Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Well fuck me and fuck today, because first of all I can’t play for the life of me and second shitty hair and dunce face are blabbering about something I couldn’t give 2 shits about. Practice sucks and I can't focus. I’m ripped from my all consuming thoughts when the coach’s voice rings out, ordering another 2v2, and I'm forced to get up.

The coach tosses me the ball, I check Kirishima once, twice, and then I’m running. My shoes hit the floor, every quick turn and maneuver causing them to squeak against the wooden floors. I dodge Kirishima’s attempt to block, moving up and to shoot the ball, and I fucking miscalculate my jump. Messing up my throw and the shitty piece of rounded leather hits the rim. It rolls around the hoop for a solid minute, that little shit, and falls away from the rim along with my hopes and dreams. I’m gonna shoot myself. A loud buzzer alarming throughout the gym to signify the end of the 2v2.

“Yo, Bakugo, what the hell was that?” Shinsou yells angrily. “We aren’t going to win any games, especially nationals, with you playing like that”

“Shut the hell up,” I snap back, going after the basketball. And it's obvious that the rest of the team is looking at me like I just kissed a woman. Utterly fucking shocked.

I snatch up the ball, clenching it so hard my nails dig into the leather. Maybe it’ll explode. It’s what the little piece of fucking rubber and dye deserves.

I pass it to Kaminari, who isn’t paying attention, causing the ball to slam directly into his face. Serves him right. I may have laughed if it weren’t for the fact that I’m fucking pissed. Dunce face yelps and catches it when it hits the floor and bounces back at him.

“One more 2v2 and then your sweaty asses are going to hit the showers and get out!” Coach Yagi shouts. Most of the guys on the team call him 'All Might’ ‘cuz he was the ‘all mighty retired NBA player.’ He had to quit because he got an injury on his stomach. I remember that game like I remember the passcode to my phone.

“Yeah, you guys aren’t cute at all. And you stink” Himoko says with a grin from beside Yagi. She organizes the whole team, but she’s fuckin’ strange. Always drinking cherry kool-aid, sucking on it like it’s blood and she’s a weird ass vampire, would believe it if it wasn't for the fact that she lives in the sun.

“And please for the life of me clean up after yourselves when you're done with the showers, I don’t want to have to clean up after you animals," a rough voice says from beside coach yagi. The assistant coach, Touya, or Dabi. He’s never clarified what his actual fucking name is. I don’t know what his deal is. He helps find practice games and he coaches when Yagi isn’t here.
“Yes, coaches," the team yells in sync, Shoto and Shinso taking their stances on one side of the court while Sero and Shoji take their side on the other. The whistle blows and the round begins. Shoji makes the first move, stealing the ball from the middle and charging down the left hand side. Before he makes it to the hoop Shinso steals the ball, like the sick fucking ghost he is, and shoots for a 3 pointer, which Sero blocks. Shoto snatches the ball from the air, and shoots again. This one makes it in. He turns and laughs at Sero, who's smiling like a child who’s just found pornhub for the first time.

I walk out of the locker room, annoying shit one and annoying shit two following behind me. Gym was fucking ass, even though it mostly always is, just doesn't entertain myself like it used. Now it's boring as fuck and I get pissed off every time I screw up. I walk across the gym floor, flopping down onto the bleachers. I had to deal with these two for another 20 minutes before study hall. I might beat someone to a pulp I swear to God.

“YOO, KIRI, BAKUBRO! Y’ALL HEAR ‘BOUT THAT NEW STUDENT?!” Kaminari says entirely too loudly, propping himself up on the bleacher behind him. And now I have a headache, thank you so fucking much, dunce face. I might actually kill him with a fucking grenade.

Now I’m rolling my eyes because I genuinely don’t give 2 fucks. Why should I? I swear we have a new student every other day, I don't give two shits and it's actually getting to the point of being annoying.. Kaminari starts spouting some bullshit. Fuckin weirdos, I should never have become friends with these 2 brainless idiots.

“Yeah, I heard it from Mina. She said they were a cutie…” Kirishima says, the gym echoing softly around us.

“Maybe all that hair dye finally fried you and Pinky's brains…I can see your roots. Might wanna book your next hair appointments” I say with a scoff. I’m being serious though his roots are showing, it’s quite embarrassing.

“Okay queen, go off” Kaminari says, okay that's I'm actually fucking leaving these two.

They are pissing me the fuck off, but I’m stuck listening to these 2 idiots’ conversations for the rest of the day. I don’t even get to catch a break at lunch. They’re like shadows that follow me around 24/7 and never shut up, which is a lot more than mildly inconvenient for me, considering I already have a massive migraine. I glance up from my phone scowling at the brainless duo I see in front of me. Who the hell decided for me to be friends with them? It was me, me and my bad choices.

“Are we gonna ignore the fact that Katsuki absolutely sucked balls today?” Shinsou says, walking over, bouncing a basketball leisurely. I glare at him because I feel that that’s the only positive response to this instead of cussing the shit out of this off brand homeless person.

“Yeah that’s because he’s gay” Kaminari grins stupidly, making me roll my eyes again.

“Shut the hell up you idiot” I snap, throwing a towel at his head. I might kill them. Or myself, we’ll see which one happens first.

“Not denying it~” Kaminari snickers, barely dodging the towel. I hate this half assed piece of shit, why am I friends with him…whatever he’s not that bad I guess.

But now I’m sick of their voices. I stand up, and walk across the gym, grabbing my water bottle and squirting some in my mouth. I start walking back over to them, when suddenly, pink cheeks’ annoying ass voice rings through the gym.

“Here’s the gym, this is where the volleyball and basketball teams practice. The basketball team just made it to quarterfinals! They might make it to nationals in a few months at this rate..”

I’m almost entirely positive that whoever is standing next to pink cheeks, is the most utterly gorgeous being that exists in the world today. I am being so for real right now. Yep, they’re dying first. I will not kill myself knowing that he exists.

“Damn shawty fine, no homo” Kaminari says, again, entirely too loud.

The gorgeous being glances around the gym, turns my new favorite color, pink, and looks away. Somehow within the span of a minute, my favorite color changes again. My new favorite color is a color prettier than the pink he just turned. I meet his eyes. Green. A green so beautiful it could be used as paint for a painting worth millions. Or for a forest that could shine even if cut down, or an emerald worth a thousand diamonds.

Shinsou does something absolutely fucking idiotic. As I’m passing by in front of gorgeous being, Shinsou’s annoying, shitty, stupid self tosses a basketball at me. And he isn’t even close. It’s going right for his head.

“Dek- shit.. I mean duck!” I curse, stepping forwards and catching the ball before it hit him in the face. The ball was inches away from hitting the boy nerd face. Which would have most definitely hurt with how hard stupid Shinsou threw it.

“Dayum, Bakubro getting rizzyyyy” Kaminari called, and Kirishima cackled. I flick a middle finger up towards the two. The action is backed up with no rage though, because at this point I think I’m starting to get used to the two nut jobs and their actions.

I look down at gorgeous being, who's blushing like an absolute maniac, and before I can even think about asking him his name, He smiles sheepishly at me, and he gets distracted by something, and walks over to a drama banner to the side of the gym, by the exit. All likeness for him gets shoved to the bottom of my heart and beat up by disgust, who really is a dick.

And finally, ‘gorgeous being’, who I now hate, leaves. Chatting with pink cheeks as if they’re known each other for years, he seems like the type to make friends quickly. He’ll also probably be dating someone in a week or two with how he looks.

Now he’s disappeared into the hallways of this hell hole of a school. Whoever that was, fuck that guy. Fucking drama nerd.

I throw down the basketball, making it bounce off the floor once and hit Shinsou, who caught it as it hit him in the chest. “Watch what you’re doing, shit for brains. Talking about how I play like shit when we definitely won’t make it to nationals if that's how you pass the ball,” I snap. The bell rings, the angry noise drilling holes in my head.

“Did you hear that one?” Kirishima mocks. That made me even more pissed. Dunce face and shitty hair think it’s so funny that I can't hear shit. They think it’s so funny that the school had to make the bell louder because I couldn’t hear it and was always late for the first 3 weeks of school. Assholes.

I gather my shit, kirishima leans against the wall as we wait for slow wits over there to gather his stuff. Finally after what feels like twenty years Kaminari makes his way over to us and we start walking down the hallway to math. I absolutely fucking hate math and that stupid teacher. She doesn't know how to teach for shit, and all she does is call on anybody not paying attention to that math problem because she doesn't know how. Fucking bitch.

We make our way down the hallway, stopping at our lockers that are right outside her door to grab our notebooks and workbooks and shit. Because for some fucking reasons we aren’t allowed to carry more than 3 books at a time. Probably due to some stupid safety law but whatever. I quickly grab my books waiting for the two extras to finish, before heading into the class. Which I notice straight away that the fucking drama nerd is in this stupid class. Of course he fucking is what is my luck. I try my best to ignore that chattering between people and grumble over to my seat, sitting down.

Kirishima and Kaminari start yapping about some shitty joke or whatever, not that I care, Iti would probably make my head combust. Suddenly Kaminari doubles over laughing at Kirishima whose face is freakishly close to the color of his head, and then a louder laugh from both the two nut cases at Kaminari falls from his chair. I groan, my anger bubbling below the surface, glaring at Kaminari who's still laughing for absolutely no reason. I avoid my eyes from the two, searching around the room when my eyes meet with the weirdos. He quickly adverts his gaze from mine and I can see a soft pink covering his face and neck as he sinks lower into his seat.

“Hey! You’re the new kid! Wow, you’re cute..!” a high pitched voice that would only belong to Toga rings loudly throughout the classroom, obviously startling Izuku, because he jumps almost 4 inches out of his seat. “Oh.. hi um, my name's Izuku, what's yours?" the fucking nerd mumbles, stumbling over his words. He can't even greet someone, what a loser. “I’m Himiko!!” she yells all too loudly, “I’m the manager for the boys basketball team, along with Touya,” a smile that flashes to everyone she meets, appears on her face. “That's cool! I heard y'all are doing well this season!” Izuku says excitedly, staring a toga in awe, as is she some fuckin’ god that come down to grab her five magical wishes.

“Yeah we are! Well… that's if Katsuki can actually play well," Himiko says, laughing to herself, though she shuts up when she glances over to the fucking flare I'm sending her. “Katsuki? Who's Katsuki?" he asks, his eyebrows furrowing a if he's heard the name before, because he has, he just doesn't remember where it's from, I'm guessing anyway.

“T’s me,” I mutter from behind him, he turns around in his seat slowly, his face slightly red, and his ears bright pink.

“Oh, hi I’m Izuku!” he says, stumbling over the simple words, his leg bouncing up and down nervously. “I know,” I say, my voice cold, not caring how it sounds right now. Though the only reason for it is the fact that I sure as hell do not line drama kids, not his looks but holy shit he looks like a God ascending from heaven, “I heard you say that earlier, idiot,"

“Oh… did you… eh… funny…” Izuku stutters, I look down at him like he's a bug under my shoe, something for me to crush. I feel challenged and I do not ever fucking back away from a challenge. You wanna go?

Challenge accepted.

“Oi, nerd. That's my seat,” I say, standing behind freckles, who currently sitting where I sit everyday, and have for the past two years. “Oh? I don't see your name anywhere on it” he says, “and I'm not a nerd,” now where the hell did he get the confidence to actually speak up to me? I look down at him and snicker, “Sure, and I’m a nice person… and it's just a seat. I-zu-ku,” I say.

“You can't sit somewhere else?" he mumbles, staring down at his lap and twiddling his thumbs. I stare down at him, waiting for him to say anything else, try anything else. when he doesn't I respond, “No, I can't, because this is my seat,” I say, the irritation in my voice is prominent. I curl my finger under his chin, tilting his head up to look at me,"You know, it's rude not to look at someone when you talk, nerd."

“fine I'll lea-” he begins to say, before being I cut him off completely, “Y'know what? I'll just sit in front of you.” I flop down in the seat in front of him with enough dramatic ness to make my own eyes roll.

“Ok?” he mutters, confused.

“You're staring… you good, nerd?" I mutter, turning fully in my seat to face him. He stares, just stares at me.

“W-what?!? I didn't say anything,” he mutters quickly, “…um sorry just thinking about… uh.. stuff," he stutters. He seems nervous for no reason, I mean is there a reason to be stuttering? For all I care he could swan dive, I mean maybe not, but it's not like I care. My eyes wander the classroom as he talks until they land back on the nerd.. I start to study him skeptically, wondering why in the absolute hell he's stuttering because I'm…looking at him? His face heats up again, turning a soft red as my eyes bore into his face. I turn back around, twisting a pencil in between my fingers,waiting for the stupid teacher to actually come and do her job.

The teacher begins her boring ass lecture, though I can’t focus a lot because all I feel is two eyes burning holes into my back. At least that's what it feels like. A few minutes go by and the teacher starts to call on students AGAIN to do problems. First she calls on Kaminari who obviously gets it wrong because he's absolutely stupid… Whoops? And then a few more bird brains before her eyes land on freckles, who's currently zoned out.

“Izuku,” the teacher's calls, “Izuku!” louder and more annoying this time. I guess he finally actually realizes he's in a classroom, because he looks up after a few seconds and responds. “U-uh y-yes?!” he says quickly, I can only imagine how embarrassed he is,fucking weirdo. I snicker loudly as he

“solve for x for the problem on the board,” the teacher says in her monotonous voice.

The board says, x 2 - 3|x - 2| - 4x = - 6. Which is fairly annoying, not saying I'm bad at math. I'd actually say I'm pretty good, but I just hate this stupid ass teacher. “X is 0, 1, 3 ,and 4.” he says after a second, which leaves me absolutely stunned because who the fuck answers math problems like that serves her fat ass right, someone who is smarter than you. That's not much to beat but she also has the answer sheet, so.

“Bro, how did you answer that question so fast!" Dunce face yells at full volume, “you should totally tutor me." his voice calls out. “Yeah, dude that was crazy!!” Kirishima also fucking yells from the other side of the classroom. “Ah- t-thank you? I.. um.. w-well math has just always come easy to me.." he mutters. The teacher calls for attention again, still probably slightly stunned but thank fuck for that.

The class continues on, though it's boring as always, I survive it. And before I know it class is over and I'm gathering my crap and waiting for thing 1 and 2 to get their asses over to me like a bunch of sorry ass dogs. I wait as everyone shuffles out the door before turning my attention to Kirishima and Kaminari, who are looking at me expecting something that I'm certainly not going to give them. Whatever it is. Instead I scoff and march out the door to the hundreds of students shoving their way through the hallways. I roll my eyes and begin to push through the herd of people, not voicing two rats asses about if I hurt a extra because I genuinely don't care. Kirishima and Kaminari follow behind me, before splitting off and going to their own lockers. I open mine, the door squeaking as I shove my books in it and slam it closed.

“So… How do you like the new kid?" Kaminari asks, sneaking up from beside me. Kirishima joins in a few seconds later appearing to my left. “I couldn't give two fucks about him, hes annoying and he's in drama. Literally two things I utterly hate," I snap back, starting to walk to the cafeteria.

“Really? I thought he was nice, plus he was super smart when he was answering the teacher's question…” Kirishima mutters, Kaminari nodding his head in agreement.

“That's because y'all are the textbook definition of stupid, get your head out of your asses for one second would you?” I say, shoving my hands into the pockets of my basketball shorts. Kirishima rolls his eyes and bumps my arm with his, and Kaminari just scoffs.

I continue on, “he's in drama, now why the hell did he have to join drama? What a fucking moron, plus he basically has an afro on the top of his head, almost fucking bigger than Pinky's,”I bark, rolling my eyes at the sheer stupidity of the nerd. I look forward, towards the doors of the cafeteria, when all of a sudden I see a mop of green hair. Who is looking at me, he quickly avoids eye contact and follows Pink Cheeks into the cafeteria. Shit, guess he heard that. Not that I care.

Chapter Text

I stare at my schedule, the feeling of dread seeping into my heart and bones. The only thing keeping me from actually running out of this blanc classroom, is that I do in fact need to go to college so I can actually make a wage in the unlivable world.

“It isn’t.. that bad..” Uraraka, my first actual friend at UA said. She was pretty. She had nice hair, and a smile, and she was always blushing at the smallest things. Cute. But she was horrible at encouragement.

“But it very much is that bad” I reply dryly. Him.Why was he in every. Single. One. Of. My. Classes. This was horrible! I mean what person is unlucky enough that the person you get told should stay away from is in every single one of my classes.

“He’s not horrible… He's just a little.. overbearing.. and stubborn” Uraraka tries, “I mean when he's with his friends he isn't that bad, and he's handsome… Kinda annoying when all the girls are fawning over him.”

I sink down into my chair, a soft pout on my face. "Ochako…if I don't come to school tomorrow, I'm dead” I whine, my nerves getting the best of me, so I shove my head into my arms on my desk to hide my face. She laughs softly, trying to hide the concerned look she shoots at me.

“I mean at least he saved the ball from hitting your face??” Ochako tries to help the situation but at this point it's just making the whole situation worse. That is so embarrassing, and he totally looked at me with utter disgust.

“Oh. My. God. How am I going to face him after that? I was practically glowing red!!” I sink further into my chair, wishing the ground would open up and swallow me whole so I don't have to deal with these awkward situations.

There’s a loud laugh from across the room, the yellow haired guy from earlier the source. He’s doubling over in his chair, laughing at the red head, whose face was now the same color as his hair. And then another loud laugh as the yellow haired guy falls from his seat and into the floor. On his head. That looked like it hurt. What in the world is wrong with that guy??

I see the blonde guy from earlier too. He looks just as pissed off, if not even more. He was glaring at the yellow haired guy. He looks mad, he looked like that earlier when he was talking to his friends. Maybe he always looks like that? Kinda scary, but he kinda fi… No, I will not do this to myself.

Suddenly our eyes meet, and I realize I've been staring at these 3 guys for the past 4 minutes. I quickly avert my eyes, and I could feel heat creeping up my neck, dusting my face. I can feel his eyes tracking me and I slowly sink further into my seat.

“Hey! You’re the new kid! Wow, you’re cute..!” a high pitched voice startles me out of my thoughts. My body jumps, the voice pulling me from my thoughts and roughly pushing me into reality.

“Oh.. hi um, my name's Izuku, what's yours?" I say, stumbling over my words, I can't greet anybody now? WhateverI'll just cover it up with a wobbly smile, and only hope she doesn't think I’m weird.

“I’m Himiko!!” She said excitedly. “I’m the manager for the boys basketball team, along with Touya,” she says with a bright smile spreading across her face. She's super cute, like a little sister would be.

“That's cool! I heard y'all are doing well this season!” I say. Honestly, from what I saw earlier, I don't know if those 3 guys can play well together. They all look like they would trip on their own 2 feet.

“Yeah we are! Well… that's if Katsuki can actually play well," Himiko says, laughing to herself. She suddenly shuts up glancing over to where the three guys were sitting earlier.

“Katsuki? Who's Katsuki?" I ask. It sounds familiar… maybe I heard it at the gym? Or the music room… I don't remember.

“T’s me,” A voice rings from behind me, low and rough. His voice was hot. At that thought, my cheeks flare, and I feel the heat burning my whole face. I want to crawl in the hole and die. I know exactly who it is, even before I turn around. I heard it in the gym. I don’t want to turn around, but I guess I have to die sooner or later. I was right. It’s him. Blonde. Angry. Gorgeous.

I want to punch him, but I’m not sure how I would manage that when my voice won’t even work, much less my pathetic fist. “Oh, hi I’m Izuku!" I say, tripping and falling over those 4 sorry, deplorable sounding words.

“I know,” he says, his voice biting. I feel like he doesn’t like me but I’m not sure I can even begin to wonder why. “I heard you say that earlier, idiot," I have the urge to punch him again, but I don’t, because one, I’m a nice person. Two, It wouldn’t do anything anyways, and three, if something did happen, it wouldn’t be to him. I’d be in the hospital with a shattered hand. At that I allow myself a glance and I hate myself for it. I can’t fathom my own idiocy. I glance at his arms, his poor shirt, struggling for its life against his biceps. Damn. I look back up. There’s no way I’m still the color of human flesh.

“Oh… did you… eh… funny…” I try, swallowing so hard I think I’m choking. I can’t breathe. I don’t like this man with every fiber of my being and I’m not sure why. He’s looking at me like I’m some little bug again. Well guess what, asshole? I can step on bugs too. We’ll see who’s foot comes down and crushes the other first.

Challenge accepted.

Something most people don’t know about me is that I love a challenge, and most times I win them. Another thing people don’t know is that I’m crazy fast. Running around the stage for drama club is the main reason I train my quads. It gets tiring.

One of the reasons I joined this school was because they have the best drama club in the region. I love drama. I always have, ever since I saw my favorite actor, Gran Torino, perform Hamilton live, when I was seven. That’s the other reason I wanted to go here. When my mom finally said yes to me joining this school, I may have shed a few tears.

Ochako showed me where all my classes were, which I desperately needed because I was late to my first 3. I refuse to be late to this one, even though I don’t want to be in this class. Math. I hate math. And HIM. I don’t like him and I still don’t know why. I want to punch him and get to know him and beat him at whatever game he’s trying to play all at the same time, and I don’t know how I’m going to live when we have all the same classes. I might have to go to the principal to change my classes.

I’ve finally arrived at my class. I smile at the teacher and make my way quickly to the first empty desk I see, and sit down with a heavy sigh, putting my head down and burying my face in my arms “Oi, nerd. That's my seat,” a rough voice says beside me.

I’m going to actually commit today. Of course it’s his seat. I lift my head up, looking up at who I am supposed to “Oh? I don't see your name anywhere on it” I say, somehow finding confidence, “and I'm not a nerd”

Katsuki looks down at me, and snickers “sure, and I’m a nice person… and it's just a seat. I-zu-ku” I try to glare at him, but I can feel myself turning impossibly more red. Why did he say my name like that…? And why am I totally into it…?

“You can't sit somewhere else?" I mumble, staring down at my lap. I can feel his red eyes on me, and I wish I could muster the courage to glare back at him, but I physically can’t.

“No, I can't, because this is my seat,” Katsuki says, the irritation in his voice obvious. and then he does something that makes me want to punch him and spend every waking moment next to him. He puts his finger under my chin, tilting my head up to look at him,"You know, it's rude not to look at someone when you talk, nerd”

I'm going to spontaneously combust. Why. Is. He. So. HOT? It should not be like this. I shouldn’t feel like this. I hate myself. Why can’t I control my own emotions? Why am I blushing? A soft pout appears on my face, “fine I'll lea-” I begin to say, before being rudely cut off.

“Y'know what? I'll just sit in front of you” he says, interrupting me. He flops down in the seat in front of me with enough dramatics to make me roll my eyes. He really did all that work, just to suddenly decide he'll let me sit here? What was the point…?

“Ok?” I say, confused. He’s weird. He makes me feel weird, and I don’t like it. He makes me feel violent. Overwhelmingly violent, and I’m not an aggressive person. He also makes my insides tingle. Like a buzzing feeling. Maybe I’m going to explode. That’d actually be great right now. He actually makes my insides feel like they're going to explode. It's all warm and fuzzy inside and I don't think I like it.

“You're staring… you good, nerd?" He asked, turning in his seat to look at me with those crimson red eyes. Holy moly. His eyes are pretty. That word was disrespectful. Stunning. They remind me of lava, or fire, or his best friend's hair. I wonder if they're dating… Not that I care. I'm not jealous, I'm not.

“Your eyes are pretty," I mumble before I can stop myself. What an idiot you are, Izuku. What have I just said? This man has stripped me of any common sense I may have had. I have actually lost it in one day. One. Day. Who even is this guy?

“What?" Katsuki responds, he looks stunned and also a bit confused. Maybe he didn't hear me? I hope he didn’t. Maybe he’s deaf and it’s my lucky day.

“W-what?!? I didn't say anything,” I say quickly, “…um sorry just thinking about… uh.. stuff," I stutter. Why am I stuttering?? Dying sounds so appealing right about now. Why does he make me feel this way? I don’t even know him!

