Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

A voice crackled over the phone.

“I’m sorry to say, but your father has…”

A hand smacked the dining table.

“I am sick of hearing what those friends of yours have corrupted your mind with!”

Silence from the chatting app.

“Do you think they’re okay?”

“… I don’t know.”

A girl with light blue hair was packing her things. Her gaze was distant, cold, her hands ever so faintly trembling. Her roommate watched from the doorway, having already packed everything she needed.

“Kanade,” the observer spoke up. “We need to hurry.”

“I know.”

Kanade stared longingly at her computer, brushing her fingers over the keyboard, then the mouse. She murmured an apology that she couldn’t bring it with.

“Kanade…”

Someone knocked at the door downstairs, making Kanade flinch, and Mafuyu tense.

They looked at each other. They hadn’t heard of anyone coming over. The plan was for them to leave before Kanade’s housekeeper came over though, were they too late—?

“Kanadeee! I know you’re up there, you don’t leave the house anyway!”

Mizuki?

Mafuyu moved out of the doorway, downstairs instead to investigate their pink-haired friend coming along. Kanade continued to pack.

“You’re leaving?”

She turned to look at Ena. She must’ve been with Mizuki while said mutual friend stayed down with Mafuyu and overheard what the two were conserving about.

“Yes.” Kanade nodded.

Ena frowned. “You can’t.”

“I’m sorry, Ena.” Kanade turned away, zipping up her suitcase. “I need to go.”

She grabbed her wrist and tugged her close, but her hold was gentle, her other arm gently wrapped around Kanade’s shoulders and holding her close.

“You’ll never leave easy dressed like that…”

Kanade glanced down at herself. With a sigh, she nodded.

“Okay.”

Ena smiled. Kanade didn’t.

She couldn’t.

—

Disappearing is often the hardest thing for someone to do.

However, for those adept in disappearing, it was but a mere act. They could make it seem like a trick of the light.

—

“Nightcord at 25:00 disbanded.”

“Oh, really? That’s a shame, I liked listening to their songs…”

“Yeah, apparently something happened in the composer’s life that made the group go on a hiatus, then the lyricist had something going on too and the group couldn’t hold themselves together anymore.”

The conversation she overheard made her stomach drop.

Her head turned in the direction of the voices, some two kids talking in the corner of the class, and she strained to hear the rest of their conversation.

Glancing to the empty desk her friend sat at, Ichika winced.

Honami wasn’t here yet. She hadn’t gotten any texts that her friend would be absent, but was it possible she was wrong? Perhaps she had simply forgotten to check…

“Ichika-chan?”

She turned toward the voice and smiled at Kohane, albeit shakily.

“You’re friends with Ena-san, right?” Kohane asked, standing beside Ichika’s desk. She looked worried, but that was strange. There was nothing for Kohane to be worried about.

Nightcord disbanding…

“Yes.”

“Ah, good.” Kohane seemed a little more relieved, but still concerned, raising her phone in her hand to show Ichika text messages between Kohane and presumably Ena’s younger brother that she supposedly disliked. “Have you heard from her? It’s just that Shinonome-kun woke me up early in the night to text me about how Ena-san is missing…”

Ichika read over the texts, frowning now.

Shinonome Akito 01:25

> Kohane
> Kohane
> Answer your texts
> Kohane
> Azusawa Kohane
> Kohane

Azusawa Kohane 01:28

> It’s so late
> Are you okay?

Shinonome Akito 01:28

> Can you ask anyone about Ena at school tomorrow?
> She’s not home and she left a paper under my door apologizing
> I already asked Momoi-san and she said Ena wasn’t at her place
> I was going to ask about at Kamikou

Azusawa Kohane 01:30

> I’ll do what I can

Ichika’s frown darkened.

Then a new text came in, and Ichika read it.

Shinonome Akito 08:20

> No one’s seen Akiyama either
> They’re both missing

Kohane looked at it. She frowned too, texting back a response to Akito. At the same time, Ichika felt her phone vibrate too, so she pulled it out and glanced at it under her desk.

Hona:3 08:20

> I won’t be going to school today.

Sakisaki<3 08:20

> But Honaaaa-chan :(

Shii:) 08:20

> Did anything happen? Are you okay?

Hona:3 08:20

> I won’t be available for some time.
> I’ll try to be at band practice though.

Ichika frowned. One, Ena was missing, and Honami was now missing school?

Nightcord disbanding.

It had to be connected, somehow. How, she wasn’t sure, but…

—

She had been thinking about calling for a good while now. She was staring at her phone, looking at the contact.

She hadn’t gotten a text goodbye. She hadn’t gotten anything actually.

Ichika made a phone call. It was late, definitely after school, but enough time had passed for her to be absolutely certain the person she was calling would respond.

The number you dialed is not in use.

One more time.

The number you dialed is not in use.

Just one more.

The number you dialed is not in use.

Goddammit, Kanade-san.

Maybe the other one…

The number you dialed is not in use.

Of course, Asahina-senpai wouldn’t respond either.

—

Ichika wandered around some back alleys. It had been a few days since Nightcord’s disappearance. She wasn’t sure why she was there, but she was just walking around after all. She had been going through Main Street, but got a little lost on purpose while on the way, and just continued on without turning back.

The sound of a guitar riff caught her ear.

She turned toward the noise, coming from down an alley. She stared then carefully and quietly approached, peering behind a wall.

It was a band. A group of four wielding instruments just like Leo/need’s — the thought of a rival made Ichika’s heart start racing — but she continued looking, peering a little closer.

The band were all covered up, dressed in jackets and hiding their faces with hats or hoods, but two members still managed to stick out with their more expressive fashion than the other two. One of them played the guitar riff again, looking to the one on the keyboard.

“LOST, do you think we have everything down?” The guitarist spoke out.

No way.

“Yes, OWN.” The keyboardist looked to the guitarist, nodding, her ocean blue eyes catching the light, even if her hood was pulled over her eyes.

Oh my God.

“So we’re done here.” ‘OWN’ nodded, lowering their guitar, moving to put it back into its case.

‘LOST’ nodded, moving from her keyboard and beginning to put it up too, albeit with help from the bassist.

“Hahh, thank goodness!” The drummer slouched over. “My back hurtsss…”

“Oh, shush, you!” The bassist giggled, patting ‘LOST’s head before going over to the drummer and helping her help. “C’mon, now, Shinoshin!”

“You did not just call me that!”

“Well, you don’t have a nickname yet! I wasn’t going to call you by name.”

Ichika had her phone out. She didn’t even remember grabbing it, or hitting the record button, but there she was. Hiding behind a wall and a dumpster, recording who she was pretty sure were her missing friends.

“Yeah, well, you don’t have a nickname either.” ‘Shinoshin’ snapped. After a moment, she sighed, helping to put away their instruments.

“LOST, may we discuss?” ‘OWN’ asked, stepping off to the side.

Ichika stepped back. That was a little too close to her. Still, she watched as ‘LOST’ nodded and moved to standing by ‘OWN’s side, looking up at them.

“What is it?”

“Did all of that sound good to you?” ‘OWN’ asked, tilting their head.

‘LOST’ thought for a moment, before she nodded. “Yes,” she gave a soft smile, albeit forced. “I thought it sounded good.”

‘OWN’ nodded. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

Ichika shifted on one foot, trying to spread her weight to where she wouldn’t be hurting herself.

‘LOST’ looked over. Her ocean blue eyes scanned Ichika, looking directly at her. Whether or not anyone else noticed wasn’t Ichika’s problem.

Kanade looked so sad.

‘LOST’ looked back to the band. “Let’s pack up a little faster.”

Ichika turned tail and ran.

‘OWN’ glanced over. “What was that?”

‘LOST’ grabbed her hand and gently tugged. “Don’t worry about it. Let’s just get home.”

—

“Have you heard that new music group?”

“Hm? The one you told Ichika-chan about a little while ago?”

“Yeah. The one that seems targeted toward our songs. They covered Ikanaide a little while ago, and Ichika…”

Shiho didn’t continue. Honami only nodded. The two had been sitting quietly in peace on the rooftop of Sekai, admiring the stars together while they waited for Ichika and Saki to get there for band practice.

“Anyhow…” Shiho hesitated for a moment. “They’ve been covering the same songs we have. Even some of… Nightcord’s too.” They didn’t miss the way Honami winced.

Ever since Nightcord disbanded and all members’ subsequent disappearances, Honami had been downcast.

She just didn’t know why…

And Kanade…

“Icchaaaan! Wait!”

“Honami, Shiho!”

Ichika stormed in, panting, looking like she had run several marathons looking for them. They had been on the roof of Sekai after all, but seeing Ichika slam the door open with Saki soon afterward was a little strange.

“That group Shiho told us about — Honami!”

“Huh—?” Honami blinked. Ichika seemed so distressed.

“It’s Nightcord! I just watched them pack up after doing a song or something, they were—“ Ichika was stumbling over her words, with Saki desperately trying to calm her down. “I saw Kanade! and— and Asahina-senpai, and Ena! and the— the—“

“Icchan, stop, calm down.” Saki grabbed her and shook her, trying to pull Ichika from her almost dazed state.

Still, Ichika looked to Honami.

“I have a video.”

Honami stood from her seat beside Shiho and hurried over, Ichika showing her the video by practically shoving the phone into her face. It was definitely Kanade on the keyboard with Mafuyu on guitar, Ena drums, and Mizuki bass. Honami was crying before the video even ended.

She had tried so much. Even going as far as getting former Nightcord members’ numbers from other people, only to hear they were not in use, searching the Yoisaki residence over and over. She had cried over Kanade’s disappearance, Mafuyu’s too. She had no idea what happened to them, until now, now, when they were a band that was rivaling them, not just in skill surprisingly, but fame as well.

“We’re going to find them.”

Ichika promised with such a conviction it was like that night under the stars. Her hands were holding Honami’s now, the phone screen pressed against the back of the drummer’s hand.

Ichika looked a lot like Kanade.

“I promise you, Mochizuki Honami—“ has Ichika ever called her full name like that? “—I’m going to find them, we’re going to find them, and we’re going to see you smile again.”

Honami was smiling already, tears in her eyes.

—

Ichika and Honami walked home together that night.

“Do you still stop by her house sometimes?” She asked.

“Yes.” Honami nodded. “I still go there and clean.”

“How do you get in?”

“She allowed me a spare key. For emergencies, she said.”

“Oh.”

They walked together silently for a few moments, before Honami reached for Ichika’s sleeve and gently tugged.

“Ah, Ichika-chan…”

“Huh?”

The guitarist turned back, icy blue eyes locking with Honami’s, and she smiled. “What’s wrong?”

“Have you told… Shinonome-san? Ena-san’s younger brother.”

Ichika blinked. “Oh, I don’t… I don’t have his number.” She shook her head. “I texted Kohane though, so hopefully it gets to Shinonome-kun.”

Honami nodded.

They walked into someone.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” She blurted out, instantly catching whatever the someone had been holding. A bag of apple pies. It was heavy. A lot of apple pies. Her eyes locked with ocean blue.

“Yoisaki-san?”

Ichika perked up at that. “Kanade-san?”

“Ah…”

The girl froze. Her hair was cut short, now a wolf cut instead, but it was still identifiable who she was. Honami thought she looked pretty, and Ichika glanced away to avoid blushing.

Kanade cleared her throat. “Sorry for the inconvenience. I’ll get going.” She quickly took her bag of apple pies from Honami, pulling her hood more over her head and trying to get away.

Both of them reached out, grabbing onto her sleeve and tugging her back.

“Kanade-san—!”

Kanade tore away and tried moving.

“Yoisaki-san.”

Kanade froze, and they didn’t grab her this time. She had never heard that tone from Honami, and frankly, it terrified her. She sounded so stern, commanding, it fit her, loving, kind, caring Honami, willing to do whatever it took to help, to heal, to protect.


It pained her that she was wasting her precious time. Wasting time Honami could be spending on much more important things, like Ichika, Saki, Shiho, band practice, Leo/need, herself…

“I’m sorry, Mochizuki-san.”

Kanade whispered. She turned away and ran like her life depended on it.

Ichika prepared to go after but Honami simply grabbed onto her and pulled her back. When her friend looked back at her, she just shook her head, frowning to herself.

“No… I know Yoisaki-san.”

Honami said softly.

“She wants to be alone right now.”

Chapter Text

“Someone’s been watching our shows. The ones we do in the alley.” OWN’s gaze was cold as he watched Kanade play the piano. “Should we be concerned?”

Kanade glanced over, gently pressing their shoulder against OWN’s, before looking back to the keys, delicately playing them. OWN was sitting beside them at the grand piano, slouched over, while his hands were sat in his lap.

“No.” Kanade shook their head. “It’s okay.” She looked back up to OWN, tilting their head worriedly as she continued to play.

“Why? Are you worried they’ll do something?”

OWN shook his head with an emotionless huff, “I suppose. They’ve just been showing up and bothering me.”

“You don’t need to worry.” Kanade moved one hand to hold OWN’s. “Just rest easy.”

OWN hissed.

Kanade sighed. “Work with me, OWN… just take deep breaths and don’t worry about them.”

He kept his gaze on them, staring. Then, slowly, he nodded.

“I’ll make breakfast.” OWN stood and leaned down to kiss the back of Kanade’s hand. “I will be back.”

“I know you will.”

Kanade smiled.

Their gaze turned back to the piano, her hand slowing and just resting on the keys, not playing. Her gaze was calm yet almost apologetic. They stood from the piano and followed after OWN to the kitchen, staring at him, watching as he started preparing breakfast.

They had stayed up all night playing piano, and he just watched.

OWN caught their eye, and he smiled, but there
was nothing behind it, no warmth, no feeling, nothing. Just a smile.

Kanade couldn’t smile back.

—

“C’mon, it’s through here.”

“Icchan, are we really doing this?”

“Yes.”

“Okay…”

Ichika and Saki were going on their little adventure. Honami and Shiho were already waiting for them in Sekai, but Ichika had to go check this out first and called Saki to come accompany her. So Saki was anxiously following behind Ichika while they snuck through back alley and creepy streets.

“Ah, here.”

Ichika stopped, Saki hitting her shoulder with her nose, peeking over her shoulder to see.

There was… nothing there.

Ichika frowned.

Then she heard voices and pulled Saki behind her, the two ducking behind a dumpster. Saki glanced around nervously, but Ichika was holding her hand.

“Are you sure they’ll be here today, LOST?”

“Yes. She’s been here ever since she discovered us.”

They’re talking about me.

Ichika shared a glance with Saki, the two now suddenly nervous, and they stayed hidden behind the dumpster.

Footsteps came closer. Ichika shoved her free hand over Saki’s mouth, making eye contact with her as they tried to stay quiet. The footsteps got closer and closer, dangerously close to finding them.

Glancing over, Ichika found Kanade looking right at them.

Kanade’s gaze softened. Could she see how terrified Saki looked? How nervous Ichika was?

“… I don’t think she’s here.”

Kanade turned away and walked off, shrugging. “I thought she would… what a shame. I suppose she’s busy today though.”

They sat quietly.

“What.”

Saki whispered into Ichika’s hand, and she looked over at the blonde, shaking her head and trying to shush her.

Kanade and Mafuyu spoke quietly, too low for them to hear.

Saki gestured for them to go. Ichika shook her head.

I can’t, She mouthed. She couldn’t go, not when Kanade and Mafuyu seemed to just be waiting for them. But she let go of Saki’s hands, letting her go if she really felt uncomfortable. She wasn’t going to force her best friend to go.

Ichika stepped out from the alley.

Kanade and Mafuyu looked at her.

“I knew you’d come around.” Kanade smiled. “Hello Hoshino-san.”

“Kanade-san, Asahina-senpai.” Ichika bowed.

Mafuyu stared. Her gaze was cold, horribly uncharacteristic to the Asahina Mafuyu Ichika knew. It was cold, empty, almost hollow. It was disturbing. Ichika never knew Mafuyu could look that way.

Kanade looked the same.

“Why are we here, LOST?” Mafuyu turned to Kanade, gripping the guitar case strapped to her back tighter. “You knew she was here and lied to me?”

Ichika glanced anxiously between Kanade and Mafuyu.

“Don’t you understand? Hoshino-san has been watching us.” Kanade turned to Mafuyu. “Now, with Hoshino-san here, we can finally do what we have been waiting for.”

“OWN, if you will, your guitar.”

Mafuyu blinked then registered the command, putting down her guitar case and pulling out her guitar. Ichika watched with admiration as Mafuyu, a person she assumed had no former experience on the guitar except for this new band, played better than she did.

“What’s your band called?” Ichika asked, stepping closer to admire Mafuyu’s guitar work.

