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Chapter Text

A pile of paperwork casted a shadow over Copia's desk, blocking out the light of the lamp he had set up. He felt like it was everyday the same routine - and it was slowly starting to torture him, both physically and mentally. He had quickly realized how things had started to change, what came with the responsibility of being called Frater Imperator. He had never known that Sister Imperator had done so much for him, the band - just the ministry as a whole. And although the new title added a weight to his shoulder, it did not manage to distract him from everything that was going on.

He often found himself wandering the cold, empty, long hallways of the ministry - the place he calls home. But it felt different now. Less warm, less comforting and just less... what it once was. Maybe it was the lingering gap in his heart - the one his mother's death left behind. Or maybe it was the fact that everything was different. Change had never sat right with Copia. He liked the times when things just were the same. Those were the times when he felt safe, comfortable and just at peace. Now all that was shattered. He lost people, lost his title, got a new one, found out he had a secret twin brother. He felt like he was trapped in a cage, all those new responsibilities that came with being Frater and the knowledge of what he had lost pushing on his soul and heart, crushing it a little more each day.

A sigh slipped past his lips, and he looked up to check the time. 21.34pm. Just great. He felt tired, eyes burning and muscles feeling heavy. His brain was mush. He had started with his paperwork at 6.30 in the morning, and only had a couple, short breaks since then. He was done with this shit for today. Pushing himself away from the desk, he shut the light off and stood up, stretching his muscles and making a couple joints pop loudly. He left the small, stuffy office, shutting the door and making sure to lock it. Right now, all he wanted was a juice pack - cherry, if possible - a warm blanket and... a hug. Comfort. But who would he get that from anyways? Everyone he had always gone to had left him. His mother was gone. Dead. And for what? So that he could do this shitty job now? So that he could give up what meant most to him; being papa?

His eyes started to itch, and he quickly rubbed at them to wipe possible tears away. His stupid brother. 'Papa Perpetua'. Copia scoffed just thinking about it. Not only did he never have any idea of this man's existence, now he was here, taking everything from him. His office, his chambers, his job and his fucking title. And deep down, there was something else he couldn't bear. That man took his ghouls. His ghouls. He had seen the new stage fits - he had been the one to approve them. Something about it didn't sit right with him. The ghouls all looked amazing - like they always did - but Copia still had a bitter taste in his mouth whenever he remembered that technically the ghouls he summoned (at least most of them), were now under his command. Stupid idiot didn't even summon his own, had to steal them from Copia.

He wandered the halls aimlessly, gaze cast to the ground as his feet clicked off the polished stone floor. He knew these halls by heart. His mind raced with thoughts he didn't want anymore - thoughts he had somewhat tried to drown in that new routine, in paperwork and silence that he didn't even like. All that hate, self-doubt, the loneliness - it was eating him from the inside out. And he was at loss for what he could do, where he could go. He had no idea how long he had been walking, but suddenly he stopped. Looking up, he quickly realized where his tired feet had carried him; the ghoul's den. The heavy oak door was just a little more scraped than last time he had been here. The little scuffs at the bottom where Sodo always kicked his boots off too hard. Or the scratches around the door handle, where Swiss' long claws would scrape at the wood from not catching the door knob in his hurry.

For a long moment, he stood there, staring at the scraped and beaten wooden door. Every little cut held so many memories... for some of them he hadn't even been here, and they had gotten there through some other ghoul. But most of them were because of his ghouls. His heart twisted in his chest. Would they even want him here now? They had a new leader, didn't they? They had a new papa, a new direction. They weren't his ghouls anymore. They were Perpetua's. Maybe they would be better off that way. Maybe they had grown tired of him, and something new is a welcome change for them. He knows those ghouls. As wild and rowdy as they are, they quickly got bored. Nagging thoughts in the back of his mind kept telling him that they had grown bored of him too.

No. He couldn't let himself spiral again. Not tonight. He hadn't slept the last three nights because he can't seem to shut his mind off - and it showed. His eyes were a little bloodshot, just a little puffy from tears, and the bags under his eyes spoke volume. He needed help, and he needed comfort. This was the only place that he could possibly find it. With a shaky exhale, he braced himself for the possible impact of rejection and reached for the door knob. As soon as the door opened, he was met with warmth and soft, dim lightning spilling out of the room. Soft music played in the background, and the quiet hum of so well-known voices reached his ears. And that familiar, grounding scent of fire, wool blankets and ghoulish musk. It was a sense of home for him, especially in these rough times for the Frater.

