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Steve was still frozen, of that he was sure. He couldn’t move. He was frigidly cold, unable to even shiver. But he was alive and awake. He couldn’t see, his eyes frozen shut, but he could hear. Ever since the serum, his hearing had been exceptionally good. He could hear outside the block of ice he was encased in. There were people around, discussing the best way to melt the ice so they could thaw him out.
Quieter, obviously not in the room, but nearby, Steve heard someone discussing plans for him. They discussed the possible ways to extract the serum if he was dead and the minute chance of him being alive and waking him up. If that unlikely scenario happened, they had a plan to ‘ease him in’ to the knowledge that it wasn’t 1945 anymore, but 2012.
The door opened and he could tell by the sounds of their footsteps that multiple people came in. Two. Two people had just walked in, somewhere off to his left.
“How much longer until you gain access to his body instead of a block of ice?” a gruff voice barked.
“At the rate this is melting, a while. Maybe as much as ten hours, with more time for the body to thaw after that,” someone off to Steve’s right replied immediately. “We’ll be able to send him to the morgue. I assume you’ll announce his recovery and burial—”
“Sir—Fury, look!” a woman gasped
“What, Hill?” that gruff voice demanded.
“You…”
“Spit it out, Maria!”
“You’ve got a soulmark on your forearm, Nick.”
“Steven Grant Rogers,” Nick Fury said. “Fuck. He must still be alive.”
“You’re his soulmate,” Maria Hill said feebly.
“No. If he’s alive, then he’s a SHIELD asset. As the Director of SHIELD, I cannot have an asset as my soulmate. He’d be taking orders from me.”
There was a pause then Maria sighed. “His name faded.”
A sucked in breath from Steve’s right. “His name is on your collarbone, now. Almost on your neck. Assistant Director Hill,” the technician thawing him out added hurriedly.
“No. Just…no.” Maria did not sound happy.
“Yours faded, too,” Nick told her after a moment.
And Steve realized that, in less than five minutes, he found out he was sixty-seven years in the future, frozen in a block of ice that was currently being thawed by an organization called SHIELD, who was now going to do what they could to use him. And in quick succession, he’d apparently been rejected by two potential soulmates, the Director and Assistant Director of this SHIELD, when he’d never had a mark before now.
*****
Steve was on something called a Helicarrier, which just appeared to be a military base that could fly. Aliens were coming—although two of them had already come—and a group of people had been gathered to fight them off. Or try to.
One man was there, Dr. Banner, who Steve had been informed before arrival, could turn into a big, green, raging man, but supposedly wasn’t there to fight. He was only there to track down the Tesseract, which Howard Stark, and then SHIELD, had tried to study and draw power from before it was taken.
There were other people there, too. A female SHIELD agent who radiated threat in every line of her body, Howard Stark’s son—who Steve was reserving judgement on, until he actually spoke with the guy face to face to see if he was as much of an asshole as his father—and a friendly alien, Thor the God of Thunder. As opposed to his unfriendly brother, now held in a see-through, possibly glass cell.
There was apparently also another guy, but he was brainwashed through magic by the unfriendly alien and not around.
Everything was overly suspicious to Steve. Even the fact that the bad alien, Loki, was kept in a glass cage. He was, according to Thor, the God of Mischief. Things that Nick was saying, things that everyone was saying, had Steve go looking through the bowels of the flying ship.
He was pissed at what he found. HYDRA weapons stored on the SHIELD ship.
He was just about to enter the room with Loki’s scepter, where multiple of his supposed teammates were gathered, when he heard Agent Romanov say dryly, “When did you become such a fan of Captain America, Stark?”
“What?”
“You go writing his name on your skin? You want to impress him or something?”
There was a moment of silence before Tony exclaimed, “What the hell?!”
Steve just couldn’t make himself walk in and interrupt. He hated himself a little bit for it, but he just stood there, listening.
“How in the hell have I matched up with him? I’m me. I’m totally awesome and he has a stick up his ass. There’s no way I’m actually the soulmate to Steve Fucking Rogers, Mr. Conservative Goodie Two-Shoes. He’s from the forties. There’s no way he even likes men. He’s probably against same sex relationships.”
Propping the gun against his leg, Steve shifted and pulled at his stretchy suit enough to look at his bicep, where Nicholas Joseph Fury and Maria Christina Hill were both grayed out. Underneath their names appeared Anthony Edward Stark.
As he watched, Tony’s name faded to the same gray as the others. He’d rejected Steve, too. Not that it was all that surprising, given the derision of his words as he rejected him. Or who he thought Steve was. What was surprising was to see the name Natalia Alianovna Romanova appear a second later, directly underneath. The names he was accumulating could now be termed a list.
Stark barked out a humor-filled laugh. “Now he’s on your skin.”
Natasha snorted indelicately. “Too much of a boy scout for me. I’m an assassin. The Black Widow.”
As Steve watched, her name faded, too.
He could only sigh when a new name appeared, directly under Natalia’s name. Robert Bruce Banner. Was he going to go through every supposed Avenger until someone didn’t reject him?
