Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Shotaro remembers being kissed by the fire. 

They don’t even know how he was able to escape unscathed, without a single burn to serve as evidence or a trophy. He remembers waking up in the middle of the flames and running immediately, almost unconsciously. He remembers climbing the stairs, coughing, getting to the deck and realizing that they weren’t being attacked - the ship was, somehow, on fire.

At that time, Shotaro had two things: the clothes on his body and his mates. He had given away all his belongings because his crew provided him with everything. Of course, he had sold some items way before getting on a ship. So when he looked around him to see the ship burning and everyone he loved screaming and running, he knew fear. True horror. 

The sea was agitated, the sky deep dark blue, and under the night of a new moon, only the flames could light his way. He pulled up his shirt to cover his face and walked around even with smoke blinding him, screaming the name of his captain repeatedly. 

Someone grabbed him. It was Jeno. 

“Oh, for all the sea gods, you're safe!” He engulfed Shotaro in a hug and dragged him to the bow. “Taro is here!”

The strong wind was removing the smoke in the extremities and Shotaro was finally able to see the group standing there. 

“Where--where is he?” Taeyong said.

The sight was now clear. His captain ran to him and held Shotaro, pulling him away from Jeno’s arms. 

“Are you hurt?” Taeyong asked. His voice was hoarse and his face gray, but his eyes were bright as always.

“No, captain,” Shotaro mumbled, tasting safety for a second. “Captain, I--”

“The kids are safe,” Jaehyun screamed near them. “Put him in the boat. He’s the last one.” 

Taeyong nodded, but then he pressed his forehead against Shotaro’s sweetly. His body was warm and wet. 

“You’ll be the captain now. Take care of them.”

Shotaro couldn’t decipher the message - he was then shoved around like a pebble and his voice was too quiet against the screams; he wanted to ask what was happening, he wanted to help and do anything, really. 

A body hit the water and silenced his thoughts. There was only fear.

Yukhei , someone screamed. Shotaro fell too, but his back hit wood, making him curl with pain. It was not a nightmare. It was real. 

He looked up and saw three of his senior crew members pulling ropes, framed by a starry sky and thick smoke. 

“Hyung,” a tiny voice called. 

Shotaro was in a rowing boat and he wasn’t alone. He sat up, startled, and looked back. There, sitting next to him, they were: Wonbin, holding Seunghan in his arms and Sungchan, behind them, with the oars. 

Shotaro felt like crying, but he immediately understood as soon as the boat hit the water that the crew gave them the strongest rowing boat available. 

His words died in his throat. 

“Go,” someone screamed and Sungchan started to row. Shotaro looked around and realized he was supposed to do the same. Seunghan had a shirt around his arm and by the way Wonbin was holding him - with his shirt around his neck like a scarf - they were both injured. 

Shotaro rowed, finally, but he also looked up, even while terrified by the view. The fire was consuming the ship furiously and he could only see a couple of rowing boats in the water. They had almost thirty men in their crew, it was clear that not everybody would be able to leave the ship safely. 

He looked at the boys with him and, for the seas, they were exactly that, boys, none of them being near twenty yet. Sungchan was rowing and crying and the other two were glued to each other, shaking. 

Something hit the boat slightly and to their horror, it was a body in the water. Shotaro gulped, throat dry from smoke and pain. 

“Look at me, Sungchannie. Just row," he said with a sweet voice. “We’re fine. Just row.” 

Sungchan opened his mouth and said--

“Taro, wake up!” 

.

.

.

Shotaro opens his eyes slowly. The room is bright and he can smell something frying, but not meat. Not human flesh, this time. 

He sits up, stretches and rubs his eyes. It’s still the new fancy boat room, with all the trinkets, fake art and cute maroon curtains; it was just a nightmare.  

He turns to the door. 

“Are you awake?” Sungchan asks, holding a very calculated smile through the words. 

“I guess so.” Shotaro smiles. Something is coming, he knows. 

“Great.” Sungchan walks in, his heavy boots thump-thumping on the wooden floor. He opens the curtains and the whole room is illuminated. 

Shotaro groans, hands moving absently to where he keeps his clothes folded. 

“I’ve great news,” the quartermaster announces. “Seunghan has just spotted a half destroyed ship near us!”

Shotaro frowns. He stands up and starts wearing his pants. 

“Signs of attack?” 

“Not much. Maybe a couple of round shots, but the bridge is done, almost none left, and some parts of the deck seem damaged. I guess they exploded something. It looks like an accident…” 

Shotaro stops with his shirt right over his head. 

“An explosion? Is it sinking?” 

“No, and I don’t think it will sink on its own.” Sungchan claps excitedly, his eyes turning into crescent moons. “The hull is intact, it is sailing somehow. Seunghan has been tracking it and he has not seen a single soul there.”

Shotaro sits on the bed again to wear his boots. 

“Well, it’s a trap or a haunted ship. Both ways I think we should sail away from it.” 

Sungchan’s smile dissolves on his face and he hits one of Shotaro’s wooden statues when he crosses his arms. 

“That’s no such a thing as a haunted ship! Stop saying nonsense, Shotaro.” 

Shotaro looks up. 

“I mean, Captain.” Sungchan gulps. “Please, hyung, let’s take a look!” 

Shotaro hates to be the pragmatic one. He really does. 

“We’re in the middle of a delivery.” He stands up and grabs his jewel box. “Also, it sounds really dangerous. This is not the time for us to loot ships, not with the boy with us.” 

Sungchan is now fully pouting. 

“It’s because of him, hyung! Poor Chanyoung, he’s going to be locked in like a monk for so long. He deserves at least one fun thing before he leaves. He’s so excited about the ship!” 

Shotaro takes a deep breath. He’s so happy Sungchan found himself a friend. It’s been years of him spending time alone with his books while Wonbin, Seunghan and Sohee play music and Shotaro admires his art pieces and his collections. He’s not a loner, but no one there is educated enough to be too close to him as he wanted them to (Shotaro isn’t even sure if Sohee knows how to read. He says he knows the songs he sings by heart). Now, with a noble in the boat, he truly found his new best mate. The problem is that he has lost his usual prudence. 

“His father paid us to deliver him to University City on time for his exams,” Shotaro says patiently. “We are not here to entertain him, especially when it’s such a dangerous and unnecessary quest.” 

Sungchan whines. 

“I’m so ti-tiii-tired of y-you.” 

It doesn’t sting anymore. A few solar returns ago, Shotaro became the captain, and since then, their strong bond has changed. Sungchan wants to hurt him now, which he understands. Both men are hurt after all they went through. 

The quartermaster leaves the room and Shotaro puts on his earrings, rings and necklace. Before he puts the jacket on, he gets his gun, knife and sword. There’s some space left, so a tiny bottle of water gets in as well.

Small steps. Shotaro looks back and there’s a cat on his bed. 

“Oh, hello, Bini.” Shotaro smiles. 

“What did you say to him?” Wonbin walks in and sits on the bed next to his pet. The black cat stretches and gets closer to his tutor. 

“No, of course.” 

“Ah. That explains it.” 

Shotaro stares at the cook, eyes on his clean apron. 

“I thought we had enough here. What do they want in that boat?” 

“Just some fun,” Wonbin says absently. His shirt has a few holes between the blue and purple stripes; his necklace is shining and his hair is combed. 

“We could have fun when we reach the land.”

Wonbin stands, leaving the cat in the bed and approaches Shotaro silently. He pretends to be entertained by the collection of perfumes (stolen, looted and gifted) but his mind is elsewhere. 

“What?” The Captain asks. 

“It’ll take a month to get there and University City sucks. Do you know all the professors are priests ? Alcohol is illegal there.”

“You know I don’t know that. The fuck do I know about this land?”

Shotaro is a foreigner on land but the sea knows no countries. 

“I’m just saying we won’t have any other opportunity like this one.” 

“There may be pirate ships around.” 

“This can be a fancy ship for fancy people… but there’s no retired pirate here.” Wonbin shrugs. “ They should be afraid of us.” 

That convinces Shotaro. He sighs and grabs his hat. Wonbin stops him for a second and takes a scarf he keeps in his pocket; the Captain bows slightly and the cook ties it around his superior’s head to avoid hair falling on his eyes. 

Shotaro puts his hat on the scarf and walks out of his room. He reaches the deck in a minute and stomps three times on the wooden floor to draw the attention of the men there. 

“I’ll go first,” he announces. “Sungchan can take the boy after I’m sure everything is clear.” 

Seunghan is on the bridge ladder. 

“How about me?” 

“You stay with Wonbin and Sohee.” Shotaro looks up, protecting his eyes from the sun with a hand. “You know what you have to do if we find some trouble.” 

Sungchan is radiant, clapping excitedly again. His raggy black shirt is too small and shows his belly button when he raises his arms while celebrating.

“Get a jacket, your guns and a gun for the boy,” Shotaro orders. “I know you know how to shoot, Chanyoung.” 

“I hope I don’t have to,” Chanyoung says, resigned. 

He’s so tall and strong but anyone can see he’s not a fighter. It’s been a few months since this whole thing started, since Shotaro went to get the crew more guns and tools and Jimin told him about a client. This nobleman wants to send his son to University City, but the roads are too dangerous right now. It’d be better if he sailed, in a much shorter time, but the sea is dangerous too. 

He knew she wanted him to offer his services. However, the crew had never delivered a person before. Since they took a boat for working purposes, they only delivered money, treasure, casual belongings and messages. Some people didn’t want to hire them because they used to be pirates, which made them try to hide it as much as possible. Surprisingly, the nobleman loved to know about their criminal past. He said his son was well trained and a great swimmer, but lacked violence and anger. Chanyoung is too sweet and that’s why he wants to be a doctor. He needs people like you to protect him.

Chanyoung’s father paid the half they charged beforehand with a whole ship. A nice ship with a water supply, baths, kitchen, individual rooms with bunkers and even a library. With that, Shotaro could shave his face every single day . He was almost losing his pirate essence. 

He puts the boats on the water and decides not to wait for the other two. He simply starts rowing - the ship is too visible. It isn’t a big one, but it’s hard to miss a ship with the top half almost completely destroyed. Sungchan was right. Someone exploded the cabin. The mast was broken into several pieces and a few holes indicated there was a fight, but it is, at this point, empty and adrift. 

The sight sends chills down Shotaro’s spine. 

Fire. 

The captain shook his head. This is not the same situation; this is clearly not a pirate ship, but probably a private ship for pleasure and parties. Those are the best to loot; Shotaro can find perfumes, jewelry, clothes and even maybe art pieces to add to his collection. 

Approaching the ship is the most difficult part, but when he’s near, Shotaro sees that what’s left of the boarding ladder is still good - he can climb the rest by himself using a climbing line. He looks back and sees the boat with the other two men behind them. The sea is clear - no other ships in sight. 

Shotaro struggles to get on deck a little bit, but he luckily avoids any broken parts. When he stands on the - what’s left of - deck, he stares at a nightmarish view. Holes on the floor show the destruction inside the suites. There are bodies and blood everywhere - well, bodies is a strong word. Parts of bodies. On the deck and the whole where the cabin was, only a strange black dust. 

He turns back and screams at the boat that is approaching the ship. 

“Be careful when you step! The structure is damaged here.” 

Someone coughs. 

Shotaro reaches for his gun and stares at the black dust, investigating each hand, leg, head and unidentified human remains. 

“Who’s there?” He asks gently. “Help has arrived.” 

“Don’t lie to me. I know a pirate when I see one,” the hoarse voice says. 

Shotaro walks to the sound of the voice carefully, avoiding cracks in the floor and he covers his nose. The smell of rotting flesh is disgusting under the strong sun. 

He can’t believe his eyes when he realizes a half-body is talking to him.

It looks like a man, beard and all, but it’s hard to say when he’s covered in black dust and surrounded by bodies. 

“For the seas. The hell has happened to you, my friend?” 

The man has no legs or arms. He’s just a torso with a head. His eyes, however, are lively. 

“Magic dust.” 

Shotaro kneels to take a better look at him. It’s even worse.

“Did they do this on purpose?” 

“No,” the man says. “Nobody knew what was inside of the box. We---we came first--we took the ship. But one of the treasures was a bomb inside of a beautiful gold box. It was fast--” 

The man coughs. Shotaro now can see his pierced ears. 

“Where is your ship?” 

“When it exploded, they left. The ones who lived... They didn’t even take anything with them, they just ran away. Captain turned into black dust. As you can see, I can’t do the same.” 

They snort together. It’s such a terrible situation, but mutilation, death and blood is just natural to a pirate. 

Shotaro hears a noise and turns back. It’s Sungchan falling on the deck. 

“Are there any survivors besides you?” Shotaro asks the pirate, eyes on his crew. 

“I barely survived. At this point, I’m not sure how the boat has not sunk yet.” The pirate coughs blood this time. 

Chanyoung and Sungchan walk to them, looking at their steps, hand in hand. Chanyoung looks disgusted by the smell, but he approaches the pirate anyway. 

“No one?” Sungchan asks Shotaro. 

“Just this friend.” Shotaro points. “Can he survive, Chanyoung?” 

The boy examines the body, clearly shifting into his doctor mode and no longer bothered by the smell. His large, kind eyes scrutinize the scene while he refrains from touching anything. 

“No, not a single chance without medication and a few immediate surgeries. The explosion destroyed his limbs and somehow cauterized them, which is what is keeping him alive,” it's his diagnosis. “The infection will take over his body soon, and I imagine that the lack of feeding, water and proper treatment made it much worse. But I can put him down painlessly.” 

“I'd like to sink with the ship. I’m a man of the sea.” The man replies, now deeply calm. Death is nothing but inevitable. 

“It won’t sink. Also, covered in blood the way you are, the sharks will eat you as soon as you hit the water,” Sungchan says. “The better option is for Chanyoung to end your life here.”

“That’s fine if they eat me,” the pirate says. “At least I’m useful. Kill me and throw me in the water, please.” 

“Before you do it,” Shotaro interrupts. “Would you like us to do something in your name, friend? Tell your crew or any family--” 

“No, I’ve got no family, just the sea name my brothers gave me,” the pirate says. “But thank you.” 

Shotaro nods to Chanyoung. The boy holds the man’s face firmly and, in a fast movement, breaks his neck. Both Sungchan and Shotaro avert their eyes in respect. 

“I’ll look for valuables inside,” Shotaro says. 

“We can look from here. It’s a big pretty hole they made.” Sungchan frowns. 

“I think there is a cabin underneath this one.” Shotaro squats, pointing to the damage. “At least it won’t be covered by this weird dust.” 

“Did the guy say what was that?” 

Behind them, Chanyoung respectfully moves the body to throw it in the water. 

“Magic.” Shotaro grins. 

“You’re lying.” 

“I’m not. I swear on the sea goddesses.” 

Sungchan bites his nails, anxious. He loves a good fight and he’s not scared of men, but magic and spirits terrify him. 

Shotaro decides to look for the stairs and it’s not as destroyed as the rest of the ship. The first level down the deck was a small atrium and had little left but the remains of a table and decoration. The paintings are covered by blood and black dust and the plates and cutlery are broken into pieces. High heels and wigs are on the floor and it makes Shotaro gulps. It was a party. 

Those people weren’t murdered by normal weapons. They were blown. 

He looks around for the entry to the cabins, but he realizes there is only one. And it’s destroyed and empty. Inside of it, some things are… in good condition. Or at least they can be fixed. Books, paintings, bedsheets and pillows. There’s a hole caused by a cannonball. The captain walks to it and then looks back. Whoever attacked the ship had shot the cabins first, hoping everyone inside evacuated to the deck. They did it and there was an explosion. 

Shotaro leaves the cabin and takes the stairs again, now down to a very dark level. He takes a candle and goes back to the deck for a minute. Everything looks normal but the dying pirate is no longer there. 

“I need a real bright light. Also, there is good stuff inside.” 

“Go get it,” Sungchan says to Chanyoung. “I need to stay here.” 

The poor boy is shaking when he gives Shotaro his fancy tool that shines a flame with a metal ignition. Shotaro is happy he’ll be able to use it, after all. 

“You don’t need this to see in the cabin. There are holes everywhere,” Shotaro explains. “But I’m going down.”

“Alone?” 

Shotaro smiles. 

“Yes. If you hear a scream or a fight, run to the deck and leave.”

Chanyoung nods frantically. Shotaro now can clearly see the stairs that lead to what he believes are the stores. He raises the light tool with one hand and holds his gun with the other. He sees barrels and sacks, probably with food, though he’s not sure if it’s still good to eat. Maybe there’s some fruit - Wonbin always begs for fruits. Shotaro moves a few sacks, kicks some barrels and steps on what he guesses is a box, but it’s a handle made of metal. 

He squats and lowers the light to see it better. It’s a trapdoor. He smiles. More supplies? 

It’s very heavy and the fruits are sprawled on the top of it, so he takes a while to open it. Before he goes down, he lowers his hand to illuminate the small store, praying there will be no rats there to jump on him. 

He sees something. 

The light shows… a face. A face covered by a hand.

“Hell,” Shotaro mutters. 

“Who are you?” The voice asks. 

Shotaro jumps, standing again, startled. The person crawls up, leaving the store behind. Shotaro points his gun and the light in that direction while the person sits on the floor. 

It's a man, dressed in kitchen clothes and an apron. He looks up and stares at Shotaro. 

“Well.” The man sighs. “A pirate.” 

“I’m not the one who exploded this ship.” Shotaro inspects the man closer, gun still raised to the stranger’s face. “I’m not even a pirate anymore.” 

The man processes that information in silence for a few seconds. 

“Oh. Then why are you here?”

“You first.”

“Why?”

“I have a gun.” Shotaro shrugs in the dark. 

“Well, that’s a good argument.” The stranger moves, dusting off his clothes. “I cook for Lady Kim. She’s probably dead, I think. I came down to get more wheat since her guests were devouring cakes like they had no dinner before it.”

The man makes a sound. Boooooom!

Shotaro waits for the rest. 

“And…?”

“I don’t know. It’s been two nights, I suppose. I couldn’t open the trapdoor.” 

“You didn’t realize your ship was being attacked? I’m sure there were screams.”

“Not my ship. I was hired for the party. And, no, I didn't realize it. They were always screaming. I’m paid to cook, not to pay attention.”

Shotaro nods. Servants are better safe deaf and blind when it comes to their ladies and lords. 

“Get up.” Shotaro orders. “Can you? Are you hurt?” 

“Not really.” 

Shotaro walks closer to the stranger. He’s tall, about Shotaro’s height, and seems well-built but not very strong. When the light hits the man’s face, he squints his eyes. 

Now that’s a beautiful face. 

“Hm.” Shotaro laughs, nervous. “What’s your name, friend?” 

“Eunseok.” He says simply, sounding very calm. “Could I search for some water? I’m slightly dehydrated.” 

Shotaro takes his pocket bottle and pushes it against Eunseok’s chest. The cook takes it and his dusty fingers brush the captain’s. 

“Thank you. There’s water here somewhere, you know.” 

“We can’t stay long.” Shotaro looks up. “Chanyoung, come here!” 

The boy's loud steps are heard all the way down. He doesn’t enter the store, though, remaining on the stairs. 

“Tell Sungchan we got food and supplies here, even fruits. We have to be quick.”

“Okay.” Chanyoung stares. “How about this guy? Please, tell me it’s a person and not a ghost.” 

Eunseok is drinking water peacefully. 

“It’s a man. He’s coming with me. Unharmed--he’s a crew member--”

“Staff,” Eunseok explains. 

“Whatever.” Shotaro moves the gun, gesturing to Eunseok to move. “Hands up, three steps away, friend. Try no prank.”

Eunseok doesn’t answer, complying very quickly. He’s still holding Shotaro’s bottle. As they climb the stairs, the cook looks around with big eyes, face twisting with repulsion. Yet he doesn’t seem sad or very shocked by it. 

He’s welcomed into the deck by Sungchan’s gun. 

“Sohee is coming to get the sacks. Who’s this?” 

Shotaro pokes Eunseok with his gun.

“Song Eunseok. Lady Kim’s cook for the wedding.” He introduces himself quickly. 

“He was trapped in the supply store,” Shotaro explains. “Probably for the past two days.” 

Sungchan frowns, lowering his gun as he realizes that Eunseok is unharmed and doesn’t look like a seaman or a fighter. Shotaro puts his gun in his pants and grabs a piece of rope on the floor, just in case he has to choke someone.

“You’re lucky,” Sungchan concludes. “Do you know how to row?” 

“It can’t be very difficult,” Eunseok answers, but his eyes are following Shotaro as the Captain holds the rope. “Who are you?” 

“We offer delivery services,” Sungchan says. “As I said, you’re very lucky you were on your way. We’ll put you in one of the boats, friend. Don’t worry.” 

Chanyoung is helping Sohee to move from one ship to the other. While they’re getting the supplies, Sungchan is paying attention to their surroundings and Eunseok sits down on a clean spot on the floor. Shotaro is impressed by how calm and compliant he is. He’s probably not lying about his identity; his skin shows no scars and he looks naturally tan, not suntanned by sea life. No earrings, no guns, not even a pocket knife…

“Your bottle.” Eunseok lifts it and shakes it to show it’s empty. 

Shotaro takes it and attaches it to his belt. 

“What’s your name?” Eunseok inquires, suddenly, eyeing Shotaro from head to toe. 