The two looked between each other.

“Um…”

“LOST.”

“OWN?”

“I thought you had a name.”

“Well, we came up with Nightcord together and…”

“More like Yuki came up with it.”

“OWN…!”

Ichika looked between Kanade and Mafuyu. So, their band didn’t have an official name yet, but Shiho had still heard of them covering their songs somehow? Perhaps they were at her live house.

Why would they, if they were trying to stay secret?

“Um, are you sure that one—?”

“Yes, LOST.”

“Okay.” Kanade nodded, giving Mafuyu a smile, before she turned back to Ichika. “Astral Wavelength.”

“Oh!” Ichika blinked. Did they just come up with that?

Mafuyu nudged Kanade.

“What’s wrong?”

Mafuyu whispered something. Kanade frowned.

“Are you sure?”

Mafuyu nodded, playing a simple tune on her guitar to fill the silence while no one was speaking. “If you trust Hoshino-san, why should I not?”

Ichika took the moment to glance at Saki. The blonde was still hiding behind the dumpster, looking at her worriedly.

Looking back, her upperclassmen were looking at her.

“Hoshino-san,” Kanade began with a gesture to Mafuyu, “please meet OWN.”

Ichika blinked. “Huh—?”

“OWN uses he/him pronouns.” Kanade continued, though she paused once she noticed Ichika looking very, very confused. She winced. “Um… Mafuyu has… been like this as long as I remember.”

“Kanade said we have DID.” OWN clarified, his cold, sharp voice cutting through the confusion so easily. “When we took a psychology test…”

Ichika was staring. She was so confused, but it made sense.

She had always suspected something to be off about Mafuyu on occasion, like she would see Mafuyu with a blank-faced, distant stare rarely but then a few minutes later, she would ask her if she was okay and a light would come into Mafuyu’s eyes and she would smile and…

Oh.

Ohhh. That’s what that was.

“I see.” Ichika nodded. “I understand, Asahina-senpai—“

“Don’t call me that.” OWN hissed.

Ichika squeaked meekly. “I-I mean, OWN-senpai.”

“… Better.” OWN mumbled.

Kanade informed Ichika of where they had been the past— god, how long? days? weeks? months? They don’t know, and Ichika doesn’t either. She just listened, missing the sound of Kanade’s voice, the way OWN would add his thoughts in a snappy manner that didn’t seem every Mafuyu-like but perfectly fit all the same.

So Nightcord disbanded. They were hesitant to tell the answer, so Ichika didn’t force them, not like she would’ve anyway. Then they went missing for at least two weeks, before they formed their band.

Astral Wavelength…

“It’s kind of like Leo/need.” Ichika laughed.

In the corner of her eye, she saw Saki wince and slump.

OWN scoffed. “Weren’t we here for something?” Impatiently, he played a short chord on his guitar, and Ichika felt something stabbing her. That’s what his music sounded like, like cold sounds meant to pierce the heart or sharp words of clawing for a feeling. Ichika shook away the thoughts.

“No, you’re right.” Ichika reached around to her own guitar case, letting Kanade take it and hold it for her while she opened it.

Her hands took her guitar into her hands and held it tightly. The weight of it was reassuring, it always was, her guitar.

Shiho always complimented her handiwork with her guitar.

…

Focus, Ichika.

Oh. Right. The guitar. Playing it. Right now. Right.

Against OWN…

OWN proposed a deal. “Me and Kanade play our song. You have to sing yours with just your guitar. If we don’t like it, we go, and you don’t see us again.”

Ichika hated that deal.

It terrified her. It almost felt like that one time she could’ve lost Shiho. Why is she thinking about Shiho so much recently — Ichika didn’t want to lose anyone again, didn’t want to lose Kanade, or OWN, Mafuyu, whoever they were, she didn’t want to lose anyone.

Her heart was pounding as she listened to Kanade and OWN play a guitar-keyboard duet. It terrified her, scared her.

Saki was looking at Ichika, like she had been this whole time, but her gaze changed now, concerned. She did have her keyboard with her…

The last of OWN’s guitar rung out. Ichika felt her stomach filling with dread, feeling sick, wanting to throw up. Her head was spinning, her grip faltering ever so slightly on her guitar, what was she going to do she couldn’t lose Kanade again and not Mafuyu either. What should she do?

What would Shiho think… What would Honami say?

Breathe, Ichika-chan, you need to breathe. Keep a clear head… you can do this. Just keep calm, you’ve sung this song before. It’s okay.

Just take it easy, Ichika. Just keep your cool, okay? Remember what you play for, what you sing for. You got a purpose, so sing for it.

Right.

Ichika’s hands steadied and she took a deep inhale, then exhale. She had to keep calm, not let her insecurities fool her, to keep fighting, to sing for it.

“Waaait!”

She opened her eyes.

“Tenma-san—?” Kanade flinched.

OWN showed no visible reaction, save for gripping his guitar tighter and stepping closer to Kanade protectively.

“Me and Icchan will duet too!” Saki insisted, quickly taking out her keyboard. “It’s not fair to put her in a two-on-one!”

Ichika stared at Saki, her heart racing for a different reason, and she bashfully ducked her head. “T-Thank you, Saki.”

The two conserved briefly on what song to play. Ichika felt much more at ease with Saki close, and as their shoulders pressed together, she felt her heart twist. She smiled, and the blonde brightly smiled back.

The two decided on a song.

It wouldn’t sound right without Honami and Shiho, but it was okay enough.

Only time alone, passes by, carrying me along.

The way home, it’s somewhat dark, but I guess I’m okay on my own

Street lamps, they shine on me, making a shadow.

I’m all alone…

When did Kanade start singing along? None of them knew, but OWN inclined his head to her and whispered the words under his breath, Saki was beaming, and Ichika was crying. Yet all four of them were singing together, somewhat.

A sob broke the song’s end.

Ah.

“Icchaaan, you cried during ikanaide again…”

The concern was immediate.

Ichika squeaked as Saki’s gentle hands cupped her cheeks and wiped away her tears. She could see that Kanade and OWN were watching from afar, still on their side of the alley. Saki was murmuring reassurances to her, and yet Ichika’s gaze was stuck on Kanade and OWN.

Kanade’s gaze was calm. OWN looked empty.

Were they proud? Were they going to leave her? Was she not good enough?

No. No.

“Hoshino-san—“

“You can’t leave!” Ichika cried. “Please! I-I won’t just let you go again, I’ll get better and I’ll sing for you again. Just give me one more chance, I’ll—“

Kanade’s fingers traced her cheek.

She had pushed past Saki without realizing it, the blonde hugging her from behind, standing over Kanade. Kanade’s hand moved, fingers running through her hair.

“Don’t cry, Hoshino-san.”

She smiled.

“You did good. Better than that, you did excellent.”

Ichika felt like she could die happy.

Chapter Text

“Sorry, you sung a song without us?”

Ichika paused in the middle of her story, looking to Shiho. The bassist seemed mildly annoyed that Ichika and Saki played a song without them and Honami.

She had been retelling the story of what happened between them and the guitarist and keyboardist of Astral Wavelength, Leo/need all sitting together . She was so excited that they were happy with the song she and Saki played them.

“You put emotion into it.” OWN had commented. “A lot of emotion.”

“Yes, I agree.” Kanade nodded.

She was smiling, tears in her eyes as well, but she wasn’t crying like Ichika was into her shoulder. Saki was still hugging Ichika, trying to soothe her best friend as much as she could.

“I felt that you wanted us to stay, to not leave you again.”

OWN nodded in agreement to Kanade’s attempt, huffing.

“And you made the joke that they were kind of like us?” Shiho crossed their arms, their emerald green eyes narrowing. “Jeez, it’s almost as if we’re a bad omen.”

Ichika winced. “Sorry…”

Shiho sighed. “I’m joking.”

“Oh.”

…

“Was that supposed to be funny?” Ichika retorted.

“Was it not?” Shiho smirked.

The group shared a small, sad laugh. They were all silent for a moment, before Honami quietly asked.

“Ichika-chan…” She hesitated, all of their eyes looking over to her. “Was Yoisaki-san…?”

Ichika nodded. “Kanade-san was okay.”

She purposefully neglected to tell them about Mafuyu’s mental health, it wasn’t her place to tell them after all. That was all Mafuyu’s business, and Yuki’s, and OWN’s. Not Ichika’s, and she understood that.

“Did she tell you why?”

“No.”

Honami frowned, but nodded slowly. She was worried, why wouldn’t she be? She was supposed to care for Kanade, to protect her, she trusted her to protect her and care for her even if she kept her at arms length and now she had vanished for at least a couple of months and showed up again under a different alias, a different band.

LOST

What did that mean…

Honami thought about it on the way home. She always went by the Yoisaki residence first, but of course, there was nothing there. Why would there be? Kanade wasn’t there anymore. For some reason, she found herself walking still. She should be going home.

Ena’s house had nothing, just her parents and—

“Mochizuki!”

Turning around after walking past, Honami looked at a familiar taller orange-haired male, stumbling over to stand next to her.

“Shinonome-san…?”

He grabbed onto her shoulder and tugged her close.

“Have you seen Ena? Please. Anything…?”

Honami hesitated.

Akito seemed to be crumbling, so desperate to get anything from his sister. His grip on her shoulder was so tight she found herself unable to struggle out, even though she wanted to really, really bad. She really only allowed touch from her bandmates (and Emu, she guessed). But Akito was desperate.

“Yes, Ichika-chan sent me this video a couple of days ago…”

Honami pulled out her phone.

—

Okay, just one more clue.

So Ena was apart of a band now with her former groupmates from Nightcord at 25:00, but she still hadn’t come home. It was like she refused to, so he had to find a spot they frequented.

”Um, Shinonome-san?”

He turned. “… Yes, Mochizuki?”

“Would you like to accompany me to the mall?”

He tensed. Scowled. Then decided it would be good for him. Sighing, he stood up, grabbing a hoodie and pulling it over his head.

—

“Mizuki, why are we doing this? I thought Kanade told us to lay low…”

“I thought we were using our nicknames!”

“I am not fucking calling you 𝒂𝒌𝒊𝒛𝒂𝒌𝒖𝒓𝒂 in public.”

Ena and Mizuki were arguing again. Mafuyu didn’t exactly know why or what for, but they were just listening to the two argue. They were shopping for something, what for, they didn’t know, just that Mizuki very happily dragged them out of the house, in the middle of a switch.

They couldn’t really care… OWN was getting cramped staying fronted for so long.

“Oh, we should buy this one.”

Clothing store.

Kanade said something about wanting a new jacket, didn’t she? A couple of days ago now…

Mafuyu moved deeper into the store, away from the quiet arguing of their partners.

They admired a couple of jackets for a moment until they looked over and spotted someone beside them, looking at the same jackets they were. They blinked, staring, and after a moment, Shiho turned to look at them too.

“… Hi… Asahina.”

Shiho nodded respectfully.

This was bad. Mafuyu couldn’t switch out without it taking too long for a response and Shiho being weirded out.

Keep it together.

“Hello Hinomori.”

If Shiho seemed disturbed by how bland they sounded, they didn’t show, which Mafuyu was grateful for. Or were they? They didn’t know.

Shiho stared for a moment.

“… You, uh, you look good with your hair cut like that.”

Mafuyu blinked, tilting their head curiously. Shiho looked away and back to the jackets, though they noticeably pulled their hood over their head to hide their face.

Mafuyu just shrugged.

“Mafuyu! There you went!”

Turning, they faced Mizuki, grinning. “We were just about to pay, was there anything you wanted?”

Mafuyu’s taller frame blocked Shiho from Mizuki’s gaze, they knew, so they didn’t move.

Instead, they blurted out. “Isn’t it so strange that all three of us use they/them pronouns?”

Oh.

“Huh—?” Mizuki visibly blanked.

“Asahina—“ Shiho hissed from behind them.

Mafuyu turned back to the jackets and grabbed one, admiring it closely. It was a lot like one of the jackets Kanade had previously had back at home. They had the plan to go back and get them, but decided against it because it would be suspicious.

“I want this one. For Kanade.”

Mizuki smiled softly. “Alright, we’ll get it…”

“What did you mean by three though?”

“Oh don’t worry about it.”

Leaving Shiho alone, confused, they sighed, shaking their head.

“Why can’t Ichika just come with me to grab jackets for her…” They grumbled under their breath, pulling out their phone and sending a text to the Leo/need group chat.

Shiho 19:27

> I think AW is here, except for Kanade. Honami, you’d probably want to see them I’d imagine.

Honami 19:28

> On my way
> With someone else too

Shiho 19:28

> Be quick though, they’re about to leave.

Saki 19:29

> IS MIZUKI-CHAN THERW
> AHIHO PPLEWSE

Shiho 19:31

> Is Mizuki the pink one?
> If yes, then yeah they’re here

Saki 19:31

> HONA IM ON THE WAY TOO

Shiho 19:35

> Also Ichika, I don’t know what kind of jacket you’re looking for when you just say “oh can you grab me a jacket after work”

Anyway, not Shiho’s problem. Not anymore.

“MIZUKIIII-CHAAAAN!!”

Three heads looked over to see blonde slamming into pink, Mizuk suddenly stumbling back from a force tackling them.

“Mizuki!!! Where have you been?!” Saki grabbed their shoulders and shook them. “I’ve missed you!! Mizuki-chan!!!!”

“Saki-chan!” Mizuki perked up instantly, picking up Saki and spinning around, albeit stumbling back. The two burst into boisterous laughter, hugging tightly.

Mafuyu stared at them for a moment.

Ena stood beside them, her hand subconsciously holding their sleeve.

And hands were on their cheeks, turning their head back and forth, and Mafuyu hummed, gritting their teeth as their eyes locked with beautiful blues.

“Asahina-senpai…”

“Mochizuki-san?”

Honami leaned down the inch between them, pressing their foreheads together, her hands still cupping Mafuyu’s cheeks.

“Please, allow me this selfishness.”

She whispered, just basking in the presence of them.

For a moment, the world faded away. It was just the two of them, quiet, in each other’s presence, silently loving.

Mafuyu felt warm.

“Where have you been?”

Hands squeezed her shoulders. Ena stared blank-faced at her younger brother, who was slumped over, his hair unkempt and slightly longer as if he hadn’t bothered to cut it anymore. His entire appearance just looked ruffled up, his outfit looked haphazardly put together.

Actually, Akito looked like he had just rolled out of bed and dragged himself out of the house.

“I’ve, um—“

Ena bit her tongue. How was she supposed to tell him she ran away with her bandmates because Kanade and Mafuyu were leaving first and Ena and Mizuki didn’t want to be alone without them?

“I was just with my friends.” She reached up to try and pry Akito’s hands off her, but he squeezed tighter, pulling her closer.

She looked up.

Akito was scowling. Scowling and struggling to hold back tears.

She blinked.

“That’s bullshit.” Akito hissed out between gritted teeth. “I was so worried about you, dimwit. And all of a sudden, Mochizuki decides ‘oh I’m gonna pass by the Shinonomes to see if they’ve heard anything from Ena’ and she’s the one that tells me you’re still alive! Shows me genuine proof! Not you, like it should have been!”

Ena stared. “Aki— Akito, shush!”

“I thought you fucking killed yourself, Ena.” Akito’s voice lowered. His arms moved, tightly wrapping around his older sister and tugging her closer.

A moment passed. Ena hugged her younger brother, holding him close and raising her hand to comb through Akito’s hair.

“I’m here…”

“… Hey, Mizuki-chan?”

“Hmmm?” A hum came past an obnoxiously loud sip of soda. “What’s up?”

“… I think we were too, um, normal.”

Mizuki peeked over, looking up from their phone. They hadn’t even noticed that Mafuyu was having a moment with Honami (“Score!” They cheered, making Saki look at them confused. “Sorry, I’ve been waiting for some kind of like confession thing between them, now I just have to get Kanade…”) and Ena with Akito.

“… Oh.”

Mizuki blinked slowly, still staring.

Mafuyu looked calm. Ena looked relieved.

“… I think we should go home.” Mizuki called. “Mafuyu? Enaemon?”

“If you call me a variation of my old nickname again—“ Ena hissed.

“Mizuki is right. Kanade’s been home alone for too long.”

Mafuyu stared at Honami. The drummer smiled, gently kissing their forehead, murmuring a it’s okay against their skin. Mafuyu nodded before pulling away.

In the background, Ena and Akito parted, both halfheartedly scowling, before crossing their arms and looking away from each other.

—

“We’re baaaackkk~!”

Mizuki chirped, swinging the front door open.

Staring into their apartment, there was Yoisaki Kanade and Hoshino Ichika sharing a cup of tea.

The two troubled girls looked at them.

