Chapter Text

So, I'm dead.

I mean, if the huge black screen of death I'm floating in wasn't obvious enough, there's also the fact that I feel high. Like, do you know the feeling of taking fifteen Redbulls and entering the forbidden hour of the day? No? Just me? Well, screw you then.

Anyway, this means there is a thing called purgatory after you die. So scratch that out of the list of afterlife activities. Now the real question is, am I going to heaven or hell? If I'm being real here, I'm probably going to hell. Like, no chance I'm going to heaven whatsoever.

Why? Well, okay. Let's review.

When I was three, I nearly blinded my best friend by almost stabbing his eye with a pencil. Don't ask. I was morbidly stupid back then.

When I was five, my abusive dad died. Left me a message telling me I was his worst mistake in his entire life. Rude, but okay. Also discovered that he had been cheating on my mother, so that wasn't surprising, considering he was such a dick.

When I was eight, I almost drove a girl to suicide. I guess not liking her was enough to justify my irrational hatred. We made up eventually but it's not like we became friends or anything.

When I was thirteen, my negligent mom died. Jokes on her, you can't give a damn about someone if they aren't around in your life. At least my aunt was there for me, like always. She's great. Also around that year was when I got drunk for the first time and apparently did it with a random woman on the street. I'd rather forget about that.

That's just my life in a nutshell. I haven't gotten to the other stuff that would get you to question whether or not I was mentally stable. But I assure you, I'm not insane. I'm just the result of two horrible parents. Honestly, it says a lot about your parents when their siblings know more about how to raise a child properly than they do. Like slapping for example. I don't think people understand how a slap works.

My uncle once said that there's a difference between slapping a child physically and spanking a child spiritually. One is abuse, the other is correction. I didn't get what he said at first until one day I felt the urge to slap my friend because of something stupid he said. Then I understood. I think.

Anyway, there's a reason why I'm just weird and not a bratty psychopath. Guess it means it's effective, whatever it is. Did it leave scars? Yeah, but it wasn't as emotionally driven as my dad, who would practically beat me to death over any single thing.

But enough about me. Where the hell am I? Sure, I just established that I was probably in purgatory, but a purgatory for...wait.

Hold on, maybe I'm onto something, but...if my cringey weeb senses are right, then this must be a reincarnation plot. I mean, look! I'm floating around in a black void with nothing but empty space as far as I can see! And I'm pretty much aware of everything going on around me, so...I guess I'm not dead? Technically? What's next? A goddess appears right in front of me, tells me that I won the lottery to reincarnate to another world, and I get to choose what world I want to live in? Sign me the hell up!

Also yeah, I'm a weeb. Well, I don't watch anime all the time but I do like it - hell, I know a few. So I guess I qualify. But one of the games I do like is Project Sekai.

I don't know when I started watching and playing it a bit, but it was one of my friends who introduced it to me. I wasn't a fanatic or anything like that, but I did like it enough that I started watching the story events. And that was when I really started liking it. AGAIN, not a fanatic.

But the group I connected with the most? Nightcord. The feeling of being out of place? Too relatable.

Look, I never felt like I was ostracized or anything, but I never seemed to be able to fit in. I was different from other kids.

I didn't play and have fun with other kids because I was working myself to death so my dad wouldn't smash me to bits.

I didn't go with my parents to Disneyland or anything like that because my parents were never around.

I didn't cry because crying makes you weak.

I didn't say what was in my mind because it wasn't important; what's more important is what my parents think.

Stuff like that.

So you can imagine how much I like them. Of course, their problems are different from mine but come on - look at my life history and tell me I won't fit in there. I swear I'm not a fanatic.

My parents will never be as good as aunty and uncley - they're a godsend. Still, doesn't change the fact that I was still a piece of garbage. Haven't forgotten the many times I was a bitch to everyone. Still have to update that in my fleshy software.

Oh? There's a light. It appeared for a second.

It blinked again, and again, and- OH GOD WHY IS IT SO BRIGHT HOLY SHI-

"It's a baby girl."

"She looks just like you."

"Of course she is. She is my daughter, after all!"

Woah. White everywhere.

Okay, maybe that sounded weird but I am seeing white everywhere. My eyes finally adjusted and there is still white everywhere. I hear beeping.

Then I saw a person. And WOW, was she beautiful. That long purple hair looked so well-combed that I could probably sleep on it. Those eyes look really captivating, seriously. It's like I can stare at them forever. And that face...wait.

Hold on.

Where have I seen this person before? I remember seeing that face in some game...what was it?

"And her name?"

And then another person appeared. He had glasses. And he also looked familiar...but where?

Wait, hold the phone. Lemme look at the woman first. And the man. And the woman. I could almost recall it; it felt so close that I could practically feel it at the tip of my little fingers-

Wait, little fingers?

When did I...?

I looked down at myself. Why am I naked? Scratch that, I look small. Too small that I almost look like a...baby.

"Mayuri. Asahina Mayuri."

Asahina? What kind of name is that? Who would have that name-

Woah, a memory flashback.

---

"Hey, who's that girl with the purple hair?"

"Oh, her? She's Mafuyu Asahina! She's like, a genius, just like you!"

"Hey, I don't think I'm that great...but why do you say that?"

"Bro, she...literally excels at everything - you give her something to do, she'll probably learn ten different things before a person can even learn one!"

"Okay, you're exaggerating. That does NOT sound like me."

"Yes, it does!"

---

Asahina...Asahina...

WAIT. It can't be...am I-

"Mayuri...that sounds wonderful!"

Oh.

Now I know why the man and woman look familiar. They're Mafuyu's parents. And her story comes with...

I take back what I said before. This is the worst reincarnation lottery ever.

Chapter Text

Well, this is awkward.

What is a baby supposed to do again? Just sit there and cry all day? Get fed mommy's milk? Hell no.

First of all, I have dignity, even though I'm a baby. Though it goes without saying that I really do need to drink that stuff for me to grow into a big girl like all baby girls do. Plus? It would look mighty suspicious if I kept refusing to drink the milk. Secondly, it's goddamn MafuMom! Well, actually, she has a name - Sadako, if I remember correctly...anyway, if you told me that, not only was I going to be reincarnated as Sadako's older daughter, but I was also going to be taken care of by HER? Either I have the worst luck ever on this reincarnation lottery or it is rigged to make me suffer. Imagine that: a rigged lottery. It almost sounds like real-life casinos.

To any gods out there, have I suffered enough? First an abusive dad and negligent mom, then me regretting everything I've done, and now this?

Now here I am, sitting on my ass with diapers and shi-stuff. Yeah, stuff. And I am forced to watch Sadako feed me like the little baby I am.

"Mayuri~ Here, it tastes good!"

That bitch really isn't gonna let up, huh? She's been trying all sorts of what I call "eating strategies" to get me to eat that soup. I don't even want to remember those strategies. The very thought of even thinking about it sends those cringy shivers down my spine. It feels icky. Ugh.

So, I just didn't let her. I look away in any direction but her with the most petty-inducing face I could muster. Look, I may be a baby right now but I AM OLDER IN THE INSIDE-

"Oh, look at her, Ichi! She looks so cute trying to avoid me~"

STOP MAKING A SPECTACLE OUT OF ME!

"Ahahaha! Mayuri truly is like you, isn't she?"

THIRD DAD, YOU ARE NOT HELPING!

Ichigo, I swear you're sometimes almost as bad as Sadako in some cases. Don't forget how you suddenly lifted me and started spinning around like you just won an award for Best Dad Ever! You certainly DIDN'T, and certainly AREN'T going to now!

But I'll give you a pass since you were nicer to Mafuyu than Sadako in the game...speaking of Mafuyu, there she is, crawling on all fours.

And there goes Sadako, sprinting like the wind, smothering her love all over Mafuyu...wait, that didn't sound right. Ah, whatever - she loves her daughter a lot, that's it. Which makes me think...she wasn't like this in the game, right? At least, from what I remember. As far as I knew, the game showed her to be rather manipulative and controlling since Mafuyu was a child.

Let's think back.

It's been...quite a while now - a year and a half perhaps? Two years maybe? - of me growing up with the Asahina family. So far, nothing major has happened yet. Sadako loved both of us, Ichigo was there for us, and Mafuyu loved their affection...pretty normal, I'd say. And that's what gets me on edge.

Everything is so...normal.

Where was the MafuMom I know that subtly urged Mafuyu to do what she wanted and not Mafuyu's? Why was MafuDad here and not usually absent from home? Where was the game version of this family? Did something change?

No, maybe nothing's changed yet. Think, Mayuri! I'm still in the infant stage of this Project Sekai game's story, according to what I remember. Nothing severe has happened yet...I think. Or is it already happening? I don't know.

But look at Sadako! I can't picture her hugging Mafuyu and spoiling her with love that can kill an edgy person! And I thought my aunt was bad, just look at how she kisses her forehead - I just can't! But she is! And it makes me so confused! Like, is she doing this out of love from her heart? Or is she the same calculative, manipulative bitch I know from the game? It doesn't help the fact that I don't feel anything weird from her...like the "vibes" I get when I know something's not right. Like a security alarm, except the robber should've set that alarm a long time ago, in which case I would recite the whole "own a musket for self-defense" copypasta except I would reenact it in real life.

And yet, here she is, hugging the small girl like a precious stuffed toy from a carnival. I almost forgot that this would be the same woman who would go on to destroy Mafuyu's sense of self.

One thing I'd like to point out about what happened just now is that Sadako left me for Mafuyu so fast I was almost surprised. Sadako, are you trying to tell me something or am I being unnecessarily paranoid? But, oh boy, let me tell you: it wasn't the first time she paid more attention to Mafuyu than me. Some were subtle, such as this love-bombing right here. Granted, it might truly, staunchly, and unequivocally be me being unnecessarily paranoid. But at the same time, some were blatant: one example that comes to mind is when Mafuyu and I tripped over ourselves and I hit my head on the table leg - man that hurt a lot - within clear view of Sadako, and the first person she goes to is Mafuyu.

Okay, Mom. I get that your golden child should be protected but could you at least address first the elephant in the room that is the throbbing mound on my head?!

