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Drunken Dudes

Summary:

Just two drunken men wandering the streets of Konoha after celebrating their latest success—until they stumbled upon a young, injured girl in the shadows of an alley.
Moments later, they were the ones getting hurt—only for the frightened girl to immediately begin nursing their wounds.

What began as a chaotic misunderstanding soon turned into something deeper.

Watch how these two unlikely shinobi slowly grow attached to the mysterious girl—learning her story, earning her trust, and ultimately becoming the guardians she never knew she needed.

Chapter 1: Chocolate

Chapter Text

Kamizuki Izumo, alongside his rival and best friend Hagane Kotetsu, strolled through the quiet streets of Konoha under the soft glow of the moonlight. They were still giddy from the celebration of their shared achievement—both of them having just earned the title of Chūnin.

Their arms slung around each other's shoulders, laughter erupted from them like old times at the Academy. They didn’t care how loud they were—tonight was their night. Passersby gave them a wide berth, recognizing the two well-known shinobi… and perhaps not wanting to get caught in their drunken antics.

After a few more steps, Izumo’s laughter suddenly stopped.

“Hey…” he muttered, pausing in place, brows furrowed.

“What?” Kotetsu blinked, confused by the sudden change in his friend’s mood.

Izumo tilted his head, listening closely. “Did you hear that?”

“Hear what?” Kotetsu replied, glancing around.

“Someone’s crying, you idiot!” Izumo snapped, pushing Kotetsu off his shoulder with a frustrated grunt.

Kotetsu stumbled and chuckled, rubbing his arm. “Tch, maybe it’s a ghost,” he joked, his voice light despite the eerie shift in the air.

Izumo didn’t laugh. Instead, he turned toward the sound, his senses sharpening as he moved with more caution now. It was faint, but definitely there—soft, broken sobs coming from the shadows of a nearby alley.

He motioned for Kotetsu to follow, his drunken haze fading quickly into alertness. The two Chūnin crept closer to the alley’s entrance, where the crying became clearer… more real.

Then they saw her.

A small girl, no older than six, sat curled into herself, her body trembling. Her clothes were torn, her face streaked with dirt and blood. One leg was wrapped tightly in a strip of cloth that was rapidly soaking through. She looked up at them, terrified.

Before either man could speak, she flinched—then lashed out with shocking speed.

Izumo barely dodged the first hit. Kotetsu wasn't as lucky—he took a direct palm to the gut, knocking the air out of him as he hit the ground.

“W-Wait—!” Izumo stumbled, raising his hands. “We’re not here to hurt you!”

The girl stopped, panting, her chest heaving as her wild, tear-filled eyes scanned the two strangers warily. Her small body trembled, muscles coiled and ready to strike again if they made the wrong move.

Kotetsu wheezed, doubled over with one hand on his stomach. “She… hits harder than you, Izumo…” he croaked, his voice ragged.

Izumo rolled his eyes but didn’t respond to the jab. Instead, he slowly lowered himself to one knee, keeping his hands visible and his tone gentle. “Hey… it’s okay. You’re safe now. We’re not going to hurt you.”

The girl didn’t speak. Her shoulders quivered harder, her gaze darting between the two like a cornered animal. Her clothes were tattered, her face smudged with blood and grime, and her lip trembled. It was clear—she hadn’t eaten or slept in days.

Suddenly, without warning, Kotetsu keeled over and started vomiting beside them, the sound sharp and wet in the silent alley.

Izumo recoiled instinctively. “Oh, kami—ugh! Seriously?!”

The girl panicked, her eyes widening in horror as she stumbled toward Kotetsu. “I-I’m sorry!” she sobbed, her voice breaking. “I didn’t mean to hurt him that bad—I didn’t know—I’m sorry!”

She reached for him with trembling hands, unsure what to do, her little body wracked with guilt and fear. When Kotetsu groaned and collapsed to the ground, her panic intensified. Hot tears streamed down her cheeks as she looked helplessly from him to Izumo.

“That idiot,” Izumo muttered, trying to step toward Kotetsu—only to misjudge his balance and trip over his own foot. In the same motion, his shoulder clipped a stack of wooden planks leaning against the alley wall.

Crash!

The boards tumbled, clattering loudly as they fell in an ungraceful heap—on top of both Chūnin.

There was a brief pause.

“…Ow,” came Izumo’s muffled groan from under the pile of debris.

The little girl’s eyes widened in horror. She covered her mouth with her tiny hands, shaking her head. “N-no! No no no!” she wailed.

In a flurry of motion, she turned and bolted from the alley, her bare feet slapping against the pavement. She ran as fast as her sore legs could carry her—back to her apartment, a crumbling little unit tucked behind a dilapidated building.

Inside, she threw open the wooden drawer she’d hidden beneath her bed. From within, she pulled out a small, hand-sewn medical pouch, old and fraying at the edges.

The old man Hokage who always came to check on her, had given it to her a year ago—“just in case,” he had said with a smile. She had promised herself she’d only use it if she were badly hurt again.

But tonight… the old men needed it more.

Clutching the kit to her chest, she whispered, “Please be okay,” and darted back into the night.

Kotetsu and Izumo stirred awake, groaning as pain shot through their bodies. Everything ached—especially their backs and heads. At least their consciousness had returned.

Izumo sat up first, wincing from the sharp pain in his lower back. A bandage was wrapped around his forehead, already stained slightly from earlier wounds. He blinked a few times to adjust to the light, then froze as his eyes landed on someone sitting nearby.

A young girl sat a few feet away, half-asleep but clearly aware of them. Her clothes were rumpled, eyes puffy. Blonde hair framed her dirt-smudged face, and her blue eyes shimmered with guilt. Whisker-like marks on her cheeks gave her identity away instantly.

"Ugh..." Kotetsu groaned beside him, slowly turning his head toward the girl. As his gaze sharpened, recognition dawned on his face. He squinted, then muttered, “Hey... isn’t she that monster everyone talks about?”

Izumo didn’t even hesitate—he smacked Kotetsu hard on the head. “IDIOT,” he hissed under his breath.

The girl flinched at the word “monster,” lowering her head like a scolded child. She looked like a kicked puppy, trying to make herself smaller. The pain in her expression was more piercing than any wound.

“Shut up, will you? She’s harmless,” Izumo scolded in a quiet but firm tone, glaring at his partner. He glanced back at the girl, his expression softening. There was something about her—fragile, despite the power she clearly held.

Kotetsu groaned, rubbing the spot Izumo hit, but his gaze shifted back to the girl. He took a breath, then spoke in an unexpectedly gentle voice.

“Ne... What’s your name?” he asked, offering a small smile. After all, the punch she gave them earlier had been no joke—she was strong, but now she looked completely broken.

The girl’s hands clutched her shirt tightly, her voice trembling with emotion.

“I know what you guys are... you already know me. Don’t act like I’m stupid,” she snapped, but her voice cracked at the end. Tears brimmed in her eyes. “I’m Uzumaki Naruto... the ‘monster’ everyone hates.”

The guilt hit Kotetsu like a kunai to the chest. “Ah... how pitiful,” he muttered, then—before he could think better of it—reached forward and hugged her while crying.

Naruto’s body stiffened in surprise, not used to this kind of contact. Her fists remained clenched between them, unsure how to react.

“Hey! Kotetsu, what are you doing? You’re making her uncomfortable!” Izumo yelped, trying to pry his friend off her.

But Naruto didn’t push Kotetsu away. Instead, her hands slowly relaxed, and for the first time in what felt like forever, her lips curved into a tiny, genuine smile. She couldn’t remember the last time someone had hugged her... or looked at her like she was human.

After a few moments, Izumo finally managed to pull Kotetsu back. The two of them sat across from Naruto, who now looked more confused than sad.

There was an awkward silence before Kotetsu chuckled sheepishly. “Guess we started off on the wrong foot. Let’s try this again. I’m Hagane Kotetsu.”

Izumo nodded. “And I’m Kamizuki Izumo. We’re... kind of a mess right now, but we’re also shinobi. It’s nice to meet you, Naruto.”

Naruto blinked, a bit startled by the formality—but also strangely touched.

“Nice to meet you... I guess,” she mumbled.

For the first time in a long while, the ache in her chest seemed just a little lighter.

The night was quiet—blessedly so. No footsteps echoed through this forgotten part of the alley, and the darkness seemed to shield them from the world’s cruel eyes. No streetlamps reached here; it was like the shadows were giving them a moment of peace.

Suddenly, the silence was broken by a loud, grumbling sound.

Naruto's eyes widened in embarrassment. She quickly turned her face away, clutching her stomach, as if doing so might silence it.

"You haven’t eaten yet?" Kotetsu asked gently, beating Izumo to the question.

Naruto’s cheeks flushed red, and she stared down at the ground, shame tightening her throat. Her voice came out small and cracked.

“...Yes.”

There was a brief pause.

“Why?” Izumo asked next, kneeling a little closer. “Kids like you should be eating a lot. You need the energy to grow strong.”

Naruto didn’t answer right away. Her hands clenched the hem of her shirt tightly. Finally, in a whisper that sounded far too broken for someone so young, she said:

“They won’t let me.”

“‘They’?” both men asked in unison, brows furrowed.

“The villagers... They won’t let me buy anything,” she admitted. Her voice trembled. “They say I don’t deserve it. And if they do sell me something... it’s always rotten. Or already expired.”