He stepped inside carefully and tentative, holding his breath as if he was scared he would be thrown out almost immediately. But the ghouls were there, and as soon as he felt brave enough to look up, seeing their wide-eyed, worried expression, he felt something in his chest loosen. The worry melted, leaving behind a familiar, comfortable warmth spreading through his chest. He felt welcomed here. And he could feel it all the way to his aching bones. His ghouls hadn't banished him yet, and that thought brought already so much peace to his troubled mind.

Mountain was the first one to notice him, the huge ghoul standing up from his seat and walking over to Copia. His aura and expression was as calm and grounding as usual - radiating off in waves and seeping into Copia's tired body. He soon felt himself being developed into a tight, comfortable hug, no words exchanged. Copia knew Mountain well enough to understand that the earth ghoul didn't need words - his hugs spoke more than words could ever say anyways - he knew, he understood and he cared. The ex-pope knew he did, and let himself relax into the hug, accepting all the comfort it was offering him. A whine almost slipped out of him as Mountain broke away, but he held back, just looking up at the earth ghoul with a pouty expression that Mountain smiled at.

Before Copia could even complain about the loss of contact, Cumulus was already approaching him, a worried expression etched onto her face. "Oh darling... what happened?" she asked, taking one of his gloved hands in hers, and brushing her thumb over it. Her eyes searched his face, taking in just how tired and exhausted he looked. She was the mom of the pack, and her concern counted for every pack member - apparently including Copia. The realization almost brought tears to his eyes. "No no... come here, you need to rest. Sit down." He was guided over to the sofa by her, and he let himself fall down. He hadn't said a word yet. He just wanted to drown in all this warmth, both from the fire crackling in the fire place and the love and care from the ghoul's around him.

He felt a gentle hand brushing a strand of hair from his face, and he offered a small smile of appreciation up at the air ghoulette. She smiled back, nodding softly before she went to talk with some of her packmates. Copia felt the sofa dip beside him with the weight of another ghoul. He looked over, smiling again as he saw Phantom's slightly confused, but still concerned look. "What's wrong, Papa?" he asked, voice small, almost sounding childish. The words made Copia's breath catch in his throat. He was actually still referring to him as 'Papa'? "O- oh... I'm just... tired, little one. I think I need some rest from all my duties as Frater," Copia hesitantly explained, unsure if maybe his voice would fail him. Phantom nodded, immediately going to action to care for his papa - even if Copia wasn't Papa anymore. Phantom knew that, but sometimes he still preferred to call him that.

He took Copia's hands in his, gently tugging his gloves off. Holding both hands in his own, Phantom offered comfort with a soft hold and just a little bit of quintessence for the calming effect. "You don't have to be Frater right now," the quint said, playing with one of the rings Copia wore underneath his gloves, "you can just be Copia here." Copia let out a long, weary sigh as he sank back into the couch, the tension in his muscles slowly easing under the influence of Phantom's quintessence. The ghoul's presence and powers were like a balm - quiet and grounding. His eyes fluttered open again as he felt a gentle weight settle across his shoulders. A breath hitched in his throat, before easing out as he realized someone had draped a woolen blanket over him. Warmth, not just in temperature but in sentiment, seeped into his bones. It wasn't just a blanket - it was a silent act of care, a reminder that he was still seen, still cherished. Copia looked around, seeing Swiss - the usual cheeky, bold ghoul looking utterly soft and worried today. He felt a pang in his heart, knowing he made his ghouls feel that way.

The multi ghoul sat down beside their ex-papa, not saying a word and just slithering a hand around his waist, holding him close. Swiss was barely ever seen like this, but in the right moments he had a gentle heart. And he definitely had a soft spot for Copia. He always had. Copia was his savior - the one who dragged him out of the depth of hell. Copia was for most of them, but even if not, they all had a special place for Copia in their heart, and none of them would ever banish him for his twin that had just turned up. But Copia would still worry. They were all he had left, so what if Perpetua ends up taking not only their loyalty, but also their love? What would he do if even if ghouls leave him?