Or that time when she had prepared a meal for Mafuyu but "conveniently" forgot to feed me? At this point, I'm questioning her priorities. No amount of teasing is gonna convince me that you love how I act when you do things like this in front of me. I am reminded of my uncle's words: sometimes, parents just don't know their actions can impact others, especially kids.

My point? While it certainly felt annoying being second to arguably the main central character of Nightcord at 25:00, at least give me an equal amount of care and love. Seriously, this is how you raise attention-seekers at birth - they would want to do anything to get those people to look their way, morals be damned.

Ugh. This baby brain really needs a break. I can't even talk properly yet and I already feel old.

I waddled over to Sadako to give her a piece of my mind. Come on. I think you've cuddled her long enough; give me some too.

I give the woman a slap on the arm, except...wow.

Wow.

Is that how I slap? Because it looked like I just weakly brushed the fabric of her shirt. Did I miss? Was it even possible to miss at this non-existant distance?

Fortunately, that was enough for Sadako to take notice...unfortunately, she doubled down on the teasing. At least, she thinks it is.

"Aw, is little Mayuri jealous that Mafuyu is getting more love than you~?"

What.

In what world would a mother say that? Why is she acting like I am an adult who could understand what jealousy is? Is that even teasing, or is she deliberately trying to anger me?

Well, whatever it is, I didn't want to give her the satisfaction. So I made the best impression of "hmph" and waddled away. Yeah, I know it looks childish, screw you.

"Ahaha~ Look, she really is jealous!"

"I can see that dear - she really acts 'mature' for her age."

WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?! Ugh, let me crawl to my crib and sleep my sorrows away.

Then Mafuyu gave me that look. That goddamn look.

That look of superiority when they get their way and are happily watching you suffer because of it. That look when they know what they're doing. That kind of look.

Is this what sibling rivalry feels like? Because if it is...

Ah, to hell with it. If my dignity is going to be taken away like this, then might as well go all out.

I tried to sprint at her, give her the lesson of not smirking in front of your enemies....and I fell face-first. Goddamn it.

Yeah, laugh at me. Make me feel more pathetic than before. Not you, Mafuyu - stop laughing. I still have a score to settle with you. I'll get Sadako to hug me like that...eventually.

I don't know if I developed the ability to shut everything out to keep my sanity, but it definitely felt like I skipped a few scenes because I had no idea what happened the past few hours. Did I just mentally sleep? Is that even a thing?

Ah, whatever. Maybe I'll just head over to my crib and do god knows what, like pee my diapers or something. I wouldn't know since being a baby wasn't in the reincarnation resume, so forgive me if I'm doing my job wrong.

I passed by Mafuyu, who had been tucked into the crib by Sadako and left me to rot on this floor. Very good parenting, Sadako. It's not like I can climb into it myself...

Or can I?

My curiosity piqued. Has there ever been a moment where a baby managed to climb a crib and plop themselves into the comfort of their bed? Logic says this is a bad idea and I may very well get some sort of injury, and because I am approaching the age of toddlers, the idea shouldn't be taken lightly like how I just considered it.

I look at Mafuyu, who's looking at me with those cute, wide eyes of hers that sparkled with curiosity. Stop. You're gonna make my heart melt at the rate you're staring at me like that. And why are you looking at me like that? It's like you haven't seen another baby before.

We maintained eye contact for quite a while. Thinking back, I always wondered why I was born first - before Mafuyu. Were the gods of this world telling me I should be looking out for her? That's funny.

I've never been a good person. I've brought nothing but misery to other people - the pencil incident and nearly driving a girl to suicide come to mind. Sure, I may have been able to reconcile with them somewhere along the line in my previous life, but the fact still remains that I did those things. Without remorse. My aunt and uncle always told me to learn and move on, but...how do you move on? Forgiving yourself? How does forgiving yourself even work anyway?

I wonder if this whole thing was a joke from those same gods. Why make a girl who has made people suffer an elder sister of an innocent person? It makes no sense.

And here I am, staring at this baby who was going to grow into the Mafuyu I know from the game. I feel guilty; she deserves someone better than an idiot like me. But at the same time, I look at Mafuyu and I feel this instinct to protect her from anything. Whether I like it or not, she and her family have made my second early life a lot more lively, even if they sometimes have a good laugh at my expense.

But I know that it won't last. In a few years, she'll probably be going to school like me, and she'll go through the same thing in the game: people will be placing expectations after expectations after expectations on her. Then they'll disregard her dreams in favor of what they think would be perfect for her. She'll throw herself into her studies, thinking that she should do what others want her to do, until it'll be too late and she'll lose her sense of self. All of that will happen in due time. But...

But I'm here. So...maybe I can do something?

Right until now, everything has been a...normal life, according to normal people's standards. So I guess that means I can live a life. Which means I have a second chance. Maybe I can turn things around; subtle things here and there to influence things.

I look at my crib. I see the crib as a visualization of what will happen later: It's like an obstacle I need to overcome. And if I was going to make things better here - maybe not right, but at least better than it was previously - then I need to overcome it.

Mafuyu then looked at the crib. Then looked back at me and gave me that OH-SO ANNOYING SMIRK and gave a short laugh-

Oh, you're gonna laugh at me because you're in the bed and I'M NOT?! WATCH ME, YOU STUPID BABY. I'M GONNA PROVE YOU SO WRONG!!!

I started gripping the poles of the crib with my tiny arms and legs, using them to inch my way up. It was slightly sliding because of me, but I didn't care. As long as it didn't lean to one side I should be completely fine.

I was halfway through the journey up Crib Everest when I started hearing voices coming from the door. More specifically, the voice of Sadako. Crap.

She's gonna see me and presumably place me in the crib, which would mean it would be because of Sadako and not my efforts that I got into the crib! Nope, not happening!

I hurried up the pace, but that proved to be a mistake as one of my legs suddenly slipped and now I'm hanging with two of my arms. I wonder how I have this much strength as a baby. Is it because I'm reincarnated? Nah, probably not.

I could vaguely hear the noises of concern coming from Mafuyu, but I didn't care. I was so close. My pride was on the line.

I managed to grip the poles with my legs and slowly lifted myself over the top to get into the crib. The voices are getting louder. Sadako is close.

Then right as I managed to get over the obstacle and lower myself into the bed, I heard a yell. Apparently, that was enough to startle me because I immediately lost my grip and fell into the bed...or not?

Suddenly I'm back in the void. Floating. again. In the-

HOLY MOTHER OF GOODNESS WHAT IS THAT?!

In front of me is...well, I don't know what it is! It was like a dark mist that morphed into some sort of unrecognizable face that had those malicious glowing red orbs as eyes, and they were LOOKING DIRECTLY AT ME. I have never felt this scared since my late bastard dad! It was swirling around me like I was the eye of some tornado and-

"WHAT A CURIOUS BEING YOU ARE, SO WILLING, SO STUBBORN."

IT SPOKE.

W-Well, yeah, I am. What about it?

"AND SO STUPID."

Okay, no need to call me out on that one. I admit that I got a little carried away!

"AND YET, SO ENTERTAINING TO WATCH...MAYBE YOU WILL BE WORTH MY TIME."

And now it's trying to ENTER MY MOUTH HOLY CRAP WHAT IS IT DOING I FEEL LIKE I'M SUFFOCATING

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-

"MAYURI!"

I woke up.

I'm back in my room. And Sadako had the most horrified look on her face that made me think someone had just died.

Sadako then hugged me, weakly scolding me for doing such a stunt like that, and was thankful that I wasn't hurt. I could almost hear the sounds of Mafuyu sobbing in the background, but I wasn't all there. I was thinking about what happened.

WHAT THE FFFFF- FREAK WAS THAT?!

Chapter Text

School is boring.

Yeah, pretty boring. Doesn't help that I am older than what I look like right now, a child who's barely six years old. All I've been doing is reciting the same thing over and over again, it's almost made me sleep several times now.

Maybe some fun facts would wake me up.

"Okay, children, what is the answer to five plus one?"

Hey, did you know? The fear of long words is called Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia. Which is rather ironic since that 36-letter word was used to criticise writers with a tendency for long words.

"Six!"

Also, Chainsaws were first invented for childbirth. I think they were made in Scotland in the 1800s or something to help aid and speed up the process of, uh...symphysiotomy? The widening of the pubic cartilage? And the removal of disease-laden bone during childbirth. Damn, those are some words.

Ugh.

Lemme find something interesting for once.

"Mayuri? Are you listening?"

"Yes."

"What is eight plus one-"

"Nine."

That caught the teacher off guard. Yeah, didn't expect that, huh? Normally, a child wouldn't be able to answer that, but unfortunately for you, I am not a child!

The teacher sighed and went about ignoring me, as usual. Well, I acted like a child for a bit, but it gets boring real quick when you're the only genius here with a bit of sanity...if there was even a SLIGHT bit of sanity left in me, which I doubt. Children's logic is so petty, I think I might have developed one a second time just because of them. Also, you might be wondering why the teacher sighed like she had to deal with her deadbeat husband for the umpteenth time. Well, that's because I am. Um, not deadbeat. Just...different.

First time I got in trouble was when a child threw his food at me. I snuck into a kitchen, stole a solid egg, and threw it at the idiot in response. Of course, I get punished for it because retaliation is bad and you have to suck it up. Such is society.

Second time...I think it was when another was gonna write something on my desk using some sort of permanent marker or something to say mean things about me. Threatened to throw him out of a window, I think. Also got in trouble because of that.

Then I also got in trouble, AGAIN, for assaulting a teacher. In my defense, he was gonna throw a chalkboard eraser at me. Unfortunately for him, I was used to that in my previous life so I pretty much predicted when he was gonna throw it at me. Then I proceeded to march towards him like phonk music was playing in my head before kicking him in the balls. Well, actually, punching him in the balls would be more accurate. I was way too short to do that so I resorted to using the nearest organic weapon I got.

Luckily for me, he was an asshole to the staff so they let me off with just a slap on the wrist. But at the same time, everyone realized that I pretty much don't give a damn about what they think of me, so no shame-pressuring there. Also, it wouldn't make sense for them to bully and shame me because I was performing exceedingly well in my studies. So they just basically decided, "Ah, to hell with it - let's just leave her alone and let her do what she wants."

