takes a picture of the drink with Wille’s name scribbled on it and sends it in the group chat, well aware of the chaos about to erupt. He knows he’s being a menace, but he can’t help showing off to his friends.

***

The day passes with giddy anticipation of having Wille over to his apartment. Lunch with Jacob only amplifies his eagerness, as he explains, with far less detail than Rosh required, the events of the weekend.

“So when are you going to see each other again?”

Simon blushes at the question, aware of how desperate he probably seems to have invited Wille over so soon. Trepidation aside, Simon reluctantly admits,

“Errh, I actually invited him over for dinner tonight, since Damon has soccer.”

“Oh my god! You two are on your way to a proper love story at this rate!”

Jacob’s mouth hangs open, words pouring out in cluttered but quick succession, as he chews a bite of his turkey sandwich.

“I can’t believe it took me finding Wille in your classroom with a post hook up coffee, to learn that you two are an item!”

Simon rolls his eyes at his dear friend’s flair for the dramatic,

“Oh my god, you are out of control. It was one date. Besides, I don’t even know if that’s something he’d want. I don’t even know if he plans on staying in the US after his substitute teaching contract ends.”

Jacob’s face drops at the logistics clouding the storyline he’s creating. Ever the optimist, he pivots with confidence and reassurance,

“I don’t know Simon; I don’t think he would be putting in so much effort if he didn’t like like you.”

Jacob’s eyes are sincere, warm and reassuring in the way his brows cinch in the middle, determined to get his point across.

Simon appreciates the reassurance, but it spurs questions that he’s been avoiding in favor of enjoying the moment. Maybe tonight he can try to gauge what this is for Wille, what they are, if they have a future together…

***

Simon: Hey Wille, I don’t know how to ask this without sounding like we’re kids but…do you want to come over after school? Like walk home with me?

Simon: No pressure though if you’d rather come over later, closer to dinner time

Simon: I was going to make paprika chicken and potatoes tonight, but I wanted to check first to see if you have any allergies?

Simon: Sorry for the novel…. 🙃

[Sent]
[Delivered]

[3 New Messages]

Wille: I talked to my mom, and she said it’s okay as long as I make it home for curfew

Wille: Want to stop by my classroom after the final bell to pick me up, and we can walk together?

Wille: That sounds delicious- no allergies.

The anticipation builds as the day passes, the afternoon dragging as Simon eagerly awaits his evening with Wille. Each class period feels longer than the last, the students particularly antsy after a long weekend.

He smiles at Jacob’s intermittent teasing texts and knows that he needs to plan a time to give him the full download.

The 3:40pm bell rings and Simon tries to act casual, walking to Wille’s classroom. He can hear the music before he can even see the tall substitute. The beat and tune are familiar but he can’t place the song until he hears the lyrics;

“we haven't boat tripped we haven't argued
we're still learning each other
i don't know all of you
And you don't know all of me
how am i to live with?
that is not a good foundation to have kids with
or maybe it is, maybe it's not, just not yet
maybe this is a blessing in disguise and not a regret
look jane, it's your choice at the end of the day
just know i'll support either way, no pressure”

Simon knows it’s Tyler, the Creators newest album but he isn’t familiar enough with each song to distinguish which track it is.

He listens in the doorway, watching Wille who is lost in the music, bobbing his head and mumbling along to the rap while furiously rearranging papers and notebooks on his desk, searching for something, to no avail. He looks adorable distracted, sandy hair falling in his face and loose watch hitting the old desk. His rainbow lanyard dangles from his neck, holding his badge and highlighting his strong chest, hidden by his collared shirt. Simon can’t help but smile that he opts for a rainbow lanyard, another nod to the gentle strength of the man in front of him.

After a moment, Simon taps on the doorframe to announce his presence, effectively drawing Wille out of his little world.

Simon’s smile is met in like, as a smirk spreads across Wille’s face,

“How was I this time?”

Wille asks with levity, referencing when Simon interrupted Wille’s rap session post run on Sunday.

Simon matches the banter with fervor,

“Quite improved, if I do say so myself. You know far more lyrics to this song so it’s either a favorite or you’ve been practicing.”

Trying to flex his knowledge to impress his hip hop head, Simon offers,

“It’s Chromakopia, right?”

Wille nods.

“Best hip-hop album of the year, in my opinion.”

His smile is genuine, obviously excited to talk about it. Wille continues,

“Have you listened to it?”

He tunes his ear to Simon’s response while he gathers the remaining papers and books on his desk.

“A couple songs, but not cover to cover.”

Wille feigns disappointment, tsking Simon under his breath with a half-smile on his lips. Simon makes a mental note, assigning himself boyfriend homework to better understand the handsome man in front of him.

“Ready to go?”

The light in Wille’s eyes twinkle and he looks unreasonably handsome for someone standing in such horrible overhead lighting.

“Lead the way, Simon”

They walk in tandem, exchanging inconspicuous touches; brushing of the fingers and bumping of shoulders as the city sidewalk buzzes with a different kind of electricity.

They arrive to Simon’s apartment that is only slightly in disarray. He truly didn’t expect Wille to come over when he left this morning, so there are remnants of his rush to get to work on time; a cereal bowl on the counter, house slippers scattered, jackets laid out. He sets down his bag and keys, moving out of the foyer and into their open shared living space. Still shivering from the walk in the cool afternoon air, Simon puts on a fresh kettle while Wille takes in his space.

“Care for any tea?”

Simon asks, meeting Wille’s sweet gaze.

“Yes please!”

Wille responds quickly, setting down his own bag next to Simon’s before following him into the kitchen, stopping at each piece of art along the way, admiring the little pieces of Simon scattered throughout the apartment.

Wille leans against the kitchen counter across from Simon, awaiting the babbling appliance and fresh mugs that he’s carefully selecting from their ridiculously large collection.

“Your place is so cozy.”

Simon smiles at the compliment, taking in Wille’s warm eyes, increasingly amber with the afternoon light reflecting in them.

“Tack, Wille.”

Simon responds casually, previewing his teas before offering Wille the choice,

“Peppermint or lavender-chamomile?”

“Guess.”

Wille challenges, smiling at his own question,

Simon surprises himself with how quickly and confident he picks the lavender-chamomile box, holding it out proudly to the handsome gentleman standing in his kitchen. Raising his eyebrows, a silent question in conjunction with the smirk he’s wearing as their playful tone.

Wille laughs in response, smiling and nodding at Simon’s obviously correct guess.

“I guess I scream lavender, huh?”

Simon closes the gap between them, walking with confidence to the counter where Wille is standing, pulling him into a hug while they both chuckle.

Simon leans up onto his tip toes, lips grazing Wille’s soft neck as he moves his hands from his waist to their perch on his shoulders,

“You sure do. My lavender pretty boy.”

Simon whispers into the safe space behind Wille’s strong jaw, allowing himself to relax against the man who is holding him so deliciously tight at the waist. Simon goes rigid at the realization of what he said when Wille asks,

“Your?”

His voice is thick with curiosity and another emotion he can’t quite put his finger on. Simon is so embarrassed, eager to hide his beet red, blushing face at all costs. He drops his forehead onto Wille’s clavicle with an audible mix between a humph and a groan.

His anxiety is running rampant, conjuring up all sorts of worst-case scenarios about how he might have just ruined whatever it is they have with a slip of the tongue.

Simon can feel Wille’s right hand move from his waist, up his chest, finally arriving at his neck. Wille lifts his chin, ever so gently, so that Simon has no choice but to face Wille. The rush of anxious energy begins to dissipate as Wille’s warm eyes scan his own, obvious delight in the way they are crinkling at the edge. Wille finally breaks the aching silence that is gnawing at Simon’s core,

“I like the way that sounds…”

A shy smile turns into a beaming, toothy grin. Relief washes away the cold sweat that was forming and Simon instinctively plants a deep kiss on Wille’s lips.

The kiss is passionate, slow but deep with emotion carrying their shared breath away. All of Simon’s anxiety morphs into greedy anticipation at the thought of being together; partners, boyfriends, exclusive. The thought is so intoxicating that he nearly forgets about all unanswered questions he has, nearly.

Simon recruits every last ounce of self-control to stop their passionate, sensual kiss.

“Wait, Wille. Maybe we should talk about what that means for us…before we get carried away?”

Simon can’t help but smirk, knowing full well where such a kiss will lead them. Wille’s eyes are dark, pupils blown and dominating his iris like an eclipse. Ever polite, despite appearing totally gone, Wille responds,

“Of course. Maybe we can drink our tea and talk?”

Simon places a chaste kiss on Wille’s cheek before both men pick up their mug and wander to their well-loved living room couch.

Simon starts,

“So, I really like you, Wille. And I know that’s a lot to say because we still have so much to learn about one another, but it’s true. I want you. I want the opportunity to get to know you. Ultimately, I want to nurture whatever this relationship is so that it may grow into something beautiful. I want there to be an us but I’m also a little scared. I’m worried that you don’t feel the same; that it feels like too much, too fast, or too strong. And I’m also anxious about the logistics; how long are you in Seattle? Will you stay once your job ends? I don’t know, all of it.”

Simon has no time for a filter, the words pouring out of him as he puts his heart on the line for the gorgeous man listening with eager eyes.

Wille’s hand releases his mug onto the coffee table, finding Simon’s hand in the process, squeezing it in reassurance,

“Simon, babe. Simme.”

Wille smiles at the new nickname, waiting until Simon meets his gaze before continuing,

“I really like you, too. I want that. I want an ‘us. I don’t know about all of the logistics as much as I’d love to. I know I want to be in Seattle, I chose it with intention before I got this job. Right now, I feel confident in two things; I want to be here and I really want to be with you. I don’t know what my future looks like at Garfield or job wise in general but….”

Simon interrupts his running lips with a kiss that effectively silences Wille, who pulls him closer and quickly picks up where they left off moments ago; hungry for one another.

Chapter Text

The long weekend is delightful, much needed after such an emotionally intense weekend. Between the engaging conversation that left him giddy, the phenomenal sex that left him whole, and panic attack that left him processing; Wille is exhausted. The extra day of leisure is welcome.

Will returns to his running routine after a day off to rest his aching muscles. The run itself is on the right side of challenging, forcing him to channel residual anxiety into something productive.

Wille is nervous-excited to see Simon at school. He already strategizing ways that he can ramp up his flirtation and show Simon he’s interested. He starts with a sweaty selfie, captioned;

‘Kind of rude that you’re not here to be insanely hot after my morning run. I liked stretching with you way better.’

[Sent]
[Delivered]

Wille forces himself to set down his phone while he gets ready for the day, rushing through his still new, school routine so he can stop to get Simon a coffee before first period. When he glances at his phone as he’s heading out of his apartment, he notices;

[1 New Message]

I couldn’t agree more, I might actually start working out if it was like that every time 😏

Simon knows just how to tug at Wille’s heartstrings, making him feel deliciously desired…

***

Wille begins his morning commute with purpose, determined to stop for Simon’s coffee and deliver it before first period. He orders two beverages with a smug, self-satisfied smile that indicates his crush is rapidly growing into something too precious to be uttered out loud.

Wille arrives to Simon’s classroom, finding Simon’s friend Jacob waiting. It is obvious that Wille is inserting himself into a routine, one he is eager to learn. Wille smiles,

“Hey…. Jacob, right?”

The friendly face hides his surprise, recovering quickly from Wille’s disruption with practiced manners,

“Yes. It’s nice to see you again Wilhelm. How was your long weekend?”

Jacob smiles, glancing between the two cups of coffee with enough intuition to surmise the reason for such a delivery,

“Just brought Simon some coffee but…my weekend was fantastic. And yours?”

If deflection was a sport, Wille would be a professional athlete. Years of living in the socialite world has made him an expert in pivoting a conversation.

It’s not that Wille doesn’t want to tell Jacob about his date with Simon, he just isn’t sure it’s his place to do so since him and Simon appear to be so close.

Simon springs through the door, hurried yet looking as handsome as ever; dark curls slightly damp from the rain and jacket hiding a cozy looking turtleneck, to hide the love bites Wille left, no doubt. The man is looking delightfully surprised, smiling curiously looking between the two,

Wille intercepts Simon’s train of thought with a sweet explanation,

“I just thought you could use some coffee this morning, so I stopped by to leave it for you, when I ran into Jacob.”

Jacob nods in agreement, eyes focused on Simon with a glance that suggests that Jacob did not know about their date. The music teacher’s cheeks flush and the two friends exchange a knowingly glance before Jacob excuses himself to grade.

Simon shouts behind him,

“I can’t wait to hear all about the gingerbread houses later!”

Jacob hums an agreement with a polite warmth that suggests that gingerbread houses are the last thing they will be talking about once they are alone.

He responds in like,

“Same, I can’t wait to hear about your weekend too!”

The words hang in the air and Jacob’s smug smile makes Simon smile and shake his head. Simon looks frustratingly cute when he is flustered.

With privacy and a couple minutes before the day starts, Simon states the obvious,

“You brought me coffee?”

Wille can’t help his blush, wondering if he is being too much by delivering a coffee after one long, but completely incredible, date.

Wille does his best to maintain his air of confidence,

“Well, I figure I owe you one after we had to abandon our drinks during my little breakdown Sunday.”

He tries to remain matter of fact, hiding any lingering self-consciousness, knowing that Simon wouldn’t want him to be dwelling on such a moment.

Simon’s hand reaches for Wille’s, squeezing it in reassurance, a playful smirk painting his face.

“Oh Wille, the only reason you owe me coffee is because you’re so fucking hot that I barely slept all weekend.”

To further reinforce his point, Simon leans in and whispers,

“You have nothing to apologize for, Wille. I am really glad I could be there for you.”

Simon’s words melt any remaining insecurity, leaving him with a warm buzz that serves as a stark contrast to the weather outside. The reassurance combined with the playful flirting feels so right.

“Well, it meant a lot to me, Simon.”

“Likewise, Wille.”

After a comfortable pause, Simon continues,

“Are you free tonight?”

Wille can’t help his eagerness, nodding with reckless abandon as Simon continues,

“I am really itching for a home cooked meal. Did you want to come over and I’ll make us some dinner? It can be casual, but I also totally understand if you’re not up for it.”

Wille interrupts his backtracking with reassurance,

“That would be amazing. I’d love to.”

The first bell rings overhead and Wille is acutely aware that he has to get going; eyeing the exit as students flood the hallways,

“I’ll meet you here after school, then? Unless you want me to come over, later?…”

Increasingly flustered by the prospect of being late, Wille gives Simon the reigns,

“You know what, how about you just text me the plan, okay?”

With that, Wille enters the sea of sleepwalking teenagers, rushing to his classroom to avoid being late for a man whose presence is already making his cheeks sore from smiling this morning.

***

Wille’s day flies by in a flurry of music and poetry, having successfully arranged his lesson plan for introducing the topic in a way that won’t make his students loathe him on their first day together.

He opts for the newest Tyler, the Creator album, Chromokopia. Although he would have loved to use Kendrick’s Mr. Morales & the Big Steppers, the later album is much longer and a bit more explicit in both words and content.

He reluctantly works through lunch, with the knowledge that he’s seeing Simon later as motivation.

His phone alerts him to,

[4 New Messages]

Simon: Hey Wille, I don’t know how to ask this without sounding like we’re kids but…do you want to come over after school? Like walk home with me?

Simon: No pressure though if you’d rather come over later, closer to dinner time

Simon: I was going to make paprika chicken and potatoes tonight, but I wanted to check first to see if you have any allergies?

Simon: Sorry for the novel…. 🙃

The messages make Wille smile like a fool to an empty classroom. Simon is so thoughtful asking about any allergies too. His eagerness also reassures him that Simon is just as into this as he is. He knows they should probably talk about boundaries or logistics, but he’s too wrapped up in the fun of it for now.

Wille responds with banter,

Wille: I talked to my mom, and she said it’s okay as long as I make it home for curfew

Wille: Want to stop by my classroom after the final bell to pick me up, and we can walk together?

Wille: That sounds delicious- no allergies.

[Sent]
[Delivered]

The anticipation builds as the day passes. Wille texts Felice to give her the newest update, eager to share his giddiness with someone else. Fortunately, they spoke yesterday, and he was able to give her the full download of the weekend, but this is an added bonus feature.

The final work study period ends and Wille is enjoying the album in its entirety without students whispering in the background or giggling at cuss words and innuendos. He definitely got brownie points for his choice of introduction to poetry, so he is living on that high and the promise of an evening with Simon.

Hey Jane is playing and Wille is bobbing along to the soundtrack. It’s such an interesting piece with the back-and-forth dialogue and catchy cadence. He is struggling to find an outline he created and recognizes that Simon will likely be here any moment.

As if on cue, Simon taps on the doorframe to announce his presence, effectively drawing Wille out of his focus state.

Remembering the last time Simon interrupted his singing, Wille quips;

“How was I this time?”

Simon matches the banter with fervor,

“Quite improved, if I do say so myself. You know far more lyrics to this song so it’s either a favorite or you’ve been practicing.”

Simon is beaming with pride as he continues with a clarifying question,

“It’s Chromakopia, right?”

Wille nods.

“Best hip-hop album of the year, in my opinion.”

He can’t help his curiosity,

“Have you listened to it?”

Wille asks as he organizes and reorganizes the chaos that is his desk, eager to pack up and join his lover for a night together.

Wille chances a glance, meeting Simons eyes with warm intensity, awaiting an answer. Simon almost appears shy as he responds,

“A couple songs, but not cover to cover.”

Wille feigns disappointment, tsking Simon under his breath with a half-smile on his lips. Simon chuckles at the response before prompting,

“Ready to go?”

Finally ready, Wille meets Simon in the door frame, pointing to the exit at the end of the hallway;

“Lead the way, Simon”

They walk in tandem and Wille can’t help but indulge the casual touches on the busy sidewalk. He appreciates the electricity that every touch of the fingers and bump of the shoulders that jolts through him.

Wille follows Simon through an entryway into the coziest apartment. The space is neat but lived in with miscellaneous mugs scattered and shoes stacked near the doorway. Simon turns lamps on, bathing the room in a warm glow that feels quite the opposite from the slate grey sky outside.

Simon sets down his bag and keys, moving out of the foyer and into their open living space. Always shivering, his sweet host puts on a fresh kettle while Wille takes in the space.

“Care for any tea?”

Simon asks, meeting Wille’s sweet gaze.

“Yes, please!”

Wille responds quickly, setting down his own bag next to Simon’s before following him into the kitchen, stopping at each piece of art along the way, admiring the little pieces of Simon scattered throughout his shared apartment.

Wille leans against the kitchen counter across from Simon, awaiting the hot beverage and smiling as Simon choses their mugs out of a fairly large collection. Wille wonders how he decides which mugs to use every day.

Breaking the silence, Wille compliments the space,

“Your place is so cozy.”

Simon smiles, full; with bright, white teeth and beautifully plump lips that look pillowy soft,

“Tack, Wille.”

Simon continues his mission of warming them up by offering Wille,

“Peppermint or lavender-chamomile?”

With a witty smirk, Wille challenges,

“Guess.”

Simon meets his gaze, smiling as he picks up the lavender-chamomile box, holding it out proudly. He raises his eyebrows, confident and playful.

Wille can’t help the laugh that escapes his mouth, nodding in response before adding,

“I guess I scream lavender, huh?”

Simon closes the gap between them, pulling Wille into a hug while they both chuckle at the dual meaning.

Simon leans up onto his tip toes, and those plump lips graze his neck. Simon moves his hands from Wille’s waist to his shoulders,

“You sure do. My lavender pretty boy.”

Simon whispers the innocent phrase into the safe space behind Wille’s jaw. Wille can’t help but draw him closer at the waist, holding him even tighter as he processes what Simon just said,

“Your?”

Simon drops his forehead onto Wille’s clavicle with an audible mix between a humph and a groan, hiding his face despite Wille’s delight at the sweet phrase.

Wille refuses to allow Simon to hid of embarrassment when Wille is grinning ear to ear. He moves his hand from the man’s small waist, up to his chin, forcing eye contact as he responds,

“I like the way that sounds…”

Simon returns Wille’s enthusiasm with a slow and deep kiss that makes Wille melt into the shorter man’s arms, liquid honey. The hot, sensual kiss is interrupted with a gentle touch as Simon places a hand on Wille’s blushing chest.

“Wait, Wille. Maybe we should talk about what that means for us… before we get carried away?”

Wille can’t help but return Simon’s smirk, knowing exactly where a kiss like this will lead them. Ever polite, despite feeling totally distracted by the pull of Simon, Wille harnesses his desire and responds,

“Of course. Maybe we can drink our tea and talk?”

Simon places a chaste kiss on Wille’s cheek before both men pick up their mug and move to the comfortable living room couch.

Simon starts,

“So, I really like you, Wille. And I know that’s a lot to say because we still have so much to learn about one another, but it’s true. I want you. I want the opportunity to get to know you. Ultimately, I want to nurture whatever this relationship is so that it may grow into something beautiful. I want there to be an us but I’m also a little scared. I’m worried that you don’t feel the same; that it feels like too much, too fast, or too strong. And I’m also anxious about the logistics; how long are you in Seattle? Will you stay once your job ends? I don’t know, all of it.”

Wille’s heart swells at the candor with which Simon shares his feelings, laying all of his lingering questions out for Wille to consider.

He doesn’t have all the answers that Simon might want but desperate to reassure him, Wille reaches for the man’s free hand and squeezes it in reassurance,

“Simon, babe. Simme.”

Wille waits until Simon meets his gaze before continuing. He needs Simon to know how he feels, to reassure those deep brown eyes of his intension.

“I really like you, too. I want that. I want an ‘us. I don’t know about all of the logistics, as much as I’d love to. I know I want to be in Seattle, I chose it with intention before I got this job. Right now, I feel confident in two things; I want to be here, and I really want to be with you. I don’t know what my future looks like at Garfield or job wise in general but….”

Simon interrupts his train of thought with a silencing kiss. Understanding his response and eager to reciprocate, Wille pulls Simon ever closer and picks up where they had left off moments before.

Chapter Text

Wille’s reassurance seeps out of his amber eyes, answering his question with sincerity that makes him ache with gratitude. Longing tugs deep in his core as Wille’s words are memorized by Simon’s subconscious.

Longing takes the reins of his heart strings and Simon brings the two into a searing kiss. Simon needs his lips on Wille’s; to feel the soft push and pull as their lips dance together. Simon’s eager teeth can’t help to take a bite of his plump, lower lip. The soft drag elicits a quiet moan from Wille; the sound vibrating in the limited space between them.

Always eager to show his affection, Simon draws Wille closer, tangling his fingers in his hair, tugging at the roots gently as he licks into the man’s mouth. Wille returns the favor, large hands cupping his small waist, fingers searching the fabric for real estate to pull him even closer.

Simon groans as their chests meet, the closeness and pressure fanning the flame of longing.

Simon needs more of Wille’s skin, moving his hands down his clothed chest, only to pull his shirt free from his pants and place palms on Wille’s bare skin. He feels each ridge and fold of Wille’s front; constellations of freckles littering every hidden corner of Wille’s pale sky that only Simon gets to see.

The thought burns hot at the back of his throat, desire coursing through his veins; Wille is his. Not normally the jealous type, Simon is surprised by how much the thought has his cock half hard and heart beating out of his chest.

The sounds Wille makes only ramp him up more. Simon’s hands search the bare skin on the small of Wille’s back and his lover grinds in return. Simon continues his pursuit; needy and desperate.

“I want this off”

Simon pants between open mouth kisses, tugging on the fabric separating the two men.

Wille nods, groaning in return as he grabs the hem of his own shirt and flips it over his head. His hair is disheveled, and pupils blow as he stands, smiling wide at Simon, half naked in his living room.

Simon can feel his pulse point throbbing, heart in his throat and mouthwatering at the vision in front of him. His cock twitches inside his slacks and he no longer feels cold from the Seattle mist. His body is on fire, prickling with anticipation.

Simon returns Wille’s grin, smirking as he begins to lift his own shirt, intentionally slowly. He knows that he’s being a tease, but he is determined to draw this pleasure out as long as possible. He watches Wille’s gaze follow Simon’s hands, eyeing the sliver of skin showing as he scrunches the hem of his turtleneck. He slowly lifts it to just above his navel, watching Wille’s eyes follow the fabric up his abdomen, until he drops it again. Simon can’t help his smirk as Wille’s eyes shoot up to his own, desire pooling in his blood shot pupils,

“Tease”

Wille mutters before reaching out to grab a fistful of fabric and pull Simon in, kissing him with hot, desperate neediness that makes Simon feel so utterly desired.

Simon places one hand over Wille’s shoulder and the other on his chest; dragging his fingers down the man’s front, feather light touch until he reaches the bulge in Wille’s pants. Simon cups Wille’s erection over the thin fabric before using his other hand to stroke the soft skin on his neck above his shoulder.

Simon leans in, mustering all remaining sense of composure as he whispers,

“I’ll show you a tease…”

Smiling into the man’s neck as he places a chaste kiss by his ear before taking both hands off Wille’s body. Wille meets his gaze quickly, slack jaw and watering at the mouth.

Simon takes a step back but not before reaching a handout to lead Wille to his bedroom. Wille has the cutest look on his face, lust and giddiness wrapped into a smirk that bridges both emotions.

Simon can’t help his smile as Wille follows him. Ever observant, Wille looks around the space and takes into the new environment while Simon shuts the door behind them.

Simon takes the opportunity to hug Wille from behind, wrapping his arms around the taller man’s waist and holding him tight. Wille allows his head to fall back, while Simon’s hand explore the man’s body. Fingers leaving ticklish paths as he traces invisible roads between freckles. He holds his right hand firmly below Wille’s navel, feeling the man’s hip bones press into the flesh of his forearm as he squirms under the touch. Simon’s other hand drifts upward to his chest, using the gentlest tracing touch on his left nipple. His lover makes the most gorgeous groan in return and Simon watches as goosebumps consume his flesh.

Simon starts casually circling the now raised pebble, ever so gently pinching it after a minute of languid touch. Simon holds Wille taut against him as the man involuntarily bucks and grinds.

There are so many different sides to Wille he is desperate to see but this, unencumbered vulnerability mixed with white hot desire, is memorizing.

Simon moves his index finger off of its spot on Wille’s left nipple to his lips.

“Will you suck on this for me, baby?”

Wille lets out an animalistic groan that goes straight to Simon’s crotch before taking Simon’s finger in his mouth eagerly.

He sucks and licks the digit thoroughly, passionately. Simon can’t help teasing his right hand a touch lower to the space above Wille’s groin, desperate to have more but determined to take this slow.

Simon moans at the sensation of it all as Wille sucks hard. Simon removes his spit slick finger and brings it back down to Wille’s nipple, coating the already hard surface with wetness.

Simon murmurs,

“Good boy”

as he continues his path of foreplay, praising Wille for taking such good direction.

It is the right choice of words because Wille moans angelically, his aching desire obvious as he begs for more,

“Please, Simon”

“You’ll have to be patient, love. I don’t want to rush this.”

Simon murmurs in the dusty auburn hair by Wille’s ear.

“I’d really like to undress you and then put my mouth on you. Is that okay?”

Wille nods vigorously and Simon starts to move them forward toward the bed. Once he gets to the edge, he turns Wille around, placing a sweet, sensual kiss as he holds onto his waist.

Simon gestures to his belt and pants,

“May I?”

Wille meets his gaze and nods with the most endearing smile that feels as precious as it looks.

Simon unbuckles his belt, taking the leather out of their loops and rolling it before setting it down on his bedside table. He unbuttons Wille’s slacks, holding one hand at the waistband of Wille’s boxer briefs and the other dragging the zipper down. He feels Wille’s gaze on him as he slides the pants down to his ankles.

Simon kneels in front of Wille, gesturing him to lift his feet one at a time to remove his pants. He allows his hot breath to linger on his strong thighs and kisses the skin just below his underwear. Wille’s hands gravitate to Simon’s wild curls, finding their home in his scalp as Simon places more sweet pecks on his lover’s legs. Wille’s large hands in his hair tugs at something deep in his core, desire exploding with each grasp and shift of Wille’s grip.

Eager to continue the sweet torture, Simon kisses up the fabric, mouthing Wille’s straining erection through the briefs. He chances a glance up to the most gorgeous, blissed out expression. Wille’s precum is leaking through the fabric and Simon can almost taste the salty notes of his pretty boy.

“I’d like to take these off too, if that’s okay?”

Simon loops his fingers around the waistband, waiting for Wille’s response before pulling them down.

Wille responds eagerly,

“Yes, Simon”

and hearing his name said so sensually by the insanely handsome man staring down at him is enough for him. Wille’s hard cock is freed by the motion and Simon wastes no time reaching for it.

He rolls them both onto the bed before resuming the sweet torture. Simon keeps his grip light at first, wrapping his small, delicate hand around the writhing man before teasing his thumb on his wet tip. He strokes the slit and Wille arches, stifling a groan at the teasing touch.

Simon closes the gap between his body and Wille’s, placing his mouth on the man’s hip and sucking sweet kisses into the boney flesh. He keeps his painfully slow pace with his hand while he carefully forms bruises for Wille to remember him by. His kisses get sloppier as his mouth approaches the base of Wille’s cock, eager to finally put his mouth on him in the way he’s been aching to for what feels like hours.

He uses his hand to shift the man into his mouth, tasting the salty precum and hearing Wille’s gorgeous moan echo in the small space. Simon can see the man’s chest heave and face contort in pleasure with continued determination while Simon sucks him off.

He pulls out all of his tricks; hollowing his cheeks and sucking deeply, bobbing his head so Wille’s tip touches the back of his throat, circling the head with his wet tongue and swollen lips. It isn’t long before Wille is shaking underneath him, quivering at each touch and begging Simon for more.

He reluctantly takes Wille’s length out of his mouth, stroking him with his own spit before he says,

“I want to taste you, sweetheart. I want you to cum down my throat.”

It must be the right thing to say because Wille groans loudly, bucking his hips involuntarily as Simon takes him back into his mouth, all the way to his base until the corners of his eyes begin to water. Tears form as he sucks with vigor until Wille spills his seed down Simon’s throat; salty and warm. The sounds Wille’s making nearly make Simon cum untouched.

Simon sucks him dry, coaxing every last twitch of overstimulation out of him before he feels Wille’s hand tug on his hair.

Simon releases Wille’s cock and wipes a dribble of cum from his bottom lip before climbing up Wille’s body to place a sweet kiss on the corner of his lips. Wille wraps his hand around his waist, pulling Simon tight against him, nuzzling in post orgasmic bliss.

“Fuck Simon, that was incredible.”

Simon chuckles at the compliment before quickly retorting,

“I aim to please.”

“Likewise….”

Wille continues eagerly, grazing his fingers down Simon’s sides in a way that makes goosebumps reemerge and his still hard dick throb.

“How can I make you feel good, baby? How do you want it?”

Wille’s bluntness is such a turn on for Simon, he responds unabashedly,

“I really want you to finger me…You have the longest, prettiest fingers.”

Simon doesn’t think Wille’s smile can get much larger as rotates on his side to face him.

“I want that, too.”

Without asking, Wille retrieves lube from Simon’s bedside table and Simon is too turned on to ask how he knew it would be there. The sound of the cap popping open sends a shiver down Simon’s spine as he anticipates Wille’s touch.

They lay on their sides, face to face and Simon splays his legs open to grant Wille easier access. Wille’s fingers graze his hard cock on their way to his taint and Simon can’t help but beg for more,

“Please, baby, I need you.”

Simon doesn’t have to ask twice, feeling Wille’s lube-soaked finger trace his hole with reverence before pushing past his muscle with careful confidence. The intrusion is everything Simon has been waiting for. He grabs behind his own knee, pulling it towards his chest to adjust the angle and allow Wille better access. His ever-attentive lover takes the hint, advancing his finger all the way in until it grazes his prostate, eliciting an embarrassingly needy whimper.

“Fuck, you’re so tight Simon.”

Wille finds Simon’s lips in an open kiss as he rocks his finger inside him. The sensation is overwhelming good, Simon feels like he is weightless. Wille knows just what he needs, lining up a second finger and resuming his perfect pace, curling and hitting Simon’s prostate with each careful stroke. Between sloppy, sexy kisses, Wille murmurs,

“You are so beautiful Simon, fucking yourself on my fingers. Take whatever you need from me baby, I’m yours.”

The words and pressure as Wille finger fucks him makes Simon lose control, allowing the pleasure to consume him. It’s the same orgasm that’s been slowly building over the course of their night, now rapidly approaching. He pushes into each thrust of Wille’s fingers until his cock twitches and he cums untouched all over both of their chests, the friction of their close bodies pressed close, sending him over the edge.

The movement slows until the muscle soreness and overstimulation forces him to relax completely into Wille’s arms. Simon voices his own realization out loud,

“Fuck, Wille, you just made me cum untouched. That’s…kind of insane.”

Simon gets the words out despite his heavy breathing and full body tremors. Wille’s eyes are bright, smile wide. The devotion Simon feels in this moment is too precious to name.

Resuming their comfortable banter, Simon continues,

“I’d like to do that like 100 more times.”