He looks at me skeptically, and I might actually die. I’m starting to want to. I can feel his eyes boring into me, and my face is burning, and I’m underwater and suffocating and on fire all at the same time. Until I’m not. He turns around, and all I’m left with is the realization that this guy isn’t like anyone else I’ve ever met, and the sight of his gorgeous back.

The teacher then begins the lesson but I can’t hear her. I can’t hear anything but my heart trying to reincarnate a drumline and my thoughts that I wish had stayed in the water while I was drowning a few moments ago. I stare at his back, trying to convince myself he isn’t gorgeous.

But he is.

“Izuku,” the teacher's voice rang out, “Izuku!” louder this time. I finally realize that I’m still in class. I wish I was somewhere else besides this jejune classroom in this excruciatingly uncomfortable seat. Anywhere else. But I’m stuck here. For another 45 minutes.

I realize I haven’t responded to the teacher. Um… Uh oh.

“U-uh y-yes?!” I say quickly, slightly embarrassed. I turn impossibly more red. I hear snickering from the seat in front of me. Of course that jerk is laughing. Freak you Katsuki.

“solve for x for the problem on the board,” the teacher says in her monotonous voice. This woman’s voice is impossibly more annoying than the jerk in front of me.

The board says, x 2 - 3|x - 2| - 4x = - 6. Easy.

X can be equal to 0, 1, 3 , or 4.” I say quickly. Math has always come quickly to me. There’s never really been a problem I couldn't figure out.

The teacher looks stunned, which is a normal reaction I guess. Most of the students did too. I can feel myself growing warm again.

“Bro, how did you answer that question so fast!" Kaminari yells a bit too loud, “you should totally tutor me." his voice rings out around the room and I wouldn't be surprised if people could hear him from outside. “Yeah, dude that was crazy!!” Kirishima yells from the other side of the classroom. I hadn’t even noticed the 2 of them were in here.

I know I’m blushing like an idiot, and I wish I wasn’t. I wipe my clammy palms on my pants, swallowing thickly. I hate compliments. “Ah- t-thank you? I.. um.. w-well math has just always come easy to me.." I mutter. I can feel them all looking at me. I hate it.

I lay my head down in embarrassment after the teacher gathers everybody's attention and class starts back again. Four seconds back into the lesson and the teacher gives me back my unfathomable boredom, and the class robs me of any dignity I may have had left. The time goes from seconds to minutes until finally the forty-five antagonizing minutes of uncontrolled boredom is over and the lunch bell finally rings. The noise brings me to my senses, jolting me up from the thoughts in my mind.
I stand up from my desk, grabbing my books from the floor. Ochako, who's now beside me, waits for me before we walk to the door. Everyone shuffles out of class, well, besides Katsukis group. I quickly follow after Ochako as she walks out the door and into the crowded hallway. We push our way through the hallway and to our lockers, though I don't actually push anyone, I neatly stack my book and close my locker. Walkin up to beside ochako as she places her stuff into the cramped locker in front of her. My eyes begin to wander as I wait, up until they land on a certain spiky haired person, who just elbowed a person. He slams open his locker, the hinges squeaking as he does so, shoving his stuff in and then slamming it shut again. A couple students around him flinch or give him a weird look before walking away. Kaminari walks up to Katsuki, his mouth opening as though he's about to say something, so I do the most humanly thing possible and listen in.

“So… How do you like the new kid?" Kaminari asks, standing beside him. Kirishima walks up not long after, standing off to Katsukis left. “I couldn't give two fucks about him, hes annoying and he's in drama. Literally two things I utterly hate," Katsukis barks, starting to walk towards the cafeteria. My body tenses as I hear them start to talk. Ochako looks up following my eyes.

“Everything okay?” she asks, closing her locker and walking closer towards me."uh… Yeah just heard them talking… L-lets follow them, like now,” I mutter walking off to the side of them, Ochako looks at me confused before accepting what I said and following close behind me.

“Really? I thought he was nice, plus he was super smart when he was answering the teacher's question…” Kirishima mutters, Kaminari nodding his head in agreement.

“That's because y'all are the textbook definition of stupid, get your head out of your asses for one second would you?”Katsuki says, shoving his hands into the front pockets of his basketball shorts, and then he continues again, “he's in drama, now why the hell did he have to join drama? What a fucking moron, plus he basically has an afro on the top of his head, almost fucking bigger than Pinky's,” he barks, I feel my heart drop. The pain of realizing he's talking about me. I turn around, Ochako already starting the way to the cafeteria. I faintly hear Katsuki still talking, though it's about a whole different subject, not that it matters or that I was listening.

As we sit down, our trays still in hand, Ochako introduces me to some of her friends. The first is Tenya Iida, who is fairly tall and talks in a robotic manner. He's president of the senior student body and is on track. The next is Tsuyu Asui who is more soft spoken and less direct than Iida is. Her hair’s green like mine but more bright. Shoto Todoroki, he's on the basketball team and also seems to be a shy person. I've also learned that his brother is the vice coach for the team along with Toga. Ochako said that Toga is off sitting with the boys today, though she usually sits with them. Last but definitely not least is Aoyama who seems to love sparkly stuff, because literally everything he's wearing is sparkly, which is honestly surprising considering we have school uniforms.

I play with my food, not in the mood to eat lunch. Ochako says something though it passes through one ear and out the other, I'm guessing it's important because now for some reason she's basically yelling my name and hitting my shoulder. “U-uh…what? Sorry I was zoned out…" I mutter, my fork clattering against my tray from me dropping it.

“I was gonna sky you something but now i'm curious what's on your mind…” Ochako says, a smirk on her face, “crush? Did you find someone you like already?" My face flushes at the question, because I mean that's kind of embarrassing. “No!! No it's just um… I heard Katsuki talking bad about me so…I mean it was something about me joining drama or something," I say.

“Oh… Yeah I can see why he would, don't worry he did the same thing with Mina when she said she was the dance coach for drama. He’ll get over it, Izuku don't worry your pretty little head about it,” Ochako says, her hand patting my head gently, and the conversation between everyone continues.

Chapter Text

“You’re failing,” Says the teacher.

And now I’m pissed off again. “What?” I snap, leaning back in the chair the teacher had situated in front of her desk like she was fuckin’ interrogating my ass. I’m supposed to be at after school basketball practice, goddamnit! This is bullshit!

“You’re failing my class. You have a 58” She says to me, as if she’s explaining this information to an incompetent toddler. I want to beat the shit out of this annoying woman.

“So? What is talking to me going to do,” I bite out, and watch in satisfaction as irritation sets hard in her jaw. Good, I’m pissing her off.

“I’m going to assign you a tutor” She said pointedly, straightening out a stack of papers.

“Who?” I ask, though I think I already know, and I’m not sure who I’m going to kill first, this woman, myself, or that green haired little shit.

“You know the new student, Izuku Midoriya? I think he’d be a great tutor for you” The bitch says. The sheer audacity of this woman makes me want to laugh.

“You’re funny” I say, crossing my arms across my chest, “I’m serious, that’s a great joke.”

“I can sense there may be some… tension, or whatever, between you two… but I’m afraid I’m being serious. He has the best math grades in the whole school, and he’s tested as one of the most advanced students in math in the whole region. Plus, this’ll be a great bonding experience for the both of you”

Well, if I didn’t have a reason to kill myself before, I sure as hell do now. This is my 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, 9th, 10th, 11th, 12th, and 13th reasons all in one. What the actual fuck. I stand up. Snatch up my bookbag dramatically. I can feel this woman glaring at me and I love the fact that she’s pissed off at me. I glare back at her.

“Whatever” I snap.

“It’s decided, whether you like it or not!” She says as I walk out, slamming the door behind me.

Bitch

I storm down the hallway, on the way to yet another basketball practice. Yagi would never gives us a break this soon before nationals, even though it’s a whole ass 4 months or so away. That is if I can get my shit together enough to get us to nationals.

I hear music. And laughter. And a voice that shouldn’t feel familiar to me. But it is. And it’s beautiful.

I stop. I’m outside the damn theater, and I can’t stop myself from peeking inside. There he is. That damn nerd. I have to get to practice, but I can’t seem to move my legs. I can’t take my eyes off his graceful movements. How does he do that? He looks so… different. Free. Glowing. Breathtaking.

I watch his feet. Every step is purposeful and confident, unlike when he’s walking around the school. How can he be so confident up there, and such a pussy anywhere else? Is this little fuck even real?

This isn’t fair. How is he so graceful? He looks so carefree, and I can’t even focus on making a basket without tripping on my own fuck ass feet when I'm mad. I wonder if he ever gets mad. With how he looks and how graceful he is, I wouldn't give a second thought if the answer was no.

I should be looking away. I should be going to practice. So many things I should be doing, but I can’t seem to do them. I can't take my eyes off of the dancing figure on stage, the light illuminating his features. It's like he's floating down from the heavens above gracing me with his breathtaking presence.

Especially with that voice. His voice. It’s almost as if he's an angel. He’s got the fucking trumpets playing a soft tune as he gracefully dances across stage. Fuck me. I can't even think. Why was I even mad? I want him to tutor me. I want to get to know him, and I want him. Fuck. I am so cooked.

His gorgeous green eyes meet mine, and I watch as they widen. I wish something else would widen. Just kidding

“O-oh, Ka-cchan!!!” He trips. What the fuck did he just call me? Did he call me that on purpose?? Kacchan?? Maybe that was an accident? Though, I wouldn't mind if he called me that, it's kinda… cute?

“Who is Kacchan??” One of the other extras says. A big guy. I could take him in a fight. He should join the basketball team, he has the height.

Izuku’s turning a bright red and I might just die right here. He’s so fucking cute when he’s embarrassed. There goes every once of my self preservation. My name is now Kacchan fucking Bakugo. I swallow. “Me, apparently.” I say. Izuku looks up at me again.

“Since when do you guys have nicknames?” Pink cheeks speaks up. Fucker. Her annoying ass self always has to comment in her annoying ass voice whenever nobody fucking wants her to speak. Izuku looks over at pink cheeks, and I hate myself, but I want him to look back at me, not her. Don’t look at her. Focus on me. Only me.

Izuku stands up, dusting off his shirt. “Uh… well he calls me a nerd. It’s only fair…right?” Izuku says, glaring at me. Or at least tries to. He’s blushing like a maniac. He’s so fucking cute. He does something else and I think I might explode. He sticks out his fucking tongue at me. And all I think about is him, wrapping it around my dick. Motherfucking fuck.

I’m fucking flushing. I’m blushing like a teenage girl who just saw her first naked man, and I need to leave, right now. The air is getting thick around me and I feel like I'm going to explode. In my pants. Shit. Fuck. Leaving. Right. Now.

“Well.. whatever nerd. Go back to whatever you were doing. I have to go to basketball practice” I say quickly, turning to leave. But the little shit stops me.

“W-wait, Kacchan! Did the teacher tell you that I was supposed to tutor you? When.. do you um.. want to do that?” He asks. He’s so cute when he’s nervous.

“I don’t give a fuck” I snap quickly. I really need to get out of here. Now.

“Well how about I come over after your basketball practice so you have time to think about it and so we can talk about it.. later? In a more appropriate situation?” He says. I can’t think about anything that I want more than to see him again after this, but he can’t know that. I can’t let myself know that either, or I’m done for. So I shove it into a box and lock it up and throw it away.

I shrug. “Whatever. Fine” I say coldly. God, I’m a dick. Why am I such a fucking dick.

“W-well… when does it end?” he asks. Fuck. He sounds sad, and he must thing I'm a fucking asshole, because I am. I don't want to be. This is just the way I act and I can't fucking control it.

“6:30” I say. I walk out. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t look at him anymore because he’s so fucking attractive, but he’s in fucking drama club and I can’t think like this. I can’t. I can’t do that again. I can't do that again. That was the biggest fucking mistake of my life. But you will. The sick, disgusting part of my brain whispers. I hate it. I hate that. I hate this. I would’ve thrown up if I was in there a second longer.

I walk into the gym to a ball flying by my head and slamming into the other door literally 3 inches away from my head.

“Augh, damn, sorry dude! That wasn't very manly of me!” Kirishima says, jogging over. He picks up the basketball as I set down my bag and start changing my shoes.

“So are you actually going to play like you know what the hell you’re doing, or are you going to fuck up again, like always?” Shinsou comments. He’s always talking when nobody wants his fucking opinion.

“I know you’re not talking eyebags, you suck so bad at passing you literally almost knocked out the nerd” I shoot back, "you could've hurt the damn thing if it wasn't for me.” That seems to shut him up enough, and he walks away. Thank fucking God.

Practice sucks, as usual when I’m pissed off. I can’t fucking focus. I wish I could enjoy basketball as much as I did before that thing cheated.

Everyone else has gone back into the locker room and left. I hear the door open as soon as I jump to shoot. I don’t care. I’m trying to focus, but I can’t, and my legs aren’t working and fuck. I miss.

“Wow, you kinda suck” his gorgeous, angelic voice says to me. Goddamn it. I turn to look at him. I watch his expression change from amused to embarrassed in seconds, and a wave of satisfaction washes through me, dancing around in circles with my anger.

“Shut the fuck up, nerd” I snap. I know he’s right, but I’d rather die than admit that to him.

“I’m not trying to be mean, Kacchan, I’m just saying. You’re really stiff. And you look mad. You should try calming down some, it’d really help” he says, like he’s so experienced in basketball.

Probably now better than you at being graceful, though. My brain says. I hate that part of my brain. It can go suck someone off. “Shut up. You don’t know what you’re talking about” I say.

“Uh.. I mean I kinda do” Izuku says. Since when is he confident? He starts again, “w-well you know I'm in drama, and a part of that is being graceful. Being stiff is probably the reason you're missing. You have too much stuff running through your mind, and you aren’t focusing on everything altogether. You just need to relax some. Your form is perfect. It's just that you're stiff when you're moving, running, and shooting…" Izuku keeps rambling on, and I think I'm starting to realize that he is right. Of course the damn nerd is.

I look at him for a moment, my eyes softening slightly from the earlier glare. I can tell that he's starting to regret his words as soon as he stops talking. Which took him a while.

“You’re right," I say softly, “I have been stressed lately.” Because of that stupid hag and that stupid slut. Everything was going so fucking smooth and I was fucking amazing, until that stupid whore ruined everything.

Izuku just stares at me like I’ve just told him I identify as a purple polka dotted microwave that eats rainbows and shits glitter.

“You what?” He asks. I almost say the microwave part out loud.

“Oh, uh.. You’re right. I’m stressed.” I repeat. He’s staring again, and I don’t want him to look away. I don’t want his eyes to leave mine, I don’t care if that makes me weak.

“Oh.. well.. When you’re playing.. It’s important to keep a level head. Hold on.. Let me um… show you…” he steps forward, and takes the ball out of my hands. He walks over to the 3 point line, and sighs. “Now… this isn’t going to be pretty… but block me” he says. But anything is pretty when you do it.

I just look at him. I don’t think my brain is moving fast enough..”What?” I ask. I’m so confused and I feel like an absolute idiot because all I can think about is how gorgeous he is. Fuck.

“I’m gonna show you how to play your own sport, ka-cchan” He says. This guy. He grins at me. “What, do you not have the balls for it?” the fuck? When this guy get the balls and confidence to say this…

He’s actually trying to kill me. I glare. “Whatever, nerd. Just get ready for me to kick your ass,” I say confidently.

“Mhm.. okay” He says. When I get into position, he grins at me and I’m going to explode. He’s so cute. “Ready?” he asks, and I can only nod and hope I don’t look like the rag on shitty hair’s head that he calls his hair. Fucking dead ass piece of shit. Doesn't even need fuckin hair gel to make it stand up.

Suddenly he’s moving. He’s moving and I wasn’t expecting it and I can’t keep up. He’s behind me. No, he's not. He never was. It was a fake. He's in front of me and he's jumping, and makes a 3 pointer like he’s been playing’ ball since he popped out of his mom. What the actual fuck is happening right now. I have no idea if I’m turned on or if I just got the absolute shit humbled out of me. Or both.

“The fuck was that” I snap. He grins at me and the whole world disappears around us. All I can see is him. And his freckles. All 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 of them. And his eyes. His hair. His everything. Fuck.

“Oh.. um.. Sorry, I used to date someone who plays basketball, so I know a thing or two about basketball…” Izuku says softly, a blush spreading on his cheeks. Date? I feel jealousy slice its way through my veins. It’s boiling and scorching every fiber of my being. Who the hell is worthy enough to date Izuku? I want to ask him who he dated. But I don’t. I won’t put myself in that situation. Not again. Never again. Not after that cunt.

We stare at each other for a long moment. I hope I’m glaring at him. I hope I’m not blushing. I hope he doesn’t see right fucking through me. This is absolute shit. I want to fucking make out with him. But I can’t. So instead I turn and walk over to the bench that's a few feet over, grab my water bottle, squirting some in my mouth. He’s staring at me. I can feel him staring at me. And I fucking love it.

“You’re staring nerd,” I say after swallowing the water in my mouth. I thought he would stop staring, but he didn't. He keeps looking, like he's studying me. Studying my features as if he's taking an exam on me. I drop my water bottle on the bench and tilt my head, looking at him.

He starts blushing, and I feel my insides explode. My heart explodes. I feel like I need to take a few shots to knock the edge off. (Don't drink kids, it's bad)

“Oh.. my bad” he says. “Well… anyways.. About tutoring.. I.. when are we doing those?” He asks. Fuck. I have not been thinking about that at all and all I can think about is him and his fucking beautiful freckles, bit beautiful face, and his lips. Oh… Did I just think about that? God fucking damn it.

“Um- any day besides Monday through Wednesday. I have practice then.” I say. Practice, which I'm lowkey hating because of my stress, based on what Izuku said anyway. I think I could ask him for help with that, but I don't think we are that close. Fuck it.

“Oh- same for me” he says. Thank the Lord. I am not skipping practices for a stupid teacher. Respectfully, go back to the fucking fields, you cow. Actually not respectfully I fucking hate you. Go kill yourself. I fucking hate how you look, how you talk, walk, eat, and fucking teach your class. I am a d1 hater. Till the day I die.

“Well, whatever. Thursdays are fine, I guess.” I say. Only day I'm actually free, since Fridays are my drumming lessons. But he doesn't need to know that. That just means my whole week for however long tutoring takes is going to be full. Great. No free time besides on the weekend. Though I don't mind spending it with Izuku, even though I'm supposed to hate him.

“Okay, Kacchan” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. He’s always blushing. It’s cute. “Well… um.. I should get goi-” He gets cut off and the lights in the school shut off. Fuck. And he yelps. The fuck? Is he scared of the dark or something?

“Are you… scared of the dark?” I ask with a frown, even though he can’t see my expression. He’s quiet for a moment. Izuku’s scared of the dark… Fuck that's cute for no reason at all. What the hell is wrong with me?

“Well… I’m sure you don’t know your way around. So come on, nerd” I say, sighing and reaching out, grabbing his wrist. Well, I tried to grab his wrist. I overestimated how tall he was. I was at his elbow, and I missed. Fuck me. I grab the nerd by the waist. He squeaks, and I want to pull my hand away. I really do. But he can’t know I just fucked up, can he? So I own it. I shifted it casually to rest on his back, and guided him towards the exit of the gym.

We walk down the halls a bit, before the light coming from the glass doors of the building illuminates the hallway. I glance down, finally able to see his face, now illuminated by the light. He’s blushing like a fucking maniac. I love it, but I don’t want to. So I look away and stare at the ground as we walk, my hand still on his back.

We walk out of the building, and I pull my hand away, hoping my reluctance isn’t obvious. I expect him to say something, anything to make this less awkward. I see Izuku shiver slightly, soft snow covering his face. His beautiful face. Like glitter added to a beautiful painting. Part of me wants to wipe the snow off, so not a single feature is covered. I want to see all of his face, no matter how little is covered. I realize I’m just staring again, and I clear my throat, looking away. I expect him to turn and walk away, leaving like most people do.

But he doesn't. Instead he turns towards me and starts playing with the hem of his shirt. “C-could you walk home with me…? I don't usually go home this late alone and my mom’s always talking about the dangers at night so that's always freaked me out. And sorry, I just don't like walking home on my own in the dark. It scares me… And I think you could tell that in the gym I'm scared of the dark…"

“Stop talking, nerd!!” I snap. “Stop! Yes, I’ll fucking walk you home!” He rambles, like a lot. And it's driving me insane. Would it also be insane to say that I kinda like it when he rambles. It's fairly cute. His lips look so soft right now I just want to…fuck no.

He looks up at me, his eyes widening slightly. He swallows, and I watch his Adam's apple bob up and down. Jesus. “O-okay. Thanks, Kacchan,” Izuku says. His eyes glimmered slightly more than they did earlier.

“Whatever, nerd” We start walking. Everything is normal, everything’s great. Just fuckin’ peachy. Until I realize I’m not following him anymore. I know this route by instinct. Because I walk it every day.

“Kacchan… how do you know the way to my house…?” He asks slightly scared, breaking me out of my thoughts of no one with green hair and green eyes and 8 freckles, 4 on each cheek.

“Your house? This is the way to my.. My house,” I say, stopping in my tracks, I look at my house, to my left, and then down at Izuku, who’s looking at the house directly across the street from mine.

“What. The. Fuck.” I say.

Izuku’s eyes meet mine. Green to red.

“We’re neighbors?!” we say in unison.

Chapter Text

I always feel so free when I’m dancing. I feel like I'm flying, as if I'm a bird gliding through the sky. Not a care in the world. I feel as if I'm in sync with everything around me, in perfect harmony with all of my surro-

“No! No! No! Again!” Mina says from the side of the stage. “Izuku, you seem distracted. Your movements and dancing are perfecto, bon appetit, scrumptious, but you look so uncomfortable, like you’ve got a stick up your ass. Try to feel the music, don’t just dance to it. Again!!”

I nod, shoving down the annoyance steadily building in the center of my chest, tightening itself into an impossibly obnoxious force that is unable to be ignored. The music starts again, and so do I.

Feel the damn music, Izuku! I let myself relax, listening to the melodic tunes sifting through the air like grains of golden sand, and I let myself feel it. Mina’s right, this is better. The routine is almost over. I can do this! Stick the landing!

I make a horrible mistake. I open my eyes. And he’s there, devouring all of my attention, consuming it like it’s his and he owns it. It’s…

Katsuki! “Ka-” I trip. Please kill me, “-Cchan!!” and I fall on my face. Great. That jerk just watched me fall on my face. How much crueler can this world’s humor possibly get?

“Who is Kacchan?” Inasa barks with a laugh that’s impossibly louder than his speaking voice. That man wasn’t capable of a volume below screaming. Apparently the world’s cruelty can get much worse.

“Me, apparently,” Katsuki says from the doorway. What in the world? Maybe I’m dreaming. This is absolutely surreal. I nearly just broke something just because I saw him, and now he’s up there, owning the accidental nickname Kacchan like it’s his government name. Who IS this guy?? Why do I feel so warm and clammy? I feel myself flushing, and I hate myself for my weakness.

“Since when do you guys have nicknames?” Ochako asks, smiling. She’s so beautiful when she smiles, and it makes me happy because she always smiles at me. It makes me feel good inside when she smiles at me. I realize she’s asked a question.

What has my life become? I sigh and stand up, dusting off my shirt. Jesus, Izuku, you’re so pathetic. But Kaccham can’t know that. I can’t let Kacchan beat me at whatever this is. No way. So, I do something I’m excellent at doing. Something that’s almost as easy to me as math. I do something unbelievably stupid.

“Uh… well he calls me a nerd. It’s only fair, right?” I shoot a pointed look at Katsuki, and I hope like hell that my glare is more noticeable than the red I know is painting my face. I probably look stupid right now. Then again, when do I not? Might as well own it, right?

