Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Rody rubs his gray-green orbs, waking up as the morning light begins to creep through his window. Stifling a yawn, he gets out of bed, pulling his long reddish-brown hair into a messy bun. He knows Manon is surely downstairs waiting for him, making their breakfast. He quickly gets dressed, pulling on some tan slacks, a gray long-sleeved shirt, and a whitish-tan overshirt, rolled up at the sleeves and left unbuttoned. He walks over to the mirror, looking at his incredibly stocky 5’7 frame, as his grayish-green orbs stare back at him. As if on cue, he hears Manon calling him downstairs for breakfast.
He sighs, making his way downstairs to meet her. However, when he enters the kitchen, Manon looks upset. She looks up at him, worry dancing across her glittering brown orbs. “Manon? What's wrong, did something happen?”
She sighs, her upper lip wavering as she opens her mouth to speak “Rody, I need to tell you something. I-i-i-i-i-i-im so sorry!”
Rody furrows his brows “What? What do you mean?”
She looks up at him, tears beginning to glisten in her big brown orbs. “I-i-i-i-i-i had to sell you, t-t-t-to pay off our debts.”
Rodys jaw drops, as he stares at her in horror. “HUUUUUHHHHH?!?!?!?!?!?!?”
Manon looks down, wiping the tears forming in her brown orbs. “Y-y-your new masters will be here soon.” Rody notices a bag on the floor with his name on it, seemingly full of his important belongings and clothes. She walks up to Rody pressing a locket into his hands. “Here, wear it always and think of me.”
Just as Rody opens his mouth to try to make sense of all the confusion, he hears the door open behind him. He turns around, and there they are: the Side Characterz. “W-w-w-w-what?! Who are you?!” Rody exclaims. They introduce themselves as Forcas, Vince, Winnie, Bryce, McCoy, and Bakugo: the members of the brand-new upcoming boy band!

Chapter Text

“Wait, what?” Rody asks. “Manon, what’s going on? What are you talking about? You can’t be serious. You didn’t really sell me to them, right?”
Manon looks away. “It’s complicated. It’s just for one year! It won’t be so bad. You’ll just be staying with them and helping them out- like an assistant!” She sighs, “Besides, we need the money.”
“But we didn’t talk about this! You-” Rody pulls her into another room away from the band, “-You did this behind my back? How could you? I didn’t agree to any of this!”
“I didn’t have a choice, Rody! I didn’t tell you, but the mob has been coming after me for a while, they’ve been demanding the money-”
“Woah, woah, woah, the mob?!?” Rody cuts her off.
“I told you I was in debt,” she shrugs.
“I thought it was to the bank! You’ve been in debt with the mob this whole time???”
“I thought you would be mad.”
“Oh my god, the mob? Manon, are you crazy? They could have hurt me! Or worse, they could have hurt you!”
“So you are mad,” She frowns.
“Dude!” He exclaims.
“I’m fine now! It isn’t a problem anymore.”
Rody rubs his temple. “Whatever, what’s this all have to do with those guys in our kitchen?” He gestures towards The Side Characterz, who are standing around awkwardly.
“Well, one night I was running from one of the members of the mob when he cornered me in an alleyway. I thought I was done for!”
Concern washes over Rody’s face. “Did he hurt you?”
“I’m fine. But only because that guy,” she points at the man who called himself Bryce, “stepped out of a nearby bar. He saw what was happening and rushed over. I think he was drunk.”
“Yeah he looks like he’d get drunk.”
“Anyway, he stepped over and said to the mobster ‘What’s going on here?’ and then the mobster told him how in debt I was-”
“How in debt were you?” Rody asks.
Manon looks around the room, avoiding his question. “Umm…”
“Nevermind,” Rody says quickly, “I don’t want to know. Continue the story.”
“Right, so the mobster threatens him, but then he pays off my debt, right there in the alley!”
“Woah, no way!”
“I know right! So I go to thank him, but then he starts to get weird. He said that now I was in debt to him! He told me his band needed a manager, and that a cute girl like me would be perfect for the job.”
“Manon, please don’t tell me you sold me to a creep!”
“I was getting uncomfortable, then one of his friends came out, that one,” She points at the man named Vince. “He got the blond one away from me and apologized, he said that happened a lot.”
Rody buries his hands in his face. “You really did sell me to creep!”
“I didn’t want to! When the black haired one found out the blond one had spent all the band's money, he was furious! I thought he was going to kill him! I told him I was sorry for causing so much trouble, and I told him that at least you would be happy. He got really interested when I mentioned you.”
“Oh my god, Manon, you sold me to a faggot!”
“Sorry. Anyway, that’s when the rest of the band came out looking for the two of them. When the black haired one told them what happened, the rest of them were very upset. They had just lost one million euros on some girl they didn’t know!”
“One million euros!” Rody blurts out. “Is that how much you owed to the mob?” Manon nods slowly. “Wow. Ok. Not gonna focus on that. What happened next?”
“The band was really upset, they were broke now after all. They couldn’t get the money back. One of them suggested that they should hire me as their manager. I tried to advocate against it, but they said I should do it, you know, in exchange for getting me out of debt with the mob. That’s when the black haired one remembered you. He said that you might work better, that you could go in my place.”
“And you said yes?”
“Well, yeah! I didn’t want to be stuck with six guys! Especially not after I met that creep!”
“Yeah, I wouldn’t want to either. And I don't want to! Was there seriously nothing else you could have done?”
“I was desperate, Rody!” She grabs his hand. “I didn’t want to do this to you, I promise. But they backed me into a corner. What else was I supposed to do?” She looks like she might cry.
Rody can think of a lot of other things she could have done, but he bites his tongue. He doesn’t want Manon to cry, no matter how upset he is at her. “It’s alright. I get it. Really, it's alright. It’s only a year, yeah?” Manon nods. “That’s barely any time at all.” He pulls her close, wrapping her in a hug. “I’ll be ok. Don’t worry about me.”
She pats him on the back. “I wasn’t planning on it. You can handle yourself. I trust you.” She pulls away and smiles at him. “Now, let’s go out and see the band, ok?”
Rody hesitates, but takes her hand anyway. “Yeah. Let’s talk to them.”
They walk out to the kitchen, where The Side Characterz have been waiting for the last seven minutes. “Finally, you extras are here. We thought we’d be waiting here forever.” The spiky-blond haired one remarks.
“Yeah, you guys fight like my parents did before they got divorced,” The gray-haired one adds.
The blond one from the alley glances at Manon, before turning to speak to Rody. “Hey man, we should probably introduce ourselves better. I'm Chase Beckley, the coolest member of the band.”
Rody frowns. “Wait, I thought your name was Bryce?”
Chase/Bryce stares at him. “It is.”
Rody furrows his brows. “Then why did you say your name was Chase?”
“Because it is.” He grins, before getting cut off by one of the other members.
The other member is also blond, but he has a bandage covering one of his eyes and is a bit taller than Bryce. “Just ignore him, he's always like this.”
Rody somehow looks even more confused. “What-”
“Just- dont worry about it. None of us know his real name, we call him Co-worker, because, well, he's our Co-worker.”
“Why not Bandmate then? Wouldn't that be more accurate?”
The whole band looks at him like he's stupid. “No. Why would we do that?”
Rody quickly changes the subject, embarrassed. “Uh, nevermind. What's your name then?”
He smiles. “I’m Forcas, the leader of the band, and the main vocalist.” He elbows Rody, whispering “Don’t listen to Co-worker, I’m the coolest member.” He pulls away, pointing to yet another blond member. “That’s Winnie, the baby of the group.”
Winnie smiles and waves enthusiastically “Hi!!”
Forcas points over to the black-haired emo looking one, who's been staring at Rody since he walked in. “That's Vincent, our resident bad boy.” Vincent flips his hair back, revealing his blackish-brown eyes. He says nothing and keeps staring at Rody. “...Ok,” Forcas continues, “Over there’s McCoy, the surfer heartthrob. He loves long walks on the beach and keeping his shirt unbuttoned.”
“Not my fault I got incredible abs, yo.” McCoy pulls back his shirt to reveal his “incredible abs.” Rody thinks they’re ok.
“Finally,” Forcas points at the spiky-haired blond, “We have Bakugo. He, um, well,” Forcas thinks for a second. “Bakugo, what exactly is it that you do?”
“Ummm…” Bakugo joins Forcas in thinking. “I, uh, I can play the drums?”
“Really?” Forcas asks. “You’ve never played the drums for us. You just sing and dance like everyone else.”
Bakugo looks away. “I can rap too.”
“Then why have we never heard you rap before?”
“Maybe because you never asked,” He mutters. “Here, I’ll prove it to you.” Bakugo clears his throat. “My love for you is real, and you make my heart go real. No one else makes me feel this way, and even if I could find a replacement, they nothing compared to you, babe.”
His rap is so terrible that Forcas stops him before he can say anymore. “Ok, sure, you can rap. You don’t have to keep going, we get it.” Forcas turns back to Rody. “So yeah, that’s the band. Dank or what?”
Rody pulls Manon to him and whispers in her ear. “Manon these people are insane, I can’t do this.”
“Of course you can!” She whispers back. “Besides, it’s not like we can give them their money back! The mob has it!”
“We never signed a contract or anything, we can back out! They can’t make me do this!” Rody whispers loudly.
“Great idea!” Forcas exclaims, apparently eavesdropping on them. “Vince, go draft up a contract for him, like you do for your restaurant!” Vince lets out a deep sigh, pulls a typewriter out of nowhere, and starts to type.
Rody looks at Manon with tears in his french eyes. “This is really happening then, isn’t it?” Manon doesn’t say anything and avoids his gaze. The room is quiet, the only sound is the click of the typewriter’s keys. Rody’s fist tightens around the locket. He starts to exit the kitchen.
“Where are you going? You can’t just leave,” Co-worker calls out to him.
“I’m going to get my guitar,” Rody responds. He walks upstairs to his bedroom. His guitar sits on the floor on top of a pile of papers. He was considering jumping out the window and running as far as he could, but he stops when he sees the papers. Love songs. All for Manon. He picks them up. They were never finished, the papers are covered with notes to himself and things he needs to fix. He never got to play them for her. And he never will, he realizes, if he left her now. Manon would be in debt to the band instead, and she’d be upset with him. She wouldn’t want to hear him sing about how much he loved her after he left her with that band. But she might if he went in her place.
Rody shoves the love songs into his guitar case and slings it over his back. He walks back to the kitchen and stands next to Manon. He smiles at her. She smiles back.
The contract falls out of the typewriter and lands on the table. “It’s done,” Vince says.
“Perfect!” Forcas claps his hands together. He hands a pen and the contract to Rody. “Sign it so we can get this show on the road!”
Rody clicks the pen. He speaks softly, “You really want me to do this?” He asks Manon.
“Yes,” she says. “I do.”
Rody nods once and quickly glances over the contract. Manager position, debt paid off, one year, world tour? He signs his name on the line. Rody Lamoree. Forcas scribbles a signature on it and takes the contract. “Thanks,” he says to Rody. Forcas snaps his fingers. “Let’s get outta here, boys!” The band members shuffle out of the apartment on cue. Forcas turns back to Rody. “Make it quick if you want to say your goodbyes. We’ve got a concert tonight!” Forcas follows after the rest of the band out the door.
Rody grabs the bag from the floor. “Well, see you in a year, I guess.”
Manon shifts her weight. “Yeah. A year.” She fidgets with her hair. “So Rody, I was just thinking, how about we take a break?”
Rody blinks. “What?”
“Only while you’re gone!” Manon explains. “So you don’t have to worry about me all year. We’ll pick up after!”
“But-” Rody tries to protest.
“It’ll be fine! The year will go by fast! You’ll barely even notice you’re without me!”
“Wait, but why? We could write to each other! You could come to the concerts! We can stay together!”
“I think I hear Forcas calling you. You should go. Don’t wanna be late on your first day!”
“Wait, Manon-”
This time Forcas does call for Rody. “Rody, c’mon! We don’t have all day!”
Rody scoops Manon into a hug. “I love you,” he whispers.
She responds by kissing him briefly. “You should go,” she repeats. He pulls her in for another kiss, longer this time. They only break away when Forcas calls again. “I’ll miss you,” she tells Rody.
“I already miss you.” Rody lingers for a moment, admiring her.
“Rody!” Forcas yells, clearly agitated.
“Coming!” He walks to the door. Manon follows him. “Are we really taking a break?” He asks behind him.
“Yes,” she says, her voice clear. They reach the door and Forcas grabs Rody’s arm. “Goodbye, Rody.” Manon shuts the door before he can respond.

The hotel isn’t far from Rody’s apartment, they were able to walk there.
“This hotel sucks,” Co-worker proclaims. “They don’t even have room service!”
“That’s rich coming from the reason we had to switch to this one,” Forcas retorts.
Vince walks to the desk. “Our luggage should already be here, the old hotel shipped it here for us.”
Bakugo kicks at the floor. “The old hotel was way nicer. I can’t believe we traded that for some guy,” he gestures to Rody.
“How long are you going to hold that over my head?” Co-worker snaps.
“Forever.” Bakugo sits in one of the chairs in the lobby. “How long is this going to take?”
“I’m checking us in right now!” Vince yells from the desk.
“Am I supposed to be doing this?” Rody joins Vince. “I skimmed the contract. Also, why do we even need a hotel? We can stay at my apartment.”
“I already booked this place and it has a cancellation fee. Besides, there’s no way we’d ever stay in that hovel,” Vince smirks at him.
Rody tries to protest, but gets cut off by McCoy. “It’s not that big of a deal if I go explore this place! I could find something cool, dude!” He appeals to Forcas.
Forcas shoots him down. “We have to be at the venue in four hours, but we need to start rehearsing soon.”
“Why do we need so much rehearsal time?”
Forcas glaces at the others. “You know why.”
“Fair. But it won’t take long! I’ll be back in a jiff.”
“Don’t go alone. This place is kind of seedy. We can’t lose a member after we just lost all our money.”
“Winnie will go with me, right Winnie?” Winnie, who was reading the floor numbers, looks over.
“Yeah, I’ll do it!” He gives a thumbs up, even though he wasn’t paying attention.
McCoy doesn’t wait for Forcas to answer. He shouts “Thanks!” as he dashes off with Winnie.
“Here are the room keys,” Vince passes the keys to Forcas.
Forcas glares at Co-worker and Bakugo, who are bickering over something stupid. “Why don’t you two go get the luggage?”
“What!” Bakugo shouts. “Why do we have to do it?”
“Yeah! Isn’t that Rody’s job?” Co-worker adds.
Forcas shrugs. “I don’t see any reason why you two can’t do it. Besides, I need Rody so we can discuss his contract and whatever.”
“Uggghhghghghgh” Co-worker whines.
“This is so stupid,” Bakugo mumbles as he and Co-worker shuffle out.
Forcas puts his hands on Rody and Vince’s shoulders and guides them towards the elevator. “Looks like it’s just the three of us.” Vince shakes Forcas off of his shoulder.
The elevator creeks the whole way up. It moves at a snail's pace. At the back corner there’s a suspicious stain with a suspicious odor. Rody shifts his weight as the elevator’s slow climb continues. It’s one of the top eight most awkward elevator rides he’s ever had. He twists the locket in his pocket, feeling the smooth metal against his hand. His hand will smell like metal for a while. He doesn’t mind. He never hated the smell of metal, and it would remind him of Manon.
A wave of guilt hits him. He misses Manon more than anything. If she were here, he thinks, she’d make this elevator ride interesting. She wouldn’t, but Rody doesn’t realize that as he reminisces about her like he didn’t see her an hour ago. A thought flashes in his mind. This is all his fault. Maybe if he noticed that Manon had issues with the mob, he could have helped her pay off the debt. That way he wouldn’t need to work for this band and he and Manon would still be together.
The elevator doors shudder open with a half-hearted ding as they arrive on the second floor. “Room 203,” Forcas mutters to himself as he scans the hall. He struggles to get the key into the lock and twists it around for a bit. Rody steps in and manages to get the door open with an underwhelming click.
“There’s definitely something off about this room,” Rody says as he sets his bags in the corner.
“There isn’t anything in here,” Vince clarifies. He’s right. There’s no furniture. No tables, chairs, or dressers in sight. There isn’t even a bed.
Forcas pops his head in the bathroom. “There’s not even soap. Or towels.” He turns on the sink. “Or water,” he adds when none pours out of the faucet.
“I would suggest that we call the front desk to complain, but we don’t have a phone." Vince leans against a wall and takes out a cigarette.
“Can’t you go smoke on the balcony?” Forcas paces the empty room.
Vince scoffs, but walks to the glass door and slides it open. He looks out for a brief moment before closing it again. “We don’t have a balcony.”
“You’re kidding,” Rody says. But sure enough, the door slides out with no ledge to stand on. This can’t be a design choice, because the neighboring rooms have balconies. “So we don’t have anything.” Rody sticks his head out, looking at the street below.
Forcas pulls him back inside. “Let’s reframe our thinking. We have a roof over our heads, we have a semi-functional bathroom, and we have plenty of space to rehearse. Which is more than we would have if we didn’t have a hotel at all. If we are grateful for what we have, we will surely be satisfied.”
Vince rolls his eyes and lights the cigarette. He sits on the back wall in the corner. Rody sits a few feet away from him. “So, what about my contract?” Rody asks.
Forcas sits down next to Rody. He pulls the contract from his pocket. “There’s just a couple things we need to go over. First, you only have to work for us for a year. But you’re gonna join us for our world tour!”
“World tour?” Rody raises an eyebrow. “Are you guys really that famous?”
“Er, no,” Forcas admits. “But we have faith! We’ll travel all over the world spreading love and kindness with the power of our music!” Forcas gestures in a way that doesn’t match the words he says. “We’ll just need enough money first.”
“We’ll need a miracle,” Vince scoffs.
“Miracles are my specialty.” Forcas tries to wink at Vince, but because of the bandages it looks like a normal blink. “Second, your duties. As our manager, you get to do fun things like managing finances, booking gigs, promoting us, merchandising, sponsorships,” The nervous smile that was plastered on Rody’s face slowly falls as Forcas talks, “scheduling, travel arrangements, communication, negotiations, PR, and supervising! But because of our less than ideal financial situation, you,” Forcas pokes Rody’s shoulder, “get to do even more! You get to be our songwriter, set designer, lighting designer, sound designer, costume designer, choreographer, security, and as a bonus, you can set up the stage for us!”
“Um,” Rody stammers, “I don’t, uh, I don’t think I can do all that.”
“Sure you can!” Forcas pats Rody on the back. “Anybody could! Now, what else is there…” he slides his finger along the words of the contract. “You can’t run away or we’ll sue, obviously, you have to do your job or we’ll sue, makes sense, if you are asked to do any sort of traditional paying job, you won’t receive pay for the work?” Forcas adjusts his glasses. “I don’t remember discussing this. Care to explain why that’s in the contract, Vince?”
Vince breathes out a plume of smoke. “My waiter is likely going to quit. I need a replacement if he does. No one cares about a two-week notice these days.”
“You should have told someone before you put that in.”
“You should have written it yourself if you care that much.”
Forcas rolls his eyes. “I guess you’re a waiter too,” he says to Rody. “That’s pretty much it. You’ll figure it out as you go.
Someone bangs on the door. “Let us in already!” A voice calls from the hallway. Forcas stands up and opens the door. Co-worker and Bakugo are standing in the hallway with all the luggage. “Finally!” Co-worker exclaims as he pulled in as many bags as he could (about three.) “This stuff is heavy, you know.”
“You have given us a key, dammit!” Bakugo shouts as he brings in the rest of the luggage (eleven more bags.)
“It slipped my mind,” Forcas replies as he takes a couple of bags from Co-worker. “Put the bags to the side; we need the room clear for rehearsal.”
Bakugo and Co-worker don’t seem to notice the lack of furniture. “I’m gonna take a piss.” Bakugo heads to the bathroom.
“I’m gonna take a smoke.” Co-worker heads to the smoking corner with Vince.
“Hello?” Someone asks from outside. “Is this the right room?”
“It’s Winnie and McCoy,” a second voice says. Forcas lets them in. “There is nothing in this hotel,” McCoy grumbles. “Not even furniture,” he adds when he sees the room.
“There’s a lost and found, but not furniture.” Winnie sits on one of the suitcases that isn’t his.
“Huge lost and found, bro,” McCoy agrees. “It’s probably bigger than this room.”
“Do you guys remember which suitcase has the speaker in it?” Forcas rummages through a suitcase filled with super boring clothing. Definitely Vince’s.
“I think it’s this one.” Winnie hops off of the suitcase he was sitting on. Sure enough, when he unzips it, the speaker is inside. “Oopsies!”
“It should be fine.” Rody looks it over. “I don’t think anything broke.”
“There’s no soap in the bathroom,” Bakugo says as he walks out. “I used the shampoo instead.”
“Let’s start rehearsing! We can’t kill the first show of the tour if we don’t practice!” Forcas snaps his fingers and everyone stands up. He looks at Bakugo and Co-worker. “Did you two bring up the instruments?”
They exchange glances. “I don’t play an instrument,” Co-worker argues.
“I forgot I played an instrument,” Bakugo reasons.
“Come on, guys.” Forcas hands a key to Rody. “Can you go get the instruments from the lobby? We don’t need them for the beginning anyway.”
Rody gives a thumbs up. “You got it, boss!” When he returns from the lobby, The Side Characterz are in the middle of a dance routine. He sets down the instruments; drums for Bakugo, ukulele for McCoy, cello for Vince, keyboard for Winnie, and a microphone and mic stand for Forcas.
“Since when did you play piano?” McCoy asks Winnie.
“Since you played the ukulele,” Winnie quips.
“Hey Rody,” Forcas calls over the music from the speakers, “Real quick, can you go raid the lost and found for costumes?”
Rody nods, “Sure thing.” When Rody returns, Forcas asks him to get some snacks from the vending machine. “Aye aye, captain!” Rody salutes as he returns to the lobby. He comes back with snacks, and Forcas asks him to get some pillows and blankets for the floor (but not a bed.) “Consider it done.” Every time Rody comes back, he gets sent out again. By the time The Side Characterz finish rehearsing, there isn’t anything left for Rody to do. Rody is grateful for that, because he feels just as tired as the band, and they were dancing for hours.
“Good job today,” Forcas tells the band. “But will it be good enough for the concert? We’ll see right after the break!” Forcas smiles at them. They stare blankly at him. Forcas, annoyed, explains “It means you guys can take a break before we leave.”
Rody remembers the last time someone told him to take a break, this morning. If The Side Characterz are on a world tour, that means he won’t be able to see Manon when they leave France. The thought of that rests like a brick in his stomach. He was hoping that she’d change her mind, that when she realized that he wasn’t too far away, they could be together again. She would want him back. Yet Rody can feel all that slipping away. He’s stuck in a hotel when his apartment is within walking distance. He’s stuck with strangers while Manon is so close. He’s stuck on a world tour while the only place he wants to be is right here. Where she is. He’s stuck without Manon. That’s the worst part of it all.

