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Chapter Text

Chapter 1: Heaven and hell were words to me

October 31^st, 1981, Godric’s Hallow

It was quite the normal night, if a bit chilly. The only abnormal thing was that it was All Hallow’s Eve.

“Hey Lils you heard from Padfoot yet?”

“No, not very surprised though, he’s always late”

“But he promised his godson he would read him Quidditch through the ages before he went to sleep, and Harry is already half asleep”

“Good thing then our little angel is too young to remember a promise. It’s fine love let’s take him to bed and Sirius can read to him tomorrow, we’re going nowhere” Lily laughed and went to get Harry from where he fell asleep on the floor. James rolled his eyes at the reminder.

“Thanks love, I totally forgot that a madman was out to kill our-“

The door opening interrupted James, who turned to the door with a smile.

“Hey Pads, came just in time for bed-“ but as James looked up, his eyes met cold unforgiving eyes.

“Lily! Take Harry and run! I’ll hold him off!” said James as Lily and Harry fled the room and he searched for his wand

“Foolish man, there is nowhere you can run that I will not find you”

James barely had the time to react as a flash of green was hitting him.

Thankfully, he found his wand just in time to counter the killing curse.

“Expelliarmus!” shouted James and red met green.

James couldn’t hold the spell for long against the Dark Lord, but he needed to buy some time for his family.

“Surrender your son and you and your wife will not be harmed”

“You sure are out of your bloody mind to think I would give up my son for you to murder just because of some fucking prophecy!” James yelled back as he broke the spell and shot another one quickly before he hid behind the couch.

However, before he could get back up and fight, he realized he couldn’t move anymore.

“So be it. You will then listen as your family suffer and die. You’ve made your choice Potter” Voldemort said as he left James petrified and went up the stairs.

James wants to yell and scream and fight, but all he could do was let the tears fall as he heard Lily’s distinctive voice yelling from upstairs:

“No stop! Don’t you dare go near him”

“Step aside foolish woman, give up your child and you shall live”

“Please, let him live. Kill me instead!”

“Step aside! I will not repeat myself!”

“No, take me! Leave Harry alone!”

“Avada Kadavara!” and then there was nothing.

James could not hear anything anymore. His family was gone.

Lily Evans. The most beautiful girl he had ever laid eyes on. The one who swept him away from the minute he saw her. The one who owned his heart and his soul. His wife. The love of his life.

And Harry. His sweet sweet son. He was still so young, So full of life. He was the best of James and Lily. His greatest achievement in life.

Now all gone. Gone gone gone.

And he was here, petrified, unable to protect his family.

He didn’t want to live in a world without his family. Without Lily and Harry.

After what felt like hours, James heard footsteps again.

“Merlin, James! Lily! What the hell happened here! Where are you?”

It was Sirius. He was finally here, but all too late.

His best friend walked through the front door, but James couldn’t yell. James couldn’t even move or open his eyes. He could feel Sirius coming closer to him and he heard an audible gasp:

“Prongs? Prongs no no no. Please wake up c’mon you can’t leave me. You can’t. James please. Please please wake up!” He heard Sirius cry and beg, and shake him, but didn’t notice that James was still breathing.

“Merlin, Lily! Harry!” Sirius yelled as he got up and searched the rest of the house.

A few seconds later, he heard large footsteps once again making their way into the house.

“Bloody hell, ‘tis awful” said a voice that James identified as Rubeus Hagrid.

What the hell was Hagrid doing here? Was Dumbledore coming? Was he notified the Fiddelus charm was broken?

His chain of thought was broken with baby cries.

Baby cries?

Harry?

Harry was alive?

“Sirius! Dumbledore sent me to get ‘arry! Are James and Lily really dead?”

No response came from Sirius for a while.

“Sirius, mind givin me ‘arry? ‘m supposed to bring ‘im back to Dumbledore-“

“It’s Pettigrew! It’s fucking Peter Pettigrew! He betrayed James and Lily! The fucking rat! I’m going to kill him!” and then he heard Sirius give Harry to Hagrid and leave.

“Oh Harry, don’t wa worry. You’re gonna be takin care of” were the last words James heard before he was left all alone.

His mind was in shambles.

Pettigrew had betrayed them. Peter Pettigrew. The man who he had known for most of life, even longer than Sirius. The boy he had met when they were six and Peter’s family had moved into their neighbor. That Peter.

He truly couldn’t believe it.

They weren’t as close as they were at Hogwarts, but Peter was there when Lily and James got married and Harry was born.

They even trusted him to be their secret keeper instead of Sirius, thinking that they were being smart.

Peter Pettigrew was the reason his family is ruined.

Lily was dead. Harry was miraculously alive. How?

Where did Voldemort even go?

After what felt like hours, James could finally move.

The first thing he did was send a patronus to Dumbledore. He needed to see his son with his own eyes.

“I’m alive. Where is Harry?” was all he could say. His stag nuzzled at him and looked like he was about to cry, but went off anyway.

James then went up to the nursery to be met with his wife’s dead body.

Her hair was slayed out underneath her, just as red and fiery as ever.

Her green eyes were still open, looking up into the abyss.

She still had her wand clutched into her hand, ready to defend her son even after death.

He held her body as he cried and cried.

She still smelt like oranges and summer and love. So much love.

“My love, my sweetheart. I’m sorry. I’m so very sorry. I let you down. I let Harry down. I couldn’t protect you. I couldn’t protect our family. I love you so much.”

This is where Albus Dumbledore found him a while later.

“James, you’re alive. How?”

James finally let go of his wife, closed her eyes and let her rest.

“Instead of simply killing me, he petrified me and made me hear everything. Where is Harry? I heard him. He’s still alive.”

“Harry is indeed still alive. Your son somehow defeated the Dark Lord. When Voldemort killed Lily and cast the killing curse on Harry, it rebounded and killed him, not Harry.” Dumbledore explained.

“How is that even possible? No one can survive the killing curse”

“I do not know for certain. However, I believe it is Lily’s doing. Her love for Harry protected him, even after death.”

James didn’t know what to reply to that.

Of course, Lily would save Harry. She was the brightest witch James ever knew, and the most loving person and mother he could think of.

“You still haven’t answered me. Where is Harry? I want to see my son. I need to see him.”

“We all thought you were dead, so Harry was put with his closest living relatives”

“Then he’s with Sirius and Remus? Why didn’t you just say that?”

Dumbledore paused for a minute before responding.

“James, I’m sure you know, Sirius was your secret keeper, so the fact that Voldemort attacked your safe house means- “

“Sirius wasn’t our secret keeper, we changed it last minute to Peter Pettigrew”

Dumbledore looked shocked, but he continued:

“Well, an hour ago, Sirius confronted Peter on a muggle street, where bystanders heard Mr. Pettigrew shout out that it was Sirius who betrayed the Potters, and then seemingly Sirius went mad and caused a huge explosion killing twelve Muggles and Peter Pettigrew. Sirius is now in the ministry’s hold waiting to be sent to Azkaban without trial”

“What the hell? Sirius would never do that! You have to know that! I just told you it wasn’t Sirius who betrayed us, it was Peter! This has to be a ploy by Peter so he could get away! You have to go defend Sirius!”

“It isn’t that simple James. The ministry still thinks you’re dead, and there are a lot of witnesses that testified seeing Sirius go mad. And Sirius is the only one who came out of the explosion alive.”

“Well at least let him have a trial! I can’t lose my brother! I already lost the love of my life!”

“I’ll do everything in my power James. Now, I have put Harry with Lily’s sister, Petunia. It seemed like the most logical solution”

“Petunia? Why her? Literally anyone else would be better! She hates everything regarding magic, and that includes her own nephew! She didn’t even come to our wedding.”

“There wasn’t anyone else at the time, you must understand James. I wanted to keep Harry out of the spotlight. People are calling him the boy who lived, the chosen one. He wouldn’t be safe in the wizarding world with death eaters still on the loose, even if Voldemort is dead.”

“Well Harry isn’t alone. He has me. And I’m going to go get my son from that awful woman”

“Of course, James, no one is stopping you. I do advice you however to not come back here, until at least the aurors process the scene and determine if it is still livable here after all the dark magic cast here. Do you have any alternative accommodations?”

“We could go to Sirius and Remus’ place for now until everything with Sirius gets resolved”

Dumbledore nodded at that and James took it as a sign to grab his wand and apparate to 4 Privet Drive, Little Whinging, Surrey.

The last time he was there was with Lily who wanted to try to make amends with her sister and invite her to their small wedding. Petunia had seen Lily and James and shut the door in their faces. That was three years ago.

It had been about six hours since the attack, and the sun was now rising on the horizon.

James knocked on the door to the most ordinary home he had ever seen.

A few seconds later, his eyes met Petunia Evans, now Dudley, looking back at him in shock.

“Aren’t you dead? Where is my sister?”

“Lily passed away in an attack on our home last night, I was injured during the attack and thought dead. That’s why Harry was placed with you. I’m here to take him now”

Petunia looked even more shocked, then sad, then angry.

“I always knew you would be the reason she died, you and your freakish world. She should have never gone to that godawful school and stayed here. Then she would be alive and happy right now away from your war.”

And James didn’t have the energy to fight back. In fact, he agreed.

He wishes Lily Evans never got her Hogwarts’ letter. He wishes he had never met her if it meant she was still breathing, even if he would never have met the love of his life.

“Can I please have my son now?” was the only reply he could muster back, to which Petunia turned her nose and went back into the house.

