Archive of Our Own ^beta

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He couldn’t remember the last time they’d been this comfortable and familiar with each other. He was loath to admit that he’d missed it. This feeling when he and Liam were just in sync and it felt like they were in each other's heads, and despite the fact they hadn’t spoken face to face for years now, he was still able to read his little brother as easily as when they were children. 

The house was empty now, gone were the sound of their kids laughing and talking each other's ears off, playing catch up whilst he and Liam sat and did the same of sorts. Not exactly a heart to heart but it was a start. The beers had come out at some point, probably when the kids had left, and now they were god knows how many beers down, the football was on the telly and they were slumped in Liam’s ridiculously comfortable sofa. 

“Fuckin’ useless cunts.” Liam tutted at the TV before finishing the last of his beer. Noel made a grunt of agreement, he was barely able to keep his eyelids open at this point. Liam looked over at Noel’s slumped form, an almost fond feeling creeping into his chest at the sight of his older brother's chin resting on his chest. They’d both sunk into the sofa and also somehow managed to gravitate towards each other during the evening and Liam could smell the faintest hint of Noel’s aftershave. It was a nice smell, kind of made Liam want to lean in and just take a deep inhale, fill his lungs with that smell and let it linger. So he did, his cheek brushed against Noel’s shoulder as he stuck his nose against his collar, taking a deep breath in.

“The fuck’re you doing?” Noel mumbled as he blinked heavily. He felt the tickle of the tip of Liam’s nose against his skin and suppressed a minute shiver.

“You smell good.”

Noel’s brow furrowed, “Stop that.”

“I missed it.”

“Hm?”

“Your smell. You always smelt good.”

“Unlike you.” Noel teased with a small upward twitch of his lips.

“Shut up.” Liam shuffled closer, ignoring Noel’s weak attempt to deter Liam before dipping his nose closer into Noel’s neck. Noel must have been more drunk than he’d thought, he’d meant to lean away, discourage Liam from getting so close but he tipped his head, exposing his neck more for Liam. Liam sighed against him, a content sound that Noel felt against his skin. “Just wanna…” The rest of Liam’s sentence was forgotten as he pressed himself closer, his lips now hovering closer, so close to touching skin that he hadn’t felt for years, that maybe he shouldn’t tempt himself with again but he was pleasantly drunk and he couldn’t think of a good excuse not to give in. He nuzzled the side of Noel’s face, smiling softly at the scratchiness of his stubble against his nose. “You should shave.”

Noel’s already deep frown lines deepened. “Fuck off. Why?”

Liam brushed his mouth against Noel’s jaw, “S’too rough.”

Noel turned his face to shake Liam off but in his drunken state turned to face Liam instead of away. Their noses bumped and Liam felt his nose catch his lips. Noel would have looked away to save himself from having to pull away, but he was caught now, trapped by the faded blue of Liam’s eyes. 

Liam’s smell had always been so fucking cloying, it stuck with you, stunk up the whole fucking place, got caught in the back of your throat and permeated your very pores, that’s what it felt like to Noel anyway. Even after he’d left he never could fully get rid of it.

Liam being the opportunist that he was, took advantage of Noel’s mistake and snuck a kiss that wasn’t asking for anything in particular, but invited more if Noel wanted. Noel let Liam’s lips move against his ever so carefully, he had half a mind to pull away and just call it a night, but everything felt hazy, warm, easy and right. Whether it was or not didn’t matter, it had always felt so right whenever they had done this. He’d come to terms long ago that he’d never know the feel of Liam’s lips ever again, he wasn’t supposed to know it in the first place, had wished many times that he hadn’t let his stupid jealousy get the better of him back then, but it didn’t feel like before. Maybe getting drunk had blanketed his inhibitions, numbed the guilt he should be feeling right now, but had he ever really felt guilty whenever they’d done this?

Liam let out a soft sound, a little pleading sound that one would associate with an omega, but despite their roles, Liam always deferred to Noel who had him wrapped around his little finger from the moment he’d presented. Noel shivered, turned his head to accommodate the kiss and finally reciprocate. Liam’s hand had at some point found his thigh, squeezing the soft flesh underneath hia jeans. Noel spread his legs a little wider, allowing Liam to slip his hand between them and cup the bulge growing there, he inhaled sharply as Liam pressed his heel against it.

“Liam…”

He said nothing, just captured Noel’s lips again and everything faded and time melted and warped, almost as if everything was coming to a very slow stand still around them. Noel’s senses had all but left him and before he knew it he was underneath Liam, could feel his skin against his, ragged breaths filled his ears as he felt long forgotten pleasure light up along his spine and tie his stomach in delicious knots. At some point he was looking up at Liam, watching him pant and squirm above him, their eyes met over Liam’s hairy valley and Noel was met with a look he’d not seen since well before Liam had started to turn grey. He tasted exactly the same he thought faintly before he was on his back again and Liam was panting, flushed with eyes wild and burning. Noel had no defence when he looked like that and the next thing he knew he was being spread open, filled for the first time in god knows how long. The sound of Liam’s skin slapping against his as he thrust into him again and again made Noel weak, his arms shook violently as he moaned, the feel of Liam’s cock stretching him open felt so fucking good that he nearly sobbed every time it hit that spot inside of him that had him throwing his head back and pushing back against him.