Naruto bit her lip, as if trying to hold back the tears that were already threatening to fall. She hadn't had a proper meal in days—weeks, really. The only time she ever ate well was when the Old Man Hokage came by, and even those visits were rare.

Kotetsu’s jaw clenched as he looked at her—really looked at her. Pale skin. Hollow cheeks. Thin arms barely filling out her shirt.

“That’s why you’re so thin...” he muttered under his breath, before clicking his tongue in frustration. The anger bubbled in his chest like fire, but he kept it buried. He didn’t want to scare her. No child deserved this—especially not one who looked at them with such hope, even after all the cruelty she’d endured.

Without a word, Izumo stood up and walked off into the shadows.

Naruto’s heart dropped instantly. She turned to Kotetsu, her voice panicked. “He’s leaving… isn’t he? Just like everyone else…”

Kotetsu shook his head quickly, giving her a reassuring smile as he gently patted her head. “Nah. He’ll be back. He’s probably off to punch a vendor or something.”

She blinked, confused—but still uncertain.

Moments later, Izumo returned, breathing slightly heavier than before. In one hand, he held a warm takeout box. The smell of grilled chicken and rice filled the alley. In the other hand, he carried two cans of beer for himself and Kotetsu, and a small bottle of fruit juice for Naruto.

Naruto stared in disbelief.

With a smile that was both gentle and a little awkward, Izumo knelt down beside her. “You wouldn’t mind if we stayed at your place for a bit, right? Naruto-chan?”

She froze.

The question struck her harder than she expected. Her whole life, she had been turned away—rejected, cursed, hated. And now... these two strangers were asking to stay with her?

Slowly, her lips curled into a smile so bright it made Kotetsu’s chest ache. The warmth in her expression cut through the cold of the alley, and for a second, it felt like the stars were watching them, quietly approving.

Naruto nodded quickly and grabbed both their hands with a strength that surprised them, tugging them down the street toward her apartment.

She knew better than to trust people.

But somehow, she also knew—these two were different.

Ever since that fateful encounter in the alley, Izumo and Kotetsu had grown unexpectedly fond of Naruto. Their daily visits to her small apartment became routine—almost like a new mission. They made sure she ate properly, rested enough, and even played with her when she seemed lonely.

The transformation in Naruto was remarkable. From a fragile, starving child to a lively, healthy six-year-old, she flourished under their quiet care. Her cheeks were fuller now, and her bright blue eyes sparkled with a newfound hope.

Unbeknownst to them, their actions hadn’t gone unnoticed. An Anbu operative, watching discreetly from the shadows, reported everything to the Hokage. After careful consideration, the Hokage decided to entrust these two Chunin with the responsibility of looking after Naruto—for her own protection and growth.

“Ne, Izumo,” Kotetsu called out, leaning against the doorframe of Naruto’s modest kitchen. The small room was tidy and warm, a stark contrast to the cold streets she once wandered.

“Hmm?” Izumo responded without turning, busy stirring something on the stove.

Kotetsu smiled, watching Naruto happily play on the floor with a toy he had gifted her a few days ago—a small wooden ninja figure. It was a simple gesture, but one that seemed to bring her genuine joy.

“Do you think Naru-chan is old enough to enter the Academy yet?” Kotetsu asked, kneeling down to ruffle Naruto’s hair gently.

Izumo paused, wiping his hands on a cloth before turning around to look at the lively girl. She was taller and sturdier than when they first met—a far cry from the fragile five-year-old they almost mistook for a toddler.

With a nod, Izumo smiled softly. “Yeah, I think she’s ready. Oy, Kotetsu—grab some plates and set the table, will ya?”

Kotetsu grinned and headed toward the dining area, the warm scent of simmering food filling the air. Soft laughter echoed through the cozy apartment—the kind of laughter Naruto had only ever dreamed of. It was a quiet happiness, the beginnings of a family she never had but was slowly, cautiously starting to trust.

“Ah, I’m so excited for your first day at the Academy,” Kotetsu said cheerfully, placing three plates on the small table.

“Eh?! Really!?” Naruto’s eyes lit up, her mouth forming a wide ‘O’ before she ran up to him, practically bouncing with excitement. She gripped the edge of the table for balance as she jumped in place.

“I’m going to the Academy! For real!?” she asked, breathless.

“Yes, yes! Are you excited too?” Kotetsu chuckled, crouching down to match her energy.

“YES!!” Naruto squealed, throwing her arms up. Her smile was so bright it could've outshone the morning sun.

That day, lunch felt different. It was alive with laughter, noise, and the unmistakable buzz of anticipation. For once, Naruto wasn’t just surviving—she was living.

When the first day of the Academy finally came, Kotetsu and Izumo walked Naruto there, just like other parents did with their children. They didn’t want her to feel left out, standing alone while the rest had someone to see them off.

Naruto held their hands tightly, skipping every few steps, her tiny sandals tapping excitedly against the road. She beamed up at them, her voice full of awe.

“Ne, ne! Do you think I’ll get to learn jutsu today?”

“Maybe not today, but soon,” Izumo replied with a rare, soft smile. “Just pay attention and don’t punch anyone... unless they really deserve it.”

Naruto laughed, nodding hard. “Hai, sensei!”

Kotetsu wiped at the corner of his eye dramatically. “Our little Naru-chan’s all grown up. Going to the big scary Academy. So proud—” he sniffled.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Izumo muttered with a sigh, though the corner of his mouth tugged upward.

As they reached the Academy gates, the buzz of other children and parents filled the air. Children from powerful clans stood together—Uchiha, Hyūga, Nara, Yamanaka—all clean and polished in their clan colors. Naruto almost looks like she was one of them, wearing the outfit the two gave her and an excited grin.

Then, from just behind them, quiet but unmistakable whispers floated through the air.

“Hey... isn’t that the jinchūriki?”

“I think so,” another woman whispered back. “Ugh, I wouldn’t want my child near her.”

“Better to keep a distance. You never know with that thing.”

Kotetsu stiffened, his smile frozen on his face. A vein in his forehead pulsed.

He slowly turned to look at the two women, eyes sharp and cold beneath the curve of his usual grin. The fury behind them was unmistakable.

“Ne, Izumo,” he whispered under his breath. “What did they just say about Naru-chan?”

Izumo noticed the twitch in his best friend’s jaw and quickly placed a hand on Kotetsu’s shoulder. “Oy, don’t. Not here.”

“But—” Kotetsu hissed.

“It’s her first day,” Izumo cut in calmly, tightening his grip. “Don’t ruin it. Don’t give them more reason to whisper.”

Kotetsu clenched his fists, the smile still plastered on his face, though it was no longer warm. “If they weren’t moms, I swear...”

“I know,” Izumo said quietly. “I know.”

Thankfully, Naruto remained blissfully unaware, her attention fixed on the Academy building, stars in her eyes. She didn’t see the glares. She didn’t hear the whispers.

“Come on!” she beamed, grabbing their hands again. “Let’s go! I want to see my classroom!”

As she pulled them forward, both men followed her, protecting her not just with their presence—but with silent, unwavering resolve.

They couldn’t shield her from everything.

But they could stand with her, every step of the way.

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“Kotetsu-san! Izumo-san!” Naruto's voice rang out across the training field as she sprinted toward them, beaming. Her long blonde hair bounced behind her, tied up in a messy ponytail, and in her hands was a test paper proudly held up like a trophy.

“Look!” she grinned wide, waving the sheet in front of them. “I got a perfect score! Iruka-sensei gave me full marks!”

Kotetsu and Izumo had just returned from a short mission, dust still clinging to their uniforms. They barely had time to relax when their little ball of sunshine came running at them full force.

“Naru-chan! Whoa—you did amazing!” Kotetsu beamed, immediately wrapping her up in one of his signature bear hugs, lifting her slightly off the ground. “So proud of you!”

Izumo, more composed as always, smirked and ruffled her hair with a quiet, “Good job, kid.”

Naruto practically glowed. Compliments like these meant everything to her—especially from them.

It had been almost four years since that day in the alley. She was nine now, healthier, stronger, and brighter than she had ever been. Her apartment, once bare and cold, was now warm and full of little gifts from her two self-appointed big brothers. And groceries? That was never her job anymore—not since the last time someone tried selling her expired food. Izumo had nearly lost it that day, and Naruto had never seen a vendor pack up so fast.

“How about this,” Izumo said with a grin, slinging an arm over Kotetsu’s shoulder. “Why don’t we celebrate? Treat Naru-chan to some Ichiraku?”

“Ramen?!” Naruto’s eyes sparkled. “Yes, please!”

Kotetsu gasped dramatically, placing a hand over his heart. “Our Naru-chan… getting perfect scores… next thing we know, she’ll have boys lining up to confess to her!”

He started to fake sob, wiping away imaginary tears.

Izumo, who had been mid-smile, froze.

Right. Boys. That was going to happen eventually. Naruto was already growing up—cute, bright, and spirited. It wouldn't be long before she started attracting attention.

He looked at Kotetsu. Kotetsu looked at him.

In an instant, they both nodded—an unspoken pact forming between them.

Operation: Protect Naru-chan from Horny Idiots was now in effect.

Kotetsu straightened up, serious for once. “No one touches our little sister.”

Izumo cracked his knuckles. “No one.”