“Welcome home.” Kanade smiled.

Ichika blanked then stammered, standing quickly and hurriedly gathering her things. “O-Oh, um, I can go—“

“Hoshino-san.”

“… Yes, Kanade-san?”

“You haven’t finished your tea. Please stay.”

Ichika sat back down. In the meantime, Ena and Mizuki retired to their rooms. Mafuyu came closer and sat next to Kanade, setting a plastic bag next to their partner.

“We were just discussing you.” Kanade murmured, staring into her tea.

Ichika was silent for a moment, staring at Mafuyu. When the purple-haired girl raised a brow, Ichika tensed.

“Just…” Leo/need’s guitarist hesitated. “Um. Kanade…?”

Kanade glanced to Mafuyu with a smile. “Hello Mafuyu.”

“Hello Kanade.” Mafuyu nodded.

Ichika nodded too, slowly. She looked at the way the two across from her looked at each other so fondly, and wondered, strangely, if they would ever look at her like that.

“… It was your birthday a couple of days ago.”

Kanade looked back to Ichika as she spoke.

“Honami went and got a cake anyway and we celebrated amongst ourselves… She was so insistent on saving a slice in case you ever came back.” Ichika reached down into her bag and pulled out a small box.

Kanade stared.

Mafuyu knew Kanade was blanking. Quietly, they reached forward and grabbed the box for her, opening it up. In front of them was, indeed, a slice of cake.

“… The only reason you caught us was because Kanade was feeling cramped in our apartment.”

Mafuyu shrugged. “So we went out to practice instead that day.”

If Ichika hadn’t so particularly been walking around that day, she wouldn’t have seen them. If she hadn’t come back and kept visiting that spot for days, weeks, almost two months, if she hadn’t kept holding out hope, she wouldn’t have met them again, there, waiting for her.

“Then you came back to that spot.” She whispered.

Mafuyu nodded. Kanade laughed softly. “Only because you did. You didn’t stop hoping we would return there.”

“It was your only lead on us after all.” Mafuyu added.

Ichika stared.

She took a slow sip of her tea. “Mhm.”

She would never stop hoping.

Chapter Text

A lone girl stood alone.

In her hands was a bouquet of carnations. Her gaze was downcast toward two graves before her. Kneeling down, she lowered the carnations to the ground, resting them between the headstones. She stared, quiet, unmoving, simply just staring.

It was raining.

There was a shadow cast over her. Glancing up, a large white wing met her eyes, looking over, she herself looked back, adorning that pale dress, white hair and eyes, large bony scythe wielded in one hand.

“Hello Kanade.”

Her own voice came from the figure.

Kanade stared. After a moment, she nodded. She didn’t trust herself to speak, not quite yet, so she was content to listen for now.

This version of her had appeared one day. No one else seemed to see it but her, and Kanade wasn’t sure why. Perhaps she was going crazy, mental, and should be locked away, should disappear alone this time.

“You mourn once more.” The reaper murmured.

“Mhm.” She hummed.

“Thirteen years. One month. One day.” It continued. “That’s how far apart their deaths were.”

Kanade nodded again, staring down at their graves.

One had died when she was 5, horrible illness that took her away, and she didn’t know much beyond that. The other died in the hospital, his body having given up on him after trying so hard to mend his broken brain, sometime when she was 18.

Kanade swallowed the tears, the bile threatening to spill between her lips.

She wouldn’t desecrate them more than she had already by being born.

“Have a good night, Mom, Dad.”

She turned away and walked off through the rain. Somewhere, in the corner of her eye, the reaper followed her, haunting presence following ever so closely.

—

Kanade came home and returned to her apartment.

It didn’t seem like Ena or Mizuki were home. She thought that Mafuyu would have been, but she couldn’t find them.

So, she was alone.

She sat down at the dining table.

“Why are we here?”

It asked.

She frowned. “I don’t… know.”

She felt hungry. Her stomach really hurt. Hah. She was alone again, just like always, alone, alone, forever. Forever alone…

“… I miss Mom. A-And Dad.”

God, it was all her fault.

Kanade breathed out a shaky sob, shoving her face into her hands. She didn’t cry, she didn’t deserve to. Everything that happened, it was her fault, and she deserved this.

“Thirteen years. One month. One day.”

The reaper repeated.

“You still mourn, grieve. Isn’t it your fault? You have no right to grieve that which you killed.”

“Yes,” she cried. “It’s always been my fault, it’s mine. I should have done something more, I should have done more… I’m so useless.”

It stared at her, sitting across from her. Its form shifted, and what stared at her now, was a child with silver hair and big blue eyes, smiling.

“It’s always been your fault.”

A second moment passed, and her junior high self stared at her.

“Why can’t you just disappear?”

Kanade shoved away from the dining table and made a mad dash to her room, swinging the door open harshly and slamming it closed behind her. Without her permission, the urge overpowering her, and hot tears were streaming down her cheeks, weak, broken sobs leaving her lips.


she was pathetic.

God, she was so selfish. To think she could save  someone; foolish, stupid, selfish Yoisaki Kanade who cared about no one but herself, making her feel better about herself.

She scrambled for her bed and desperately crawled into it, curling up under the covers.

The reaper loomed for a moment.

The silence came, no longer filled by the haunting music that plagued her mind, what she added that day, the song, the tone she played that day. Her music was a curse, a blessing and gift, a reminder that she was a plague upon this world.

She should disappear.

…

Her phone was ringing.

Pulling herself from the covers, Kanade fished out her phone, staring at the screen. She swallowed her tears and swiped, putting the phone up to her ear.

“H-Hello? Mochizuki-san…?”

“Hi, I’m sorry. I just wanted to check in. Are you okay? Mafuyu-senpai gave me your new phone number a couple of days ago when I asked…”

Kanade almost cried in relief from the voice on the other side of the phone.

It was so good to hear her…

“I’m… okay.”

She hesitated. How convenient was it that Honami called when she was the midst of a breakdown?

“Why did you…?”

“I just had a feeling.” Honami said, clearly worried, but quietly. “Are you sure you’re okay? You sound like…”

“I’m fine.” Kanade murmured, sternly.

There was quiet for a moment, and Kanade could faintly hear the sound of… a guitar, and a keyboard, and bass…

“Are you at practice?”

“Yes. But I suddenly got a bad feeling and called you…”

Kanade hesitated. She shouldn’t be selfish anymore.

But just this once…

“Can you stay on the phone? And… and can I…?”

Honami gigged through the phone. Kanade’s heart fluttered.

After a moment, Honami turned on her camera, waving to it, before she set it up on some chair or table then backed up to her drum kit.

Ichika waved to the camera too, followed by Saki jumping up and down, trying to be seen over the guitarist, waving excitedly with both of her arms.

“Honami?”

Shiho sighed. They gave a barely noticeable wave as well, but it was more like a nod of their head.

“Ah, right.” Honami nodded. “1, 2, 3, 4!”

Kanade fell asleep to the sound of a song, the authentic instruments she had fallen in love with, only because of Leo/need.

… the acoustic guitar didn’t count. That was too special. That belonged to her…

She was asleep.

—

Mochizuki Honami
Ongoing call: 04:39:21

Kanade woke up to that on her screen.

She blinked. She could hear faint noises in the background, muffled talking. She sat up and rubbed at her eyes sleepily, yawning. It was… narrowing her eyes… 11pm.

She heard a door open, then close.

“… Mochizuki…?”

She found herself murmuring softly, quietly.

“Oh!”

Kanade found her heart fluttering once more.

“I’m here.” Honami’s voice quickly came closer. “I’m here, Yoisaki-san… did you just wake up?”

“Mhm.”

“I’m here.”

That’s everything Kanade could want and more.

“You were talking in your sleep.” Honami said quietly, sounding as if she were frowning with worry, always so concerned. “You were… saying things about ‘disappearing’ and how it was… ‘your fault’.”

Honami wouldn’t have had it confirmed, but she could guess.

So Kanade didn’t say anything.

“I heard you mention your mom and dad a couple of times.” The drummer continued. There was a slight rustle to her words, like she was sorting through papers.

“… I’m sorry, Kanade.” Honami admitted.

Kanade flinched. No. No. Honami shouldn’t have to feel bad, it was all her fault, she shouldn’t have to apologize for her, oh Honami—

“I should have done more for you.”

Kanade felt sick.

“I-I need to—“

“No, you don’t.” Honami said softly, but firmly. “You’re trying to run away, but I… I won’t let you.”

“I’ll come and find you, I promise you.”

Kanade wanted to cry again, to run away, to hide until she died, to disappear forever, to not be mourned, she didn’t deserve it.

“Kanade…”

She squeaked in response. It was all she could give. Honami was calling her by given name…

“I will never stop caring for you. It is not just my job as your housekeeper, but as your friend, Kanade. Nothing would never stop me from caring for you, whether you want me to or not. I will love you, I will care for you, I will cherish you.”

What the fuck.

Kanade was crying, softly, but she was trying not to. She didn’t deserve this. Honami was so nice and for what…

“It’s okay to cry, Kanade. I’m here.”

Honami reassured softly.

“You’ll never be alone again.”

Chapter Text

Where Kanade awoke again, she was still on the phone with Honami. She could tell, she could hear breathing, though wincing as she realized her phone was almost dead. She hurried to plug it in, and she realized something else.

Mochizuki Honami +3
Ongoing call: 10:20:05

Three other people were in the call. (Three others Kanade was troubling, inconveniencing.) But who? It couldn’t be Night— er, Astral Wavelength. 

From one of them, she could hear bass.

Oh…

“… Hinomori…?”

The bassist only grunted. “It’s, like, 5 in the morning. Go back to bed.”

Kanade listened to the sound of their bass for a moment.

“Why aren’t you asleep?”

“Can’t.”

Shiho didn’t continue, so Kanade didn’t pry. The sound of the bass filled the call, and Kanade just stared up at the ceiling as she listened. She flinched as something shifted in bed beside her and turned, purple fading to baby blues looking at her.

She smiled at Mafuyu.

Mafuyu nodded, but moved closer, wrapping their arms around Kanade, and she snuggled closer to them, burying her face into their shoulder.

A beat.

The bass still played, all the way until morning.

—

Ichika yawned as she stepped into the bathroom. She took a shower, brushed her teeth, combed her hair to as neat as it would go. She checked her phone, the call was still going, but the bass was still playing and there was not the distinctive noise of Shiho snoring accompanying soft breathing from Saki and Honami.


And Kanade now, she guessed. The thought made her chest felt warm.

Kanade was back. Home, and she wasn’t going to leave again.

…

The bass was playing.

Ichika sighed. She always muted herself while she slept on call with her best friends, though the others tended to stay unmuted, allowing every noise to be heard, and she liked it because the sound of their breathing was reassuring.

She put on her casual outfit and headed out, her phone in her pocket, still muted.

She knew the directions like the back of her hand. She heard the bass playing from inside when she walked up to the window, giving a slight, strained smile, before she knocked on the glass.

A pause.

The window opened after a moment, and Ichika was met with a messy, grey bed head and tired emerald green eyes.

“You stayed up all night.” She remarked.

Shiho huffed. “So?”

Ichika glanced back into Shiho’s room. On the bed, she could see Shiho’s phone on the pillow, charging, the phone call still ongoing. Faintly, she could hear a murmur from the phone, though she couldn’t tell who it was.

“I’m coming in.”

“Hey—“

“Excuse me—“

“No, you can’t come in— Ichika!”

A crash rung out as Ichika toppled over Shiho, the two landing on the floor in a heap of clothes and each other. Shiho had their bass raised and out of danger, thankfully unharmed by the tumble.

They sighed and awkwardly pat Ichika’s head with their free hand.

“Get off..”

The two moved to sit on Shiho’s bed, quietly talking. Shiho’s window was still open, and they were playing their bass still, Ichika leaning on their back while they did.

“Ichika,” the sound of Shiho’s voice jolted her awake. She hadn’t realized she was falling asleep on them.

“Sorry.” She mumbled.

“… Do you hear that?” The string vibrated.

Ichika glanced back. She glanced to Shiho’s phone, which was making a strange amount of noise, sounding like wind, panting. Running.

“… We are not meeting up at my house.” Shiho sighed, just as Ichika saw blonde in the corner of the window followed by a head of light brown hair and blue eyes.

She giggled.

“I think it’s too late for that.”

Shiho groaned as Saki picked something up off the ground and excitedly showed them Shibao.

—

Kanade woke up alone.

Not exactly, though. A small dog was curled up on the bed next to her, against her chest. Her phone was on the nightstand, still charging, the phone call still on.

Mochizuki Honami
Ongoing call: 12:00:58

Just Honami.

There was a lot of noise in the apartment. A strange amount. Sitting up, the dog still beside her, she looked to the door, cracked open.

She looked down.

“… Shibao?”

How did the word did Mochizuki Honami’s dog get into her room?

the noise.

The dog hopped into her arms and Kanade carried him as she walked out of her room to peer outside. There were Shiho and Ichika playing Uno with Ena and Mizuki at the dining table, meanwhile it sounded like Honami and Saki were with Mafuyu in the kitchen.

Shibao barked excitedly as Honami passed by the doorway and everyone looked over.

“Hi Kanade!!” Mizuki chirped, waving. “If you’re looking for Mafuyu, they’re in the kitchen.”

Mafuyu was fronting? Around all these people?

Usually it was Yuki… unless Leo/need had come by unexpectedly and Mafuyu wasn’t able to switch out.

“Mizuki put down a FUCKING CARD—“

“Stop yelling at me, alright that’s what you get—“

“DO NOT PLUS FOUR ME, AKIYAMA MIZUKI— MIZUKI!”

Shiho and Ichika exchanged a confused glance as Ena and Mizuki began to yell and shout at each other. Wincing from the loudness, Kanade fled to the kitchen, Shibao still in her arms.

“Hi Operation Crossroad, Baker Test.” Mafuyu murmured as they passed by, petting Shibao.

They and Saki were helping Honami with making breakfast. Or rather, a late breakfast, since it was almost lunchtime.

“Don’t after nuclear bomb testing— Hi baby.” Honami cooed, gently kissing Shibao on the head.

Kanade stood there awkwardly, just watching the three.

“Drink some water, Kanade-chan!”

“Ah, but Shibao—“

“Just put him down, it’s okay—“

“I don’t want to…”

Saki and Honami stared at her.

Kanade was hugging Shibao tightly. She really didn’t want to put them down and she was really comfortable just holding him. The Shiba Inu seemed comfortable too, snuggled up all in her arms and licking her cheek.

Honami sighed. “Okay… but don’t forget to hydrate, okay?”

“Mhm.”

Kanade nodded.

Quietly, she sat down on the floor and put Shibao in her lap. The small dog curled up against her, content as ever, and she continued to pet him, focusing on the feel of his fur to avoid getting overwhelmed by all the movement and noise.

After a couple of minutes, Mafuyu sat down next to her.

“Are you okay?” They whispered, leaning their head against hers, wrapping their arm around her shoulder.

“Overstimulated.” She mumbled.

“Bed?”

Kanade shook her head. She didn’t want to go back. But there was so much noise and movement, she didn’t have her headphones either, there was no music.

Mafuyu seemed to have the same idea.

“Come on,” Mafuyu gently helped her to stand.

“But Shibao…” Kanade whined.

Mafuyu sighed.

They could hear Honami giggling from somewhere in the kitchen. Kanade had just met her dog and already she was emotionally attached to him.

“What if he doesn’t like the piano?”

“Mochizuki-san plays drums. How can the piano be worse?”

“Maybe she has soundproofing or…”

“Get up.”

Begrudgingly, Kanade stood (with Mafuyu’s help) and she followed them as they guided her to the extra room. It wasn’t a guest room, but instead a room they used for their own interests. In one corner was the piano Kanade always played, with the drums Ena played a couple of feet beside it. In the opposite corner, were Ena’s easels. On the wall, were two guitar cases, holding electric and bass guitars respectively.

Mafuyu closed the door behind them, noticing a small fluffy four-legged creature following by Kanade’s feet.

Kanade sat at the grand piano and Shibao jumped up to sit on her lap. Beside her, Mafuyu sat on the bench, watching as her gentle, delicate hands began to play the keys.

“See? I told you he wouldn’t mind.” Mafuyu mumbled, earning a soft laugh from Kanade.

“No…” She murmured. “You said ‘how could the piano be worse?’”

“Same thing.”

“No, it’s not.”

Shibao barked.

“Shh, boy.” Kanade moved one hand from the piano to pet Shibao. “It’s okay, honey.”

The dog quickly quieted down, curling up in Kanade’s lap once more.

“Where’s Kanade-chan?” Saki asked, looking to the spot where Kanade had once been.