“I’m Shotaro, he’s Sungchan and the boys are Sohee and Chanyoung.” 

“Chanyoung? Lee?” Eunseok frowns. “Oh. Yes, he’s familiar. He grew up well.” 

Sungchan takes his gun again, startled. 

“How do you know that?” 

“His father is a merchant and his mother is a patroness, they’re very famous in the Capital City,” Eunseok explains. “I saw them in the church many years ago--I was a child too.” 

Sungchan frowns and it’s because it’s the truth. Shotaro knows it’s because the quartermaster was also someone who once lived in the Capital City and frequented the church. 

“You’re not a seaman,” Sungchan says. 

“Not really. But I know how to swim if I have to.” He again glances at Shotaro.

Shotaro should be helping the boys with the supplies but he can’t take his eyes off Eunseok. He’s indeed beautiful and has the softest voice; had he been in the water, Shotaro would mistake him for a siren. 

“Hey,” he draws the cook's attention. “Do you feel strong enough to help the boys? They don’t know food, they may be getting rotting stuff. You know the ship, so.” 

Sungchan stares at him. 

“Yeah.” Eunseok nods, standing. 

As the man leaves, the quartermaster approaches his Captain.

“The fuck you’re giving him tasks for? We don’t know this guy.”

Shotaro laughs, nervous. 

“I don’t know. I think we should keep him.” 

Sungchan doesn’t react initially, as if he’s not sure if this is a joke. 

“You’re serious?” 

“Yeah.”

“We have a cook. Two, since Sohee can cook too.” 

“He can be of use. He’s a healthy guy. Servants know stuff.” 

Their voices are low and the sounds of the sea are keeping the conversation a secret. Sungchan is still on the lookout, but he glances at Shotaro as he speaks.

“We don’t even know if he’s really a servant. He may be lying. He may be the reason this boat exploded. He could've blown those people himself.” 

“Ah. That’s not--”

“How is everyone dead and burned and he doesn’t have a single scratch?” 

“He was trapped in the store. I had to help him out.” 

“That could be a lie.” 

“How does a man trap himself like that? He’s not lying. And he’s not a pirate or a noble, anyone can see it.” 

The boys come to the deck carrying boxes and Eunseok is with them, holding bottles. The two armed men wait until the others go on the task of putting it all in a boat. 

“I’ll go with the first load,” Sohee announces. 

Sungchan and Shotaro nod, going back to their whispering fight. 

“You said that coming here was dangerous and now you want to get a whole stranger on our ship?” 

“What’s the other option? It’s a long way to get to the Capital City and he may find some friendly ships but we know this sea is infected with pirates.” 

“He’s not our problem.” Sungchan sighs loudly and then smiles at Chanyoung and Eunseok when they look at him. Except Eunseok is looking at Shotaro , though expressionlessly.

“He is lucky we’re not pirates anymore and we don’t want any trouble. Otherwise, he would’ve been murdered on the spot,” Sungchan whispers. “Just give me one good reason to keep this guy.” 

Shotaro looks down. 

“He’s nice to look at.” 

Sungchan stops looking at the surroundings and focuses on Shotaro, mouth hanging open. Shotaro doesn’t know what to do. It's the truth, after all. He wouldn’t lie to his best mate. 

“I didn’t expect this from you .” Sungchan recomposes himself, back to his duty. “He’s a person, not some nice thing you put in your collection.” 

Silence takes over - besides the common sound of the sea. Wonbin is waiting for Sohee in their ship and now they’re the closest two ships can get without the risk of a collision. At this point, the smell of decomposing bodies and smoke no longer bothers them. It’s easy to adjust. 

“If you wanna keep him and if he agrees with it then I guess it’s fine,” Sungchan gives in. “But we’re no longer pirates. You can’t kidnap a guy just because you’re lonely.” 

Shotaro feels ashamed of himself. All those years he made sure of being such a perfect image of a Captain. Daring, yes, but never careless. He kept their business clean and kept their strong word too, building a respectable name for his crew. And when they went to any city, he never drank too much or slept around. He also never asked his crew for help or treated them like anything but little brothers. He only asked favors from his other friends, but mostly he was the one doing favors. 

 He didn’t know they knew he was lonely. 

“It’s the best for him,” Shotaro argues.

“You saved him one time. And I didn’t kill him too. Counting not being blown into little pieces, this man is the luckiest guy around,” Sungchan complains. “Maybe if he gets into a boat, he’ll find a nice ship to take him home.”

Eunseok is standing on the deck with Chanyoung. They’re talking and Chanyoung is smiling. 

“Hey, you, what’s his name--Eunseok,” Sungchan calls him. “Come here.” 

Eunseok doesn’t say anything but approaches them with a small smile. 

“We’re going to University City… which is the opposite route from Capital City,” Sungchan says seriously. “We’ll drop Chanyoung there. We’re not planning to go to Capital City so soon.” 

Shotaro sighs. He’s not even trying. 

“You could come with us,” Shotaro intervenes. “We can drop you there--in the nearest city. It’s safer than being alone in the ocean… even with water and food, it’s not an easy job to be found or to find a shore nearby.” 

Sungchan rolls his eyes back, annoyed. Eunseok just stares at Shotaro and he seems deeply unbothered, as if the thought of death hasn’t even crossed his mind yet. 

“What’s the price for that?” He finally inquires. 

That surprises both of them. 

“I’m a commoner. I don’t want debts with pirates,” Eunseok says simply. 

“We’re not pirates,” Shotaro explains again. 

“Well.” Sungchan snorts dryly. “Shotaro does want you to be his bitch.” 

Shotaro kicks him in the leg immediately and Sungchan bends, whining like a child. It’s not playful - it’s Sungchan’s bad leg. The Captain refrains from physical punishment but sometimes it’s needed. 

“Oh.” Eunseok mumbles. “Then it’s fine.” 

“What?” Shotaro gasps. “He’s joking. If--if you’re on the ship with us--you’re going to work like everyone else. It’s--it’s carrying boxes and cleaning, and… and cooking--”

“I said it’s fine,” Eunseok repeats. “I’ll go with you.” 

Sungchan is bent, holding his hurt leg, but he looks up and exchanges a confused look with his Captain. 

“It’s settled, then.” Shotaro gulps. “We have space on this ship.” 

“Fuck that,” Sungchan stands up straight, yet his face still shows signs of pain. “He’s your responsibility from now on. He’s going to be in your room and I’ll personally lock the door from the outside so if he kills you first he won’t escape and kill the rest of us.” 

“Why would I do that?” Eunseok asks sincerely. 

“Don’t listen to him. We never lock doors in our ship, it’s a rule.” Shotaro is now fully ordering. “You’re a part of the crew now. Go help the others. ” 

Eunseok nods. 

Shotaro ignores everyone else and walks carefully around the deck to see if the ship still has extra boats that weren’t destroyed. He’s used to Sungchan’s possessiveness when it comes to him and the crew. Everyone reacted differently to the loss of their original crew. Wonbin got himself a cat and became much more paranoid and quieter, despite being still talkative when happy or drunk. Seunghan was really supportive and felt like he had to be the mood maker, rarely complaining. Sungchan became possessive and his mood swings were much worse, taking him from sweet words to angry fits in a second. Shotaro turned into a captain and an older brother and sacrificed everything else. 

Shotaro finds one boat. Only one. 

“We can work with this,” he mumbles to himself.  

To leave the ship, they need to use three boats, one full of supplies and Sohee, one with Chanyoung, Sungchan and the bottles and the smaller one with Shotaro and Eunseok. 

Both men need to row in the direction of the ship as they leave. Shotaro looks up at the clear blue sky and then at the waters - there are sharks and birds of prey around, probably smelling blood. When he looks down, Eunseok is rowing, his brown eyes are no longer covered by his dark hair, and they are set on the Captain. 

“We gotta sink this ship when we leave,” Shotaro screams to Sungchan. There must be no traces left behind, no proof of any interaction or looting. 

Shotaro looks back at Eunseok. 

“Don’t you have any belongings with you?” 

“No, Captain,” Eunseok says, now slightly wet from the splashing water. He’s really not a seaman, the lack of technique denounces it.  

Shotaro has to guide Eunseok to climb the ladder, holding the man by the hips carefully.

“If you fall, you’re dinner,” he jokes. 

Eunseok isn’t afraid at all. Maybe that’s how he’s dealing with the awful situation, Shotaro thinks. Shotaro is the last one to climb the stairs and Wonbin helps him into the ship. 

“Let’s go,” Shotaro tells Seunghan as soon as he steps on the deck. 

“Can I shoot the cannon this time?” Chanyoung asks with a shy voice. 

“Well, you killed a man, you deserve a reward.” Sungchan taps him in the back loudly and then smiles happily. 

“Chanyoung killed a man?” Wonbin is shocked. “Are you serious?”

“I put him out of his misery,” Chanyoung says simply. “Soon I’ll finish my course and I will have to do it, anyway. It’s my duty as a doctor. If death is the only relief…”

Shotaro nods. 

“Yeah you’re right, go sink the ship,” the Captain says. “We have to be fast and get back on track. We can’t miss our route.” 

Seunghan is back to his spot at the helm, his wooden hand guiding the whole ship. Wonbin stares at Eunseok in silence while Chanyoung and Sungchan are like two kids with a cannon.

“We talk at the last meal,” Shotaro senses the cook’s curiosity and dismisses him. “Sohee, could you show the ship and instruct Eunseok about our rules?” 

“Okay!” Sohee nods. “This is my first time doing it!” 

Shotaro sighs. He takes off his hat and the scarf and lets the wind play with his hair. He can hear Sohee speaking as he enters the ship. First is where you go when nature calls you!

Shotaro smiles, lost in thoughts. He remembers the way they took Sohee to the ship, as he pleaded with them to escape his previous job. Singing in a pub is not good for me. Every day there’s a fight here! The Capital City was so dangerous that his sister agreed with him joining the crew. 

Shotaro doesn’t know what Capital City was like before. Many said it was safe and welcoming before the government changed the laws and enforced new taxes. Shotaro didn't even know the Capital City of his country, because he was born in a small city near the sea and left before his land closed its borders. He met a bunch of guys and walked into a ship to never return. 

He misses his original crew and their sense of family but he has to admit that pirate life was tough, poor and often too violent. 

He covers his ears before the shooting and then watches the cannonball opening a hole in the hull. It won’t be fast, the water isn’t quite reaching it yet, but it will sink eventually. He doesn’t want to see it, so he goes to his room. With the unexpected turn of events, he forgot to take some nice things to add to his collection. He takes off his boots, gun, knife and sword and sits on the bed, stretching. 

“Hmmm… Captain,” Sohee asks, knocking on the door. That’s weird. He barely calls Shotaro by any title nowadays. 

Eunseok is next to him. 

“Hm, he needs to wash himself and clean his mouth and stuff and he definitely needs some new clothes.” Sohee scratches his head. “Should I…?”

“Of course,” Shotaro answers. “Eunseok, like Chanyoung, is a member of the crew until we reach University City. You should also give him some chores. He’s a cook, so he can help in the kitchen.” 

“Understood.” Sohee smiles. He’s so happy to have a new member. Living in the sea is quite uneventful when the only goal is to get to another place, so having an addition to the group sure will bring a sense of novelty that they need. 

Eunseok is, as always, quiet. He has a heavy, deep stare that makes Shotaro weak, so the captain has no other choice but to snort his discomfort off. 

“Do you know anything about plants?” Sohee asks Eunseok as they leave. 

“Yes. I had a garden,” Eunseok answers, his voice becoming more distant. 

Shotaro lies down and closes his eyes. The night before he was in charge of the helm and Sungchan didn’t allow him to sleep through the day because of the other ship. 

He falls asleep quickly, listening to the sea and his noisy crew. Both sounds give him peace, both mean home . 

He wakes up and the sky is orange; he can see it through the little window in the room. He can feel the softness of the blanket under him and the chill wind that warns everyone that the night is coming and it’s about to be cold. He sits up and stretches, feeling hungry but ready to start working. 

Shotaro turns to leave the bed and faces a whole human being next to him. He gasps in shock and then explodes in laughter when he realizes it’s Eunseok. 

The man stares at him in silence, barely moving. 

“You-you’re really good at this,” Shotaro is still giggling as he says. “I mean. Being quiet and… standing still. I barely noticed you there.” 

Shotaro looks down, watching how Eunseok placed himself in the remaining space to not push Shotaro to the corner. Now that he’s clean, it’s easy to see how beautiful he really is: his face is small and symmetrical, his hair falls on his face like a perfect frame and his body seems proportional under the soft and baggy clothes that the crew found for him.

Shotaro gulps and then looks away. 

“Did they tell you to stay here?” 

“Yes,” Eunseok answers promptly. “I helped with the plants and I cleaned the kitchen. I took a shower and got dressed. Then I was dismissed.” 

Shotaro snorts. 

“Dismissed…? We don’t work at night. It’s a small boat. You’ll get a task a day unless it’s a night watch. In this case, you may as well sleep all day long before your turn.” 

“I see. How about the meals?”

“How about them?” 

“The three meals.” 

“Hm. We just have a big one. At night.” Shotaro looks at him then regrets it, so lays down again. 

“You only eat once a day?”

“What? No. If you're hungry, just go to the kitchen and prepare yourself a snack.” 

“Anytime?” 

“Yeah. Anytime--well. If you go there and Wonbin is cooking, just ask him first. He’s a bit territorial.” 

Shotaro dares to look at the man next to him again. Eunseok’s voice is so calm. His cheeks are rosy and his eyes are so bright. 

“Didn’t Sohee explain the rules to you?” 

“He talked a lot, but nothing about the meals.” 

“Hm. You’re hungry, right?” 

Eunseok looks down. He’s barefoot and Shotaro can see that his feet are small, very pale and delicate. 

Shotaro sits up again and jumps off the bed, avoiding touching Eunseok. He chooses one of his statues - a man’s head - and opens it. With the scalp in his hands, he inspects the hollow interior and smiles. 

“Salty or sweet?” 

Eunseok blinks. 

“Sweet…?” 

Shotaro puts the scalp on the top of another sculpture and takes a red and white striped cane. He gives it to Eunseok and when the cook takes it, he fixes the head statue. 

Eunseok is now sitting, staring at the cane curiously. 

“We crossed paths with a foreign boat and exchanged a few things.” Shotaro sits on the bed again and his leg brushes Eunseok’s. “They gave us candy. Try it.” 

Eunseok looked at the captain. 

“Where were they from?” 

“I don’t know. Their language was strange. White hair and weird clothes.” Shotaro looks up, remembering. “But they were nice to us and we were nice to them.” 

“How do you know it’s not poisoned?” 

“I’ve eaten tons of their candy. I’d be dead by now.” Shotaro laughs. “It’s like. Hard sugar and peppermint.” 

Eunseok seems reluctant but he tastes it anyway. He licks it like a cat would and Shotaro can’t help but laugh at it.

“It’s very sweet,” Eunseok declares. “I can’t eat this alone.” 

He breaks the cane in half and then gives the other half to Shotaro, who takes it happily. 

“Don’t tell Wonbinnie about that.” 

“Why would I?”

“Just saying it.” Shotaro laughs again as he sees Eunseok licking it. “You have to suck it. ”

Shotaro puts the candy in his mouth and shows how it’s done. Eunseok stares at his mouth, hypnotized.

“Ah.” The cook nods, gulping. 

The two stay on the bed like that, eating candy and resting while the sun goes down. The wind is strong now, so Shotaro closes the window instinctively and then the room gets much darker than before.

“The oil lamp,” Shotaro says nervously as he remembers he’s not alone. He lights one of them, distracted, and when he looks back, Eunseok is still on the bed, staring at him calmly but also intently. 

Shotaro never had anyone in his bed before except for his crew and that was not the norm. 

“Hm.” The Captain clears his throat. “We should go. Dinner will be served soon and we have to hm… do things…” 

Eunseok is still looking at him like a painting in the dark. Shotaro hasn’t felt this kind of uneasiness in a long time; he’s often excited or entertained by scary and new situations. Now he’s paralyzed. 

“To the kitchen?” Eunseok asks gently. “I haven’t finished my candy yet. Should I hide it?” 

“No. It’ll go bad now you licked it. You can finish it.” 

“I’m full. I don’t think I’ve ever had this amount of sugar in my life.” 

“That’s why your teeth are so bright.” 

Eunseok chuckles, a soft he he he. 

“You all have nice teeth as well.” 

“We clean with coal and mint. It’s important to keep them clean so we don’t get sick.” 

Also, and this is something he was taught many years ago, they needed to look presentable in case they had to pretend that they were nobles. And, of course, to hide that they had a pirate-y past. 

Shotaro takes the rest of the candy from Eunseok’s mouth and eats it in one bite. It’s wet with the man’s hot saliva, but it’s very tasty anyway. 

Shotaro walks to the kitchen, raising the lamp high and making sure Eunseok is right beside him. Had they been in the old ship, the floor would be creaking under their feet. Now, the steps are light and almost no sound denounces their entry in the bright kitchen. They have a system of lighting, but they tend to save it for important situations and to make the oil supply last longer. 

“Hello!” Shotaro announces himself, letting his arm fall. The lamp is no longer needed in the kitchen, so he puts it on the metal shelf to keep it safe. 

Wonbin is walking around with bowls; his cauldron has boiling soup inside. On the center of the table, rice and fish, but also delicious fried potatoes with sauce. 

Sohee triumphantly puts two big bottles on the table.

“We got fresh beer.” 

There’s this chant of aaaaaa that is natural to the happy crew. The mismatched plates, chairs and kitchenware are positioned, waiting for the boys to claim them. Sungchan is facing the porthole, watching the horizon; yet, it would be weird to find a boat in their path. They’re far from the cities’ path, but not far enough to be sailing to foreign lands. Most ships they find are the ones that are lost . 

Eunseok stands by the door, unsure of what to do next. Shotaro counts the chairs and realizes they put an extra stool there. He smiles.

“Where’s the boy?” 

“Chanyoung is washing. He had blood on his clothes and skin,” Sungchan answers absently, not moving. 

Shotaro gestures to Eunseok to follow him. Sohee and Wonbin sit at the table and Wonbin looks at Shotaro and then at Eunseok. 

“Oh. Hm.” He mumbles, then looks down. “It’s you, hyung. Thank you for the advice with the plants… the soup is tasting better.” 

It takes Shotaro a moment to realize he’s not the hyung Wonbin is talking to. 

“How do you know his birthday?” Shotaro inquires. 

“Eunseok-hyung is a serpent like Sungchannie,” Sohee says casually, sitting in his designated spot. Bini is on the table, eating his dinner before everyone else, as always. While the cat munches the fish in his metal bowl, Sungchan looks over his shoulder to Eunseok and hums loudly. 

“Who’s going to replace Seunghan at the helm?” Shotaro asks. “Is it me?” 

“No, I’ll eat with him, so he won’t be alone.” Wonbin is now filling the bowl, distracted. Shotaro notices he has his kitchen cloth on his shoulder and his hair down, his usual strategy when he’s covering the burn scars on his neck. He must be shy around a new person on the ship. 

“Have you met Seunghan?” Shotaro turns to Eunseok. 

“Yes,” Eunseok says simply. “He has sharp eyes.” 

Shotaro snorts. It’s true, Seunghan has sharp eyes and a pretty smile, but the first thing people notice about him is the wooden arm. 

Chanyoung walks in, wearing his less formal clothes that still are very bright and clear and Shotaro always feels for his naiveté and at the same time, can’t picture the boy wearing their purposedly dark and old clothes even in the boat. 

“I’m sorry.” He bows, heading to his chair. 

Sungchan leaves the porthole and Shotaro gets the clue to sit next to the stool. 

They’re all waiting for Shotaro to say something. It’s one of their rituals, something that they know they must respect. Even in the sea, there are rules, rituals and traditions. 

“Eunseok.” Shotaro taps the stool, inviting the newbie. “Come pray with us.” 

As Eunseok sits next to him, the table is almost full. Seunghan’s spot is empty, but he’ll also pray before eating. 

“Have you prayed before? Do you have gods?” Shotaro asks gently, his eyes on Eunseok’s seriousness, gazing at the table and not staring at his new mates. 

“I don’t have meals like this, but I pray before I sleep,” Eunseok says. “I was raised in the church.”

“Great,” Shotaro assures him. “You pray any way you want, okay? Sungchannie also was baptized. Let’s thank our gods for the meal.”

They close their eyes. Shotaro holds Eunseok’s wrist as he prays to the sea gods and goddesses and thanks them for surviving another day and having a nice meal with his mates. 

As the captain, he serves himself first and then fills everyone’s bowls. Sohee pours beer into the cups to help him. Wonbin excuses himself and leaves, carrying his and Seunghan’s bowls. 

The first bowl is always silent since they’re hungry. Sungchan finishes his first and stares at Eunseok. 

“Hm. I guess you should say something about yourself or what happened, right?” 

Eunseok glances at Shotaro quickly and nods. His bowl is still half full. He’s a slow eater. 

“My name is Song Eunseok. I’m a cook and I’ve been working in Lady Kim’s kitchen since I was a child. My mom and my dad are also servants at their house.” He bows slightly. “I was taken from the kitchen to work in her youngest daughter’s wedding at the sea. We all travelled to Bay City before getting to the ship and It was supposed to be a seven-day party, but apparently, we were attacked at some point.” 