“Oh, no. No way. I can’t be anyone’s soulmate, I’m too dangerous.” His name grayed out, too.
Not wanting to see any more, not wanting to face anymore rejection in such a short period of time—five names in two short weeks of being in this century—Steve straightened his joke of a battle suit and picked up the HYDRA gun again. He straightened his spine and opened the door to face three people who Fate had deemed compatible but who had just rejected him.
*****
They’d won what was being called the Battle of New York and Stark insisted that all the Avengers moved in. Steve almost asked the man if he thought that inviting his rejected soulmate to live in the same building as them was a good idea. He didn’t, but it was close. Steve had never been one to hold his tongue, but soulmates were not the same as standing up to a bully, someone trying to take advantage of another, or a person mistreating an animal. He kept his mouth shut.
He didn’t move in. He hated the apartment that SHIELD stuck him in, knowing he was being watched and followed every time he was out. But he would take that over moving into Stark’s building. Where he was constantly watched, and would still be followed every time he was out. He already had to be at the Tower, around them, for training and meetings. He didn’t want to have to live there, too.
He was about to enter the gym, where he knew the others had already arrived, when he heard Stark ask, “Hey, how come neither of you got the Star-Spangled octogenarian on your skin?”
“What do you mean?” That was Thor and he sounded confused.
“He’s talking about soulmarks,” Natalia said smoothly.
“I already have a soulmark,” Clint told Tony.
“Ah,” Thor intoned. “Asgardians do not have soulmates. But if we did, I believe it would be my Lady Jane. I am deeply committed to her.”
At least Steve wasn’t going to have to watch more names get added to the list on his arm, which now reached to his elbow. He wished he didn’t have what he had now. His mind pondered that thought as he entered the gym.
“It’s nonagenarian, Stark, not octogenarian.” Steve said blatantly as he walked in. Maybe letting them know that he could hear them would get them to stop talking about him behind his back. And maybe pointing out their attitudes would make them change, so that he felt less crummy when he was with them. “Let’s get started,” he ordered. “The sooner we start, the sooner we finish. Which I’m sure is what you all want, since none of you actually want to be around me.” He ignored Thor’s protests as he took his shield off the holster on his back and started barking orders.
*****
It was when Steve was walking around Brooklyn, trying to relearn the area, that he came up with a plan. So many people in this century had tattoos. It wasn’t taboo anymore. He saw them everywhere. And there were so many different styles now. He could cover his list with a tattoo.
He’d rather have a tattoo that he liked covering the names, anyway. He’d rather have something that he could look at and feel good about, instead of feeling the need to wear long-sleeved shirts he could only push up to his forearms before a rejected soulmark was displayed.
It took a bit of research on a computer at the library—and a bit of maneuvering to lose his SHIELD tails—before he went into a tattoo and piercing shop. The place wasn’t big, but it wasn’t small either. And it appeared to be clean and well-lit. It was reassuring. He’d kind of been expecting dim and dirty, like a place you’d go in secret, as it had been in his day.
He went up to the woman behind the counter. She had many interesting piercings on her face and it was hard not to stare.
“Can I help you?”
He was about to say why he was there, but what came out of Steve’s mouth was infinitely more embarrassing. “Is your tongue pierced?”
The woman warily looked up from her paperwork before recognition sparked in her eyes. She must’ve seen the disbelief and shock, not judgement, on his face because the wariness faded and amusement took its place. She grinned. “Yes, it is.”
She stuck her tongue out and Steve stared at it in fascination as she showed him the top then bottom. “Why? Did it hurt?”
“It hurt less than you would think. And do you mean why do people get their tongues pierced or why did I?”
He could only shrug.
“I got it because I like piercings and it matches my style. For others, there are a multitude of reasons they might get it done. Self-expression, to boost confidence, sexual pleasure or expression, emotional healing by taking back control of their body, even religious or cultural purposes or beliefs.”
“Huh.” It was all he could think to say. But some of what she’d said continued to ring in his head. Taking back control of their body. It had become clear in the weeks he’d been awake that SHIELD thought they could keep watch on him and attempt to monitor and control his movements. What he was going to do… He doubted they’d approve of Captain America getting a tattoo.
He blinked a few times, shaking his head and forcing himself back to the reason he was there. “You’ve got an artist here by the name of Bucky? Do you have any more examples of his or her work? There were only a handful of pictures on the website.”
Her eye widened a fraction, but then she smiled at him. “Of course, we do. Each of our artists has a full portfolio with examples of their work. Bucky’s very talented. He sort of grew up in the business. His uncle was the one who owned this shop before he retired and Bucky took over.”
“I’d like to see it, his portfolio, if that’s alright. And if you could tell me if he’s able to copy someone else’s art or a picture and do it justice, I would appreciate it.”
*****
At his name, Steve looked up from the chair he’d been waiting in for hours.
Apparently, Bucky was a busy guy, even for someone just wanting a consult. Wanda wasn’t quite so busy. After thinking about it, and after asking her more questions, about safety and things he should know before deciding, Steve got his tongue pierced. Because fuck the image SHIELD and the Avengers had of him. It was his body, not theirs.
