Chapter Text
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...*Yawn*
Deadpool: (Waking up from my slumber was stranger than usual, which makes sense since it's usually depressing.)
Deadpool: "What happened last night? My headache is killing me!"
Deadpool: (Not only that, but I seem to barely remember what happened last night. Gotta question what drugs I took to give me amnesia that strong... Oh yeah, I was sleeping. Guess I can't really remember much then, huh? hmmmm looking around... wait a second... white bedsheets, bagel colored wall, normal ass room...)
Deadpool: "Who kidnapped me?"
Deadpool: (...Usually it takes them a few minutes for anyone to move, but... wait, this is a one-story apartment. Looks like a... cottage? I didn't go on vacation yet.)
Deadpool: "Hey buddy, if you're hearing this, do a better job of kidnapping me next time. This seems way too obvious!"
Deadpool: (Let's see, what's inside this cottage. A bed, a TV, a shower room, some windows, a collection of guns... the usual for kidnappers. Man, I can't wait to see what the other rooms look like then. Explosives? Blades? More Guns? Opening the door that seemed to lead out of the room, I was greeted by a... dock?)
Deadpool: "Hey, it wasn't a multi-room apartment at all!"
Deadpool: (The sun was beaming. Man, it seems like the middle of summer here with all the vibrant vegetation and the water and the-)
???: "Hey, you!"
Deadpool: (Finally, the kidnapper reveals himself. Let's see, he's wearing a black and gold shirt, a dragon tattoo, a gold necklace... seems like a normal thug... Gosh, why couldn't it have been someone actually cool?)
Deadpool: "Alright, before I go ahead and kill you, what's your reason for kidnapping me now?"
???: "Hmph, rude introduction for someone speaking to the son of Argus. If you intend to kill me, I would suggest an alternative action. Facing a demi-god in combat is a foolish move."
Deadpool: (Half-god, huh? Maybe I was kidnapped by a cool person. Plus, he has a pretty serious and deep tone in his voice. All cool dudes have that.)
???: "As for this kidnapping, I am not the one you seek. I woke up on this island about five minutes ago. It seems like we may have been both kidnapped."
Deadpool: (Double kidnapping, huh? Verrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyy interesting.)
Deadpool: "Oh well then, if we're in the same boat, why didn't ya say so?"
???: "You're the one who threatened me!"
Deadpool: "Threatened, greeted, all the same to me. Speaking of greetings, allow me to properly introduce myself. Name's Wade, other name's Willson, my other other name is Deadpool."
???: "That is... a complicated way to explain it. Name's Taven, son of Deliah and Argus."
Deadpool: "Wait, hold up for a second, what was that image that popped up?"
Taven: "What do you mean?"
Deadpool: "You didn't see it or feel it or anything? There was a grey background that just popped up and said 'Taven: The Ultimate Hero'!"
Taven: "Hmmmm, that's strange."
Deadpool: "Very strange. Like Doctor Strange Strange?"
Taven: "Who?"
Deadpool: "Neh, doesn't matter!"
Taven: "So if what you're seeing is correct, we all have a title to us?"
Deadpool: "Seems that way. And why do you get to be the ultimate hero? Why couldn't it have been me?!"
Taven: "Maybe because of my quest. It is uncertain, however."
Deadpool: "Well then, I guess I have an ultimate title or thingamajig then. Wonder what it is?"
Taven: "Unfortunately, when you greeted yourself, I did not see this background that you speak of. You must find out about this title on your own."
Deadpool: "You're right. Damnit, I hate not being told answers."
Taven: "Anyways, I was going to ask you if you know where we are, but as you said, we're in the same predicament here."
Deadpool: "Uhh, boat actually. Gotta get statements right."
Taven: "And out of all people to be stuck with here on the island with, they put me with the loudest one."
Deadpool: "Hey, don't worry, I can be silent too. I just don't like being silent because of my..."
Taven: "Hey, don't worry. As much as it is annoying to deal with, I can put up with your blabbering. Something trapped us on this island. We must work together to figure out where we are and who it is!"
Deadpool: (Now I see why they call this guy the ultimate Hero. Focused, leader-esc qualities, handsome looks. Definitely the best option I could've run into for someone else kidnapped, although I'm not sure he'd say the same about me.)
Deadpool: "Wait, you keep saying island. How do you know this place is an island?"
Taven: "Well, I had some time to explore the island when I woke up. I didn't meet any new people because I took a few steps out of this area, but I did see that we were on grassy and sand-filled lands with water surrounding the location."
Deadpool: "So then, someone kidnapped us and put us on an island, huh? The only person I can think about doing that to us is either Jeff Probst or Jeffery-"
Taven: "We must get a move on if the sun is up, no time for joke-making."
Deadpool: "Hey, don't cut me off, even if you are right!"
Taven: "I looked around this area for a bit, and it seemed to be a hotel with cottages. There may be people nearby, so I would suggest we investigate here first."
Deadpool: "Yeah, you're right. Alright, let's do this!"
Deadpool: (Damn, Taven really is someone I can trust, huh? Leader and all.)
Deadpool: (We walked away from the dock area with cottages, and sure enough, there was a hotel. Not just a hotel, but a pool in the center, and a burnt-down old building beside it. Ya know the usual stuff you see on an island. Standing by the sun-reflecting pool was a man dressed in weird, tattered clothing. Looking straight out of a homeless shelter. He also had some buckled boots, this strange wheel on his back, a belt, a sword, and from the back... a live squid? Red bandana too. I'm betting on this guy being a pirate fisherman. That or a fisher pirateman)
Taven: "Hello, sir. Can you hear me?"