A minute later, she came back, hands full of a blanket wrapped around his son.

His son. His Harry.

He was really alive.

He was sleeping peacefully, unaware that their lives had forever changed.

However, the change was clear from the lighting bolt forever engraved into his son’s forehead.

Chapter Text

Chapter 2: Is that the kinda way to face the burning heat?

1979, Crystal Cave, unknown location

Regulus Black was a lot of things. Lucky was not one of them.

His whole life, he had always been second.

His parents put Sirius first. Sirius put James Potter first. Barty put Evan first. Even the Dark Lord underestimated his abilities.

Regulus found he was very perceptive for this very reason. He could see someone and know exactly what they thought, or look at a situation and know exactly how to act accordingly.

People thought he was weak, naïve and stupid for joining the Dark Lord, for not fighting the mark the way his brother did.

People also tend to forget that Regulus Black was 16 when he was told he was getting the mark. No questions asked.

His parents needed the Dark Lord’s favor, and Regulus was their only solution. And he had no say in it.

The day he got his mark was the day Regulus also decided he would die very soon.

He never lived a happy life after 10, after the day his brother left for Hogwarts and left him all alone. When he came back, all he could talk about was James Potter.

The day Regulus was sorted into Slytherin sealed the deal.

He wasn’t brave and caring like his brother. He was cunning and calculating and cold and everything Sirius couldn’t stand. And Sirius made that clear when he left him all alone forever when he was fourteen.

Regulus had nowhere to run. So, he took the mark and counted the days till his death.

Which brought him here, to this dark cold cave.

In the two years since he became a death eater, Voldemort gave him strictly academic missions: making certain potions or doing some research to improve dark spells and curses. He never went on the killing sprees, and he thanked whatever entity that was looking out for him.

A week ago, the Dark Lord asked to borrow Kreacher for a mission, and asked is an exaggeration. The Dark Lord didn’t ask. He took and took and took.

When his elf had come back, he was on the brink of death.

Upon questioning, Regulus found out about the Dark Lord’s biggest secret: Horcruxes.

They were an extremely dark kind of magic, one that Regulus would never dream to mess with, but he still read up about it once in a book from one of his ancestors.

Making a horcrux was as good as selling your soul to the devil, if a devil exists. It was a section of magic no one dared to dabble in. Voldemort was the exception, and he had already made one.

Even if defeated, the Dark Lord would rise again, and no one knew that except for him.

Regulus wasn’t brave or stupid. He wasn’t a Gryffindor.

Yet, he still decided that destroying that Horcrux would be the last thing he ever did before he died.

The cave was cold and dark as he entered it, and he felt as if someone was watching him.

Kreacher was there with him, to guide him to where to locket would be.

When they reached the bowl full of poison, Regulus didn’t hesitate to start drinking and drinking and drinking.

The pain he felt matched that of the Cruciatus Curse his parents had subjected him to before, but Kreacher kept on feeding him the potion as he was ordered to do.

“Please, please stop, I don’t want this. I can’t do this. I want t go home” he cried and cried and cried.

His head tried to soothe him with memories of the past, of him and Sirius playing in the snow when they were younger, of Sirius telling him stories about Hogwarts, of him playing Quidditch with Barty and feeling free in the air, of late night at Hogwarts with Barty and Evan and Dorcas and Pandora before he took the mark.

“It’s done Master Regulus; you can rest now” Kreacher said but Regulus couldn’t take it anymore. He just wanted it to be quiet. He wanted to be gone.

Kreacher disappeared as ordered before, and Regulus laid on the cold hard stone.

Suddenly, he was grabbed by the leg and pulled into the water.

Inferni. The water was full of the undead, most definitely as a precaution set up by the Dark Lord.

Regulus wasn’t scared. He was happy he would finally be at peace. He would finally rest. He welcomed death with open arms.

Death however did not welcome him back.

He felt his lungs being filled with air again as he opened his eyes and saw Kreacher looking at him with sad eyes.

“Master! You’re alive!”

But Regulus was angry.

“Why did you save me? I did not order you to save me!”

“You didn’t order me not to either. I got the locket far away from here, like you requested, put the fake one in the bowl and filled it with the same poison before I came back with the anti-poison and pulled you out of that water and gave it to you”

“Merlin Kreacher, couldn’t you just let me die in peace?”

Kreacher didn’t reply, but he did frown at Regulus as if the idea of him dying was the most awful thing he could have proposed.

What was Regulus supposed to do now? He couldn’t go back to his old life, he had a horcrux to destroy with no idea how to actually do it and he was all alone.

He could only think of one person he could go to. He only hoped this person would listen to him.

“Kreacher, bring me the locket. I need to go destroy it”

His house-elf only nodded and disappeared only to reappear a minute later, green locket in hand.

“Be careful Master, the locket whispers dark things”

Regulus took the locket and immediately understood what Kreacher meant.

He couldn’t wait to be rid of it.

He quickly apparated to his favorite place, one where he had the happiest memories of his life. A place he never thought he would see again.

Hogwarts.

It hadn’t changed one bit since he last saw it a few months back when he graduated.

He didn’t let himself reminisce too much as he moved into the grounds and up the castle. He was quick to not let anyone see him. He was still technically a death eater.

As he reached the headmaster’s office, he didn’t have the password, but he knew Albus Dumbledore would know he was there.

Soon, the Gargoyle opened revealing a staircase.

“Mr. Black, I can honestly say I am surprised to see you here. How may I be of service?” Dumbledore greeted him with a smile betrayed by his wary eyes.

“I do not know where to begin headmaster, but I know you might be the only person who could help me with this problem”

“What is this problem then?”

Regulus didn’t say anything else and only threw the locket at the headmaster’s desk.

For a minute, Dumbledore didn’t say anything and only looked at the object in confusion, until suddenly his eyes widened.

“Mr. Black, how did you come to be in possession of such a dark piece of magic? Do you even realize what this is?”

“It’s a horcrux, more specifically Lord Voldemort’s Horcrux. How it came into my possession is irrelevant. I must destroy it but I do not know how”

“I must confess it is the first time I’ve come across such an object. I’ve only read about it in certain books.”

“So, you have no idea how to destroy it?”

“I have some theories; we can try them out. But before, I suppose you coming here means you defected, correct?”

“Yes, before long the Dark Lord will detect my absence. I didn’t think I would make it alive while retrieving the locket, so I instructed my house elf to inform my parents I took my own life and that my body would be at the bottom of the ocean to avoid suspicion.”

“Very well, if you need help hiding after we destroy the locket, I am gladly offering my help. What you did today might just save the wizarding world when it comes to it. Thank you, my boy, truly. You are very brave”

Regulus didn’t know what to say to that. He wasn’t brave. He only did this because he had to. He could never let a monster like Voldemort be immortal and impossible to kill.

“Now, one method I thought of is Fiendfyre, for you can only destroy a dark object with an equally dark spell.”

“It could work, but we could need to do it far away from here. Fiendfyre is a dangerous spell that’s incredibly hard to control, even for someone like you”

“I agree, I have just the spot for this. I suppose you wish to be done with this now?”

Regulus quickly agreed and the headmaster put out his hand.

“I will side-apparate you to the location. It will be must faster than preparing a portkey”

Regulus hesitates. He didn’t trust Dumbledore. Regulus was a death eater and Dumbledore was the head of the Order of the Phoenix. They were on polar opposites in this war.

But he had no choice. The minute he had walked into that cave, he had made his decision to never go back to the dark side. He had to follow through now.

He reluctantly took the older man’s hand, and was suddenly swept away.

When he opened his eyes, he found himself in the middle of a desert.

“Where are we?”

“We are in the Sahara Desert, far away from any civilizations. I will however cast some wards so the fire doesn’t spread too far away”

Regulus nodded and observed the place as Dumbledore got to work.

There truly was nothing. It was complete and absolute silence.

It was calming, in a way. Regulus always liked the silence.

When he was still at Hogwarts, he would go up to the Astronomy tower quite often to be alone, look at the stars and enjoy the calming atmosphere that came with the night.

“It’s all set up. Do you wish to cast the spell with me?” asked the headmaster and Regulus quickly nodded. Of course he wanted to destroy the bloody locket, he was the one who found it in the first place.

Dumbledore put down the locket on the sand and they both casted together: “Fiendfyre!”

A huge ball of fire erupted from both their wands and caught on the locket.

Piercing screams shot out of it, as the soul inside the locket was burning and dying.

Regulus couldn’t even feel a bit sad about it. This was after all a piece of the Dark Lord’s soul.

A few minutes later, the fire kept on but the screams finally stopped.

“Do you think it’s destroyed then?”

“Only one way to find out Mr. Black” replied Dumbledore as he started to take down the fire.

Once the fire was out, they both carefully approached the locket and Regulus took it in his hand.

The locket was open, and black ooze was coming out it.

“It’s gone, the horcrux is gone. I can feel it”

“Indeed, it is Mr. Black”

His mission was over. And now Regulus didn’t know what he would do.

“Headmaster, do you mind if I take you up on that offer? I do not know where to hide until the Dark Lord is taken down, and I do not wish for anyone to find out I’m alive.”

Dumbledore only nodded and smiled.

Regulus Black was not fine. But he had a feeling he would be. After all, he was very much aware that by cheating death, he had forever changed his destiny.