“Breakfast is almost done, so…”

Honami glanced around and frowned. She stepped out into the dining room and glanced around. Ena was grumbling to herself, Mizuki giggling every time they put down a card, Shiho’s eyes were narrowed and silent, Ichika having scooted closer to Shiho subtly every time someone put a card down.

“When did you get so close to me?” Shiho looked over and frowned.

Ichika stared. “Don’t worry about it.”

Honami knocked on the table, all four participants of the Uno game quieting instantly.

“Shibao?” She called out.

“Oh,” Ena looked over. “They’re probably in the music room. It’s soundproof, so they can’t hear you, I’m pretty sure.”

Honami nodded slightly.

She walked over and opened the door, peeking inside. Instantly, Shibao came over and jumped up, nuzzling into her hand as she pet him.

“Hi baby.”

“Ah, Mochizuki-san—“

“Hi Mochizuki-san.”

Kanade and Mafuyu stared at her from the grand piano. Honami had always known about the two’s shared infatuation of the piano, and music in a general sense.

“Am I interrupting something?”

“Not at all.” Kanade shook her head. “Play with us?”

Mafuyu stood and went over to their guitar case, pulling their electric guitar from it and plugging it in. Honami smiled and took her place at the drums.

It felt strange, using someone else’s drum set.

“You look aggravated.” Ichika mumbled.

Shiho placed down their last card, eyes narrowed, but smirking.

“FUCK YOUR NONBINARY ASS, OH MY GOD!” Ena threw down her cards in a fit of rage, Mizuki bursting into laughter beside her.

“Ena— Ena, that’s not fair, I’m nonbinary—“

“YOU GAVE ME A MILLION PLUS FOURS!” 

“Shiho?”

Ichika’s hand found Shiho’s. The bassist had been quiet for a long time now, focused not on the game, but something else.

“I think they’re stealing our drummer.”

A dramatic gasp came from behind them, making them both flinch.

“But Hona-chan is ours!”

Ena and Mizuki looked at them.

“Mm…” Mizuki hummed. “Are you four in a polyamorous relationship?”

“A what?”

“Huh—?”

“No. Absolutely not.”

Ichika and Saki looked at Shiho.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Shiho sighed, crossing their arms.

“Does this mean Shiho-chan doesn’t love us?” Saki whined, grabbing onto Shiho’s shoulders and hugging them from behind, making the bassist grimace.

“No, that’s not— whatever. Get off me.”

“Icchan, they don’t love us anymore…”

Ichika laughed, gently pulling Saki from Shiho and pulling her in for a hug. “There, there, we still have Honami…”

“But it looked like Honami kissed Mafuyu a couple days ago! Remember when we were at the mall and…”

Shiho slammed their hands on the table loudly.

“HONAMI WHAT?!”

—

Leo/need was walking home. It was quiet, but they were clinging to each other, Honami walking Shibao with his leash.

She looked over at her bandmates who seemed less than happy. She was worried. Well, Saki seemed tense, Ichika was glancing at Shiho worriedly, and said bassist looked as if they were going to combust.

Before she could ask, Shiho turned toward her and grabbed her, tugging her down to their level. They were scowling, and she blinked, quickly trying to recount through the day to figure out if she did anything wrong. Shibao looked over confused, but nuzzled against Shiho’s leg.

“Are you cheating on us?”

What

“E-Excuse me?”

Shiho huffed. “Saki told me you kissed Asahina when the two of you met with Astral Wavelength at the mall that day.”

Honami looked to Saki, frowned, then looked back to Shiho, gently pulling their hand off her collar.

“One, Shiho-chan…” She murmured. “We’re not in a relationship.”

Shiho flushed but grumbled an agreement, nodding slightly. They crossed their arms and stood beside Ichika and Saki, squished between the two.

“Two, Asahina-senpai and I didn’t kiss.” Honami giggled, though she couldn’t help but blush at the thought. “We just… put our foreheads together.”

“So you fed me false info!”

Shiho turned to Saki, pointing a finger.

“Haha! But you were jealous!”

“No, I wasn’t!”

Chapter Text

It was pouring rain when Honami got a call. She had been having band practice with Leo/need, but quietly excused herself as she felt a bad feeling and left the practice room for a brief moment. As soon as she did, her phone rang.

“Hello? This is Mochizuki Honami speaking…”

“Hi.”

A despondent voice mumbled over the phone, and Honami felt her heart break all over again.

“I’m here.” She said quickly. “Do I need to come over?”

“… Maybe.”

“I’m coming. I’ll even bring Shibao.”

“Thank you.”

—

Walking through the rain under an umbrella with a Shiba Inu on the leash wasn’t too difficult. Thankfully, Shibao was trained so he didn’t stray from Honami’s side.

Arriving at the apartment, she climbed the steps and went to the door.

Before she could even knock, it opened. She blinked, staring at Kanade as she hugged her tightly. She could see Mafuyu standing behind her in the darkness of the apartment. She dropped Shibao’s leash and the dog barked a goodbye before he walked into the apartment.

Honami gently held Kanade. It looked strangely dark, and she frowned, giving Mafuyu a glance.

“The power went out.” Mafuyu mumbled, sleepily lumbering over before they reached out and wrapped their arms around Honami’s and Kanade’s waists, pulling them both closer.

“Stay?”

Honami laughed softly at the request, looking at Mafuyu with a warm smile.

“Do you ever have to ask?”

—

Honami spent the day with Kanade and Mafuyu Strangely, it was just the three of them and Shibao. She hadn’t seen a sign of Ena or Mizuki the whole time, but she supposed it wasn’t too odd.

Kanade was strangely more clingy than usual and Mafuyu seemed to have more of that blank stare they did before.

Shibao was curled up against her. Honami watched as Kanade played the piano and Mafuyu the guitar. For some strange reason, she felt foggy.

Shibao gently nudged at her hand and she looked down at him, gently petting his head.

“What’s the matter, baby?” She murmured, noticing the poor dog looked nervous, scared maybe. That was strange.

Sure, it was storming outside, but Shibao was used to thunder and lightning. At least, Honami was pretty sure he was. He strangely looked so scared.

She pulled her hand away and looked to Kanade and Mafuyu.

A blood-soaked Kanade stared back.

—

She woke up to someone gently shaking her shoulder.

Honami opened her eyes blearily. Someone was trying to talk to her, a blob of yellow in her vision, and she frowned as her vision focused. Oh right, Leo/need took a cab home…

Saki was shaking her, looking worried. Ichika was in the passenger seat, but she was looking at them, and mainly at Shiho, who was murmuring into the phone. Into Honami’s phone.

Shiho caught Honami’s eye.

Yoisaki, she mouthed.

Honami grabbed her bag and unlocked the car door, shoving it open and jumping out onto the sidewalk. Immediately, the cab burst into yells, but she slammed the door shut before she could hear them. She glanced around quickly, taking note of where they were, of the pouring rain, and she bolted off in a direction.

She had to hurry. That’s what that dream was.

“Listen, Yoisaki, I need you to stay with me now.” Shiho said softly, over the noise of Ichika desperately trying to get the taxi driver to turn around and start going to Astral Wavelength’s apartment building.

“Mmnnh…”

A despondent groan came from the other side of the phone.

Shiho gripped Honami’s phone tighter, holding it closer to their ear. Saki was clinging worriedly onto their arm as they tried to focus. Their voice felt strained, partially stuck in their throat and full of concern they didn’t know they could out into their tone.

“Just take deep breaths for me. Honami’s gonna be there soon, okay? Leo/need’s gonna be there too. We’ll be there.” They said softly. “Is anyone else home?”

“No… just me.”

They nodded slightly. “That’s okay. Can you breathe for me, Yoisaki? Just think about some songs, okay?”

Kanade whined, but they could hear her soft breathing. “It hurts so bad.”

Shiho winced.

“Yeah, I know, but it’s gonna be okay. Do you have a first aid kit nearby? Keep breathing.”

“Um… the first aid is in the bathroom. I dunno if I can…”

“You don’t have to do anything.” Shiho quickly reassured. “Just keep breathing for me. You’re gonna be okay. You’re doing great.”

They pulled the phone from their ear. “Ichika, pay for our cab.”

“But—“

Shiho crawled over Saki, grabbing their guitar case and throwing open the door Honami had just jumped out of. Saki yelled after them as they hopped out too, running off in the direction Honami had. Based off the shoes smacking wet concrete behind them, Ichika and Saki had followed.

Kanade was still breathing into their ear. “You’re doing great, Yoisaki.”

They hesitated.

“Hey, hey Yoisaki.” They called, gaining a weak hum in response. “Can you temporarily wrap it until Honami gets there?”

“Um… no.”

Shiho cursed quietly.

“That’s okay. Just stay on the phone with me now.”

“Mhm…”

Ichika had gone ahead, leading the way now. She was the only one of the three of them that actually knew where Astral Wavelength’s apartment was.

Shiho nearly felt sick as the call suddenly ended.

—

Her fingers gently traced a fragile hand.

“I’m here, honey.” She murmured, letting the delicate body curl up against her as much as she could in their current positions. One hand held hers, the other holding a clean rag to wipe away blood from her weak forearms.

Honami never asked.

Gently, she kissed Kanade’s forehead, and the girl whined, free hand weakly grabbing at her shoulder.

“I’m here.” Honami repeated for the umpteenth time and she would every time. “Let me help.”

“Fine.”

Kanade whispered.

Honami smiled.

After kicking the front door open and stumbling upon the scene, Honami had taken Kanade to the bathroom.

While she normally allowed Kanade to bathe on her own, she wasn’t in a state to be left alone, so she asked for permission to accompany her and got a discouraged nod in response. It was just a friendly thing between the two of them, sometimes on rare occasion back at the Yoisaki residence, Honami would have to help Kanade bathe if she wasn’t in condition to do so on her own.

Honami was just there to help.

She never touched Kanade, letting the reddened rag soak in soapy water, as her hands moved to scrub shampoo into her hair. She didn’t look either, she was here to care for Kanade, and that was all she would do, care for her and love her.

“I love you.”

Honami murmured.

“Mhm.”

Kanade hummed.

She seemed sleepy, barely conscious, but Honami had to keep waking her up, not wanting her to sleep until she could properly treat her wounds. She continued to gently brush her soapy hands through Kanade’s white hair, being gentle not to get it into her eyes, being gentle to show she loved her.

Again, she kissed Kanade’s forehead.

“Love you too…”

Kanade mumbled, cracking open her eyes. She looked down at her wrists and frowned, expression darkening for a moment. For a moment, she was guilty. She had bothered Honami again, burdened her with her feelings and problems once more.

Honami could grow up to be so much more if Kanade wasn’t disrupting her all the time.

“Stop that,” Honami whispered, kissing Kanade’s cheek.

Kanade blinked, looking to her. “Stop what?”

“Thinking.” She murmured. “You think too much and get yourself down. It makes you do this, hurt. You don’t need to hurt alone anymore, hun. I’m here.”

For a moment, she just stared at Honami.

She sobbed, burying her face into Honami’s neck. For a moment, the drummer tensed, before she quickly relaxed and hugged Kanade, holding her close.

“I’m here… I’m here.”

Chapter Text

cognitive decline in the near future

inevitable burnout and memory loss

caused by stress

same as her father

It was genetic.

Her memory issues were genetic, of course they were. It was then they learned why Nightcord at 25:00 had ran and disappeared in the first place. Honami had always known it was hard in the Yoisaki residence, especially after Mrs. Yoisaki had passed and Mr. Yoisaki had begun to overwork himself without the help of his now late wife. Honami knew Mr. Yoisaki had been hospitalized due to overworking himself, but she didn’t think…

“Has she been overworking herself?” She asked quietly.

Three heads quietly shook. She stared at them.

A shoulder pressed against hers, a hand on hers under the dining table, arms on the back of her chair.

“I’ve been monitoring her carefully.” Mafuyu spoke up, tone empty and cold. “I didn’t think anything was wrong until she hurt herself.”

“Well, she has been…”

Honami’s eyes drifted to Ena.

Ena was frowning to herself, her arms crossing tightly over her chest.

“Kanade has been distant lately… like staring off or being unfocused, staying in her room more often.” She murmured. “That kind of stuff. We didn’t think anything of it because, it’s Kanade. We just thought she was returning to some of her old habits from back when we were Nightcord.”

“Or that’s what we tried to brush it off as…”

Honami stared.

Nightcord at 25:00 had failed Yoisaki Kanade.

Astral Wavelength had failed Yoisaki Kanade.

“That’s bullshit.”

Shiho snapped from behind Honami, leaning on the back of her chair. Glancing up, they were scowling. For a moment, Honami was scared, subconsciously shrinking down into her chair. Shiho was rarely ever angry.

“You can’t tell me, you just brushed that off. Kanade was clearly suffering and you just—“

“Shiho, that’s enough.”

Ichika spoke up, but Shiho kept ranting, so angry they started using very expressive hand gestures.

“I can’t believe you. You’re Nightcord at 25:00. You’re Astral Wavelength. You’re Kanade’s roommates, best friends. The people she chose to abandon her old life with and run away, and you— you just let her almost fucking die?”

Mafuyu stood. His expression was colder now, dark.

“Shut your mouth, Hinomori.”

“Kanade could’ve died and it would’ve been—“

Mafuyu crossed the dining table in two quick movements, jumping onto it then over and grabbing Shiho by the collar of their jacket, slamming them against the wall.

“OWN, no—“

“Stop!”

“Shut up.” Mafuyu growled.

His expression was completely blank, but it held so much fury, anger. Shiho’s glare hardened.

“Fuck you.” Shiho snapped. “You’re an ass friend to Kanade, so are they, and asser partners. You don’t deserve her.”

Mafuyu swung first.

A loud thud rung out as his fist made contact with the wall, Shiho’s head quickly swung to the side.

They scowled, but he could tell they were scared.

“Not so tough when engaged in a physical fight now?”

Mafuyu smirked. For a moment, Shiho thought they could’ve died by pure look alone.

Shiho jabbed their fist into Mafuyu’s nose, making him harshly recoil and blink away tears. It was enough time for Shiho to grab the nearest decoration — a vase of pink carnations — and smash it over Mafuyu’s head.

He cried out, before he grabbed Shiho and threw them over the table, letting them slide off and fall into the chairs Ena and Mizuki were once sitting in. They rolled onto the floor under the table, ears ringing and staring up at the table.

“Fuck.”

Shiho mumbled, putting their arm over their head.

People were yelling, but they couldn’t hear over the sound of the ringing. Their head hurt, dizzily just trying to breathe.

“Shiho, Shiho, I’m here.”

“Mrmh..?”

Gentle hands grabbed theirs, tugging them from under the table. They winced, the light too bright, and they buried their head against her shoulder.

“Breathe, Shiho, you’re okay. You’re not fighting anyone anymore.”

“Concussed.”

They mumbled.

Ichika held them gently, tucking them against herself. She was frowning, worriedly, but they could barely see past blurriness in their eyes, though they could make out the vague blob of Saki beside Ichika, the two speaking quietly to each other.

They heard the murmur of their name, but couldn’t understand it. Their head hurt so bad.

“Wh.. where’s Hona…?”

Saki held them now, Ichika having gone off.

“Hona’s dealing with AW. Icchan’s helping her. Don’t worry about it, Shii, just breathe with me. Can you do that for me?” Saki said softly.

Shiho nodded against Saki’s shoulder, giving a tired, incoherent mumble.

Leo/need took another cab home.

—

“Will Shiho be okay?”

“With rest, yes. It looks to be a minor concussion, but still one that’s bothering them.”

“Do you want us to kiss it better?”

“.. no.”

An impromptu sleepover at Saki’s house. What was new?

Shiho laid alone, curled up under the covers in the corner of the bed while they listened to their friends talk quietly on the floor. Their voices were muffled, unable to hear the words, but they heard their voices and it was reassurance enough.

They were half-asleep when the bed creaked and shifted under someone’s weight, arms reaching under their stomach and pulling them against herself like they were a dog getting cuddled.

“Saki,” they mumbled.

A giggle came, then, “How’d you guess?” in a soft voice. The door quietly shut.

“Hands small.” They answered curtly. “Ichika and Honami?”

“They decided to go out and grab you some stuff. They’ll be back soon.” Saki nuzzled into the top of their head, gently, careful not to aggravate their pain more than it was already. “We know it’s minor, but we still want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Don’t tell…”

Shiho’s hands weakly grabbed at Saki’s sleeves.

“Please. She’ll be so worried.”

Saki nodded slightly, but she was hesitant. “If it gets too bad, we have to tell Shizuku-senpai.”

They huffed.

“I’m sorry, Shiho-chan…” She gave an apologetic kiss to their temple, arms still wrapped around their torso.