???: "Ach?"
Deadpool: (What the hell was that weird noise he made just now? He slowly turned around, and what he was became clear. Or rather, it became clear.)
Taven: "What in Argus' name!?"
???: "What, you've never seen a skeleton before!"
Deadpool: "AHHHHHHH- Wait, are you that skeleton in my closet? Sir Skeleinton, right?"
???: "Your humor amuses me, mortal. I'm a different skeleton, however. The name's Spinal, Yaahahahahahaha!"
Deadpool: "Ya see it now? Right there!"
Taven: "You insist upon its existence, yet I still do not see this 'background' you speak of."
Deadpool: "Oh, c'mon, you don't see it?!!? Says 'Spinal: The Ultimate Pirate' right there!"
Spinal: "Ultimate pirate, huh? Ya ha haa I like that title."
Taven: "Doesn't show up for me still."
Deadpool: (Welp, I guess the fourth wall powers only belong to me.)
Taven: "I'm Taven, and this is Wade."
Deadpool: "Deadpool! At your service!"
Spinal: "Ahh, nice to make your acquaintance."
Taven: "Now, I must ask, do you know anything about this island we're on?"
Spinal: "Ach? I may be a pirate, but I don't have any information about this place. Sorry."
Deadpool: "Damnit, and I was banking on the pirate."
Taven: "Thank you for your cooperation anyway, Spinal."
Spinal: "Yach, don't mention it!"
Deadpool: (The high-pitched voice, the sense of a maniacal madman... Perfect skeleton in the closet material. If only Sir Skeleinton was here to meet with him.)
Deadpool: (Taven and I left Spinal and moved onto the hotel, which seemed to be two stories tall. If there are cottages outside, why would there need to be a hotel? Geez, interior design these days. And what's with the name Mirai? Moving inside, we were greeted by a lobby with a set of comfy furniture, arcade machines, alcohol bottles, ya know, some basic things needed for paradise. There were some windows and a set of stairs that led to the second floor along with a reception desk, but who cares about those, am I right?)
???: "Hey, you two!"
Deadpool: (Someone's calling for us, great. And just when I thought I would take some alcohol with me back home. Alright, let's see who we got here... blonde hair, red jacket, dark-looking sneakers, and yoga pants. Looks like a college freshman to me. Sounds like one too.)
???: "I was wondering if-"
Taven: "Stop there, wanderer!"
Deadpool: "Woah, Taven chill!"
Taven: "What?"
Deadpool: "They don't seem harmful, why are you stopping them?"
???: "Yeah, chill out dude, it's not like I'm going to harm you or anything."
Taven: "*sigh* Very well then. I guess it's an old habit from my quest."
???: "I was wondering if you two know anything about this place, that's all"
Taven: "Our information on this island is as limited as yours."
Deadpool: "We just woke up a few minutes ago and now we're just investigating."
???: "Alright then, so another pair of people who also don't know what's going on. My name is Samantha, Sam for short. I hope we can work together."
Taven: "What title does she own?"
Deadpool: "So you still can't see the backgrounds, huh? Welp, guess I'm useful to you after all."
Sam: "Title?"
Deadpool: "Oh, yeah. Every person I've met has introduced themselves to me with a background switch and an ultimate title thingy. Yours is the 'Ultimate Survivor'."
Taven: "Ultimate survivor? Interesting..."
Sam: "I guess I was given it because of the whole Washington Lodge incident."
Deadpool: "Washington Lodge incident?"
Sam: "Yeah, it was one hell of a night to say the least..."
Deadpool: (Jesus, just by the way she said that, I get why she has that title now.)
Taven: "So, ignoring this 'Washington Lodge incident', we are all in the same predicament here."
Sam: "Yeah, we sure as hell are. 16 people all stranded on a remote island in the middle of nowhere. Don't you find that a little strange?"
Taven: "Wait, 16 people?"
Sam: "Oh yeah, you guys said you just woke up. This island has a few other locations with people there. Just counted, and it seems like there are 16, including you guys."
Deadpool: (16 strangers all washed up on an island? And this isn't a reality show or an episode of Lost? So confusing.)
Taven: "Where may we find these people?"
Sam: "Well, from what I've found, there's this hotel, a supermarket, a beach with a beach house, a hospital, a castle for some reason, and a military base. You'll probably find people there if anything. There are two people upstairs right now."
Taven: "Well, thank you for your help, Samantha."
Sam: "Please, just call me Sam."
Deadpool: "Well, thank you for your help, Sam."
Sam: "No problem."
Deadpool: (Despite that whole "Washington Lodge incident" thingy, she seems pretty nice. Probably helped her survive the incident. If only I knew about what that incident actually was?... hazing ritual?)
Taven: "Now's not the time to ponder, we must move to the upper floor!"
Deadpool: "Ugh, fine, I'll stop."
Deadpool: (Sam left us as Taven snapped me out of pondering. Gosh, why is he so pushy? I guess he wants to find a way out fast, which is understandable. I just don't really care cuz I'm getting outta here no matter what.)
Deadpool: (We hurried up the stairs to investigate the second floor of the hotel. It was a... restaurant of some sort? Why the hell would the restaurant be upstairs? They had the perfect opportunity for an outdoor restaurant, and they just ignored it. Wasted opportunities, man. Anyways, the restaurant was much brighter than the lobby due to how open it was. The back and right side were completely gone of walls, having open spaces like some sort of invisible door. There were a bunch of tables set up as if they were prepared for a plethora of guests. That kinda doesn't make sense unless they prepared to kidnap the 16 of us)
Taven: "Look, there are two others here."