"When you said concert, I imagined someplace bigger," Co-worker says to Forcas as they walk into the cafe. "This is a gig at best."
The smell of coffee is overpowering. The walls are brick, covered with signs that say things like “wake up, eat, drink coffee, repeat!” and “POP QUIZ: What’s the best way to spend the day? A: Drinking coffee B: Reading a book C: Watching live performances. ANSWER: All of the above!” There were chairs that were as tall as bar stools, except there wasn’t a bar or alcohol. The lights hang from the ceiling, like green lamp shades. A little tree sat in the corner, away from all natural light. The coffee was all overpriced.
“This place is tacky and distasteful,” Vince proclaimed.
“What do you mean, broski? This place is totally gnarly!” McCoy exclaimed.
“It makes me ashamed to have a restaurant.”
"But look!" Winnie runs to the back of the cafe. "They have a cute little stage! It's about the size we rehearsed with too."
"Did you have to switch your performance to this place after you lost the money?" Rody asks.
Forcas shakes his head. "It was always here. The big theaters wouldn't let us perform there because we don't have any fans yet. We have to build an audience."
The barista hands Co-Worker a mug with no coffee in it. "Yo yo, you want some joe?"
"No!" Bakugo grabs the mug and throws it on the ground.
"We're the band," Forcas tells the barista.
"That's lit fam! The stage is in the back. You guys can start whenever."
Rody pulled their equipment to what the barista called the stage. Actually it's a platform of wood about a foot off of the ground. It's a similar size as the hotel room with a sign on the wall that says "keep calm and cafe on." Rody sets the microphone on the stand. "Here are your outfits," Rody says, passing them their outfits. "Sorry I couldn't find much." By outfits he means that he found a leather jacket and sunglasses for Vince and nothing else. "These were the only clothes that would work in the whole room." Rody smiles sheepishly.
Vince holds the jacket and glasses, inspecting them. "I'm not wearing this," he decides.
"Come on, Vince, please? The crowd won't know you're the bad boy if you don't wear this," Rody explains.
Vince stares at him with his eyes. After a while of staring, he gives in. “Fine.” He slips on the jacket and puts the shades on his face. It really does up his bad boyishness.
“Hey extra,” Bakugo moseys on over to Rody, “You should introduce us. Show us what you got.”
“Uh, ok. Is everyone ready?” Everyone is ready. “Great.” Rody smiles a nervous smile and turns to face the cafe’s patrons. He speaks into the microphone. “Hello, customers of The Grind! Who’s ready for a show tonight?” The customers of The Grind! give a few polite cheers. “You’re all about to witness the very first show on the world tour of the next upcoming boy band! They’ve got charm, they’ve got heart, and most importantly, they’ve got love! The charismatic leader, the loveable idiot, the surfer heartthrob, the aloof bad boy, the adorable sweetheart, and… and more! These six boys will change your very life! Now, who's ready for a show!” The customers cheer with enthusiasm. “Introducing, The Side Characterz!” The customers applaud as Rody walks off the stage.
Bakugo stops him on his way. “Not too bad. You underestimated us though. We’re better than life changing; we’re world changing! Right, everyone?”
“Quit talking and get ready to start,” Forcas snaps at him.
“What does he know,” Bakugo mutters.
“Wait, Rody!” Co-worker calls out. “Am I the lovable idiot?”
“Shut up and start dancing!” Forcas yells. He clears his throat and talks into the mic. “Hey girls,” he says, completely changing the tone of his voice. “As you know, we’re The Side Characterz, kicking off our world tour right here, baby. Hope you lovely ladies have a lot of fun tonight. We sure will. We’re opening with our original song, Baby love you babygirl. Five, six, seven, eight!”
The music kicks off with a rather generic sound. The boys are all playing to the best of their ability, which isn’t that good. It doesn’t help that the instruments don’t mesh well. The dance moves are half-hearted at best. Bakugo somehow manages to dance while playing the drums, but it can’t be too hard due to the simplistic rhythm. And Vince looks stupider than Rody anticipated.
The best part of the interesting blend of sounds is Forcas. He wasn’t kidding when he said he was the best singer in the band. He has the voice of an angel. The only thing that could make him sound better would be more eloquent lyrics. Right now, he’s singing: Oh baby, you’re mine, you’re devine, you’re pretty, ooooooh my girl, will you be, my baby, my girl, love you, babygirl love. At the chorus of the song, the rest of the band tries to harmonize with him. To say they failed would be pretty accurate.
In all, it was torturous to listen to. Rody had hope that the rest of their set would be better. It wasn’t. By the time they finished, the only people who hadn’t left were asleep, which is the opposite goal of a cafe. “Woah, girls, wasn’t that fire?” Forcas shouts to the cafe. No one responds. “...Well, that’s us done! You’ve all been a wonderful crowd, thanks so much for enjoying our show!”
The Side Characterz all high five each for having a successful show. The band is so shit it’s not even funny. Rody can’t believe they’re celebrating. He drops to his knees in shock and shouts "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" The band doesn't notice his temper tantrum, as they are too busy celebrating. Vince glances over at Rody, opening his mouth to speak. Before he gets the chance, Co-worker chest bumps him a bit too hard and he falls over. The band doesn't notice this either, and Bakugo steps on his arm. Rody looks into the remaining crowd, noticing… Manon?? Hoping she came to save him, having regretted her decision, he hurries offstage to find her. He walks through the nonexistent crowd. The world disappears. Manon is the only thing that matters.
“Manon!!!” He cries as he approaches her. “I’m so glad you’re here! I’ve missed you so much!”
“Yeah I bet,” she says. “That was some concert. Very interesting.”
Rody cringes. “They suck ass, Manon! They spent like five bajillion years rehearsing and they still sound like shit! And they made me run around and do stuff the whole time! I didn’t get to hear them practice! I’m sorry, I had no idea they were this bad!”
Manon laughs. “It’s alright. I mean, you’ll have time to make them better.”
Rody’s face falls. She wasn’t here to save him after all. His day had been pretty miserable. He imagines what it would be like to spend a whole like this. Always running around, always busy, doing things for a band that would probably break up by the end of the year. What would happen then? Would they have custody battles for him? Or would they send him back to live in debt again?
Would that even be so bad? Sure, being in debt to the mob isn’t good. But at least he still had Manon. He studies her, trying to remember every single thing about her. One day, he’ll have to leave France, and Manon, behind. He won’t see her for so long. It feels unbearable. He doesn’t want to leave her. He can’t. Not again.
“Don’t let me go, Manon.” His voice is soft, gentle. His eyes glisten with tears. “Don’t let me go,” he repeats. “I can’t live a life without you. Let me stay with you. You’re all I need. Manon,” he grabs her hands, “you’re everything.”
Manon is silent. She looks down at her hands, cradled by Rody’s. She squeezes his hands. “It’s only a year, Rody.” She tries to keep her tone light, but her voice wavers as she speaks. “We’ll see each other after.”
“I can still come back. We don’t have to do this.”
“We need the money. I can’t go back to debt. I can’t do it.”
“Please,” he begs. “I can’t be without you.”
She looks him in the eyes. “You have to,” her voice has more force behind it. “If—” she hesitates. “If you loved me you would leave.”
The brick in Rody’s stomach gains a hundred pounds. “Of course I love you,” he says, desperate. “I’ve always loved you. And I always will. All I can do is love you.”
“Then you have to do this for me.” She gives him a small, sad smile. “This is what I want, Rody. I need this.”
“I need you.”
Manon is silent. Her eyes are still locked on Rody’s. Her hands are still holding his. She is still here. She is with him. She's his. She knows him. And he knows her. He knows her, and he knows himself, well enough to know this is a fight he isn’t going to win. He’ll go back. The way she wants it. She’ll be gone. But now she is here and he can’t let go. He holds onto the feeling as long as he can. He holds it and lives it as long as he can.
She slips her hands away. The spell of normalcy she cast dissipates. “If you can’t go,” she says, “I will.” She collects her things. Rody watches her, unmoving, arms still out, hands holding where she used to be. “Goodbye, Rody,” is the last thing he hears.
He is stuck. Alone. He doesn’t know how long it’s been. He doesn’t know when he started to cry. He doesn’t know when the band stopped celebrating, when they found him, how long they stood with him. He realizes how much he doesn’t know when he finds himself walking back to the hotel, surrounded by the band. Someone is guiding him, a gentle force on his back. It’s loud. They are talking and cheering. They make jokes to each other. They laugh. They smile.
“Thank you,” Rody whispers to the person behind him. He can’t even hear himself over all the noise.
As Rody walks along, a thought creeps into his head. What if she forgets about me? He dismisses it, silly thought, she wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t forget about him. She wouldn’t. But it sticks in his brain, a fear nibbling away at the back of his mind. That’s when another thought comes to him. What if I forget about her? This one he does dismiss. What kind of question is that? Obviously he’s not gonna forget her.
Rody blinks, realising they've made it to the hotel, entering the hotel room. He looks up at the band, still laughing and chatting, except for Vince, whose chest still hurts. Rody decides something then and there. He’s doing this for Manon. If she believes in him, he can do anything. He can help save her from debt. “Guys, listen up!” He announced.
The band looks over at him, confused. “What's up, man?” McCoy asks.
Rody's determined, looking over all the members. “We are gonna do our best to make this band famous!” The band shouts in agreement. “All over the world!” The band shouts louder. “We're gonna have great performances!" The band shouts even louder. “Even though tonight's show sucked!”
“Hey, wait!” Co-worker protests.
Rody ignores him. “I'm gonna make sure that this band is perfect!” The band shouts so loud they commit many noise violations. Rody’s orbs shimmer with determination. He holds the locket Manon gave him, shining somehow even in the dark lighting. From now on, Rody tells himself, he’s gonna try his hardest to make this band work. For The Side Characterz. For Manon. And maybe, even for himself.

Chapter Text

“Cheers to a successful first show!” Winnie exclaims. Glasses clinked together as The Side Characterz cheered. Still riding their enthusiasm from last night's concert, they decided to go out for breakfast. They’re eating at a cute little cafe, one that has normal people as customers. The band is pretty out of place there.
“Can you believe The Grind! kicked us out?” Bakugo shovels his spicy curry in his mouth. “We give them a great show and this is how they repay us?”
McCoy spreads vegemite on his toast. “They said something about their reputation, brah.”
“We’re too good for them, that’s why.” Co-worker takes another bite of his escargot (he insisted on having “fancy french food”.) “They’re afraid we’ll be too famous! After that incredible show, they’re sacred.”
“Yeah, that’s why,” Rody muttered. The band didn’t order anything for him, so he had to get a burger he found on the street.
Forcas slams down his ice cream like it's a can of beer. “I have a confession to make. I used to think we sounded bad.” The band gasps, hurt and betrayed. “It’s true. But now, I see things differently. We killed it last night!” The band cheers, relief that their charismatic leader believes in them.
“The same thing happened to me!” McCoy exclaims. “I thought we sounded gnarly before, but now, I know the truth. We killed it so radically, it was a premeditated murder, yo!” The band cheers louder.
Forcas speaks over the commotion. “We’ll be even better next time. We gotta get better. Obviously there’s nothing better than perfection, but we will get better anyway. Then, we can play real shows, on actual stages!” The Side Characterz go crazy and cheer.
Rody, capitalizing off of their excitement, exclaims “And that means we need to practice!” The Side Characterz stop cheering and look at Rody like he shot them.
“Do we really have to?” Co-worker shudders as he eats another snail. “We can just go up to real stages and ask, yeah?”
“No, Rody’s right,” Winnie says. “We need to practice if we want to be a successful band. This stuff doesn’t just happen overnight.”
Co-worker hits the Rock Eyebrow. “It can. I’ll just call my dad. He’ll get it worked out.” He pulls out his phone and calls. “Hey Lucille. It’s Clayton. I need to talk to the old man.” Co-worker gives them a big thumbs up. “Uh huh. Yeah. Wait, what?” He frowns. “You’re kidding. No. C’mon, man!” Co-worker gives them a big thumbs down. “Tell him he sucks and I hope he dies tomorrow. What? Well, don’t bite my head off!” He hangs up. “My dad cut me off for losing the money! It was only one million! This isn’t fair! Stupid old asshole!” He spews out more insults and kicks a trash can. He yelps in pain, the trash can was too mighty for his poor foot.
“He’s just throwing another tantrum,” Forcas whispers to Rody. “He’ll be over it soon.”
After a few more minutes of yelling, Co-worker regains his composure and turns to the band. “Guess it's time to break up. We clearly won’t get anywhere without connections. I’m heading home.” He calls for his dad again. After another, longer argument, he kicks the trash can again. “Apparently, I’m cut off from everything. Including the private jet! This stinks.”
“This just proves my point!” Rody interjects. “We can’t rely on nepotism to get to the top. We have to do it the hard way! Who’s with me!”
The Side Characterz look at each other. Winnie speaks for them. “Totally! We can’t quit; we just got started! We can only go up from here! Right, guys?” Most of them murmur in agreement. Vince doesn’t say anything, he grabs another packet of lemon juice from the table and downs it like a shot.
“Earth to Vince!” Forcas shouts, waving a hand in front of Vince’s face. Vince looks up. “We’re having a moment here.”
“Yeah, man,” McCoy agrees. “You’re, like, totally harshing our vibe.”
Vince grabs the lemon off of his water. “I don’t care.”
“Just say you’re in so we can get on with it,” Forcas tells him.
“Sure. I’m in. Whatever.” Vince bites the lemon. The Side Characterz cheer and go crazy mode. Bakugo goes a little too crazy mode and somehow destroys the table, creating a small fire and getting them kicked out. Rody adds the cafe to the growing list of places they’re banned from.
They arrive back at the hotel, hyped as ever. “Alright, show me your very best. Don’t hold back!” Rody tells the band. All the equipment is set. The band stands ready. Rody holds a notepad and pen. “I’ll take notes so we can see what you need to improve on.”
“Ready, boys?” Forcas asks. The band nods, confidence exuding off of them. “Let’s do it!” Forcas counts them off. “One, two. One, two, three, four!” The song is worse than Rody expected. The confidence they gained from their last performance seems to hinder how well they do, like they aren’t trying anymore. Everything that went wrong last night goes wrong again, but more intensely. Rody fights to keep his expression neutral. After what feels like forever, the band finishes.
“Well?” Winnie asks, smiling and out of breath. “How did we do?”
“Better than anything you’ve heard before, obviously.” Bakugo runs his hand through his hand casually. “All due to the drumming. None of you extras could match my level!”
Rody glances at his paper. He’s silent for a bit, trying to figure out a way to phrase it. “It wasn’t completely awful,” He lands on. The Side Characterz glance at each other, wondering whether to be offended or upset. The ones who decided to be upset looked like they were going to take it out on Rody. “Forcas was good at singing!” Rody blurts, trying to control the situation.
“What, and the rest of us weren’t?” Co-worker accuses Rody.
“Um,” Rody scratches the back of his neck, “there’s definitely room for improvement. Like, y’know, with the lyrics. Who wrote that song?”
“You mean Baby love you babygirl? Everyone but Vince,” Winnie explains. “It was the first song we wrote for the band. That might have been before Vince joined. Or maybe he just didn’t want to help. I don’t remember very well.”
“Then we can write another song. Preferably one with more diverse lyrics.”
“What do we need a new song for?” McCoy questions. “It’s already perfect, dude.”
“I was just thinking long term,” Rody clarifies, even though he hates Baby love you babygirl. “We’ll need new songs at some point anyway, so we might as well start writing now.” He bites back the urge to insult the old song’s lack of creativity. “Do you guys know how to read sheet music?” All of them shake their heads, except for Vince, who has returned to his spot in the corner. “That’s alright. Neither did The Beatles, and they were the first boy band.”
Rody tries to remember everything he knows about music. “Can everyone meet me here at C?” He sings a C note. The Side Characterz, excluding Forcas, all hit a note that isn't C. They sound terrible together. Rody makes a face and keeps singing C. “That’s not C. Try meeting me at C.” All of them adjust their pitch. None of them hit C and they sound even worse. “Stop,” Rody says. “Forcas, why did you change your note? You got it right the first time.”
Forcas shrugs. “You told us to switch notes.”
Rody sighs and shakes his head. “Let's try something new, some vocal warmups?” Rody clears his throat and recalls the one semester of choir he took in middle school. He sings, “Mommy made me mash my m&ms”
The Side Characterz repeat him, “Mommy made me mash my m&ms”
“Higher!” Rody shouts. “Mommy made me mash my m&ms”
“Mommy made me mash my m&ms” The Side Characterz sound worse.
“Mommy made me mash my m&ms” Rody goes even higher.
“Mommy made me mash my m&ms” Bakugo and Vince have to drop out, the note is too high for them, though the average person would have no trouble with it.
“Mommy made me mash my m&ms” Rody continues, getting progressively higher.
“Mommy made me mash my m&ms” The Characterz drop, one by one, until the only one left singing is Winnie. Winnie keeps singing even after Rody can't hit the notes. He's off key, but very high pitched.
Rody keeps throwing warmups at them, testing their singing abilities. He gets complex, teaching them harmonies and even has them practice with real boy band songs. They finally end up at a point where they sound half decent, like a high school band who thinks they sound really good and play at mediocre parties. Rody gets them singing a bunch of classic boy band songs so he can write a new song for them.
As the band is just starting their third round of Any Kind of Guy You Want by Big Time Rush, Rody finishes the song. “Gather round everyone,” he announces. “Your new song is ready.” The band sits in a semi-circle around Rody. “It's called I'm yours.”
The Side Characterz are silent for a beat. “That's it?” Co-worker asks.
“Yeah.” Rody clears his throat, speak singing through the song. “Oh girl, I know what you've done. Oh girl, I love what you do. Tell me, tell me. Am I loving you right? Tell me, tell me. Do you love me tonight? Leave me behind tomorrow and I'll wait right here. You know I'll never leave you, I am always near. I'm yours, my girl, I'm yours, yours, your boy. Use me all you want, babe, that's what I'm here for. I'm yours, I'm yours, I'm yours.” Rody speaks normally. “That's the basics of it, you'll pick it up.”
Winnie frowns. “That's not a fun boy band song. That's kind of sad.”
“Not all boy band songs are fun, Winnie.” McCoy tells him.
Forcas puts a hand lightly on Rody’s shoulder and whispers in his ear. “You ok man? That wasn't about Manon or anything, right?”
“No!” Rody shouts. “A guy can write a song about love that isn't about his love life if he wants to. And it wasn't even serious! I don't get what we're all upset about!”
Forcas holds his hands up. “You're the only one upset. We like the song. Right, guys?” He looks back to the band for reassurance. Most of them nod.
“This song is too complicated! How do you expect me to play it and dance at the same time!” Bakugo snaps at Rody.