What the hell. Very nice job, you guys. Did you really just give up on a child like that? What if that child didn't know what they were doing because that's how they've been raised? What if they just needed someone to be confident in them? Or love them, I don't know - ANYTHING that involves raising a child?!

So much for teachers, am I right?

There is one good thing that comes out of this (for me): they did make a deal with me: so long as I "behave" - that is, not threaten people and commit crimes against children and all that - they will leave me alone. Which is a REALLY low bar, by the way. But other stuff? I was free to do whatever since I was getting decent grades anyway. But really? As long as my grades were fine? They're lucky I'm not some sort of snowflake loser or else I probably would do something like blow up the school lab or something. No, it's totally not something I did back in my world, shut up. 

Sadako wouldn't hear it, however. She was disappointed at my behavior despite being just as good as Miss Goodie Two Shoes. It's Mafuyu, in case you didn't know. But I do things just right so...

Anyway, as long as I don't cause any more trouble, we're fine. So there's that. Also, I kinda have a reputation now. And surprisingly, it's kinda a good way?

It started after that aforementioned child that threw an egg at me about fourscore and seven sushis ago (No, I didn't eat 87 sushis) - apparently he was being a douche to everyone; problem child and all that. I was - and I would gladly wear that crown of honor - the first person to ever stand up to him. Gee, I mean, he folded pretty quickly when I did what I had to do to him, so how can the kids be scared of him? Oh, right. Honor and Manners and all that.

Eh...

He already broke those ten commandments of honor so I don't think I need to uphold those virtues in his face when he's being a daft bellend.

Now I'm sitting here trying to stay awake. So...what to think? Well, I guess I can describe what I look like.

I look like the spitting image of Mafuyu. Obviously; what a surprise. You wouldn't be able to tell us apart except for the fact that I was slightly taller than Mafuyu, and I have shorter hair. Apparently I've gotten the tomboy setting when I was born so I'm stuck being the Veronica and Mafuyu being the Betty. I think that's how it works...

The one thing that we both have is that we're kinda popular. Of course, Mafuyu being the golden girl, but me? It's a different story. Remember the boy that I threw the egg at? Well, turns out he was as spineless as a pillow so when I took his ego down a peg, he went for someone else. Typical cowardly bully trope thing. If their target fights back, they back down. Anyway, I caught him doing that again to some poor girl, and all I did was rile her up enough to get the girl to shoo the annoying fly away. It was glorious.

The kids started calling me Big Sis for some reason. I don't know why. I just helped a girl stand up to her bully, nothing too amazing. Plus, it's partly a self-atonement of mine after being a bitch in my past life.

But hey, I got those respect points because of that so can't complain there.

The bells rang and we all got out in an orderly manner. Well, as orderly as it can be, but it's still surprising to see well-behaved children. Then again, Japan does value its good attitude a lot.

"Mayuri!"

There's my few hours-younger sister. Ugh. Don't run at me like that. It's detrimental to my mental health. It's diabetes.

"Hey."

She stops just in front of me, being the usual smiling, nice girl. "How was the class?"

I sighed. "Boring."

Mafuyu chuckled. "Well, don't worry. You'll get through it like you always do!"

"Great, more classes. It might help me look even more dead."

Mafuyu frowned. "Don't say that, I don't think it was that bad for you..."

I rolled my eyes. "I wish the teachers could make things interesting."

"You're being mean to them again. Haven't you had enough? You've already troubled them so much..."

Ah, Mafuyu. Always the kinder one.

I sniffed amusingly. "Well, they aren't bothering me, right? As long as I stay well-behaved, they let me do whatever I want."

Mafuyu sighed. "You should respect them, at least."

"Whatever. Hey, I wonder what they have for lunch this time?"

Mafuyu gave me a look. "Why is it always food with you?"

I pretended to think for a moment. "Hmm...cuz I like food."

"That's it?"

"Yes."

"...didn't Mommy tell you-"

"-that I watch what I eat, yes, I know. But I'm gonna eat what I want~"

Mafuyu narrowed her eyes, clearly annoyed. "Eating too much can make your stomach hurt."

"I know. Don't care~"

Mafuyu sighed softly in slight frustration, but as far as she knew, I was at least self-aware so she trusted that I wouldn't do anything rash. I turned around with a smirk. "Hey."

Mafuyu knew what my look meant and her expression turned a little anxious. "...what is it?"

"RACE YOU THERE!"

I took off running towards the cafeteria. Mafuyu will catch up, I'm sure of it.

"What- W-WAIT FOR ME!"

Probably.

After eating for a bit - yeah, a surprising "bit" that even Mafuyu was surprised that I managed to control myself - I decided to roam around the school when I suddenly got the feeling I was alone. Sure enough, I noticed that everyone disappeared, like the school had just closed down and I was the only person there. And the school was turning dark.

I sighed. Great, this again. I am seriously getting tired of this interaction.

That…demon is gonna start screwing around in my mind again. Whether it's gonna show up in front of me or not, I don't know. But best to be cautious and find a place soon.

I headed into the girls’ restroom where it finally showed up on the mirror as my reflection. Ugh, here we go again.

"HELLO, DEAR HOST."

"I'm not a host."

"BUT YOU ARE. I LIVE IN YOU. DORMANT, UNMOVING, BUT OBSERVING, WATCHING. YOU ARE LIVING A NORMAL, DULL LIFE."

"Yeah, and? What, do you expect me to do something out of the ordinary or something?"

"I DO. YOU ARE, AFTER ALL, AT THE POINT WHERE EVENTS WILL PROCEED THE WAY THEY ARE."

Events proceeding the way they- Is it already starting? Now? It feels too early...

"What are you talking about?"

"HURRY ALONG NOW. OR DO YOU WANT TO FAIL AT LIFE ONCE MORE?"

"Shut up. I swore to be better in this life, and I will do it."

"IF YOU DO IT."

"Whatever you say, silly voice."

The area turned bright again, and I found myself looking at my reflection again…with two other girls behind me, very much concerned and very close to pooping their panties. Like, holy crap, they are terrified.

"U-Um, big sis Mayuri?"

I'm breathing heavily. I feel heated.

Damn it. I must look pissed right now. That's probably why they're looking at me like I'm that girl from the horror movie that comes crawling out of the TV and starts playing deadly Twister. I think that was what the movie was about...eh, nevermind that. What's important to me is that I need to get back to  Mafuyu and keep an eye out for anything.

I practically marched out of the bathroom like phonk music was playing in my head, making me look a lot angrier than I'm supposed to.

Chapter Text

So after going through the whole painful four more hours of repetitive memorizing, I finally got out of knowledge prison and finally embraced the sweet release of the outside world. Something I thought I'd never say as a certified basement dweller. You know, cuz I was an abused child...

Anyway, one thing I did appreciate was how different everything was. Back in my world, most of the buildings were made of sophisticated history. It's been a while since I remember where I used to live. Actually, thinking about it, it's all a blur. It feels so far and distant, like it's right there in front of me just within my grasp, but can't materialize what exactly I'm grasping. It's an oddly frustrating thing. It's like when you're about to say something but you suddenly forget what you're about to say.

Maybe it's got something to do with me being here? I live in a different world now - well, a different country more like; I am in Japan - It's been...what, almost six years now? And even then, I still can't get used to all this. Everything appears the same, and yet there are some differences.

This Japan seems a lot more advanced in terms of culture, I suppose? And in technology too; there are a lot more holograms and virtual screens than what I remember of the Japan in my old world (I only know based on some images I saw). They use it predominantly to promote virtual idols and all that, as well as the occasional product advertisement and gacha discounts. Sometimes they use holograms outside of a store or restaurant to promote their business. I think I remember seeing a character from an anime named Lycoris Recoil or something introducing the restaurant. It was a collab event, if I remember correctly.

Well, here I am, at a theme park with Mafuyu and Sadako. Our mom wanted to take us here as a way to congratulate Mafuyu for the excellent scores she got, as well as have a sort of little recreation break. Notice that she didn't say anything about me? Yeah. I got similarly excellent scores but I guess Sadako didn't see it as something worthy of praise. All the credit must go to Mafuyu. But since Sadako was in a good mood, she let both of us have our fun.

At first, I didn't really...well, I wouldn't say I don't like it, but the crowds definitely make it a bit hard for me. It's loud, overwhelming. It assaults the deepest part of my soul I didn't even know existed.

I wouldn't say I'm scared of crowds. More like overwhelmed, like I said. It's like a hidden pressure pushing me from all sides with invisible, non-existent eyes scrutinizing my every act.

...okay, I am nervous.

"Woooooow...!"

But...if it's for Mafuyu, then I'll suck it up and push through it, like I always do. For her.

But, I gotta admit, this amusement park...

"This...this is amazing..." I couldn't help but gasp.

I'm not sure if it's the vibrant colors or the lights that lit up the sunset sky, but it gave the park a very fairytale-like aura. It was like I was stepping into a portal to a new world. It's dazzling. The blue lights, giving a mysterious vibe. The pink ones, I can almost taste how sweet they are. The yellow bars, vibrant and full of life.

I was feeling uncertain before, nervous even. And I don't admit it easily - but this weird excitement inside me threatening to burst out...

The sights, the sounds, they're everywhere and all around...

And honestly? I've never felt this good before!

"Mafuyu? Mayuri?"

Aaaaaaand there's the party popper. Or pooper.

I turned to see Sadako giving us a gentle, stern face, raising a finger to make a point. "This amusement park's very crowded, so you need to promise not to stray too far from me."

"Okay! Thank you for bringing me here, Mommy!"

"Fine..."

Sadako, much to my unfortunate chagrin, had to notice my more obvious reluctance compared to the beaming Mafuyu, who was way over Cloud 9. "Promise not to stray too far from me, okay?"

Her tone was a lot more - but still subtle - menacing, but I simply nodded, albeit slightly less reluctant this time. Fortunately, that was enough for her to let it go. I really do not want to do anything to bring down the mood, especially since this is a major event.

If memory serves me right, this is a flashback in a story event. I don't remember exactly what the name was or what happened in the event, but I do remember my friend (that is, my friend in my old world) saying that it had something to do with Mafuyu's childhood. Other than that...I think I'm doing this completely in the dark.

