Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It’s my 2nd year at Elfhame Community College and I’m studying Medieval history. I’ve been getting moderately good grades mostly B and A. I’ve been saving up for 5 years to get a shitty studio apartment near campus. It’s nothing special it has everything I need, a small kitchen, bed, desk, closet, dining area, and a bathroom.

It’s worth it to get away from my foster father Madoc. Madoc owns a local security firm in New England spanning 10 counties. Madoc had known my parents for 15 years and even was engaged to my mother before she got with my father. My half-sister Vivian is his biological daughter. They split custody of her until their deaths 13 years ago. My mother called off the engagement when she was 3 weeks pregnant not knowing she was pregnant. My mother got with my father when she was 4 months pregnant and they got married when me and my sister Taryn. We all got our fathers last name Duarte. After they died in a car crash Modoc got custody over us. I have a stepmother Oriana who never really did anything for us. But she loved her son Oak. Oak was the Result of a one night stand her friend had, his biological mother could not care for oak so Oriana took custody over Oak.

I’m sitting here in a boring lecture that is dragging on for hours. I look at my watch and its only half past 11, I’ve only been here for 40 minutes, give or take. The lecture is about weapons of the 8th century, My father was a historian on Medieval war history. He used to take me, Vivian, and Taryn to a museum he worked at to look at exhibits. My phone makes a ding sound. It’s a text from my foster father Madoc.

"when is your lecture over?".

"40 minutes, it takes me 20 minutes to get back home though". I text back.

I wait for a reply but I’m only left on read. The door opens and HE walks in. Cardan Greenbrier walks in holding ice coffee from some hipster coffee shop with a smug look on his face. His curly black 3c hair is in a bun out his face, he is wearing black designer pants and a designer graphic shirt. He is walking up the row i'm sitting in.

I’ve known Cardan since I was 8. Then I was taller than him even though he was a grade ahead of me and I would occasionally would come over to his home to play a video game or play with Bratz dolls. He belonged to the Greenbrier family a disgustingly rich family in New England. His father owned real-estate in 30 different neighborhoods in Elfhame alone. His mother was an adult film star who home wrecked the Greenbrier family nearly causing a divorce. His mother served a unrelated 10-year sentence for tax fraud when he was 7 months old. Not like she actually cared to the boys’ needs. He was mostly raised by a nanny. The nannies would quit after 7 months. But when we were kids we were the best of friends and frequently would come over to my home to play.

He was nicer before he became a total fucking cunt in middle school. We made friendship bracelets from embroidery thread and exchanged them the summer we would go to 6th grade. It was only in school that he did a 180 and pretended I didn’t even exist. He had moved in with his brother Balekin. For a lack of better words, Balekin is what you would call a Man-Whore. Balekin owns (and stars in)an adult film studio that racks up 10 million a year. He had moved back in when he was 11. So his family could cover up that his father was in a relationship with one of Balkin’s actresses, Asha Azad a 21-year-old actress when Eldred was well into his 50s. To avoid further scandal Balekin took custody of Cardan and Eldred paid Asha Cardan’s mother 1 million in hush money.

He proceeds to trip and his coffee spills all over my 5-year-old laptop I worked my ass for. My white shirt is now see-thru from the ice coffee, I had chosen to wear a sheer bra today. BIG MISTAKE. "sorry I wasn't looking where I was going". He says in his most callous voice. "what? you going to do something?". He is trying to get a rise out of me and its working. He sits right next to me even though there are 10 seats he could have chosen from. My laptop refuses to turn on and my phone is damaged from his coffee. Just my lucky fucking day. I’m short on rent and need my laptop. My phone I could get replaced as its still under warranty or put it in rice. Though I need rice for my meal prep.

“the fuck is wrong with you?” I glare at him and he is on his phone texting his girlfriend, Nicasia. He ignores me and keeps smiling at his phone. He glances my way and looks at me like I said something crazy.“what is your fucking problem? Do you know how much that costs me?”. He goes back to giggling at his phone he frowns for a minute before smiling like a doofus. I snatch it and look at the screen on his phone. It’s his group chat and he’s talking about how annoying I am. The chat consist of Cardan, his friends Locke, Nicasia, and Valerian. Its blazing with texts too fast to read.

