Archive of Our Own ^beta

Hera and Kanan were out on a mission. Zeb snorted to himself with amusement, sure, a mission, that's what they're calling it. He and Sabine just smiled and nodded along with it and shared an eye roll with each other. Young and dumb Ezra was oblivious to their supposed secret relationship that they tried to hide, and rather poorly at that. Zeb had figured it out right away, didn't even take that long for Sabine to notice after she joined. They guessed Ezra just assumed they were very close long time friends and partners. He was still a kid after all, with no love life to speak of, so he was totally green to those kind of things. As was made painfully aware to poor Sabine with every pathetic attempt he made at trying to be romantic with her.

Zeb shook his head and chuckled to himself as he lay back and relaxed on his bunk. He had been listening to music and reading gossipy magazine articles on the holo net to pass time. They had no missions lined up while their leaders were away. He had become so involved with them he didn't even realize it had gone into the early morning hours of the night cycle. He finally decided to call it a night. Or rather, morning? They could sleep in tomorrow anyway. He stretched and went to lay back and turn out the light when he heard rustling from the bunk above him. He grumbled with annoyance.

Whenever Ezra would toss and turn it would creak loudly. But this was relentless, he wasn't stopping. Why was he fidgeting so much? Was he having a nightmare or something? Zeb sat up and his ears perked. Now he could hear Ezra whimpering and whining pathetically, it sounded like he was hurting, like he was scared. Was it a Force nightmare? Was that a thing? Was that how the Force worked? Zeb groaned loudly and finally pulled himself up, standing to glare at his roommates trembling back, knowing he needed to snap him out of it if either of them were going to get any quality sleep.

"Ey!" Zeb shook Ezra's shoulder roughly. "What's wrong with you brat? Wake up, you're having a bad dream." Ezra cringed and balled up, he choked back a sob but it began to quietly pour out. Zeb grimaced a little with guilt. "Hey, uhh." He spoke softer this time and loosened his grip, rubbing his arm to apologize for startling him. "Sorry I scared you punk, you have a nightmare or something?"

"Zeb?" Or at least that's what Ezra tried to say when he opened his mouth, but all that came out was a dry chirp that sounded like a baby lothrat.

"Ehh?" Zeb screwed up his face. "You need some water or something kid?"

Ezra sat up slowly and turned to him, his expression slightly alarmed and his face pale. He blinked away the nightmare and grabbed his neck gingerly, wincing as he rubbed a sore spot at the bottom. He hissed with pain as he touched it with his fingers. That's not normal is it? That wasn't there yesterday. Why did it hurt so bad and why....

"Zeb?" Ezra glanced up at him with big worried eyes, his voice cracking like a squeaky air vent. "Why can't I talk?"

"I dunno. Did you talk too much yesterday? Try to serenade Sabine again? I remember she jabbed you in the windpipe after that last time." Ezra had butchered careless whisper at the top of his lungs, needles to say he was whispering from his carelessness after that.

"No." Ezra tried to chuckle but yelped and cringed. "I didn't do anything. Didn't get hurt."

"Hmm." Zeb rubbed his chin thoughtfully. He titled Ezra's face up so he could see his neck, so sign of redness from a wound. Just a strange lump. That's not normal right? "Uhh, I dunno how does human biology work? You growing your Adams apple or something?"

"Wait whose Adam? I don't remember an Adam." Ezra blinked as he racked his brain. "Was he back in Tarkin town at yesterday's drop? I don't remember eating an apple from somebody.... Wait, you think this is like what happened when I ate those grapes?"

"Kid, kid, kid, never mind." Zeb held up his hands and sighed, he was just giving the boy anxiety and he was already anxious enough as it is. "Couldn't be an allergic reaction, that happens pretty fast, and you can breathe just fine. We all ate the same food for dinner so it can't be some sort of toxin. You feel sick?"

"No." Ezra coughed tentatively. "It just hurts." He rubbed some clammy sweat off his forehead. "I'm not hot, I just feel gross and exhausted."

"Probably from the dream. What was it about anyway?" Ezra grimaced and groaned at Zeb's words, looking away. Zeb frowned, he was really not asking the right questions was he. "I mean, you don't gotta talk about it if you don't wanna, I mean, with your voice hurting you, you probably shouldn't be talking anyway."

"I'm sorry." Ezra whispered.

"Aww geez." Zeb sighed to himself. He was a warrior not a baby sitter or care taker. "Let me get you some water." Zeb gladly gave himself an excuse to give Ezra some time alone and get away from the awkward situation. He went to the kitchen to grab some water but gasped and snapped his fingers. "Oh! Tea! That's what you give somebody with a hurting throat right?" He fumbled around the cabinets, grumbling with annoyance at the haphazard organization system, or rather lack thereof. Finally finding the canister with the different teas in it, he opened it and found more options than he expected. "Oh boy...." He perused the flavors, picking up one and sniffing it and recoiling. "Ugh, this is why I'm a caf drinker." He finally picked a few and put them in a mug with hot water, he joked to himself as he worked. "Dunno why I'm trying to help him get his voice back, would much rather appreciate the quiet." He chuckled and took the cup of tea back to his roomie, he found him hunched over on his bunk coughing and trying in vain to clear the irritation from his voice so he could speak normally again, groaning with frustration when it didn't go away. "Ok enough of that barking you little mutt, try some of this."