I stick my tongue out at him. I’m not sure if it’s my dignity being ripped away, or my ego inflating, but I watch as Katsuki loses his composure, frowning at me, and maybe it’s the stage lights playing tricks on me, but his face is beginning to try and match the color of his stunning eyes.

I see him take deep breaths, school his expression, and glare at me. But then he looks away. Why did he look away? Don’t look away! Look at me! Only me!

“Well.. whatever nerd. Go back to whatever you were doing. I have basketball practice” he says, and it sounds like he’s in a hurry to leave. In a hurry to get away from me, and I don’t want that. I’m selfish and I know it. I don’t want him to get away from me.

“W-wait, Kacchan! Did the teacher tell you that I was supposed to tutor you? When.. do you um.. Want to do that?” I ask. When did I start calling him that? I can feel my nerves eating me from the inside out. Maybe they won’t stop, and I can finally escape my own idiocy.

“I don’t give a fuck” he bites out at me. I have a feeling he doesn’t want to talk to me right now and I’m not sure what to do so I do the thing that makes the most sense. To me, anyway. Most likely, 75% of all my decisions may have me on the short, bumpy road to an insane asylum.

“Well how about I come over after your basketball practice so you have time to think about it and so we can talk about it.. later? In a more appropriate situation?” I ask. Maybe I’m not as smart as I think. How do I always end up in these situations with the blonde guys? First Monoma, now Kacc- Katsuki. His name is Katsuki.

I watch as he shrugs. He shrugs, as if I’d just asked if he likes hamburgers or hot dogs better. “Whatever. Fine” he says, his tone chilling me to the bone. Why did I think he’d want to hang out with me? He doesn’t like me. He never has, you idiot. So why does it hurt like this?

I’m struggling to keep this conversation going. He’s so… closed off, and empty, it’s hard to tell what he’s thinking. I wish I knew.. “W-well… when will it end?” I ask, trying to get a chance to discuss tutoring in place before he marches off, ego in tow. It isn’t because I want to see him again. Not at all. I would never want that. He’s a jerk. Kacchan is a jerk.

“6:30” He bites out. It aches. Why does it feel like this? I don’t need his approval. I’m better than him. He can’t beat me. Can he? So why does it feel like he's going to beat me? Why does it feel like he's better than me?

“Anyways… Now that that rude interruption from Bakugou is out of your gorgeous hair, let's get back to dancing! You were doing great!” Mina says, jumping up and down. Kinda thanking her right now, because all I need to do right now is get my mind off of everything and dance, sing, and relax.

I let out a sigh, and grin at her. I hope it looks genuine.

The music began, and I could feel my body begin to relax. As the beat of the music starts to reach its climax, I jump and land a barrel turn. As soon as my foot lands, the beat drops and I shift my foot to fall on the floor and the music slowly fades out. My breathing is heavy and ragged, and I look at Mina who's staring at me like I'm crazy.

“YOU CAN HIT A BARREL TURN??” she screeches. I’m quite sure she just broke the sound barrier. Either that or my ears. I may be permanently deaf. Goodbye music, and my dog’s bark, and the sound of Katsuki’s voice.. I’m done for. I glance around. Most of the people are staring at me and I can feel my cheeks slowly heat up.

“U-uh- yeah? I was in ballet when I was little so that's helped me a little with my dancing.." more like a lot. The only reason I can dance is because of my ballet lessons, but I won't say that. There are a lot of things I won’t say. Can’t say.

“Wow, that's awesome! You know I us-” Mina started, but I can’t hear her anymore. My eyes snag on the clock. 6:45. How did I lose track of time? What if he isn’t there and he’s mad at me? Well, more angry than he usually is. He always seems to be angry. I try to swallow the thickness in my throat, but it just gets worse.

“Um… anyways… Mina, I’ll chat with you later on the choreography for the play? You said that was in about 6 months, right? Well… anyways, we’ll chat later, I just remembered my mom is making katsudon for dinner! Bye!” I turn, and walk out of the theatre.

That was so awkward! Why did I rush out like that? They’re going to think something is wrong with you, you idiot! I walk into the hallway, and glance around. Um… Left… or right? Or was it straight…? I'm going to be so late. Kacchan is going to kill me. I might as well just tell him to meet me at the graveyard instead of the gym.

Well, it’s only 3 directions. That’s basically a 33.3% chance for each hallway. How bad could it be?

Apparently very, very bad. It took me 15 minutes and at least all my cardio for the whole week to find this damn gym. When I walk in, he’s flying, going to make a shot. His form is stunning. He looks so in his element… but something is off. He shoots, and he misses. I didn’t even know he was capable of messing something up. He seems so perfect, so amazing. How is someone so perfect able to miss?

I sigh, regaining my composure. I’m sure as hell gonna need it. “Wow, you kinda suck,” I say. I watch as he turns to look at me. As soon as his scarlet red eyes meet mine, I can feel the thin barrier of composure that I worked too hard to maintain completely disappear. I lose my amusement, sifting over to embarrassment.

“Shut the fuck up, nerd” He snaps at me. He’s glaring at me as if I’d just insulted his mother.

“I’m not trying to be mean, Kacchan, I’m just saying. You’re really stiff. And you look mad. You should try calming down some, it’d really help” I try to encourage, but his glare only darkens. Oh boy, I’ve stepped out of line and I’m pretty sure that line is about to explode all together. Me included.

“Shut up. You don’t know what you’re talking about” He says to me. Jerk.

“Uh.. I mean I kinda do,” I say. I look at his expression, and I flush, quickly starting over, “w-well you know I'm in drama, and a part of that is being graceful. Being stiff is probably the reason you're missing. You have too much stuff running through your mind, and you aren’t focusing on everything altogether. You just need to relax some. Your form is perfect. It's just that you're stiff when you're moving, running, and shooting…" I keep talking, not entirely sure what I’m saying anymore. I’m too nervous to stop, afraid that he might yell at me, or beat me up. However when I look up he doesn't seem mad he seems… Understanding?

Our eyes meet and I can see his glare begin to fade away. Turning into a soft look of understanding. And then he says something absolutely insane and maybe he isn't as bad as Ochako says.

“You’re right,” he says to me, his usual rough, angry voice going softer, more monotone. It was unsettlingly pleasant. But I kinda liked it…is that bad? What is happening to my brain? “I have been stressed lately.” He’d just admitted… to being.. Stressed? Katsuki. Katsuki freaking Bakugou just admitted to being stressed? I feel like a therapist.

This is a monumental moment. An unbelievably crazy breakthrough. Where is my gold medal? Because I believe that I deserve one.

I still don’t believe what I just heard. I stare at him. “You what?” I ask. I feel like I’m gawking, staring at him like he's a pink striped refrigerator that shits glitter and eats rainbows.

“Oh, uh… You’re right. I’m stressed.” he repeated. He looked like he was about to say something else, and my whole body aches to know what it was, but I refrain myself, biting my bottom lip. I want to ask. But I don’t. I deserve yet another gold medal for that. I hold his eyes with mine, and I can tell he's searching mine. As if he's questioning if he should continue.

So I start, “Oh.. well.. When you’re playing.. It’s important to keep a level head. Hold on.. Let me um… show you…” I step towards him, sliding the ball from his hands, careful to avoid touching his hands like in those gay rom coms where they end up making out in 5 minutes after they touch their fingers. I wonder what it would be like if that did happen. That’d be weird, Or wonderful depending on how it feels. But Katsuki loo- stop it RIGHT THERE, thoughts. Nope, nope. Um… Nuh uh. Stop.

I walk over to the 3 point line, and I just know I’m blushing like an absolute idiot. “Now.. this isn’t going to be pretty… but block me” I say hesitantly. Katsuki just stares at me like I just started speaking an undiscovered language.

“What?” he asks, shaking his head and looking at me this time, rather than right through me.

For some reason, I have a death wish today. I feel a sudden confidence. If Katsuki really plays like what I just saw all the time, then maybe I can help him and beat him at the same time. Guess what, Kacchan? I’m gonna win.

“I’m gonna show you how to play your own sport, ka-cchan” I say, grinning at him. “What, do you not have the balls for it?” I prod, and he’s looking at me like I’m the pink striped fridge and not him.

He glares at me, and butterflies explode in my chest. I want to drown every last one of them, but they’re flying too high. Oh well. “Whatever, nerd. Just get ready for me to kick your ass” He says, and I can practically see his ego.

“Mhm.. okay” I say, watching as he gets into position to block me. “Ready?” I ask, and he nods. He’s blushing, I realize, and I grin even wider.

I quickly pretend to step forward tricking him into side stepping, before stepping backwards jumping up and shooting the basketball. As soon as it started, it ended. Ended with the basketball landing in the hoop, scoring a 3 pointer.

“The fuck was that” Katsuki snaps. God he's a sore loser. But oh do I love it. I love all of it.

“Oh.. um.. Sorry, I used to date someone who plays basketball, so I know a thing or 2 about the game…” I say. And I do not want to say anything anymore. I do not want to talk about him. And I don't want to tell Kacchan about him. That’d be a mess. I quickly shut my mouth, looking down at my feet.

I look up and our eyes meet. And we just stare at each other. I can't tell if he's glaring or not. I can’t tell if he’s flushed from his practice or from me. I quickly brush those away. Definitely practice. Why would he be blushing at me? Soon enough he breaks eye and walks over to the bench, that's only a few feet away. Wait. No, keep looking at me. Only me.

I watch as he picks up his water bottle, squirting some in his mouth. Damn. “You're staring nerd,” I know I'm staring. And yet I can't look away. I can't seem to take my eyes off of this masterpiece. He seems like he would be the perfect muse to an artist's painting. The perfect symbol of someone's goal. Or the reason for a music artist's piece. I still can't look away. What is wrong with me? Why am I looking, and why can't I control my actions? I can feel the blush heating up my face and neck.

“Oh.. my bad” I mutter, “Well… anyways.. About tutoring.. I.. when are we doing those?” I ask. Trying to swerve away from the awkwardness from before. Now he looks confused, did he seriously forget…?

“Um- any day besides Monday through Wednesday. I have practice then," Katsuki says. Luckily those are the same days for drama. And I don't have much more going on in my life. I may have no life… We don't talk about that. “Oh- same for me,” I say. Suddenly he looks mad, however it's not directed at me. More like he's thinking about someone, from what I can guess it's that teacher. I mean I would be mad if I had to get tutored for only one class, considering he's passing all his other classes with flying colors. Maybe it's just the teacher.

“Well, whatever. Thursdays are fine, I guess,” Katsuki says, seeming uninterested. “Okay, Kacchan,” I say, rubbing the back of my neck again. I can feel myself beginning to blush. “Well… um.. I should get goi-” I begin to say. Until the lights shut off, and I jumped, letting out an undignified noise that I hope was in my imagination.

I can't see Katsuki anymore. I can't see anything! What if I get lost and I can never find my way out? What if there's someone in the school trying to kill me and I can't see and get lost and die? I can't die!

“Are you… scared of the dark?” Katsuki asks, slightly confused. Was it that easy to tell? Oh, that's so embarrassing.. “Well… I’m sure you don’t know your way around. Come on, nerd,” Katsuki says. My brain isnt registering things fast enough, and I'm panicking because I can't see him. Then I feel a hand on my waist, and I squeak in surprise. My brain is short circuiting. I feel like I'm living in a romcom. Does this not sound like a romcom? Is it bad that I really, really like the feeling on his hand on my waist.

He shifts his hand to rest casually on my back. Okay this isn't so bad. I can focus on the ground and not the large and warm hand on my back. He slowly begins guiding me to what I assume is out of the gym and the building.

We walk down the halls a bit, before the light coming from the glass doors of the building illuminates the hallway. And I know I'm blushing like a maniac and I know he knows because he's staring down at me and smirking. That is not necessary, Kacchan. Jerk face.

We walk out of the building, and he pulls his hand away, and I wish he didn't. I miss the feeling of his hand on my back and I know I shouldn't be feeling like this but I do. I expect Katsuki to leave. To walk away and not turn back. But he doesn't. He just stares at me waiting for me to say something. I shiver slightly, watching as snow hits the ground, like soft glitter coating the ground. And him. It's covering Kacchan’s face, sticking in his hair and landing wherever it desires and he's beautiful. He looks beautiful. I glance up, noticing the darkness. Am I going to have to walk home alone?

My mother always warned me about walking home alone. It's starting to get dark out… I don't want to walk home alone. But the only other person here is Kacchan. Why does the world always play cruel tricks on me? World, this better be the funniest joke you've ever made, aside from my life in general. I'm about to do something idiotic. Again.

I turn toward Kacchan, and my nerves are devouring me from the inside out and the butterflies are attacking the inside of my stomach and my heart is trying to break my ribs. “C-could you walk home with me…? I don't usually go home this late alone and my mom’s always talking about the dangers at night so that's always freaked me out. And sorry, I just don't like walking home on my own in the dark. It scares me… And I think you could tell that in the gym I'm scared of the dark…" I start rambling because my nerves have a gun to my head. I'm a manipulative psycho. Using my own fears to make Kacchan walk home with me. Pathetic. If he actually liked you he would've offered, stup-

“Stop talking, nerd!!” He snaps, “Stop! Yes, I’ll fucking walk you home!”

Relief parades through my body, murdering every last bit of nervousness, every butterfly. Or trying to. The butterflies were still there, and my heart was still pounding away at my ribs. Why? I'm not walking home alone! I don't understand my own body anymore “O-okay. Thanks, Kacchan,” I say quickly.

The sky is dark, the stars are the only thing lighting up the sky. Snow falls down casting the road in a soft snow blanket. Trees are bare, and birds are gone, nothing to sing a soft tune in the mornings. Nothing for a predator to hunt. Flowers are gone, and so is the grass. Water is frozen to ice, like a thick plate of glass. The weather is down, turning most faces to a frown.

“Whatever, nerd” We start walking. Everything is normal, everything’s great. Unnervingly quiet, but other than that it was fine. Until I realize that Kacchan is following my exact route without me telling him where to go. How does he know where I live? And how does he know exactly how to get to my house…?

“Kacchan… how do you know the way to my house…?” I ask slightly scared and confused. Literally how does he know exactly where I live?

“Your house? This is the way to my… My house,” Katsuki says. We both stop in our tracks. I look at my house, to my right, and then up at katsuki, who’s looking at the house directly across the street from mine.

“What. The. Fuck,” Kacchan barks. .

Kacchans eyes meet mine. Red to green.

“We’re neighbors?!” we say in unison.

Chapter Text

Blaring. I woke up to my alarm clock fucking blaring, as if you couldn't make waking up for school any worse. Damn near the worst way to wake up, besides the old hag yelling in my damn ear.

I sit up from my bed, the covers pooling on my lap. And my tank top slightly disheveled. I look outside my window, soft snow now coating the ground and cars that park on the street. I see that fucking nerd's house, right across from mine. It's so much smaller than mine. I glance at the clock, the time reading 5:48am. Probably should start getting ready.

I throw on some sweatpants and a T-shirt. No practice means I ain't gotta do shit. Which means I can relax after school, maybe play in the snow. Or game with the idiots.

‘So I can tutor you on Thursday?’ the nerd's voice echoes from my memory, bouncing around my skull. Oh fuck this. Now I gotta deal with this shit after school. I don't even fucking need help with math, it's just that boring ass teacher. I guess it's okay since Izukus tutoring me. Still fucking hate him though. Him and that whole club. Or just the club. No. Definitely him and the whole club.

I slowly walk to the bathroom, blinking fast from the bright lights and wincing from the cold wood floors against my feet. I admire myself in the mirror. As usual. Damn, I look good as fuck. Quickly washing my face off, I take my anxiety meds and groan at the sound of my mother's voice.

“KATSUKI YOU BETTER BE GETTING READY!!” the hag says. Way to fucking loud, especially for it only being 6 in the fucking morning. “STOP YELLING SO FUCKING LOUD, HAG” I yell back, walking back to my room and shutting the door.

My phone buzzes, shaking me out of my thoughts.

“Who the hell is texting me this early…” I say, swiping my phone from the desk, accidentally ripping the charge out of the wall.

Shitty Hair

<<Yo, bakubro, whatcha doin after school. Denks and me gonna go to the arcade

>>I got tutoring lessons

<<WHAT?? Thought you were smart..🤨

>>I AM SMART YOU FUCKING CUNT🖕🖕

<<obviously not if you need tutoring lessons LOL

>>it's only because of that stupid fucking teacher, Istg she doesn't don't how to fucking teach a class. And it's only that class. Im passing all my other classes with flying colors stupid

<<didn't need to type a whole essay bro

<<anyway, who's tutoring you? 

>>Izuku fucking Midoriya

<<must be excited 😉😉

>>shut the hell up

>>I hate that shitty nerd

<<sureeee

>>whore

“Katsuki I'm gonna need you to drive to school today, I don't want you catching a cold. I do not want to have to deal with your sick ass," Mitsuki says. “Sure whatever," I mutter back, grabbing a protein bar and the mustang keys. I do not have the energy to fight back with her today, so she can win this time. But never ever ever fucking again.

Fuck it's cold holy shit. I throw my hoodie on, before eyeing a green blob of hair on the other side of the road. Izuku. He's playing in the snow. He's like an angel. Fuck. And he's building a snowman.. I wonder if I should- no. I will not be talking to him, I will be leaving right now.

“Whatcha doin nerd?” I ask, walking up and standing next to him. He jumps and whirls around. “Ah! Kacchan..! Oh my God, you scared me," Izuku says in a cute and whiney tone, and holy shit I'm going to explode in my fucking pants. "I'm making a snowman, isn't it cute?!” Izuku says. It is. However I will not be telling him that. “Nah, kinda ugly. Looks just like you," I say teasingly. “Rude…" Izuku says a soft pout on his face, and holy shit, kiss me already.

“Shouldn't you be leaving for school?” I ask. The bell rings for late people in about 45 minutes.. if he leaves now he won't be late. Not that I care or anything…

“Oh! I forgot. Thanks for reminding me Kacchan,” the nerd says, a soft smile on his face. Fuck me man.

“I can drive you if you want… I gotta Mustang I take to school sometimes,” I say. Why did I say that? I wont survive a whole ass car ride with him. I'm fucking stupid.

“A mustang?! That's so cool, I love mustangs. They're so pretty. Did you know the first day the mustangs were released they sold 22k and it could've been called the ford cougar? Oh, or that the first mustang was sold on accident…” and the nerd kept rambling.

“Shut up, nerd," I say slightly annoyed, “are you coming or not?"

“O-oh, yeah! Let me grab my stuff first!" he says, rushing off to grab his backpack. As he does that I walk over to the other side of the road, my shoes crunching in the ice, opening the garage and unlocking my mustang. Oh how I missed you my sweet baby. I climb in on the drivers side, hitting my shoes against the bottom of the door to get off any excess snow. I throw my bookbag into the passenger side floorboard.

I backed up carefully into Izuku's driveway, waiting for him to get into the car. I watch as the door to his house opens, his mom giving him a kiss on the cheek. They look similar, I think to myself. He opens the door to the car, giving me a smile before hitting the excess snow off his shoes before climbing into the car completely. I glance at his outfit, the yellow scarf he's wearing. It compliments his eyes.

I begin driving off, and I can tell he wants to say something based on the way he's fidgeting with his shirt. “Nerd,” I say. “Kacchan,” he responds. “What's on your mind?” I ask, and I don't know why I asked, I just wanted to. He seems like he needs to get something off his chest.

“Ah- nothing, just something stupid. How about we talk about tutoring? Where did you want to do that?” he asks, and now I'm uninterested in this conversation.

“My house, this afternoon, now tell me what is bothering you." I'm only saying things because he seems uncomfortable, and that will not be happening in my beautiful, amazing, expensive mustang.

“It really nothing, just something about my dad, hes been trying to get in touch with me even though I specifically told him I want no contact with him at all," he says, and fuck he looks like he'd about to cry. Please don't cry, how do you comfort a person who's about to cry? Fuck, I don't know.

So I do the only logical thing, and I place my fucking hand on his thigh, which is surprisingly, insanely muscular. And his body tenses. I would volunteer to have my skull crushed between these thighs and say thank you through my tears of fucking joy.

I squeeze his thigh softly. And I can feel his body slowly start to relax as I continue driving down the icy road, one hand on the wheel. Probably not the best idea, but I'll do it for Izuku.

“Well," I say, “do you know why he's trying to contact you…?" I'm thinking maybe Izuku's dad just wants to tell him something important, or he's just being a dick to my Izuku and asking for money or something.

“I don't know, and I really don't want to know," Izuku says. It's kind of a sad though, but honestly that's probably the best idea. Though I don't know the situation, Izuku seems really uncomfortable when he's talking about his dad.

I start sliding my hand up and down his thigh, and he seems to enjoy it. Good, enjoy this like I'm fucking enjoying this, because the feeling of this man's thigh, even covered in jeans, is doing shit to me that I didn't think possible. Fuck

He places a hand over my hand. Weird. “Thanks Kacchan," he says, squeezing my hand gently. I feel like he's squeezing my heart, and I love it. “Course nerd," I say. Fuck, why do I love this so much? I should hate this. But I want to do this, and I don't know if I feel comfortable doing this. Fuck this is so confusing. So I snatch my hand away and place it on the steering wheel, ignoring the confused look on Izuku's face.

Maybe that was a bad idea because now Izuku won't say jackshit. Fuck, what do I do? What should I say? This is so awkward and I don't know what to do. I'm Katsuki fucking Bakugo. Some small talk is like a grain of sand in my existence. insignificant, right? Like writing my name, I've been doing it for 18 years. Should be easy, right? So why is talking to this nerd so hard? Why did it have to be so complex? It’s like looking at the fucking sun. How the hell do you talk to a star?

I cruise into the school’s student parking section, already dreading the day ahead of me. I stop the car when I reach my favorite spot, cutting off the engine. I glance over at Izuku, who’s already stepping out of the car.

I step out of the car, grabbing my bookbag and looking up at Izuku, who's for some reason waiting for me. “You know, you didn't have to wait on me," I say looking across the car at him. He smirks, crouching down for a few seconds before coming back up and launching a snowball at my face. Holy shit. It hits me right in the fucking forehead. Why the hell does this man have such good aim? I wipe the snow off, glaring at him.

“Ha-!!! Ka-kacchan, holy crap that was funny..” Izuku giggles, his hands on his stomach as he laughs. Is it that funny? Really? (My first dream is to become a number one pro hero like all might. My second dream is for Kacchan to put his tongue in my mouth. And swirl it around.)

I quickly crouch down, picking up a large ball of snow and chucking at Izuku’s head who's still somehow fucking laughing, and it hits him directly in the face.

“Hah!! Paybacks a bitch, nerd," I say with a proud smirk on my face. Suddenly he starts chucking more snow at me. Now we are at fucking war. It’s on, nerd. I throw another at him.

Long story short, we were 25 minutes late to class. The teacher looks up over her shoulder from whatever the fuck she was writing on the white board, and her shit colored eyes bore into me. I swear, this bitch’s forehead is so big you could compare her to a beluga whale and not see a damn difference other than the fact that this hoe is 2 times the size of the whale.

She turns her gaze to Izuku, and I may just rip her shit balls out right now for the way she’s looking at him. “Why are you two boys late, eh?” She asks in her whiney ass voice.

“Oh.. sorry, Mrs. Pullium. There was traffic from the snow. It won’t happen again.” Izuku says. He turns red from embarrassment. He’s so fucking cute when he’s embarrassed.

“Mhm. Whatever… late on your second day here isn’t a good look for you, Izuku. Go to your seats” she says, and I swear her annoying fucking voice is like listening to fingernails on a chalkboard and the sound of your morning alarm mixed together.

I start walking to my seat, and I hear shitty hair and dunce face snickering from across the room and I completely ignore them, because fuck those guys, god damnit. Especially shitty hair.

“As I was saying, class, there will be an assembly after homeroom. If I hear any of you were misbehaving, it’s an automatic referral,” Mrs. Shit eyes says. Good thing I won’t be on the bleachers. I glance at Izuku, and see his eyes, wide and slightly horrified, and I remember he doesn’t really know anybody else. I snicker, and he glares at me.