Cardan’s first text reads, “remember Jude? I tripped and accidentally spilled coffee on her. Now she’s freaking out". The reply to it is from Valerian, “is Jude the one with the fat ass and big tits. She’s a butter face but at least her body saves it”. She grips the phone tightly. The text was liked by Locke and replied to with a “yes" with a skull emoji by Nicasia. Tears prick my eyes as I try to control my rage.

I pack my thing and walk out the lecture hall. I calm down and go to the designated smoking/vaping area behind the H building. I pull out a cigarette and light it, inhaling the smoke. The door opens and Cardan walks to me, he dingles my keys. “didn’t think you would like cute things Jude.” He mocks. I snatch it back and pocket my keys into my pants. He walks closer to me and grimaces at the cigarette in my hand. “You know those will kill you, can’t have your pretty face ruined by smoking, would we?” he looks at my face and his lips curl up to a fucking stupid, annoying smile.“thought I was a- oh what did your friend say-" I spit the word ‘your’ with venom. “that I’m a big tit butter face?”. I inhale the smoke big and choke on the smoke. He pats my back and hands me a bottle of water. I look up at his black eyes lined with blue liner and glitter. That looked genuinely concerned but I remembered how much of a total cunt he is. I slap the bottle away and stomp out my cigarette. “suck my dick Cardan!” I yell at him Grabbing my bag. I walk away and he speaks “would love to but I’m sure you don’t have one" he says in a sardonic tone.

I get into my car and go to my apartment. Once inside I go on my tablet which had been connected to my phone and look at the text back from Madoc.
“meet me at 7pm at Ardente” the text below it says who will be there, the list is mostly my family and Modoc’s associates. But the last name makes her ears red with furry, “your old friend cardan".

I place my phone into rice and my laptop too. I worry about what I should do but I have a dinner party to get to.

The dress code for Ardente was formal but not black tie, I wore a red strappy midi dress that did now shy away from showing my ample cleavage. I put my hair up with a French pin my sister Taryn got me, when she went to Dijon for a Euro-trip where she toured 15 different countries for 3 months. I smeared on a skin tint and powder my face with a setting powder. Next came brown blush, burgundy eyeshadow, mascara, and lips. I lined my lips with a brown liner and toped it with pink gloss. I finish the look with kohl liner. I put on jewelry and head out I put on my smart watch on as it still worked.

When I arrived I was 10 minutes late the only spot was between Oak and Cardan. Oak runs to me and hugs me. “Jude! Jude! I missed you”. I pat his head and pinch his rosy cheeks. Oak has bouncy curly blond hair, he’s in slacks and a white button up with a tie. His leg is in a cast, probably from playing junior soccer for his elementary school. On The cast are names of his friend Suren and I see Cardan’s name on the cast with the message ‘get well soon'. Cardan is making love to a glass of wine, and looks up and smiles at me. “Jude, I didn’t think you’d come.” He pulls out my chair and I get into my seat.

He is wearing a 3-piece suit, a red silk shirt, a black jacket and slacks. He reeks of Versace pour homme and it fills my nostrils with his musk. In this suit I can see his toned chest, if he was anyone else id want to rub my hand on it and explore the uncharted water of his chest. “you look ravishing tonight jude" he sniffs around me and smirks. “really? Cheap purfume?” I shoot him a scowl.

Ardente is the most expensive Brazilian steak house in Maine. My biological father was Brazilian and I had grown up eating all sorts of dishes from Brazil my father would make. I always had a sweet tooth and favored brigadeiros. It’s a ball of chocolate and sweetened condensed milk sprinkled with sprinkles . My foster father made sure me and Taryn were connected to our roots even after my father had passed.

At this restaurant I get a Caipirinha to start off with, then 2 more. Madoc is talking to Eldred about some business venture. I'm about to ask the waiter for one more before Cardan shoots me a disgusted look, “Are you sure you need another drink?” he asks incredulously. “I can handle my liquor!” I shoot back at him. He slides me water and tells me to sip it, I sip the ice-cold water and I stumble to the bathroom.