The serum was certainly convenient because a stunned Wanda declared him completely healed after less than four hours. She still insisted that he did all the aftercare stuff, but she said that it looked as if he’d had the piercing for a full month, not just a few hours.
When Steve met the eyes of the man calling his name, he nearly swallowed his new piercing as well as his tongue. The guy was absolutely gorgeous. He pushed that aside because he had half an arm of faded soulmarks proving that most people, even people in his own line of work, didn’t see past the suit and shield to the man underneath.
“Why don’t you follow me back and we’ll talk.”
The man, presumably Bucky, turned and headed to the back. He led Steve to the very last section. As far as Steve could see, the only other things beyond the room they were in were two doors, one of them leading to a bathroom, the other shut, looking like it needed a key to open.
“I’m Bucky,” the man said.
He looked expectantly at Steve, which surprised him. There hadn’t been a single person Steve had met, since the attempted invasion, who hadn’t known who he was on sight. One look into Bucky’s eyes told him that Bucky knew who he was, too. But he was still going through the motions of an introduction. It made Steve’s shoulders relax slightly.
“Steve. I appreciate you seeing me. I know I didn’t have an appointment.”
Bucky shrugged. “It’s the end of the day, or nearly, and I don’t have anyone else on my schedule. And Wanda likes you.”
“I like her. Most people treat me like—” He cut himself off with a shake of his head. But when Bucky made an inquiring sound, he finished. “Most people treat me like I’m not human. Like I’m a thing, there for them to use or for their entertainment. Or like I’m a doddering old fool or a rigid prick.”
Bucky snorted. “Most people are idiots,” he muttered. Steve heard it loud and clear. But before he could respond, Bucky asked, “So, why did you come in? Obviously, it was tattoo related, but what exactly do you want or want to know?”
Steve decided to lay his cards on the table. If Bucky agreed, there would be no hiding the truth. He would know at the first glance. But first… “Will anything I say here go beyond this room?”
Bucky gave him a serious look. “First, I’m going to say I’m sorry. It’s really shitty that you even have to ask that question. Second, I’m going to assure you that everything said in this room stays in this room. Like Vegas.” He quirked a lopsided grin. “Seriously, though. Everything will stay just between us.”
Maybe it was stupid but Steve believed him. With a sigh, he pulled off his shirt and showed the man his arm.
“I want something to cover this up.”
Bucky sucked in a breath, then reached for the gray list. He stopped just short of touching, looking up as if to ask for permission. Steve actually really appreciated it. He gave a nod and Bucky ran his thumb across the skin.
“How in the hell have you been rejected by this many people?” he murmured. “All the stories out there about you…?”
Steve could only sigh and look away. “That’s just it. All the stories about me. The government had nearly seventy years to say whatever they wanted. Nobody wants Captain America.”
“Screw Captain America!” Bucky exclaimed with a fierce expression on his face. He covered the list with his palm. “All these people are fucking idiots. I grew up with stories about you, Steve.” When Steve looked back at him, Bucky gave a half grin. “Born and raised in Brooklyn. We still tell stories about you. About you. All the fights you were in, standing up to bullies, patrolling the streets, walking women home, helping men, women, children, and animals. Standing up for the little guy. Making Brooklyn safer. You’re a hero here. Steve Rogers, not Cap.”
Steve felt his eyes fill but didn’t let the tears fall. “Thank you.”
“So, you want something to cover up the names of complete and utter morons. I get it. Do you have anything in mind?”
Steve shifted to reach into his pocket and Bucky’s hand fell away. He’d just pulled the paper out when Bucky sucked in a sharp breath.
“What?” Steve asked, looking up. But Bucky didn’t answer. He just stared at the gray list.
When Steve looked down, he was saddened to see a new name added, this one in black. Now the list stretched below his elbow. He wasn’t even going to be able to push up his sleeves without others seeing.
He sighed. “I guess what I was going to ask for won’t work. I’ll need something to cover that, once the person rejects the mating.”
Bucky finally looked up, wide-eyed. “I don’t think you’re going to need something to cover that up.”
“Why not?” Steve couldn’t summon any enthusiasm or hope. He’d been through this same thing too many times before. Reaching up, he touched each name, then repeated, word for word, what each person said when he was rejected. “It’s really not a stretch to assume that whoever James Buchanan Barnes is, he’ll reject me, too.”
Bucky appeared to gather himself, pushing away the anger that had appeared at Steve quoting each person on the list. He looked Steve in the eye. “I’m James Barnes.” He reached for his wallet and pulled out his ID. “Bucky is short for Buchanan.”
“You’re…” He stared at the ID.
Bucky reached out with both hands, gently cupping Steve’s cheeks, and eased his face up so their eyes met. “I’m not going to reject you. I’m going to love you.”
*****
Steve didn’t even have to pack a bag. Almost everything in the apartment was acquired by SHIELD. The only things Steve took were his sketchbooks, the few pictures he’d framed of his ma and some friends, long since gone, and some necessities like his toothbrush and straight razor. Everything fit easily into the case that held his shield.