Wille responds with a chuckle as he holds Simon close and tickles his back,

“That can be arranged.”

The smirk on Wille’s face is so cute that Simon can’t help but pull the man close for a kiss. Like clockwork, both men’s stomachs growl and Simon breaks their kiss, laughing at the universes sense of humor before suggesting,

“Maybe, after we clean up and make some dinner?”

Wille chuckles in the space between them,

“Absolut, we are in no rush. I’m not going anywhere, Simon.”

I’m not going anywhere, Simon.

With no words to respond, Simon allows his lips to do the talking, kissing Wille deeply before pulling them both out of bed to shower in post orgasmic bliss.

Chapter Text

Wille is ready to recite a monologue if that is what it takes to reassure Simon of his commitment. All of the anxieties that hover at his periphery silence in Simon’s presence. He knows he has a lot to figure out as far as what his future looks like, but he needs Simon. 

The shorter man is staring up at him with a depth that makes Wille’s heart beat out of his chest. Simon’s dark eye’s show his emotion like a glass lake at midnight; with a sincerity preserved for night sky and nature. 

His train of thought is interrupted with rosy warm lips pressing deliciously against his own. Wille feels everything as Simon leads their lips in a dance that draws every emotion out of him; desire, warmth, longing, gratitude, heat, heat, heat…

Wille feel’s his bottom lip go pliant between Simon’s teeth, a sharp bite that ignites desire too delicious to ignore. He can’t help the moan that escapes between them, increasingly desperate for more of Simon. 

Before he can consider what, he needs, Simon’s hands are in his hair, tugging gently at the roots as he deepens their kiss. Wille eagerly reciprocates the affection, drawing Simon in by his narrow waist and pulling them flush. He needs as much of Simon on him as humanly possible. Simon groans as their chests meet and Wille will do anything to repeat such a gorgeous noise. 

Wille feel’s Simon’s small hands move across his chest, grasping at his shirt and jumper, untucking the fabric from his slacks until the man’s soft hands are grabbing at his bare skin. He lets Simon’s touch consume him as they kiss, eager and willing to give himself over to this man; for all that he is and all that he isn’t. 

Wille wants to be Simon’s. 

…and Simon wants to be Wille’s. 

The realization of their conversation hits him like cool air after a hot shower. Desire comes in a wave so sudden and strong that Wille can’t help the sounds he makes as their kiss grows increasingly needy and hot. 

He feel’s Simon hand on the small of his back and Wille responds by grinding into his lover, unabashed and eager. 

“I want this off” 

Simon pants between open mouth kisses, tugging on the fabric separating the two men. 

Words fail to form so Wille simply nods in response, deftly flipping his shirt inside out, over his head, exposing his bare chest to the most beautiful person he has ever met. Simon stays close, smirking with hungry eyes and kiss bitten lips, still fully dressed but no less sexy. He looks like a whole meal, unfairly handsome. Wille can’t help the dopey smile on his face as stands in Simon’s living room half naked. 

Simon has a twinkle in his eye as he begins to lift his own shirt, painfully slowly. Wille watches his hands as a sliver of tan skin emerges from under the man’s turtleneck. His soft skin and happy trail make Wille’s mouth water. He can’t help but stare at the slow strip tease, the reverie of the moment abruptly interrupted by Simon dropping the fabric to cover him once again. Wille realizes he is staring and finds Simon’s eye’s crinkling in delight, devilish grin spread wide as he taunts him.

Wille lets out a small chuckle,

“Tease”

before reaching out to grab a fistful of fabric and pull his lover in in, kissing him with hot, desperate neediness aimed to show Simon just how much he likes him.

Simon further reinforces his teasing intent by placing one hand over Wille’s shoulder and the other on his chest; dragging his fingers down his bare front, feather light until he reaches the bulge in Wille’s increasingly tight pants. Simon cups Wille’s erection over the thin fabric before using his other hand to stroke the soft skin on his neck above his shoulder. 

Wille is lost in pleasure, every touch and flick of Simon’s wrists shooting electricity through all of his senses. Simon is a drug he never wants to get sober from. 

As if on cue, Simon quietly murmurs,

“I’ll show you a tease…”

before placing a chaste kiss by his ear and stepping away completely.

Wille meets his gaze quickly, desperate to follow Simon’s lead and eager to reciprocate the sweet attention. Fortunately, Simon doesn’t make him wait long, reaching out to Wille, nodding in the direction of the bedroom before smiling ear to ear.

Wille stands face to face with the room of his lover, little pieces of Simon sprinkled in the space; his own record collection stacked neatly on a bookshelf, colorful canvas paintings that almost look original, and a keyboard propped against the side wall. He could spend hours digesting the space and listening to Simon’s stories but soft, warm hands wrapping around his waist remind him of their original intent.

Wille allows his head to fall back, leaning into Simon’s tight embrace as Simon’s hands tickle and explore his exposed torso. The touch remains light and tantalizing; if Wille wasn’t so grounded in this reality with Simon, it would feel like a dream. 

Simon’s right arm presses on his hip bone as his palm teases the space just below his navel. He can feel Simon’s still clothed chest press firmly into his bare back. Wille can’t help but squirm in eager anticipation.

As if Simon has a front row seat to his most intimate sexual fantasies, he continues moving his left hand up Wille’s waist until it reaches his nipple, teasing Wille in his favorite way. He can’t help but groan, goosebumps littering his chest and desire coursing to his already throbbing dick. 

Simon starts casually circling the now raised pebble, ever so gently pinching it after a minute of languid touch. Simon is firm in his hold and Wille can’t help himself; grinding, bucking, moaning, desperate. 

Simon moves his index finger off of his nipple towards his lip. 

Oh.

Into the crook of his neck, Wille hears Simon ask ever so gently, 

“Will you suck on this for me, baby?”

Fuck. 

Wille eagerly licks the digit, taking into its mouth to show Simon what he really wants; spit pooling as Simon’s finger fucks his mouth. Wille feels Simon’s right hand move lower towards his groin and Wille returns the favor by using his tongue to lick and suck Simon’s finger with dirty passion

Simon moans and the sound is angelic; breathy and unapologetic. Simon removes his spit slick finger and brings it back down to Wille’s nipple, coating the already hard surface with wetness that makes Wille dizzy. 

Simon murmurs,

“Good boy”

as he continues his path of foreplay. How did Simon know that Wille has a bit of a praise kink? 

Wille decides he isn’t above begging, 

“Please, Simon” 

Please. 

Simon responds with resolve and control, 

“You’ll have to be patient, love. I don’t want to rush this”

As if able to read his mind, Simon continues, 

“I’d really like to undress you and then put my mouth on you. Is that okay?”

Wille nods vigorously and Simon moves them both toward the bed. Once he gets to the edge, he turns Wille around, placing a sweet, sensual kiss as he holds onto his waist. 

Simon’s eyes are large, pupils blown with desire and lust as he survey’s Wille. Feigning innocence, he gestures towards Wille’s pants,

“May I?”

Wille nods enthusiastically as Simon steps closer to unbuckle his belt, removing it from their loops and rolling it with the kind of adorable attention to detail that he is learning to expect from Simon. The man sets it down on his bedside table before unbuttoning his slacks and sliding the garment down his legs. 

Simon kneels in front of Wille, gesturing him to lift his feet one at a time to remove his pants from the pool at his feet. Simon’s breath tickles Wille’s leg hair as his soft lips kisses his now exposed thighs. Wille’s hands gravitate to Simon’s wild curls, finding their home in his scalp as he places more sweet kisses on his bare legs before moving to his boxer briefs. Simon kisses up the fabric, mouthing Wille’s straining erection, and the contact is euphoric. 

Wille’s precum is leaking through the fabric and Simon can almost taste the salty notes of Wille’s desperation.

“I’d like to take these off too, if that’s okay?”

Simon loops his fingers around the waistband, waiting for Wille’s response before pulling them down. 

“Yes, Simon”

Wille’s hard cock is freed by the motion and Simon wastes no time reaching for him. Simon rolls them both onto the bed before resuming the sweet torture.  

Simon touches Wille’s cock and the light grip is heavenly. He takes in each movement and flick of Simon’s wrist with eager anticipation, before feeling Simon’s thumb on his wet tip. Simon strokes the slit and Wille arches, stifling a groan at the teasing touch. 

Simon closes the gap between their bodies, placing his mouth on the man’s hip and sucking sweet kisses into the boney flesh. He keeps his painfully slow pace with his hand while he carefully forms bruises for Wille to appreciate for days to come. Simon’s kisses get sloppier as his mouth approaches the base of his cock, using his hand to shift Wille’s cock into his mouth. Warmth envelops him in a way he has begging for for what feels like hours. 

Wille loses himself in the pleasure; feeling Simon’s mouth and tongue work so diligently, responding to every cue with determination and vigor. The sight is godly, Simon’s dark curls bobbing as he takes his cock so deep. It doesn’t take long for Wille to be on the knife’s edge of his orgasm, quivering in anticipation. 

Attentive to his condition, Simon pop’s off Wille’s throbbing cock, stroking him with his own spit as he says,

“I want to taste you, sweetheart. I want you to cum down my throat.”

FUCK. 

Wille groans loudly, bucking his hips involuntarily as Simon takes him back into his mouth, all the way to his base until his eyes begin to water. Wille pries his eyes open to watch Simon cry on his cock, maintaining his relentless pace with precision until Wille let’s go; cumming down Simon’s throat in what feels like the strongest orgasm of his entire life.

Simon sucks him dry, coaxing every last twitch of overstimulation out of him before Wille reaches down to his lover, gesturing him to stop and snuggle close.

Simon releases Wille’s cock and wipes a dribble of cum from his bottom lip before climbing up Wille’s body and placing a sweet kiss on the corner of his lips. Wille wraps his hand around his waist, pulling Simon tight against him, desperate to nuzzle him close.

Wille breaks the breathy silence,

“Fuck Simon, that was incredible.”

Simon chuckles at the compliment before quickly retorting,

“I aim to please.”

Simon’s lips are swollen with lust, hot from the diligent work on his own cock. 

Wille wants to show Simon just how fucking hot he is,

“Likewise….”

Wille gently grazes Simon’s sides, eliciting goosebumps that suggest that Simon would be open to some reciprocation, 

 “How can I make you feel good, baby? How do you want it?”

I’ll do anything for you. 

To his delight, Simon responds with honesty,

“I really want you to finger me…You have the longest, prettiest fingers.”

Wille can’t help his own smile at Simon’s request, so turned on and confident in what he likes.

“I want that, too.”

Logic takes over and Wille reaches towards the bedside table, where he keeps his own lube, delighted to find that great minds think alike. He grabs the bottle with confidence, popping the cap before turning back to Simon who is nearly undressed and adjusting his position in eager anticipation. 

They lay on their sides, face to face and Simon splays his legs open to grant Wille easier access. Wille wants to give Simon what he wants, what he needs. He allows his long fingers graze Simon’s hard cock on their way to his taint, teasing with care before Simon moans,

“Please, baby, I need you.”

Unable to deny this man any request, Wille allows his lube-soaked finger to trace his hole before pushing past his muscle with careful confidence. Simon’s hole is welcoming; warm and tight around his finger. Simon grabs behind his own knee, pulling it towards his chest to adjust the angle to allow Wille better access. Understanding Simon’s silent request, Wille advances his finger all the way in until it grazes his prostate, eliciting a gorgeous, needy whimper. 

“Fuck, you’re so tight Simon.”

Wille finds Simon’s lips in an open kiss as he rocks his finger inside him, touching his prostate with careful consistence before adding another finger to Simon’s tight hole. Between sloppy, sexy kisses, Wille murmurs,

“You are so beautiful Simon, fucking yourself on my fingers. Take whatever you need from me baby, I’m yours.”

Simon continues his rhythm, fucking himself onto Wille’s fingers, rocking desperately into Wille’s kiss. He pushes into each thrust until his cock twitches and he cums untouched all over both of their chests, Simon’s seed spilling sticky white streams until they are both covered in his passion.

Simon slows his movements while Wille basks in the beauty that is post-orgasmic bliss, reveling in each sweaty curl stuck to the nape of his neck and love bite he left earlier this week. His admiration is interrupted by Simon’s sweet, gravely voice, still shaky from the full body tremors of his orgasm, 

“Fuck, Wille, you just made me cum untouched. That’s…kind of insane.”

All Wille can do is smile in return before Simon continues,

“I’d like to do that like 100 more times.”

Wille can’t help but chuckle, giddiness and delight overtaking him at the thought of satisfying Simon so thoroughly. He holds the petite man close, ignoring the mess while gently ticking his back, 

“That can be arranged.”

At the quip, Simon pulls Wille close and places a chaste kiss that is quickly interrupted by both men’s growling stomachs. How many times will their hunger interrupt their post-coital bliss?

Simon relents,

“Maybe, after we clean up and make some dinner?”

Wille chuckles before pulling Simon tight once again and whispering,

“Absolut, we are in no rush. I’m not going anywhere, Simon.”

I’m not going anywhere.

Simon responds with a bright, smiling kiss before pulling them both out of the bed and towards the shower.

I’m not going anywhere.

Chapter Text

Simon is in his element; chopping potatoes into bite sized pieces, combining spices into a glass bowl, prepping the chicken for baking. Cooking feels adjacent to music; carefully orchestrated with a lot of creative freedom.

He moves around his galley kitchen with quick feet and a light heart, excited to make dinner for Wille.

The whole scene is very domestic; warm evening light, oven pre-heating, stolen kisses and a table for two.

Wille lingers at Simon’s periphery, offering help and encouragement as Simon combines the ingredients with ease until the sheet pan meal is ready to bake.

Wille’s sweet voice emerges from their comfortable silence,

“Have you always enjoyed cooking?”

smiling at Simon with curiosity.

Simon has not always enjoyed cooking. The topic sometimes feels more complicated than it needs to be but isn’t that always the case when family is involved. He learned to cook at a young age, out of necessity. Growing up with one shift work parent and another who was as unreliable as spring weather in Sweden, Simon grew comfortable in the kitchen.

He longed for family dinners like cheesy American sitcoms; happily married parents and cheerful kids huddled around a home cooked meal before watching a movie together. Over time, he realized the fallacy of such a fantasy. A market ploy to make him feel inadequate in his own life. Simon began to embrace his family’s unique dynamics; appreciating their unique night owl schedule and always bustling living room. Family became synonymous with community which means lot more people in Simon’s corner than a spit shined version of ‘the perfect family’ propped at the dining room table at a certain time.

“Actually, no…”

Simon starts before relaxing his shoulders into the conversation, opening himself up to vulnerability. It’s easy to do with those warm molasses eyes returning his glance, searching and encouraging for any answer that would give the man a little more insight.

Wille listens intently, the quiet observant type who never interrupts as Simon sheds light on his own complicated family dynamic.

The conversation is just so easy. They talk about nothing and everything with fluidity usually reserved for lifelong relationships.

The oven timer chimes after what feels like no time at all and Simon plates their dinner before settling in at the small table. The men eagerly eat.

Wille chuckles with his mouth full, groaning in delight as he readies another fork full of the delicious meal.

Simon can’t help the giddy smile spreading at the continued compliments.

“You like?”

Simon responds coyly, eliciting an even larger reaction as Wille flails his arms in the air while eagerly scooping more onto his fork.

“I love! Seriously, Simon, is there anything you can’t do?”

Wille’s tone is joking but he maintains eye contact, awaiting an answer to his silly question with a determination that makes Simon laugh out loud.

“Plenty, but I’m trying to impress this really handsome, smart, funny, thoughtful guy I’m seeing so I’m putting my best foot forward.”

Simon winks at Wille for good measure, residual electricity bubbling between them. Wille receives the compliment with half an eye roll that is equal parts cute and sassy.

The two eat their meal in quiet companionship until they have clean plates and full bellies, exchanging soft smiles between bites.

Without wasting a moment, Wille clears their dishes from the table, washing them in the sink with careful attention. The man even has the audacity to look cheerful and hot doing it.

The gesture feels so attentive and kind that Simon pushes down the swell of emotion threatening to flood the moment, opting instead to squeeze behind his lover and wrap his arms around his waist while he washes. Simon places a chaste kiss on the small of his neck, appreciating the goosebumps as they arise at the contact.

Wille leans into the embrace, cooing at the contact while Simon revels at being the reason for such a response.

The tap water bubbles against the stainless-steel sink as warm steam rises between them. Simon can feel Wille’s body react beneath his touch, core clenching and breath quickening.

“It’s hard to focus on dishes when you’re doing that…”

Wille’s voice is breathy, a barely audible whisper as Simon places wet, barely there kisses along the borrowed sweatshirt Wille’s wearing.

Simon indulges the thick lust in the air,

“Oh? Am I distracting you?”

Simon smiles into his neck, moving his hands across Wille’s torso until both tuck underneath the hem and caress his bare skin.

Wille lets out a breath and goosebumps now litter his core, evidence of Simon’s gentle touches, emerging with each innocent swipe of his fingernails on bare skin.

Simon feels Wille’s toned ass press into him as the man wiggles his hips painfully slow with enough pressure to make Simon’s dick twitch at the friction and breath catch at the power play.

Simon stays pressed against Wille, moving his hands to his hips while allowing himself to grind into taller man.

“Fuck, Wille”

Simon breaths into his lover. He feels like a horny teenager, so deeply affected by every minuscule movement. Heat pools behind his navel and he can’t ignore the full body electricity, the inevitable pull of his Wille.

Wille continues his teasing movements, hands stabilizing him on the kitchen counter as his large fingers grip the edge. The sight is filthy and so fucking hot.

Simon needs more.

He reaches around Wille to turn off the faucet, pausing the background noise and allowing their bated breath and longing noises to fill the space. The movement presses Wille into the counter, earning a delicious groan as the man’s cock is trapped between the cabinet and Simon’s needy body.

Simon brings his hands back to Wille’s body, swaying with Wille’s movement and allowing his desperate need to feel Wille pliant against him. Simon presses his right hand between Wille’s pinched shoulder blades where his arms continue to support their movements. Wille allows himself to relax into the pressure, bending over the counter until his forearms are flush with the cool countertop and his ass is pressed firmly into Simon’s narrow hips and hard cock.

Simon can’t help his hands that are roaming the expanse of Wille’s strong back while they grind together, quiet moans escaping when the pressure is just right.

Simon loops his fingers around Wille’s borrowed sweats, tugging at the fabric, asking for permission to expose Wille’s perfect ass.

Simon’s voice is deep and husky,

“May I?”

To which Wille eagerly responds,

“Fuck yes”

Simon pushes the sweatshirt up Wille’s back, exposing the pale expanse and defined muscles without removing the garment entirely before tugging down Wille’s pants to reveal his ass. He forgot that they didn’t put on any underwear after their shower, which makes Simon’s mouth fucking water.

He needs Wille in every way; under him, on him, in him, around him, as close as two people can be and as soon as possible.

Simon leans over Wille’s bare backside, planting wet kisses on his spine as his fingers trace his ribs with feather light touches. His lover is half undressed and oh so sexy, laid out like a whole fucking meal on his kitchen counter.

Simon can’t help himself as he hovers over Wille’s back dimples before placing a wet, languid kiss just above his crack. Wille is writhing underneath his lips and touch, grinding deliciously, letting out the most desperate sounding whimpers at Simon’s teasing touch.

“May I put my mouth on you?”

Wille’s head dips further and the moan he responds with makes Simon all the more eager.

“I need words, baby.”

Simon murmurs against Wille’s back side, lowering himself to his knees as he waits for a resounding yes.

“Fuck Simme, yes. Please”

Simon moves his hands down Wille’s side, parting his cheeks to reveal his pale, pink hole. Simon uses his nose to nuzzle, taking in Wille’s scent; musky and clean with his soft hair tickling his nose. Simon begins kissing his cheeks before licking Wille’s taint, eliciting the most gorgeous moan from his man.

Simon goes to work, licking his puckering hole with equal parts passion and need. He allows saliva to pool in his mouth before allowing it to drip out, following its path downward towards his balls. Wille’s taint is gloriously wet and by the sounds emanating from above, Simon is doing a good job.

Simon burries his face, holding Wille close as he licks, kisses, and sucks until his lover’s legs are quivering. Between panting breaths and unfiltered moans, Wille manages,

“Need you”

Simon leans back on his heels, coating his fingers in saliva before rubbing his rim.

“Wille, you’re so fucking beautiful.”

Simon coos, entranced by the sight before him and painfully hard. His cock is aching to be touched, and so Simon continues fingering his rim while he palms himself.

“What do you need baby?”

Without hesitation, Wille responds, no demands,

“I need you to fuck me, right the fuck now.”

And holy shit, there is nothing Simon wants more. Eager beyond measure, Simon stands, only to slide his pants down his thighs, cock bobbing free, leaking and ready.

Simon shuffles, pants around his ankles but too turned on to care, to their kitchen junk drawer that has a small bottle of emergency lube Damon stashed there after his own kitchen hook up.

Wille is palming himself with one hand while the other reaches behind to his own wet hole. The sight is obscene, dripping with lust and desperation. Simon smiles at Wille’s neediness, lost in their shared ecstasy and whining for Simon in a way that will haunt his wet dreams for years.

Simon lubes up his own cock before squeezing a generous amount on his fingers as he resumes his position behind Wille. He drags his wet fingers down his crack, circling his heat before asking,

“Ready for me babe?”

Wille pushes his hips back onto Simon’s fingers as he confirms,

“Yes, please, give me everything. I can take it.”

The request is so desperate that Simon wastes no time in fingering Wille deeply, pushing past his tight muscle and stretching him with intention, adding fingers as Wille begs for ‘more’, over and over and over again, until he is ready to take him in full.

Simon removes his fingers and Wille clenches around nothing, whimpering.

Simon pumps his leaking cock, adding fresh lube before lining up with Wille’s aching heat. Simon sees stars when he enters him, the anticipation and build up paling in comparison to the feeling of Wille’s tight hole squeezing his cock.

He pauses when he bottoms out, allowing time for Wille to adjust before setting the pace. Wille is having none of it though, pushing back on his dick eagerly, greedily as he groans,

“Fuck me Simme.”

Simon places one hand in Wille’s hair, gently pushing his head into the counter while his arms reach for something to hold. Simon feels his silky strands and stares at his gorgeous, scrunched up face while he holds him in place. With his other hand firmly on Wille’s hip, Simon pulls out nearly all of the way before slamming back into Wille, rewarded with the most gorgeous moan in response.

Desire takes over and Simon allows the pleasure to consume him, pounding into Wille with insatiable need and white-hot desire. Both men are screaming in tandem, moans mixed with pleas of pleasure as they chase their orgasms together.

Simon can’t help himself, narrating his thoughts out loud as he continues his merciless pace,

“You’re so hot, laid out for me, taking my cock so well.

You feel amazing Wille, so fucking tight.

God, you’re beautiful.

Fuck, no one compares to you. It’s only you, Wille, only you.”

Simon feels Wille contract around him as he hits that perfect spot deep inside. He’s singing Simon’s name like a prayer before his orgasm takes the microphone, loud moans echoing off the walls as he cums untouched all over the kitchen cabinets. Simon fucks him through his orgasm, following soon after with his own elation, spilling his seed deep inside his gorgeous lover.

He stills after the post orgasmic shivers cease, rubbing Wille’s back and body with a gentle tenderness as their breath slowly returns to normal. He needs Wille to know how special he is, placing chaste kisses on his exposed skin with sincerity he hopes Wille can feel.

Simon pulls out and gently turns Wille to face him. The taller man is looking down at him with maple glazed eyes, pupils blown and hair disheveled. Simon closes the small gap between them, gently stroking Wille’s flushed cheeks before pulling him in for a slow, adoring kiss.

Wille chuckles innocently between them, mischief in his eyes,

“All that because I did the dishes?”

The smirk on his face is priceless, obviously content with his own joke and Simon’s responding thunderous laughter.

They are both pulled into the jovial fit, laughing so hard that tears start to form, and Simon is beginning to feel lightheaded from so much serotonin. When their lungs find air again, Simon responds,

“All that because I have the hottest most thoughtful boyfriend in the whole world…and I can’t seem to keep my hands, or mouth, off of him.”

Simon hears Wille’s gasp, the quiet intake of air and subsequent toothy smile that spreads. Wille cocks his eyebrow, quirking it up before clarifying but Simon cuts him off before he has the chance,

“…especially when he is doing housework without asking.”

The two are a flustered, fumbling, giggling mess. It’s so refreshing to be able to joke with someone who also makes you weak in the knees with want. 

“Next time, I’ll be sure to bring my maids outfit and lace stockings.”

Simon playfully shoves Wille, the both of them nearly falling given their compromised half naked state, pants around their ankles.

“Don’t tempt me, mi amor.”

Simon leans into Wille’s ear, lips grazing the flesh as he whispers,

“If you show up in lace, my dick will be sore, and you won’t be able to walk for a week.”

Wille groans,

“Fuck Simon, you’re going to be the death of me.”

“Likewise, pretty boy.”

Simon drapes his arms around Wille’s shoulders, looping them behind his neck before suggesting,

“Now let’s go get cleaned up, baby”

Chapter Text

Wille is in heaven; basking in the radiant warmth of Simon as he dances around the kitchen with confidence. Simon looks so comfortable, prepping their meal with no recipe in sight.

Wille steals quick kisses, offering encouragement, enamored by the handsome man cooking him dinner. The scene is far too domestic for a week of dating, but Wille embraces the scene, grateful that Simon reciprocates his eager affection.

Perhaps Simon can teach him how to cook someday. Although, the reality of Wille focusing on anything but Simon’s deep eyes and nimble hands when working so closely together feels next to impossible. He’s not sure he will ever not be deliciously flustered by Simon’s presence, especially not when he looks so damn happy.

Curiosity blossoms and Wille wonders out loud,

“Have you always enjoyed cooking?”

smiling at Simon, awaiting a response.

Wille can’t quite read the emotion that crosses Simon’s face as he thoughtfully considers the question. Earnest and honest, Simon shoots Wille a shy smile,

“Actually, no…”

Simon paints a picture of his childhood family dynamics that shaped him into the man standing before him. Wille remembers that Simon’s mother is a nurse but never considered the impact that her unusual and long hours would have on her young children, combined with the dynamics of his father’s addiction. Simon is vulnerable in a way that makes Wille feel so treasured. It warms his heart that Simon feels comfortable enough with him to open up and share his feelings without a filter. It would have been easy to write off Wille’s questions with a warm platitude rather than share a piece of himself, but alas, Simon doesn’t take the easy route.

Wille is determined to listen intently, allowing each tidbit of information sink into his heart and soul. He needs Simon to know that Wille is a safe space, his safe space.

Their conversation continues, bending and morphing with ease as it goes. They talk about nothing and everything with fluidity usually reserved for lifelong relationships.

The oven timer interrupts their engaging conversation to announce that Simon’s delicious home-made meal is ready to be consumed. Simon plates their dishes and Wille can’t help but dig in eagerly. He chuckles with his mouth full, groaning in delight as he readies another fork full of the paprika chicken.

Simon is wearing the cutest, giddiest smile,

“You like?”

Always with an heir for the dramatic, Wille flails his arms in the air, gesturing his obvious joy,

“I love! Seriously, Simon, is there anything you can’t do?”

Wille says it with levity, but the sentiment is sincere. Simon continues to amaze him. To further reinforce his point, Wille stares loudly at Simon, maintaining eye contact until his handsome date responds,

“Plenty, but I’m trying to impress this really handsome, smart, funny, thoughtful guy I’m seeing so I’m putting my best foot forward.”

Simon winks at Wille and although he rolls his eyes, it is with butterflies in his stomach and heat in his cheeks.

The two eat their meal in quiet companionship until they have clean plates and full bellies, exchanging soft smiles between bites.

Without missing a beat, Wille clears their dishes from the table, washing them in the sink to show his appreciation for such a lovely home cooked meal. It is an unspoken rule of his that if someone cooks for him, he returns the favor by cleaning up. It is a small way he can show his appreciation, the least he can do.

He lets the dish detergent bubble in the sink as the warm water cascades over their dishes and silverware. He washes each with careful attention until he feels Simon’s warm body behind him, arms wrapping around his waist in a distractingly delightful way.  Simon places a chaste kiss on the small of his neck and Wille can’t help the goosebumps that emerge from the simple contact. He leans into the embrace, inadvertently cooing at the contact while Simon nuzzles closer.

The tap water bubbles against the stainless-steel sink as warm steam rises between them. Wille feels his body ignite with desire, breath quickening and core clenching under Simon’s simple touch. Confident that Simon is onto him, Wille offers,

“It’s hard to focus on dishes when you’re doing that…”

The sentence comes out breathy, a barely audible whisper, meanwhile Simon places wet, barely there kisses along the borrowed sweatshirt Wille’s wearing.

Simon’s voice responds, laden with lust,

“Oh? Am I distracting you?”

Wille can feel Simon smiling against his neck while he moves his hands across his torso until both are tucked underneath the hem, caressing his bare skin in a way that sends a shiver up Wille’s spine.

Desire hovers around them before Wille indulges it, pressing his ass back into Simon’s smaller frame, slowly teasing the man in an effort to regain any sense of control. Who was he kidding though, Wille needs this too. He is desperate for the friction, the feeling of Simon against him, consuming him.

“Fuck, Wille”

Simon breaths into his neck, spurring him on to continue their filthy grinding. Wille is eager to indulge this teenage wet dream, rutting against one another with hard, untouched cocks until the teasing becomes too unbearable and they are both pining for more. 

Simon’s unabashed eagerness makes Wille smile as Simon reaches around him to turn off the facet and press Wille further into the counter’s edge. Wille’s hard cock is now trapped between the cabinet with a fucking angel grinding into him from behind. He can’t help the groan that escapes at the pressure.

Simon reads his mind, responding to each groan with a twist of his hips that is pushing Wille closer and closer to the edge. Before long, Wille feels Simon’s hands on him; holding his hips in place as they chase friction together.

Wille is not sure what spurs Simon to press his shoulders into the counter but the direction and dominance of it all has Wille writhing in place, so fucking turned on by Simon’s willingness to give him exactly what he needs. It’s like Simon knows his body better than he does.

Wille gives himself over to the direction, bending over the counter until his forearms are flush with the cool countertop and his ass is pressed firmly into Simon’s narrow hips and hard cock.

Wille feel’s Simon’s hands along his back as he grinds into him, both moaning when the pressure feels just right.

Simon loops his fingers around Wille’s borrowed sweats, tugging at the fabric, asking for permission to expose Wille’s ass.

Simon’s voice is deep and husky as he confirms,

“May I?”

Wille can’t bring himself to contain his eagerness, instead indulging his desperation with a plea,

“Fuck yes”

Simon pushes Wille’s sweatshirt up his back, exposing his skin to the cool kitchen air before tugging down Wille’s pants to reveal his ass. He is completely exposed, at Simon’s mercy as he pines against the kitchen cabinets, achingly hard.

Simon leans over Wille’s bare backside, planting wet kisses on his spine as his fingers trace his ribs with feather light touches. Wille is lost in space, seeing starts with each swipe of Simon’s tongue on his body. He groans as Simon hovers over his back dimples, kissing him wet and slow just above his crack before asking,

“May I put my mouth on you?”

Wille can hardly keep himself up, allowing his head to dip between his shoulders as he moans. Ever polite and insanely sexy, Simon continues,

“I need words, baby.”

Simon murmurs the words against Wille’s exposed cheeks, lowering himself to the ground behind him. Wille’s brain recovers from his short circuit of complete and utter desire, responding with the words that were trapped in his moan,

“Fuck Simme, yes. Please”

Simon moves his hands down Wille’s side, parting his cheeks to reveal his hole. The countertop is cool against his stomach, and he grips the it’s opposing edge to ground himself before he gets lost in the touch. Simon’s hands move confidently, spreading him apart before Wille feels his nose nuzzle his crack. Wille’s hard cock is leaking precum, throbbing at the anticipation of Simon’s tongue on his taint.

The feeling is even better than he could have imagined, Simon’s warm tongue pressing to his clenching heat, licking and teasing his hole with such devotion that everything else fades into the background. All he feels is Simon’s plump lips and wet tongue painting his hole with passion and reverence. The sensation is everything he didn’t know he needed. Wille can’t help the sounds escaping his lips as Simon teases his rim with delicious strokes. Fuck Wille needs more.

Increasingly desperate, Wille manages,

“Need you”

Simon leans back on his heels, and his wet hole feels far too empty at the loss of contact. He feels Simon’s spit slick fingers gently prod his entrance, fingering him with reverence as Simon murmurs in response,

“Wille, you’re so fucking beautiful. What do you need baby?”

Without hesitation, Wille responds, no demands,

“I need you to fuck me, right the fuck now.”

Wille is rutting against the cabinet, desperate for any sort of friction while he waits for Simon to give him what he needs. While Simon works to undress himself and retrieve lube, Wille palms his cock with one hand while fingering himself with the other, desperate and waiting. Wille is so lost in lust and the thought that Simon brought him to the edge like this makes him wild with lust.