“S’fine.”

They were so tired. They were half-asleep still, eyes fluttering shut. Saki shifted slightly under them, accommodating for their weight sinking into her as they let themselves relax.

“Just sleep… I’ll be right here.”

“Love you.” Shiho mumbled.

“I love you too.” Saki whispered.

Chapter Text

Kanade stared up at her ceiling. It had been a couple of days since her collapse and following breakdown. Mafuyu had been asleep next to her for however long since the commotion she overhead yesterday.

Hi Kana.

A voice made her blink.

It wasn’t Mafuyu.

She sat up slowly and looked to the closet. Across from her, in the darkness, stared back big blue eyes. She was tiny, small, with a smile so bright and wide it was like she had her parents again.

“Not now,” she whispered.

Mafu got hurt because of you, y’know!

A giggle came.

They got into a biiig fight with Hinomori! You heard it too. It sounds like they broke your flower pot.

Flower pot…

Kanade shot up from bed.

She stumbled out the door, struggling to breathe and to remember how to walk and use her fingers and hands and feet. She stepped into the dining room and stared at the empty place on the table where the carnations should have been. They weren’t there. She hurried to the kitchen, peering into the trash bin.

She had to force herself to breathe.

She stared at crushed petals and ceramics shards in the trash.

”… Mom.”

Her eyes filled with tears.

You should go back to bed.

Kanade’s gaze lifted to the figure standing at the sink. She didn’t turn to look back at her, simply gazing out the window. The dark grey cardigan draped over a school uniform, the headphones around her neck, shorter silver-blue hair.

You seem dizzy. Let Mafuyu handle this mess because you can’t do anything yourself. You’re pathetic.

She winced.

Slowly, she stumbled back toward the direction of her room. She shut the door behind her and curled up beside Mafuyu, in the comfort of their arms. They mumbled sleepily as they pulled her closer, burying their face into her shoulder.

Kanade closed her eyes.

—

They were insistent on bothering her now.

She would lay in bed, and either the warm child or the angsty teen would make a snide comment. The reaper stared from a distance.

They were mocking her.

Don’t get up, Kanade. You’ll collapse and be useless again and you’ll waste Mafuyu’s time.

Oh, Kanade! You should look at that family out the window there. They look so happy.

She wanted to disappear.

Mafuyu and Ena and Mizuki kept worrying about her. They didn’t need to. She was inconveniencing them, wasting their time. They could be doing so much better things. They could grow up, and not be attached to a weight that kept pulling them into the dark ocean as soon as they saw the light.

The ocean…

Kanade balled her hands up into fists, squeezing the fabric of the blanket.

She couldn’t swim. She knew that.

It would hurt. But it’d be easy. She would be alone.

—

No one was home today. They left her.

As everyone does. You hurt them. They leave. You push them away. They leave.

She wandered the apartment. She was alone. The voices whispered. She listened to the three — was that four? — voices talking over each other, all overlapping, and it made her head hurt. She spoke aloud to them, since she was alone.

Hi Kana.

The figure of a child scampered past her leg, giving Kanade pause.

“Hi..?”

She watched.

The child giggled. She scowled, then she sighed and rubbed at her temple, her headache worsening. She had been experiencing horrible migraines like that for God knows how long, maybe a few days, and the child smiled at her.

“What are you doing?”

Kanade asked.

The child looked at her.

Have you been composing?

Composing…

Kanade frowned. “No… I haven’t been practicing either…”

You better get back to work then.

She turned and met her middle school version’s cold eyes. It had its arms crossed and glared up at her, and she winced, shrinking slightly into herself.

Right.

If she wasn’t making music — she was useless. She had to keep working, she had to keep composing, she had to keep practicing. She turned on her heel to the music room, walking past the reaper — who she had come to know was named Blanche Aile or whatever, reaper still sounded better in her mind. She returned to her place at her piano and went to play, the sound ringing through the apartment.

She still had to save Mafuyu.

Do you see that?

At the voice, Kanade’s head turned.

Revel Uncanny stood. She wasn’t sure how this one had come into existence, but it seemed almost Mafuyu-like. emotionless and monotone, yet not as bad as OWN. It always held a bird cage, although it held a butterfly inside instead of a bird.

“See what?”

She murmured.

That red glow.

Revel Uncanny turned to Kanade, pointing off in the corner.

Kanade turned. It was a camera.

She blinked.

—

Eight cameras. Eight cameras across the apartment. Watching the front door, the living room, the kitchen, in front of the bathroom, the music room, two in Kanade and Mafuyu’s room.

What the fuck?

Someone was stalking her someone was watching her someone was looking at her through cameras someone was

The door to her room opened.

She turned.

Mafuyu stared at her, at the cameras littered across her bed, and just looked. Their expression was ever familiarly blank and neutral, but Kanade sensed concern and worry and she realized they were the one who put up the cameras.

“Why did you—?”

She snapped.

“I’m worried about you.”

They interrupted.

Mafuyu moved to stand next to her. Kanade couldn’t help glaring.

“I don’t need help. What I need is to help people, to save — to save you.”

Kanade fought back, turning to Mafuyu and unexpectedly rounding on them. She wasn’t sure why she was so angry. Something had snapped in her mind and she wasn’t sure why, something had changed and she wasn’t sure what.

“Kanade…”

Mafuyu said slowly, wincing slightly.

“No, shut up.”

They blinked at her aggression. Then, their gaze hardened.

“You don’t talk to me like that, Kanade.”

“You don’t get to set up cameras in our apartment!”

“I was concerned about you, Kanade.” Mafuyu narrowed their eyes. “Don’t push me away. You’ve been practically catatonic ever since you had your breakdown then — you practically collapsed again, you hurt yourself, Kanade, and you’re getting worse. You were talking to thin air and you don’t have the same light in your eyes as you did.”

Kanade faltered. All of it was fact. What more was there to say?

“Leave me alone.”

She snapped.

For a moment, Mafuyu lingered.

Kanade had always tried so hard to keep trying to help Mafuyu, to save them, no matter what happened. They weren’t going to let her push them away.

They stayed.

She didn’t ague.

“… Can you clean up the cameras at least?”

“Yes.”

Mafuyu moved forward, grabbing a couple of the cameras and picking them up to throw out into the trash bin in the kitchen. They did that repeatedly a couple of times until there was none left and they returned.

They stood beside Kanade.

They were both quiet.

“Kanade…”

“Don’t.”

Mafuyu went silent.

They stood quietly.

Kanade turned to Mafuyu and grabbed at their tie, tugging them down to kiss them, mashing their lips together.

They gave a strained noise against her lips, but they kissed her back. It tasted empty, but it was a kiss. They were kissing Kanade, making out with Kanade. They pushed to pin her down against the bed, feeling her grip tighten on their tie and tugging them closer. They just kissed her, more and more, craving Kanade, kissing her until they couldn’t.

Kanade pulled away first, panting and breathless.

Mafuyu breathed heavily. They looked down at her with a blank stare, but she knew better — it was full of love, and she loved them too.

“Just not now.”

Kanade whispered.

“I know.”

Mafuyu nodded.

They sat quietly for a moment.

“Kiss me again?”

Kanade asked.

Mafuyu stared. This wouldn’t resolve any of their problems, it left it undone, left Kanade some ticking time bomb ready to explode, some string waiting to snap under the pressure. But they could delay it for now.

Mafuyu leaned down and kissed Kanade again, taking her lips for them to take, and they kissed her, again and again, until they couldn’t.

Chapter Text

“Your guitar is still out of tune.”

Ichika frowned, glancing up to look at Shiho. She was silent for a moment, before she adjusted her guitar and tuned it. She had tried playing music for Shiho while they were concussed and still recovering, but they were insisting that her guitar was out of tune the whole time.

“It’s not… I think you’re making it out of tune.”

She murmured.

“But it’s out of tune...”

They whined.

Ichika sighed.

Shiho was sitting up against her shoulder, leaning on her while she played. This was okay. Ichika was just glad Shiho was resting.

“Hey, your phone’s ringing…”

She glanced down to her phone beside her knee. She was silent for a few moments, looking at the unknown caller ID, before she reached for her phone and picked up the call.

“Hello? Hoshino Ichika speaking…”

“Hello.”

Ichika blinked.

OWN was on the phone—? How did he get her number—

“May I request your presence at… I’ll text you the location.”

The call ended. Ichika quickly went to make the contact, not missing how Shiho frowned as she typed in ‘Mafuyu’ on her phone. A text came and she read the address quickly.

Mafuyu - 21:47

> You and Hinomori.

Ichika sighed. “Come on, Shiho. We gotta go.”

“Where?”

“Just trust me. I’m gonna be here, so just hold my hand.”

—

They’re in a park. Ichika paced restlessly while Shiho sat kind of despondently on a bench.

“Where is he…”

Ichika glanced around anxiously.

She knew OWN wasn’t a threat. But the way he had attacked Shiho… Mafuyu was strong but she didn’t think they were strong enough for an alter to be able to throw a whole — she glanced at Shiho — roughly 120 pound body, if she had to guess. Though Mafuyu did do all those sports activities when they were in school…

Were they a dropout now? How did they barely have any lessons or anything on the electric guitar and still play better than her? How could they hurt Shiho and scare Saki and Honami?

She remembered how Honami had to restrain OWN, staring into his eyes felt like looking into the abyss.

“Hoshino, Hinomori.”

Ichika turned.

His eyes glowed in the dark, staring at her.

“OWN-senpai…”

She bowed politely, to which OWN grabbed her shoulder gently and pushed her to stand up straight.

They were quiet, staring at each other for a moment.

“I thought this was Mafuyu.”

Shiho mumbled, looking between Ichika and OWN. Glancing back, Ichika noticed how they seemed more on edge, even with their current concussion, their hands were balled into fists, as if they were waiting to get up and beat the shit out of OWN again.

Ichika looked to OWN.

OWN nodded.

“This… is Mafuyu.”

Ichika said slowly.

“But this is an alter. This is OWN-senpai.”

Shiho blinked. “Oh, that’s what Shizuku asked me to help her look up that one time.”

Ichika paused. OWN huffed, raising his hand to scratch at the back of his neck, like he was embarrassed or something. Sheepish?

“You… knew?”

“I had an idea.”

OWN walked toward Shiho, gently taking their head into his hands. Ichika moved to sit beside them on the bench, holding Shiho’s hand with her own, squeezing reassuringly. OWN scanned over Shiho, before he nodded as if content with what he was seeing.

“You seem better.” OWN murmured.

He paused.

“I’m sorry for hurting you.”

He mumbled, though it sounded more forced than anything.

Shiho looked at him. Then they laughed, so loud and boisterous, so rambunctious, a toothy grin as a laugh burst from their lips. Ichika turned and stared, blinking.

A full laughing, toothy grin.

Ichika thought they looked…

“Your apology is stupid and half-assed.” Shiho’s laughter devolved into giggling, smirking smile over their bright grin from moments ago. “But sureee, sure, man, heh— hah !”

OWN stared, then smiled.

“You should laugh more like that, Hinomori.” He couldn’t help but chuckle.

“You, too.” Shiho winked.

Ichika couldn’t help frowning.

She had never seen Shiho like that. She wondered why she hadn’t. Part of her was…

—

For about half an hour, Ichika watched from what felt like a distance as Shiho and OWN cracked jokes to each other. She wasn’t listening to what they were saying, wired headphones in and playing music, leaning on Shiho’s shoulder. After what felt like forever, she heard a “bye” and a “see you later”.

“… you got quiet.”

Shiho murmured.

Of course they would notice — Shiho noticed everything with her, supported her, they were her pillar. Even in this state, concussed and acting not very Hinomori Shiho-like, they still noticed.

“Are you okay?”

“Fine.”

“You’re blasting music.”

“I’m okay.”

Shiho’s gaze lingered on Ichika for a few moments.

“Let’s just go home.”

Ichika stood, shoving her hands into her pockets. She didn’t wait for Shiho, beginning to walk already in the direction of her house. Shiho stared at her back.

She paused, then turned.

They were just sitting there.

“Get up…”

“I can’t,” Shiho had that tone in their voice that suggested they were about to crack a joke, and they were smiling. “Getting up without help puts me in danger.”

“Just give me the punchline.” Ichika sighed.

Shiho frowned.

They were quiet. Slowly, Shiho stood, and moved to walk beside Ichika as the two went along to her house.

—

The two didn’t say a word the whole walk, not even when the two were preparing sleeping preparations. The tension felt almost tangible. Every few seconds, Ichika felt Shiho glance over. Every time, she heard that familiar intake of breath that meant Shiho was about to say something, she clicked the volume up on her music even though it was already as high as it could go.

Shiho was just standing there while Ichika tucked herself in.

“C’mere.”

She mumbled sleepily, looking at the dimly glowing emerald green eyes.

They lingered where they were.

“Shiho.” Ichika sighed, sitting up in bed, looking at them. “Come here. I’m not mad at you…”

At the confirmation (and firmer tone), they moved, pulling their hoodie off and slowly approaching the bed. Ichika laid back down, facing the wall, slowly beginning to curl up. But then arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her close, a face pressed into her back.

It had been like this for the past couple of days.

Ichika didn’t want it to end.

Slowly, she shifted, turning. Shiho’s arms tightened around her, letting her bury her face into their shoulder.

“Sure you’re not mad? You seemed pretty mad earlier.”

“Go to sleep.”

“Okay, but—“

“Shh. Sleep.” Ichika said sternly.

Shiho hummed. “G’night, Ichika.”

Chapter Text

S hiho rolled over in bed, staring at the blank wall before them. For a moment, they sat there quietly, sleep-addled brain trying to awake and process what was wrong. They slowly sat up then, reaching for their phone, grabbing it and checking the time.

4:30 in the morning.

They felt cold.

They blinked, slowly realizing what was actually wrong, and turned to face the other side of the bed, empty, but warm, as if the body that was supposed to be laying there had just left recently. They didn’t see anything wrong with it for a moment, perhaps she had just gone to use the bathroom, or…

Looking around, Shiho noticed the jacket they had bought for Ichika that one day, was gone.

Her guitar case was still there, guitar sitting inside, but she wasn’t. Her shoes were still there, but knowing Ichika, she had left with an extra pair if she didn’t want to be found.

Hoshino Ichika was gone.

Shiho quietly went to the bathroom to vomit.

—

“Sorry, Shiho-chan, what?”

Saki had been at work one morning when the distressed call came, about an hour into her shift. Shiho was mumbling too quietly, or they were stumbling over their words – whatever the reason, she couldn’t understand them, but she could tell they were… not well.

“ She’s gone.”

Shiho murmured despondently, and she could imagine them curled up, holding their phone close to their face.

“Who is?”

“ Who do you think? ” Shiho snapped.

Saki dropped the glass she was holding. She couldn’t even sputter out an apology to the customer before she was hurrying to switch out of her uniform and to grab her things, before she left, calling an apology to her supervisor. Shiho was mumbling something she couldn’t understand.

“ Can you come here? ”

They asked, in a way full of thick emotion she thought she would cry at the sound of their voice. They seemed so lost.

“I’m already on my way, Shiho-chan.” Saki reassured gently. “I’m going to add Hona-chan to the call, okay? Talk with Icchan’s parents.”

“ I, um, already have. ” Their voice came almost empty. “ They don’t know where she could be. None of the neighbors saw her leave either, but it had to have been recent because when I— ”

“Shiho,” she interrupted, noticing how Shiho’s voice was breaking, sobs forced down deep into their throat. “Take deep breaths for me, I’m on my way, okay? It’ll be okay.”

A sniffle came. “ Okay. ”

Saki pulled her phone from her ear and tapped around for a moment. Add contact… apple pie master… ringing.

“ What—? ”

“It’s just Honami.”

“ Oh. ”

Three rings. Nothing. Saki frowned and tried again. She didn’t think Honami was busy, she would’ve told Leo/need about it, but then again, Ichika did disappear for no reason, so…

Three rings. Nothing.

Saki rang Honami again, now going to spam her messages.

—

“I’m glad we can still enjoy things together like this.” Honami said, full of warmth like she had always been.

Shibao was sitting on the floor beside her while she prepared apple pie. Once it was in the oven, she turned to face her guest, smiling at Ena. Said other drummist smiled back, a plate of a half-eaten cheesecake sitting in front of her.

“Hey…”

Ena hesitated.

“About what happened with Kanade…”

Honami’s gaze instantly went back to Ena, focusing again. She had a bad feeling in her stomach but felt that it wasn’t related to Kanade. Just something about today felt off, though she wasn’t sure what it was or could be.