“We’ll just record it. That’s what real boy bands do.” Rody states, grateful the conversation switched.
“Are you saying we aren’t a real boy band?” Bakugo shouts. “We’ve been a real boy band longer than you’ve been alive! The audience is gonna think we’re phonies, idiot!”
“You’ll still be singing and dancing live, only the music will be pre recorded. And you’re going to play the music for the track anyway. The only question is how will we record it?”
“I’ve got this one,” Co-worker says. He opens his bag and pulls out a full, recording studio quality microphone. Everyone’s jaw drops open. “That’s right,” Co-worker smirks, “I’m not completely irresponsible with money. I did use some to buy things that benefit the band.” A polite applause rises through the room. “Thank you, thank you. But wait, there’s more!” He pulls out a desktop computer, a desk, a soundboard, pairs of headphones, and sound proofing.
“Wow Co-worker,” Rody says, looking over the supplies. “This is exactly what we need. How’d you do it?”
“Googled it,” He replies. The band and Rody get to work setting up the hotel bathroom into a small recording studio after discovering that the shower had sweet acoustics.
Rody sets himself up at the computer, wearing a pair of headphones. “Ready?”
Winnie is haphazardly standing in the shower with a pair of headphones and his keyboard. “Ready!” Rody hits record. Winnie places his fingers on the keys, but doesn’t play anything. “What am I supposed to play?”
Rody stops the recording. “The new song?”
“I don’t know what it sounds like,” Winnie clarifies. “You didn’t tell us that part.”
Rody grumbles like it wasn’t his fault. He takes his headphones off and walks over to Winnie. “Play this: Da da-da da da da,” He sings the melody of the song.
“Like this?” Winnie plunks out a tune.
“No, it's da da-da da da da. You’re playing da da-da don da da.”
“Ohhhhh. I get it.” Winnie plays another tune.
“You’re still doing it wrong,” Rody says, hints of exasperation in his voice. “It’s not da da da-da da da. You’re too fast.”
“Sorry. It’s kind of hard without the drums.” Rody doesn’t tell Winnie that he didn’t play on tempo even when the drums were there. “Maybe Bakugo should have gone first.”
Rody doesn’t like the fact that he’s right. “It’s fine, you’re already set up, and it’s too difficult to take the keyboard out of the shower again.”
“I guess so…”
“Now, let’s try it again.” Rody keeps running Winnie until he gets it right. The other instrument playing members receive the same treatment. Rody figures out how to use the free mixing software he downloaded and puts the track together. He blends and layers and mixes and does all the complicated stuff real producers do. It turns out pretty decent in his opinion.
“Now all we need are some dance moves!” Rody places the band into a V formation, like they're six migrating geese. Forcas and Co-worker stand at the tip of the V, McCoy and Vince in the middle, and Bakugo and Winnie at the ends. Rody stands in front with his back to them, in position to teach the choreography he was making up on the fly.
“Start with a step to your left, like this.” He steps to his left. “Oh wait, if you’re on the right side, you should step to your right.” He steps to his right, putting him right back where he was before. “So if I say go to the left and you’re on the right, you should go to the right instead. Understand?” The people on the right, Co-Worker, Vince, and Winnie, step to their right.
“Ok, so then, outside hand up on I know what you’ve done,” Rody continues. “And kick!” The band hesitantly copies him. “When you sing leave me behind tomorrow, turn, step, spin, and slide!” Rody starts to really enjoy choreographing. “The chorus is complicated, so watch carefully. Two pivot turns, plié, bend, snap, whip, nae nae, and arabesque!”
The Side Characterz try their best to follow what Rody does. Winnie and Vince attempt to mirror the moves. Co-worker gives up and copies what Rody does, if Rody were worse at dancing. Rody hums the song, vaguely telling what they do when. Bakugo picks up the moves effortlessly. Co-worker trips over his expensive shoes and falls onto Forcas, knocking them both over.
“Ok enough!” Rody calls out. “Good hustle guys. Take five, you earned it.” The band breaks apart to go sit in corners or whatever in the empty room. Rody pulls out the water bottle he snuck in from the cafe. He called five for himself, after all that dancing he'd tired himself out. Water hits his lips when he hears Bakugo's voice.
“Where'd you get that?” Bakugo asks. Sweat sticks to his skin.
“I brought it myself,” Rody replies. “Did you want some?” Bakugo grabs the water from Rody’s hand and chugs the rest. “Geez, you’re thirsty. The dance wasn’t that hard, right?”
Bakugo crunches the empty bottle in his hand. “Not for me.” He leans against the wall. “Dancing isn’t hard. It’s like drumming. Keeping the rhythm. Just with movement instead of drumsticks.”
Rody nods. “So the others shouldn’t be bad at it then.”
“You’d think. What kind of boy band can’t keep a beat? Only the world’s worst boy band, The Side Characterz!” Bakugo snickers. “Such a stupid name.”
“I thought you liked the band? Didn’t you think the concert went well?”
Bakugo slides down the wall and sits on the floor. “You kidding? I’m not deaf. It was terrible. I’m not surprised the audience fell asleep. I was good, but everyone else sounded ass. Maybe Forcas was alright. I was better.”
Rody sits next to him. “Do you think tomorrow’s show will go better?”
“Probably not. The rest of them think they’re all that, but they’ll just make fools out of themselves again. Someone needs to tell ‘em they suck. I would, but they don’t listen to me. They’d think I was just lashing out at them, like usual.”
“Should I tell them?”
“If you want. It's whatever. I don’t actually care.” Bakugo shoots a sly grin at Rody. “The audience can tell who really has talent anyways.”
It was true, Bakugo was pretty good. He could tell his way around a drum set. That, and he was good at dancing. It made Rody’s job easier, and Rody appreciated him for it. “We have to run the dance again.” Rody stands and picks up the crushed water bottle. “They’ll never be good without practice.”
“They’ll never be good with practice,” Bakugo quips.
For the rest of the day, Rody runs the dance, the song, the singing. He doesn’t worry about the rest of the set. If he could get even one song to go well, it would be the greatest thing he’d ever done. Hours ticked by, but Rody didn’t notice. The only things he noticed were minor imperfections he had to correct. Forcas had to tell Rody to stop so they could get some sleep. The band sighed in relief as they laid on the floor, off their feet at last.
Rody thought that they were in a good spot, but the next morning, it was clear he was mistaken. “Run it on your own this time,” he said with confidence. “Show me what you remember!” He clicked his pen, ready to take more notes. Rody assumed that things would go as well as they had last night. He hoped The Side Characterz would have at least remembered the words to the song. But his hope dwindled seeing them bluff their way through the song. The moves were all wrong, they were off beat, and were singing anything but the right note.
Rody watches in horror. He wonders where it all went wrong. The only logical conclusion is that the band was never good, and his eyes and ears tricked him. His pen frantically writes every problem he can see. The paper is full before the halfway point. He thinks about wrecking the entire room, but they’d probably just add the expenses onto his debt, so he doesn’t. But he does rip up a sheet of paper in defiance. Take that, Side Characterz!
The band is out of breath by the end of the song. “Pretty… sick… right?” McCoy pants.
Rody can’t take it anymore. He put up with them being horrible yesterday. He tried to be patient. He tried to be kind. But perhaps he enabled them. Maybe they thought playing this terribly was good. It’s clear to Rody that it’s time for a new strategy. Bakugo’s advice from paragraphs ago fills his mind. Someone needs to tell ‘em they suck.
“Not sick, McCoy!” Rody snaps. “I can’t believe you all still think you're good at this! News flash: You aren’t! You weren’t good last night, and you're not any better tonight!” The Side Characterz seem confused. It hasn’t clicked yet that Rody genuinely thinks they’re bad. “Do you want the audience to leave? Because if that’s the goal, you’re all doing so well! You’d be the Grammy winners of bands that make the audience walk out! I’ve tried to make you better, but you never learn!”
The band members move closer to each other, away from Rody. Vince and Bakugo stay in their places, unaffected by Rody’s yelling. Rody doesn’t think the message is going through. He calls people out individually, pointing at them as he does. “Forcas, you can’t stand there singing the whole time! It doesn’t matter how good you are, you have to dance with the others! Everyone has to dance!” Forcas doesn’t say anything. He looks straight forward.
“Winnie,” Rody continues, “You don’t know the words to the song! It isn’t long! Your voice isn’t that bad, you have to use it correctly!” Winnie grabs a fistful of his jacket and stares at the floor, hiding his eyes.
“McCoy, you know the words, but you’re so off-key that it hurts to listen to! There’s a reason we did all those vocal warmups. But I guess you don’t care enough to sing properly!” McCoy’s face turns red. He fidgets with his necklace.
“Vince, why won’t you smile? No one wants to watch a boyband where one of the members looks like he’s going to kill the audience the whole song!”
Vince speaks, eyes locked on Rody. “I don’t have to smile.”
Vince’s words only serve to fire Rody up even more. “Yes you do! Everyone has to smile! It looks off when you don’t smile! You’re a part of the band, you need to do what everyone else does!”
“You can’t make me smile,” Vince says, his posture perfect, his gaze piercing. “No one can.”
Rody falters for a moment, intimidated. “I know you can smile, Vince, I’ve seen you smile before!”
“No you haven’t,” Vince gaslights.
Damn. Vince was right. Rody doesn’t remember if he’s seen Vince smile. Maybe sarcastically, but a smile like that wouldn’t work for the stage anyway. “Whatever.” Rody decides that it isn’t worth an argument. He has a bigger point to make anyway. “Co-worker,” Rody spins on his heel towards Co-worker. “What are you good at?”
Co-worker, prepared to be yelled at, hesitates. “Um…” He mumbles, thrown off by the question. “I’m good at plenty of things. Like making money and working a 9 to 5.”
“So, you’re only good at your office job. That explains why you were the worst one out there!” Rody, as anticipated, yells at Co-worker. “You can’t dance, you can’t sing, you keep making stupid faces that throw off the whole performance! You’re standing in the front, you have to make sure that you look good! You’re the one everybody will be looking at! Take this seriously!” Co-worker mutters something derogatory under his breath. “I heard that!” Rody didn’t really hear what Co-worker said, but he was trying to seem powerful. “Just for that, you’re swapping places with Bakugo!”
“In the back? No one’s gonna see me!” Co-worker complains.
“Bakugo is a better dancer than you, it only makes sense.” Co-worker goes back to grumbling. Bakugo gives Rody a smug smile, prompting him to yell further.
Rody addresses the group. “We’re running it all again, from the top! I want to see improvement out there, boys! Don’t forget what I told you!” Rody ran the song again and again, never satisfied. He’d change some moves, some harmonies, and he’d yell when it inevitably wasn’t perfect. After a few hours, the band finishes another failed run of the song. Rody glances at the time. The concert will be soon. They’re nowhere near ready. Rody makes one last attempt to get them to understand, to get them to get it right. He calls the band to him, as he normally does for notes.
“I’m very disappointed,” Rody’s tone is low, dangerous. The Side Characterz look to one another. This isn’t a normal notes session. It’s something worse. “I thought that you all could do better than this. I thought if I tried hard enough, you would be able to perform one song. That’s it. That is all I’m trying to do, all I’ve been trying to do, all day. And yet, somehow, you still are incapable of putting on a show that audiences will like!” Rody delves into it, his voice rising with his anger. “Never in my three days of directing have I seen such poor work! I get it, you’re tired. Well, so am I. We wouldn’t have to keep running this, we wouldn’t still be at it if you could all just get your shit together!” He throws his clipboard to the ground. “We’re forgetting the words, the dance moves, everything I tried to teach you! This isn’t my fault, at this point, the only people to blame for the low quality slop you intend to feed to your audience, is yourself!” His voice booms through the hotel room. The Side Characterz try to avoid looking at him, they fidget with nearby objects, shifting their weight and hiding their faces.
Rody continues, his voice dropping. With the volume decreased, the only things left in Rody’s voice are the touches of anger, the hints of frustration, the overwhelming tiredness. “I don’t know what you all plan to do tonight. The concert is near, but it won’t be good. It won’t be good enough for people to stay. You’ll bomb it, just like you did last time.”
The band has mixed reactions. Some of them are hurt, trying to make themselves as small as possible, to disappear and avoid his speech. Others are not afraid to stare Rody down, to look at him on his level. Most are everywhere in between. Rody is feared by some, but disrespected by all. He says what’s left of his speech.
“There’s other songs in your set. There are many you pick from. But you all know this is the only song people will care about, it’s the only one they’ll remember. Without giving it your all in this rehearsal, we don’t have this song. Without this song, we don’t have a show.”
The band stands, watching Rody, waiting for the next thing he says. Rody doesn’t notice how tired they are, how upset, he doesn’t look at them long enough to notice. “Take five, or fifty, or forever. It doesn’t matter if the band never comes back, it never even started!” Rody walks to the bathroom, ignoring the stares on his back from the band.
Rody decides that he only has one option left to make this work. And it's gonna take the help of the Pros. Yeah, you know who. Rody grabs the half-full bottle of shampoo in the hotel bathroom and squeezes out the bottle into a circle, before kneeling in front of it and closing his eyes. He shouts, “Big Time Rush! Big Time Rush! Big Time Rush!” Logan, James, Carlos, and Kendall all appear in front of him inside the circle.
Logan steps forward. “It's me, Logan, from hit boy band Big Time Rush! What's up, man?”
Rody looks up at him. “I need you guys to help with my boy band.”
Kendall grins. “Boy bands are our specialty!” He raises his finger. “But first, Big Time Question: How the Rush did you summon us?? We're still alive!”
“That's not important right now. I'm managing a boy band and they suck BIG TIME!!!”
James sighs, “No, no, only we get to make Big Time jokes. But we'll help you. What about them do you need help with? Singing? Dancing?” He does the sparkle hand thing*, “Slang?”
The Big Time Rush members all high five each other because of how hip they are. The word “slang” sends Rody into cardiac arrest. He quickly recovers. “They all lowkey suck! I've been trying to help them get the new song down, but they still don’t even know the lyrics!”
Carlos interjects. “My Big Time Senses tell me you might be going too hard on them.”
Rody furrows his eyebrows. “What??”
“Yeah, dude. How recently did they learn the song?”
Rody thinks. “Uhhhh… yesterday? But we spent all day yesterday and today working.”
Logan's jaw drops scarily low. “Bro, you're overworking them Big Time! They just started learning the song. You're being Big Time harsh on them and it's killing their Rush!”
Rody begins to question himself, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. He thinks back on it, the band's big, sad orbs. The way they walked. When they were talking about him behind his back, they were saying good things, right? “Am I? I mean, we haven't taken many breaks, was I really overworking them? I guess they did look kind of tired.”
Kendall sighs. “You need to go out there and apologize for being a Big Time butthead, and be more patient with them. They'll never get better if they're discouraged.”
“Yeah!” James nods. “When we first started out, we were terrible! And our manager, Gustavo, hated us. He yelled at us a lot.” The Big Time boys nod solemnly. “He yelled at us because we weren’t good enough, but his yelling only upset us. It didn’t help us learn anything.”
Carlos speaks up. “But he eventually realized that if he stopped yelling and really tried to teach us, we would Big Time shine, and now, we chill.”
Rody looks embarrassed. “Huh. Okay. I'm sorry, I guess I gotta up my game and be cool!”
“Yeah!!!” The band cheers.
“Okay! Bye guys!”
The Big Time Rush members all hold hands, closing their eyes. “BIG TIME GOODBYE!!!!!” They poof and disappear.
Rody walks out of the bathroom. “Band meeting!” He calls out. The Side Characterz grimace.
“He hogs the bathroom and doesn’t even let us use it,” Co-worker grumbles.
“Just to Elevate it a little more,” Rody reassures. “You guys have been working really hard, haven’t you?” The band nods. “I’ve been asking a lot of you. We’ve been running the song 24/Seven. I just want to succeed. But I shouldn’t have gotten so fired up about it. I had No Idea what it would be like for you. I wasn’t thinking of what it was like for you. When you’re performing, Nothing Even Matters. I shouldn’t have Paralyzed you with work. I’m sorry.”
The band huddles together and whispers, eyeing Rody. After momentary discussion, they break apart. “We get it,” Forcas says. “We want the band to succeed too. But we shouldn’t get caught up in being perfect. Sometimes, it's better to just see where the song takes you. But you’re right, we should take the song more seriously. We have been goofing off quite a bit. We’re sorry too.” The Side Characterz murmur in agreement.
Rody smiles. “I’ve decided there are some changes we should make.” The band cautiously looks at him. Was he lying during his apology? “Forcas, it’s alright if your dancing isn’t the exact same as the others. As long as you still hit the right moves at the right time, don’t be afraid to put some personality into it. That goes for everyone else as well. Tonight is a Big Night.” Forcas is relieved. He didn’t yell after all.
“Winnie, you picked up the words, and McCoy, you picked up the notes. You two have improved a lot. You should be proud! I can Count on You two.” Winnie and McCoy are for sure proud. They beam, confidence restored.
“And Vince,” Rody continues. “You don’t have to smile. I made a big deal out of it before, but it kinda works. You are the bad boy after all, of course you wouldn’t smile. I Know You Know what’s best.” Vince nods once, showing his satisfaction with what Rody said.
Co-worker pipes up, “Does this mean that me and Bakugo are gonna switch places again? I get to go back to the front?”
“Actually,” Rody rubs the back of his neck, “you’re only Halfway There. Dancing wise. It works better with Bakugo in the front.”
“Obviously,” Bakugo smirks.
“Should we run it one last time? Maybe run the other songs as well?” Rody suggests.
“I don’t know if we have enough time,” Forcas says. He grabs Co-worker’s wrist and checks his watch. His only visible eye goes wide. “We have to leave, the show starts in half an hour!” The band scrambles around the apartment, gathering everything they need for the concert.
They run all the way to the venue, another cafe called Cappuccin-ok. As expected, everything there is just ok. There isn’t anything notable about the food, drinks, or decor. It makes The Grind! look luxurious.
“Ready to make this place better than ok?” Rody hypes the band up.
“Or we’ll keep it the same amount of ok,” Bakugo retorts.
“That’s good too.” Rody keeps his mood positive. “ Tonight, The City is Ours! Give them your all, and then the next concert, we do it All Over Again until we go Worldwide! You’ve got this!”
“Oh Yeah!” The Side Characterz cheer and run on stage. As they start their set, Rody notices that the audience likes the band more than the last one did. Maybe the audience has bad taste, but it looks like The Side Characterz have improved. They did learn something after all. Rody smiles. It’ll be a while before The Side Characterz will be good enough to get big. However, Rody knows that they’ll be able to get there. If Rody can lighten up, he knows that they’ll be more famous than Big Time Rush. He just needs to see where the year takes him.