Chapter Text

Chapter 3: Don’t let it break your heart

31^st July, 1983, Appleby, North Lincolnshire, England

“Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday dear Harry! Happy birthday to you! Now c’mon love blow your candles!” James said as he watched his now 3-year-old-son blow his candles as him and his best friend clapped cheerily.

“Did you make a wish Harry?” asked Remus, standing right next to James

“Yes, uncle Moony! But I can’t tell you what it is or it won’t come true! That’s what daddy said!” Harry replied, smiling.

"Of course, aren’t you the smartest 3-year-old I’ve ever seen!” said Remus as he lifted Harry up in the air and spun him around, only prompting Harry to giggle.

“Moony! I’m the only 3-year-old you see!”

James looked at his family and smiled faintly.

It had been almost 2 years since the day his life was ruined forever. Or so he thought.

Following the attack, James and Harry moved in with Remus, who was just as affected as them by that horrid day. After all, Remus had also lost the love of his life.

Sirius Black currently resided in a cell in Azkaban, after he was found guilty for the death of 12 muggles and one Peter Pettigrew.

Dumbledore did manage to get Sirius a trial in which he was found innocent of betraying the Potters and being a death eater, but there was incriminating evidence that he had in fact killed 13 people when seeking revenge against Pettigrew.

James and Remus never got to see Sirius before he was incarcerated. The trial had been a private one to avoid the public circus it would become, especially with everyone’s astonishment with Harry, who they nicknamed ‘the boy who lived’.

Both James and Remus didn’t know how to feel about Sirius. They loved him, he was family. But what he did was incredibly reckless and cruel. Killing muggles could never be justifiable, even by revenge. However, they both also knew they had to hear him out and not judge based on the ministry's ruling.

And so, so far, they hadn’t visited him in Azkaban in the last two years. They still felt angry and betrayed and they didn’t know if the man there was still their Padfoot or someone else, someone consumed by revenge.

In the months that had followed the end of the wizarding war, James and Remus had moved to Potter manor seeking some familiarity, but they were forced to move out soon after because of the fanatics that would try to sneak into his house to see his son, or the cursed letters he would get from previous supporters of the Dark lord threatening to slowly torture and kill Harry.

And so, James had made the decision to leave the old Potter manor and instead settle into a house far away from anyone who knew him to protect his son and to be able to raise him away from the public’s attention.

That’s how they ended up in Appleby, a wizarding town in North Lincolnshire.

It had been an almost peaceful year since then.

“Dada, can I please open my presents now?” Harry looked up at him with his green eyes and a slight pout, and James could never say no to his son.

“Of course, love, let’s open them up and then we can eat some cake”

Harry quickly moved to the living room where all his gifts were stationed on the coffee table, dragging his father with him.

Harry had gotten some new picture books, as well as coloring books and pens from Remus, which he was instantly happy with and begged Remus to read to him later. And of course, in a totally Moony fashion, he had also gotten him some chocolate that James would definitely hide.

James had gotten him a new broom, bigger than the one he had gotten the year before. His son was well on his way to becoming a seeker. He was a quidditch genius even at three.

James had also gotten him some new muggle clothes, as well as some robes and some boots since Harry was growing faster than James could catch up.

Toys were a must as well, and Harry had gotten obsessed with building with blocks in the last few months.

Some might think Harry was spoiled a bit too much, but James was only making up for the lack of family that Harry didn’t have.

“Thank you, Dada, Thank you Moony. I love you”

“We love you too sweetheart” Remus replied, his eyes tearing up.

Remus had truly lost everything that night. His love, his best friend, his family, the life he had wanted for himself. But at the very least, he had this. He could not imagine where he would be now if it weren’t for Harry and James.

“Oh Harry, you still one gift. Is that from you Moony?” James wondered, seeing one smaller box in the corner of the room.

Remus however looked confused.

“I thought that was from you James? It came in this morning in owl post with your name on it. I thought you had done some last-minute shopping”

James was really confused. No one knew where they lived for this particular reason. And all their friends were either dead, imprisoned or out of the country.

Remus carefully approached the box and cast some detection spells to see if it was cursed.

“It’s all good James, do you want me to throw it away or do you want to open it?”

James was about to just throw it away. It was most likely a silly prank or a wrong owl post.

But what if it wasn’t? James was intrigued to see what was inside. After all, there was no harm in just checking.

He reached for the box, and as soon as he had it in his hands, he could tell it wasn’t cheap.

The box was a rich green adorned with gold and silver lines all across, with a little bow holding it closed. As he undid the bow, the box opened revealing a simple bracelet and a note.

The bracelet was a beautiful thing. It was gold with some small runed engraved into it. It was fitted for a small hand, so definitely for Harry.

James handed the bracelet to Remus who immediately casted some spells and tried to figure out what the runes meant while James moved on to the note. On it was an elegant handwriting and a short paragraph.

“Happy birthday Harry. I might not know you yet but I wish you to be happy and loved for the rest of your life. The bracelet has a protective charm which will protect you from any harm. I hope you wear it well. Yours, R.A.B”

R.A.B? Who the hell was that?

The letter was very mysterious. How did this person even know where they lived? Why would they send a gift if they didn’t know Harry? And what did they mean by ‘yet’?

Remus met his questioning gaze and held his hand out, to which James handed the note.

“Do you have any idea who it could be?” James asked and Remus shook his head.

“No clue Prongs. If you want, I can research it though?”

“I doubt you’ll find anything. Clearly this person doesn’t want to be found. Is the bracelet really a protective charm?”

“Yeah, it’s clearly handmade. The runes inside are basic protective runes, nothing really special about them. What do you want to do with it?”

James thought it through. Would it be so bad to give it to his son?

Sure, he didn’t like the idea that the bracelet’s origin is unknown, but the person behind it clearly had good intentions, and James always wanted his son to be protected, especially in his absence.

“It’s a gift for Harry, so the only logical thing to do here is give it to him to wear. It’s only a protective bracelet”

Remus nodded at his words and gave him back the bracelet, which he then put on his son’s hand.

“Is this from you too, dada?” Harry asked curiously, playing with the piece of jewelry that now adorned his right wrist.

“No love, it was a gift from someone who wants you protected. I don’t know who but this little bracelet will keep you from harm if I am not there, so don’t take it off, ever. Got it Harry?”

“Is it mama? Did she send it for my birthday?” Harry asked and James was surprised.

Harry knew who his mum was, Remus and James made sure of it. They would always keep her legacy alive. They told him stories of her all the time, but that she loved him so very much she had to leave to protect him.

Harry didn’t really understand what they meant, but he accepted that answer nevertheless and always asked to know more and more about Lily.

As much as James wanted to lie to his son and tell him this gift was from his mum to make him feel better, he never wanted to lie to his son. And he couldn’t lie to himself either. Lily was gone.

“No Harry, this one isn’t from your mum. She is here though, watching over you like she always does.”

Harry frowned at the answer and his eyes started to tear up, so did James’.

“Oh, Harry love, don’t be sad. Just because your mum didn’t send you a gift doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you. She does, so very much. She loved you so much she saved your life so you could be here with us today.” Remus intervened, lowering himself to look Harry in the eyes. Harry however didn’t look convinced.

“You know you remind me so much of her. You have the same eyes, the same smile when you’re happy, the same pout when you’re sad. You love your tea just like she did, and she was the one who always told me chocolate fixes everything.” Remus continued, shocking on his tears as he recalled all the happy memories he had with his best friend.

“Most importantly Harry, you’re both so loving and caring. And I love you Harry, just like she does. She will always love you Harry, even if she isn’t here, you carry her with you in your heart.”

The little family sat and cried together. Life was better, they were better. But they still carried in their hearts the pain those memories brought back.

“Dada, Moony, can we go visit her today? I know we only go on special days, but can we go today too? Please?” Harry asked after he had calmed down.

“Of course, Harry, that’s a wonderful idea. We can bring her some flowers and even have a little picnic with her and you can tell her all about your day.” James replied, feeling relieved his son was doing better.

And so, the family of three left their home and apparated to the graveyard near Godric’s Hallow, where Lily Evans Potter’s grave was waiting to greet them.

Chapter Text

Chapter 4: Anywhere you go, you don’t need a reason

1983, Hogwarts

Regulus never expected to be back at Hogwarts so many times after he had graduated.

The first time was in 1979 after he defected and came to Dumbledore for help.

The second time was in 1981, after the war had ended. At that point, he had already spent two years in hiding in a house that was under the Fiddelus charm that only he and Dumbledore knew of. The old man made sure no one knew he was alive, even his own brother.

In fact, Sirius was the reason he had come to Hogwarts that second time. Regulus had read that day’s Daily Prophet and to say he was shocked was an understatement.

The Dark Lord was apparently dead, killed at the hands of a one-year-old child. That child was Harry Potter, James and Lily Potter’s son. The boy’s mother was dead as well.

Worst of all, his own brother was behind the attack at the Potter’s house. Sirius had apparently betrayed his best friends and led Voldemort straight to their door.

The fact that Sirius Black had betrayed the Potters was much more surprising to Regulus than the fact that the Dark Lord had been defeated in such an odd way.

His brother was a lot of things, but he would never have betrayed his friends.

Regulus had come to Hogwarts that day to say the same exact thing to Dumbledore, who apparently already knew.

Regulus was indeed right. His brother was loyal, maybe a bit too loyal, because Sirius had apparently gone mad because of the attack and killed 13 people, and was going to Azkaban for his crimes.

Regulus and Sirius always had a very complicated relationship and they hadn’t talked for years, but Regulus couldn’t help the despair he felt for his brother.