However, I can't shake this feeling that it feels too...early. As if the game has progressed much faster than I expected. And what that shadowy demon said...I'm not sure if he's telling the truth. Hell, he was the one who invaded my body and decided to make me his "host" and mess around whenever he wants.

But if there's one thing I am sure of, it's that whatever happens, I'll be there to witness it. And maybe, just maybe...I can influence some change.

Still...goddamn, isn't this place practically glowing!

"Girls, look! The churros from that shop are supposed to be very good. Shall we go try it out?"

Sadako gestured to a stall near us. Mafuyu was all too happy to accept. I merely follow out of curiosity (and also keep an eye out).

...

So, that's a long line. Which means we're probably going to be standing around waiting for a while. But I'm worried that it's gonna take too long - the sun is already setting. And Sadako, being the manipulative, clingy woman she is, reminded us to stay by her side. Especially me, since I'm the rebellious one and all that.

"Mayuri, what should we go on after we get our churros?" Mafuyu asked me. Heh, I'm delighted.

"There's that marry-go-round thing; we can try that out," I suggested.

"'Merry-go-round,' 'not marry-go-round.'"

"You...said the same thing."

"You said 'marry,' not 'merry.' They are two different things!" Mafuyu protested.

"No, I'm...pretty sure I said the same thing," I said with a smug grin, prompting Mafuyu to pout. Aww, so cute!

"I wish Phenny would come. He goes for walks sometimes around the park too."

And there goes the joy of teasing my sister. Ugh, that fish mascot...why do you have to remind me of that thing?

"What's so interesting about a walking fish?"

"I-I like him! He's so nice!"

"Really?"

"Yes!"

"...uh huh."

Really don't understand why she loves that fish mascot named "Phoneme," but sure, whatever makes her happy I guess. It's still stupid though. Look, I don't understand it. I don't understand the appeal of mascots at all. For all I know, they could be the second coming of Asian Pennywise.

...

...

...

"Hey, that's him, right?"

Sure enough, at the direction I'm pointing at is none other than the famed fish man himself. God...he just looks like a Finding Nemo ripoff except he's human! Why?! Why does my little sister love that thing so much?!

Leave it to Japan to anthropomorphize everything...

Mafuyu turned around, and I swear I saw her eyes sparkle like a star exploding. Somewhere in space, a supernova cried tears of gas. Sorry, but Mafuyu is even brighter than you...

"Phenny! Oh, I wanna shake hands with him...!"

"Here's your churros, you two. Is plain okay?"

Wow, that was...kinda quick. Sadako had arrived with two cups filled with churros dipped in some sort of ketchup.

"Oh, plain's okay!" Mafuyu said.

"I'm fine with it," I merely agreed.

"Also, Mommy, I just saw Phenny over there-"

A buzz erupted from the depths of Sadako's pockets- Her phone rang. Yeah, her phone rang.

"Just a minute - your father's calling me. What could this be about?" Sadako muttered that last bit as she looked away, answering the call. "Hello?"

"O-Okay..."

Mafuyu looked so dejected that I felt like slamming my hands against Sadako. But as I was about to comfort Mafuyu, I saw the fish mascot talking to the staff and about to pick up his belongings. Looks like he's about to leave. And unfortunately, Mafuyu saw it too. I could see that very moment a dilemma formed on her face. She's probably thinking about meeting up with Finding Dorkface over there, but also thinking about her promise to Sadako of not leaving her side.

"Um, Mommy...?" Mafuyu tried to call out to Sadako, but...

"I'm sorry, Mafuyu. In a minute."

At least give her ten seconds' worth of your time, geez! Isn't she your golden child or something?!

"Oh, you'll be done with work early? That means I'll need to start preparing dinner soon."

Dad's coming home early? That's good, right?

...wait, no.

That's not good at all!

Wouldn't that mean Sadako cancelling our celebration here at the park and taking both of us back home? Would Sadako even do that? Surely not...

No, this is Mafuyu's mother we're talking about here - of course that's the case, I am very sure of it. And we barely stayed here for thirty minutes!

...you know what? FFFFFF-Freak it.

We're a bunch of smart children (except I'm not a child mentally, but that doesn't matter) that did our best to please Sadako, which I hate doing, by the way. Still, I think we deserve a little bit of fun after all that hard work, right? Right?!

Besides...it's my second chance too. Acting like a child again, getting back what I lost in my previous life...I don't have a lot of fond memories of that life, so maybe I can make a few notable ones here? It could help me sleep better at night and hopefully not get randomly attacked by that demon thing inside me. Who is currently being very quiet? Weird.

Anyway, enough stalling. Time to take the first step.

"Hey...let's go meet Phenny."

Mafuyu looked at me with hopeful light in her eyes but it quickly diminished. "B-But Mommy..."

"I'm sure she knows where to find us. Plus, he's just there at the fountain, right? It's not like we'll be too far from Mom..."

Mafuyu seemed eager but I could sense she had lingering doubts. So...

I decided to grab her hand.

"H-Huh..?"

"C'mon, he's about to leave. Let's go!"

"W-Wait-"

I sprinted for the fish mascot, dragging Mafuyu with me. From the corner of my eye, I could see Sadako looking directly at us. Damn.

But wait. Surprisingly, she...didn't hurry over to us. Instead, she kept talking to Dad on her phone.

...huh? Isn't she going to get us? Didn't she tell us not to leave her side? Then why is she not doing anything?

Something didn't sit right with me, but...whatever, I'll take this as a win and live in this fun moment!

We were able to meet Finding Fish Face (and I got to shake hands with him after some pressuring from Mafuyu - no, I did not succumb to Mafuyu's charms, shut up) and had some small talk before saying goodbye to him. We tried that merry-go-round and other things like that minigame of knocking the cans off the shelf (I ended up knocking down one of the shelves instead, so there's that).

Admittedly...I was enjoying this. I've never felt this free other than the time my biological parents' relatives took me in. It felt liberating to be able to feel like I'm spreading my wings for the first time in forever.

But I guess that's enough fun for us. Time to-

"Huh?" Both of us audibly expressed our confusion.

Wait, where is she? Wasn't she just here before?

"Mommy was just right here...where'd she go?"

Wait a minute...where have I seen this before- Oh, wow. Another flashback.

---

"Ugh, that woman is obviously manipulating her, I just know it!"

"Hey, what's got you so riled up?"

"Remember the purple-haired girl I was talking about?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, I'm watching a story taking place in her childhood, and her mother just...left her in the amusement park, all alone!"

"Wow. Sounds, uh...not parent-like."

"I know, right?! And even worse, she has the gall to pretend like she didn't just leave her daughter to run around, scared for her life!"

"...sounds like bitch."

"I KNOW, RIGHT?! 'Oh, it made my heart sink, it made me so fearful-' BITCH, you never let her out of your sight, how the hell do you even lose her?! AAAAAAAAAH!"

"Geez, calm down, it's just a story."

"IT'S NOT JUST A STORY!"

---

I almost stumbled upon myself.

Wait, this is familiar! Though it felt like a coincidence remembering that all of a sudden, but still!

This is the event where MafuMom suddenly disappeared, and then all that guilt-tripping and stuff...

...I almost forgot why I hated Sadako in the first place. She felt fake, almost like an actor acting out a script. Reminds me of her.

"Mommy...?"

...nevermind, what's more important is finding Sadako. She should still be around here somewhere, probably waiting for us.

"H-Hey, Mafuyu," I began, offering her a hand. Wow, I did not sound this scared before. Was I actually terrified? No way... "We should...probably look for Mom. S-She should still be around here somewhere, right?"

Mafuyu was just as nervous as I was, maybe even more, but upon seeing me extending a helping hand, her eyes brightened. She could definitely see that I'm afraid - in fact, I can't seem to control my breathing properly. But maybe it's the comfort of knowing I'm in the same position as her and still trying to act calm despite everything telling me that I SHOULD PANIC. 

Let me glaze myself for once.

Grabbing my hand, we both began to look for our mom. Mafuyu in particular would call out for Mom every few seconds or so, which garnered some attention from other people. Well, at least it could get us more help. One lady was kind enough to approach us.

"Oh, what's wrong? Did you get separated from your mommy and daddy?" A lady with a red cap and a red-white uniform approached us.

Mafuyu flinched. Ah, right...the "don't talk to strangers" rule. Granted, this is an amusement park so it should be okay to ask for help. And besides, this lady is part of the staff. Even better.

"You seem lost...can you tell me your name?"

"A-Asahina. Mayuri Asahina. Mom...she disappeared. We can't find her."

Mafuyu looked surprised at my response. Sorry, Mafuyu, but we'll have to break one more rule from Mom.

"Okay, sweetie. Let's help you find your mom, okay? Take a deep breath..." Ah, good. This lady knows how to handle children. And I don't feel anything weird from her. It's kinda like my sixth sense, y'know, feeling if something is off about someone. Plus, she seems to feel...familiar. I don't know why.

She's trying to help me. It was then that I realized that I was out of breath. Was I hyperventilating? If so, damn. This...this whole experience is affecting me a lot more than I thought.

I took deep breaths, listening to the lady as she helped me calm down. Eventually, I felt my heartbeat slow down.

"Are you feeling alright?"

"Y-Yes."

"Okay. I'm going to ask questions so we can find your mother quickly, alright?"

"O-Okay."

"First, does she look like you?" the lady first asked.

"Yes, she has..."

...

After a bit of info-gathering from the kind lady, she took out her phone, probably to call for help. Mafuyu looked almost horrified as she tugged on my sleeve. I looked over at her, both of us sitting on a bench. "What is it, Mafuyu?"

"M-Mommy said not to talk to strangers!"

I nearly scoffed. "Mafuyu, I- She was nice..."

"But what if she was a bad person?"

"Well, she isn't, right? She's helping us find our mom!"

"B-But we promised...!"

I stood up. I was frustrated that Mafuyu was still thinking about that promise to Mom, but I understand why she's feeling this way. Still, I couldn't help but blurt out what's on my mind.

"W-Well, what would you have done? Run around until we find Mom? Probably bump into bad people along the way? Accidentally hurt ourselves?!"

Mafuyu faltered at my outburst. Ugh, goddammit.