Chapter Text

Rody can't breathe. One second ago, he was peacefully on the hotel floor, sleeping. And now, he's suffocating.
“AAARRRGHHHH!!!!” The sound is muffled by something covering his head. He claws at his face, pulling off the Thing and looking at it. It’s…. a waiter’s uniform? Rody thinks back. He was a waiter before. That didn't go so well. Rody shudders. He lowers the uniform, to see Vince squatting over him, his face like 3 inches away. Rody screams again. “AAAGGHHHHJH!!!!”
Vince blinks. “I just got a call this morning. My waiter quit.”
“So???”
“You have to be my new waiter.”
Rody sits up. “What.”
Vince stands. “Chop chop. We open in an hour.”
“Wait, wait, wait, you can't make me do this. I’m not your slave, I'm a band manager!”
Vince steps on Co-worker’s hair. Co-worker wakes up with a yelp. “Hey, watch it!”
Vince does not lift his foot up. “Give me Rody’s contract.” Co-worker grumbles, pulling out the contract from under his silk pillowcase. He had naively assumed there would be pillows at the hotel, but alas. Vince unfurls the contract and it rolls 8.47 feet on the floor. He points to a small section closer to the bottom. “See?”
“I can’t even read that!” Rody complains. “That could just be nothing!”
Vince sighs, annoyed. “It clearly says you have to be my waiter.”
“Uh, nuh uh!” Rody snaps.
“Let me handle this,” Forcas interrupts, having awoken from his slumber. He rummages in his coat (he slept in it.) “Behold!” He holds a comically large magnifying glass. “I believe this should be useful to you.”
Vince grabs it and holds it up to the contract. “It’s right there.”
Rody squints. Sure enough, there it is. “‘If there is an occasion in which one Mister Vincent Charbonneau requires assistance, then you shall have to comply.’ Hey, what the fag is this!?!”
Forcas shakes his head disapprovingly. “I thought we said not to put the slavery clause in! Tsk, tsk, tsk.”
Vince doesn’t care and pushes Rody into the bathroom to change. Rody begrudgingly puts the uniform on. It fits him well. Too well. Did Vince tailor the suit for him? “Nah what da hell!” Rody exclaims. He walks out without tying his tie.
Vince notices and stops him. “Why didn't you tie your tie?”
Rody smiles sheepishly. “Uhhh, ‘cause I didn’t wanna?”
Vince narrows his eyes. “Tie it.”
Rody fiddles with the tie, wrapping it into a knot. He laughs nervously and tries to undo the knot. He makes it worse and gets his thumb tangled in it. McCoy speaks right when Rody starts to lose feeling in his thumb. “Do you seriously not know how to tie a bow tie?” He says from the floor.
“Ugh, I’ll handle it.” Vince yanks at the knot, grumbling as he unties it. Rody tries not to breathe on him. Eventually, Rody’s hand falls free, brushing against Vince's hand on the way down. Vince pulls the tie into a neat bow. “Don’t let this come undone. I’m not going to tie it for you again.”
“You sure you want him as your waiter?” Bakugo elbows Vince. “What makes you think he’ll even be able to carry a plate?”
Vince glares at Bakugo. “We’re leaving now.” Vince heads out the door. The band members all say some sort of goodbye, except for Winnie, who slept through the whole thing. Rody considers waking him for attention, but decides against it when Vince yells at him from the hallway. He is NOT respecting the hotel's quiet hours.
It’s a cold morning for late spring. The sun peeks out over the horizon. There aren’t many people out this early, Vince and Rody are alone. It’s hard for Rody to recognize where they are in the dim light. He thinks it looks familiar, but he isn’t sure.
Vince is a fast walker. Rody walks behind him, keeping up with his pace. He has no idea which restaurant is Vince’s, let alone where it is. Vince navigates confidently, guiding Rody through the city. He hasn’t said a word since they left the hotel. Rody does not appreciate the silence. It’s weird.
“So, uh,” Rody says, trying to break the ice, “What kind of food do you serve at your restaurant?”
“I don’t expect you to be familiar with what we serve.” Vince doesn’t look behind him as he talks. “My restaurant serves high quality cuisine. Everything about it is superior, from the food to the atmosphere. That includes the service. I pride myself on having one of the best bistros around. You can’t be anything less than exceptional.”
“You don’t need to worry about that,” Rody boasts. “I’ve got plenty of experience waitering.” He decides not to mention how quickly he was fired. “Trust me, I won’t disappoin-” Rody trips before he can finish his sentence.
Vince stares at him. “...Right. I’ll hire an actual waiter as soon as I can. I shouldn’t need you for long.”
Rody stands and dusts himself off. “But I thought you knew your waiter was gonna quit? Why didn’t you look for a replacement before he quit?”
Vince shrugs. “I’ve been busy. With all the rehearsals and shows I haven’t had time to interview anyone. I had you anyway, so it wasn’t a big deal.”
“You really trust me that much?”
“Pfft- No! You were a last resort. You can’t possibly be a good waiter.”
Rody gets defensive quickly. “Not true! I don’t know why you would even think that!”
“Maybe it’s because you’re clumsy and uncoordinated?”
“Well-”
“I’ve seen you dance, Rody. Maybe it’s because you’re blunt and rude?”
“That’s not-”
“Or maybe it's because you don’t think things through, you’re easily overwhelmed, your memory is awful, you’re broke, you have poor hygiene…” Damn! Vince is good at shit talking. He verbally drags Rody as they approach the restaurant. They cross a bridge and Rody thinks of jumping.
Rody tunes Vince out until Vince stops in front of a small bistro. “We’re here.” The exterior is rather bland. It’s all gray, except for a thin red awning with the restaurant's name on it. La Gueule de Saturne. Rody, being French, could understand what that meant. The Mouth of Saturn. Rody never had a greek/roman mythology phase despite being a gifted kid, so he doesn’t understand what that really meant. If he did, he’d have only one thing to say about it: Freeekay!
Vince unlocks the door and leads Rody inside. The design quality does not improve. The tables are BAD. Four of them have two seats at them, which is normal and makes sense. But there are two with only one seat at them, which is unsettling. Did Vince forget to get enough chairs or something? The tables are the same size as the others, they could have two seats at them. Sure, some people come alone, but there could be an unused seat at their table!
Near the entrance is a small counter with a bell and register. A partition window is carved into the back wall. Next to the window is a switch and doors that lead to the kitchen. Rody’s eyes are attacked by gray, and white, and, oh god, beige! The only relief he gets are the chairs, the booth seats, and various carpets and curtains. They’re red, like the awning outside. Shout out Vince for having a consistent color palette! It's still ugly though.
What? Two customers came in while Rody was judging the interior design. But Rody successfully serves them and they leave satisfied. Vince explains how the whole restaurant works, like the menu and whatever restaurant type shit.
“Wow, Rody,” Vince says, “I didn’t expect you to be competent enough to serve two people. That was kind of impressive. I wouldn't believe it if I didn’t see it for myself.”
Rody beams. “I’m so glad we both saw that and it totally happened and was so cool! I would hate if I didn’t get to see that. Good thing I did.”
Rody is enjoying how cool it was that he did that when he hears this agitating, grating voice. “Excuse me!” Rody whips around to look behind him at the counter. “Can I get a table for one?” This guy looks like a SLUR. No wonder he’s eating alone.
“Of course!” Rody says, seating him and taking his order. The slur-looking guy eats his appetizer but chews in a super annoying way. It sounds bad. Mr. Slur asks Rody a question with food still in his mouth. Rody isn’t bothered by it because he is so locked in (and he does grosser things.)
As Rody picks up his main, Slurington the Third stands up. “This is taking forever! I’m leaving! Hhhrrhgdgg,” He walks off grumbling. Erm, what? Rody is still holding the main. Freaking freak couldn’t wait five seconds for his meal.
Vince is nonchalant about it all. Or at least he tries to be. “Did that one leave?” Rody nods. Vince scoffs. “He probably wanted fast food level service anyway, we wouldn’t want them coming here. It’s whatever I don’t even care for real. He still has to pay for the food he did eat though. Don’t let respectable customers leave, they won’t pay for further meals. And they won’t tip. But that did leave you with a dead plate. If you can’t serve it to a different customer, you’ll have to throw it away. A perfectly good meal gone to waste. Bring it back to the trash can-”
“Hey Vince, uh,” Rody interrupts. “I think he took the chair.”
“What.” The chair the Slur was sitting in is gone. “What the fuck! That guy is banned!” Vince presses the big red ban button.
Rody (freak) chooses to ignore the (freak) button that (freak) Vince has (freak.) “Now what.”
“Throw away that plate and wait for more customers. I’ll be in the back smoking.”
“In the kitchen??”
“He took my chair, Rody.” Rody gives him a solemn nod. He lost something once. Like his free will. But more importantly, he lost his girlfriend. Manon!!!!! AUUGHJGHUUGUH MANOOOOOON!!!!!!!!! He misses her. He stares at his reflection in the window. Life is cruel… but at least he has MCR. Hearing the doorway bells jingle, Rody decides he should probably do his job.
He turns around, plastering a smile on his face. “Hello, welcome to La Gueule De Saturne!” As the day goes on, the restaurant is a good amount of busy. Not overwhelming, but enough for Rody to meet the day’s quota. By the end of the day, Rody is worn out. He serves the last table, and table of two women. Rody is so tired he barely registers that he was asked a question. The woman looks at him expectantly. “I’m sorry,” he says. “Could you repeat that?”
“I was just wondering what the quality of the wine is here.” Oh shit. Did Vince tell him this? He can’t remember. But he can’t let the customer know that! That would be unprofessional. He says the first thing that comes to mind.
“It’s red??” The woman scoffs. Rody chooses not to add more context. He’s tired, and she doesn’t even order wine anyway. She does leave early though. Rody closes up, clearing the dishes and counting money and whatnot.
Vince meets Rody at the counter. “How was I?” Rody asks. “Better than your old waiter?”
“You’re not even close.” Vince lights a cigarette and places it between his lips. He breathes out a plume of smoke. “Did you get the money?”
Rody scoffs. “Yeah, I got it. You must make a lot without paying your employees.” Rody hands him the money.
“I pay the chefs. Just not you.” Vince organizes the day’s profit in the register. “You can head back. I don’t need you anymore.”
Rody lingers in front of the door. “You’re not coming with?”
Vince chuckles. “I never sleep in that hotel. I have an apartment above the restaurant. I sneak out every night and sneak back every morning.”
“Why? Wouldn’t it be easier to just stay there? Or tell the band you want to sleep at home?”
“First of all, that hotel is so disgusting. Sleeping there sounds like a nightmare.” It is. Rody hates it. “And you know how the band is. Your apartment isn’t far away. You could be sleeping in your own bed every night, but you don’t. You sleep with them in that hotel from hell.”
“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.” Rody had kind of assumed they made him sleep there to keep an eye on him so he wouldn’t run away or something. His old apartment wasn’t the nicest, but it was nicer than the hotel. It would be nice to at least sleep at home. It would be nicest to not be managing a boy band. But that’s life.
“You can keep the tips,” Vince says.
Rody gathers the tips and heads out. “Good night, Vince.” Vince nods once, a very Vince-ish goodbye.

Day two is challenging for sure. There are many customers, day one had been deceptively normal. Rody sometimes feels the need to sprint to serve customers. And they keep yelling at him! It’s not his fault the most effective way to take their order is to stand over them and watch them read the menu. This place is so crazy understaffed, why is Rody the only bitch working!!
Rody scrambles to grab a customer’s side and get it to them. Right as he’s about to hand them their dish, they stand up and say, “This is taking forever, I’m leaving!” Hello?? People really do treat service workers poorly damn. That means the only customers left are a table of four, and they already have their sides. Rody grumbles very mean things and walks to the kitchen to throw the plate away.
“Did someone leave again?” Vince calls out.
“Yeah,” Rody stands next to Vince, leaning against the wall as he talks. “You need to hire more people. Then you wouldn’t lose so much revenue when people leave.”
“Maybe they’re all leaving because the waiter spends his time in the kitchen distracting the chefs instead of serving them,” Vince retorts.
“I’m watching them! They’re slow eaters anyway,” Rody responds. “The band would’ve torn through your menu, you should’ve seen them last night. I brought them dinner and they demolished it. I had to fight Bakugo to get anything to eat.”
Vince smiles smugly. “That’s why I stay home. And this way they don’t beg for me to cook for them. They’d probably hate it anyway. They’d leave the bistro early, they’re palettes aren’t refined enough.”
“Pfft-” Rody chuckles. They would be a nightmare to serve. That might be why they get banned from so many places. Vince is one of the only normal ones when they go out to eat, he’s never disruptive and never orders anything. Wait, huuuuhhhhhh????? “Do you ever eat?” Rody drops with no context.
“Pardon??” Vince asks, clearly caught off guard.
“I haven’t seen you eat anything. Like ever.”
Vince gestures dismissively. “I don’t enjoy eating.”
Vague ass response. Rody prods for more information, “Why not? Isn’t that the main part of being a chef? Making food that tastes good?”
Vince thinks for a second. “I don’t have a sense of taste,” he admits. Rody knew this, he saw Vince’s interior design. “I lost my ability to taste food when I was younger.” Ohhhhhh. That makes more sense.
Rody fights his natural urge to be a dick about it. “But there’s gotta be something you like, right? What kind of chef doesn’t have a favorite food?” Why would he even want to be a chef he can’t taste? Vince weird as fuck.
Vince shoots him a nasty look. Rody’s question was still dick-ish. “Well, there isn’t much I really can choose from.”
Not an answer. Rody would typically be more formal with his boss, but he isn’t getting paid for this and Vince can’t fire him, so he skips formalities. “Gun to your head pick a food.”
Vince considers this. “I guess… lemons.”
“Lemon pie? Lemon tart?” Rody tries to rationalize his answer.
“No, just lemons.” Talking about this in the workplace is wild. What is this freak trying to imply? Then Rody remembers Vince eating the lemon off the top of his water at that one cafe. Vince is still a freak, but in a freakish way as opposed to a freaky way. “I think your table is done with their meal,” Vince says, prompting Rody to go do his job again.
The rest of the day consists of more waitering that I won’t bore you with. Rody stands behind the counter with Vince at the end of the day. “I didn’t know your restaurant was so popular, Vince.” Rody counts up his tip money. “It seemed deserted yesterday.”
“Some days are busier than others.” Vince leans on the counter, staring out at the restaurant. “It’s like the menu; every day it changes. Some days we have a good crowd, other days…” Vince trails off. “We don’t have many regulars. Our menu is the same every month, so they only come on the days they like the food. Even then they aren’t consistent.”
“Is that really so bad?” Rody doesn’t look up from the money. “You surely get newcomers.”
“Sometimes…” Vince turns away from the dining room, looking to Rody instead. “Sometimes it's a struggle to make enough to pay the employees. There’s not enough people in the door.”
“Woah- wow, sorry I had no idea.” Vince shrugs it off, his face neutral, as if profit loss doesn’t affect him at all. Rody gathers what little he brought and steps around Vince to the exit. “I’m gonna head out. Night, Vince.” Vince murmurs dismissively, watching Rody leave.

If Rody thought day two was bad, day three is so much worse! There’s so many people, every table is filled! There’s even a line! Whatever food Vince has cooking up today better be the best thing ever this is ridiculous.
Rody scurries his waiter ass to a table of two. “Hey everybody, are we ready to order?”
“Yeah we’ll have the fucking, uhhhhh,” a man says, gathering his thoughts. It’s not that hard when the menu is set you just say what you want!! “Uuuuhh two appetizers, refills on wine, and five desserts.”
“Goddamn!” Rody exclaims, gaining him weird looks from the table.
“...That’s it.” Shit that better be it! Rody scribbles everything down and goes to pick up a dish at the window. He submits the orders while he’s at the window. Who orders appetizers and desserts at the same time? And five for a table of two? Damn. His waitering continues. At one point when he picks up a dish from the windows, one of the chefs speaks to him.
“Sorry to bother you, but none of us can figure out what this means.” The chef passes him a meal ticket.
Rody inspects it. “Well that’s a… um…” What did he write? The meal tickets are super easy, A for appetizer, M for main, S for side, and D for dessert. But Rody can’t tell what this says. It’s got vertical lines and diagonal lines and horizontal lines, and a curved line?? “...It’s not a side??” Rody answers, puzzled.
“We got five meal tickets just like that!” Oh what!! Rody studies it closely. What does that say!! What the fuck did he write!! Then he has something revolutionary: a thought.
“Oh shit! If there’s five of these they’ve gotta be desserts. That table of two ordered five fucking desserts. Why do they need that many???” The table of two glares at him, Rody does NOT have good volume control.
Several incidents similar to that one occur throughout the day, with most of the swearing happening out loud. It’s not Rody’s fault! That job is so poopy fart. “Ughhghgghgh Viiiiiince,” Rody whines walking into the kitchen.
“Ughhghgghgh Rodyyyyyy,” Vince deadpans back.
“It’s so busy out there! No wonder your last waiter quit! There’s like three tables and they all have different wants and there's always something!! It’s always something these people always want something!” Rody hangs his head against the wall.
“That’s the job of a waiter.” Vince blows his complaints off. “Three tables is barely anything. You’ll live.”
“It is! It's so much!” Rody watches Vince watching the chefs. “Your job is easy, you just stand around and let other people do your work for you! You don’t even cook!”
“I’m managing. It’s important.” He makes a lap around the kitchen for emphasis. “I make sure the chefs don’t make any mistakes.” He gives his chefs some little tips on their techniques and whatnot. “You understand the drive for perfection. Only you make sure dance moves are perfect instead of food.”
Rody clutches his chest and gasps dramatically. “Dancing is a very respectable art form! And I don’t get nearly as much respect as you do.”
“Mn,” Vince hums thoughtfully. He stands next to Rody. “I could give you a few tips.”
Rody’s eyes light up. “Really?” This whole time he’s been winging it, but it’d be great to get real advice.
“Sure, why not.” Vince’s voice is flat, emotionless. “You’d better get back out there. Your tables want something again.” Rody groans and shuffles back to his evil no pay job.
Anyway the rest of the day passes and Rody waits for Vince at the counter. Vince returns from the kitchen, having dismissed all the chefs. THUMP! He drops a hefty stack of books on the counter. The books release a thick cloud of dust. Rody coughs. “What are these?”
“Manager books,” Vince responds.
Oh. “I kinda thought you were gonna teach me yourself.” The books have an assortment of peculiar titles: ‘Managing is as hard as taking candy from a grown adult unless you read this book!’ and ‘So you think you can manage a novice boy band?’ are standouts.
“I’m a busy man, I can’t hold your hand and guide you through this.” Rody pouts. That would have been convenient. “Those books should teach you. They were good enough for me.” Why the crud was Vince reading books about boy band management? Whatever, it’ll work.
Rody gathers his tip money greedily. “Sure you don’t wanna come with me to the hotel? Bakugo said he was gonna cook tonight.”
Vince shudders. “I’ll pass.”
Rody chuckles. “Yeah, I don’t blame you. Have a good night, Vince.” Rody waves. Vince tosses his hand up, waving half-heartedly.