“Fuck…” Liam’s breathy voice just about reached his ears over his own laboured breathing. “Noel… fuckin’ tight… missed this…”

Noel couldn’t say anything. Couldn’t even conjure up a coherent thought. Liam’s cock managed to wipe away any and all functionality that Noel might have previously held. Liam gripped his hips, pulling him in as he thrust forward, desperate to get as deep as possible, he’d been away from his brother for too long. Any space between them now had to be eradicated, he needed to feel so deep inside Noel that somehow he’d leave a little bit of himself there, somewhere Noel would never be able to get him out.

Liam’s next thrust was especially hard and had Noel gripping the sheets beneath for purchase, “Ah~!” his face flamed from the sound Liam had forced out of him, but there was that spot again, and again and again. Suddenly he could hear everything, the sound of the mattress groaning beneath them, the sound of their sweat slicked skin slapping and sliding together, the breathy, determined grunts that Liam made every time he shoved his cock inside him, it was all too much.

“F-fuuuuck Liam…”

“Yeah? You like that?” Liam said, his teeth scraping across his bottom lip as he watched himself fuck into Noel. How he’d fuck himself on Liam’s cock.

Noel’s arms finally gave up as he fell forward, his cheek pressing into the sheets and rubbing against the cotton with every slam of Liam’s hips. He was slowing down now, but his thrusts lost no power. He let out a sound like a wounded animal, pitiful and pathetically needy. Liam was at his back then, snarling and grunting. His hand found his, sliding their fingers together as he circled his hips to pull another groan from Noel who tried to turn his head and look at him.

“You should see yourself right now… so fucking beautiful.” 

Noel almost preened at the devout sincerity that drenched Liam’s words if they weren’t then immediately followed by Liam’s mouth finding that spot on his neck that he’d used to seek out and beg for Noel to let him sink his teeth into. Noel had very nearly let him a few times. 

“Liam… no…”

He whined, sucking the gland there hard, a punishment for denying him. Noel keened. Liam always made it so hard for him to keep his resolve.

“You’re mine either way… just let me.” The gravel in Liam’s voice from the mounting frustration made Noel’s eyelids flutter, his whole body begging him to bare his neck to Liam. How he was still able to resist he didn’t know.

“M’not yours.” He managed despite Liam pushing him further into the mattress.

Liam growled, angry now. He pulled away without warning and Noel almost sobbed at the sudden emptiness that he was left with, but then Liam’s hands were on him, roughly turning him over onto his back before mounting him again. Spreading his legs impatiently before thrusting his cock back inside. Noel yelped and if he was in his right mind he would be ashamed of the way he clung to Liam, how his hands scrabbled to find purchase on his back before he buried his face into the crook of his neck, moaning and undulating under him like a freshly presented omega. But here he was, submitting under him and soaking in his scent, drowning in everything Liam. 

“Bullshit.” Liam said between grunts, “You’re fuckin’ mine. Always have been.”

It was shameful the way those words burrowed themselves under his skin and made his veins hum, his blood pumping with renewed purpose at Liam’s ownership. 

He bit his tongue hard. Nearly severed the muscle in two just to keep the words I’m yours from leaving his mouth. 

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum!”

Noel met Liam’s thrusts, too focused on his rapidly approaching orgasm to hear what Liam was saying.

“You’re gonna take it, yeah? Gonna let me cum inside? Put a fuckin’ baby inside of you.”

Noel clung tighter, nodding his head in his delirious pleasure. “Yes. Yes. Anything you want, just let me cum. Please, Liam, please!”

“Fuck you sound so sexy like this. So desperate…” Liam groaned, his hips losing rhythm. “Fuck, here it comes–!” His body stiffened as his orgasm burst from him, his cum filling Noel up as he spasmed.

Noel's face was almost the picture of serenity as a satisfied and relieved smile spread across his face as he felt Liam’s cock pulse, shooting his load deep inside him. Liam’s eyes had rolled into the back of his skull as he emptied himself, lost in the feeling of Noel’s tight hole squeezing every last drop from him.

Liam collapsed, his sweaty face sticking to the sweat on Noel’s neck. “Christ, our kid…” Noel felt his hot breath against his skin before he felt Liam’s tongue steal a taste, lapping over his very sore and abused gland. He felt vaguely that he should be worried if Liam had bitten him or not, but his body felt too light, too euphoric to care. The afterglow made him soft, he wasn’t particularly affectionate after sex, but his mind had been well and truly blown that he found himself snuggling into Liam as he moved off of him and made himself more comfortable. If Liam was surprised he didn’t say anything, just wrapped his arms around him. Noel felt the content rumble in Liam’s chest, almost akin to a deep purr, something which again would be expected more from an omega but Noel had never purred in his life and he wasn’t about to start now.