“Lady Kim of Capital City? I didn’t know her daughter was getting married,” Chanyoung thinks aloud. “I heard the kid moved to Bay City to become a nun.” 

“She was with child.” Eunseok sighs. “It was a rushed wedding.” 

They all seem surprised. Eunseok shrugs. 

“They’re all dead now, so.” Eunseok takes the beer and sips it. Based on the face he makes, it isn’t his kind of drink.

“Hm. You don’t seem very sad about it,” Sungchan says in a very skeptical tone and while he drinks his beer, his eyes are on Eunseok. 

“I’m not happy they died,” Eunseok is calm. “But it means I can start a new life elsewhere. It’s hard to live as a servant and now no one knows I survived. I can live a free life away from the city.” 

Shotaro frowns. 

“So you don’t want to return to Capital City?” 

“Yes, I don’t wish to return,” Eunseok answers. “Any other place is good.” 

“Are you sure?” Sohee raises an eyebrow, concerned. “At least as a servant, you have a place to sleep and some food until you die. You can even marry and have children and they’ll go to school.” 

“I don’t wish to marry,” Eunseok says. 

Sungchan is still not convinced. 

“I’ve met Lady Kim. She was one of the richest ladies in the country. It’s kind of weird that her boat was attacked and only a servant survived…” He shakes his beer and then stares at the cook. Shotaro isn’t sure if Sungchan is trying to intimidate the man or just testing him. 

“The world is full of weird happenings.” Eunseok has a rice cake in his hands and he seems completely unaffected. “We were told that the entire Jung family died at the sea and here you are.” 

A brutal silence falls on the kitchen, heavy, almost solid. Sungchan widens his eyes, speechless. Shotaro tenses, getting ready to stop them from physically fighting. Sohee tries to touch Sungchan, but the quartermaster stands and storms out of the room without a word. 

“I’ll talk to him.” Shotaro calms them down, standing too. “Please finish your meals. I’ll be back soon.”

Shotaro feels a hand around his wrist. It’s Eunseok.

“Did I say something inappropriate?” 

Shotaro sighs. 

“It’s more complex than that. We’ll talk later.” 

Eunseok lets his hand go slowly, his fingers brushing Shotaro’s as if he’s hesitant. The Captain takes the lamp and goes upstairs, knowing exactly Sungchan likes to be when he’s upset. It’s possible to hear Wonbin and Seunghan talking because this ship is so much smaller than the ones they used to sail before, but Sungchan is near the bow, sprawled on the floor, looking at the stars. 

Shotaro stands next to him. The younger man is sobbing quietly. 

“Can I be here with you?” Shotaro tries. 

Sungchan sniffs loudly, turning his body to the side in a fetal position. 

Shotaro sits on the floor next to him and holds his own knees like a child. It’s windy and quiet, and when they were younger they used to be always around the helm or on the lookout, so they’re used to it. The moon is not full yet, but it’s big and bright, making the lamp next to Shotaro look like a useless tool.

They stay in silence for a moment, which is weird. Both men are usually talkative and loud. after a moment, Shotaro moves closer and lets his body fall next to his mate. 

“Let’s go back. Your soup will get cold,” Shotaro starts, measuring his tone. 

“No,” Sungchan says simply.

Shotaro reaches for his arm, but Sungchan refuses his touch. 

“Please.” 

“No.”

“Sungchan, it’s an order.” 

“Then what if I don’t want to? What are you going to do? Kick my leg again?” 

Guilt stings Shotaro like a poisonous animal. He gets closer to his mate and engulfs him in a tight hug. 

“I’m sorry about that.” 

Sungchan keeps sniffing. His big body is cold and poorly protected against the night wind. 

“You’ve been mean to me.” 

“You’ve been saying terrible things to me too. I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve that.” Shotaro scolds him. “The same thing happened just now. You were mean to him and when he defended himself, you were mad.” 

Sungchan wipes his face angrily. 

“What did this guy do to you that you’ve barely met him and you’re on his side like that?” He whines. “You don’t even know him.” 

“I’m not on his side. I’m being fair and you’re not,” Shotaro argues. “I know you’re being protective, but remember that he deserves our kindness. We’re not pirates anymore and he has gone through a terrible situation--” 

“You just want to get in his pants!” 

“Sungchan.” 

He sniffs again. Shotaro sighs. 

“Give me a hug.” 

Shotaro pulls him closer and rests his chin on Sungchan’s long shoulder, their ears touching. They used to sleep like that when they were pirates. The crew found it adorable. 

Sungchan doesn’t reciprocate the hug but he puts his big hand over Shotaro’s, holding it. 

“I’m sorry,” Sungchan whispers. 

Shotaro knows that the ghost of grief takes many forms, but he’s afraid that they’ve been spending too long on the ship. They haven’t landed since they embarked Chanyoung and sailing nonstop in the sea is maddening, everyone knows. It’s not a long journey, but it’s the longest they’ve been away from land since they were pirates. 

Maybe they should stop somewhere and relax a little bit. Isolation is making them all lose their minds. 

“Oh, am I missing some cuddle time?” Seunghan’s voice is a warning but it’s too late; in a second he’s falling on them. 

He’s holding bowls and they make a loud noise as they hit the floor. Sungchan laughs, anyway, holding the younger man in his arms. Shotaro moves to try to hold both of them and ends on the top of the human pile. 

It’s nice to be like this. It reminds them that they are safe and together. 

“Did Wonbinnie give you a break from the helm?” Shotaro asks. 

“Yes. It’s his turn tonight.” Seunghan smiles, rubbing his face on Sungchan’s shirt. 

“Do you want to take a nap with hyung?” The quartermaster asks sweetly. Shotaro feels their affection all over his body washing his anxiousness like a strong wave. 

“Give me the bowls.” Shotaro extends his hand. “I’ll take them. I’ll check on Wonbinnie later.” 

Shotaro takes the lamp and the bowls, stepping on the wooden floor with no worries left. He knows what’s bothering his crew and he knows how to fix it. They need a break. 

Shotaro gets to the kitchen and finds the atmosphere completely different. The three men are talking and laughing in front of their empty bowls. Bini is calmly being petted by Eunseok, who now looks way more comfortable. 

“Hello,” Shotaro says, walking in. He puts the bowls in the sink and stretches casually, eyes on the newbie. 

“Hey, hyung, tell me, why did we ban Bini from going on the deck again?” Sohee asks. 

“He was killing birds.” Shotaro goes back to his now cold bowl. Except it’s not cold somehow. 

“Has he ever fallen off the ship?” Chanyoung is curious. 

“No, of course not. Bini is very smart.” Shotaro answers between slurps. 

The cat is purring loudly as Eunseok's fingers rub his chin. His touch is so gentle, Shotaro thinks and then looks at his own bowl in shame. 

“Should I apologize to Sungchan?” Eunseok asks, his voice almost a whisper. 

“Not yet,” Shotaro says, sighing. “Soon. We’ll talk later.” 

He gives the newbie a reassuring look, then turns to the other crew members. 

“Who’s going to stay with Wonbin tonight?” 

“Me.” Chanyoung raises his hand like a student would. “It’s my first time at the helm and on watchout!” 

“Why are you so excited for… it so boring.” Sohee frowns. 

“Let him have fun. I’ll check on you guys later.” Shotaro drinks the rest of the soup and wipes his mouth happily. He eats some rice cakes fast, but he saves a few for Sungchan and Seunghan, making sure they get potatoes too. 

At night, before he goes to bed, he has to check the entire ship. He goes downstairs and looks for any problems, leakings or any infestation of sorts. He goes to the members’ room to make sure their lamps are safe and the light is off and finally to the deck to give snacks to whoever is in charge of the helm. 

Tonight he finds Wonbin there, staring casually at a map with directions. It’s not needed, since they’re not going that far - if they were fast and careless like they do when it’s a simple delivery, this trip would be over in a couple of weeks. But since they’re dodging dangerous waters and certain places, it’s over a month already and there’s probably a month to go (especially considering they’ll take the longest route). Yet, on land, it would be way more dangerous and longer, having to face mountains and rivers, besides the bandits and the hiding threats. 

He approaches Wonbin with care, hands on his arms gently in a back hug they’re both used to. 

“It’s cold,” Shotaro says. “I’ll get you a coat.” 

“I’m fine.” Wonbin doesn’t take his eyes off the ocean. “I like it.”

He likes to be in charge of the helm at night when it’s calm, but Shotaro knows him too well. 

“What are you worrying about?” 

Wonbin looks over his shoulders. 

“Chanyoung leaving.” 

“Why? Isn’t it our goal?” 

“It’ll be sad,” the cook answers simply. 

Shotaro nods, hugging him closer. 

“He’s a good boy… we’ll have some time to spend together, though. I was thinking about stopping at some city before we reach our destination.”

Wonbin hums and Shotaro can feel the vibration too.

“If we keep going, we will miss the best places.” He glances at the map, but it's just a reflex. “I think we should turn and go to a trading city. If we approach deep waters now, we’ll extend this trip even longer by water and honestly, it’s getting infuriating to spend so long in such a short distance.”

“It is much safer,” Shotaro mumbles absently, thinking. “Where do we have friends to welcome us?” 

“The closest friendly spot would be Port City. It is full of foreign ships, so no one will mind us.” 

“How long until there?” 

“If we go fast, a couple of days.” 

“We’re not supposed to rush.” 

“Less than a week, then.” 

“I’ll ask Chanyoung to help me with the sails,” Shotaro warns. “Be careful, we don’t want to be seen.” 

Wonbin nods, facing the ocean. Shotaro is smiling, feeling full of love somehow. The younger man turns to him.

“What?” 

“Nothing. Your hair is so long now.” 

“Ah.” He looks away. “Does it look weird?” 

“Not really. It makes you look like a girl.” 

“Shut up.” 

Shotaro laughs, his usual response. He’s about to leave when Wonbin asks, 

“Hm. How about that guy.”

Shotaro holds a line, feeling the waves slightly more violent now they’re turning; smaller boats are more susceptible to instability. 

“What guy?”

“Eunseok. The man from the empty boat.” 

“What about him?” 

“Is he going to stay?” 

“He says he wants to start a new life. He’ll probably leave when we dock at Port City.” 

“Should we keep an eye on him?” 

“He doesn’t seem dangerous, but, hm. You may.” Shotaro gives up on leaving immediately and leans on the side, crossing his arms against the wind. “Did he give you a bad feeling?”

“No. He was quite useful today. He probably saved that half-dead garden… we’ll see.” 

“Then why are you asking?” 

“Because I’m not sure why you brought him in.” 

Shotaro looks up, his hair dancing with the wind. Water drops hit him occasionally, but he’s used to it. 

“To be honest, I’m not sure myself. I just felt I had to.” 

There’s a long moment of silence between them. Wonbin has both hands on the helm and he is focused. 

“Hyung said he would warm your bed.” 

“Did you believe him?” Shotaro sighs, tired. “Have you seen me do anything like that before?” 

“No, of course not,” Wonbin is quick to answer. “But I have eyes. And so do you.” 

Shotaro moves uncomfortably and scratches his head. 

“I told him Eunseok is nice to look at, which is not a lie,” he confesses. “It was better than trying to convince him to help a poor man lost in the sea. His heart used to be much softer, now--”

“He’s trying to protect us,” Wonbin says simply. 

“I know.”

Shotaro looks down at his own boots. He has to call Chanyoung, but at the same time, he also feels like no one can understand him as Wonbin does. The opposite is also true. 

“Do you think I should have left Eunseok there?” 

“Of course not, I’m not heartless. I’d do the same.” Wonbin glares, just a judging glance. “But maybe you should have found another excuse. You’ve been refusing his affections for so long and now you just picked a man in the sea and brought him to our ship because you think he’s pretty. Had you laid with a random prostitute, Hyung wouldn’t be this upset.” 

Shotaro turns to face the sea. 

“He knows no one here must be--we’re a family. We’ll always be equal mates and share everything. All of us. There is no different bond. Besides, he has taken many lovers on land. It’s not like he’s waiting for me.” 

It wasn’t like this at the pirate ship. They had trios, random groups or pairs. The pairs were a strong bond, often sharing everything: treasure, food, water, tasks and, of course, a sleeping spot or bed. Shotaro was considered too young to pair up or to be a part of a group, but they always pushed him to be with Sungchan at all times. They were responsible for the “kids”, everyone younger than them. 

“You should have said something else,” Wonbin says simply. “It doesn’t matter what we do on land, the ship is sacred. It’s different.” 

Shotaro rubs his head again, stressed. 

“I can fix it,” he mumbles. “I will fix it.” 

“I’m happy that we have more people with us, though,” Wonbin adds. “It’s about time. When Chanyoung leaves, we have to get more people to join us… the work gets less hard and the ship is no longer too quiet and too empty.” 

“We’re just tired.” 

“Maybe. This has been a long journey.” 

Shotaro takes the cue to leave and asks for Chanyoung’s help. He loves to ask the boy to help him, mostly because everything is new and exciting from the student's perspective. It’s clear that he led a sheltered life yet he has the taste for adventure. 

Poor boy is already yawning. 

“Do you want me to replace you tonight?” Shotaro offers while hoisting the sails. 

Chanyoung has his arms up high and he looks at the Captain with a smile. 

“Not really. I want to spend time with Wonbin. I’ve had a dark drink, I think it’ll keep me up at night.” 

“You should be careful with those drinks, they mess up your insides,” Shotaro warns. 

They laugh. The work is hard but never sad if you have a good mate to share your tasks with. 

Shotaro wipes his dusty hands on his pants and walks inside to see if everyone is already settled. Sohee is washing dishes and singing, his sweet voice echoing on the wood walls; Bini is deep asleep on Wonbin’s bed, stretched like a wet noodle, and he checks the bed Sungchan usually sleeps in to find him and Seunghan sleeping like babies there. 

He goes back to his room, lighting the way there in silence, though he can hear the voices of the men on the deck. He walks in and has to hold a scream. 

He forgot Eunseok was in the boat for a moment, but now he is, sleeping on his bed, illuminated by a candle and the moonlight coming from the window. 

“Oh.” Shotaro sighs in relief. Eunseok has a thin blanket over his body and he looks so peaceful. So calm. Shotaro takes off his boots and belt, which are heavy and noisy, and then sits on the floor, taking his notebook from under the bed. He taps the floor a few times, looking for something to write and he finally finds a little wood thing he got from the white-haired visitors. 

Free nights are the only moments when he can practice and study the language. He has filled half of the notebook; repeating words and meanings, translating and copying. It’s hard. 

“Are you illiterate?” 

Shotaro looks up, startled by the whisper. Eunseok is looking down, propped up on his elbows in the bed. 

“Not in my mother language.” Shotaro smiles. 

Eunseok sits up and gets closer, his shadow covering the book pages. 

“You’re from the Island, right? The one that closed its gates.”

“Yes.” Shotaro stares at him curiously. “What do you know about it?” 

“We had a few guests from there. They taught me a few things.” 

His small hands hold Shotaro’s notebook and close it, the small tool in between pages. Eunseok sits down next to Shotaro, making almost no sound as he does it. The moonlight hits the back of their hair, projecting their silhouettes against Shotaro’s collection. 

“Really? Like what?”

“To cook, mostly.” Eunseok gets even closer and the Captain smells spices and soap. “A few words. Thank you. Please. Thank you for the meal.” 

His pronunciation is cute and soft, almost childish. Shotaro can’t help but giggle. Eunseok lifts his index finger and touches Shotaro’s cheek gently as he says, 

“ Beautiful man.” 

It’s the correct word and pronunciation and Shotaro appreciates it and then realizes that the other man is talking about him. 

Shotaro laughs nervously, unconsciously leaning away. 

“You speak well,” he mumbles, sounding defeated. 

Eunseok is staring at him quietly, his warm body way too close. Shotaro takes a deep breath and turns back to him, garnering all his braveness to approach the topic. 

“About what Jinsu said,” he manages to say it without hesitation. “He was just trying to mock me. I told him you’re nice to look at because that’s what I say when I want to keep art pieces and jewelry. He asks me for what and I say that.”

“If I’m nice to look at, why do you avoid looking at me?” Eunseok asks simply. 

Shotaro gasps. Eunseok is articulated and rational and Shotaro is used to very emotional debates. Their thin shirt sleeves are touching again; someone must have leaned closer. 

“I mean.” Shotaro laughs and rubs his hair, nervous. “I just wanna say you don’t have to do anything huhn, else, to stay. We’re going to take you to the city like we said.”

“I know.” Eunseok nods. “You’re not lying when you say that.”

Shotaro finds the way he speaks interesting. 

“Do you know when I’m lying?” 

“I know you’re lying when you say you’re not a pirate.” 

Shotaro stares at him in silence. 

“Your eyes don’t lie,” Eunseok adds. 

“We’re not pirates anymore,” Shotaro explains. “But we used to be. We were raised on a boat and this boat caught on fire. This is why you shouldn’t mention Sungchan’s family. We all lost our families twice.” 

Eunseok listens carefully. 

“What about his birth family?” 

“Don’t ask. He was old enough to remember their passing.” Shotaro raises a finger. “Even the pirates wouldn’t mention it. You shouldn’t talk about families or the past or being a pirate. Also, don’t comment on anyone's scars.” 

Eunseok nods slowly, his eyes too soft. 

“Do you have scars?” He asks suddenly. 

“No,” Shotaro says. 

Eunseok looks at the captain’s body intently, up and down. Shotaro laughs out of nervousness, hands rubbing the holes in his shirt. 

The wind is stronger against the ship as Wonbin changes its course, and they are moving faster and rocking visibly. Eunseok gets closer and at this point, it’s clear what he wants. 

“We don’t do those things here.” Shotaro stares at his own hands. “So, hm. Again, don’t--it’s not.” 

“I heard that pirates did it in the sea,” Eunseok says, almost in a whisper. “That they plant their seed in each other. Is that true?” 

Shotaro tenses. 

“Not here. We’re not--” He chokes, nervous, watching how close Eunseok is. “They do it, it’s true. Some, but… we do not. We only take lovers when we are on land.” 

“That’s a pity,” Eunseok says. “I’d like you to show me how to do it.” 

Shotaro is now speechless. He swallows hard, incapable of thinking about an answer; the sounds of the foreign language mix and confuse his mind for a minute. His heart is beating so fast and his arms react before he can even understand what he’s doing. 

He kisses Eunseok. It feels inevitable. 

The other man makes a small sound, surprised, but he welcomes the touch, his hand grabbing Shotaro’s hair gently. There’s a sound of a splash and a few drops enter the room through the window. Shotaro pulls Eunseok closer, open lips to taste him better, and his body gets so warm and fuzzy. The ship's hull creaks as it bobs in the restless sea, the men’s bodies are now so entangled they feel like one. Shotaro is feverish, incapable of doing anything but chasing another kiss, unlike Eunseok who wraps himself around the Captain with arms and legs, pulling him down. 

It’s blurry. Shotaro knows they’re rubbing their bodies together, it feels like it’s something they should not be doing, but he presses his knee harder against Eunseok’s crotch and the hardness there, just to hear his muffled moans between kisses. Eunseok’s hand finds its way to Shotaro’s pants and the outcome is that they’re no longer kissing, yet their foreheads are pressed together, noses touching as small sounds come out of their mouths. 

It’s been so long since Shotaro had someone in his arms, he can’t help but melt into the touch, holding Eunseok like a lifeline. The cook is also sounding weak and desperate, but unlike Shotaro, he doesn’t hide it. He throws his head back, cringing, and Shotaro kisses his neck as the other man reaches his climax. 

Eunseok looks up at the ceiling, eyes wide open, and then he seems to say something. 

Shotaro mumbles what? but then he’s kissed again, and it’s not a gentle kiss. Eunseok’s whole hand is inside of Shotaro’s pants and his long fingers are pressing him intently. Shotaro doesn’t know what to do, so he just gives in and allows Eunseok to touch and kiss him even if he senses he should stop it, he should at least try to fight against it. 

Eunseok’s hand is dirty when he removes it from the inside of the other man’s clothes. Shotaro is breathing hard against the cook’s neck, their bodies on the wooden floor like forgotten belongings. The bed is right next to them, empty and clear under the moonlight, now that the maroon curtains are dancing in the wind. 

.

.

.

.

Chapter Text

.

.

They know they’re near Port City when they start seeing other ships - cargo ships, mostly. Port City isn’t the best place to live or to party, but it’s undoubtedly fascinating, full of foreign boats and strange people. 

From the ship, Shotaro stares at the much bigger ship that sails ahead of them and smiles. He’s unsure how he has spent so long in the sea without losing his mind. He closes the curtains and sits on the bed, stretching his arms. It’s about time he gets the helm again, but now that Chanyoung has gotten used to it, he wants to spend every night on the deck, and, of course, Sohee and Seunghan are always around, looking for some fun games and talking all night long. 

The overall mood has improved in the past few days. The ship looks, sounds and feels alive again. 

Shotaro stares at the man in his bed and sighs happily. Of course, he must give credit to Eunseok - he is the most unexpected treasure Shotaro has ever found. Eunseok is not only a really hard worker, often devoting himself to each small task completely, but he’s also a good mate to be around. Sohee asks Eunseok not to clean the floor that much, because they’re all weirded out by how bright it looks; Wonbin begs Eunseok to stop washing the dishes and watching the garden incessantly. Sungchan reluctantly teaches Eunseok how to shoot, finds out Eunseok is as blind as he is, and proceeds to frown each time Eunseok humbly asks for his glasses to read something. We all borrow everything here, just take it, mate. 