“Why do desserts get made first?” Rody yells at the chefs. “We don’t have that many customers today! I don’t need four desserts, I need an appetizer! If I don’t get it, the customer’s gonna leave!”
The cooks don’t seem to care. “It’s just how it’s done,” one of them says, sliding him another dessert.
A customer behind him clears their throat. Rody whips around. “Oh what the hell do you want?”
The customers face twists in shock. “I was just going to ask how long this was going to take, but since you are rather rude I think I’ll leave!” They stand up and exiting, muttering how it was taking forever anyway.
The cook slides Rody the appetizer. Rody can’t even cry. He’s so tired man. He waiters the last table. After they leave, there’s no more customers in the restaurant. The menu today is ass, Rody ate some of the leftover appetizer. There’s nothing to do when it’s this slow. Good thing Rody can always pester Vince!
“So Vince,” Rody says, loitering in the kitchen. “Are you single?”
Vince is momentarily caught off guard. “Why do you ask?”
“Just curious. You’re pretty hot. Boy band hot,” Rody clarifies, as if that makes it better. “You gotta get a lotta ladies, right?”
“Sure,” Vince sounds bored talking about ladies (🏳️‍🌈👨‍❤️‍👨🌈👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨.)
Rody is way totally jealous. “So, you seeing any of them?”
“What are you digging for here-”
“It’s just- why are you here?” Rody asks. “You stand around and watch other people cook all day! Why can’t you get a manager and relax? Maybe settle down with someone?”
Vince’s voice is controlled, though he’s clearly offended by Rody’s suggestion. “I’ve invested a lot into this restaurant. I can’t leave it just like that. This is me settling down.” Liar liar pants on fire! He leaves for rehearsals! Checkmate, Charbonneau. “Besides, chasing petty romances isn’t everything in life.”
“Petty romances?” Rody is a big fan of romance. “But what’s even the point of doing all this if it isn’t for someone else? Who is it for if not a wife and kids?” Rody would be an excellent trad-wife.
“Isn’t it enough to have it for myself?” Vince asks.
“Yeah, if you’re WEIRD!!!” Rody can’t imagine a future without a wife (cough cough Manon.) How do you know if you’ve made it in life if you don’t get married, if you don’t have kids? How do you know you’ve done enough?
Rody is in a dick mood and he’s kinda mad at Vince, so now is the perfect time to piss him off! “Did you know Bakugo is actually good at cooking?”
“What?” Vince is dumbfounded. “But- but he’s Bakugo!”
“That’s what I thought! But his cooking opened my eyes. It was delicious!” Rody smirks. “It might even be better than your cooking!”
Vince is successfully ragebaited. “What.”
“I wouldn’t know though, since you never cook.” Oh yeah that got him. Vince looks like he might kill everyone in the room.
“Get out of my kitchen and go do your job.” Vince’s gaze is striking, his words sharp.
“But there aren’t any customers!” Rody argues.
“Get. Out.” Yeesh, someone’s got a temper. Rody scoots back to the dining area and is barred from the kitchen for the rest of the day. He serves three more parties. Borrrrring.
Rody thinks Vince isn’t going to meet him at the counter that day. He sure can hold a grudge. Rody’s about to leave when Vince appears, shoving something into his hands. Rody looks down at it, confused. “I thought this place didn’t have to-go boxes.”
“I got it from the restaurant down the street,” Vince admits. “Eat it. I promise it’ll be better than whatever Bakugo can muster up.” Wow his ego is easily bruised.
“Oh, thanks, Vince.” If it tastes anything like the day’s menu, Rody isn’t excited at all. But at least this way he’s guaranteed dinner tonight.
Vince smugly grins. “Don’t say I never cook anything. I made that for you myself.” Seems like he put a lot of effort into this. He even carved an R onto the side of the box.
“I’ll tell you what I think tomorrow.” Rody pushes the door open. “Goodnight, Vince.”
“See you tomorrow, Rody.”

The restaurant is dead today. There hasn’t been a single customer since Rody came in. He doesn’t want to know whatever it is they’re serving. He’s back in the back of the kitchen, talking to Vince throughout the day as usual.
“Did you like the meal?” Vince asks. He’s trying to keep cool, but he’s nervous about Rody’s answer.
“Well, it was, uh…” it was BAD. Rody’s palette is way too unrefined for stuff like that. Or at least that’s what he thinks. No way do people taste that and come back to the restaurant! Rich people are different. “...It was pretty bitter.”
“Mm.” Vince nods thoughtfully. “It was better than Bakugo’s right?”
“Uh, well-” It wasn’t. “Speaking of, the guys were thinking about putting on a concert here.”
“No.” Vince shoots him down.
“C’mon Vince, please! We already have an in with the owner~” Rody nudges Vince.
Vince ponders this. “Maybe…” He looks out to the empty dining area. “I suppose a concert would attract customers.” He sighs in defeat. “They can perform here.”
“Yes!” Rody does a little victory dance that makes Vince want to hurl. “You won’t regret this! It’ll be the most fun this restaurant has ever seen!”
“It’s happening tomorrow,” Vince declares. “You can get the band ready by then, can’t you?”
“What? Yeah, I guess? But that’s so sudden. I can’t help them rehearse, and you won’t be able to practice with them.”
“It needs to happen tomorrow because that’s the last day you’re working. I’ve found a replacement waiter.” Vince glances at the chefs, who are engrossed in their own conversations. “I need the money to make the quota. I can hardly pay the cooks.”
“You can count on me boss!” Rody gives him a fat thumbs up. “The Side Characterz won’t let you down!” Rody takes Vince’s arm, pulling him towards the office. “C’mon, we need to prepare!” Rody convinces Vince to make flyers and they move the tables around to make room for the dancing. The chefs even helped after awhile, they got bored. They work non-stop, pausing only to serve a table of two. By the end of the day, they’ve converted the restaurant into the perfect venue for any boy band.
Rody walks back to the hotel with Vince. They carry flyers promoting tomorrow’s show. The flyers are passed off to the band members when they reach the room. Since they won’t be rehearsing tomorrow, the band has time to pass the flyers out themselves and promote themselves while Vince and Rody are at work.
“Thanks again for helping,” Rody tells Vince.
Vince shrugs. “You couldn’t carry them by yourself.” Vince steps out of the hotel room, heading back to his apartment.
“Goodnight, Vince.” Rody follows him to the doorframe.
Vince pauses. “...Goodnight, Rody.”

The day of the concert is moderately busy already, the numbers of customers increasing as it nears evening. People are excited to see The Side Characterz. “The show starts at 6:30,” Rody tells the customers. Vince brings out more tables. The Side Characterz aren’t this well known, they must be advertising like crazy.
An hour before start time, The Side Characterz roll into the restaurant. “What are you all doing here? Shouldn’t you be promoting the show?” Rody asks.
Forcas speaks for the group, “We ran out of flyers before lunch and we got tired of yelling at people.” Rody looks skeptically at him. “Look at all the people! We don’t have to worry about it. So,” Forcas leans against the counter, “table for five?”
Rody grabs a chair and seats them at a booth. He passes out their menus. “Yo why the fuck are there only four food options on this thang?” McCoy tosses his menu on the table.
“That’s how Vince runs the restaurant,” Rody replies.
Bakugo slaps his menu down. “I’m NOT eating this!”
“Oh my god, just order something.” Rody is not in the mood to put up with them right now.
Only Winnie, Forcas, and Co-worker are brave enough to order appetizers. Rody gives them their orders one at a time and leaves to serve other patrons. He watches them from the corner of his eye. Co-worker seems to like it enough, he eats his whole plate. Forcas picks at it, eating a solid amount. He doesn’t have a normal diet anyway, he eats whatever he wants whenever he wants. Winnie only takes a few bites. He tries to pawn it off onto Bakugo and McCoy. They give in and eat a bit out of curiosity. It’s obvious they don’t like it. Needless to say, none of them order anything else.
“I was supposed to have a dinner party tonight.” Vince appears out of nowhere, startling Rody. “The guests will be eating down here instead. They’ll be watching the show.”
Rody jokes, “Yeesh, puts some pressure on your performance.”
“You need to serve them well,” Vince continues, ignoring Rody. “These are important people in the food industry. You have to give them a good impression.” And that good impression includes The Side Characterz? Yeah, right. If Vince thinks it’ll work, maybe it will. The door bell rings. “That’s them.” A group of four, uptight looking people wait at the entrance. “I’ll greet them.” Vince walks over and makes small talk.
Rody continues his job like normal. He tries to be polite with Vince’s fancy industry people. They keep asking questions that are too smart for him. It's a bit awkward since they’re seated in the booth right next to The Side Characterz. Rody ignores their shouts at him and just tries to do his job. Even then, he still has to scold them to get onstage. He feels like a single mom who works two jobs, but he hates his kids.
“Hello La Gueule De Saturne regulars and our fans!” Forcas projects to the restaurant. “Some of you might recognize Vincent Charbonneau, aka the owner of this restaurant, aka our bad boy! Shout out to him for letting us use his restaurant for a gig!” This receives light applause. Vince turns away from the crowd, embarrassed. “We’ve got quite the show for you tonight! Hit it, boys!”
The bust into their usual song and dance routines. The space in the restaurant is less than they normally have, they keep knocking into each other. Vince puts extra effort into this show. His performance is more than he normally gives. In general, The Side Characterz are getting better. Rody can almost imagine them being successful someday. Almost.
Rody still has to serve customers through the show. He catches Vince’s fancy guests chattering about him. Rody eavesdrops on them. They talk about Vince’s food, they enjoy its bitter, selfish taste. Yet they find it funny that the chef Charbonneau spends his free time in a boy band. If he practiced his cooking, they say, his restaurant wouldn’t be in such a precarious situation.
The rest of the customers aren’t as rude. None of them fall asleep during the show. Some of them snicker, clearly thinking the band is stupid and silly, But some whisper to each other, excitedly discussing the band. Do they actually have fans? Wowza, they really are getting better!
The band closes their set and the restaurant starts closing up too. Rody made good tips, and they were able to make all the money they needed for the previous day’s quotas. Rody talks with the band while Vince speaks with his food industry people. They’re all excited, it was their best show yet. Vince doesn’t share their enthusiasm. His guests leave and the band tries to regroup with him.
“Great job tonight, Vince!” Winnie beams at him. “Thanks again for letting us play at your restaurant!”
Vince keeps his eyes steady on the floor. “It was a one time thing. After this show,” he clenches his jaw, his voice cold, “The Side Characterz are banned!”
“What?!?” Co-worker laughs lightly. “You can’t be serious!”
“Why shouldn’t I be?” Vince taunts. “Every other restaurant we play has banned us. It only takes them one show to realize this band is terrible. Face it. This is how it will always be.”
Forcas steps forward, attempting to reason with him. “You’re wrong, Vince. Did you see the crowd tonight? People actually liked us!” The tension is heavy. Vince has never been this upset before.
Vince scoffs, walking away from the band. “It doesn’t matter. Those people are nothing. They aren’t enough to make this worth it.”
Rody follows after him. “Vince-”
“Didn’t you hear me? The Side Characterz are banned!” He slams the big red ban button. Rody ushers the band out. Arguing with Vince now won’t help anything. The Side Characterz stay at the hotel while Rody goes back to the restaurant.
The lights are turned off when Rody arrives, the cooks have all gone home. The front door is locked. Vince never gave Rody a key. Rody climbs over the fence that leads to the alleyway. He went back there to try the kitchen door, but he finds Vince leaning against the wall, smoking. “Didn’t I ban you?” Vince addresses Rody, smoke trailing from his mouth.
“Technically, you banned The Side Characterz. I’m just their manager.” Rody’s proud of his loophole.
Vince rolls his eyes and scoffs, but he lets Rody stay. “Why did you come back?”
“Um, you were upset and it's kinda my job to check on you, I think? Manager job, not waiter,” Rody stutters. Vince sneers at him, unamused. “And I didn’t get my tip money.”
“So what? You came here to talk?”
“Yeah that was the goal.” Vince doesn’t say anything in response. Damn. Uhhhhh….. “So like. You banning the band? Not cool.”
Vince breathes a fat cloud of smoke in Rody’s face. “It’s my restaurant. I can ban whoever I want.”
Rody coughs and chokes for a hot second. “Yeah, but it’s also your band!” He wheezes out.
“I only joined the band to promote the restaurant,” Vince explains.
“And you won’t let them play at the restaurant?” Rody is truly gobsmacked by this. “Vince, that’s stupid, you know that, right?” Vince doesn’t register what Rody is talking about. “If people know about your restaurant from the band, they’re going to expect something at least a little band related at the restaurant.”
“Well they won’t anymore.”
“What good did joining do you if you were going to ban them anyway?”
“It’s not that simple, Rody!” Vince shouts. “I dedicated my whole life to the bistro! I started with nothing. Nothing!” He grimaces. “I can’t even taste.” He pauses, his breath shakes. “I went to culinary school, I learned how to run a business, I built this restaurant from the ground up. It means everything to me. When the financial problems started, I had to do something. I can’t lose the bistro. I needed more customers through the door. The band happened to eat here one day, Co-worker still had the money for it. Before I knew it, I was in their band, I was their bad boy.” Vince laughs coldly. “I’m not a pop star. I’m a chef.”
Rody doesn’t say anything. It appears this is a delicate situation. Rody isn’t good at delicate. Vince continues speaking, “I’m going to quit the band.” No what, no! Vince can’t quit the band! Rody would have to find another bad boy! He can’t imagine there’s another man in France as hot as Vince, not to mention he’d also have to be good at singing and dancing!
“Vince, you can’t quit the band! The Side Characterz need you!” Vince is unaffected by this, he don’t give a damn about them. Rody quickly changes tactics. “Look, I get that the band is kinda terrible and hard to put up with. But you can’t just quit on them!”
“Why not?” Vince retorts. “You’re the one who said I never should have joined.”
“I didn’t mean it like that!” Rody searches for something to make him stay. “I’m not going to lie to you, Vince. If I were you, I’d quit too. I wish I could quit now. But I can’t. The Side Characterz are weird and loud and bad at everything, but I have to stick with them. Sometimes, it feels impossible to deal with them. You’re the most normal one out of all of them.” Vince’s eyes widen, he watches Rody with curiosity.
Rody continues, leveling with Vince. “This week has been horrible in a lot of ways. But it’s been kinda nice getting to know you more, if that makes sense? You don’t talk much with the others around. This sounds stupid, but I don’t want you to leave. I’d go crazy without you around.” Rody laughs nervously.
Vince smirks. “God, this is more corny than when you talk about your girlfriend.”
“Shut up!!!” Rody’s face burns. “I just mean that if I can’t quit then neither can you. Don’t leave me to face them alone, Vince.” He shakes Vince’s shoulders. “Don’t leave me alone!!” Vince pushes Rody off of him. Vince takes a long drag of his cigarette, contemplating. “You’ll still have the restaurant. There was a good crowd there tonight. It could be like that every night, you could hire a good manager for when you’re on tour! And when the year is over we’ll both come back to France and you’ll never have to see me again. You can be a chef forever after. You just gotta stick with the band as long as I have to, deal?” Rody sticks out his hand.
Vince looks over to the restaurant, his eyes lingering on it. He murmurs to himself, glancing at Rody. He deliberates for a minute. Rody holds his breath. “Fine.” Vince doesn’t shake Rody’s hand. “But I’m not unbanning The Side Characterz.” Rody doesn’t press the issue.
Vince tosses his cigarette to the ground and stomps it out. “Do you want some real manager lessons on your last day?” Vince asks Rody.
“Wait- you’re actually gonna teach me something? Not just give me books?” Vince nods. “Yeah, that would be great! Thanks!”
Vince clicks the key into the lock. “Sure,” he says casually. “Helping you is helpful for me.” The door swings open and Vince leads Rody to his office. There, they spend the night learning how to budget, scheduling, what to say at interviews, plus other important managing tips. With this week behind him, Rody gains important skills, and the year dwindles away. If things keep going at this rate, it’ll be over before he knows it.

Chapter Text

“Uh, guys? You might wanna take a look at this.” Rody was peacefully checking the band's official email account when he noticed something really scary!
The Side Characterz crowd around the computer. Forcas adjusts his glasses and squints at the screen. “What the fart is this?”
There's a threatening email in their inbox. The subject is “Your final performance.”
The email reads: Hello, Side Characterz. It appears that you've been trying to start a little boy band here in France. Unfortunately, France already has a boy band, and we aren't leaving anytime soon. If you wish to continue playing in France, you'll have to prove you're worthy of being France’s favorite boy band. There's a battle of the bands happening in three days time. There we shall prove who is the better band. The necessary information is linked below. France only has room for one boy band. Let's see which one of us it shall be. Your friends, The Main Characterz.
“Who the fuck are The Main Characterz?” Bakugo exclaims.
“They have our name, but, like, different brah,” McCoy points out.
“They're trying to sound better than us! Who would see The Side Characterz over The Main Characterz?” Co-worker asks, pissed.
“Isn't that kind of a good thing though?” Winnie questions. “If they purposefully named themselves to sound better than us, that means they're intimidated by us.”
“Obviously they're intimidated by us. You don't send a threatening email to someone you aren't intimidated by,” Vince proclaims.
Forcas scoffs. “We're not scared of some email, right boys?” The band nods confidently. “We don't need to go to that battle of the bands.” Forcas takes the mouse and moves to delete the email.
“Wait!” Rody stops Forcas. “We could still go. It'd be a good way to get the word out about the band. And it's not a bad idea to get to know the competition.”
“It'd probably be fun too yo. Singing with other bands,” McCoy adds.
“But if we do go it'll look like we're scared of them. We aren't,” Vince argues.
“Let's take a vote,” Winnie suggests. “Everyone who wants to go to the battle of the bands, raise your hand.” Everyone raises their hands except for Vince and Bakugo, notorious haters. “It's settled. We're going to the battle of the bands!”
The Side Characterz cheer and chatter excitedly. “We'd better rehearse. Gotta be at our best to crush the other bands!” Co-worker exclaims.
Rody searches for his notepad that he uses all the time. “I wrote a new song that'll be great for the competition!”
The band runs around practicing their moves and singing and whatever you get the picture. Three days later, it's time for the battle of the bands. They leave the hotel, nervous, but excited. This is their biggest opportunity yet. They make it to the venue and Rody searches for the band entrance. When he applied online, it said bands were supposed to enter from the back to sign in. Rody checks everywhere but can't seem to find the entrance. It's the right place, he knows from the huge poster for the battle of the bands. So where is the door?
“Are you lost?” Rody turns around to see the silhouette of a woman standing in the shadows behind him.
“Uh, yes?” He decides to ask for the woman's help because she offered it. “I’m a band manager and I can't find the entrance. Do you know where it is?”
She doesn't answer. “Which band do you manage?”
Why does it matter? “Um. The Side Characterz?? We're signed up for the competition. Can you tell me where the entrance is?”
The woman laughs. “Why don’t you go get the band and I'll show you where to enter.” Ok?? This lady is weird and kind of freaking Rody out. When he brings The Side Characterz back, there are more silhouettes with the woman's. Something’s wrong.
“So,” The woman's voice is deep and thick with contempt. “These are The Side Characterz? Ha! You're more pathetic than I thought you would be.”
What!!!!! Rody is shocked and hurt. “Who even are you?”
She cackles like a cartoon villain. “I think that you already know. Isn't that right, Vincent?” She steps into the light. Rody doesn't recognize her. From the look on his face, neither does Vince. Her hair is dark like Vince’s, she's tall, pale, and overall tired looking, like Vince. They have the same shifty vibe about them. Hell, even their faces are similar. Rody can almost figure out how she knows him. It's on the tippy of his tongue and driving him crazy. The woman speaks before he can. “Come on, Vincent. Don't you remember your sister?”
WHAT THE SIGMA !?!?!??! The Side Characterz gasp. Vince never told them he had a sister!!! Bakugo is personally offended.
Vince is lost for a second. “Bok-su?” He asks finally. Bok-su nods and grins. “What are you doing here? You live in South Korea.”
Bok-su fake gasps. “I can't just take a trip to see my dear brother?”
“You never visit,” retorts Vince. “We haven't seen each other since we were children.” The Side Characterz gasp again. Things are getting juicy.
“Then it's a long due reunion. I thought it'd be nice to see what you're up to.” She circles around the band like that one evil lion, examining them. “I stopped by your restaurant but you weren't there. The waiter told me you were at a band rehearsal. It surprised me. I never thought you'd be a singer. And in a boy band, no less.”
Vince shrugs. “I have many talents.” He raises an eyebrow. “Why are you here, at this competition? You could have called me.”
She grins. “I came to compete, of course.” The Side Characterz are perplexed. Bok-su stands in front of them. “You aren't the only one with a boy band.”
She snaps her fingers. Five figures emerge from the shadows boogieing. “I hope you weren’t planning to get first place.” The six of them do the saja boys pose, with Bok-su in the middle. “Because The Main Characterz are going to win!”
The Side Characterz gasp again like a bunch of useless idiots. They're The Main Characterz and they were the ones who sent that scary email! They knew it would get them to come to the battle of the bands. Bok-su threatened them to come here just to flex her band to her brother who she hasn't seen in like 20 years.
Co-worker is the first to speak. “Well slap my rear and call me Paul Revere, I know that guy!” He runs up to a man wearing a business suit posed in the back of the group. “Sup, newbie!” Co-worker smacks his ass. “How's it hanging?”
The man blinks, startled. “...I'm in a boy band now.”
“Awesome!” Co-worker exclaims, like it wasn't extremely obvious. “So am I!” Co-worker wraps his arm around the man's shoulder and turns around to The Side Characterz. “This is my buddy Protag from work.”
Protag wrestles from Co-worker’s grip. “Actually, my name is-”
“Can it, glasses,” Co-worker cuts him off. “Crazy how we're both in boy bands now. Small world, right? Anyway, I didn't think they'd let you out of the office. I mean, the only way they let me go was…” Co-worker continues to talk at Protag, who looks rather bored by the whole conversation.
Forcas walks over to a girl who looks like a nun. “WHATT??? ANGELICA???!!”
Angelica smiles. “Hi, Forcas!”
Forcas goes beast mode. “BRUUHHH, HOW’D THE CHURCH LET YOU GO??”
Angelica shrugs. “I’m honestly not sure, but I’m trying to distance myself as much as possible, and this seemed like a good way.”
“Ohhh, yeah that makes sense.” Forcas does his angel grin thing. “Sorry I ditched you for a while,” He gestures to the band. “I got recruited for this boy band!”
“Yeah, uh, it’s okay. I also got recruited for a boy band, so.”
Forcas gives a shifty glance to the others. “So about that thing, I totally got a plan for that so don’t even worry, I got it handled. Basically I’m gonna…” he continues whispering to Angelica.
McCoy moves in front of The Side Characterz. “Yo, is that June?” He walks to June and fist bumps her. “Yoooo, what’s up June?”
“Boy band.” June replies, moving their fist bump into a handshake. “How about you?”
“Also boy band.” McCoy twists June’s hand in a practiced motion. “Mine’s definitely better though.”
“No way!” June stacks her other hand on top of McCoy’s. “The Main Characterz are France’s best boy band!”
“Nah.” McCoy makes a bird with his hand and June copies him. “The Side Characterz got you beat any day!” They keep arguing about their bands as their handshake becomes more complex.
Winnie steps to the boy in the back. “Augustine?” His face lights up. “Auggie!” Winnie hugs him tight. “What are you doing here? I thought you were staying home for school!”
Augustine smiles softly, hugging him back. “Well, y’know… boy band stuff.”
Winnie’s grip loosens. “Right.” He drops his hands to his side. Winnie’s eyes flick around, absorbing the situation. “So, you’re a Main Character?” Augustine nods. Winnie’s smile falters for a second. “That’s fun. Boy bands are fun.” Silence spreads out between the two. They both hesitate to say anything more. Winnie asks the question hanging in the air. “Why didn’t you ask to join The Side Characterz? Why did you join a different boy band?”
Augustine gestures nervously. “Winnie, c’mon, we don’t have to-”
“No! We’re not keeping secrets anymore!” Winnie grabs Augustine’s shoulder, looking him in the eyes. “You could have joined my band, we would’ve kicked out Bakugo!”
“Winnie, please, let’s do this some other time alright?” He steps out of Winnie’s grasp. “Not right now.” He turns his head away from Winnie.
Winnie keeps his eyes locked on Augustine, staring him down. After a short while, he breaks. “Fine. We’ll talk later.” Winnie starts to join up with The Side Characterz.
“Wait!” Augustine holds his hand out. “We could still catch up, right?” Winnie turns back and gives Augustine a small smile. The two friends recount what’s been happening to them, skirting around the rival boy band thing.
The only ones who aren’t talking to a Main Character are Rody, Vince, and Bakugo, leaving them as the only ones to hear Bok-su's evil speech. Bok-su has a wicked grin on her face. “Do you see now, Vincent? My band was perfectly crafted to destroy yours. After we beat you in this competition, you won't be able to sing in France ever again! Then, you'll have to move back to Korea if you want to continue your career!”
Vince is unbothered by her threats. “Is that what this is about?” He rolls his eyes. “Look, I didn't move to France on purpose. I was nine. I didn't have a choice.”
Bok-su raises her voice. “You abandoned me, your twin sister!” Rody and Bakugo gasp. They can't help themselves, Vince’s family drama is just so shocking! She keeps shouting. “You were my closest friend, and you left me overnight! I never even got the chance to say goodbye.”
“I had no idea what was happening,” Vince argues. “How was I supposed to know mom was taking me out of the country?” Rody and Bakugo are about to gasp again, but glares from Vince and Bok-su stop them. Vince sighs and reasons with Bok-su. “Look, it's been a while since we've seen each other. How about we catch up over drinks sometime? After the competition."
“You’re too late for drinks.” Bok-su snaps her fingers and the final Main Character steps out of the shadows. This time Vince is the one who gasps. He looks just like Vince if Vince had an emo haircut and a gambling addiction. “Meet Edwyn Gates, aka my new brother!!!!”
Eddie nods at them. Vince is exasperated. “If you have a new brother, what do you need me for?”
Bok-su frowns. “You still abandoned me. My life was crushed when you left. My dreams went down the drain. I'm here to show you what that feels like.”
“What, did you not become a doctor or something?”
Bok-su stiffens, a cloud passing over her eyes. “No, I didn't,” she says through gritted teeth. Yeesh, tou-chy!
She claps her hands twice and The Main Characterz return to her. “Good luck, boys,” Bok-su’s voice is sharp. “You'll need all the luck you can get to face us, The Main Characterz!” They strike a clearly practiced pose, “Mark my words, you'll all feel the wrath of Bok-su Go!”
Bakugo throws his hands out defensively. “Woah woah woah! Whoever said I was with you? I am not a part of all that!” He points at The Main Characterz.
“Actually, she's talking about herself,” Rody gently explains.
Bakugo grumbles. “Who let that extra have my name?
“You see, her first name is Bok-su and her last name is Go, so together it's Bok-su Go, which sounds like your name." Rody places a hand on Bakugo's shoulder. "She's Bok-SU Go and you're BaKUgo, get it?”
Bakugo considers this. “I'll let it slide this time,” he decides.
Rody turns back to spit his own insults at The Main Characterz, but they disappeared. Winnie points out that they went inside through the door that was there the whole time.
They walk in the venue, finding themselves in a large waiting area. All the other bands are here, The Side Characterz were the last to arrive. The room is packed. With every band warming up, it's incredibly loud. What good is it practicing if you can't even hear yourself play? Rody sends the band to wait in the corner, far from where The Main Characterz stand.
Rody pushes through the crowd to sign in. There are a total of twelve bands competing. The first round eliminates six bands, the next round eliminates four more, and the final round has the remaining two bands showdown. Whoever wins the last round is guaranteed a cash prize and a spot on the cover of France’s fourteenth most popular music magazine, Scales: Music is real.
According to the list, they’ll be going last. The Main Characterz are going tenth. In between them is a band called The Bass Brothers. Rody spots them easily in the room. Three men are arguing with each other, all holding bass guitars. They don’t look like they’re related, but they sure do fight like brothers. They seem easy to beat.
In fact, none of the bands appear to be a challenge. There’s an acapella group dressed in vocaloid cosplay who call themselves Project Glee-va. They can’t harmonize for shit though. Another band is a girl group known simply as Classical. They only play classical music, which would be cool if their instruments were tuned. Then there’s the guy who entered as a one man band, with the drum on his back and all that jazz. He has the nerve to name himself Big Bad Band. In comparison to these bands, The Side Characterz seem good. The only real threat is The Main Characterz. Rody tries not to worry about them. They can’t be that good, right?
The host’s voice blares through the speakers, signalling the start of the show. Oh god, were they really that late? Rody sneaks backstage, catching a glimpse of what’s happening. “Hello everypony and welcome to this year’s battle of the bands!” The crowd cheers like an audience. “I’ll be your host for tonight. We’ve got twelve bands eagerly waiting to show you what they’re made of! But only one band can take home the title of the best band of all! But who will it be? That’s not up to you or me to decide. Let’s give a big round of applause to our wonderful judges!” The audience gives a big round of applause.
The host continues introducing the judges. “Sitting in the chair on the right, it's the man who can turn dogs into pop stars. It’s the one and only Gustavo Rocque!” Gustavo has a very intimidating presence. This is the same guy who produced the best boy bands of all time! He was the mastermind behind Big Time Rush, Rody’s favorite boy band. With Gustavo as one of the judges, things may get hairy for The Side Characterz. Gustavo leans back in his chair, a smug grin plastered on his face. Rody gulps.
“And in the middle chair, we have the most popular judge ever. You may know him for being a judge. Everybody give it up for Simon Cowell!” Rody isn’t shocked by this. Simon Cowell judges every competition. But damn, that’s still a lot of pressure. Will The Side Characterz hold up to Simon Cowell’s standards? Wait, didn’t his record label sign One Direction, the band that prevented Big Time Rush from becoming mega popular? Oh nards, Rody’s really in for it now!
“Last but not least, our very special guest judge. He’s tall, he’s strong, but is he handsome? Let me know when you see him! It’s your favorite hero, All Might!” All Might? Rody squints at him. He doesn’t look familiar. Well, you can’t know everybody. Rody is still nervous because All Might is smiling and looks very buff. Do buff guys like boy bands? Rody isn’t sure.
He notices Bakugo beside him. When did he get here? Bakugo’s presence reminds Rody that he heard of All Might before, Bakugo mentioned him once. Bakugo is a fan of All Might if memory serves correctly. Rody grins at him. "All Might is one of the judges! Aren't you excited?"
Bakugo blushes slightly and scoffs. "Tch. I've seen All Might before, nothing exciting." He avoids eye contact.
Rody catches him watching All Might from backstage. "You're watching All Might."
"Whatever extra."
"You're nervous to perform in front of All Might, aren't you?"
Bakugo hesitates. "...Yeah. I want to prove myself."
Rody puts his hand on Bakugo's shoulder and smiles brightly. "You're one of our best members. I think you could do anything you put your mind to."
Bakugo brushes off Rody's compliment. "Yeah well, try telling the other guys that." Bakugo's face is a deep shade of red. He inches away from Rody.
The host finishes the opening announcements and introduces the first band, a duo called Jazz². “We’d better head back.” Rody leads Bakugo back to the waiting area, where they join up with The Side Characterz.
“We need to win!” Bakugo shouts, startling the band. “All Might is out there and I can’t have you extras making me look bad!”
Rody rubs his chin. “We’ve got a pretty strong set. We start off with Baby love you babygirl, the remastered version of course. Then for round two, you’ll be playing I’m yours, classic. And if you make it to the final round, we’ll drop our new song!”
“We will make it,” Forcas states. “Otherwise it’d be a waste of a good song. So we have to crush this competition!” The Side Characterz holler in agreement. “I promise to sing the best you’ve ever heard! Will that be enough for All Might?” Forcas elbows Bakugo.
“It better be,” Bakugo scoffs. “We need to practice now. That first band just finished. If we don’t practice now we’ll never get to!”
McCoy lays on the floor, glancing up to speak. “Chill out, man. We’ve been practicing for so long! Give it a rest already.” Bakugo has an evil explosive fire in him as he glares at McCoy. It’s like the whole room gets hotter. McCoy sits up, backing off. “I guess we can run it again.”