The bathroom is a single stall and I throw up all over myself. I lose track of time and I hear a knock. “Jude are you in there?”. “no!” I reply back. “I know you are in there your family is worried.” For a minute he sounded worried as well about Jude's wellbeing. I stumble out the bathroom and cardan is standing there holding the fabric napkin. He rakes his eyes up my form annoyed, “you are a grown ass woman!”. He looks away and lowers his gaze as if something surprised him. “Jude, your top its exposed" his tone is hushed. His face is crimson with embarrassment and he hands me his jacket, warm from his body. I cover up my Exposed chest with my bodice and hand him my jacket before stumbling on the floor.

I wake up in my car, but in the passenger seat. I look to see who’s driving and its cardan. I doze to sleep wrapped up in his jacket. I dream that he carried me home and that he carried me to bed. I dream he washed me with a towel advoiding any sensitive areas. I dreamed that he closed the door and wished me well “stay safe, please" it sounded like a plea. A desperate plea. I still smell his cologne and it aroused me. I close my heavy lids and smile as I drift to deep sleep.

I dream that night of him and him kissing every part of me, he lowers his pants. But I can’t open my eyes and he lifts my sturdy legs over his shoulders . I feel his warm breath on my skin he kisses every mole that liters my skin. He prods my folds with his cock and THRUSTS.

I wake up sweaty and disoriented recoiling at the dream I just had. I go to my phone thats still inside the rice and see if it will turns on. Im relived when the image of an old family photo flashes. I check the time and relize im late for my job and i get ready to go to work.

Chapter Text

Jude is currently in my arms, she reeks of vomit and her disgusting cheap perfume. “I knew this would happen! You fucking idiot!” I tell her. She drools and groans and is in no fucking state to get to safety or even walk without getting hurt. I wrap my jacket around her shoulders, for whatever reason I don’t know. I refuse to know, I ignore the crushing feeling in my chest and walk her back to the table.

Jude is a hot fucking mess of vomit and smeared make up. Her hair in a frizzy mess her dress reeking of vomit and alcohol. Her cheap perfume invades my nose. She looks utterly pathetic. But I refuse to let anything horrible happen to her.

“holy shit" Taryn shouts too loudly. The other patrons look at us in annoyance. Feeling their harsh gazes on us, I turn to Madoc.

               Madoc looks up and groans, “ah, Greenbriar I see that you brought Jude back.” Jude’s head is on my chest as I attempt to sit her down. “mom? What's wrong with Jude?” Oak asks too curiously. Oriana shoots Madoc a look that says ‘do something’, Madoc asks how many drinks Jude has had. “4 drinks and half of a 5^th drink.”. I attempted to get her to drink water but she’s far too drunk to even understand what is happening.

Madoc asks “can she even walk?”. I shake my head firmly. Everyone at this table is either 10 or 4 drinks deep, luckily, I only had 1 singular glass of wine. “can I take her home" It comes out has a beg than an ask. Madoc gives me her apartment number and address, thinking we are still close friends like we used to be.

I grab her purse and hold her steady. I say goodbye to her family and my father. “I’m taking her home,” Madoc shoots me a venomous glare that could make grown men fall to their knees in fear. I walk outside of the restaurant and look for her car. Her car is a 2007 Honda Civic in red; it’s covered in ridiculous stickers. I find her car and help walk Jude to her car. I open her car door and put her in the passenger seat of the vehicle. Her eyes are drooping as I buckle her into the car.

               I get into the car and put the key into the ignition. She has a CD inside the CD player, it plays a Beatles song. She has a collection of CDs many look old and worn. I turn the music up and a song with her name is playing in the car. She glances up at me when I’m at a traffic light and lingers on my form for a minute. She still looks beautiful even when she’s a mess. A beautiful mess. I push these feelings I thought I killed years ago down. But it never died and it probably never will die.

I reach the parking lot of her apartment and park in her spot. Her eyes are closed and she’s delirious, I nudge her to wake but she just groans in pain. I pick her up from the passenger seat and lift her up bridal style. We arrive at her shoe box apartment and step inside of her studio apartment. The smell of cigarettes and candles filled the air attacking my nostrils.