After the war ended, Regulus had always imagined he would reunite with his brother and maybe try and repair their relationship. But Regulus would never be able to do that now.

And so, he had nothing holding him back. No family, no friends, no one even knew he was alive, and he preferred to keep it that way. He decided for once in his life to just live, to just let go of his past, to not care about his family or their expectations of him, to not feel sorry for being himself.

For two years, Regulus travelled the whole of Europe. He spent weeks in the French countryside living on a farm and drinking wine for breakfast. Then he made his way through the warm Spanish towns on the Costa del Sol, enjoying the sunny beaches and getting sunburnt for the first time in his life.

He settled for a while in Venice, taking inspiration from the rich culture to write about anything and everything. It was the first time he ever felt so free in his writings, and truly considered them to be art and not just words on a paper.

By the time summer rolled around again, he left Italy for Greece where he became obsessed with Greek mythology. All the books on the matter were muggle but so very interesting. The stories they told were captivating and some were even relatable to his own experiences. He truly felt connected with the story of Icarus, who forgot his father’s warnings and flew too close to the sun, burning his wings and sending him to drown in the sea.

Regulus had spent his entire life flying too close to the sun. He was always one step away from death, and he almost did drown. All his life, he had turned a blind eye to what was happening around him. He had ignored his brother’s warnings and lost Sirius in the process. He lost his friends to a war he never wanted to be a part of.

Regulus swore he would never disregard another warning sign ever again, and that he would truly live for once and not live every day as if it was his last.

During his travels, Regulus refused to get attached to anyone. He would have the casual fling or two, but he didn’t want to make any friends. He didn’t feel as though he deserved the kindness of anyone who didn’t know of his past doings and the fact that he was a death eater.

For this reason, he usually stuck around the muggle side of countries, and only slept with muggles who thought he had a rather odd-looking snake tattoo.

Regulus hadn’t planned to go back home any time soon, but an owl from Dumbledore prompted him to come for a meeting at Hogwarts, which tickled his curiosity. What could the headmaster even want from him?

That’s how he had ended up at the headmaster’s office this lovely summer afternoon.

“Mr. Black, it is pleasing to see you in such good health. I can see travelling has treated you well” Dumbledore said as soon as Regulus stepped into the office and shook his hand.

“Yes, I am quite enjoying the peaceful and quiet life I have built for myself these last couple of years. Your owl last week disrupted that peace headmaster” Regulus replied pointedly and Dumbledore laughed.

“Jumping straight to the point as always, Mr. Black. Well then, I have called you here today to offer you a teaching position here at Hogwarts. You would start as soon as next fall and we would of course provide you with your own chambers and any other necessities you might need”

A teaching position? At Hogwarts? Had Dumbledore finally gone mad?

“You can’t be serious, I’m a death eater. I am in no position to be a professor in a school full of children”

“I am quite serious. You are my first choice for this job Regulus. You have a genuine sense of character, and you would make an excellent professor. You are strict and direct but also compassionate when you need to be. I do not consider you a death eater. That mark on your hand only signifies your willingness to do the right thing and be brave even in the worst of times.” Dumbledore’s eyes twinkled as he said that, as if he truly meant it.

Regulus was far from being redeemed for all the choices he made, and he would spend every day of his life trying to make up for it.

“I assume Professor Slughorn is ready to retire then?”

“He is, but I already have someone to fill in that position. While you are quite remarkable in Potions Regulus, I would like you to fill in the Astronomy position. I hear you are quite passionate about it.”

“What about professor Sinistra? Has she retired?”

“She hasn’t retired from teaching, but she is moving to America and therefore cannot teach here anymore. She was the first one to suggest you as the new professor, as she told me you were top of the class in her subject and even took got an Outstanding in the NEWTS, but she thought you were dead. Fortunately, you are very much alive”

“That I am” Regulus replied curtly and set his mind into truly thinking of it.

Of all the career paths he thought of, teaching wasn’t one that really inspired him. He thought if he were to ever teach, it would be Potions. Astronomy was a whole other thing.

The subject had always hit a bit too close to home. The Black family was forever intertwined with the stars. His ancestors had started the tradition of naming the family after stars believing they were superior from anyone around them, far away from normalcy just like the stars are deep in the sky.

Regulus was always told his name was a great one, for his star was the brightest in the Leo constellation. However, he never felt as though he was the brightest in life.

His brother was the first-born of the family and the heir for the first fourteen years of his life, and he acted like it. Sirius always shone so very bright. He was brave and strong and everything Regulus wasn’t and could never be. But Regulus was never jealous. He was quite content being the spare, always forgotten and underestimated.

Then Sirius ran away and left behind a life Regulus was forced to assume.

He definitely had a love-hate relationship with astronomy just like the one he had with Sirius, but maybe he could repair the damage he had from one of them.

“Before you decide anything Regulus, I also want you to think of the implications accepting this job would bring. You would be forced to reveal you are alive to the wizarding world and you would might receive backlash because of who people think you are and the mark on your hand. I can however guarantee to deal with the ministry on your behalf and you would not be held responsible for anything that happened during the war.” Dumbledore explained slowly and Regulus felt a headache brewing.

He had forgotten about the social aspect of this job. He would have to live in the castle with everyone else, and therefore teachers and students alike would tell the world he is alive and well.

Regulus had been trying for two years to escape his past by travelling far away, but he knew he would eventually have to face the consequences of his own actions.

“I understand the consequences if I decide to take the job. Could I have a couple of days to decide? I must sort some things out before I decide if I want to live here again permanently”

“Of course. If you would like to see your brother, I can arrange-”

“No, I don’t want to see him, and I am certain he doesn’t want to see me either”

“I’m sure he would like to see a familiar face after all these years. You must realize what Azkaban is like, and Sirius is not a bad man, he made one terrible mistake that is costing him his life. Even James and Remus haven’t been to see him”

“Why wouldn’t Potter and Lupin visit? They’re all tied at the hip. It was because of the attack at the Potter’s house that my brother is even in prison”

“That’s true. But James and Remus are both grieving their loved ones and aren’t ready to face Sirius just yet. They are also raising a child, and that alone is a difficult job without adding the fact that that boy defeated the darkest wizard that ever lived and survived it. The Potters had to move several times to make sure Harry was safe.” Dumbledore explained and Regulus felt sad for the little boy.

He didn’t know him and would probably never meet him, but having such huge expectations and fame put on you before you even turn two would be impossible to manage.

When he was younger, there was no one Regulus Black hated more than James Potter and Remus Lupin.

Sirius had so quickly replaced him in only a year with his new Gryffindor friends and forgotten all about him. Even when Regulus came to Hogwarts, Sirius barely looked is way, always too busy pulling pranks with Potter and being dragged around by Lupin.

As Regulus grew up, he realized he didn’t actually hate Potter and Lupin. They had done no wrong towards him. He hated the idea that they represented. He hated that they were everything he could never be to his brother.

Now though, all he felt for them was compassion. He could relate to their experience to a certain level; they had lost their lives in the war just like he did, only they also had to protect the life of someone they loved more than anything. Regulus couldn’t relate to that.

“I’ll be owling you my response later this week, headmaster. Thank you again for this opportunity” Regulus finally said and shook Dumbledore’s hand before he walked out.

He would take this job and rebuild his life in two days.

Today though, he was going birthday shopping. After all, the whole wizarding world knew that the boy who lived would soon turn three, but no one knew where he was.

Regulus however would find out and he was determined to at least help protect the child who was the reason he had this second chance.

Chapter Text

Chapter 5: From the Start

November 1986, Potter and Lupin Household

“James, we really must get going if we don’t want to be late” Remus said to him from the living room as he was putting on his shoes

“We’re all done here, don’t worry Moony. You go ahead I’ll drop off Harry and I’ll see you for lunch” James replied quickly from the kitchen as he urged Harry to finish up his cereal so they could get going.

“Alright Prongs. Have a good day at school Harry, don’t cause too much trouble” Remus quickly said and flooed to the ministry.

“C’mon love, I still have to drop you off before I go to work, go put on a coat” James turned to Harry who nodded his head and went off.

Meanwhile, James made sure he had everything he needed: his ministry badge, his wand, his files and of course his auror robes.

Today was going to be a long day. He had to follow up on some stolen dark artifacts.

Harry showed up again all ready, and they apparated close to Harry’s muggle school. They always made sure they didn’t apparate too close or too far away.

James walked the rest of the distance with his six-year-old son. It had now been two years since James took the decision to enroll Harry in a muggle primary school and to pursue a career for himself as an auror.

Even before they had Harry, Lily always insisted she wanted her children to have the same education she did before Hogwarts. James agreed, and also thought it would be a great opportunity for Harry to interact with people his age and even make friends.

So far, Harry absolutely loved it, but was a bit sad he couldn’t share the magic aspect of his life with his friends. James and Remus had tried explaining to him over and over how important it was he never mentions magic in front of muggle, but even now Harry didn’t understand why it made any difference, and why he was different from everyone around him.

Harry often asked questions about the wizarding world, about magic.

They told him about Hogwarts and how he would go there when he turns eleven. They told him about their years there, trying to leave out Sirius and Peter from the stories but often failing and leaving Harry very confused.

Harry also asked why he hadn’t ever met any other wizard, why they never went out in the wizarding world.

James and Remus had decided to tell Harry about Voldemort when he got his Hogwarts letter, but as Harry grew up and became more aware and had even more questions, it all became more complicated.

