Archive of Our Own ^beta

Maddie doesn’t know if her therapist would be proud or disappointed in her right now. See, she’s working through things right now. She is! She really, really is trying.

Because, well, sex has never been easy for her—so wrapped up in Doug and dark, awful, horrible shame. It was never that important to her, not even when things were okay with Doug.

When she met Howie, though, it was as if years of untapped sexual potential hit her in the face and her libido was back like crazy. However, the act of it… the intimacy, the unbridled vulnerability that came with sex was overwhelming and a difficult leap to get through. She worked through it, and Chimney, god, he’s wonderful and attentive. He’s never once made her feel weird or broken. He’d kiss her neck and suck at the soft skin of her tits so carefully, so sweetly, until she was rasping and dripping and wanting.

But. But still—there were moments, she still had them—where he was inside her and she was so distinctly aware that he’s a man, that he’s strong and capable in ways she’s seen Doug manipulate her with. During those moments, Maddie took deep breaths and focused on knowing she’s never been more safe than she is with Chimney.

Then after she got back from Boston—the second time—she’s been back to weekly therapy here in L.A and somehow she’s found herself confident enough to be making sexual decisions purely for herself. Apart from Doug, or even Chimney. Just for herself.

Like… right now. In Taylor Kelly’s bed. Maybe a profound and awful mistake that she’ll deal with later, but now? At this exact moment? It’s everything. She’s splayed out, her head propped up on the most comfortable pillow that’s possibly ever existed and her legs spread to accommodate Taylor between them. 

Taylor is softer than she would have imagined. Not just her skin, but the way she touches Maddie, too. Her nails are short, manicured, maintained perfectly, and they trace soft lines on the insides of her thighs. The sensation makes Maddie erupt in goosebumps. She can feel her hot breath fanning against the wet, slicked up skin of her folds.

“So pretty,” Taylor says. She’s talkative, too. But Maddie could have already guessed that. She uses both pointer fingers to spread her apart and just… touches. Gentle little caresses that spread zings of pleasure all the way to Maddie’s core. “So wet, too. Prettiest pussy I’ve ever touched. Can I taste you?”

“What? Yeah—yeah,” she breathes. “Jesus, you’re nicer than I would have thought.”

Taylor laughs dryly while she scooches down the bed. Her mouth is so close to where Maddie wants her the most, so she hitches her hips up in a motion to say yes, please eat me out please, please.

“Why wouldn’t I be nice to you?”

“‘Cause you’re kind of a bitch.”

“And you’re meaner than I would have thought.” Taylor’s knuckle drags across her folds and brushes lightly against Maddie’s throbbing clit. She presses a little harder when Maddie groans softly. “Mmh, so responsive. I’m one lucky girl.”

The flat of Taylor’s tongue licks from her dripping pussy up to her clit. Immediately, Maddie bows her back off the sheets. It’s barely a taste of what’s to come, she’s sure of that, but, god, it feels revelatory to have Taylor’s long hair brushing her thighs and soft hands pawing at her belly. Taylor continues her agonizing soft kitten licks, but Maddie doesn’t beg or plead for more. It’s perfect like this—Taylor getting her keyed up and wanting. With more fervor, Taylor focuses on her clit and starts a steady pace of licking and sucking on the sensitive flesh. 

“You’re good at that,” she says breathlessly. 

Taylor hums around her and apparently takes the praise as incentive to get Maddie closer to the edge faster than she thought was humanly possible. She angles her hands up a little further until she’s grabbing Maddie’s tits between her hands and pinching her nipples. With a quick move that makes Maddie want to whine, Taylor pulls up for air. She licks her lips and moans—a little too performative for Maddie’s taste—now sitting in Maddie’s lap and playing with her nipples.

“God, these tits are absurd,” she half-laughs. “So fucking hot.” Then, she grinds herself down onto Maddie’s thigh.

The warmth and wetness radiating off of Taylor is driving Maddie absolutely mad. She’s—so in the moment. She’s in her body, completely aware of every tinge of pleasure she’s experiencing and wants Taylor to feel it too. 

“Taking what you want?” Maddie jokes, but doesn’t move to stop Taylor from grinding against her. Plus, Taylor’s hands are still groping her and making Maddie see stars when she pinches just a little too hard. 

“You like this,” Taylor says, more like an observance rather than a quip. Maddie nods quickly and cants her hips up, her thigh moving right where Taylor wants. “Feels good, Maddie. Fuck. Don’t even need you to touch me, just looking at you is good enough. Fuck, uhn—”

There’s sweat dripping down Maddie’s face and her hip is starting to cramp from the way she’s bent her body to get Taylor off but she finds that she doesn’t care. Taylor’s riding her thigh like she’d ride a cock, her hands pressed down to Maddie’s chest. Yet, still somehow diligently and expertly paying attention to her nipples like it’s her only job in the world. 

Taylor’s breath is hitching up, her words getting a little more incoherent, it’s clear that she’s about to come. But. Maddie wants so badly that she’s going to explode. She needs Taylor’s mouth or hands back on her clit yesterday—and hey, the reason why Maddie’s here in the first place is to work on speaking her needs properly.

So, she says, “touch me, Taylor. Touch my clit. You can come after.”

Taylor’s thrusts stutter as her eyes snap open. “A Buckley telling me what to do in bed is new.” 

Fighting back a groan, Maddie replies, “do not bring that up. Use that mouth somewhere else. Preferably quickly.”

The swivel of Taylor’s hips finally stops, a brand new determination gleaming in her eyes. She peels herself away from Maddie’s legs, and Maddie can’t help but feel another rush of arousal flooding her gut when she sees the remnants of Taylor’s slick on both of their thighs. Maddie feels downright filthy. She’s beginning to truly like this feeling.