"You look like shit, boss." Sodo's voice. Copia looked up. Seeing the small fire ghoul in front of him made his chest ache. But it wasn't pain, it was something more raw - Familiarity. Loyalty. Sodo wore a somewhat gentle smile - a rare, but very appreciated sight. The Frater really appreciated his attempt of lightning the mood, and he let out a cracked chuckle, his voice rough from exhaustion. "How flattering..." The fire ghoul's expression softened, and he ruffled Copia's hair before handing a juice box over to him. Copia couldn't hide the excited flash in his eyes, seeing that it was even his favorite flavor - cherry. He looked back up at Dew, "thank you." Sodo just nodded at him, giving him a last pat on the shoulder before he went to take his seat next to Mountain again.

Copia felt so much more at ease now. The atmosphere was calm, the blanket around his shoulders offering warmth and the two ghoul's on either of his side offering comfort. Clutching the juice box in his hands and taking a few sips, Copia slowly felt the tension leaving his shoulders. Just then, the water ghoul settled in front of him on the floor, resting his head gently in the Frater's lap - a silent gesture of comfort that spoke louder than words. "Cumulus and Cirrus are cooking a meal for us... and you'll stay. We want you to eat with us." Copia's gaze went down to Rain, eyebrows raised in confusion. Tentatively, he moved his free hand into the ghoul's hair, "r- really...?" His voice was small, so quiet that Rain almost didn't catch what he said. "Of course we do. We want you here... and we missed you. You're still part of our pack, Copia."

A wave of emotions crashed over the poor frater, and he finally couldn't hold his tears anymore. He had been so worried, so scared, and for what? These were the most gentle and loving creatures he had ever met, and he loved every single one of them dearly. He realized now how unfair that fear had been. They hadn't stopped loving him. Not for a second. They were all right there, ready to soothe his pain and tears. They would never stop being loyal to him. He was their true leader - the one they all had respect and love for. And it broke Copia's heart in the best possible way.

Chapter Text

Copia sat in his office, his back and shoulders aching from sitting all day. For the moment he ignored the pile of paperwork on his desk, instead scrolling on his computer. The band had just posted a new picture, from the latest ritual, and even though he would never admit it, he was intently looking at every single one, each day. He missed being on tour himself. He realized that from being in the ministry all the time, without anything to do besides sitting at his desk and work his way through the endless pile of paperwork, he was slowly getting out of shape. His belly had a bit more pudge to it than before, and his back would crack when getting out of bed in the mornings. But it was also a state of mind - he missed the adrenaline coursing through his veins before going on stage, he missed hearing the roaring of the crowd, and he even missed the cramped up tour busses.

Being so lost in thoughts he almost didn't realize that one of the ghouls was yet again not seen on any of the photos. The stage still had his pedestal, even the mic stand, but Swiss was missing. This was already the third show in a row. Copia couldn't deny the uncomfortable feeling crawling up his back, settling heavily on his chest. He was incredibly worried. He missed all his ghouls dearly, but seeing Swiss wasn't on stage with the others made him worry. Was he sick? Did the new Papa have any problems with him? Not knowing anything specific made him sick to his stomach. But at the same time, he didn't want to call Perpetua. He didn't want to talk with that idiot who took his place. And at the same time he also didn't feel like calling the ghouls - they were all probably very happy and having fun. They didn't need 'Frater Imperator' calling and nagging them.

And Swiss? Swiss was sitting the car on his way back to the ministry. His heart still felt heavy with the pain of leaving two of the things he loved most behind - his pack and his place in the band. He had to admit, that as he sat in the car, watching the scenery pass by, he did regret it a little bit. He already missed having all of his mates around him, he missed the usual chaos that came with being on a tour bus all day. But he had to remind himself why he was doing this. Copia. Ever since the band had left to go on tour, Swiss couldn't stop thinking about the way Copia had looked the morning they had left. He had looked so broken, so left out and disappointed. He couldn't bear having fun out on tour while knowing his Frater was back home, all alone and probably aching to be back on the road.