They shook hands firmly, already strategizing on how to scare off any future admirers who dared lay a hand—or even thoughts—on Naruto.

Naruto, who had been watching them with wide eyes, tilted her head in confusion. “Uhm… Kotetsu-san? Izumo-san…?”

She blinked.

“…Why are you two holding hands?”

They quickly let go, both clearing their throats and stepping apart like nothing happened.

“Just... brotherly love,” Kotetsu said too quickly.

“War bonding,” Izumo muttered.

Naruto raised an eyebrow. She knew they were close, but sometimes… she really wondered.

Still, she laughed and grabbed both their arms, tugging them toward the familiar smell of Ichiraku.

“Come on! Ramen’s waiting!”

As they walked together—Kotetsu already joking, Izumo smiling quietly, and Naruto humming happily—none of them noticed the few glances they got from passing villagers. Some were curious. Some cautious.

But none of it mattered.

Naruto wasn't alone anymore.

She had them—and she was finally becoming everything she was always meant to be.

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Naruto was twelve when she walked up to Kotetsu and Izumo that day.

There was no bright smile on her face. No excited sprint toward them. No hug. Just a quiet, slouched walk—her shoulders heavy, her eyes red and tired.

Kotetsu's heart sank. Something was wrong. Terribly wrong.

Without saying a word, the two men fell in step behind her, exchanging a worried glance. Izumo nudged Kotetsu slightly, silently asking: What happened?

“Naru-chan…” Izumo spoke up gently, his voice filled with concern. “Is something wrong?”

Naruto stopped. Her small hands curled into trembling fists by her side. Slowly, she turned to look at them, tears spilling from her eyes.

“I... I failed...” she whispered, her voice cracking. “They said I won’t be able to graduate.”

Kotetsu froze. “W-What do you mean?!”

“You have perfect marks!” Izumo added, stunned. “You’re one of the top students in theory! You’re smart, Naru-chan!”

Naruto shook her head, tears now flowing freely. “I… I can’t do a proper Clone Jutsu,” she sobbed. “They said graduation is based on skill… not grades. It doesn’t matter how smart I am. If I can’t do the jutsu, I fail.”

Kotetsu crouched down immediately, his expression soft and panicked. “That’s not fair! You’ve worked so hard! You’re more than just one stupid jutsu!”

Izumo clenched his jaw. It was their fault too. They had trained her in taijutsu, theory, survival skills—but they hadn’t focused enough on the academy's strict criteria. They never thought her chakra control would hold her back like this.

“Try again,” Kotetsu said, gently placing a hand on her shoulder. “Tomorrow. That’s right. We’ll help you tonight. You can do it, Naru-chan. We believe in you!”

But Naruto only shook her head again. She lightly pushed his hand away, shoulders slumping further as she turned and walked toward her apartment. Defeated.

That night, the news hit them like a thunderclap.

Uzumaki Naruto had stolen the Forbidden Scroll.

Kotetsu and Izumo rushed to the Hokage’s office when they heard. Iruka was already there, pale and shaken—but smiling.

“I thought she’d been tricked… by Mizuki,” Iruka said, his voice hoarse. “But she learned the Shadow Clone Jutsu from the scroll. Perfectly. Dozens of them. She used it to beat Mizuki to a pulp.”

“What?!” Izumo gasped, eyes wide.

“She used the Shadow Clone Jutsu?” Kotetsu blinked, speechless.

Iruka nodded. “I passed her right there. She earned it.”

Later that night, they found Naruto sitting by the edge of the training ground, curled up, head resting on her knees. She looked so small.

“Naru-chan...” Kotetsu called out softly, his tone unusually serious.

Izumo grew tense. He thought Kotetsu was about to scold her. “O-Oy, Kotetsu, don’t be too harsh, she was tricked—”

But Kotetsu didn’t scold her.

Instead, he walked over and pulled her into a tight hug, pressing her head against his chest.

“Don’t do that again, okay?” he murmured, stroking her hair. “Don’t go off alone, especially not like that. You scared us…”

Naruto’s lips trembled, guilt welling up again in her chest, but she nodded. “I’m sorry…”

Kotetsu leaned back and looked at her face. “So… I heard from Iruka. Did you win?” he said with a grin.

Naruto blinked in surprise. “Eh?”

Izumo’s brows furrowed. “Kotetsu—what are you—?”

But Kotetsu clapped his hands together in excitement. “Your Shadow Clone! It’s an A-rank technique! You actually did it! Can you show it to us?! Pretty please?”

Naruto hesitated… then stood up slowly. She wiped her eyes, gave a small sniff, and nodded with a proud smile.

“Okay… here goes!”

With a flash of chakra, several perfect shadow clones appeared beside her.

Izumo blinked in awe, jaw dropping. “She… she really pulled it off...”

Iruka, standing a little behind them, let out a long sigh before smiling. “She’s got more potential than anyone realizes. This girl... she’s going to change the world.”

Naruto turned to look at her two big brothers, their proud smiles warming her heart.

She had passed.

She wasn’t alone.

And her story was just beginning.

Chapter 2: Churros

Notes:

Big brother Izumo and Kotetsu. HEHEHE

Two fanfics in one day, I am loosing my mind. Help me guys!
Overprotective and weird duo. (Kotetsu is more weirder.)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Ever since Naruto graduated from the academy, she had started living with Kotetsu and Izumo.

It was Kotetsu’s idea, naturally.

He had dramatically declared, “Siblings should live together!” before dragging Izumo into helping him find a house spacious enough for three. After a few weeks of searching and arguing over bathroom schedules, they’d finally settled into a cozy little place near the training grounds.

Naruto had her own room—something she had never really experienced before—and despite being the youngest, she ruled the roost more than either man would admit.

One afternoon, the front door creaked open, and Naruto’s familiar voice echoed through the hallway.

“I’m home!” she called, placing her sandals neatly on the rack.

“Naru-chan!” Kotetsu beamed, popping his head out from the living room. It had been days since they'd all had time to hang out. Kotetsu and Izumo had been caught up with missions, and Naruto was busy with her new team.

“Hello!! I finally met my sensei!” Naruto said excitedly as she made her way toward him, practically bouncing.

Izumo, who was busy cooking in the kitchen, leaned an ear closer to listen.

“Oh really?” Kotetsu asked, gesturing for her to sit. “Who’d you get?”

Naruto grinned proudly. “My sensei is Hatake Kakashi! And my teammates are Sakura-chan and that teme, Uchiha Sasuke.”

At the mention of Sasuke’s name, Naruto’s expression twisted into a scowl, arms crossed tightly over her chest. Her rivalry with the Uchiha prodigy hadn’t lessened over the years—it had only intensified. If she scored higher than him, she was smug for a week. If he scored higher, she sulked in silence (and sometimes, Izumo had to bribe her with dumplings to cheer her up).

“Ohh… Kakashi, huh?” Izumo called from the kitchen, smiling to himself. “Good old days. You’ll learn a lot under him.”

“Hm?” Kotetsu tilted his head. “Wait… two girls and one boy?”

“Yup!” Naruto chirped as she flopped onto the floor, pulling out her kunai to sharpen them. “They said the academy was short on boys, so they mixed the ratio for one team.”

Kotetsu froze.

Slowly, he turned toward Izumo, his expression growing serious. Grabbing his best friend by both shoulders, he leaned in and whispered urgently, “Did you hear that? One boy. ONE. And it’s that Uchiha brat.”

Izumo sighed, not even looking up from the rice he was fluffing. “Naruto doesn’t see anything special in him, Kotetsu.”

“She doesn’t,” Kotetsu muttered darkly, “but he might see something in her.”

He glanced at Naruto, who was sitting on the tatami mat sharpening her kunai with impressive focus, her brows furrowed in concentration. She had cut her hair recently—shoulder length now—after Izumo had nearly burned the ends trying to style it one morning. Since then, Naruto often arrived at the academy with comically messy hair. Still, somehow, the messy look suited her.

Kotetsu squinted. “She’s grown up too fast… She’s already getting prettier by the day. If anyone touches her, I swear—”

“Don’t forget the Hyuuga kid,” Izumo muttered from behind him, arms crossed.

Kotetsu gasped softly as if struck by lightning. “Him too?! I knew I saw him staring during the weapons test last month!”

“Yup. You can practically smell the awkward teen crush,” Izumo nodded grimly.

They both turned to look at Naruto again. She was still lost in her own little world, sharpening away, mumbling about “beating that Uchiha next time.”

The two men sighed in unison, grateful that she hadn’t heard a word of their paranoid overprotectiveness.

But that moment of peace didn’t last long.

“We need a plan,” Kotetsu whispered, deadly serious. “No boys near Naru-chan unless they pass The Test.”

“What test?”

“We’ll make one.”

“I like where this is going,” Izumo nodded.

From across the room, Naruto blinked and looked up, confused by the intense glances they were giving her.

“Uhm... Kotetsu-san? Izumo-san? Why are you two whispering and glaring like that?”

The two men smiled at her, too wide and too innocent.

“Nothing, Naru-chan!” they said in perfect unison.

Naruto narrowed her eyes. “Weirdos…”

Still, even as she went back to her kunai, a small smile tugged at the corners of her lips. Living with them felt warm, safe… and oddly chaotic.

And she wouldn’t have it any other way.