Deadpool: (He was right, both of them were chicks, and both were standing. One was looking nervous, the other was looking closed off. We decided to talk to the nervous one first, seeing how she seemed slightly more friendly than the closed-off one. She wore glasses, had a ponytail, a worn-out brown shirt with rolled-up sleeves, and blue skinny jeans with brown boots. Seems like she also survived something. Could it be the dreaded "Washington Lodge incident"?!?!?!?)
Taven: "Good day, madame."
Deadpool: "'Good day, madame'? Jeez, I didn't know I was teamed up with a knight."
???: "Hello..?"
Taven: "My affiliate and I over here just woke up a few minutes ago."
Deadpool: "Can confirm, we were kidnapped."
Taven: "We were wondering if you have any knowledge regarding our current status."
Deadpool: "In other words, you got any clue about this damn place!?"
???: "Unfortunately, I don't have any knowledge about this island."
Taven: "Very well then. May I ask for your name?"
???: "My name? It's Claudette Morel. Sorry if I'm nervous."
Deadpool: "Botanist, eh?"
Claudette: "How do you know about that?"
Deadpool: "Oh, yeah, I have this weird little thingy where I see a background with an ultimate title when someone introduces themselves to me."
Taven: "Botany? You bear knowledge about plants."
Claudette: "Yup, mainly for medical purposes. Botany knowledge may save your life, after all."
Deadpool: "Ahh, great! So if I were to get split in half, you'd have the perfect recovery plants, right?"
Claudette: "Split in half?!!?"
Taven: "Don't mind my associate, he's comparable to a jester."
Deadpool: "Jester?! I would've taken Joker much better!"
Claudette: "A-anyways... Everyone doesn't seem to know where we are. It's scary."
Taven: "It is, considering how there are 16 of us here."
Claudette: "Well, wherever we are, it's better than the shithole I was stuck in."
Deadpool: (Shithole, hmmm... considering her clothes, I wonder what she's been through? She sounds slightly nervous so it may have something to do with her demeanor.)
Taven: "My apologies, I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Taven."
Deadpool: "And I'm Deadpool but if you wanna shorten it, I guess Wade works."
Claudette: "Taven and Wade. Got it."
Taven: "Well, it was nice meeting you, Claudette. We must go now."
Deadpool: "Yeah, nice meeting my potential future pharmacist!"
Claudette: "Yeah, it was nice meeting you guys, too."
Deadpool: (She's nervous yet nice. Pretty standard introvert trait, but it clearly tells me she's someone who can be trusted, or at least, the bare minimum of trust.)
Deadpool: (We walked away from Claudette and moved on to the closed-off chick. She seemed pretty athletic. Must be a part of her job or something. She wore a yellow headband with night goggles and a white top that was heavily padded with green armor. She also had green shorts, with some bandages, a shin pad, an armband, a... mini wrist-watch computer? She was staring at... a camera?)
???: "Have you noticed it yet?"
Taven: "Noticed what?"
???: "The monitors and cameras surrounding the island."
Deadpool: "Now that you mention it, I remember there being a camera in the lobby downstairs. Same with a monitor."
Taven: "There was also one outside the hotel and in the cottages."
Deadpool: (Whoops, forgot to write that down when I woke up. Made me suspect it was Jeff Probst who was the one behind this kidnapping.)
???: "It's a sign."
Taven: "A sign of what?"
???: "That someone is watching us."
Deadpool: "WHA- wait, that's kinda obvious. What else would the camera be used for?"
???: "It indicates that there is indeed someone who kidnapped us."
Taven: "You're right! No other explanations for the cameras. But for what purpose would they kidnap us?"
???: "That... I don't know yet."
Deadpool: (Someone was watching us, and they must be our kidnapper... It sounds so surreal. Kidnapping 16 people. At least for a reality show, we'd sign some sort of waiver... or maybe we did and just have amnesia... Nah, probably got kidnapped)
???: "I should introduce myself. Call me Orchid."
Deadpool: "Woah, where'd ya get those glow sticks?"
Taven: "Those weapons look like mini-light swords. I've seen these cybernetic ninjas use them before... any association?"
Deadpool: "Cybernetic ninjas!? That sounds cool as shit!!"
Orchid: "I do not know of these 'cybernetic ninjas' you speak about. These were provided to me by my line of work."
Taven: "Deadpool, I must ask, what was her title?"
Deadpool: "Let's see... Oh yeah, 'Ultimate Secret Agent'!"
Taven: "Secret agent?!"
Orchid: "So it seems I have a title that exposes my work... how do you know about this?"
Deadpool: "Oh, strange 4th wall-breaking powers. It lets me see someone's ultimate title thingy after they've been introduced."
Orchid: "So now that you know my title, I must ask, what are yours?
Taven: "I bear the title of Ultimate Hero."
Deadpool: "And I... still don't know my title. Can't see my own background. Probably'll find out later."
Orchid: "Interesting..."
Taven: "Orchid, outside of the cameras, do you know anything else about this island?"
Orchid: "Before I answer that, what are your names? You haven't told me yours yet."
Taven: "My apologies. I am Taven, son of Argus."
Deadpool: "And I'm Deadpool! But you can just call me Wade."
Orchid: "Very well then."
Taven: "Now, back to my question, is there any other knowledge you have on this island?"
Orchid: "...You can find that out on your own. Agents don't share."
