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Language:
English
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Published:
2025-06-19
Completed:
2025-06-20
Words:
505
Chapters:
2/2
Comments:
4
Kudos:
6
Hits:
155

Charon's stupid fucking hyperfixstion

Summary:

Mephistopheles' driver learns about homestuck and she makes it everybody's problem

Notes:

Was reading the works of Ken Liu and went "woah i write like this how did bro get awards"

Chapter 1

Chapter Text

Despite it not being their regular meeting time, the bus' war room was bustling with energy.

"What is the meaning of this? Are we under attack? What urgent matter needs us here now?" Outis barked.

"Oi quiet down I'm trying to sleep!" Heathcliff responded before slumping back down on the table.

Don Quixote sat across from him and was scarfing an entire bowl of bear shaped fruit jellies(which was intended for everyone to share but blood fiends are greedy fucks)

Gregor tries to light a cigarette and Faust reacts her arm around and slaps it out of his face.

The sinners wait for 12 minutes until Dante comes in.

<IM SO SORRY I HAD YOU GUYS WAITING SO LONG>

They ticked panickingly. Dante cried inside while they endured the barrage of insults from the sinners.

"Why did you wake us up in the middle of the night for this?"

"Don ate all the candy!"

Dante tried to explain the outrage when...

"Coming through. Vroom vroom people will stay and watch Charon explain your troll bloods"

"Our huh???" Sinclair did not want to appreciate being compared to a TROLL. Like those guys that live under bridges and shit

"Since bird boy is first to react I do him first. You are bronze blood page of Light."

She points at Ryoshu. "Maid of heart and Jade blood."

"A.D.F.W"

"Sword girlie lets emotions take over her actions so it fits"

Ryoshu says "S.Y.B.A.U" and poses herself like the guy in the image saying sybau.

Then the young driver started gesturing toward the rest and assigns them all classes and aspects.

Everyone, including Dante sighed.

Chapter 2

Summary:

Okay so here are the actual classpects and sways of the sinners but the blood colours I'm not sure about

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Yi Sang: mage of breath and Prospit (his story has an overarching sense of freedom and letting go of regrets)

Faust: seer of life and Derse (I just wanted to give her something adequately ethereal and magical)

Don Quixote: heir of blood and Derse (this is totally based on her being Sancho)

Ryoshu: Maid of heart and Prospit (I'm debating which moon sway she has since either could fit)

Meursault: rogue of mind and Derse (I think the way he just randomly disperses logic and reason is very roguelike)

Hong Lu: bard of time and Prospit (I heard Tian Tian and thought "this is Aradia coded" and it made me think about Hong Lu a little)

Heathcliff: prince of space and Derse (no notes)

Ishmael: witch of hope and prospit(LITERALLY LOOK AT HER LISTEN TO COMPASS PLAY CANTO 5)

Rodion: sylph of rage and Derse (I've stopped providing useful notes a long time ago it just fits is all.)

Sinclair: page of light and Prospit (his whole "two worlds schtick in Demian kinda feels like he has the potential to to become a great source of Light and stuff idk I'm not a people expert)

Outis: knight of void and Prospit (no notes)

Gregor: thief of doom and Derse (hehe get it because Gregor must suffer everyone's bullshit so he's stealing the suffering for himself)

 

Notes:

Please provide feedback these are just headcanons)