Every single time Shotaro walks by his crew, Eunseok is doing something. He’s carrying a box with Sungchan, tending to Wonbin’s garden, talking to Seunghan at the helm, taking a nap with Chanyoung and playing with Sohee. Now, Eunseok is sleeping peacefully next to Shotaro when he shouldn’t. After what they did, Shotaro thought maybe it was better if the cook had his own sleeping spot. The Captain then found a forgotten hammock and installed it in Seunghan’s room, the member who seemed the most comfortable and chill around the newbie. The hammock was comfortable, and Shotaro had seen Eunseok taking a nap there, but he refused to spend the night anywhere but Shotaro’s bed. 

And they had the rule about locking doors…

So, every night, Shotaro would look up from his notebook and find Eunseok standing in his room, staring down at him in silence. He’s a quiet person, but he’s undoubtedly persuasive. God knows how he was able to apologize to and win Sungchan over, but he did it smoothly, therefore, it’s clear that Shotaro, who is much easier to convince than his quartermaster, never says no when the cook asks to stay. 

He has a routine: he patiently waits until Shotaro finishes his studies and welcomes the Captain with a kiss. He seems to enjoy kissing a lot, and Shotaro never denies it, though he wonders what exactly Eunseok heard about pirates doing at night - kissing your mates in the mouth, no matter how close they were, was not a thing in Shotaro’s old ship. Yet it’s good. Eunseok's kisses are sweet and gentle, almost soothing. His hands are soft when they touch Shotaro, like he’s handling a very delicate thing and not a strong grown man. 

It has been barely a week since Eunseok arrived, and he’s very much a part of the crew. Just like Chanyoung, it’s hard to imagine how devastating it will be when he departs. Shotaro tries not to get too attached to Eunseok's warm hugs and kisses, despite craving them badly. 

Eunseok opens his eyes and turns his face to Shotaro, startled. 

“Have we docked?” He asks quietly.

“No, probably only at night.” Shotaro moves the dark hair out of the cook’s pretty face. “We have a lot to do today. You have to get up.” 

Eunseok stretches cutely, sounding like Bini when the cat complains. Shotaro giggles, amused, already getting ready to leave the bed. 

Eunseok stares as the Captain stands. 

“You’re hard.” 

Shotaro rubs his own eyes, nodding. 

“It’s normal.” He chuckles lightly. “I often wake up like that. Don’t you?” 

Eunseok nods, his quiet gaze following the other man as he puts his pants on. While Shotaro is tying his boots, Eunseok sits up and puts on his rubber kitchen shoes. None of the boots they had fit his small feet; because of that, no one could hear the cooking approaching them. 

“You need some shoes when we leave the boat,” Shotaro observes. “I think I’ll ask one of the boys to get them for you.” 

Eunseok often waits for instructions. Shotaro thinks it’s cute. He’s very polite. 

“Let’s eat something.” Shotaro stands, offering his hand. 

It’s a bright morning outside, and the ship is noisy with the crew getting excited to have a break. Shotaro enters the kitchen and finds Wonbin on the floor, sewing a fishnet and singing alone.

“Good morning.” Shotaro smiles, feeling his mate’s good mood. “What’s that smell?”

Wonbin looks up and wipes his sweaty forehead. His hair is getting too long, and it’s wet and glued to his shoulders. 

“We bought fruits from a ship leaving Port City,” he says happily. “They had a few ripe ones to exchange with us.” 

Shotaro looks for a bowl, but he’s listening carefully. 

“What did you give them?” 

“Our good fishnets,” Wonbin chuckles. “But I can fix the ones we have here.” 

“They didn’t have fishnets? Why didn’t they buy them in Port City?” Shotaro frowns, balancing bowls, cutlery and cups. 

“They stopped for a day, and it seems like there’s a holiday in Port City. A festival, I think. The stores will be closed for a couple of days,” Wonbin answers, his skilled fingers sewing quietly. “I think we should dock and stay in the boat until tomorrow.” 

Eunseok inspects the fruits while Shotaro is gathering the utensils. 

“That’s fair. Is Sungchan setting the traps?” 

“He and the boys are repairing them first.” Wonbin stops sewing, and his tone changes. “He’s opening the piggy bank later.” 

“Hum.” Shotaro nods. “I see.” 

There’s not really a fixed position for each member. The helm is usually Seunghan’s task because he doesn’t like to stay inside and, also, his wooden arm is strong and hardly tired of holding the helm. Wonbin is in the kitchen, but sometimes Sohee cooks too. Shotaro is the one contacting other boats, but if it’s an official ship, they often send Sohee, because he’s from the land and also the one who has the most harmless appearance. Sungchan takes care of the money. It’s only natural, considering he had a good formal education and he’s good at math. 

“Has everyone eaten already?” Shotaro wonders. 

“Yeah. It’s late, hyung.” Wonbin smiles. 

“Gonna get those lychee and mangos,” Shotaro announces, making sure Eunseok sits at the table. “What’s left?” 

“Fish pudding and dark drink--”

The heavy sounds of boots interrupt Wonbin. Sungchan walks in, and he looks different: he’s wearing his reading glasses, but he’s shirtless and dirty, hair covered in clips. 

“Wonbin-ah.” He cracks his neck. “I need a knife.” 

“No,” Wonbin says. 

“Please! I won't bend it this time. The trap box's lid is stuck!” He whines cutely. 

“You always say that you won’t bend it, and then you ruin my knives anyway.” Wonbin doesn’t even spare him a look. “Also, the hyungs are eating now. They need them…” 

Sungchan turns to the table, startled, as if he hadn’t noticed that someone else was in the kitchen with them. He sees Shotaro standing with the fruits and Eunseok sitting down, holding the knife. 

“Ah.” The quartermaster sighs. “I see.” 

Shotaro can’t intervene in this fight - knives are Wonbin’s, like everything else in the kitchen - but he can find a way. He puts the fruits on the table, checks his belt for a pocket knife and rushes to give them to his mate. 

“Is this one good?” 

Sungchan glances at it and nods. 

“It can be of use.” 

“Take it.” Shotaro smiles, content. “I’ll go upstairs soon to help you.”

Sungchan takes the knife in silence but mumbles a thank you before leaving. He’s too quiet, and Shotaro noticed the lack of eye contact. There’s something off. 

“Captain,” Eunseok calls. “May I serve your meal?” 

Wonbin snorts, amused. Eunseok is not being sarcastic or joking, he takes hierarchy very seriously as a servant. Yet, it’s funny to get this treatment from a member of his crew.

“Of course,” Shotaro says absently. “Make your bowl as well.” 

Instead of returning to the table, Shotaro sits next to Wonbin on the floor, no space between them.

“Is everything okay?” Shotaro whispers.

“I guess so. I heard no fights this morning,” the cook whispers back. 

“Is Sungchannie in a bad mood?” 

Wonbin shrugs. 

“He's been working hard since sunrise and tolerating Sohee and Chanyoung as his assistants, so. I’d say no.” 

Shotaro hums, lost in thought. 

“Didn’t he wake you up earlier?” Wonbin raises an eyebrow. 

“No,” Shotaro says, distracted, and then he realizes that, well, maybe. He stares at the cook cutting fruits quietly. If Sungchan tried to, then he saw Eunseok in Shotaro’s bed. The Captain has (famously) a hard time waking up, so they often have to drag him out of bed. 

“Were you with Eunseok-hyung?” Wonbin asks suddenly. 

Shotaro slips his hands under his shirt to rub his belly, a nervous gesture.

“Yeah.” 

Wonbin hums. 

“Are you planning to stay somewhere in Port City?” Shotaro asks suddenly, changing the subject. 

“It’ll be nice if we all stay at the same guesthouse.” He wipes his forehead again. “Junmyeon-hyung still has his place there. We could stay in a room just in case.” 

“Yes. That’s nice, but I’m not sure if the boys will be back at night.” 

“They won’t, but at least we have a meeting spot. We won’t be robbed there.” 

“They don’t need to be robbed. Have you seen Seunghan with money?” Shotaro chuckles, and Wonbin snorts. 

“Captain,” Eunseok calls him. 

Shotaro stands up and dusts his clothes off. He smiles at the sight of the cute display of sliced food and the bowl with fish pudding. 

“Is that how the noblemen like their food?” Shotaro asks curiously but also with a playful tone. 

“If it looks nice, they’d eat caramelized feces,” Eunseok says simply. 

Wonbin explodes in laughter. Shotaro laughs, of course, but he’s permanently surprised by the sincere and crude sentences that come out of Eunseok’s mouth, all framed in unusual politeness. 

“I see.” Shotaro sits next to him. “I prefer taste over appearance when it comes to food. But, I must say, I like the way you make the dishes look fancy.” 

“Thank you,” Eunseok whispers. 

“Ah, if the pudding is good, I also want praise,” Wonbin complains, his voice sounding like a kid. 

Eunseok has this effect, Shotaro noticed. If Sohee wants to be around the cook, Chanyoung complains. If Seunghan asks Eunseok for hugs, Sohee complains. Unlike Chanyoung, who is a naive baby to all, Eunseok’s presence seems to be causing a little bit of jealousy here and there. It’s understandable.

“It is always good,” Shotaro emphasizes. Wonbin makes an annoyed noise, but he doesn’t say anything else. 

“I like it,” Eunseok says simply. 

Wonbin looks down, probably pretending to be focused. He’s shy. 

Shotaro rubs Eunseok’s thigh under the table, happy. 

“I think you’re lucky we stopped here. Port City is full of businesses and boats, and they’re all in need of workers.” Shotaro starts eating, looking away. “It’s maybe the best place to start a new life.” 

Eunseok starts to eat, slow as always. 

“What do you do when you come here?” He asks. 

“We go out for drinks, we check on friends, and we play games,” Shotaro answers. “We can also buy stuff we need.” 

“Do you have many friends in Port City?” 

“Hyung has many friends everywhere,” Wonbin answers for Shotaro. 

“And Wonbin always disappears for the entire time we’re there,” Shotaro retaliates. 

Eunseok chuckles lightly. 

“I’ve never been to Port City,” he informs them. 

“You can stick with us if you need to.” Shotaro taps Eunseok’s leg. “Just don’t go out with Seunghan and Sohee. They bet all their money on odd games and often find trouble.” 

“Ah, Eunseok-hyung is a good player, though. He won every single card game he played with us.” Wonbin points. “Maybe he could win some money.” 

“It’s not a challenge to win against this crew. None of us is good at card games,” the Captain argues tiredly. “I said it about Chanyoung, but you should also not teach Eunseok terrible lessons. He’s not like us, he’s made his survival out of hard work.”

Eunseok touches Shotaro’s hand under the table. 

“I’m willing to learn anything you have to teach me,” he says, his voice low and soft. 

Shotaro gulps.  

“We also work hard,” Wonbin complains, unaware of what’s happening. 

“You do,” Shotaro looks away from Eunseok, feeling uncomfortable. “But let’s not put anyone else in trouble. Let’s teach him useful things for a decent life. We’re not pirates anymore, we are not supposed to be out there betting.”

“Well, if he wants to learn how to sew,” Wonbin raises the fishnet, “I’d like some help.”

“I know how to sew,” Eunseok says, standing up. 

Shotaro pulls him down by the arm. 

“Finish your meal first. We have time for that.” 

Eunseok complies. Shotaro finishes his meal fast because he’s hungry, but he doesn’t want to work with a full belly (a lesson he learned the hard way). He leaves his mates in the kitchen, washes his mouth and goes to the deck. The sun is so strong that the sunlight feels heavy on his skin as he walks to the only place with shade. Sungchan and Sohee are fixing the traps, both almost naked and covered in dirt, singing weird songs with funny voices. 

It’s a calming sight to witness their playfulness. 

Shotaro catches sight of Chanyoung at the helm, Seunghan on the floor near him, resting under his shadow. There are ships around, and they’re not worried about that since they’re all heading to the same place; it’s not a safe zone for pirates. They have officials and heavy regulations, hardly easy to escape unscathed. That doesn’t stop crime, but it certainly forces big pirate ships to stay away. 

“We have to dress up,” Shotaro says, and he approaches Sohee to pinch the boy’s naked belly. 

“Ouch! We’re not done yet,” Sohee whines, raising the spikes in his hands to defend himself. 

“Your knife,” Sungchan says, extending his hand to show the poor tool, fully bent. 

Shotaro is speechless. 

“What did you do to it…” He cries, staring at the remains of his pocket knife. 

“The trap door was really stuck.” Sungchan wipes his dirty face under his glasses. “I can buy you another one in Port City.” 

Shotaro frowns. Usually, Sungchan would mock him and his bent knife, making fun of the situation. Just a second ago, he was letting his weird self shine with Sohee, but now he’s back to seriousness and distance. 

Sometimes, Shotaro misses how easy and close their relationship used to be. He doesn’t remember a single fight in their old ship. He misses having a best mate who looked at him as a best mate too, he longs for the happiness he saw in Sungchan’s eyes when they looked at each other. 

“There’s no need, I can fix it.” Shotaro smiles encouragingly. 

“You still can use it in a fight like that,” Sohee points out. “Surprise the enemy!” 

They all laugh. 

“This is why we don’t let you fight.” Shotaro kicks him lightly. “Is there something I can help you with?” 

“You could put your expensive things back in the secret compartments,” Sungchan says. “And get us a few that we can sell.” 

“What? My stuff?” 

“The hell are you going to do with statues ? We live on a ship.” 

“Keep it. I like them.” 

“There are a lot of ships around. We’ll be able to sell those art pieces without any problem or officials up our asses. No traces of how we got them…” 

“They’re not for sale. Why do you want to sell my belongings so badly? Are we broke, is that so?” 

Sohee’s eyes follow the two as they speak and his confused smile is a sign he’s not feeling safe. 

Sungchan sighs deeply. 

“It was only a suggestion, Captain.” He goes back to his task, shrugging his wide shoulders and looking down. The hair clips shine on his head, and Shotaro feels like the cruellest man in the world. 

“I’ll take a look,” he says quietly. Sungchan doesn’t say anything else, and Sohee rubs his own head nervously, accidentally getting it all covered in oil. 

“Go wash yourself, Sohee, I’ll finish it.” Shotaro pokes him until the boy stands. 

“Am I too dirty?” Sohee asks, sniffing himself as he walks away. Shotaro sits down, taking his place and gets ready to oil the rusty tools. After they dock and lock the ship, they place many traps around in case someone tries to break in. Their money and treasures are hidden and kept inside those traps. 

Shotaro waits until he’s sure one is listening to them. 

“We shouldn’t discuss certain things in front of the kids,” he starts calmly.

“They aren’t kids anymore,” Sungchan says simply. 

“What I’m saying is that maybe it’s better if we discuss ship matters privately.” 

“I would do it if I knew you’d at least listen to me.” 

Shotaro stares at the other man. Sungchan was always a tall kid, but he became much bigger after what they went through. Not even the burns in his legs stopped him from doing the physical work. 

“I listen to you.” 

Sungchan cracks his neck, visibly annoyed. 

“But you don’t value my advice or opinion.” 

“That’s not fair. I trust you.” 

“I know you do. I’m saying is that you don’t treat me like an equal, so my words mean less to you.” 

“Is that how you feel?”

“It’s a fact. We wouldn’t be arguing so much if you truly listened to what I have to say. You always say we are on the same level, but I feel like I have to beg to be considered,” he says in such a tired tone, as if he’s not up for a fight. “It’s painful for me to admit, but I’m not sure if you ever truly saw me as a best mate as you say I am.”

Shotaro takes a deep breath. That hurts. 

He watches how Sungchan goes back to his task as if he said such a casual thing, and his mind wanders, flowing back to the past, to the first night they arrived in the Capital city after a day of rowing. 

They weren’t far from land when the ship caught on fire. The pirates were partying, celebrating a new chapter after looting a nearby ship. Shotaro remembers how wasted his mates were, how happy they seemed and how loud their chanting was. They had a reputation for being a noisy cre,w and it was deserved. 

The problem that night, Shotaro found out, was that the fire started in the cabins, down to the top. With most crew members on the deck and wandering, they took too long to understand the severity of the situation. When the intoxicated pirates realized the ship was on fire, several internal parts had been consumed. They couldn’t stop it anymore. 

The kids often slept on the deck, but that night, they were in a cabin - too young to join the party. Sungchan was the one who told Shotaro that they woke up when a huge part of the wall fell on them. It was burning, and it was heavy, so Sungchan, sleeping by the door with Shotaro in case they had an attack, was awakened by screams. He was able to remove Seunghan and Wonbin from under it and took them to the deck, running there only to find that the fire was taking over the ship. There was no escape but the sea.

He went back to get the other kids, but the smoke was all around their room. Shotaro was still sleeping, and when Sungchan, going through fire to get in, was able to catch someone in, he pulled an unconscious Sion. Panicking, he returned to the deck, watching as the boy was deeply asleep. Their Captain tried to reanimate Sion, and when Sungchan tried to go back inside to get Shotaro, someone stopped him. 

“We already lost one,” Taeyong said. “Boys, put Sungchan and the kids in a boat. Let’s get in.” 

Sungchan had no say in the decisions. They covered their burns with fabric, put water and food in the boat, and waited. 

Sion was on the floor. He wouldn’t wake up. Sungchan was holding the row and waiting for a miracle. 

His prayers were heard: Shotaro walked out of the flames, soon being held by the seniors.

After that night, rowing back to land, they didn’t speak to each other. They cried in silence and from time to time, there was a sound of pain and grief. 

They were rescued easily because they looked like poor wounded kids. Shotaro told the officials they were attacked by pirates, an instruction he received from his seniors. Never tell them you’re one of us. You’re young, and you’ll have more chances if you don’t associate with us. Tell them you’re escaping. 

There was some help at the beginning. They treated the wounds and performed surgery on Seunghan, whose arm had to be cut off due to the severity of his burns. While they were treated, Shotaro, the only one unharmed, spent his days taking up any work he found and his nights looking for friends, old allies that could help them find their crew members or what survived out of them. It was a tough time. 

Shotaro was able to gather food, money and find them a roof: a single room in a poor neighbourhood, courtesy of an old crew member who owed their captain a favour. They were kicked out of the hospital facilities, and they moved into the city, where they lived for a year, working and unsuccessfully trying to find their mates. 

Some bodies were found. Burned and disfigured, some drowned and half-eaten by fish, their deceased crew members were classified as unknown pirates. 

After a long year, they were able to get a ship to start their business. Shotaro realized that their crew would never return as one way it was. 

During this year, Shotaro had slept in bed with Wonbin, who had terrible nightmares and often woke up searching for his Sion, only to remember that he wasn’t there anymore. 

Their happily naive days were over for good. Sungchan used his writing skills to make money, and Wonbin would sing in taverns, soon getting work as a cook. They didn’t allow Seunghan to work, so Shotaro would take anything. Anything. 

Sungchan didn’t like it when he returned late at night. What were you doing ? , he would ask suspiciously, knowing Shotaro wasn’t carrying boxes after midnight. 

Shotaro wasn’t “The Captain” back then. I don’t want you outside at night ; we need you here, Sungchan decided, and Shotaro agreed. 

So they took longer, but they were able to start their delivery services. 

Getting back on a ship was slightly different. They had their own beds and had to manage everything themselves. It was challenging yet familiar. Until they added Sohee, a member who brought only happiness and shared no traumatic past with them, the crew wasn’t in a great mood. During this time, Shotaro and Sungchan, who were once inseparable mates, grew apart. 

Now, as Shotaro looks at this grown man who vaguely resembles the scrawny weird kid he met, he realizes that he’s almost losing his best mate. 

“Sungchan-ah,” Shotaro says quietly, waiting patiently until the other man looks at him. 

Sungchan seems so tired behind his glasses. His oily hands hold a towel and the trap box. Shotaro takes both things from him gently and then holds Sungchan’s hands. 

“You’re my best mate,” Shotaro reassures him. “And you’ll always be my best mate. You’re the one who taught me to be a pirate, the one who taught me the language and how to be a good Captain. I owe you so much. We survived together, and we’ll die together.” 

Sungchan is breathing faster - understandably, since he’s an emotional man. 

“No one can replace you in my heart,” Shotaro says slowly. “No one will ever replace you.” 

It’s too hot to be touching, and they’re both dirty, but Sungchan moves his head to lovingly press their foreheads together, smiling shyly. It’s his I love you . 

Shotaro smiles back. 

“I’m sorry if I made you feel this way,” the Captain whispers. “If I don’t listen to you, I’m screwed. You know that.” 

Sungchan giggles, eyes shrinking and grip tightening. 

“Thank you for saying that.” 

It doesn’t take long for both to get too shy to keep touching. Shotaro lets go of the grip, and Sungchan moves back, trying to shake the awkwardness off. They sit in silence for a while to recompose themselves. 

“We… hm, we should finish this soon,” Shotaro breaks the ice. “So we could have a decent conversation with the crew.” 

“Yeah,” Sungchan agrees. “Ask the guy to join us here. Chanyoung will need the instructions as well.” 

“Does Eunseok need it? I'm not sure if he's coming back to the boat. He's probably staying in Port City.” 