Simon lubes up his own cock before squeezing a generous amount on his fingers as he resumes his position behind Wille. He drags his wet fingers down his crack, circling his heat before asking,

“Ready for me babe?”

Wille pushes his hips back onto Simon’s fingers to confirm,

“Yes, please, give me everything. I can take it.”

Wille moans at the intrusion as Simon fingers him deeply, stretching him with intention. He adds another finger each time Wille begs him to, not caring how needy or desperate he sounds. He needs Simon right fucking now.

When he is ready to take Simon’s cock, the man pulls his fingers out, leaving Wille empty and clenching. He can’t help his whimper, eager to be filled by Simon’s throbbing dick.

Wille can hear Simon coat his cock in a fresh coat of lube before lining up his tip with his aching entrance. The anticipation leaves his skin crawling, as he feels Simon’s head tease him. Relief floods his system as he pushes past his tight muscle, bottoming out deep inside him, giving Wille exactly what he’s been begging for.

Simon pauses allowing time for him to adjust before setting the pace, but Wille is having none of it. He pushes back on Simon’s dick eagerly, greedily,

“Fuck me Simme.”

Wille feel’s Simon’s hand in his hair, gently pushing his head into the counter while his other hand rests firmly on Wille’s hip. It is so fucking hot. Simon taking control of him, taking care of him the way he needs.

Simon pulls out nearly all of the way before slamming back into Wille. He lets himself go, moaning loudly as Simon hits that spot deep within him. Simon persists with his relentless pace, pounding into Wille with insatiable need and white-hot desire. Both men are screaming in tandem, moans mixed with pleas of pleasure as they chase their orgasms together.

Wille hears Simon’s angelic voice, praising him with every stroke,

“You’re so hot, laid out for me, taking my cock so well.

You feel amazing Wille, so fucking tight.

God, you’re beautiful.

Fuck, no one compares to you. It’s only you, Wille, only you.”

Simon’s words edge him on, bringing him to his orgasm with a crashing intensity. Simon, Simon, Simon, Simon. He cums hard, spilling his seed as Simon hit his prostate with perfect precision. The euphoria washes over him with a crashing relief as Simon cums in tandem deep inside him.

Wille feels Simon’s hands rubbing gentle circles on his back as they shiver in post-orgasmic bliss. Simon is peppering sweet kisses on his exposed skin with a tenderness and sincerity that feels so intimate and special.

Simon pulls out and gently turns Wille to face him. He can’t help the adoration in his eyes as he looks at his handsome, half clothed lover. Simon closes the small gap between them, gently stroking Wille’s flushed cheeks before pulling him in for a slow, gentle kiss.

Wille can’t help but chuckle, mischief in his eyes,

“All that because I did the dishes?”

Simon erupts in laughter, nearly crying from the silly joke. Wille feels so completely happy, full.

Simon responds with a twinkle in his eye once they’ve both caught their breath,

“All that because I have the hottest most thoughtful boyfriend in the whole world…and I can’t seem to keep my hands, or mouth, off of him.”

Wille cocks his eyebrow, quirking it up before clarifying but Simon cuts him off before he has the chance,

“…especially when he is doing housework without asking.”

The two are a flustered, fumbling, giggling mess. It’s so refreshing to be able to joke with someone who also makes you weak in the knees with want. 

“Next time, I’ll be sure to bring my maids outfit and lace stockings.”

Simon playfully shoves Wille, the both of them nearly falling given their compromised half naked state, pants around their ankles. Wille indulges the joke, wiggling his eyebrows,

“Don’t tempt me, mi amor.”

Simon leans into Wille’s ear, lips grazing the flesh as he whispers,

“If you show up in lace, my dick will be sore, and you won’t be able to walk for a week.”

Wille groans,

“Fuck Simon, you’re going to be the death of me.”

“Likewise, pretty boy.”

Simon drapes his arms around Wille’s shoulders, looping them behind his neck before suggesting,

“Now let’s go get cleaned up, baby”

And Wille can’t help his responding smile, leaning into Simon’s touch.

Baby.

Chapter Text

The rest of the evening together is spent in quiet companionship, learning about each other in easy conversation. Simon has never felt more comfortable than in the crook of Wille’s neck, cuddled up on the couch with old Friends reruns playing in the background.

Simon learns that Wille doesn’t particularly enjoy Christmas or winter sports, for that matter. He prefers spiral bound notebooks and always writes in pen despite continuously editing poems and prose. He prefers candy to chocolate but both pale in comparison to his love for ice cream. He has no tattoos, but hopes to get his first to commemorate stepping out on his own by moving to Seattle.

There is so much more to learn but every new detail feels like a little piece of treasure to add to his chest.

The two reluctantly separate when their continuous stream of yawns become too obvious to ignore. Unsure of proper etiquette and anxious about appearing too eager, Simon quietly offers for Wille to spend the night. Fortunately, Wille’s amber eye meet his question with delight, placing a chaste kiss on Simon’s crown of curls before nodding excitedly.

“May I borrow some more clothes?”

Wille chuckles to himself,

“Really just underwear, socks, and maybe a tie to add to my collared shirt so it isn’t as obvious that I am wearing the same outfit as yesterday?”

Simon lets out a warm laugh, agreeing to the clothing logistics before tugging his lover off the couch and towards his bedroom,

“Of course, Wille. Now, let’s get snuggled in so we can maybe get….”

Simon strains to look at the entryway clock before calculating,

“Five hours of sleep?”

The two huff, sleepy smiles wide as they tuck in for a quick night’s sleep, cuddling close. Simon revels in Wille’s strong body wrapped around him as the two drift into a dreamless rest after the most amazing impromptu date.

***

A loud knock startles Simon awake before Damon slowly opens his bedroom door,

“Honey, I don’t know what or who you were doing last night but the kitchen looks like a bathhouse with cum all over the cupboards and while I look great in a maid’s costume, I do not have the wherewithal to clean that kind of mess this early in the morning.”

The always dramatic yet terribly endearing rant comes to an abrupt halt when the opening is wide enough for Damon to see Simon’s beet red blush and sleeping lover cuddled close.

“Oh shit!”

Damon whispers as his eyes land on Simon’s guest. Luckily, both men are covered by his duvet and Wille remains still asleep despite the initial volume of Damon’s announcement.

Simon feels the heat spread from his cheeks to his chest as he processes Damon’s initial statement… something about cum on the cupboards…

Oh shit.

Fuck.

Realization makes his stomach drop and Simon immediately dons his best puppy dog eyes as he apologizes,

“Fuck, I’ll take care of it asap Damon. I’m sorry, we got… a bit… distracted.”

Simon cringes internally as the words leave his mouth, painfully aware of how lame the excuse is.

“I’ll say...”

Damon gestures with his hands to mimic texting on a 2012 blackberry before aggressively, but affectionately ,  whispering,

“Fucking text me later, bitch”

Damon winks before blowing Simon a kiss,

“Love ya”

Simon can’t help his own smile at the entire interaction, gratitude pooling in his heart for his dear friend. Returning to the moment, Simon catches the blown kiss in his hand (an ongoing inside joke they have) before whispering,

“Okay, okay. Love you too, Damon”

The door closes with a quiet thud and Wille begins to stir next to him, hands searching for Simon under the warmth of the covers. Wille reaches out, finding purchase on his waist as he sleepily whispers,

“What was that about? Is everything okay?”

“Totally. That was just my roommate, Damon. He has an early shift at the coffee shop… But it is almost 5:30am so we should probably start getting ready soon anyways.”

Wille blinks the sleep away, slowly waking up with each passing moment. His voice has a morning gravely quality that makes the hair on the back of Simon’s neck prickle with affection and desire. There is just something so beautifully intimate about waking up with one another, vulnerable. Simon has never been a particularly poetic guy but his romantic lover is certainly rubbing off on him.

He takes in the sight of sweet Wille; wrinkles on his face from his pillow case and hair wildly tousled. Simon places a sweet kiss on his forehead as he admires his date in this deeply vulnerable form. Wille returns his affectionate gaze with a sleepy smile before siting up to place a kiss on Simon’s shoulder.

Simon continues,

“Also I need to go clean the kitchen quick because I kind of forgot about the mess we made last night and my roommate ended up coming home and found dried cum all over the cabinets sooo… yeah.”

Embarrassment flashes across Wille’s face, as he returns Simon’s gaze with intensity, surely trying to read the situation before responding.

Simon can’t help his giggle, starting as a rolling boil before erupting into a full blown cackling fit. Wille cautiously joins in, both doubled over before long.

Simon eventually manages,

“Damon didn’t care or anything but I figured I should get to it before we need to get going with the day.”

Simon reluctantly pulls himself out of bed and into the kitchen to act on his promise to Damon. Not before, picking out some clothes for Wille to borrow so he can get ready while Simon cleans up their mess. Simon thinks to himself, at the rate they are going, they ought to have a drawer at each other’s places. The thought remains in the quiet corner of his mind to bring up another time but the warmth lingers.

Simon makes fast work of his cleaning, transitioning his attention to coffee with hopes of rejuvenation after a wonderfully long night. The kettle boils to 96C as Simon grinds some fresh Queen Anne beans, a Cafe Ladro light roast to give them the extra caffeine they need to tackle antsy high school students on less than 5 hours of sleep. Once Simon has enough of the bitter sweet dust to produce two cups of pour over, he measures out 40g of coffee to begin his ritual.

He primes the filter, tarring the scale before continuing. He hears soft stocking feet pad across the hallway to join him in his little kitchen nook. Wille takes a deep breath in, dramatically inhaling the scent of the freshly ground coffee before wrapping his warm arms around Simon’s waist. The familiar scene makes him blush as flashbacks from yesterday’s dish duty flood his memory.

“Smells amazing” Wille whispers into Simon’s untamed curls

“Please don’t tell me you do something egregious like…”

Wille interrupts Simon before he can finish, both men uttering,

“Folgers” at the same time. Wille’s hands bounce on his waist as they chuckle at finishing one another’s sentence.

“Well, I hate to break it to you, but this will ruin you for any of that dirty river water you’re drinking.”

Simon is smiling as he continues his routine, pouring 800ml of perfectly boiled water over their carefully measured energy.

Wille responds with a warm, contented sigh as both men await the process.

***

[6 New Messages]

Wille: SIMON

Wille: Send help

Wille: 🚑

Wille: “Mr. Larsson, why are you wearing the same outfit as yesterday?”

Wille: ummm first of all, rude. second of all, Liam I DON’T POINT OUT WHEN YOU WEAR THE SAME DUMB CONCERT SWEATSHIRT FOR LIKE SIX DAYS IN A ROW.

Wille: ☠️

Simon’s jaw drops as he reads the series of texts. These kids are going to be the death of him. If he is being honest though, Simon is not particularly surprised that a student noticed, but rather, more surprised that they had the audacity to say something directly to Wille. God, they don’t pay substitute teachers enough.

Simon: Kids these days

Simon: Fucking ruthless

Simon: I’m so sorry Wille 😅😔

Simon: What did you say?

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Simon didn’t have to wait long for Wille to respond, aware that it’s passing time and he has a free period now.

[4 New Messages]

Wille: I made up some bullshit about how I hadn’t gotten my washer/dryer set up in my new place but

Wille: my blush definitely betrayed me

Wille: I had the “I got fucked over the counter by your music teacher last night” look written all over my face… but I redirected quickly sooooo who knows

Wille: 🥴🤷🏼‍♂️

Simon can’t help but smile at Wille’s joke and blush again .

Nothing about their relationship makes “sense” when he uses the same logic he has for every other relationship he’s been in. He shouldn’t be catching feelings so quick. He shouldn’t be so attatched to someone he barely knows. He shouldn’t miss Wille after only a couple hours apart… and yet, he does. Everything about them feels so damn right.

Simon is ready to admit, if only to himself, that he is a lovesick, pining fool.

The school bell breaks him from his reverie and his day continues with relative ease, the joy of his date with Wille carrying him through any lingering fatigue.

Chapter Text

The evening passes with comfortable ease, a post orgasmic fog that wraps Wille in a comfortable blanket, floating in the heavy Seattle air like the rain drops whose beads dance down Simon’s window. Being around Simon feels like coming home after discovering the meaning of the word itself.

The conversation feels insanely comfortable, given how much Wille usually detests the awkward emptiness of small talk, with its lack of sincerity and vulnerability. He is eager to absorb all of the little tidbits of information Simon is willing to give him.

Wille learns that Simon loves summer; preferring the ocean to a lake, and a sandy shore to a rocky one. Simon plays a plethora of instruments but only learned to read sheet music in university, after playing by ear his entire life. He has several sets of AirPods because the thought of being without music at any given moment makes his skin crawl and he’s maxed out the Spotify limit of saved songs with a variety that suggests lots of layers to the beautiful man in front of him.

They share secrets, cuddling close until their yawns are ongoing and too persistent to ignore. Wille allows Simon to take the lead, secretly hoping to be offered to sleep over. Much to his chagrin, Simon does just that in the comfortable silence as they untangle limbs. Wille doesn’t bother hiding his excitement, nodding with enthusiasm before placing a quick kiss on Simon’s perfectly tousled crown of curls. 

In considering the logistics, Wille asks

“May I borrow some more clothes? Really just underwear, socks, and maybe a tie to add to my collared shirt so it isn’t as obvious that I am wearing the same outfit as yesterday?”

He can’t help the chuckle that breaks up his rambling request. Fortunately, Simon responds in like with a warm laugh that warms Wille like hot honey, lemon tea on a drizzly afternoon. Simon agrees to Wille’s proposed clothing logistics before tugging him off the couch and towards his bedroom, 

“Of course, Wille. Now, let’s get snuggled in so we can maybe get….”

Simon gaze shifts to the entryway of his apartment, eyes straining to read a distant clock with sleep heavy eyes before calculating,

“Five hours of sleep?”

Both huff, resigned to their fate of fatigue, embracing the consequences of so much amazing quality time together. They arrange themselves in Simon’s queen bed, Wille wraps himself around Simon, desperate to feel every ridge of his body and their breathing slows and sleep overtakes them.

***

Wille feels Simon shift his weight in the bed with quiet whispering that Wille isn’t quite awake enough to process. One of the hushed voices is Simon’s sweet (tenor?) that is somehow still melodic despite just waking up. He fights sleep’s welcome embrace, blinking his heavy eyes with determination to check in with Simon. He blindly reaches for Simon’s impossibly small waist, finding purchase below his diaphragm before whispering,

“What was that about? Is everything okay?”

Simon allows himself to be pulled in by Wille’s needy hands, responding sweetly,

“Totally. That was just my roommate, Damon. He has an early shift at the coffee shop… But it is almost 5:30am so we should probably start getting ready soon.”

Wille allows the reality of the day to wash over him, more adamantly blinking and stretching to pull himself out of sleep. He slept so soundly by Simon’s side, no nightmares that interrupt his rest with anxiety. 

Wille often finds it difficult to share a bed with someone, his own trauma and the vulnerability required for explaining a panic attack to a stranger in the middle of the night reason enough to avoid the situation all together. He’s never felt that way with Simon though, the man’s gentle demeanor and assured presence, disarming and comforting Wille in a way he wasn’t sure was possible. 

Simon gives him grace, meeting his tired gaze with goodness before placing the sweetest kiss on his forehead. Wille returns the gesture with a chaste kiss on Simon’s exposed shoulder. 

Simon continues,

“Also, I need to go clean the kitchen quick because I kind of forgot about the mess we made last night, and my roommate ended up coming home and found all of our dried cum all over the cabinets sooo… yeah.

Embarrassment floods Wille’s senses as he processes the prospect of any stranger finding remnants of their passionate night. Fuck. 

Wille isn’t used to having a roommate and although he is usually quite contentious of keeping his space clean, he was too blissed out last night to consider cleaning up after they finished. Wille returns Simon’s gaze with intensity, trying to read the situation before responding, anxiety bubbling like acid reflux, he swallows the sour stress, awaiting Simon’s response. 

Relief pools as Simon giggles, the kind of contagious laughter that could draw a stranger into the conversation with the way it bubbles effervescently, light and unfiltered. Wille can’t resist joining in, 

 Simon finally manages,

“Damon didn’t care or anything, but I figured I should get to it before we need to get going.” 

Wille allows the levity to draw him out of bed as Simon reluctantly makes moves to clean up their mess. As he walks toward the door, he stops at his dresser, retrieving clothes for Wille to borrow, neatly stacking the items for Wille with a tenderness that prompts gratitude to bloom like spring. 

Wille smiles to himself as he puts on borrowed briefs and yesterday’s clothes with the addition of Simon’s tie. He knots it swiftly, muscle memory from a childhood of formal family holiday’s where one wouldn’t dream of opening stockings in anything less than a suit. Wille shakes away the cold memories that threaten to spoil his good mood, focusing instead on the scent of Simon’s detergent around his neck and gentle man who is currently cleaning his dried cum off of his kitchen cupboards. 

As he emerges from Simon’s bedroom, he smells his saving grace, a halo of steam from the kettle giving Simon a halo as he makes them both coffee with careful attention to detail. Wille can’t help his smile as quietly approaches his lover, wrapping his arms around his waist and hugging him tight as he breaths in the delicious scent filling the apartment. 

“Smells amazing” Wille whispers into Simon’s untamed curls

“Please don’t tell me you do something egregious like…”

And Wille can’t help himself, interrupting Simon with the laughable reality of his morning routine at home. Both men uttering, 

“Folgers” at the same time. Wille squeezes Simon, ever closer, hands bouncing as they both laugh at finishing one another’s sentence.

“Well, I hate to break it to you, but this will ruin you for any of that dirty river water you’re drinking.”

Simon is smiling and Wille responds with a warm, contented sigh as both men await the process. Wille could get used to this. 

***

Wille settles into the day with ease, giddiness of their night together carrying him through the day until a particularly bold student points out the obvious, 

“Mr. Larsson, why are you wearing the same outfit as yesterday?”

Fuck. 

Fuck, fuck fuck. 

Anxiety threatens to derail him but fortunately, Wille is well practiced in weaving a story under pressure. Years of ‘faking it until you make it’ proves helpful every once in a while. 

Wille clears his throat before responding,

“Yes Liam, well, my washer and dryer in my new place has an issue so I haven’t been able to do laundry yet. Thank you for your concern though.”

Wille turns to walk around the desk, hiding a blooming blush that always betrays him in moments like these. 

“Sure, Mr. Larsson, I say the same thing when I…”

Wille doesn’t let him finish, interrupting Liam to redirect the conversation to the lesson plan, simultaneously hushing the cascade of whispers while pulling up the PowerPoint to punctate his point. 

“Alright everyone. Today, we are going to talk about palindrome poems, also known as reverso or mirror poems. Tyler, the Creator’s song ‘Hey Jane’ is a great example of a type of palindrome poetry that relies on storytelling from different perspectives to…”

***

Once the bell rings and his students file out of the room, Wille pulls his phone out to text Simon with urgency,

Wille: SIMON

Wille: Send help

Wille: 🚑

Wille: “Mr. Larsson, why are you wearing the same outfit as yesterday?”

Wille: ummm first of all, rude. second of all, Liam I DON’T POINT OUT WHEN YOU WEAR THE SAME DUMB CONCERT SWEATSHIRT FOR LIKE SIX DAYS IN A ROW.

Wille: ☠️

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Wille laughs to himself as he awaits a reply. 

Teenagers can be difficult, but their audacity and boldness are some of the many reasons he loves teaching them. Sure, they are nuanced and complicated, but they are also funny and observant and insightful and impressionable and…

A gentle buzz interrupts his train of thought at Simon’s quick reply;

[4 New Messages]

Simon: Kids these days

Simon: Fucking ruthless

Simon: I’m so sorry Wille 😅😔

Simon: What did you say?

Wille can hear Simon’s tone of voice as he reads, smiling to himself like the lovesick fool that he is. 

Wille: I made up some bullshit about how I hadn’t gotten my washer/dryer set up in my new place but

Wille: my blush definitely betrayed me

Wille: I had the “I got fucked over the counter by your music teacher last night” look written all over my face… but I redirected quickly sooooo who knows

Wille: 🥴🤷🏼‍♂️

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Wille smiles to himself, reflecting on the last week and just how quickly someone can come into your life, changing it for the better. Simon, his Simon. Simon who is brave and smart and talented and thoughtful and loyal and kind and generous and witty and funny and beautiful and... Simon fucks him how he needs and holds him like he is something precious and makes him feel so fucking seen after a lifetime of feeling invisible and… God, he is so gone for this man. 

Wille opens his notebook to write; indulging in the opportunity to put words to exactly how he is feeling about Simon in a poem; lesson plans and grading be damned. He has a free period anyways and he won’t be able to focus on anything else until he puts these thoughts on paper. Simon, Simon, Simon, Simon… 

Chapter Text

The Holy Sacrament

I am teaching the kids about palindrome poems;

changing perspectives,

two different points of view

You wrap your arms around my waist as I wash the  dishes after your delicious dinner

The meal; an offering, a sacrament,

This is my body, for you Simon

I give myself freely

and you receive it with equal parts passion and tenderness

you fuck me so good

that I forget to feel self-conscious

body laid out for the taking

and I think I’m falling in love with you

I wrap my arms around your waist as you thoughtfully make us coffee

The steaming mug; an offering, a sacrament,

This is my blood, for you Wille

You take care of me, of us ,

unabashedly and with such gentleness.

Your laugh is my favorite alarm clock;

the pungent caffeine has nothing on the sound of your voice,

the feel of your laughter under my hands,

the way you make me feel alive

and I think I’m falling in love with you

Love and lust coexist in each touch;

every quiet exchange feels like something holy

something sacred

something more

something heavenly

Love

Chapter Text

[ 2 New Messages]

Wille: Hey Simme, I’d like to take you out on a proper date this weekend. Would you be interested and if so, what days/times are you free?

Wille: 👉🏼👈🏼

Simon can’t help the stupid grin on his face as he reads Wille’s question. They frequently text, sending one another pictures or memes back and forth throughout the day, but this is a delightful surprise. It’s also refreshing to have Wille enthusiastically planning something for the two of them! He is so used to such low effort partners or people who are ghost him completely that such basic kindness feels foreign. Wille’s attentive and doting nature does wonders for Simon’s confidence, building him up in a way that feels so sincere.

Simon: a proper date???

Simon: i feel spoiled

Simon: hmm let me check my calendar

Simon: turns out im completely free all weekend

Simon: 😉

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Excitement courses through his body, electricity, a familiar sensation he’s growing accustomed to with Wille. The man makes every nerve stand at attention with delightful goosebumps.

[ 6 New Messages]

Wille: Well without being too forward, I was hoping to do something Friday into Saturday…

Wille: Which would include you spending Friday night at my place, if you wanted to, of course.

Wille: Thoughts?

Wille: Also, to be clear, there is never any expectation or assumptions around sex. I am really loving getting to know you and don’t want you to feel pressure in that way. I just have a two-part date planned so I thought it might make sense for you to just stay over?

Wille: Okay, I’m rambling now.

Wille:🙃

Simon cannot wipe the grin from his face, wide and toothy with his K-9’s on full display. He is continuously impressed with how considerate, thoughtful, honest, and vulnerable Wille is. He says what he is thinking and feeling with a quiet confidence that feels like a superpower to Simon.

Simon: Wille, id love to spend Friday night with you

Simon: and i seriously appreciate you saying that

Simon: i know your intentions and feel so cared for that i am not remotely worried about any sexual expectations

Simon: although id be lying if i said i wasn’t excited to kiss you and snuggle close

Simon: as long as that’s something you wanted too, of course

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Simon watches as his messages deliver before adding one last question,

Simon: do i get to know the date? or is it a surprise? 😏

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Simon’s heart flutters at the possibilities, eager to know what kind of two-part date Wille is planning, but is equally happy to let the fun unfold as it comes. 

[1 New Message]

Wille: A surprise 😘

Simon is thrilled at the prospect of a surprise, counting down the minutes until Friday…

***

The promise of Wille’s date carries Simon through the remainder of the week; whining students and stressed parents whose ultra-competitive nature is driving Simon nuts. With the upcoming Holiday concert, Simon is working overtime trying to balance his job with the dynamics that all of these type of events create.

The stress of the week dissipates as Wille picks him up from his classroom afterschool.

Wille cheekily greets Simon from the doorway after politely knocking,

“Hey Handsome, got any plans tonight?”

Simon blushes at the pet-name and does his best to contain his smirk,

“I do, in fact. I have a hot date with the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, and he promised me French fries.”

Wille chuckles, a big belly laugh that is so sincere and pure that Simon can’t help but join in, laughing at his own lame joke.

Wille pretends to think, looking up to space like it had the answers, stroking his beautifully angled jawline in the most adorable way before replying,

“I don’t remember that last part… but that can most certainly be arranged.”

Wille punctuates the sentence with a low chuckle and the twinkle in his eyes is enough to make Simon playfully roll his eyes before packing up his desk to join Wille on their walk back to his place. Wille was sweet enough to remind Simon to pack an overnight bag this morning via text, so they didn’t have to worry about the logistics of getting back and forth between apartments since Simon’s is more out of the way.

Simon grabs his book bag and small overnight tote, dangling it in front of Wille with pride; look what I remembered, smug smile on his face. 

“Sound transit doesn’t wait for anyone, even if they are strikingly beautiful.”

Wille winks at Simon, eyes tracing Simon’s body head to toe with a coy look that makes him feel so utterly desired. Simon feels the blush threatening his bravado, heat pooling in his abdomen and butterflies fluttering in his throat.

Words escape Simon. Rather than fumble through a witty comeback, he brushes his body against Wille’s in the narrow doorway, tantalizing fingers hovering on Wille’s torso as he passes by, teasing. Fully aware of the effect that his small touches have on Wille, Simon looks over his shoulder with a devilish smirk, gauging Wille’s reaction before feigning ignorance,

“Sound transit doesn’t wait for anyone…”

Simon quips as he begins their exit down the corridor, towards the bus stop. The two walk in tandem, exchanging smiles in comfortable conversation about their day until Simon offers up an earbud.

“Want to share? I have some new music I’d love to….”

Simon doesn’t get the chance to finish his sentence before Wille interrupts playfully,

“Yes!”

Wille’s eagerness makes his heart skip a beat. It’s so refreshing to have someone so genuinely interested in learning about him. Wille’s earnest amber eyes leave no room for doubt, a sparkle of sincerity piercing Simon’s lingering gaze.

Simon opens Spotify to his “on repeat” playlist and selects some of his recent favorites for the cue.

1. 4 Thangs by Freddie Gibbs, Hit-Boy, and Big Sean
2. Egypt by Westside Gun and Doechii
3. Lemon Ginger Tea by Nobel Lyfe
4. Arc de Tripmphe by Amine

Wille shoots him a wicked grin and the smile feels radiant, the missing Seattle sunshine that’s been held hostage by this beautiful man’s mouth.

“God, you’re so fucking cool Simon.”

Wille shakes his head in disbelief and Simon can’t help the pride that swells in his chest at the compliment. It’s so meaningful to be able to share music with someone else who finds such value in it.

The walk and bus ride are quick and painless, arriving at Wille’s before long to get organized for the rest of the night- his surprise date.

“Soooooooo when do I get to know what we’re doing for our date tonight?”

Simon moves into Wille’s space, wrapping his arms around his neck, placing happy, lazy kisses on its side. Wille responds by clutching his waist, looping his strong arms around him.

“Hmmm that would ruin the surprise though, wouldn’t it?”

Wille smiles into Simon’s hair,

“Besides if you keep nuzzling into my neck like this, we won’t make it to any surprise.”

The joking undertone makes Simon chuckle hot breath into Wille’s shoulder, melting like putty into Wille’s embrace.  Simon demonstrates tremendous restraint, pulling away with a wicked grin,

“Lead the way, my lavender pretty boy.”

Wille responds in like, all bright and carefree. He picks up a tote bag sitting on his too clean kitchen island, which he must have diligently cleaned while packing this date bag in preparation. The thought of Wille organizing all of this for Simon makes his heart swell with affection. How did he get so lucky?

***

Wille holds Simon’s hand firmly, navigating bus routes and paying Simon’s ticket with a playful smile as they head a direction Simon has never been before, West Seattle. The commute was long, but the company was amazing. They have quiet conversation but mostly enjoy the symphony of characters around them. Simon leans against Wille’s shoulder and allows the gentle sway of the bus to keep them close.

Wille squeezes his knee gently when their stop approaches and the two get off at Alki Beach. Simon has never seen Seattle from this angle before, skyline on full display with an unusually blue bird backdrop. While Simon loves summer, something about the cool, crisp, winter air feels magical with the emerging sparkling holiday lights and bustling downtown that’s untouchable.

The wind bites, sharp against his cheeks but the ocean’s salty kiss is quickly replaced by Wille’s warm lips as he places a quick kiss on Simon’s cheek.

“You’re extra cute when you’re gawking.”

“I can’t believe I’ve never been over here before. It’s beautiful Wille.”

Simon tears his gaze aware from the view and returns Wille’s smile, squeezing his hand.

“So now that we are here, I can tell you the plan for our date.”

Wille is giddy, gently tugging Simon’s hand as they walk on the wide waterfront walkway.

“First, we will stop at Alki Spud Fish and Chips to get my man some French fries. They also have super yummy fried fish if you are hungry for something more substantial. And then we will go to the beach and enjoy a little winter bonfire with wine and charcuterie as the sun sets. Now, I tried calling the Seattle Parks and Recreation to confirm that we were allowed to do a bonfire since it isn’t wildfire season, but they weren’t particularly helpful so if a ranger comes up and yells at us, play along.”

Wille has a mischievous grin on his face that makes Simon chuckle at the boldness.

My sweet Wille has a wild side.

Simon stops in his tracks, pulling Wille into a kiss. He allows the world to dissolve into his periphery as his tongue licks into his mouth and he bites Wille’s bottom lip. He pulls Wille close and lets his passion play out for another moment before pulling back.

Wille chuckles,

“What was that for?”

“For being you. For planning the cutest date I’ve ever been on. For getting me French fries. Need I say more?”

Simon can’t help his wide smile, cheeks already sore from joy.

The two walk in tandem along the boardwalk to Spuds, an iconic joint on Alki beach that has been there since 1935, nearly 100 years. The restaurant is full of character, “freshly” updated in the 1960’s with flair that is reminiscent of a simpler time. They order from the limited menu and wait for their number to be called before bringing their lunchroom style trays filled with food over the restaurant skywalk to the upstairs seating area. The view is gorgeous, and it feels unreal to be eating with a front row seat to the Seattle Skyline. The conversation is easy as they eat their Friday fish fry. Wille’s dainty gold cross peeking out of his jumper feels like a nod to the catholic tradition of fish on Fridays and Simon can’t help but agree that this, them, feels holy.

Simon steals Wille’s tartar sauce and he lets him; cheeky grin and fake good-natured protest aside. Once their bellies are full and the Seattle sun begins its descent far too early, the men head to the beach, a spot far from Alki Boulevard to avoid any unwanted attention from parks employees. Wille picks up a bundle of logs at a convenience store along the way, arranging the logs with the precision of a Boy Scout. If the date ended right now, Simon would be happy. He can’t believe the effort Wille has gone to for him. Every little detail thoughtful orchestrated with an innocent tenderness he’s never experienced before.

Wille brings out several blankets and hand-warmers.

“I know you get cold easily, so I thought these might be helpful.”

The offhanded thoughtfulness is enough to make Simon choke up, emotion threatening to spill over his long lashes; cup overflowing with gratitude.

Simon uses the cold as an excuse to snuggle close. They pass a bottle of wine back and forth, drinking without glasses and watching the sun set and city come to life. All of the cranes are decorated with Christmas lights and the cityscape looks straight out of a kid’s movie. The alpenglow paints the sky a beautiful pink, then blue, then lavender;

“Almost as pretty as my lavender pretty boy…. not quite though.”

Simon’s shameless flirting makes Wille blush the shade of their red blend and they exchange sweet, slow kisses interrupted by smoke once or twice, following their beauty like the old wives’ tale.

When the night sky settles over the space needle and the blankets no longer protect them from the dropping temperature, the two head back to Wille’s apartment.

Simon has a warm buzz that feels like your favorite song on the radio after a long day; contentment settling over him like the lyrics he knows by heart.

Chapter Text

Their last date has been playing on repeat in his mind and Wille can’t wait to see Simon again outside of school. While they text frequently, being with Simon in person does something beautiful to his nervous system, placating all the nervous energy that usually makes him buffer with a sense of calm that reassures his senses.

After their first date, Wille asked Simon out on another date, vowing to treat Simon with the extra special attention and care he deserves. Wille has gone through countless options, considering and reconsidering ideas that feel authentic to who they are while keeping Simon on his toes.

Wille: Hey Simme, I’d like to take you out on a proper date this weekend. Would you be interested and if so, what days/times are you free?

Wille: 👉🏼👈🏼

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Simon has made it clear that he likes Wille back, but there is still a lingering giddiness when he asks Simon out. Fortunately, Wille doesn’t have to sit long with anticipation as Simon responds quickly;

[5 New Messages]

Simon: a proper date???

