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What Ludwig saw when he opened the front door to his home was not something he ever expected to find.
The sight before him was a gruesome one, to say the least. Feliciano straddling what was clearly a very dead man with a kitchen knife raised high in the air as he stopped mid-stab under the scrutiny of Ludwig’s gaze. He was frozen in place, like time had stopped as soon as they laid eyes on each other. His focus turned to the man under Feliciano, chest now a gaping red hole from the amount of times it was plunged into. Body crumpled and bent at odd angles in places, like their bones had been broken in the process of whatever Feliciano had done before he got home.
“Lud…”
His breath caught and the name on Feliciano’s tongue evaporated. Eyes widening, it seemed he had come out of whatever daze he was in and realized the severity of the situation.
“It’s not…it’s not what it…looks like…”
Feliciano released his grip on the knife, making a metal clang on the floor and smearing a bit of already spilled blood on the ground. His vision welled up with thick tears and he got up and held his hands behind him, like he was a child with his hand caught in the cookie jar trying to hide the evidence of his guilt.
“I…I didn’t mean to…It’s just…he was…he…”
He screwed his eyes shut and barreled himself into Ludwig’s arms, curling his head into his chest and wetting his shirt with warm tears and stray splotches of blood from his own clothes.
“Oh, Ludwig—don't be mad! I didn’t mean to! He just…we were just talking and he…he was saying all these things! Awful—dirty things about you! I couldn’t stand it! I just wanted him to stop and the only way was…was to…” He gripped the cloth of Ludwig’s shirt tighter. “Please don’t hate me!”
Ludwig looked down at the messy, sobbing object of his desires clinging to him and found a complicated mix of feelings in his gut. But strangely, none felt of immediate panic.
“Feliciano, slow down.” Ludwig placed a firm, but comforting, grip on his shoulders. He looked him in the eyes, looking for any sign of malice behind them, but coming up empty. “Tell me how this happened.”
Feliciano’s tears wouldn’t stop flowing, he was starting to choke on them and hiccup in between his words so much it was difficult to understand him. Ludwig instead resorted to asking simple questions that could be answered with one word, until he calmed down enough to elaborate.
“Are you hurt?”
“A—a little.” He held up his arm, which had a cut long-ways on the forearm. It seemed that—whoever this was—tried to fight back against Feliciano. Despite its appearance however, it didn’t seem to go very deep.
He looked around the kitchen, it was a mess compared to when he left the house. A vase that was on the table was knocked over and shattered, water and flowers mixing with the blood on the floor. The block had a knife missing and was slightly ajar, like it had been forcibly yanked from in the heat of the moment. And as he scanned the room, he found that the knife was not the only thing Feliciano had used; a cast-iron skillet that normally hung above the stove was lying to the side of the man’s head (Or at least, what was left of it.), presumably used to knock him down before he had resorted to the knife.
“Are you mad?”
Ludwig put his attention back on Feliciano. His friend, who he would have assumed innocent and passive before now, who was now covered in another man’s blood but looking up at him with such desperation it hurt. It pained his heart to see him this upset.
“…No…I’m not mad…” The words came out slowly, like he was still reeling from the sight and letting it sink in.
Ludwig’s mind slipped into an almost simplistic, logical straight line of thinking. It was all he could do to organize his thoughts when everything felt all too overwhelming.
Okay, okay—Feliciano is hurt. We need to get him patched up first and foremost.
He stiffly, but gently, led Feliciano to the bathroom. Grabbing a roll of bandages from the medicine cabinet, he began to clean Feliciano’s cut under the water tap, mouthing a quiet apology when he flinched at the slight pain. His crying still hasn’t stopped, but his breathing had steadied.
“It looks like it’s just a flesh wound, nothing too serious thankfully.”
Holding up Feliciano’s hand, he began to tentatively wrap the bandages around his arm. He knew he shouldn’t be thinking it right now, but part of him was bashful at getting to hold his hand for even a second.
“There, it’s not too tight is it?”