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“Say, Naru-chan,” Izumo said gently as he settled down at the table with a steaming bowl in hand, “would you tell us what happened at your test today with Kakashi?”

Kotetsu, already halfway through his second helping, gave a dramatic thumbs-up. “Izumo, your food is always the best!” he declared, mouth still full of meat.

Izumo rolled his eyes but couldn’t help smiling. “Chew first. Compliment later.”

Naruto giggled before perking up at the question. “Oh! Right! So—Kakashi-sensei gave us this crazy test!”

Both men leaned in automatically, like it was the most important thing they’d ever heard. Naruto, clearly excited, spoke fast and waved her arms with emphasis.

“He said we’d pass only if we managed to get one of the two bells he had! But there were three of us!” She held up three fingers for dramatic effect, looking at them like it was the most unfair puzzle in the world.

Kotetsu whistled. “Tricky guy.”

“I knew something was off,” Izumo added, nodding in approval. “Classic Kakashi.”

“I tried everything!” Naruto huffed, cheeks puffed slightly in frustration. “I rushed in without thinking—I just wanted to win so badly. But I was reckless… I ended up tied to a log while Sakura-chan and Sasuke got to eat lunch in front of me.” Her voice dropped to a pout. “And I was so hungry…”

Kotetsu's smile faltered, but before he could say anything, Naruto’s expression softened.

“But then… they fed me.” Her voice quieted, touched by the memory. “Even though Kakashi-sensei told them not to share. And just when I thought we were all gonna get kicked out, Kakashi-sensei appeared, looking super serious…”

Izumo and Kotetsu were on the edge of their seats now.

“And?” Kotetsu asked, eyes wide.

Naruto grinned, warmth glowing in her expression. “He told us we passed! He said we showed teamwork, and that’s what matters most.”

“Ohh, Kakashi-sensei, you softie…” Kotetsu sniffed dramatically, placing a hand over his heart.

“I was so happy, I hugged him!” Naruto laughed. “And guess what? He treated us to Ichiraku after that! It was the best ending ever!”

Kotetsu raised his bowl. “To Team 7!”

Izumo chuckled, raising his cup as well. “And to Naru-chan, the strongest Genin with the best heart.”

Naruto’s cheeks flushed a little, smiling sheepishly but clearly proud. As the three of them clinked bowls together and continued their meal, the house filled with laughter and warmth—proof that no matter what challenges came next, Naruto had a home, and people who would always be proud of her.

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“So… who fed you first?” Kotetsu asked, trying to sound casual—but the tension in his voice gave him away.

Naruto tapped her chin, glancing at the ceiling as if trying to recall. “Hmm… Oh! It was Sasuke-teme. Sakura-chan protested at first, but then she gave me some too.”

Kotetsu stood up so fast his chair nearly tipped. “I knew it!”

A loud thwack! followed as Izumo smacked the back of his head with practiced precision. “Sit down, drama queen.”

Kotetsu groaned, rubbing his head. “I’m telling you, it means something.”

“Yeah, it means teamwork, exactly what Naruto said.” Izumo sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Stop reading into everything like it’s a soap opera.”

Naruto, already stacking dishes at the sink, turned back with a bright smile. “It’s okay! I’ll wash the dishes tonight!”

“Ah, thanks, Naru-chan,” Izumo said gently. “But don’t make it a habit. You’re still the baby of this house.”

As Naruto turned on the water and started humming to herself, Kotetsu leaned toward Izumo, voice low.

“I’m telling you, man. That Uchiha kid has eyes on her. Feeding her first? That’s emotional vulnerability right there.”

Izumo shot him a deadpan stare. “That’s food, Kotetsu. Everyone gets emotional around food.”

Kotetsu pointed subtly toward Naruto. “That’s how it starts. First lunch, then walking her home, then—next thing we know—they’re dating and she’s calling him ‘Sasuke-kun’ with sparkles in her eyes!”

Izumo sighed, dragging a hand down his face. “You’re exhausting.”

“But what if he breaks her heart?” Kotetsu whispered more seriously now. “What if he hurts her? I don’t want to see her cry over some pretty-eyed, emotionally constipated kid.”

Izumo paused at that, glancing toward Naruto, who was giggling as she accidentally splashed herself with water. His eyes softened.

“…Then we make sure she never has to face it alone,” he said firmly.

Kotetsu nodded, quieter now. “Right. Always.”

They watched her in silence for a moment longer. Then Kotetsu spoke again, voice lighter.

“Still, I’m keeping an eye on that Uchiha. One wrong move and—poof—he’s on toilet-cleaning duty at the academy for the next year.”

Izumo chuckled. “You’re so overprotective.”

Kotetsu smirked. “Of course I am. She’s our Naruto-chan.”

“Oh, and don’t forget that Hyuuga kid,” Izumo added, sipping his tea with a sly smirk. “Just wait until the Chūnin Exams. You’ll be crying when her list of admirers doubles—especially once the foreign boys from other nations show up.”

“Huh?! She’s still a kid—our baby sister!” Kotetsu groaned dramatically, gripping his hair in despair.

Izumo gave him a flat look. “You say that now, but wait until one of them tries to flirt with her.”

Suddenly, a chill ran down Izumo’s spine as Kotetsu fell into an eerie silence… and then began laughing maniacally.

“Heh… Hehehe… HAHAHAHA! Not on my watch!” Kotetsu shouted, eyes wide with determination. “Foreign boys? Uchihas? Hyuugas?! I’ll crush them all! None shall pass!”

Izumo leaned back slowly, giving his best friend the same look one gives a wild animal. “You’ve finally lost it…”

At that very moment, Naruto returned from the kitchen, drying her hands with a towel. She paused in the doorway, blinking at the scene before her.

Kotetsu was standing on a chair, one foot up like he was about to give a victory speech. Izumo looked resigned, like he was reconsidering every life choice that led to this moment.

“…You two are being weird again,” Naruto muttered.

Kotetsu froze mid-pose, glancing at her like he’d been caught committing treason. Izumo cleared his throat and sat up quickly.

“Just, uh, discussing meal prep,” Izumo said smoothly. “We’re working on… international food awareness.”

Kotetsu nodded furiously. “Right! Research! In case you, uh, go on missions to other countries. Gotta protect you from—bad cooking!”

Naruto narrowed her eyes but said nothing, turning back toward her room.

As soon as the door shut behind her, Kotetsu whispered, “We need to step up surveillance.”

Izumo groaned into his hands. “I swear, if you start following her on missions…”

“Oh, I will,” Kotetsu said solemnly. “Big Brother Duty never ends.”

Before Kotetsu could continue spiraling, he burst out laughing maniacally again—hands raised in the air like some deranged mad scientist who had just broken out of a high-security prison.

“I’ll personally screen every boy who so much as looks at our Naru-chan!” he declared with wild eyes, standing on the chair like it was his villain lair. “No Uchiha! No Hyuuga! No foreign shinobi! She’ll remain our sweet little girl forever!”

Izumo’s eye twitched.

That was it. That was his breaking point.

He buried his face in his hands, groaning like a man who had lost the last shred of sanity he clung to. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel protective over Naruto—he did. Deeply. But unlike Kotetsu, he wasn't about to start preparing a list of approved future husbands or create a top-secret surveillance operation around her social life.

“You’ve completely lost it,” Izumo muttered, dragging his hands down his face. “I should’ve left you in the forest when I had the chance.”

Kotetsu turned dramatically, a gleam in his eyes. “But you didn’t! And now we shall build a fortress of protection around our little sister's heart! No boy shall pass!”

At that exact moment, Naruto peeked her head back into the room, eyebrows raised in suspicion. She stared blankly at Kotetsu, who was now striking some kind of defensive kung fu pose with chopsticks in hand like they were weapons.

“…Okay. What exactly is going on here?” she asked, deadpan.

Izumo stood up, walked past Kotetsu, and gently pushed Naruto back toward her room. “Ignore him. He’s having one of his moments again.”

Naruto tilted her head. “Again?”

“You don’t want to know.”

As soon as she disappeared back down the hall, Kotetsu called out, “Mark my words, Izumo! The day a boy tries to confess to her… I’ll be there! In the shadows!”

“I know,” Izumo muttered dryly. “That’s what terrifies me.”

Notes:

I am going crazy while writing this. I haven't left my room ever since then.

/)/)
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( づ♡

I will give Naruto a happy family as long as I live! (Laughing maniacally in my room, twinning with Kotetsu right now.)

Chapter 3: Marshmallow

Notes:

Kotetsu dynamic and Izumo last sign of sanity fading away.

Chapter Text

Kotetsu sprinted through the lively streets of Konoha, weaving past bustling market stalls and groups of shinobi chatting leisurely. It was a bright, peaceful day—until he heard something that nearly knocked the wind out of him. The moment still echoed in his head like a war drum: a casual conversation with that lazy Nara kid… and the jaw-dropping story he shared.

Kotetsu’s eyes were wide with urgency, determination burning in them as he scanned the crowd.

"There!" he hissed.

"Izumo!!!" he bellowed, finally spotting his best friend standing on the corner, casually chatting with Genma Shiranui. Without slowing down, Kotetsu charged like a missile and collided with Izumo, grabbing the front of his flak vest and shaking him violently.

"OY! YOU BASTARD! DO YOU KNOW WHAT I JUST HEARD?!" Kotetsu roared directly in his friend’s face.