Simon: i feel spoiled

Simon: hmm let me check my calendar

Simon: turns out im completely free all weekend

Simon: 😉

Confirmation courses through Wille’s veins as he considers all of the options that he has mulled over the past 24 hours. Wille could take him to Alki Beach for a bonfire, Pike Place Market for a coffee, any of the museums downtown, Ballard for window shopping and dinner. The options are endless. In a moment of supreme confidence, Wille puts it all on the line;

Wille: Well without being too forward, I was hoping to do something Friday into Saturday…

Wille: Which would include you spending Friday night at my place, if you wanted to, of course.

Wille: Thoughts?

Wille: Also, to be clear, there is never any expectation or assumptions around sex. I am really loving getting to know you and don’t want you to feel pressure in that way. I just have a two-part date planned so I thought it might make sense for you to just stay over?

Wille: Okay, I’m rambling now.

Wille:🙃

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Wille fiddles with his notebook, opening and shutting it, a feeble attempt to distract him from how he just asked Simon to spend the weekend with him for a multipart date. He wants to make it crystal clear in his messages that he doesn’t have any sexual expectations of Simon or their relationship. He needs Simon to know that he intends to get to know him as a whole person. He like likes Simon and is just excited to spend more quality time getting to know one another.

Fortunately, Simon didn’t allow Wille any time to second guess himself, responding;

[6 New Messages]

Simon: Wille, id love to spend Friday night with you

Simon: and i seriously appreciate you saying that

Simon: i know your intentions and feel so cared for that i am not remotely worried about any sexual expectations

Simon: although id be lying if i said i wasn’t excited to kiss you and snuggle close

Simon: as long as that’s something you wanted too, of course

Simon: do i get to know the date? or is it a surprise? 😏

Wille huffs a sigh of relief, grateful that his message came across well and that Simon feels comfortable enough to express himself honestly, despite their short time knowing one another.

Smug and quite smitten at Simon’s enthusiasm, Wille responds,

Wille: A surprise 😘

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Now… Wille has some planning to do. He can hardly wait until Friday.

***

Wille can hardly contain his excitement when Friday rolls around. He wakes up extra early to pack a picnic bag for their date on Alki later. In an effort to be extra courteous, he packs a couple of thick blankets for his chilly lover; cozy comforter accompanied by snacks to enjoy their bottle of wine with.

Wille researched the appropriate bus routes to get them there with the least amount of exchanges in the shortest time possible.

Wille reviews his mental checklist of pre-date tasks and nods to himself before starting his day.

By the time the final bell rings, Wille is buzzing with anticipation, walking towards Simon’s classroom to pick him up. He gives a quiet knock as he enters the threshold, unable to contain his giddy half-smile half-smirk,

“Hey Handsome, got any plans tonight?”

Simon blushes in response, adorably caught off guard before assuming his cool, practiced confidence,

“I do, in fact. I have a hot date with the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, and he promised me French fries.”

Wille can’t help the chuckle that escapes, guttural and not remotely attractive but dripping in sincerity.

Wille resumes their inside joke, pretending to look into outer space looking to space, stroking his jaw like a philosopher,

“I don’t remember that last part… but that can most certainly be arranged.”

Wille punctuates the sentence with a low chuckle while Simon returns the gesture with a playfully eye roll. He remembers an amazing fish and chips place in that area of West Seattle that he can tack onto their date.

Wille explored Alki beach during his first week here before starting at Garfield. He read about the area on a random tourism website.

Wille notices Simon’s overnight bag neatly tucked behind his desk, a brightly colored baggu dupe that matches Simon’s 1,000 watt smile.

Simon dangles the bag with pride while Wille jokes,

“Sound transit doesn’t wait for anyone, even if they are strikingly beautiful.”

He adds a wink, eyes tracing Simon head to toe, heat involuntarily pooling as he takes in his beautiful date and shamelessly flirts.

Quick witted Simon remains quiet momentarily, closing the distance between them, bag in toe, tracing his fingers across Wille’s pressed shirt. Two can play that game and my god can Simon play that game. He is the most delicious tease and Wille nearly short circuits at the touch. Simon’s eyebrows quirk up, smile following suit before he teases star struck Wille,

“Sound transit doesn’t wait for anyone…” 

The two walk in tandem, exchanging smiles in comfortable conversation about their day until Simon offers up an earbud. The gesture makes Wille feel so seen . Simon offers,

“Want to share? I have some new music I’d love to….”

Wille clumsily interrupts Simon, playful and all too eager to oblige,

“Yes!”

He is so curious to know what is on Simon’s release radar. Music is so deeply personal and the thought that Simon wants to share that version of himself with Wille makes him beam with joy.

Simon opens Spotify to his “on repeat” playlist and selects the following for his cue:

1. 4 Thangs by Freddie Gibbs, Hit-Boy, and Big Sean
2. Egypt by Westside Gun and Doechii
3. Lemon Ginger Tea by Nobel Lyfe
4. Arc de Tripmphe by Amine

Wille immediately recognizes several, deep cut, hip-hop numbers that he is obsessed with as of late. Wille can’t help his smile,

“God, you’re so fucking cool Simon.”

Wille shakes his head in disbelief and gleeful awe.

The walk and bus ride are quick and painless, arriving home before long to pick up his carefully organized date bag. The sweet anticipation continues to build but Simon’s adorable eagerness bubbles through, breaking the silence,

“Soooooooo when do I get to know what we’re doing for our date tonight?”

Simon saunters towards

Wille, moving into his space with ease before wrapping his arms around his neck. He feels Simon’s impossibly soft lips place sweet, lazy kisses on his pulse point. It’s second nature to draw Simon ever closer,

“Hmmm that would ruin the surprise though, wouldn’t it?…Besides if you keep nuzzling into my neck like this, we won’t make it to any surprise.”

Half-joking, half-serious, Wille squeezes Simon’s waist as his tender lover chuckles hot breath into space he was just kissing. Wille loves that he can make Simon laugh.

Without skipping a beat and demonstrating far better restraint, Simon pulls back and waves Wille towards the door,

“Lead the way, my lavender pretty boy.”

Wille grabs his pre-packed tote and wraps his hand around Simon’s.

***

Wille takes the lead, navigating their commute towards West Seattle with excitement coursing through his veins. The notorious Seattle traffic is as terrible as he could have predicted but neither pay it much attention. They enjoy quiet conversation and people watching as they sit nuzzled close. L

Wille squeezes Simon’s knee when their stop approaches and the two get off at Alki Beach. The Seattle skyline is shining silver against the robin’s egg blue backdrop. The cool winter wind bites at their cheeks as they take in the view, shamelessly gawking. The air holds the salt water on its wings, thick and full. Wille feels like his heart may overflow with joy. He places a quick kiss on Simon’s cheek, delighted that Simon is equally enamored by the view,

“You’re extra cute when you’re gawking.”

“I can’t believe I’ve never been over here before. It’s beautiful Wille.”

Simon tears his gaze aware from the view and returns Wille’s smile, squeezing his hand.

“So now that we are here, I can tell you the plan for our date.”

Wille leads Simon, hand in hand, at a casual pace down the wide waterfront walkway.

“First, we will stop at Alki Spud Fish and Chips to get my man some French fries. They also have super yummy fried fish if you are hungry for something more substantial. And then we will go to the beach and enjoy a little winter bonfire with wine and charcuterie as the sun sets. Now, I tried calling the Seattle Parks and Recreation to confirm that we were allowed to do a bonfire since it isn’t wildfire season, but they weren’t particularly helpful so if a ranger comes up and yells at us, play along.”

Wille wiggles his eyebrows in Simon’s direction with a challenging grin that makes Simon chuckle in response.

As the laughter settles between them, Simon pulls Wille into a kiss. While unexpected, Wille settles into their familiar dance, absorbing Simon’s passion and reciprocating it eagerly. He allows Simon to guide their increasing desperation, tongue and teeth, hands and heat, surroundings fading into the background. After entirely too little time, Simon pulls back and Wille can’t help his chuckle,

“What was that for?”

“For being you . For planning the cutest date I’ve ever been on. For getting me French fries. Need I say more?”

Wille is awestruck with just how lucky he feels…

The two walk in tandem along the boardwalk to Spuds, an iconic joint on Alki beach that has been there since 1935, nearly 100 years. The restaurant is full of character, “freshly” updated in the 1960’s with flair that is reminiscent of a simpler time. They order from the limited menu and wait for their number to be called before bringing their lunchroom style trays filled with food over the restaurant skywalk to the upstairs seating area. The view is gorgeous, and it feels unreal to be eating with a front row seat to the Seattle Skyline. The conversation is easy as they eat their Friday fish fry. The entire scene feels like a memory reconfigured, adjusted in a way that heals his inner child who ate fish on Friday’s, aching with loneliness, stuck in a life that didn’t feel like his own. Simon’s presence is a baptism, healing parts of him he didn’t even know were broken.

They eat their food in quiet, content companionship. Simon steals Wille’s tartar sauce and he lets him with fake protests that die on his tongue at the cheeky smile Simon shoots him. Once their bellies are full and the Seattle sun begins its descent far too early, the men head to the beach, a spot far from Alki Boulevard to avoid any unwanted attention from parks employees. Wille picks up a bundle of logs at a convenience store along the way, arranging them with precision. Wille starts to unload his tote, bringing out several blankets and hand-warmers, anticipating the oceanic chill that settles with the nighttime sky.

“I know you get cold easily, so I thought these might be helpful.”

Simon appears emotional but quiet stoicism wins out, sweet smile and squeeze of the hand enough of an answer for them both to understand that the little gesture means a lot.

Wille uses the cold as an excuse to snuggle close. They pass a bottle of wine back and forth, drinking without glasses and watching the sun set and city come to life. All of the cranes are decorated with Christmas lights and the cityscape looks straight out of a kid’s movie. The alpenglow paints the sky a beautiful pink, then blue, then lavender. It’s one of his favorite phenomenons of the Pacific Northwest. Wille is so wrapped up in the view that Simon’s words catch him by surprise,

“Almost as pretty as my lavender pretty boy…. not quite though.”

Wille feels a deep blush pain his cheeks and chest at Simon’s shameless flirting and cheesy comment. Wille isn’t sure who closes the gap first but they exchange sweet, slow kisses as the sky transforms from cotton candy pastels to a dark denim hues.

When the night sky settles over them, stretching between mountain ranges and painting the city in glittering darkness that leaves them both shivering, they head back to Wille’s apartment.

Simon settles next to Wille on the bus and the perfection of the evening settles over him like the warmth of the wine they shared. His body buzzes with electricity at every point of their bodies snuggled close.

Chapter Text

They arrive back to Wille’s place, hand in hand after snuggling close the entire bus ride. The energy between them is playful with lingering touches and intentional brushes, Simon can’t help flirting with his handsome date, pulling him in as they pass the threshold.

Simon throws his arms around Wille’s neck, clinging onto him while Wille wraps his full around Simon’s waist, tote bag heavy on his back, pushing them ever closer. Simon doesn’t dare close the gap left, eyeing Wille with desire and allowing the tip of his nose to trace his jaw and upper lip. He can feel Wille’s hot breath quicken, smell the faint red blend they shared linger heavy between them. Simon smiles into the moment before whispering into Wille’s ear.

“Shall we get you warmed up?”

Simon’s hands trace down the sides of Wille’s neck with careful pressure before he allows his palms to move down his chest. His eyes are wide, desire pooling as his pupils dilate and lids lower in hunger.

“I could take care of you right here, get on my knees for you and suck you off. Or you could fuck my mouth, taking whatever you need from me baby.”

Simon can see the goosebumps erupting on Wille’s neck, well aware of the power of his words as the man’s grip tightens around his waist. Simon continues his dirty talk, wanting and desperate to watch Wille unravel in whatever was he wants, needs.

“I could go down on you again, eating you out before I fuck you so good you fall asleep.”

Simon hears a sharp intake of breath with a low whine upon exhale as he peppers gentle, wet kisses on his neck and ear. He takes the lobe into his mouth, biting it gently before sucking it sweetly.

“Or you could fuck me….”

Simon rolls his hips against Wille’s tall, strong frame, pressing his hardening erection against his hip and thigh, eliciting a groan from his lover,

“Would you like that? I can take your giant cock? Hard and fast? Or we can go slow and steady? Whatever way you want me, you can have me. You always make me feel so good, Wille. You take such good care of me, baby. I just want you.”

Simon’s cock is now fully hard, twitching at the possibilities between them, waiting for Wille to respond.

“Fuck, Simme. You’re so fucking hot.”

Wille closes the gap, pulling Simon’s head close with a sharp tug of his curls and kissing him deeply. His lips are passionate, searching and yearning with each movement and flick of his tongue. Simon takes it in stride, painfully turned on and desperate to please Wille.

“I need you, Simon. I need to feel you around me. You’re always so tight around my cock. I need to feel all of you tonight.”

Simon’s heart skips a beat at the earnest confession and praise,

“You have all of me, babe. Take what’s yours. Fuck me.”

Simon’s words must have ignited something deep in Wille, moaning into their open mouth kiss, Wille drops the tote bag and turns them pushing Simon up, against the door. The pressure feels divine as Wille slots his leg between Simons and presses him into a silencing kiss. Wille grinds forward and their erections rub against one another through far too many layers of fabric. Simon is so lost in the moment, the lust and heat as Wille pins him to the door and takes and takes and takes.

Simon is so turned on as Wille’s large hands find his neck with just enough pressure to make him see stars as he writhes against his strong physique. Wille’s voice is husky and low,

“You want me to fill you up, baby? Fuck your mouth before I fuck your hole?”

Simon groans, nodding into their kiss, pulling Wille closer before lowering himself to the ground. Wille’s eyes follow him as he sits on his own knees, kneeling between Wille and the front door. Simon reaches for Wille’s pants, waiting for an affirmative nod before unbuttoning and lowering the zipper with patient anticipation. Simon’s own cock is throbbing at the thought. He loves sucking cock, making someone feel so good in such a vulnerable way. He is excited for Wille to fuck his throat, using his mouth to make himself feel so good.

Wille’s hard cock springs free as Simon lowers his underwear. Wille has such a beautiful dick, large and thick enough to satiate Simon in every way he needs without any of the arrogance that comes with such an endowment. Wille is stroking Simon’s curls in a way that feels deeply intimate as he stares into his lust filled eyes. Simon reciprocates the sweet stare through his full lashes, mouthwatering and saliva gathering in his cheeks as he teases Wille’s tip with a gentle kiss before opening his mouth wide. He holds his tongue out with need and brings his hands to Wille’s hips, urging him forward. Wille’s fingers stay laced in Simon’s curls and before he indulges in Simon’s waiting mouth, he whispers,

“I want you to tap my leg three times if it’s too much and I will stop immediately, no questions asked, mmkay?”

Simon nods, heat pooling behind his navel, eager to be so close, feel Wille so intimately,

“I need words, Simon”

Breaking from his reverie, Simon responds,

“Yes, I understand. Please, Wille.”

His desperation must be obvious, Wille’s lips curling into a coy smile while Simon stays; waiting, open.

“God you are so beautiful, Simon.”

Wille’s dark eyes are barely visible through heavy lids, brown irises blown black with wide pupils, rolling back into his head as he pushes his cock into Simon’s mouth.

Simon relaxes his jaw and throat, allowing the sensation of Wille’s cock heavy on his tongue to ground him in the moment. Saliva coats his length as he pushes deeper and deeper until his tip hits the back of his throat. Simon gags silently, curling his lips around Wille’s length as he pulls the shaft back out. Simon hollows his cheek, sucking without teeth as the salty taste of Wille’s precum mixes with saliva. His downy hair tickles Simon’s nose but the sensation is quickly forgotten as Wille begins to fuck Simon’s mouth, using him just how he begged. The pace slowly increases, until it becomes filthy. The noises Wille is making only push Simon further, taking as much of him as possible, moaning around his cock with each thrust that makes him gag.

Simon doesn’t even notice how he’s grinding and rutting his own throbbing erection against nothing until Wille slows his pace to say,

“You can touch yourself, baby. I want you to feel good.”

The direction makes Simon feral, unbuttoning his jeans and lowering his zipper until his aching cock springs free.

Wille takes Simon’s hand from its perch on his left hip and holds it in front of him, over his head towards Wille’s navel. Simon looks up to follow the movement, met with Wille’s gorgeous lips dropping spit into his palm to use as lubricant to touch himself.

Simon can’t help moaning around Wille’s cock, bringing his spit-soaked hand to his aching erection. The relief is everything and not enough. Wille resumes his pace, fucking Simon’s mouth while he messily fucks into his own hand. Wille looks like an angel, so fucking hot, lost in their combined pleasure.

Wille reciprocates Simon’s feeling, increasingly vocal as they chase pleasure;

“God, you look so beautiful”

“Your fucking perfect, Simme”

“So good baby, taking me so well”

Each compliment is dripping with an earnest sincerity that makes Simon feel so thoroughly seen and desired.

Simon’s pace is relentless, matching Wille’s thrusts… but it isn’t enough. He can’t help the whine of frustration, needing more. He needs Wille inside him. As if reading his mind, the ever-attentive lover he is, Wille taps Simon’s cheek, gently pulling him off his dick.

Simon is confused at first, worried he did something wrong or accidentally used his teeth on Wille.

“Are you okay?”

The question comes out gargled, throat raw with use.

Wille gently chuckles, pulling Simon off the floor and up to his chest.

“Baby, I am so good. You are beautiful, Simon.”

The compliment is punctuated with a swipe of Wille’s thumb across Simon’s tear-stained cheeks before kissing under each eye. Wille continues,

“I was about to come so I needed to stop if I wanted any chance of fucking you properly. I could tell you were getting close and… well, I didn’t want you to have to wait any longer, if that’s still something you want.”

Simon’s confusion transforms into adoration. He can hardly believe how attentive and considerate Wille is, even in the throes of his own passion. Words evade him and Simon responds with a needy, passionate kiss hoping that Wille can read between the lines,

Thank you for seeing me

Thank you for prioritizing me

Thank you, thank you, thank you

Their lips continue their familiar dance as Wille grips Simon tighter, thumb digging into his hip in the most delicious way as he blindly guides them both back to the bedroom.

Wille guides Simon back onto the bed as smoothly as he can with both of them half-dressed and sickeningly turned on. Simon’s entire body is tingling with desire, and he can already feel his hole pucker in anticipation of Wille fucking him.

Simon feels desperate, drawing Wille closer by wrapping his legs around his back as they kiss. Simon can feel Wille’s erection against his own as they grind, messy and dirty; both seeking pleasure in the other’s pliant body.

Wille doesn’t make him wait long, grabbing his lube from the bedside table before coating his fingers to open Simon up.

Wille’s wet fingers tease his taint before entering his tight heat to the first knuckle. Simon can’t help the sound that escapes him while Wille kisses his neck and fingers him open. Simon is panting into the small space between them, whispering praise into Wille’s hair, grinding against his long, delicate fingers. The stretch is familiar; better than his own, shorter fingers but not as good Wille’s gorgeous cock. Simon can smell Wille; warm cologne and clean detergent with a hint of sweat, surrounding him in a way that is starting to feel like home. Simon doesn’t want to wait anymore. He needs Wille.

“Baby, I’m ready. I need you, Wille.”

Wille makes the most beautiful groan at Simon’s request. To reinforce his point, Simon begs,

“Please baby, take me.”

Simon’s desperation for release is growing by the moment and luckily Wille springs into action, removing his fingers to lube his cock. Wille takes control, spreading Simon’s legs open before lining himself up. Wille’s cock is pink and throbbing just above his aching hole. They are face to face as Wille teases his tip in, stretching Simon inch by inch until he bottoms out, flush and full. The sensation as Wille’s tip nudges his prostate deep inside makes Simon’s moan loud and unfiltered. Without wasting any time, Wille folds Simon in half, placing his knees over his shoulders and building a steady pace as he drags his cock in and out, thrusting deep to hit that sensitive bundle of nerves every time.

Wille is fucking into Simon, grunting and groaning with exertion as he praises Simon,

“Fuck, you’re so tight Simon.”

“Taking me so well.”

“Fucking perfect, whining around my cock, taking everything I give you.”

Simon can feel his orgasm approaching at Wille’s relentless pace, body flexing as the pressure builds, pressure valve about to release at Wille’s doing.

“Who do you belong to Simon?”

The question comes out pleading with an undertone of authority. Wille’s brow is furrowed in pleasure, his balls slapping the back of Simon’s exposed ass, sweat accumulating between them as they both quiver and heave and moan.

“You, Wille.”

Simon can barely get the words out between grunts and moans.

“I belong… to you.”

A promise that sends both men over the edge, simultaneous orgasms erupting as Wille cums deep inside Simon while Simon shoots streams of thick white cum between them.

Simon’s entire body is shaking at the overstimulation, finally satiated after so long of waiting, wanting. The release, exactly what he so desperately needed. Wille slows his pace, cock softening after fucking Simon through his orgasm so skillfully.

Simon is speechless, filled completely, mind beautifully blank as he holds Wille close, unwilling to let him go just yet. Wille obliges, nuzzling ever closer, placing gentle kisses on his chest, neck, and jaw until their lips meet in sweet symphony.

“Wille that was…”

Simon can’t finish his sentence, so overwhelmed with gratitude at every intimate moment he shares with Wille. He feels so safe, seen, loved.

“Too much?”

Wille asks, voice steady but shoulders tensing as he anxiously awaits Simon’s response. Simon can’t help but gently chuckle, warm and reassuring,

“Everything, Wille. That was everything.”

Any underlying anxiety disappears from Wille’s shoulders as he melts into Simon’s embrace, relaxing into the shared vulnerability. Wille closes the gap, giddy smile finding Simon’s lips in a tender kiss that feels like a promise.

Chapter Text

They arrive back to Wille’s place, hand in hand after snuggling close the entire bus ride. Wille feels the electricity between the two of them in every lingering touch. Wille’s skin prickles with anticipation when Simon pulls him in by the waist the second they are through the door.

Simon throws his arms around Wille’s neck while Wille wraps his own around Simon’s narrow waist. His tote bag lingers, heavy on his back, pushing them even closer. Simon’s lips are dangerously close, teasing him softly as his nose traces Wille’s jaw line towards his lips. The action is somehow equally sexy and sweet. Simon doesn’t close the gap left, hovering in the space between them. The cheap red blend they shared lingers on his tongue, eager to replace it with a taste of Simon. Wille notices a coy smile before he whispers,

“Shall we get you warmed up?”

Simon’s hands trace down the sides of Wille’s neck with careful pressure before his palms linger on his broad chest. Simon’s eyes are heavy, pupils blow with desire as he eyes Wille’s lip he’s unconsciously biting,

“I could take care of you right here, get on my knees for you and suck you off. Or you could fuck my mouth, taking whatever you need from me baby.”

Wille can’t help the shiver that runs down his spine, goosebumps erupting on his neck, littering the sensitive skin. Wille squeezes his waist, already hard from Simon’s words.

“I could go down on you again, eating you out before I fuck you so good you fall asleep.”

Wille sucks a sharp breath in, allowing a low whine to escape as the words rest between them. Simon is peppering gentle, wet kisses on his neck and ear. He takes Wille’s lobe into his mouth, biting it gently before sucking it sweetly.

“Or you could fuck me….”

Simon continues the sweet torture, rolling his hips against Wille’s frame, pressing his own hardening erection against Wille’s hip and thigh, eliciting a groan from his lover,

“Would you like that? I can take your giant cock? Hard and fast? Or we can go slow and steady? Whatever way you want me, you can have me. You always make me feel so good, Wille. You take such good care of me, baby. I just want you. ”

Simon’s cock is now fully hard, throbbing against the thin fabric of Wille’s hip, twitching at the possibilities, awaiting Wille’s response.

“Fuck, Simme. You’re so fucking hot.”

Wille closes the gap, pulling Simon’s head close with a sharp tug of his curls and kissing him deeply. Wille kisses Simon with a filthy determination, desperate to show him how much he cares. His lips are passionate, searching and yearning with each response of Simon’s tongue. Wille isn’t above begging,

“I need you, Simon. I need to feel you around me. You’re always so tight around my cock. I need to feel all of you tonight.”

Without missing a beat, Simon responds,

“You have all of me, babe. Take what’s yours. Fuck me.”

Did Simon really just say that?

Oh, fuck.

The heat between them turns into a rolling boil as Wille drops his tote back and pushes Simon up against the door. Every time Wille think’s ‘there is no way Simon could get any hotter’, he goes and proves him wrong with dirty talk so intimate he can hardly contain his emotions. Wille can’t help the moan that escapes, desperate with want and need as he slots his leg between Simon’s, grinding their erections together through far too many clothes.

Simon is pliant under his touch, so responsive to every tug of his tongue and shift of his hips, responding with the sexiest whimpers and drawn out moans. His voice is always beautiful but the way it sounds in the throes of passion is gorgeous. Wille is in complete physical control, taller and stronger than Simon, but they both know who the real boss is. Wille continues their dirty banter,

“You want me to fill you up, baby? Fuck your mouth before I fuck your hole?”

Simon groans, nodding into their kiss, pulling Wille closer before lowering himself to the ground. Wille watches Simon in awe as he knees in front of Wille with hungry eyes, kiss bitten lips, and an obvious bulge in his pants.

Simon reaches for Wille’s pants, waiting for an affirmative nod before unbuttoning and lowering the zipper. He knows he’s teasing Wille with his slow movements, determined to draw out their pleasure. Simon looks absolutely beautiful, determined brow with a flirtatious sparkle in his eyes as he finally free’s his aching cock. Wille needs to touch his lover, the soft ringlets on the crown of his head, his king on his knees for him. He returns Simon’s stare with lust and adoration as Simon leans forward to kiss Wille’s leaking tip before opening his mouth wide, desperate to be filled. Wille feels Simon’s hips urge him forward which is all the encouragement he needs to start,

“I want you to tap my leg three times if it’s too much and I will stop immediately, no questions asked, mmkay?”

Simon nods but Wille doesn’t let him off so easy,

“I need words, Simon”

Broken from his reverie, Simon responds,

“Yes, I understand. Please, Wille.”

The need behind Simon’s tone makes him feel like the luckiest man alive.

“God you are so beautiful, Simon.”

Wille can’t help the compliment as he pushes his cock forward into Simon’s warm and waiting mouth. The wet heats makes Wille’s eyes roll back as Simon grips his hips and pushes him forward until his cock head touches the back of his throat. Simon gags silently, curling his lips around Wille’s length as he pulls the shaft back out. Simon hollows his cheek, sucking without teeth as the salty taste of Wille’s precum mixes with saliva. The closeness of Simon’s mouth on his most vulnerable part of his body feels like everything; dirty, intimate, sweet, and sexy all rolled into one.

With Simon’s enthusiastic consent, Wille’s pace picks up, becoming filthy before long. He can’t help the sounds he’s making, lost in pleasure at Simon on his knees before him, pleasuring him with such eagerness. It makes Wille feral when Simon moans around his cock, the vibration giving him goosebumps.

Wille opens his eyes to watch as Simon ruts, grinding against the air, his erection untouched but painfully obvious. Wille slows his pace to remind Simon,

“You can touch yourself, baby. I want you to feel good.”

Wille takes Simon’s hand from its perch on his left hip and holds it in front of him, over Simon’s head near his belly button. Simon looks up, doe eyed with such adoration that Wille can’t help but smile before spitting into Simon’s palm.

Simon makes the most gorgeous moan as he places his spit soaked hand on his aching cock while he opens his mouth wide for Wille to continue. The scene is messy and dirty in the best way possible. Simon looks like a fucking angel, kneeling in front of Wille, taking his cock like a prayer while he fucks into his own hand.

Wille tells him just that;

“God, you look so beautiful”

“Your fucking perfect, Simme”

“So good baby, taking me so well”

Wille means each compliment deep in his core, desperate to tell Simon just how much he means in this moment.

Simon is adorably flushed and frustrated, whining around Wille’s length. Wille is on the edge of cumming, using every last ounce of restraint to tap Simon’s cheek, gently pulling him off his dick.

Simon sweetly asks,

“Are you okay?”

The question comes out gargled, throat raw with use.

Wille can’t help his own chuckle, blissed out and thoroughly enjoying himself . He pulls Simon off the floor and up to his chest.

“Baby, I am so good. You are beautiful, Simon.”

Wille wipes Simon’s blushing tear stained cheeks before kissing under each eye, treating him with the reverence and complete adoration he deserves before continuing,

“I was about to come so I needed to stop if I wanted any chance of fucking you properly. I could tell you were getting close and… well, I didn’t want you to have to wait any longer, if that’s still something you want.”

Simon’s confusion dissipates and his eyes fill with sweet desire that makes his stomach flutter. Simon remains quiet and lets their bodies do the talking, kissing Wille with a renewed determination and neediness.

Their lips continue their familiar dance and Wille can’t help but direct Simon down his apartment hallway and into his bedroom.

Wille guides Simon back onto the bed as smoothly as he can with both of them half-dressed and sickeningly turned on. Wille’s entire body tenses in anticipation, eagerness coursing through his veins with determined persistence.

Simon wraps his legs around Wille’s back as they kiss. Their erections chase pleasure in every grind of their hips, small movements that render Wille a moaning mess.

Wille doesn’t make him wait long, grabbing his lube from the bedside table before coating his fingers to open Simon up.

Wille’s wet fingers tease his taint before entering Simon’s perfect hole to the first knuckle. Simon’s moans reverberate off of the bedroom walls, encouraging Wille with each flick of the wrist and twist of his fingers. Simon is panting into the small space between them, whispering praise into Wille’s hair. Wille will never tire of Simon’s voice. Hearing Simon in the most intimate moments of pleasure makes him feral with desire. He takes in every square inch of the man, all citrus and warm sandalwood mixed with sweet sweat from their passion. Wille could go on and on and on but Simon interjects his silent observations,

“Baby, I’m ready. I need you, Wille. Please baby, take me.”

Wille can’t contain his own desperation anymore, needing Simon clenching around him to make him feel good. Wille springs into action, removing his fingers to lube his cock. Wille takes control, spreading Simon’s legs open before lining himself up. Wille’s cock is throbbing just above Simon’s dark pink, clenching hole. They are face to face as Wille teases his tip in, stretching Simon inch by inch until he bottoms out, flush and full. The sensation as Wille feels Simon’s prostate along his tip makes is heavenly, eliciting an even hotter moan from Simon as he drags his cock in and out against him. Without wasting any time, Wille folds Simon in half, placing his knees over his shoulders and building a steady pace, thrusting deep to hit that sensitive bundle of nerves every time.

Wille is fucking into Simon, grunting and groaning with exertion as utters his own thoughts, out loud,

“Fuck, you’re so tight Simon.”

“Taking me so well.”

“Fucking perfect, whining around my cock, taking everything I give you.”

Wille feels his body spiraling into pleasure, consuming him with each passing second as Simon squeezes him perfectly,

“Who do you belong to Simon?”

The question comes out before Wille can filter himself, pleading with an honesty reserved only for those he loves. Wille’s brow is furrowed in pleasure, his balls slapping the back of Simon’s exposed ass, sweat accumulating between them as they both quiver and heave and moan.

“ You, Wille. I belong… to you.”

A promise that sends both men over the edge, simultaneous orgasms erupting as Wille cums deep inside Simon while Simon’s untouched cock releases between them.

Wille can feel Simon’s body shake around him, a good sign he’s learning as they continue to explore one another. Wille slows his pace, cock softening after such an intense orgasm. Simon is milking him dry and he wishes he could stay surrounded by his lover forever.

Wille snuggles into Simon’s tight embrace, nuzzling ever closer, placing gentle kisses on his chest, neck, and jaw until their lips meet in sweet symphony.

“Wille that was…”

Anxiety rears its ugly head, threatening Wille in a way that’s all too familiar yet equally disheartening,

“Too much?”

He maintains a steady voice in his question despite the tension rising in his neck and shoulders. Wille is determined not to crack under the pressure, eyes searching for an honest answer.

Simon can’t help but gently chuckle, warm and reassuring,

“ Everything, Wille. That was everything.”

Wille can’t help the smile that splits his face, relief washing over him as Simon’s sincere eyes meet him in quiet reassurance.  Wille closes the gap, giddy smile finding Simon’s lips in a tender kiss that feels like a promise.

You are everything, Simon.

You are my everything.

Chapter Text

Simon can’t tell what time it is when he wakes up, sticky and content in Wille’s arms. The moon is playing hide and seek with the low hanging clouds, obscuring any persistent stars from view meanwhile the only sound between them is the soft breaths of his lover.

As if on cue, Wille shifts beneath him, drawing Simon impossibly closer while making the sweetest grunts and groans as their weight shifts.

Sleep urges him to relax, ignoring the mess they’ve made and enjoying the intimacy of the moment. Simon traces faint patterns on Wille’s freckled chest, connecting the constellations that he imagines are hiding just outside of his window.