For now, though, they had it under control.

As Harry waved and went into the school smiling, James turned back and quickly apparated to the ministry. This time of day, it was buzzing with people left and right.

He quickly made his way to the second level to report to the head auror and get the case file.

“Good morning, James. Right on time” said Rufus Scrimgeour as James went into his office.

“Morning sir, I hear you have a case for me?”

“Yes. Unfortunately, some dark artifacts have been reported stolen from Borgin and Burkes and I need to track them down before someone can cause some serious harm with them”

James nodded and asked: “What do we know about the artifacts?”

“When doing inventory two days, the shop noticed that some newer artifacts they acquired were missing. They didn’t notice right away because the objects are quite small. Supposedly, it’s all cursed jewelry hidden in a cursed box that will put a blood curse on the person that tries to open it up without the key.”

“Merlin, who would want that”

“Someone who wishes to inflict some serious harm. The shop only acquired these artifacts a week before they went missing, so it is entirely possible that the previous owner might know who is aware of this box’s existence and who would want it. I want you to go to Hogwarts and talk to him and find out more. Report to me your findings.” Scrimgeour finished and turned back to the files on his desk, clearly dismissing James.

As he walked to his cubicle, James finally processed what the head auror had said.

Hogwarts? He had to go to Hogwarts?

Why would the person who owned this dark artifact be at Hogwarts?

Was it a student? No way, no student would have access to something so dark and it was November, there was no way anyone sneaked out to Diagon Alley to sell anything.

It was a teacher then. Who though? Were there any new professors since James graduated?

Since the end of the war, James hadn’t kept in touch at all with the wizarding world. Even after he had become an auror, the only person he spent time with outside of work was Remus.

It was weird talking to anyone else. As soon as someone saw him and recognized he was James Potter and his son was Harry Potter, the boy who lived, all they cared about was the image of the hero they had in their heads.

It was for this particular reason James fought hard to keep himself and his family out of the wizarding world. He wasn’t a hero, neither was Harry.

He knew eventually Harry would have to face the music as he went to Hogwarts, but he hoped to at least keep Harry from it for now and provide him with a calm and steady childhood.

As he apparated at Hogsmeade and made his way to the castle, his mind wandered again to this mystery professor.

It was most likely the new defense against the dark arts professor. Merlin knew they had a new one every year, and it wouldn’t be too odd that he would stumble upon dark artifacts.

As he entered the castle for the first time in years, the warm feeling it always brought him came back. The hallway was brimming with students of all ages. Some were rushing between classes, others were chatting and laughing.

The sight brought so many memories back, memories he cherished dearly but also wanted to bury and never think about again. Memories of pranks and detentions and mischief. Memories full of laughs and love, full of people who were either dead or far away.

“Mr. Potter, it’s very nice to see you again.” Minerva McGonagall appeared in front of him, a big smile on her face.

“Minnie! I mean Professor! It’s really good seeing you too”

“How is everything? How is Harry?”

“He’s great, everything’s great. Only five more years till he comes here and continues the great Potter legacy.” James laughed and McGonagall only shook her head.

“For everyone’s sake, let’s hope he has more Lily in him than you” she remarked in a sad tone.

“He does. He’s so kind and forgiving and loves knowing about everything and anything. I have him enrolled in a muggle school for now and he loves it.”

“I’m really glad to see you doing well James, but I must ask. What’s brought you here today?”

“Oh, of course. I’m on auror duty. I need to speak to a professor; I don’t know who exactly though”

“Well then let me lead you to the headmaster’s office, he must know who you are looking for”

As they walked through the halls together, nothing really had changed.

Hogwarts did seem livelier than before, especially James’ last year. That year, with Voldemort on the rise and attacks on muggles and muggleborn families every other day, everything felt dimmed.

After a short while, they made it to the Gargoyle statue that opened to them.

“Go up Mr. Potter, I’m sure the headmaster is expecting you”

“Thanks Minnie. It really was great seeing you again” James said and headed up the short stairs.

James didn’t know how he felt about seeing Dumbledore again.

Last time he saw him was about a month after the attack at Godric’s Hallow to ask for his invisibility cloak that Dumbledore had borrowed for a mission.

That meeting had been tense, and James had barely said a man to the man then. He didn’t blame him for what had went down that night, but James didn’t know if he could trust him. Dumbledore had been fully ready to put his son with Lily’s magic hating sister and her family who would have probably abused Harry for existing instead of Remus who was actual family to them.

With the years, the resentment went away, but James still wanted to keep his family close to his heart.

As he stepped into the office, he saw Dumbledore getting up to greet him. But he wasn’t alone.

Standing with his back to James was a tall man with long black curls and a straight posture, wearing a dark blue coat that screamed rich.

“James, my boy, it’s good to see you after all this time” Dumbledore started and James moved closer to properly greet him.

“It’s good to see you too, headmaster” James replied and only then did he catch a glimpse of the mysterious’ man face.

Holy shit.

Was James hallucinating or was Regulus Black standing in front of him, alive?

“Close your mouth Potter, you might catch flies”

What the actual fuck

Regulus Black was alive and looking at him with the same dark grey eyes and cold untouchable demeanor he always held himself in.

“I fear Mr. Potter is in shock at you being alive, Mr. Black”

“Yes, I can see that.”

He was talking and breathing and alive.

How?

When James remembered how to put words together, he finally asked:

“How? You were dead. I remember reading about it and Sirius pretending not to care.”

Regulus chuckled at his words and explained:

“Well to put it simply. I defected, was supposed to die but miraculously survived. I sought the headmaster who helped me go in hiding till the war was over.”

It made sense. Why didn’t Sirius know then?

“Before you ask why I didn’t tell Sirius, I couldn’t. When I left the dark side, I caused some immense problems for Voldemort and if I was ever found, I would have been tortured and killed. I had planned to tell him after the war ended, but we both know how that turned out.”

James nodded at his words, but was still confused.

“What are you doing here though? I would have assumed you wanted nothing to do with England after the war ended.”

“I did leave for a couple of years, but I was then offered a teaching position here at Hogwarts and I accepted it.”

Regulus was the professor he was supposed to meet?

Well, now he knew where the dark artifacts came from. The Blacks were notorious for their involvement in dark magic, until now apparently.

“Slughorn finally retired then? Merlin that’s good to hear. Harry won’t ever have to deal with him”

That made Regulus laugh in a way that James didn’t know the man could laugh. He didn’t know Regulus even knew how to smile.

The only faces James knew on Regulus were anger and boredom, usually directed at Sirius.

Before today, James could count on one hand the number of times him and Regulus spoke without Sirius present.

One time was in Regulus’ first year at Hogwarts, when he had found the boy clearly distressed one night, but Regulus had completely ignored his words and left.

The second time had been in James’ sixth year when he had been caught by Regulus, a prefect then, after curfew. His cloak had been with Sirius at the time. James had begged the other boy to not report him to Filch, to which Regulus had said a ‘sure’ but to no one’s surprise had dragged him to McGonagall’s office. He got a week of detention.

The third and final time was in Regulus’ sixth year when this time James, now head boy, had caught the other one out of bed after curfew at the Astronomy tower. At this time, almost everyone thought Regulus had already gotten the mark, alongside some of his other friends. Dumbledore had clearly told him if he were to catch any of the suspected death eaters out of bed, James should report his findings. However, James had never told anyone about that night.

“Slughorn did retire. Unfortunately, I am not his replacement” Regulus started with a pointed look to Dumbledore.

“I am the Astronomy professor. This is my third year now.”

Astronomy? That seemed right up a Black’s alley.

Sirius himself had hated astronomy, but he always scored top marks without ever studying. James knew why.

“Well, it might be a bit too late, but still congratulations. You deserve it.”

“I do?” Regulus looked at him weirdly.

“Well yeah. When the war was happening, you were just a kid, we all were. But you were forced to pick sides so soon and I know it was harder for you than for Sirius to just leave everything behind. But the fact that you still did means you’re a good person. So yes, you deserve to be happy Regulus” James replied and he could swear he saw Regulus’ eyes shine.

“Well then, with all that out of the way, I suppose it’s time for official business” Dumbledore spoke up for the first time, reminding both men that they were not alone.

“Right, of course. So, Regulus, did you sell a cursed box with some dark jewelry last week to Borgin and Burkes?” James sat down and asked, prompting Regulus to sit down opposite him.

“Yes. During my free time, I have been cleaning the Black properties from cursed and dangerous objects, and I stumbled upon the box in an attic. I believe it was a gift to my mother from her sister on her wedding day, but my mother knew better and stored it away” Regulus explained and James was baffled.

“A gift? In what world does such a cursed object make a fine wedding present?”

“Why James, I thought you knew all about the Black family craziness. I suppose there are still things you ought to learn.” Regulus replied with a smirk to which James felt his face redden.

“Right, so you decided to sell it away? Why not give it to a curse breaker?”

“To be honest Potter, I didn’t think it was worth the hassle. I could care less about some jewels. I never expected this to happen. Someone must truly be desperate to be cursed”

“Who knew of the box’s existence? It might be someone who always wanted to have it but couldn’t”

“As I already said. I myself only discovered its existence last week. I highly doubt anyone who knows about it is still alive”

Well, that’s bullocks. A dead end. Great way to start the day. He voiced his annoyance, to which Regulus looked apologetic.

“I’m sorry Potter, I truly wanted to help”

“Maybe you still can” James impulsively answered and was met with a confused gaze.