"Tea?" Ezra perked up when he took the steaming mug with tea leaves. "Good idea, thanks Zeb." He took a drink and instantly lurched forward, spitting out his tongue and gagging desperately. "Ahh! Hot! Hot! Gah, what flavor is this?" He choked back dry heaves from the painful burning of the temperature and taste.

"Ehh sorry, too hot huh? Honestly not sure what I grabbed, just tossed some random flavors in." Zeb shrugged apologetically as Ezra writhed and sobbed quietly. "Here let me get some cold water to try and put that fire out." Zeb retreated awkwardly and returned this time with a cup of water. "Here ya go." Ezra shot him a questioning glare and took it, eyeing it first before taking a test sip. When he realized it was safe he practically inhaled the whole cup. "Sorry about that kid."

"Ugh." Ezra wheezed as he gripped his throbbing neck. "Look Zeb, maybe you should just leave me alone." He coughed pathetically, his voice practically gone after the hot toxic tea.

"I really was trying you know?"

"Trying to make me worse?"

"Hey." Zeb growled at Ezra's tone. "Don't give me that attitude. I just wanted to sleep, and you were being all loud and annoying."

"Not like I asked for this. Why do you care anyway?"

"I don't! All I care about is shutting you up so I can sleep!"

"Aha!" Ezra pointed accusingly. "So you admit you tried to poison me!" He broke into a coughing fit and started gasping for air, whining and tearing up from the pain.

"Ok, ok, in all seriousness, you really need to stop talking kid. And uhh, not just cause my ears are tired of hearing ya."

"Ugh, this sucks." Ezra sniffled back some tears.

"What you thinks wrong with you anyway?"

"I dunno." He sighed and leaned back on his bunk. "Why do you care anyway?"

"I dunno, guess I feel bad. Don't think either of us will be sleeping tonight."

"Zeb, I'm not a toddler, you don't need to worry about me. Honestly that was part of why I appreciated you the most when I got sick."

"What are you talking about?" Zeb scrunched up his face. "I didn't do anything."

"Exactly!" Ezra shot up but whimpered at his pathetic attempt at shouting. "You treated me like normal, like nothing was wrong with me. You didn't care, you left me alone, you weren't constantly examining me like a test subject and shoving medicine down my throat. You picked on me and acted like everything was fine." He let out a heavy sigh, feeling exasperated. "It was so relieving. I really hated all the attention, I already felt weak and vulnerable without Kanan and Hera practically putting me under a microscope and making me feel like a liability on everyone."

"I'm sorry kid, had no idea you felt that way."

"I know, and I'm glad, at least here in my room it was refreshing to feel a little bit of peace."

"Hey. You think you have any of those meds left? I know you hated them but maybe they might help?"

"Nah. That was a relapse of strep remember? They used the back up dose on me."

"Eh bummer." Zeb rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Well, maybe we can find something else in the med bay to fix your voice?"

Ezra let out an exhausted sigh, "Zeb, you really don't have to start caring now."

"Heh, jokes on you." He smirked with his hand on his hips. "Maybe I secretly started caring a long time ago." Ezra's eyes went wide and he sat up. Zeb smiled smugly at him. Ezra smiled awkwardly and looked away. "Come on kid, let's go find your lost voice." Zeb held out his hand.

"Ok." Ezra chuckled quietly. He took Zeb's hand and he helped him sit up, his head felt heavy and a little dizzy. Suddenly Ezra realized how weak and tired his body felt after that stupid bad dream. He went to climb down his bunk and got disoriented and fumbled on the top wrung and slipped. "Whoa!"

"Gotcha!" Thankfully he fell right into Zeb's arms. "Body still half asleep there huh?"

"Maybe I just wanted you to carry me." Ezra smirked.

"Yeah well, don't tempt me to drop you." Zeb carried Ezra towards the med bay, Ezra tried very hard not to relax against his shoulders. Thankfully they arrived quickly so he didn't make that awkward mistake. Zeb sat him down on the cot, "Ok let's see what we've got left in our supplies." He began to dig in the cabinets and drawers. "Geeze kid, I think you cleaned us out. Can you try a little harder to not get injured so much? I'm surprised Kanan hasn't taught you that yet in your Jedi training. Hera's gonna go broke on you."

"Wow." Ezra folded his arms and frowned flatly. "Thanks for making me feel worse, that was a nice little guilt trip you sent me on, first vacation I've ever had."

"Yeah well I hope you took some holos." Zeb placed what little he found on the counter. "There's some lozenges left over and a bottle of nose spray, a few allergy pills, but not much else. Some pain killers but they're kinda big. Think you can manage?"

Ezra scrunched up his face, "Nah, seems like it would cause more pain. I can barely even swallow my own spit, how do you expect me to swallow that?" He began to rub his neck, thinking that might help relieve some of the discomfort.

"Mmph." Zeb grumbled to himself, rubbing the back of his head in thought. He really did feel bad and wanna help the kid, but all he'd don't so far was make him feel worse. "Maybe we can try some steam treatment to loosen up your larynx?"

"Huh?"

