Work Text:
The car was low on gas and the sun had completely dipped below the horizon, which made it a good time to stop for the night.
It had taken nearly half an hour for Bill to carry Ava from the alleyway to where his car was. It had slowed them down drastically, but once she wrapped her arms around his neck and cried against his shoulder, he just couldn't bring himself to put her down. They made it through Nevada (pushing the speed limit just a bit ) and a little less than a quarter into Utah. He didn't entirely know where they were going, just as far away from anyone who wanted to hurt Ava as possible. But for now, they could use some dinner and a bed for the night, Bill decided. He took the nearest exit and glanced over at Ava.
Ava . She was leaning against the passenger side window, eyes drooping as she looked out at the lights that were blurring past her. The car wasn’t the most comfortable- the AC only worked 25% of the time and the ride wasn’t smooth, but she was having a much better time than when they went on the run after the fall of SHIELD. Back then, she had to use so much energy to keep herself from phasing out of her seat, and then she got carsick and it was just not a good day. Bill shuddered at the memories. Now, her arms were wrapped around herself, loosely gripping her suit. She took slow breaths and occasionally winced and dammit , he remembered that her rib was at best bruised and at worst completely cracked.
“Where are we going?” Ava asked blearily, lifting her head just a bit to look at him.
He cracked the smallest smile towards her. “How about something to eat and a bed for the night?”
Ava looked at him for a moment, eyes distrusting. He watched it fade out the longer she held his gaze. Finally she returned her head to the window. “Okay.”
He put his eyes back on the road and it wasn’t long before they were in a quiet town that didn’t have much more than a gas station and a McDonalds. It would do nicely. Ava didn’t move when they came to a stop, but she wasn’t asleep. She looked around the little gas station instead, scanning for threats and the violence that had burrowed itself into her bones. Bill reached out and gave her an affirming shoulder touch.
“I’ll just be a minute,” he told her as he grabbed his wallet and opened the car door.
“Famous last words,” she murmured, but her eyes briefly fell closed under his touch.
Despite this, she watched him diligently while he filled the shitty old Ford Escape. Some getaway car , he thought. He was just lucky the card reader on the machine actually worked. Climbing back into the vehicle, he heard Ava breathe out deeply.
“See? Not dead.” Bill joked, trying to get a smile out of her. Ava only looked at him and rolled her eyes. He chuckled to himself. “Worth a shot.”
…
The motel was… dingy. And that was putting it nicely.
They had a room on the first floor, which Bill was thankful for. Ava was still stumbling a little bit even if she tried to keep her gait stable and didn’t complain at all. He kept his left arm around her shoulders while she held the bag of fast food and he opened the room with the key. It smelt like moth balls and the radiator croaked like a beg to be put out of its misery. Inside, there wasn’t a lot to write home about- and there was only one bed. As much as he wanted to spoil her, he was trying to keep the spending to strictly necessary expenses. The less attention they brought to themselves the better. Ava didn't appear to mind the circumstances as she set the food down on the small desk and gingerly fell down onto the mattress. He heard her whine at the impact on her injuries and she sunk into it like she was unsure if she would just fall through. When it remained steady against her back, she smiled.
For a moment, he just stood there and observed her. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, melting into it. It couldn’t have been very comfortable but to her it was like a five star resort after all the nights she slept in the chamber.
She was solid .
They had both dreamed of this day. He spent decades trying to find a way to make her comfortable, to keep her present, alive, tangible. There were so many nights where Ava cried because she was untouchable and it hurt . But here she was, finally starfished out in a bad motel bed and not phasing through the blankets.
Bill dropped a duffel bag he was carrying down into the single chair in the room. Ava lifted her head a little bit to peek at it.
“A go bag,” he told her without her having to ask. “Just in case.”
Ava hummed in understanding. She lifted her hand up in front of her face and stared at her glove. Bill began to rifle through the bag until he found some of Ava’s clothes, just a pair of flannel pajama pants and a tank top. He smiled at the thought that she would never have to wear that damned suit again; she could hang out in casual clothes and feel like any other twenty-something girl.
When he turned back to Ava, she had pulled off her glove and was staring at her hand. It wasn’t shimmering like she was used to. She couldn't see the ceiling above her through her own flesh and when she flexed her fingers they only moved in one direction. She was trapped deep in her thoughts and the expression on her face wasn’t entirely pleasant.
Bill cleared his throat and Ava turned to look like a puppy being given a command. Her face was a little dazed but she was listening despite her exhaustion. He held out the bundle of new clothes and gave her a warm smile.
“Welcome to tangibility. Go get changed.”
…
Bill was 98% sure that the right side of Ava’s ribcage was only bruised.
Okay, maybe more like 95%.
She was sitting criss-cross in the middle of the bed, eyes fixed on the TV as Bill ran his fingers along her injured side. He was ever so gentle, keeping his touch featherlight. Ava gripped the blanket below her as he examined her. A first aid kit sat in front of her, mostly well stocked. Hank used to call him an overpacker, a prepper even, but it came in handy.
“You’re going to be fine, kiddo,” he said after they had sat in relative silence for fifteen minutes. He applied some tape onto her skin to help support her bones throughout the night. For once, Bill was thankful her suit was overengineered by SHIELD. “You just need to take it easy.”
Ava gave a weary nod. Her blinks were getting slower and stickier as she kept her eyes trained on the TV like she would cry if she looked at him. Bill ran his hand from the top of her head down to her shoulder and gave it a gentle rub. She had changed clothes, washed her face, and eaten enough chicken nuggets to sustain her for the night. She made no move to lay down even though she looked exhausted.