“OWN— ah, Mafuyu ’s sorry for what he did to Shiho-chan.” Ena said quietly, looking down now at the plate of cheesecake she hadn’t taken a bite of in a little while. “I don’t think he meant to be so harsh during that, I think he was stressed with what happened to Kanade and snapped.”

“That’s okay…” Honami nodded slowly.

“How is she? Yoisaki-san, I mean.”

Ena paused. She thought for a moment, then frowned. “I don’t… know.”

Honami blinked.

“Ever since her breakdown, she’s been talking to thin air. She had a fight with Mafuyu about it too, something about her finding the cameras they put up to watch her while we weren’t home or present in the room with her.” Ena hesitated, taking a slow bite of her cheesecake. “I’m just worried about her. Like what if that… that happens again.”

The concern was shared. Kanade was a time bomb, but whenever she would explode was uncertain. When would she snap? When would she do something worse?

Honami looked down to Shibao.

The dog gently nuzzled his head against her leg.

Just then footsteps padded down the hall and a head of orange hair popped into the kitchen.

“Yo, Mochizuki, it’s for you.” Akito offered her phone for her. “Me and your lil brother realized it had been ringing while we were playing our game.”

Said little brother came up and hugged Honami, to which she smiled and whispered a “Hi Haru.”

Akito came closer to give her phone to her. That was when Honami caught a glance of Saki and Shiho’s contacts before the call ended and she saw that she had 15 missed calls and at least 50 messages from the two of them combined. She blinked, then gently took her phone.

“Excuse me… Haru, go play with Shibao.”

“Shibao!”

Honami stepped into her bedroom and called back her keyboardist.

“ WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!? ”

She flinched at the sound of Saki yelling into her ear and what sounded like Shiho mumbling desperate words to themselves. She didn’t know. But that meant Shiho was with Saki, which didn’t make sense because it wasn’t time for Ichika and Saki to pass Shiho yet, it was only Saturday.

“I was with Ena-san and Shinonome-san.” Honami quickly explained, then bit her tongue. “Is Shiho-chan okay?”

“ HONAMI ICHIKA IS GONE HAVE YOU LOOKED AT YOUR TEXT MESSAGES ”

Honami blinked.

She wasn’t even sure which one of them yelled at her.

Dizzily, she pulled her phone from her ear, stared at the screen, before she took a shaky breath. She clicked until she found her text messages with Ichika.

Maybe Saki and Shiho were just freaking out. Ichika had just gone on a trip with her parents surely.

She clicked the contact, looked for the location.

No location found

…

oh god.

Ichika was gone.

—

Wherever Ichika had gone, she wasn’t showing her location, nor did she leave any notes.

So Honami was stuck on the floor of her room, holding a despondent Shiho against herself and a distressed Saki in her arm. Shiho was mumbling under their breath, some incoherent words she couldn’t understand, and Saki was curled under her arm.

“Shiho, you’re sure there was nothing?”

“Mm-hm. Nothing.”

Ichika wasn’t the type of person to disappear without a trace. All three of them knew that.

“‘m gonna throw up.” Shiho mumbled, slowly beginning to peel themselves away from Honami and Saki, somewhere in the direction of the door.

“I’ll help you.”

Honami quickly went after them, picking them up and carrying Shiho to the bathroom. There was a moment of pause before Saki hurriedly followed.

None of them wanted to be alone.

—

As expected, needLe wasn’t working.

She clicked the song a few times, only for the transition to fail, and she would scowl. Turning her gaze to the sky, there were the stars. Why wasn’t needLe working? Until the wedge suddenly between her and them was causing it.

A familiar figure sat beside her and frowned worriedly.

“Ichika…”

Miku said quietly.

Ichika put her head in her hands, sitting on top of the rooftop. She choked out a sob, and arms went around her shoulders from behind, pulling her closer, one hand going to run through her hair.

“Shh… shh, shh.”

Why was she even crying? She had run away to Sekai, in only a grey hoodie with a black hood and sleeves, jeans, and socks. Like an idiot. Miku held her closer.

A blur of pink in front of her made Ichika wipe her eyes, then blink tears away, as she looked at Luka.

“Luka…?”

She weakly murmured.

Said virtual singer was frowning too, now holding Ichika’s phone. She turned the device for Ichika to see the screen and she blinked, realizing, under needLe was something else.

Integral .

It was another Leo/need song.

Ichika reached her hand out and clicked the song.

Instantly, she was somewhere else, she realized.

Miku and Luka stood beside her.

It was the jungle gym, where they had made that promise under the stars, but it was decrepit, destroyed, rotten. She couldn’t handle looking at it, some sick metaphor that she was becoming distant from Leo/need or she was destroying everything, turning her head to bury into Miku’s shoulder.

Ichika wasn’t sure if she had fallen asleep. She woke up in Sekai, though it wasn’t the School Sekai.

In this corrupted version of her fragment Sekai combined with School Sekai, she stared up at the nearly pitch black sky. She could spot a couple of stars in the sky — Regulus, Sirius, Polaris — but there was nothing else. Miku and Luka were with her at least, but she noticed how they appeared a little down.

Ah,

it’s her fault.

They would much rather be at School Sekai. They would rather be at home.

Ichika wanted to be alone, but she didn’t want to be alone either.

Miku glanced at her, sitting beside her on the rooftop of the old school. She shifted to press their shoulders together, taking her hand and holding it gently. Her fingers traced hers, the lines on her palm.

On the other side, Luka stared quietly forward, almost despondent. She seemed to be thinking, although did look at Ichika and Miku every so often, confirming they were okay.

Ichika wanted to — to what?

To be with Leo/need. To be with her best friends, her partners, her teammates, band members, dare she say unofficial lovers. She didn’t need to be with them to know there was an unspoken agreement of love. So why? why was she hiding here, why was she rotting away?

rot.

she wanted to rot.

That meant she would be forgotten about. She ran away because she wanted to be forgotten about for a time, but that was stupid, Leo/need wouldn’t forget her.

Shiho would go sleepless nights searching for her, Honami would start caring for herself less and less in tiny bits, Saki wouldn’t have that same smile on her face anymore.

Ichika thought about a flower.

What was a good…

Forget-me-nots, obviously. She had gotten them for Saki once while she was in the hospital, without telling her what it meant, a simple “ I saw them on the way here. I thought they were pretty .”

Saki gave her a look. She knew she was lying.

They didn’t elaborate.

Forget-me-nots.

They symbolized true love and respect. As a gift, it represented a promise that the giver would always remember the receiver and would keep them in their thoughts. Additionally thought of as a sign of fidelity and faithfulness.

Like…

Leo/need.

Ichika stood up, grabbed her phone, feeling Miku and Luka grab onto the sleeves of her jacket, and she clicked Integral.

Instantly, she was back in the real world.

Glancing around, she hurried, running through the rain. Her hood was pulled up over her head as her shoes smacked against wet concrete. The sidewalks were empty, the flower shop so close—

closed for the day.

what the fuck.

The world has it out for her by now, right?

Ichika spun around in a panic, before her eyes caught someone else. And light brown eyes locked with hers from across the street, standing in the rain was Kohane.

“… Ichika-chan?”

She asked quietly.

Ah, no, definitely has it out for her.

Ichika wanted to run, but her legs wouldn’t move. She stared at Kohane, then she waved.

“You saw nothing.” She said, coming out harsher than intended. “Okay? You didn’t see me.”

“But Leo/need is—!”

“I know.”

Kohane looked at her, brown eyes full of concern and worry, familiar care for a friend. For a moment, if Ichika believed hard enough, Kohane could’ve looked like Saki.

“Don’t tell them, just not yet.”

She hesitated.

“Please, Kohane.”

“… okay, Ichika-chan.”

Ichika knew better — Kohane was hesitant too, and she would probably crumble and spill to Shiho. Shiho would look for her with Saki and Honami and as much as she wanted to believe they would be angry with her for disappearing like that, they would hold her closer and sob into her, not letting her go, refusing to let her out of their sight.

Quickly, before Kohane could ask or protest anymore, Ichika turned on her heel and ran the other way.

Chapter Text

Saki and Honami are busy tending to the disappearance of their guitarist and lead vocalist and lyricist. So Shiho had to be taken care of by someone else.

Two someone else’s, actually.

And her dog.

“At least you seem okay, Shiho-chan!”

Shiho glanced up from Samo-chan, having been petting the big Samoyed lying across their lap. Kohane sat beside them, although she was furiously typing at her phone. Minori smiled brightly at them, but she seemed worried.

“… Concussion isn’t as bad. Leo/need insists on caring for me though.”

“Shizuku-chan was really worried about you, you know…”

They rolled their eyes, huffing. “Tell her she doesn’t need to. I’m fine.”

Minori gave them a grin, saying something about “big bad wolf”, though Shiho didn’t pay attention. Instead their gaze drifted to Kohane, at her phone. The sound of her tapping against her phone was loud, and for a moment, they thought she could’ve been playing a rhythm game.

“Hey, Kohane.”

Shiho called.

Said street singer flinched and looked at Shiho, ducking her phone and hiding it under her hands.

Shiho narrowed their eyes.

“Whatcha doing?” Minori asked, sitting on the grass in front of the bench, throwing a tennis ball up and down, fully aware of Samo-chan watching the ball. “You seem really distracted with your phone, Kohane-chan.”

“Yeah, Hamster.” Shiho managed a slight grin, reaching to wrap an arm around Kohane’s shoulder, moving their free hand to give her a noogie.

“Wah— Shiho-chan!”

Kohane squeaked, squirming to free herself from Shiho’s hold.

“Don’t noogie the hamster!”

Shiho doesn’t remember when they came up with those nicknames. They were cute though, they had to admit. Kohane was Hamster, Shiho was Canine, and Minori was Chipmunk.

Glancing down, Shiho noticed Kohane’s phone had slipped between her legs and fallen onto the grass. They tapped Minori’s knee with their shoe and, when she looked over, gestured to Kohane’s phone.

“Huh? Oh, Hammy-chan!”

Minori picked up Kohane’s phone, in a way where she saw the screen first, before she returned it to her.

Kohane gave Shiho a look, quickly snatching her phone back.

She knew what they had tried to do.

A few moments of silence passed. There was small talk made, Shiho asking about Samo-chan, and Minori offering them the ball. Part of them felt blessed, but they didn’t express that, taking the opportunity and chucking the ball. Expectedly, the Samoyed jumped off their lap and bolted after it.

“Oh, Kohane-chan,” Minori spoke up suddenly, “How is Ichika-chan?”

“Um—“

Kohane sent Minori a look then, murmuring “you weren’t supposed to say that around Shiho-chan…”

Minori blanked. “Oops, haha…”

“Soooo…” Shiho crossed their arms, looking between the two. “You gonna tell me?”

“Well— we were going to…” Kohane stared down at her phone now. “She’s texting me though, she asked me to keep an eye on you and the rest of Leo/need. I saw her at a flower shop when I was out two days ago, we kept in contact since.”

Shiho narrowed their eyes.

Kohane seemed to have felt it, shrinking under their glare. “I-I was going to! Just— whenever she felt ready.”

“There there, Canine-chan…”

They huffed at the attempting to be reassuring pat on their knee. Poor Minori wrapped up in this mess.

“Has she told you anything?” Shiho asked, but their voice had softened now. “Like where she may be or… that kind of stuff.”

Kohane shook her head.

“No, not really. She just said she’s on the run and doesn’t know when she’ll come back—“

Ring… ring… ring…

Shiho blinked. Minori glanced up. Kohane hurriedly checked her phone.

Kohane shushed them, before she answered the phone, putting it up to her ear.

“Ichika-chan?”

Shiho couldn’t hear what Ichika said, but Minori had jumped up quite literally, looking as if she had grown excited by the thought of Ichika coming back, but she looked worried too. Shiho grabbed her arm and tried to get her to calm down before she blurted something out.

“No, I’m not busy.” Kohane shook her head. “Ah, I’m sorry, what..?”

She paused.

“You want to come here? L-Like where I am? I’m not at home though, or at Vivid Street…”

She looked back at Minori and Shiho.

Shiho knew it must’ve looked like they were begging. Minori probably looked the same.

“I’ll send you my location, okay? Deep breaths.”

Shiho wanted to hug Kohane so tightly she stopped breathing because she had just done them a huge favor.

—

It took an hour for Ichika to get there.

She froze at the sight of Shiho there with Kohane and Minori.

Shiho locked eyes with her, and she ran. They didn’t waste a second, bolting off the bench and after her, Kohane and Minori calling out their name, but they couldn’t wait, couldn’t lose her, not again.

“Ichika!”

They yelled, weaving between people as they chased.

She didn’t answer. She seemed scared, only continuing to run. But she seemed to be slowing down, she didn’t have as much stamina as other people Shiho knew, but they knew their speed was cutting down too.

They pounced, tackled, and the two tumbled to the ground.

The concrete was hard underneath their arms, hurriedly sitting up to look at Ichika.

She looked so—

The sound of a car horn blared, loudly.

“Fuck—“

Shiho grabbed Ichika as two pairs of hands grabbed at them, hurriedly tugging them back, and the car just barely missed them. Ichika curled up into them, and they could only focus on her. Yes, Kohane and Minori had caught up to them, had been the ones to save them, and they were talking to them, they were only focused on Ichika.

“Where have you been?”

Ichika’s icy blue eyes looked up at them. She looked so tired, so hurt, drained.

“Sekai.”

Kohane and Minori were quiet instantly.

—

“I’m home.”

Shiho called out, opening the door. When they were met with silence, they stepped inside and motioned for the three to follow. Kohane and Minori helped the practically catatonic and despondent Ichika inside while Shiho led the way.

They were glad Shizuku wasn’t there. Not because they didn’t want her to be (strangely, it seemed she was more out than home. it made them cherish the moments she was home), but because how was she going to explain Ichika?

Ichika…

They had helped Ichika into Shiho’s bedroom, where she was now resting.

Former Class 1A friends stood outside in the hallway, quietly talking.

Ichika stared at the wall, curled up in Shiho’s bed. She was quiet, before she stood up, lumbering to the closet. She fished out one of Shiho’s hoodies (taking notice that Shiho had one of Saki’s and Honami’s cardigans. she took those too).

She made her way back to the bed when the door opened.

She turned. Facing Shiho. All while holding their hoodie and the cardigans of their best friends in her arms.

“You should be resting.” They mumbled, hurrying over. “Let me help you with that.”

Ichika watched as Shiho took the clothes from her and set them on the bed, closely packed together but, as if they had known where she had curled up, put it where her head would be. She stared at them for a moment, and they glanced at her.

“… Are you okay?”

She frowned at the question, then shrugged.

“We checked Sekai though. You weren’t there.” Shiho frowned themselves, looking tired, but concerned, all too worried.

For a moment, Ichika wondered if this was how Mafuyu felt.

“It was… different from School Sekai. It looked the same, but… demented.” She winced at the sound of her voice — weak, exhausted, hoarse, raspy.

They looked at her. She looked back.

It was almost like she could see the gears turning in Shiho’s head. Then, their slightly concerned expression worsened, becoming more worried, now not just visible in the eyes but their face, their whole body.

“Ichika…”

Their voice was thick, full of worry, concern, emotion they would normally never show to keep up their cold, tough guy facade. But now Hinomori goddamn Shiho was looking at them with concern and love and affection and— were they tearing up?

“If you were feeling… bad , you could’ve told us.”

She stared at them.

Ichika pushed past then, shoving herself back into Shiho’s bed, curling up once more. Shiho sighed, before they pulled the covers over her.

“I’m here now.”

She didn’t respond to them.

They loomed over the bed for a few moments, before they moved across the room to their desk.

“You’ve missed a lot of school work, but I won’t bother you with that.” Shiho kept talking, but Ichika didn’t mind. “We worked together to get it done for you.”

A beat.

“Saki really misses you, and so does Honami. I haven’t told them you’re back.”

She let out a sigh. So only Kohane, Minori, and Shiho knew right now and…

Kanade and Mafuyu.

Ichika pulled out her phone and began to text someone, opening Nightcord. It was something she downloaded shortly after her disappearance.

leonid - Today at 21:36

> kanade?

Minutes passed. No response.

K was online though, so…

K - Today at 21:40

> hello ichika-san. i’m working with astral, is everything okay?

Ichika let out a breath she had been holding for a couple of minutes.

leonid - Today at 21:40

> could i go over tomorrow morning?

K - today at 21:41

> you are always welcome at our place

> i want it to be your home too. a safe place, somewhere you can fall back on.

Chapter Text

Band practice without Ichika is painfully quiet.

Honami heard it in the way a guitar didn’t play, instead resting quietly in Ichika’s room.