"Yeah! It's a good trick, like a little sauna for your face. Don't worry, this hot water you don't have to drink." Zeb turned to go and left the confused Ezra in the med bay.

Ezra sighed and stood up slowly, holding the wall for support. Why did his head hurt so bad? He felt woozy, his ears felt full like his head was clogged with cotton. Were they plugged or something? He rubbed the bridge of his nose, his face was hurting, the back of his eyes burned. Was it from that stupid tea? Were his allergies acting up? Perfect timing of that was the case. It felt like he was being repeatedly punched in the face over and over again and again. He groaned to himself and looked around the supplies, rolling his eyes to himself, may as well take some allergy pills to be safe. Like Zeb said, he was the one using up all the med supplies anyway. He let out a sigh at the other bottle, he really would like to take the pain killers, they were just way too big to swallow. He sniffled and groaned, rubbing his head, the nightmare still fresh in his mind. He was so tired but he really did not wanna go back to sleep to that, even if eventually he would have to. Maybe Zeb was right, maybe he should talk to somebody about it. But who? Not Sabine, definitely not Chopper. Ezra bit his lip, he may as well give Zeb the benefit of the doubt. He was trying after all. Maybe he really did care, maybe he really did wanna help?

"What's this?" Ezra picked up a small jar on the counter, turning it over curiously in his hands just as Zeb finally walked back into the room with a large bowl of water and a towel.

"Ok here we go. Hey, what did you find?"

"Not sure."

Zeb put the bowl down and took the jar, "Oh that stuff. You don't remember? When you took that swim in the gas with those purrgil, you ended up with your lungs all messed up. Hera had this stuff she brought from Ryloth, guess it was an old natural remedy, helped open up your airways and breathe better. Maybe it will help?"

"Maybe. Couldn't hurt to try." Ezra shrugged.

"Ok here, sit, sit." Zeb placed the bowl in front of Ezra as he sat down. "You gotta put your head over the bowl and put the towel behind your head to breathe in the steam, get some moisture into your throat. If you put this gunk on your neck and your chest it should add some extra help." Zeb opened the jar and grabbed some of the ointment on his fingers, rubbing it on Ezra's neck.

"Ugh!" Ezra flinched and groaned, making an uncomfortable face. "It feels so weird!" He cringed as Zeb rubbed it on him.

"Yeah? Well how weird you think it feels for me when I've got fur?" Zeb snorted and it cause Ezra to chuckle. "Ok now sit over the steam and I'm gonna go and get this goop off my fingers."

"Kay." Ezra sat over the bowl and began to breathe the steam. It actually did feel really nice, it helped his head feel a little better too and filled his lungs. He cleared his throat to test it but still sounded like he was gargling rocks. He groaned but kept focusing on breathing deeply, closing his eyes, trying not to think about his nightmare again. Maybe the steam would help him talk a little easier so he could talk to Zeb about it after all?

"Hey I'm back, and I had another idea."

"Hmm?" Ezra looked up and saw Zeb holding a spoon.

"I know those pain killers looked a little big, but you really should have one. I know you can't swallow it, so I crushed it up."

"Uhhh, won't that make it taste all disgusting?"

"Nuh uh. I mixed it in this spoon with sugar so you can't taste it."

"What?" Ezra started laughing, he was surprised, it was actually a really good idea.

"It's an old saying for kits back on Lasan. A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down."

"Wow, I'll actually try that. Where were you last time I was sick? Could've used that trick for all that nasty medicine."

"Well now you know for next time huh. Ok open up then, down the hatch." Zeb held over the spoon. Ezra chuckled and opened his mouth to let Zeb shove the medicine down.

"Hmm, not bad." Ezra swallowed thoughtfully.

"Ehh, your throat really didn't look so great."

"Huh?"

"I mean what I saw anyway. You might have messed yourself up with something."

Ezra bit his lip, "I mean, my head does feel kinda weird, all stuffy and achey, and my neck is really stiff. But I don't have a fever, maybe just some allergies?"

"Wouldn't wake up mostly mute from allergies." Zeb frowned. "Sorry kid, think I gotta check your throat."

"Oh come on, don't make me regret your help. I liked you better hands off and picking on me."

"Who says I can't do both?" Zeb shrugged. "Here tilt your head and look up." Ezra looked up at the ceiling and let Zeb rub and feel on his neck. He hummed to himself and then grabbed a small light. "Alright let's just get this over with."

Ezra leaned back with a face full of discomfort, "You even know what you're looking for?"

"You even know what a sore throat looks like?"

"I dunno." Ezra shrugged, unamused. "Probably all red and lumpy and angry and gross."

"Well see there ya go, sounds just like you, so that's probably about right. Now open!"

"Ugh!" Ezra moaned but finally relented, knowing Zeb wouldn't let it go. Zeb leaned in to look but didn't say anything. After a few uncomfortable moments Ezra finally close his mouth and frowned with annoyance, "Well? What did it look like?"

Zeb frowned back and sniffed with his own level of annoyance, "Red and lumpy and angry and gross."

"Told you." Ezra shrugged confidently. "At least you didn't study me intently like Sabine does. She would get a little too into giving me a check up, made me feel like she was gonna pull my face off and put my innards on display like some sort of abstract art to glorify my suffering." He shuddered slightly at the uncomfortable thought.