Liam mumbled something then but when Noel asked what he had said Liam was dead to the world and Noel hadn’t the energy or brains left to try and move him before following him.

Chapter Text

Liam woke up first, a killer headache pulsing behind his eyes. Not the most pleasant of things to wake up to as his senses slowly started to come back online. What even happened last night? He didn’t remember drinking all that much and he hadn’t gone out and gotten drunk because Noel and the kids had been over and— Noel had been over. He was suddenly aware of the body pressed up against him, fuck, that he was still buried in. Liam’s eyes snapped open to see Noel passed out and covered in last night's evidence. Christ, but Liam obviously hadn’t held back judging by the bruises and bite marks littering his skin. Liam looked about the same as he had a quick look down at himself, he’d almost blush if he wasn’t suddenly grinning like a lunatic at the fact that they had fucked last night. He could feel himself getting hard again although his knot was still quite nicely locked inside Noel. Fuck, but Noel wouldn’t be happy about that, that he’d cum inside him and knotted him, but it wasn’t his fault. Noel had begged for it; he was sure of it. Practically was sobbing for his knot, though Noel would never admit it, but it didn’t matter. The image had resurfaced itself and Liam knew it was true whatever Noel might say.

It was inevitable that Noel would begin to stir as Liam shifted, his knot pressing against Noel’s sensitive g-spot. Liam felt the hairs all over his body stand to attention when a moan slipped from Noel’s lips before he had even woken up, unconsciously pushing back into Liam who groaned, wrapping his arms around Noel’s middle and burying his nose into his neck as he wriggled against him.

“Shit… Noel, baby…”

Still half asleep, Noel turned into Liam, stretching leisurely. His body ached but in a way that had him feeling properly satisfied. Desire licked at the edges of his consciousness, his cock valiantly standing to attention despite his tiredness. His brain was still taking its time to fully remember where he was exactly, but the unmistakable sound of Liam’s voice against his ear woke him up quick.

“Liam?” He wasn’t exactly surprised to find himself being grinded up against, curled up in Liam’s bed, naked and covered in devastating evidence of what had happened last night, but a frisson of anxiety still coursed through him as he felt Liam’s cock press insistently against his arse.

Liam hummed in acknowledgement, lost once again in Noel’s scent and the feel of his body.

Noel felt the way his inner omega preened and melted against the attention, it had softened in his older age which was rather embarrassing. Liam seemed to sense it too and knew he could coerce Noel into staying here with him, fucking as if they were men thirty years their junior. Noel wished he could have stopped the release of slick in that moment, how degrading, that a man of his age would still get so wet, for Liam of all people. Even when they were younger he’d suppressed his urges for his younger brother and tried to make himself scarce whenever his heat would come about, although Liam always seemed to know before it even started and crowded him, making it nearly impossible to say no.

How he found himself here nearly twenty years later he didn’t know.

Liam nuzzled behind his ear, his dick sliding through his slick. “You’re wet again.”

Despite himself, Noel coloured. “Shut up.”

Liam didn’t. “Are you wet for me? For my cock?” He slid a hand between them, his fingers finding Noel’s used hole. He circled the muscle, felt the way it fluttered as he gently probed it. “Wanna fuck you again…”

Noel’s common sense was already slipping as his omega instincts took over. It seemed that no matter how old he got he couldn’t stop himself from craving the feeling of being filled by Liam. “Fuckin’ do it then…”

Liam found that irresistible patch on Noel’s neck again, but had the mind to be gentle. He knew he’d been rough last night and that Noel’s neck was probably sore and would be mottled with bruises, it hadn’t helped though that Noel had been moaning like a bitch in heat when Liam had barely had him on the tip of his cock. He stroked Noel’s thigh lovingly. He liked it when Noel needed him. 

He heard Noel gasp as he slipped back inside, so easily it made Liam groan. He was going to take his time now, he wanted to feel himself slowly filling him up, wanted to feel Noel shiver and arch with every thrust and make him cling to Liam as he shook from his climax.

Noel panted and whined; it was music to Liam’s ears. He kept his arms around him, keeping their bodies pressed tight as he uttered a litany of praises in Noel’s ear whilst he let him move at his own pace, quite happy to let Noel grind back against him until he felt him begin to tighten.

“Gonna cum for me again?”

Noel’s movements had grown a little more urgent as he felt his climax approaching.

Liam wanted to look at Noel this time so without warning he slipped out, making Noel cry out in protest, but Liam already had him on his back and was filling him up again before he had a chance to really complain.