He took a moment, before putting the few items in, to check the case over for any tracking devices. He didn’t have to worry about his motorcycle because every time he went to Stark’s Tower, he asked Jarvis to scan his bike for surveillance so he could destroy it. Eventually SHIELD had stopped bugging it.
He pulled the one tiny bug out, tossing it over his shoulder instead of crushing it, then put his sketchbooks in. Just for the hell of it, he went back and grabbed a few of his Henley’s. They were long-sleeved, as he’d been wearing, but they were comfortable. And they fit him snugly, which he thought—hoped—Bucky would like.
Glancing around the place he intended to never step foot in again, Steve walked out. He went to the tattoo shop, making sure to lose his SHIELD tails well before he got there. Bucky lived above the shop and, after hearing about Steve’s living situation, had offered for Steve to move in. It wasn’t strange to him, since soulmates when he’d grown up had usually gotten married and lived together within a few days of meeting. And, besides, with Bucky, things just felt right. More right than they did with anyone else.
Wanda had squealed and hugged him when she found out the news. And he’d ended up telling her just a little of what he’d been dealing with.
“Can you get me their pictures? I will absolutely be the witch who guards the gate. If I can know what they look like, I’ll make sure anyone who comes in here leaves you alone.”
He’d given her a hug for that, then hunted down or taken pictures of everyone. If this was going to be his place to be with Bucky, he didn’t want Cap’s life touching it.
When Steve got to the shop, with his case holding his shield and a few possessions, Wanda grinned at him. “Right on time. Head on back. You’ve got an appointment with Bucky.”
Curious, he did as he was told.
“Hello, love,” Bucky greeted. He’d started calling Steve that less than an hour after they’d both accepted being soulmates. Neither one of them was in love, yet, but it would come eventually. “I’ve got your seat all ready for you.”
With a grin, Steve set the case aside and sat down.
Bucky placed his hands on Steve’s thighs and leaned in for a chaste kiss. “Now, I have a suggestion that I hope you’ll like. We’ll cover the list of morons, of course. I’ve made time for that and we can go for as long as we want, since you’ll be the last tat of the day. Wanda’s going to close up and head out of here when it’s time, but we don’t have to stop then. Before I do that, though, I want to say this. We’re soulmates, and I will never reject you.”
The words were reassuring, after everything that had happened.
“And you can say no if you want, but before we cover the morons, do you want me to tattoo rings on both of our fingers?
Bucky took Steve’s left hand and held it tight. Steve felt his breath catch in his chest.
“Now,” Bucky continued before he could speak, “I’m not a very traditional guy. I’ll tell you up front that I don’t want a wedding. But I am absolutely willing to make a commitment to you. I am willing to let you put a ring on my finger, so to speak. Though I’d be the one putting it there, since I’m the tattoo artist. I—”
“Yes,” Steve interrupted. “Men couldn’t have legal marriages when I was growing up. I never cared about that. It’s the commitment that matters to me. I won’t keep you or our relationship a secret, but I don’t need or want a wedding either. Especially not since everyone I knows only sees Cap, not Steve.”
“Not everyone,” Wanda said from the doorway.
It was a fairly simple matter for Bucky to ink wedding bands on their fingers. Afterwards, Wanda gleefully handed them each a foil-wrapped piece of chocolate candy—to their amusement—and said, “This witness now pronounces you committed soulmates! Yay!” She gave each of them a big, smacking kiss on the cheek, then headed back to the front.
“I don’t know, Buck.” Steve grinned. “I think I might be a little bit in love with Wanda.”
Bucky barked out a laugh. “That’s okay. I am too. She’s awesome. And gay as they come. She goes home to her female soulmate every night.”
“Good,” Steve said softly. “I’m glad she has someone. She deserves it.”
They spent the rest of the evening and into the night covering up Steve’s gray list of names, neither of them calling it quits until the detailed howling wolf was done. Then they went upstairs to their apartment to sleep.
*****
Bucky sat and watched Steve as he worked out. He was supposed to be working out, too, but he’d stopped the arm curls because he couldn’t stop staring at his soulmate. Goddamn, the man was fine. He was beautiful, sure, but what got Bucky’s motor really running was his strength.
Steve was currently on the pull up bar. But he wasn’t doing pull ups. He was above it, seven feet in the air, doing handstand push-ups. The perfect form, the bulging muscles, the droplets of sweat slowly dripping from abs to chest, from bicep to wrist—it was a stunning sight to see. It made Bucky think of the night before when Steve had so easily picked him up and moved him where he wanted him. He hadn’t broken a sweat then. It had been so easy for him. And Bucky wasn’t a small guy.
A drop of sweat slid from the howling wolf—Steve’s drawing that Bucky had inked—down across Bucky’s name. It had a shiver running up Bucky’s spine. No feelings ever transferred from one soulmate to the other, but the sight of it, thought of it, had Bucky’s breath coming a little faster.
He put down the weight he’d been holding but not exactly using. Then he got up and strolled over.
“Come on down from there, sexy. I want a kiss.”
The smile that lit up Steve’s face was beautiful.