Taven: "Very well then."
Deadpool: (She has this attitude to her... It's like sassy, focused, mysterious, and sexy all in one. Her voice too. I'm getting major "touch me and I'll break your face" vibes from it.)
Deadpool: (Taven and I walked away from Orchid, who went back to looking at the camera. Something about her is interesting, but I don't know what it is.)
Taven: "It seems like this hotel has nothing else in store for us. We must explore what other locations there are."
Deadpool: "If what I can remember, which is usually a lot because my memory works really well, Sam said there were more locations outside of this hotel."
Taven: "A supermarket, a beach with a beach house, a hospital, a castle, and a military base. All strange locations on a presumably uninhabited island. They might boast some sort of clue there."
Deadpool: "You're right! We should investigate each of those locations!"
Taven: "Alright then. Let's move."
Deadpool: (We left the hotel, with Taven leading the way. We were back outside by the pool, and the sun was still shining. Must've woken up early in the morning or something. If only I had a watch with me... Neh, doesn't matter! As I left the restaurant, I noticed someone new walking around the pool area.)
Taven: "Hey!"
Deadpool: (And of course, Taven engages with them. Man, he really wants to talk to everyone instead of actually investigating the island. Well, I guess if we're stuck here, it's the right call to introduce ourselves to people, but we wouldn't be stuck here, right? Anyway, I got a closer look at the person. They had slicked-back blonde hair and sunglasses as if they were prepared for this kidnapping. However, their all-black tactical clothing and trench coat made it seem pretty obvious that they weren't prepared.)
???: "...Yes?"
Taven: "We are wanderers of this island, and we wanted to know if you had any idea where we were."
Deadpool: "'Wanderers of this island'? Could you have not made that any weirder to understand... Wait a minute."
Taven: "What?"
Deadpool: "I recognize this guy..."
Deadpool: (Something about this guy seems familiar... not like 'rival' levels of familiar, but more like 'I've seen him before' levels of familiar. His low-pitched voice I've also heard before)
???: "I recognize you as well, Wade. We've met in combat."
Deadpool: "Met in combat... Ohhhhhhh I get it now. Thanks, Marvel vs. Capcom 3!"
Taven: "You two recognize each other?"
???: "Yes, but probably not well enough. As for you, I do not know who you are. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Albert Wesker, glad to make your acquaintance.
Taven: "Well, it's nice to meet you, Albert."
Wesker: "Please, just Wesker is fine. I know of Deadpool, I don't know of you, however."
Taven: "The name's Taven, Ultimate Hero."
Wesker: "So, you have a title? Fascinating."
Deadpool: "Oh, I totally forgot to mention yours when you were introduced. Your ultimate title was 'Ultimate Squad Leader' or something."
Taven: "A leader? So I can rely on you?"
Wesker: "Yes. I'm one of the best you can ask for. In fact, it is most likely in your best interest to assist me."
Taven: "I wouldn't doubt that, considering how we're all stuck on this island. Speaking of which, do you know anything about it?"
Wesker: "Unfortunately, no. This island has never entered my jurisdiction."
Taven: "Hmmm, well, you two know each other, right?"
Deadpool: (How does he always have slicked back hair like that? Does he just douse himself in gel 24/7?)
Taven: "Deadpool?"
Deadpool: "Oh, sorry. Was just thinking, lol. Wait, did I just use lol in conversation? lmao. Wait, did I just-"
Taven: "No time for making jokes! Answer my question; you two know each other, right?"
Deadpool: "Oh, well, ya see, I only know he's in this game with me and that I've faced him a few times. Unfortunately, he was not high up on my synergy charts, and I didn't even have interactions with him. Not even in the cutscenes!!!"
Wesker: "...You can probably see why I didn't want to interact with him."
Taven: "I see it clearly... Anyway, we must continue with our mission to find out the secret of this island. It was nice meeting you, Wesker."
Wesker: "Please, the pleasure was mine."
Deadpool: (I don't know what it is about him, but he's somewhat off-putting. I suppose we can trust him in this situation, but I do know he was rivals with a guy with guns. Don't remember what his deal was with him though... Ah, well, guess we can trust him if he's the ultimate squad leader.)
Deadpool: (Wesker smirked as Taven and I left the hotel. It was semi-friendly, semi-creepy, and sprinkled with a little bit of mystery on top. When we left the Hotel, we were greeted by the sand and grass-filled land surrounded by water that Taven was talking about.)
Deadpool: "I see whatcha mean by calling this an island now. This is totally an island!"
Taven: "Yes, it most definitely is. The real question is, where is it?"
Deadpool: "You're right! Let's move on with our investigation."
Deadpool: (We quickly ran to the first location to our left. It was the supermarket Sam mentioned. It was called "Rocketpunch Market". I couldn't tell if it was a super snazzy name for a supermarket, or just a generic lame one)
Taven: "So this is the supermarket? It may contain more people or answers to this island. We must investigate there!"
Deadpool: (Taven rushed into the supermarket, and I chased after him. Taking charge is definitely a trait I'd expect someone with the title of Ultimate Hero to have. We entered the supermarket, which seemed to be filled with a bunch of goods, like a monochromatic vending machine, night vision googles, soda... couldn't see a lot though, there were two people in the way... and I recognized both!)
???: "Smile!"
*snap*
Deadpool: "Ahh, what the hell was that flash??"
???: "Relax, it's just my... Holy shit, you're Deadpool!"
Deadpool: (That voice... nearly a Bronx accent, I can recognize it. Oh dear god...)
???: "At long last, we meet again!"