Zeb let out a heavy sigh and sat down next to Ezra, they sat in silence for a few moments before he finally spoke back up, "Neither of us really know what we're doing, do we?"

"Nope."

"Well, at least we're on the same page...... Feel any better?"

Ezra shrugged slightly and made a moan that sounded like an "I dunno."

"Sorry I'm not that good at taking care of you."

"Zeb, I don't need you to take care of me. I'm not a helpless little kid."

"Heh, you sure about that?" He snorted with a smirk.

"Very funny." Ezra rolled his eyes. "Well you're not my parent, so I'm not your responsibility or concern. You don't need to worry about me."

Zeb went to speak but paused for a moment, finally finding his own voice to quietly respond, "But I do."

"What?" Ezra looked over quietly.

"I mean...." Zeb rubbed the back of his neck, not feeling confident enough to look back at him. "Well, we're kinda like a family right? Or rather, a bit of a broken misfit family, but, still a family. And well, I guess that makes us like, brothers."

"Huh." Ezra blinked, he wasn't sure what to say or how to respond. "I.... Never had any siblings."

"Me neither..... But..... I guess we do now." Zeb looked down at Ezra and Ezra looked up at him. "I've got one hell of an annoying little brother." Ezra smiled up at him and started laughing, he suddenly gasped for air and started coughing. "Ok, ok enough of that, laughter obviously isn't the best medicine here. Let me get you some more water." He stood up but paused before leaving the room. "Need anything else?"

"Mmm." Ezra thought, he didn't wanna admit he was feeling worse, but Zeb had opened up to him so maybe it was safe for him to open up back. "Maybe an ice pack? I've got a really bad headache."

"Sure thing kid." Zeb walked off to get the water and ice pack, he also came back with a small blanket. "Here, brought this too, didn't want you to get too cold."

"Thanks." Ezra blinked in surprise, he hadn't even thought of that. He wrapped himself in the blanket and drank the cool water and held the ice pack against his head. He let out a sigh of relief and leaned back.

"Don't worry kid, we'll figure this out together, somehow." Zeb sat down next to him. It was quiet for a few minutes before he spoke back up. "Soooo, what now?"

Ezra's voice was quiet in response, "Umm. You uhh, asked about my dream, uhhh, earlier, I mean."

"Only if you feel comfortable talking about it, and I mean both physically and emotionally."

"No it's ok." Ezra cleared his throat. "It was, about the inquisitor."

"That guy again?" Zeb growled. He knew enough about the torments he had given Ezra and Kanan, or at least what they had willingly talked to them all about. "What happened?" Ezra let out a heavy breath and delved back into the darkness of the dream.

"Kanan and I were out training. It was a nice day. Kanan was pushing me really hard, I was giving it my all until finally I had no more and I collapsed. I asked him, I did good right? Kanan praised my efforts, saying my hard work was turning into great progress. I could hardly even respond to him, I was too busy gasping for air with exhaustion, I couldn't even use my voice. Kanan chucked that I must've given myself Force fatigue. Just then a huge shadow covered us, it covered everything. I felt cold, unnaturally cold, I could not stop my body from shaking. It was the grand inquisitor. We were somehow transported into his ship, more specifically into his torture chamber. He had Kanan locked onto a metal platform for punishment and I was beaten in a heap in the corner. He had captured us with the intent to torture information from out of us. When it became apparent we knew nothing, he trapped us to torment for fun."

When Ezra's voice cracked, Zeb turned to see his eyes turning glassy, "You don't have to continue if you don't wanna." Ezra shook his head, swallowing thickly before continuing.

"He.... He was doing horrible things to Kanan. I begged him to stop but he was forcing me to watch, he held my face to gaze helplessly on the bloody battery body of my master. I told him I would tell him anything, but he didn't care about that anymore. All he cared about was causing pain. I could feel the pain he was inflicting on Kanan, his screams were roaring in my ears and burning into every muscle and bone in my body. I kept yelling at the top of my lungs but he didn't listen and didn't stop. Finally was was tired of me, he told the probe droid to get me, to grab the little one. He threatened to cut my tongue out if I didn't shut up. But I didn't care. I got angry, I felt cold, I felt the hatred take over, I could feel the dark side consuming me. It was like I was on fire, like I was being eaten alive, the teeth of the dark side crushing me and swallowing me whole down into the darkness of my mind. I couldn't feel my body anymore, I went numb, like I lost control. It was like I was watching a different Ezra from a different universe, an alternative timeline of myself, in another life where I had actually gone down the path of the dark side, and I was powerless to stop myself. I could feel the power instability inside of my head and my body, the confliction and battle between the light and the dark. Only the dark was winning and I was losing. I was becoming a monster. I couldn't believe it, I didn't wanna believe it. I knew it wasn't real and yet it felt so real I thought it was true, that it was actually happening. I was attacking him savagely but he easily blocked every attempt. He deflected one of my shots back onto me and it hit me in the chest. I could hardly breathe, I could see the blood, I knew I was bleeding out, I was going to be useless to help save Kanan now. The inquisitor taunted me that if perhaps I perished he could revive my body with the art of necromancy, he would use me as practice and use the dark side to possess me and I would become his puppet apprentice and he would use my body and power to kill Kanan and then use me as a living weapon to come after all of you."