Genma, caught completely off guard, blinked in confusion. The senbon in his mouth shifted slightly as he calmly moved it to the other side of his lips, his hand subtly ready in case this escalated into a full-blown brawl.

"What the hell’s the rush, Kotetsu?" Genma asked, arching a brow at the spectacle in front of him.

Izumo, annoyed and slightly embarrassed, kicked Kotetsu away with a heavy sigh. Kotetsu tumbled backwards with a grunt, landing unceremoniously in the dirt.

"Idiot," Izumo muttered, brushing off his flak jacket and straightening his headband. "You always make a scene when it involves Naruto."

Still on the ground, Kotetsu growled in frustration—then started to chuckle, brushing the dust off his pants.

"Don’t mind him, Genma-san," Izumo continued with a strained smile. "Kotetsu’s just going through one of his… ‘big brother meltdowns.’ They happen. Frequently."

Genma finally pieced it together. "Ah, right. Uzumaki Naruto. Your adopted sister," he said thoughtfully, scratching his cheek. "Didn’t expect her to have two overprotective idiots."

Kotetsu shot up from the ground like a man reborn. “She’s not just our sister—she’s our pride! And do you know what I just heard from that Nara brat?!”

Genma raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “No idea, but it sounds juicy.”

Kotetsu leaned in, eyes gleaming with outrage and fire. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.” He shouted as he grips his hair again.

Izumo groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Kami, not this again…”

"Ichiraku," Genma interrupted smoothly, placing a hand on each of their shoulders. "You’re buying the first round of ramen while you explain, Kotetsu. I gotta hear this."

"Deal!" Kotetsu barked, grabbing Izumo by the arm and practically dragging both him and Genma toward Ichiraku like a man on a mission.

Once they arrived at Ichiraku Ramen, Kotetsu wasted no time slapping down enough ryo to pay for three bowls. He even made sure to order Naruto’s favorite combination—extra pork slices, soft-boiled egg, and extra noodles.

It was only after he sat down, grinning with pride, that realization struck him.

“…Wait a second—Genma tricked me into paying,” Kotetsu muttered under his breath, eyes narrowing suspiciously at the older shinobi now sitting beside him with a lazy smirk.

But it was too late to take it back.

"So, mind telling us what this is all about? Calmly," Izumo reminded him with emphasis, shooting Kotetsu a warning glance. The last thing they needed was him throwing a full-blown tantrum in a crowded place.

Genma leaned back lazily, senbon still perched at the corner of his mouth, clearly enjoying the show. “Yeah, don’t keep us hanging.”

Kotetsu practically slammed his chopsticks into the bowl as he started. “So I bumped into that Nara kid—Shikamaru, right? One of Naruto’s close friends. Everything started off great, real chill. I was even beaming when he called me Naru-chan’s big brother.” His face softened briefly with pride, then turned dark again.

He quickly finished his first bowl in record time.

"Uncle! Another one, Naruto’s usual!" he called out.

"Coming right up!" Teuchi replied, already placing the new bowl in front of him with practiced ease.

Genma arched a brow. “So?”

Kotetsu inhaled deeply, then dropped the bomb. “I heard… that Naru-chan had her first kiss.”

Izumo choked on his noodles mid-slurp, eyes wide. “Her what?!”

“First. Kiss! And it wasn’t even recent—it was back in the academy!” Kotetsu hissed, pounding the counter dramatically. “Shikamaru said it was accidental—but no way! My big brother instincts are screaming. That Uchiha brat planned it!”

Genma burst out laughing, nearly dropping his chopsticks. “Wait, wait—Sasuke? The Uchiha? You mean to tell me the gloomy prodigy planted one on your precious baby sister back when they were twelve?”

“It wasn’t a plant per se,” Kotetsu said, dramatically mimicking air quotes. “It was an ‘accident.’ They both got shoved forward and—bam. Lips. Touched.”

Izumo turned pale. He stared at his bowl like it had personally betrayed him. “I... I need another round.”

Teuchi chuckled and refilled his order without question.

“See?! I told you that Uchiha kid had his eye on her,” Kotetsu grumbled, jabbing his chopsticks in the air. “You didn’t believe me, but now we have evidence. Physical. Evidence.”

Genma was practically crying with laughter. “You two are something else… She’s a genin now. It’s not like you can keep her locked up.”

“We should,” Kotetsu muttered.

“We’re not locking her up,” Izumo deadpanned, but the subtle twitch in his brow showed he wasn’t entirely against the idea.

Just then, the sound of a cheerful voice interrupted their downward spiral.

“Oi! Nii-san! Kotetsu-san! Izumo-san!!” Naruto appeared at the shop entrance, grinning wide and waving. “You guys eating without me?!”

Kotetsu immediately straightened, pretending everything was totally normal. “Naru-chan! Your usual’s already here!”

Izumo smiled warmly, though there was a nervous flicker in his eye. Genma, meanwhile, leaned toward Kotetsu with a sly smirk.

“Better watch it,” he whispered. “That Uchiha might not be the admirer she has.” Genma teased, seeing the famous Naruto Uzumaki.

Kotetsu stiffened.

Izumo sighed.

And Naruto? She happily plopped down beside Izumo, blissfully unaware of the war council forming in her name.

“Oh! Nii-san!” she perked up, as if just remembering something. She hopped off her stool and turned to wave excitedly down the street. “Kakashi-sensei! Sakura-chan! Sasuke-teme! Over here!”

A few moments later, the rest of Team 7 came into view. Kakashi, as usual, was nose-deep in his book, though he slid it closed with a lazy smirk as they approached.

“Ma… I didn’t expect to see you three here,” Kakashi said casually, eyeing Genma, Kotetsu, and Izumo from behind his mask as he took the seat near the wall.

Sakura followed and sat down beside her sensei, offering a friendly smile to Naruto. “Eh? You already ordered, Naruto? You really do love this place, huh?”

Naruto grinned, holding up her chopsticks like twin kunai. “Of course! It’s Ichiraku!”

Sakura chuckled softly, her earlier doubts about Naruto slowly disappearing the more time they spent together. Then her gaze shifted toward the three men on the opposite side of the shop—two of whom were giving off an oddly intense energy. She quickly figured out: those must be Naruto’s adopted brothers.

Sasuke approached last, arms crossed, but silently sat on the only open spot—right next to Naruto.

At that exact moment, Izumo’s big brother radar pinged.

Without a word, he stood and smoothly slid Naruto's bowl toward the spot beside him, switching places with her in one fluid movement so that he now sat between Naruto and Sasuke.

Kotetsu lit up like a proud parent watching his child’s school play, giving Izumo a discreet thumbs-up across the table as if to say: “Nice one, Izumo! Well played!”

Sasuke’s eyebrow twitched at the subtle shuffle, his seat now slightly farther from Naruto. He didn't comment—of course he wouldn't—but his glare briefly flicked to the older shinobi with an unmistakable tch of irritation.

Genma, who had been quietly sipping his broth, chuckled. “You two really gonna play defense the whole meal?”

“What defense?” Kotetsu replied innocently. “We’re just… keeping things balanced. Symmetrical seating, you know?”

Kakashi raised a brow but didn’t say anything. Instead, he re-opened his book and lazily turned a page. “This is going to be interesting.”

Naruto blinked between everyone, confused. “Why are you all acting weird? Did something happen?”

“Nothing at all!” Izumo and Kotetsu said in unison, too quickly.

Sakura looked between them and sweat-dropped.

Sasuke muttered under his breath.

And Naruto, oblivious as ever, just happily dug into her ramen, unaware that the fiercest battle she’d ever inspire had nothing to do with shinobi… and everything to do with big brother paranoia.

Team Seven had finally finished their meal and were heading off into the streets of Konoha.

"Ne, Naruto," Sakura said with a teasing smile as they walked. "I never knew your big brothers were that protective."

Naruto scratched her cheek awkwardly, letting out a nervous laugh. "Yeah... they've always been like that. You should've seen them when I cut my hair—Izumo looked like he was attending a funeral."

Their voices faded as they disappeared down the street.

Back inside Ichiraku, the air settled again. Genma leaned back slightly on his stool, watching the doorway for a moment longer before turning toward the two shinobi beside him.

He couldn't help but laugh—low and lazy. “You two were unbelievable,” he said, switching his senbon from one corner of his mouth to the other. “The way you shuffled Naruto away from that Uchiha kid like he was radioactive? Classic.”

Kotetsu crossed his arms proudly. “I was being tactical. That brat’s already kissed her once. I’m not letting him get within five feet of her again.”

Izumo groaned, rubbing his temples. “We were supposed to play it cool…”

“You traded seats with her mid-meal,” Genma pointed out dryly. “Cool flew out the window the moment she invited them over.”

Kotetsu opened his mouth to argue, but Genma cut him off.

“Anyway, break time’s over. You’re both assigned to the front gate shift. Let’s go.”

Kotetsu sighed dramatically, sliding off his stool. “Back to being gatekeepers of love and justice.”

Izumo slapped him on the back. “No. Just gatekeepers. Let’s go before you start spouting poetry.”

The three walked off down the street, leaving Ichiraku behind.

But Kotetsu muttered under his breath, “If Sasuke tries anything funny again, I will write a 12-page report to the Hokage.”