“Oh, God…” Noel could barely breathe as Liam pushed his legs up, a position that no man his age should be trying to attempt, and started fucking into him like he could take it. “Li– am– can’t–”

Liam’s expression was focused, his face set and glistening with sweat as he drove his cock home with every single thrust. “Yeah you fuckin’ can. C’mon, Noel…”

Noel’s muscles burned, he was being pushed to his limit, but Christ did it feel good. He clung to whatever part of Liam he could reach. His arms, his shoulders, at some point Liam had slid their fingers together and they’re holding hands while he’s fucking into him and he’s looking right into his eyes and Noel’s looking right back. Liam’s skin is slapping against his and the sound is accompanied by the soft grunts Liam is making with every thrust and he forcing sounds from Noel that make his cock throb and he’s so fucking close…

Noel cums first. His eyes roll back and his mouth falls open and he looks so fucking beautiful as his cock makes a mess all over his belly and chest that Liam falters and buries his cock deep inside of Noel as he shakes and releases his load, filling Noel up with everything he has.

He’s exhausted and he’s a little out of it, but he can feel Liam moving him and then Liam’s lips are everywhere.

Noel can’t even muster the strength to open his eyes, his body was spent, he’d never gone that many rounds before even when he had been physically in his prime. He felt like his heart might just give out. “Liam… Liam, stop…” 

Liam was too busy licking up the mess that he had made over Noel’s stomach, revelling in the mixed taste of their cum and Noel’s sweat. He could feel Noel trembling underneath him, could hear his weak pleas for him to stop. If only he could, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t stop touching Noel, tasting him, taking him, again and again. Liam couldn’t contain the alpha inside that just wanted to claim Noel, over and over and over and over.

 He knew he had pushed Noel past his limit though. 

He crawled back up over Noel, his blackened eyes drinking in Noel’s sweaty, fucked out face. He nuzzled his cheek, stirring Noel from his semi-unconsciousness. As Noel’s face turned towards him, Liam captured his lips, the flavour of his own cum still on his tongue. He slipped it in, coaxing Noel’s own tongue to play with his. Noel moaned weakly.

“Fuck…” Liam breathed as they broke apart, his nose bumping affectionately with Noel’s. He couldn’t even find the words when Noel’s eyes fluttered open just enough for Liam to be able to see a slither of crystal blue. “Noel…”

“No more, Liam…” Noel could feel Liam’s cum leaking out of him and a part of him mourned that Liam hadn’t knotted him to keep it inside. “I can’t…”

Liam pressed a kiss between Noel’s brows. “It’s okay. Let me get you something to drink and then you can rest.” Liam felt somewhat guilty for Noel’s exhausted state, but he couldn’t feel too bad when he thought about being the reason for him looking like that. Lax and sated and leaking his cum, practically reeking of Liam. Fuck, but he could go again, he wondered if Noel would cry if he forced another orgasm out of him. He admonished himself quickly after the thought, although his cock didn’t seem to mind the idea, he wanted to take care of Noel and right now he needed to be a good alpha for him and give his omega some proper aftercare.

He came back a moment later with a glass of water and a few bags of crisps in case Noel wanted to snack on some later. Noel looked like he was out for the count though, but he couldn’t let him sleep without hydrating him a little.

“Noel. Hey, Noel, c’mon, you can’t sleep yet.”

Noel groaned and tried to turn away from Liam. 

“Don’t be like that, Noely. You need to drink something.” And a clean up too, he thought as he noted Noel’s cum covered thighs. Liam took a steadying breath, Noel looked too perfect like this. This was how he should have looked in his bed for all those years, if only he hadn’t been so stubborn.

He managed to get Noel to drink something before he turned back into his pillow and snuggled back down. Liam found it quite comical to watch a fifty seven year old man snuggle into a bed, but he found it a lot more endearing that his older brother had been reduced so that he was unconscious to embarrassment although Liam loved to see his brother red and flustered. He grabbed a towel and wiped between Noel’s legs, resisting the urge to lick him clean knowing Noel wouldn’t appreciate that. Once he’d cleaned him up he looked at the time, it was early still, he could stay up and let Noel sleep and go for a run, but the image in front of him was just too tempting to abandon and so he snuck back into his own bed and cuddled up behind Noel and hummed happily when he settled back into his arms.

It was mid-afternoon by the time Liam had woken up again. Very unusual for him, but the safety and comfort that came with being this close to Noel. Speaking of, Liam could no longer feel him pressed close. He reached across, expecting Noel to have rolled away as they’d slept, because he had grown too warm or crowded by Liam, but he wasn’t there. Liam opened his eyes and sure enough Noel had gone, he looked around in the bathroom and kitchen but he wasn’t anywhere and Liam was left with the sinking feeling that Noel had left without even saying goodbye. 

Liam tried not to worry. But it had been nearly a month and he hadn’t heard anything from Noel despite his best attempts to reach out. He didn’t want to overwhelm Noel but he was so scared that he had fucked it all up.