I sighed, sitting back down next to Mafuyu. "I-I'm sorry."

"It's okay..."

A moment of silence. Ugh, this is getting awkward. I need to say something.

"L-Look, I understand. You're worried about breaking our promise to Mom, right?" I started.

Mafuyu nodded.

"But Mafuyu...we can't just keep looking. This place is so big...and even scary, too, without Mom. That's why I asked the nice lady for help. Because I think she knows this place. And what would happen if we just...kept looking for her, not knowing where we are?"

Mafuyu lowered her head. "We would get lost..."

"Exactly. And...I don't like getting lost. And neither do you."

Silence, again. Guess that conversation was enough for both of us to calm down.

"Mafuyu! Mayuri!"

We both looked to our left. There she was: Sadako, with a reasonably horrified expression you'd expect from a mom who lost her kids. Looks like that nice staff lady was of great help, after all.

And my heart jumped several skyscrapers high. Holy shhhhhhhh-eeeez, are these even my emotions? Why am I feeling like this?

And why am I running towards her and hugging her along with Mafuyu?

And why do I feel my eyes getting wet?

Why?

Mom tightly embraced both of us as if we were going to disappear. "Thank goodness...I looked all over for you! I was worried sick...are you two hurt at all?"

Woah. She addressed both of us this time.

Little Mafuyu tried her best to answer through her emotional wreckage. "I-I'm okay...

"W-We're fine," I managed to say.

Sadako gave us a big comforting smile...though, something felt...off. "Okay, that's good to hear..."

The staff lady had a big smile on her face. "Are these your daughters?"

"Yes," Sadako answered. "Thank you so much."

The lady chuckled. "Just make sure not to lose them again. This park is pretty big for youngsters like them~"

And there she goes.

Mafuyu sniffs, recovering from her emotions. "I'm sorry, Mommy..."

Sadako stroked both of our heads to comfort us. "No, that's okay. Both of you being safe is all that matters."

"Mommy..." Mafuyu's smile finally returned. God, that gives me life just by looking at it! AAAAAH, TOO CUTE!

Then she suddenly turns to me and hugs me.

Oh.

Yep.

That's great.

I'm in heaven. I can die in peace.

"It's because of Mayuri that I'm okay! She was so dependable!"

What.

"H-Huh?!" I blurted out. Wait, am I blushing? Holy crap, Mafuyu, don't put me in the spotlight like that, it's embarassing! "I-I didn't really do much...I just...stayed calm and tried to get help."

"Yeah! She looked like an adult, talking to that lady and asking for her help."

"I-I don't think it's anything to be happy about..."

Sadako patted my head. "That is something to be happy about! You were lost, and you acted like an older sibling. And you helped Mafuyu. I should thank you for being a reliable sister to Mafuyu."

Oh god, not you too, Mom...

"However, Mayuri, can I ask you one question?"

I raised two eyebrows in confusion. "Okay...what is it?"

"Why did you break our promise?"

Oh, there it is. I knew it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. I could see Mafuyu's expression turn downtrodden from the corner of my eye. Still, I played dumb to let her clarify more about what she meant. "Promise?"

"Didn't the two of you say that you wouldn't leave my side? So why did you decide to run off like that? And talking to strangers too...weren't you scared?"

Mafuyu looked close to crying again. I stayed silent.

"You two disappearing like that absolutely terrified me." Sure, a reprimand. Not too shabby. "I was afraid that you'd become 'bad girls' who give her mother grief..."

...

...

...

I'm sorry, what?!

Forget about what that's supposed to mean; why is that the first thing you say?! Why not-

"The thought of you vanishing from right out under me made me so sad..."

YES, THAT?! Why is us having the "bad girl" label on the front page more important than - oh, I don't know - us being kidnapped by a pedophile? Or being sold to some trafficking ring?! Or a person who kills children for a living- YOU GET WHAT I MEAN!

"It made my heart sink...and made me so fearful...honestly...!"

Yes, yes, bring out the waterworks, see if I care. Though Mafuyu would. But...unfortunately for Sadako, I can see things~!

"M-Mom..." I began, having that same shaky voice from earlier."

"W-What is it, Mayuri?"

"...you were there, watching us."

I could've sworn I saw Sadako's expression stiffen. "...what do you mean?"

"I...I saw you. You were watching us while talking to Dad on the phone. I thought you were going to go after us, but...you didn't. You just...watched us as we went to Phenny and didn't do anything."

Sadako froze. Did I get her? Was she actually planning this? Well, I have one more question.

"Mom...were you...planning to leave us?"

"Mayuri...that's enough..."

Mafuyu stepped in, a sad expression on her face. Did I...go too far? No, I needed answers. That's why I asked.

"Let's...just go home. I'm tired..."

Sadako, recovering from my deductions, took the chance and forced a smile. "...yes, I think we all need a break after this. Let's head home for the day. I need to start preparing dinner so that your father can come home at any time."

Sadako then took both of our hands and practically dragged us away from the park. I could hear Mafuyu asking Mom not to pull, but she wasn't listening. Damn...was I right then?

Was Sadako really going to leave us there? Or was she doing this to prove a point? If so, that's a really, REALLY bad way of doing it. You could've done it in many different ways, but not Sadako. Oh no. Definitely didn't enforce the idea in my mind that Sadako is a manipulative bitch.

But I scored a win today.

Mafuyu turned to look at me in confusion and I simply nodded with a smile: an expression of telling her that it's going to be okay.

That raised Mafuyu's spirit a little, and she smiled back.

Yeah, I'll consider this a win in my book.

Chapter Text

There's a lot of gray in this world.

And no, I'm not saying that because I am literally in a world of gray, no. And said world isn't all gray. The SEKAI, I mean - I think I see a faint sunset color on the horizon. It feels a lot less dead in here than it did back in my world. In gaming form, that is. Maybe because of my interference? Lots of things have changed, after all, but I'm getting off track.

Now, where was I? Ah, right.

By gray, I mean it metaphorically.

I've seen my fair share of struggles in my old life, so I think I'm qualified to say this. Remembering all that abuse in my old life and comparing it to the abuse I suffered in this new life, it feels like the old world prepared me a lot for this new life. For one, I have a heightened sense of when I was being manipulated. Comes with being lied to and toyed with my whole life until my parents' siblings took me in. Of course, there's a difference between being aware and acting on it...which leads me to a question:

Why are my emotions inconsistent with my thoughts?

I remember that event where Sadako left us at that park. Despite knowing what to do, I was scared for some reason. And then there's me crying and running to Mom to hug her because...what? Because I'm her daughter and I have a familial bond with her?

No. That can't be it, right? I thought I was convinced, body and soul, that Sadako was a bitch, but that day told me something else. I was overjoyed when I saw Mom. And I'm even subconsciously calling her Mom! I swear it isn't on purpose!

When I saw Sadako. My body, contrary to my thoughts, reacted that way, acting on its own. That further reinforces the fact that I am not from this world. I'm like a puppet being pulled by strings, deciding what emotions I should feel. It's like I'm just a character for someone's portrayal to tell some tale about a girl who hated her mother.

Does this mean my body isn't my own? That I'm somehow disconnected and connected at the same time? Or are these feelings part of me, as well?

Whatever. To hell with that - I am forging my path.

"ARE YOU TRULY CARVING YOUR OWN PATH?"

And there's the annoying thing I was waiting for.

Out of the empty space emerged a black mist, taking the shape of my silhouette. I couldn't see the face, but the outline was a perfect shape; I knew it was me.

The demon inside me.

I wanted to fight her again. So I came to the Empty SEKAI just to have a one-on-one conversation with her. There doesn't seem to be any Vocaloids present...well, apart from Miku earlier, whom I told not to let anyone interrupt me. Though it was surprising that she agreed to it rather easily, unlike a certain someone who dumped a bunch of annoying inquiries onto my face. Yes, I'm talking about you, KAITO. Seriously, why can't you just take a hint and give me peace?

The black mist taking my form crossed her arms. I could feel her smirking at me. Well, damn you, too, then.

"HOW IS IT YOUR PATH? HAVE YOU NOT CONSIDERED THE FACT THAT YOU ARE MERELY FOLLOWING THE SCRIPT?"

"Oh, shut up, demon. This world is already changing. Are you blind to everything?"

"I AM NOT BLIND. YOU HAD INDEED TAKEN MANY STEPS TO BE THE GOOD GIRL YOU ARE. HOW LAUGHABLE."

I tsked. "You're one annoying conversationalist, that's for sure."

"BUT I SPEAK THE TRUTH, DO I NOT? I AM-"

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, yeah, you're 'me.' I still call bullcrap on that."

The demon merely chuckled. I sighed.

"TRULY, A RECKLESS AND STUBBORN CHILD, YOU ARE. YOU AMUSE ME SO."

"I'd...rather I don't?"

"DO YOU DOUBT YOURSELF?"

"Alright, smartass."

The demon shook "her" head. I say her because, well, she looks like me. Duh.

"IT IS A SINCERE QUESTION."

I scoffed. "Again, are you blind? I'm seizing my life and changing the course of this story."

"TRULY, YOUR EFFORTS ARE ADMIRABLE. BUT HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THE POTENTIAL CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS?"

...what?

"What...consequences? I don't remember any negatives."

"HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE ACCIDENT THAT OCCURRED DURING YOUR GETAWAY?"

...oh.

Right.

That.

I, uh...didn't want to remember that, but...yeah.

It didn't feel like it was a few years ago...

"I believe...we need to do something for our children."

That sentence started it all.

It was around 5:00 PM, I think? I remember going down from my room to get water for myself. Y'know, as any responsible elder sister would do. I had successfully trekked down the harsh incline known as the stairs, navigated the labyrinthine spaces known as the hallway and room, and reached the treasure trove of priceless gold... known as a glass of water.

I'm in the body of a child. Let me have some imagination.

After drinking up that hearty fountain of eternal youth that graced my parched throat with the comforting frostiness of water, I made my way back to the stairs when I overheard those words.

Okay...what the hell is she planning this time?

Slightly peeking into the living room, I saw Sadako talking on the phone to someone. It was probably Dad, based on some bits of their conversation. It wasn't anything special until she said that one line:

"I believe...we need to do something for our children."