His girl had always been stubborn.
He sighed and climbed off the bed, careful not to jostle her. He busied himself with turning off the bathroom light and desk light, leaving only the bedside lamp light on. Bill came back to the bed and left his slippers at the edge as he folded down the covers. When he looked up, Ava was pouting at him.
“I'm getting ready for bed, if you would like to join me.”
Ava seemed to think about it for a minute before she slowly crawled over to the other side of the mattress. She ungracefully kicked the blankets down towards the footboard before throwing herself face down against the pillow. Bill couldn't help but smile fondly. He flicked off the TV and it hummed softly for several moments before going dark.
Bill took Ava hiding her face as the perfect opportunity to retrieve something he had picked up on their way out of town. It had been risky to stop at the house, but he couldn't leave the things she loved behind. He fished around the bottom of the duffle bag until he pulled out a small white bear. He smiled lovingly at it in his hands, worn and tattered but still holding up. He returned to the bed.
He settled beside her and reached out to rub her back gently. Ava made a small noise of contentment, too tired to form words. She hadn't even pulled the covers up over herself. Bill took it upon himself to do it for her, tenderly laying the stark white top sheet, fuzzy tan blanket, and fluffy comforter on top of her still body one at a time.
Once she was sufficiently tucked in, Bill laid the bear next to her head. He turned to the table beside the bed and picked up the pamphlet that looked like it hadn't been opened since it was printed. The cover read EXPLORE UTAH overtop an artistic rendering of the desert. He snorted lightly at the imagery of exploring miles and miles of scorching desert.
Just as he was opening it for some extremely light reading before bed, Ava shifted. He looked over and found her peeking out from behind her hair, face still mostly smashed into the pillow. Her eyes landed on the bear. Bill watched as she grabbed onto it with a trembling hand and pulled it closer to her until she was hugging it against her chest. Her eyes quickly began to flood with tears.
“Ava? You alright there, girlie?” he asked softly. Bill closed the pamphlet and set it down on his lap.
“I’m c-ured,” Ava responded, voice breaking with thinly gated sobs. She squeezed the bear impossibly tight, like she couldn't believe that it wasn't tumbling through her fingers.
Bill smiled at her sadly, then opened his arms. Ava moved stiffly as though she seemed unsure of her own body, but she practically dove into his embrace. He worried about her injuring her ribs farther, but after two decades of constant pain he imagined she didn’t care. The girl slotted against him perfectly, her cheek pressed against his chest and her fingers gripping his shirt like a life line. Her other hand kept an iron grip on her bear.
“I’ve got you Ava, I’ve got you,” he assured her softly, rubbing circles on her back. He squeezed her a little tighter just to prove that she was still solid. The tears flowed down her face but his shirt dried them even as more came. There weren't enough words in the world to help her cope, so Bill just kept holding her.
He was in just as much disbelief as she was. Hugs had been rare between them up until this point, with the strength it took for Ava to remain tangible under pressure. As badly as he wanted to cradle her every time she cried from a nightmare or was breaking down in frustration, the most he could ever do was sit beside her and tell her stories.
But she was here now, real and in his arms.
It wasn't long before her exhaustion caught up to her and her sobs tapered off into soft little whines. She was limp in his arms and Bill treasured the feeling.
“Would you like a story, kiddo?” he asked gently, squeezing her elbow. Ava nodded and sniffled. She curled in tighter on herself, her head resting over his heart while his left arm cradled her and his right arm moved down to hold her free hand, rubbing circles on her palm.
He began telling her favorite story. It was about a duck he had found when he was a boy that he had raised for a summer and hid from his parents. He trained it to do tricks for breadcrumbs and eventually released it into the local park to wreak havoc on the neighborhood. He had been telling it to Ava ever since she was in the orphanage, and every time he added new details until neither of them were sure what was fact and what was fiction.
Bill had barely gotten to the duck’s first walk on a leash when he glanced down and found Ava sound asleep.
Her cheeks were rosy and her bottom lip was stuck out ever so slightly to make her look completely at peace. She was fully relaxed and comfortable in a way she hadn't been maybe ever under his watch. Her breathing was steady, her grip on the bear was loose but unyielding, and her face was still damp with tears. He thought about wiping it away but he didn't dare disturb her.
Bill kept her securely held in his arm, but he shifted slightly so she was laying more on the bed and less in his lap. This way, he could stroke her hair with a free hand. It had fallen out of its ponytails slightly and was most accurately described as some kind of nest, but it was soft. It couldn't vanish in his grasp anymore.
He spent a long time like this, petting her hair and just studying her face like it was the last time he would see her. The world had tried so hard to knock Ava down, and Bill had fought so hard to keep her up. And here she was, ending up on top.
He didn't think it was possible to be prouder of his girl.
Bill rubbed her back in one last comforting circle before he turned out the lights and settled down himself, keeping her close. She didn't even stir and he wondered if he would have to carry her to the car in the morning so she could keep sleeping.
Even with the lamp turned off he couldn’t stop watching her under the moonlight that seeped in from the paper-thin curtains. She was safe, loved, cared for, and solid. That was all he had ever wanted. But he never could have imagined how healed he would feel too. In the darkness of their dingy little motel with the noisy radiator and ancient TV, with the elusive Ava Starr finally curled up in his hug, Bill realized something.
Janet van Dyne didn't just save Ava; she saved him too.