“Well, if he needs to, and we're not here, he's gonna lose a limb trying,” Sungchan says simply. “Better be safe than sorry.” 

Shotaro nods. A part of him wants to believe Eunseok will stay, and as he cleans himself on the way to the kitchen, he hears a laugh that he has never heard before and, just after, Wonbin's shy giggles. He spies a little bit like a creep and finds them sitting on the floor surrounded by the nets, but now they're sitting parallel to each other. Wonbin has his head down, looking at the floor, and Eunseok is using a sharp kitchen knife to cut his hair. 

Shotaro stares at the black strands of hair over Wonbin's lap and gasps. 

Eunseok notices him. 

“He asked me to do it,” he says quickly. “Captain.”

Wonbin raises his hair, his face suddenly so young. He resembles himself a few years before, even with the scars in his neck.  

“Hyung?”

Shotaro walks in, smiling, his heart beating fast. The natural lighting in the kitchen is not great but he sees it clearly for a moment, like it was yesterday, a much younger and smiley Wonbin. 

“Oh.” Shotaro gulps. “You cut your hair.”

“Is it okay?” He asks, glancing at Eunseok. “Too short?”

It still falls on his eyes. 

“Not really.” Shotaro smiles. “Eunseok, Sungchan needs you on the deck. He’s going to lecture you about the traps.” 

“You're too dirty for my kitchen,” Wonbin accuses. “We're reaching the shore. Go wash yourself at the water before you come here.” 

Shotaro walks backwards, hands up like he's seeing a gun pointed at him.

Eunseok walks out of the kitchen and touches Shotaro’s greasy hair on his way out. Wonbin is collecting his hair strands very calmly. 

“Do you want any of my stuff?” Shotaro asks. “Sungchan wants to sell them.” 

Wonbin shakes his head, still looking down. He has a couple of winter coats and hats that Shotaro gave him, but he prefers his own collected pieces. He’s a much simpler man. 

Shotaro wipes his hands on his pants and starts the ritual of protecting his treasure. Before they leave the boat, everything has to be hidden and safe under fake doors and traps. Shotaro has many secret spots, so it’s not hard - the hardest part is to give up on pretty things. 

He grew up in a calm household. He was happy with his family and their simple life in his Village, but he knew deep inside his heart that he was made to live very far. Some pirates are born pirates before they even meet the sea. His seniors said he was a natural and it was true. He loved adventure, and he loved to keep treasures. 

Sohee comes to rescue him after his hard work. 

“We reached shallow waters,” he announces happily. “We can swim a little bit.” 

There is still sunlight outside. Yeah, they have a couple of hours before the sun goes down. Shotaro goes after some soap and takes off his shirt as he walks. As he walks out, he realizes he was so immersed in his tasks that he didn't even listen to how loud Port City is, even at the shore. A line of big ships is next to them, and the land shows that there is a celebration happening. The dock area is full, and besides the common sailors and seamen, they have well-dressed people walking by. 

The familiar voices are coming from the other side of the ship, hidden. Shotaro bets they're naked and washing themselves, away from the curious eyes of the dock. Chanyoung and Wonbin are sitting on the deck, resting, so Shotaro finds Eunseok looking down at the sea alone. 

“Won't you jump?” He mocks, drawing the attention of the cook. 

Eunseok stares at him, the sunset's orange lights on his face. Shotaro's heart skips a beat. 

“Do I have to jump?” 

“It's faster.” Shotaro takes off his pants, distracted. 

“Naked?” 

“Well. Do you swim in clothes?”

“Actually, yes.” 

Shotaro laughs at that. Capital city is so prude. He has seen how people go to the beaches fully dressed. 

“Well, I'm going to wash myself,” Shotaro says simply and shows the soap. Eunseok seems so calm. Sungchan, Seunghan and Sohee are in the water, also naked and swimming, but Eunseok is unaffected by them, as he has been unaffected by anything they've done and said. He'd make a great pirate. 

Shotaro had to adapt to the crudeness of living in a boat with seamen. They hid nothing and were not nice or polite. Shotaro remembers laughing out of discomfort, trying to get used to their jokes, nakedness and violence. They never subjected Chanyoung or Sohee to any of that. Sohee was curious and easily adapted to their ways, but Chanyoung still refuses to join them when there's any nudity involved. He's used to death and pain, but gets shy if they're joking about private subjects. 

Shotaro finds a deeper part to jump into, holds the dry soap against his chest and smiles, looking down.

He falls right next to Seunghan, who gets startled, and his body sinks under the sea. It's still clear, easy to see the fish and limbs, but now the voices from the other boats disappear to welcome the ocean silence.

He floats, throws his head back to remove the hair off his eyes and raises the soap like a prize.

“Great,” Sungchan nods. “I can't get the grease off my hair.”

It's an old ritual. Sungchan takes the soap and starts washing Sohee's hair first because that's how he lives his life, being a father to the youngest. Shotaro swims, eyes on Eunseok, who watches them lazily, chin on his hands like an old gossipy lady. The sea is deliciously warm at this hour, no longer the cold knife it feels under the sun. Shotaro swims around, naked and free, hidden from the city behind the boat. 

“Come here,” Sungchan calls him. He’s standing, and the water barely covers his crotch, exposing his body hair. Shotaro promptly sits in front of him. 

“Ah, that’s bad,” the quartermaster says, and his strong hands become very soft while he washes Shotaro’s hair. He’s done this so often that he knows that Shotaro likes it when he rubs behind the ears and hates it when soap falls on his eyes. 

“Will I have to cut it off?” Shotaro teases. 

Sungchan scoffs, wiping his Captain's forehead to clean the soap. 

“I hope not. It looks nicer when it's longer.” 

Shotaro's hair is very susceptible to the sun, so when it gets longer, it's lighter, easily burned by the sunlight. It takes a while, but Sungchan asks him to dive to remove the soap. His hair is clean, so he's ready to do the same for his best mate. 

Sungchan sits and tries to make his giant body smaller, and Shotaro stands to wash his hair. The sun is now almost gone, and the water is warm and welcoming. 

“Throw the ladder,” Sohee says to Eunseok. Seunghan probably wants to leave, and he needs help to climb his way back without some help or his wooden arm. 

Sungchan is quietly enjoying being washed, almost purring. Shotaro guides him to the water and washes down the grease and soap. Sungchan submerges for a minute and then starts floating, his smiling face above the water. 

He opens his eyes and stares at Shotaro. 

“Good?” Shotaro asks playfully. 

“Yeah,” Sungchan answers softly. 

That's it, Shotaro realizes. They were missing this, the closeness and kind moments. Shotaro was so focused on his duties that he forgot that, at the end, the most important thing is that they're still together. They’re alive and well. 

Shotaro lies next to him - both are floating now, watching the sun disappear. The ocean is really scary at night, but they're basically on land. 

Eunseok is no longer in the place he was; now, probably inside, but they left the ladder hanging just in case. 

“Do you have plans for Port City?” Sungchan asks, his hand gripping Shotaro's wrist. 

“Get a break from you all,” Shotaro jokes. 

Sungchan laughs. It's actually what they do when they have some time to spend in a city. 

The sky is clean and nice, full of stars. The time is still calm; all they do is float. 

Wonbin's head pops out of a window. 

“Are you two still there? It’s getting cold. Get out of the water.”

“Yeah,” Shotaro says. “Or a crab will grab your balls again, Jinsu.” 

Sungchan jumps up and kicks Shotaro playfully.

“It only happened once,” he complains. 

Climbing the ladder naked during the night is terrible. The wind is cold against their skins. When Shotaro gets to the deck, he runs inside to his quarters, shaking. 

He almost ends up wearing Eunseok's clothes because he finds them on his bed. Shotaro grabs the shirt and realizes that it has many tiny pockets inside. A few small bottles fall from the pockets, and they contain spices and plants.

Shotaro didn't know cooks hid their spices and herbs in their clothes. He puts everything back in place and looks for his own clothes that are folded next to the bed, Then he realizes they'll land, so he has to be well dressed. He throws his usual clothing away and opens the box where he keeps the fancy clothing. He looks back at the bed and realizes that Eunseok is probably doing the same - he can't be around in kitchen clothes or rags. 

Eunseok walks in as quietly as always. Shotaro is getting his clothes and jewelry, piling them up, when he notices the man is near. He looks up, and Eunseok kisses him.

Shotaro is startled, but he doesn't move away from it. Eunseok's kisses are sweet like hard candy. 

“What was that for?” Shotaro mumbles, feeling suddenly shy about his naked state. 

“I wanted to kiss you,” Eunseok says simply, sitting on the bed. “They gave me your clothes. They fit me well.”

Eunseok indeed looks like he was born to wear fine silk. The way the shirt fits his body and the fabric pants fall on his legs make him look like he was born to be in a mansion, but not as a cook. 

“They do,” Shotaro agrees. 

“Won't you get dressed, too?” 

“Hm, yes.” Shotaro stands, still embarrassed by his nudity, and finds his way to the washing room. 

He washes his teeth, shaves his face and rubs oil in his hair so it looks nice when dry. Since Eunseok picked his dark clothes, he's left with thick cotton cream pants and a white shirt. 

When he's fully dressed up, socks and all, he takes a look at himself in the small mirror they have. He covers his pierced ears with his hair and repeats to himself that he's not a pirate. For the next few days, he's just a regular seaman.

He's ready to go. He finds Eunseok in the same spot, sitting quietly, and Shotaro imagines a different life where they never met at the sea and not under these terrible conditions. 

Eunseok looks at him quietly - the room is dark, but the lights outside allow them to see each other in the dark. 

“Let's go to the kitchen. Aren't you hungry?” Shotaro smiles.

Eunseok approaches him slowly and stands so close that Shotaro can feel the other man’s breath on his face. 

His heart is beating so fast. What is that? 

Eunseok holds his wrist, and his hand slides until their fingers interlace. 

“Let's go,” Eunseok whispers. 

Shotaro gulps but finds the courage to walk away, pulling Eunseok by the hand. They go to the kitchen easily because the lighting system is on. It’s a special occasion. 

Everyone is sitting at the table. The ship is docked, it’s night, and they’ll celebrate before parting ways for a few days. The bowls on the table have the small cakes they often eat, and a few cut fruits, but it’s not a lot of food. It’s weird to see everyone dressed so nicely, clean and in a good mood. The main oil lamp is right above the table, and the lights from the city and other ships help the dark kitchen look bright. 

Shotaro takes his place, but he waits until Eunseok sits next to him to speak. 

“Let’s pray,” he says, extending his hands if everyone wants to grab them. Even with his eyes closed, he recognizes Sungchan’s hand gently holding his and smiles through his prayer. 

He waits patiently until everyone is quiet to start eating. It’s a nice meal time, and excitement is palpable. 

“Did you mix fruits with dried meat?” Chanyoung asks Wonbin, tasting it intently. He’s the only one who tries to taste and not eat like he’s dying of hunger every time. 

“Yes. Eunseok-hyung lent me some spices.” Wonbin wipes his mouth. 

“I didn’t know cooks carried spices with them,” Shotaro adds. “I saw the tiny bottles inside your clothes earlier.”

Eunseok stops eating momentarily, holding the bowl carefully away from his clothes. He seems to hesitate for a moment, but glances at Shotaro with a smile. 

“It makes cooking easier,” he explains quietly. “It’s something I like to do.”

“When I get to the city, the first thing I’ll get is a warm ramen bowl,” Seunghan announces suddenly. 

“I want fresh meat,” Sohee says, seeming unsure and embarrassed. “Hm, besides other things. I also want some candy.”

Eunseok stares at him curiously. Shotaro intervenes, knowing a hidden issue won’t be discussed. 

“I want fresh milk and tea.” He smiles. “And warm sweet cakes.”

“Remember the sweet cakes from Farm City?” Sungchan says with a nostalgic tone. “Ah, even their dark drinks tasted delicious. So sweet…”

When they weren’t in the sea or the Bay, they would find refuge in small places that reminded Shotaro of home.

“They won’t see those delicacies in Port City,” Wonbin pointed, grounded and pragmatic as always. “It’s a nice place to taste foreign food.”

“Maybe we have those little cakes you always talk about, Captain,” Seunghan adds happily. 

“Well.” Shotaro sighs. “Are we going to discuss our plans now?”

“Let’s finish our meal first,” Sungchan suggests.

“Of course.”

Eunseok’s mind seems to be elsewhere. He’s very quiet and slow, being the last one to empty his bowl. To Shotaro’s surprise, Eunseok takes every bowl from the table and piles them as if he’s about to clean them. 

“You don’t have to do that,” Wonbin says kindly. “I’ll throw the dirty stuff in a bucket with sea water until we get back, it’s fine.”

Eunseok retreats his hands as if he has just realized what he was doing. It’s a habit. Sungchan stands, and Wonbin removes a complaining Bini from the table. 

“Is he going to stay on the ship?” Chanyoung asks. 

“Bini? No. We’ll stay in a place where he’s welcomed.” Wonbin smiles. “If it were dangerous, he would stay.”

“You gotta find his box,” Sohee adds, but the sound of metal against the table is loud and draws everyone’s attention. It’s the safe. 

Rusty but still strong, the safe is opened by Sungchan. The quartermaster checks the insides, puts his glasses on his face and starts to take the coins one by one from inside while counting them out loud. 

“46, 47, 48, 49, 50.” He sits down, cracking his neck. “Fifty coins are enough. Seven for each of us and one for Junmyeon-hyung.”

Some of the men count on their fingers, but Shotaro trusts his best mate, so he whispers to Eunseok. 

“We should always give extra money to friends to show our good intentions,” he explains. 

Eunseok nods, still a bit distracted. 

“Uhn. I… Hyung…” Chanyoung raises his hand like a schoolboy. “I don’t get it. Why am I being counted in this share?”

Sungchan blinks behind his thick glasses, slightly concerned. Eunseok listens and immediately starts to look around. 

“Why wouldn’t you?” Sungchan asks. 

“Anh… I’m a… guest?” He’s unsure, avoiding the words “delivery” or “load”. 

“You’ve worked in this ship since you arrived,” Sungchan answers simply. “You’re a part of the crew even after you leave. If you work, you’re not a guest. That’s the rule.”

Eunseok stares at Sungchan and opens his mouth, also seeming insecure. Seunghan intervenes, 

“You as well, Eunseok-hyung,” he says. 

“That doesn’t seem fair,” Eunseok finally confesses. “I’ve been here for only a week.”

Sungchan sighs loudly. 

“But did you work?”

He’s not expecting an answer, so he starts to divide the coins into seven piles, taking the last one and putting it in his own. Shotaro may be the Captain in the sea, but Sungchan was raised on the land, and he knows how to talk to people. 

Sohee drags the coins until they fall on his lap; his eyes are shining, and his smile is wide. 

“So can we go now?”

“Not before our conversation.”

The announcement hits them like a bucket of cold water. The youngest men, except Chanyoung, who still looks quite lost, whine in displeasure. 

“Well, I know we’ve discussed this before, but we have new members,” Shotaro tries to cheer them up. “It’ll be fast, right, Sunchannie?”

“Of course it will.” Sungchan raises his hand, his long fingers far apart. “No gambling, no alcohol, no personal information, no married women, no leaving the city. We should return in three days and meet here when the sun sets. Understood?”

“No gambling? Hyung, this is Port City, we can make so much money out of foreigners.” Seunghan pleads and then looks at Shotaro like a puppy. 

“No offence taken,” Shotaro whispers. 

“No alcohol?” Sohee is astonished. “How am I supposed to enjoy my free days? Sober?”

Sometimes, Shotaro understands why Sohee’s sister preferred her brother on a boat rather than in a pub. 

“Why do you mean by no married women?” Chanyoung asks with the tiniest voice. Wonbin gestures, asking him to come closer, and then whispers something in the student’s ear. 

“Oh,” Anton says with big eyes. “Then, single women and married men are fine?”

“Don’t argue with me, the laws of Port City are simple,” Sungchan finally speaks. “If you’re caught gambling, you’ll go to jail. If you’re messing with a married lady, the husband is allowed to kill you on the spot. If you’re caught too intoxicated in the streets or start a fight, they’ll put you in jail too. This isn’t a safe place for pirates, so we should all keep our mouths shut. If you leave the city, that’s on you, but you better be here in three days or we’ll leave without you. Those are mine and Shotaro-hyung’s free days, too. We can’t be taking care of you like babies. You’re grown men, act like it.”

“There’s a festival, it’ll be fun. We can sing, dance and eat a lot of treats.” Shotaro smiles. 

Eunseok suddenly laughs. He doesn’t explain the reason if they’re all staring at him. 

“Fine.” Seunghan raises his arm. “Let’s go.”

Now they’re rushing. Sungchan and Shotaro inspect the boat for the last time, Sohee comes and goes with Bini’s belongings, Wonbin gets the dirty things, and Seunghan wears his wooden arm. Eunseok is still at the table when Shotaro comes back. 

“Why are you still there?”

Eunseok stares at him and smiles. Shotaro’s heart skips a beat. 

“I’m waiting for you,” the cook says. 

Wonbin passes by them with Bini tied to his chest like mothers carry their baby. 

“It’s time to go,” he warns the pair. 

They leave the boat and, even from afar, the city is so bright. Shotaro hasn’t seen so much light in a while. Sungchan sets the last trap and joins them in the port. 

“Are we walking there?” Chanyoung asks. 

“Yes, it’s not that far,” Sohee says. “Just make sure you’re always next to us.”

Shotaro grabs Chanyoung and Eunseok’s wrists, forcing them to be always walking next to him. No complaint, of course. The city is crowded; it must be a special celebration because children run around, screaming, and no one stops them. Unsurprisingly, the crew draws a lot of attention while walking together, which is not a problem since the scars are covered. There are many food stands and trinkets in their way, so it creates a distraction, yet they remain on their path to the Inn. 

Junmyeon’s Inn is not for the poor. It’s inside the city, not in between towns, and it has men protecting the space in and out. It’s a big blue house that is beautiful on the outside and even more beautiful inside, with walls covered in paintings, as he is known for loving art. He’s a patron, of course, but he was also a long-time friend of Shotaro’s old crew. He was touched by the tragedy and made sure to offer his services after hearing about what happened. Unlike many other businessmen, he didn’t care that they used to be pirates.  

They walk in while being eyed by the guards at the door. If they weren’t well-dressed, they would never have crossed the threshold. 

There are guests inside, sitting on the blue couch and admiring the paintings, and the crew pass by them to get to the counter. A beautiful lady sits there and takes notes while they wait. 

“Oh.” She looks up, all smiles. “We have guests. How can I help you, gentleman?”

Sungchan puts the coin on the wooden counter. 

“We want to talk to your boss.”

She looks down, her hand against the white blouse she’s wearing as a sign of surprise. 

“I see. And who’s looking for him?”

“Old friends from the sea. He'll know.” Wonbin pulls down the collar of his black shirt to show his burn scars. 

She is unfazed: she takes the coin, smiles and bows before leaving. Sungchan turns to Chanyoung and fixes the hat that is covering part of his face. 

“There's no need to hide here.” 

Shotaro finally loosens his grip, letting the men go, but Eunseok pulls his hand back and holds it quietly. 

A beautiful man appears on the long stairs that lead to the second floor. His face is familiar, and so is his smile. 

“I'm glad you're alive and well,” Junmyeon announces. “It's been so long.” 

He rushes to them with open arms. He's the closest they have to a protector since they lost their crew. As a rich man with a lot of influence, it's nice to have his friendship. 

“Hyung.” Sungchan bows respectfully. “You look as young as we last saw you.”

He laughs, though he's really not that old. His clothes are always new and shiny, his hair is long and frames his face perfectly, and his skin is flawless. 

“Is that… is that Bini?” Junmyeon approaches the cat with big eyes. “Oh my, he's so big!” 

Bini does not recognize the businessman, but being a friendly cat, he accepts being petted right away. 

“It's been over a year,” Shotaro says. “We have to catch up.” 

“Business first,” Sungchan warns him. “How many rooms are available?” 

“Uhm, the city is crowded, so… Not many.” He looks around to see the girl who was at the counter. “How many free spots?” 

“Only four remaining,” she says as she takes her notebook. “For now.” 

“We'll take it,” Sungchan says. 

“Four rooms?” 

That seems to surprise the businessman so much that he steps back and starts counting how many are in front of him. 

“Oh. Two more faces.” He stares at Anton and then at Eunseok. “And both seem familiar somehow.”

“Yes, they probably are, but we’re not supposed to discuss that… especially here,” Shotaro says, all smiles. “Let’s just get the rooms, right? We’re staying for three days.”

“Four rooms for three days means twelve golden coins,” he is careful with his words. “Are you sure?”

“Don’t worry, hyung, we have money,” Sungchan assures him, then turns to the others. “So, who’s going to pay for a single room with that price? Chanyoung can stay with me.”

“It means three coins,” Eunseok whispers, showing the exact amount. 

 “Are you going to stay by yourself? You should save that money for new shoes and--”

“No, we’re going to share a room,” Eunseok says calmly. 

Shotaro blinks several times. Beside him, the crew is deciding the room arrangement, calculating how they can spend less. Shotaro grabs Eunseok’s hand to stop him from paying.

“Don’t waste yours.” The Captain says and takes his own coins from his own pocket. 