I hid behind the wall, trying to pick up whatever the hell kind of nonsense she's saying:

"...I am thinking of sending her to a better school. A school where she can learn everything without any interference."

...hah?

"Mafuyu...hasn't been performing as well as I expected lately...at this point, she will never become a doctor like she wanted."

...okay.

WHAT THE HELL?!

That's because you haven't been PAYING MUCH ATTENTION TO HER?! HELLO?!

Over the past few years, you have done nothing but push Mafuyu to be your "ideal good girl" ever since Mafuyu and I got lost in the park! You didn't spend much time with her; you only urged her to focus on her studies! You didn't even treat her like your daughter; you treated her like she was a robot! And you tried to control her...there are so many things you've done! And let's not forget how you basically neglected me and made me do my own thing in those same years. You should be thankful that I haven't ended up on the streets yet!

And you're seriously thinking of sending her away...away from her friends? Away from me?

Ugh. What else am I missing? Actually, what has she NOT done to Mafuyu? What has she NOT done to me?

And don't get me started on what she thinks she wants for her daughter. For me. What the hell kind of crap is she on to believe she knows what Mafuyu wants?!

"Mayuri...I don't know what to do with her..."

Oh? Speak thy name and she shall hear?

"Her grades are good, yes..."

Wow, just "good," huh? My scores are just as good as Mafuyu's, mind you. Yeah, it is slightly lower than Mafuyu's, but I am still the second best! I guess she conveniently forgets that because all of the glory goes to our Lord and Saviour, Mafuyu Asahina. Or Asahina Mafuyu- eh, whatever.

"...sometimes it feels like I can't control her. She's...I don't know what to do..."

Again, what? I am pretty sure you have some degree of control over me simply because you're my mom. But never mind that: Why is THAT your main problem?! Oh, I am doing pretty well at school despite what others think of me, but my attitude is a problem? Why does it sound like you're about to use the "protect our reputation" excuse?

"What do I think...? I think...sending her to a correctional school would help. She...she might be a bad influence on Mafuyu. It could help her be a better role model for her sister."

...

...

...

Wow. Okay. Alright. Very nice.

...

I can't describe how much anger I have in my chest right now.

First off, yeah: the obvious being she thinks I'm a worthy delinquent to be sent to what's essentially a prison for children.

But the second...she's planning on separating the two of us.

Right there, I realized.

No.

She can't.

Not just because I can't help Mafuyu, but that also means I can't monitor what Mom would do to her. I wouldn't be able to protect her.

...

Damn it.

I can't think straight.

As soon as I saw her hang up the call, I stepped out of my hiding place. As Sadako turned around, she quickly saw me, standing in the middle of the living room, glaring at her in disbelief. Very quickly, Sadako realized that I had heard everything and tried to sugarcoat the situation.

"O-Oh! Mayuri, I didn't know you were here..."

"Mom...tell me it wasn't true."

My tone was dangerously low, and my voice was on the verge of breaking; this isn't me feeling this...but at that moment, my soul might as well be of the same mind as this body. My emotions flared up again, and I clenched my fist to keep my anger in check for a level-headed conversation.

"Sweetie...you should probably-"

"No, Mom. Please...tell me the truth. Are you...going to separate us?"

I could almost see the gears turning in that woman's head. I didn't know what was going to happen so...I stood still. I continued to stand still. Even as she slowly walked towards me. Even as she lowered herself for me, to see each other eye to eye, as if to be on the same level as me.

She reached out and gently touched both of my shoulders. But deep down, I could sense that something was wrong. My sixth sense could tell that she was about to spout bullcrap.

"Mayuri, I...I wanted to make both of you happy. Both you and Mafuyu. I saw that...Mafuyu wasn't performing as well as she should, and you were...you were being difficult. And it hurts me, Mayuri-"

Sadako places a hand to her chest, as if to gesture that she is indeed hurt because of me.

"-it hurts to see you like this. You were being a bad girl who wasn't listening to what I told you. And as a result, your teachers don't like you, your classmates are afraid of you, and...you have disappointed me, Mayuri."

She then strokes my head.

"I know you're better than this. I know you can be a good sister to Mafuyu. But you aren't."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Yeah, right. I don't think you realize how much more confident Mafuyu has become because of me. Why do you think she's still pushing on despite lacking love from you? It's because I was the only, and THE ONLY, person who kept encouraging her to be herself. To be what she wants to be. To not only make others happy, but to make herself happy as well.

But me being her crutch isn't enough, damn it! She needs you! YOU! The mother! The woman who gave birth to the Golden Child! She needs your warm approval and encouragement! She needs an adult who could guide her and not be manipulated by your whims!

As much as I hate admitting...Mom does care for us. I know that for sure. All those years growing up in this family, all those years as everything started going downhill...I can, for sure, say that Mom...really does love us.

A shame that she doesn't know that she's being a bitch.

"So...I decided that Mafuyu needs to be enrolled in a better school. A school that will help her achieve her goal. To keep her away from bad influences."

"B-Bad...?"

"Yes, Mayuri. You are being a bad girl. And you are teaching your sister to one as well."

My voice...oh god, that croaking.

I was really close to just blowing up in front of her face, but by some miracle, I held myself back...and settled for a bewildered expression.

Sadako pushed even further. It was at this point that I felt a pit form in my stomach as she continued to justify...and convince me that her way is right.

"Mayuri...this is for your sister. You love her as much as I do, right? Then you have to do this for her, too. If you genuinely care about her, you would understand this is for the best. She has a lot of potential; I am sure you have noticed. She deserves a bright future."

I nodded.

"But your influence on her...might complicate things. If this were to continue, she may not be able to succeed in her goal. You don't want that, don't you? You don't want to steal that light away from her, right, Mayuri?"

BULLSHIIIIIIII-CRRRRRRAP. BULLCRAP.

"I know you are a good sister. I know how important she is to you....and I know you understand me. So...you need to let her go. For her sake and yours."

I took a deep breath.

"M-Mom...I-I get it. I-I understand that you love her..."

Sadako slightly smiled. "Yes, Mayuri, so would you-"

"B-But...do you even know what Mafuyu wants to do?"

Sadako looked surprised but thoughtful for a moment; it looked like I caught her off guard. I answered her before she could try to redirect the conversation. "She...wants to be a nurse."

"A...nurse?"

I nodded. "Yes...she wants to help people. Do you...remember the time when she was sick and you took care of her?"

"...yes, I do." Sadako could remember that much.

"She...no, we...we saw how much you cared. You...I remember going with you to the hospital when she got sick, and I was hugging you to keep warm...you kept both of us warm. After that? She...wanted to become a nurse to help people, just like how you helped her. Helped me."

I managed to look at her directly in the eye. "When Mafuyu and I were alone...she told me about how you took care of her. How much love you gave her and how...warm you were."

Sadako's eyes widened a tiny bit but quickly recovered.

"And I know this, too, Mom. I thought you were going to tell me to stay at home and wait for Dad when I asked if I could go with you...but you agreed. You told me I could also come to take care of Mafuyu."

I sturdied myself.

"Mafuyu...when we were alone, she told me she wanted to become a nurse. She...she wanted to give that same warm feeling to other people. To be able to comfort them in bad times and good...to tell people that everything will be okay. B-But...!"

I took a small step back from her embrace and shook my head. I was nearly at the point of sobbing, but I held it in for a little longer, just enough for me to still make sense.

"Y-Y-You're trying to take that away from her..."

"Take...away...?"

My eyes were wet, but my mind felt clear. "Y-You didn't even ask what she wanted to be... You were only thinking about what you believe is best for her, but you never asked her opinion!"

Sadako's eyes widened before narrowing in offense. "I am her mother. I know what is best for her; what is best for you!"

"D-Do you?!"

"Yes-"

"You don't!"

Sadako had stood up. I was still a preteen, so she was taller...but I didn't waver, even as both of our emotions began clashing with each other. I firmly believed that Mom was only going to make things worse. I was scared; they're probably not my emotions, just my body's emotions...

Mom was angry...but I was determined.

"Don't talk to your mother like that," she reprimanded.

"T-Then don't treat Mafuyu like she's nothing!" I responded with a comeback.

"Nothing? She's my daughter! She's everything that you aren't!"

Ow. Way to go, Mom. But I'm not done yet!

"A-And what?! She's supposed to be you?! B-But...you don't even know what she wants to do, let alone what she likes! Did you ever stop and think about how she feels about all this...?!"

Sadako shook her head in denial, pondering my words briefly before reaffirming her stance. "No...you must be lying. A nurse...? Being a doctor has always been Mafuyu's dream; that is what she has aimed for her whole life! All those years of effort and those restless nights studying..."

"Mom, it doesn't mean anything if it just makes her sad all the time! You're making her do what you want, not what she wants!" I rebutted.

Mom threw it back. "No. I refuse to believe this! I chose this career for her because it is the best option for her! She can't be unhappy about this; that's impossible!" She pointed an accusing finger at me. "Aren't you being selfish by wanting to waste all of Mafuyu's efforts?"

Some time during this argument, Mafuyu had come down the stairs to see both of us fighting. I didn't notice at the time.

"She...she found her goal, and she wants to finish that. You...you're the one being selfish by forcing her to do what you want instead of helping her with her goal!" I countered. She remained silent.

I continued.

"A-And me being a bad sister...? M-Maybe...but I was there for her when she needed me! I-I asked her what she felt...what she wanted to do...what she wanted to become in the future... I supported her, motivated her to be herself; to be the best person she can be...!"

My rage finally reached its tipping point, and at this point, I should be sobbing...but anger had taken the reins with this one.

"I had to do all of that...and you said NOTHING to me. You didn't praise me for getting good grades. You didn't help me with anything! You...you ABANDONED ME, Mom!"

Sadako was shaken by that declaration. In the corner of my eye, Mafuyu looked close to crying. Only then did I notice that she was there. But I didn't hold back.

Mafuyu needs to know.

Mafuyu needs to know that she isn't the only person who's suffering.

Mafuyu needs to know that Mom...is hurting me, as well.

3

"You gave up on me simply because I wasn't like Mafuyu. You stopped caring about what I did because you thought I was beyond help. You never gave me a chance. But the worst part...? You focused all your attention on my sister, and you still managed to hurt her!"