Deadpool: (Yup, it's that one guy again. I think his name was Forest East or something. As the flash went away from my eyes, I noticed the camera strapped around his neck, the black hair, the white shirt, and the black jacket... Yup, I knew it!)
Taven: "Another person who recognizes you? You must be quite popular."
Deadpool: "Popular is one way to describe it. Tormented is my way to describe it."
???: "I've been trying to take this guy's maskless photo for years now! But every time we fight, he gets the best of me."
Deadpool: "Ya can't beat me in combat, Forest!"
???: "It's Frank!"
Deadpool: "Whatever, Frankie!"
Taven: "Your name is Frank?"
???: "Yup. The name's Frank. Frank West. Remember that name cuz the whole world's gonna know it once we get off this island."
Deadpool: "Oh, Frank Wack. How I didn't miss you."
Taven: "Well, you seem like a normal photographer. I'm Taven."
Frank: "Hey, I'm not just any photographer! I've covered wars, y'know?"
Deadpool: "Yup, and there he said the thing. How I reallllllllly didn't miss you."
Taven: "I'm suspecting your title is 'Ultimate Photographer'?"
Frank: "Title? What's this whole title thing about?"
Deadpool: "I'm gonna have to explain this every time, ain't I?... Nah, I don't wanna! Your title is 'Ultimate Photojournalist', not photographer for some reason."
Frank: "Well, photojournalism is my job, after all."
Deadpool: "Oh yeah, right, that's why you've covered wars instead of being there for 'em."
Frank: "W-well, y'know... Okay, well, at least I survived a zombie apocalypse!"
Taven: "A zombie apocalypse?"
Frank: "Yeah, I was stuck in a zombie-infested mall for 3 days, and there was a supermarket kinda like this. Man, it was an experience, alright."
Deadpool: (I went up to Taven's ear because I just couldn't let Frank be full of himself.)
Deadpool: "He says this and then loses to a bunch of powered-up characters and complains."
Frank: "Anyways, this place is a gold mine for photos. An uninhabited island that contains a bunch of perfectly maintained buildings and land? I gotta get the scoop on this!"
Deadpool: "Yeah, could you perhaps call one of your little choppers to get us off this island instead of taking photos!"
Frank: "No can do, pal. Woke up here randomly with no phone or anything. And even if I had one, there would probably be no cell service here."
Deadpool: "Great, so you're only good for taking our eulogy photos. Just great."
Taven: "Well, either way, it was nice meeting you, Frank."
Frank: "Don't mention it, and if you're free later, I'd like to get a shot of that tattoo on your face. Same with you, Wade. I need that maskless photo!"
Deadpool: "Hehehe no."
Deadpool: (I quickly moved Taven away from Frank. He's definitely a major pain to be on the island with. Still, I guess it's good to have another familiar face. Speaking of familiar faces, the next person... wait a minute. The blue-trench coat, white spiked-slicked back hair, large ass sword... Could it be!)
???: "Hmph, I can sense your presence. Speak your names."
Deadpool: (That voice, rudeness, arrogance... Definitely him.)
Taven: "Rather rude for an introduction... My name is Taven, son of Argus."
Deadpool: "And you already know me, Mr. Motivated."
???: "Who is this Argus?"
Taven: "My father, a god of Edenia."
???: "So you're a god yourself?"
Taven: "No, a demi-god."
???: "Then I have no business with you."
Taven: "And who are you to be saying this, scum?"
Deadpool: (I knew this was going to go wrong. I had to warn Taven or do something! So I went up to his ear.)
Deadpool: "Don't taunt him, he is extremely powerful."
???: "Me? Scum? Hmph... and to think that's how you treat a son of Sparda."
Taven: "Sparda?"
Deadpool: "Vergil, just introduce ya self already."
???: "Hmph, if it will make you leave me faster, then I will. I am Vergil, the son of Sparda."
Taven: "I would ask if you have any knowledge on this location, but you don't seem like the cooperative type."
Vergil: "I don't know anything about this island, but even if I did, why would I share it with you?"
Deadpool: (I once again leaned into Taven's ear because I knew if we stayed talking to Vergil, things wouldn't go well.)
Deadpool: "We should probably leave him, he's always been the asshole type."
Taven: "Alright, we'll leave him here. He has no business with us; we have no business with them."
Vergil: "Be gone."
Deadpool: (We swiftly left the supermarket, knowing that Taven was beginning to form a rivalry with Vergil, and I was trying to avoid the local paparazzi!)
Taven: "What's his ordeal?"
Deadpool: "Well, power does that to someone. It's his only motivation."
Taven: "Power... I, too, know someone so overtaken by power... and yet he is even more cocky than he."
Deadpool: "Yeah, he's an asshole, but I do appreciate him in my team compositions."
Taven: "What was his title?"
Deadpool: "His title? Ultimate Dark Slayer or something."
Taven: "Dark Slayer?... I guess the katana he had makes sense in that context."
Deadpool: "Anyways, I wanna move on so we can stop this friggen' prologue! It feels like it's taking ages!"
Taven: "We need to explore, you're right."
Deadpool: (We quickly ran off to the next location, the beach with a beach house. But, before we went to the beach, there was a... tunnel?)
Deadpool: "Alright, are we going into a beach or a sewer system?"
Taven: "It must be beyond this tunnel then. Hurry."
Deadpool: (And just like that, Taven ran off into the tunnel. Man, he should be wary of them sewer rats. Or even worse, sewer snakes!)