This was definitely a bad idea, but James couldn't care less.

“If you can and want to, you could join me for the search. You already know what the box actually looks like and I’m going to try to locate its magical signature from where it was last seen, so maybe you could help with that. If you want.”

Regulus looked pensive for a while and after about a minute or so of silence finally said with a small smile:

“Sure Potter, it’s Friday and I don’t have any classes till Monday. I’d love to help.”

Chapter Text

Chapter 6: Two Ghosts

1983, Borgin and Burks

“What are we doing back here again Potter?”

“I want to interrogate Mr. Borgin again, and I want to try to trace the artifacts using runes. You remember what they looked like right?” asked James and Regulus nodded as they made their way into the shop.

When Dumbledore had asked him to his office that morning, Regulus thought nothing of it. The headmaster sometimes had some bizarre tasks for him that had nothing to do with astronomy. Sometimes, he even helped Snape with prepping potions, even if the other man hated it.

This time however, Dumbledore said an auror was coming to see him, which led to some panic before the situation turned out to have nothing to do with his ex-death eater status and everything to do with the dark jewelry he had sold last week.

The old man hadn’t told him who the auror was, and James Potter definitely wasn’t told either who the original owner of those dark objects was.

Forever the Gryffindor, Potter had gaped at him like a fish. Regulus was also shocked, but he knew better than to act like a complete fool.

He had kept up with Potter and Lupin and little Harry in the past few years, and still sent a little present every birthday. He knew Potter was an auror and Lupin worked at the Magical Archives and Harry went to a muggle school, but that didn’t prepare him to see James Potter himself standing in front of him.

The last time he had seen the man was in his sixth year, just before his brother and his friends had graduated. Sirius had started a huge fight with him, as per usual. It was also the last time he had seen Sirius.

As much as Regulus was jealous of his brother’s best friend when he was younger, he found that he truly didn’t feel anything hateful towards him looking at him now, years later.

James had definitely changed. His hair was a bit shorter than it was back at Hogwarts. His glasses were the same as always. He was wearing the signature auror robes, which fit him perfectly and showed off his broad shoulders and muscles he had gained in auror training.

In short, James Potter looks just as fit as he always was, if a bit more.

However, Regulus clearly saw the change in the way he held himself in. Grief and loss and war had clearly taken a hold of him just as much as everyone else.

“Afternoon, is Mr. Borgin in?” James asked as they were met with some worker at the front desk who saw the auror robes on James and quickly went to the back.

“Don’t you think those robes are a bit intimidating? Shouldn’t aurors try to be secretive and blend in with the rest?” asked Regulus curiously.

“You’re probably right, but I don’t make the rules, especially after the war. The minister is adamant that people seeing us in broad daylight doing our jobs would help them feel more secure and safe. I don’t disagree. Plus, red was always my color don’t you think?” he replied with a smirk.

Oh, two could play that game.

“Yes, I agree. You did look quite ravishing in you old quidditch outfit.” he smirked back, and Potter’s face turned as red as his outfit. However, he never got the chance to say anything.

“Auror, I suppose this is about the stolen box of artifacts I reported?” asked Borgin, coming out of a back door and raising an eyebrow when he also saw Regulus.

“Mr. Black, what brings you here?”

“I am here assisting auror Potter with retrieving the artifacts I personally sold you. I didn’t realize then you couldn’t be trusted with a few small items. At least now I know where to not sell any future objects I find” Regulus replied with a glare that made Borgin gulp. He also clearly felt James beside him trying to stifle a laugh.

“I assure you Mr. Black you can trust us. This has never happened before. We have anti-theft charms in place. No wizard can just grab an object and apparate or go out the door without paying for it. That is precisely why I involved the aurors with this. It truly is a bizarre case”

“Where was the box put when it was stolen?” James asked, conjuring a paper and quill to write notes.

“It was just here on that platform in the front. I had put on it the usual protective charms to make sure no one would open it or steal it. I was alone here that day, and while I was with a customer, I heard a crack and I turned around and it was gone! Just like that!” Borgin explained and James wrote some things down.

“You said no one could apparate in here?”

“Yeah! That’s why the sound of a crack shocked me!”

James hummed and Regulus got to thinking.

If no one could apparate in or out, how did the box get stolen in a matter of seconds?

“Did you see anyone other than that customer in here?”

“No! It was just him!”

“Who was the customer? Perhaps it was him? He could have just been there to turn your attention away while a partner slips in and out unnoticed”

“No, if this customer wanted something, he would simply pay for it. I have dealt with his family just as long as the Blacks”

“I still need his name, please?”

“It was Lucius Malfoy. But he wouldn’t steal, you must know that.”

Of course, it was Malfoy. Regulus wasn’t even a bit surprised.

Since returning to England full time, he had gone to visit Cissa, his cousin.

They were always quite close, and she was very happy to see him alive and well. Lucius was beyond shocked, but couldn’t say anything seeing as he had lied to the ministry about being under the imperius curse the whole war and if he wanted, Regulus could submit his own memories to the ministry and send his cousin’s husband to Azkaban.

He didn’t though, because Cissa needed a husband and Draco needed a father.

He still went every week to have tea with them and was currently teaching Draco all about quidditch. He had also wanted to teach him potions, but Snape, as the boy’s godfather (and yes Regulus was incredibly pissed when he found out Severus Snape of all people was his nephew’s godfather), had that handled.

Therefore, it was impossible to put this on Malfoy. If Lucius had wanted something belonging to the Black family, Cissa would have no problem acquiring it for him.

“Well that’s up to me to decide not you, I will still need to interrogate him”

“It’s not him Potter” Regulus spoke up and James turned to him.

“Why not? He was the only one here. How else do you explain what happened?”

“I just saw Narcissa two days ago. I see her every week. If she wanted some Black artifact, she would tell me and I would have simply given it to her. No need for this whole debacle. Plus, if it truly was Lucius, he wouldn’t have been here for the actual theft.” Regulus explained but it was clear on James’ face he didn’t completely believe him.

“Potter, think about it. A man who evaded Azkaban for life isn’t going to risk being charged with a petty theft.”

“Well then who the hell could it be?” James huffed, clearly exasperated at the situation.

And suddenly, Regulus realized who the hell would steal a Black artifact.

“What if it wasn’t a wizard?” Regulus questioned after a minute of silence, and James looked at him weirdly.

“What, you think a goblin is going to walk in here and steal from a wizard?” James asked mockingly, and Regulus resisted the urge to hex him.

“No idiot. I meant a house elf. Their apparition magic isn’t like humans. It’s untraceable. Borgin, did you put any measures against elf magic?”

“Well obviously not. What crazy house elf would steal? They’re bound to serve. No house elf would defy their master and steal dark artifacts.” Borgin answered, looking at him as if he was a maniac.

“Well, I know one elf who believes stealing Black artifacts is a way of salvaging the Black legacy. Potter, I know where to find them.”

*-*

“KREACHER! Where are you? Come this instant!” Regulus yelled as soon as they entered Grimmauld place.

“Regulus, try to calm down a bit maybe? We’re not even sure it’s him.” James said with a worried expression.

“Potter, how are you an auror? Are you really worrying about a house elves’ wellbeing?” Regulus asked, to which James just shrugged.

“Master Regulus, you’re here! It’s been too long! Kreacher will make tea and then lunch!” the house elf said, appearing in front of them.

“No tea and lunch Kreacher. Stay right here and tell me the truth. Did you and did you not take the box that I got from Black manor back here?”

Kreacher gulped at his sharp tone, and quickly answered:

“Master, I only collected what was ours! Kreacher can’t let Black artifacts go to useless wizards! Kreacher only obeyed mistresses’ orders!”

“Mistress is dead Kreacher! She’s been dead for years! You only answer to me! Do you understand?” Regulus shouted at the elf who nodded franticly and shook.

A hand touched is bicep causing him to turn away from Kreacher.

“Regulus, you don’t have to be so hard on him. He just did what he thought was right. It’s not his fault.” James said with soft eyes, his hand slightly squeezing his arm.

“Just because he thought it was the right thing to do doesn’t mean it was, and he needs to know that.” Regulus replied, but they both know he wasn’t explicitly talking about Kreacher.

At 16, Regulus thought it was the right thing to take the mark and join a murderous psychopath and no one told him otherwise. And a year later, when he realized it wasn’t right, he ended up on the brink of death trying to save himself.

James didn’t know all that, but he was still looking at him with kind eyes, as if he could read right through him.

“Well, now he knows, and you’ll be there to remind him. He’s not alone” not like you were went unsaid, but they both heard it.

Regulus calmed down and quickly nodded, prompting James to take a step back and drop his hand.

“I’m sorry Kreacher for lashing out. I know you thought it was the right thing to do, but I don’t want to keep any cursed objects. You can’t steal anything ever again, do you understand?” Regulus said calming, crouching down to be on the same level as Kreacher.

“Kreacher understands. Kreacher won’t disappoint master Regulus ever again. Kreacher is sorry.”

“It’s all good Kreacher. Now can you bring us the box please?” Regulus asked and the house elf went away to get it.

“I apologize for my reaction. You weren’t meant to see that” Regulus then said to James, who simply shook his head and smiled his signature Potter smile.

“It’s all good, no harm down. You were just worried about him. I know you’re a good person.”

“No, you don’t Potter. You don’t even know me.” Regulus argued

“I don’t need to know someone to tell if they’re good or not. And your anger at him clearly came from a place of care. Plus, Sirius always told me Kreacher had a soft spot for you but couldn’t stand him” James laughed but quickly realized who he had mentioned and stopped laughing.