Shiho plays their bass a little louder, more forcefully as if trying to fill the void of Ichika’s guitar. She found herself doing it too, hitting her drum set a little harder than she needed to, and every time, Shiho would look back at her with an unreadable expression though it felt like they were scrutinizing her.

Worst of all, was Saki.

Ever since Ichika disappeared, Saki had been playing with less fervor, moping around if she wasn’t practicing with her bandmates. She smiled less and less as days went by with nothing on Ichika’s case.

Leo/need was falling apart. Slowly.

The band had been created with all four of them in mind, it was what “need” meant after all.

Symbolizing that all four members were needed for the band to work.

Well. They’re a three-man band right now. Honami could only sigh.

—

Honami woke up to a noise.

She wasn’t quite sure what it was for a moment, unmoving to listen. Shibao was scratching at her door, something he never does, and he should’ve been sleeping in the living room.

If the absence of light outside told her anything, it was the middle of the night.

Her eyes landed on a figure standing over her bed.

Disturbing fact 1: someone was in her house.

Honami didn’t panic, didn’t freak out.

For some reason, as she locked eyes with it, she knew she could trust it, gazing into its icy blue eyes that looked familiarly beautiful. It stared at her silently. Though it knew for certain that she was awake, it didn’t say anything, didn’t indicate that it knew that she knew.

A moment passed before it moved toward the bedroom door.

She noticed her window was open, assuming that was how the intruder entered her room. She sat up slowly to close the window, locking it.

Disturbing fact 2: this person picked the lock on her window.

When she heard the familiar noise of Shibao’s happy huffing noise, she looked over, seeing her Shiba Inu willingly let this stranger hold him, even licking at its face like he knew it and had missed it like the dog he was.

The bedroom door shut, and it turned to look at her again, slowly crossing the bedroom to sit beside her on her bed.

They didn’t say anything, so she didn’t either.

Shibao’s snout knocked the hood off the stranger’s head, still excitedly nuzzling against them, and Honami stared.

“Ichika-chan…?”

Ichika didn’t say anything, continuing to pet Shibao, the dog sitting in her lap.

Honami looked over Ichika while she catatonically pet her dog. Ichika seemed out of it, her eyes glazed over, and her overall appearance looking a little more than ragged.

She took notice she was wearing the hoodie that Shiho had bought for her, the one that had gone missing when she did.

“Ichika-chan,” she said softly, watching as cloudy eyes looked up at her.

She frowned. The caregiver in her was rising to the top, pushing past sleepiness and grogginess.

She did just want to go back to bed, but Ichika was here, and she seemed in a dire state that she couldn’t leave her alone in. Ichika seemed to realize that too because she set Shibao down on the bed, though the dog was insistent on staying close to her, and she reached her arms up.

Honami reached down, her arms looping around Ichika’s waist, pulling her up and hugging her close.

“Ichika,” she repeated, albeit without the honorific.

“… mm?”

“Can I see your arms?”

Ichika froze. Then she whined, muffled by her shoving her face into Honami’s shoulder, and Honami took the chance to pull up her sleeves.

She stifled a sigh, only concern in her eyes.

There were bandages.

Clearly not done by a professional, but someone who at the very least knew what they were doing. The handiwork looked familiar.

“Did you see Kanade?”

“Mhm.”

That explained it.

Honami made a mental note to ask Kanade about Ichika’s disappearance.

“Is it bad?” She asked quietly.

Her friend tensed, before hesitantly shaking her head. That was fine. Honami leaned down and gently kissed Ichika’s bandaged forearm, and she heard her hold back a sob.

“Come to bed.”

Honami’s voice was gentle. Ichika moved with her, laying on the bed, Shibao moving to lay on Ichika’s stomach.

Ichika listened as Honami hummed a song she didn’t recognize in her dazed condition. One thing after another had occurred and she snuck out of Shiho’s house, ran to Astral’s, and now she was here, curled up in Honami’s arms as her head rested on her chest as they lay in her bed together.

Honami was holding Ichika’s hand with one of her own, the other combing through her hair.

She was quiet.

It was comforting.

Chapter Text

The sound of the door opening then closing grabbed her attention, stirring her awake. Ichika laid curled up in her lap, her fingers having been running through her hair before she had fallen asleep on the couch. She glanced up to see Ena and Mizuki walking past them toward the kitchen.

“Ooh, it smells good in here, Honami-chan!”

“Mochizuki-san is making us dinner. Ena, is your brother not coming over this time?”

“Ah? No, he said he would hang out with his groupmates some more before coming over.”

“I see.”

“Hehe~! Lil Bro looked so happy to see us hanging out together!”

“Ah, shut up, Mizuki…”

Kanade tuned them out then. Her fingers continued to comb through Ichika’s hair. The guitarist didn’t seem awake. She looked down at Ichika’s sleeves, wondering if she had done good enough. It had been late that day, when there was a pounding at the door and pouring rain out.

She remembered lazily crawling out of bed with Mafuyu following her warily.

She had opened the front door and there stood Ichika, soaked in rain water and her hands dripping with something red.

Kanade had been staring when Mafuyu pushed past her and rushed Ichika inside and to the bathroom. They dragged her along too. Kanade’s hands were shaking as she held Ichika close, watching as Mafuyu cleaned the wounds.

“Do you still have the knife?” Mafuyu had asked.

Ichika didn’t say anything.

“Hoshino-san.” Mafuyu murmured, a little firmer this time, as their hand came up to grip Ichika’s chin. “Do you still have it?”

“… Yeah. It’s in my pocket.”

“Let Kanade take it.”

At that, Ichika flinched, making Kanade squeak fearfully.

“But—“

“No.” Mafuyu looked to Kanade. “Take it.”

Kanade fumbled around for a moment before she found the knife, pulling it from Ichika’s pocket and leaning up to drop it into the sink. Mafuyu didn’t order her to do anything more for a little while.

Ichika was curled up into Kanade, and she was happy to keep running her hands through her hair, whispering the most reassuring words she could with her voice trembling.

“Kanade,” Mafuyu called.

“Hm?”

“Can you wrap Ichika’s arms? I’m going to clean this knife.” Mafuyu stood and grabbed the knife from the sink, turning on the faucet.

Kanade was quiet.

“How do I do that?”

“Just remember what Honami did.”

“Oh.”

What Honami did…

Kanade’s hands trembled as she wrapped gauze around Ichika’s forearms, murmuring a quiet apology every so often. Ichika seemed tense when it was all done, so Kanade hesitated, before she leaned forward and kissed Ichika’s nose.

Ichika blinked, looked at her, then flushed, and looked away.

Kanade giggled and leaned in to kiss Ichika’s wrists, as if a silent promise. Trust me. I love you. Rely on me.

And so, after that, Astral Wavelength had been where Ichika had been running off to when she needed safety. It was why Mafuyu had been fronting more often, in case Ichika was there and needed to be taken care of alongside Kanade.

“—anadee~!”

Kanade blinked.

She looked to Mizuki, who was naturally beaming, though she noticed the cat-like smirk on their face.

She smiled. “Yeah?”

“Me and Ena were told to go out to buy some ingredients for, uhh, what was it?”

“It was dinner!”

“Okay! So we’re going to buy stuff for dinner, and Ena wanted to know if you wanted to come with since you’ve been cooped up in the house all day.”

Kanade was quiet for a moment, then, with one final glance to Ichika, nodded.

“Okay~!”

“Tell Mafuyu they’re on Ichika duty.”

Ena stumbled by behind the couch and pinched Mizuki’s cheek, but the two were giggling and laughing, for no reason apparently. It had Kanade smiling a bit too.

“Mafuyu!” Ena called. “Did you—“

“I heard.”

Quickly, Kanade, Ena, and Mizuki were outside.

“What are we getting?”

“… I left the shopping list inside.”

Ena groaned. “Let’s just go! I got it memorized, we don’t need the list, I heard what Honami-chan said she needed.”

“You’re so smart, Enanan!”

“Shut up!”

Kanade mumbled a thank you to Mafuyu as they passed the shopping list through the door to her. She glanced up at Ena and Mizuki, smiling softly as they bantered, and for a moment, it felt as if nothing had ever happened. Like they were on Nightcord and calling at late hours of the night, where the two would argue playfully. Kanade missed those days.

“I have the list.” She hesitantly butt in.

“Oh—!” Ena turned to Kanade with a beaming grin. “Thank you, Kanade..”

“Ehh? You weren’t so nice to me!”

“Ah, shut it!”

Kanade turned away and began to walk, knowing the way off to the grocery store where they would buy their items from. Beside her, Ena and Mizuki filled the silence by pointing out random things or talking about random topics. Kanade appreciated it since she didn’t have much to say and she didn’t really like the awkward silence between two usually talkative people.

—

“Do you think they’ll be okay out there?”

Honami asked practically as soon as Kanade shut the door and Mafuyu glanced over. They had Ichika clinging to their back, piggybacking them. If they were bothered by her weight, they didn’t visibly show it.

“They’ll be fine.”

Mafuyu huffed, standing next to Honami in the kitchen.

She stared silently at the stove. There was nothing on there except for the remnants of that day’s breakfast. She had made something Ichika would eat, Mafuyu took it without a care, and Ena and Mizuki chowed down on their respective meals. But Kanade had barely eaten.

“Mochizuki-san.”

Honami looked over at Mafuyu. They were staring at her with an expression she couldn’t recognize. She didn’t know what it meant.

She looked down.

Ichika was still piggybacking Mafuyu, clinging to them so tightly, arms wrapped around their neck with her legs around their waist. Her face was buried into the back of their shoulder. Honami wasn’t sure if Ichika was sleeping or not.

Then Mafuyu moved.

Honami blinked as she watched Mafuyu set Ichika down at the kitchen table. Her gaze was still on them as they removed their sweatshirt and laid it over Ichika, patting her back and covering her head. Mafuyu lingered for a moment before returning to Honami’s side.

“You don’t want to leave me, do you?”

She smiled, giggling a little, as her cheeks felt warm.

“No.”

Yet Mafuyu played along, shaking their head. They glanced away.

“I don’t want to leave you. You… make me feel warm, like Kanade does.”

Honami nodded slowly, her gaze fixated on Mafuyu’s face. The way their brow was furrowed ever so slightly and their eyes were on the floor, not looking at her, but seemed as if they wanted to.

Then Mafuyu looked up at her.

Honami stared back.

Even as they took a step closer and their hands came up to rest on the countertop behind her, her back pressed into the counter. She kept looking at them, and they didn’t break eye contact.

Her hands rose to rest on their shoulders, then back to wrap her arms around their neck.

Mafuyu leaned forward.

Instantly, their lips were on hers and they were kissing. It was gentle, as tender as Mafuyu’s hands trailing down Honami’s sides to grip her waist. She hummed into their lips, a hand moving to entangle into their hair, combing through the dark purple locks.

“Mmh.”

Mafuyu seemed to appreciate the contact anyway as they pushed more forward, pressing her against the counter more as their gentleness never faltered.

“Kiss me.”

They rumbled. Honami smiled against their lips before she leaned forward, kissing them more properly.

They stood like each together in each other’s arms, tasting each other’s lips, for a long while. Mafuyu barely pulled away unless it was for a break for oxygen, and Honami was completely fine with that. She was content with kissing them.

Though — what did this mean?

Honami had been Kanade and soon after Mafuyu’s housekeeper for a long while. But now, they were kissing quietly in the corner of the kitchen. Mafuyu was tenderly gripping her waist, holding her close, and she didn’t let go of them either.

Then Mafuyu abruptly pulled away with a slight growl, and Honami couldn’t help the slight whine.

She could hear the faint sound of the front door being unlocked.

Honami flinched away and quickly hurried to make herself presentable. Mafuyu looked at her for a few moments longer before they stepped back, a respectful distance.

Come back , she mouthed to them.

Mafuyu blinked.

Then, after a moment of hesitation, they shuffled to stand next to them, enough for her hand to grip the hem of their shirt.

The front door opened, followed by two loud voices, then the door closed.

Kanade peeked inside. She smiled at Honami and Mafuyu, though it did seem hesitant, faltering a bit as she saw how close they were to each other. She glanced over to see Ichika resting at the kitchen table then looked over at Honami and Mafuyu again.

She walked away.

—

Honami went out on a walk. Her head was racing with thoughts. She needed time to herself.

Mafuyu had understood that and let her go.

Her hand raised to knock on the door.

A few moments passed, before it cracked open, and she smiled at light blue eyes looking at her from behind the door. Shizuku pulled the door open before pulling Honami inside for a quick hug, shutting the door behind her.

“Aww, I haven’t seen you in forever!”

“Shizuku-senpai…”

Honami’s cheeks reddened from slight embarrassment, feeling Shizuku cup her cheeks and kiss her forehead. It was familiar affection she had gotten when she was younger, and she always enjoyed it.

she wondered if this was how Shiho felt.

“Make sure you lock it.” Shiho’s voice came from the living room. “And who is it?”

“It’s Honami-chan!”

“Hi Shiho-chan.”

Shiho was quiet for a few moments before they got up from the couch and peeked around to see Honami.

“You didn’t text.”

They mumbled, seemingly more upset about the inconvenience.

Shiho sighed before they walked over to pull Honami from their older sister’s clutches, but not before they got a kiss on the forehead in turn. They grumbled, ducking their head to hide their embarrassed face, then they hurried to shove Honami to their room.

“What are you doing here?”

They asked as soon as the door closed, looking up at Honami.

“I…”

She hesitated, looking down at them.

It would’ve been easier to go to Saki, wouldn’t it? Or maybe Ichika — but she was in no state to be thinking about a polyamorous relationship as of now.

Honami sat on the edge of Shiho’s bed. She intertwined her fingers, staring down at the floor uncertainly.

Shiho was quiet before they kneeled in front of Honami, a little unsteady on their own two feet. but managing to keep themself stable. Their hands wrapped around hers.

“Hey,” their voice softened, but still held up the gruff edge with their tough persona. “What’s wrong?”

She liked when Shiho sounded like that, when their voice got all soft when they were with their bandmates, worried about them. Especially when it was so blatantly obvious that something was going on.

“You… remember how Saki-chan told you it looked like me and Asahina-senpai kissed that one time?”

Shiho frowned.

“… Yeah.” They nodded slowly.

“Where are you going with this?”

Honami couldn’t read the expression on Shiho’s face. Usually, she could read them well, better than herself. It was as if she understood her bandmates more than.. herself.

Shiho looked almost upset.

She wasn’t sure.

“Well, I… went over to their apartment and…” Honami bit her lip. “I… kissed Asahina-senpai.”

Subtly, Shiho’s hands tightened around hers, then loosened. There was a flash of something on their face, before it vanished. She couldn’t see what it was.

Then she realized when they pulled away from her abruptly, standing up and crossing their arms.

“So,” Shiho started slowly. “You came to my house after kissing Asahina. Just to tell me that?”

“No, no— that’s—“

Honami paused.

Shiho was jealous . She could see it now, in how their expression hardened and the way they held their shoulders seemed tighter than usual. The way they wouldn’t meet her gaze, almost sounding detached.

Hinomori Shiho was jealous .

Honami blinked.

She didn’t want to lose Shiho.

“Shiho-chan, I…” she whispered. “I love you too.”

Shiho looked away.

“But I also love Ichika-chan, and Saki-chan… Asahina-senpai, Yoisaki-san.”

Shiho nodded slowly. Then they sighed.

“Okay, look,” they sat down beside her, reaching over to grab her hand and interlock their fingers, though they acted as if she had done that and not them. “I… understand what you’re trying to say.”

Honami let out a sigh of relief.

“But… do you want to be with us or them?”

“You.”

Shiho looked over. Honami was looking at them.

“I wouldn’t trade Leo/need for anything.”

They smirked. “That’s our leader.”

She flushed.

“So… let me get this straight.” Shiho pulled away to pull a small notebook from their shelf, pulling a pen from their pocket and starting to write. It was always easier for them to put their thoughts on paper, Honami knew that.

When they were done, they showed it to her.

Honami: in love with Leo/need and Asahina + Yoisaki

Wants to be with both but heart is with Leoni

Talk to Asahina about it? + Yoisaki.

Honami nodded slowly, then looked over at them. They seemed stressed. She frowned, they noticed, tilting their head like a curious pet.

She leaned forward and kissed Shiho’s cheek.

“Ah— Honami …”

Shiho ducked down. They were embarrassed, and more so when she giggled at them. They closed their notebook and gently smacked at her shoulder with it, groaning.

“Don’t play with me.”

“Hehe, sorry, Shiho-chan.”

Honami looked at Shiho and they slowly glanced up to look at her. They didn’t say anything, so she didn’t either. They just stared at each other.

“I should go talk to Asahina-senpai and Yoisaki-san.”