Deadpool: (I quickly ran after Taven through the tunnel and braced myself for... the back of a house? I guess it was the beach house. There was also a path, and I could hear waves crashing in the distance. This seemed like what Sam said. A beach with a beach house. Anyways, I noticed that there was a door at the back of the beach house. Now, I don't like risking breaking into places unless it's the Sanctum Sanctorum. In that case, I'm breaking in whenever to steal Strange's cool shit! But since this ain't no Sanctum Sanc-scrotum, I decided to take the front entrance. I followed the path and found the beach, with umbrellas and beach chairs. It seemed perfect for a vacation... but why are there still cameras and monitors in this area?)
???: "It seems someone is still watching us in these locations."
Deadpool: (I looked to where the handsome voice was coming from, and it was from Taven, thankfully. Thought I may have to meet a new person without his probing questions. Kinda getting used to it.)
Taven: "We can't escape this twisted evil grasp even when we're having fun. How cruel."
???: "This place... It's too familiar to me..."
Deadpool: "AHHHHHHH!"
???: "AH!"
Taven: "Why are we screaming?"
Deadpool: "The voice scared me! Made me nearly wet myself."
???: "The scream was so sudden, I-I..."
Taven: "Wait, you said this place... it's familiar to you?"
Deadpool: (Once I finally got over the brief jumpscare, I looked at the source of the normal woman's voice. It was from a girl with red hair, wearing a dark green skirt-jumper thingy with a white shirt and spotted tie. She also had a... camera with her?)
???: "I-I've been here before. Like in the past. I've been in this scenario before."
Taven: "So then you know about this island?"
???: "Y-yeah, it's called Jabberwock Island."
Taven: "Very well then. So we have found vital information after all."
Deadpool: "Wait, before we begin talks about this Jabber-the-wock Island thingy, name's Wade Wilson, but Deadpool's the alias."
Taven: "Introductions are needed, I suppose. My name is Taven, son of Argus."
???: "Nice to meet you two at least. I'm Mahiru Koizumi, I'll be counting on you two from now on."
Deadpool: "Wait, there are two photographers on the island? Now that's a celebrity's worst nightmare."
Mahiru: "I'm guessing you guys already met Frank then... Hey, why'd you react like that earlier, screaming?"
Deadpool: "Well, I don't react to jumpscares well, sweetheart."
Mahiru: "Jeez, it's totally not manly to do that."
Taven: "Anyways, you know about this island, but you sounded like it wasn't a good thing. Why is that so?"
Mahiru: "Well, me and 15 other classmates were supposed to go on a field trip here... which quickly turned into a killing game, where we were forced to kill each other."
Deadpool: "Wait, did you just say a killing game???"
Mahiru: "Yeah... I'm just praying this isn't related to that."
Taven: "Interesting... what is this 'killing game' you speak of?"
Mahiru: "Well, this stuffed bear tried to force us to kill each other. It was terrible. All I know is that 2 people were murdered there, before I suddenly passed out and woke up here."
Deadpool: (A killing game? It seems like we might have to go through that. Usually games are fun, but a killing game out of all things... sounds like a reused plot point if you ask me.)
Taven: "Another question, was there anything related to these 'ultimate' titles that Wade has been seeing upon our introductions?"
Mahiru: "Oh yeah, everyone had an ultimate talent!"
Deadpool: "So it's a talent... wonder what's mine now."
Taven: "Ultimate Hero is... an understandable talent for me."
Mahiru: "So you don't have a talent, Wade?"
Deadpool: "None that I know of. But if I did, it would probably be the ultimate badass or something cool!"
Mahiru: "Hmm, you remind me of someone else... But we don't have a means to know our talent yet, so just be patient and it'll come!"
Taven: "Well in that case, it was nice meeting you, Mahiru."
Mahiru: "Yeah, nice meeting you guys too!"
Deadpool: (Mahiru seems nice. Plus, we got valuable information from her. She's kinda bossy, but ehh, I've dealt with Piotr, I can deal with her.)
Deadpool: (Taven and I waved Mahiru goodbye, and quickly entered the beach house, which looked like a mini-white house. It was fancy, fitting the beautiful scenery perfectly. Inside also looked nice. It was clean, and the colors all blended with each other nicely. There was a refrigerator filled with various drinks, a closet, a back door entrance/exit, and a closed-off shower room. This place ain't all perfect after all.)
???: "...Hey"
Deadpool: (There was a small voice I could hear trying to greet us. Taven must have heard it as well, because he reacted to its presence by looking around. When we finally found the voice, it belonged to a small-looking high school girl with colorful hair. Music pins in her hair, buttons on her shirt, sailor dress... Definitely some sort of high school girl. Any relation to Mahiru?)
Taven: "Hello."
???: "...Did you guys also j-just wake up on this island?"
Taven: "Yes. So it seems we have found yet another person in our predicament."
Deadpool: "Allow us to introduce ourselves! Names Wade, but Deadpool's the cooler name!"
Taven: "My name is Taven, son of Argus."
???: "N-nice to meet you too. My name is Kanade Otonokoji, the ultimate guitarist. I hope we can get along!"
Deadpool: (Ahh, I didn't even need my fourth wall powers for this one. Korean words though, woulda taken me a long time if she didn't tell us what the talent was)
Taven: "A guitarist. So you like music?"
Kanade: "Yup! My twin sister was the ultimate vocalist, and together, we made tons of hits! B-but I didn't know someone would kidnap me and separate me from her."
Taven: "That is a horrid situation. Hopefully, we can figure out what's happening around here so you can see her again."