“…No, it’s fine.” His voice was still a little shaky, but he seemed to have stopped sobbing enough to speak.
Alright, now we need to address…
“Feliciano?”
He hummed in response, wringing his hands together.
“I need you to answer some things for me. Can you do that?”
“Yes—yes I think so.”
Ludwig gathered his thoughts for a moment.
“Does anyone know…that they’re here?”
He shook his head. “No, just you.”
“Are you absolutely positive?”
He considered for a moment longer. “Yes, I’m positive.”
Ludwig brushed his hair back in an attempt to stay calm. “Good, that’s good...” Or at least, as good as something can be in this situation.
“Okay Feliciano, this is important, so listen closely.” He nodded. “I need you to gather whatever you…used on him. Put them in the sink, I’ll take care of them. Did you break anything besides the vase?”
“…A cup.”
“Okay, can you clean those up?”
He nodded once more. “Anything for you, Ludwig.”
ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ
Ludwig sighed on the ground, tired but satisfied that he was able to get the blood out of the kitchen tile. The man’s body had been moved into trash bags to be dealt with in the morning, and Ludwig was a little surprised at how desensitized Feliciano looked to it. Indifferent almost.
“Ludwig?”
Feliciano had since stopped his nervous fidgeting, but still kept his voice quieter than normal.
“Yes? Is there something wrong?”
“Well…I…I was wondering if you could help me clean off. The blood is getting sticky…”
Ludwig stood back up. “Sure…I’ll help. Wait in the bathroom, I’ll run a bath in a minute.”
He looked down at himself, he wasn’t looking too good either. Cleaning up was surprisingly messy.
Ludwig walked to the bathroom to find Feliciano sitting on the toilet lid, hands held together on his lap. He turned the knobs on the bath and checked the water to make sure it was warm.
“We are going to have to burn these clothes, sorry.”
“It’s okay, I wasn’t attached to them.”
Feliciano stood and began unbuttoning Ludwig’s shirt, making him bashfully dumbfounded.
“…What are you doing?”
He looked a little surprised. “Oh…I thought you were getting in with me. Will you get in with me?”
Ludwig blushed but ultimately agreed to, beginning to strip Feliciano as well.
The bath almost overflowed with two people in it (Ludwig on the bottom with Feliciano laying on top of him.), but they made it work. He ran his fingers through Feliciano’s hair, the auburn becoming a damp shiny brown from the water. He nearly moaned, leaning into the touch.
“Ludwig…”
He would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little hot and bothered. He wanted to chastise himself for it, this was not the situation to be feeling such things. He should be horrified, disgusted, angry, anything but what he was feeling right now. But he couldn’t bring himself to be mad at Feliciano. The only thing that scared Ludwig right now wasn’t him, but what might’ve happened to him if he had been caught by anyone else.
“Ludwig, you’re always so good to me. Helping me…thank you.”
He said nothing, just rubbed his back soothingly in response. He was pulled from his thoughts when Feliciano shifted to face him.
“I love you.”
It caught him off guard, eyes widening and talking slow. “You…do?”
Feliciano lifted himself up so he was on all fours above him, almost predatory like, soapy water dripping along his body.
“I love you, Ludwig. I love you. I love you. I love you.”
Ludwig didn’t know what to say, his mind was still lagging behind him.
“I love you so much it burns. I think I’d die without you. Whenever I’m with you I feel like my heart is gonna burst open. Sometimes I want it to, so that you can feel my hot blood and let it seep into your skin, so that I can be a part of you.”
The graphic confession stunned him, Ludwig brought his hand to Feliciano’s chest, right above his wildly beating heart. He thought that might actually happen with how fast it was going. Feliciano’s breath came out in puffs.
“Tell me you love me too, please. I don’t think I could bear it if you didn’t. I want to be with you forever.”
Ludwig ran his hand up Feliciano’s body and cupped his cheek, placing a small, barely there kiss on his soft lips.
“I love you too.” Ludwig whispered. “And I’d do anything for you.”