“What’s so amusing, Mr. Bakugo? Considering that you have already interrupted the class, , I’d assume it’s absolutely hilarious. So why don’t you share?” Mrs. Pullium says in her chalky ass voice. I might just claw my ears off.

“Your fuck ass face” I say, and Izuku burst out laughing, burying his face in his arms on his desk. Kirishima and Kaminari quickly follow. Mrs. Pullium turns a bright shade of red, and I see her eyes tearing up. She’s fucking crying?? HAH! A sharp wave of satisfaction washes through me. Fucking pussy, actually I think she's a guy by the way she looks.

“Katsuki Bakugou! That is i-inappropriate ! G-go to the principal’s office r-right NOW!” It screeched. I think I’d rather be deaf right about now. Fuck this badussy ass beluga whale.

I stand up with a laugh, and walk out. Making my way to the principal’s office was actually pretty nice. I made sure to take my time, too. I finally walk into the office, and see principal Nezu sitting in his expensive ass chair. “Hello, Katsuki! Back so soon?” he says politely. I frown, and he clears his throat. “Why are you here?”

I tell him what happened, and he just stares at me. He stares for a long moment, before he coughs, covering a small laugh. “Oh my… that’s… oh. Well.. that is quite a reasonable thing to be laughing at..” principal Nezu says.

“Bitch ass teacher…" I mumble under my breath. “Well I guess I'll let you off with a warning, off you go,” principal Nezu says. I smirk and stand up from the office chair, making my way back to my class, which now has a substitute. Karma you ugly bitch.

Out of the 20 minutes left in class, Kirishima, Denki and I only have to sit through 5 of them, because we’re on the basketball team and in the assembly. Thank the fucking lord, because this bitch’s voice is even more annoying that Mrs. Pulliam’s.

Beep beep. Pardon the interruption, please dismiss all cheerleaders, wrestlers, girls and boys basketball teams to the gym. Please dismiss all cheerleaders, wrestlers, girls and boys basketball teams to the gym as well as managers. Thank you. says the announcements, but I’m already up and making my way to the door.

Denki and Kirishima follow me, and so do Izuku’s eyes. He’s watching me, and I love it. I sigh and spare him a glance over my shoulder, and we meet eyes. He blushes and looks away, embarrassed for staring, but all I can think is how cute he is when he’s embarrassed. He really is a fuckin’ nerd. We walk out, down the hallways, making our way to the gym. Most of the cheerleaders are already in their, in their skirts that are short as fuck, laughing and giggling and being fucking cheerleaders. I hate all the cheerleaders. Well, a few of them are alright, I guess. Like Hagakure, Jirou, and Momo. Jirou waves at Denki, who grins and waves back.

“Did you see that? I think she likes me” Denki says proudly, which makes me burst out laughing.

“You really think your dumbass self has a chance with her? Or any girl, for that matter?” I ask, and dunce face glares at me.

“No need to be rude,” he mutters. Kirishima stops walking, and it takes me a moment to realize he’s laughing his ass off.

All might walks over, grinning at us. The rest of the team shows up within the next 5 minutes, and so does Toga and Touya. “Alright, boys, go change into your uniforms, I want y’all back in less than 2 minutes! Go!” All might yells.

The team walks down to the locker room, everybody beginning to change. I quickly pull off my t-shirt, tossing it onto my bag. I’m about to pull off my gray sweatpants, when I hear the locker room door open.

“Hey, Kacchan, you left your phone on your de- Oh! Um..u-uh..I u-uh..E-erm… I’lltalktoyouaftertheassemblygoodbye,” Izuku’s bright red, stuttering over almost every word. He quickly turns and rushes out. The fuck was that?

“Are y’all like.. Dating? Are you fucking gay?” Shinsou says suddenly, “I mean I don't blame you, he’s cute as fuck."

I glare at him, and I really very much would like to rip every single hair off his disgusting, dirty, gay ass body. Fucking bitch ass cunt. But I just look at him. He’s ugly as hell.

“What the fuck did you just say..?” I bite out through gritted teeth. This motherfucking bitch ass fucking whore looking piece of shit is about to get ripped to fuck shreds. They'll be piecing his shrimp ass body back together for weeks.

“I said he was cu-” Shinsou starts, but gets cut off by Touya yelling from outside of the locker room. “Hey, you fuckin’ weirdos, lets go!” he yells. I quickly pull on my jersey not even bothering to take off my sweatpants. Genuinely don’t give a fuck. I follow after the rest of the team, glaring at the back of Shinsou’s head. I might fucking rip it off.

We walk out to the side of the gym that’s reserved for the basketball and wrestling teams, and sit down. I glare at my hands, not even bothering to look up at the students in the bleachers across the gym. I’m so fucking mad right now. He doesn’t have the right to call Izuku cute. Fucker. Nobody does. Nobody but me. What the fuck is wrong with me?

Chapter Text

First I get flashed by the most beautiful body I’ve ever seen in my entire life, and then I’m being ignored completely by said person. I look at him, mouth open in shock and I can’t seem to figure out how to close it. This is insane. I thought we were at least friends, but he won’t even look at me. I hate this feeling. I hate it. I want to get rid of it and never feel it again. It’s awful, being ignored.

Ochako’s on my left, and she’s talking to Tsuyu, and Mina’s on my right, and she’s grinning down at her boyfriend Kirishima and laughing as he makes a stupid face. I feel a pang of jealousy and I don’t know why because me and Kacchan obviously aren’t even friends. I wish we were and I wish I didn’t feel that way.

Mina looks at me, her mouth open to say something, when she notices my expression. I feel a wave of embarrassment at my own stupid disappointment.

“What’s wrong, Izuku?” She asks with a concerned expression, “Are you alright?”

I nod and nod, and I stop, thinking. I’m not, really. I’m mad. Really mad. So I shake my head. “Kacchan’s ignoring me” I mutter.

Mina just stares at me, as if I’d just started speaking a language that hasn’t been discovered yet. People tend to do that a lot with some things I say. The realization hits her, and she glances back across the gym at Bakugou. “Oh, that’s no fun.. He just looks mad.. But that’s normal. I mean, if you really want him to stop ignoring you, one thing that always gets under Katsuki’s skin is makin’ him jealous,” Mina says, "oh! What if you fake date someone?! That'll make him super jealous!!”

I look at her, trying to see if she’s just trying to make a joke out of my feelings. Maybe I’m too used to Kacchan. “..But… Why would Kacchan care if I’m dating someone? I’m not even sure he cares about me as a friend…” I say with a frown.

Mine blinks at me a few times. Is she tryna communicate using morse code? Show off her new lashes? Or maybe fly away with them? What is happening… “Are you dense or just stupid?" She acts blatantly.

“Excuse me?” I ask. Did she really just ask me that? Rude.

“Izuku, hunay, Katsuki obviously has a big ass crush on you. He wouldn’t even let Cami ride in his mustang. You’re special,” she says. What? Who is Cami?

“Uh.. who’s Cami?” I ask. Did she date Kacchan? Did he like her better than me? Was she nicer? Prettier? Was she in drama club? Was she a better actress? What the hell? Oops. Heck.

Mina blinks more. “Oh, you don’t know about Cami? Oops. I’ll let Katsuki tell you about her bitch ass...” she looks away nervously, rubbing her palms on her pants. Mina’s skin was always gorgeous, and glowing, the dark complexion of it complimenting her eyes. How did Kirishima pull her?? “Aaanyways.. You should fake date someone. I need some drama in my life. You and Katsuki are a perfect source of it, too. On my so,” Mina grins.

Ochako looks over at Mina, and then me. “You want to fake date someone to make Katsuki jealous? That sounds interesting! I’ll help,” Ochako says. Did she just say she’ll help? What is happening? Girls are so confusing. Fun to talk to, but confusing.

“Oh this is beautiful. Splendid. Ochako and Izuku fake dating so that Izuku can make Katsuki jealous,” Mina giggles.

“I want to make Toga jealous. She’s been hanging out with that Shinsou guy a lot and it’s really frustrating. I think she likes him, but I don't understand why I feel jealous,” Ochako says, and Mina gasps.

“More drama? Oh, I love this!” Mina presses her hand to her mouth and laughs. “This is just.. mwah!! I can’t wait to tell Kirishima!”

“What?! No! You can't tell Kirishima he might spoil it for Kacchan!" I shout, and I realize my mistake, and how loud I was, quickly clamping my hand over my mouth. That may have been a little bit too loud. Or way too loud. Some people turn around to look at me, giving me weird looks. I quickly cover my face, feeling the heat of embarrassment creep up my neck, coloring my cheeks.

“Ugh!! Fine I won't…” Mina mutters. He crosses her arms across her chest and pouts, jutting out her bottom lip dramatically, and I roll my eyes.

“Thank you” I say.

“Alright, students of UA highschool! Our cheerleaders are going to start us off with several cheers!”

The cheerleaders start the cheers, a mix of stomps and shouts continue. Instead of listening, like I should be, I tune everything out, and instead focus on the fact that Katsuki is absolutely glaring at Shinso, who looks like he’s smirking but from this far away I can't tell.

“Students!! May I get your attention please? We will begin introducing wrestlers after a quick game, so can Katsuki Bakugou please come up and choose a student to do a 1v1 basketball game against one of the members on your team?” principal Nezu announces.

Katsuki stands up taking the mic from Nezu with a smirk on his face. Uh oh. Oh, boy. Oh my gosh, I’m going to literally swan dive off the roof of a building. Katsuki looks directly at me and says into the mic.

“I choose Izuku Midoriya against Shinsou” I feel all the blood drain from my face, and Mina laughs and pushes me up to my feet, and I feel myself walking down to the gym floor but I don’t remember telling my legs to do that. I walk up to Kacchan with a glare on my face

“Why would you choose me? What in the world is wrong with you, Kacchan!? I really don't want to embarrass him…” I whisper angrily, and for some reason Katsuki starts laughing.

“Izuku, baby. I want you to embarrass the fuck out of Shinso’s shrimpy ass,” Kacchan says. Um.. okay.. I feel my cheeks flush when he says that. There is something wrong with the man standing in front of me. Oh well. I guess I will. Sorry in advance, Shinsou.

Suddenly, Shinso walks up from behind me. “Don't worry, Babes.. No need for you to worry. I’ll go easy on you.” Ew what the heck? A wave of disgust washes over me, and I look up at Kacchan, who looks about ready to beat the absolute crap out of Shinsou. Knowing Kacchan, there is probably a whole symphony of cuss words going through that head of his, ready to be put on the front lines and sent off to war.

“No need…" I say biting, my tongue from saying anything else. Shinsou frowns down at me, and I smile smugly at him, “I want you to try as hard as you can, because you’re gonna need any of the pathetic skills you have to even compare to me. Just saying” I say politely, and Shinsou gapes at me, and so does Kacchan, even though Kacchan’s expression is almost entirely different. Maybe he’s rubbing off on me, because did I seriously just say that?

“Clock it," Toga says from the bleachers. I grin at her, and walk over to All Might, taking the basketball from him. I get into a ready position, checking Shinsou twice, before All Might blew the whistle. Shinsou swipes the ball, turning to dodge me. He goes to shoot a 3 pointer, but I block him, snagging the ball, and dribbling over to the other side of the court and jumping up, dunking the ball into the net. When my feet hit the floor, the sound echoes across the gym. It’s dead silent.

Everything is silent. Suddenly Kacchan bursts out laughing, doubling over and clutching his stomach. The whole gym roars with cheers, the bleachers shaking, hy head and my chest and my whole body shaking with it. It’s so loud. I miss the silence. I miss the silence a lot.

Shinsou just stares at me, along with the rest of the team and all the basketball coaches, and wrestling coaches, and teachers and student body. I turn red from embarrassment. Kacchan walks up to me, grinning.

“Earlier, I was really fuckin’ mad, but that just made my day, nerd,” Katsuki says ruffling my hair with his hand. "You still have tutoring lessons this afternoon,” I say back.

“Could you let me enjoy my happiness for a moment…” Katsuki groans. I smile up at him, a soft laugh escaping me. “Never” I say, and he rolls his eyes. My heart flutters for no reason whatsoever, and I want to strangle it, and beat it up until it doesn’t do that anymore.

“You should… uh… sit with me…" Kacchan says.

I blink a few times, staring at him. What did he say? Excuse me? Sit with him? Like.. with his team? “Uh.. like.. With your team..?” I ask, and he nods. I swallow, and shrug.

“No, you dumb fuck, we’re gonna sit and gossip with the cheerleaders on the moon. Yes, with me and my team, on the bleachers.” Kacchan snaps, and I flinch. Rude. Kacchan sees my expression, and rubs the back of his neck. “Er.. well.. I mean.. Sorry. You’re not that fucking dumb, Izuku.” he says, and I smile. “Thanks, Kacchan. I appreciate it”
“Well that was one heck of a display, Izuku!” the coach of the basketball team says, walking up and smacking me on the back. I was not expecting that. I yelp, whirling around. I look up at him, and quickly flush with embarrassment again. “Have you ever thought about joining the basketball team?” he asks.

I shake my head quickly, “no, no, no, no, no, no, no, nooo thank you. I don’t do basketball.” I see it all over again. Monoma and that stupid gym and stupid games, and stupid plays, stupid memories. All those horrible dreams that I wish would become nightmares. Kacchan looks at me, and I feel judged. I feel insecure, I feel like he’s tearing away at my expression, trying to dissolve my smile to see what’s underneath, the ‘real me’.The ‘real me’ doesn’t feel real at all. Just a persona of what I used to be. Who I was when I was with him, wasn’t real, it never was. I see that now, and I realize how much I was lying to myself. I hate lies. And I hate him..

“Well.. it’s his decision whether he wants to join or not, and he just said no,” Kacchan says. He reaches out, grabbing me by the wrist and pulling me over to the rest of his basketball team, and sitting me down next to him. I flush in embarrassment when they all look at me and him in confusion. I turn even more red when Shinsou glares at me, sitting on the other side of Kacchan. I turn to Shinsou and stick my tongue out, flicking off Shinsou. I smile warmly at Kacchan who's now looking at me in shock and amusement.

Kacchan then does something that might just make me explode. Spontaneously combust. Why is his hand on my thigh again? I think I like it a little too much. Now I feel all giddy inside, like my insides are buzzing, humming with anxiety and desire. I stare up at him, my cheeks flushing impossibly more red, but I’m only partially embarrassed this time. What is this idiot doing to me? Why can’t I breathe?

“U-um..by the way me and Ochako are dating…!" I blurt. Why did I say that? Both Kacchan and Toga are staring at me and oh my God what did I just do? I swallow thickly, reaching my hand up and rubbing the back of my neck.

“What…" Kacchan says through gritted teeth. Oh. He looks mad. But more importantly, jealous. Good. Be jealous Kacchan, I want you to think about the fact that now I'm taken, and you can't do anything about it.

Thank you lord, for Mina Ashido. I give him a soft smile. “Mhm, she asked me out in the hallway while we were heading to the assembly," I say. Where did all of this confidence come from? Was it the look on his face? Or maybe it was the spirit of Mina. “Aren’t you so excited for me? We are going on a date in a few days! You should totally find someone to go with you, we could have a double date!!” I say. Actually no, don't find someone. I want you all to myself, and me only. Hate the fact that you can't date me, please fall in love with me. Please.

Kacchan just stares at me like I’ve told him that I’m actually an alien and I’ve flown in from some planet 12 galaxies over, and I eat brains, poop live dogs, and the only word in my vocabulary is ‘yeehaw!’

“Maybe…" Katsuki says suddenly standing up from the bleacher. “I'm going to the fucking bathroom," Katsuki says. I watch as he walks away, and an unsettling doom roots itself in the pit of my stomach, weighing me down. Move. I can’t breathe. I can’t feel anything, I’m completely numb. I can’t look away from him. I messed up. I want to take it back. God.

“So you and Ochako are dating? Does that mean I can date Katsuki?"

Chapter Text

I slam my fist into the fucking stall door. The door makes a screeching sound, and flies off the hinges, slamming into the wall behind it. My knuckles sting. I look and see blood trickling down my fist and falling to the floor. Falling. Falling like I did for that stupid nerd. Why the hell do I make such bad decisions? Why can't I ever pick the right person? Am I just incapable of loving someone? Of being loved back? Why can’t people reciprocate the feelings I feel for them? Why do these things have to be so damn hard? Why does it feel like I’m being ripped apart like a piece of paper? 

       I walk over to the sinks. I stare at my stupid, pathetic ass reflection for a long moment. I let out a frustrated yell, slamming my fist I into the glass, shattering the mirror. Apparently it's supposed to give you bad luck. I think luck is just a fucking myth. If I had luck then maybe I wouldn’t have to try so fucking hard for every little thing I do or get scrutinized for every tiny mistake I make. I could have been loved back. Even my own mother can't love me. Why the hell did I expect someone like him to love me? I don’t even know if he could ever like me. 

       The door of the bathroom flies open, and a gorgeous green haired specimen walks in, his eyes wide. Those same eyes flick from the broken stall door, to the shattered mirror, to my hand. His mouth falls open, and I feel like an idiot. I feel like if I exploded right here I wouldn’t mind. 

       “K-kacchan, oh my gosh! What happened.. Are you okay?” he gasps, rushing towards me. He grabs my hand, pushing me back against the wall with a ferocity I wasn't expecting. He's inspecting my hand and I can't help but wonder if maybe if the world weren't so cruel and if the world had shown mercy then maybe I could have him all to myself. I guess I'm stuck wondering.

       He turns on the sink and rinses my hand, I flinch as my whole arm throbs. Maybe that wasn't the best idea. “I'm fine, nerd!” I try pulling away when in all reality that's the opposite of what I want. He ignores my protest and I'm so glad he does. He tugs my hand into the running water. Why is he so strong? He looks pretty scrawny from a distance. 

       “I'm gonna take you to the nurse, okay?" Izuku says, grabbing a paper towel and applying pressure to my knuckles. His eyebrows are pinched together with worry and concern, and I can’t help but think that he’s cute. So fucking cute, but now I feel guilty because apparently him and fucking pink cheeks are a thing..? Dumb bitch. 

       “Is that fine Kacchan?" Izuku asks again. “Yeah whatever…" I mumble rolling my eyes. And I can feel him start to pull my hand as he walks. 

       I try to slide my fingers in between his, ignoring the searing pain that came from my hand. Why did I decide to punch a damn mirror? He pulls his hand away from mine, and it takes me a minute to realize that his hand isn’t in mine anymore. What the fuck? He fucking pulled away. What. The. Fuck..? 

       I scoff, “I’ll go by myself weirdo, go hang out with your fucking girlfriend," I say through gritted teeth. I’m tired of feeling like this. I’m tired of feeling conflicted and confused when he obviously doesn’t want me. I’m not entirely sure why I’d think that to begin with. Such a fucking delusional fuck. 

       “What? No it's fi-” Izuku begins to talk but I quickly cut him off. “I said I'll fucking walk myself, idiot," I spat out.

       “I can walk with you Katsuki!!” The most annoying ass voice I’ve ever heard, aside from pink cheeks, of course, screeches out from behind Izuku. Hell no. I’m sick and tired of this bitch tryna get my attention. The hoe has had a crush on me since 6th grade. 

       I turn around, and guess who I see? Fuckin’ Kendo. I roll my eyes, taking a long look at her. She's.. pretty..? Not on an Izuku level, no where fucking near the nerd. But…. I mean, I'd sure as hell date her to get back at Izuku. HAH. Get the get back. 

       “T’s fine.. you walk with me, I guess” I say, barely managing to hold back an eye roll when I practically hear her fucking squeal. She runs up to me and I almost cringe away, and she wraps her arms around my uninjured one, and damn near drags me away from the love of my life. 

        I glance at Izuku, who looks at me and waves. But he looks different. Is that jealousy? Fuckin’ better be. “OMG Katsuki so like here's the drama from the cheerleaders, so like everyone thought you and whatever that ugo from earlier with the green hair were dating, and I was like no way yall are dating because you are way too good for him. Anyway when I heard that he and Ochako were dating I was so glad because I can have you all to myself-” and at that point, I’m tuning her out because all she’s spitting out right now is lies, and I actually couldn't give a singular fuck.

       I get to the nurse’s office, and thank the Lord. The nurse tells Kendo to leave. Kendo pouts and turns towards the door, blowing me a kiss before leaving and closing the door, fucking disgusting.

       The nurse cleans my hand with peroxide, which hurts like hell, then wraps it with a bandage before shooing me out of her office and back to class like I’m some sort of fucking dog. 

       I'm left walking down the hallway in my own thoughts, in my own prison of constantly thinking about Izuku. My mind is reeling, but it keeps coming back around to the fact that he looked jealous earlier. I smile to myself. Maybe. Just maybe. Maybe I’ll get lucky. Maybe he does like me and he’s messing with me. Maybe I’m a fucking delusional loser. Now, in this unfortunate state of mind, for some reason I won’t ever be able to understand. All I can think about is him on his knees, eyes watering and his cheeks pink as he wraps his lips around my dick as he works his way up, inch by inch and- Fuck. Stop. 

       I make my way to the senior’s hall and open my locker. No way in hell am I staying in this God awful school any longer. “Kacchan? What are you doing?” Izuku’s confused voice asks from behind me. Why the fuck is he always here when I want him to but don’t need him to be? I swear the devil can ride 360s on my motherfucking tip.  

       “I'm going home, I don't feel good,” I say quickly. It comes out more harsh than I wanted it to. "oh,” Izuku says, and I want to beat the shit out of myself for the way Izuku’s response sounds. "So we are going to have to reschedule tutoring?” 

       “Nah, I can drive you to my house for that?” I say.

       "No way!!” Izuku says as if I just said the most absurd thing he’s ever heard in his life. “I can't skip class, my mom will kill me!” As he says this I roll my eyes. Such a pussy. Or a mama's boy, but what's the difference?

       “Well, you can stay at my house till you can go home to make it seem like you stayed for the rest of the school day. Unless you want to walk to my house at the end of the day…" I say, even though I already know his answer. He’s predictable. He also hates walking home by himself. 

       “Fine…" Izuku mutters defiantly, a pout on his face. Fuckin’ called it.  

       I smirk, opening my locker and shoving my stuff in it. I glance at Izuku, who's staring at me. “You’re staring,” I say. “S-sorry,” Izuku mumbles quickly, putting his stuff in his locker and turning back to me. His cheeks are slightly red. Whys he gotta be so fucking cute?! I groan, grabbing my gym bag and walking beside Izuku towards the exit of the school.

       I click the button on the key of my mustang. The car unlocks and I look at Izuku, who's looking between me and the car, his eyes darting back and forth. “So… are you gonna get in the car…?" I ask, cocking a brow as I look between his beautiful face and my gorgeous car, and I can’t tell which one is prettier. 

       “O-oh, yeah! Sorry," Izuku says, going over to the passenger side and opening the door. Fumbling with his bag before stuffing it into the floor of the passenger seat and clamoring into the seat. I click my tongue and stride over to the driver's side, opening the car door and sliding in. I look over at Izuku, and I swear he’s blushing. I mess with the AC, hiding the lower half of my face with my arm as I smirk to myself, feeling very heavily accomplished. 

       I back up out of the parking spot, starting to drive out of the student parking lot. I drive down the road, and I feel Izuku’s eyes on me. All over me. He’s fucking staring like he’s fucking eating me with his eyes, and if staring didn’t bother me as much as it does, then I could argue that it turns me on. Not that anybody will ever know that, or would need to know that. 

       I stop at a stop light, the red flashing of brake lights of the car in front of us shines onto Izuku's face, illuminating his already glowing features. He winces, covering his eyes with his hand, turning his head away from the light, which causes him to notice me staring. I cough, quickly looking away, back towards the road. I pull out my phone, responding to some shit Kirishima sent me. The light turns green, and I start driving again. “K-Kacchan, you shouldn't be texting and driving, Oh my goodness, we’re going to die!” Izuku screeches dramatically, covering his face with his hands and sinking down into the seat.

