Chapter Text
Loneliness was a very familiar feeling, at least to Taph. It was the first thing he came to know. The painful isolation he was forced to abide by since his creation. He knew the only reason Telamon hadn’t thrown him out like trash was because he was far too arrogant to admit that he made a mistake.
He didn’t think he could feel more alone than he did every single day. Till now, as he found himself lying on the cold ground. It was supposed to be a normal day, blowing up stuff like usual before going back to Telamon. But he found himself unable to reach the domain at all, and it wasn’t long before panic set in.
Did Telamon finally decide to abandon him? Did he do something wrong again? Anything he did at this point was enough to get on Telamon's nerves. But as he wracked his brain for answers while he continued to try and bring himself to Telamon's domain, he found a sense of relief starting to wash over him.
If Telamon finally decided to cut his leash, did that mean he was finally free? He wasn’t chained to him anymore? He was free? He was free. He was free.
The words reverberated in his head, elation making his wings twitch. He could live however he wanted to now, right? Nobody was going to tell him what to do now…
Nobody was going to tell him what to do. Which meant he no longer really had a purpose, did he? And suddenly the panic crawled right back up his throat. Oh god, what was he going to do now…?
With Telamon, his life had some form of structure. He had a reason to exist. But now he was nothing more than some puppet without a puppeteer, a servant without a master. It’s not like he could just live a normal life, as a normal person, doing normal person things. Not something like him. Not something as monstrous as him, no.
He was a bird who spent its whole life in a cage, and now that he was set free, he had no idea how to live without it. There was nothing else to do but wander and hope that he either found another purpose… or disappeared.
The city he found himself in was barren of any life, but it didn’t look abandoned; in fact, it looked very well lived in. Strange bright lights decorated the buildings, coming in all sorts of colors, but the most frequent ones were shades of red and green. A combo that only served to confuse Taph more.
Everyone was probably huddled inside their homes already, safe from the freezing temperature outside, or maybe because it was pretty late in the night. Taph wasn’t so lucky as he felt another chilling breeze hit his face; he grabbed his hood to prevent it from blowing down as he persisted forward. His wings tightened around him in an attempt to stay warm.
His body shook violently as he struggled to put one foot in front of the other. Where was he even going? He had been walking for what felt like hours; he looked up to view the building that was still about a mile ahead. It was the tallest one in the city and stood out like a sore thumb among the more simple-looking buildings.
He didn’t know why, but he almost felt drawn to it. Something in him was yelling at him to get there as quickly as possible. But his legs were starting to become numb, and his feet were just feeling heavier and heavier with each step.
Usually, he wouldn’t dare to even step outside Telamon’s domain if it got this cold. Telamon had been merciful enough to allow him to hide away and wait it out. Despite his cruelty, he was all he truly had. But Telamon was gone, and Taph now had nothing.
He was gone and left Taph to figure out how to live in this scary, freezing, unfamiliar world. The flashing lights were starting to strain his eyes as the frost nipped at his feathers. Everything was just going wrong, and like usual, he could do nothing but live with it.
Or maybe it would be better if he did freeze out here. He could just find whatever corner he can fit himself in and disappear for good. The cold wouldn’t take too long to finish him off. The world wouldn’t bat an eye at his absence; in fact, he’d probably be doing it a favor.
Suddenly a white blur crossed his vision, and he stopped in his tracks. Staring as a tiny white speck floated gracefully to the ground in front of him. How… peculiar. It didn’t seem like the time of year for pollen to be flying around. At least that’s what he thought it was.
He looked up to see even more falling from the dark clouds hanging above. Which was even weirder, since when did it rain pollen? He watched as they collected on the ground, coating it in white. He was so distracted by this new discovery of his that he didn’t notice his clothes beginning to dampen. These white specks were wetting his cloak almost like rain.
He shivered as warmth began to steadily leave his body. He really had to get walking now, or he really was going to die out here. And so he marched on as the specks piled onto him. Making him have to shake his wings to get them off. What cosmic being did he manage to piss off this time for this to be happening to him? Or was Telamon actually secretly behind this? It was a silly accusation, but the chill was making his head buzz, and his thoughts were starting to mush together.
The tall building was getting closer now; he could see lights from the windows that littered its walls. He could also almost make out silhouettes. He didn’t even know why that mattered. He wasn’t going to dare to go inside. He didn’t want to taint this place with his presence more than he had to.
He didn’t want to punish anyone with his company. He heard enough from Telamon; he didn’t need more people to tell him how unwanted he is. He didn’t need more people who saw him and had to look away in disgust or, worse, pity.
There was one person that actually looked at him with an ounce of kindness before. But there was no chance he’d run into Builderman again. And honestly, maybe that was for the best. After what happened last time. Just that one conversation with him was enough for Taph; there was no point in being greedy for anything more.
His grip on his arms tightened as another gust hit him. He really should just go and disappear. There was nothing for him out here. There was no freedom for him. There was nothing to do but accept that this was it.
He was going to die out here.
The specks had now piled a few inches on the ground, making it now even harder to walk. He could barely feel his legs at this point, completely numb from the cold. He couldn’t even properly feel his body as it trembled uncontrollably. Any warmth he previously wanted to retain was gone. He was so, so cold. And so unbearably exhausted.
He was just about to let himself fall there and then but paused as he realized he was right in front of the tall building from before. He couldn’t see the top from this close. It looked important. It felt important. He felt a sense of guilt for sullying it with his proximity.
From this close he could actually see people inside. He could make out a large room with a desk in the far back with someone seated at it. A few people were walking around; some were in conversation with each other. Laughing and smiling. They looked normal. They looked like they belonged here.
He didn’t. He never would.
He had to leave.
Before he did anything he would regret. Before he even thought about going inside. No. He couldn’t; he would suck out all the warmth like a leech. He didn’t deserve to want that warmth. He didn’t deserve to be greedy like that.
Before he could back away, he suddenly felt himself going in the exact opposite direction. Well, almost. He was actually heading straight down. His legs had finally given up on him, and he didn’t bother to attempt to catch himself. His head hit the stairs; the white specks had cushioned his fall enough that he wasn’t immediately taken out.
And so, here he was. Pathetically squirming about on the white-coated ground. His limbs were completely unresponsive. His wings were covered in white and felt heavy on his back. This was actually it, wasn’t it? He was going to die here. Right on the steps of this building. He felt bad for whoever would be unfortunate enough to find his body.
He’d surely be pushed aside like roadkill, then promptly forgotten about. Nobody would remember him; he’d fade into complete obscurity. Perhaps for the best. His life wasn’t very impressive anyway.
He could almost make out the faint sound of crunching footsteps approaching as his world plunged into darkness.