They still hadn’t talked about the person that linked them. Regulus’ brother by blood and James’ brother in everything but blood.

“Have you visited him?” Regulus asked quietly, as the atmosphere around them changed at the mention of his imprisoned brother.

“No, I still haven’t been able to face him. But Remus started visiting him once a month about two years ago. Sirius says he wasn’t the one to kill those muggles, it was Pettigrew and that Peter was still alive but in rat form. He’s an animagus you see... And I really want to believe Sirius, I love him, but there is no evidence indicating Peter is alive after that blast. I honestly don’t know what to believe.” James replied with tearful eyes.

Regulus didn’t know what to say or what to think about his brother.

Sirius and him had always been at odds, and their last conversation before everything had been a petty fight.

When Regulus didn’t say anything, James continued:

“I’m actually quite ashamed I haven’t gone to visit him yet. He’s my brother, he means so much to me, and he’s one the few people I love that I have left. But I couldn’t do anything except watch while they took him to Azkaban. I feel so guilty I just let them; I didn’t fight like he would have if our positions had been changed. He did it all for me and Lily and I did nothing for him.

“I was just so numb after everything. I lost Lily and almost lost Harry and even then, I couldn’t do anything but hear it all. Everyone kept saying how strong and brave I was to survive the attack but I’m just a coward who let a madman enter his home and destroy his life. And now after all these years, I don’t know how to face Sirius knowing I also didn’t fight for him.” James finished, tears freely flowing now.

“Well, if you’re a coward then I don’t know what I am. Sirius definitely wants to see you James, but I’m dead to him, quite literally and figuratively.”

“Regulus, I’m sure he’d love to see you-”

“No, no he wouldn’t. The moment I stayed behind in that house and he left I was dead to him. Maybe even before. And then I killed any hope of us talking again when I took the mark.”

“You know, back when the order told us you had died but nobody knew how, Sirius tried to act all nonchalant but I knew him better than that. He was devastated. He might not express it but you were his younger brother, and he always loved you even if he tried to deny it. And I’m sure he still loves you, even now.”

Regulus didn’t really believe James’ words. He was only trying to comfort him. But Regulus knew the truth. All him and Sirius now shared was a last name. Nothing more, nothing less.

“Look Regulus, I can see you don’t believe me. But you really should tell Sirius you’re alive, and how you’re alive, and let him decide whether or not he wants to talk to you again, cause right now he doesn’t even know you’re living. I didn’t know until a few hours ago. Just write him a letter, I’ll have Remus deliver it when he goes to visit next week.”

“Okay fine Potter, on one condition. You also send him a letter and stop feeling guilty about something you couldn’t control. Sirius misses you and you miss him, so for once in your life, stop being an idiot about it and just talk to him.”

“I’m not being an idiot but alright. I’ll send him a letter too. How shocked do you think he’ll be seeing letters from both of us on the same day?”

Regulus laughed at that and imagined the face his brother would pull reading those letters.

Kreacher then came back with the box, and James took it from him carefully and summoning another box with a lock, probably a magical seal, and putting the artifact inside.

“All done, I’ll be taking this to the curse-breakers, they’ll know what to do” said James with a smile that Regulus matched.

As James was leaving, he suddenly stopped and turned around.

“Hey Regulus, I know this is a bit out of nowhere, but me and Remus have lunch every day together. Would you like to join us?”

Lunch? With Potter and Lupin?

He never imagined seeing the pair ever again, and now James was offering him a branch.

“Yeah, sure Potter” he simply answered and they made their way out of Grimmauld place together.

What could possibly go wrong?

Chapter Text

Chapter 7: Are you gonna drop the bomb or not?

1983, Azkaban

Remus hated Azkaban, then again, everyone did. The last two years he spent visiting the prison didn’t make it any more welcoming.

It had taken him three years to be allowed to visit, since no one other than high-ranking ministry officials or close relatives were allowed here. He was neither of those things, but he was no quitter. James had played the ‘my son saved the bloody wizarding world’ card on the minister and had gotten them permission to visit once a month. James had hated using Harry and that awful night as leverage, but they needed to see Sirius.

However, once it was time to actually visit, James refused to go. He always made up some excuse, but Remus knew the guilt of leaving his brother all alone and not fighting for him was eating at his friend. Remus himself felt incredibly guilty.

The night of the attack, he had a huge fight with Sirius. The war had created a gap between them large enough to break the trust and the love they had built and led both of them to think they were betraying each other.

The last words they had said to each other had been: “I can’t even stand to look at you” from Remus and “Then don’t. I don’t even know how I ever loved you Moony” from Sirius before he had shut the door and left.

Remus knew Sirius was going to Lily and James’ to calm down and then come back in the morning. But morning came and with it came a heartbroken James and a crying Harry on his front door, and his world had come crashing down.

He deeply regretted what he had said to Sirius that night and the fact it was the last time he would see the man for years.

Before he was allowed entry, he had to weigh his wand and hand it over to the security desk just outside the fortress, and the guards also stripped him of any other items they deemed not safe.

As soon as the fortress door was open, the cold atmosphere englobed him. Dementors were cruel creatures, but as long as he is permitted here, they would not cause him any harm. The same couldn’t be said to the prisoners inside the walls.

Sirius was held on the fourth floor of the prison with other known death eaters such as Bellatrix Lestrange and Barty Crouch. Remus had memorized all the prisoners he saw every time he came here, and every visit they all seemed less alive and more insane.

His first visit had been nerve-wrecking. He didn’t know what state Sirius would be in, considering the fact he was already halfway to insanity when he got to Azkaban, and dementors were known to suck out every bit of happiness leaving only depression. As time went by, prisoners begin to prefer death over freedom. Remus was terrified that would be the case with Sirius.

However, Sirius had found a way to escape some of the damage by staying in his animagus form, which was still a secret to the ministry. On that first visit, he had been curling up in his dog form at the corner of his cell, and when Remus got there with a shy smile and waved, he had started jumping and running around as if it had been Christmas morning.

Their conversation that day wasn’t nearly enough to repair the damage the years apart had caused to their relationship, but it was a start.

They usually talked a lot about the war, with Sirius insisting he had not killed anyone and that it was Pettigrew who blew off that street and transformed into his rat form and was still alive somewhere.

Remus had taken some time before believing him, but the more he talked to Sirius the more he realized he hadn’t changed at all. Sure, the war, Azkaban and the dementors had fucked him over, but in his heart and soul, he was still the same Padfoot Remus had fallen in love with all those years ago.

And so, on their monthly visits, they theorized on where exactly Peter could be hiding and how to stop him.

They usually also talked about James, Harry and Remus’ life. At first, Sirius hadn’t even known that James had survived the attack. But when Remus explained it all, Sirius had had a meltdown and refused to talk to anyone but James.

Remus never told James about that. He didn’t want to put any pressure on his best friend when he already felt responsible for Sirius’ actions and his imprisonment.

After a while and James not visiting, Sirius had eventually stopped asking for him and instead started asking about him and Harry and their lives.

Today, as he walked up the familiar corridor with two letters in hand, he was met with Padfoot curled up right in front of the prison door, seemingly asleep.

“Hey Padfoot, missed me much?” Remus asked, waking Sirius up who turned back to human form and looked at him with sleepy eyes and a small smile.

Remus desperately wanted to hug the man, but the protection charms around each cell kept him from reaching out.

“Moony, you’re here. Has it been a month already? Time moves real fucking fast when you’re a dog. How was your last moon?”

“It was alright, nothing out of the ordinary. I got the Wolfsbane potion and then apparated to the forest near the old Yorkshire house and James picked me up the next day and helped-”

“James didn’t spend it with you? Why?” Sirius interrupted him, looking at him confused.

It wasn’t the first time Sirius asked that question, and it wouldn’t be the last as long as he was around dementors.

Sirius wasn’t mad or insane, but Remus knew it was impossible to spend years around dementors and not have any effect on your state of mind. However, Remus would always be there to help him through everything.

“Well of course he didn’t Pads. He has Harry to take care of and we don’t really trust anyone on the outside to help, you know that” Remus reminded him gently, and Sirius only nodded.

“Well actually I have something for you, two things actually” Remus continued as he took out the two letters entrusted to him.

Last week had been a bit of a shocker.

When James had sent a Patronus ahead of their lunch break telling him he was brining a familiar face, Remus thought nothing of it. He imagined it could be someone they knew back at school who James had met again and invited on the spot. He hadn’t imagined it would be Sirius’ younger and supposedly deceased brother who was also a death eater.

Apparently, Regulus Black was alive and well and had faked his death after he defected from the dark side. He was also a Hogwarts professor now.

James had met him on the case he was working on, and the two had ended up talking more and more about their shared experiences, mainly Sirius, and were both now prepared to send him a letter to try and reconnect with him.

Remus was truly and utterly confused at the time. Back at Hogwarts, he only ever heard and saw the effects of the horrors of the house of Black from Sirius who usually grouped his brother with the rest of the family. Remus knew it was always more complicated than that and was witness to many fights between the brothers and subsequential breakdowns from Sirius.

At that lunch, he could see Regulus had matured over the years. He wasn’t the spiteful brother or the cold-hearted Slytherin he was made out to be, and he was ready to make amends with his brother, and who was Remus to say no to that?