       “What..? You’re so fucking extra, nerd. Holy shit," I groan, rolling my eyes. I respond to the video Shitty hair sent with a middle finger emoji. Basically throwing my phone into one of the cup holders. Then some fucking extra has the audacity to honk at me. Who the actual fuck does this fucking cunt think she is? Hoe you are some broke back bitch ass motherfucker who can only afford to drive a fucking Honda, stupid ass bitch probably can't keep a fucking man in her dull ass life. 

       “Oh my gosh, Kacchan, what?” Izuku gasps. Did I say that out loud? Shit, Izuku’s habits are fucking wearing off on me. 

       “Not my problem the bitch is driving to fucking Arby's cause she can't afford to eat somewhere else. Only reason she honked at me was because she's a fattie who needs to eat every 2 seconds," I spit. 

       “Kacchan!! That's so mean… Plus Arby’s is good…” Izuku mumbles. 

       “No it's not, you just don't eat real fucking food, you fucking nerd," I say. Izuku pouts, crossing his arms across his chest. I pull into our neighborhood, slowing down so I don’t get fucking pulled over because there are always fucking fatass cops sitting here, eating their nasty ass Firehouse and Dunkin’ coffee, shooting radar. Bitches. I pull into my garage, and turn off the key, stepping out of my car. 

       “Wow, this is a big garage, Kacchan” Izuku says when he steps out, his voice echoing around the garage. I remember he’s never been into my house before, and smirk (THAT DAMN SMIRK). I walk over to the door, opening it, waiting for him to step inside. “I think it’s pretty average,” I say with a shrug. He frowns at me, stepping into my house. His eyes go wide, and he spins in a circle as he looks around like he’s in some fucking k-drama and he’s the main character. Well he definitely looks the part. 

       “Woah!! Kacchan, your house is so coolll!!” Izuku says, practically drooling over every detail. 

       “Just wait till you see my room, nerd," I say and I think I see his eyes twinkle. Just maybe. 

       “Can we?!” Izuku says his mouth agape. His cheeks are slightly pink and I glance away. He’s too much. I think he’s genuinely going to kill me. I’m so fucking done for. Greater power, or god, or Jesus, or whatever, if you’re there, I have a question. Why did it have to be Ochako? Why not me? Avoiding eye contact, I hang my bag on the hanger beside the door. 

       “If you want,” I say, and this time I watch his face flush red. I snicker and slide my shoes off, glancing at Izuku before making my way to the staircase. Izuku continues staring and looking around, following close behind me. I swear, he looks like a fat ass obese kid in a candy store. 

       I open the door to my room and I can practically feel Izuku's excitement. He’s radiating with it, and it’s a little obnoxious, considering it’s just my room. I mean yeah, a big ass room, but still. “Woah… Kacchan this is so cool!!” Izuku says practically yelling in my ear, and he’s hopping up and down. I swear his legs are turning red and he’s about to launch off into outer space. “Is that a drum set?!” What, is he a fucking rocket ship? 

       Izuku is always bright and obnoxious, sure, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen him glow quite like this. Never physically glowing, but somehow always making everything around him seem brighter and more vibrant. Maybe it’s in his expression, or maybe even the way he moves effortlessly. Maybe. But I think it’s his eyes. His eyes, the ones I could look into and suddenly be lost in, forever imprisoned and left to drown in their emerald depths. Even when I think I can’t go any deeper, I always manage.

Haha, that’s what she said. Izuku is jumping up and down around my drum set, and suddenly he’s by the bookshelf, then my closet, the pool table, the couch, and over by my bed, inspecting the things on my nightstand, looking at books on the shelves, pictures, and the fish tank. Nosy. 

“Anyways.. Well.. I guess we should start studying.” He says, and flops down on my couch like he owns the place. He whips out his books from his book bag, a few note journals falling out on the floor. Why were there 5? How many notes does he take? I walk over, picking them up for him. He flushes, snatching them out of my hand. What the hell? This guy is so fucking weirdo I swear. 

       “Oi, what the hell? Don't gotta be so fucking secretive. Fuckin’ weirdo,” I say. Izuku mumbles some half ass apology and shoves the notebooks into his bag. 

       “Anyway… So it was math right?" Izuku says. He grabs a pen from the side pocket of his bright yellow ass bag and opens a notebook. He's so weird, but I love it and I can't explain it. I realize he's said something but all I saw was his lips moving. I wonder what it'd feel like with those same, gorgeous lips wrapped around my cock. Kissing and licking up the side. Stroking his hand against my dick faster. Harder. Until- 

      “Kacchan?" Izuku says, looking at me with concern, breaking me out of my trance. 

       “What..?" I mutter. Fuck, I’m an idiot.

       “For tutoring..? Kacchan, did you seriously already forget?” Izuku says, and this time he sounds actually annoyed. Rude ass. How the hell did he make me forget about tutoring? Fuck you. No actually fuck you and your cute ass dimples and freckles. Why is it that whenever I'm with Izuku it seems like the world stops. Like for some reason all of my problems, anxiety, and hate seem to flutter off into the abyss. And I hate it. He's just like her. And it's so fucking unsettling, it's so scary? Izuku seems better, he looks better, he's smarter. But it's still so similar, so fucking annoying. But the ass. Damn.

       “Kacchan… Are you okay?" Izuku says. When did he get so close? Izuku lays a hand over my chest, over my heart. A heart that's about to fucking explode. 

       “I-im fine..! And don't touch me," I divulge, smacking away his hand. He winces, fuck, and snatches away his hand. 

       “Meanie,” Izuku pouts. What the hell? Why does he do this to me? What is it going to take for me to hate this nerd? Make me hate him!! Please. I really don't want to love him. “Shut up…" I practically yell. Why is my luck this fucking bad?

       I walk over to the couch and sit down, spreading my legs and resting one of my arms on the arm of the couch. Izuku follows me, sitting next to me and pulling the notebook back into his lap. 

       And I feel it. The tiny, tingly, annoying, pulsating sensation in between my legs. Fuck. Extra fuck. Shit. This annoying fucking wet dream of a person has caused something. Something that I would love to stick inside him and- no. Stop. 

       “Gotta go shit really quick," I spit out. I stand up and walk as fast but nonchalantly to the bathroom as I can and shut the door. Slam it at that actually. 

       “Fuck…" I groan quietly. The tent in my pants is growing. Fuck. I lean against the door pulling down my sweatpants and boxers down just enough. Just enough to pull out my dick. I know I'm big. In fact everything about me is big. My ego, my strong suits, me, and my di… Dignity? Yeah. Definitely. 

       I pull out my cock and hiss as the cold air hits. I wrap my fingers around my dick and slowly start stroking up and down. Electric currents shoot down my spine, and I shiver. I press my eyes shut and just think. Think about him, his ass, his hands, wrapped around me, stroking up and down. I think about his gorgeous green eyes. I remember my favorite color, and I wonder why I ever told myself to hate it. The color green. His green eyes. His eyes looking into mine. Tears pricking them, coating them in a shining layer and threatening to topple out, all over his beautiful  cheeks and freckles. I imagine him getting on his knees and looking up at me. I imagine him, his muscular ass thighs bulging out and fuck I wouldn't mind them being around my face. He opens his mouth, spit coating his lips as he sticks out his tongue. I push my thumb against the head of my erection and imagine it’s his tongue. I imagine it’s his lips wrapping around me and not my hand, and his tongue swirling around my tip and not my thumb. I imagine it’s his head bobbing back and forth to take me deeper until I feel myself start to climb. Climbing a tall ass ladder, until I slip and fall, tumbling all the way down. I feel like a fucking dam ready to burst. I groan as the orgasm crashes into me slamming into me in waves. holy fucking shit. My hand gets coated in white sticky cum. Fuck. 

       “Fuck…!” I groan, way too fucking loud. The weight of what I've just done comes crashing down on me like a tsunami hitting my entire body, shoving me into the bottomless ocean of thoughts of my fucked up actions. I cannot believe I just did that. I just fucking came to the thought of the person I hate! The person I want to hate, but I fucking can’t. Why can’t I? Fuck! I lift my hand and feel the sticking sensation of cum on my hand. 

       “Kacchan..? Are you okay?" Izuku calls from behind the door.

       “fuck. Yeah I'm fine, nerd, just uh… Kirishima sent me something…!" I say, quickly shoving my dick back in my pants and washing my hands free from the earlier activities. 

       I open the door and step out of the bathroom, walking back to the couch and sitting beside Izuku. How the hell are you supposed to talk to the guy you just got off to in the bathroom while he was sitting basically right outside the door? 

       “Kacchan… you didn't flush the toilet. Are you sure you had to use the bathroom?” Izuku says skeptically. How the fuck did forget to pretend flush the toilet? “Um… Kirishma had to tell me something and he didn't want anyone else to hear…yeah,” I mutter hoping it sounds convincing. It probably doesn’t.

       “Oh…okay…” Izuku says, and his eyes say enough. Actually they’re saying entirely too much. Why did I have to do that? I don’t want to lie to him, but I’m sure as fuck not telling him I just got off to imagination-Izuku sucking my dick. Fuck. “I mean you don't have to lie…” Izuku continues. 

       “So are we going to start tutoring me or are you just going to sit there and look pretty?” I ask nonchalantly. As the words fall out of my mouth, Izuku turns bright fucking red, covering his face with his hands. 

       “Kacchan! You can't just say that!!" Izuku whines, his voice high and squeaky. "Why the hell not? Freedom of speech I-zu-ku,” I say, my voice rasping out. I lean towards him, sitting forwards slightly and hovering over his face. I can basically feel the heat radiating off his face. 

       “K-kacchan…” Izuku says his voice barely above a whisper. 

       “Hmm~?” I him, looking straight into Izukus eyes. I think my heart explodes as I watch a bucket of red paint get spilled all over Izuku. I suck ass at flirting. I always manage to fuck it up. So I stopped. I never flirt. When did I get so bold? Why did I get this bold? Well, guess I can't stop now. I'm not a fucking quitter.

       I lean closer towards Izuku, battling the grin that threatens to crack my indifference when I see the look on his face. His gorgeous fucking face.“Kacchan…" Izuku basically whimpers. I smirk and reach for the pencil that's sitting beside his thigh. My hand lands on his thigh and slides across it until I reach the pencil. I can practically feel Izuku vibrating. 

       “Sorry~ needed this pencil, nerd,” I prattle. My eyes flit down to his lips before looking back up at his eyes. I feel Izuku staring at me, watching me. His lips quiver and he shifts slightly on the couch. There’s no fucking way this nerd likes Ochako. It’s literally impossible. Why the fuck did he choose her over me? What does her ass have on me? A pussy? Bitch please.

       “Mmh…" I groan, pulling away and leaning my back against the couch."you're not very good at tutoring, ‘zuku,” I state, twirling the pencil in my hand. 

“Hey, that’s not true! You haven’t even given me a chance to start yet!” he protests. 

       “I haven't given you a chance because you haven't tried, idiot," I bark back. Izuku makes a soft whining noise, hitting the back of his hand against my leg. 

       He whips out a big ass math book, and opens it. He glares at me, and pulls out another pencil. He’s so fucking cute when he’s mad. Especially when he’s mad at me. “Anyways, what are you struggling with?” He asks. His lips look fucking perfect. I don’t even think he’s real. I just want to grab him, and-

He slams the book shut. “Kacchan, would you fucking listen to me?! I’m trying to help your stupid butt, and you won’t even pay attention! It’s like talking to a big, fat, stupid, stubborn ASS WALL” he snaps, and I think I’ve seen a ghost. I think Izuku was abducted by aliens while I was cumming to the thought of him, because who is this gorgeous green eyed being who’s cussing at,  me? Izuku doesn’t cuss. Izuku doesn’t know those words. What?

       “Damn… Izuku, you should cuss more," I say. I want to add that I thought that was the most attractive thing that’s ever come out of his mouth. I want to add that he looks hot when he’s mad. I really fucking want to. But I’m not that selfish. If he likes Ochako, there’s nothing I can do. Nothing at all. Unless- mission: steal Ochako’s man? 

       “That's what you took from me yelling! Kacchan! I can't help you if you don't tell me what you need help with,” Izuku groans, a cute ass pout on his face.

        "I need help with pi, that stupid ass teacher doesn't know how to fucking teach…” I mutter. It’s humiliating to think that I need help with this shit. I mean I should be able to beat this nerd at anything. It’s like a big ass bitch slap to the face. I mean, who the fuck needs pi? I sure as hell don’t. But no, I’m going to have to learn it. So I’ll learn the shit out of it, and pass her stupid class, and then never use it again, just to prove to that stupid teacher I don’t need it. Get humbled, bitch.

       “Kacchan… Pi is easy. All you gotta learn for the unit is how to use pi in the actual world like predicting the weather, or using Google maps on your phone. Also in building architecture and stuff like that,” Izuku rambles. 

       “Yeah yeah, quit nerding out weirdo,” I say. Izuku looks at me and rolls his eyes. Sassy much? He keeps talking about pi, and if it weren't coming from his beautiful lips I would say this is boring. I would, but considering this information is coming from Izuku, and he's using that beautiful mouth of his to do what it does best. Talk. And explain things. He makes it make so much more fucking sense and I'm starting think that i’m just stupid.

       “Do you understand now?" Izuku asks, closing the math book that was in his lap. “Mhm," I mutter, twiddling a pencil with my fingers. 

       “It's only 3:15, and I told my mom I'd be back around 4 because of tutoring…” Izuku says, shoving the book back into his bag. 

       “Ah, so you got about 45 minutes to burn. Watcha wanna do?” I ask, throwing a pencil at his head. The pencil hits his forehead and he whines, his finger going to rub the spot it hit.  I start snickering and Izuku throws a glare at me. Or what he at least thought was a glare. 

       “Well… You could help me practice lines? Or if you don't want to do that you can show me around your room…? Or something like that…" Izuku mutters, twiddling with his thumbs and looking down, fuck whys he gotta act so fuckin’ cute. Like bitch I just got off to the thought of you once, you don't gotta make it twice.

       “Meh, I'll help you practice your lines another day, I'll just show you around my room I guess," I say, sitting up from the couch. Izuku nods, his green hair flopping into his eyes. He stands up, and grins, shoving his hair out of his eyes as he looks around. He walks over to my 75” TV, staring at it wide eyed. “What do your parents do for work again?” He asks. I shrug casually, “They both work in the fashion industry. Make clothes and stuff. They sometimes make music.” I nod over at my drum set, and he gasps. 

       “Kacchan, you can play the drums?! Oh my goodness, is that an electric guitar? Oh my gosh Kacchan are those bongos?” He runs over to them and starts touching them, running his hands along the top of them. Lowkey wish they were me- I mean what? 

       “Oi! Don't fucking touch them,” I groan, guess I gotta fucking wipe them down now. Izuku mutters a short apology and runs over to the guitar and looks at it like a toddler  that wants ice cream but it’s bitch ass mom said no. Damn, am I a bitch ass mom? Kinda reminds me of my mom, fuck you hag. 

       My phone buzzes, and I pull it out to look at it. Fucking shitty hair sending me another Tokitok. I roll my eyes, and unlock my phone. My calendar pops up. I’m about to X it out, when I catch one of my labels, which is next Thursday.  Fuck, I forgot about that.

       “Ey, nerd, I’m going to have to miss tutoring next Thursday” I say, clicking on the Tokitok Kirishima sent me. It a weird ass fucking minion, just standing there, and the caption says ‘imma touch you’. What the fuck. Why am I friends with this dude?

   Izuku looks up from my guitar, staring at me, his gorgeous green eyes confused. “What? Why?” he asks with a frown. I don’t want to fucking tell him this. 

       “I promised my friend I'd help her with her rugby drills” I say quickly. Yeah, he’ll believe that. 

       He looks away as if avoiding eye contact and mutters something incoherent, a slight pout on his face. “I didn't… know you played rugby, nor did i know you knew someone… um.. who..?" 

       “Eh, you don't know her. She's a pro, she just needs an additional person,” I say.

       “Oh, she's a pro? I might know her? What's her name?” Izuku questions.

       “Mirko,” I say.

       “Excuse me? You know Mirko??!” He squeaks, his bright green eyes wide in astonishment. I relish in the way he looks at me, the way the light catches his eyes and sucks me in.

       “Yeah. What, y’ not know anyone famous, yah extra?” I mock, looking at him. He frowns, his expression souring as he glances away, muttering something angrily under his breath.

       “Excuse me? What'd you say?” I ask, trying to hold the anger out of my tone the best I can. I know what it does to him, the way it smothers the brightness of his eyes and the glow his smile emits.

       “nothing nothing,” Izuku quickly says. I watch as he stands up, walking over to the drums and getting on his knees in front of them, touching every fucking drum. He's on his knees. Touching my drums. He's on his knees. Fuck. Why does it have to be fucking Ochako?  No, it should be me, telling him how good he looks and how amazing he is, then bending him over and absolutely blowing his beautiful fucking back out. 

       “Why the absolute fuck are you touching my drums?” I ask, walking over to him. He looks up at me, and fuck, I wish it were me. I wish it wasn’t my hand earlier. I wish more than anything. He grins. “Cuz’ I like ‘em” he says, and I wish he liked me instead. “That doesn’t mean you have to touch them! Your gettin’ them dirty with your grimy ass hands,” I say. I may be lying because I would not mind those hands over me. Anyways-

       He pouts, and pulls his hands away, standing up and muttering another apology. Guilt washes over me and I want it to go the fuck away. I also want to apologize to him, tell him to sit down, smile warmly, touch them and me all he likes. But I don’t. I don’t, and I hate myself and the look in his eyes. And Ochako, because fuck her. I thought she was gay. The bitch lied I guess.

       Izuku walks around a bit more, going over to my big ass bookshelf, full of books  I've never touched nor read, because who the fuck reads? Izuku beams, looking at every title. “Wow!! How do you have so many? Oh, I've read this one! Oh, and that one, too!” He says. Well, apparently he does, fucking nerd. 

       “They're not mine, the hag gave them to me," I say. Izuku looks at me confused. “Who's ‘the hag’?” Izuku asks. Realization comes across my mind and now I know why he’s confused. “T’s my mom," I replied back. 

       “oh… Why do you call your mom that?” Izuku says. Looking at me from the bookshelf by the window, he turns to the window and stares at his house from across the house. 

       “Because she is a hag," I say back. I look at my phone at the time reading 3:55, Izuku’s only staying here for 5 more minutes. Then he’ll leave and I won’t ser him for 3 fucking days. 

       Izuku’s phone rings, and he answers, “Hey mom! … Oh it is? ... What did you cook? … Oh, you're cooking katsudon? That’s my favorite! Yay, yummy!! I'll be home in 10 minutes. Let me finish tutoring Kacchan … Okay byee! Love you” Izuku hangs up. I wish he was telling me he loved me instead of his mother. So his favorite food is katsudon? Hah, kinda sounds like my first name. Wish it WAS my name. Wish I were his favorite food. He would totally be my favorite food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. 

       He glances around the room, before looking at me with his gorgeous green eyes. I feel dizzy just looking at him, like the world is collapsing, and the ground is coming up and punching me in the face, telling me to fucking snap out of it because he’s with Ochako and not me. Not me. 

       “Well, I guess I should get going,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. He glances around, and I wish he would look at me again. I wish he would take back the words he just said. I wish for a lot of things, I guess. I wish I didn’t have to wish. I wish these wishes actually become reality. But wishes never become true. They are just lies that people think come true, all just a fucking joke. A mental game that controls what you want for the rest of your life. Makes you become greedy for shit you dont need and never will. But,  Izuku is what I need. He is not a want, he's something you'd think about for the rest of your life if you missed the opportunity to have it. It’d feed on your brain and soul until you slowly start to forget little things about them. Like their laugh, and eyes, and smile until you completely forget who they are. How they acted. Or what they were to you, who they were to you. 

       He walks over to the couch and grabs his bag, looking at me. Guess I gotta be a fucking escort. Want a complimentary drink on your way out, too, hoe? I sigh and walk towards the door, and he follows me, taking one last glance around my room, before walking over to the stairs I’ve walked down thousands of times. He walks down them, and towards the front door. He opens it and steps out, looking back at me. This about to be the most awkward fucking goodbye, isn’t it. SZA. 

        “Well… uh.. Bye, Kacchan” he says. Yup. Awkward ass goodbye. What am I even supposed to do? I can’t fucking hug him or kiss him and handshakes are fucking gay, (it might seem crazy what I'm bout to say) flipping him off is out of the question, so what do I do? I shove my hands in my pocket. “Whatever. Bye, nerd” I say, and he looks disappointed. Why are you disappointed? The fuck? What'd you want me to do? Fucking make out with you? Well, I can’t. You chose her. 

        He sticks out his tongue at me and walks out, closing the door behind him. I stand there for a few seconds, just staring at the closed door where so many missed opportunities just walked out. It feels so empty and alone. I walk back up the stairs towards my room, and close the door behind me. I look at where he was sitting a few minutes ago. I wish he would come back.

       I wish.

Chapter Text

My alarm blares, shooting daggers into my head. I groan and roll over, looking up at the stupid clock. It’s been 20 minutes since I laid down. I had to finish an entire essay last night. I forgot it was due because I was so busy thinking about Kacchan to remember.

I sit up, and my whole body protests. It’s screaming at me to lay back down and I want to. Really bad. But I stand up. It feels like my legs are going to give out on me. I fumble towards my closet to get ready. Grabbing a simple outfit of cargo jeans and a T-shirt. But it takes forever. I feel numb, and I can’t see straight. I couldn’t find my shirt or my winter jacket. ”Izuku, honey, are you ready to go? You're going to be late if you don't start walking now,” My mom calls. NO? I’m not? I still need 8 hours to sleep, talk to me later, mother. But I don’t say that. I throw on my clothes, throw down my toothbrush, throw on my red sneakers that I’ve had for 3 years, and gosh, I’m throwing everything!

“Bye mom! See you later!” I call, rushing out the door. “Wait, Izuku, I have a-” but I’m out the door, running down the sidewalk already. I feel like I’m forgetting something, but I don’t care. I run, the wind poking my face with needles, nipping at my skin, searing my lungs. I finally see the school building, and slow down as I walk through the gates. I glance at my watch.

I’m 24 minutes late.

I walk through the door, and ignore the office lady’s yapping because respectfully, shut up. I walk through the halls, and into the history classroom. I also ignore the stares I get from every last one of them, because respectfully, do your work because you’re failing, hun. I sit down, not bothering to look over at Kacchan’s seat because he’s probably sleeping or something. Mr. Aizawa frowns at me. “Why were you late, Midoriya?”

“Because I am? If you wanted me to be early then you should have picked me up yourself,” I say, frowning right back.

“I don't get paid enough for this,” Mr. Aizawa says, sinking into his chair and falling asleep. Oh how I wish I could do the same right now. I’m exhausted.

I look at the board. ‘Do pages 36-46 in your workbooks. It’s due this period and will be graded.’ Of course it will. I glance at the clock. 14 minutes left. I’m dead. Oh boy, I want to take a swan dive. Off of a building, or a cliff.

Instead of thinking of ways to kill myself I should probably actually get to freaking work. I open my workbook and begin to fill out pages faster than I thought I could. Okay, I've finished 2 in a minute, and some of the pages you just have to read. I got this. 11 minutes to go. The third page is easy. I finish it and skip the 4th, going onto page 5 which takes me 3 whole minutes. Crap. Page 6 is easy, and I move onto page 7 which is just reading. Page 8. I'm almost done. 2 more after this one to go. I fill in the boxes on some crap I couldn't care less about and move onto page 9. 6 minutes left. Thank the lord. Page 9 is slightly harder and it takes me 3 more minutes to fill in the notes and answer the 7 questions. Page 10, freaking finally. All I have to do is write a simple paragraph about the hardships companies have to endure because of taxes on imported goods. Easy. I begin writing and I feel my hand begin to cramp up, and it feels like every muscle in my hand is protesting to move. I ignore the protesters, and continue writing.