“I shouldn’t have received those in the first place, I didn’t do anything to earn them,” Eunseok argues softly. “ Please.”

“You have no survival instinct,” Shotaro diagnoses him, shaking his head, and then pretends he hasn’t heard anything. “Jinsu-ah, a room for me and Eunseok.”

Sungchan stares at the coins and hesitates for a second before taking them without a word. Junmyeon seems impressed with their payment. 

“I see your luck has changed. I remember when I had to cram five of you in one room and stop you from eating all my food.” He laughs fondly. “I’m sure you have great stories to tell. Are you going to stay in or venture through the city? The festival has some nice music for those who enjoy.”

“I didn’t bring my guitar.” Wonbin sighs.  

“We can stay a little longer to chat, if you have time tonight,” Sungchan says. “Some of us should not wander at night.”

And by “some of us,” he means Chanyoung.  

“I will go out for drinks,” Sohee announces. “We can talk at breakfast, hyung!”

“Ah, Sohee never changes. And I have a feeling Seunghan won’t allow him to go by himself.” Junmyeon smiles. “Isn’t that so?”

“I will enjoy the music,” Seunghan answers. “I miss it-- well, I miss everything, even walking on land.”

Junmyeon turns to Shotaro. He’s waiting. 

“Well, uhm. I’ll go out to enjoy the music and--I guess.” He glances at Eunseok, unsure if he should say anything about the cook.

“Yes.” Eunseok nods. 

“Hm, so I guess we could have a private tea and cookies,” Junmyeon suggests, turning to Sungchan. “Me, you and… what’s this gentleman’s name?”

“Lee Chanyoung,” the young man bows respectfully. 

“Oh, yes.” Junmyeon nods, somehow satisfied. “I see. Feel free to go to your accommodations, my lovely Yerim will guide you inside. I don’t think you need it… But, well.”

Shotaro isn’t sure if Junmyeon is talking about their familiarity with the place or their lack of baggage. Either way, he’s right. They don’t need guidance, but they accept it and it makes the room choice much easier (none of them wants to fight in front of a young lady). 

“Big bed, washroom, food-”

“Mine and Chanyoung’s,” Sungchan warns before she even opens the door. 

“Ah, you’re not the only one sharing!” Sohee complains. 

“You won’t even sleep here. You’ll sleep at the pub or a tavern, like the drunk you are,” Wonbin teases. “I can have one with a single bed, Miss.”

“We have two on the top floor. It’s easy to find, they’re the empty ones.” She points. 

“We can get one of them,” Eunseok says suddenly. “Sohee and Seunghan are going to sleep in a bigger room if they want.”

Shotaro is taken aback by how blunt he sounds. No one else bats an eye, but the Captain, though not a Captain on land, feels shy. Eunseok pulls him with a hand, walking out without saying anything else. They get to the second floor, which is much windier and emptier, and cross the wooden corridor being watched by old paintings in morron fancy frames. Eunseok opens a door - Shotaro has no idea how he knows it’s empty - and finds a simple room: a wide single bed, a dark closet, a door to what is probably a bathroom. No paintings hanging on the white walls, but two huge windows that beautifully show the city. 

There are fireworks in the sky when Shotaro walks in. 

“Oh. That’s nice,” he says, thinking about the fireworks. He turns back, and Eunseok hugs him. 

“Hm?” Shotaro giggles, amused. 

Eunseok rubs his face on Shotaro’s shoulder for a few seconds and throws his head back to stare at his Captain. 

“You said you wouldn’t take lovers in the sea, but now we’re on land,” Eunseok whispers. 

Shotaro just stares, heart beating faster. 

“Take me as your lover,” Eunseok requests, polite as always. 

“Close the door,” Shotaro whispers back. 

.

.

.

Chapter Text

.

Sunlight enters the room as soon as the sun rises, and Shotaro realizes that they haven’t closed the windows or the curtains. It was nice at night, when they were enjoying the music, but now he’s sleepy and tired, and he wants to rest. Eunseok’s arm and leg are on top of him, and warm lips touch his shoulder. The room is all bright and orange, and the birds are singing outside, together with the sound of people talking, because now the coldness of the night is vanishing. Soon it’ll be too hot to be touching. 

“Shotaro,” Eunseok calls, breaking the name into three syllables like he’s singing a lullaby. 

“Yes,” he answers, smiling. 

Turning to Eunseok, Shotaro is greeted with a kiss. It’s so exquisite. Eunseok kisses with an open mouth, his tongue sliding in so naturally that it is hard to refuse it. Even though the kiss is short, Shotaro can’t help but giggle into it. 

“Don’t you ever feel tired of kissing?” The Captain asks, amused. 

“No,” is the simple answer.

“Why?” 

Eunseok stares into his eyes, serious and breathtakingly beautiful.

“Because I’ve waited for too long.”

“That’s not true. You’ve kissed me every single day, and I’ve never refused you.”

“But you’re not holding back now,” Eunseok whispers. His voice gives Shotaro chills and gives him the creeps simultaneously. He turns to the cook, smiling and bumps his head affectionately. 

“You’re prettier than any lady I’ve ever seen,” Shotaro confesses, drunk on honesty. “I swear.”

“Is that true?” Eunseok asks, his delicious hehehe coming right after. 

“You didn’t enter the sea because you’re a siren, right?”

That makes Eunseok snort loudly. 

“A siren? Really?”

“I’ve got no other explanation.”

With their faces rubbing on the soft pillow, the tip of their noses touching each other, they both smile. 

“I’d like to be a siren,” Eunseok whispers again. “But I’m just a man… In fact, an almost invisible man.”

“That can’t be true.”

“Yes, it is. A servant should not be something to be seen.” He gulps. “No one ever looked at me the way you do.”

His hands wander, touching Shotaro’s body like he’s mapping it. It’s, as always, gentle but also too intimate. Shotaro would be blushing if he weren’t so focused on Eunseok’s calm, big eyes on him. 

“Why do you do that?” 

“What?”

“Keep grabbing me?” 

“Because I love to touch you. Isn't it what lovers do?” 

Shotaro ponders and giggles. 

“Isn't that a weird thing to do when we're both men?” 

“I don't think so,” Eunseok answers simply. 

Shotaro nods with his eyes barely open. It does feel good to be touched and to touch, even for just the fun of it. 

“Breakfast will be up soon,” he warns Eunseok. “The food is delicious here. We shouldn't miss it.” 

Eunseok pulls Shotaro closer and presses their forehead together. 

“I could keep you awake until that moment,” Eunseok whispers. 

“I doubt it.”

Shotaro feels overwhelmed by the amount of touching, rubbing, kissing, and —more importantly— the things they’ve done. Those things, he thought, should’ve been done only in the dark of the night, away from the eyes, fast, quick and as clean as possible. However, Eunseok is shameless with his body and his mouth as if he’s curious, not in need, and Shotaro matches his energy well. 

“If we sleep now, I’m not sure we’ll wake before dinner.”

“Then let’s go out,” Shotaro suggests. “Let’s wander.”

Eunseok hesitates for a second, but then he sits up. His body is slim but muscular, naturally tan, and his skin is soft. When he looks back at Shotaro with hair dishevelled and red lips, it feels like a fever dream.

He sits up too, almost like an impulse and hugs Eunseok tightly. Their legs are touching, tangling the sheets, and for a long minute, they don’t say a word. 

It's joy. 

“Let's go,” Shotaro mumbles, setting Eunseok free. 

They get dressed, and Shotaro realizes Eunseok is still wearing kitchen rubber shoes. They leave the hotel silently, already smelling the food, oil and spices mostly. When they walk out, there’s just the remains of a party, drunk men in the streets and workers walking around. The sun is out and it’s so hot, but they hold hands anyway. 

Shotaro points to some things. The pub, the church, a small school, and a few stores. Eunseok looks curiously, but he's not truly interested. His hand look for any part of Shotaro he can hold onto, while his eyes wander. 

“You're not very impressed, are you?” 

Eunseok looks at him. 

“Cities are pretty much the same.” He shrugged. “A bunch of houses and buildings.” 

Shotaro snorts. He is somehow entertained by how unaffected Eunseok looks all the time. 

“Don't you like cities?” 

“They're okay.”

They're walking down a hill, watching the sea at the end of it. The place is almost silent except for music far away.

“Do you like cities?” It's Eunseok's turn to ask. 

Shotaro stares at the sea. The smell of the salt surrounds them again, which is odd, now the ground is steady under his feet.

“I like the world.” Shotaro looks up at the sky. ”No matter the shape.” 

Eunseok hums. It’s warmer now, the sunlight on the top of their heads as they approach the end of the hill together. Shotaro pulls Eunseok closer, feeling a wave of affection hit him.

“Ah, Eunseok~a~ ~,” he sings cutely. “Why are you so quiet? Talk to me… I wanna know more about you…”

Eunseok smiles, a fond grin. 

“You know more about me than most people I’ve met,” he says simply. “Besides, I’m not a very interesting person.”

“To me, you are.”

Eunseok barely reacts, his body pressing against Shotaro almost shyly. 

They sit by the beach, enjoying the view of many small boats leaving to fish. It’s a warm morning, quiet and blue. Shotaro starts talking, telling a story about the last time the crew stopped there. It's a funny story, and Eunseok smiles sometimes, but his eyes seem to be far away. His mind seems to be far away.

“Ah, am I talking too much?” 

“I like to listen to you.” 

Shotaro smiles and hits him with his shoulder playfully.

“Tell me a story, too.”

“What kind of story?”

“A happy memory.”

Eunseok rubs his fingers on the sand as if he’s grounding himself and nods. Shotaro turns to him, his leg on the other man’s lap, and waits. 

“I was chubby when I was a child because the kitchen servants loved to feed me leftovers,” he starts suddenly. “But I was too small to cook yet, so they would leave me playing by the kitchen door… the kitchen backdoor. I’d spend long hours there playing with rocks and sticks.”

He takes a long moment to continue - Shotaro almost believes he’s done. 

“Lady Kim’s older sister was always there wandering, and she would pity me and take me in her arms, even complaining about my weight.” He takes a breath, smiling. “ You’re too heavy! She would say. She was nice. Her hair was long and black, so dark. And she would tell me about plants, all kinds of plants and how to use them. She was a great gardener.”

He turns to Shotaro. 

“Is that good?”

“It sounds lovely.” The Captain smiles. 

“It was.”

“Did she take care of you for a long time?”

“Oh, no. She died young. I was in school by the time she was gone.”

Shotaro feels guilty. 

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s okay. It was nice to remember her.”

“Maybe we should go back… we shouldn’t miss breakfast,” Shotaro warns him. Eunseok nods slowly, but he hesitates to get up. Shotaro stands and offers him a hand, which is taken unceremoniously. However, instead of using the help to stand up, Eunseok pulls Shotaro down to the sand. It takes a second, but as soon as Eunseok grabs him, Shotaro realizes it was on purpose - Eunseok wants to play. The men roll on the sand, and Shotaro laughs loudly as they try to immobilize each other. 

Eunseok grabs his wrist, but he won’t win against a pirate, that's for sure. Shotaro breaks free, hugs him tightly and throws him on the sand easily. 

Eunseok is smiling. He likes it. 

“Ah, you..!” Shotaro kisses him on the cheek. “Don't fight a hungry man!” 

They must dust the sand off before returning, or they won't be well received at the Inn. The smell is strong - oil, garlic and grease. Shotaro takes Eunseok by the hand, and when they enter the kitchen, they're surprised by the crew already eating at a table. Well, eating is a strong word.

Inside the baby blue kitchen, sitting at the thick dark wood table, Sungchan and Chanyoung are in front of a huge meal composed of bowls and cups. They’re talking, and, because they’re so tall and wide, it takes a moment to realize that they have another two men sitting next to them: Sohee, with his head on the table and Seunghan, resting his whole body on Sungchan’s. 

A few servers come and go with huge bowls on large chunks of wood, its thick steam decorating the space as they walk. Seunghan and Sohee look wasted, unsurprisingly, but the other guests are smiling and eating happily. There’s music, of course, there is music, because Junmyeon is not only an educated man, he loves music. A lone man plays a beautiful big instrument, the song echoing in the room, almost forgotten in the corner, and Shotaro is torn between his friends, the food and the beautiful melody. 

Eunseok guides him to the table, choosing on his behalf. The wooden chair is oddly comfortable.

“Captain,” Chanyoung exclaims. He’s so cute with his genuine affection. 

“Hope there’s food left for me,” Shotaro says playfully. “You two haven’t devoured it yet, right?”

Sungchan stares at them and sighs. 

“I’m just trying to help the drunk to eat,” he mumbles, eyes on the food. “I haven’t even tasted the food yet.”

“They’re just serving soup and noodles right now, we’re waiting for the meat,” Chanyoung explains. 

Eunseok holds a bun, inspects it and then takes a bite. He’s very elegant, even when he’s eating. 

“Is it good?” Shotaro asks.

“Well baked,” Eunseok answers.

“Where were you?” Sungchan asks. He probably knows they left the Inn for a moment. 

“We went to the beach for a while.” Shotaro takes the bun from Eunseok's hand and bites it too.  It's sweet. 

“Have you watched anything fun yesterday? We were talking to Junmyeon-hyung, and we lost track of the time.” Chanyoung pouts, but he doesn't sound very sad. 

Eunseok and Shotaro exchange glances, and it's hard not to laugh. 

“Ah… we,” Shotaro tries to say, but he fails because he giggles again. He feels like a teenager. 

“Not yet,” Eunseok says simply. 

“You're not smelling great,” Sohee points out, lifting his head for a second. 

“Look who’s speaking, the drunk.” Sungchan pulls the younger man’s ear. 

There's plenty of bread and savoury snacks. Shotaro loves the jam and the strong sauces, and he's even happier to see that Eunseok is enjoying the food. 

“Maybe we should go out together lately… all of us,” Chanyoung suggests with his natural soft voice, even softer. Poor boy must be tired of being constantly sheltered and supervised. 

“I guess if we’re together, it’ll be okay,” Shotaro suggests encouragingly. 

“Wonbin-hyung has disappeared as always,” Seunghan adds, crumbs falling down his mouth as he speaks. 

Shotaro glances at Sungchan for confirmation. 

“Bini is being cared for by Junmyeong-hyung,” the quartermaster says simply. It’s a yes. 

“He needs his break as much as we do,” the Captain nods, trying to protect his friend. “He knows Port City better than us, anyway.”

Eunseok eats quietly. 

“Are you still wearing the kitchen rubber shoes?” Sungchan asks him out of nowhere. “Hyung says they have some shoes in the back room. They're not new, but they may fit you.” 

Eunseok looks up and nods. 

“Thank you. I'll take a look,” he answers with his cheek stuffed. Shotaro can't help but grab it like he would do it with a child. 

“Cute!” 

Eunseok seems confused but pleased. 

The meal time is lovely. There’s nothing Shotaro loves more than eating with his loved ones. He's happy. 

He makes sure to help Eunseok find the back room and choose some comfortable shoes himself. Both are tired, so they choose one hastily, and Shotaro instructs Eunseok to leave a coin for the Inn to show gratitude. 

“Haven't you done this before?” 

“No,” Eunseok says. “There was a servant who bought supplies. As a cook, I only tend to the garden and the kitchen.”

“What if you had to buy something for yourself?”

“I never had to. Everything was given to me, and it was expected to last forever, I guess.”

Shotaro frowns. He truly never thought about a life with no choices. He is starting to understand why Eunseok wants a new life for himself. 

“Well, now you have coins. What do you want to buy?”

“I have everything I need right now.” 

“Argh.” 

Eunseok laughs at Shotaro's frustration, and they start playing, slapping each other playfully. 

“Let's rest, please.” Shotaro yawns. 

And they rest for the next few hours. Under the light of the sun that invades the room and falls on their sheets like a painting, Shotaro hugs a sweaty Eunseok and feels oddly happy. Content. 

Like nocturnal animals, they wake up when it's dark. A drizzle enters the room with the wind, and when Shotaro opens his eyes, Eunseok is already looking at him. 

They stare at each other in silence. It’s something in the air, the sound of music and screams outside, the fresh wind and the warm bed. There’s nothing outside, anywhere, that is better than this. Eunseok raises his hand and passes his fingers through Shotaro’s hair gently. 

“I wish I could stop time,” Shotaro mumbles. “I want to stay here with you longer…”

Eunseok smiles lazily. 

“Do we have to go?”

“Yeah. We said we would, and a true man always keeps his word. It’s in a crew activity.”

“I see.”

Despite it, they stay in bed a little more. 

“I wish I were able to see the future,” Eunseok says suddenly. 

“Why?” Shotaro asks. 

“I’d like to have seen you,” he answers quietly. “In the past, I’d like to know that I’d meet you someday. It would’ve helped me.”

The words are sweet, but the tone carries pain. 

“Helped you with what?”

“Anything.”

Shotaro feels shy, so he giggles, looking away. To his surprise, Eunseok leaves the bed slowly and stands up. 

“Let’s wash together,” he suggests. Shotaro realizes they’re definitely not clean; therefore, there’s no opposition to that. 

As with every other experience they have in private, it’s lovely and fun. Shotaro sits on the stool and starts to clean himself, but Eunseok help him with his hair and washes his head very carefully. The soap at the Inn is not like the ones they have, which are made of basically fat and leaf, no, no. The soap smells super nice, and they have this fuzzy fabric to dry themselves, so they take longer than needed. When they walk out of the room, everyone else is waiting downstairs. Not Wonbin, but that was expected. Sohee and Seunghan look decent, barely hungover. Chanyoung is wearing a hat that covers his face and simple clothes, not the fancy ones he casually wears. 

“Have you waited for too long?” Shotaro asks, worried. 

“Not as long as we would wait if we were expecting Wonbin-hyung to come,” Sohee says. “Let’s go!”

The people inside seem not to mind them. The party outside is thrilling, and they are informed that the festival won’t last as long as predicted - the store owners are opening their business the next day, hoping the visitors will buy something before they leave. That doesn’t surprise them, since Port City is mostly for trade and a common stop for ships. 

“Cover your ears. The earrings.” Sungchan approaches him, fixing Shotaro’s hair. 

“Sorry.” Shotaro smiles but he doesn’t get a smile back. 

There are fireworks in the sky, people laughing, and kids running again. Eunseok walks with the youngest part; both Sungchan and Shotaro can’t leave Chanyoung's side, so they end up in a huge pack on their way to the festival.

“Where are you all going?” A man asks.

Shotaro turns fast. Oh, yes. It's Wonbin. He's standing with a bag of candies, unaffected. 

“Hyung!” Seunghan cries, happy. “We'll listen to the music.”

“Ah.” He nods. “There will be fireworks soon, so you'd better rush.” 

“Fireworks?” Eunseok asks, frowning. “What's that?” 

“Those shiny things that explode in the sky,” Sungchan explains.

“Ah. I see, I know what that is. Isn't it dangerous?” 

“You just need to watch from afar,” Shotaro answers quickly. He wants to say he likes them, but he knows that his crew doesn't enjoy watching anything burning. 

“Maybe we should stay here,” Sungchan ponders. “If there is a crowd and fireworks near the beach, so. It's less dangerous.” 

They are more careful on land than in the sea. 

“I'll take Eunseok to watch the fireworks, then,” Shotaro announces. “Have you seen them before?” 

Eunseok shakes his head. No .

“You'll love it.” 

“I want to see it too,” Chanyoung cries. 

Sungchan takes a deep breath. 

“Let's go together.” He gives in and pulls Wonbin closer. “ Everyone .”

“I wasn't going anywhere.” Wonbin shrugs. 

The walk to the beach is not linear. They buy drinks and stop to look at the street performers. The crowd is not as big as they thought, mostly families and sailors having a good time. 

“When was the last time we attended a celebration?” Sohee genuinely asks. 

Shotaro doesn’t remember. Eunseok grabs his arm and holds his wrist and they’re holding hands by the time they reach the sand area. They’re hit by a fresh breeze, so Shotaro feels more comfortable holding Eunseok closer. 

“Don’t be scared, okay?” Shotaro smiles, pulling him even closer. “It’s really loud.”

Eunseok hugs him back and looks at the sky, his hair dancing with the wind. 

The sky is dark blue, even with the lights in the port, and when the fireworks start, it feels like the fabric of the sky is being ripped apart. Eunseok barely reacts, but Shotaro laughs when Sohee covers his ears and Wonbin winces. He looks at the fireworks again, bright lights expanding and expanding until they disappear. 

He feels so lucky. 

It’s a great night, he thinks, especially when most people walk away and the crew sits on the sand with drinks and talk and sing drunkenly. Poor Chanyoung is still covered, but he seems to be relaxed and happy. 

Before dawn, they return to the Inn. They’re all in different phases of drunkenness, so there are a lot of hugs and jokes on their way. Shotaro thinks it resembles the good time they had a while ago in their old ship with their old crew, but there’s a novelty, that’s for sure: when he goes to bed, Eunseok is with him, and so are his never-ending kisses. 

The sun is rising when they are ready to sleep and it’s going to be too hot to cuddle again. 

“Did you enjoy the night?” Shotaro asks, sleepy and drunk. 

Eunseok laughs quietly. 

“Yes. It was fun.”

And here it comes, another soft kiss. 

“Stop that.” Shotaro scoffs. “Let’s nap so we don’t miss breakfast.”

Eunseok nods and then hugs Shotaro closer. 