Deadpool: "We'll make it outta here, kid, don't worry."
Kanade: "You're right, we will!"
Deadpool: (She seems a little soft. Shy, yet nice. Usually how those softies turn out. Hopefully she doesn't fold if we have to stay here for multiple days.)
Deadpool: (We said our goodbyes to Kanade, and left the beach house... Well, Taven did. I made sure to take some water from the refrigerator. Hydration is important! I caught back up with Taven by exiting through the back door)
Taven: "Taking water bottles, huh?"
Deadpool: "What? *gulp* Hydration is key to survival."
Taven: "I guess you're right... Anyways, the beach seems to have been cleared off our investigation checklist."
Deadpool: "So then, I believe the hospital should be next."
Taven: "Then let's hurry over."
Deadpool: "Hey, *gulp* wait up!"
Deadpool: (Taven ran off, as expected. I quickly finished gulping down my water and chased after him. When I finally reached him, he was standing in front of the hospital entrance.)
Taven: "So, this is the hospital? Looks normal, yet out of place in all of this greenery."
Deadpool: "This gotta be where production goes to heal their challenge test runners..."
Taven: "Challenge test runners?"
Deadpool: "Ignore what I said, just pondering on stuff in case we are here for Survivor."
Taven: "You are a strange man... but I suppose it's normal to ponder on those possibilities. But ponder not, we need to explore the hospital."
Deadpool: (Taven quickly entered the hospital, and I followed. When we entered, we were greeted by the dullest-looking hospital lobby I had ever seen. Seriously. Gray colored furniture and walls, black floor, a bristal board with nothing on it. Like, no bright colors or anything. Was this really a hospital or a funeral home? As Taven and I looked around, we saw a... cheetah sitting down on a chair? Is it Halloween in Fiji right now?)
Taven: "Hello, sir."
???: "Hey, dudes!"
Deadpool: (The... cheetah, I guess, stood up and turned to face us. Definitely not a human, and definitely a talking animal. Green eyes, a mouth, and a body. That's all he had. What the fuck is going on around here? First a skeleton, now a cheetah!)
Taven: "So, you can talk."
???: "Yeah, guessing you guys have never seen a talking cheetah before. That's probably abnormal for the human world."
Deadpool: "I've seen stranger things somehow."
???: "Oh, I should probably introduce myself. 'Sup! Name's Hunter. Nice to meet'cha!"
Taven: "Nice to meet you, too, Hunter. I'm Taven."
Deadpool: "And I'm Deadpool. But if you don't like typing Deadpool in text, Wade works fine as well."
Hunter: "Nice to meet you two. Say, you dudes don't happen to know what's up with this island?"
Deadpool: "Nope. We've legit been searching for answers for like 30 minutes now."
Taven: "I'm guessing you also don't have a clue?"
Hunter: "Nope. Woke up about 15 or 20 minutes ago. Thought I may have been cruising with my friend, Spyro, but I haven't seen him yet on this island."
Taven: "Wade, what was his talent?"
Deadpool: "Oh, uhh, ultimate archer."
Taven: "Archer? You know your way with combat, then, correct?"
Hunter: "Yeah, done all kinds of things with my bow and arrow! Rescued a princess, made her fall in love with me, saved the dragon kingdom... but most of that was Spyro's work."
Deadpool: (So he's a laid-back one, huh? I like 'em. Seems chill.)
Deadpool: (Taven and I said our goodbyes to Hunter, and went into the hospital itself. Inside, there were a first and second floor. On the first floor, rooms for surgeries and patients were adjacent to each other and had no notable features. Just hospital beds and standard surgery stuff. On the second floor, there was a conference room and an on-call room. In the conference room, there was a dark curtain, a projector, and a screen. It was pretty normal for a hospital. Probably where they host their weird little cult meetings. In the on-call room, we have a normal bed, scattered equipment, and an interesting scene.)
???: "Cut the shit, meatbag, I know you're with Bison."
???: "I ain't know shit about this place, okay? For all I know, you might be working with Bison."
???: "Hahaha, please, if I saw him, I'd kill him."
???: "Yeah, and how'd that turn out for you? Oh, right, you betrayed your boss to work with him."
???: "It was just a method of getting closer to him. Besides, I went back to trying to kill him soon after. And how's your life knowing that a Brit kicked your ass? Must reallllllly suck knowing that he took a lot of your fight money."
???: "I'll pulverize ya, bitch!"
???: "Try me!"
Deadpool: (The scene unwinding before Taven and I was an argument between a girl with her hair in drills and purple stripes, and a buff man in a blue colored hood wearing boxing gloves. The girl had a weird spider-symbiote appearance on her top. Wonder if she and Eddie got that connection. The baggy white pants are telling me otherwise, though. The guy is clearly a boxer. The gold chain on his neck, the gold buffalo on his shorts. He has that aura to him that just says "I'm a puncher!".)
Taven: "Everyone, calm down! There's no need for fights."
Deadpool: (The woman and man's attention swapped from themselves to Taven's voice and my body near said voice.)
???: "Huh, seems like we got some visitors."
???: "Hmph, lucky bitch."
???: "And just who the hell are you two?"
Deadpool: (Her intensity increased, as if she was trying to be intimidating. She even put her face closer to ours with a sick, twisted smile.)
Taven: "I am Taven, son of Argus."
Deadpool: "And I'm Wade, but Deadpool's the cooler comic book name."
???: "Huh, so a warrior and a comic nerd wearing superhero gear. Yeah, I've seen this before."
Taven: "And what might your name be?"