“Alright, you guys are dismissed… Please don't leave a mess in my room. The custodians have a hard enough job here,” Mr Aizawa says. It’s insanely creepy that somehow he always manages to wake up at the perfect time. I reach over and grab my bag from behind my chair, heaving it up, pulling the straps onto my shoulders, and suddenly I feel like a 64 year old man with a metal rod for a spine, joint problems and scoliosis. I groan internally, because now is Kacchan’s routine time to annoy the fudge out of me. Jerk. Here it comes, his stupid comments. I wait. And wait. Wait a few more seconds before looking up and around the class for him. Kacchan isn't here. Maybe he already left, says my brain, but my heart still aches and my head reels. Why wouldn’t he annoy me? Did I make him mad? What did I do? Can I fix it?

“Midoriya, stop mumbling to yourself and get the hell out of my classroom,” Aizawa says to me pointedly, crossing his arms across his chest. Oh shoot, I’m mumbling again. Well, even worse, I’m standing alone in the middle of the classroom mumbling. I must look retarded.

I flush and quickly walk out of the classroom and begin to head to 2nd period, the feeling of exhaustion crawling through my bones like I’m rusting, the angry hold of it seizing my spine, crawling up to cast its shadows upon my mind. I don’t think I’m going to make it through this period. My 2nd period is math. I have recently learned from eavesdropping that there’s a test in math. Which is fine. I'm good at math. This is fine, I'm fine, this whole day is going to be just FINE. Gosh I absolutely, thoroughly despise that word. I walk into the classroom and sit down, and my head is pounding, like Kacchan is slamming his foot down on the pedal of his bass drum, making my brain ache. The atmosphere of this bleak room is suffocating. I don’t think anyone was prepared for this test, which is apparently 25% of this semester’s grade. Yay!

The teacher starts handing out packets and there are 25 questions. My head is already throbbing, my hand is already cramping, my back is already aching, my eyes are so heavy. It feels like I’m dragging thirty pounds across the paper, trying to read it, trying so desperately to, but I’m not retaining it. I chug a bit of my water. This is easy. I keep telling myself. Math is easy. I drag my eyes over every problem, finishing quicker than I expected. I stand up, trudging over to the teacher’s desk and placing it in the unruly stack of papers. I flop back down in my seat and let my nerves devour my insides like a parasite. I'm not worried about the math test. Not at all. I’m worried about the essay that I stayed up all night working on. I know it sucked because I rushed it, and I was tired, I couldn’t focus, I still can’t focus and all I want to do is go home! I groan, and lay my head down, trying to quash some of the throbbing. I close my eyes, my vision fading to darkness.

“Izuku… wake up the periods over,” someone who I'm really mad at right now says, because why would you wake me up? I groan and lift my head, which feels like an anvil attached to my flimsy neck, and look at the person who just disrupted my dream. Sero. “Thanks for waking me up I guess…” I mutter, and it comes out a bit more aggressive than I intended. Sorry Sero. Wait no, you woke me up. Karma. Finally, I have art. After this I have lunch, where I can sleep, then I have 2 english classes and chemistry, and then I’m released from this prison, allowed to escape this hell and go home to my bed and my mother. But something feels off. Like I’m forgetting something.

Whatever.

I walk through the doorway of the art room, setting down my stuff and sitting beside one of the people who I recognize, from the stage crew. She makes backdrops for the plays. I think her name is Jiro? She’s pretty and has dark purple hair and always has earphones on. I think I heard Kacchan making fun of Kaminari about liking her once, but Kaminari would take any girl who pays him a lick of attention. She smiles at me and I return it as best as I can, but my face still feels heavy and my mouth feels numb. I grab a mechanical pencil from my bag and start doodling absentmindedly on my notebook cover, scribbling odd shapes and endless circles, awkward facial features and, a horrible attempt at Kacchan while I wait for Ms. Midnight to begin teaching the class. I feel thick and groggy, like there are weights pulling me down and magnets closing my eyes shut. I begin to hear a faint sound of talking but I tune it out, too focused on trying to not completely pass out.

Ms. Midnight talks about stuff I don’t hear, explains things I can’t understand in this state. I’m too tired to hear, too tired to care. Why did I stay up all night? So I can't finish an essay and not fail it? I’ll probably fail it anyway. Why wasn’t I prepared? I’m always prepared. Ms. Midnight is blurry. Why are there 2 of her? I close my eyes, trying to get rid of the dizziness. Yeah, that’s better. Much better.

“Midoriya? Boy, we’re 20 minutes into lunch! When was the last time you slept? A decade ago? Goodness! Go eat something, you’re skin and bones” I hear Ms. Midnight say. I lift my head. What? I didn’t fall asleep, I feel like I’ve been awake the whole time! I stand up and look around. Everybody’s gone. Oh. I grab my stuff, and hurry out, muttering an apology to Ms. Midnight. I have to rush to lunch, and by the time I get there, lunch is being dismissed. What? I was walking so fast! There’s no way that 10 minute walk took 20 minutes! I step to the side as students shove past me. If they’re being dismissed, then my next period is LA. Dang it. Poetry.

I hate poetry.

I trudge after the mob of idiots, taking as long as possible to get to that class. Well, not as long as possible, cause if I was really trying, I could’ve just collapsed. That sounds nice. I walk into the classroom and guess what pops up? A pop quiz. The only thing I want to pop right now is my head. POP! Dead. all my problems are solved. I collapse in my seat, dropping my stuff and staring at the paper in front of me. Thirty. Five. Questions. And. A. Writing. Response. Why? What do you mean ‘pop quiz’ THIS IS AN EXAM??

I grab my pencil, glaring at the teacher. He looks up at me, and I see fear in his eyes. Am I that scary? I better be. I’m about to commit arson. Or suicide. Or both. I look at the questions, and my head reels. I answer the best I can, but respectfully I don’t care. In the writing response, I scribble down whatever comes to my mind. I throw in a few words that sound smart I don’t know the meaning to, and call it a day. The bell rings, and I shoot up, the whole room spinning, rotating without me. I stumble to the teacher’s desk, my feet weighed down by sleep. I grab my stuff and walk to my doom. The class I’ve been dreading.

I walk in. Language Arts. When I walk in, the teacher looks at me, and I see disgust on her face. You know what, hun? I should be the one who’s disgusted. With all due respect I hope your hair begins to slowly fall out and leave your egg shaped head until you become bald. Actually that might be better than your already nasty ass hair. I sit down in my seat, throwing my stuff beside my desk. She stands up, somehow, and turns on her smart board. There's an essay on it. My stomach drops, and I feel light headed. It’s mine. It’s MY essay on her board. MINE. And for some reason I couldn’t tell you, almost everything is highlighted red. A big. Fat. TWENTY. is plastered across the top. I feel the desk fall out from beneath me, the room spinning, my vision going blurry. Somehow this is worse than a zero. I don’t know how, but it is. I grip the desk as the other students gawk at the essay on the board. MY essay on the board. The beluga whale of a teacher turns to it, and extends her stupid pointer because apparently her arm fat is weighing down her ACTUAL arm. Looking like a prehistoric bird with that skin flap, and taps on the smart board.

“This essay, students, is a perfect example of procrastination and horrible planning. This is what you DON’T do” She says, and I feel anger shoving my tears away, searing them.

“The only person ‘procrastinating’ is you, postponing your much needed hair appointments," I mumble. If she wants to be rude, then come at me because after all the SHIT that has happened today, I very much need someone to get angry at.

“Excuse me? If you want to say something, then say it to the whole class, because I’m sure we ALL want to hear it. Come on, don’t be-” the thing starts, but I’m sick of her voice. I stand up.

“I SAID,” I clear my throat, because maybe she needs me to yell, “That the only one procrastinating is you, postponing all your much needed hair appointments”

She looks at me like I just told her she was an ugly whore. Well, I could’ve, but she doesn’t get any men so she can’t be a whore and lying is a sin. “out of my classroom” she barks.

“Don’t threaten me with a good time!” I shout back and walk out, slamming the door behind me. I let out a heavy breath, and lean against the wall beside the door. I stand there for a solid moment, staring at the ground because I don’t think the weight of my actions will allow me to move my eyes. I just yelled at a teacher. I just got a 20 on an essay. A 20. I feel my bottom lip quiver, and my vision starts to blur again, and I try to blink away the tears, but they won’t go away, they’re burning my eyes and scorching my tear ducts, and soon they’re spilling out before I can stop them, flowing from my eyes faster than I thought they would. My throat burns, and I sink down the wall, my chest aching, exhaustion and sadness I didn’t expect crushing my lungs and suffocating me. I choke on my tears, burying my face in my sleeve and suppressing a sob. I hate today. Another sob rocks my body, and my lungs are out of air. I suck in a breath, choking on spit and coughing harshly. I sniffle, wiping my eyes furiously. This is humiliating even when I’m alone.

I rub my eyes, standing up. My head spins, and I fall against the wall. I walk. I walk for a while. I stop in front of the counselor's office, and knock on the door. “Come in,” says a familiar voice. I open the door. I love his office, full of comforting reds and blues and yellows, a bit of white. “Hey, Yagi” I try, but my voice is hoarse from crying.

“Ah, young Midoriya, what brings you to my office, in such a crying mess?? Yagi questions, his eyes filled with a concern that I’ve been desperately needing for days, but they’re the wrong eyes. They aren’t red. “how may I help you?" He continues.

“I..” I feel my eyes start to burn again, and I blink it away. “T-this… has been the w-worst. Day. OF MY LIFE!!” I rub my eyes, and look at him.

“How come? I may be better at coaching basketball, but I’m your counselor too. Talk to me” Yagi says, smiling warmly at me. So I will explain. The whole thing. I explain how I had to tutor Kacchan, how I had to stay up all night to write the essay, how I was late, how I had a test in basically every class, how I fell asleep in every class. How my teacher humiliated me in front of the whole class. I leave out the worst part. The one that devastated me the most. The fact that Kacchan isn’t here and he didn’t tell me why, either. He had all day yesterday to do so much as MENTION it and he didn’t. Jerk.

“Well… Midoriya that sounds...” Yagi starts, rubbing the back of his neck. “Awful? Horrible?” I try, looking at him with wide eyes. “Uh.. no I was going to say unfortunate… uh.. how about you sleep in here and I'll clear some of the problems from today? I'll move you to a different LA 2 and you'll also be less tired,” Yagi says, and I feel the weight that has been crushing my lungs all day ease. “That…” I start, “Sounds great. Thanks Yagi…”

“Go lay down on my couch, and please don’t mind me being here. Get some of that much needed rest!” mr. Yagi says, his voice a bit too loud for my ears. I cringe but don't say anything. I walk over to the couch, rubbing my eyes and sitting down on it, curling into a ball. I feel the tension in my back and soldiers release, and my head finally starts pounding as I fade away faster than I thought possible. Finally, some sleep. Thanks, Yagi.

“Young Midoriya! Young Midoriya, get up. I tried waking you right before your last period, but you wouldn’t budge, so I just left you. I do believe you have tryouts for parts in you guys’ next big play, right? You should get going” Yagi’s voice says, easing me awake. I feel better, but still a bit tired. Thank god it’s Friday. I sit up, stretching. My back pops like I just started up a chainsaw, and Yagi chuckles.

I stand, and walk out after nodding a quick thanks and goodbye to Yagi. He really is All Mighty. I rushed to the Theatre. I hear Mina’s melodic voice, and laugh as she sings. She’s always so enthusiastic. She’s jumping around the stage when I walk in, grinning.

I sit down in a chair next to Ochako and sigh, sinking down into it. “Who are you trying out for?” She asks, smiling at me. Maybe she doesn’t notice the look on my face. I hope she doesn’t.

“The male lead” I say back. My voice is still scratchy, and I clear my throat. Mina grins as she finishes her song and bows. “Thank you!” She says, hopping off the stage.

“Okay, next trying out for the female lead is Nejire Hado!” says the drama teacher, Mirko, “Whenever you’re ready.”

“Okay” Nejire says, smiling.

Nejire began to sing and the sounds of beautiful choros rang out through the theater. People watched entranced, as Nejire began twirling and dancing on stage. Her voice was like a siren controlling how the people acted and her body language showed just enough emotion throughout the song. Just as the song began it quickly stopped and everyone clapped and applauded.

“Great job Nejire! Now we will begin the male lead, uhhh.. first up Izuku Midoriya,” Mirko says. I feel an icy sweat start to creep up my neck, and my palms are sweating. My body is thrumming with nerves, and I feel like I’m sweating gallons. I stand up and walk up onto the stage, fumbling as I take the mic from Nejire. I wait for the speakers to start playing the song’s instrumental version of the popular song ‘Teenage dirtbag’ . I clear my throat. Here it goes.

“Her name is Noelle” my voice begins to ring around the theater and everyone's eyes are on me and I want them to look away and keep staring at the same time. “I had a dream about her” I bring the mic closer to my mouth placing my hand on my chest. “She rings my bell. I got gym class in half an hour” I begin moving to the right of the stage remembering my choreography “Oh how she rocks, In keds and tube socks”

I get ready for the main chorus, closing my eyes and starting the build. “But she doesn't know who I am” I open my eyes and look directly into Mirkos eyes. “And she doesn't give a damn about me”

“'Cause I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby” I sing out, making sure to hit the accent perfectly. “Yeah I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby” My voice rings through the theatre and I feel everyone watching me. The judges look satisfied, but… “Listen to Iron Maiden baby with me”

This part makes me slightly nervous. They said cussing was fine but I’ve never really liked cussing.“Her boyfriend's a dick..” I continued. “He brings a gun to school, And he'd simply kick my ass if he knew the truth” I love this song, in fact it's one of my favorites. I just wish Kacchan was here watching me. “He lives on my block and he drives an Iroc”, ironic because an Iroc is one of my dream cars, I've always thought they looked cool. “But he doesn't know who I am” I get ready for the chorus and plant a hand on my chest so I can genuinely sing. “And he doesn't give a damn about me”

“'Cause I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby!” I start singing, louder and more genuine into the mic than before, still keeping the accent that Wheatus did. “Yeah I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby!” I begin gaining slight confidence and sing the rest of the chorus. “Listen to Iron Maiden baby with me” Now for the last bit, then I can leave, and hopefully that stupid teacher from earlier isn't in her class because I still need to grab my stuff.

“Oh yeah, dirtbag.. She doesn't know what she's missing” This is one of my favorite parts of the song also. “Oh yeah” “Dirtbag” reminds me of someone from my old school… “She doesn't know what she's missing”

I start on the last part of the song “Man I feel like mold” I mean I really do right now. “It's prom night and I am lonely” “Low and behold” Mirko is watching me fairly intently, and I try not to stutter over the words. “She's walking over to me” “This must be fake” This song kind of reminds me of me and Kacchan, not that we're a love story or anything… “My lips start to shake” “How does she know who I am” No really? How does he know who I am? “And why does she give a damn about me” Why does he give a damn about me?

I make my voice tiny and slightly more high pitched, I've been told I have great control over my vocals. “I got two tickets to Iron Maiden baby.. Come with me Friday, don't say maybe.. I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby” Maybe this song really is about me and Kacchan. “Like you”

“Oooh”

This is it, the last part of the song. “Oh yeah, dirtbag.. She doesn't know what she's missing!” I hope Kacchan knows what he's missing. Mina said to make him jealous, so that’s what I’m doing. “Oh yeah, dirtbag.. She doesn't know what she's missing!” I finish off the song and everyone begins to applaud. I smile, bow enthusiastically, my bad mood suddenly fluttering away. I feel light, and calmed, and replenished, like I always do after singing. I skip off the stage. I don’t stay and listen to the other’s auditions. I want to go home.

I walk out of the theatre, and start making my way back to HER classroom. I peek into the room, and let out a sigh of relief when I don’t see her. I slink across the room to my desk, grabbing my bag. I pull the straps onto my shoulders, and turn to walk out. She’s staring down at me, and I feel my palms start to sweat. My eyes widen slightly and I take a step back.I’m terrified. I feel icy chills claw their way up my spine, clutching at my neck, trying to rip my hair out and through my skull into my brain. I can’t breathe, my lungs frozen over, and I can’t tell if my heart is beating or not. I just want to leave.

“Izuku Midoriya… You have the audacity to call me names, leave my class, disrespect me in front of my whole class, and come back? You are a mistake of a child and I hope to never see you step into my classroom, you are ugly and short and should have never gotten the chance to learn. You being here is a waste of air and space. Now leave my classroom. NOW!” she yells.

I feel the bleak classroom get sucked away, or maybe I’m the one getting swallowed. My throat is tight and I can’t speak, my lungs locking up. My bottom lip quivers and my eyes sting, and before I can stop them, the tears burst in uninvited, parading down my face, overflowing. I sob, stumbling and darting around the teacher and out of the classroom. I bolt for the door, shoving them open. Almost immediately, I’m drenched. The bottom of the sky is falling out, mirroring the way I feel. I shove my dripping hair out of my eyes, and start booking it down the sidewalk. The wind pushes against me as I run, the cold air plunging its sharp, unforgiving fingers into my body, attempting to freeze my soul.

I make it about 5 blocks, when I trip on my shoelace. The world rocks and tilts around me, making me dizzy, and I can’t find my footing in time. I crash into a giant, oozing puddle of mud on the sidewalk, landing on my hands and knees. I stare at the disgusting brown liquid I’m sitting in, and more sobs rock my body. This is horrible. I sniffle and stand up, shaking out my hair. I look up seconds before 3 cars fly past me, each one spraying me in road piss, or whatever it is. All I can tell you is that it tastes like dirt and gas.

I begin to sob harder, and my lungs are aching, begging me for more air. I start running again. I just want to get home. My eyes feel puffy and sore and my legs are aching, every muscle crying out to my mind in agony. I see my house through the haze of hard, pouring rain and tears. I run up the front steps and crash into the door, breathing hard, relief flooding my whole body, soothing every ache. I reach for the handle and turn. Try to turn. It doesn’t budge. Mom never locks the doors after school. I look over at the driveway, seeing it empty. Realization crashes into me, and I start to cry again.

Mom has a doctor’s appointment today. She won’t be home for another 4 or 5 hours. All of the relief I just felt suddenly gets extinguished. My anxiety spikes up and panic is trying to grasp me, trying to get a hold on my heart, and it’s working. My heart is having a seizure, and I can’t focus. I sink to my knees, black blurry spots in my vision. Despair fills my whole body, and I clutch my stomach, wrapping my arms around myself. The world is spinning still, but I’m not spinning with it anymore, and I’m dizzy. My lungs aren’t working like they should. They’re too fast. Too fast, too fast, what do I do, what am I supposed to do. I look around, trying to find something, anything to grasp onto. I need something... my eyes snag on Kacchan’s house. Kacchan. I can go to Kacchan’s house. I stand up, and my knees sting. I glance down at myself, and see that they’re bleeding. Probably from my fall earlier. That’s fine.. But… But… I look disgusting. I feel disgusting. I close my eyes, trying to calm my frenzied breathing and aching heart. I can’t relax. I start walking, the rain pelting down on me, the wind whipping around me, trying to take me away.

My arms wrapped around my waist and chest, I approach his front door. My soggy, muddy red shoes squelching as I walk up the front steps. I stand there for a moment, staring at the doorbell. It taunts me for what feels like ages, mocking me, telling me that I’m pathetic. I know. But this isn’t about that. I just need… someone. I swallow my pride, or what’s left of it, and hit the doorbells harder than necessary in my attempt to do it before I can tell myself otherwise. After a minute or two without a response, I knock on the door instead of ringing the doorbell. I hear a muffled yell that sounds something like, ‘I'm coming, I'm coming!’ and a few seconds later the door swings open. I see Kacchan's spiky blond hair and his captivating red eyes, I feel my chest tighten and my bottom lip quiver.

“K-kacchan…” is all I can get out before I start to sob, my hands moving over my face as I cry because maybe if i can't see anything around me it'll go away. I feel my heart sink in humiliation and despair, and I curl into myself, trying to bring it back up. I feel his eyes on me, and I swear he’s judging me. He’s probably thinking I’m a weirdo who’s gone completely insane. Maybe he’ll close the door in my face and leave me to drown in this pool of humiliation I’ve set up for myself. I look up to meet his eyes. I see no judgement. He looks concerned, surprised, and sad.

“Izuku… baby, are you okay? what happened to you?” He asks, grabbing my arm and pulling me inside. I let him drag me in, watching as he closes the door behind me. I feel his arms wrap around me as he pulls me into a hug. His chest is warm, and hard and so nice. I feel all the horrible emotions from today start to fade away, like he's pulling them closer to him and discarding them. I want him to pull me closer, hold me closer and make it all go away. I wrap my arms around his torso and begin to sob into his chest. I can't bear it, whatever it is I've been feeling all day, and now I don't have to. Kacchan is here now, and his arms are touching me and holding me and now they're all I can feel. They're all I want to feel. He stays quiet, his hands rubbing calm, soothing patterns up and down my back.

We stay like this for however long, but I wish it were longer. My heart isn't throbbing or beating erratically. My lungs have clean air. My sobs have dried up. My nose is slightly runny and I feel my hair dripping water down my back. I look down at my feet, humiliation still feasting on my poor heart. I feel a finger under my chin, and suddenly I'm staring into his eyes instead of my shoes. I'm looking at him, and my lungs are robbed of air for what feels like the hundredth time today, but this time I don't mind. My heart is beating too fast again, but this time I don't mind. I feel heat traveling up my neck instead of ice, the warmth dancing across my face with my freckles, spilling elegant circles with them.

“What's wrong baby?” Katsuki asks, staring into my eyes as if he's looking for the answer. I feel a chill slide down my spine, spreading down to my arms, my legs, and I shiver. Baby? I bite my bottom lip. I can't get rid of the feelings from earlier, but Kacchan is all I can focus on. He's adding to the pile of emotions, sending them all to war with each other. I want to tell him everything so he can make it go away. “It's a long story…” I mutter, trying to avoid eye contact. I want to tell him, but I don't want him to judge me. I feel one of his arms tighten around my waist, and he pulls the other one away, rubbing one of his eyes gently.

“I've got time,” he says quietly. The finger under my chin moves to my cheek and wipes off tears and mud.

I swallow and glance around the room. Nerves and embarrassment are eating me away, and I fear I'll suddenly disappear because of them. I take a deep breath, possibly because I'm trying to suck in as much courage as possible. Here it goes. I exhale, and start to explain my awful day, from staying up late for the essay to getting yelled at by a teacher. My eyes are starting to sting again, and my legs are trying to give out on me. I bet he's gonna laugh. I bet he's gonna tell me I'm pathetic, like I need a reminder. I finally look up and meet his ruby red eyes so deep, and filled to the brim with anger, sadness, and understanding.

I forgot to add what the teacher said. I swallow, and rub the back of my neck, “The teacher said, ‘You are a mistake of a child and I hope to never see you step into my classroom. You are ugly and short and should have never gotten the chance to learn. You being here is a waste of air and space.’” I say, and my vision gets blurry, my eyes threatening to spill more tears even though I think there aren't any left to cry.

Kacchan quiets again, and I watch as the sadness and understanding fades from his gaze, and the anger molds into rage. “She. Said. What?” He hisses. “IT said what?? I swear to god I’m going to kill that fucking teacher if it's the last thing I do” his teeth are gritted and his grip tightens around me.

“Kacchan… this really isn't something you should stress out over! You're overreacting!!” I say, one of my hands pushing against Kacchan's chest. I try to ignore the way it feels against my palm, but it’s very, very difficult. He took a deep breath, glaring off to the side. “Just finish your damn story..” Kacchan says, his free fist clenching by his side.