"That's beyond twisted!" Zeb flinched at such a disturbing thought. "Can they do that with the Force? What a terrifying thought."

"I threatened him until he finally grew sick of me, he used the Force to lift me up and bound and gagged me, then he pinned me down on the floor, he reached out and took Kanan's light saber and held it up to my neck. He was playing with me, asking if I had a death wish, joking he was going to perform emergency surgery to remove the tumor that I was in his plans, he was going to kill me with my masters own blade and make him watch. I could feel the heat scalding into my neck, right before he killed me he called me Icarus because he said I had flown to close to the sun, and now I was going to burn for it. When you woke me up was when he was about to cut my head off. I'm sorry I freaked you out and got upset." His voice cracked with emotion until he finally couldn't speak anymore, more from the emotional pain than from the physical pain.

"I, uhh....." Zeb honestly didn't know how to respond. Ezra was shaking, sucking in quick deep breaths, desperately trying to hold back his tears. What could he say to something like that, to help him feel better? Finally he spoke up. "It's ok. I shouldn't have been so rough and woke you up like that."

"Maybe it's good you did. I didn't have to see him hurt Kanan anymore. I didn't care if he killed me, but....." Ezra's voice squeaked and he choked back a sob as the tears poured from his bloodshot eyes. "I didn't want to lose him. I, I don't wanna lose anyone else." He sniffled and rubbed his face. "I lost my first family, I don't wanna lose this one too." He buried his face into the blanket and began sobbing.

"Aww geez kid." Zeb grimaced. He felt a little awkward. How do you console a crying child? Should he? Would Ezra want that? No. It wasn't about what he wanted, it was about what he needed. Zeb put his hand on Ezra's trembling back, he felt him flinch and tense at the touch. But Zeb didn't take his hand away, he began to rub it up and down his back. After a few moments he felt Ezra relax and sniffle back the last of his tears and look up. Zeb gave him a reassuring smile, "You'll be ok. Don't worry, your family will make sure that never happens. You can count on your big brother, you hear me?"

Ezra snorted back some laughter and rubbed his nose, nodding back up at Zeb, "Sure, yeah, sounds good."

"There, that's better then." Zeb ruffled his hair. "Feel any better after talking about it?"

"I dunno. I guess so?" He cleared his throat and his voice strained. "My voice doesn't feel any better."

"Well, one step at a time then huh."

"My face really hurts after that."

"Yeah, crying while not feeling well isn't a good combo." Zeb rubbed his chin in thought. "Hang on, I got one more idea."

"What's that?" Ezra froze when Zeb began pressing his fingers on his face. "Uhhhh, what are you doing?"

"Something I remember seeing the healers do. Pressure points. Might help release some of the tension in your head."

"Huh. Sounds weird but ok." Ezra closed his eyes and let Zeb push and rub on the different tender parts of his face, trying to relieve some of the pressure. After several minutes Ezra started to wince and his breath hitched. "Starting to hurt."

"Ok we can stop."

Ezra rubbed his face, "Thanks for trying."

"Every little bit helps I suppose."

They sat in silence before Ezra spoke back up, "What do we do now?"

"Well, I dunno about you, but I don't think I'll be able to fall asleep tonight."

Ezra smirked, "Yeah me neither."

"Sorry I couldn't help you find your voice."

"You kinda did." Ezra said quietly, more for himself than anything else.

"Huh?"

"Ahem, nothing. Just uhh, maybe don't tell Hera and Kanan that I'm messed up again. We should let them enjoy their time away together, they need it."

"More than you know kid." Zeb chuckled to himself.

"You know, I didn't wanna admit it out loud but, speaking of family, I kinda feel like, well, they feel like my parents. I like seeing them together and I feel bad they don't have much time alone together."

"What do you mean...." Zeb sat up and narrowed his eyes.

"I mean, I dunno if you ever noticed, but they're a really good pair. I want them to get together already, that way it really would make them feel like a mom and a dad."

"Wait, wait, wait..... You're telling me you knew they were a couple?"

"Well yeah." Ezra scoffed and gave him a dumbfounded face. "Isn't it obvious? I dunno why they try to hide it."

"Oh karabast, he knew all along." Zeb rubbed his head and grumbled to himself.

"Huh?"

"Hey kid listen..... When you're better, and the next time those two go away, you should go tell Sabine, see if she knows about it too."

Ezra blinked in surprise, "You think she doesn't know?"

"Yeah she doesn't know something alright." Zeb smirked to himself, formulating a little plot to bet with Sabine, he would bet that Ezra really knew about Hera and Kanan all along, only she wouldn't know he already knew the truth. It was easy credits! He chuckled eagerly at the thought.

Ezra shrugged, "Ok, I'll be sure to ask Sabine."

"Ask me what?"

"Sabine!?" Zeb and Ezra both turned in surprise to see her standing in the doorway.

"What are you guys doing in here so early in the morning?" She looked Ezra up and down. "You get in a fight and beat him up or something?"

"Uhhhh, something like that?" Zeb tried to wear a convincing smirk.