“I’m happy,” Shotaro whispers before falling asleep. 

Unfortunately, they miss breakfast. The strong sunlight that wakes Shotaro up also tells that it’s around noon already. He’s covered in sweat, so he wipes his face and sits up, stretching.  

His stomach complains as soon as his brain realizes he has to find food now. He turns to the side to wake Eunseok up and finds an empty spot instead. He looks around, confused, and finds only Eunseok’s rubber shoes, Shotaro’s clothes - now folded -, and golden coins next to it. 

Shotaro’s heart is about to jump out of his chest. He feels nervous out of the sudden, and he laughs it off, then fully panics, leaving the bed to get his clothes. He is still getting dressed when he checks the washing area and opens the door. He doesn’t know why he feels so nervous as he walks around, tripping on the carpet and putting his shirt on. At least there’s no other host on the floor to see him like that. 

He reaches the stairs and he’s about to run down to the floor below when he notices Eunseok doing the opposite. He’s going up the stairs calmly, and he looks at Shotaro, confused. 

They stare at each other. Shotaro’s anxiousness dissolves into a smile. 

“Where were you?” The Captain asks, releasing his tension. 

Eunseok looks at his own hands - he’s holding something -, then at Shotaro. 

“I woke up and breakfast was over, so I asked them if I could cook something for us,” he answers. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” Shotaro says, yet he grabs Eunseok as soon as the cook approaches him. 

Eunseok stares, concerned. 

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Just--just warn me if you leave the room, right? Wake me up if you have to.”

Eunseok nods. 

“Sorry. I thought I would be here before you wake up.” 

Shotaro sighs and giggles, feeling embarrassed. He helps Eunseok with he pot he’s carrying and closes the room door after walking in. 

“What’s that?”

“Nothing too special,” the cook says. “I worked with leftovers.”

Inside the pot, a thick soup and a smaller pot is floating on it. It’s such a cute way to keep the toast safe and dry inside that Shotaro giggles. 

“Ah, so nice…”

They don’t have any utensils, so they share the smaller pot as they drink the soup, both sitting on the floor. 

“Do you cook this often?” Shotaro asks, wiping his mouth as he passes the pot back to Eunseok. 

“Yes, but not… this. Making a soup of leftovers is a way to ensure the servants will have enough to eat, yet the ingredients change. I cook with whatever is left.”

“So you cook for the servants too?”

“I used to. Some of them only really eat at night, so they must have something substantial as a meal.”

“And for the nobles? What do you cook?”

“Always the same breakfast, but dinner changes depend on the occasion.”

“Two meals only?”

“No, they eat throughout the day, but they inform me what they want to eat.”

“And you must cook anything?”

“Yes.”

“You must be very skilled, then.”

“I am.”

Shotaro keep asking questions about the food and the routine of a Noble family. Eunseok answers everything patiently, his tone gentle and contained. 

“I see why you don’t worry about money… you can get a good job anywhere, right?”

Eunseok nods. 

“Does a pirate need a job?” He asks Shotaro suddenly. 

“Sometimes.”

“Don’t they simply steal?”

“No. You can’t steal anywhere or anytime. This is how you get murdered… sometimes you have to blend in… temporarily… and act normally to not draw attention to yourself.”

Eunseok stops for a moment, processing the information.

“I’m not a pirate anymore,” Shotaro says quickly. “I have done bad things in the past, but we don’t do this anymore.”

“Have you killed someone?” Eunseok asks. 

Shotaro is surprised by the question. He stares at the pot, slightly ashamed. 

“Yes. I had to.”

“It’s fine,” Eunseok says. “That’s how life is.”

Somehow, that eases the older man’s shame. Yes, life is hard. It is what it is. 

“Have you?” Shotaro asks, almost smiling. It feels silly to ask that of a servant. 

“Not on purpose,” Eunseok answers. 

“What?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Eunseok says simply. “Some things are better buried. We all have secrets to keep.”

Shotaro is curious, and he wants to ask more, but he also has many secrets to keep. He may have confessed some of his shameful actions, but not all of them. 

“You’re right. We should talk about good things.” 

Shotaro gives the pot back to Eunseok, but it seems like both are satisfied. Eunseok puts the empty vessels on the table and then sits next to Shotaro when the Captain leans on the bed. 

They stare at the window. 

“What do you want to do today?” The older man asks. 

“Be with you.”

“Ah, you will be with me! What else, I mean.”

“I don’t mind… whatever you want seems nice.”

Shotaro pulls Eunseok closer, and Eunseok, of course, turns his head and steals a kiss. 

“You don’t want to do anything, do you?”

“No. The world outside doesn’t matter to me.”

“Let’s stay inside until we get hungry again,” Shotaro agrees.

They make it to the bed, and it feels odd now that it’s clear and they have to see each other under the daylight invading the room. Eunseok asks quietly, 

“Can I take your clothes off?”

Shotaro nods and laughs, nervous, obliging when the other man raises his arms and legs. He doesn’t ask for permission, but he does the same to Eunseok until they’re both naked. 

They stare at each other in silence. It makes Shotaro even more nervous. 

“I understand it now,” Eunseok whispers. 

“What? You understand… what?”

“What people say about love. It feels like a curse.”

Shotaro doesn’t understand what that means, but he gets stuck on the word ‘love’ because he is a person who is full of it, but this is a new kind of love. It’s warm and fiery, and it makes his skin crawl. 

He hopes this night never ends. 

.

.

Chapter Text

PART II

.

Jung Sungchan heard a lot about pirates before meeting them. 

When he was a kid, his favorite book was about ‘the criminals of the sea’, but his mother wouldn’t allow him to read it by himself. Someone, often a servant, had to sit next to his bed and read it for him. In the beginning, Lady Jung didn’t allow those books before bedtime, but his father advocated for ‘education for men’. He argued that Sungchan was, yes, still small, but he had to be prepared to become a man who would, one day, protect his family. 

Well, Sungchan wasn’t ready to protect his family when they were murdered a few years later, just days before his twelfth birthday. He didn’t understand what was going on at all because he was asleep. Isn’t that curious? The first family trip he ever took was on an amazing ship with a room all to himself and unlimited playtime. He remembers running on the deck and thinking how boring life was back home, in his dark, huge house full of delicate ceramics and old paintings. Studying, fencing, copying, shooting, counting, exercising, and church. Life at the sea was much more fun. The youngest one is having a blast , and the staff at the ship laughed. His mother insisted on keeping the same bedtime hour, so poor Sungchan had to sleep early.

He woke up and he was being tied by ugly-looking men, with scars and rotten teeth. They put a sack over his head and laughed so loud it hurt his ears. For a couple of days, all he did was cry and ask for his family. You don’t have a family anymore, boy. They would laugh if he peed in his pants and didn’t allow him to change his clothes. They didn’t feed him, but one pulled the sack high enough to shove water down his throat a few times. You better not die. The ship smelled horridly, a smell of putrid trash, rotten food. 

He started missing his boring life. School, church, several trainings and the gentle people in the streets. His colorful books, his annoying older brother, and the servants. He didn’t like the sea anymore. 

When he heard different voices, they came with yelling. Sungchan vaguely understood that there was a fight going on. Gunshots, metallic sounds, raw screams. He didn’t move - it was so quick! He smelled gunpowder and blood when it was finally over. 

“Hm, Captain. They have prisoners,” a voice said. 

Footsteps. They uncovered his head. 

“Shit!” A man stared at him, shocked. “It’s a child.”

Sungchan looked around and watched the man around him. They were mostly older teenagers, but unlike Sungchan, who was smaller and thinner than the boys his age, they were muscular and tall. 

A man walked down the stairs, and that’s how the boy understood he was in something like a basement. 

“Taeyong, ask Sehun to bring the one who’s still alive,” the man said, and then he set his eyes on Sungchan. “Oh, my. What do we have here?”

He approached Sungchan and squatted next to him. He was beautiful, which made Sungchan feel more nervous. 

“Hello, who are you?”

Sungchan didn’t answer. He swallowed hard. The other pirates - yes, they were unequivocally pirates, with their raggedy attires and guns, - laughed. 

“Don’t worry. We aren’t nasty like those shitheads, accepting money to hurt kids.” The man spat on the floor, angry for a second. “You shouldn’t be afraid.”

Sungchan wasn’t afraid. He was nervous. 

“Jung Sungchan,” he mumbled. “I’m from Capital City.”

“He looks rich,” a guy said, looking closer. “Maybe it has to do with the bodies we found.”

“Yuck, you can even smell it from here,” another added. 

“Bodies?” Sungchan repeated, finally afraid. “Where’s my family? Have you seen--”

“How old are you, Sungchan?” The beautiful pirate asked. “Don’t listen to them. I’m talking to you.”

“I’m almost twelve,” he whispered. 

“Oh, he’s not much younger than Haechannie,” A voice said. 

The beautiful pirate moved his head, signalling something, and a couple of others started to untie Sungchan. 

“My name is Jongin, but everyone calls me Kai.” He smiles. “Do you have any idea of why those guys kept you here?”

Sungchan shook his head. 

“I see.” Jongin stood up. “Where the hell is Sehun…”

Another pirate ran upstairs while Sungchan was feeling the pain of moving again; his muscles ached, and his legs went weak as he stood up. He wasn’t smelling great either. 

“This guy is too heavy,” a man complained while two others were helping him bring down a huge bleeding pirate. 

They threw the big man on the floor and sighed in unison. Sungchan recognized the disgusting pirate on the floor, bleeding in front of him. 

“Where’s my family?” Sungchan trembled. 

The man wasn’t listening, so Jongin kicked him hard in the knee, and blood spilled on the floor. 

“Are you alive or not?” 

The pirate grunted. Jongin took a small gun from his pocket and pointed at the bleeding pirate. 

“What the hell were you sickos going to do with a child?”

The pirate coughed blood, tainting his long, grey beard. He tried to sit up, which startled the others, but he could barely move.

“They paid us to kill the family. Good money. Easy Job.” He said, finally, eyes closed. 

“They who?” Jongin asked. 

“Rich guy from the city. A lawyer.” The pirate finally opened his eyes. 

“Why did you keep the kid alive then?” Jongin asked now, sounding concerned. 

“The guy wanted to access the money,” the man explained, barely struggling now. “He needed a living heir to have the right to touch it… he asked for the youngest.”

The pirates were silent for a moment. Sungchan didn’t move. 

“And they call us monsters,” one whispered. 

Jongin put his gun down and shook his head. 

“You shouldn’t call yourselves pirates if you’re serving those damn sick people.” He turned to Sungchan and leaned so they could be at the same eye level. “Do you know anyone who would pay to get rid of your father? Do you know who the lawyer is?”

Sungchan knew a couple of lawyers who worked with his father. He nodded. 

“Give me your hand,” Jongin said. 

Sungchan extended as if he was going to get a handshake, but instead, Jongin put the gun there and waited until Sungchan held it. 

The crew made sounds of amusement. 

“Do you know how to shoot?”

Sungchan nodded. 

“Kill him,” Jongin said with the gentlest smile. “He killed your family. You have the right to do it.”

Sungchan didn’t even have the time to process the information that his family was, in fact, gone. His body acted on its own, and he shot a bullet through the man’s head immediately, watching it part in pieces, meat, blood and bone all over the floor. 

There was one second of silence before the loud shrieking exploded. The pirates were celebrating - one held Sungchan like he was a doll. So fast! No hesitation! That was a good shot, boy!

The gun fell on the floor. Sungchan was confusedly passed around by happy pirates. 

“Enough,” Jongin said, giggling. “Take what is worth and let’s move.”

They didn’t allow Sungchan to see his family; a pirate - he introduced himself as Taeyong - held him against his chest, covering his face as the other pirates got rid of the bodies. They’re not in a good state. Don’t worry. We’ll sail a boat with their belongings to be found, so they get a proper funeral. You’ll meet them someday. Life is temporary, but family is forever. 

.

.

.

It took only a year for Sungchan to become one of the tallest men in the ship. He grew too fast, both physically and emotionally. When he was in Capital City, he was sheltered, but on the ship, everything was clear. There was nothing to hide and nothing to fear. 

Sungchan, despite being one of the youngest and coming from an affluent background, proved to be a great mate onboard. He would do anything: clean, cook, fish and even things that were hard for the other mates, like writing and counting. Since he was taught languages in his house, he was able to speak to the foreign pirates. He had a same-aged friend from the same place they called “Mainland”, Chenle, and Sungchan were among the few who could understand him, so they would spend a lot of time together. He was also close to Haechan, who was the one who took care of the children like them. He wasn’t much older, but he was born and raised on a boat, and he had experience. 

Living with pirates was fun. It was noisy and he had no privacy, but it was enjoyable. They would eat, sleep and play together. Even when there was a fight, it would be entertaining for the whole group in the end. They had no issues at sea, and the stops were full of small adventures. 

Sungchan was still grieving, fully crying at night while pretending to be asleep. He didn’t want the other pirates to see his pain as weakness. Everything was changing fast; therefore, he had to adapt, no matter how painful it was to accept that his old life and his family were forever gone. 

He would seek guidance from the other pirates often. He could confide in Haechan and Chenle, that’s for sure, but he needed older and wiser words from the pirates. His eagerness to learn gave him a good reputation, and he was well loved by his mates. He looked up to Captain Kai the most and would take any opportunity to talk to the pirate. 

“See.” Kai pointed at a drawing on the map. “We’re here… and we’re heading to the Island… here.”

“How do you know we’re here?” Sungchan asked, biting and chewing some dry meat - he was always hungry. “If I look at the window, I only see water.”

Kai giggled. 

“We don’t know exactly, but it’s around here. We’ve been sailing north for a day since we saw that piece of land… that’s how I know. Finding yourself in the ocean is always about counting time and direction.”

Sungchan nodded frantically. 

“Why are we going to the Island?”

“Yuta wants to see his land before it closes its doors.”

“Close…? The entire land will close?”

“Yes. It’ll close the gates around the Island, and foreigners like us won’t be welcomed there. Not even their people will be able to leave… with some exceptions, I guess.”

Sungchan’s eyes were wide. 

“Does it mean we can enter there before it closes?”

“If we’re fast enough.” Kai looked up, staring at the sky. “It’s not a long trip, after all. What do you know about the Island?”

“I know the language a little bit. My dad also taught me about the people and their habits,” Sungchan said enthusiastically, then his smile faded. Kai stared at him knowingly. 

“You know, Sungchannie.” He moved closer to the boy, who was now around his height. “We can go back to Capital City after this trip, and you can go home if you want to. You’re growing up fast, and I’m sure you can take care of yourself.”

“I don’t want to,” Sungchan averted his gaze. Home meant his family; he only had an empty house waiting for him. 

“I’m just saying. Many of the men here have no place to be but the ship.” Kai crossed his arms, sighing. “You have a home and a legacy name. You could go back anytime and get yourself a nice job, get married, and have kids."

Sungchan wasn’t even fourteen yet, so he blushed at the thought. Kai found it hilarious. 

“Not now! In the future, I mean.”

“No, Captain. I’m happy here.” Sungchan rubbed his boots on the floor. “Besides, is it possible to stop being a pirate and become a common man?”

“I hope so,” Kai confided. “It’s a dream of mine.”

Many pirates in the ship had absurd dreams. Find a treasure or buy land or have their crew and many boats, and some, of course, wanted to get married and have kids. Sungchan didn’t dare to dream far at that time, but it was nice to know he didn’t have to be a pirate forever if he didn’t want to. 

When Yuta visited his land, they allowed a few men to walk with him, but not Sungchan. The poor boy argued he could be a good translator, but they wouldn’t let him leave the ship or get into fights yet. Kids in the ship. 

Sungchan sat by the boarding ladder, looking at the port with anticipation. He wanted to be on land and see it with his own eyes. Some pirates took pity on him and left only to come back with treats for the kids, but food was not enough to satisfy Sungchan’s curiosity.

Taeyong came back to the ship with a couple of kids. 

“This one is for Kun.” He pushed a random kid in. “We don’t understand what he says. He’s from the Mainland.”

“Another one,” Kun complained, always being assigned kids to take care of.

Taeyong sighed deeply. 

“Gotta warn the Captain that Yuta isn’t leaving the country soon. He wants to stay for a while.”

“But can he leave it at all?” Sehun asked. 

“He said he will find a way. You know him.” Tayeong shrugged. “That means this one is under my responsibility… but hell, I’m not great with the language too… Where’s Sungchannie?”

Sungchan jumped up and ran fast - he was never assigned anything relevant. 

“Yes!”

“He is Shotaro.” Tayeong pointed at the boy he was holding by the hand. “He’s a friend of Yuta, and he’s joining the crew. He doesn’t speak our language, so I need you to help us.”

Sungchan nodded. 

“Shotaro is older, but now he is thirteen like you, and he has some education, right? He went to school like you. He comes from a fisherman lineage, so he knows something about the sea,” Taeyong explained slowly. “He is a hard worker. Please help me take care of him.”

Sungchan stared at the boy. He was as tall as Taeyong, his hair was light brown, and his skin was tan - he was probably working under the sun. His face was cute, and he was smiling sweetly as if he wasn’t joining a dangerous group of pirates. 

“Nice to meet you,” Shotaro said with a heavy accent. “Sungchan-i.”

Sungchan smiled shyly.

“Show him around and talk about the rules,” Taeyong said. “I gotta talk to the Captain.”

Shotaro dropped Tayeong’s hand and immediately took Sungchan’s hand. The poor boy went red immediately when their fingers interlaced. 

“The ru-rules-” Sungchan tried to say in the Island’s language, but he stuttered. “The main… The main rules.”

He forgot the rules. He forgot the language. He didn’t even know where he was. 

.

.

.

The following year was quiet until Captain Kai announced he was retiring. 

Pirates didn’t retire, but he found love in a small city and only came back to the ship to say goodbye. Sehun didn’t want to stay without his best friend, but he had a lover in Port City and family in Capital City, so he left at the next stop. The crew sat together and decided Taeyong was the next in line to be the Captain. He wasn’t the oldest or the most experienced, but he was the most respected and liked by the crew. Some people in the ship didn’t like each other, but everyone liked him. 

It was a difficult moment for Sungchan, but he endured with the help of his friends. 

He and Shotaro grew much closer, becoming best friends quickly. Shotaro was smart and quick, and they would teach each other’s language all the time. Every morning, they would wake up together and eat; they were given the same tasks and then spent the whole day together until bedtime. 

When Sungchan turned fourteen, Shotaro gave him a book. When Shotaro turned fifteen, Sungchan gave him new earrings. They didn’t have much money, except for their share in the lootings, which was enough for two teenagers who barely left the ship. They had to train every day but couldn’t fight; they had to have pierced ears and guns, but were not allowed to identify as pirates if they left the ship. Most of the time, they had tasks and time to spend together, and that was it. 

One day, Sungchan told Shotaro what happened to his family, and that was the first time he cried in front of someone about it. Shotaro just held him, saying nothing. 

They had a special bond. 

“We’ll leave tonight to celebrate at the pub,” Taeyong warned one night when they stopped at a city. “Can I trust you with the ship and the kids?”

“I’ll defend them with my life, Captain,” Shotaro said proudly and unfortunately, way too cutely. 

“That’s my baby.” Taeyong petted his head happily.

“Captain, when will we be able to join you?” Sungchan asked, frustrated. 

The other pirates heard it and made funny sounds. He’s a grown-up now! He wants to drink! Do you want to flirt with the ladies, Jinsu?

Sungchan swallowed hard. Taeyong giggled. 

“It takes more than height and blood in your hands to be a man, Sungchan,” Taeyong said. “One day you’ll understand. Don’t let Jaehee go to bed without a bath, that boy is stinking.”

Another night as parents , he thought. He wasn’t mad about it. Kids would come and go from the ship, mostly lost kids and orphans who, unlike him, had no future or name. It felt bad to curse them when it was one of the rules on the ship that kids had to stay in. 

“If we’re kids, why are we taking care of other kids?” Sungchan complained as he and Shotaro helped the younger boys with their washing. 

“We’re taking care of the ship,” Shotaro argued. “That’s a big thing.”

“You’re too kind, Taro.” Sungchan pouted. 

“We have time. One day we’ll join them,” Shotaro smiled. He was too patient, too kind. Inside the ship, no one would dare to make fun of him or play pranks on him. Shotaro was strong but so gentle and selfless that sometimes Sungchan had to intervene. This is your food. Stop feeding Wonbinnie, he simply doesn’t want to eat. 

The other kids slept all together, but Sungchan and Shotaro shared a mattress and a blanket. 

When the crew left, they had to be alone on the deck, on the lookout. 

“You don’t even like to drink that much,” Shotaro teased him, slapping Sungchan’s unprotected arm. “Do you want to look at ladies?”

It was hard to see women when they were stuck in a ship with tons of men. They were both reaching puberty, and they were curious about the opposite gender.

“I just want to go out,” he confessed. “I’m almost fifteen!”

Shotaro laughed. Under the dark sky, his eyes were sparkly and kind. It was a warm night. 

“What do you want for your birthday?”

“Go to a pub.”

“Go to a pub,” Shotaro repeated, throwing back his head to stare at the stars. “What do you think they do there in the pub?”

“Drink, sing, start fights, you know, the usual.”

“We can do that here.”