***

The morning greets Simon with shy fervor as the sun warms the skin that isn’t being touched by Wille. His lover is propped in bed next to him, hip and thighs flush to Simon’s front as he lays half on top of him. Simon is a koala bear and Wille is the bamboo tree. Wille is on his phone but rather than scrolling social media, he is in the notes app. Simon can’t help his quiet groan as he stretches across the man, pulling him tighter by the waist and forcing Wille’s attention away from his task as hand.

“Good morning, sleepy head”

Simon chuckles at the cliche and smiles into the embrace.

“Good morning to you too… but it seems like you’ve been up for a while.”

Simon allows his hand to move from its perch on his waist to the duvet over Wille’s nakedness. Simon can feel Wille’s cock twitch as he cuddles closer, placing the gentlest of pressure to Wille’s morning wood.

Simon kisses Wille’s exposed chest, tracing his nose along his defined pecs and hard nipples.  Simon can feel Wille’s breath shutter, controlled and even against his loose, messy curls as he places even more pressure on Wille’s dick, tracing the shaft with his musician’s hands.

“Have you been thinking about me this morning, Wille?”

Simon knows the question is rhetorical, still reveling in the whiney nod Wille responds with.

“What were we doing?”

Simon further probes, taking his hand off Wille’s quickly growing erection, and placing it on his neck. Simon allows the gentlest of pressure, rubbing his jaw line and pulse point, awaiting a response. 

Wille clears his voice, Adams apple bobbing and hooded eyes meeting Simon’s gaze with desire before responding,

“I was thinking about…”

Each sentence is abbreviated with deep breaths as Wille fights to maintain his composure while Simon relentlessly teases him. 

“…everything. I want to try everything with you.”

Simon rewards him with a gentle tug on ear and squeeze around his waist.

“I want you to fuck me in the morning, plug me up with your cum so you can have your way with me later that day. I want to eat you out, feel your tender rim on my tongue and taste my own cum oozing out from fucking you the night before. I want to make out with you like teenagers, cumming just from rutting against one another. I want you make me yours, any way you’d like, using my body as an instrument for your pleasure. I want you in every way, shape, and form.”

Simon’s mouth is dry and ears buzzing as his own erection throbs against Wille’s thigh,

“Fuck, Wille, I love that dirty mouth of yours.”

Simon moves his fingers from his dainty clavicle to his rosy lips, swiping his thumb against the lower half until they part, an invitation that Simon is too turned on to ignore. Simon advances his thumb into Wille’s warm, inviting mouth. His lovers tongue kisses the intrusion with intention,

“I am going to sit on your face. I want to feel that pretty tongue fuck me the way you did last night. And then? If you’re a good boy, I’ll fill you up, fuck you into the mattress so when we walk to get coffee, all you’ll be able to think about is how I fucked your tight ass.”

Wille moans around Simon’s finger, nodding vigorously before verbalizing what Simon already knows,

“Want that, want you.”

Simon takes control, loving how every intimate moment they share is so balanced, a dance back and forth as they seek to please one another. Simon props himself up, taking his weight off Wille to allow him to get more comfortable in the bed before turning around.

Simon straddles Wille’s knees, looking back at the man with a devilish grin until Wille makes grabby hands for Simon to sit on his face.

“Come here, baby. I’m ready. I want to taste you.”

Who is Simon not to indulge Wille? What kind of boyfriend would he be if he didn’t crawl back until his hard dick is on Wille’s chest and his hole is lined up with Wille’s mouth. He feels Wille’s large hands on his hips, spreading his cheeks to find his oozing hole, tender and just slightly swollen from the beating it took last night. The last words he hears before Wille licks his taint is,

“God, your fucking gorgeous, Simon.”

The sensation is just on the right side of over-stimulating, intimate in a way he would never ordinarily indulge with someone he’s known for so little time. He feels Wille kiss his rim with sloppy reverence, advancing his tongue with persistence that makes Simon gasp and whine into the small bedroom.

Wille supports his body while he indulges in the pleasure, orgasm quickly approaching. Simon manages,

“Fuck, Wille I need you.”

Unwilling to wait for a response, Simon pivots, lifting his ass into the air before pivoting to one side so he can be face to face with Wille. He doesn’t think twice, drawing Wille into a slow but deep kiss, eager to demonstrate his love.

“Still want me to fuck you?”

The question must have caught Wille off guard, confusion evident in the way his eyebrows furrow. Simon further clarifies,

“I just want to make sure this is something you want Wille. I can get a little carried away with my dirty talk and never want you to feel pressured to do anything.”

His words untied the knot of confusion between them, Wille’s expression shifts from confusion to genuine appreciation with a hint of amusement.

“Oh yes, Simon. I want this. I want you to fuck me, like so bad.”

Wille giggles with giddy anticipation.

“….but I appreciate you checking in. That’s hot.”

Simon smiles at the compliment, delighted to impress Wille with the kind of consideration he deserves. Simon pulls him in for another gentle, reverent kiss before directing Wille,

“On your belly babe, I want you lay down and spread your knees wide for me so I can open you up before I fuck you.”

Wille is quick to assume the described position, shifting his long body in front of Simon with such sweet attention to detail. Wille looks gorgeous like that, such a strong man, offering himself up so vulnerably is so fucking hot that Simon can hardly believe he gets to be a part of such a moment. He puts his hands on Wille’s hips, rubbing soft circles on his back and ass before retrieving lube from the nightstand. The pop of the cap makes Simon shiver with anticipation as he generously coats his fingers, warming it before bringing it to Wille’s taint. Simon’s fingers trace his hole, puckering at anticipation and beautifully pink. He can hear Wille’s breath hitch at the sensation, feel his body rock back towards Simon’s hand in an effort to keep him close. Simon doesn’t make him wait long, entering him with one wet finger, drawing the most angelic moan from Wille as he adjusts to the intrusion. They continue this back-and-forth prep dance until Simon can fit three fingers comfortably and Wille is begging for more.

Simon remains hard as a rock, cock throbbing with every beautiful whine Wille makes when Simon touches his prostate. Begging doesn’t usually do it for him but listening to Wille demand to be fucked nearly makes Simon cum.

When Simon enters Wille with careful coordination, his mind goes delightfully blank, empty of any residual thoughts that aren’t Wille, Wille, Wille.

Wille is so tight around Simon’s cock, grounding him in a way that feels so euphoric he nearly forgets to move until Wille shifts his hips beneath him.

“Fuck, Wille you feel so amazing.”

“You are such a good boy, taking me so well.”

“You make me feel whole, baby. It’s just you, it will always be you, Wille.”

Simon can’t stop his dirty confessions. He knows they are probably too much, but he doesn’t care.

He needs Wille to know how much this means. How much Wille means to him. Simon’s mind is running wild, faster than the pace he’s trying to maintain as he fucks into Wille.

Wille wants him without the glitz or glamour, on a normal weekend morning; hair messy, dried sweat, morning breath and cum stains. Not only so, but Wille wants sleepy bus trips and cheap take out and boring after work routines and shared playlists.

All of the emotion starts to bubble up, threatening to overflow in tears of gratitude but he pushes off the threat, holds Wille close as they make love.

It’s making love, isn’t it?

Wille moans are muffled by the duvet, but Simon can tell he’s cumming by the way his body clenches around him, spilling into the mattress below them while Simon spills his own seed deep inside his lover.

Barely above a whisper, Wille speaks into the quiet between them, still connected in their labored breaths,

“I love you, Simon.”

He loves me.

Simon’s ears are ringing, whole body tingling after such a strong orgasm, processing Wille’s words while ignoring his own anxiety and self-doubts. His stomach flips at the thought and Wille’s brave confession emboldens him further. Simon carefully pulls out, earning a grunt from both men,

“Wille, baby, will you turn around for me?”

Wille does so begrudgingly, slowly as if he is trying to avoid Simon.

Maybe he didn’t mean to say it?

Maybe he was just caught up in the moment?

Maybe it was too soon?

Simon doesn’t indulge his anxious thoughts, looking at Wille with complete adoration and giddiness as the flushed man returns his gaze. Simon reaches out, needing to feel his soft, textured skin in his hand. He caresses Wille gently, drawing his neck forward so that their foreheads are resting against one another. They are breathing each other’s air as Simon holds Wille close,

“Say it again.”

Simon opens his eyes and separates their foreheads, Wille reciprocates his intense stare after a deep, calming breath in,

“I love you, Simon.”

Simon can’t help his smile; eyes crinkling with delight at hearing those three words repeated by the most beautiful man he has ever had the pleasure of knowing. Sincere brown eyes and fading freckles and crooked teeth; the gentlest soul with the most beautiful wrapping. They have so much to learn about one another, but Simon is absolutely sure about one thing,

“I love you too, Wille”

Wille’s eyes sparkle like polished amber and they embrace in a hug that is filled with emotion and promise of the future.

***

Simon is finishing washing his hair while Wille dries off after a much-needed shower. He hears Wille’s chuckle, low and quiet but obvious in the echoing tiled bathroom. Curiosity gets the best of him,

“What are you laughing at, babe?”

“You’d think we’re lesbians the way we’re saying, ‘I love you’ on our second official date.”

Simon can’t help the loud laugh that escapes, cheeks already sore from the amount of smiling he’s done the last twenty-four hours. Wille joins in, carefree in a way that feels so sacred he wants to preserve it.

Wille keeps him company as he finishes up in the shower, handing him a plush towel to dry off with upon exiting.

Getting ready together feels domestic. He watches Wille go through his skin care routine with more precision than he has ever considered while he lays out clothes from his overnight bag,

“Will you help me pick out what to wear?”

Wille gives him an amused grin as he eyes the outfit options neatly laid out.

“Before you say anything, you were the one who insisted this two-part date be a surprise, remember? What’s a girl to do?”

“Touché, Simon. You have a point there.”

Wille walks up behind Simon, allowing his still damp bare chest to touch Simon’s back while he snuggles into the crook of Simon’s neck. Simon pulls Wille’s arms tight around his torso, nuzzling into the gesture with such fondness. Wille starts,

“Well first, we are going to get coffee for our walk down to pike place market. And then we’d take our time exploring all of the little booths and shops there. I know it’s stupid busy on Saturdays but I also kind of love that busyness. And once we’re ready to eat I have a couple ideas depending on what kind of food you’re craving. I also thought we could grab some ingredients to bring back to the apartment for later?”

Simon hums along to the laundry list of their sweet itinerary and cannot believe he is so lucky.

“That sounds amazing, Wille. I can’t believe you planned all of this for me.”

Wille places a chaste kiss on Simon’s still damp curls before squeezing him once more,

“You’re worth it.”

And while those words stir emotion deep down in Simon’s core, he doesn’t allow his anxiety to take hold. Most people mistake healing as a result of large, grand gestures or novella length proclamations but from Simon’s perspective, that is rarely the case. More often than not, healing occurs in quiet moments like this where matter of fact truths are shared in comfortable silence.

If frustration feels like death by a thousand paper cuts, love feels like healing by a thousand simple truths.

Simon picks a pair of casual jeans, baggy and comfy when paired with a long sleeve shirt and jumper. He wears his well-loved sneakers and old Patagonia beanie to keep his still damp curls from chilling him to the core.

Wille dresses in like, well loved tan Carhartt pants and a black fleece quarter zip with high top converse and another simple assortment of rings and accessories that scream PNW. He looks unfairly attractive, per usual.

Once they are both dressed and prepared for any weather with jackets to match, the two step into the sleepy Seattle morning hand in hand.

“So, what were you writing this morning? Is that a part of your everyday routine or just sometimes?”

Simon is idly stroking the back of Wille’s hand with his thumb, awaiting his answer as they walk,

“Well, this morning I was just writing a little prose. I’m always writing little lines I think of when I’m feeling inspired. I usually just run with them and piece meal them together.”

Simon can’t see his eyes, but Wille’s tone is so sincere and humble it makes his own heart swell with pride,

“Do you think I could read something of yours sometime? I’m not well versed in poetry, but I’d really like to read anything you’d be willing to share.”

“I’d like that. Actually…”

Wille pauses, air pregnant with a statement he is carefully considering before sharing it with Simon,

“I wrote a little something about you. A poem. It’s not fancy or anything but maybe I could share that one with you?”

Simon can hardly believe what he’s hearing. Wille wrote a poem about him. He has experienced flattery in many forms, but nothing could have prepared him for how it feels to be someone’s muse, inspiration, a fucking poem.

“Are you serious, Wille? Of course I want to hear it. That is….so fucking nice.”

Simon tugs on Wille’s arm, pulling him close to kiss him on the cheek. The gesture takes Wille by surprise but the shy smile that blooms in conjunction with the blush rising to his cheeks, pink like the early morning sun after a thunderstorm, feels adorably innocent.

“I’m holding you to it, you know?”

Simon stops in his tracks, keeping the bit going, pointing in the direction that they came from,

“Should we go back now? So, I don’t have to wait?”

Wille’s adorably timid expression shifts into pure joy, head thrown back, laughing in a carefree way that makes Simon absolutely giddy with delight. He loves making him laugh, seeing Wille unabashed, unapologetic and unfiltered.

Simon lets the joke ride on their shared laughter as Wille pulls him forward toward downtown. They resume their walk towards coffee in comfortable conversation about their weeks, layers peeling back with the safe space they create for one another.

When they arrive at the coffee shop and Simon tries to pay, Wille recites one of their inside jokes,

“Let your boyfriend pay, honey.”

He even has the audacity to WINK. If Simon wasn’t so determined to enjoy their wholesome date morning, he would have taken him somewhere private where he can knock that smirk right off his face but alas.

The barista calls out their order and the two retrieve their drinks, holding their hot beverages close as they continue their route to the market. The misty Seattle fog is burning off as they near the waterfront, one block at a time.

Simon can tell they are getting close, parking lots full and folks bustling about with their reusable grocery bags. No matter the season, the iconic market entry is beautiful. He’s had the pleasure of seeing it with bright, colorful tulips in the spring and sparkling holiday lights with pine trees in the winter. The neon sign and golden pig are iconic remnants of an age that feels nostalgic no matter when you were born.

When they arrive with near empty cups, they enter the stream of Seattleites. The open-air fish market dominates his senses, damp and humid salt water air that smells like salmon. Wille guides Simon by the waist through the crowd and he can’t help the goosebumps that emerge at the sweet gesture and touch.

Wille guides Simon into Sosio’s Market for some fresh produce. Simon hasn’t noticed this particular vendor before, but the citrus looks heavenly. He lingers by the clementines, which Wille promptly adds to a basket an eccentric, heavy set biker butch gave them upon entry.  Wille quickly adds several to the basket, smiling at Simon as he does,

“I know you love them.”

“What, how do you know that?”

Simon coyly asks

“Well, you usually bring them at lunch and you shared one with me the first day we met.”

While Wille is correct that Simon enjoys clementines, they might be his new favorite fruit with the way Wille is staring at him adoringly, remembering the day they met with such fondness.

Wille winks at Simon’s puppy dog stare and continues around the jam-packed booth, shimmying between people and produce stands with ease as he searches for ingredients Simon is completely oblivious to. Wille becomes quick friends with the biker butch who’s goes by Jo, taking her suggestions with enthusiasm, loading their basket to the brim until he reminds Jo that they have to walk home. Simon loves watching Wille in this element, observing him interact with the rest of the world. While he values how vulnerable Wille is when they are alone, it is a point of pride to watch his lover bring others so much joy with his enthusiasm for life.

They leave with a bag full of produce they have no plan for, hearts achingly full,

“I might have gotten a little carried away.”

Wille whispers between them as they part the steady stream of people to rejoin the slow march through the market.

“A little?”

Simon can’t hide his smirk, chuckling as he says it.

“God, Simon, she was so interesting too. She met her partner in a motorcycle group that rides in pride together each year. They’ve been together for like, ever, 15 or 20 years or something.”

Simon can’t help himself,

“You’re cute, Wille.”

He pauses a moment before continuing his train of thought,

“Have you always been so social? An extrovert?”

Wille gives him a smile that says more than any answer will, but Simon listens intently nonetheless,

“No, I used to be very timid. I was kind of forced to be more extroverted as I got older when the whole ‘being shy’ dynamic wasn’t cute anymore. My parents expected me to act a certain way but when I would try to be more social, I’d always say or do the wrong thing. I just didn’t fit in. I’ve sort of realized that I was never ‘shy’, I just didn’t have a safe space to be myself without fear of reprimand or judgement.

I’ve always loved meeting new people, learning about different cultures and experiences. I am an inherently curious person.”

Wille’s eyes shimmer with a glint of mischief before reconfiguring into a polite smile,

“My family dynamic made me feel extremely self-conscious, but I’ve worked through that trauma, you know?

I mean, the work is never done, right? But I was talking with Boris, my therapist, one time and he asked me why I cared about the opinions of people who share totally different values than me…and that really hit home. I realized I was wasting so much time seeking the approval of people whose opinions I don’t value.

So, I try to exist in a way that feels authentic. I don’t put so much pressure on myself to ‘perform’ for others anymore. People will like me, or they won’t but either way, I’m comfortable with who I am. I put myself out there because I’ve found that the risk of looking foolish is worth the reward more times than not.”

Simon’s mind is processing the words as they flow, focused on their discussion amidst the busyness surrounding them. He imagines little Wille, a sensitive and curious kid who didn’t quite fit the mold of ultra-macho masculinity that so often dominates such toxic environments. The saying goes; ‘you become who you needed as a child’ and that couldn’t be truer for Wille.

“I am really sorry you were made to feel so ‘other’. That sucks. I’m really proud of you for not letting it control you, though. That takes a lot of courage. And I quite like who you are now. I love it, in fact.”

Simon smiles at the last part, making eyes at Wille, wrapping a free arm around his slender waist before kissing him on the cheek.

“I don’t know if I’ve told you this, but I was bullied as a kid.”

This caught Wille’s attention, a perplexed expression painting his face as if he can’t fathom it.

Simon smiles, nodding to confirm,

“Yeah. A poor, gay latino kid in Sweden, imagine that?

I mean, I have pretty thick skin. And generally speaking, the bullying was way worse for Sara because of her diagnosis but yeah. We were called every racist, homophonic slur you could imagine but that’s never what got to me. What bothered me most was when they would make fun of how poor our family was. I don’t know why that was the straw that broke the camel’s back, but it lit a fire under me. I watched my mom work tirelessly for 12–16-hour shifts and some punk ass pre-teens named Johan has the audacity to make fun of me for being poor? Wille, I saw red whenever that happened. And mind you, I didn’t give a shit that our family was poor. Like, we made do with what we had. We wore hand me downs. Yada yada yada. It bothered me that these privileged snot nosed kids were making fun of my hard-working mama for something entirely out of her control. Nurses are paid shit Wille! We rely on them to keep us healthy and safe and yet they are paid breadcrumbs working weekends and holidays. Thankless.”

“Fuck, Simme that’s horrible. That’s so fucked up. I am sorry you had to deal with that on top of everything else. That must have been really hard.”

“You know, it sucked. But it also made me into who I am today…”

Wille interjects, finishing his sentence,

“Strong, kind, generous, empathetic, brave….”

Simon can’t help his blush, chuckling at the string of sweet words Wille is using to describe him.

“…I was going to say scrappy.”

They both break into a fit of giggles, Simon leaning into Wille’s shoulder as they balance their bags of groceries in the crowded hallway.

Wille nods towards one of the side door exits and they enjoy the cool ocean air as they wait for “the best bao buns Wille has ever had” at an unassuming vendor in post alley. They add the plastic take out container to their growing stack and Simon can’t help but smile.

“You know, this date has been so amazing, I almost forgot that you’re brand new to Seattle. This has been so fun. Best. Date. Ever. Hands down.”

Wille smiles wide with all of his crooked teeth on full display at the compliment.

“Well, the bar was really high. When you asked me out the first time and we went to that bar, I was like ‘woah this guy is so fucking cool’. I was so impressed Simon. The pressure was on, in the best way so I knew I had to show out.”

Wille nudges him, winking in the most flirtatious and endearing way. They decide to take their loot back to Wille’s place for a relaxing afternoon, catching a bus so they don’t have to carry their haul up back up the hill. The conversation is engaging and the silence, just as comfortable.

Once they arrive back to Wille’s apartment, they unload their assortment and dig into the bao buns.

“Holy shit, you were right.”

Wille nods, with a smirk that says, ‘I told you so’,

“Fuck”

They eat, exchanging affirming noises, not unlike those exchanged this morning in the quiet of Wille’s bedroom. Simon feels totally relaxed. Although he isn’t a particularly anxious person, he seldom feels totally at ease with someone so quickly.

“Can I play that Tyler, the Creator album I told you about? I’d love to experience it with you, especially since you haven’t heard it all before.”

Simon nods eagerly,

“That sounds perfect!”


Wille gathers blankets and the two get comfy on the couch as the cords of the first song plays. The drums combined with the call and response chanting is so unique; a nod to African culture, of course, but perhaps more subtly, highlighting trap beats and our collective perception of the ‘newer’ phenomenon. Simon listens intently as the songs blend together. This really is how music is intended to be listened to. Each story blends into the next with an ease that feels both poetic and refreshingly honest.

‘Hey Jane’ comes on and Simon recognizes it as the song Wille was listening to when he interrupted him after school earlier this week.

“I remember you saying that this was your favorite?”

Simon asks, body heavy and heart light as he listens to the story play out.

Wille hums affirmatively and Simon can hear the gears turning in his mind. Curious about what has Wille so contemplative, Simon continues,

“Why is it your favorite?”

The silence begins to feel loud in the quiet apartment until Wille replies with a low chuckle and sad smile,

“I guess, it resonates. It’s…. relatable.”

Simon isn’t following, confused how a song about a pregnancy scare or abortion could be…

Fuck.

Wille is watching him intently, amber eyes warm as he takes in Simon’s reaction at the realization.

“I was eighteen years old. This girl and I, well, we started seeing each other fall of our first year at university. It was pretty casual for the most part. We never met each other’s family or anything. But she was lovely, for all intents and purposes. Any way’s, when we came back after Christmas break she told me that she was pregnant. She missed her period during the holiday and took a test on a whim. Sure enough, two pink lines. Anyways, she felt super conflicted about everything because of course she wanted to be a mom at some point but not at eighteen and not after only a few months of dating. It is weird to try and summarize everything because the whole conversation only lasted a week or two but it felt like lifetimes. It aged us. When she decided to get the abortion, I went with her. It was the least I could do, you know? We were both an emotional mess and so fucking young Simon. I hadn’t even been having sex a year…”

Wille trails off, shaking his head as if to clear any remaining thoughts about the subject. Simon takes this opportunity to unfurl himself from his blanket cocoon and cross the couch to sit on Wille’s lap. Simon wraps him into the biggest hug he can manage with the weird angle, holding him tight against his chest while he draws soothing patterns onto his back.

“Thank you for trusting me, Wille. I’m here for you.”

Simon doesn’t overcomplicate it with unsolicited reassurance that could suggest he did anything wrong, which he didn’t. He simply holds him while Wille hums along to the beat as it fades into the next song.

“Thank you, Simme. I’m okay, I promise. I just wanted to share… And thank you for not apologizing.”

Simon interrupts him,

“There is nothing to apologize for. You did nothing wrong.”

The words are matter of fact, but the tone Simon uses is intentionally tender; reassuring but gentle.

“I really appreciate you sharing, mi amour.”

Simon remains half on Wille’s lap, snuggling into his embrace as the album continues, tension broken by the safe space they’ve created in one another’s embrace. 

They shift in one another’s arms but remain intertwined while the album concludes. Simon is listening to the closing notes in time with Wille’s heartbeat when he feels a sweet kiss on his crown of curls.

“Truth or dare?”

Simon feels Wille’s cheek curl into a smirk at the abrupt question.

“Dare.”

He responds with practiced confidence although his eyes sparkle with mirth as he reciprocates Simon’s intent gaze.

“I dare you to read me the prose you wrote when you were staring at me this morning.”

Wille feigns offense, gasping dramatically as if the suggestion was completely wrong but giggles when Simon raises an eyebrow,

“You caught me…Yeah, I’ll share it with you Simme. It’s rough around the edges still though.”

Simon hums while Wille retrieves his notebook from the bedside table. He clears his throat before beginning,

“You are honey; golden syrup that makes everything sweet, mimicking the suns persistent rays through my cheap idea curtains. You lay attached to my boney hip, your body, soft and sticky from a night of making love, as if you couldn’t tolerate a second apart. I revel in the closeness, the way your breath tickles my barely there chest hair and your hand grips my waist like I’m something worth holding close. I ache with a type of longing I didn’t know existed, a desire that challenges my perceptions and reinforces the fact that: I have a sweet tooth, if only for you.

So yeah…that’s it.”

Chapter Text

Wille lays with a blanket of Simon wrapped around him like a koala bear. The sunlight is fighting through the clouds, and it makes Simon look angelic, laying across his bed like a piece of art. He risks repositioning, grabbing his pocket-sized notebook from his bedside table and rests it on his thigh while he finds a pen amidst all the clutter. He ignores the open lube container and cellphones with dead batteries.

Fortunately, Simon continues in his slumber, breathing softly in the quiet of the room as Wille attempts to describe the beautiful scene in front of him in ink.

Honey

Warmth

Sweet

The words flow, inspiration easy to tap into when he is so in love with the man laying across him. Wille is aware how crazy he probably sounds, proclaiming love after knowing someone for such little time but as the infamous and equally cringe worthy saying goes; ‘when you know, you know’. Wille knows. It has never felt like this with anyone else ever, even when he thought he was in love before.

He wants to tell Simon but doesn’t want to overwhelm him with such intense emotions and proclamations. His train of thought is interrupted by the stirring of his lover, stretching across the small bed frame, groaning before pulling Wille in ever tighter.

“Good morning, sleepy head”

Simon’s sleepy smile is beautiful, but his adorable chuckle is what makes Wille smile wide.

“Good morning to you too… but it seems like you’ve been up for a while.”

Simon’s hand canvas his skin in a way that makes his toes curl and skin tingle. His hand reaches his waist and Wille is aware of his quickly hardening length as Simon nuzzles closer, his own length twitching against his thigh.

Simon kisses Wille’s exposed chest, tracing his nose along his defined pecs and hard nipples.  Wille can’t help the way his breath catches, pace quickening against Simon’s loose, messy curls. Always a menace, Simon places slightly more pressure on Wille’s dick, tracing the shaft with his musician’s hands.

“Have you been thinking about me this morning, Wille?”

Wille wasn’t expecting this, but he takes every intimate touch in stride, reveling in Simon’s hand on him, insatiable for Simon. Words evade him and instead Wille responds with a needy whine, nodding.

“What were you doing?”

Simon further probes, taking his hand off Wille’s quickly growing erection, and placing it on his neck. Simon allows the gentlest of pressure, rubbing his jaw line and pulse point while he awaits Wille’s response.

Although he was writing sweet love notes, Wille indulges in the fantasies that are never far from his mind, eager to act out every one of them, over time. He closes his notebook, placing it on the bedside table as he meet’s Simon’s seductive gaze.

“I was thinking about…”

Wille can hardly maintain his composure which is embarrassing given how little they are doing right now. He speaks from the heart, eager to demonstrate his adoration and desire simultaneously.

“…everything. I want to try everything with you.”

His earnest and desperation must be obvious because Simon rewards him with a gentle tug on ear and squeeze around his waist. Wille decides ‘fuck it’, resigned to indulging his fantasies, sharing each dirty little secret with him in the quiet of the morning,

“I want you to fuck me in the morning, plug me up with your cum so you can have your way with me later that day. I want to eat you out, feel your tender rim on my tongue and taste my own cum oozing out from fucking you the night before. I want to make out with you like teenagers, cumming just from rutting against one another. I want you make me yours, any way you’d like, using my body as an instrument for your pleasure. I want you in every way, shape, and form.”

Simon’s eyes dilate, irises disappearing with lust pooling as the words register.

“Fuck, Wille, I love that dirty mouth of yours.”

Simon moves his fingers from Wille’s clavicle to his desperate lips, swiping his thumb against the lower half. Wille opens his mouth, desire leaving him slack jawed and eager for Simon to use him; his mouth, his thigh, his dick, his hole, his everything. Simon advances his thumb into Wille’s mouth and Wille gets to work kissing it with filthy intention,

“I am going to sit on your face. I want to feel that pretty tongue fuck me the way you did last night. And then? If you’re a good boy, I’ll fill you up, fuck you into the mattress so when we walk to get coffee, all you’ll be able to think about is how I fucked your tight ass.”

Wille moans around Simon’s finger, nodding vigorously before verbalizing what Simon already knows,

“Want that, want you.”

Simon takes control, and Wille is grateful for the shared understanding, mutual respect, and sexy dance they always find; taking turns pleasing one another in a way that is exactly what they need in that moment.

Simon straddles Wille’s knees, looking back at the man with a devilish grin until Wille makes grabby hands for Simon to sit on his face.

“Come here, baby. I’m ready. I want to taste you.”

Simon is a fucking vision, body contorting easily, hovering above him. Simon’s back is arched just so, the curve of his spine highlighting his back dimples that punctuate with the most gorgeous ass; thick and muscular with faded silver stretch marks on his hips. His taint is sticky, messy from Wille’s cum and swollen from the way it stretched so deliciously around Wille’s cock last night. Wille can’t help himself,

“God, your fucking gorgeous, Simon.”

Wille doesn’t waste any time, kissing Simon’s tender rim with sloppy reverence, advancing his tongue with persistence that makes Simon gasp and whine into the small bedroom.

Wille supports Simon’s small frame, his lover’s orgasm quickly approaching with each flick of his tongue and squeeze of his hips. Wille feels Simon’s leaking cock on his chest, and he chases Simon’s pleasure as if it was his own. Simon interrupts his determined strokes,

“Fuck, Wille I need you.”

As soon as the words register, Simon is already turning around, lifting his ass into the air before pivoting to one side so he can be face to face with Wille. Simon doesn’t hesitate, drawing Wille into a slow but deep kiss that is salty and musky… cum and sweat and saliva and morning breath that is quickly forgotten. The gesture, so intimate that Wille could cum untouched if he allowed such thoughts to consume him.

“Still want me to fuck you?”

Wille is confused by the question, desperate to have Simon in any way he can. He meant every word of his earlier profession; Wille is an instrument in Simon’s pleasure. Simon reads between the lines, Wille’s furrowed eyebrows highlighting his confusion.

Simon further clarifies,

“I just want to make sure this is something you want Wille. I can get a little carried away with my dirty talk and never want you to feel pressured to do anything.”

Relief pools, confusion shifting to genuine appreciation with just a hint of amusement. God, he wants that so bad.

“Oh yes, Simon. I want this. I want you to fuck me, like so bad.”

Wille giggles with giddy anticipation.

“….but I appreciate you checking in. That’s hot.”

Simon pulls him in for another gentle, reverent kiss before directing Wille,

“On your belly babe, I want you lay down and spread your knees wide for me so I can open you up before I fuck you.”

Wille is quick to assume the described position, shifting his body in front of Simon. Wille loves the trust that this position requires; it’s a kind of vulnerability that feels sacred and rare.

Wille feels Simon’s hands rubbing soft circles on his back and ass before retrieving lube from the nightstand. The pop of the cap sends chills down Wille’s spine in anticipation. Simon’s slick wet fingers trace his hole, puckering at the anticipated intrusion but desperate for more. Not being able to see Simon from this angle makes it all the more exciting, his other senses in overdrive, processing each touch like it’s his first.

Luckily, Simon doesn’t make him wait long, entering him with one wet finger, and Wille can’t help the moan that escapes. His small rocking movements turn into full on writhing as he begs Simon for more. They continue this back-and-forth prep dance until Simon can fit three fingers comfortably and Wille can’t wait any longer.

Wille feels Simon’s hard cock between his cheeks, teasing his wet taint before he finally indulges him, entering with care and confidence in one slow thrust.

Wille nearly forgets to breathe, basking in fullness of Simon’s cock and the pressure of the man hovering above him. Despite their prep, the stretch is noticeable in a way that makes his cock twitch beneath him. Wille can’t help but wiggle, shifting his hips to relieve some of the pressure building.

Simon’s voice is low, husky with lust,

“Fuck, Wille you feel so amazing.”

“You are such a good boy, taking me so well.”

“You make me feel whole, baby. It’s just you, it will always be you, Wille.”

The confessions pouring out of Simon fill Wille in a way he didn’t know he needed. The mixture of filth and praise and love feels unlike anything he’s ever experienced. It’s so uniquely Simon and Wille couldn’t agree more;

It will always be you, Simon. It will always be you.

Simon wants him without his carefully curated silk screen; anxious and pining and giddy and romantic and whiny and curious and everything in between. The two exchange power in a way that makes Wille feel so safe and seen.

Simon holds him close and all Wille can think is,

This is what they mean when they say making love. This is it.

Wille can’t help the moans pouring out of him, the overwhelming pleasure of the physical combined with their emotional vulnerability, pushing him over the edge to cum into the mattress as Simon spills his seed deep inside Wille.

Wille isn’t sure if it is the rush of post-orgasmic oxytocin or Simon’s strong arms holding him flush as they remain connected but the words that have been on the back of his mind all day spill between them in a quiet whisper,

“I love you, Simon.”

