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Chapter Text

Jasnah closed her eyes and clenched her fists around Ivory’s hilt. Nothing else to do now, make it quick. Make it painless.
Which was utter nonsense, so long as she hit the brain or the neck it would be instant.
Raising the blade high above her herself, she drove it home.

For a second Jasnah was entirely still, breath catching in her throat, then his body slumped into her legs.
He wasn’t heavy, but still she stumbled from it. Ivory turned to mist beside her, arranging himself on her shoulder.
“He was. However his body still is. Jasnah-“
“I know. I know.” She held Renarin’s limp shoulders and placed him face-up against the temple floor. Her hands shook as she took his. “I’m sorry, cousin.”
Stormlight flowed from her open safepouch like a river, then down again into the body. Fire.

Smoke would’ve been easier. Safer, more efficient too. But the least she could do was offer some semblance of a funeral.
It was done in an instant, his tear-stained cheeks and hollow eyes vanishing into the blaze. Whatever memories had touched her a minute ago had to wait. She could not regret this, just as she could not undo it.

Using her freehand to steady herself, Jasnah rose. Move, now. Get it together.
She didn’t look back at the quieting flames, and through some force of will her hands stopped shaking. Her face set itself into neutrality. It was done, now. Nothing would ever change that.

Chapter Text

It was a few hours before anyone noticed. It was Adolin, of course.
“He’ll turn up, son,” Dalinar had assured. “He’s radiant. Do not fret.”
This did little to calm the man, but it restrained him. Shallan distracted him in possibly the least subtle of ways. Really.

Jasnah busied herself with reports. What had happened where, which districts were the most damaged. A large area near the temple of Shalash had been decimated by a Thunderclast. It was mainly along the northern edge of the Royal ward, which was problematic but not a major residential space. She spent some time with her mother, scheduling future meetings with Queen Fen about aid and supplies. Obviously they would be provided, but what and where had to be figured out.

All the while, Renarin’s hollow eyes clung to the recesses of her mind. They were often replaced by the watery sapphire she remembered, spilling themselves on her silk skirts as she sat quietly.

Whenever these images lingered too long, she set herself to a new task. Organising, recuperating, rebuilding. There was much demand for a soulcaster now, more than ever before. For the next few days she split her time between this work and study. What had gone wrong, how? It was easy to decipher where they had been betrayed- but finding the root of that betrayal was essential. They had to prevent the misuse of Oathgates however possible.

By then, Renarin’s absence was becoming harder to ignore. Not just from a personal standpoint within the family, but also tactically. He was one of few radiants who could provide healing- and therefore should be invaluable. She had considered this beforehand, yet- how much could one trust healings given by Odium’s hand? She was still unsure exactly how much her cousin had been really alive, how much was the puppet of their enemy. Had he been conscious of the change? Would it have been painful? If so, perhaps her actions were a mercy. The weeping she had heard still crawled in her ears.

There was a search of course. Jasnah even participated, sending a few people across Thaylen City. It would be the least suspicious thing she could do.
To no avail, naturally. A few civilians had seen him throughout the early battle, but none of them were paying much attention to where he was going or what exactly he was doing. And even if they had noticed, it wasn’t like there was a body to find.

It wasn’t her intention to hide forever, especially after Adolin came clean about Sadeas. Secrets like this would come out eventually, and she was better to act on her own terms. Not yet, but she began thinking on what to say.

At the beginning of the second week, every available radiant was asked to meet. There was some talk of logistics, but mostly it served to show how quick their numbers were growing.
After outlining her thoughts on Stormlight rationing in the coming months, Jasnah stepped back. She had been waiting for Dalinar, wanting to further discuss, but he was quick to leave the room. Adolin pointedly took a different exit, which told her everything.

“Are we sure this was a good idea?”
She pivoted. The Windrunner, Stormblessed, was leaning on his spear. His dark hair was tied back loosely but much of it still hung about his face, and he kept rubbing at his eyes.
When she didn’t respond, he went on.

“I just mean, after all this with that Dustbringer, Malata, how can we trust these people?” The chamber was still emptying, but he turned his gaze onto the crowd regardless. “Them being radiants doesn’t really cut it anymore- right?”
She sighed. “I don’t know why you’re bringing this to me, Stormblessed. In times such as these, we might just have to accept that risk.” She followed his line of sight to a cluster of retreating new lightweavers. “Let us hope that Malata was a one-off occurrence.”

He shifted his grip around his weapon. “I know we’ve… disagreed. But I hear you care about protecting your people and I can see it for myself. My men were hurt, killed, because we trusted someone just for being radiant. You know I can’t let that happen again.” Jasnah sighed, and nodded. He was right, if perhaps oversimplifying things. This was an issue they’d have to resolve. “I mean, even if someone swears the oaths- that doesn’t make them good, right?”
Sobs muffled by a bedroom door, incense burning freely from an open window.
“Of course, Captain. You’re right.” She straightened the hem of her havah, then tucked stray hairs back. “We’ll have to be more careful now. I’m sorry your men suffered for our naïveté.”
This solicited a grunt, which seemed to end their conversation.

Soon she was alone, and she stood a little taller. For once, Kaladin had been correct. It had to be done, so harm wouldn’t come to others.
This was right, it would be right.
As she left the room herself, the smell of smoke lingered.