Izumo rolled his eyes. Genma just laughed.
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“I’m home!!” Naruto called out cheerfully as she burst through the door, her voice echoing through the house. She kicked off her sandals and rushed into the living room, where Kotetsu was lounging at the table, flipping through a magazine.

Kotetsu looked up with a grin. “Well, someone’s in a good mood. What happened? Get promoted to Hokage early?”

Naruto puffed up her cheeks. “No, but I received good news! I’ll tell you after dinner!”

From the kitchen, Izumo’s voice rang out in his usual no-nonsense tone, “Hey, you two—dinner’s almost ready. Wash your hands first.”

“Yes sir!” Naruto and Kotetsu replied in unison, both of them already heading toward the sink, giggling as they went.

As Naruto reached up to turn on the tap, she leaned in close and whispered to Kotetsu, “He acts like a mom sometimes.”

Kotetsu snickered, leaning down so she could whisper without Izumo overhearing. “Right? Total housewife energy.”

Naruto grinned mischievously. “It actually suits him.”

“Yeah, especially when he’s wearing that ‘I’m done with your nonsense’ expression.”

Behind them, a faint tick could be heard as Izumo’s temple twitched. A vein popped into visibility on his forehead as he stood behind the counter, stirring the pot a little too aggressively now.

“…I can hear you, you little gremlins,” he said flatly, glaring at them from the kitchen doorway.

Naruto and Kotetsu immediately straightened up, hands still under the running water as they grinned innocently.

“We didn’t say anything!” they chorused.

Izumo sighed, but a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “Dinner in five.”

As Naruto turned off the tap and dried her hands, she bounced on her toes. “Okay, okay! I can’t wait to tell you both what happened!”

Kotetsu ruffled her hair. “Better be a good story. We expect full details—with sound effects.”

Naruto beamed. “You got it!”

And just like that, the house was filled again with the sound of laughter and clattering dishes—an ordinary evening in the chaotic, loving home of three very different but inseparable shinobi.

“So?” Izumo asked, glancing up from his bowl. He’d caught Kotetsu mentioning that Naruto had some good news. He chewed slowly, eyes sharp, never taking his gaze off his sister.

Naruto’s face lit up as she set down her chopsticks. “Ah! I’ll be going on a mission outside the village tomorrow!”

“Mission...” Kotetsu muttered under his breath, his eyes narrowing as Izumo finished the sentence with a low, concerned “Outside…?”

Izumo froze for a moment, weighing the words carefully.

“That’s right!” Naruto nodded eagerly. “I’ve been begging the old man Hokage for it! He finally said yes!”

Kotetsu’s mind immediately jumped to worst-case scenarios — boys falling head over heels the moment they saw her, putting their “big brother” instincts on high alert.

Meanwhile, Izumo’s thoughts turned darker, calculating every possible danger she might face beyond the village walls. Ambushes, rogue ninjas, traps... the risks were real, and he didn’t want to lose her.

Naruto, oblivious to the silent tension between the two, kept smiling brightly, excited and hopeful.

Kotetsu finally cleared his throat, breaking the heavy silence. “Well... just remember, Naru-chan, no matter what, we’ve got your back.”

Izumo nodded in agreement, voice firm but gentle. “Be careful out there. Don’t take unnecessary risks.”

Naruto’s grin widened. “Don’t worry! I’ll come back safe and sound, just like always!”

But as she said it, both brothers exchanged a glance — protective, worried, and silently ready to jump to her defense if needed.

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Night fell gently over Konoha, and the household finally settled down to rest.

But not Kotetsu.

Tossing and turning under his blanket, his brow furrowed in distress. Beads of sweat began to form on his forehead as he whimpered in his sleep, trapped in a nightmare unlike any other.

In his dream, an old man—wrinkled, bald, and suspiciously dressed like a noble from the Land of Tea—was kneeling with a gaudy ring in hand, proposing to Naruto.

"No! No way!" Kotetsu muttered in his sleep, flailing slightly.

Dream-Naruto looked mildly confused but declined. Relief washed over Kotetsu—until it all spiraled into something far worse.

Out of the mist appeared Uchiha Sasuke. Cool. Brooding. Smirking.

Naruto blushed and accepted his confession. Accepted it.

Suddenly, in the dream, Sasuke had his arms confidently wrapped around Naruto’s waist like he owned the world—and her.

“I don’t need you guys anymore,” Dream-Naruto said coldly, eyes distant as she turned her back on Kotetsu.

Then Dream-Sasuke met Kotetsu’s horrified stare and gave him the most smug, insufferable smirk imaginable… before pushing him off a cliff made of broken ramen bowls and rejected mission reports.

“NARU-CHAN!!” Kotetsu shot up in bed, practically screaming.

The door slammed open a second later.

“BE QUIET!” Izumo barked as he chucked a pillow straight at Kotetsu’s face, nailing him perfectly.

Kotetsu fell backward with a grunt, mumbling through the pillow, “It was horrible… she said she didn’t need us anymore… and he… that smug bastard… touched her waist!”

Izumo stood at the doorway, deadpan and exhausted. “You need help.”

“Therapy won’t protect her from that Uchiha!”

“You need a straightjacket,” Izumo muttered, slamming the door shut again.

Kotetsu stared at the ceiling, wide-eyed. “I’ll never sleep again.”

From the other room, Izumo’s muffled voice called, “GOOD.”
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The next morning, before even the first hint of sunlight kissed the rooftops of the Hidden Leaf Village, Kotetsu and Izumo were already stationed at the village gates for their usual guard duty.

Kotetsu stood with a heavy yawn, slouching against the wooden post. The early hour did nothing to hide the dark bags under his eyes.

"You wouldn't believe it..." he muttered groggily.

Izumo glanced at him from behind his clipboard, already sensing nonsense. "What now?"

Kotetsu rubbed his eyes. "That Uchiha boy married Naru-chan in my dream last night. He looked so smug about it—and then he shoved me out of the way like I was just some fly. Worst part? You showed up and threw a pillow at me."

Izumo, not missing a beat, flipped a page and muttered, "That wasn’t a dream."

Kotetsu froze. His eyes widened in horror. “You mean Naruto-chan actually married THAT UCHIHA BOY?!”

Izumo's pen snapped mid-signature. He looked up with a dead stare.

"NO, IDIOT!" he growled, and punched Kotetsu in the shoulder hard enough to make the man stumble. “She’s still a kid, not even legal age! And I was talking about the second part—me throwing the pillow at you.”

Kotetsu blinked. “Oh…”

He held his shoulder dramatically. “Still hurts like it was real…”

Izumo rolled his eyes. “That’s because it was real. You screamed like a lunatic in the middle of the night. Woke up the neighbor's cat.”

Kotetsu groaned, rubbing his face. “You don’t get it, man. I’ve seen the future. I felt it. That Uchiha kid’s got evil plans. Evil smug plans.”

“And yet, somehow you’re the one acting like a cartoon villain,” Izumo muttered, flipping through another mission scroll.

Kotetsu leaned in suspiciously. “What if this mission Naruto’s going on today… is where it all starts?”

Izumo gave him a blank look. “If you say the phrase ‘the Uchiha mating ritual begins here,’ I’m putting in a transfer request.”

Kotetsu chuckled darkly. “Too late. I already marked the date. Operation: Future Brother-in-Law Interception has begun.”

“You’re unbelievable.”

“I'm a visionary.”

Izumo sighed. “You're a menace.”

Finally, their cheery, blonde little sister came into view—their ball of sunshine.

“Aniki!! Kotetsu! Izumo!” Naruto called out brightly, sprinting toward the small gate cabin where her brothers stood. Right behind her were her teammates—Kakashi, ever-lazy but alert, Sakura smiling politely, and Sasuke with his usual brooding silence.

“I’m setting off now!” Naruto beamed, throwing her arms around both brothers in a tight hug.

They returned the hug warmly—Izumo with a soft smile, Kotetsu nearly lifting her off the ground.

“Be careful out there,” Izumo said gently.

“Good luck—and kick those asses!” Kotetsu added with a big grin, giving her a thumbs-up.

Just then, Kakashi stepped closer, tucking away his little orange book.

“Kakashi.” Izumo turned serious, eyes narrowed just slightly. “Make sure you protect Naruto. And her teammates.”

Kakashi nodded, the expression behind his mask unreadable but respectful. “Of course. You can count on me.”

While Izumo spoke with Kakashi, Kotetsu’s eyes had already locked onto Sasuke like a hawk spotting a threat. The Uchiha completely ignored him, keeping his gaze ahead.

Brat, Kotetsu growled inwardly, scowling at the boy as if his glare alone could banish him from the team.

“Oy, Kotetsu! Don’t hold them up!” Izumo barked when he noticed Kotetsu wasn’t letting go of Naruto. “They’re ready to move.”

But Kotetsu only tightened his grip around Naruto with a dramatic whine. “Just one more minute! Who knows what those wild animals from the Land of Waves are like?!”

Izumo’s eye twitched. He stormed over, struck Kotetsu square in the back of the neck, and started dragging him away by the collar like an unruly cat.

“Have a safe trip!” Izumo called to the group as he hauled Kotetsu off. “Ignore this idiot.”

Naruto giggled, waving back. “I’ll be fine! Love you both!”

Kotetsu, still in a headlock, shouted over his shoulder, “IF THAT UCHIHA EVEN BREATHES TOO CLOSE, I SWEAR—!”