"Yeah I don't buy it." She walked in with her hands on her hips, eyeing Ezra sternly, he ducked back nervously and tried not to look at her. She grabbed his chin and turned his face to hers. He whimpered quietly as he felt her analyzing him. "You get sick again?"

"No!" Ezra squeaked pitifully and cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Mmmmhmmm." She raised an eyebrow, hardly convinced, and then turned her accusatory glare towards Zeb, who flinched in surprise. "And what about you?"

"Hey I was just trying to help him find his voice. He woke up unable to talk."

"Uh huh. Sounds like sick to me."

"I'm not sick!" Ezra sat up angrily.

"Ok then. Tell me this.... Why do you have an ice pack on your head?"

"Uhh.... I have a headache."

"Hmm. And why is your face red and your eyes bloodshot?"

Ezra hesitated, not wanting to admit he was crying and had a bad dream, "I ummm, my face hurts and I couldn't sleep."

"Huh. Sure it's not a fever?" She put her hands on his face and pulled at his eyes. Ezra was about to protest but then he realized Sabine was touching his face, and suddenly he didn't really seem to mind.

"Look he's said he's not sick." Zeb spoke up.

"Oh? And you believed him? Because he's always so staunchly honest and open about not concealing injuries." Ezra looked away sheepishly at Sabine's words.

"Yeah well uhhh, I checked his throat and it looked uhhh, soreish?"

Sabine nearly snorted, "Wow, you actually checked his throat, and he actually let you?" They both stared blankly back at her in silence and she blinked with surprise that it was actually true. "Oh. Well, uhhh, then, what did it look like?"

"Like he ignited his light saber between his teeth and shot it all the way down into his chest."

"Yeah, and that doesn't sound like the symptom of somebody whose sick to you....?"

Zeb paused thoughtfully for a few moments and then frowned, grabbing Ezra by the collar, "You lied to me!?"

"Oww, Zeb!" Ezra pulled away. "Look, no I didn't think I'm sick. I mean, I dunno, maybe I am, I don't know why I suddenly woke up unable to speak and had this painful lump. Not like this has ever happened to me before." He slumped and let out a sigh. "I just wanna get my voice back. It really hurts. I'm scared ok?"

"It's ok to be scared. But you need to be honest about it, otherwise how is anybody supposed to help you?" Zeb put a hand on his shoulder.

"I don't like asking for help. It's not an easy thing to admit you know. You feel weak and vulnerable and pathetic, like a failure."

"It doesn't make you a liability you punk, it makes you human."

"Well then why don't you ever get sick?"

"I'm not human. Lasat's are a warrior race, we're much more sturdy than you meat bags. Honestly not sure how you lot have survived this long with as poorly evolved as you are."

Sabine blinked in surprise at what she was seeing transpire between the two of them and finally interjected a response, "Uhhh, yeah, what he said."

"Ok fine, well." Ezra paused in thought. "So I don't have a fever, I know that much, I felt all clammy and gross but I think that was from my, stress dream. But maybe my dream was warning me that something was wrong with me? I had that painful lump and I couldn't speak. My head aches, my neck is stiff, I'm kinda dizzy, my ears are plugged up and won't pop open, the pressure hurts."

"Hmm. Did you fall and hit your head? Maybe you messed up your ear crystals."

Ezra flinched in shock at Sabine's answer, "I have crystals in my ears? Is that a Jedi thing? Like kyber crystals? Is that why I can hear the Force?"

"Wait, what?" Sabine shook her head. "No. Everyone has tiny little crystals in their ears. Doesn't have anything to do with the Force. But if your face is painful and your nose is stuffed up, then may be a sinus infection?"

"Wouldn't explain the sudden laryngitis." Zeb replied.

"True." Sabine nodded thoughtfully. "And that lump over your larynx is pretty strange and definitely not normal. Maybe you came in contact with some sort of strange virus on our last supply run? All the swelling in your neck could be pressing on you ears too. Not like you injured yourself or ate anything weird?"

"No, we had the same thought. We couldn't figure it out either."

"Well did you try anything Zeb?"

"Didn't find much in the med bay. Gave him a pain killer, used that goop of Hera's on his neck and had him breath some hot steam to try and lube up his voice. Tried pressure points and gave him an ice pack for the headache. Not much else we could do."

"He also tried to make me poison tea."

"What?" Sabine laughed. "Well, that aside, it sounds like you actually did all the right things Zeb, good job."

"Don't act so surprised." Zeb snorted arrogantly.

"I don't think any sort of cold or flu medication will work in this situation, can't get him antibiotics or bacta with no fever and if it's viral." She glanced at the meds on he counter and shrugged. "Guess we'll stick with allergy meds and he just needs to work it out of his system and take some vitamins?"

"Man, I'm not looking forward to what Hera and Kanan will do to me once they get back after tomorrow." Ezra rested his chin on his hands in defeat.

"Not the end of the world." Sabine shrugged casually. "Not the first time you've been sick or injured, won't be the last."

"Wow, so comforting." Ezra muttered sarcastically.

"Well, I think I'm going to make some non toxic tea if you would like some?"

"Yes please."

"And I think it's about caf o clock." Zeb stood up and stretched. "You coming kid?"