Maddie finds Taylor incomprehensibly beautiful in the moment, something she’s never really thought about before now. It must be different, seeing her this way—with her red hair somehow still looking perfectly styled falling like ribbons in front of her, her pink-bitten lips, her tits perky and soft—all like she’s stepped out of some renaissance painter's wet dream. 

Still flat on her back and with Taylor on her stomach again, she relaxes and tenses at the same time as Taylor’s tongue finds her clit. Maddie hasn’t felt this keyed up in a long time. Probably not since she was a pre-teen and the slightest pressure could make her come. There were years where sex and pleasure didn’t cross her mind—or if it did, it was always out of fear or obligation. It got better with Howie, of course, because everything got better with him. But Maddie’s problem, what’s always been her problem is she gets too into her head. Working herself up and stressing out over an ideal of what sex should be, and not just accepting it for whatever it is in the moment.

Now, Maddie lets herself relax into the moment. Into this moment. And the thing about this particular moment, is that it's not about Taylor, not really. Because maybe it’s about women in general. How much Maddie loves women, how she never really let herself have the thought of being with one. There was always something—a someone—who stole her girlhood exploration, who she wasted her wild youth and early adulthood on. She can’t get those years back, no matter how badly she wants them. There’s a mark on her shoulder and one on her thigh that will never go away, physical reminders of what he’d done to her. 

But Maddie is alive and breathing. Years continue on. Scars fade or get covered or get kissed. And Maddie may not be a rowdy college student making questionable but life-defining choices, but she’s still a person. She survived, she survives. 

Now, it can be about Maddie. About what she wants. And what she really wants right now—more than world peace, free healthcare and a million fucking dollars—is for Taylor Kelly to make her come so hard she sees stars.

Maddie’s thighs are clenching around Taylor’s face, a hand grasped in her pretty hair and fucking into the warmth of her tongue. Taylor takes it in stride, humming and moaning like she’s getting off from just this. It’s fucking intoxicating hearing the obscene slick of Taylor licking and sucking at her clit. She’s just a moment away from the best orgasm she’s had in her entire life when Taylor pulls away from her. 

“Oh, so you are a bitch in bed,” Maddie groans.

“Fuck off,” Taylor chides back. She licks her lips again, and Maddie thinks that maybe she’s really not trying to play up a performance and just wants to keep tasting Maddie. “Just askin’ you if you want some fingers in you, too? Feels good to fuck and clench onto something when you come.”

Something like shame or fear toils in Maddie’s gut, but she’s not about to unpack all of that with Taylor right now, so she just shakes her head softly. “No, uh—no penetration, please. Just keep going.”

She goes right back to it and Maddie has a horrifying thought of patting her head and calling her a good girl—or something equally as embarrassing. She chews on her lip instead as Taylor returns back with the same passion. Maddie fondles her own tits, pinching and twisting her nipples as she gets worked closer to orgasm.

Her legs are shaking again, her stomach taut in anticipation as the pressure builds insurmountably. It hits her like a goddamn meteorite—explosive, world ending pleasure rips through her as Taylor keeps licking her through it. She’s probably babbling nonsense, some mix of fuck and Taylor thrown in there. 

Taylor’s still sucking at her as the orgasm ebbs and the overstimulation begins. She doesn’t pull away, doesn’t push at Taylor’s head. Because if Taylor wants to keep eating her out, Maddie’s certain she's not wanting to deny her that right now. After the pain of the stimulation subsides, the fire lit in her belly is still roaring. She’s right back on that edge Taylor had her at six minutes ago. 

To herself, Maddie suddenly thinks that Taylor should get some sort of award for this. A brass statue made of a tongue, or maybe a flower representing a vulva—she can’t really pinpoint the specifics because her brain is fried as her second orgasm hits her. 

For a moment, her vision blacks out and her ears ring with the intensity of it. This time, she attempts to clamp her thighs together, essentially caging in Taylor’s face between her legs. Maddie can hear her make a noise, maybe laughter or some bubbling up quip she’s trying to voice. She eases up and lets Taylor extricate herself, flopping right on top of her. Their skin that's thick with sweat and slick practically sticks together. Maddie is breathless, her head still spinning and pussy throbbing.

“Wow. You should,” she swallows harshly, then continues, “get an award for that.”

Taylor laughs into her neck, then licks a stripe up to her ear. “You’re beautiful, Maddie. Like, seriously, damn.”

She can’t help the heat that her cheeks flush with. The woman made her come twice in a row, maybe—no, definitely—harder than she has in her life and a simple compliment is making her blush. She shakes the embarrassment away, and strokes Taylor's hair.

“Come on. You wanted to come so bad before. What do you want me to do?”

Sure, in Maddie’s head, this whole thing was about her finding her pleasure and her voice or whatever—but she wants Taylor to feel good too.

“You stay just like you are,” she says. Slowly, she heaves herself back up so she’s on her haunches, slotted between Maddie’s legs. 

She seems to really like this position. Maddie knows she has great tits, but, wow, Taylor seems to be really into this. With one hand grazing and teasing at her tits and the other between her legs, Taylor gets herself off quick and dirty. Like she didn’t even need that much stimulation, just getting Maddie off and looking at her was enough.

For once in Maddie’s life, there’s not really an endgame or a goal to achieve in this relationship. She just had mind blowing sex with a hot person she’s pretty much hoping to never see again. When they tumbled into Taylor’s apartment and she was hastily taking off her clothes, she thought this may be the worst mistake of her life. Maddie’s made a lot of mistakes in her life, and she really can’t bring herself to care if this was one at all.