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“Where'd  Loki run off to?” Stark called from the stairway of the tower. He had been searching for the god for nearly an hour, excited to cash in the promise of magical assistance in his latest engineering project. It grimly crossed his mind that Loki was just avoiding him in an effort to get out of working together- no, surely that isn't the case. They both had been enthusiastic of this opportunity to mix midgardian technology with ethereal seidr. Tony shakes his head, turning to Natasha and Steve for clues. Both shrugged, then nodded towards the blonde god of thunder on the couch, who seemed rather engrossed in a car catalog. “Hey Point Break, where's your wife?”Thor doesn't look up from the waxy paper, his pinching between the calloused side of his pointer finger and his thumb. Failing to seem nonchalant, he then hums absentmindedly and clears his throat. “My queen had to leave this realm for a while. He shall return promptly.”

“Well how long would you consider promptly, exactly, because aren't you like thousands of years old?” Tony asked, raising an eyebrow in skepticism. He climbed the last few steps and rounded the corner to the railing, crossing the open-concept living space to stand before Thor. Steve tossed him a hand towel from the kitchen, which he took with a nod of gratitude to wipe the crude oil from between his fingers.

“As promptly as he needs it to be. Perhaps he shall be back in a fortnight. Perhaps it shall take a decade. Ask no more questions, man of iron.” Thor gritted. He sounded tense, although Tony could gather that much by how the magazine ripped and singed at the points of contact with his skin.

“A- a decade?” Tony parroted. The rest of the Avengers present were equally shocked by this sudden announcement, they had all just seen Loki at dinner after all, as they gathered closer to the couch. The thunderbringer’s shoulders hiked up defensively. “Did you piss him off? Was there a big fight or something?”

That drew his eyes off of the printed text, melancholic exhaustion to them like nothing the rest of the heroes had ever seen. “No, no, I did nothing of the sort, Loki has just-” Thor caught himself speaking and bit his tongue. “My beloved has asked me to not speak of where he has gone or the reason for his absence. Just know that this is far from the first time this has happened, so he has it completely under control.”

“Is he doing that self-sacrificing thing where he runs off to some distant planet to defeat a tyrannical warmonger without any backup?” Natasha frowns, cracking her back with a twist, gearing up to track Loki down and scruff him. “I thought I finally convinced him that he could trust us with that sort of thing.”

“No, he's not- well, perhaps he is, actually, but I am not entirely sure-” Thor frustratedly huffs, running his hands through his long hair. Tony sat down beside him, patting his shoulder. Thor was on edge, tearing up; it was all uncharted territory. One thing was undeniable- only Loki could make him feel this vulnerable. “I despise the times he must leave. Why won't he trust me to go with him- to keep him safe or at least provide company.”

Tony only grew more nervous as the details grew to be more vague. “So he is in danger? Come on big guy, we won't think less of either of you no matter what's really going on. Hell, I think Loki could stab me and I wouldn't be mad. That guy has literally stopped three world wars from breaking out.”

Thor lets out a breathy chuckle through the sniffles and sharp inhales. “I am glad you think so highly of my queen,” he smiles, wiping the moisture from the rim of his eyes with the base of his hand. There was a lapse of silence Tony, Steve, and Natasha respected; it was the kind of stillness that preceded a storm. “He… he has these fits of mania. Sometimes he hurts people or hurts himself, so he goes someplace far away to do- well, I do not know, really. I presume he binds his magic, or at least half of it, so he can not return till the delirium passes.”

Natasha hummed. She had been expecting far worse, since Loki seemed so perfect from the very start. Everyone has their flaws, after all. “So this is where the whole God of Mischief title comes from? I've been wondering about that. Given how rational Loki is, chaos didn't seem too fitting... How long has he been having these episodes?” She sat on the coffee table, to which Steve let out a disproving sigh.

“Hard to say, since they keep getting longer. The earliest ones could have been an hour long and started when we were just a few centuries old.” Thor looked into the distance, old memories making his eyes hazy. “I only truly noticed after he told me of his condition on the night I proposed. I think he was trying to talk me out of it by bringing his image down, as if I could possibly see him as anything other than divine.”

The billionaire lets out a wistful noise as he stands, hands on his knees acting as leverage. “Usually when a person goes through frequent psychotic episodes, it stems from some kind of root event, but we can dive into all of that once Loki's back, I guess. Right now let's get you a pint of ice cream and some cheesy romance films. I feel like you'd really relate to Red, White, and Royal Blue.”

“Is that a patriotic picture show?” Steve pipped obliviously. “I'll get some hooch.”

—--

Loki did not make an appearance for many days. Then those days turned into a week. Then two weeks. Everyone feared it would bleed into a month, to the point Tony was devising a plan to track down the lost god by meeting up with an eclectic interdimensional doctor. It was just after that thought was vocalized that a shimmer of green and gold seidr revealed their lost teammate had returned.

“I'm just saying, Doctor Strange can locate him, then we can peek in, see if he's alright, and-”

“Who's missing?” A tired voice came from a few meters away, a certain depressing pinch to the frequency. Heads turned swiftly to the new presence, their eyes falling upon a pristine, beautifully maintained God. His eyes were a shimmering emerald, holding back not an ounce of vitality. Not a hair was out of place, and not a wrinkle befell on his clothing.