I nod, trying to remember where I left off. “Um…” I mumble, trying to remember but I can’t. “Start with why the hell you’re so dirty” Kacchan suggests, and I nod, sniffling. “Well… I ran almost all the way back home and on the way I tripped and landed in mud… Then as I was getting up 3 cars splashed me with the nasty stuff that's in the puddles on the road. When I finally got home I remembered that my mom had a doctor's appointment and locked the door so I was dirty and cold and started having a panic attack and the only place I could go was here and…” I say, and my voice starts to quiver. I swallow, trying to wet my mouth, but it didn’t do anything.

“Izuku,” Katsuki says, “Breathe," I glance down at my feet again, ashamed of the way I feel, just because he said my name. He moves the finger that he had on my cheek away, tilting my head back up to look at him. I try to avoid looking into his eyes, feeling embarrassed and flustered at the same time.

“Huh?” I just now realized that he’s said something.

“You need to breathe,” Katsuki continues. I gaze into his eyes, and I think my ribcage is going to fall out because of how hard my heart is pounding. I still don’t understand why I feel like this because of him, but I do and I don’t know how to stop it, or if I even want to.

You need to breathe. His words repeat in my head, over and over, like an echo that isn’t getting any farther away. Breathe. “Right…” I say, allowing my lungs to push out the air that was trapped in there. I shake my head and look up at him, and I feel like holding my breath again. I want my lungs to work properly, I want them to push and pull air evenly, but they won't. I want my heart to work properly, to send blood through my arteries at a normal, slower speed, but it won’t. He’s ruining me.

“Izuku, you’re fine now. Everything is fine. I’ll see what I can do about the teacher, but right now, you need to see what you can do about a shower. You remember where the bathroom is, right?” Katsuki asks, looking down at me. Of course I do. It’s in his room, beside that massive bookshelf. I nod. “Alright. You go shower. Leave your clothes outside the door and I’ll wash them with my stuff,” he says. I don’t think his eyes have ever been this soft. I don’t think he’s ever spoken this quietly before, and it scares me, what it does to me.

I pull away from his hands and make my way up the stairs to his room, and then his bathroom. I peel the dirty, muddy shirt off, and then the rest of my clothes, and leave them outside like Kacchan said. I turn on the shower, and turn the handle until it’s as far into the red as it can get, and step in. I let the scalding hot water engulf me, drown me until I can’t hear anything, my body turning numb along with my senses and mind.

You’re fine now. Everything is fine.

Chapter Text

Wet footsteps come down the stairs, and I look up. Though now I wish I hadn't, because now I can’t look away even if I were held at gunpoint. Thighs. Thick beautiful fucking thighs. Legs and a body that makes me wish I had photographic memory. Eyes, filled with so much to tell, you could write a whole play. You could write the choreography with all the emotions, the songs with life dancing in his eyes. You could plan a whole future in the eyes of Izuku. And I’m not in it. Ochako is. My hands stop moving from their current task of collecting all the ingredients for katsudon, but I don’t care. Katsudon can wait.

 “Uh.. Kacchan, I don’t have any clothes to change into,” Izuku says, and I look up at his face. He’s colored bright red. He’s so cute when he’s embarrassed. Too bad he’s dating Ochako… You couldn't get to him first and now you have to live with that fact, face it. You're a horrible person, you don't and will never deserve someone as perfect as him. My thoughts swirl, dancing out of my control, saying things without my permission. That particular thought pisses me off. 

 “I can fix that,” I mutter, making my way up the stairs, past Izuku and towards my bedroom, heading into my closet. Izuku follows me, trailing behind me into the closet. I walk over to the dresser pushed against one of the walls and open the bottom drawer, and throw a pair of grey sweatpants at him, followed by my favorite black shirt. 

 “No underwear?” he asks. Electric shocks shoot down my spine, and I shiver, feeling his eyes on me. Did he just ask for a pair of my underwear? For HIM to wear? I turn around to look at him. I lean my head back, looking down at him, and I watch as he turns bright red again.

“Now… Do you really want to wear my underwear?” I ask, and he closes his eyes, burying his face in the sweatpants. He turns his back to me. I study the muscles that shift and ripple under his skin as he breathes. “No. It was a stupid question. Forget I said anything” He mumbles, and I can’t stop myself. 

“No, no, go ahead wear my under-” 

 “Shut up, Kacchan!” He squeaks, cutting me off. I let out a laugh. I don’t think he’s ever been this red before. It’s fucking adorable. He huffs and walks out of my closet away from me, and I take a few steps after him to watch him walk away and into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Since when is Izuku so muscular? S’no fair, the little shit. 

 I step out of the closet, my eyes going directly to the bathroom door. The same room that I fucking jacked off in yesterday. And the person who's in it is also the person I jacked off to. Fuck. Fuck him actually. Please. 

 I want to walk over there. I want to walk over to that door and kick the damn thing down. I want to see him again. It aches when he’s not in my sight and it pisses me off how much I want him near me. I’ve only known this guy for a week and I feel like I wouldn’t survive in this world if I lost him. I don’t even know how I’ve made it this far without knowing this guy. 

I shake my head, running my hands down my face. I turn around and walk down the stairs and into the kitchen, opening the fridge and grabbing the remaining ingredients for katsudon. I don’t grab as much pork, considering it's only me and Izuku in the house. 

I slide the pork onto my cutting board, making little slits in the meat with the knife. I freeze when the sound of footsteps start coming down the stairs, the soft patter of it echoing through the house. Izuku descends his way down the stairs, and I can’t stop my eyes from making their own descent, from his gorgeous, damp green hair, down his face and torso, which is covered by my black t-shirt. Down and down my eyes continue, to his legs, which were adorned in my grey sweatpants. The fabric was strained at his thighs but pooling at his ankles at the same time, and I wish they weren’t there at all. I look back up at his face, meeting his eyes. 

“Whatcha cookin Kacchan?" Izuku chirps, walking over to me. He peers over my arm at my hands, which were stopped on the cutting board. He sniffs at the air, as if there was something to smell. I haven’t started cooking it yet, so there’s no way he smells anything other than raw meat.

“Katsudon. I just started making it though, so don't expect to eat it right now. It'll be done in like.. Eh, 20 minutes,” I mutter, grabbing the tenderizer and poking small holes into the pork. 

“Katsudon?! That's my favorite! You should show me how to make it…" Izuku says excitedly from beside me. I look at him out of the corner of my eye, and I see him looking up at me, his eyes shining, glowing like emeralds glittering in the sunlight. I see fireworks going off in them, exploding, each one filled with color and emotion more powerful than words. "Please,” he begs, and I feel my stomach twist, my insides bursting just like the fireworks in his eyes. I already knew from the start that I wouldn’t ever be able to resist him if he begged, but in my mind he was always begging for something else, someone else. Too bad dreams are always too far fetched to be reality. 

“fine…” I sigh, repeating the same process as before to the other piece of pork, "Right now, I'm tenderizing the meat. After I do this, then I'm going to begin breading it” Izuku’s eyes eagerly watch my hands move, watch as I season the pork with salt and pepper. He stands there, his face not half a foot from my arm, and watches. I’m not sure he’s ever stopped muttering for this long.

I glance up at the pan on the counter that I had placed there earlier. “Can you pour some rice oil into that pan, Izuku?” I ask, "Not much, Just enough to cover the meat," Izuku nods and walks over to the pan, pouring the oil in. He looks at me a few times as he does this, his top teeth digging into his bottom lip. 

“First, I'm going to bread the pork with flour and dust off any excess," Izuku watches my hands as I do this, his brow furrows in concentration, his eyes sparkling as he nods, “Next, I'm going to set it into the egg mixture." Izuku walks back over to my side as I dip the pork into the egg. “Then I dip the pork in panko breadcrumbs and firmly press down,"  

Izuku nods again, watching as I set the pork down in a small tray. “Your turn, I-zu-ku” I say with a smirk, "Wash your hands first though, I don't want your nasty hands all over the food that I’m going to be putting in my mouth”

Izuku’s eyes widen as he looks up at me, his jaw slacking like I just said the most absurd thing he’s ever heard. “Me? Cooking? Kacchan I can't cook!” Izuku exclaims. I roll my eyes, pushing him towards the sink."I'm serious Kacchan, the only thing I can do in the kitchen is bake,” Izuku whines. 

“You'll be fine. It's just some katsudon, it isn’t that hard," I say back, turning on the sink and grabbing the hand soap. “Put out your hands," I say. Izuku listens, his cheeks sting a soft red, the color dancing with his freckles to the rhythm of his heartbeat and the melody of his emotions. He reluctantly puts his hands out in front of him, and I squirt the hand soap on his hands, and he begins rubbing his hands together, lathering them until the thick liquid shifts to suds. He rinses off the suds and dries his hands, looking up at me indignantly, as if he’d just beat me at something I was really looking forward to winning. We stare at each other for a long moment, and I think I set the thermostat too hot because I’m sweating buckets and my heart is racing, faster than what I’m sure is healthy. 

I rip my eyes away from him, walking away and over to the thermostat on the wall, 68 degrees? That isn’t hot at all. I glare at the thermostat, because there’s no fucking way I was blushing because of Izuku. This little thing is fucking with me, and when I finally get proof, I’m gonna rip it out of the wall and get a cheap one. I pretend to press a few buttons so I don’t look like an idiot in front of Izuku, and walk back over to find Izuku standing where I was earlier, picking up the piece of pork that I already tenderized. 

“So I set it in the flour?" Izuku asks. His eyes study my face, roaming over me like I’m the pork. I nod, shaking away my thoughts "Yup. Then put it in the egg mix, and then the panko breadcrumbs," I add, and Izuku follows the instructions. He sets the pork down in the flour, making sure it's fully covered before dusting off the excess. After that, he sets it in the egg mix, then into the breadcrumbs. His eyebrows are furrowed in concentration, his top teeth biting at his bottom lip, holding it like it was his lifeline. His hands are shaking slightly, and I can legit see a sheen of sweat starting to make his forehead shine. Why is he so nervous?

I watch as he barely touches the meat as he presses it into the breadcrumbs, like he’s afraid the breadcrumbs are going to jump up and bite him. I reach out, placing my hands over the tops of his and press them down harder into the crumbs. “You have to make sure to firmly press the breadcrumbs in 'cuz the crust might fall off while it's frying,” I say. Izuku nods furiously, his whole face flushing a bright red as he presses the pork down harder than before. I want to leave my hands there, to leave them covering his, the back of his soft hands flush with my palms. How easy it would be to leave my hands like this, how easy the excuse would be, but I pull them away, shoving them into my pants pockets like the pathetic, cowardly bitch I am. 

Izuku tenderly pulls the pork out of the bread crumbs, placing it into the tray I put there earlier while laying out the things I needed to make katsudon. “Now we gotta fry it. Don’t flip it too much or the crust’ll fall off. It usually only takes about 3 minutes per side to get it nice and crispy” I explain, reaching across him and grabbing the small tray that holds the pork. Izuku squeaks, his eyes wide as he stares down at my arm that’s a few inches from his face. He flushes subtly, and I suppress the shiver that threatens to run down my spine, siege through my veins, pummel into my brain like a typhoon, and it's all elicited from the look in his eyes. The look that too much of something I desperately wanted to see. 

I walk over to the stove top where the pan of oil is, dropping a cooking thermometer into it and flicking the glass covering to make sure it wasn’t stuck. 400 degrees. Perfect. “Izuku? Come here. Gotta show you how to put the pork in the oil," I state, wiggling my finger at him to call him over to where I stood. He drags his feet over, sliding in beside me reluctantly and eyeing the pan. He looks back up at me indignantly, a frown set on his face. My heart lurches, and I think my lungs are failing because all of a sudden I can’t breathe. My head is spinning and my heart is racing and I swear my trachea is closing up. I start coughing, but cover it with a laugh. “What’s so funny?” He splutters, looking up at me with wide eyes. I shake my head, clearing my throat when I feel like I can finally breathe.

“Just drop them in and set a timer for like… 3 minutes and then flip them over with the tongs,” I explain as I walk over to the cabinet opposite of the stove, grabbing the handle to open it. I rummage through the cabinet, trying to find the bag of rice, but it isn’t in its usual spot. I shove a bag of sugar out of the way, along with some baking spray and a half used bag of flour that’s been in there since the start of the roman empire in 27BC. I reach around the ancient flour, feeling for the bag of rice. My hand hits something, and I snatch it out of the cabinet. Thank god. I close the cabinet with a heavy, dramatic sigh and an eye roll, walking back over to stand behind Izuku.

I swallow as I peer over his shoulder. I already know I’m too close, because I can smell him. I can smell the smoky, rich scent of charcoal body wash. My charcoal body wash. I move my face beside his ear, tilting my head. “You should flip it now," I whisper softly into his ear. Izuku jumps, his ears and cheeks turning a bright red. He fumbles with the tongs for a minute, accidentally dropping them back down onto the counter not once, not twice, but three times, until he finally manages to get them in his hand and over to the pan, flipping the pork over quickly. I swallow, “Make sure to be careful when flipping it over. You don't want the crust falling off…" I add as I walk over to the steamer, already sitting on the counter, waiting for the rice, and begin putting it in. Izuku nods, looking down at the pork with his brows furrowed in concentration and his tongue stuck out of the corner of his mouth like a child. 

“Hey, can I turn on some music?” Izuku asks, pulling his phone out of his pocket. His eyes are searching my face, their jade depths full of emotion. If each emotion were a drop of water, then his eyes would be like oceans, smooth and calm, right after a storm. I feel like leaping into them, swimming down into their darkest depths to see what secrets they hold. I want to be the one to discover his mysteries, uncover his secrets. He clears his throat, pulling me back out of the water. I blink, and look back at what I’m doing. I plate Izuku's food and then mine.

“I mean.. sure? I don't really care," I mutter with a shrug, grabbing our plates and taking them over to the table. I wonder what he listens to? Maybe pop, or country. Or.. nah, he wouldn’t listen to too much rock. He doesn’t seem the type. Hah! Maybe the fucker listens to classical music. Yeah, the fuckin’ weirdo. Out in the supermarket listening to Beethoven… Wait, I did that Tuesday. Fuck, does that make me a weir-

Feel good Inc by the Gorillaz starts playing, snatching me out of my thoughts. I look up at Izuku as he sits down across from me at the table, and I can already tell that I’m gaping at him like an idiot because of the shit eating grin on his face. He listens to fucking hip-hop? Why didn’t I guess that? He turns up the volume, the beat ringing throughout the kitchen, making Izuku smile. “I love this song,” Izuku whispers, just loud enough for me to hear. 

The beat plays, repeating over and over again, in a way that you’d think would get annoying, the continuous loop. I shove a bite of the katsudon into my mouth, the flavors exploding and swirling. 

City’s breaking down on a camel’s back

They just have to go,‘cause they don't know wack

“It is a good song," I mutter in agreement to his previous, shoving another bite into my mouth. I didn’t realize how hungry I was until I took a bite. 

Laughin’ gas these hazmats, fast cats

Linin’ em up like ass cracks 

Play these ponies at the track

It's my chocolate attack

Izuku bobs his head slightly to the beat of the music, his hand finding the spoon resting on the table beside him, picking it up. He lifts it up and into the bowl, adjusting his grip before scooping up the mixture of rice, pork, egg, and seasoning. He eyes a portion of it that looks like it’s about to fall off, before quickly bringing it to his mouth using his tongue to keep the chunk of rice from falling. Izuku lets a soft, satisfied moan fall from his perfect pink lips as he chews, his eyes roll back slightly before they close. My stomach flips and my head spins, a hot, buzzing feeling spreading throughout my body, sliding down every artery, up every vein and back down again, to my dick. I gape at him, shifting in my seat. That was the most sinful, ungodly sound I’ve ever heard in my life. I fucking want it. I want to hear it again and again, I want it to be mine. I want to hear it, a new one being elicited each time I slam into him from behind. I wish he were mine.

“Holy moly, Kacchan, this katsudon is so freaking goooood~” Izuku whines, opening his eyes to look at me as he swallows. It's such a sinful sound. I feel it, I feel it burning and sliding its way around, coursing through me like the devil’s hands, reaching out and grabbing me, his dark, deadly fingers wrapping around my spine and pulling me down to the depths of hell with him. I’m a walking talking imperfection. 

Unlike Izuku. 

He's perfect. I've been told time and time again, over and over for my whole life that nothing is perfect, nothing at all. How can that be? How can someone tell me that nothing is perfect, when I’m staring into the eyes of perfection right now? Who’s to say what the definition of perfect really is? Your definition of perfect is something that only you can describe. It's an opinion, not anything factual. Perfection is different and unique for anyone. Something flawless to me may be nothing but flawed to Kirishima. Izuku is perfect. He’s flawless. He's my definition of perfect. 

“Zuku, quit moanin’ over it," I say, taking another bite of my own food. Izuku looks back at me, embarrassment in his eyes. His ears and cheeks turn a soft pink, the light, prominent color sliding onto the dancefloor of his face and starting to slow dance with his freckles, spinning endless, lazy circles with them. He mutters a quick apology and continues eating, shoveling the bites of food into his mouth like a big ass obese kid that’s been fasting for 20 minutes. 

“Slow down, you'll get sick," I bark, dropping my chopsticks and reaching out a hand across the table, stopping Izuku from bringing the next bite of food into his mouth, “Did you not eat today… or…?" Izuku looks up at me, a bit of rice on his chin. I reach out, as casual as possible even though I don’t think I’ve ever been this turned on, and brush the rice off his chin. He flushes slightly darker and glances away, chewing up the remaining food in his mouth and swallowing before responding. 

“I didn't have time for breakfast this morning because I woke up late, and I accidentally slept all throughout lunch… So no, I didn't get to eat," Izuku says, his face morphing from embarrassment to guilt. My heart aches and my chest tightens. I look down at him as he starts to put the spoons down.

“No no, you don't have to stop eating, dumbass! Keep eating! You’re going to evaporate or some shit" I blurt, regret slowly crawling its way into the back of my mind, sitting there, weighing me down. Izuku looks up at me and laughs softly, picking up another big bite of katsudon and shoving it into his mouth. He’s scraping the bowl for what’s left of his food, and I glance down at mine, still half full, and shove it over to his side of the table until it sits beside his bowl. He looks up at me.

“You don’t want it?” He asks, concern and surprise swimming in his eyes. I shake my head and cross my arms across my chest. “I actually had breakfast and lunch. Unlike somebody, ahem, I-zu-ku” Izuku suppresses a smile, feigning ignorance and glancing away. “W-whaaaat? Who?” He says, and I roll my eyes, amusement blossoming in my chest like it’s spring, the butterflies in my stomach drifting up and drinking the flowers’ nectar, mingling and fluttering. Izuku takes my bowl, pushing away his empty one and stuffing a big bite into his mouth. I focus in on the song that had faded into the background, trying to ignore the way he keeps looking up at me.

Don't stop get it, get it

Peep how you captain’s in it

Steady, watch me navigate 

Ha ha ha ha ha~ 

The lyrics continue until they slowly fade out into another song. ‘boulevard of broken dreams’ by Green Day. 

I walk a lonely road

The only one that I have ever known 

Don't know it goes

But it's home to me, and I walk alone 

“Thanks Kacchan. For everything. All of this, letting me in, letting me use your shower, wear your clothes and eat your food… I.. I mean it," Izuku says, flushing and taking another bite of food. I look up, my eyes meeting his, the deep, swirling green drawing me in, pulling me down and into their depths, sucking me down to the deepest parts, leaving me there to drown. He smiles softly, breaking eye contact, and suddenly I’m yanked out of the water, my heart racing uncontrollably, my lungs taking in too much air. I watch as Izuku finishes his last bite of food.

“It's… y’know… s’ whatever…" I mutter, my tone harsher than I intended in an attempt to hide my face to cover the heat that was spreading across my cheeks like spilled ink. I stand up too quickly, my chair screeching backwards and startling Izuku. I grab the two bowls and the spoons, making my way (downtown, walkin’ fast, faces pass and I’m homebound doo doo doo doo doo doo doo) towards the sink, setting them down and flipping on the warm water and squirting some soap onto the scrub brush.

I hear his quiet footsteps coming closer, but I don’t register how much closer until he’s almost up against my back, the heat from his body enveloping me like a heated blanket. He’s too close, yet entirely too far. “I can do those, Kacchan," Izuku whispers next to my ear, his breath fanning across the back of my neck, sending prickly, tingly spiderwebs dancing across my skin. His hand touches my shoulder, and fear tears its way out of the cave it came from in the back of my mind and rips its way through me, down my spine, devouring my state of calmness and my common sense as if they were nothing. It works its way into my muscles, forcing them to lock, making my back go rigid.

“Don't…dont touch me… Izuku,” I say quickly, the sharp, iciness in my voice surprising me. Izuku looks visibly shaken, his face falling along with his hand, dropping down, down, his eyes falling farther and farther from where I want them to be, which is staring directly into my own. With every little step he takes back, his hand, his body is getting farther and farther away from where I want it to be, which is up against my own, skin to skin. Regret is eating away at my resolve, and I throw the bowl I was cleaning down into the bottom of the sink, turning to him. "wait… I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that… Please," I beg, reaching out and grabbing his wrist, tugging him back towards me. I lean back against the counter as I pull his body flush against mine.

 He lets out a soft yelp of surprise, his cheeks flushing as he stares up at me, his jaw slackened and his eyes as wide as a full moon. He swallows, licking his lips and letting out an embarrassed giggle as my eyes follow the movement of his tongue. He glances away, before looking back at me with a sudden confidence I wasn’t expecting. He looks up at me, his eyes narrowing slightly as he looks up at me with a smug, flirty kind of look. Heat instantly floods down my body, shivers following it all the way down to my dick. Fuck.

“You know… Kacchan.. When you act all soft, it’s actually pretty cute…” Izuku laughs, placing a hand on my chest for stability. My stomach flips and my heart races, pumping blood, sending it racing like a stampede of wild horses. My brain isn’t formulating thoughts that can be trusted, so I shut it down and do something idiotic. I reach up, trying my hardest to look annoyed, and ruffle his green hair, pushing him off of me. I shift, reaching for the hand towel and drying my already dry hands on it and holding it over the crotch of my sweatpants casually. Totally, just a causal move.

“W-wait I'm sorry…" Izuku says, still laughing. He walks over, opening the dishwasher to my right and starts loading the bowls onto the racks. I push him out of the way gently, and he stumbles back a couple steps and starts giggling again, and I don’t know if I like his laugh or his moan better. “You’re not sounding the part, ‘Zuku," I say indignantly, placing the last dish into the dishwasher before shutting its door. He quits laughing, and it suddenly feels empty in the room, even with the music still blaring in the background. It’s too quiet now, without his laughter, even though my skeletal system is being rearranged from the vibrations coming from the bass of the damn song. Izuku frowns and pulls out his phone, pausing the music.

I think for a moment. “Wanna watch a movie?" I propose, turning to face Izuku again, “We can use the TV in my room." I put down the hand towel and turn my back to him, casually walking away. I peer over my shoulder at him, looking him in the eyes. I love looking into them. I love being able to turn to him whenever I please and just gaze into them unabashedly, to study every shade of green, every emotion and thought that they have to offer me. I could probably stare for hours on end and never see the same thing twice. He bore so many emotions in his eyes, like they were the index to his heart. I only hope that one day I’ll see my name in that index.

Izuku looks at me and quickly follows me up the stairs. His eyebrows are furrowed, and he’s holding his mouth and thinking hard like he’s a founding father trying to figure out what the fuck gravity is or some shit. His eyes light up, and he looks up at me, his eyes full of excitement and light. “Ooh ooh ooh! Can we watch that old spiderman movie? It's sooo good and I think that's one of my favorites!” Izuku squeaks. He isn’t looking where he’s walking, and misses a step. He wobbles on the top step and starts to fall backwards. Panic rears up inside me, fear showing its ugly face for the second time tonight. My heart leaps up into my throat, choking me as I reach out after him, grabbing him by the forearm before he falls backwards. He stares up at me, his mouth wide open in shock. 

I smirk at him, guiding him up the last 2 stairs, still holding onto his arm lightly, "Sure. We can watch Spiderman," I say. 