“SHUT UP!” Izumo hissed, elbowing him again as the gate closed behind Team 7.

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Now that Naruto was gone, peace should’ve returned to their shift. But for Izumo, that peace meant dealing with this idiot for the rest of the day.

With a long, exhausted sigh, Izumo resumed his post beside Kotetsu, who had been dramatically sulking all morning. They remained at the village gate until their replacements arrived, then retreated to their usual lunch spot—a quiet wooden bridge stretching over a shallow lake.

Kotetsu pouted as he munched on his lunch, feet dangling above the water. “I miss Naru-chan already,” he whined between bites. “Our cute little sister…”

“Gosh... can’t you survive even one day without her?” Izumo muttered from behind, chewing slowly. He leaned back, staring up at the sky.

“Ha? What do you mean? Of course I can—”

He was cut off by an all-too-familiar, sneering voice.

“Well, well, if it isn’t the two idiots who decided to adopt a jinchūriki.”

Both Kotetsu and Izumo stiffened. They turned around slowly, eyes narrowing as they locked onto a tall shinobi with a smug grin on his face.

Doi Hikaru.

A former classmate. An arrogant, mean-spirited ninja who had a long history of rubbing people the wrong way. He stood a few feet away, flanked by two lackeys who chuckled like it was the funniest joke they’d heard all day.

Kotetsu’s jaw clenched. Izumo’s brow twitched.

“What?” Kotetsu said coldly, rising to his feet.

“You didn’t hear me?” Hikaru grinned, his eyes gleaming with malice. “I said—what’s it like raising a monster?”

The air grew tense.

Kotetsu stepped forward, fists already clenched, but Izumo quickly held him back with an arm across his chest.

“Calm down, idiot,” Izumo muttered. “He’s not worth it. Don’t give him the satisfaction.”

But Hikaru wasn’t done.

“She’s turning out pretty though,” he said with a nasty smirk, venom dripping from every word. “Guess all that ‘big brother’ care is really paying off, huh? Makes you wonder how long until people start questioning your motives. You’re always so close to her…”

That was the last straw.

Izumo stepped forward, his voice low, controlled—dangerous. “Say that again.”

Hikaru’s smirk wavered, but he stood his ground. “What? I’m just saying what others are probably thinking.”

Izumo’s hand slid to his kunai pouch, slow and deliberate. “One more word out of your mouth, and I swear to the Hokage himself, you’ll be eating through a straw for the next six months.”

The air between them crackled with tension.

Kotetsu moved beside Izumo, eyes dark with fury. “You don’t get to talk about her. Not her name. Not her face. Not anything. She’s our sister. And if I ever hear that filth again—”

He didn’t finish. He didn’t need to.

One of Hikaru’s flunkies tugged at his sleeve nervously. “Hikaru, let’s go. This isn’t worth it.”

For a moment, it seemed like Hikaru would push it further—but in the end, he scoffed and turned away. “Touchy, touchy. Guess some monsters have watchdogs after all.”

As they disappeared into the crowd, Izumo exhaled slowly, still tense.

Kotetsu growled. “I should’ve knocked his teeth out.”

Izumo shook his head. “He’s not worth a report on our records.”

“But one day…”

“One day,” Izumo agreed.

They sat back down on the bridge, the tension fading, but the fire inside them still burning.

“They would finally accept her” Izumo murmured, watching the water shimmer.

Kotetsu looked out into the distance. “She's more than a monster to us.. She's our sister”

“No,” Izumo said quietly. “She’s family.”

Their day was never complete without Doi Hikaru getting on their nerves.

Chapter 4: Ice

Chapter Text

It had been several days since Naruto left the village for her first official mission. Ever since then, Kotetsu had been pouting nonstop, much to Izumo's irritation. The older shinobi was already on the verge of slapping his best friend—for Kami’s sake, how long could a grown man sulk?

"When is Naru-chan coming back?!" Kotetsu whined loudly for the fifth time that morning, clearly missing their dear little sister.

"Stop whining, you idiot. You're a grown-ass man," Izumo snapped, shooting him a glare. Of course, he missed Naruto too—but unlike Kotetsu, he had some self-control.

"I’m just not used to her not being by our side for this long!" Kotetsu argued, throwing his arms up dramatically.

Izumo let out a tired sigh. Arguing with Kotetsu was a waste of time especially when he got like this.

Being stationed at the Hidden Leaf Village’s main gate was already a headache on its own, but doing it while babysitting a full-grown drama king like Kotetsu made it ten times worse.

Still, despite the annoyance, Izumo understood. After all, they didn’t just see Naruto as a fellow shinobi—she was their adopted little sister. They had watched her grow up, had been there during her tough days at the Academy, and now she was out on her own, proving herself to the world.

It was something to be proud of.

But damn, they really missed her.

Izumo sighed for the ninth time that day, resting his chin in his palm as his eyes trailed down the road that stretched from the Hidden Leaf Village gate to the horizon beyond. Shinobi came and went, heading out for their missions or returning from them, each one sparing a nod or greeting to the two ever-watchful gatekeepers—Kotetsu and Izumo.

Kotetsu stood nearby, clipboard in hand, scribbling down names and mission assignments. He was in charge of recording the number of shinobi leaving for duty—Genin, Chuunin, Jounin, and even the occasional masked ANBU.

It was all part of their daily routine. Tedious, yes, but essential. Their job wasn’t just to guard the gate—it was to be the first line of defense. No one suspicious got in or out on their watch. They had protocols. Procedures. Even if it all felt repetitive, it was still important.

Still, even with work to do, there was something someone missing.

Izumo’s eyes flicked toward the road again, the faintest frown tugging at his lips.

"She’s late," he muttered, not really directing the words to anyone in particular.

Kotetsu looked up from his clipboard, his brow furrowing. "Naruto?"

Izumo gave a small nod.

Kotetsu sighed this time, mirroring his friend’s earlier gesture. “She was supposed to be back today, right? Maybe she got caught up with something on the mission.”

"Maybe..." Izumo said, though the concern in his voice betrayed him.

The two men fell into silence, the kind that only came when you missed someone deeply but didn’t want to say it out loud again.

Their little sister loud, bright, reckless Naruto had been gone for too long.

Then, a familiar voice reached their ears—bright and energetic, cutting through the hum of daily routine like sunlight after rain.

Both Izumo and Kotetsu instinctively looked up, eyes locking on the group approaching from the village road.

It was Naruto.

She was walking alongside her team: Kakashi leading the way with his usual lazy posture, Sakura chatting animatedly beside her, and the ever-brooding Sasuke trailing at the back, his hands stuffed in his pockets and his gaze distant.

Kotetsu and Izumo both grumbled quietly at the sight of the Uchiha, but their irritation vanished the moment Naruto broke from the group and ran toward them.

“Ni-chan! I’m back—and I totally beat those guys up!” she beamed, stopping right in front of them, her bright blue eyes shining with pride.

The two men froze, clutching their chests dramatically as if they'd been shot in the heart.

“That smile… Kami, I wasn’t ready,” Izumo mumbled, pretending to stagger.

Kotetsu, overcome with emotion, immediately threw open the door to their small guard post and pulled Naruto into a tight hug. She was definitely taller now—just a little—but enough for them to notice. She was growing up.

“You idiot, don’t go scaring us like that again!” Kotetsu muttered, voice muffled against her shoulder.

“I wasn’t scared,” Izumo added quickly, though his watery eyes said otherwise.

Naruto laughed, squeezing them both back. “You guys are so dramatic.”

"Hurry up, Naruto! We need to report to the Hokage first!" Sakura called out, already locking arms with the energetic blonde and dragging her away before she could protest.

“See you later, Ni-chan!” Naruto called back over her shoulder, waving enthusiastically at Kotetsu and Izumo as she was whisked off by her teammate.

Kotetsu chuckled, waving back. “Take your time telling the Hokage how awesome you are!”

Izumo smirked. “As if she’ll leave out any details.”

As the rest of the team followed, Kakashi paused for a moment, snapping his little orange book shut and sliding it into his pouch. He gave the two gatekeepers a calm, respectful nod.

“Don’t worry,” Kakashi said, his voice casual but sincere. “Your sister did just fine on the mission.”

Kotetsu and Izumo straightened a bit, their attention sharpening.

“We ran into some trouble along the way bandits, harsh terrain, and more than one unexpected challenge but Naruto handled herself better than most. Everyone praised her in the end,” Kakashi continued, his single visible eye curving into a smile beneath his mask.

He paused, then added, almost offhandedly, “They even named the bridge after her. ‘The Great Naruto Bridge.’ Pretty impressive, huh?”

For a second, both Kotetsu and Izumo just stood there, stunned.

“…Wait, what?” Kotetsu blinked.

Izumo’s mouth hung open. “A whole bridge? Named after her?”

“Yup,” Kakashi replied coolly, turning to follow his team. “Looks like your little sister’s already making a name for herself—literally.”

As the silver-haired jonin disappeared down the street, Kotetsu and Izumo looked at each other, wide-eyed.

Then Kotetsu laughed, slapping Izumo on the back. “Our baby sister’s a legend now!”

Izumo smiled softly, pride swelling in his chest. “Damn right she is.”

They returned to their posts, but now the dull routine felt a little brighter, knowing Naruto wasn’t just growing—she was shining.