He’d replayed that night over and over again and tried to find something he’d done wrong. He had been pretty sure he had enjoyed it, Liam knew he had. Christ, he’d been going insane without Noel here. He couldn’t explain it, but he felt anxious without him around, more than just missing him. He needed to be near him, to make sure he was alright although there was no reason to be concerned about Noel. He just wished he would text him or better yet call him so he could hear his voice and know he was okay; that they were okay.

Once Noel got home and the door shut behind him he walked through his house and straight to his bedroom, despite just leaving Liam’s and sleeping most of the day away, and fell into his bed. He needed a shower, but he needed to sleep so much more. He’d slept and slept and slept but he’d also been fucked through the mattress like he hadn’t for years. His whole body was exhausted and sore and he wished he could say that it felt wrong and dirty, but he felt satisfied and he ached in such a way that he wanted to just bask in it a little, but he couldn’t stay at Liam’s. He’d never escape if Liam had woken up and he didn’t have it in him to endure any more of Liam’s seemingly unending libido.

He’d switched his phone off. Liam would call, he’d beg him to come back and Noel didn’t know if he’d be able to outrightly say no. Whatever had gotten into him last night had set something off inside of him. His omega senses had started blaring at full volume the moment Liam had kissed him, or had he kissed Liam… it didn’t matter, all that mattered was that he had been unable to control what he’d fought against for years and he fucking hated how good it felt.

How he managed to drag himself out of Liam’s bed he didn’t know. His omega was so furious at having to leave the warm, cozy nest that they’d well and truly christened and— No. It wasn’t a nest. Just because they’d fucked and it smelt of Liam, of both of them now, and he felt like he could sink right into the mattress and curl up in their combined scents didn’t mean it was a nest. Neither did it make it one just because his omega purred with satisfaction at being there.

No.

He needed to reel his omega back in. He’d already let it get too far. Let Liam fuck him until he was practically sobbing from pleasure. God, he’d fucked it all up in one moment of weakness and now he’d let Liam in further than he’d ever intended and given him far too much. All these years and he’d broken… maybe it was because Liam had mellowed over time, been softer, sweeter. Not that he hadn’t been when they were younger but he’d had the uncanny ability to be the biggest cunt in the world when he wanted to be. This older, gentler version of Liam had made him softer in return and he’d given in at the smallest of nudges.

He pressed his face into the sheets of his own bed, felt them cool against his cheek. Maybe if he just drifted off to sleep he’d wake up and find it had all been a dream, but the ache between his legs that lingered reminded him that it had all been very real.

Chapter Text

He felt like shit. And he’d had his fair share of drinking too much and one night stands. But this was miserable, never had a hang over lasted this long and he certainly hadn’t felt so fucking miserable after having a rough shag, though he wasn’t pushing sixty then. And it wasn’t his brother that he was trying not to think about… well, not all the time anyway.

It had to be old age because the guilt of leaving Liam the morning after was gnawing at him like a fucking parasite, but had he stayed God knows where that would have left them right now. They had been getting along, it had felt just like old times and Noel had been so happily basking in the comfortableness that they had regained, but maybe it had been a little too much like old times because look where they ended up again.

It had taken him the better part of a week to stop himself from thinking, yeah but it was good though. More than good. He’d not been fucked like that in years and it felt so good to finally be in someone’s hands that knew what he liked, what he could take, knew him from the inside out. It drove him insane, but it was true, for better or worse, Liam knew him like no one else could. He’d just barely stopped himself from going back to Liam’s and saying fuck it and going back to how it was, but that wouldn’t be wise. Sure they were different, mellower, less reactive, but with them it all could change on the head of a dime and Noel was too old for that shit, no matter what the voice inside him said.

He was half tempted to turn off his phone. He expected the onslaught of calls and texts that he promptly ignored. He wanted to answer them, he did, it made him feel even more like shit avoiding Liam, but what could he say? He’d made a huge fucking mistake going there again with him and now he’d have to let him down all over again. Surely Liam had to know that it wouldn’t be a sustainable way of living. They’d come so close to their own destruction fifteen years ago, they couldn’t go through that again. There was no way they’d survive this time. Another quarter of a century wasn’t on the table, honestly it made him ache just to think about it because he’d missed Liam. He had. As much as he’d tried to push it down and suppress it, that was still his little brother, still the man he’d gone through so much with in their youth. Their lives and shared experiences had bonded them and he’d mourned that bond even through the decaying years when he keenly felt the distance between them.

But what did he do now? They’d both wanted it, obviously, but even in his drunken state to give in so easily? His omega desires had long waned and settled, at least, that’s what he’d thought. Perhaps he should go to the doctor’s, he hadn’t had a check up like that in years – Never felt that need to go, but to have just lost his senses like that – Fuck, but he’d not been that reckless in forever. 