‘Too perfect,’ Thor thought with a grimace. ‘Entirely too perfect, even for him.’

“Apologies for my absence, I needed to take care of something.” Loki looked around the room, but never at any of the other Avengers' faces. Christ, he sounded like he was in pain, his throat grating out each word like it burned. “Now that I am back, I can lend my magic to locate this individual. Do you have a photograph of them or-”

“Drop the illusion, my love.” Thor muttered, advancing towards his lover. He placed a hand on Loki's cheek, feeling how the skin burned far too hot for the frost giant. “You try to tell lies through your appearance, yet your voice is unchangeable. You must be too weak to mask it all. It’s alright, you can let yourself rest, darling.”

“Thor, I don't-” Loki takes a step away, creating distance between them. Thor immediately felt an ache in his gut as his hand grew cold, the impersonal use of his name seering into his mind. Green eyes flicked over the other, his friends and fellow heroes, a crestfallen expression taking over his features. “You told them.” He gasped, piecing together the looks of pity.

The thunderbringer helplessly took another step forward only for Loki to back away again. “I was worried. It's been so long since you last had to go and I- I think they can help put an end to this damaged side of you. You can take off the glamor in their presence. The Avengers shant shun you.”

Being addressed as if they weren't there made the others grow stiff. Tony had a lot to say (when did he not) but opted to let the couple deal with this first before explaining the human parameters for psychosis. Bruce, who had been recently filled in, shuffled from foot to foot on the other side of the island. He also understood psychology greatly, having a bachelor's in the topic and all, yet that's not where his contributions to Loki's predicament ended.

Bruce rounded the marble tabletop, making his presence known to the gods. “I also have a side to me I'd rather hide, I get it, but it was only through explaining it to others that I learned how it worked and how to control it.” He smiled meekly, feeling a little intimidated by Loki's heavenly, untouchable demeanor.

It was hard not to bow to him, even if his energy was kind and sweet like spring. The sight of him was all black curls like spilled ink down to his tailbone and elegant silk and gold jewelry and the softest pale flesh. Perhaps it was just his beauty, then, that made a person want to drop to their knees and swear allegiance, or maybe it was due to his status as the queen of an entire realm. That must translate over into the air he possessed about himself, even if just by a little. It didn't feel right for the mortal men to point out a crack in the perfect pottery, even if it was necessary.

“I- I do not wish to discuss this now, as I admittedly need bed rest. I shall give it thought, although I am mostly certain that your help is not required.” Loki addresses his comrades, giving them a cold look that they had never had the displeasure of receiving before. “I know exactly why I am the way that I am. My personal matters are just that, my own, and I expect you all to respect my wishes for it to stay that way.”

“My love, I don't think it is wise to-” Thor's words were cut short.

“I am going to Asgard for some recuperation and leisurely delegation. I advise you to make an appearance soon, lest your people forget the face of their king.” Then with a shimmer of green and gold, Loki disappeared just as suddenly as he arrived.

“Well, that wasn't a hit on all sixes; he seemed like the regular pip; ain't that swell enough?” Steve says after a beat of awkward stillness. Clint, who had been keeping quiet in the corner of the kitchen during the entire ordeal, gave in a loud pleading groan for Cap to ‘give us modern terms’. The soldier clears his throat and tries again. “It could have gone better, but it seems like he was doing fine, dressed to the nines and all.”

“It was an illusion. Underneath it all he is tired, bruised and feverish. I need to get to him and create a light rain over the kingdom to cool it. The hot season of Asgard will treat him brutally otherwise.” Thor gruff, stalking his way to the stairs, presumably to access the roof and thus Heimdall’s channel to the skies.

Stark followed, because of course he could not just let it be as it were. He considered Loki his best companion, not to pick favorites, although it was hard to feel guilty about that when everyone would claim the ebony God to be their favorite person. Just as his aura commanded respect, his soul emitted a comforting light that drew people in like moths to a flame. It was impossible to not adore his gentleness, as well as the vigor that accompanied it. It was likewise impossible to not grow jealous of Thor, at least to some degree, for being the one closest to that alluring light.

“You know I've always wanted to see Asgard. The Norwegian picture books are doing absolutely no justice in my head. I'd love to see the lands that pumped out the two most objectively attractive beings ever lifted to mankind.” Tony took double the steps as Thor to catch up to him, leaving the rest of his team in the kitchen. They all seemed a bit more hesitant to follow their friend into a beam of searing, extraterrestrial space light.

“My beloved is not from Asgard, he is from Jotunheim. You were previously aware of this,  man of iron.” The blonde man glazed down at the other, unbothered, standing in the middle of the helicopter landing zone. “I care not if you come to see the sights. It will be lovely for Loki to have a friend in which to confide. Is lady Pepper in need of informing before we depart?”

“Nah, Friday sent her a notification that I'd be off-planet on a vay-cay.”

Tony's skin was sizzling before he knew it, the bifrost nipping at his goosebumps playfully. The others were left behind in the tower with the hope that the pair would smooth things over with Loki, and perhaps find out more on his condition while they were at it. Conversation will surely be more difficult without Tony's extroverted nature or Loki's general ability to act as a social glue. For now they shall wait, glancing to the heavens in a silent prayer.