The moment their shift ended and they were finally off-duty, Kotetsu and Izumo didn’t waste a single second. Like a pair of overexcited kids, they bolted from the village gates and sprinted down the streets of Konoha, weaving past pedestrians and market stalls with one goal in mind getting home before their little sister.

They didn’t want Naruto to wait even a minute.

Izumo was already mentally flipping through recipes, debating whether to make her favorite ramen, grilled fish, or something more elaborate to celebrate her return. Maybe all three, he thought, if he could cook fast enough.

Beside him, Kotetsu was grinning ear to ear, his legs moving on pure adrenaline. He couldn’t wait to hear all about the mission every obstacle, every battle, every dramatic twist. Most of all, he wanted to hear it from Naruto herself, with her wild hand gestures, sparkly eyes, and way-too-loud storytelling that always made their home feel more alive.

“She better not leave out the part about the bridge!” Kotetsu said breathlessly between strides.

“She better not come home to a messy house,” Izumo shot back. “You didn’t do laundry before we left, did you?”

Kotetsu winced. “Oops.”

“You’re the worst big brother ever.”

“And yet, I’m still her favorite,” Kotetsu said with a smug grin.

Izumo rolled his eyes, but he couldn't stop the fond smile forming on his face.

They turned a corner, their modest little house finally coming into view. Warm lights spilled from the windows, and smoke curled lazily from the chimney.

Their hearts lifted.

Home was no longer just a place it was a feeling.

And tonight, with Naruto back under the same roof, it would feel complete again.

When Naruto finally came home after her debriefing at the Hokage Tower, she was greeted by the warm scent of home-cooked food and the sight of a full feast spread across the dining table. Her eyes widened in delight.

Izumo and Kotetsu were already seated, both of them trying and failing to look casual as they waited for her. The excitement in the room was almost tangible.

Naruto’s tired expression melted away instantly, replaced with a radiant smile. All the exhaustion from the mission disappeared in an instant.

She had missed this—missed them. No matter how far she went, she'd never grow tired of coming home if this was the kind of welcome waiting for her.

“Wash your hands first, Naru-chan,” Izumo said with a familiar gentle smile, the kind that made her feel safe and loved, even if his expression always looked a little sleepy.

“Hurry up, sis! I’m dying to hear about your first mission outside the village!” Kotetsu added, practically bouncing in his seat with excitement.

“Okay!! Oh—and I brought gifts for both of you from the Land of Waves!” Naruto chirped, setting her bag down on the couch with a soft thud before hurrying over to the sink.

Kotetsu gasped dramatically, clutching his chest as if struck by lightning. “Naru-chan’s first ever gifts for us—I’m not emotionally prepared!” he wailed, a single tear slipping down his cheek.

“She spent her first mission pay on us,” Izumo said softly, watching her fondly as she scrubbed her hands. His heart clenched with pride. “She’s really growing up.”

Naruto returned to the table moments later, hands clean, energy high.

“You guys better love them,” she said with a cheeky grin, rummaging through her bag. “They’re not much, but I picked them out myself!”

“You could’ve brought us a rock and we’d frame it,” Kotetsu said with a sniff, trying not to cry again.

“Oi, don’t make her regret it,” Izumo teased, shaking his head.

As Naruto pulled out the simple but thoughtful souvenirs—handmade keychains carved from driftwood, and small woven bracelets—the house filled with laughter, teasing, and warmth.

Dinner that night wasn’t just a meal.

It was a celebration of her return, of their bond, and of how far they’d all come.

“And then I beat him up! You know, I was really shocked when I found out Haku was a boy! He was so pretty I seriously thought he was a girl!” Naruto exclaimed, waving her chopsticks around as she spoke, her voice full of energy and excitement.

She was in the middle of recounting her first mission outside the village, animatedly describing every moment that stood out. Of course, she carefully left out the part where she had tapped into the Kyuubi’s power—when she thought Sasuke was going to die. There was no way she’d tell her brothers that. They’d worry too much, and she didn’t want that.

The dining table was alive with laughter and chatter, warmth wrapping around the little home like a comforting blanket. Naruto sat cross-legged on her chair, the center of attention as she told her story with wide eyes and grand hand gestures.

Kotetsu gasped and clapped at all the right parts, practically worshiping every word she said.

“No way! You took down a masked ninja and helped defeat Zabuza?! Our little sister’s unstoppable!” he cheered, eyes sparkling with pride.

Izumo, ever the quieter of the two, leaned back slightly in his seat with a small smirk on his face. “I knew you’d be strong,” he said simply. “You always push through.”

They believed every word she told them not just because they trusted her, but because they knew her. They had trained with her, scolded her, encouraged her. Many of the jutsu she used, they had taught her themselves, back when she was barely tall enough to hold a kunai properly. The rest, she had picked up through sheer determination or learned from Kakashi during Team 7's training.

“Maybe next time you two should go on a mission with me,” Naruto teased, grinning brightly as she grabbed another rice ball.

“Nah, we’d just slow you down,” Kotetsu chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. “Can’t keep up with a legend now.”

“A bridge named after her, and now she’s making jokes,” Izumo said dryly, though his tone was laced with affection.

Naruto giggled, cheeks slightly flushed from the praise.

For the first time in a while, she felt truly at peace.

Home, good food, and her brothers—nothing else could compare.

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Izumo woke in the middle of the night, his throat dry and head heavy with sleep. He groaned softly as he sat up, rubbing his eyes. The sun hadn’t risen yet, and the world outside his window was still cloaked in silence and cold shadows.

With a quiet sigh, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up, stretching his back with a tired grunt. Going back to sleep didn’t feel worth it—not with the chill and dryness in his throat—so he made his way toward the kitchen.

The wooden floor creaked beneath his feet with each slow, sleepy step. As he passed the hallway, he paused.

Something caught his eye in the living room.

Frowning, Izumo turned his head toward the source. Through the faint light filtering in from the window, he saw a vague shape on the floor. His body tensed instinctively as he reached toward the light switch on the wall, flipping it on with a soft click.

Relief immediately washed over him.

It wasn’t an intruder—it was Naruto.

She was fast asleep on the floor, slumped over the coffee table with her arms folded like a makeshift pillow. Her breathing was even, lips slightly parted, a stubborn little line etched into her brows even in sleep.

Izumo stepped closer and spotted several scrolls scattered around her. A few ink smudges dotted the table, and a half-used brush sat in an open inkwell. It didn’t take much to guess what had happened.

“She was practicing again…” he murmured to himself.

Her sealing work was precise, detailed, and uncommonly creative for her age. If there was one skill Naruto had taken to like second nature, it was fūinjutsu. She was an Uzumaki through and through—their clan’s natural talent for seals ran deep in her blood.

Izumo knelt down, carefully picking up the scrolls one by one and arranging them in a neat pile, making sure not to disturb any of her work. He could already hear her groaning about back pain in the morning—loudly and dramatically, as usual.

“You’re going to ruin your spine before you even make it to Chuunin,” he muttered affectionately.

With practiced gentleness, he slipped one arm under her legs and the other around her back, lifting her off the floor. She shifted slightly in his arms but didn’t wake, resting her head against his shoulder as if she instinctively knew it was safe.

He carried her down the hallway and quietly pushed open her bedroom door. The room was still dark, untouched since earlier that evening. He laid her down on the bed carefully, pulling the blanket over her small frame.

For a moment, Izumo just stood there, watching her sleep peacefully.

“You really don’t know how amazing you are, do you?” he whispered softly.

The sun still hadn’t risen. There was time yet—for her to sleep a little longer, and for him to sit quietly and remember just how proud he was of the girl who had become their light.

Izumo stood quietly at the edge of Naruto’s bed, watching her sleeping form bathed in the soft glow of the hallway light. Her breathing was steady, her expression relaxed peaceful in a way that was rare for someone who carried so much weight on such small shoulders.

He could still see traces of the little girl he had met years ago small, weak, skinny, and timid. She had hidden her pain behind loud words and bigger dreams, but he had seen through it. That was the very moment he and Kotetsu had made an unspoken vow: to protect her, no matter what.

A soft sigh escaped him as the memories surfaced. He stepped closer, crouching down beside the bed and gently reached out, brushing aside a few loose strands of golden hair from her face.

“You’re still small… still reckless… but not so weak anymore,” he whispered, his voice barely audible. “But while we still can… we’ll protect you.”

Even if she couldn’t hear him now, he needed to say it—for himself as much as for her.

Izumo knew the truth, though.

Naruto was growing stronger with each passing day. Her chakra was vast far beyond what any Genin should possess—and even though he could only faintly sense it, it was enough to know that she held something powerful within her. Something more than just talent.

He chuckled quietly to himself. “Honestly… you could probably beat me and Kotetsu already if you went all out.”

He sat back on his heels, letting his gaze linger on her peaceful face.

He and Kotetsu—mere gatekeepers, average Chūnin at best—weren’t anything special in the grand scheme of the shinobi world. They weren’t prodigies, heroes, or legends. Just two tired men trying to do their jobs.

But to Naruto, they were family.

And that was more than enough for Izumo.

No matter how strong she got, no matter how far her dreams took her, they’d always be there behind her—quietly supporting, always watching, and ready to catch her if she ever fell.

He stood slowly, pulling the blanket a little higher over her shoulders before turning toward the door.

“Goodnight, Naru-chan,” he whispered one last time, then closed the door with a soft click behind him.