Not to mention he’d been feeling like absolute shit these last few days. Maybe after that he’d deal with Liam. He couldn’t ignore him forever and Liam would probably be driving himself spare. Fuck, but that wasn’t really fair. They were matured now, put all that shit in the past. His phone already had several missed calls – he should just grow some balls and call him. Tell him that he needed some time instead of just leaving him in the dark. He debated with himself for a few moments before picking up his phone and calling Liam’s number.

He wasn’t that shocked when Liam answered on the second ring.

“Noel? What the fuck man? I’ve been trying to call you. Are you alright?”

Noel sighed, “I know. And, yeah, I’m fine. I– uh… just didn’t know what to do.” Even by hearing his voice Noel felt that small spark from the other night start to reignite. Maybe he shouldn’t have called.

“What do you mean?”

Noel massaged his eyebrows, “The other night… Liam, we shouldn’t have–”

“Don’t go.” Liam interrupted, his voice sounding much more naked than he probably intended.

Noel paused. “What?”

“Don’t fucking leave again, okay? We can fix it, yeah? Just don’t… Don’t fucking leave again, man.”

Noel swallowed past the lump in his throat. “I’m not going to. It was both our faults. I’m to blame too. I just need some space, okay? Not going anywhere.” He suddenly felt the need to touch Liam. Be there to comfort him in some way.

“But, I thought–” Liam stopped himself. “Yeah… yeah, okay.”

Noel wanted to say something else but he wasn’t quite sure what. “I’ll call you, yeah? I just need to sort some things out.”

“Noel, I–” Liam paused for a long moment. “Yeah, sure.”

“I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Alright.”

As he hung up he realised that his hands had begun to sweat through his conversation with Liam. He couldn’t deny that hearing Liam’s voice for the first time since the other night had made his body react.

He tried not to but he couldn’t help thinking about the parts that had managed to stay in his memory. A bit hazy and choppy, but he remembered how Liam’s body had felt pressed against his back as he’d rut into him, spread him open and made him feel so… so…

“Fuck.” Noel said softly, he shouldn’t be thinking about this right now. But it was too late he was feeling too warm and he could feel his cock twitch as feelings unbidden began to rise to the forefront.

He resolutely ignored it though, but just hearing Liam’s voice had stirred something inside. He made his way into his room, sweat starting to form on his forehead. Embarrassingly he was hard. Christ, just from talking on the fucking phone.

“What the fuck is wrong with me?”

A shower. He should take a shower. A cold one. He threw his phone down on the bed and went straight into the bathroom, but as soon as he took his clothes off (another mistake) and the air hit his cock he shivered, the desire to touch himself even stronger. He turned the water on and stepped under the cold spray. He let out a rather unmanly noise as the water touched his warm skin, goosebumps instantly blanketing his arms and legs. He stayed under there until he was shivering, willing his erection to go away, but despite his best efforts it persevered. Growing frustrated and turning blue everywhere else except for where it mattered he shut off the water and dried himself off, only putting on a pair of boxers before taking himself to bed despite it being the middle of the afternoon.

Getting into bed he still didn’t feel any better. He was still hard despite the cold shower and his skin somehow hot to the touch again. He curled up feeling sorry for himself, whining miserably when he pressed his face into his pillow and only found his own scent there. Reaching for his phone again, he hoped to find something to distract him, anything to take his mind off of how horny he was right now.

That’s when he noticed a notification for a missed call. He thought he’d deleted all of his messages, but as he looked it realised it had been made whilst he had been in the shower, he cringed when he realised who the caller was.

The thing is, he shouldn’t have played the message. In a right sense of mind he wouldn’t have, but before he could think better of it Liam’s voice sounded quietly through the speakers. Noel pressed the phone to his ear, a pitiful sound passing his lips as he closed his eyes.

“Aright, our kid? It’s, uh, only me. I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I don’t want to push you away and the other night I was drunk and fuck man I just… I really missed you. I’m not askin’ for things to be how they were, I know that’s probably nigh im-fuckin’-possible, but I can’t pretend either that it didn’t feel really fucking good. I don’t know about you, our kid, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. Fuck, you were so…” Liam’s voice trailed off and Noel had to bite his lip hard, ignoring desperately how Liam’s whispered confession at the end sent shivers along his spine. “You should have fuckin’ stayed. We could have at least talked about this face to face, you’ve always got to fuckin’ run away.” Liam huffed, an amused tone to his voice. “Who am I kidding? I doubt we would have got much talking done. If it were up to me I’d still have you up in my bed now. Christ, Noely… If you fuckin’ knew what you do to me…”

Noel cursed under his breath. “Fuck, Liam…”

At some point Noel’s other hand had started palming over his boxers.

“I won’t ask you to come back. I’ll give you your space, but…”

Noel heard Liam curse faintly as if he had taken the phone away from his face. 

“I need you. Always fuckin’ have.”