Wille feels Simon shift, pulling his softening cock out and Wille feels empty. He wishes they could stay connected forever in the safety on these four walls. His thoughts are racing;

Was it too soon?

Was it too much?

Does Simon feel the same way?

Simon interrupts his spiraling thoughts with his gentle, melodic voice,

“Wille, baby, will you turn around for me?”

Wille does so begrudgingly, as if another moment or two could postpone the inevitable embarrassment of just professing his love.

Simon straddles him, searching his gaze with devotion and emotion, placing a hand on his cheek and holding him like he is invaluable. Simon brings their foreheads together, balancing on one another as they share breath.

Simon breaks the silence,

“Say it again.”

Holding Wille’s head steady between his hands, Simon separates them, staring deeply into his eyes, waiting.

“I love you, Simon.”

The intensity of the moment dissolves into complete, unfiltered joy as Simon smiles wide at his declaration. His eyes are their usual dark pools, framed perfectly by his smile lines and sweaty curls. He looks angelic and Wille forgets all self-conscious because how could he not say I love you to the man sitting in front of him.

The mirth in Simon’s eyes is gentle as he processes Wille’s confession with glee, responding with such sincerity,

“I love you too, Wille”

The moment feels poetic, and he tries to remember a time he’s every felt so happy, failing miserably. Wille pulls Simon in by the waist, letting happy tears mix with salt from their sweat, embracing in a hug that feels like a promise.

***

Their morning continues in domestic bliss, showering lazily and exchanging sweet touches; a brush of the fingers and squeeze of the shoulders. Wille lingers in Simon’s orbit and the two enjoy the dance as they get ready for the rest of their morning.

As Wille does his skincare with a towel hung lazily over his hips while Simon rinses his hair, he can’t help but chuckle quietly, thinking about the events of the morning. They exchanged ‘I love yous’ after no time at all like a couple of lesbians.

‘Gayyyyyyy’ Wille jokes to himself.

Wille realizes Simon can probably hear him when wet curls pop out from behind the curtain to ask,

“What are you laughing at, babe?”

“You’d think we’re lesbians the way we’re saying, ‘I love you’ on our second official date.”

Wille is wearing a shit eating grin, barely able to get the words out before Simon joins him in a boisterous laugh that leaves both men sore from smiling so much.

Wille keeps him company as he finishes up in the shower, handing him a plush towel to dry off with upon exiting.

Getting ready together feels domestic. Simon lays out clothes from his overnight bag before asking,

“Will you help me pick out what to wear?”

Wille can’t help his amused grin, eyeing his handsome, stylish lover as he lays out the options. Simon interjects before Wille can tease him,

“Before you say anything, you were the one who insisted this two-part date be a surprise, remember? What’s a girl to do?”

“Touché, Simon. You have a point there.”

Wille walks up behind Simon, allowing his still damp bare chest to touch Simon’s back while he snuggles into the crook of Simon’s neck. Simon pulls Wille’s arms tight around his torso, nuzzling, pulling him ever closer. Wille starts,

“Well first, we are going to get coffee for our walk down to pike place market. And then we’d take our time exploring all of the little booths and shops there. I know it’s stupid busy on Saturdays but I also kind of love that busyness. And once we’re ready to eat I have a couple ideas depending on what kind of food you’re craving. I also thought we could grab some ingredients to bring back to the apartment for later?”

Simon hums along to Wille’s far too elaborate date plans, indulging him with such graciousness,

“That sounds amazing, Wille. I can’t believe you planned all of this for me.”

Wille places a chaste kiss on Simon’s still damp curls before squeezing him once more,

“You’re worth it.”

Wille watches as emotions well in Simon’s eyes, dissipating just as quickly as they appear; presumably embracing the compliment with a quiet gratitude that leads Wille to believe it means more than he knows.

While wordy proclamations and poems feel like an all too comfortable prose for him, Wille recognizes that sometimes quiet statements whispered in the quiet of the moment make the biggest impact.

Wille retrieves his favorite tan carhartt pants with a simple black quarter zip, pairing the outfit with his high-top white converse and a series of rings and accessories to liven up the basic fit.

Simon dresses in like, wearing baggy jeans with a long sleeve shirt and jumper. He relies on his tried and true new balances that look perfectly worn in and religiously used with an old Patagonia beanie in an effort to stay warm. Simon looks unfairly attractive in his simple outfit, radiating warmth and confidence.

The two step into the sleepy Seattle morning hand in hand, matching rain jackets and all. 

“So, what were you writing this morning? Is that a part of your everyday routine or just sometimes?”

Simon is idly stroking the back of Wille’s hand with his thumb, awaiting his answer as they walk,

“Well, this morning I was just writing a little prose. I’m always writing little lines I think of when I’m feeling inspired. I usually just run with them and piece meal them together.”

Wille exposes a little piece of himself, sharing his writing routine, aware of how silly it sounds out loud. People often think of writers sitting still at a desk, focusing their energy on a piece. And while sometimes Wille finds himself in this situation, more often than not, inspiration comes to him randomly without a prescribed timeline. Simon continues,

“Do you think I could read something of yours sometime? I’m not well versed in poetry, but I’d really like to read anything you’d be willing to share.”

“I’d like that. Actually…”

Wille pauses, unsure if it is ‘too much’ to share that this morning he was writing a little love poem for Simon. He contemplates it for a moment before pulling the trigger, laying himself bare in front of Simon,

“I wrote a little something about you. A poem. It’s not fancy or anything but maybe I could share that one with you?”

Simon looks sincerely surprised, processing Wille’s confession with what appears to be genuine flattery,

“Are you serious, Wille? Of course I want to hear it. That is….so fucking nice.”

Simon tugs on Wille’s arm, pulling him close to kiss him on the cheek. Wille doesn’t expect such an abrupt display of affection but the gesture tugs on his heart strings, warmth pooling at his core as Simon continues,

“I’m holding you to it, you know?”

Simon stops in his tracks, keeping the bit going, pointing in the direction that they came from,

“Should we go back now? So, I don’t have to wait?”

Wille can’t help but laugh, booming and guttural at the physical comedy of Simon, teasing him in the best way possible. Simon is funny. Like, genuinely hilarious. He has this quick-witted sense of humor that never fails to bring Wille to tears, cheeks straining after smiling all day.

Wille jumps at an excuse to reach out to Simon, pulling him towards downtown as the resume their walk towards coffee. Once the laughter subsides, they continue their comfortable conversation about their weeks, layers peeling back with the safe space they create for one another.

When they arrive at the coffee shop and Simon tries to pay, Wille interjects, reciting one of their inside jokes,

“Let your boyfriend pay, honey.”

Wille winks at Simon who is tucking his wallet away, shamelessly flirting with his handsome boyfriend.

The barista calls out their order and the two retrieve their drinks, holding their hot beverages close as they continue their route to the market. The misty Seattle fog is burning off as they near the waterfront, one block at a time.

Wille notices the buzz of downtown steadily increasing both in volume and congestion. Each parking lot they pass is more expensive than the last, filled to the brim with out of state plates and rental cars carrying eager tourists to the iconic market. Locals are more often than not on foot, toting their reusable grocery bags with pride as they find their favorite markets nestled in the various floors of the gargantuan building. Wille has gotten lost in its many floors more times than he’d care to admit.

Soon enough, they are tossing their now empty coffee cups and entering the steam of people eager to explore the booths on the main floor. Wille takes a deep breath in, appreciating the humid dampness of cold stone and an open fish market. He smiles at the gentleman singing, slinging fish with practiced ease, putting on a show for the congregating tourists.  Wille guides Simon by the waist through the crowd into Sosio’s Market for some fresh produce. Wille raises his eyes in question and Simon responds by shaking his head, confirming that he was not familiar with this particular vendor. Simon is hardly subtle, lingering around the citrus, taking in the heavenly aroma until Wille promptly adds several clementines to the basket an eccentric, heavy set biker butch gave them upon entry.  Wille quickly adds, 

“I know you love them.”

“What, how do you know that?”

Simon coyly asks

“Well, you usually bring them at lunch, and you shared one with me the first day we met.”

Wille feels bold, winking once again as Simon stares at him with the most endearing puppy dog eyes. They both continue around the jam-packed booth, shimmying between people and produce stands with ease as Wille reads the adorable handwritten signs for each variety of fruit and veggie, surmising which is in season and taking every suggestion the biker butch, who goes by Jo, gives them. Wille doesn’t realize how quickly each sidebar conversation about a particular ingredient becomes another kilogram in their tote bag to lug home, politely stopping Jo from any more amazing suggestions until they come back next week.

After they check out and re-enter the crowd, Wille quietly admits,

“I might have gotten a little carried away.”

Simon quickly retorts,

“A little?”

Giving him the cutest smirk as he chuckles.

“God, Simon, she was so interesting too. She met her partner in a motorcycle group that rides in pride together each year. They’ve been together for like, ever, 15 or 20 years or something.”

“You’re cute, Wille.”

Simon pauses a moment before continuing,

“Have you always been so social? An extrovert?”

Wille gives him a smile, reflecting in a proud but melancholic way,

“No, I used to be very timid. I was kind of forced to be more extroverted as I got older when the whole ‘being shy’ dynamic wasn’t cute anymore. My parents expected me to act a certain way but when I would try to be more social, I’d always say or do the wrong thing. I just didn’t fit in. I’ve sort of realized that I was never ‘shy’, I just didn’t have a safe space to be myself without fear of reprimand or judgement.

I’ve always loved meeting new people, learning about different cultures and experiences. I am an inherently curious person.”

Wille’s eyes shimmer with a glint of mischief before reconfiguring into a polite smile,

“My family dynamic made me feel extremely self-conscious, but I’ve worked through that trauma, you know?

I mean, the work is never done, right? But I was talking with Boris, my therapist, one time and he asked me why I cared about the opinions of people who share totally different values than me…and that really hit home. I realized I was wasting so much time seeking the approval of people whose opinions I don’t value.

So, I try to exist in a way that feels authentic. I don’t put so much pressure on myself to ‘perform’ for others anymore. People will like me, or they won’t but either way, I’m comfortable with who I am. I put myself out there because I’ve found that the risk of looking foolish is worth the reward more times than not.”

Simon is nodding intently, listening with focus despite their busy surroundings, not jumping to respond but allowing the vulnerable moment to sit between them.

“I am really sorry you were made to feel so ‘other’. That sucks. I’m really proud of you for not letting it control you, though. That takes a lot of courage. And I quite like who you are now. I love it, in fact.”

Simon smiles at the last part, making eyes at Wille, wrapping a free arm around his slender waist before kissing him on the cheek. Wille’s heart does summersaults at the way Simon always knows exactly what to say. Simon clears his throat, pausing before continuing the conversation,

“I don’t know if I’ve told you this, but I was bullied as a kid.”

All the warmth that Simon makes him feel suddenly spiraled into white hot anger coupled with complete confusion. How could anyone bully Simon?

Realization hits as Simon quips,

“Yeah. A poor, gay latino kid in Sweden, imagine that?”

Although Simon chuckles, there is nothing humorous about what he is saying. Wille is connecting the dots of how fucking unfair is is that people can be so cruel to someone as amazing as Simon for simply existing. Elitist, racist, homophobic pricks.

Simon interrupts his spiraling thoughts,

“I mean, I have pretty thick skin. And generally speaking, the bullying was way worse for Sara because of her diagnosis but yeah. We were called every racist, homophonic slur you could imagine but that’s never what got to me. What bothered me most was when they would make fun of how poor our family was. I don’t know why that was the straw that broke the camel’s back, but it lit a fire under me. I watched my mom work tirelessly for 12–16-hour shifts and some punk ass pre-teens named Johan has the audacity to make fun of me for being poor? Wille, I saw red whenever that happened. And mind you, I didn’t give a shit that our family was poor. Like, we made do with what we had. We wore hand me downs. Yada yada yada. It bothered me that these privileged snot nosed kids were making fun of my hard-working mama for something entirely out of her control. Nurses are paid shit Wille! We rely on them to keep us healthy and safe and yet they are paid breadcrumbs working weekends and holidays. Thankless.”

“Fuck, Simme that’s horrible. That’s so fucked up. I am sorry you had to deal with that on top of everything else. That must have been really hard.”

“You know, it sucked. But it also made me into who I am today…”

Wille interjects, finishing his sentence,

“Strong, kind, generous, empathetic, brave….”

Simon can’t help his blush, chuckling before clarifying,

“…I was going to say scrappy.”

They both break into a fit of giggles, Simon leaning into Wille’s shoulder as they balance their bags of groceries in the crowded hallway.

Wille nods towards one of the side door exits and brings them to one of his favorite stands that has the most delicious pork bao buns. Simon seems skeptical but Wille reassures him with determination. They add the plastic take out container to their growing stack and Simon can’t help but smile.

“You know, this date has been so amazing, I almost forgot that you’re brand new to Seattle. This has been so fun. Best. Date. Ever. Hands down.”

Wille smiles wide with all of his crooked teeth on full display at the compliment.

“Well, the bar was really high. When you asked me out the first time and we went to that bar, I was like ‘woah this guy is so fucking cool’. I was so impressed Simon. The pressure was on, in the best way, so I knew I had to show out.”

They decide to take their loot back to Wille’s place for a relaxing afternoon, catching a bus so they don’t have to carry their haul up back up the hill. The conversation is engaging and the silence, just as comfortable.

Once they arrive back to Wille’s apartment, they unload their assortment and dig into the bao buns.

“Holy shit, you were right.”

Wille nods, with a smirk that says, ‘I told you so’,

“Fuck”

They eat, exchanging affirming noises, not unlike those exchanged this morning in the quiet of Wille’s bedroom. Wille’s heart and stomach are full as he considers his next course of action,

“Can I play that Tyler, the Creator album I told you about? I’d love to experience it with you, especially since you haven’t heard it all before.”

Simon nods eagerly,

“That sounds perfect!”


Wille gathers blankets and the two get comfy on the couch as the cords of the first song plays. Wille knows each intro, melody, and outro by heart, the entire album appearing on his ‘on repeat’ playlist on Spotify. Wille loves the way each story blends together in a way that is cohesive and captivating. It really drives home the multifaceted complexity of one human in a way that is both engaging and relatable.

‘Hey Jane’ comes on and Simon recognizes it as the song Wille was listening to when he interrupted him after school earlier this week,

“I remember you saying that this was your favorite?”

Wille hums affirmatively and Simon continues,

“Why is it your favorite?”

The silence begins to feel loud in the quiet apartment until Wille replies with a low chuckle and sad smile,

“I guess, it resonates. It’s…. relatable.”

Wille waits, watching as Simon processes the weight of such a confession, eyes widening as realization finally hits him.

“I was eighteen years old. This girl and I, well, we started seeing each other fall of our first year at university. It was pretty casual for the most part. We never met each other’s family or anything. But she was lovely, for all intents and purposes. Any way’s, when we came back after Christmas break she told me that she was pregnant. She missed her period during the holiday and took a test on a whim. Sure enough, two pink lines. Anyways, she felt super conflicted about everything because of course she wanted to be a mom at some point but not at eighteen and not after only a few months of dating. It is weird to try and summarize everything because the whole conversation only lasted a week or two but it felt like lifetimes. It aged us. When she decided to get the abortion, I went with her. It was the least I could do, you know? We were both an emotional mess and so fucking young Simon. I hadn’t even been having sex a year…”

Wille trails off, shaking the memory free as he nervously awaits Simon’s response.

Simon doesn’t skip beat, unfurling himself from his blanket cocoon and crossing the cushions between them to sit in Wille’s lap before wrapping him into the tightest embrace.

“Thank you for trusting me, Wille. I’m here for you.”

The sincere, simple words heal Wille in a way no therapist has ever been able to, providing reassurance in a way that makes Wille feel so seen and safe.

“Thank you, Simme. I’m okay, I promise. I just wanted to share… And thank you for not apologizing.”

Simon interrupts him,

“There is nothing to apologize for. You did nothing wrong.”

The words are matter of fact, but the tone Simon uses is intentionally tender; reassuring but gentle.

“I really appreciate you sharing, mi amour.”

Simon remains half on Wille’s lap and Wille relishes the proximity, snuggling into his embrace as the album plays on. They shift in one another’s arms but remain intertwined until the final notes of the song signal its conclusion. Wille kisses the top of Simon’s gorgeous curls as Simon interrupts the silence with a question,

“Truth or dare?”

Wille can’t help but smile as he responds confidently, 

“Dare.”

Simon brings his eyes to meet Wille’s gaze before challenging,

“I dare you to read me the prose you wrote when you were staring at me this morning.”

Wille brings out his theatre kid theatrics, gasping dramatically before falling into a fit of giggles,

“You caught me…Yeah, I’ll share it with you Simme. It’s rough around the edges still though.”

Simon hums while Wille retrieves his notebook from the bedside table. He clears his throat before beginning, only slightly nervous but determined to portray the kind of confidence that Simon makes him feel. Channeling every ounce of bravery Wille starts,

“You are honey; golden syrup that makes everything sweet, mimicking the suns persistent rays through my cheap ikea curtains. You lay attached to my boney hip, your body, soft and sticky from a night of making love, as if you couldn’t tolerate a second apart. I revel in the closeness, the way your breath tickles my barely there chest hair and your hand grips my waist like I’m something worth holding close. I ache with a type of longing I didn’t know existed, a desire that challenges my perceptions and reinforces the fact that: I have a sweet tooth, if only for you.

So yeah…that’s it.”

Chapter Text

“You are honey; golden syrup that makes everything sweet, mimicking the suns persistent rays through my cheap ikea curtains. You lay attached to my boney hip, your body, soft and sticky from a night of making love, as if you couldn’t tolerate a second apart. I revel in the closeness, the way your breath tickles my barely there chest hair and your hand grips my waist like I’m something worth holding close. I ache with a type of longing I didn’t know existed, a desire that challenges my perceptions and reinforces the fact that: I have a sweet tooth, if only for you.

So yeah…that’s it.”

The words wash over Simon like a wave in the ocean. He feels like he might as well be underwater, Wille’s soft voice, the only sound that reaches his consciousness as he sits slack jawed and love struck by words that feel entirely too sweet.

Simon thinks of the musical ballads he studied in university, the way lovers pine for one another with a need bordering on desperation. He remembers all of the times he sat with heartache, yearning for the kind of love that always felt just out of reach; the kind of love that is now standing in front of him with earnest eyes and beautiful prose.

Wille returns his gaze expectantly, awaiting an answer that is stuck in his throat, bubbling with emotion.

“Wille, amor”

Simon bridges the remaining space between them, drawing him into a kiss that says everything without any words. Wille’s lips part easily, encouraging Simon’s passion in a way that is equally romantic and loving.

Simon pours every ounce of adoration into the kiss, holding Wille by the neck and jaw, stroking his prominent cheek bones like the Crown Jewels they are. He has never felt so treasured as he does when he is with Wille.

Simon straddles Wille with a familiar ease, holding the man close. He can feel the pages of Wille’s small notebook between them against his chest, uncomfortable but not caring in the slightest. Wille must feel similarly, meeting each gentle, grinding movement with unabashed giddiness.

Wille’s strong hands find purchase on his waist, guiding his movements and pressure so they are both gasping into each other’s mouthes, unable to maintain a proper kiss between low moans and breathless plea’s.

Wille chuckles quietly, pulling Simon out of his cloud of lust. Simon meets his gaze with a curious uptick of his brow, as if to say, ‘what’s so funny?’. Wille answers his unasked question,

“I just...I’ve never…”

Wille shakes his head, frustrated with his inability to form words as elegantly as he can write them. His confession comes out as a question while Simon waits patiently with nothing but adorning patience,

“Has it ever felt like this for you?”

Wille doesn’t let him finish,

“Like I want to jump your bones like a horny teenager… like seriously, I don’t know if I will ever get over getting to have you like this…”

Willes hands tickle his ribs as he gestures to Simon on top of him,

“…but it’s so much more than that? Like I can’t wait to tell you about a book I’m reading or some high school drama that played out after class or ignorant shit my mother said or a crazy design I come across on an eclectic Tumblr blog… Like hanging out with you and spending time together has quickly become my favorite past time… and on top of it all, I am insanely attracted to you and having the best sex of my life. Like I didn’t think this was possible, for me to feel so connected to someone.”

Wille’s eyes shift downward at the confession, like he was afraid that Simon would believe the lies that suggested Wille was anything but ‘good enough’. Simons leans forward, lips grazing his ears as his noses nuzzles Wille’s soft hair,

“Can I tell you a secret?”

Simon feels Wille nod, a gentle squeeze on his waist confirming the gesture before Simon continues,

“I didn’t think it was possible either… but every day I spend with you has shown me that love and lust and passion and trust and fun can coexist. I used to think it was too good to be true, but you are proving me wrong.”

Wille wraps his arms completely around Simon’s waist, bringing him flush to his chest as he breathes a sigh of relief into the space next to Simon’s ear.

“Jag älskar dig”

Wille whispers before Simon repeats the sweet Swedish back,

“Jag älskar dig också”

Chapter Text

“You are honey; golden syrup that makes everything sweet, mimicking the suns persistent rays through my cheap ikea curtains. You lay attached to my boney hip, your body, soft and sticky from a night of making love, as if you couldn’t tolerate a second apart. I revel in the closeness, the way your breath tickles my barely there chest hair and your hand grips my waist like I’m something worth holding close. I ache with a type of longing I didn’t know existed, a desire that challenges my perceptions and reinforces the fact that: I have a sweet tooth, if only for you.

So yeah…that’s it.”

His words linger in the air, heavy with the familiar anxiety of sharing so much of himself so freely, but this is Simon, after all. Simon, who has met his vulnerability with nothing but gentle tenderness. Simon, who has reciprocated every feeling with eagerness and sincerity. Simon, who persists despite seeing all of the ways in which Wille is broken.

Wille watches his face, the sheen of his eyes and softness of his smile. Often stoic, Simon’s armor cracks under his persistent gaze, emotion welling in a way that not everyone is lucky enough to see.

“Wille, amor”

Simon bridges the remaining space between them, drawing him into a kiss that says everything without any words. Wille feels Simon’s love with every pull of his lips and flick of his tongue; passion and love carefully intertwined in a moment too precious to name.

Wille reciprocates Simon’s passion with ease, opening his mouth for the man to explore, feeling each stroke of his hands on his face and neck, leaving a trail of fire that can only be quenched with more, more, more.

As if reading his mind, Simon straddles Wille with a familiar ease, holding the man close while they kiss. Wille ignores the crumpling pages between them, drawing Simon in by the waist, meeting each gentle, grinding movement with unabashed giddiness.

Wille continues, strong hands on Simon’s tiny waist, guiding their movements and pressure until they are both gasping into each other’s mouthes, unable to maintain a proper kiss between low moans and breathless plea’s.

Wille can’t help it, chuckling quietly at the realization he has bubbling under the surface. Simon meets his gaze with a curious uptick of his brow, as if to say, ‘what’s so funny?’. Wille answers his unasked question,

“I just...I’ve never…”

Wille shakes his head, frustrated with his inability to form words as elegantly as he can write them. His intended confession comes out as a question instead,

“Has it ever felt like this for you?…Like I want to jump your bones like a horny teenager… like seriously, I don’t know if I will ever get over getting to have you like this…”

Willes hands tickle his ribs as he gestures to Simon on top of him,

“…but it’s so much more than that? Like I can’t wait to tell you about a book I’m reading or some high school drama that played out after class or ignorant shit my mother said or a crazy design I come across on an eclectic Tumblr blog… Like hanging out with you and spending time together has quickly become my favorite past time… and on top of it all, I am insanely attracted to you and having the best sex of my life. Like I didn’t think this was possible, for me to feel so connected to someone.”

Wille realizes the weight of his own confession, eyes avoiding Simon’s, nervous that his own intensity might suddenly become ‘too much’. Simon doesn’t give Wille’s anxious thoughts any time to rest, leaning forward instead to whisper in his ear,

“Can I tell you a secret?”

Wille nods and squeezes Simon’s waist since he is unable to meet his gaze,

“I didn’t think it was possible either… but every day I spend with you has shown me that love and lust and passion and trust and fun can coexist. I used to think it was too good to be true, but you are proving me wrong.”

Wille wraps his arms completely around Simon’s waist, bringing him flush to his chest as he breathes a sigh of relief into the space next to Simon’s ear. His heart is pounding with relief, joy, gratitude, and most of all, love.

“Jag älskar dig”

Wille whispers before Simon repeats the sweet Swedish back,

“Jag älskar dig också”

Chapter Text

The days and weeks pass with a new rhythm, steady and building, a routine that nurtures their budding relationship with a passion that can hardly be mistaken for temporary. Wille brings Simon coffee in the mornings they start apart while Simon packs extra clementines to share with Wille during their shared lunch period. Simon cooks and Wille cleans. More often than not, they are falling asleep in one another’s arms, limbs heavy as orgasm pulls them into a deep, safe slumber.

Simon is learning more about Wille. The family he avoids and the distance that feels more therapeutic than difficult. He watches as Wille excels in the school district, earning a reputation for a highly coveted English teacher among the junior class. It is so refreshing to see someone use their strengths, talents, gifts in such a tangible way. More often than not, one’s occupation is a way to earn a living, provide, in an economy where passion comes second. But for Wille, he found his calling.

It’s hard to imagine the frail, anxious version of Wille; forced to exist in an environment so hostile, criticized for not thriving. He was planted in the wrong soil, withering away by no fault of his own. And now, he’s blooming. Radiant and energetic with a vibrancy that makes Simon’s heart swell with pride.

They write quietly curled up on Wille’s couch with a lofi lyrical R&B album playing in the background. Single lyrics develop into full songs as love heals the lingering keloids left by careless lovers of Simon’s past. Simple prose evolves into stream of consciousness poetry that nurtures a wounded child who never thought a love like this was possible.

Thoughtful hums from Wille, deeply focused on his notebook, distract him from his own thoughts. He watches as his boyfriend writes like he’s running out of time, shoulders tense and eyebrows pulled together in focus. Simon shifts on the couch, toes teasing Wille’s exposed ankles with small circles, following the arch of his calf until the tickling touch is too much, pulling Wille from his meditative state to Simon.

“What do you want for Christmas, my love?”

The questions produces a wide grin on Wille’s face as he considers the options.  Mischief replaces said smile with a twinkle Simon is all too familiar with.

Wille closes his notebook, pen holding its place as it rests on the coffee table where his feet just were.  Maintaining eye contact that makes heat pool low in Simon’s stomach, Wille crawls across the couch playfully before breaking out in song;

🎶 All I want for Christmas 🎶

🎶 isssss youuuuuu 🎶

Wille holds the notes with the dedication of a washed-up theatre kid, rendering Simon a giggling mess as he climbs over him before wrapping him in a bear hug while peppering him with kisses.

Simon grabs Wille’s waist, pulling him closer so their chests are flush, separated only by the well-loved hoodies they threw on to lounge in, after dinner.

Simon teases Wille,

“Simppp”

smiling to himself before tickling Wille’s sides. The response is immediate and dramatic with Wille flailing on top of him, arching away from the touch with a panicked laugh while Simon uses the leverage to wrestle him, flipping Wille on his back so their positions are reversed. Wille lets out the most adorable, surprised yelp which Simon fully intends on teasing him for later, after…

Wille’s giggles slowly subside when he realizes Simon’s blow pupils and flushed cheeks. Simon doesn’t hesitate, leaning in to kiss his throat and neck with unhurried reverence, listening to Wille’s breath as he exhales and hums contentedly at the sensation.

Simon is feeling playful, whispering into the space between kisses,

“Have you been a good boy this year?”

Simon’s hand follows the curve of Wille’s waist, settling on his hip before resting on Wille’s growing erection, massaging his bulge as he awaits a response. His grey sweatpants don’t leave much to the imagination, but Simon is too focused on the spreading flush and his own arousal that he hardly notices the wet patch forming between them.

Will coo’s quietly, preening into the touch, bucking his hips to meet Simon’s kneading, matching his rhythm.

“You’re always such a good boy for me, aren’t you, Wille?”

Wille responds on the lust side of desperation,

“Yes, yes, yes…”

Simon continues his ministrations, kissing and sucking love bites while rubbing Wille’s now fully hard cock through too many layers of clothes. He fiddles with his waist band, hesitant to go any further without confirmation from Wille. Wille encourages him by pushing the elastic down so his cock springs free between the two of them, throbbing, aching to be touched.

“I’m going to make you feel so good, baby. Give you everything you didn’t know you needed.”

Wille arches into every touch as Simon’s hand finds his velvety smooth cock, leaking with precum and desperate for release.

“Please, Simme. I need you.”

Wille’s voice is low, husky with desire as he begs,

“Use me…”

The words linger between them, Simon’s breath caught in his throat at the raw, vulnerability of such a request. The heat behind the words and the way Wille is begging, ignite a fire that Simon doesn’t want to put out. Before losing himself entirely in the task at hand, Simon separates himself from Wille, kneeling back before getting up from the couch to retrieve lube.

“Stay right there baby. Keep your hands off your cock, that’s mine. I’m going to go get some lube and then I promise I’ll take such good care of you.”

Wille is panting, nodding at the words as they leave his mouth. He is a gorgeous, desperate mess; auburn hair out of place and bruises forming while his cock stands at attention between them. He is nodding furiously, eyes pleading while he watches Simon retreat to the bedroom for their necessities.

He takes his time, undressing carefully and leaving his outfit neatly folded on the bed before doing a once over in the bathroom mirror, lube in hand and looking like sin.

Simon takes his time, walking with a cool composure that completely contradicts his filthy thoughts and rapid-fire heartbeat. He maintains the facade as he approaches Wille, naked and beckoning for more.

Wille’s quiet gasp at his entry sends a prickle of heat through his system, leaving goosebumps in their wake at the way Wille’s mouth waters and eyes scan his naked body, up and down.

Simon musters all the composure he can manage before directing Wille,

“First, I’m going to prep myself, open myself up real nice so I can ride you how I want.”

Simon’s eyebrows twitch up, an amused silence question between the two as Wille opens his mouth, only to shut it again.

“What is it baby?”

“How do you want to… ride me?”

Simon can’t help but smile, straddling Wille and leaning in for a soft kiss before answering,

“I want to use your cock to chase my own pleasure, cum untouched from the way you feel inside me. I want to ride you until I’m raw and twitching from overstimulation at just how much you make me feel, simply by being you. And I want you to sit back and watch it all.”

Wille flushes a deep red, groaning out loud at the dirty talk, rutting subconsciously at Simon who is resuming his position straddling Wille, rock hard and aching heat.

Simon uncaps the lube, sighing with a little extra flair as he anticipates the cool gel on his taint. He squeezes a generous amount on his fingers before reaching behind him to open himself up, aware of Wille’s attentive gaze. His eyes are filled with awe and wonder as he looks at his profile; chiseled jaw, toned chest, delicate happy trail, hard cock, strong thighs. Simon feels powerful, like he’s holding court.

Simon teases himself ever so slightly before allowing a finger to breach his tight rim, soaked with enough lube to make the filthiest sound as he gently guides it in and out.

Simon finds his rhythm, fucking himself on his fingers with hooded eye lids and a desperate audience. He feels Wille shift beneath him occasionally, hands finding purchase on his thighs, stroking the muscles while watching in awe.

Wille whispers encouragements to him until Simon can’t take it anymore. His fingers aren’t long enough, and the angle isn’t quite right, he’s desperate for release and he needs Wille just as badly as Wille needs him.

“I’d like to ride you now, if that’s okay?”

Simon smiles, adjusting his position while he awaits an answer. Wille confirms,

“More than okay. Take me, babe. Use me… I want to feel you come apart on my cock.”

And who was Simon to deny Wille such a luxury? His breath hitches as he aligns Wille’s hard, wet head with his puckering hole.

“Fuckkkk…..”

Simon can’t help but groan, each inch taking his breath away until he is bottomed out, flush to Wille’s neatly trimmed bush while he allows himself a moment to adjust.

“Fuck Simme, you’re so tight. So warm. You look so hot on my cock.”

Simon begins slow experimental movements, circling his hips, feeling every nudge of Wille’s cock head on his prostate when the angle is just right. Simon feels so entirely full. It’s a sensation that is equally vulnerable and empowering. The pleasure feels overwhelming in the best way possible. Every low grown from Wille’s wet mouth challenges Simon to pick up the pace, faster and harder, taking exactly what he needs when he needs it.

Simon can feel his orgasm approaching as he rides Wille with a brutal rhythm that takes, takes, takes. Wille is panting alongside him, cock twitching deep in Simon’s core. Wille’s hands remain present, grounding and available but not controlling, not moving. He is allowing Simon every liberty as his movements become erratic; desperate, filthy, sloppy, and hot.

“That’s it baby, use me. I’m yours, Simon. I’ll always be yours.”

At that, Simon wails, cumming untouched all over Wille’s chest while his muscles spasm around Wille’s cock. Simon lets his white-hot orgasm rip through his system while he grinds down, moans echoing off the walls of the apartment.