Bucky remembered how sad his eyes had been when they’d first met. When he’d found why, when they’d gotten each other’s names, Bucky had silently vowed to make the man as happy as he could every chance he got. It was why he’d suggested wedding rings inked on their fingers, even though he had never cared to get married. That suggestion had made Steve’s eyes shine. At the symbol of it, Bucky knew. At the promise. He had been getting rejected all his life, both before and after the serum. Bucky had silently made it his mission to always give him the support and love he needed.
Steve flipped down from his handstand, his loose shirt falling back down to cover those bitable abs. The unintentional display of power only had Bucky wanting to climb his soulmate even more. Steve, it seemed, was just having fun. Bucky was horny as fuck.
He grabbed Steve by the sweaty collar of his sleeveless shirt and pulled him along, backing himself against the wall and pulling Steve in to cage him there. Steve went easily enough, his eyes growing darker with every step. By the time they’d hit the wall, they both were breathing faster. Steve pressed tightly to him.
“So fucking hot,” Bucky murmured against Steve’s lips.
Steve started kissing him, nibbling at his lips. When he ran the ball of his tongue piercing against the seam of Bucky’s lips, Bucky opened his mouth in a gasp. Steve took full advantage, slipping his tongue in. The piercing clacked gently against his teeth before passing through and exploring his mouth, shifting against his tongue. It was hot.
A hand wrapped around Bucky’s thigh and pulled his leg up. Their cocks rubbed against each other, causing them both to moan quietly.
Steve shifted closer and Bucky tried to gasp. It didn’t work, since Steve was still kissing him breathless. He was overwhelmed in the best possible way.
“What the fuck?”
The unexpected voice came from a dozen feet away. Steve reluctantly pulled back and Bucky looked over. He saw the Avengers, Earth’s Mightiest Morons, many of whom had Steve’s name faded on their skin.
“You’re interrupting,” Steve told them steadily.
“We came to work out,” the redhead said. She had her lips slightly pursed and was observing them with a laser focus.
Bucky stayed quiet. With as much as Steve had told him about his team, he knew this was something Steve needed to handle. They all saw him as an uptight boy scout, a goodie two-shoes, and a prude. Now they were getting a peek at something different.
“So, go work out,” Steve said. “We’re not stopping you.”
“You’re making out against the wall,” Tony Stark said, seeming flabbergasted. “In a public space!” Or maybe he was scandalized.
“Says the man who’s had more sex tapes leaked than all the Kardashians combined,” Bucky muttered.
Steve snorted out a laugh. Everyone heard them.
“I thought this was the private section of the Tower,” Steve said to Stark. But he didn’t look away from Bucky. There was a gleam in his eye that absolutely told him that his soulmate was fucking with them all.
With a glance over, Bucky could see the various expressions on their faces. Stark showed shock clear as day. The redhead—Steve’s Natalia, most likely—looked disturbed. Another man, with messy brown hair specked with grays, appeared awkward as hell. The last two, a shorter, sandy-blond man with biceps to rival Steve’s and a tall blond holding a hammer—also with biceps to rival Steve’s—both had small grins on their faces. Those two Bucky pegged as friendlier than the others.
“Go work out,” Steve tossed over his shoulder. “We’re not bothering you.” He leaned back into Bucky, dropping his leg, but pressing his mouth to his ear.
It probably looked like he was nibbling on it or whispering something dirty, continuing what they’d been doing. What it actually was, was Steve leaning in to whisper, “They absolutely killed my boner.”
Bucky bent his head to press it to Steve’s shoulder. He snickered. They’d killed his, too.
“Um, we kind of are bothered,” Bucky just barely heard from Stark’s mouth. It had his head snapping up and turning to glare at the trio who were ‘bothered.’
“You had your chance to be with him. You turned him the fuck down, without even getting to know him. So be bothered all you fucking want. You’re the assholes here.”
His words didn’t make much of an impact on Stark or the redhead, but the curly brunet looked away. Bucky kept glaring, though, until the three wandered away to work out at the other end of the room. The other two stepped forward. They weren’t smiling anymore, but they did appear friendly enough.
“Hey, man, I’m Clint.” The shorter man said. He didn’t hold out his hand and Bucky was glad. He pulled Steve closer to him, wrapping his arm firmly around his waist.
“And I am Thor,” the taller blond added.
“I’m Bucky.” He silently checked in with Steve before adding, “Steve’s soulmate.”
A smile slid onto both their faces. They seemed truly happy for them.
“Man, I’ve been with my soulmate for nearly thirteen years. Being bonded is amazing. Don’t listen to any of them. They all have their own issues.” He looked Steve in the eye. “I’m going to say this once, then we never have to speak of it again. Their issues are their issues. They have nothing to do with you. It’s because of them that they rejected your marks, not you.” He grinned, then, and looked between the two of them. “It seems to me that it worked out better for you anyway. Having someone there for you, away from all this, it’s the best.”
Bucky tightened his grip on Steve’s waist, in a kind of hug. “How do you feel about tattoos?”
Both Clint and Thor grinned. It was Clint who answered. “Man, I’ve always wanted one, but I never could trust anyone enough to get inked. Or I just didn’t like their style.”