Noel’s hand was inside his boxers now, teasing his cock, all prior reservations gone. “Need you too…”

“Bye, Noel.”

The call ended, but Noel was too worked up now. It had taken everything in him to drag himself out of Liam’s bed. Christ, just feeling how sore and used he’d felt the next day made slick form between his legs. He worked his cock some more, whining in frustration before he spread his legs wider, reaching back to play with his hole. His face flamed when he felt the stickiness, how humiliating to be this sensitive, he suddenly felt sixteen again. He didn’t bother easing himself, he shoved two fingers inside himself, wishing they were Liam’s and hating himself for how quickly and earnestly that thought came. 

When he came with a rough tug of his cock and a tear sliding down his cheek he lay there, spent and a little hollow. He hadn’t realised how big his bed was before as he curled up on his side. He hugged his pillow and closed his eyes, choosing sleep over trying to face any of the thoughts and feelings that had been temporarily silenced. 

~~~

Noel hadn’t been to the doctors for fucking years and he remembered just why as he sat in the doctors office chair.

“So, what seems to be the problem?”

“I’ve been feeling out of sorts lately. I’ve been feeling…” Noel fought against the word he was about to use, but couldn’t find a good enough substitute to went with it anyway, internally wincing. “Hormonal. My, uh, omega has been kind of “active” lately should we say.”

“What do you mean by active?”

God, Noel hated going to the doctors.

“Uuh, sexually, I guess. A couple of weeks ago I felt it wake up and react which it hasn’t done in years. It’s been dormant pretty much the last several years. It was really unexpected and I uh, lost myself to it.”

“Okay. Were you sexually active on this occasion?"

This was an awful idea.

“...Yes.”

“Was it an alpha that you had sex with?”

“Yes.”

“Did you know the alpha in question?”

“Is that relevant?”

“It might just give me a better understanding of what happened.”

“We’re… we’ve been friends.”

“Have you had these feelings towards them before?”

Noel fidgeted, “I don’t see how this is going to help. Whether I know them or or not, so what?”

“Well, it sounds to me that your omega instincts were kicked into gear by this alpha. Have your instincts taken over with other partners before?”

Noel felt like he was under a microscope. He’d felt something with his ex’s sure, but his omega had never taken over like that, he’d never given it the chance to, except one time when he was younger when he and– “Not like this.”

“Have you considered any of your past mates to be a true mate?”

“I don’t believe in that.”

The doctor nodded. “Alright, but do you think perhaps it felt different this time because your omega recognised this alpha as its true mate?”

Noel felt his blood start to run cold.

“No, that’s–” He shook his head, “That doesn’t exist.”

“It’s rare,” The doctor conceded, “But it does happen.” They turned to their computer, “I see here you’ve been on suppressants for a long time.”

“Yes, and?”

“And you stopped taking them when?”

“8 years ago. Once I turned fifty there was no need for them.”

The doctor was silent for a moment as he looked over Noel’s notes, humming occasionally as he read. “Alright, I think we should do some tests and see, but I think having been on suppressants for so long your hormones have been out of balance. Possibly some delayed response to alpha stimuli that you denied when you started them.”

“Delayed?” That was a fucking understatement. He was in his fifties for God’s sake! “So, what? I just have to deal with it?”

The doctor pursed their lips. “I’m not saying that, but I wouldn’t recommend taking suppressants again.”

Noel deflated.

“I think we should take some blood, let me check your hormonal levels and we’ll go from there.”

Noel nodded. “Okay, fine. What do I do in the meantime?”

“Just take it easy. Try not to stress and maybe keep a distance from your alpha friend for the time being.”

“Why?”

“If your hormones are being unpredictable then perhaps it’s best not to stir them up right now.”

Great.

Noel left the doctors office with a sore left arm and a sense of anxiety that hadn’t quite abated as he’d hoped it would.

He phoned Liam that night.

“Hey.” Liam’s voice sounded kind of tired, but then again, maybe Noel was just projecting. “How’s it going, man?”

Noel felt more relaxed now talking to Liam which he didn’t put too much thought into as he leant back into his plush sofa.

“Fine, good. I went to the doctors today.”

“Are you alright?” Liam’s concerned voice filled Noel with a sense of warmth.

“Yeah, yeah, everything's fine.”

“You sure? You sound weird.” There was a beat of silence. “Noel…” Liam said carefully. “Are you pregnant?”

Noel almost stopped breathing. “What the fuck, Liam? Of course I’m fucking not! Are you insane?” Noel unconsciously touched his stomach as it lurched. “Why the fuck would you say that?”

“Sorry, sorry.” Liam placated. “I just thought–”

“Well don’t. Jesus…” Noel suddenly felt uncomfortable and antsy talking to Liam. “I just called to say I won’t be around for a little while. I’m getting some tests done.”

“Okay.” 

Noel could hear the disappointment but he couldn’t handle hearing the slight hopefulness in Liam’s voice when he asked the question.

“Noel?”

“Mm?”

“Let me know that you're okay, okay?”

“Yeah, okay. But don’t worry, I’m fine.”

“Promise?” How Liam managed to make himself sound so unsure and childlike with just that one word he didn’t know, but again it made Noel feel like a piece of shit for ending the call.

“I promise.”