2

"Why, Mom?! Why are you like this?!"

1

"How could you even call yourself a mother?!"

SLAP.

I felt my whole body twist to the side as I tumbled down to the floor. The slap...Mom's slap stung. It hurt.

But nothing hurt me more than seeing Mafuyu hurt...and seeing Mom turn out like this.

I saw Mafuyu run towards me, kneeling by my side and checking me. I could see Mom with a horrified expression. Was that slap out of instinct, I wonder?

But that didn't matter. That was enough for me.

"NOW'S YOUR CHANCE. PUNCH HER. STRIKE HER DOWN. MAKE HER FEEL WHAT YOU FEEL!"

I didn't even realize that the demon had resurfaced in my head, influencing my thoughts. Without thinking, I quickly stood up...and threw a punch at her face.

"M-MAYU-"

Mafuyu tried to yell to get me to stop, but my fist hit true. I hit Mom on the cheek, causing her to fall backwards with a grunt.

...

...

...

Only then did I realize what I did.

I could feel the hate inside me burn my eyes, glaring at Sadako as if I was trying to burn a hole into her chest. My cheeks were a wet mess.

Mom slowly sat up, shocked at what I had done. Mafuyu was horrified. I was terrified. We were all stunned at what I did.

...

All I could think of was running. So I did.

"...Mafuyu. We're leaving."

I grabbed Mafuyu and began to pull her. Mafuyu, confused, was about to say something, but kept her mouth shut when she saw our Mom. She almost looked shell-shocked.

Mom's expression slowly widened as she saw us leave, and weakly reached out for us. "W-Wait, Mayuri-!"

"Don't...say anything, Sadako."

My tone...it was so full of condemnation that I could've sworn Mom died right then and there. The way I spat her name out of my mouth like it was venom...the refusal to call her my mother, like an indirect denouncement of her as my parent...

I think I screwed up big time.

I knew that, deep down, I had made a big mistake. Maybe I pushed too far.

...no, I definitely did.

And as I pulled Mafuyu with me, her protesting to slow down, my state of mind was hazy. We ran barefoot. I couldn't think straight. All I could think of was getting away.

I want to. I need to.

I don't want to look.

Because I'm scared that I will make it worse.

I'm scared.

I'm-

"M-MAYURI!"

I was so deep in my berating thoughts that I didn't realize a vehicle was rapidly approaching us. The horn was loud, frantic...

Out of instinct, I shoved Mafuyu away from me before I felt the car crash into me-

Chapter Text

As Kanade Yoisaki shut the door to her father's room behind her, she sighed.

How many times has she visited now? She lost count after five. Since dropping out and living alone in her own house, visiting her only remaining parent had become a routine for her. It wasn’t something she had to remind herself to do; it came naturally to her to visit her only parent, who would never wake up.

It was one of the ways the poor, white-haired girl would cope with her situation. Still, the events surrounding her life did not kill her musical drive.

Kanade has had a natural talent for music. That was clear to her since childhood. Her mother appreciated it, her father recognized it. It was as simple as that. They were happy that she had such a wonderful gift. A happy family. A happy life.

I̸t̵ ̸w̶a̴s̷ ̵r̷a̷t̶h̸e̶r̶ ̴u̶n̷f̵o̷r̴t̴u̸n̷a̴t̶e̴ ̴t̶h̶a̵t̷ ̸s̷h̸e̴ ̵w̶a̶s̵ ̴r̸e̸s̵p̷o̴n̶s̴i̶b̴l̴e̵ ̴f̴o̸r̴ ̷h̵e̵r̸ ̵f̴a̴t̶h̷e̸r̸'̴s̵ ̴m̷e̸n̶t̷a̷l̵ ̶d̶e̶m̷i̴s̸e̵.̴ It is rather unfortunate that her father collapsed soon after. Followed by her mother.

Kanade had long felt the weight of her father's condition, believing she was at fault. It was as if her extraordinary gift, once a blessing, had transformed into a curse. Every light casts a shadow, and sometimes good intentions lead to unforeseen consequences.

Hope ultimately prevailed, even if only slightly. If her music can have such a profound impact on others, perhaps she can use it to help them as well. She might be able to pierce the darkness that shrouds their vision or reignite the fire that has been extinguished in their hearts. Plus, it was her way of atoning for the greatest sin committed by her against her own family.

As she took the elevator down and approached the exit, Kanade was met with a startling sight. Several paramedics and doctors hurried down the hallway, pushing a stretcher. As they got closer, she overheard them discussing the situation of their emergency patient. The one thing she distinctly heard was:

"...wasn’t a high-speed impact. It’s a miracle she survived..."

As Kanade stepped aside to let them through, she caught a glimpse of the person on the stretcher, and it briefly took her breath away. It was a girl with short purple hair, her bangs brushing above her left eye. A bloodied gash on her forehead indicated that she had suffered a blunt force injury. According to the doctors, this injury appeared to have been caused by a car. What was truly shocking, however, was the girl's identity.

She appeared to be around Kanade's age. There was something about her that seemed so familiar. In fact, Kanade felt she was distinctly recognizable. Wasn't that girl on a poster Kanade had seen once?

Then there was another girl running alongside the doctors, the one with longer hair—she also looked familiar.

The white-haired girl finally recalled the names: Mafuyu and Mayuri. If she remembered correctly, these two girls were consistently the central figures in the school’s promotions, mostly Mafuyu. They appeared in nearly every poster, school photo, and school event—they were almost always present. In fact, she remembered reaching out to them online once for help; she needed a specific book on a particular subject. Mafuyu and Mayuri were the first to respond to her request.

She recalled how patient Mafuyu was and how lively Mayuri was. They were different in many ways, with the only connection between them being their shared hair color. The chemistry they shared left a strong impression on her.

But to see them in this state...

Kanade watched as the doctors quickly pushed her into the emergency room, with Mafuyu being told to stay outside. Mafuyu, with great reluctance, stayed out of the room as she blankly stared at the door. She looked like she was trying to open the door telepathically...before slowly trudging to a nearby row of chairs situated in front of the emergency room, crashing onto one of the seats...and quietly weeping.

She leaned forward as if unable to support the crushing weight of her grief, and covered her face with her hands. It wasn't a wail, but the emotions spilling out of her could be felt across the hallway. And Kanade could certainly feel it.

Kanade wanted to reach out, but she wasn't sure what to say. Aside from the time those two girls helped her, she knew next to nothing about them. How could she convey such empathy with mere words? What are even the correct words to say in this situation? It was a truly daunting task, considering the state the girl was in and what she was thinking.

However, as she stood there watching the purple-haired girl quietly weep, Kanade felt an increasing urge to comfort her. The sorrow radiating from Mafuyu filled the atmosphere with a heaviness that hadn’t been there before.

Mafuyu's sobbing seemed to become more frantic: she was struggling to breathe.

Kanade couldn't bear to see it.

"No. I can't just watch like this."

So she took a step forward. Then another. Until she was slowly approaching the grief-stricken girl...and reached out.

-

Mafuyu couldn't think.

She couldn't think at all during the trip to the hospital, while running alongside Mayuri's stretcher, and as she watched her sister being taken into the emergency room. She couldn't comprehend what was happening. But when she finally did...she broke. Her tears finally broke down the dam, and she felt as if her entire world was collapsing.

What now? Is her sister even okay? Is she even going to live?

Is she going to die?

YES. SHE IS GOING TO DIE. AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.

Mafuyu felt her heart bursting with heavy emotions. Why didn't she do anything? Why did she stand there, letting Mayuri take her away and leading them to their near deaths? She couldn't react fast enough. She couldn't simply tell Mayuri to stop and think. She just had to be too caught up in the moment. Well done, Mafuyu. MAYBE YOU'RE THE REASON WHY MAYURI IS TEETERING BETWEEN LIFE AND DEATH.

Her thoughts were drowning in sharp beratings, self-deprecation, and insults. Maybe she shouldn't have allowed her sister into her life. Because of her, she's in there, and she's sitting out here. Her mom is broken, and now Mayuri is going too...who would survive the impact of a car?

Maybe she should-

Mafuyu felt a hand on her shoulder, and she jerked her head to see a white-haired girl looking at her with concern.

It was a pleasant surprise, and Mafuyu appreciated this girl's ability to act in this moment of necessity. Although Mafuyu couldn't help but feel somewhat guarded against this stranger who had suddenly entered her life.

This stranger...Mafuyu remembered the time she and Mayuri had broken a promise to Sadako, but this time...things felt different. This girl seemed...familiar. Had she met her somewhere?

"Are you...okay?"

The girl's voice sounded like a whisper, as if she had not used it in a long time. Yes, she had met her before...but where?

Mafuyu couldn't say anything, nor react to the question. No, she's not okay. Her sister had just been...

The girl sat next to her, seeming awkward and unsure of what to do, but her expression showed true empathy. She was trying to help. It was...comforting.

But what can that girl do for her?

The girl reached for Mafuyu's hands to hold them, as if to reassure her.

"I...I know how it feels. That feeling of losing someone important. I went through something similar."

Mafuyu's eyes widened. The white-haired girl's words stirred something in her. Understanding - she understood. That alone...made her feel a little better.

"I don't know what happened...but I'm sure she'll be fine. Don't lose hope."

No words could describe such emotions within Mafuyu. So she simply nodded.

Maybe...with the white girl's help, she can get through this.

"HMM. HOW DO YOU REMEMBER THAT?"

I rolled my eyes. "That was Mafuyu's narrative. She told me how Kanade came up to her and comforted her while I was having an anime battle against death."

Or rather, facing a black screen for the majority of the time and floating as if I had downed several shots of tequila and ridden a roller coaster shortly after.

"It was after I woke up. By the way, I'm still angry over the fact that you influenced me to punch Mom. I thought you weren't going to interfere."

"I DID NOT. I MERELY INFLUENCED YOU, AS YOU SAID."

"Alright, you smartass."

I sighed. I have gotten this far, right? There's no reason for me to back down now. All my Project Sekai life, leading to the main story...this is my second chance. And I won't throw it away.

"About your question earlier...no, I don't have doubts. And I won't. I've committed myself to seeing this through. And you...you will not sway me to your whims!"

