Work Text:
Blitzø hated emotions.
He always had.
He thought they were for pussies, people who wouldn’t get by in this world.
At least thats the beliefs that were forced onto him growing up.
When did he become one of those people?
After the trial, after sinsmas, after everything that happened, Blitzø had found himself having more and more nightmares of the past.
Of what events exactly?
The circus fire , the day he lost his mother and countless other friends and the day his sister started hating him.
The date at Ozzie’s , when he convinced himself he was nothing more than a plaything for Stolas and that he didn’t really matter to him after he saw the way Stolas was ashamed of being seen with him.
The Trial , the time where he almost actually died , the most recent addition to his already ongoing night terrors.
He was sick of this shit.
After he took Stolas in , business was going good for a while. After the first few weeks working alongside Blitzø and his crew Stolas had gotten the hang of working his boring ass desk job for the company, and despite circumstances not being great it was.. nice to say the least. At least Blitzø though so, he liked seeing Stolas around more often.
Even though Blitzø wouldn’t say jack, everyone at that office knew that despite how much he insisted he “hated love” and “didn’t wanna date” and other bullshit he spat he was lying straight trough his teeth. Everyone saw the way Blitzø and Stolas interacted, the way they spoke, it was different from before.
Unfortunately, that relationship would go down the drain more and more every time Blitzø thought back to their past together, how they started meeting again from a fucking misunderstanding, how Stolas was ashamed to admit that he was seeing Blitz and how now he was stuck living and working with him because he felt he HAD to save Blitzø at the trial.
Of course half of that wasn’t true, but try to convince Blitzø of that after a shitty day,night whatever time it was.
After half a day of work with no customers , Blitz let the m&m’s leave early,there was no point in keeping them there if there were no missions, and if anything was going to pop up he was sure he could handle it by himself. He allowed Loona to finally take the car and go wherever the fuck she wanted to go, he hadn’t been paying much attention if he was honest, as long as she was responsible and kept her promise to not be reckless and to text him every once in a while so he could make sure she was safe and sound, it was fine.
And as for him and Stolas, he proposed they head home early and close business for the day, whatever, if anyone really needed their services they could wait a little longer.
As Stolas and Blitzø were walking home , Blitzø remembered he had forgotten to swing by the store and grab a few things for dinner. So he gave the apartment keys to Stolas and said he would return soon and that he should go ahead and head home. Stolas insisted he come with but Blitzø is a stubborn bitch so he had it his way.
Blitzø hadn’t slept well that night,he woke up from another nightmare , this time it was a tad bit different from normally. Instead of the usual recurring string of events , it was like his thoughts and memories mixed to make a whole new monster.
Instead of seeing Stolas defending him in court he saw him laying down on the guillotine looking structure HE was standing at before, it looked like he was about to get executed.In the dream world he tried to help him, to rescue him, but it was like he was trapped in place unable to intervene.
He woke up just before the blade hit his neck.
He was covered in sweat and close to sobbing, he only felt a small amount of relief when he saw stolas next to him. Blitzø couldn’t sleep after that, how could he? He just hoped him waking up hadn’t woken up Stolas or Loona aswell.
As he was walking towards the store he kept thinking about the nightmare. Huh. The actual thing wouldn’t have even happened if Blitzø just wasn’t a fucking dick, if he hadn’t tried to break into Stolas’s house that one evening.
He thought more about it and, he seemed to track that all of the shit he went through was his own fucking fault. Problem is , he wasn’t the only victim.
Blitzø decided that maybe dinner wouldn’t be served that night.
He strayed from his original course to the store to instead making his way to some nearby quiet alley where he was sure nobody else would wander in the near future. As he kept walking he checked his pockets trying to find something that could be useful to what he was planning. Slowly, he started emptying them,he didn’t have much anyways. He pulled out his wallet, a random piece of gum he didn’t remember putting there,his phone and exactly what he was searching for, his gun. He always kept it on him, i mean he was basically a criminal , how careless could he be to just walk out with nothing that could protect him.
He slid down the alley wall, just thinking if he was seriously going to do this or if it was another time he would shrug and just decide this wasn’t the best time.
He was deep in thought,his belongings scattered beside him, his phone suddenly buzzed, it was a message from Stolas.
“Blitz, are you going to return soon?”
He wasn’t sure what to do,he was sure the answer was fuck no, he wasn’t going to return at all. But how could he explain that to Stolas,to his daughter,to his coworkers?
So he did the only thing he deemed reasonable in that situation, he lied.
“Yah jsut the lin is long”
He prayed to Lucifer Stolas wouldn’t suspect anything..- he got a text back.
“Alright dear, stay safe❤️”
..Fuck.
Maybe he was wrong, maybe Stols did care,but he was already here.This relationship was just one good thing on top of the pile of shit that was his life.
Slowly,he started typing out another message to Stolas. An apology for what he was about to do.
“Im swry Stols , pls take care of Loony nd the kompany”
Sent.
He set his phone down next to him and picked up the gun instead. He put it up to his temple and-
Click.
He felt the blood dripping down the side of his face, he heard ringing in his ears from the loud bang that just shattered his skull and he felt his consciousness fading. As he fell to the floor, his ears now quiet and his eyes closed, he recognized that his phone was ringing,Stolas’s owl ringtone he set up.
He hoped Stolas wouldn’t feel guilty about not actually going with him to the store.