“Bucky did mine,” Steve said. He shifted back a little and twisted in Bucky’s grip, just enough to show off his howling wolf.”
“That is beautiful body art,” Thor said.
“Want to get out of here and go look at my art books?” Bucky looked at Clint. “Maybe you’ll find something you like and want. As Steve’s teammate, one who doesn’t appear to be an asshole, I’ll give you a good price at my shop.”
The four of them walked out, talking. A quick glance back showed the other three staring after them.
*****
“You really can’t say no to this mission.”
Steve just barely refrained from rolling his eyes at Nick, who had Maria standing slightly behind him. Nick was annoyed and obviously trying not to show it. Steve could see it, though.
“I can say no to whatever mission I want,” Steve told them.
A muscle ticked in his jaw but Steve only stared him down.
“The SSR gave you the serum and the SSR became SHIELD. You have a duty to—”
“Now, see, that’s where you’re wrong,” Steve interrupted. “The only duty I have is to myself. The only thing I have to do is what I feel is right. The only agreement I had was a handshake with Dr. Erskine. After Erskine died, the SSR scientists took any samples that I would allow them, then wrote me off as a failed experiment. I never signed anything with them, before or after. I never signed anything with the USO or the army, either. I helped because I wanted to and they all accepted it.
“If I had actually been in the army, I would have been court martialed for going AWOL the first time I went out. I would have been brought up on charges for going against Colonel Phillip’s direct order. As it was, I felt it was wrong to leave four hundred of our soldiers to die, so I went and got them out. In the process, I brought back valuable intel, as well as multiple Nazi weapons and even a tank. They accepted it. I kept helping, but I still never signed anything.
“What you’re implying, Nick, is that SHIELD owns me. What you’ve believed since the moment you saw my name on your skin, and realized I was alive, is that I was SHIELD’s asset and nothing more.”
He saw the man begin to open his mouth, probably with some sort of rebuttal, so he repeated the words Fury had spoken in rejection of their potential soulmate bond. “‘If he’s alive, then he’s a SHIELD asset.’” He watched Nick and Maria’s eyes grow wider. “‘As the Director of SHIELD, I cannot have an asset as my soulmate. He’d be taking orders from me.’ Except I don’t, Nick.”
“Were you awake under the ice?” Maria whispered, horrified.
“You really should have thought to ask that from the beginning. The answer’s no to the mission. Find someone else to be a mindless drone you can send out to die. I won’t do it.”
Before he left, he tossed the thin file down on the table, its sparse contents spilling out. He didn’t care. He would not go on what amounted to a suicide mission for any normal person, just because he had the serum and had a slightly higher chance of surviving it. Especially not with so little data and no backup in case things went wrong. Besides that, the mission would take him away for months on end, with no guarantee of any sort of payout if he did come back alive.
“Oh, and Nick?” Steve paused at the door, his hand on the knob. He didn’t bother looking back. “Stop having people follow me. And stop trying to track me with bugs and other surveillance. Pretty soon, I’m going to start retaliating. You don’t want me for an enemy. Maybe you should think long and hard about why Fate tried to match us. And why you were the first.”
Steve then opened the door and stepped out, quietly shutting it behind him. There was no need to slam it. He’d made his point. And even if he hadn’t, SHIELD could do nothing to him for saying no. There was no need for bluster.
Walking out, he headed home to Bucky.
*****
Steve went on a mission with the Avengers and he fought like he always did. He did his best to make sure that everyone came home, and that they came back uninjured. Things were still strained with Stark, Romanov, and Banner, but Steve dealt with it. There wasn’t anything he could do about it. Clint was right. Their issues were with themselves, not with Steve. He wouldn’t be something he wasn’t and he was truly happy with his life. He’d gotten the better end of the deal, in his opinion. He got Bucky as his bonded soulmate. He loved their life together.
He was glad that he’d had that confrontation with Fury and Hill, setting them straight on how they thought they could use him. Now they either provided complete data and gave him missions he agreed with or he walked. It kept him home more, if nothing else.
Clint and Thor sat on either side of him as Steve shifted in his seat. Again. It was a long trip home.
“What’s going on? What’s got you so antsy over here?” Clint asked him softly.
Steve shot a glance over at the rest of the team, but Romanov was flying, Stark was doing something on the jet’s computer, and Banner was sleeping off a Hulk-out.
“I’m disappointed. That we had to go on this mission when we did.”
“Why?” Thor asked. Steve appreciated that he actually tempered his volume so as to not draw the others’ attention.
“I had a surprise for Bucky but I couldn’t show him.”
“You did something? Got him something?” Clint’s eyes sparked with curiosity.
“In a manner of speaking,” Steve replied with a slight grin. Or maybe it was a smirk. It felt like it might be edging towards a smirk. “But we got called out before I could show him.
“Well, what was it?” They both waited expectantly.
“I got a new piercing.” He was definitely edging towards a smirk. He was damn satisfied with what he got and he couldn’t wait to show Bucky.
“New? What did you have already?”
Steve stuck out his tongue to show Clint, then turned so Thor could see. “Wanda did it that first day. The day I went in to ask about my wolf.”