Ezra bit his lip and hung back, "I think I'm just gonna stay in here for a bit, I need a little time alone."

"Suit yourself." Zeb followed Sabine out into the main room. He smirked slyly to himself, perfect time to be alone with her so he could set up the bet that he would win later.

For the rest of the day they all took it easy and tried to relax. Zeb and Sabine did a few things like cleaning and organizing, random tasks that always got put aside for more pressing things. Ezra felt bad. He wanted to help but he felt, well, bad. The lump seemed to effect his breathing, he would get dizzy or short or breath or overheated if he tried to do anything even remotely simple, even if he took it slow. If Sabine or Zeb caught him trying to do anything they forced him back to sit on the couch. He looked glum and slightly annoyed. Sabine would bring him tea, Zeb wanted to be supportive the way he knew best, by being rough, but the poor kid looked like he would break if he so much as patted him too hard. After a few hours he brought him some medicine and jogan fruit. Ezra was actually grateful, he could tell by the genuine smile he wore despite how awful he looked. That night as Ezra slept, Sabine and Zeb were up watching holo vids when Hera and Kanan commed to check in. They hesitated to tell them that Ezra was incapacitated again, but they knew they would be back tomorrow and if they showed up and saw him like that they would be upset, plus maybe they could pick him up some supplies while they were out and on the way back.

"Hey, so uhh, there is one little thing that happened." Sabine's voice went up a few guilty octaves.

There was a sigh on the other end and she could feel the frown in Kanan's voice, "What did Ezra do this time?"

"I mean ehh, wasn't the kids fault or nothing." Zeb tried to chime in. "But he umm, lost something."

"Did he try to lose Chopper out in the wild?" Hera sounded amused and rolled her eyes.

"If he lost his light saber I swear..." Kanan started growling.

"Nah he ummm, lost his voice."

There was a confused pause on the other end before Kanan spoke up, "His voice?"

"Yeah he woke up with this sore bump on his neck and not able to speak."

"We tried to help him." Sabine added, she could tell Zeb was faltering. "He's not hurt, he didn't get into any weird or poison food, we aren't sure what happened to him."

"So he's sick." Kanan replied flatly.

"Yeah, maybe?" They both shrugged.

"How bad is it?" Hera tried not to sound concerned.

"Not that bad." Sabine sounded more confident this time. "No fever or anything like that. Headache and said his ears hurt. Maybe allergies or a sinus infection, could just be laryngitis, but that lump is pretty painful on him to swallow so he's not really eating much."

"Ok." Hera sighed. "Well, thank you for telling us. Maybe we can find some things to bring home and help him."

"And make sure he stays rested and out of trouble." Kanan's tone was stern, he didn't sound happy but they knew it was because he was hiding behind his worry for his Padawan.

"You can count on us boss." Zeb nodded and the com clicked off. He sighed and turned to Sabine, "You don't think we're in trouble do you?"

"Hey, we did nothing wrong." Sabine shrugged innocently and went back to the holo.

The next morning they all enjoyed one last time to sleep in before getting up to get things going. Ezra got up this time too, he went with Zeb to the med bay to clean things up after the had been using it so much lately. Zeb had been annoyed at the haphazard organization of things so he decided to try and put things away in more proper locations. Ezra was wiping off the counters with cleaning wipes while Zeb took one last look in the cabinets.

"Guess it's time for things to go back to normal now huh." He grabbed a last few loose items to put away in the drawers.

"Tell that to my voice." Ezra rolled his eyes, it had actually gotten much worse. He could hardly do more than whisper now, if he tried to use it too much it would go out in mid sentence.

"Yeah, I'm sorry we couldn't figure that out."

"Ehh, it's ok. At least you tried." Ezra gave him a small smile. "I wouldn't trust anyone else."

Zeb smirked back, "Yeah well, at least your normal caretakers will be back, so maybe they'll actually figure this out."

"Ugh. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad they're back, but not looking forward to all the hovering and getting poked and prodded constantly." He held his swollen neck as he dreaded the thought.

"I thought you liked having parents." Zeb teased.

Ezra tried not to blush, "I mean, yeah well..." He cleared his throat awkwardly. "Maybe not overly paranoid intense parents."

Zeb shrugged casually, "Can't blame them for worrying. I mean, look at all the messes you get caught up in. And maybe stop concealing injuries and illnesses from us? We're gonna get a hive mind at some point and develop some sort of Ezra's hurt sixth sense."

"I didn't mean to make anybody worry, that's the reason why I always hid it. Guess I got so used to being on my own for so long, I forgot what it was like to have people who wanted to try and help take care of you when you needed it."

"Yeah well, hopefully you remember that, and maybe remember that they aren't the only ones."

"Yeah.... I know. At least, thanks for not lecturing me and patronizing me." Ezra looked away uncomfortably, still not used to Zeb being so nice to him.

Zeb hummed in response and went to go put away the last few things he was holding, he smirked down at the final item before turning back to Ezra, "Hey, light saber boy."

"Huh?" Ezra looked up in confusion.

Zeb turned on the flashlight and held it up in front of him as if it were a tiny light saber, "How bout you let your big brother give you one last check up before releasing you back to your primary care specialist."