“Then we have to watch the kids. I don’t want to. I want to go out.” Sungchan complained, “They have better drinks, good meat… do you know they put meat inside bread? I used to always eat it in Capital City.”

“Oh,” Shotaro was impressed. He came from a humble family, so he didn’t know much about different foods.

“And they have live music with instruments and everything, and you can talk to different people, and you can, I don’t know, kiss someone on the mouth!”

“On the mouth?!” Shotaro was scandalized. “Why?”

“I don’t know. It must be nice to do it. I saw it once at a party in my house.”

They went silent. The sea was angry, but the ship was anchored and tied. Sungchan thought about his family.

“Would you stop being a pirate one day and start a family?” He asked. 

“Maybe,” Shotaro said. 

“You say that to anything I ask.”

“I’m open-minded. How about you, then?”

“I think about it.” He gulped, staring at the far city lights. “One day, maybe. I want to have my own bed, too.”

Shotaro slapped him playfully. They laughed. 

“I just don’t want to live forever in one place,” Shotaro affirmed. “But if I had a wife who would sail with me, I’d do it.”

“Women don’t like those things. They want a hard-working husband who goes home every night, goes to church, and is good for the kids.”

“Who told you that?”

“My mother.”

“Your mom was a noble woman, of course, she wouldn’t want to sail. My best chances are common women,” Shotaro said simply. 

“Why? You’re handsome and nice. Any girl would like you.”

“Well, I’m a foreigner and I’m poor. I’m just being realistic.”

“Don’t say that. I don’t like it.”

“It’s not like I’ll marry someday. Most pirates here don’t, so…” Shotaro shrugged. “What I want is to see the world. That’s more important.”

“Most pirates here will die at sea,” Sungchan said - and he was just repeating words from other mates. “We could leave.”

Shotaro nods. 

“I’d go anywhere with you,” he said to Sungchan with a smile. 

.

.

.

When the ship was attacked, Sungchan’s task was to hide the kids. Now, they had only three with them: Sion, Wonbin and Seunghan. He pushed them downstairs and looked for Shotaro, but it was hard when men were bumping into him from left to right. He locked the three in the deepest room and took his gun, pointing at everyone who came near. 

They were fighting on the deck; the other pirate ship was able to damage the ship, and then the pirates landed there soon. Sungchan was so nervous holding the door, his hand was trembling. He couldn’t lose his family again. 

The screams, the gun shots, and the blood brought him terrible memories, but he was standing still. 

Someone appeared, and Sungchan was ready to shoot when he realized it was Shotaro. His familiar figure appeared under the lights through the cracks in the ceiling. Yellow shirt, his short brown hair, and his kind eyes. 

“Sungchan,” he mumbled. He had blood on his clothes, and it sent Sungchan into a panic attack. 

“Are you hurt? Are you hurt?” He screamed, grabbing Shotaro. 

“No.” Shotaro smiled. “Those dudes were such an easy fight, attacking us in the light of the day… It’s over.”

“It’s over…?” Sungchan looked up. The noises were still loud. 

“We’re moving to their ship, I guess,” Shotaro said. “It’s better than ours. Bigger, I meant.”

Sungchan’s body relaxed. Shotaro held his face, worried, and then smiled again.

“We're fine.” He chuckled. 

“Did you kill one of those bastards?” Sungchan sniffed and smiled. 

“Severely harmed!” Shotaro raised one finger - he heard that expression recently. 

“That's a no.”

“Yeah.”

.

.

.

On Sungchan's sixteenth birthday, he woke up and Shotaro wasn't near him. A few pirates stayed in the ship to look after the kids, so Sungchan was all alone in the mattress and the room.

The new ship was much bigger and older. It was actually a fancy ship with many rooms, so sometimes Sungchan and Shotaro could put the kids in one of the lowest levels in a bed.

Sungchan was hungover. He went to a few pubs, and at some points, he swore Shotaro was with him (he was too drunk to keep track). He didn't know how he got home safely. 

The door opened, and light came in. 

“Wake up, birthday boy!” Haechan's pretty face appeared. 

Sungchan grunted, but he sat up anyway. 

“How are you feeling today?” Haechan stood by the door, crossing his arms. “Did you drink? Punch someone? Seduce married ladies?”

“Last night? Unfortunately not. I think I just drank a lot.” He smiled.  “Don't worry. I'll do it tonight. You could come with me, too.” 

“For what?” 

Sungchan tapped the empty side of the mattress. 

“Come here, I'll show you.” 

Haechan feigned shock, and Sungchan laughed out loud. 

“You used to be so cute and pure… now you're a menace.” He put his hands in his pockets and then took something from them. 

He threw whatever it was at Sungchan.

“Your birthday gift.”

Sungchan looked at his lap and saw… glasses. They were big, the brown frames almost square. Sungchan measured them before putting them on.

“So you stop complaining it's hard to read. I hope it helps,” Haechan said. 

Sungchan hadn't noticed he wasn't seeing as good as usual, but it was hard to deny the glasses made him see everything clearly. 

“Ah, thank you.” Sungchan melted a little bit. Everyone was just so kind to him on his birthday; it was his favorite time of the year. 

“Where's your other half?” Haechan frowned.

He meant Shotaro.

“He was with me at the pub… I don't know. Isn't he around?”

“I haven't seen him today yet.”

Sungchan stretched, feeling dizzy. He extended his hand to his hyung. 

“Help me get up…”

Haechan stared at the big hand waiting for his move. 

“That's an old technique. I know what you want to do, I won't fall for it, you pervert.” 

Sungchan laughed, watching the door slam loudly. He left the room to wash his face and his teeth and to look for Shotaro. He bumped into Wonbin.

“Have you seen Taro?” Sungchan asked the boy.

Wonbin shook his head. No. 

“Do you need something?”

Wonbin raised his hand and showed him a cute necklace with a carved rock. 

“For me?” Sungchan pointed at himself. The boy nodded, and as soon as Sungchan held the necklace, he ran away. 

Seunghan gave Sungchan a warm hug, then some candy. From the whole crew, Sungchan got another night at the pub - Kun promised he would keep an eye on the kids. Sungchan went looking for Chenle and found out it was he who brought the drunk birthday boy home. 

“Ah, thank you.” Sungchan blushed. “Weren’t Shotaro and YangYang with us?”

Chenle was eating snacks and cleaning the kitchen, a rag in his hand, while his eyes wandered. 

“At some point…I think YangYang is back, though.”

“Is he? Hm. How about Taro?” 

“I haven’t seen him yet.”

Sungchan started to worry. Shotaro never missed a big meal, and it was almost time for dinner. Sungchan felt lost without his best mate, and it was even worse when no one gave him anything to do since it was his special day. Sungchan picked a book he had stolen and tested his new glasses. He felt emotional, somehow, thinking about how his father used to wear one too. 

It didn’t distract him enough. He felt sad and lonely, which was odd. Everyone went out of their way to make him happy and show him love. He had no doubt he was not alone. He had a beautiful family. 

He lay down in bed and thought. The door opened. 

“Ah, he’s here, he’s here,” Shotaro said, smiling, seeming to be talking to someone else as he walked in. 

Sungchan sat up, startled. 

“It’s almost night time, where were you?” 

Shotaro looked at him and smiled. He looked sleepy but clean; he wasn’t in a fight or danger, it seemed.

“I brought you something,” he said proudly, closing the door. 

He knelt in front of Sungchan and gave him something wrapped in a linen rag. Sungchan took it, but kept staring, waiting for an answer. 

“I did a lot of stuff.” Shotaro giggled. “But I was able to get you that, too. Open it, please.”

Sungchan opened it and found his favorite snack: a large slice of meat inside a thick, warm bread. It smelled great, and he only realized it when he looked at it. 

“Thank you,” he whispered. 

“What's wrong?” Shotaro asked. 

“That's a nice gift… but I'd rather have you around next time.” Sungchan sighed. 

“I'll go to the pub with you tonight,” Shotaro said.

“Well, this time, come back home with me,” Sungchan asked. “Don't disappear and leave me alone.” 

Shotaro nodded, serious. 

“I'm sorry.” 

.

.

.

.

The next time Shotaro brought him his beloved snack, Sungchan was in bed. 

Not his bed. 

He was in a hospital bed, stuck on land, his leg completely wrapped in thin medical fabric. They had those large rooms with beds next to each other, and many nurses walking around during the morning. At night, they would give some meds to the patients who weren't in critical condition, and they would fall into a deep sleep. It was Sungchan’s second night there, and, for the second night, the dosage was not enough. Maybe he was too big, maybe he simply didn't react to it. While everyone was deep asleep, he stared at the ceiling and worried. 

It was a wooden ceiling, the same wood as in the bed and in the huge square glassless windows. He had no distractions, nothing to think about besides the horrors he went through. Sometimes he sat up and checked if Wonbin was still in the same room, fully sedated with a bandaged neck and shoulders. 

The nurses didn't come at night. If anyone wanted something, they had to get up and ask for help. 

Sungchan heard a noise and watched, confused, as a person climbed through the window. 

It was Shotaro. He jumped inside of the room and looked around, trying to find them. Sungchan sat up and waved. 

Shotaro smiled. Sungchan felt a wave of relief through his body. 

“They're really sleeping,” Shotaro whispered, approaching his bed. 

“Sedated.”

“Oh.” Shotaro nodded and then looked at the other boy's body under the sheets. “How's the leg?” 

“They cut a piece--the dead skin.” Sungchan gulped, remembering the pain. “The bone is fine, so I'll be able to do everything, just… I'm going to have some scars. It'll be weaker than the other one, I think.” 

Shotaro listened carefully. He was wearing the same clothes they arrived with. It hit Sungchan that he probably hadn't bathed or had a full meal or slept yet, unlike them.  

“And Bina?” 

“Mostly superficial burns, they said. He's going to have ugly scars and that's all.”

Shotaro glanced at the other beds for a second. 

“How's Seunghan?” Sungchan asked this time. They took him somewhere else as soon as they arrived. 

“He went through surgery.” Shotaro gulped. “They cut his left arm off.” 

Sungchan was speechless for a moment. 

“The whole arm?” 

“The whole arm, but he'll survive.” 

Shotaro petted Sungchan's head gently, waiting. It takes time to fully process what happened.

“Where were you?” 

Shotaro leaned in, and it was useless when everyone was sleeping, to whisper. 

“I was able to trace down our older quartermaster. He can't be associated with any piracy because he's now part of the government.”

“Sehun?” Sungchan mouthed. 

“Yes. It was hard. We should pretend we don’t know him… He owed Taeyong a favor, and that's why he is helping us, but we can never tell who did it. He got me some coins, and he's finding us a place soon. Things are not bad.”

“Did you tell him what happened?” 

Shotaro sighed, looking down. 

“I saved some details. He knows about the fire and about what happened to us. I mean, we don’t know what truly happened and how many...” 

Shotaro stopped talking. There was a noise, and he threw himself on the floor right before the security man walked in to check on them. Sungchan fell back on the bed and waited, listening to Shotaro moving on the floor. That was the moment Sungchan smelled something good. The guy left as he was supposed to, and a long minute passed before Shotaro stood up again. 

“Do you have food?” Sungchan asked. He was hungry. They fed him the same amount as the others, a bowl of soup and bread, but he was just a guy who ate a lot. They didn’t allow seconds.

“Of course.” Shotaro smiled, pulling the bag that he liked to carry attached to his body. “Got you some meat.”

He opened the bag and took the fabric wrap happily. Sungchan held the snack, already tearing up. The happy memories he associated with eating out and having fun hit him. 

Shotaro just petted his head. He knew what that meant. 

“Have you eaten?” He asked Shotaro. 

“I’ve had something. This one is for you.”

Sungchan didn’t care. He parted the food into two and gave half to Shotaro. 

“Eat with me,” he begged, moving slightly to the side so Shotaro would sit next to him. “Please.”

Shotaro complied silently. His warmth next to Sungchan’s tired body reminded the younger man that they had each other. Not everything was lost. 

.

.

.

“I think it’s the first time you've told me the whole story,” Junmyeon says. He has his book and a small cat sitting on his lap. It’s Bini, Wonbin’s cat. They got him in the streets, an abandoned kitten; Shotaro believed having a pet would help Wonbin with his recurrent nightmares. 

“Well, now I know you’re a true friend,” Sungchan retorts, still staring at the shelves where Junmyeon keeps his books. 

“That can’t be true. How about the other times we met?”

“You were kind, but kindness doesn’t make one a friend.”

“How am I being a friend now?”

Sungchan looks back and stares at the other two men in the room. Chanyoung is on the floor, quiet. It’s the first time he’s fully aware of the crew’s past, and his eyes are red. He is such a gentle soul. 

“By being fair,” Sungchan answers. “You see us as equals and not poor boys in need of help.”

“You’re not boys anymore.” He looks at Chanyoung on the floor. “Not even this one, despite his young age. Did you tell him how you paid for the ship?”

“No. It was dirty money.” Sungchan sighs. “Even the money I took from my family’s house, I don’t even feel like it belonged to me.”

Chanyoung reacts, blinking. 

“Have you come back to your family’s house?”

“Once, at night. Only to steal,” Sungchan confesses. “The best robber is the one who lived in the house, I guess. No one saw me and the money I took… I don’t think anyone knew my brother had put it there. It was his savings, not as much as it sounds. He planned to start a business.”

“It is yours by right,” Junmyeon protests, shaking a cup of tea like it is a bottle of rum. 

“It doesn’t matter. We all worked hard for our ship, and it was a terrible time. I don’t like to remember it.” 

Seunghan had to adapt to his body again, Wonbin never smiled, and Shotaro was barely there, becoming increasingly distant as he became the untitled leader of the group. 

“We’re happy now,” Sungchan says. “And that’s all that matters.”

He touches a book, but he’s still unsure if it’s the one. Junmyeon offered one to each of the men in the room, so Sungchan must pick it carefully. Just one. 

“You don’t seem that happy,” Chanyoung says. It’s weird to think he’s only around for a month or so. 

“I’ve noticed it too. You don’t even want to go out,” Junmyeon agrees. “What happened?”

Sungchan sighs. He has now spent half of his life as a seaman, and he’s starting to feel hopeless about the future. 

“We’re in the middle of a delivery. It’s not resting time yet.”

“Or maybe it has to do with Eunseok-hyung.” Chanyeol smiles knowingly. 

“Oh.” Junmyeon nods. “ The new guy?”

“He’s not new. Just like Chanyoung, he’s staying for a ride--but he’s not a job. He just… appeared. He’s actually a good mate to be around, so I’m not sure what he has to do with me.” Sungchan grabs a book randomly. 

 “Hyung is jealous,” Chanyoung whispers. 

“I’m n--not--” Sungchan turns back to glare at the boy, then he retreats, sensing he’s about to stutter, and focuses on the book in his hands. Geography of The Modern World. 

Junmyeon laughs. 

“Has Shotaro found himself a new best mate?”

“Worse,” Sungchan admits. “They’re… well. Among pirates, we had hm, other terms. They are getting intimate.”

“Really?” The businessman seems curious. 

“Yes.” Sungchan sighs. “I’ve caught them sleeping together.”

“I’m sure you knew this would happen one day.” Junmyeon sips his coffee. 

“Yes, I did. It was a matter of time. I’m not--It’s dinner time. I think we should check on the crew.” Sungchan takes the book with him, impatient. “We have to make sure that everyone is ready to embark later. Chanyoung, go check on Sohee and Seunghan. Don’t forget to pass by Wonbin’s room. I think he slept in the Inn.”

“Okay.” Chanyoung stands up and finishes his tea before leaving. 

“You haven’t even touched your tea,” Junmyeon points out. 

“Water the plants with it,” Sungchan says. “We spent enough time on land. We have to finish what we started.”

It’s not that Sungchan is completely changing subjects - he truly wants to make sure the whole crew is fed and rested enough to sail later. He’s almost sure they don’t have the patience to take more alternative paths, and they’ll shortcut the way to University City. He doesn’t want to talk about the Shotaro situation since it makes him uneasy. Sungchan truly wonders what would have happened had the fire been manageable enough or simply had not happened at all. The crew had certain expectations for the two of them, and it felt like they would grow to be more than bedmates. Sungchan was simply too shy when it came to Shotaro; he could easily charm a random stranger into his bed, but when it came to his best mate, he would stutter and blush at the simplest suggestion. Every time he tried something, it wouldn’t land. Maybe Shotaro knew and pretended not to out of pity. Maybe.

“Are you going to take this book with you?”

“I’ll return when we come back, don’t worry.”

“You know I won’t mind.”

“You gave us enough, hyung.”

He walks into the cafeteria, and the musician is already playing a song. Chanyoung will miss the live music when he leaves Port City. Back home, they had a piano in their house and many other instruments; most people in his family knew how to play at least one. When the Opera was in town, his mother would take him to watch with her. Even when they were with their old crew, singing and dancing were a part of their daily routine. Their current ship is so quiet. 

He sits at the biggest table, makes sure there’s a seat for every member and accepts and takes the food the servers offer, especially bread. He’s saving for his friends as he should. 

Wonbin is the first to appear. He’s yawning and stretching, fully covered by a fancy silk shirt. 

“Good morning, hyung.” He sits at the table. “Why are there seven chairs?”

Sungchan counts again. 

“Because… we’re in seven?” He leans his head, confused. “Is someone else joining us?”

Wonbin’s face twists for a second. 

“Oh. So you don’t know?”

“Know…? Know about what? I was at the library since I woke up.”

The younger man sighs, pulling a small plate closer. 

“Shotaro hyung woke up alone today. He was waiting for Eunseok-hyung to come back, but the lady at the front said she saw a man leaving with extra shoes in his hand. Kitchen shoes.” Wonbin doesn’t serve himself, just talks. “Hyung came to my room with a piece of paper, well, not paper-paper, like, a part of a book, and there was a message. Goodbye and sorry. It was under the pillow.”

Sungchan gulped. 

“How long ago?”

“A few hours… sun was still strong outside.”

“Where’s Shotaro?” 

“He went outside, but maybe he’s back?”

Sungchan stares at the table in silence. Wonbin gets himself a cup and waits until someone passes by with juice. When Chanyoung comes to the table, he brings Sohee and Seunghan with him. 

“Where’s Shotaro?” Sungchan asks again. 

“In his room,” Sohee says. “It seems Eunseok hyung has left.”

“I just told him,” Wonbin explains. 

“He could have said goodbye to us,” Sohee complains. “We knew he was going to leave, but now we don’t even know where he went. Captain tried to find him, but nobody had seen him outside. He disappeared.”

“Maybe he doesn’t like goodbyes,” Seunghan says. “It’s hard.”

“I know, but.” Sohee shrugs, clearly disappointed. “Just saying.”

The table goes quiet after that. Sungchan stands up.

“If they serve a meal, save me some,” he warns then. “I’ll talk to Shotaro. I’ll be back soon.”

He doesn’t know how to feel. It hurts to see a crew member leaving, but Sungchan can almost sense the dread coming from the room as he climbs the stairs like he’s chasing an enemy. 

He stops by the door, knocks and waits. 

“It’s open,” Shotaro says. 

Sungchan opens the door and walks into the room, unsure and carefully. Shotaro is sitting by the bed, fully dressed and empty-handed. 

“Let’s eat,” Sungchan says. It’s not what he wants to say or ask, but he loses courage when he sees Shotaro. 

“I’m not really hungry,” Shotaro answers. 

“Right now,” Sungchan argues. “We have a long trip ahead.”

The captain nods, defeated. His sly smile seems decorative and weak, and he leaves the bed like he’s weighing a ton. 

“If you want,” Sungchan tries, doing his best to sound fair, “we could delay our departure and wait in case he comes back.”

Shotaro snorts.

“He’s not coming back. He told us he wanted to start a new life away from Capital city. We knew he would leave.”

Sungchan is the one defeated now. 

“I know.”

Shotaro moves to leave, but Sungchan is still blocking the door. The room is getting darker as the sun is hiding on the horizon. It’s cold. 

“I won’t talk about him anymore if you don’t want me to,” the quartermaster says low. “But if you want to talk now, it’s between us.”

Shotaro looks at him. His eyes are puffy, which makes him look cuter, but it’s a bad sign. 

“It’s sad to lose a mate,” he confesses. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it.”

Sungchan waits. He knows time is needed. 

“I wish he had said goodbye.” Shotaro gulps. “But I think I’d cry.”

He laughs, and Sungchan holds his shoulder to show support. Shotaro accepts it easily. 

“Did he know you didn’t have lovers before?”

“I wasn’t untouched!” Shotaro protests. 

“Doing things at the back of a pub is not the same as having someone in your bed.” Sungchan sighs. “That’s what I meant.”

“We didn’t share much… it was better not to. I knew he was leaving us, Sungchan. Don’t worry about me, I have survived worse things, you know that.”

“A broken heart is a different kind of pain, a different kind of loss,” Sungchan says. 

“How’d you know that?” Shotaro asks, staring curiously. 

“Because it’s true.” Sungchan averts his gaze. 

“My heart isn’t broken,” Shotaro says softly. “It hurts, but it’s not broken. It works just fine.”

“If you say so.”

Sungchan moves out of the way and allows Shotaro to step outside. Shotaro walks up the stairs and then looks back. 

“Why are you still there?” He asks, smiling. 

Sungchan blinks several times and then realizes he’s frozen in place. He reacts and rushes to Shotaro, holding his hand immediately. 

.

.

.