Chapter Text

The sound of the TV is blaring, though the crashing of vehicles and shouting images dashing across the screen fade into the background as the drowsiness I’ve been plagued with all day finally slips over me, covering my mind with a soft haze, weighing my body down with thousands of pounds. I don't mind the weight this time. It isn’t a burden, because he’s helping me carry it now. Kacchan. The haze shrouds my thoughts, obscuring me in a fog that’s only behind my closed eyelids. I snuggle against something. It’s something warm, a little hard but soft at the same time and… Nice. A hand runs up and down the small of my back and around to the side of my waist, rubbing in gentle, soothing circles, pulling me tighter against the wonderful something. A soft hum of approval comes from my mysterious pillow, vibrating softly underneath me. I bury myself into its side. His side. 

Kacchan. That's the pillow I'm currently lying beside, my head resting on his shoulder. His bare shoulder. A soft blanket lands across me. I struggle to stay awake a little longer in this perfect moment, but the fog in my mind wins, the thick haze shutting down my brain and engulfing me in darkness, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I wouldn’t change a thing about this moment, because I’m surrounded by him, lying against his side, his warmth and scent covering me up and submerging me. The world is fading away, and the only thing I’m taking into my dreams with me is him. I'm so tired… I’m tired, and I’m safe, and there’s no need to be awake anymore because I’m next to Kacchan. Time for the best nap of my life.

I wake to the sound of Kacchan's rough voice talking to someone over the phone, his voice hushed and quiet. Well, quiet for Kacchan. Which is a decibel short of yelling. I shove away the heaviness of sleep the best I can and attempt to listen in on what he’s saying.

“Fine… I'll invite the nerd to the party, but only because your dumb ass won't stop bothering me if I don't,” Kacchan whispers angrily at the person on the other side of the call. He quickly glances over to me, his eyes softening as we make eye contact. He glances away and begins talking again, “yeah, yeah I get it… I'm hanging up now,” Kacchan says with an eye roll as he shifts his phone into his other hand and presses the button to hang up the call.

“Izuku… Did I wake you?” he asks, his tone surprisingly light and gentle, laced with concern. His voice is like a drug, addicting and always laced with something I’d never expect. I crave to hear it, and when I do, I can never get enough. But it’s like that with every part of him. Every last inch of him is addicting. He’s my drug. But he’s not your boyfriend. He doesn’t see you like that… whispers that sadistic, annoying part of my brain. I roll my eyes internally and begin to sit up, pushing my body weight up with the palms of my hands. The blanket that was covering me pools at my waist. I’m not going to tell Kacchan that he woke me up considering I have no idea how he’ll react. He’s acting weird. He’s less angry and he’s not looking at me the same. I feel like he’ll blame himself if I say yes… so…

“No you didn't, um… What time is it?" I ask, stretching my arms out above me and yawning. I feel the muscles in my back tighten as I stretch and let out a satisfied sigh. I drop my arms back down, staring at my hands as Kacchan walks toward me until he's standing directly in front of where I'm sitting. My cheeks light ablaze, burning like a volcano about to erupt at the position that I'm sure he’s not thinking about. I try with all the strength I try to be as oblivious as him, to ignore the way he’s standing across from me, but I can't stop myself. My eyes have a mind of their own, trailing up his body, his waist, the sweatpants he's wearing low on his hips, his tank top, which has put his annoyingly well defined biceps on full display, and finally up to his face. His gorgeous face. There’s no way the man standing over me is real. There’s no way he’d ever love you… hisses the part of my brain I can’t ever seem to shut up. 

He stares down at me, confusion tainting his eyes for a moment before turning on the phone in his hand, shoving the screen so close to my face I have to move back and squint my eyes at the ungodly brightness of it. The little clock centered near the top says 11:30 pm. Panic erupts in the back of my mind and parades down through my body. I need to text my mom and see if she’s home, and I need to leave here, to go to my own house, my own bed… I probably should. Probably.

But I’m not going to.

“You can stay tonight… I-I mean… if you want to…” Katsuki says, glancing away and rubbing the back of his neck. His bicep flexes, and I swallow hard, trying to choke down whatever non-existent thing that’s there, making it hard for me to breathe. He looks back down at me, his crimson red eyes piercing me with their bold, intense emotion. His eyes are always full of emotions, so many different feelings laid out for me to see in his eyes, such intensity that I could get lost in and not mind one bit. I’m lost in thought, trying to find my way back out of the tangled mess of them, but all I can do is just stare at him in silence. He startles me when he’s suddenly reaching down, grabbing my chin and tilting my head up so I have no choice but to stare directly into his blood red eyes. "Izuku, baby, you feelin’ okay? You're offly quiet…” he says, making my stomach flip. He called me baby again.

“I'm fine! I promise. J-just a bit lost in thought… let me text my mom about staying over,” I say, feeling around me on the couch for my phone, but I can’t find it. "...where’s my phone?” I watch as Kacchan reaches into his pocket, pulling out my phone and wallet, leaning down to hand it to me. I reach out and take it from his hand, his fingers brushing against mine, sending a tidal wave of shivers cascading down my spine like a waterfall, a thick warmness sliding up my spine and resting on the back of my neck, clinging to my ears and cheeks. I mutter a quick thanks, quickly pulling my chin out of his hands and looking down at my phone, thankful for the excuse to look away from his eyes. I open the messages app and text my mom that I'll be staying a night or two with a friend and will be back. 

I look back up at Kacchan, giving him a soft smile. He’s still staring down at me, his crimson eyes full of something that I can’t quite place. He rolls his eyes playfully and scoffs, ruffling my hair. He turns and sits down on the couch, his arm reaching around me and landing across my shoulders. He swallows, and I look over at him. His eyes are full of an emotion I’ve never seen on him before. He looks nervous and I have no idea why. He’s always confident in everything he does. What reason does he have to be nervous? He looks over at me, giving me a hesitant smile. 

“So… Mina invited us to this party… if you want to go with me…?" Kacchan asks, his fingers playing with my shirt sleeve absentmindedly. My stomach flips around and my heart flutters, pounding faster than a race horse’s hooves. “There's going to be alcohol and shit but.." He continues. I stare at him, trying to gauge his expression. It’s always hard to tell if he’s being serious or not. Especially when he suggests something like this. Kacchan is asking me to go somewhere with him. Not somewhere. A party. Kacchan? Who the heck would say no to an offer like that? Not me. 

“Sounds fun! I mean…So, um… when is it?" I ask, trying to slow down my heart, but Kacchan technically just asked me out. Right? That’s like him asking me out, isn’t it? What if he isn’t asking me out and he’s being nice to me just to humiliate me in front of everybody? What if what happened with Monoma happens again with Kacchan? I bite my lip, chewing on it as I look up at him. My nerves are eating me from the inside out, but the second our eyes meet they melt away, the look of vulnerability in his eyes reaching out, repairing the damage that my nerves just did a moment ago.

“It's tomorrow, at Mina's house. It starts at like… um… I think she said nine… so if you wanna go… even if you don’t wanna go with me… I'll drive you there," Katsuki mumbles quietly, pressing his hands together, fidgeting. He pulls his hands apart and leans forwards, picking up the TV remote. I watch his hands as he searches through the channels, watching his grip on the remote change and his fingers slide down and click the select button. I look at the TV, at the big red letters that say Netflix. I swallow, trying to ignore the way such little actions from him turn me on. I wish he liked me as much as I liked him. I lean into Kacchan’s side, relishing in the warmth that radiated off of him.  

“That’s so nice! Of course I want to go with you!” I squeak excitement bubbling up inside the center of my chest. I’m going to a party! With Kacchan! I guess I’m too close or something, because his ears turn a soft pink, and he turns his face away from mine. I look at him, and let out a sigh as I watch him click on a random show. I’ve never heard of it before. I glance at my phone. It’s only 11:45… we came up here at like 8 o’clock! I slept for 4 and a half hours? Guilt seizes me, and I look over at Kacchan. “Sorry I fell asleep earlier.. I guess I was more tired than I realized. I wanted to stay up and talk to you some more but…" I apologize quietly, the words spilling out of my mouth before I can stop them. Kacchan scoffs and reaches over, pressing a finger over my mouth, looking down at me with his crimson eyes. 

“I could tell nerd," he laughs and turns his attention away from the TV, focusing solely on me, moving his hand off my lips to brush one of my curls from my face. His red eyes soften, and our eyes meet again. My chest tightens and my heart flutters, making my cheeks heat up, and his cheeks turn slightly red too. I want to just sit here in silence and look at him, tell him everything, how I feel, how his touch makes me feel, how I could just sit and stare into his eyes and never ever get bored. I want to touch him. I walk to stay close to him, to sit, curled in his arms, and stay like that. But I can’t. I'm not worthy of him, and I never will be. 

Movement breaks me out of my thoughts as I feel a finger under my chin, moving my face up so that I'm looking directly into Kacchan’s eyes. My heart flutters as I look up into them, so full of raw, complex emotion that it makes my heart ache in awe as I stare up at him. 

“Izuku… Why are you dating Ochako?” Kacchan asks, his tone mildly annoyed. He pulls me out of my thoughts, and I stare up at him. I open my mouth, close it again, hesitation eating away at my insides. All I want to do is say that I'm not and I never have been dating Ochako. I want to kiss him and tell him that it’s all a big lie meant to make him jealous, but if he finds out that I’m lying, he might get mad at me and never talk to me again. I need to continue the plan. 

I think, trying to think of something believable, and quickly. “Well uh… She's… she’s pretty," I cringe internally at the words beginning to flow from my mouth,"and nice, and.. Well, she’s uh…” I look away trying to hide the fact I'm lying. I've been told I'm a horrible liar. 

“If that's all she has going for her, I don't know if y'all should be dating. I mean if all you have to say is that she is pretty and nice, Zuku… Baby, your standards are horribly low,” Kacchan says, his fingers shifting on my chin as he leans closer to me. I feel heat blossoming up my neck, a blush spreading its petals across my cheeks like flowers. My stomach is flipping and I feel like there are bees inside of me, trying to drink the nectar from the pink on my face.

I try to pull myself together, forcing my expression into one that I hope mirrors his annoyance. “I don’t see how my love life is any of your concern” I say back, looking him in the eyes with unbacked confidence. He’s meaning closer, and suddenly my back is hitting the seat cushion and Kacchan is above me, his arms on either side of my head, caging me in. His knees are planted on either side of my thighs. I stare up at him, trying to find myself, but he’s snuffing out any confidence I manage to muster and scattering my thoughts like the beads of a broken bracelet, so all I’m capable of right now is staring. Staring up at his gorgeous face as a smirk spreads across it.

“Izuku, I think of you as a friend, Okay? So that means you should fucking listen to my opinions. You’re way too good for pink cheeks…" He whispers, leaning in closer to my face until he's right next to my ear. "You're too pretty for her. Absolutely fucking unmatched in that department, S’ almost unfair for her. You’re fucking beautiful…”

The bees are buzzing again, harder this time, fighting desperately against my skin to get out, and butterflies are mingling with the bees in my stomach. It’s too hot in this stupid room, because my palms are sweaty and I can feel the redness on my face growing darker with every passing second. He called me pretty? Beautiful? “I am…?” I ask, no one has ever told me that. 

I watch as he leans back a few inches, still close enough to feel his breath dancing across my cheeks. “Hell yes…" he whispers softly. I look up at him, thoroughly silenced. He swallows, and I watch as his eyes flicker down my face to my mouth, still wide open in shock. He closes his eyes. “W-we should… Um, we should go to bed," Kacchan mumbles quickly, basically jumping off of me and walking away, leaving me alone in the room that’s dropped a few hundred degrees with the absence of his radiating heat. Confusion lurks in the darkness of my mind. What did I do to make him want to suddenly leave?

“I-i guess…?" I stumble over my words, sitting back up and watching as he steps into the bathroom, and closes the door behind him. My phone buzzes in my pocket; A text message from my mom. I quickly read through the message, responding with a quick thank you and I love you before shoving my phone into the pocket of the borrowed pair of sweatpants I still have on. 

Kacchan walks out of the bathroom, his eyes scanning the room before his eyes find me. My heart flutters when he looks at me, and I feel myself starting to get flustered, so I stand up from the couch and make my way over to him, keeping my head hung so he doesn’t see my face. I stop in front of him, my palms sweating, my heart drumming relentlessly against my ribcage. I can’t bring myself to muster up the courage to look him in the eyes, so I look at my feet instead. The room is closing in on me, my anxiety whispering angrily in my ear, telling me what all could go wrong right now, but I ignore it, throwing my arms around him, pulling him into a hug. His body tenses, and my anxiety spikes again at his reluctance to hug back, but it eases when his hands land on my lower back, rubbing softly up and down my spine. 

“I know I've said it a lot today," I begin, “But seriously, thank you. I'd probably be in the back of a random van or something by now…" I cringe into his chest, and Kacchan relaxes as a quiet laugh comes from him and I feel my inside tingle and buzz like there are fireworks exploding in my stomach and bubbles popping in my chest. He leans down, resting his forehead on the top of my head.

I draw in a deep breath, taking in the smell of him, the smoky scent enveloping me. I relax, and Kacchan pulls back to look down at me. “We can both sleep in my bed. Trust me, the couch is not comfortable to sleep on,” Kacchan says with a sigh. His hands come to a stop on my back, resting on my hips. I feel myself flush as his fingers rub small circles on my hips. This seems rather intimate, but that doesn’t mean I'm gonna stop him. 

“You sound like you’re talking from personal experience, Kacchan, " I laugh, trying to keep my tone casual when I’m feeling anything but right now. “So… same bed, huh? Are we gonna stay up a little more?”

“I’m fucking not. It's late and I'm not staying up for your ass," Kacchan says, pulling away from me and walking over to the side of his bed, which is abnormally large. He reaches over his head and slides off his tank top, revealing the most breathtaking body I’ve ever seen. I try not to stare, but holy mother of Moses, he has an 8 pack. He’s toned and muscular, every line a man could possibly have is visible but he isn’t bulky. He’s lean, and… and perfect. I don’t think he’d be able to tell me what fat is if I asked him. He starts to look back at me, and I tear my eyes away as fast as I can from the man in front of me, hoping that he didn’t see me staring.

Kacchan crawls into his obese bed, pulling the covers over his half naked body. I walk around the bed, following his lead and clamboring up into the bed beside him, nowhere near as gracefully. I flush when I flop down into the bed beside him. I’m sitting in Kacchan’s bed, in Kacchan’s clothes, next to Kacchan, who is currently shirtless. Izuku, you’ve really outdone yourself this time. You’re an absolute idiot. I look over, blinking in confusion as he starts piling some blankets up in between us for a reason I couldn’t tell you. “What are you doing?" I whisper. 

“Lpm. I don't want you over here in my space while I'm trying to sleep," he mutters back in a hushed voice, his brow furrowed as finishing his blanket fortress. I stare at him as he turns his unreasonably attractive back to me, and flops down. What he said repeats over and over in my head, my confusion and curiosity working away at it. What is lpm? What does it have to do with blankets? Have I heard it before? I try to figure it out, but I keep blanking.

“What… What is that?” I ask hesitantly, my embarrassment increasing when I hear a groan come from him. 

“Lesbian prevention method. Now shut up and go to sleep. It's already too late, I’m tired, and I should’ve been asleep at 9, which was 3 fucking hours ago,” he groans, before fixing the blanket around him and going quiet. I sink down into the bed, my chest tight. I didn’t want him to yell at me… I was just curious. I pull the blankets over my head, covering myself entirely. I already know I’ll never fall asleep tonight because I just woke up 30 minutes ago. 

It's been a whopping hour and I have yet to fall asleep. I should’ve just gone to bed at 9 instead of watching that movie with Kacchan. Now I can't seem to even fathom the idea of sleep, my brain buzzing with random thoughts, 3 different songs and the man asleep a foot away from me. I let out a quiet sigh, looking up at the ceiling. Boredom is eating away at me, and if I don’t do something, I might just die, so before I can overthink this, my legs are throwing themselves gently off the side of the bed and I’m walking, searching through his bookshelf. My eyes land on a sort of year book looking thing. I grab the top of the book, sliding it out from the bookshelf. The other books fall into the vacant spot as I slip the book the rest way out. 

The front of the book cover says 2023-2024 school year UA highschool. Curiosity plants it’s roots in the back of my mind, taking over and ordering my hands and opening the yearbook. This was his 11th grade year… last year? Wasn’t Cami at this school last year? The thought of Cami fuels me to open the yearbook and flip through the pages of cheerleaders and funny moments, until I see the 11th grade section and begin to search for Kacchan and Cami's names. I find Kacchan’s picture first. Though he's not smiling, he still somehow looks absolutely flawless. I continue to flip through the pages until I find Cami's picture. I blink at the picture before me, of the gorgeous blonde with bright, soulful brown eyes, so much light in her smile it’s hard to believe she dated Kacchan. If this is Kacchans type, then I have absolutely no chance whatsoever. 

I sigh and close the yearbook, placing it back on the shelf, aligning the books back into their original places and begin to search for another book to cure my curiosity, and yet I don’t know a single one of these books, let alone anything eye-catching enough to be reading at 1 in the morning. I keep looking, eyes roaming over the hundreds of books on the many, many shelves, until a dark black book with shiny, reflective red details catches my eyes. I pull it off the shelf, inspecting the cover. ‘A Chain Stained Crimson,’ by… Nemuri Kayama? Looks interesting enough… I get on my knees and flip to a random page. I scan the page, unimpressed. I roll my eyes and start to close the book, when I see a word that catches my attention. Baby. I open the book again, completely invested now, starting to read through the book.

Xavier pulls on the chains, stretching my arms out farther above my head and pushing his hardness against my stomach. I whimper softly at the feeling of his size, sharp tingles erupting through my body as he licks up my neck at an agonizingly slow pace, before biting down hard enough to draw blood. I let out a sharp cry as pain shoots through me. I get cut off by 2 fingers sliding into my mouth, gagging me and muffling the soft sounds my whimpers and moans. His fingers taste like iron, or a wet, rusted piece of metal. Like straight blood. 

His knee pushes up into my pussy, drawing out a soft moan from my throat. He slowly removes his fingers from my mouth, his hands sliding down my bare sides, over my hips and towards my thong. He drags his tongue down my body, trailing a long stripe of wet and sticky saliva down my stomach and onto my upper thigh. His fingers sketch a tale of dark, unknown desires on the pale skin of my hips, dancing around the small strip of fabric of my thong, threatening to show me what they want.

“fuck, your absolutely dripping, baby… I love it when you’re like this… so fucking wet for me… you slut…” Xavier growls, using his fingers to slide my thong over, his eyes practically eating me out on their own. “Get on your hands and knees, now…” he orders, and I quickly follow his command, turning over and pushing myself up onto my knees and then my hands. The chains attached to my wrists clank and jingle. His thick fingers spread my lips open, and his tongue circling around the rim of my spasming vagina. My breath hitches as I slowly try to get used to such a foreign feeling. As soon as I do, his tongue starts sliding in and out slowly, drawing long and loud moans from deep inside of me. He removes his tongue, sucking on my hole with just enough pressure to make me want to cum, before thrusting his tongue back in and fucking me slowly with it. 

I slam the book shut, practically hyperventilating. Shock and lust blossoms in the center of my chest. I glance around me, feeling guilt creeping around, lurking in the shadows. WHAT. Was that? What did I just read? I glance down at the book in my hands and swallow. I open it again. 

His tongue slowly slides out, being replaced with his fingers. He eases two of them in slowly, curling them to hit that certain spot inside me. I cry out and he begins to thrust harder into me, again and again until I'm seeing stars. I gasp, clinging to the chains as I feel myself climbing, that itch deep in my core, scratching desperately to be released, like a wild beast.

“P~please I'm going to c~cum, a~ah! P~please,” I plead, my thighs shaking at the pleasure coursing through my body and into my brain, dying the void of greed into a lust filled crimson tide. His fingers slide out and I lose the orgasm, anger and disappointment coursing through me. I try to turn around and look back to see why he stopped, but he pulls out his cock, slapping me in the face with it. “Be patient…” he snaps as he strokes his cock a few times before teasing the opening of my hole with it. 

“Or don’t… you sound better when you beg, Ameilia~” he hisses, low and cold, before thrusting in fully. I scream at the pain and pleasure coursing through me, my eyes rolling to the back of my head and my jaw dropping. He continues thrusting in and out at an ungodly, merciless pace, my orgasm beginning to build again, like a dam ready to burst. My thighs shake violently, and my arms begin to feel weak. Loud moans and whimpers come from me, and he only thrust into me harder. Lewd noises, skin on skin smacking sounds ring throughout the dungeon. He leans down, biting into the side of my shoulder, blood trickling down from the bite, painting the cold, stone floor below me crimson. 

“What are you doing?" I jump, fear making goosebumps erupt across my arms. I slam the book shut and throw it down in front of me, hanging my head. I can’t bring myself to look at where I know he’s standing right behind me. 

“Uh… Nothing…" I mumble pathetically, finally looking up from my lap."just trying to loo-” my eyes land on him, and I feel all the air in my lungs vacate, leaving me a gasping, choking, spluttering mess. His sweatpants are hanging lower than before, his torso still bare and in full view, the darkness casting soft shadows across his body in all the right places. My eyes drift lower down, and allowing them to is my first mistake. It's now been brought to my attention that he's not wearing boxers under his sweatpants, and that he’s damn big. I feel my mouth hanging open, trying to wrap my mind around the fact that that's just the outline. 

“You done?" Kacchan deadpans, and I can feel him looking down at me. I swallow, forcing my eyes to move up to his face and meet his. He looks down at me with an amused glint in his red eyes, taking a small step closer. “The hell are you reading?” he asks, his voice amused, yet still tainted with the raspy edge of sleepiness. He squats down, taking the book from in front of me before I can stop him.

He studies the cover of the book in his hands and raises an eyebrow. “A Chain Stained Crimson? So you’re a freak, huh? Izuku Midoriya is a fuckin’ freak~” Kacchan starts laughing, falling back to sit next to me on the floor, holding his stomach as he laughs harder. I feel myself flush in embarrassment as he keeps laughing at me, but I can’t help the way his laughter makes my stomach twist and my heart soar, the only thing keeping it up is a symphony of emotions I can’t begin to describe or pick out. I don’t know if I should feel flustered or embarrassed, or maybe angry. All I can do is watch him laugh, spluttering for a response.

“I-it's not…" my face flushes even more as I try to push out an excuse, “I-I was just… Looking through the book I didn't know that-” my words die off as Kacchan’s laughter finally subdues and he’s pushing himself up off the ground and standing above me again, looking down at me, amusement still plain as day in his crimson eyes. He holds out a hand to help me up off the floor, and I reach out and take it, letting him pull me up. I can't help the blush that's still present on my face from darkening. 

“Didn't take you as the type to read smut, Izuku. Guess you learn something new everyday, hmm?" he asks with a smirk. I pull my hand out of his and walk away, trying to mask my embarrassment with anger. I flop back down into the bed, pulling the covers up and over (UP UP AND AWAY) my face, trying to cover the utter embarrassment that paints my face. I feel the bed shift, and the blanket is getting peeled out of my grip before I can grasp what’s happening. Kacchan’s leaning over me, a smirk still on his face. “No need to get so bent out of shape over some teasing, nerd,” He says. 

Kacchan lets go of the blanket and rolls onto his back, putting only a sliver of distance between us. I push myself up, allowing my weight to sit on the palms of my hands and cross my legs. He lets out a loud and obviously annoyed sigh before sitting up himself. “Guess sleep isn’t an option, hmm?” he mutters sarcastically. I roll my eyes, “My bad… I didn't mean to fall asleep earlier…" I grumble, “I just had a very nice pillow to lean against while we were watching the movie." 

“Mmh~ really?"

“Mhm…" I mumble, nodding slowly. 

 “Well, we might as well do something," Kacchan says, looking over at me. We look at each other for a long moment, the silence drawing out, the absence of almost all noise making my heart race as we stare at each other in thought.

 “How about a game of 20 questions?” He asks