The one who had truly confused him was his best friend. James had never explicitly admitted why he had cut off Sirius, but Remus knew how to read between the lines. Now however, James was fully willing to talk to Sirius again, even if not directly. His stance towards the subject had changed a complete 180 in the span of a few hours and Remus of course knew this had Regulus written all over. What he didn’t understand was how the hell had the younger man convinced James to work out his guilt and write this letter.

What’s more is that following the lunch, James had also invited Regulus to dinner that same week under the guise of giving them the letter, and then again later on tonight to get the response from Sirius, to which Regulus happily agreed with a smile. Remus didn’t know the younger Black could even smile.

Remus didn’t really mind this odd friendship James and Regulus had going, and it clearly has a good effect on both men.

However, they had also left it upon Remus to let Sirius know his brother was alive and free, and Remus wanted to kill them for it.

“What you got there, Moons?” asked Sirius, looking at the two letters in Remus’ hand.

“Before that Pads, I have something important I need to tell you, so please listen carefully” Remus started

“Last week, James met someone on a case, someone we know and you especially know very well. We thought this someone was long dead during the war but he apparently survived and went into hiding because of Voldemort. James and I were very surprised to learn he was alive, and I’m sure you will be as well, and he asked me to bring you a letter as a way for you two to start talking again. I can read you the letter, if you want.”

Sirius looked at him very confused and stayed silent for a minute before asking: “Who are you talking about Moony?”

Remus looked him in the eyes and took a deep breath before answering: “It’s Regulus. Regulus Black is still alive”

Sirius looked at him for a minute then started laughing manically.

“Regulus Black? My brother? This is hilarious Moony! Merlin, I forgot how funny you could be!”

“Padfoot, Sirius, this isn’t a joke. He’s alive. He survived the war and faked his death.”

“No, no he isn’t. He died. He was a bloody death eater like the lot of them and got himself killed. Don’t lie to me about my brother Rem, I don’t appreciate it” Sirius said, not laughing anymore but instead looking intensely at Remus.

“Sirius you have no reason to believe me, but he is. He defected and it did get him nearly killed but he’s out there. I saw him just last week, and I’m seeing him tonight too” Remus explained calmly, but he could see his words were not reaching Sirius.

“All you’re doing Moony is lying! LIAR! MY BROTHER IS DEAD! DEAD! AND HE HAD IT COMING! STOP LYING TO MY FUCKING FACE!” Sirius yelled and started cursing.

“I’m not Sirius. I would never do that to you. He is alive, and I just found out about it. I can tell you-”

“REMUS STOP IT! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR A THING ABOUT THAT SNAKE! HE’S DEAD! DEAD! I WON’T HEAR ANY LIES! I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOU ANYMORE SO JUST FUCK OFF!” Sirius yelled again and turned back into his dog form, promptly ending the conversation.

Remus wasn’t too surprised about Sirius’ breakdown. He had a similar -maybe less aggressive- one when he found out James was alive. He just didn’t know how to convince him that his brother is also alive.

“Okay Padfoot, I don’t want to hurt you. I have a letter here though; you don’t mind just listening?” Remus asked as he sat down on the floor opposite to Sirius who didn’t respond to his words. Remus took that as a yes to open up Regulus’ letter and start to read:

“Dear Sirius,

I’m sure you’re not quite believing Remus for the moment, but I am very much alive.

I realize I should have come to you earlier, and I am sorry for waiting so long. I was always under the impression you wouldn’t want to see me and would prefer to pretend I was dead, so I let you go. However, it has come to my attention recently to let you make that choice and not make it for you.

I always imagined we would talk again after the war ended and I could finally see you again, and that we might forgive each other for the last decade of our lives, and I was deeply saddened that never happened.

I miss you. I always have, even when we were still under the same roof. After you went to Hogwarts that first year, it was never the same between us, and I deeply regret I let our parents separate us.

I won’t say I regret staying because I don’t. Staying and becoming a death eater allowed me to destroy the dark from the inside. I found out the Dark Lord’s secret and destroying it almost killed me. However, I was given another chance at life that I don’t intend to waste. I only hope you will grant me my wish of seeing you again in this lifetime.

I love you brother. I don’t think I’ve said it nearly enough, but even when I hated you, I loved you.

You’ll always be my brother Sirius, even if I’m not yours.

Love,

R.A.B"

R.A.B? Remus knew he had read that somewhere before, but he just couldn’t remember where.

When he finally looked up from the letter, he was Sirius back in human form, wiping tears from his face.

“He’s really alive Moony? He really betrayed Voldemort?” Sirius asked in a small voice.

“Yeah Pads, he is. He defected and went into hiding. By the time Voldemort was dead, you were already here and he couldn’t see you.”

“How is he now? Did he seem okay to you?”

“Yeah, he’s doing pretty good. He’s teaching Astronomy at Hogwarts now. Dumbledore offered him the position a few years ago and he took it.”

“Reggie’s a professor? And Astronomy of all things? Merlin I definitely wasn’t expecting that” Sirius huffed out a little laugh to which Remus smiled.

“Yeah, me neither Pads, but he’s happy”

“Do you think he’d want to see me?”

“Yeah, he definitely would. He didn’t know if you’d want that though”

“I want to see him. Can you bring him with you next time Moony, please?”

“Of course, Padfoot. Whatever you want” Remus replied and once again desperately and hopelessly wished he could pull the other man in his arms and hug him tight.

Then Remus remembered he had another letter to deliver today.

“Hey Pads I actually have another letter to you here. This one is from James.” Remus started carefully, looking out for Sirius’ reaction.

“James? James Potter?”

“Yes, Sirius how many James do you know?” Remus laughed but Sirius did not share the sentiment.

“Well James Potter has made it quite clear he doesn’t want to talk to me”

“That’s not it Pads, he just feels responsible for you being here”

“How is he responsible? I’m the one who recklessly went after that fucking rat who still got away”

“Maybe I can read his letter to you. It might help you understand his point of view?” Remus suggested and Sirius shrugged. Remus took it as a sign to open up the second letter and start reading:

“Dear Sirius,

You’re definitely very mad at me, and you have every right to be.

Ever since Dumbledore told me that you went after Peter and will be going to Azkaban because of that, I have been feeling incredibly guilty about it all, because it is all my fault. You’ve been all alone these past five years because of me.

I saw you that night rushing in and seeing me, and all I wanted to do was scream at you to wait and not go there alone. But I couldn’t. I was too weak, and I still am. I failed you. I failed Lily. I failed Harry. I failed my whole family and lost you all in one night. Nothing I could ever do can make up for that, and I will spend the rest of my life paying for it.

I want to see you. I want to hug you and forget these past few years. But I can’t. I can’t bring myself to look you in the eye and apologize for sending you to your death. I can’t stand in front of you free and tell you I want you in my life when I ended yours.

People always call me brave for surviving that night, but I am the farthest thing from bravery and loyalty. I am a coward. I will never forgive myself for abandoning my brother when he needed me most, and I hope you never forgive me either.

I miss you like hell. I don’t know how to live without you and Lily by my side, but I try my best for Harry. Every day I look at my son, I see the future I will never have because I am a weak man who can’t fight for his own family.

This letter isn’t really asking for forgiveness. I could never ask you to do that. But I don’t want you to forget that I do love you Sirius. I’ve loved you since we met on that train so long ago and I’ll love you even after death takes me away.

Love,

Prongs.”

“Is he serious?” Sirius asked after a minute or so of silence

“He is. He hasn’t really talked to me about it, but I knew he felt responsible and couldn’t face you”

“It’s my own fucking fault I’m here, not his or anyone else’s. But he is right, he’s a huge fucking coward.”

“Sirius, he’s not really-”

“NO REMUS HE IS! IT’S BEEN FIVE FUCKING YEARS! HE COULDN’T COME HERE AND TALK TO ME? I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR MY BEST FRIEND TO VISIT ME FOR YEARS AND HE’S TOO MUCH A WIMP TO FACE ME? NO FUCK HIM” Sirius yelled angrily.

Remus didn’t know what to say. He understood James’ regret and guilt and why he couldn’t see Sirius. But on the other hand, he also understood Sirius’ frustration with James not visiting these past few years.

“You’re right Padfoot. He is five years too late. But he regrets it, he does. And he misses you like hell. And I’ll be honest with you. It was Regulus who pushed him to write this”

“Regulus? Why would he listen to my brother of all people?”

“Because James can relate to him. They both lost quite a lot in the war. We all did. But they both lost you as a brother. And they both love you too much to ever let go. James will carry his guilt for all his life and Regulus will always regret not talking to you again”

“They shouldn’t. I did what I did. It’s my own fault I’m stuck here for life. And Peter’s. But we have to find the fucking bastard first.”

“We will. I promise we will.”

“I want to see them, both of them. You better drag them here next month or I’ll never talk to James ever again. I want him to look me in the eye and tell me all this, and then I want to yell at him till he begs for forgiveness. Got it Moony?”

“Don’t worry Pads, we’ll all be here groveling for you next time.”

*-*

“He said what?” James yelled as Remus told them what Sirius had demanded.

“All three of us, next month, Azkaban. You can’t say no.” Remus repeated simply and James started yelling again.

“Sounds like a fun date. Shall I bring some firewhiskey with me? Potter will most definitely need it” Regulus said with a smirk and caused James to get even angrier.

Remus knew Sirius would forgive the both of them next month. He knew today was the last time he would ever have to visit Sirius alone. He also knew this would be the start of something. He just didn’t know what yet.