Simon collapses forward, Wille still inside him, twitching with desire but patiently waiting his instructions while Simon quivers from the aftermaths of such a strong climax. Simon guides his hand, reaching around to where they are connected, encouraging Wille to feel his rim, stretched deliciously over his length.

Simon whispers,

“I’m not done with you, yet… I’m going to ride you until you’re painted in my cum and begging me for release.”

Wille takes a sharp inhale in at the tone. Simon revels in the authority, thoroughly enjoying the tight rope walk between seemingly oppositional ideas; dominant dynamics and anal receiving.

Wille rocks underneath him, sexual frustration bubbling from those beautiful brown eyes and slightly parted lips. Simon allows it, indulges it even, rocking against him until Wille is biting the inside of cheeks and Simon’s halfway hard again.

Simon begins to lift himself up, nearly pulling out before slamming back down. He forces his eyes open to watch Wille’s face contort in awe as he lowers himself of his cock. He does it again, drops himself down at an unsustainable but divine pace; repeating the process of lifting and dropping until both men are whining, bucking, rutting, rolling and moaning.

Simon can sense Wille’s close, the way his brows are knit together in concentration, so focused on being good for Simon, letting him take without asking anything in return. Fatigue is settling into his muscles, a soreness that will pale to that of his abused rim but make him smile nonetheless as the memory.

Simon places his hands on Wille’s pecs, supporting himself as he changes the angle, shifting positions while he grinds down hard, relentless until he feels Wille let go, spasming inside him, pushing him over the edge for the second time tonight.

Simon paints Wille’s chest again, feeling his lovers release deep inside as they collapse onto one another; sticky, sweaty, satiated, and spent.

As both men catch their breath, Simon whispers into the space between them,

“You are so good, mi amor. All I ever want is you.”

Wille kisses Simon’s shoulder, a sweet response, unspoken but laden with love.

Chapter Text

The days and weeks pass with a new rhythm, steady and building, a routine that nurtures their budding relationship with a passion that can hardly be mistaken for temporary. Wille brings Simon coffee in the mornings they start apart while Simon packs extra clementines to share with Wille during their shared lunch period. Simon cooks and Wille cleans. More often than not, they are falling asleep in one another’s arms, limbs heavy as orgasm pulls them into a deep, safe slumber.

Wille is learning more about Simon. The way he embraces chosen family while keeping in touch with his mother and sister, halfway across the globe. He watches as Simon navigates all of the extracurricular activities that come with being a music teacher and choir director. He smiles as Simon teaches sheet music to kids after school and records auditions to be submitted to various arts programs across the country. He is exactly what public schools need; someone as talented as they are passionate, as kind as they are patient.

It is such a privilege to be able to watch someone you love in their element. Wille doesn’t take it for granted, reveling in the way Simon gives back to the community at large by nurturing the young creatives within in. He considers young Simon, escaping to such an outlet amidst the turmoil at home, transforming his own pain to something beautiful.

They write quietly curled up on Wille’s couch with a lofi lyrical R&B album playing in the background. Simple prose evolves into stream of consciousness poetry that nurtures his inner child who never thought a love like this was possible. Single lyrics develop into full songs as love heals the lingering keloids left by careless lovers of Simon’s past.

Wille is such an expressive person, not even realizing his own hums of reflection as he writes and writes and writes. Some days are easier than others, words flowing out of him as if they need to be recorded just as much as Wille needs to write them. He feels sweet Simme tickling his ankle with his toes, tracing small circles on the bony prominence sticking out from his sweatpants before following the muscle up his calf. The touch is grounding, enough to shift his focus and bring him back to the moment.

Simon’s looking at him expectantly, slow smile spreading across his face as he asks,

“What do you want for Christmas, my love?”

While Wille could take the question at face value, listing gift ideas to his lover, mischief wins out, challenging him to respond to that twinkle in Simon’s eye instead.

Wille closes his notebook, pen holding its place as it rests on the coffee table where his feet just were.  Maintaining eye contact, Wille crawls across the couch playfully before breaking out in song;

🎶 All I want for Christmas 🎶

🎶 isssss youuuuuu 🎶

Wille holds the notes with an off-tune dedication that makes Simon a giggling mess, the exact desired effect Wille was hoping for. He doesn’t waste a moment, climbing over his lover to wrap him in a bear hug while peppering him with kisses.

Wille feels Simon’s hands on his waist, pulling him closer so their chests are flush, separated only by the well-loved hoodies they threw on to lounge in, after dinner.

In the most adorable tone, Simon teases Wille,

“Simppp”

before tickling Wille’s sides. The response is immediate and dramatic, Wille can’t help the way he flails and arches away from the touch, panicked laughter carrying through his apartment as Simon continues his torture. Without missing a beat, Simon uses the leverage to wrestle him, flipping Wille on his back so their positions are reversed. Wille lets out the most adorable, surprised yelp which he would be far more embarrassed about if Simon wasn’t looking at him with lust filled eyes and adorably flushed cheeks…

Simon doesn’t hesitate, leaning in to kiss his throat and neck with unhurried reverence. Wille enjoys the worship, humming contentedly at Simon’s ministrations.

“Have you been a good boy this year?”

Wille’s lids are low, feeling Simon’s hand follow the curve of his waist, down to his hip before settling on his quickly forming erection. Simon massages his bulge with the perfect pressure while Wille is already leaking precum through his sweats. He could be embarrassed at how Simon’s touch effects him but that would be such a waste of time when he could revel in it, enjoying the pleasure of his lover rather than indulging in his own self-consciousness.

Will coo’s quietly, preening into the touch, bucking his hips to meet Simon’s kneading, matching his rhythm.

“You’re always such a good boy for me, aren’t you, Wille?”

Wille responds, voice dripping with lustful desperation,

“Yes, yes, yes…”

Simon continues his ministrations, kissing and sucking love bites while rubbing Wille’s now fully hard cock through too many layers of clothing. Simon fiddles with his waist band, waiting patiently for Wille’s consent, which he enthusiastically gives, shoving his sweatpants down so his aching cock is exposed between them. God, he needs Simon in any way he is willing to give.

“I’m going to make you feel so good, baby. Give you everything you didn’t know you needed.”

Wille arches into every touch as Simon’s hand finds his throbbing cock, leaking with precum and desperate for release.

“Please, Simme. I need you.”

Wille’s voice is low, husky with desire as he begs.

“Use me…”

He trusts Simon. Wille wants to give Simon everything; his mind, his heart, his body… He wants to let go of his autonomy; his body, an instrument, used to draw beautiful noises out of his handsome lover. He wants Simon to use him. He trusts Simon to use him.

Simon processes Wille’s words with direct eye contact; adorning, affectionate and so full of lust he thinks they both might combust.

Simon assumes the role of dominance with ease, separating himself from Wille, kneeling back before getting up from the couch to retrieve lube.

“Stay right there baby. Keep your hands off your cock, that’s mine. I’m going to go get some lube and then I promise I’ll take such good care of you.”

The words make his cock twitch. Fuck.

Wille is panting, nodding in agreement, eyes pleading while he watches Simon retreat to the bedroom for their necessities. Wille loves the anticipation, the unknown of letting someone else use you for their pleasure. Will Simon use his hands or mouth or ass or cock? The endless options are interrupted as Simon slowly returns, sauntering with well earned confidence because god dammit he looks like a greek god, sinfully gorgeous.

Wille’s quiet gasp at his entry sends a prickle of heat through his system, leaving goosebumps in their wake at the way Wille’s mouth waters and eyes scan his naked body, up and down.

Simon musters all the composure he can manage before directing Wille,

“First, I’m going to prep myself, open myself up real nice so I can use your cock, ride you how I want.”

Simon’s eyebrows twitch up, an amused silence question between the two as Wille opens his mouth, only to shut it again.

“What is it baby?”

“How do you want to… ride me, I mean?”

Simon can’t help but smile, straddling Wille and leaning in for a soft kiss before answering,

“I want to use your cock to chase my own pleasure, cum untouched from the way you feel inside me. I want to ride you until I’m raw and twitching from overstimulation at just how much you make me feel, simply by being you. And I want you to sit back and watch it all.”

Wille flushes a deep red, groaning out loud at the dirty talk, rutting subconsciously at Simon who is resuming his position straddling Wille, rock hard and aching heat.

Simon uncaps the lube, sighing with a little extra flair as he anticipates the cool gel on his taint. He squeezes a generous amount on his fingers before reaching behind him to open himself up. Wille can’t help but stare, eyes filled with awe and wonder as he looks at the man straddling him; chiseled jaw, toned chest, delicate happy trail, hard cock, strong thighs. Simon is a god, holding power in his own pleasure while making Wille feel so desired.

Simon teases himself ever so slightly before allowing a finger to breach his tight rim, soaked with enough lube to make the filthiest sound as he gently guides it in and out.

Simon finds his rhythm, fucking himself on his fingers with hooded eye lids and Wille’s attentive gaze. He feels Wille shift beneath him occasionally, hands finding purchase on his thighs, stroking the muscles while watching in awe.

Wille whispers encouragements to him until Simon can’t take it anymore. His fingers aren’t long enough, and the angle isn’t quite right, he’s desperate for release and he needs Wille just as badly as Wille needs him.

“I’d like to ride you now, if that’s okay?”

Simon smiles, adjusting his position while he awaits an answer. Wille confirms,

“More than okay. Take me, babe. Use me… I want to feel you come apart on my cock.”

Simon doesn’t prolong the torture any longer, lowering himself on Wille’s leaking cock with a patience and restraint that should be applauded.

“Fuckkkk…..”

Simon can’t help but groan, each inch taking his breath away until he is bottomed out, flush to Wille’s neatly trimmed bush while he allows himself a moment to adjust.

“Fuck Simme, you’re so tight. So warm. You look so hot on my cock.”

Simon begins slow experimental movements, circling his hips, feeling every nudge of Wille’s cock on his prostate when the angle is just right. Wille watches every movement with equal adoration and lust, feeling Simon’s tight walls stroke his length with each movement. The way Simon takes command of their pleasure, rocking his hips in a way that has both men gasping for air. Every low grown from Wille’s wet mouth challenges Simon to pick up the pace, faster and harder, taking exactly what he needs when he needs it.

Wille can tell Simon is getting close, riding his cock with a brutal rhythm that takes, takes, takes. Wille can’t help but pant, in awe of his lover, overwhelmed by pleasure as he reaches his own peak. Wille’s hands remain present, grounding and available but not controlling, not moving. He fights every instinct of his and succumbs to his lover, allowing Simon every liberty as his movements become erratic; desperate, filthy, sloppy, and hot.

“That’s it baby, use me. I’m yours, Simon. I’ll always be yours.”

At that, Simon wails, cumming untouched all over Wille’s chest while his muscles spasm around Wille’s cock. Simon lets his white-hot orgasm rip through his system while he grinds down, moans echoing off the walls of the apartment.

Simon collapses forward, Wille still inside him, twitching with desire but patiently waiting his instructions while Simon quivers from the aftermaths of such a strong climax. Simon guides his hand, reaching around to where they are connected, encouraging Wille to feel his rim, stretched deliciously over his length.

Simon whispers,

“I’m not done with you, yet… I’m going to ride you until you’re painted in my cum and begging me for release.”

Wille takes a sharp inhale in at the tone. Wille revels in the authority, thoroughly enjoying Simon’s dominance as a power bottom.

Wille can hardly contain his excitement, sexual frustration bubbling over as he rocks ever so slightly under Simon, throbbing cock still aching inside of Simon’s tight heat. Simon allows it, indulges it even, reciprocating the minuscule movements until Wille is biting the inside of cheeks and Simon’s nearly hard again.

Wille eagerly awaits Simon’s instructions; desperate for release but not so much so that he forgets who is in charge. Fortunately, Simon doesn’t make him wait long, lifting himself up, nearly pulling out before slamming back down, hard. The surprise of it nearly makes Wille cum, so overwhelmed by Simon’s tight heat and rough movement. Simon doesn’t shy away from what he started, assuming a punishing rhythm as he rides Wille like he needs it. Before long, Simon is fully hard and leaking precum, cock trapped between their abs as both men whine, buck, rut, roll and moan in tandem.

Wille can feel his orgasm approaching, a freight train of build up pleasure threatening to barrel through at any moment. He waits patiently, concentrating on Simon’s cues, allowing his lover to take everything he needs from Wille.

Simon places his hands on Wille’s pecs, supporting himself as he changes the angle, shifting positions while he grinds down hard, relentless. Wille feels the shift in the air, the focus on him as Simon rides, encouraging him to let go, indulge in Simon’s perfect heat.

Wille’s orgasm rips through him, cock spasming inside of Simon with an intensity that make’s Wille wonder what he ever did to deserve this kind of pleasure. Simon follows him, painting Wille’s chest again as he climaxes for the second time tonight, around Wille’s cock.

As both men catch their breath, Simon whispers into the space between them, quietly but tenderly,

“You are so good, mi amor. All I ever want is you.”

Wille kisses Simon’s shoulder, words failing him, as he holds tight the greatest gift he could have ever received, Simon.

Chapter Text

Simon is coaxing off a migraine with another shot of espresso and all the Christmas cheer he can muster.  You can smell the heat in the modest auditorium, loud HVAC working overtime to stifle the chill that comes with the slick Seattle drizzle. Small, extraordinarily chipper voices echo off of the tall brick walls in anticipation of their holiday concert.

While not particularly religious, Simon couldn’t refuse the opportunity to direct a local children’s choir in their community holiday concert. It feels like a great way to integrate with the community while encouraging children to engage in the arts.

The buzz of adrenaline percolates under the surface, the culmination of a semesters worth of work fueling him in the final hours before curtain call. Simon feels his phone buzz in his pocket but remains too focused on roping off student seating and folding setlist pamphlets to check in with his notifications.

The students have a great idea to string some extra holiday lights along the stage, making it that much more festive and cozy.

Simon’s stomach grumbles but he is too nervous to focus on eating, organizing groups backstage as families and community members filter in through the heavy metal doors. Wet boots squeak against the concrete floors as teenagers chatter amongst themselves, using each other as a mirror, primping and preening before their appearance. The young children are completely unaware; giddy, like any kid at school after hours but hardly because of their investment in the show.

The overhead lights flash their warning for folks in the audience to find their seats while Simon straightens his collar and holiday sweater for the umpteenth time today.

After the lights dim and the rustling settles, Simon makes his way onto the stage with practiced confidence. The audience greets him with a warm applause that settles between them like a hot cup of peppermint tea.

“Good evening, all! I’d like to welcome everyone to this year’s holiday concert.”

The applause continues, affirming and low as Simon squints into the stage light before continuing,

“First to perform tonight is the children’s choir from our very own Lutheran community church. Please give these children a warm welcome as they sing ”

Simon can hear the quiet giggles at the periphery as the kids make their way to the center stage. Simon kneels in front of them, crawling off the stage to the piano where he settles on the bench with nervous excitement. He tests a few keys before counting down. The intro fills the room with the type of holiday cheer that feels nostalgic no matter where you’re from. With each beat, the kids’ quiet voices grow slightly louder, more confident. Simon is in his element, directing impassioned young people with melodious piano as his backdrop.

Each song brings a new round of applause. The twinkling holiday lights making the young one’s glow as they smile wide into the dark audience. Simon keeps his posture straight, eyes focused ahead as he plays from memory each song, they tirelessly practiced over the last several weeks. The hour and a half go by seamlessly with very little stumbling or stress. Everyone is full of cookies and cheer as each child and student line up to take a final bow.

Families congregate at the front of the stage while the overhead lights flicker on. Affirmative mumblings echo through the hall while Simon accepts hugs and high fives from his beaming, budding musicians.

Rosh, Ayub, and Damon wait patiently at the outskirts of the crowd, inching closer with less patience than the students Simon teaches. Finally, it’s their turn,

“Bro, you did so good! It was even better than last years!”

Ayub starts, Rosh rolling her eyes but Damon nodding furiously,

“Seriously! I feel like a proud momma hen after listening to you play the same setlist for four weeks straight! It came together even better than I could have imagined. Plus the little gay fairy lights.”

Damon pretends to sprinkle fairy dust to no one in particular while Rosh gives into the compliments, smirking but sincere when she says,

“It really was great.”

The moment simmers, warm and familiar until the sound of someone clearing their throat brings his attention elsewhere.

Wille stands in an equally ridiculous Christmas sweater that they found together when they went thrifting, last week. He looks perfectly cozy with tapered corduroy pants and Blundstone boots, accessorized with warm gold that blended into his pale skin, holding a winter arrangement of white and green flowers and greens that is fit for a price.

Simon’s breath catches in his throat, eyes meeting Wille’s sheepish gaze with complete adornment and sweet surprise.

“I wasn’t sure if you’d be able to make it.”

Simon managed,

“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”

Wille responds with practiced charm.

God, he so badly wants to take a picture of the stunned look on his friend’s faces as they become bystanders to their hallmark love.

Damon flashes his most dazzling smile, raising an eyebrow in Simon’s direction, indicating a witty and likely unhinged comment to come.

“You must be Wilhelm.”

Damon holds out his hand to shake Wilhelm’s, eyeing him head to toe before continuing,

“Simon, sweetheart, I’m gonna need step by step instructions on how to find one just like him because….”

Damon whistles,

“My god… your description doesn’t do him justice.”

Damon redirects his conversation to Wille,

“You’re hot… And thoughtful too. That is a beautiful arrangement. I am just so glad to finally meet the infamous Wille. You sounded too good to be true but here you are!”

Damon’s teasing is laced with affection, eyes sparkling with sincerity that quiets the secondhand embarrassment Simon has from his over-the-top friend. Simon rolls his eyes at Damon before accepting Wille’s bouquet with a kiss on the cheek.

Rosh clears her throat, awaiting a proper introduction from their best friend.

“Rosh and Ayub this is Wilhelm.”

“Pleased to meet you both. I’ve heard nothing but good things.”

“All of them are bold faced lies”

Rosh quips, wearing a smug smirk. Ayub rolls his eyes, chuckling in agreement but waving with warmth at the introduction.

“The concert was beautiful, Simon. I liked the addition of the little fairy lights. Had you planned that?”

Simon blushed at Wille’s attention to detail.

“You have a good memory. No, I hadn’t planned to have them in advance but when we were setting up today it felt like the room needed something more.”

“You read the room well, it looks magical.”

Simon can’t help but smile wide at his two worlds colliding.

Ayub speaks up next,

“Wille, we were planning on ordering pizza and gaming back at our place, if you want to join? I’m not sure if you’re into that sort of thing but, you are welcome.”

Simon would bring Ayub into the biggest hug imaginable if the thought it wouldn’t embarrass his friend completely. It is so sweet for him to include Wille in their little world and by the look on Wille’s face, he is equally touched.

“I would love to, although I am afraid, I can’t get behind Simon’s pineapple on pizza situation.”

“Ha! Finally, someone with some common sense!”


Rosh nearly shouts, echoing in the rapidly emptying school auditorium.

“It’s pepperoni or bust, am I right Wille?”

Wille returns her banter with ease,

“Oh, absolut!”

Damon interjects,

“I’ll place the order, so it’ll be ready by the time we get back. I’m starved.”

Simon nods in agreement, reaching out for Wille’s hand as they all turn to exit. His friends lead the way, crowding around Damon’s phone while Simon nestles against Wille, connected by interlaced fingers and electricity that is anything but subtle.

“It was really sweet that you came, Wille. And the flowers are seriously gorgeous.”

“I am so glad you liked them. I am just so proud of you. I know how much work you’ve put into this event over the last month, and it is such a privilege to be able to see it come to fruition. You are talented Simme. Anyone can see it. Oh my god, and the kids. They adore you. It’s so adorable to watch.”

Simon isn’t used to so much praise, soaking it in as his lover rambles on.

“You’re too good to me, Wille.”

“Hardly. You deserve nothing less.”

Wille’s smile is toothy, crooked teeth on full display as his eyes search Simon’s in a silent plea, like he is begging him to believe him.

And right now, Simon does.

***

“No fair! Simon, you failed to mention that your boyfriend is fucking hard core at video games!”

Rosh spews while Ayub contests,

“I want a rematch!”

Simon watches Wille smile, mischief on full display. Simon knew that Wille was decent at video games. He had a pretty good idea, anyway. Wille had mentioned before that he played them a lot growing up with Erik, so Simon assumed as much. Whenever the two men are together though, video games are the last thing on their mind, which is to say that Simon didn’t realize just how good Wille was until he watched him settle in between Rosh and Ayub.

“Yeah, he’s pretty amazing.”

Simon adds, winking in Wille’s direction while his friends roll their eyes in tandem.

The night stretched in front of them with comfortable ease. Simon arranged his flowers in a vase that Sara had made for Rosh’s birthday one year and ate greasy pizza with the kind of satisfaction that comes with feeling settled.

His friends are welcoming Wille with open arms, negging him the same way they do each other. It feels extraordinarily comfortable to watch his worlds come together so effortlessly. Simon can’t help the gratitude weighing in his throat, happy tears threatening to fall at just how beautiful his life is, surrounded by love.

***

“Well, that was so much fun!”

Wille mutters as soon as the cool night air hits their faces on their walk back.

“You liked them? You had a nice time?”

“Oh my gosh, the best time Simon. Your friends are great. Damon is funny-I can see why you two work so well as roommates. You balance one another well. Ayub has all of these funny little anecdotes that you would never expect. Like, he comes off super quiet and more reserved and then BAM, he wows everyone with a story or joke out of nowhere. Rosh is fantastic too- what a powerhouse. I see why she was so sought after in the coaching world. I feel like no one messes with her.”

Simon watches Wille’s face with complete adoration. He is so grateful to have a lover that is not just invested in him as an individual but the things and people in his life that matter most. Wille loves him so selflessly and it renders Simon speechless.

“Well, they love you, but I knew that was a given!”


“Really? You think so?”

“Are you serious Wille? You’re the most humble, kind, gentle, passionate, handsome person I know. What’s not to love?”

Wille blushes at that, rosy cheeks darkening further from the relentless wind whipping up the one-way streets. Simon uses it as an excuse to pull him even closer, slipping their hands into his big jacket pocket.

The walk home is short which is a relief given how cool the evening ended up. Upon arriving back to Wille’s both are shivering and shuttering at the damp chill that has settled in their bones.

“Shower?”

Simon grins wide at the suggestion.

“Definitely”

Simon follows Wille’s lead, stripping with casual confidence in the bathroom, stealing glances at his hot boyfriend before stepping into the warm stream. The water stings at first on his icy skin but he unthaws in its wake. Wille has eucalyptus hung by the shower head and its scent fills the small space. Simon doesn’t move, allowing his muscles to relax under the hot water. He closes his eyes, tilting his curls back into the stream to properly soak him head to toe. Simon hears Wille get in, the curtain clueing him in on his boyfriend’s movement as he inches into the small, shared space, still shivering but quiet breath hot as he leans close.

“Trying to steal all the hot water?” Simon mutters, smiling to himself as he threads his fingers through his stiff curls.

“Oh, the hot water is just an excuse to get close to you, Simme.”

Wille’s breath catches before he continues,

“You are a vision.”

Simon blinks away the water from his eyes, meeting Wille’s hungry gaze with a satisfied smirk at the compliment.

Simon reaches out, pulling Wille close so their chests are flush, standing toe to toe in the stream of water. Wille instinctively wraps his arms around Simon’s waist, holding him close while Simon leans into his lover’s chest. He places a sweet kiss, slow at first but backed by a kind of heat that emerges triumphant against even well intentioned will power. Wille hums contentedly, tracing idle patterns on Simon’s lower back and waist, rubbing tempting circles on his hip bones, just to be a tease.

“I liked having you at my show.”

Simon whispers between kisses

“Having you present, seeing you show up for me, bring me flowers… it’s hot.”

Simon can feel Wille nod, the pressure of his hands tightening on his hips, hanging on Simon’s every word as he teases more kisses across his clavicle.

Simon feels his breath quicken, his erection pressing into his thigh after just a few kisses. Simon traces his hands down Wille’s waist, slinking them around his back side to pull him even closer,

“Mhmm I love how responsive you are Wille. How a few simple kisses has you hard and leaking on me”

Wille groans at that, grinding his hips against Simon’s toned leg before bringing his lips to his lover’s ear.

“I love being yours. I love walking into a room and everyone knowing who I belong to. I love seeing you perform with such professional composure, knowing I am the only one who gets to see that pretty mouth scream in pleasure. I revel in being the one you choose to let go with. God, Simon, that’s all I ever want- is to be yours.”

Simon’s stomach clenches, slow burning embers quickly fanning into a fiery heat that can only be stoked by Wille; his mouth, his hands, his body. Rather than fumble for words that will be wholly inadequate after Wille’s poetic confession, Simon reaches up to Wille’s jaw to kiss him.

Simon doesn’t start gentle or slow but rather deep and needy, holding Wille’s jaw firmly while he spins Wille, so his back is against the tiled wall, grinding his own erection against his boyfriends leg as he licks into his mouth.

Simon adjusts his position, bringing his hand between them so he can stroke Wille.

“It’s only you Wille. It’s only you who gets to have me like this, who gets to love me, who gets to fuck me, who gets to make me cum untouched. Fuck, I love seeing my proper boyfriend with flowers and corduroys against the wall, whimpering under my touch. You make me crazy, Wille. God, you’re so hot.”

Wille arches into every touch, chasing pleasure as Simon’s slick hand strokes him. Simon can’t help himself, kissing every square inch of Wille’s chest, feeling him whine all needy and desperate.

“I want you to fuck me Simon, please”

He meets Wille’s clouded eyes, pupils blown and searching for confirmation that Simon will do exactly what he’s asking for. Simon returns his gaze, kissing him gently before whispering,

“Turn around baby, I’m going to open you up for me.”

Wille whines, complying eagerly as he widens his stance for Simon to take him from behind. Simon takes in the sight, Wille’s chest flush to the wall, head craned to the side while his ass juts out for the taking. Simon adjusts the shower head so water cascades down Wille’s back, following its curve to the base of his spine. Simon uses his fingernails, following droplets down their invisible path until goosebumps erupt under his touch.

“You look so pretty like this, Wille, giving yourself to me.”

Wille purrs under the compliment, wiggling with his erection trapped in front of him.

Simon continues his ministrations, teasing Wille with his fingertips, circling his cheeks until he dips a finger to trace where he needs him most. Wille’s hole puckers under his touch, wet and clenching at the sexual tension that is tightly coiling just below the surface.

Simon grabs the lube from the shower caddy, squeezing a generous amount on his fingers so that when he hovers just above Wille’s crack, a drop falls, tracing his crack until it reaches his ball sack. Wille moans as Simon’s dainty finger’s part his cheeks, assuming their position at his hole. Simon’s own erection presses against the back of Wille’s thighs as Simon wets his entrance before pressing one finger past the tight muscle. Wille moans at the intrusion, pressing back into Simon’s hand at the contact, always so eager for more.

“Fuck Wille, baby, you’re so tight. I’m going to take such good care of you.”

Simon slowly moves his finger in and out, exploring his partners body carefully, twisting and pressing until he finds Wille’s prostate, eliciting a desperate plea of ‘more’ from his lover. Simon happily obliges, sliding a second finger in next to his first, fingering Wille with a tender passion. Simon is sure he will never tire of the feeling, Wille tight around him, making the most glorious sounds at his doing.

Before long, Wille can take three fingers, rutting back against Simon’s hand with desperation that says he needs more.

Simon can’t help his own groan as coats his aching cock in lube before lining it up with Wille’s tight ass. Simon uses one hand to ground Wille, holding him in place while the other guides his length in. The feeling is blinding, pleasure beyond measure as he slides deeper into Wille until he is fully seated in his lover. Wille cries out, a high-pitched whine that shows no sign of control as he lets pleasure wrap around him like the steam of their shower. Simon slides in and out slowly, allowing Wille to adjust to his sizable length before assuming a faster pace. 

Both of Simon’s hands rest on Wille’s hips for leverage. Simon focuses on the view, Wille’s ass swallowing him so well as he moves deliciously slow. Simon is trying to ground himself, determined not to cum before properly pleasing Wille.

“Mhmm ready… I want you to take me, Simme. Fuck me, hard baby, I need you.”

Simon can’t help but moan at Wille’s words, dirty with just the right amount of intimacy to drive him crazy. Simon doesn’t make him wait, gripping Wille’s wet body hard before thrusting all the way in, holding Wille in place as he takes and takes and takes.

Simon feels the drag of his cock along Wille’s prostate, the way each hard thrust makes Wille quiver until the slick sounds of their bodies mix with the moans of both men. Simon is doing everything in his power to hold off, feeling Wille’s orgasm approach as he ruts back against Simon erratically, body pliant under his touch. Simon continues his brutal rhythm, feeling Wille clench around him. He leans in close, moving one hand from Wille’s hip to his shoulder where he holds him steady as he whispers,

“Show me you’re mine, baby. Cum for me.”

Simon feels Wille let go, cumming loudly, spasming around his cock with enough force to bring Simon over the edge as well. Simon fills Wille up, bringing the arm that was on his shoulder around his lover’s stomach, supporting Wille’s weight as he quivers beneath him.

The warm water washes over them both until Simon’s softening cock is expelled by Wilhelm whose hands cling to Simon at the sudden emptiness. Simon holds Wille close in the steam until their loose and tired limbs become too heavy to stand. Wille turns in Simon’s arms, facing him with a post-orgasmic glow that threatens to make Simon hard all over again. Simon strokes his rosy cheek bones, placing gentle kisses on his chin and lips before hugging him,

“Jag älskar dig”


Wille hums, smiling in the crook of his neck,

“I love you too, Simon”

As they pull apart, Wille’s sweet smile turns into a cheesy grin,

“You know, you’ve kind of ruined me for anyone else? Like, I don’t think it’ll ever feel like this with anyone else.”

Simon can’t help his chuckle, goofy and bright in the quiet steam of the bathroom,

“Good, that was my goal. You and me, forever.”

Simon teases but the words hold a quiet truth. Wille returns the smile,

“Be careful Mr. Erikkson, or I might just take you up on that.”

“I’m betting on it, Lavender Pretty Boy.”

Chapter Text

Wille is so excited for Simon’s holiday concert tonight! Over the last several weeks, he’s marveled as his lover poured all of his effort into his work; tirelessly training students and organizing the space so that the night could be as magical as the season unfolding them around them.

Wille is eager to celebrate him, even if a bouquet of flowers feels a touch cliche. For a moment, Wille’s anxiety threatened to take root, but that voice was quickly quieted by the consistent reassurance Simon gives that he is equally invested in them.

Wille finds a flower shop to make him a simple winter bouquet of whites and greenery. Although he doesn’t consider himself particularly rustic, Wille loves the look of cedar and evergreen with white roses, hydrangeas, and peonies. He explained his vision which the florist executed beautifully with a whimsy that suggested they were grateful for a low stakes’ arrangement. Wille smiles quietly, looking at the shelves with wood wick candles and journals whose thick pages catch his attention which is quickly deterred by the fact that they aren’t spiral bound.

The arrangement is breathtaking in its warm simplicity, rivaling his lover but failing to compete with Simon’s beauty. Wille pays, graciously complimenting the florist before taking their masterpiece to his Garfield for the event.

The night sky envelops the school, bright light shining out of the double doors to the auditorium, a beacon drawing folks near like bugs to a light. Wille walks into his workplace with excitement buzzing just below the surface of his skin, eagerly anticipating seeing Simon in his professional element.

Wille can hardly believe how different the auditorium looks in the evening light, beautiful Christmas lights illuminating the stage with the kind of soft warmth that only comes with being there after hours without the pressure of the workday.

Wille finds a single seat slotted along the middle aisle so he can see the piano gracing the center of the stage. The throne for his prince. The final flash of overhead lights indicates the show will start soon, encouraging everyone to take their seats before the performance begins. Wille does his best to remain calm, bouquet perched neatly between his legs to allow more space for folks still finding a spot.

A hush falls over the room with pregnant anticipation; muffled movements in squeaky old auditorium seats and low murmurs between loved ones until the spotlight illuminates center stage and the quiet click of loafers bring attention to Simon standing center stage in the Christmas sweater they found together a couple of weeks ago. His curls are defined, eyes dark and sparkling with excitement. His posture is rehearsed, a pianist at heart with a straight back and sleek pleated slacks. He looks like a vision as he grabs the microphone to introduce the performance,

“Good evening, all! I’d like to welcome everyone to this year’s holiday concert.”

The applause erupts, excitement bubbling over as everyone hangs on Simon’s every word.

“First to perform tonight is the children’s choir from our very own Lutheran community church. Please give these children a warm welcome as they sing.”

Children emerge from the periphery as Simon directs their positioning before swiftly crawling off stage to the piano. the entire time, he wears a smile so genuine that anyone else might have thought it performative, if they didn’t know him. Wille can’t help his own secondhand joy, absorbing every bit of Simon’s radiance from afar as he plays the opening notes of the first song.

The melody is the type of holiday cheer that feels nostalgic no matter where you’re from. The children’s voices grow in volume and confidence as the crowd hums appreciatively.