“What is the new piercing?” Thor asked curiously.
“You sure you want to know? Might be a TMI.” Steve checked.
“Well, now I definitely want to know,” Clint declared with a grin.
Steve pulled out his phone. He could tell them, but there was always the chance that at least one of his three rejected soulmates actually were listening. This wasn’t something he wanted to say out loud around them.
The picture he pulled up showed his dick, pierced with a Jacob’s ladder that had nine rungs, with room for another three or four if he really wanted.
“Holy shit!” Clint goggled at the picture.
“Did that hurt?” Thor asked after he got a look at the ladder.
Steve shrugged. “A little initially, but not too bad. I got it all at once, which is not normally advisable, but the serum healed it pretty quickly. Just shy of a day and it was like the two-month healing had already passed.”
“Wanda did it, I presume?” Thor asked.
“Yeah. Not all piercers can do that one, but she’s been trained by an expert and has had a lot of practice.”
“So, Bucky hasn’t seen it yet?” Clint asked. “Does he know about it?”
Steve frowned, that disappointment coming back stronger. “No. It was going to be a surprise. But we got called out and I had to go.”
Thor patted his shoulder. “Well, we’re on our way back now.”
“Yeah. When we’re done debriefing, you’ll be able to go home, shower, and see him.”
“What are the chances that I could skip debrief?” Steve muttered.
Clint winced. “Low. Fury always kicks up a fuss if we don’t debrief after a mission. The fact that we were on an Avengers mission, not one for SHIELD, won’t matter.”
“Well, if it goes on too long, I’m walking out.”
Clint and Thor just laughed.
*****
Steve looked over as the shower door slid to the side.
“A little birdy told me you had a surprise for me,” Bucky murmured as he wrapped his arms around Steve from behind. “Do I get to know what it is?”
Steve hummed. He felt himself begin to react just from his naked soulmate pressing against his back. Even more so when he began sliding his hand up and down Steve’s abs.
“A little lower, gorgeous.”
With his mouth pressed to Steve’s shoulder, Steve felt him grin. Then that hand slowly traveled south.
“You were gone a long time,” Bucky said conversationally. Steve’s breath caught when Bucky paused right before touching his cock.
“Too long,” Steve gasped. “I almost walked out on Fury and the team when debrief kept dragging on. Clint and Thor would have backed me up.”
A rumbling laugh came from his soulmate. Then that hand slipped lower, beginning to wrap around Steve’s hard cock.
Bucky gasped at the first feel of metal. Then he pulled away, to Steve’s groan. But he pulled away to take Steve by the shoulders and turn him around.
“Oh, love,” Bucky purred when he saw what Steve had done. “I don’t know if you got those for you or for me, but I’m going to have so much fun with them.”
With a heated look in his eyes, Bucky dropped to his knees, landing on the padded shower mat put there specifically for that purpose.
They didn’t get out of the shower until long after the water ran cold.
*****
Steve slowed the car to turn onto the gravel road the GPS led them to. Then he drove down the long drive.
“You texted Clint that we’ll be there earlier than we thought, right?” He glanced at Bucky in the front passenger seat, but it was the two voices behind them that answered.
“Yes, Dad,” Wanda and Heather, her soulmate, both said sarcastically at the same time. Then they burst into giggles.
Steve felt amusement rise up inside, even as Bucky grinned at him. “I texted when you asked to the first time, love. He knows we’re close.”
It was five more minutes of driving down the long, gravel road, past green fields and tree-lined streams, before they saw the house. It was nothing like Steve had ever imagined and he took his foot off the gas to coast. Then he stopped and just looked.
Logically, he knew houses like this existed, but they’d been so far from his world, what he’d known growing up or even in this century, that they might as well have not existed. He just stared at it. No one spoke. Steve didn’t know if it was because they were looking at it, the same as him, or if it was because they were kind enough to give him this moment.
Bucky’s hand slipped into his own and he got a squeeze. A quick look had Steve seeing the gentle expression on his soulmate’s face. It was aimed directly at him.
Steve wanted to say something. But they weren’t alone. As much as he loved Wanda and liked Heather, there were just some things that needed to be said in private. So Steve squeezed Bucky’s hand in return, then put his foot back on the gas, heading for Clint’s home.
Before long, they were all getting out, stretching after the long drive.
“We’ll get the bags later,” Steve told Heather when she began to turn for the trunk. She gave him a grateful grin, then gripped Wanda’s hand and pulled her towards the house.
“What?” Bucky asked softly once they were alone.
“You always seem to just know.”
Bucky only waited patiently. It was a gift every time he silently offered that stillness to Steve, whose life was a constant merry-go-round of ups and downs, of training and insanity, of work and home.
“There are times when I wonder what my life would have been like if one of the others hadn’t rejected me, if I’d bonded to Nick or Maria. Or Tony or Nat or Bruce.”
Bucky frowned a bit, his face betraying his worry. He took a step forward. “Steve?”