She hurriedly stood, avoiding the slight change in their expression.

“Ichika-chan is going to miss me if I’m gone too long and—“

Honami paused as Shiho gently grabbed at the collar of her shirt and pulled her down to kiss her. It was quick, chaste, but enough to leave an impression.

They stared at each other.

“I love you too.” Shiho mumbled.

Honami smiled. “I know. You got jealous when I told you anyway.”

Shiho flushed.

“Get outta my house!”

“Hehe, okay, okay!”

—

Later, Kanade and Mafuyu sat in the former’s room. She was quiet as her hands combed through their hair.

Ena and Mizuki were in their rooms too. Ichika was in the living room with Honami.

Then, there was a gentle knock.

Kanade flinched.

“I’ll get it.”

Mafuyu mumbled and got up, lumbering over to the door before they opened it, yawning. They rubbed at their eyes to see Honami sitting there, and they tilted their head.

“Honami..?”

Behind them, Kanade tensed. She wasn’t a fool, she noticed that Mafuyu called Honami by name.

“I’m sorry to disturb, Yoisaki-san, Mafuyu, but…”

Honami stepped inside. Briefly, her hand brushed against Mafuyu’s chest, resting over their heart, feeling it beat under her palm. She looked over to see Kanade looking between them strangely.

Mafuyu shut the door and locked it.

“Yoisaki-san,” Honami began. “I have something to confess to you.”

Kanade slowly sat up as Honami sat on the edge of the bed and Mafuyu moved to sit beside their partner.

“What… is it?”

She quietly asked, looking at Honami worriedly. Besides her, Mafuyu yawned loudly. Kanade looked at them with a slightly disapproving look, as if telling them “now isn’t the time”. Then she looked back to Honami.

“… I love you.”

Honami admitted softly, so quiet, Kanade could’ve missed it.

she blinked.

“And Mafuyu — but I love Leo/need too.”

Mafuyu frowned. “You didn’t tell me that.”

Kanade reached over to pinch Mafuyu’s thumb.

“Sorry.” They mumbled.

Honami shook her head. She wasn’t sure what to tell them, her heart belonged to her childhood friends, but she felt her love reaching out to Kanade and Mafuyu as well. She didn’t understand.

Kanade was quiet.

“Maybe…”

Mafuyu hesitated, chiming in rather curtly.

“You should be with Leo/need,” they watched the way Honami flushed, “but maybe you could ask them to also… be more than friends with us? But unlabeled.” Mafuyu tapped their chin. “I’m sure they’ll understand if you’ll tell them.”

“We can be there if it makes you more comfortable.” Kanade smiled reassuringly.

Honami smiled back.

“Ah, I’d like that…”

She looked to Kanade, then Mafuyu, then back to Kanade. She knew the feelings between her and Mafuyu were reciprocated but—

Kanade crawled over on the bed and hugged her tightly.

“I love you too,” she whispered, “I’m just… not ready.”

Mafuyu’s hand gently planted itself on Kanade’s back. Honami nodded slightly before hugging back.

She understood.

“Ah, since we’re here and alone…”

Honami hesitated.

“Kanade-san, while you were at the hospital…”

Kanade looked up at her, tilting her head slightly. Mafuyu seemed to tune into the conversation, eyes narrowing slightly as they realized this conversation was going to take a dark turn.

“… The doctors asked me about you.”

Kanade froze.

“‘The daughter of Yoisaki-san, right?’ They said.” Honami spoke softly, slowly, feeling Kanade tense under her arms. “They… told me they tried to call you after you disappeared, but they couldn’t get through to you. They told me the original call was an accident meant for someone else.”

Kanade stared. She wasn’t sure how to feel, but her heart was racing, pounding in her ears. She could only focus on Honami’s words, face tucked into her shoulder.

“They…”

Honami hesitated.

“No, I shouldn’t—“

“Tell me.”

Kanade sounded a way she hadn’t heard before; angry, cold. The sound of a grieving child who never mourned properly.

Honami sucked in a breath.

“They said your father was alive for a time after you left. But when it had been a few weeks without you, he…”

Kanade didn’t say anything. Didn’t react.

“It was as if your presence subconsciously kept him alive.”

Kanade wasn’t sure who said that. It didn’t sound like Honami, but didn’t sound like Mafuyu either. It sounded just as cold as she had a moment ago yet empty, masculine.

Kaito.

It was her fault. If only she had stayed—

Kanade screamed.

Chapter Text

A scream pierced the night.

Then, a flash of light, and she was running. The cold feeling of the Empty Sekai dug into her skin, feeling bitter, harsh, freezing, and yet she ran. She didn’t stop running.

She couldn’t believe that.

No, it couldn’t be.

It couldn’t be. she felt sick. It couldn’t be.

“Kanade!”

She ignored it. She kept running.

She had failed her father again. Once by composing that damn song, the song that should’ve never been composed, she never

should’ve been born, the song that destroyed everything she had left. And then, now, leaving behind her father when he was alive, him dying because she was so careless, so ready to run.

She wanted to disappear.

The lake was up ahead.

Then she stumbled as someone tackled into her, causing her to fall hard on the floor.

Firm hands wrestled her own, pinning her down. She cried, looking up to meet blue eyes as cold as hers, darker though, duller. The Virtual Singer was heaving as he loomed over her, staring down at Kanade.

Kanade didn’t say anything to Kaito.

She let him gather her up in his arms, holding her securely and yet gently, curling up in his arms. She felt him hold her close, cradling her, and she didn’t fight back.

“Kanade!”

Kaito stood still as Luka hurried up, looking over Kanade with worry.

While the two Virtual Singers were made from Mafuyu’s feelings, they were closely intertwined with Kanade’s presence in the Sekai. So much so, they had a slight insight to her emotions as well. So when Kanade snapped, the two were quickly alerted.

“Is she okay?”

“Despondent.”

Kaito sounded emptier than usual, and Luka lacked the usual playful charm in her voice.

“Let’s go.”

He turned and began walking off toward the lake, where Kanade had been heading.

Luka made a noise of protest.

“But that’s where— shouldn’t we go back, you big dolt?”

Kaito sent a glare back at Luka.

“Kanade shouldn’t be near too many people in this state.” He shook his head, before he continued walking. “Come with me or not, I don’t care.”

There was a moment of hesitation, before Kanade listened to the sound of footsteps coming closer. The two didn’t say anything, so she didn’t either, curled up in Kaito’s arms as he cradled her like as she was fragile, could break at any moment. she wasn’t fragile, she…

she let herself be lulled to sleep.

—

Ichika had woken up to a scream — then Honami and Mafuyu arguing.

She lazily sat up, peeking over the back of the couch to peer into the hallway, where she saw Mafuyu (though it looked it be Mafuyu-senpai and OWN-senpai cofronting) looming over Honami even though he was taller then she realized Honami was shrunken against the wall, and she was scared.

She was holding her phone and Ichika squinted in the dark, trying to see what was on her screen, though it was hard because Mafuyu was still yelling and Honami kept flinching and cowering.

…

She hasn’t seen Honami look so scared before.

No, why is she—?

This looked familiar. Why wasn’t she moving? Honami’s eyes were glazed over, Ichika realized. She was barely responding to Mafuyu, meanwhile Ena and Mizuki were actively trying to deescalate the situation.

Ichika jumped over the back of the couch and shoved herself between Mafuyu and Honami, pushing him away.

Mafuyu’s cold glare was directed to her now.

She swallowed hard.

“Back off.” She put on her best scowl, though it probably wasn’t worth it. “If you want to hurt Honami, you’re going to have to go through me first.”

She wanted to defend Honami, just like then. Mafuyu stared at her for a few moments before scoffing and turning away, as if deciding Ichika wasn’t worth the effort or energy. He stormed into Kanade’s now empty room, grabbing his phone and clicking something.

Ichika watched as Mafuyu vanished into a familiar light before her eyes.

Ena and Mizuki froze, then looked at Ichika and Honami.

“Um—“

“I need to check on Kanade!”

Ena turned to rush off into her room and Mizuki stood there for a moment. Then, they called a quick sorry before they did the same.

It was quiet.

Ichika stood where she was, now to defend Honami from.. nothingness. She flinched as she felt Honami slump over onto her, her breathing labored, ragged, feeling her hands grabbing at the back of her hoodie.

“I’m here.”

Ichika whispered, reaching a hand up to cup the back of Honami’s head, tucking it into her neck.

“It’s okay. Breathe for me. It’s okay, I’m here, you’re safe.”

She inhaled slowly, held it for a few seconds, then exhaled. Automatically, Honami gradually began to follow the same pattern. Ichika let her fingers comb through her hair.

“It’s alright. You’re safe, we’re alone. No one’s going to hurt you.”

Slightly, Honami nodded against Ichika’s neck. Ichika smiled.

“I love you.”

She let it slip.

Honami stiffened.

“Wh-What?”

“Huh?”

“ WHAT?! ”

Ichika flinched, blinking, then looked down at Honami’s phone, which she could see was now on a facetime call with Shiho, since her arms were around Ichika’s waist, though she wasn’t sure when that happened.

“… Shiho?”

“ God— Me and Saki are on our way. Just hold on. ”

Ichika nodded, then slightly turned her head.

“Hona,” she said softly. “Do you think you can wait for them?”

“Mhm.”

“Okay.”

“ I don’t even know why I got so mad. I already knew Honami liked you too and Saki and— “

“Wait, why did you say ‘too’?” Ichika blinked.

“ —and Yoisaki and Asahina, which kind of pisses me off, like, why can’t Honami just belong to us— “

Ichika’s face was red.

She looked to Honami, who looked to be blushing too.

“You smell nice.” She murmured.

Ichika felt something in her brain explode.

“W-We should sit on the couch! And wait! For Saki and Shiho!”

—

“They have a Sekai too?”

Leo/need was gathered in the School Sekai, since it seemed the safest place due to the issue that an aggressive Mafuyu could come back at any moment.

They sat in a circle on the floor in one of the classrooms, going in order from Ichika, Honami, Saki, and Shiho.

“Yeah.”

Ichika nodded.

“While we were waiting for you,” avoiding Shiho’s skeptical glare, Ichika looked to the floor, “Honami told me about how she watched Kanade break down then click a song file on her phone then—“

“She entered their Sekai.”

Shiho murmured, intently watching Ichika nod.

“Mafuyu was quick to follow after I intervened.” Ichika looked to Honami, who was curled up in Saki’s arms, looking much smaller than she actually was. “Followed by, um, Ena then Mizuki.”

Saki looked up to see Ichika and put on her best smile.

Ichika felt her chest flutter. She quickly looked away.

“Did you see what it was called?” Shiho’s new question directed her attention back. “The song.”

“No.”

Shiho frowned.

“Ours is need/Le , but we’ve never seen Asahina here.” Shiho hummed, reaching to grab their journal. Quickly, they sketched the School Sekai, then wrote ‘accessed by need/Le’ next to it.

Ichika peered over.

“Let’s say,” Shiho started, “AW does have a Sekai that they access using a song. We know this isn’t need/Le , because Miku and the others would’ve told us about someone new in the Sekai. So it’s a different song.”

They moved to the other part of the page, writing ‘another Sekai’ then ‘another song?’

Shiho was quiet for a moment.

“Oh.”

“Shiho?”

Ichika looked up at them worriedly, watching the expression on their face. It was one they used when they were thinking hard, though the expression itself looked blank and .. empty.

“That means…”

Shiho flipped the page. Quickly, they wrote.

Leo/need: School Sekai, song: need/Le

MORE MORE JUMP!

Vivid BAD SQUAD

Wonderlands x Showtime

Nightcord at 25

Ichika blinked. Then looked to Shiho. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Shiho looked like they were wracking their memory, frantically trying to rummage through anything that might help their case. Ichika could see it now; Shiho complaining of a headache.

So she leaned forward a bit, planting a hand on the floor between her and Shiho to hold herself up, watching emerald green eyes look up at her. Shiho didn’t move. Ichika took it as permission.

A kiss to the jaw.

“Hm.”

Shiho only hummed.

Then a kiss to the cheek.

Shiho turned their head this time, capturing Ichika’s lips with their own. She panicked at first, but they didn’t seem upset. It seemed more purposeful.

It was short.

And interrupted by Saki shoving herself between them, quickly taking Ichika’s lips into her own and hugging her tightly. Ichika felt dizzy, but leaned into it, closing her eyes.

When Saki pulled away from her, Ichika watched to see her scramble over to Shiho. She smiled as Shiho tried to push Saki away, but ended up (easily) relenting to the kiss.

“Okay, okay!” Shiho finally pushed Saki off them, but gently, “I-I need to focus, that’s enough kissing for one day!”

Saki whined. “But Hona-chan deserves a kiss too!”

At the mention of her name, Honami blinked, looking up from the floor. She giggled a little, scooting closer to Ichika, who quickly wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her close as possible.

“I already kissed Honami earlier.” Shiho grumbled, crossing their arms.

It was cute, their vain attempt to keep dignity.

They were all quiet for a moment, save for Saki dragging Shiho across the floor until they were all cuddled up to Ichika. They sat in each other’s warmth’s for a moment, thinking to themselves.

“I love you all.”

Ichika whispered.

A few moments of silence passed before they all mumbled their own variations of reciprocation. (“And we love you too, Ichika-chan.” “Aww, Icchan! We love you more!” “… Love you most..” )

—

Kanade awoke in someone’s arms.

She was being rocked back and forth, slowly, gently, lovingly. She appreciated it, curling up into them. They were careful with her, arms as if they knew how to cradle her, and she sobbed slightly.

The rocking stopped, and she felt the body stiffen. Then, slowly, continued.

“Mom…”

Kanade whispered.

“… You want your mom?” A voice asked slowly. It sounded familiar. It was trying its best to sound gentle, even if it sounded dull and empty.

“‘m sorry, Dad. I want Mom…”

The rocking stopped. Then Kanade felt herself jostle a little as the body shifted her to one arm, reaching with the other.

“She said she wants you.”

“She said she—?”

“Play along.”

A giggle came. “I didn’t know you could be this way.”

“Shut it, will you?”

Kanade kept her eyes closed. She didn’t want the illusion to break, she didn’t want the dream to end. She was at home, younger again, having just had a nightmare.

She was taken from Dad’s arms by her mom, who cradled her softer than Dad had.

“Shh, it’s okay.” Mom gently stroked her cheek. “We’re here now, honey.”

It sounded familiar. She wanted to feel this way again. She sniffled, burying her face into her mom’s hand, curling up more in her arms. She heard Dad scoot closer, all the way until his knees touched Mom’s, and they were close.

“Is she okay?”

A new voice came.

It broke the illusion.

“Mafuyu…?”

Kanade opened her eyes, lifting her head over Mom’s shoulder, peering at Mafuyu through pink hair. Her partner stood worriedly, then hurried over.

“Ah, can you take her?” Mom asked. “I want to have a word with Mafuyu if that’s okay.”

“Urk—“ Dad hurried to take her.

“Um. Yes.”

Kanade closed her eyes.

“Dad.” Her hands gently grabbed at his shirt. She didn’t want him to go too. She didn’t want to be alone again. Dad was still before his arms went around her shoulders, holding her tightly.

“I’m here, Kanade.” He mumbled. “… Papa’s here.”

Kanade nodded slowly as the dream began to fade.

… wasn’t she in Sekai after Honami…

Dad…

he isn’t coming back anymore. she won’t be able to go to the hospital anymore to just see his face, to know he was alive. she had left, and he died. that was why he was unexpectedly there next to Mom.

Sekai.

“… Kaito?”

He stiffened. Then scoffed.

“What gave it away?”

He didn’t let her go.

Kanade shook her head. “Nothing. I just… assumed. Was it…?”

“Luka was here.” Kaito nodded sharply. “She’s off talking with Mafuyu now though.”

“Don’t go.”

She sobbed at the thought. She didn’t want to be alone. Kaito grunted then held her tighter, squeezing her reassuringly with his arms.

“I’m here.”

She was quiet.

“Kaito?”

“Hm.”

“Can you…” She hesitated. “Can you pat my head? And, tell me how proud you are of me for coming this far and not giving up…”

Kaito was still for a moment, the faint sound of Mafuyu and Luka talking stopped. She was about to tell him ‘nevermind’, when Kaito raised his hand and ruffled her hair, gently, patting her head.

Kanade squeaked.

“You’ve…” Kaito drawled. “You’re strong, Kanade. Even after everything, you never gave up. That’s something you can do if you’re strong, and you are. You never gave up, never faltered, and for that, I’m proud of you, Kanade.”

Kanade was quiet.

She sobbed, crying into Kaito’s chest. He never let go of her, only holding her tighter.