When he had announced to the others that he would give up on his role in the band, to leave and go back to the ministry and support Copia, the others had been shocked, including V. They all knew that Swiss loved his place in the band. It was his whole personality - it was every ghoul's purpose to be up on stage and spread the name of their lord. And hearing that their multi ghoul was giving up on it, sacrificing himself to support their old papa... it was tough, shocking even, but they had respect for that decision. They knew it wasn't easy, but it was very honorable. He grabbed the seatbelt tightly as he remembered the other's reactions. The way Dew had been almost angry with him, the way Rain had begged him not to leave and the way Phantom had given him a long hug without saying a word.

Perpetua had just stood to the side, giving the ghouls their moment of saying goodbye. Swiss had almost felt selfish, and he still did, for leaving his loved ones behind. But was he really selfish? Sacrificing what he loved most was such a selfless act. Since leaving he hadn't dared checking their group chat. What if they were all angry with him now that he was gone? Would they kick him out of the pack? No, that was just a stupid thought. They never kicked out Sunny or Aether for leaving. And besides... he wouldn't be gone forever. He just left the tour, that was it. He closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh. He just had to remind himself that he would see Copia soon enough. Once he was holding him in his arms, he would remember why he did all this. Then things would be okay again.

By the time Swiss arrived at the ministry, it was long past midnight. Copia was already in his chambers, dressed in something comfy and trying to sleep since two hours - but unable to do so. Since the ghouls left, he had immense trouble finding sleep, and it began to show. He tossed and turned, trying out every damn position, but no matter what he did, sleep didn't come to him. And then, in the quiet of his room, a soft knock echoed off the walls. He had almost thought he had only imagined it, and yet he sat up and stared at the door in confusion. But then it came again, so he stood up and cautiously made his way across the room. Almost hesitantly he opened the door, and he was shocked to see his beloved multi ghoul on the other side.

There was a moment of charged silence, the usual cocky and wild ghoul standing there timidly and unsure of what to say. "What... are you doing here?" Copia asked, half out of breath, feeling as if the sight of Swiss had knocked any air out of his lungs. "I came home," Swiss replied with a small smile, "I know I'm probably the last one you expected to see... but I couldn't ignore it. I needed to be here - with you." "Did Perpetua made you leave? Did- did that fucking idiot kick you out? I swear to lucifer that if he did-" Swiss quickly interrupted him, giving a small, slightly choked chuckle, "no... no Copia. He didn't throw me out. Leaving was my own decision. I know you need someone... and I want to be that someone."

Copia stared at him in shock, at a loss for words. He felt a lump form in his throat, shaking his head as if he was still dreaming. Tears welled up in his eyes, daring to fall, but he tried to hold them back, swallow them down. "W- why?" Swiss sighed, carefully stepping closer and making Copia stumble back a little. He closed the door behind them and then carefully embraced the Frater in a gentle hug. "Because... because I care for you. So fucking much. I couldn't stand being out there with your brother, while you sit here, all alone, with no one to talk to and nothing to do." Copia immediately melted into the hug, pressing his head against Swiss' chest, listening intently to his steady heartbeat. It was strangely grounding him into the moment, into the knowledge that Swiss was really here.

"But... but you love the stage," he choked out. "I do," Swiss confirmed, voice low and gentle, his nose nuzzling into Copia's hair, "but none of it matters when you're not there with me. The stage is just light and noise... you're home." He instinctively held Copia a little tighter as he felt a gut-wrenching sob shaking him. He scooped him ups into his arms and carried him over to the bed. He sat down, placing Copia down and quickly taking his boots off before he could settle down beside him. "Come here, I want some cuddles," the ghoul whispered, and without hesitation the human man snuggled up to his side. For a while they were quiet, just lying in the dark of the night, letting the silence engulf them. Copia cried for a bit, but settled down quite quickly.

"Will you really stay? You won't go back to join them?" Swiss could hear the fear and worry in his partner's voice - the sheer desperation. It broke his heart, and made him tighten his hold on him. One hand cradled into his hair, gently stroking through the strands. "Of course I will stay... I gave up this tour for a reason, okay? I can't just go back and leave you behind again." A soft hum came from Copia, and Swiss could practically feel the way the tension slowly left his body. It eased the tension on his chest a little, that his sacrifice at least seemed to do good on the Frater. With his head on Swiss' chest, Copia's exhaustion finally caught up with him, and he slowly drifted off to sleep to the steady heartbeat against his ear. For the first time in weeks, Copia slept through the night - with a warm body beside him, and a heart finally at ease.