Bakugo makes them run it an absurd amount of times for how short of a window they have. Before they know it, The Main Characterz are called onto perform. Bakugo lets them stop practicing so they can spy on The Main Characterz. Rody helps them sneak backstage. When the lights come on, The Main Characterz are posed in a pyramid like cheerleaders. Bok-su stands at the top.
The music starts and Bok-su begins to sing. Shit, her voice is great. It’s low and raspy, but somehow magnetic, it’s the glue that brings the song together. She drops gracefully to the floor, the pyramid behind her falling into position. Bok-su sings: Love babygirl, you love, girl my, be you will, girl my ooooooh, pretty you’re, devine you’re, mine you’re, oh baby.
What? “Does this song sound familiar to anyone else?” Winnie whispers. Rody thought it just sounded like another generic pop song. But listening closer to the lyrics, he realizes that he’s heard the song before. The first night with The Side Characterz at their concert. It’s one of the songs they played!
Forcas recognizes it. “It’s Baby love you babygirl! They're singing it backwards!”
“What? Why?” Vince shoves to the front. “That song is terrible.”
Co-worker mutters, “How should we know? She’s your sister!”
“D’you think she’d copy one of our songs just to get back at Vince?” McCoy thinks out loud.
“We should sue her!” Bakugo exclaims under his breath. “She’s using our song!”
“We need a different song to open with, the judges will think we copied them!” Forcas whispers fiercely.
“How about we move the songs up by one?” Winnie suggests. “Start with I’m yours and go from there?”
“What would we do for the final round?” Co-worker questions. “We only rehearsed those three songs!”
The Main Characterz are about to end the song, Rody can tell from the key change. “We’ll figure it out later, you guys have to go!” Rody hurries them out. From the corner of his eye, he can see The Main Characterz on stage. Their choreography looks perfectly synchronized and fluid. Their harmonies are incredible. Even their stage presence is greater than The Side Characterz. The crowd goes wild when they finish.
“That was The Main Characterz original song, Babygirl you love baby!” The host announces. They were fantastic. The curtains close and The Main Characterz saunter toward Rody. Bok-su hip checks him as she passes, causing him to stumble. When he rights himself, he notices June and Angelica lingering in front of him.
“Hey um, Rody, right?” June whispers to him. “We just thought you should know…” She glances around. “The stage is coated in lube.”
Rody is floored. Hello?!?! He blinks slowly. “What? Did you like. Slip and fall or something?”
Angelica shakes her head. “Bok-su had us pour it during our song. She worked it into the choreography.”
“She’s trying to sabotage your band,” June adds.
Rody is taken aback. FREAK! Stealing their song wasn’t enough apparently. “But wait. Why’d she put it on now? The Side Characterz aren’t next.” The Bass Brothers walk on as the host announces them. “They’re on after these guys.” Angelica and June give Rody a supportive thumbs up and slink out.
The Bass Brothers have a funky sound. Three basses is crazy work. They seem to be ok. It’s not like you dance while playing the bass. But one of the band members steps and slips and falls, crashing into another member. The music stops and one of the basses goes flying into the wings. The Bass Brothers yell at each other. Their arguing soon becomes physical. The fistfight is nasty. Top ten messiest public breakups after Huntrix for sure.
Rody saves the tossed bass guitar. He sets it next to his acoustic guitar. Cute! They’re friends now! Or perhaps… more than friends. The thought instantly saddens Rody, like everything else that is at all romantic. His guitar has a girlfriend, but he doesn’t. He fishes the locket out of his pocket. It catches a beam of light, shining in the dark. He opens it and stares at the picture inside. Manon picked a good photo of them, he thinks. She looks so happy. Is she happy now, without him? Will the bass guitar be happy without the acoustic? If the bass got in debt with the mob, would she consider selling the acoustic to six strangers? Would the acoustic be crazy enough to go along with it?
This is getting weird and Rody stops thinking about it. That’s when he notices a mop propped up against the wall. The curtains are down while the security team tries to stop The Bass Brothers from fighting. Perfect opportunity to go janitor mode. Rody grabs the mop and scrubs as fast as he can. The floor is still a bit slippery when The Side Characterz are called onstage. Rody rushes off.
The Side Characterz kick the song off by harmonizing. Bok-su was a good singer, but no one can compete with Forcas. He takes the first verse, his voice captivating with a tinge of heartache, perfect for the song. The dancing is smooth, thank god, Bakugo putting his all into it. They’ve improved quite a bit since their first concert. A single dad watching his only son ace the big AP human geography exam he’d spent weeks studying for would probably be proud. That’s how Rody feels watching the band.
Rody peaks out to the crowd. They love it. Some of them lip-sync to the second chorus. Their smiles are bright, cheered up after the disaster with The Bass Brothers. One woman reaches out when McCoy flashes his abs. Several other ladies faint. The song reaches the bridge, and The Side Characterz come together in the middle. But uh oh! Rody missed a spot on the floor, and Co-worker trips! Rody holds his breath. Forcas catches Co-worker before he falls, quickly sweeping him up into the air. The Side Characterz keep singing like this was always the plan. The crowd freaks out. Forcas holds Co-worker in the lift until the last chorus, gently setting him down and starting the dance back up again.
The song ends, and the crowd cheers. Rody breathes a sigh of relief. They made it through round one, and they were pretty good! But were they good enough? All the bands are ushered on stage for the results of the first round. The Side Characterz crowd together. The host picks up an envelope from the judges.
The host stands in front of the bands. “Let’s give it up for our amazing musicians!” The crowd applauses uproariously. “We heard so many great performances tonight! But only half of these bands will be moving on to the next round. Are you ready?!” The crowd cheers even louder. The host flicks open the envelope and pulls the paper out. “The first band to move on to the second round is…” the room goes quiet, all the bands awaiting the result, “...The Main Characterz!”
Dammit! Rody expected this, but it still sucks. The Main Characterz celebrate and hug each other and laugh and smile and whatever. Those cheating bastards. The host announces four more bands that aren’t The Side Characterz. “And the final band to make it to round two…” Rody covers his eyes, like not looking will change the result. Did they notice Co-worker’s slip up? Are The Main Characterz pulling strings with the judges? Gustavo probably thinks they’re the worst boy band in existence. “...The Side Characterz!” Nevermind. The Side Characterz celebrate the same way they always do. “And with that, we’ll have a brief intermission before round two! You don’t want to miss it!”
The host dismisses the six losers and sends the six winners back to prepare for the next round. The Side Characterz babble excitedly like stupidheads when they make it back to the waiting area. “Good job guys!” Rody hypes them up. They’re about to start going crazy mode when Bok-su walks up to them, slow clapping. The Main Characterz pose behind her.
“Good job making it to round two,” her voice drips with fake sincerity. “You just barely slid in at the end.”
“YOU!!!!!!” Rody leaps out in front of The Side Characterz, roaring at Bok-su. “You cheated!!! You stole our song!!!!! You lubed the stage!!!!!!!”
Bok-su leans forward, a small grin on her face. “Where’s your proof?” Rody falters. He glances at Angelica and June, who shake their heads aggressively. “Exactly. Why would I do that?”
“Because you hate us and you’re evil!!!”
She snickers. “It’s not my fault we’re the better band.”
Rody rolls up his sleeve and winds up a punch. Co-worker lets out an incredibly dramatic gasp before he can hit her. “Well shove a stick up my ass and call me a corndog, is that my old elevator buddy?”
Protag furrows his brow. “Yes? We talked about this like an hour ago.” His eyes widen. “Oh god,” he murmurs, “he’s forgetting things again.”
“Anyway,” Bok-su says, stopping whatever that was. “We’re needed in the green room. I hope you do well this round. I’m sure you’ll blow the judges away.” She snaps and exits with The Main Characterz.
The Side Characterz all look to Rody. “Did she really put lube on the stage?” Vince asks, monotone. Rody nods. Vince groans. “That’s so petty. We could have cracked a skull if we fell. That’s so irresponsible.” Vince is a bit worked up over this. Most likely he’s embarrassed to be related to her.
“We gotta get back at her!” Bakugo shouts. “We should blow up their equipment. I’ll do it. I'll take one for the team. I’ll explode their equipment.”
“No! No explosions!” Forcas exclaims. “We still made it! We just need to perform to the best of our ability. That is justice enough.”
The Side Characterz complain and argue with Forcas, a lot of them were on board with blowing up their stuff. “Guys stop!” Rody yells at them. “Let’s just drop the issue, alright? Our next number is good, it’ll be fine. We’ll prove we’re better by being the bigger person.” The Side Characterz boo him. Rody did kind of want to blow up their things, but the manager books Vince gave him said to be professional and set a good example, even if it means being a buzzkill.
He gets their minds off of revenge plans by making them run the next number. Rody can hear the bands onstage. All of them pumped the quality way up for this round, which is good because The Side Characterz also did that. This time they’re up right after The Main Characterz.
Rody watches The Main Characterz perform while The Side Characterz prep in the green room. Surprise surprise, they’re good again. Their song is about partying on beaches and checking out all the hot babes or something. They finish and the applause follows. The host calls up The Side Characterz as The Main Characterz exit. Rody gives his band encouraging fist bumps when they walk past. He acts on autopilot, giving a fist bump to someone who isn’t a Side Character.
Augustine watches where The Main Characterz went. He looks back at Rody, fidgeting with his jacket. “Rody, Bok-su’s doing it again.”
Oh great, another warning. “Geez, did she cover the stage in lube again?”
“Well, kinda,” Augustine says, looking away, “if the lube was under the stage and also a bomb.”
WHAT? “THERE’S A BOMB UNDER THE STAGE?!?!?!”
“Yeah, she had us plant it there. I don’t know if it's a real bomb or what, but, uh, y’know. I was worried Winnie might get hurt.”
“No shit he’s gonna get hurt!” Rody frantically searches for anything that could help. Lucky for him, there are some wire cutters sitting on top of the backstage lightbox. Augustine shows him how to get below the stage and gives him directions to the bomb. The entire time he can hear The Side Characterz singing their new song “Party Girl.”
“Oooh baby, let's party girl, you party girl, girl, you’re a party girl, girl, I can party with you girl, we can party girl.”
It's claustrophobic beneath the stage. Rody crawls to the middle where the bomb is located. But when he gets there, the timer only has thirty seconds left! Worse than that, there are two wires. Cutting one will disable the bomb, but the other will set it off immediately. The question is, should Rody cut the red wire or the green wire? Panic surges through him.
Twenty five seconds, what to do! In movies the right wire is the red wire, so he should cut that one. But what if Bok-su has watched movies before? She might have made the right wire the green one so Rody would get confused.
Twenty seconds, he’s running out of time! Rody likes the color green more, so he’s inclined to cut the green wire, but he wants to cut the red wire so the green can stay intact.
Fifteen seconds, oh god they’re all gonna die! Did Bok-su choose which is the right wire or is it selected at the bomb factory? This is surely a mass produced bomb, so what would the factory pick?
Ten seconds, just pick a color! Bomb is like red because red bad, right? So should he cut the red wire, or is the red wire the bad wire?
Five seconds, gut instinct. Rody shuts his eyes and snips. He braces for impact. Nothing happens. He slowly peeks at the bomb. The timer is stopped at two seconds. The red wire is cut. He did it. Everyone is still alive. Rody is def putting it all on red next time he hits the casino.
Rody squirms back up, carefully taking the bomb with him. The Side Characterz finish their song. From the parts Rody got to hear, they seemed to do well. They’re pumped as the other bands walk out on stage for the round two results.
“You know what time it is, everybody!” The host announces. “It’s the end of round two. Inside this envelope are the final results. Are you ready?” The crowd cheers wildly, audience members scream for their favorite bands. “Let’s open ‘er up!” The host tears the envelope open, pulling the thin card from inside. “The first band to make it to the finals is… drum roll please…” The crowd drum rolls. “...The Main Characterz!!” The Main Characterz shout excitedly. The crowd gives some half-hearted applause. Guess The Main Characterz aren’t super popular. Serves those attempted murderers right.
“And the band that will be joining them in the final battle…” The crowd is quiet, anticipating the outcome. “Isn’t this interesting,” the host murmurs under their breath, barely loud enough for the mic to pick up, “It’s The Side Characterz!” Yes!!! They actually have a shot at winning this! This is so awesome! The Side Characterz have a chance to be cool for the first time ever!!!!!
What does interesting mean? Does the host think they’re gonna fail or something? Or is it just because both bands are Characterz? It has to be super confusing from an outside perspective. “Woah, everyone, hold on!” The host says, waving they arms out for the audience’s attention. “I’ve just got word from the judges that we’re gonna have a swap for the finale! The Side Characterz will be going before The Main Characterz. After our next intermission, you’ll see the last performance from The Side Characterz.” The curtains close and The Side Characterz rush to Rody.
“Did you see us out there! It was so incredible!” Winnie gushes.
“We made it to the final round yo!” McCoy exclaims. “The Main Characterz got nothing on us!”
“As long as they don’t try something again like the last two times.” Rody shows them the bomb. “Bok-su put this under the stage during your last performance.”
“Is that a fucking bomb?!?” Vince blurts.
Bakugo yells, “But we were gonna blow them up! They beat us to it!”
“I think that’s against the rules,” Co-worker replies calmly.
“It’s against the law!!” Rody cries. “I was able to disable it, but who knows what they’re gonna try next? We have to be ready for anything. You guys stay here, I have some people to talk to.”
Rody heads off in search of The Main Characterz. He finds Angelica, Augustine, and June standing in the green room. “Do you know what Bok-su is going to try this round?” Rody asks desperately.
“I’m sorry, but we don’t know anything,” Angelica’s voice is sympathetic, with hints of fear.
Augustine scratches the back of his head. “Bok-su found out we helped you last time. She wouldn’t tell us anything.”
Rody can see the win slipping away. Hell, he can see the band dying, or worse. If he can’t stop Bok-su, she could do something horrible. All this for a petty sibling rivalry? Rody feels lucky he’s an only child. But man, how are they gonna make it out of this one? “Just because we don’t know what’s happening doesn’t mean nobody does,” June says comfortingly. Rody’s distress must have been obvious. “Bok-su wouldn’t tell us, but you could try asking Protag or Eddie. They might help you.”
Right, the other band members! One of them has to let something slip! Rody thanks the three of them for their help and runs out. He checks stage left, stage right, the waiting area, the green room, but nothing. The curtains open again, fuck! He hasn’t figured out what Bok-su’s gonna do.
“Hey hey band lovers! It’s me, your host! Now before we hear our last number from The Side Characterz, let's hear a word from our judges on who they think is gonna win!” Oh hell yeah, extra time! This is great, now Rody can search the back backstage.
It’s dark and scary back here. Rody starts to regret his decision. But then, he notices Eddie leaning against a door. Rody dashes up to him. “Eddie!!” Rody grabs Eddie’s shoulders and shakes him for emphasis. “Do you know what Bok-su is planning on doing this round? She tried to kill the band last time!”
Eddie is weirded out by this. “Uh,” he mutters, uncomfortable. Eddie avoids Rody's frenzied gaze, instead suspiciously looking at the door. Rody gets the thought that maybe he should check what’s happening in that room. But his question is answered when Bok-su slips out of the room.
“UUUHRRRHRGRGRGRrRRHRH!!!!!!!!” Rody grunts/screams at Bok-su, pulling the bomb out and shoving it in her face. “WHAT WAS THE BOMB ABOUT?? WE MURDERING PEOPLE NOW????”
Bok-su chuckles dryly. “I never murdered anyone. It’s a dummy, dummy.” She flicks Rody's forehead. Rody flips the bomb over, seeing that it says ‘dummy bomb’ on the back. “It’s not even my bomb. It’s yours.” Another look shows that it actually says ‘Rody’s dummy bomb’.
Rody is dumbfounded. This has to be one of the evilest plans he’s ever heard of. He glares at Bok-su, acting as stern as he possibly can. “What are you doing this round?”
“Oh you’ll find out soon enough.” She leans against Eddie, blocking the door entirely. “You should hurry along, The Side Characterz are on very soon. Leave me and my brother alone to prepare for our performance.” She guides Eddie away.
Now what? Rody hasn’t figured out Bok-su’s plan. He crumples to the ground and puts his face in his hands. It's all over. The Side Characterz are going to lose and they’re gonna be kicked out of France. Co-worker’s voice is the only thing he can hear. “Well wrap me around a dick and call me a condom!” Wait, Co-worker only says that when he sees…
“Protag!” Rody shouts, racing up to them. “Do you know what Bok-su is doing this round?”
“I’m not supposed to tell you.” Protag says, glancing around.
“Please! You have to help! Otherwise, uh,” he pulls Co-worker’s tie, “Co-worker might get hurt. You guys are friends, right?”
Protag solemnly shakes his head. “Worse.”
“Right well, he has to go anyway. Prep for the finale.” Rody shoves Co-worker away. “Please? You can’t like Bok-su that much, right?”
Protag considers this. He sighs, “Fine, I’ll tell you.” Rody jumps in the air and clicks his heels. Protag rests his hand against his chin, thinking. “I don’t know what Eddie and Bok-su did, but it was my job to steal your music. I don’t know where it ended up. I passed it off to Bok-su after I took it from the green room.” Damn, Rody should’ve expected that from the fact they’ve been playing the music out of a boombox that they set next to the side of the stage.
“Do you know where it might be?” Rody asks.
“It might be under the stage again. Bok-su was proud of that hiding spot.”
Rody thanks Protag and crawls back beneath the stage. “Now, let’s give it up for The Side Characterz!!” The host announces. FUCK!!!! The boombox isn’t down here, and now The Side Characterz have to perform without music!
Onstage, The Side Characterz were already stressed. “Where is Forcas?” Bakugo whispers loudly, alone in the front.
Winnie whispers back, distraught, “We couldn’t find him! No one has seen him since last round!”
“But he’s our best singer, what can we do without him?” McCoy anxiously sets up the mic.
“We’ll go on as planned. I’ll be the lead singer.” Co-worker takes the mic and stands in front.
“Oh great, we’re saved,” Vince says sarcastically. The lights come up and the crowd cheers. The Side Characterz stand frozen, waiting for the music. After a moment of silence, Winnie sneaks off to check the problem. Winnie quickly returns, gesturing for the band to huddle up.
“It’s gone!! Our boombox is gone!!” Winnie cries quietly. “What do we do now?” The Side Characterz think. Surprisingly, Co-worker is the first to come up with an idea.
“I have a plan! Remember our instruments? I think Rody brought them, we can still perform!” Co-worker exclaims.
“But we don’t know how to play any of our new songs!” Bakugo retorts. “And our old songs are ass!”
Co-worker grins devilishly. “Leave that to me. Winnie, you set up the keyboard and the drumset. Vince and McCoy, you’re with me. Bakugo… you just be Bakugo.” He puts his hand in the middle and the rest of The Side Characterz follow suit. “3… 2… 1…”
“SIDE CHARACTERZ!!!!!!!”
They all head to their battle stations. Winnie races to the waiting area for the instruments while Co-worker leads Vince and McCoy backstage. “For this plan to work, you’ll need to pick up some new instruments.” He grabs Rody’s acoustic guitar and its girlfriend, the bass. “Remember when we watched School of Rock, classic 2003 movie where that kid who played the cello could play the bass because they’re kind of similar instruments? That could be Vince!” He hands Vince the bass. “And a ukulele is just a small guitar anyway.” He hands McCoy the acoustic guitar.
McCoy is skeptical. “I don’t think that’s how it works, mate. Especially for Vince. Just because he can play the cello doesn’t mean he can play bass-” McCoy is interrupted by Vince playing the craziest bass line. He’s so talented and it sounds super cool and good, the exact kind of base line you can’t describe in text. Just trust that it is absolutely terrifically good. “I- I take it back.” McCoy says, shocked.
They return to the stage, where Bakugo has been hyping up the crowd. “Hey extras! Are you ready to have your heads exploded?” The crowd cheers wildly. “This last song from The Side Characterz is gonna kill you! You’re gonna die and come back to life, that’s how good it’s gonna be! And you're gonna wish we uploaded songs to spotify, or apple music or something, but we don’t! You gotta find us in the wild if you’re a true fan!” Winnie taps him and points to drums. “Remember that extras! And judges! Not extras.” He clarifies (for All Might.)
Rody is just about free from underneath the stage. He doesn’t have enough time to find the boombox. If The Side Characterz lose, it’ll all be his fault. And they surely will without music. Rody accepts defeat… until he hears them play.
Three harsh notes from the keyboard kick off the song. The drums tap out a beat while the guitar does some weird notes. A funky base line punctuates the song. The song isn’t familiar, Rody hasn’t heard them play it before. Where is Forcas? And since when did they play guitar and bass? At least the audience seems to like it.
That’s when Co-worker starts to sing. “Oh, baby, baby, how was I supposed to know that something wasn’t right, here?” Wait a minute… “Oh, baby, baby, I shouldn’t have let you go and now you’re out of sight, yeah.” Rody’s heard this song before. The other band members start to harmonize along with Co-worker. “Show me how you want it to be. Tell me baby, ‘cause I need to know, now, Oh, because!” Is this …Baby One More Time by Britney Spears?!? “My loneliness is killing me!” Winnie does the backup singing, “And I!” The other four sing the main part, “I must confess I still believe!” Winnie is killing the high notes, “Still believe!” The other four have a good harmony going, “When I’m not with you I lose my mind.” All five of them sing together, “Give me a siiiiiiign. Hit me baby one more time!”
Rody smiles. The band has this handled. He focuses on finding the music, and Forcas. He goes back to the door where Eddie and Bok-su were before. He opens the door and sees Forcas lying on the floor, reading last month’s edition of Scales: Music is real.
“Forcas!” Rody yells. Forcas looks up at him. “What are you doing back here?! You’re supposed to be onstage!”
Forcas just kind of stares at him. “Uhhh… The Main Characterz said they were going first. And that I should wait here.”
“Why would you listen? Obviously it was a trap!”
“They were… very convincing?” Forcas quickly changes the subject. “Look, it’s the boombox!” He picks up the boombox. “Guess this also needs to be onstage.” So The Main Characterz hid both of them in the same room. The room that Rody saw and knew they were using. The room he forgot to check until now. Great.
Rody pulls Forcas up. “We might as well catch the end of the song.” They head back just as The Side Characterz finish with one last “Hit me baby one more time.” The crowd absolutely loses it. Britney never fails. The band comes off with their instruments. They’re relieved to have made it through the last song, even if they just barely got it together.
“You were amazing out there! Nice save with the music.” Rody is still ashamed he couldn’t help things go according to plan.
Winnie sets his keyboard on the ground. “The Main Characterz are very petty.” He states. “They kidnapped our lead singer and our music! This is a new low.”
The Main Characterz pass them walking to the stage. Bok-su grins evilly. “What are you smiling at? Damn extra!” Bakugo shouts. “We gotta get back at them. They can’t just go out there and perform like normal after sabotaging us!” Bakugo holds his hand out to the stage. “We should blow them up!”
Forcas moves Bakugo’s arm away. “No explosions.” He carefully studies The Main Characterz. “They’re definitely too smug. We should get back at them.” He decides. “But we should do it effectively. Something that will ruin their performance.”
Co-worker speaks up. “We could pour a large amount of slime on them. Then they wouldn’t be able to dance. And,” he pulls glue, baking soda, activator, and thirteen bottles of green food coloring from his jacket, “we already have all the ingredients.”
“Why did you bring that stuff brah?” McCoy asks.
“I like to carry helpful items on my person, just in case.” He passes out the supplies. Vince grabs large plastic containers that are always backstage (always) and they start mixing, baby! They pull the containers up to the rafters. Bok-su is being super extra down there. She pulls her heavy coat off to reveal a smaller black jacket. Riveting. As the song reaches its climax, she stands right below the target area.
SPLAT!!! The slime hits Bok-su. She freezes like a deer in headlights. The audience gives a collective “oooooh.” The rest of the band stops, unsure what to do. The Side Characterz snicker to themselves and sneak back down.
The music stops, its time cut short. The host steps out, avoiding the slime puddle. “Ok, well,” he says, examining The Main Characterz cautiously. “That was The Main Characterz everybody!” The audience applauds out of pity. “Let’s give our judges a moment to think and-” All Might swiftly delivers the results letter to the host before returning to his seat. “Nevermind, looks like they have made their decision. Side Characterz, join us out here!” The Side Characterz step out onto the stage.
“We’ve seen some excellent bands perform for us tonight. It’s been rough seeing some crowd favorites get sent home. I’d give first place to everyone if I could, but there can only be one winner! The winner will receive a cash prize and a spot on the cover of Scales: Music is real! But which band will it be? Who will take home first place? Let’s see what our judges say.”
The host opens the final envelope. “First place of this year's battle of the bands goes to…” The Side Characterz cross their fingers, nervously awaiting the announcement. The Main Characterz do the same. The seconds stretch out. The audience is silent. Everyone holds their breath. The atmosphere is heavy. This is it. Make or break. Now or never.
“...The Side Characterz!” Holy shit. It takes a second for the news to process. Rody only realizes what it means when he hears the room erupt with applause. They won. They actually won! Onstage, the band cheers. Forcas and Co-worker chest bump. Winnie jumps up and hugs McCoy, toppling both of them to the ground. Bakugo is trying to get All Might to sign his forehead.
The Main Characterz clap politely, masking how upset they are. Bok-su moves to shake Vince’s hand. The host's voice booms, “Remember to pick up a copy of the next edition of Scales: Music is real featuring The Side Characterz! Thank you all for coming, and we'll see you again next year!”
The curtains close and Rody rushes out to join the band. “You did it!” The Side Characterz are giddy. This is the first time anything cool has happened to them. Rody gives many high fives, fist bumps, chest bumps, and a hug (for Winnie.)
“All Might wanted my signature!” Bakugo gushes, his forehead covered in marker. “I signed his bicep!”
Forcas rubs the back of his neck. “I'm sorry I couldn’t sing in the last round. I should've been there. I wish I could have helped more.”
"But you did help!” Winnie says. “You were so good at singing for the first two rounds! We would have lost without you!”
Co-worker speaks up. “We would have lost without Rody too. He was the one who stopped The Main Characterz’s traps. I can’t imagine what would happen if they succeed. We’d be toast if it wasn’t for you.” Co-worker lifts Rody up onto his shoulders. “Let’s give it up for France’s most dedicated manager!” The Side Characterz go crazy mode. A laugh slips from Rody’s mouth as he’s raised into the air. He surveys the band below him. He notices Vince is separate from the group, talking with Bok-su. Worry flicks across Rody’s mind. He squirms off of Co-worker’s shoulder and walks to them.
Vince speaks in hushed tones. His words are sharp. He grips Bok-su’s hand. Rody doesn’t hear what he says; he stops whispering when he sees Rody. Vince lets go of her hand. He straightens his posture and talks to Bok-su, ignoring Rody. “Well?” His eyes narrow, prompting her to speak.
She scowls, still intimidating even covered in slime. “You may have pulled it off today, Vincent. But our duel is not over. I’ll keep my word, you won’t see us again in France. We’ll meet again. You aren’t the only band on a world tour.” Bok-su nods behind her towards The Main Characterz. “You can make it without your music and your frontman, but what would you do without your precious manager?” She throws a hand out to Rody, a sly smile on her face. “Wouldn’t it be a shame if he couldn’t save you next time? If something were to happen to him?”
Vince gives Rody a quick look before returning his sight to Bok-su. “This isn’t about him.” He steps closer to Bok-su, away from Rody. “You’re a sore loser.” His fist is clenched at his side. “You’d better leave. They won’t want the runner-up staying for much longer.”
Bok-su’s face drops. She has the same glare as Vince, wide-eyed and piercing. For a moment they stare at one another. “Fine.” Bok-su backs off, falling in line with The Main Characterz. “I look forward to seeing you again. I've been working on a new song, just for you. The anthem of The Side Characterz defeat. The band that could have been. When we meet again I’ll sing it for you. I do hope you enjoy it.” She smirks, relishing her villain monologue. “You’re rising so fast. It’ll be quite a shame when you inevitably fall. But I suppose you’re used to that, aren’t you? With your restaurant?”
Vince raises his voice, shouting at Bok-su. “Leave!”
“This isn’t over,” she repeats. “We will see each other again. You can count on it.” With that, she turns on her heel and shuffles out of the building. The Main Characterz follow behind her.
Vince watches the door, as if expecting her to return. When she doesn’t, he lets out a breath and his stance relaxes. His fist unclenches. “Your sister’s pretty scary,” Rody says, trying to lighten the mood.
Vince doesn’t acknowledge Rody. Instead he glances around the room, looking at The Side Characterz, the judges table, the sticky slime spot on the floor. It’s unfocused, his mind is somewhere else. Rody clears his throat. Vince looks up, though seems more like he’s looking through Rody than at him. “Something wrong?” Rody asks.
Vince hesitates before shaking his head. “No. It’s nothing. I’m just tired.” He lingers for a moment, eyeing the door one last time. “We should go back with the others,” he murmurs. Vince walks toward the band, staring blankly at the ground. Rody chooses not to press him. He hurries after Vince.
The rest of The Side Characterz are in the middle of working on a contract with the magazine. They chatter amongst themselves, pushing Rody to the front. Rody reviews the contract with his manager eyes. Interviews, photoshoots, a full page poster! This looks sick as hell! There’s a bunch of legalese but it's boring and stupid.
Rody signs without fully understanding the contract. He should be more careful given the last contract he signed forced him to be a boy band manager (everyone’s worst nightmare.) Rody doesn’t think about this though because it will all work out anyway trust. The Side Characterz also sign the contract. And they get the prize money hell yeah!!!!
The magazine officials take the contracts and schedule a date. “You know what this means, boys?” Forcas announces. “We’re gonna be popular enough to justify going on a world tour!” The Side Characterz cheer and scream and shit. “And,” Forcas continues. The band hangs on his words, waiting excitedly. “With the money…” Forcas is dragging this out for too long. “We…” Put the fries in the bag! “...Can afford a hotel with furniture!” Everyone freaks the fart out again!! Yaaaaaaayyy!!!!!!!
The Side Characterz skip around and are joyful and jolly. Vince even seems to be feeling better. Things are looking up for The Side Characterz. But if what Bok-su said is true, things might be turning south soon. If something went wrong, what would happen to the band? What would happen to Rody? Are The Side Characterz going to break up before the end of the year? Pfft, nah! That would never happen, duh. Don’t be an idiot, Rody. He chastises himself. Everything will be ok forever. Or at least for now.