Ezra laughed at him and rolled his eyes, "Whatever you say, bro. Just don't go putting me out on display for everyone to gawk at and see."

"Oh you like the attention." Zeb chuckled in a mocking tone.

"I do not!" Ezra laughed as walked over.

"Yeah, yeah, now hurry up, stick out your tongue and say ah." Zeb shone the light around and frowned. Wasn't looking any better, in fact it had started looking a lot worse. His tonsils had swelled up all nasty looking, Zeb sure didn't envy that, he was thankful Lasat's didn't have those to deal with. But he felt bad for the kid, he really did wish he knew what to do to help him, but at this point all he could be was supportive, and maybe that was what he needed the most right now. Ezra finally piped up and made a noise of protest after a while. "Well, I'm no medic but, looks a lot redder and a lot lumpier and a lot grosser." Zeb joked sadly and Ezra scoffed in response.

"Zeb?" "Ezra?" They both glanced to the doorway to see Hera and Kanan staring at them in confusion and surprise.

"Uhh...." Zeb glanced back at Ezra for a sec and finally took a few steps back and held up his hands, wearing an awkward smile. "Heh, he's all yours guys."

They both gave Zeb a shocked stare for a moment before turning back to Ezra and rushing over to him. They both immediately began fussing over him frantically, speaking quickly over each other as they asked him questions and offered him kind words, Hera grabbed one of Ezra's arms to check his pulse and put her other hand on his forehead to brush back his hair. Kanan took Ezra's face in his hands and began to turn it different angles to inspect it and then started to painfully press and rub all over his neck. Ezra shot Zeb a desperate glance for help but ask seen did was cringe slightly and take a step back as he watched the display, chuckling awkwardly in sympathy. Hera turned Ezra's face and pushed an ear light into his ear, causing him to whimper and wear a large uncomfortable grimace. He went to open his mouth to protest but it was just in time for Kanan to shove a thermometer inside, putting a hand on his chin to force it shut so he could continue to lecture him. Ezra winced and whined but said nothing, just dealing with the tough love of his anxious helicopter parents. He finally managed a glance back over at Zeb who was watching with amusement and contentment. Zeb shook his head and shot him a smile and a shrug, amid all the aggressive fawning Ezra gave him a small smile back. He would get over this, he would be alright now, he had his family. His parents, and his brother.

Several weeks later....

It had been over a month since Hera and Kanan had last been able to get away, they had a lot of rough missions and big supply runs. They were ready for a break. Nobody was ever able to figure out what had happened with Ezra, but he had been unwell and unable to speak for over a week, his recovery had been rough and gone slow and it took him another week just to feel human again. Hera had brought the situation up with fulcrum during one of their private calls. They had discussed his condition with some of their medics and nurses and they deduced he must have come in contact with some sort of respiratory viral infection that set off his immune system, causing every lymph node in his body to overactive respond and cause the illness. As they got ready to prep the crew for their next time away, Ezra and Sabine and Zeb all stood at attention as Hera and Kanan got ready to leave in the Phantom.

"Make sure Chopper doesn't get into trouble." Hera was saying.

"Now you know we can't promise you that." Zeb rolled his eyes.

"Realistic expectations please?" Kanan smirked at Hera.

"Oh alright." She turned to Ezra. "And try not to end up incapacitated again."

"Hey, what did he just say about realistic expectations." Sabine joked.

"Ok, ok, we're going." Kanan walked off.

"Be careful, be back soon." Hera followed.

"Bye!" The trio waved as they departed.

"Well." Sabine stretched one of her arms. "I'm gonna go to my room."

"Kay." Ezra watched her go. He turned and saw Zeb watching from around the corner. "Oh!" Ezra's face lit up, suddenly remembering what he had to do. He rushed after Sabine towards her room. "Hey, uhh, Sabine? Can I ask you something?"

"No I will not pretend to be your girlfriend so we can 'play house' while they're away." She groaned.

"Wait, what...?" Ezra paused and then shook his head. "No, no, this is serious."

She notice his tone and turned to him with concern, "What is it?"

"It.... It's about Hera and Kanan." He hesitated awkwardly. "I mean, I feel bad they think they can't be themselves around us and have to go away to hide it."

"What are you talking about?" Sabine's eyes narrowed.

"Well...." He rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm not sure if you ever noticed, but, they kinda like each other. A lot. Like, a lot lot. I can feel Kanan's Force energy and how it changes when he's around her or even just talking about her. I just want them to be happy, to be comfortable together, so they know they can feel safe being honest around us. I mean, did you ever notice that they kinda act like a married couple?"

"Wait.... So you knew? All this time?" Her tone turned more tense.

"Uhhh, yeah? Didn't you?" He stepped back nervously as Sabine let out a very heavy sigh and walked past him to open one of her dresser drawers. "Wait, what are you doing?"

"I gotta go talk to Zeb and take care of something real quick." She grumbled as she grabbed a handful of credits and stomped out of her room.

Ezra watched her go for a few moments and then shrugged. He was glad Zeb made him tell her about Hera and Kanan, now that all three of them knew about it, maybe they could talk to them openly about it when they came back. That way they all could be comfortable with one another and more open and happy as a family. Ezra smiled to himself. His new family. His parents, his brother, and his future girlfriend.