Not liking that he worried his soulmate, Steve quickly continued. “I don’t think I would have been very happy. I think my life would have been about nothing but the next fight, the next plan, the next way to save the world. Figuring out when we might need to save the world. Worrying that we’d eventually fail. There would have been training and planning and fighting, but probably no downtime. No play. No fun. Everything would have become too serious. I would have become too serious. And hard. I don’t think I would’ve liked the man I turned out to be if that had happened.”
He reached for Bucky’s hand, needing some physical connection the man in front of him. “I’m glad it was you. I’m glad Fate brought me into your shop. I’m so thankful that you are who you are. You live your life with love and kindness and joy and peace. You’re real. It’s all something I desperately needed, even when I didn’t know it. You’re the one I needed. I was being crushed by the weight of duty, and a world I didn’t understand, and you saved me. You saw past Captain America to the man underneath. I’m so glad it was you who accepted the bond. I love you.”
It was the first time either of them had said those words and his heart was beating hard in his chest. But he wasn’t worried that his feelings weren’t reciprocated. Bucky had tears streaming down his cheeks, a hint of a smile on his lips. And love shining fiercely in his eyes.
“Fuck you, you bastard. I’m going to have to walk in there with red fuckin’ eyes and a snotty nose ’cause of you. Waiting ’til now just so I’m a damn mess. Come here, you big asshole.”
Steve grinned and stepped forward, pinning his soulmate against the car, leaning in close.
Instead of going in for a kiss, like he knew Bucky was expecting, Steve brought his mouth to Bucky’s ear instead. “You saw me,” he whispered. “Me, not Cap. From the very beginning. I’ll be forever grateful that Fate matched me with you and that you accepted. I love you so much. And I’ll love you until long after the stars go out.”
Bucky’s arms wrapped around Steve’s neck and he buried his face against his shoulder. Steve’s shirt grew damp so he knew Bucky was still crying.
When Bucky spoke, his voice was so quiet that the only reason Steve caught it was because of his enhanced hearing.
“You make my life better, too, you know. I wasn’t sad or lonely. I was content with my life. I had satisfying work that I love and good friends. I had Wanda and Heather, my family—who are still texting me that they’re looking forward to meeting you on our way back to New York. I was happy enough.” He finally looked up, staring into Steve’s eyes. “But then you walked into my shop. And now my life is infinitely better. You make everything better. Brighter. More. You make each day an adventure, even when all we’re doing is vegging on the couch watching TV. I wake up every morning excited to see you, to be with you. I love you, too.”
Steve wrapped his arms tighter around Bucky. “I know you don’t want to get married,” he said. Then, when Bucky’s expression started to change into one of ‘oh, hell no, please don’t,’ Steve quirked a grin. “I still don’t want to either. But I was hoping maybe I could call you my husband anyway?”
He watched his soulmate consider, then reject. He wasn’t surprised when he came up with a counteroffer. “How about ‘life partner’ or ‘partner’ instead?”
“That works.” Steve couldn’t help but smile. “I just want something more than ‘boyfriend.’”
“I tattooed rings on our fingers literally the day after we met. We were never just boyfriends, love.”
Steve’s smile softened and his heart swelled. “No. We’re mated soulmates.”
*****
“I’m glad you invited them,” Laura said as Clint wrapped his arms around her and their unborn baby in a cuddle. They watched out the open window as Steve and Bucky sat on one side of a picnic blanket while Wanda and Heather sat on the other. The four of them were laughing like family.
They both watched as Bucky stole the chunk of watermelon from Steve’s fork just moments before it reached his mouth. Steve made a disgruntled noise, even as his face was nothing but amused. He went to reach to take it back, but Bucky hopped up and ran off, shoving the watermelon chunk into his mouth, laughing manically.
Steve hopped up and started chasing him. It was obvious it was just for fun because he didn’t actively try to catch him for a bit. And being a supersoldier, he absolutely could have. They were both laughing when Steve finally caught Bucky in his arms. The two girls were giggling, too.
“I’m glad I invited them, too,” Clint murmured into her ear. “Sometimes I think Steve’s not very happy with the Avengers. It’s too weird and tense.”
“He really had three of your teammates as potential soulmates and they all rejected him?”
“Without a thought. And they’re just who I know about. He kept the names covered, then he got a tattoo over everything, so there might be more for all I know. The only name anyone can see now is Bucky’s.”
“Look at them,” Laura said softly. “Bucky’s is the only name that matters.”
She knew very well how it was to be a normal person mated to an Avenger. It was difficult. But it was so worth it because of the peace and happiness she brought Clint. He was so relaxed when he was home. She did that for him. She gave him a home.
She promised herself that, before they left, she’d get Bucky alone and they’d talk. She’d make sure he had her number if he ever had any questions, needed support, or even just if he wanted to talk.
Laura pressed one hand over her love’s, which was resting on her pregnant belly. Her other hand pressed to the small tattoo he’d gotten: an inside joke between them from when they’d met and almost lost each other. It meant so much to her that he’d gotten a symbol of that, of their love.
With Clint’s chin resting on her shoulder, they watched out the window as Steve kissed Bucky like he didn’t have a single care in the world. It did her heart good to see them as happy as her and her soulmate.