Chapter Text

“Winnie, we have to go.” Rody gently tugs Winnie from the door. “We’re gonna miss check out.” The Side Characterz stand in a half-circle around them. The luggage is packed away, ready to be taken to the new hotel. They’re waiting in the hallway.
“I know, it’s just…” Winnie places a hand on the door, misty-eyed. “There are so many memories here. It feels like we’re losing a member of the band.” He rests his head against the door. “Room 203,” his voice cracks.
“I can’t believe we never got to switch rooms,” Bakugo mutters.
Forcas rubs his forehead. “We need to get to the hotel. Just let the room go.”
“I’m almost done!” Winnie clears his throat. He begins to sing softly. “Oh hotel room~”
Vince interrupts him. “Singers are the worst,” he groans.
“I’ve got this!” Co-worker swiftly grabs Winnie and slings him over his shoulder. “We can go now.” They check out at the lobby and make it to the parking lot.
“How are we supposed to get to the other hotel?” McCoy asks. “We don’t have a car.”
Rody gets a freaky evil look on his face. “Never fear, I have the perfect solution!” He points at the bike rack. “Behold! The Side Characterz new mode of transportation! I bought it with the tip money I made from working at Vince’s restaurant.”
Bakugo makes a disgusted face. “What the hell is that?”
“A bicycle built for six.” The bicycle is chained at every point on the bike rack. It's a jaundice yellow and the seats look super uncomfortable. “I also bought helmets for everyone. You're welcome.”
The Side Characterz glance nervously at each other. “Is that thing safe?” asks Forcas.
“Of course it is!” Rody passes Forcas his helmet. “I got the best my money could get!”
There's a loud clattering noise as the bike topples off of the rack. Vince whispers to Bakugo, “He didn't make a lot of tips.”
The bike creaks and shudders when they sit down. Forcas grimaces. “Ok, well this is a bicycle for six, so Rody will just have to run along next to us.”
Bakugo passes Rody a helmet. “Safety first.”
Rody holds it in his hands. “I don’t need this if I’m not on the bike.”
“He’s trying to get out of wearing it,” Winnie tells Rody. “You really should wear it, Bakugo. The bike is more likely to tip over with the amount of people we have on it. You could get hurt.”
“Hurt?” Bakugo laughs. “I won’t get hurt. Trust me, I don’t need that thing.”
“He doesn’t want to mess up his hair,” Co-worker snickers.
“We’re in a boyband, of course I don’t want to mess up my hair! It’s part of my image.”
Co-worker smirks. “Sure it is.”
“Let's get moving, boys!” Forcas yells. “On my count! One, two, three!” The band begins to pedal very slowly. Forcas is yelling encouraging words from the front of the bike, but it only serves to make them slower. Rody has time to take all their luggage to the new hotel. He’s faster than them walking.
“It’s going to take forever to get to the hotel,” Vince complains. If forever was thirty-two minutes, Vince would be correct. The new hotel isn’t the fanciest place in France, but it's certainly an improvement over the old one. The person at the front desk is kind and isn’t weirded out by a whole boy band sharing a room. She even looks at them, which is more than the old staff ever did. This time they’re in room 307. The Side Characterz all pile into one elevator and ride up to the third floor.
Rody slides the key in the lock. “Sorry we couldn’t get a bigger room. There wasn’t enough money for it.” It’s one room, except for the bathroom. There’s a kitchenette with a mini fridge and appliances, along with a small round table and two uncomfortable chairs. A dresser sits against the wall beneath a mounted TV. There’s even a sliding door with a real balcony!
“The hotel has a pool!” McCoy yells from the balcony, gazing down at the ground below. The fact that there’s even this much furniture is luxurious for The Side Characterz. But Rody is hesitant about the main feature of the room. Sure, he’s excited to have all the furniture, but there is one thing he wishes that he could’ve changed.
Forcas says the words Rody’s been afraid of. “How are we going to deal with the sleeping situation? After all, there is only one bed.”
“Well, it’s better than the last hotel when there was only NONE bed!” Co-worker jokes. Everyone stares at him blankly. “Get it? Cuz he said… there’s only…” Co-worker trails off. He hangs his head in shame.
Rody is not that big of an idiot. He knows that, logically speaking, seven people cannot all fit into one bed. It’s just a queen bed, so at most they could fit three people. But knowing The Side Characterz, they wouldn’t want to share the bed with two other boy band members. From the looks they give each other, they don’t even want to share the bed with one other person.
Rody thinks back on his extensive manager training. Conflict is on the horizon, tonight there will be a fight over who sleeps in the bed. That would be bad. So how does he resolve this potential conflict? That’s when his phone buzzes in his pocket. It’s an email from the address [email protected]. The subject line is titled: Tomorrow’s interview. An imaginary light bulb clicks on in Rody’s brain.
“Say guys, how about whoever does the best at the magazine interview tomorrow gets to sleep in the bed?” Rody proposes to the group. They seem intrigued. “Whoever gives the best answers, has the hottest photos, and butters up the interviewer the most will get the comfort of sleeping in a real bed.”
“We just had a competition,” Winnie complains. “I’m tired of them.”
McCoy elbows him. “Tired enough to sleep on the floor?”
Winnie ponders. “...I guess not.”
“I’ve done plenty of interviews before,” Bakugo says. “I’m a pro at them. The rest of you extras shouldn’t even bother.”
Co-worker scoffs. “I’ve also interviewed before.”
Forcas frowns. “Is there any other way to do this? Like one without fighting?”
“You’re so boring, brah,” McCoy tells him. “You always try to stop everything fun. You aren’t our dad, yo.”
Forcas gasps, clutching his chest as if McCoy punched him in the stomach. “B-boring?” He falls to the floor, his nails scraping against the carpet. “I’m not…” He stares at the floor. A perfect shiny tear rolls down his cheek. “When we were…” he murmurs to himself. The other Side Characterz exchange glances. “I have been boring,” he says with newfound clarity. He looks up to the band. “I used to be fun!”
“O-ok??” Co-worker utters. “We believe you man.”
Forcas stands, steeling himself. “Fine,” he says after a moment. “If it’s a competition you want, you can have one.” He grins sinisterly. “But I’ll be giving it my all. That bed is as good as mine!”
The others explode into arguments, each asserting his own skill. Vince stands to the side, silently watching them. Guess he still sleeps in his apartment. He’s made it clear he won’t be participating. That’s a shame because Rody was rooting for him to win, given he’d already had interview experience. Yeah, he read that catalogue interview, the one where Vince’s photo is super hot! AWOOGA!!!!
Rody is too busy patting himself on the back for getting the boys excited for the interview that he doesn’t realize he’s a stupid dumbass manager. In trying to resolve one conflict, he made another! Oh Rody, you scamp!! Hope that doesn’t come to bite him in the butt!!!
Rody shouts out, “Guys!” They don’t hear him and keep talking. “GUYS!!!” He shouts, louder. They still don’t respond. Time to pull out the big guns. “If you can hear me, clap once!” They don’t clap. Vince claps, but Rody doesn’t need to look at him to know he’s mocking him. At least Vince’s clap got the attention of some of them. “I’ll wait.” Rody crosses his arm and turns up his nose. They all quiet down eventually, from peer example.
Rody clears his throat. “Thank you. Now, each of you wants to win, right?” The Side Characterz cheer affirmatively. “Then you’ve got to put in the prep work! I, Rody Lamoree, your manager, will train you on how to give the perfect interview! For now, I’m not your friend. I’m an interviewer, who wants to see you fail!” His eyes are cold, serious. “Not all of you will survive. Are you ready for the most intense interview of all time?”
“Yes Rody sir!” They say in unison. Their backs are straight, they’re standing in a line, and they do what Rody says. Good. But there’s still light in their eyes. They’re still hopeful. Naive. That’ll be fixed.
“First,” Rody paces in front of the line, “if the interviewer asks what you would do if you weren’t in a boyband, what would you say?” He spins and points at Co-worker.
Co-worker thinks long and hard. “I’d be working at my father’s company!”
“Wrong!” Rody gets up in Co-worker’s face. “That isn’t something a hot member of a boyband does! Do you want the magazine to say you aren’t fun and you’re only interested in office jobs?”
Rody’s breath is hot and smelly. Co-worker recoils, “No, of course not!”
“That’s right. Next time say that you’d be a professional alpine skier.” Rody backs away to Co-worker’s relief.
“Alpine skiing?”
“Of course,” Rody says, back facing away from the band. “It’s common enough for people to know, but uncommon enough for you to seem unique. Any problem with that?”
“Ohhhhhh ok.”
“So, Bakugo,” Rody says, “if they ask you your favorite part of being in the band, what would you say?”
He rubs his chin, thinking. “Probably the dancing. I'm waaaaaaay better at dancing than those extras. They don't even compare to The Bakugo!!!!!!!”
“AANNNNCCK,” Rody says, in an attempt to sound like the incorrect buzzer on a game show. “Interviewers don't want to hear that you think you are better than the rest of the band! You're supposed to all be friends!! You like the other Side Characterz, don't you?”
“I can't say I do.”
Rody groans. “Bakugo I know your ass loves lying. I can tell. Just say that your favorite part is drumming because you like to support the song and in turn support your buddies, got it?”
“Ugggghhh fine.”
Rody moves on. “Forcas, how would you describe The Side Characterz?”
“Ooh that’s hard.” Forcas gives it a big fat think. “We’re a boyband with members from all over the globe. We all channel our unique cultures and experiences into our music, working together to create a blend of sound that connects with the listener. Our songs are stories, they tell of love and heartbreak, happiness and sorrow, the little things in life that really-”
“Snnhhonk!” Rody snores. “Oh sorry, you were going on for so long I must’ve dozed off! Keep your answers short; we want stuff that’ll easily fit into magazine blurbs and captions. That goes for everyone!”
Rody continues drilling them tirelessly. Favorite songs, best moments from the tour, everyone’s role in the band, all of it perfectly rehearsed. “I’m going back to the restaurant,” Vince tells them in the middle of their training, “considering I’m not doing anything here.”
Rody gasps. “No, no! Vince!” He runs to the hallway, where Vince was leaving. “Not you! Anyone but you!” He throws his arms around Vince. “Don’t die on me, damnit! You have so much to live for!” Rody sinks down, holding Vince’s ankles. “It should have been me! It should have been me!!!”
Vince slips his legs out of Rody’s grip. “Stop doing this shit.”
“You’re no fun.”
“See you tomorrow for the interview.”
“VINCE!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!” Vince leaves without acknowledging Rody. Rody steps back into the hotel room. “Vince…” he shudders, “...is no longer with us.” The Side Characterz gasp, grief-stricken. “You have to give it your all at the interview tomorrow. For Vince!”
“For Vince!” The band cheers, reinvigorated. They finish their training with newfound confidence. They easily crush every question Rody throws at them.
Rody nods once, satisfied. “I think you’re ready.” He pulls his phone out and emails Scales. A confirmation, The Side Characterz will be there.
The Side Characterz settle in for the night. They shower, brush their teeth, do their skincare routines, etc. They all stand around, watching FNAF Jeopardy. “So who gets the bed tonight?” Co-worker inquires. “I was thinking me.”
“I get the bed.” Rody says, climbing in. He cuts off the band’s protests, “I trained you people all day! Besides, I’m not competing! I’m simply a neutral party enjoying the bed before the victor takes it tomorrow. And one more night on the floor will kill my back.” Can’t argue with sound logic! The band sleeps on the floor while Rody experiences the best sleep he’s had since he took on his exciting new career.
They head out the next morning. “Remember to keep things civil. This is a friendly competition,” Rody reminds them.
The headquarters for the magazine isn’t very large, it's the fourth floor of an office complex. There are a few desks where people type articles, edit photos, and format pages. To the left, an area is cornered off for taking pictures. Co-worker has been sweating bullets since they stepped in. Office jobs are bad.
A conventionally attractive man in a business suit walks up to them. “Hello! Welcome to the headquarters of Scales: Music is real. The entire magazine is developed right here. We cover everything musical, new releases, occasional gossip and libel, and,” he winks at them, “interviews with the newest upcoming bands!”
Rody shakes his hand. “Hello, my name is Rody. I’m the manager for The Side Characterz.”
The man smiles brightly. “We’re so happy to have you! I’m Johnny Sparkle, editor-in-chief for Scales. I’ll be in charge of everything you’ll be involved with today, so if you need anything come to me.”
“Thank you so much for hosting us!” McCoy says brightly. Buttering up starts early.
“Of course!” He ushers them to the photo area. “We’ll start with pictures while our camera crew is still here. We have a few clothing pieces for you to play around with. Let loose and have some fun with it! But first,” some staff members sit at a table near the back, “you’ll need some makeup. The lights are bright and your faces will get washed out otherwise.”
“I’m ok with that!” Co-worker plops into a makeup chair. “Make me hot!”
Bakugo sits next to him. “Make me hotter!” The makeup artists get to work, making those pretty faces prettier. Johnny leaves, something about a formatting crisis on page 13. The head photographer asks Rody a few questions about the band.
“Do NOT take those bandages off!!!!” Forcas shouts, grabbing the bandages from his artist’s hand. He hides his face and wraps his eye tightly. “Sorry,” he says shortly after. “I didn’t mean to shout. They’re part of my image.” He turns back, seriously upset. “Really, I shouldn’t have yelled. I’m so sorry.” The makeup artist mutters something Rody doesn’t catch. Forcas want that bed like crazy damn.
It’s a mostly natural look, but with an accent on their eyes. Vince has some killer eyeliner going on. It makes him look like a bad boy, but if bad boys were divalicious! Winnie gets some extra blush on his cheeks and McCoy’s makeup is more natural than the rest. Rody bribes the photographer to take headshots of The Side Characterz. W manager move from The Rodster.
They take several group photos. Most of them are classic boyband pictures, showcasing each member’s personality through their body language. Vince poses with various kitchen equipment; pots, pans, a knife, always keeping his expression rigid and mysterious. The rest of the members get similar treatment with their props, background, and lighting.
The costuming is fire as well, each Side Character getting their own color. McCoy gets red, Bakugo orange, Co-worker yellow, Winnie light blue, Vince black, and Forcas gets some dark blue/indigo type thing. The colors are incorporated in their outfits, standing out from the white that makes up the rest of their outfits.
They also get their own kind of hand hearts (heart shapes you make with your hands). The hearts were Rody’s idea. They get together for a group photo, Winnie kneeling in the front, aegyo hearts pressed against his cheeks. McCoy is seated to the right of him, his index and middle fingers outstretched to form a heart. Forcas kneels in the middle, arms above him creating a large heart around his head. Vince stands at the left of Forcas with the gen X hand heart, his fingers together at the top, thumbs making the bottom of the heart. Co-worker stands opposite of Vince, his ring and pinkie finger forming his heart with the rest of his fingers fanned out around the heart. Bakugo stands center, turning his back to the band, his thumb and index finger in a heart over his shoulder.
The rest of their photos are simple. They toss Winnie in the air like a cheerleader. They get a jumpshot. The boys lie on their backs, arms outstretched to form a big heart from above (the magazine is eating the hearts up). They each get a rose in their color to pose with as they please. Rody makes a mental note to use their colors more often because it’s pretty awesome.
The Side Characterz are given a short break before the interview starts. “Must be a slow news day with the amount of photos they took of us,” McCoy says.
“They probably thought we were so cool and hot they needed every photo they could get,” Co-worker suggests.
Vince hangs his magazine provided leather jacket back on its hanger. “Weren’t you supposed to be competing? It doesn’t seem like any of you even want the bed.”
“Wrong!” Bakugo exclaims. “I crushed McCoy! Who got the better lighting in 78% of the photos? Me!”
McCoy sticks his tongue out at Bakugo. “You play dirty, man. You weren’t supposed to elbow me out of the way.”
“I was securing my place!” Bakugo points to himself, smug. “Its the results that matter, not the methods.”
“Speaking of,” Forcas looks expectantly at Rody, “what are the results so far? Who's in the lead?”
“The photos turned out great for all of you,” Rody responds. “I’d say it’s anyone’s game.”
Winnie smiles, hope shining in his eyes. “So the interviews are the important part.”
“Good luck everyone!” Rody announces. “Remember, keep it civil. Right, Bakugo?” He stresses Bakugo’s name.
“Yeah, yeah. Civil. Friendly competition.” Bakugo grins creepy evil-style.
Johnny Sparkle walks over to them. “Are we all ready for the interviews now?” The Side Characterz follow Johnny to a small area with a couch and two chairs. He sits in the large chair across from the couch. “Please, make yourselves comfortable. Is there anything you’d like? Some water, perhaps?” The Side Characterz squeeze onto the couch. It isn’t built with six people in mind. Rody settles into a smaller chair next to Johnny. Some reporter lady brings them water bottles and Johnny opens his laptop.
“We’ll start with the individual interviews and then move onto the group interview.” Johnny types on his laptop and peers up at the band. “Who would like to go first?”
The Side Characterz jostle each other and nominate themselves. Johnny hesitates, clearly off put. Rody speaks to him, “Let Vince go first.” Vince as the neutral party should set an example for the others.
“This won’t go very long. The questions are pretty straightforward,” Johnny reassures Vince. “What’s your name?”
“My name is Vincent Charbonneau,” Vince answers.
“What role do you play in the band?”
“I’m the bad boy,” Vince says, defeat seeping from his voice. “I can also play the cello.”
“Okay,” Johnny types the answers onto the laptop, “we just need a quick little something special about you. Something that’ll help you stick in the reader’s minds. It can be anything, hobbies, skills, talents, as long as it’s distinctive.”
Vince thinks. “I run my own restaurant,” is what he settles on. Duh!! What else is he ever gonna talk about. Johnny prompts him to continue. “It’s called La Gueule de Saturne. Our menu changes each day, so there’s always something new to try. The menu is intended for a more refined palette. Sometimes I let the band play. Those nights are often popular.”
“Perfect!” Johnny beams. He clicks around, saving Vince’s answers. “Who’s up next?”
The Side Characterz pick up again with their shouting. “I’m from Australia!" McCoy shouts over everyone.
Johnny points to McCoy. “That’s good. What’s your name?”
The rest of the band quiets, mostly due to the glare Rody shoots at them. “I’m McCoy. I’m the ukulele playing heartthrob, as you can clearly see.” He displays his abs, comparing them to the less muscular Side Characterz. “And I’m Australian."
“Not French?”
“No sir, not many of us are. Vince is the only French band member.”
“Interesting,” Johnny hums, noting it in his document. “Could the rest of you include where you’re from in your introductions? It’ll be faster that way.”
McCoy continues with his interesting fact. “Back home, I worked as a lifeguard. I love spending my time at the beach, swimming, surfing, anything on the ocean. I’ve been to some of the beaches here, but none of them will top Australia's.”
“Thank you,” Johnny says. “Next?”
Winnie answers first. “My name is Winnie and I’m from Canada. I’m the maknae of our group, and I play piano. For something interesting…” he pauses for a moment. “I play hockey?” He glances at Johnny, who seems uninterested. He then looks to Rody, who gives a gesture that he hopes Winnie can interpret, because he’s really just moving his hands however. “Actually, hockey isn’t my main sport. I do play hockey, but more often I alpine ski.”
Co-worker gasps dramatically, clutching his heart. He mouths to Winnie, “That was my line!”
Johnny smiles. “That’s great! Anything else about it?”
Winnie starts pulling shit from his ass. “It’s super fun. The cold isn’t so bad if you have a coat on, and it makes for an incredible thrill. I’ve been to some of the best ski mountains in Canada. I’ve even won a few competitions!”
Johnny believes Winnie’s lie and calls for the next band member. Forcas is up. “I’m from a lot of places,” he hedges. “My name is Forcas, I’m the lead singer and frontman of The Side Characterz. My passion is singing.” Forcas casts a sideways glance to Bakugo. “My favorite part of being in the band is singing, because it allows me to support the song. And that lets me support the rest of the band with their instruments and voices too.”
“That’s very kind of you to say.” Johnny puts Forcas’s answer in a special box on his document.
Bakugo’s eyes have a crazy fire in them. He hisses at Forcas, “I was supposed to say that about drumming! It doesn’t even make sense with singing!” Forcas waggles his finger at Bakugo. Bakugo winds up a big fat punch.
Co-worker interrupts his attack. “It’s my turn everyone!” Bakugo will be violent again one day, never fear. “My name is Clayton Cox, and I used to have it all,” Co-worker says, slipping into a dramatic retelling of his past. “My father is a CEO. His company makes billions of dollars a year. I was the hotshot, the dreamer, starry-eyed and hopeful. But my father didn’t believe I’d ever make it in the real world. So he sent me to work at his company, saddled with pointless busywork. I made an ass ton of money though.” He flashes his expensive watch.
“Joining The Side Characterz was my way to finally be myself after all those years,” Co-worker continues. “I took all my money (one million euros btw) and decided to make myself someone! And that someone is a lovable idiot in a boy band!”
“Very inspiring, Clayton!” Oh no, he fooled Johnny! Rody will have to correct that before the magazine comes out. “Last is Bakugo, correct?”
“That’s me,” Bakugo lifts his hand up. “My life is very different from that of the average person, in a way an extra like you wouldn’t understand.” Bakugo’s flashback is much more dramatic than Co-worker’s. “Imagine a boy, headstrong, intelligent, incredibly handsome. He’s fifteen, and he thinks he has his whole life figured out. But BAM! Life hits him, and it hits him hard. Suddenly he isn’t so strong any more. He feels trapped. Stuck. He sees his friends move on, get married, do something with their lives. And sure, he’s a kickass cool guy, but he’s missing something. So ten years later when a boy band shows up and promises something new, he takes that opportunity. And he won’t let it fail.”
“That was beautiful, Bakugo.” Johnny finishes typing the document. “We’ll be moving onto the group interview shortly. Why don’t we take a break?” Johnny dismisses himself.
“You made that shit up!” Co-worker shouts at Bakugo. “You were such an egotistical asshole when we met you!”
Bakugo scoffs. “Rody said I could lie! And you lied too!”
“Yeah but it made me sound cooler. You just ripped me off!”
“Nuh uh! I can’t rip off my own life story!”
“You can if you make it up!”
“GRRRRRaAAAAaAAHHHHH!!!!” Bakugo pounces on Co-worker. “Shut up!” Yes, crash out anger issues king!
“Get off of each other!” Forcas shouts, ripping the two of them apart.
Rody looks out at the rest of the floor. Some of the employees are staring at them. “You can’t fight like that, ok? You shouldn’t fight at all! Whatever happened to your best behavior?”
“He started it,” Bakugo points at Co-worker.
“Only because Winnie took alpine skiing!” Co-worker shouts.
“But my life is boring!” Winnie complains.
“The ladies love hockey. What are you talking about, dawg?” McCoy tells him.
“Stop, I don’t care!” Rody cries out. “We’re all gonna be nice or else I’ll set fire to the bed and we’ll spend the interview money on the bail for arson! Shut up and be good!” Rody doesn’t like being the bad guy, but they are on another level.
Johnny comes back, cautiously sitting back into his chair. “Hey, are we all good to do the interview?”
“Nice going, Bakugo,” Co-worker elbows him. “You scared Johnny.” Forcas restrains Bakugo from going full Great Explosion Murder God DynaMight on him. They sit politely and try to mend Johnny’s opinion of them.
“Let’s just get this over with, alright?” Johnny gets straight to the meat of the interview. “You recently won a battle of the bands. What was the competition like?”
“It was cheeks!” Bakugo shouts. “Those fake Side Characterz kept sabotaging us!”
“The Main Characterz,” Winnie clarifies. “Write that down write that down.”
Johnny makes a face and types on his laptop. “...Slander. Very fun.”
“It’s not slander if it’s true,” Forcas states.
“They did try to kill us,” Vince specifies.
“Attempted murder is barely anything,” Johnny mutters. “Do you have any comments on the future of the band?”
“World tour, baby!” Bakugo exclaims. “France has been fine, but we’ve got bigger plans! We’ll be all over the world, playing stadiums, selling out concerts, everything everywhere! Or at least the most commonly toured countries. Sorry to all of Africa.”
“You’ll be leaving?” Johnny’s typing speeds up. “What a shame! You’ve grown an audience here, and this article will only increase your popularity. Are you sure you can't stay for any longer?”
“Sorry, Sparkle.” Co-worker talks over the response Bakugo was about to give. “We made a promise to the world! They need us.”
McCoy cuts Co-worker off. “We’ll be leaving for Britain in a few weeks.”
“Well, we all miss you here in France.” Johnny says. He sits up, going in for the kill. “Do you think joining The Side Characterz was worth it?”
The five of them shout an answer at the same time. Rody hears answers ranging from “Hell no!” to “It was the best decision of my life!” The Side Characterz start bickering. They can’t fight again! Not in front of Johnny! Ok, think Rody, you’re their manager! Surely there’s something to be done!
Manager… Manager… Man…on? Wow, he’ll really find anyway to think about her. Rody never fought with Manon. Well, not very much at least. She was so sweet, so kind. She probably still is, even though she’s out of his life at the moment. She was sharp and witty. She could always make him laugh. She wasn’t a great cook, but Rody loved eating what she made. Her baking was always bitter. He wishes he could eat some of her food again, just once.
“That’s enough!” Rody’s thoughts are halted by the fact that Johnny just yelled. Uh oh! “You guys have got to be the MOST disrespectful group we’ve ever interviewed. Just because Scales: Music is Real is a smaller magazine doesn’t mean you can treat us however you like! You’re a dysfunctional band, you can’t cooperate, and you’ve been extremely inconsiderate to our employees! That isn’t the type of band we want to promote. Leave immediately.”
“Wait!” Rody tries to reason with Johnny. “Please I swear that we’ll-”
Johnny raises his hand in a summoning motion. “Boys!” He starts snapping rhythmically, shuffling closer to The Side Characterz. From the shadows two goons emerge, snapping the same rhythm as Johnny.
“Oh my god did Johnny just put a hit on us?!?” Winnie exclaims.
“Close.” Johnny reaches into his suit jacket and pulls out a small pistol. “But I do all my killing myself.” He fires a shot at The Side Characterz. Rody ducks, covering his ears from the noise. The window behind them shatters. He just barely missed Winnie’s head.
Taking action was a big part of the manager books. Stepping up and showing the band they can rely on you. That’s what Rody tells himself. Step up. But he’s paralyzed within his own mind. He can’t make himself do anything.
Vince is the one who takes action. He grabs Rody’s arm and shouts “Run!” They bolt to the hallway they came in from. More workers peel away from their desks, falling in place behind Johnny and joining the chorus of snaps. The Side Characterz avoid the elevator and instead take the stairs. Vince tries to go down, but quickly returns back up. “They must’ve called for backup, it’s swarming with security downstairs!”
They race up the stairs, the echoing snaps of Johnny’s goons right behind. Co-worker tries to pry a few doors open, only to find that they’re locked. Rody’s legs burn as they proceed upwards. They Side Characterz can’t go on for much longer.
The stairs end, leaving only a door and a sign labeled “roof access.” Co-worker slams his body against the door. It bursts open and they spill out onto the roof. There’s nowhere left to run, they wouldn’t survive if they jumped. Johnny’s trapped them.
“You wanna know something, fellas?” Johnny steps out onto the roof, brandishing his gun. “I joined Scales to write articles and kill people. And I’m all out of articles.”
Rody backs away, his feet only a few inches from the roof’s edge. The Side Characterz crowd around him, pushing him towards the front. Johnny grins, gun aimed straight at Rody. God, why did he have to die now? He hasn’t had his daily matcha latte yet and he forgot to bring his feminist literature to the interview! He wishes Johnny would snap a Clairo song, that would make death a bit better (5’9’’ btw). That bullet sure is gonna hurt when it blasts through his head. At least it won’t hurt as much as periods do.
Johnny chuckles. “Any last comments for the magazine?”
“I’d like to say that I’m sorry,” Rody says to the band. “I shouldn’t have ever started the competition. It was a dumb idea. We should’ve just taken turns with the bed.”
“I’m sorry too.” Winnie looks at Co-worker. “I shouldn’t have stolen your line about alpine skiing.”
Co-worker’s voice is low and remorseful. “Yeah, but I took it too far.”
“We all did,” Forcas adds.
“Our fighting was tearing our band apart, dude,” McCoy says. “And now we’re totally paying the price.” They look forward into the barrel of the gun. Man this shit’s gonna suck.
Rody slowly, softly, starts to sing. *To the tune of I’ve got the magic in me (from pitch perfect)* “I don’t got the magic in me.” He turns to look the band members in the eye. “Not without my friends. I don’t got the magic in me.” He failed them. Rody hangs his head in shame.
Bakugo’s voice lifts Rody’s head back up. “But when my friends are near.” He speaks the next part. “I feel the magic,” he claps a hand in front of his heart, “in here.”
Bakugo? He… feels the magic?? In… him??? Vince starts it back up again. “I’ve got the-”
“-magic, magic, magic.” The whole band + Rody sings. “Of friendship, friendship, friendship. Of friendship.” They hold the last note, harmonizing with each other. “I’ve got the friendship in me!” They shout together.
The Side Characterz smile warmly at each other. They look back to Johnny Sparkle. The gun covers his face. He slowly lowers it, and they see he is weeping. A small sniffling sound replaces the snapping from the goons. “I was wrong about you. I misjudged you. You boys really do care about each other, don’t you?” They all nod. Johnny steps forward, extending his hand out to Rody. “If you’re up to it, we would love to continue your interview.”
Rody looks back to the band. “Do you guys want to go back?” They all kinda shrug. Attempted murder don’t mean shit when they could get publicity out. Rody shakes Johnny’s hand. “We won’t give you as much trouble this time around.” The Side Characterz all laugh and head back downstairs to finish their interview. They don’t fight, they don’t lie. This interview is honest. It’s the best interview they’ve ever done.

Some days later, The Side Characterz unwind after a concert in the hotel pool. The night sky shines above them. And yeah, they’re all wearing swim trunks. Are you imagining it? You’re picturing them shirtless right now, aren’t you? Ok whore.
Bakugo swims laps around the pool. “This place is way better than the old hotel.”
Forcas picks a bandaid out of the water. “It’s still not the greatest.”
“The ladies were all over me tonight!” McCoy beams. “Guess it proves I’m still the hottest memb-” He’s cut off by Winnie splashing him with a huge wave. McCoy spits out some water and throws his own wave back at Winnie. They keep up their water fight much longer than they should.
“It's kind of chilly to be swimming,” Co-worker complains. “We should’ve waited until summer.” Bakugo rises from the water and splashes Co-worker. “Alright, you asked for it!” They wrestle underwater, a much less violent reprise of their fight at the magazine headquarters. Vince sits at a table near the pool, not swimming like a party pooper.
“Guys!” Rody runs in from the pool gate. “They published the magazine!”
The Side Characters stop fighting and swim to the edge of the pool and look up at the magazine in Rody’s hands. The Side Characterz are on the front cover wearing clothes styled around their specific colors. The band grabs for the magazine. Rody holds it just out of their grip.
He reads out a passage from the magazine. “After sitting down for an afternoon with The Side Characterz, we here at Scales have decided the battle of the bands winners are one of the most genuine upcoming bands we’ve ever seen!” The Side Characterz go crazy pool mode. “There’s three pages of interviews and a full poster!” Rody cheers.
Co-worker grabs the magazine and pulls it into the pool. Lucky for them, Rody bought every copy at the Leclerc checkout. He throws the extras into the pool. They shout out passages from the interview.
“Co-worker was decided the most girl crazy out of his bandmates!” Winnie calls out.
“Their fans call themselves Extraz due to what Bakugo shouted at the battle of the bands.” McCoy reads. “What the hell Bakugo?”
Bakugo laughs triumphantly. “I am the audience's favorite after all. Take that, asshole!”
“The Extraz certainly…” Vince contemplates, “has a ring to it.”
“Is it a good one?” Forcas swims up to Vince’s table.
“I wouldn’t say so.”
Co-worker reads the next part. “The Side Characterz will unfortunately be leaving soon for the next stop on their world tour, the U.K. We’ll all miss them here in France.”
“They better!” Bakugo shouts. “The Extraz love me sooooo much!”
“It turned out way better when we weren’t fighting.” Winnie flips through the pages.
“We never did settle who gets the bed,” Co-worker reminds them.
“I have a new plan for that.” Rody rubs his hands together in an evil manner. “First one to the bed gets it!” He calls out, running to the room. The Side Characterz clammer out of the pool and chase after him.
Rody, having the advantage of already being on the ground, easily makes it to the bed first. “Sorry lads,” he says at their arrival, “you should’ve gotten here faster.”
“Why do you always get the bed! When is it our turn?” Forcas shouts.
“If you had made such a big deal out of the competition, one of you would’ve gotten the bed.” Rody shrugs. “Not my fault.”
“Isn’t it though?” Winnie says. “You told us to lie.”
“Hey, yeah!” Bakugo joins in. “The competition was your idea!”
Uh oh. Rody sweats a bit. “Listen, guys, maybe we could talk this out?”
Forcas shakes his head. “The time for talking has passed.” He snaps his fingers. “Get him.” The Side Characterz rip Rody from the bed. Rody was wrong. Turns out The Side Characterz will share a bed with stinky boy band members if it means Rody sleeps on the floor. The five in the bed giggle and whisper secrets to each other. Rody feels très left out.
The press of the ground on his back is familiar. Rody is not looking forward to going to the U.K. But maybe there he’ll get to sleep in a bed. It feels a million miles away, though he knows it's not, he had to book the tickets. They’re leaving soon. Rody knew it was coming. Everything he had was in France.
Rody doesn’t think about leaving. He falls asleep instead. Tonight, he is in France. That has to be enough.