Simon is radiant, glowing as he plays the piano with ease and elegance. Each song brings a new round of applause, cheering that matches the crescendo of the upbeat holiday tracks. Wille’s cheeks hurt from smiling, bobbing along like the jovial tune for an hour and a half. Everyone is full of cookies and cheer as each child and student line up to take a final bow.

Families congregate at the front of the stage while the overhead lights flicker on. Affirmative mumblings echo through the hall. It is so clear, even from a far, that all of the kids respect and admire Simon so much if their proud faces followed by their insistent hugs and high fives are any indication.

Wille waits patiently while the crowd thins, noticing three folks surrounding Simon with proud smiles that match his own. As he approaches, he realizes it’s Simon’s roommate, Damon and his two best friends, Rosh and Ayub.

He listens on the outskirts of their conversation, waiting patiently.

“Bro, you did so good! It was even better than last years!”

Ayub starts, Rosh rolling her eyes but Damon nodding furiously,

“Seriously! I feel like a proud momma hen after listening to you play the same setlist for four weeks straight! It came together even better than I could have imagined. Plus the little gay fairy lights.”

Damon pretends to sprinkle fairy dust to no one in particular while Rosh gives into the compliments, smirking but sincere when she says,

“It really was great.”

Wille watches with a fondness that he anticipates growing for this group of Simon’s closest friends as he listens to their banter. When a pause in the conversation comes, Wille steps forward, clearing his throat to greet his extraordinarily talented and handsome boyfriend.

He feels smug as Simon returns his stare with adornment and surprise. Simon breaks the silence first,

“I wasn’t sure if you’d be able to make it.”

The thought makes Wille chuckle, but he doesn’t let it show, responding sincerely,

“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”

Damon is the first to break their hallmark Christmas card with a quirked eyebrow and dazzling smile,

“You must be Wilhelm.”

Damon holds out his hand to shake Wilhelm’s, eyeing him head to toe before continuing,

“Simon, sweetheart, I’m gonna need step by step instructions on how to find one just like him because….”

Damon whistles,

“My god… your description doesn’t do him justice.”

Damon redirects his conversation to Wille,

“You’re hot… And thoughtful too. That is a beautiful arrangement. I am just so glad to finally meet the infamous Wille. You sounded too good to be true but here you are!”

Wille can feel his blush reach from under his collar to his ears at the attention and compliments. Simon has described Damon well enough that Wille shouldn’t be surprised at the flirty charm but the real-life experience exceeds all such preconceptions.

Wille watched as Simon rolls his eyes at Damon before learning into Wille’s orbit to accept his bouquet with a kiss on the cheek.

Rosh clears her throat, awaiting a proper introduction from a blushing Simon.

“Rosh and Ayub this is Wilhelm.”

“Pleased to meet you both. I’ve heard nothing but good things.”

“All of them are bold faced lies”

Rosh quips, wearing a smug smirk. Ayub rolls his eyes, chuckling in agreement but waving with warmth at the introduction.

“The concert was beautiful, Simon. I liked the addition of the little fairy lights. Had you planned that?”

Simon’s cheeks turn a gorgeous shade of pink at the comment responding,

“You have a good memory. No, I hadn’t planned to have them in advance but when we were setting up today it felt like the room needed something more.”

“You read the room well, it looks magical.”

Ayub speaks up next,

“Wille, we were planning on ordering pizza and gaming back at our place, if you want to join? I’m not sure if you’re into that sort of thing but, you are welcome.”

Wille is surprised at the offer but delighted at the prospect. The thought of getting to know people closest to Simon makes him giddy. Every new side of his lover that he discovers feels so special, sacred. Wille wants to spend his life learning and relearning every variation of Simon, relishing in every discovery and transition that comes with age and growth.

Shaking the deep thoughts from his core, Wille responds with humor, eager to accept;

“I would love to, although I am afraid, I can’t get behind Simon’s pineapple on pizza situation.”

“Ha! Finally, someone with some common sense!”

Rosh nearly shouts, echoing in the rapidly emptying school auditorium.

“It’s pepperoni or bust, am I right Wille?”

Wille returns her banter with ease,

“Oh, absolut!”

Damon interjects,

“I’ll place the order, so it’ll be ready by the time we get back. I’m starved.”

Wille is giddy with anticipation, even more so when Simon reaches out to hold his hand as they exit. They two walk in tandem behind Simon’s friend group, interlocked fingers and sappy smiles. Simon breaks the silence first,

“It was really sweet that you came, Wille. And the flowers are seriously gorgeous.”

“I am so glad you liked them. I am just so proud of you. I know how much work you’ve put into this event over the last month, and it is such a privilege to be able to see it come to fruition. You are talented Simme. Anyone can see it. Oh my god, and the kids. They adore you. It’s so adorable to watch.”

“You’re too good to me, Wille.”

“Hardly. You deserve nothing less.”

Wille can’t wipe his wide smile off his face however his eyes remain determined, love and truth begging Simon to believe him.

He deserves the world.

***

“No fair! Simon, you failed to mention that your boyfriend is fucking hard core at video games!”

Rosh spews while Ayub contests,

“I want a rematch!”

Wille is barely managing to contain his smug grin as Simon’s friends realize that Wille is, in fact, excellent at video games. Years of competing with an older brother who never went easy on him made him a wicked opponent. Ever since Erik’s passing, Wille doesn’t play alone. The prospect of doing so is still a bit too heavy with grief to be considered a fun way to pass the time. Gaming was always something they did together as brother’s and the thought of doing it alone just reminds Wille of how much he misses Erik.

Playing with Rosh and Ayub feels healing, a way to enjoy the hobby he used to love in a low pressure, joyful environment with the memory of Erik lingering like a rainbow in the distance.

Simon chuckles through a smile, responding to his friends teasing,

“Yeah, he’s pretty amazing.”

winking in Wille’s direction while the cheerful trio rolls their eyes.

The night stretches in front of them with comfortable ease. Simon arranges Wille’s gift in a vase of Rosh’s that Sara had apparently made for her years ago. The four of them eat greasy pizza and joke between video game rematches until everyone’s eyes were heavy.

Wille is overwhelmed with love and friendly negging that assures him, he belongs.

***

“Well, that was so much fun!”

Wille whispers into the wind as the cool night air takes their breath away.

“You liked them? You had a nice time?”

“Oh my gosh, the best time Simon. Your friends are great. Damon is funny-I can see why you two work so well as roommates. You balance one another well. Ayub has all of these funny little anecdotes that you would never expect. Like, he comes off super quiet and more reserved and then BAM, he wows everyone with a story or joke out of nowhere. Rosh is fantastic too- what a powerhouse. I see why she was so sought after in the coaching world. I feel like no one messes with her.”

Simon listens to Wille’s rambling with soft eyes and warmth despite the chilly temperature.

“Well, they love you, but I knew that was a given!”

“Really? You think so?”

“Are you serious Wille? You’re the most humble, kind, gentle, passionate, handsome person I know. What’s not to love?”

Wille can’t mask his blush despite his already rosy cheeks. Luckily, Simon doesn’t give him a moment to second guess, pulling him close, slipping their hands into his big jacket pocket.

The walk home is short, and the threshold greets them with groaning heat, a feeble attempt at warming them from the cold. Wille knows just what to do,

“Shower?”

Simon grins wide at the suggestion before responding,

“Definitely”

Simon follows Wille’s lead, stripping with casual confidence in the bathroom, stealing glances at each other as the layers peel off. Wille watches as Simon steps into the stream of water, unthawing himself.

The smell of eucalyptus wraps around them, clinging to the steam of the shower. Wille steps in after giving Simon a minute to adjust to the hot temperature.

He is met with his Greek god of a boyfriend, leaning back with his eyes closed, rinsing his curls while the rest of the water cascades down his strong core, following the path of every carved muscle until it reaches the shower floor. Wille takes the opportunity to move close, admiring his boyfriend, with all thoughts of his own chill forgotten.

“Trying to steal all the hot water?” Simon mutters, smirk curling at the edge of his smile as he continues to thread his fingers through his curls.

“Oh, the hot water is just an excuse to get close to you, Simme.”

Wille’s breath catches before he continues,

“You are a vision.”

Wille watches Simon emerge from his reverie, blinking away the water from his eyes before returning Wille’s hungry gaze.

Simon reaches out, pulling Wille close so their chests are flush, standing toe to toe in the stream of water. Wille wraps his arms around Simon’s waist instinctively, holding him close while Simon leans into his touch. Simon places a sweet kiss, slow at first but increasingly passionate as the minute stretches before them. Wille hums contentedly, tracing idle patterns on Simon’s lower back and waist, rubbing tempting circles on his hip bones, just to be a tease.

“I liked having you at my show.”

Simon whispers between kisses

“Having you present, seeing you show up for me, bring me flowers… it’s hot.”

Wille nods in response, tightening his grip on Simon’s hips as each kiss to his clavicle and chest stoke the fire in his lower belly. Wille is putty in Simon’s hands, marveling at each touch as he feels Simon’s hardness press against his own thigh. Simon wraps his arms former, grabbing Wille’s ass to use as leverage to the gentle friction they are both chasing.

“Mhmm I love how responsive you are Wille. How a few simple kisses has you hard and leaking on me”

Wille groans at that, grinding his hips against Simon’s toned leg before bringing his lips to his lover’s ear.

“I love being yours. I love walking into a room and everyone knowing who I belong to. I love seeing you perform with such professional composure, knowing I am the only one who gets to see that pretty mouth scream in pleasure. I revel in being the one you choose to let go with. God, Simon, that’s all I ever want- is to be yours.”

Wille can’t help the feeling pulling at him, drawing Simon into the lust that is clouding his vision like the steam fogging up the tiny bathroom window; hiding their escapades from the sleepy evergreens drooping under the weight of the heavy night sky.

Simon doesn’t let the silence linger, reaching to Wille’s jaw, pulling him into a deep and needy kiss. Simon’s grip is firm, despite the water, pivoting their positions so that Wille is pressed up against the tiled wall, held secure by Simon’s wandering hands and greedy mouth. Wille can feel Simon’s erection even better from this angle, his own still trapped between them while they rut and kiss and lick and nip; loving one another in every way they know how.

When the pressure nearly feels like too much, Simon adjusts their positions, bringing his hand from its perch on Wille’s neck to his throbbing cock, stroking him where he needs it most.

“It’s only you Wille. It’s only you who gets to have me like this, who gets to love me, who gets to fuck me, who gets to make me cum untouched. Fuck, I love seeing my proper boyfriend with flowers and corduroys against the wall, whimpering under my touch. You make me crazy, Wille. God, you’re so hot.”

Wille arches into every touch, chasing pleasure as Simon’s slick hand strokes him with perfect pressure. Simon’s kissing every square inch of Wille’s chest, and Wille can’t help the desperate whines that escape at each gentle suckle.

“I want you to fuck me Simon, please”

Simon meets his gaze, pupils blown and searching for confirmation before eagerly accepting the proposition. Simon looks wrecked and desperate in a way that makes Wille feel so deliciously wanted.

“Turn around baby, I’m going to open you up for me.”

Wille whines, complying eagerly as he widens his stance for Simon to take him from behind. Wille arches his back, offering himself to Simon as his lover adjusts the shower head so the water cascades down Wille’s back, following its curve to the base of his spine. Simon uses his fingernails, following droplets down their invisible path until goosebumps erupt under his touch.

“You look so pretty like this, Wille, giving yourself to me.”

Wille purrs under the compliment, wiggling with his erection trapped in front of him.

Simon doesn’t give him any reprieve, continuing his ministrations, teasing Wille with his fingertips, circling his cheeks until he dips a finger to trace where he needs him most. Wille’s hole puckers under his touch, wet and clenching at the sexual tension that is tightly coiling just below the surface.

Wille hears Simon grab the lube from the shower caddy. The pop of the cap and squeeze of the liquid makes his mouth water and legs quiver. He feels Simon lean in to touch him, an extra drop falling, tracing his crack until it reaches his ball sack. The unexpected sensation makes him dizzy with want. Wille can’t help his guttural moan as Simon’s dainty finger’s part his cheeks, assuming their position at his hole. Wille can feel Simon’s hard length pressed against the back of his thighs as his wet finger circles his entrance before pushing past the tight muscle. Wille moans at the intrusion, pressing back into Simon’s hand at the contact, already eager for more.

“Fuck Wille, baby, you’re so tight. I’m going to take such good care of you.”

Simon slowly moves his finger in and out, exploring Wille’s body carefully, twisting and pressing until he finds Wille’s prostate. Wille can’t help but beg for ‘more’.

Simon happily obliges, sliding a second finger in next to his first, fingering Wille passionately. Simon is sure he will never tire of the feeling, Wille tight around him, making the most glorious sounds at his doing.

Before long, Wille can take three fingers, and he can’t help but rut against Simon’s hand, aching for his lover to fill him completely.

Hearing Simon coat his own cock in fresh lube feels like an answered prayer. Simon uses one hand to ground Wille, holding him in place while the other guides his length in.

The intrusion is bliss, pleasure overwhelming every sense as he feels Simon slide deeper into his body. Wille can’t help his cry, a high-pitched whine that shows no sign of control as he lets the sensation engulf him. Simon slides in and out slowly, allowing Wille to adjust to his sizable length before assuming a faster pace. Simon’s hands rest on Wille’s hips, steadying them both as Wille takes each thrust Simon gives him.

“Mhmm ready… I want you to take me, Simme. Fuck me, hard baby, I need you.”

Simon listens to him, grabbing more firmly before nearly pulling out, just to slam back in with fervor. The pace is addictive, passionate and rough, making Wille feel whole as Simon drags his cock along Wille’s prostate relentlessly.

Wille can feel the familiar sensation building, an orgasm starting deep in his core, leaving him quivering in anticipation as it builds and builds and builds. He is close, so close , to letting go, to feeling that familiar wave of relief wash over him. Wille tries to meet Simon’s thrusts; erratic, needy, desperate.

Their slick bodies make filthy noises; skin on skin mixed with their soft grunts and moans echoing in their cocoon

Simon continues his brutal rhythm, giving Wille everything he needs while Wille hovers on the precipice, unsure which deep thrust will send him over the edge. Simon leans in close, hot breath on the back of his neck, goosebumps lingering in their wake while his right hand holds his shoulder in place,

“Show me you’re mine, baby. Cum for me.”

Fuckkkkk

I’m yours, I’m yours, I’m yours Simon

The words are his unraveling, Wille cums hard untouched as Simon’s finishes deep inside him simultaneously. Wille clenches around him, squeezing every last drop until their breath stills and muscles relax under the warm water.

Simon holds him close in the steam until their loose and tired limbs become too heavy to stand. Wille turns to face Simon, burying himself in the safety of his neck, not out of embarrassment but rather contentment. Simon strokes his rosy cheek bones, placing gentle kisses on his chin and lips before hugging him,

“Jag älskar dig”

Wille hums, smiling against his soft pulse point,

“I love you too, Simon”

As they pull apart, Wille can’t help his corny grin,

“You know, you’ve kind of ruined me for anyone else? Like, I don’t think it’ll ever feel like this with anyone else.”

Simon chuckles in response, goofy and bright with mirth dancing in his warm irises,

“Good, that was my goal. You and me, forever.”

Wille doesn’t give him a moment to second guess his comment, too delighted at the prospect that Simon might be serious. Wille tests the waters,

“Be careful Mr. Erikkson, or I might just take you up on that.”

Simon holds his gaze, seriousness meeting his sincerity,

“I’m betting on it, Lavender Pretty Boy.”

Me too, Simon, me too.

Chapter Text

Winter break can’t come soon enough! Now that the holiday concert is done, the students have grown increasingly antsy with very little motivation to do anything remotely school related. Similarly, Simon feels his motivation slipping, desperate for a couple of weeks lounging around the city with Wille.

Ever since the holiday concert, his friends have embraced Wille’s presence, eagerly including him with a sincerity that is far more than just being polite. While Wille doesn’t join every pizza game night, he is always invited. Meanwhile, Damon is enjoying having a little extra privacy in their shared apartment, courting a new queen he met at a drag bar after his team miserably lost their rec league championship game. The story is outlandishly adorable, queer as fuck, and so entirely Damon that it makes him smile. He loves seeing his best friend so happy, even if it’s sickening sweet.

One of his few free moments, exchanging dirty clothes at his apartment, Damon shouts from his perch in the living room,

“Honey, what are you getting Wille for Christmas?”

Simon pauses, too long for Damon’s liking as the man emerges at his bedroom door,

“Don’t tell me you haven’t gotten him anything! Simon!”

His tone is joking but reality of the situation hits him like a ton of bricks.

Fuckkk….

Simon feels his phone in his pocket vibrate,

[1 New Message]

besfrenz4lyfe

Damon: NOT SIMON FORGETTING TO GET WILLE A CHRISTMAS GIFT THREE DAYS BEFORE THE HOLIDAY

Before he can even roll his eyes at his roommate, and traitor, staring affectionately at him from the threshold, he feels his phone buzz again.

[3 New Messages]

besfrenz4lyfe

Ayub: BRUHHHHH

Rosh: oh my god Linda would murder you if she knew

Rosh: you’re in so much trouble 😈

Simon can’t help the exasperated groan, giving a stern look at Damon before continuing,

“You’re in so much trouble!”

“Oh, don’t go using your teacher voice on me. Untangle your jockstrap and brainstorm some ideas with the group.”

Simon huffs, affectionately annoyed with a small hum of anxiety as he realizes, shit he really needs to get Wille something and soon.

Simon replies to the thread:

besfrenz4lyfe

Simon: okay but actually… helppppp

Rosh: bath bombs?

Ayub: ….hmm maybe something personal??

Damon: head?

Ayub: ☠️😵

Rosh: @Damon your blocked

Rosh: no Ayub is right

Rosh: something personal suits Wille

Rosh: wait you should do a song for him

Ayub: That’s more what I was thinking

Damon: both???? 🫶🏼

Simon: no that’s actually really cute

Simon: a good idea ROSH AND AYUB

Simon: @Damon if you think I save head for Christmas then you don’t know me at all 😏

Rosh: this is what we get for helping you?

Rosh: Blocked @simon. Only Ayub is safe.

Ayub: 😇😇

Simon can’t help but giggle along with Damon who has stationed himself at the end of Simon’s bed, sprawled out, munching on some lays poppables, keeping him company while he packs up his “Wille overnight bag”.  Simon texts Wille once he’s organized,

Simon: thinking I’m going to stop for some groceries on my way. Any special requests?

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Simon awaits a response, listening to Damon’s latest coffee shop drama while he searches for the other half of a pair of cozy wool socks.

[ 3 New Messages]

Wille: Something warm that we could let simmer for a bit

Wille: I’ve been chilled all day and want something cozy?

Wille: Idk if that makes any sense to you but I’ll happily devour whatever you make

The series of texts make him smile, warm like the chickpea coconut curry he is going to make for them tonight. Damon notices the pause in their conversation, smiling with a glint in his eye as his lovesick roommate.

“Okay, honey… go get your mans and have a good night!”

Damon places a quick kiss on the cheek as he skips out of the room, onto his next adventure.

Simon zips his overfilled and well-loved navy duffle before heading to Wille’s; melodies and lyric ideas running through his head with the clever thought of making a song for Wille as his Christmas gift. It’s a good thing he works well under pressure…

***

Simon walks into Wille’s apartment with full arms; duffle and grocery bags making him look more like a pack mule than an adorable boyfriend.

“Hej!”

Wille greets Simon by ushering to the propped door to grab some of the bags from his very full hands.

“You know, I already know that you’re a big tough guy, you don’t need to prove it by juggling all of this up the elevator! I would have helped!”

Wille’s expression is warm and slightly concerned with a hint of good-natured humor behind it. Simon is hiding any degree of strain, determined not to let it show that he is in fact sweating from lugging everything several blocks from the market, and through the maze that is Wille’s apartment lobby.

“I picked up some ingredients for a coconut chickpea curry. I didn’t think you’d have a rice maker, so I got some of the ready-made stuff just to be sure.”

Wille sets down the various bags on the island, unpacking the items with curiosity and care. Simon can’t help but smile at the sight as he takes off his jacket and shoes before joining Wille hip to hip. Simon bumps their hips together, slipping an arm around Wille’s slightly taller waist for a side hug before joining him in sorting the various ingredients.

Wille reciprocates the squeeze, transitioning to the spot across from him on the kitchen island after putting a new record on. Simon feels so comfortable in the warmth of Wille’s presence, enjoying his company as he scrubs the produce before getting to chopping and dicing the rainbow assortment of vegetables. An old Kota the Friend album plays start to finish as they talk about their respective days. Simon continues his preparations by heart until the curry simmers quietly in the background, growing in depth of flavor until everything is fork tender and cooked through.

“Do you have any Christmas traditions you really enjoy, Wille?”

Simon asks, genuinely curious, reflecting on his own family traditions over the years. Wille takes a moment to seriously consider it before responding,

“We always had Kanelbullar in the morning. My dad is actually an excellent baker although he seldom indulges it. That was my favorite though because it wasn’t formal; we wore our pajamas and ate our Kanelbullar with coffee in front of the fire. It felt picturesque and wholesome. Otherwise, our day is always formal attire with catered meals; holiday parties filled with folks who are too pretentious to enjoy the simplicity of spending the evening with their families.   After Erik passed, the holiday felt even more grim. As kids, we used to make the most out of it, causing trouble and joking around but that decreased as the years went on and Erik’s responsibility to my parents and their company increased. He always found a way to make it fun though. Ever since he died though, the holiday has just felt empty…”

Wille pauses with a sad, contemplative sort of smile before interjecting,

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be a downer.”

The sadness in his eyes nearly brings Simon to tears and without skipping a beat he brings Wille into a firm embrace,

“Hush with that. You are never a downer, Wille. You are the light of my life. You make me so happy every day. It’s okay to let yourself feel all the emotions when they come. I’m here for you, baby.”

He feels Wille’s grip around his waist tighten, a shaky exhale against his curls. Simon can’t help but get sentimental,

“I can’t wait to make so many Christmas memories together. What shall we do first?”

Simon can feel Wille smile as Simon continues,

“We can start by making our own Kanelbullar. It’ll probably have to proof the night before though! And we can enjoy some coffee together after preheating the oven to bake them. Depending on how long that takes, I can think of a few things we could get up to until our breakfast is ready.”

Simon wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, Wille leans back to chuckle at the breath shuttering against his sweater, in the crook of his neck. Simon strokes soothing circles on his back as Wille’s breathing returns to an even cadence, the moment of emotion settling between them, acknowledged but not dwelled upon.

Wille’s large brown eyes return Simon’s gaze, hand stroking his cheek softly before asking,

“What about you Simme? Any fun traditions?”

The warmth settles between them as years flash before his eyes, Simon remembering the years he spent celebrating at home with his mother and sister.

“Don’t laugh…”

This comment elicits a quick smile, rapidly growing as Simon giggles to himself at what he is about to suggest.

“Well, Mama is a nurse, as you know and often times, she worked the holiday… one year when it was especially stressful at the hospital, Mama suggested Sara and I come to the hospital to carol. Ayub’s Ma always watched us on those holidays when she worked but she loved the idea so much that she loaded all of the kids into her ancient astrovan and we caroled.  It was a hit! The patients and staff loved it. I mean, who wouldn’t love a bunch of little kids going room to room singing a hodgepodge of Christmas songs off key. And you know what’s better yet? Ayub’s whole family is Muslim. They don’t even celebrate the holiday. But Amina insisted. She couldn’t stand the idea that anyone would be hurting in the hospital on a holiday that meant so much to them. Anyways, it became a tradition. Every year, even when Ma was off, we would go to the hospital to carol.”

Simon realizes he was lost in the memory, babbling far longer than he initially intended but the look on Wille’s face erases any inclination of self-consciousness. Wille’s eyes are glittering once again with the kind of adoration that feels unearned but consuming.

“Simon, baby, that is so beautiful. Like, really, really beautiful.”

Wille’s smile grows, excitement growing into giddiness as he grips both Simon’s shoulders,

“We have to go! Simon, we have to! How fun would that be?”

“You’d do that?”

Simon asks, slightly surprised as Wille’s eagerness to recreate a childhood memory and engaged in his community like that.

“You know, hospitals aren’t particularly romantic, Wille.”

Wille playfully shoves Simon back,

“Oh, shut up! You know what is romantic? Being with the love of my life and bringing joy to others who are down on their luck. Isn’t that what the holiday is all about?”

In that moment, Simon is not sure he could love Wille anymore. His willingness to drop everything and recreate such a special childhood memory without thinking twice. Simon can’t contain his excitement at the prospect, pulling Wille in for a passionate kiss that seals the deal. Their lips move in an easy, familiar rhythm, the spice of their dinner making their lips raw and hot. It is perfect When they break for breath, Simon is the first to speak,

“So, we will start our day with Kanelbullar, we can prep it together the night before and leave it out to proof overnight so when we wake up, we can just put it in the oven to cook. Then we can crawl back to bed and make good use of the time until the aroma carries through to the bedroom with the kitchen timer. And then, we spend the afternoon at UW’s hospital. Ayub is friends with lots of the medical students since their classes are in the same buildings. I think he is even friendly with some of the professors. Medicine never stops so I am sure if he reaches out, someone will get back to us pretty quickly, even with the short notice. Maybe I’ll do a roast that can sit in the crock pot during the day. Or I could make Pabellon criollo since that is easy enough in the crock pot. What if we hosted, Wille? Like what if we had some of our friends over for dinner after caroling?

“Älskling, that sounds like my idea of a perfect day. I would be so honored to spend the holiday with you, Simme.”

The earnest sincerity in Wille’s voice gives Simon butterflies. He has never really spent this kind of holiday with anyone outside of his immediate family, even when they were dating. It feels so… special. Simon can’t believe he gets to have this with someone. It feels so right.

Now, he just needs to write the perfect song to gift his sweet man to make it the best holiday ever.

Chapter Text

The school year feels like it is never ending. Wille is beginning to understand why exactly teachers rely on movies this time of the year… The students motivation is about as high as Wille’s which is not saying much. He can’t wait for a couple of weeks of peace and quiet, snuggled in with Simon.

The last several weeks have passed in a blur of busyness and chosen family. The way that Rosh, Ayub, and Damon have effortlessly included Wille into their family dynamic makes his heart leap. He feels seen and included in a way that feels so authentic, it makes Wille question how he got so lucky to land here.

Wille has been writing like he is running out of time, which in one sense he is considering Christmas is only a couple of days away and he has yet to complete Simon’s Christmas gift. Wille keeps tweaking this poem in an effort to make it absolutely perfect. While Simon was nothing short of complimentary of his last poem, lavishing him in praise, Wille wants this one to feel complete.

Wille looks out to the sparkling lights of Seattle. The colorful holiday lights strung on all of the cranes makes Wille smile. It is such a city specific way to celebrate and it makes him chuckle at whatever Seattleite insisted that those multicolor bulbs adorn their otherwise very industrial equipment.

I am a work in progress

A poem not yet complete;

Industrial with good bones and a strong work ethic,

the kind that doesn’t get Christmas or Easter off.

I ache to adorn myself;

jewelry and lights that feel far too pretty for an ugly thing like me.

You see it though the heavy night sky.

You ignore the persistent winds and troubling rain.

You appreciate me with every attempt I make to dazzle this city,

really, though, I am just trying to draw that dazzling smile from you.

A text from Simon interrupts his thought process:

[1 New Message] it’s nearly impossible to get them to focus on anything but!

Simon: thinking I’m going to stop for some groceries on my way. Any special requests?

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Wille smiles at the how fortunate he feels to live such a lovely life with Simon, responding with haste but no expectation.

Wille: Something warm that we could let simmer for a bit

Wille: I’ve been chilled all day and want something cozy?

Wille: Idk if that makes any sense to you but I’ll happily devour whatever you make

[Sent]

[Delivered]

Wille returns to writing with warm anticipation nipping at his heels at the thought of Simon returning to his apartment so soon.

———— 

Simon walks into Wille’s apartment with full arms; duffle and grocery bags making him look excruciatingly adorable as he muscles his way through the entry.\

“Hej!”

Wille greets Simon by ushering to the propped door to grab some of the bags from his very full hands.

“You know, I already know that you’re a big tough guy, you don’t need to prove it by juggling all of this up the elevator! I would have helped!”

Wille’s is delighted and only slightly concerned that his lover nearly strained a muscle carrying all of this. He can tell Simon is trying to hide it, but the sweat droplets on his brow and the crest of his hairline give him away. Still, Wille doesn’t say anything, instead, making himself useful by carrying the bags to the kitchen island while Simon explains his grand plan.

“I picked up some ingredients for a coconut chickpea curry. I didn’t think you’d have a rice maker, so I got some of the ready-made stuff just to be sure.”

Wille sets down the various bags, unpacking the items with curiosity and care. It amazes him how Simon is such a talented cook with so many recipes and ideas at the ready. Wille said ‘warm, cozy meal’ and Simon responded with a delicious vegetarian curry. Wille can’t help but be amazing by his boyfriend, pulled from his reverie as Simon bumps their hips together, slipping an arm around Wille’s slightly taller waist for a side hug before joining him in sorting the various ingredients.

Wille reciprocates the squeeze, transitioning to the spot across from him on the kitchen island after putting a new record on.

Wille revels in moments like these; quiet, domestic bliss where he watches Simon dice and prep vegetables with ease, assembling all of the remaining ingredients by muscle memory as they talk about their respective days. Simon’s voice breaks the mellow Kota verse that is playing in the background,

“Do you have any Christmas traditions you really enjoy, Wille?”

The question makes Wille’s heart ache with conflicted emotions as he recounts years of holidays beside his brother, who is no longer with them, and remaining family, who rarely support him.

“We always had Kanelbullar in the morning. My dad is actually an excellent baker although he seldom indulges it. That was my favorite though because it wasn’t formal; we wore our pajamas and ate our Kanelbullar with coffee in front of the fire. It felt picturesque and wholesome. Otherwise, our day is always formal attire with catered meals; holiday parties filled with folks who are too pretentious to enjoy the simplicity of spending the evening with their families.   After Erik passed, the holiday felt even more grim. As kids, we used to make the most out of it, causing trouble and joking around but that decreased as the years went on and Erik’s responsibility to my parents and their company increased. He always found a way to make it fun though. Ever since he died though, the holiday has just felt empty…”

Wille pauses with a sad, contemplative sort of smile before interjecting,

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be a downer.”

The sadness in his eyes nearly brings Simon to tears and without skipping a beat he brings Wille into a firm embrace,

“Hush with that. You are never a downer, Wille. You are the light of my life. You make me so happy every day. It’s okay to let yourself feel all the emotions when they come. I’m here for you, baby.”

Wille tightens his grip, allowing a shaky exhale against Simon’s beautiful curls as he lets his boyfriend hold him close.

“I can’t wait to make so many Christmas memories together. What shall we do first?”

Wille can’t help but smile against Simon’s chest at his energy and persistence,

“We can start by making our own Kanelbullar. It’ll probably have to proof the night before though! And we can enjoy some coffee together after preheating the oven to bake them. Depending on how long that takes, I can think of a few things we could get up to until our breakfast is ready.”

Simon wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, Wille leans back to chuckle, unable to hold his breath as the laughter shakes his chest. Simon continues his sweet ministrations, stroking soothing circles on his back as the moment of emotion settles between them, acknowledged but not dwelled upon.

Wille eagerly changes the topic, curious for the answer as he asks Simon the same question,

“What about you Simme? Any fun traditions?”

Simon’s eyes go foggy with memory before he is chuckling into Wille’s neck,

“Don’t laugh…”

This comment elicits a quick smile, rapidly growing as Simon giggles to himself at what he is about to suggest.

“Well, Mama is a nurse, as you know and often times, she worked the holiday… one year when it was especially stressful at the hospital, Mama suggested Sara and I come to the hospital to carol. Ayub’s Ma always watched us on those holidays when she worked but she loved the idea so much that she loaded all of the kids into her ancient astrovan and we caroled.  It was a hit! The patients and staff loved it. I mean, who wouldn’t love a bunch of little kids going room to room singing a hodgepodge of Christmas songs off key. And you know what’s better yet? Ayub’s whole family is Muslim. They don’t even celebrate the holiday. But Amina insisted. She couldn’t stand the idea that anyone would be hurting in the hospital on a holiday that meant so much to them. Anyways, it became a tradition. Every year, even when Ma was off, we would go to the hospital to carol.”

Simon is lost describing the memory and Wille couldn’t be more in love with him if he tried. Wille searches for words to encapsulate just how beautiful that memory is, eager to encourage and affirm him.

“Simon, baby, that is so beautiful. Like, really, really beautiful.”

Wille’s smile grows, excitement growing into giddiness as he grips both Simon’s shoulders,

“We have to go! Simon, we have to! How fun would that be?”

“You’d do that?”

Simon asks, but the answer is obvious as Wille gives him a single tsk before nodding his head eagerly.

“You know, hospitals aren’t particularly romantic, Wille.”

Wille playfully shoves Simon back,

“Oh, shut up! You know what is romantic? Being with the love of my life and bringing joy to others who are down on their luck. Isn’t that what the holiday is all about?”