The shadow demon chuckles and...disappears. Goddamn, is she an annoying bitch. So, what now? Guess I'll go back to my room and-"

"Mayuri?"

I almost jumped as I turned around to see Kanade standing there with a concerned expression etched on her face...oh.

Oh god.

She saw me talking to myself, didn't she?

Well, this is going to be awkward...I composed myself and offered a smile...at least, I hope it was.

"H-Hello, Kanade! What are you...doing here?"

That...was the worst acting I have ever done. And I'm pretty good at acting, mind you. I can fool anyone into believing I'm a different person with the right amount of makeup and clothing.

It was Mizuki's idea. Don't ask why.

"I was trying to call you, but you didn't answer. It's nearly one o'clock."

Oh, right...25:00. Must've been so focused in my thoughts then...wait.

How would Kanade know I was here? She wouldn't know that I was in the Empty Sekai unless...someone told her...oh.

KAITO, you annoying bastard. What part of "I need to be alone" did you not understand?! UGH!

"Oh, yeah. I almost forgot...did KAITO tell you I was here?"

Kanade didn't answer. That was enough for me, however. I sighed exasperatedly. "That annoying synthesizer, can't take a hint..."

Kanade, however, didn't seem to look like she was here just to tell me that it's nearly time. We've known each other for a few years; it started with that hospital visit, so I think I can confidently say I can read her thoughts...almost.

I raised an eyebrow, slightly tilting my head to the side and crossing my arms. "Is there more?"

Kanade hesitated for a moment before committing to asking the question:

"Is...is there something wrong, Mayuri?"

Ah...the fabled concerned Kanade. My favorite.

"...no, nothing's wrong, Kanade. What's this about?"

...yeah, I knew that wasn't a good response. She was still looking at me with that apprehensive face of hers. She most likely saw me talking to myself.

If I didn't mention it already...for some reason, only I see that shadow thing. Me, and no one else.

From what I discovered from other people (and Mafuyu, much to my unfortunate luck), once everyone suddenly disappears in my field of view and that demon appears, I start talking to myself. According to them, sometimes I'm having conversations with no one in particular, even though I am talking directly to said demon. Other times, I'm muttering to myself as if I'm some unstable person. Which is really inconvenient, mind you, as these "schizo" events happen at such infrequent timing...and when they do happen, they usually strike me when I'm in a populated area or when I'm in a conversation with someone; my train of thought just derails until someone snaps me out of it.

Only Mafuyu knows about it, since, well, I live in the same comfortable abode as her. She often asked if I was okay, but I just hand-waved it off. It's not like I'm harming anyone with my "condition," right? Luckily, Mizuki and Ena haven't seen me doing that...but now that Kanade saw me...

Eh, thinking about it now, guess there was no reason to hide it in the first place. Still, I'd rather hide it. It's more convenient and saves the effort of explaining all of that. Besides, I don't want them wasting their worries on me.

"It's okay if you don't tell me," Kanade reassured me. "I'm just...concerned for you."

I took a deep breath and let the air out of my lungs. "No...no, I-I...I think you deserve to know, at least. But, um...how much did you hear?"

"I didn't hear the whole thing...but I did hear you talking about 'not being swayed.'"

Thankfully, not the whole conversation.

I let my arms fall to my sides. "Do you...remember the time when I was in the hospital?"

Kanade nodded. "Mm. You were hospitalized because of a car crash, right?"

"I assume Mafuyu told you the whole story?"

Kanade shook her head. "Only some of it... All I knew was that you fought with your mother, and it resulted in you running away with Mafuyu. Then you pushed Mafuyu out of the way of a car and...that's how you ended up with a broken arm."

I huffed softly. "Just enough, huh? But...she didn't tell you why we ran away."

Kanade shook her head.

I went to sit on a nearby elevated platform. "Well, my mom...she was planning on sending Mafuyu to a different school. Away from me and her friends. Because she thought I was a bad influence on her, and I was hindering her from doing well in her studies."

Kanade looked stunned before confusion rapidly overtook her face. "But you said you were helping her study."

"...exactly."

Kanade didn't seem to get the whole picture yet, based on her reaction. I sighed. "Mom told me I was a bad influence on her, saying that I was being difficult. She was going to send Mafuyu to a better school, where she won't get distracted and finally become a doctor. Mom was even planning on sending me to a correctional school. But..."

I felt my anger flare up again. I clenched my hands into fists. "She doesn't know Mafuyu. She doesn't even know what Mafuyu wants to be. Instead, she's forcing all these things on her in the guise of 'making her an ideal girl...' Tch, what kind of logic is that? How can she say that and not know anything about her own daughter? Not even me?"

I lowered my head.

"I was the only one who cared for Mafuyu the entire time...and she has the gall to pretend that she knows what's best for us? She didn't even think about what Mafuyu would feel...she didn't even think about me."

Kanade had sat down beside me, looking at me with empathetic eyes. I didn't notice.

"I did all the work. I did just as well as Mafuyu. I urged Mafuyu...my sister...I encouraged her to be the best version of herself. And yet, Mom said nothing. Like I wasn't there."

"Mayuri..."

I could feel the tears well up. There was no stopping it. "I couldn't be angry at Mafuyu - she was hurt too. All that pressure and expectations, pushing her down like that...Mom had no regard for either of our feelings on the matter. She always made the decisions she thought were best for us. But she never asked us, let alone talked to us about that... She hurt both of us."

I finally raised my head...with decently wet eyes to show.

I'm crying. Again.

"...it hurts. It really hurts. Because she wasn't always like this. S-She wasn't always like this...! S-She-"

I was starting to choke on my words...wait, am I really opening myself up to her? Why does she need to hear this?

Why am I crying again? Is this really my emotions? And now I'm...leaning towards her...she's now gently stroking my head...

...okay, you know what? This feels really comfortable and I don't know why. I shouldn't be doing this. I'm supposed to be changing the story here, so why do I need to rely on...them? They're just fictional characters in the end, right? As much as I'm living a life here in this game, it's not like they're real people...

No. No, why am I thinking that? Kanade is trying to comfort me; that much is obvious. I could feel her hand combing through my hair - that qualifies as this world being real, right? And I promised to live my second life here. To seize this second chance...

"...sorry for that."

"You don't need to apologize."

We had a moment of silence together, and she was still holding my head.

"...am I a bad sister?"

"E-Eh?"

"Am I being a bad example to her?"

Kanade seemed to hesitate at my question. Maybe I shouldn't have asked that...

"I don't know the whole picture. But from what you told me...you did the best you could."

"I don't think so..."

"You helped Mafuyu. You helped your sister."

I...didn't know what to say. So I just stayed in that same position, leaning against Kanade and letting her sweep my sorrows away.

"...Mafuyu was just talking about you."

That made me stop leaning on her. "...huh?"

"She was telling me about everything you did. Helping her in her studies, encouraging her, talking to her...she told me how you cared for her in so many ways. How...she couldn't have gotten to where she is without you. And hearing your side of your story...I'm convinced."

"That...?"

"Mafuyu loves you, Mayuri. So yes, you're not a bad sister. You're the best sister Mafuyu could ever have."

Oh god. I could feel my face burning. I jerked my head away.

That feels so embarrassing to hear. But...good. At least everything I've done wasn't for nothing.

"I-I don't think it's much of a big deal. I had to do it. I had to. The circumstances didn't really give me a choice."

"And you did. You did care for her. And that's more than what your mother had done," Kanade continued to assert. "And Mayuri?"

"Y-Yeah?"

Kanade gave me what looks like a gentle look of a scolding mother. "You're not alone anymore. You have me. Me, Mizuki, Ena...you can rely on us if you need help."

I gently shook my head. "I don't want to burden you..."

"I won't force you...but if you need help, I'm here for you."

Kanade...oh, Kanade, I don't deserve your empathy. If only you knew what kind of person I used to be...you wouldn't be saying that. And considering who you are... Do you really care for me, or is this for your self-interest?

Of course, the barebones knowledge in this library of mine (my mind) says that she helps people to atone for supposedly killing her dad...? At least, that's what I remember. But it's not actually her fault, it's her dad being an idiot and pushing himself too hard and all that...

Anyway, I don't want to rely on her too much. Wouldn't I be encouraging her savior complex by doing this?

...no, hold on, this might be a beneficial deal! I think.

We've been friends for a few years now, but with that offer she's giving me, I can potentially monitor her as well. Her food intake, her physical health...her overall health, really - I can keep an eye on her and make sure she's taking care of herself. Properly.

Yeah, that'll work.

"...thank you, Kanade."

I took a deep breath. "There's...also another thing I want to tell you."

"What is it?" Kanade asked with a slight tilt of her head.

...actually, on second thought, maybe not.

"... nevermind. It's not important."

Kanade looked confused but thankfully didn't look further into it.

Thank god she didn't ask about the "schizophrenia" bit...

Chapter Text

This is getting boring.

How so, sir?

So far, all we've done is developed the beginning of the story for the sake of future conflicts, but that's all we've done.

Isn't that a good thing, sir? We are getting good results...

No. It will eventually become stale. There's too little conflict. According to the game's timeline, we should be around after the beginning of N25. We've only started right before that. We'll need to speed up the process.

But sir, considering the risks. We could potentially deviate from the script too early if we force the process.

Then we don't force the process. Make it subtle. Our female lead has issues, right? Capitalize on that. Kanade is smart enough to see the signs, all we need to do is guide her and further exploit her savior complex. That will accelerate both of their issues without too much interference from our end.

S-Sir, permission to speak about that...

Fire away.

I-Isn't that plan risky? What we're doing is basically developing a potential relationship between these two girls. A-And as far as I know, the policy says...

Keep it subtle, I know. I am well-aware of the potential risks of shifting the relationship from MafuyuXKanade to MayuriXKanade. But it doesn't need to be grand. Kanade still thinks that her music can save people. So...let's extend that target to two people. It wouldn't be too much of a change and we can still have an adjustable story. Everyone wins: the fans don't complain about their ship sinking, and we can still maintain our research and trials.

...alright, sir. I will trust your judgement.

We have to. What we're doing is illegal and treading dangerous territory of interdimensional science. I just hope that the yields outweigh the potential hazards.