Chapter Text

“There’s no way you’re more attached to this hotel room than the last one,” Vince glares down at Winnie.
Winnie, sniffing a little, places his hand on the door. “It’s different this time. We barely even knew this hotel and we’re abandoning it. It’s cruel.”
Forcas gently sets his hands on Winnie’s shoulders. “I don’t think the hotel room cares, buddy. Come on,” he pulls Winnie from the door.
Bakugo flips his drumsticks in his hands. “Can we get out of here already?”
Co-worker glares into the room. “We could if our manager would man up and leave the damn hotel room.”
McCoy shouts through the doorway, “He’s still crying about his GIIIIIIIRRRLLLFRIEEEEENNNDD!!!!!”
“OOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!” The Side Characterz say like a bunch of kindergarteners.
Rody lies facedown on the bed. “Just because you’re all single and lonely doesn’t mean you get to take it out on me!” His cries are muffled through the sheets.
Co-worker taunts him, “She broke up with you a month ago! You’re the one who's single and lonely!” Co-worker high fives McCoy.
“Shut up!” Rody pouts. He feels like Manon just dumped him again, only if it was worse. The band can’t know how he feels, he tells himself, they only like singing and dancing and buying people. They wouldn’t know love if it bought them a drink at a gay bar.
Vince looms over Rody, his presence forcing Rody to look up at him. Vince’s gaze cuts through the blur of tears, straight into Rody’s eyes. “Get up,” Vince orders. Rody doesn’t move. “I’ll sue you if you don’t get up. I know you don’t have the money for a lawyer.”
Rody sniffles and stands up. He reluctantly meets the others in the hallway. “We can check out now,” he murmurs.
The walk to the reception is unbearably slow. He trudges along with The Side Characterz. He’s been like this all morning. He didn’t anticipate how much leaving would hurt. He spent his whole life in France, his family had never been inclined to travel. With Manon, they’d never had the money to travel out of the country. He tried to make every little trip special for her.
“You guys are free to go,” the woman at the front desk says. “I hope you enjoyed your stay!”
The Side Characterz climb onto the bike. Their train tickets aren’t until later that afternoon, so they have some time to kill. Forcas shouts from the front. “So first I think we’ll hit Expresso Yourself, Lyrics and Lattes, Bean Beverage Shop-”
“We’re banned from Bean Beverage Shop,” Winnie reminds him.
“Aw man. Guess we’ll have to hit that bowling alley then,” Forcas concludes.
“Strike of genius!” McCoy cheers. “That place is awesome. Super good gig, great crowd.”
“Wow. Hipster cafes and a bowling alley. What a victory tour,” Bakugo snarks.
“Why do so many French cafes have English names?” Co-worker questions.
“Stop questioning and pedal!” Forcas calls out.
Rody holds open the door to Expresso Yourself, allowing The Side Characterz to bring the whole bike into the store. They sit at a long table in the back of the cafe, sending Rody to order for them.
Rody slides his collectable mug onto the bar. “Hit me,” he tells the coffee bartender.
The bartender pours hot chocolate into his mug. “Rough day?”
Rody rests his head on the coffee bar. “We’re leaving today. Gonna continue the world tour. Yaaaaaaay.” His yaaaaaaay lacks enthusiasm.
The bartender piles whipped cream on the hot chocolate. “You’ll get good exposure though. It’ll be easier considering your growing fanbase.”
“Being popular in France doesn’t mean they’ll be popular in Britain, Johnny Bartender.” Rody says, raising his head to look at the bartender.
“Well, if you did it once you can do it again.” Johnny passes him back the mug. “It’s too bad though. I was just thinking that it’d be nice to have the band play here one more time.”
“We would have done it. You wouldn’t believe how many cafes we’ve been banned from.” Rody takes a bite out of his hot chocolate.
“You boys are always welcome here.” Bartender smiles. “Now, what did the others order?”
“Oh yeah, I totally forgot about them. How’d you know they were here?”
“You brought a bicycle made for six into a cafe. A yellow bicycle. I noticed that.”
Rody smiles sheepishly and retrieves The Side Characterz drinks. The night the band played here, the audience didn’t really enjoy it, but Johnny Bartender loved it so much he let them have free drinks for life. He was their first real fan. That was the third best concert they ever had. The first being the battle of bands because it gave them media attention. The second being their first ever concert because Manon was there.
Every concert, Rody scans the attendees for her. She hasn’t shown since the first one. He hates that she surely still thinks The Side Characterz are terrible. They’ve improved incredibly quickly, the music has become tolerable. She wouldn’t know.
Rody wallows in self pity while the band enjoys their drinks. They’ve set up an intense game of uno, with much yelling and cheating accusations. Co-worker eats a few of his cards. Rody doesn’t play, he doesn’t realize they were playing. They practically have to drag Rody from the cafe.
“This sad and mopey act is getting old,” Forcas says, guiding the bike to the next cafe.
“True!” McCoy joins in. “Imagine being this upset to leave France. This place blows.”
Vince is defensive, him also being from France. “If France is so terrible, why are we revisiting our old venues? Surely we don’t have fond memories here.”
“The cafe owners are probably tired of us,” Winnie admits.
“Johnny Bartender likes us!” Co-worker counters.
Bakugo pedals with his eyes closed. “He doesn’t count. I could fart and he’d call it the song of the century.” He rides the bike without his hands or a helmet. What a rebel.
“We have good music! That’s why we’re going to Lyrics and Lattes.” Forcas’s eye is watchful, he carefully maneuvers around pedestrians. “New and upcoming bands get discovered there all the time.”
Co-worker struggles to get his words out, tired from all the pedaling. “Can’t we just get discovered in Britain? They rejected us the last time we were there.”
Rody was rejected once, or rather he was dumped. There was a brief moment Manon did reject him before they started dating. She had recently dumped her boyfriend and wasn’t looking for anything serious. And yet later she was the one asking him out! Rody smiles at the memory, before his face falls again. She recently dumped her boyfriend again. Was she rejecting any boy she happened to meet? Or had she already entered another relationship, quick to move on from Rody?
“If we weren’t banned it’s good enough,” McCoy declares.
They arrive at Lyrics and Lattes, cramming the bike through the door. The cool part of Lyrics and Lattes is the fact that the cafe is only on the second floor, the main floor is reserved as a stage for performers. The Side Characterz aren’t performing today, so they enter through the second floor. The bike was surprisingly well-behaved going up all those stairs. They lean the bike against the railing and sit at a nearby table, with three on each side and Rody on the end.
Today’s performance is a play about a brother and sister buying a house on the cape, only to discover they’re being haunted by a ghost. It’d be interesting if it weren’t for all the unnecessary characters and subpar visual effects.
“That playwright character is named Roddy, like Rody!!” Co-worker points out. “That’s our manager!!!!”
The similarities are lost on Rody. He’s too busy scribbling in his manager notepad. “Bro when does this show get fucking good?” McCoy mutters. There’s a loud wind sound and Roddy is left alone to cast out the ghost. It would have been cool if not for the rest of the show being boring.
“Excuse me?” Two girls around their age walk up to them. “You’re The Side Characterz, right?”
“Yes we are,” Forcas answers. “Can we help you with anything?”
“Actually, could we get your autograph?” GAWAAAAAAAAAH?????? All seven of their mouths fall open and their thirteen eyes bug out of their heads. The Side Characterz agree enthusiastically and reach for napkins to sign. “Could you sign this, please?” One of the women holds out the edition of Scales with them on the cover.
“Sorry, we’re big fans,” the other woman says.
Winnie grabs the pen out of Rody’s hand. “Don’t be, that’s great!” Each of them sign their names over themselves on the magazine cover. Co-worker adds his number underneath despite the fact that he will be leaving today and doesn’t have time for hook-ups.
“Thank you!” The women leave, giggling to each other. When the women are out of sight, The Side Characterz giggle too. The Extraz are real! Rody thought Johnny Sparkle made them up. They chatter excitedly, fangirling over their fangirls.
One time Rody knew a girl. She was the best thing that ever happened to him, even if she was in debt to the mob. He remembers their last night together. They sat by each other on the couch, and some movie was playing on the TV. Rody hadn’t been paying attention to it, his focus on Manon. She wasn’t paying attention to it either, her mind was elsewhere.
He asked her what was wrong but she told him it was nothing. He turned off the movie and scooped her the last of the ice cream. He spent the rest of the night trying to make her smile. Rody can still see her smile, hear her laugh, taste the bit of ice cream she fed him. It feels so long ago, but he knows it wasn’t. He really did lose so much so fast.
“There’s a cast meet and greet next,” Winnie suggests, placing tip money down on the table. “We could meet Roddy!” He grins at Rody.
Forcas grabs Co-worker’s wrist and looks at the time on his watch. “If we want to make it to the bowling alley we’ll have to skip it.”
“Finally! I can’t drink another coffee!” Bakugo exclaims. “Lets get the hell out of here!”
They shuffle out of the cafe and hop on the bike. They’ve gotten better at riding, Rody has to increase his speed to a brisk walk. The ride is silent, the few rides before taking the energy away from them.
Strike of Genius is deserted. The only others there are a father and son and a middle aged woman. The place smells like cigarettes and floor polish. Co-worker grins devilishly. “The bowling alley is ours for the taking!” They slip on the smelly rental shoes and grab balls from the rack.
They get lane four. Winnie inputs them into the game. “Oh no, the max number of players is six! Someone will have to sit out.”
“I’ll do it,” Rody offers, already ripping papers from his manager notepad.
McCoy is up first. “I used to be somewhat of a bowling prodigy in my youth, so don’t feel too bad if you can’t beat me.” He gets a perfect strike, sending him to the top of the leaderboard.
Bakugo is next. “We’ll see about that!” Bakugo also gets a strike. This kicks off a large and passionate bowling war between the two, ultimately ending in Vince winning the whole game.
Forcas stands and stretches. “I’m gonna grab one of those terrible bowling alley milkshakes.”
“Off to drink your feelings, loser?” Co-worker taunts.
“You were second to last,” Forcas grumbles. He almost trips over Rody, who is hunched on the floor arranging papers into different formations. Forcas glances at the papers and back at Rody. “What’s all this for, tiger?”
Rody snaps up, standing, then sitting down again because he got dizzy. “My master plan to get Manon to give me a second chance! Step one: I arrive at her apartment, freshly showered, carrying my guitar and chocolate and flowers. Step two: I serenade her with you guys as back up. Step three: She learns how good you’ve become and that I’m still good to be with. Step four: She joins us in Britain or we go long distance, but that wouldn’t really be ideal.”
Forcas holds back a frown. “You’re sure this will work?”
Rody nods feverishly. “I’ve done the calculations! She said she still loved me when we broke up, so clearly she’s willing to give me, to give us, another shot.”
“Maybe do some more calculations,” Forcas advises. He continues his quest for a milkshake.
“Damn, when did all these people get here?” Bakugo observes. The bowling alley is indeed filled with people of all ages, lined up to bowl. They didn’t notice the sudden influx of people, or the fact that they are all senior citizens or that they all came from the same senior living transportation van. The seniors stagger to throw their bowling balls. Most of them are pretty good, except for one whose ball lost momentum and got stuck in the middle of the lane.
“I just talked to the owner,” Forcas says, strawberry milkshake in hand. “It’s the 60+ regional tournament today and the lanes are reserved for it, so we can’t bowl anymore.”
“Why’d we even come? This band is a prisonnnnnnn,” Winnie whines.
“It’s not all bad. The owner remembered us and asked us if we wanted to perform again today.” The other band members perk up. They like performing. “What are we thinking, fellas?”
“Hell yeah, impromptu performance!” McCoy whoops. The band shares his sentiment, they didn’t have anything else planned for the day.
Forcas gives his milkshake to Rody. “Drink this for me.” The Side Characterz clamour onstage, free of equipment. Strike of Genius still has their tracks on file, so the first song of their set rings out. “Oh baby, you're my baby, my girl baby, my babygirl, I'll love you forever my baby, my girl.”
Rody drinks the milkshake glumly. “I wrote that song for my girlfriend,” he says to no one in particular.
“No you didn’t,” a nearby old woman protests. “You aren’t a member of the band! You probably don’t even know who they are!”
The second old woman next to her shakes her head. “Kids these days. They’ll take any situation and make it about themselves.”
“I’m their manager.” Rody keeps his tone as professional and conversational as he can. “And I’m a thirty-one year old man.”
“Teenagers!” The first lady snorts.
The second lady chimes in. “If you’re going to lie you should do it right. Tell him, Ethel.”
Ethel, a third old woman, lectures Rody. “Band managers don’t write their songs for them! When I was your age, I was the manager for the newest upcoming band of the seventies! They never could settle on a name, but they were so cute it didn’t matter. Back then boy bands were new. I was able to see The Beatles live in concert, and they had a hand in the formation of my band! Ringo never returns my calls anymore, but…”
Ethel prattles on. Sometimes managers do have to write songs. He doesn’t want to explain his crazy mixed-up life to a bunch of old ladies. The Side Characterz sing until the tournament ends. The old people really like them! Rody would write this down if he wasn’t being miserable and overdramatic.
Forcas orders them all a round of milkshakes. “What noW? All the other places we played banned us.”
Bakugo gives his shake a big fat slurp. “We are shitheads.”
“And we don’t have anything to do on our last day in France!” McCoy laments.
Vince passes his milkshake to Co-worker, who eagerly drinks it. “I have to go to the bistro. I need to find a manager before I leave.”
“You haven’t found one yet?” Winnie asks.
Vince shrugs. “No one who has applied has been up to my standards.”
“We should go with you! Help you find someone good enough for you.” Co-worker says.
“No, you shouldn’t.” Vince answers.
“Beats hanging around here.” Bakugo stands up, prepping to leave.
“No, don’t come!” Vince shouts. Too late. They are already on the bike. Forcas rings the bell expectantly. Vince plants himself in front of the bike. “You can’t make me get on that.” He crosses his arms.
“Ok then.” Forcas launches his backup plan. “Rody, get on.” Rody hops on the bike where Vince normally sits. “We’re going to get to the restaurant before you and hire a manager ourselves!”
Vince’s eyes widen. “Wait, stop!”
“Onwards!” The bike starts moving. Vince is left to chase after it, The Side Characterz are quite fast when they are determined to be mean. Vince just barely beats them.
“The bike isn’t allowed in the restaurant,” Vince declares. The Side Characterz push it through the door anyway. “Stop! Put it in the alleyway!”
Bakugo turns to face him. “Will you let us interview people for you?”
“If that’s what it takes to get that disgusting thing out of here.” The Side Characterz let loose an evil laugh. They store the bike in the alley and crowd into Vince’s office.
Vince checks the list of applicants. “Why are you doing this?”
Winnie responds, “We’re helping out our friend.”
“We’re bored?” Co-worker offers.
“We want to ruin your restaurant and destroy your cooking career so you’re stuck as a bad boy for the rest of your life,” Bakugo interjects.
“Hm.” He retrieves the applicants from the dining room. “These are the only people left, so you have to pick from one of them.”
“The manager we pick will be so bad that your fancy ass restaurant will be nothing but ash the moment you leave!” Bakugo asserts.
“Your opinion doesn’t actually matter. I’m making the final decision.” Vince lets the first person in.
The strong aroma of perfume wafts into the room. The candidate's high heels click against the floor. Her hair is tied up in a side ponytail, her bracelets clink together, and she seems to have drawn herself knuckle tattoos that say “BADB ITCH.” Her aura of power is similar to that of a manager.
Vince checks his list. “Are you Kandi Blossom?”
“That's me!” She smiles cheerfully. “How are we all doing today?”
“Fine.” Vince writes some things on his clipboard. He immediately jumps into the interview. “What prior experience do you have? It didn't say on your resume.”
“Oh my gosh, so this guy Claude owns his own restaurant,” she launches into her life's story, “and I eat there all the time. So one day Claude comes up to me and he's all like ‘when a beautiful woman such as yourself eats at a man's restaurant as often as you do, he ought to know her name.’ And he's so charming and I'm flattered, so of course I say yes when he asks me out!”
“That's cool,” McCoy says.
“Yeah, but then fast forward two years and I've moved in with Claude. He's nice and all, super sweet, I thought everything was going smoothly. So I bought a ring for him thinking I was going to propose.”
“Damn straight! Women proposing is cool as hell!” Bakugo shouts, as he is a proud feminist.
“You get it. The night is gorgeous and everything is lovely, but right before I grab the ring box, this woman storms in and yells at Claude for cheating on him!”
Co-worker is on the edge of his seat. “Girl nuh-uh.”
“Yuh-huh. And so the both of us drop that cheating bastard and I sell the ring.”
“As you should!” Co-worker nods in approval.
“Right, so me and the other woman start hanging out over our mutual hatred for Claude. I find out her name is Livia, and she's knockout hot. Jaw-droppingly beautiful. And I was thinking about asking her out.”
“She sounds way better than Claude,” Co-worker agrees, spurring her on. “You should definitely go for it.”
“But Livia also works in the food industry and I think that she might be cooler than me!”
“Girl, there's no one cooler than you.”
“I was surprised too, trust me. So I was thinking to myself, hey, wouldn't it be great to get back at Claude and impress Livia if I became the manager of this bistro? That's what I'm here.”
Vince raises his eyebrows. “That’s… not prior experience. Are you only interviewing because you want to impress a girl?”
“And get back at my ex!” Kandi adds. “Plus, I'm a huge fan of The Side Characterz.”
“Yay!” Winnie cheers. “I love fans!”
“I actually came up with the name Extraz y’know.”
McCoy shudders. “So it's your fault!”
“Ha! Take that, loser!” Bakugo gloats.
“Wait, I forgot!” Forcas rushes out of the office. “I’ll be right back.”
“Back to the interview.” Vince flips the page on his clipboard. “How do you handle stressful situations?”
“I'd probably just cry,” Kandi says, without a trace of doubt or embarrassment in her voice.
“...Moving on. How would you run the restaurant?”
“Pretty chill. As long as everyone respects me, I respect them.”
Vince crosses out her name. “Last question. What's your biggest weakness?”
“Heights, for sure.”
Vince turns back to the band. “What do you all think?” He whispers, careful Kandi doesn't hear him.
“She's a diva,” Co-worker decides. “We have to hire her.”
McCoy sucks air though his teeth. “She seems unreliable, yo.”
“I agree,” Winnie says. “Like 6/10.”
Vince nods and addresses Kandi. “I'm not hiring you.”
“Damn.” Kandi frowns and walks out. “Goodbye, Side Characterz.”
“Goodbyyyeeeeee~” All but Vince harmonize.
“I'm back!” Forcas sings his words. In his arms he holds a radio. “The other day I ran into a radio host on the street and I sang for them. They thought I was pretty good, so I gave them our recordings and…” He flicks the radio on. It’s playing a song that Rody hasn’t heard before. “Well, not now, but later it’s gonna play one of our songs!”
The Side Characterz gasp with delight. “We’re gonna be on the radio? For real?” Winnie puts his ear right against the speaker, like that will somehow make the song play faster.
Co-worker cheers. “I knew this would work out! Take that, dad!”
“Leave it on in the background. We still have more interviews to do.” Vince ushers in the next batch of applicants.
The other candidates consist of a man who refuses to leave his lizard at home, a different man who wants the bistro to get a normal menu, and an old woman who thought this was the bowling tournament. They receive a 5/10, 3/10, and 8/10 respectively.
Bakugo shouts, “Everyone shut up! It’s starting!” The opening of Baby Love You Babygirl plays.
Winnie whispers excitedly, “That’s us! It’s really our song!” Crowded around the radio, they carefully listen, taking in every second of their first radio song. Inevitably, the song finishes, Forcas’s last note trailing off.
“That was The Side Characterz song, “Baby love you Babygirl”, France’s very own self made boy band!” The band squeals and high fives and chest bumps and whatnot. “Now for some classics, starting with More Than a Feeling, by Boston.” They leave the radio on background noise.
“We’re all out of candidates.” Vince looks over his list. “Everyone has been rejected.”
“Our bad.” Co-worker admits.
“I guess I can promote one of the chefs…” Vince reaches for the door handle. The door opens by itself, revealing a young man standing in the doorway. Vince immediately grabs the doorframe, blocking the man’s view of The Side Characterz with his arm. “Richard? What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to say goodbye before you left. Maryse said you’re never at the bistro anymore, but I thought you’d be here today.” Richard peeks over Vince’s arm. “What’s going on back there?”
“I’m looking to hire a manager. Interviews are being conducted today.”
Richard’s voice is tinged with laughter, “So you’ve got the band helping you out?” Vince’s grip on the doorframe tightens. “I wish I could’ve made it to your concert here. I heard it was really something.”
Vince scowls. “Actually-”
“Relax, Vince, it’s a joke! I was wondering-” He cuts himself off, squinting at the band. “Rody, is that you?” Richard pushes past Vince, standing in front of Rody. “I thought so, it is you!” His smile has a sinister undertone. “It’s me, Richard, from class!”
Rody’s face falls more. This is not the blast from the past he wanted to see today. “Oh, uh-”
“Econ, remember? I think you were majoring in hospitality, too!”
“Right, ah. Right, college is a bit fuzzy for me-”
Richard surveys The Side Characterz. “I guess it’s not surprising that you’d end up around people like… them…” He locks eyes with McCoy. A hush falls over the room, leaving the music as the only sound. It's more than a feeling (more than a feeling) When I hear that old song they used to play (more than a feeling).
Richard's face flushes. He blinks, trying to regain his composure. “What- what were we talking about again?”
Rody, eager to change the subject, says “Manager interviews.”
“Oh, yeah, right.” Richard's eyes stay locked on McCoy. “How is…” he looks over McCoy, blushing more the longer he stares at him. “How are those going?”
Vince considers Richard. “You said you took econ?”
“Hm?” Richard snaps out of his daze. “Yeah, I did.”
“Are you still job hunting?”
Richard, embarrassed to be outed as unemployed in front of McCoy, stutters, “Y-yes.”
“How would you like to be the new manager of La Gueule de Saturne?”
“Me? Manage your restaurant? Vince, I'm flattered, but I don’t think I'm the person you want.”
“You already know your way around the food industry and you’re familiar with the way the bistro is run.” Richard contemplates the offer. Vince addresses the band. “What do you all think?”
“He seems good enough,” Winnie admits. “Way better than the other ones.”
“I think he's a ten for sure.” McCoy winks at Richard.
“You're approved.” Vince writes something on his clipboard. “You start tomorrow.” Vince opens the door to leave.
“Pardon?? What about training??” Richard chases after Vince.
Vince ignores him. “Here are the keys. You'll find everything you need in the cabinets or the desk.”
“Wha- so soon?”
“I've got a train to catch. Side Characterz, out.” The Side Characterz leave without saying anything more to Richard.
The band stands in front of the restaurant. Forcas peeks at Co-worker’s watch. “Guess we should head to the station and wait there.”
Co-worker pries his wrist out from Forcas’s hand, talking to Vince. “You let him take over pretty easily. I thought you cared about the restaurant.”
“He'll be fine.” Vince looks up at the bistro. Wishing it goodbye, most likely. Abandoning his life's work for some boy band. Rody can relate, if his restaurant was his ex-girlfriend he hasn’t seen for weeks. Shit hurts.
McCoy pats around his shirt, feigning search of something. “Oh no,” he says flatly. “I can't find my uh- my shark tooth necklace!” It's still sitting on his neck. “I must have left it in the office. I'll go back and get it.”
“If you and Richard have sex in my restaurant I'll cook you,” Vince threatens.
“What? Richard will be there? What a surprise!” McCoy robotically walks into the restaurant. “Maybe this Richard guy will have seen my necklace.”
“Meet us at the train station when you find it!” Winnie calls out. McCoy enters the restaurant and shuts the door behind him. They can hear his footsteps running through the kitchen to the office from outside. “We should go there too.”
“Better idea,” Rody pulls out his pieces of manager paper from his pocket, “we could go to my old apartment and say goodbye to Manon!”
The Side Characterz groan. Co-worker dramatically slides down against the wall and sits on the ground. “Rody, we are not hitting up your ex. We’re tired.”
“We just went to Vince’s apartment!” Rody counters. “Why can’t we go to mine!”
“You don’t live there anymore,” Forcas points out.
“True!” Rody sorts the papers on the ground. “However Manon still lives there, so should pay her a visit. Like Richard did for Vince.”
“Richard didn’t dump me,” Vince clarifies.
“He didn’t?!?” Winnie jumps up. “Vince, Richard is cheating on you!! He’s probably holding hands with McCoy in your office!!!”
“What? We weren’t dating. I meant that Richard likes me and Manon doesn’t like Rody.”
“Richard likes you?!!?” Co-worker shouts. “Then why the hell is he banging McCoy?!?!!?!”
“No, not like that!” Vince’s frustration increases. “I am not in love with him and he is not in love with me. We are friends.”
Bakugo leans against the restaurant wall, squinting through the glass window. “Guess you aren’t very good friends if you let him get freaky with McCoy,” he says McCoy like it's the most disgusting thing ever.
“No, they are good friends because Vince let him take over the restaurant,” Forcas says.
“Yeah, really good friends.” Co-worker elbows Vince.
“I have a really good friend,” Winnie inputs helpfully.
Rody yells above their voices, “Why are we talking about this when we could be talking about Manon!?!”
“No one wants to talk about your ex-girlfriend," Vince’s voice is monotone and filled with truth.
“I do! Here’s what I’m thinking…” Rody flips the little papers like a flip book. “We knock on the door and Manon answers, unaware that it will be me. Then I say a really suave pickup line, which is your cue to launch into the new and improved version of Babygirl love you forever. Our combined efforts will be enough to persuade her into coming with us for the rest of the tour!” His flipbook ends with him, Manon, and The Side Characterz all cheering. “Or maybe our grand reunion will persuade you guys to drop the whole manager thing, who knows?”
Co-worker bursts Rody’s bubble. “That’s not going to happen.”
“Who knows?” Rody collects their things. “If we leave right now, we can still make it to the train in time!”
“We are not going to visit your ex!” Forcas tells him with force. “We’re tired. We did a lot today. And honestly, nobody wants to see you get your hopes up only to get rejected by a girl who doesn’t care about you anymore. We want to go to the train station and color those coloring books Co-worker brought.”
“That’s not gonna happen! She’s nice! She wouldn’t do that!” No one is moved by Rody’s words. “Well fine, I’ll just go by myself!”
Vince stops him. “You’re not allowed to do that. You legally can’t run away. You signed a contract.”
“You let me go alone before! Like at the battle of the bands and when I was Vince’s waiter!”
Co-worker lights up a cigarette for a smoke. “Yeah, but you wouldn’t have run away then. You’ve had a lot of traitor talk recently.”
“I wouldn’t do that!!” Rody looks away. “I don’t have the money to get sued.”
“Then you’ll have to come with us to the train station.” Forcas rallies the guys up. “Let’s go, everyone.”
“Fine, I’ll have to pull out my ultimate weapon!” Rody takes a deep breath. “PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE…” he continues to shout the whole walk over. The Side Characterz do their best to ignore him, but oh my god!!! It’s super annoying.
“SHUT UP!!” Bakugo shouts. “I’ll take you to her fucking apartment if you’ll shut up!!!!”
“Yes!” Rody cheers and grabs Bakugo’s arm. “This way!”
Bakugo shoves Rody off of him. Rody leads Bakugo to the apartment, he hasn't forgotten the way back. The front desk is empty. Rody runs his hand across the lobby walls. Everything is so familiar, the smell of the lobby, the plant dying in the corner, the flicker of the lights. Rody wanted to move to someplace nicer, but there never seemed to be enough money. Manon hadn’t seemed to mind. Rody always thought she deserved better.
He presses the same button he’d pressed a thousand times before. The elevator creaks upwards. The posters are all the same, an advertisement for a school play, swimming lessons, the number for a repairman. Rody called once. The t.v was broken, you could only hear it from one side. He wanted it fixed for movie night.
Ding! The door shudders open. The hallway smells different. Cleaner. Could Rody really have been that filthy? He was doing better, he couldn’t be messy for Manon. He wanted to be perfect for her. Was it not enough? Is that why she said they needed to take a break? She said she still loved him… hadn’t she?
His hand shakes as he grabs the doorknob. He thinks of her every day. He misses her so much. He wishes she would have told him about the mob sooner. He wouldn’t have been mad. They could have worked something out together. They could have stayed together. At least she won’t be hurt now. He still saved her. Even if it meant losing her, Rody is glad he did it.
“Open the damn door,” Bakugo barks. Rody pushes the door open. He freezes in the doorway. His breath is shallow. The apartment is empty. There’s no furniture. No tables, chairs, or dressers in sight.
Rody walks numbly through the apartment. His legs feel as heavy as lead. He glances around, looking for any remnant of Manon. Any sign that she lived here at all. He hears something crunch beneath his foot. It’s a flyer. An apartment for lease. The very one he’s standing in now.
“She…” Rody looks around, expecting her to walk down the stairs at any second. “She’s not…” He crumples up the flyer and tosses it across the room. The apartment feels so big without the furniture, without her. Rody turns back to face Bakugo. “She’s gone,” his voice trembles.
Bakugo shuffles into the apartment, inspecting everything. “I thought I’d be able to make fun of you when she dumped you again. This is just sad.” He squats near the door. “We should get outta here.”
“Not yet.” Rody drifts through the apartment. Hadn’t the microwave been there? And the couch was there, across from the t.v. Manon stored her baking supplies in the cabinet next to the dishwasher. Or were they in the cabinet next to the window? Wait, weren’t they in the one by the fridge? He can’t remember.
Upstairs. The bed is gone. A patch of paint is missing from the wall. Manon taped up a photo of them. The paint must have ripped off when she took the photo down. What had become of his things? His cologne, his roller stakes, and his guitar were in his luggage. What about his bike, the trusty steed he rode with pride? His C.D collection wasn’t there, had Manon sold it? She didn’t enjoy the music as much as he did, but she’d dance with him anyway. And what about his beer?!? It’s gone. He checks the fridge.
“What are we supposed to do now?” Rody asks aloud. “We came here to talk to Manon, and she isn’t here.”
Bakugo stands up. “We leave. This place is super boring anyway.”
“But I had so much to tell her! How am I supposed to talk to her if she’s not here?”
“You don’t. Let’s go.”
“But what about-”
“It doesn’t matter!” Bakugo snaps. “She isn’t here now and she’s not going to come back! Are you just going to sit and cry in an apartment that isn’t yours over a girl that doesn’t care about you anymore? Are you gonna be a damn pussy? You’re nothing more than a pathetic bastard who can’t move on from his ex! It’s pathetic, Rody! How do you expect to do anything if you can't get over her!?”
Rody’s face crumples. “But I'm only a manager because of Manon. What's the point if I'm not doing it for her?”
“Who cares? Not like you can quit.” Rody isn't convinced. Bakugo exhales with annoyance. “Look, you got fucked over and now you have to deal with it. You don't have to like it, you just have to do it. You can't live your life in the past, Rody. Believe me.” Bakugo’s voice softens. “It only makes things harder.”
Rody knows he's right. Best case scenario, he won't see her for the rest of the year. Worst case… Rody grabs the locket from his pocket. Manon’s face smiles back at him. He might never see her again. The longer he holds on, the longer it will hurt.
Rody nods. “Ok.” He spends one last second in the apartment, drinking it in. He steps into the hallway with Bakugo and smiles. “I wanted her to move to a nicer place anyway.”
“Finally. Let’s get to the train station.” Bakugo walks to the elevator.
Rody wraps Bakugo in a hug from behind. “Thanks.”
Bakugo blushes, squirming in Rody’s grip. “Hey! Get off me, idiot!” Unable to free himself from Rody’s arms, Bakugo pulls out an old classic. “Baku-BLAST!” This is one of Bakugo’s special moves, where he gets uncomfortable and launches himself and everyone around him thirty feet into the air. Rody and Bakugo fly through Paris, wind tearing at their faces. They crash land at the train station.
Winnie greets them, “Hi guys! You’re just in time for the train!”
Forcas pulls them up. “Now we’re only waiting on-
“McCoy!” Co-worker waves. “Over here!” McCoy saunters over. “You have fun with Richard?” Co-worker elbows McCoy.
“Yeah mate, it was pretty nice.” McCoy has a silly lovesick look on face. He’s covered in lipstick kiss marks. “Nothing major.” Richard’s phone number is written in big black marker across his forehead.
“The train is here!” Vince shouts. A second later, they can hear the train pulling into the station. The Side Characterz scramble through the security checks and onto the train. Rody settles into a seat by himself, the one next to it being used for their bags. The rest of The Side Characterz are in pairs, Winnie with McCoy, Forcas with Co-worker, and Vince with Bakugo.
The train ride should be around two and a half hours long. Rody’s heart pulls back to France. It’s weird, leaving it after all this time. Leaving Manon behind. But England will be a fresh start. With France and Manon behind him, he can head towards the future. He looks back at the locket. He traces the indented cow, his finger gliding across the faded metal. He look back at the band and slips the locket back into his pocket. From now on, his focus will be on making The Side Characterz the best possible band they can be. After all, he is their manager. It’s what he has to do.