It’s not much maybe 600 square feet*, enough to fit a queen-sized bed, couch and table. Her apartment is decorated sparsely, only a basic furniture and a few books fill her humble abode. I carry her to her bed, the bed has a green duvet with snakes on it and she still sleeps with a stuffed animal, multiple stuffed animals. I lay her down and push her hair out of her face, she nuzzles against my hand. I pull away from her face and she pouts,

I get up and go into the bathroom to get a rag. I wet a rag that has seen better days and ring out the access water. Walking back to her bed I notice the laptop I spilled my coffee on, guilt pricks my chest. It had truly been an accident, but considering how I betrayed her 5 years ago I wouldn’t forgive myself either. I’m a horrible friend I deserve her hatred. Maybe till the end of time. I’m still disgusted by Valerian, me and Jude may not be on speaking terms but she’s still a person. Valerian is a rake of a man, he only sees women as sex objects. Locke isn’t better than Valerian, in high school he pretended to ask Jude out just to get a rise out of her. I’m slowly trying to distance myself from these animals. Nicaisa has some redeeming qualities but the bar is so low even a cockroach can reach the standards to be a half decent human.

               I wipe away the vomit that covers Jude’s mouth and chest the best I can without touching anything sensitive. She still has my jacket on its going to smell like her, cheap perfume and American Spirts yellow. Hopefully the vomit stench will be washed away when I eventually get my jacket back. Most the vomit is washed off her and I put the blanket over her. She looks peaceful like this my stomach flips just by looking at her.

               I leave a note on her nightstand explaining what happened. I look at the broken laptop and want to atone for my actions. I write my number down with my name telling her I can work something out with the laptop I broke.

I look one more time around her apartment and turn the lights off. I walk out and call an Uber to take me to Nicasia’s home. I only think of Jude the whole time I’m in the Uber, I think of what went wrong for the past 11 years. Our fathers would always drag us to events still thinking we are on speaking terms, They’re out of touch.

I walk into my apartment and my girlfriend Nicasia is on the couch in one of my shirts, I’ve been with her since junior year of high school though I’ve been wanting to split with her for a few months. Fearing retaliation from my inner circle I do nothing. Yea maybe im a coward but I’d rather be a coward than lonely. “I am an asshole” I think to myself.

“You’re back" Nicasia is on the couch high and holding her cart. She walks up to me and kisses me. “do you have any more" I ask, needing to burn the edge off me I take a hit from her cart. Her eyes are red and she has a stupid face on her face. Her Blue ass length hair is in a bun and she’s in nothing but my shirt. We are on the couch before I can even realize what is happening.

Our clothes are in a pile and she’s ridding me trying to get me hard. I’m still slightly soft, it’s only when I look up, I imagine Jude in Nicasia’s spot. I imagine it’s her riding me, her bouncing on my cock. I’m hard just by imagining Jude’s ass bouncing on my cock. I imagine her ample breasts bouncing on me, I kiss her and when I look again its Nicasia and she holds my face. She had already climaxed and I cant shake the idea of jude being the one on top of me. After a while I finish on Nicasia’s stomach. I take a cold shower trying to shake off the visions of Jude.

I get in bed and drift to sleep. My brain flood with visions of what I imagine Jude to look like under the baggy shirt and sweats she usually wears.

In my dream I imagine her in my bed, her under me, that tan face red. I tangle my hands in her curly brown hair and whisper praises to her. “so beautiful” I moan, Jude oh Jude how perfect she is. She is bare faced in my dreams her mascara smeared and lipstick all over our faces, she tries to hide her flaws like her acne, but I don’t care. She IS the most beautiful woman ever she is the perfect woman.

In my dream Jude is on my cock and I’m holding her ass moaning her name. “Jude. Jude. Jude. Jude. Oh sweet perfect Jude". When she’s about to come I wake up from this nightmare of a dream.

Morning light peaks thru the window and the spot next to me is empty. Nicaisa is in the kitchen looking pissed. “hey babe" a greet my girlfriend and try to hug her. She just gives me the cold shoulder.

“I got to go to work" she says ignoring me. Nicasia works at as a model for an indie magazine. She closes the door and I get a text on my phone

               Its from Jude, “you were in my apartment?” the next text reads “you better fix my laptop it wont turn on!".

               I reply back, “where are you?” then “I can explain everything”, I see the 3 dots from Jude. I send “I want to make things right between us".

She left me on read.