~~~

“I’m sorry? No. No. No. No. No fucking no.”

“You’re pregnant, Mr. Gallagher.”

The doctor’s office was deadly quiet. For a moment Noel thought he’d misheard. He blinked. Maybe he had yet to wake up from a nightmare or had fallen into some cursed alternate reality.

“Mr. Gallagher? Noel?”

He eventually came back to himself. He shook his head vehemently. “No. No, you’ve made a mistake.”

The doctor looked sympathetic. Cunt. “I know this is probably not what you wanted to hear–”

“You’re fucking right! There’s no way I’m fucking pregnant!”

“Mr. Galla–”

“You better check again because there is no way!”

“We’ve done the tests, Noel. If it would make you feel better–”

“Probably not.”

“You could take a pregnancy test. Right here to see for yourself.”

Noel shook his head. His head was swimming and he had to take a long, deep breath. “Right, well, we need to get rid of it. Right fucking now.”

“Are you sure? Do you want some time–”

“No. No, I want an appointment, a pill, whatever. I want it done as soon as possible.”

Noel left the office with shaking hands, one of them clutching a pharmacy bag as he legged it out of there as fast as he could. As soon as he got home and the door closed behind him it was like there was a roaring in his ears. Suddenly the world was falling out beneath his feet. His knuckles were white where they clutched the bag containing the pill that would make this all go away. Despite that for a moment he had no idea what to do, but he wasn’t going to fall apart. He had a plan. He’d rid himself of the problem, but he couldn’t believe he’d allowed this to happen in the first place. Pregnant. Pregnant! At his age! By his own fucking brother no less! Fuck! FUCK!

He shook his head as he opened up the white bag and took out the pill bottle. He let the bag fall to the floor as he made straight for the kitchen, grabbing a dirty glass from the side and filling it up at the sink. His hands were still shaking as he tried to twist the lid off, swearing to himself before he finally got the lid off and let it scatter across the side. He let the pill fall out onto his palm, it was white and pink. He took a shuddering breath as he chucked it into his mouth and brought the glass to his lips. His heart was racing, but just as he raised the glass he found that he couldn’t make himself swallow the water, the pill sticking to his tongue. 

Fuck. Why couldn’t he fucking swallow it? He was pregnant with his brother’s fucking baby! He had to sort it out. He forced himself to chug the whole glass, water spilling down his chin. The pill washed down his throat and he gasped for breath as he finished the last of the water.

“Shit…” Okay. It was done. How long did these things take to work again? He found the bag he’d discarded and went to find some paper inside that had more info on the pill but before he could he was overcome with a wave of such guilt. He hadn’t even told Liam. Consulted him about it. Not that he would have much of a say, but he hadn’t even told him. He could have at least talked about it with him before taking the pill. Liam would be devastated. But, then again, Liam wouldn’t have to know now anyway. It was over. Liam wouldn’t have to be hurt, wouldn’t have to feel sad about making this decision because lord knows he would be, but if he ever found out he’d feel betrayed, of that Noel had no doubt. Noel clenched the white bag, it was fine. Fine. Whether Liam knew or not this would still be the end result. He didn’t have to–

Noel’s phone rang then. He took it from his pocket and stared down at Liam’s name lit up on the screen. Noel’s stomach lurched, he rushed to the toilet and fell to his knees as he emptied his stomach into its bowl. He kept retching until there was nothing left and as he raised his head he could see the pink and white pill stuck to the side of the bowl. His phone which he had dropped on the bathroom floor in his panic rang several more times before it went to voicemail. Noel rested his head against his arm on the toilet seat, trying to catch his breath.

He flushed the toilet after a few moments and watched as the pink and white pill swirled around with the bile before disappearing. Fucking great. He rinsed his mouth out and splashed his face with cold water before picking up his phone and seeing that Liam had indeed left a message. He turned his phone off. He couldn’t listen to that right now. He threw his phone on the bed before flopping down onto it himself. He’d have to get another fucking prescription tomorrow and this time he wouldn’t be such a fucking pansy about it and he’d have no thoughts of Liam fucking him up.

It wasn’t like Liam was going to going to carry the fucking thing. Noel was the one who had to worry about having it. And he didn’t want to. Fuck his age. He wasn’t having a baby. 

His stomach made a noise in protest at being pulled and emptied with little in it to begin with. But Noel was tired and had no desire to eat so he stripped off and got into bed. Hiding away from the world was a lot more appealing than facing reality right now. He still felt nauseous and he’d dealt with enough today. Liam and everything else could wait.