???: "My name? Juri. Don't expect me to get all friendly with you geeks."
???: "Guess you want my name, too, huh? Name's Balrog. If you're ever looking for a fight, find me. Gives me more fight money."
Deadpool: "A boxer and a martial artist. Now I believe we're on Shang Tsung's island or some crazy shit."
Taven: "From that argument you two had earlier, I suspect you both know nothing about this island, yet know each other."
Balrog: "Yup. Woke up here about 30 minutes ago."
Juri: "Same here. When I found this idiot, I just knew it had something to do with Bison."
Balrog: "Bison's dead, and besides, I don't work for Shadowloo no more."
Juri: "Yeah, yeah, sure. Load of crap, if ya ask me."
Balrog: "You calling me a liar, bitch?"
Juri: "Have you gotten memory loss or something, dumbass?"
Balrog: "You wanna fight right here?"
Juri: "Bring it!"
Deadpool: (Taven leaned into my ear.)
Taven: "These two clearly know nothing and won't help us, we need to leave."
Deadpool: (We swiftly left the Hospital and passed Hunter in the lobby on our way out. Ooooo the shit storm he's going to have to deal with is crazy. When I finally got outside, Taven was waiting.)
Taven: "Thank god we got out of there."
Deadpool: "No kidding, those two are one happy couple."
Taven: "Anyways, there are 2 locations left, correct?"
Deadpool: "Yup, the castle and military base."
Taven: "Then let's get to them!"
Deadpool: (Taven ran off to the next location, and I quickly chased after him. Seems like this was becoming a routine act of cat and mouse, except the mouse is a demi-god. What a strange story that would make. Someone should write something about it. By the time I reached him, he stood in front of a large castle. It was a typical-looking castle, with a wooden door entrance. Probably can expect some Knights of the Round Table coming out of there soon. Strange why there's a castle here, though. There was also an entrance sign in front of us, with an image of a mouse on it. So I guess it would be Mice of the Round Table... geez, how many times has that pun been used?)
Taven: "So this is the castle. 'Nezumi Castle' as the sign says."
Deadpool: "So thiiiiiiiissssssss is the ancient Nezumi Castle the poems hath spoketh about!"
Taven: "You know about this place?"
Deadpool: "Nope, just practicing my Shakespeare accent. 'To be, or not to be!'"
???: "So you also don't know anything about this place?"
Deadpool: (That voice sounded... normal. I looked to the source, and the source looked... normal. A plaid shirt, jeans, black shoes, normal haircut. Yup, super normal.)
Taven: "No, nothing."
???: "So that makes three of us, huh?"
Deadpool: "Well, 16 including the others- wait, there's still one more after you, ain't there?"
???: "So you've met the others too? Good to know. My name's Steve Mason. I don't know... anything else about me."
Deadpool: "'Ultimate ???'? That's a lot of ?."
Steve: "What do you mean?"
Deadpool: "What, want me to actually type it? Fine. 'Ultimate question mark question mark question mark' question mark-"
Steve: "No, not that. What does that word, 'Ultimate', mean?"
Deadpool: "Oh, apparently we all have these ultimate talent thing-ys, what makes 'em so special, I don't know. Beats the crap outta me."
Steve: "So my talent is unknown, huh? I guess that makes sense. I feel like I'm going through some sort of amnesia or something."
Taven: "I suspect we all could be suffering from this 'amnesia', we all woke up on this island with no recollection of how we got here."
Steve: "Could very well be the case, but my amnesia feels like it's... stronger. Like, I don't know who I am. All I know is my name."
Deadpool: "That strong, huh? Maybe the reality show sickos who put us in this wanted someone to forget their memories."
Steve: "I think that would go too far for a reality show. Anyway, I'm not going to be much help in solving the mystery of this island."
Taven: "Well, at least we found another person here. Oh, I forgot. My name is Taven, and this is Wade."
Deadpool: "Deadpool if you wanna be badass about it."
Steve: "Nice to meet you two. Even if the costume you are wearing is quite strange, it's good to meet people whom I can trust."
Deadpool: (Why I ought to... ignoring the comment, Steve seems normal. Like, the most normal of everyone here. Seems like I can talk to him if I ever want to discuss findings. I got Taven for that, though. And at least Taven doesn't have strong ass amnesia.)
Deadpool: (Taven and I quickly finished investigating the castle and started walking to the last location.)
Taven: "So, there's one more island, and one more person left."
Deadpool: "The military base. That's a strange location to have on an island-oh who the hell am I kidding, that's kinda cliche at this point."
Taven: "Cliche or not, it's still worth investigating. I find it more strange that there's a castle here with no residence."
Deadpool: "True, true. The last person, though, I'm curious about who it could be."
Taven: "If we were to categorize the people we have met, I believe we can trust everyone that isn't Vergil, and the two in the hospital on-call room."
Deadpool: "I ain't particularly fond of Frank either. Always trying to take my damn photos."
Taven: "Mahiru had vital information."
Deadpool: "About this island and the... killing game."
Taven: "That killing game threat dangles over our heads. It's bizarre to think that a killing game could happen, but we need to be prepared for all chances."
Deadpool: "Yeah, probably not gonna happen, but I'm still gonna bet all my savings on it!"
Taven: "*sigh* Claudette seems normal, Wesker and Spinal seem reliable, and Orchid seems... closed off."
Deadpool: "Does seem knowledgeable though, don't count her out."
Taven: "You're right... We've arrived."
Deadpool: (We stopped in front of the military base, which seemed to contain a lot of tanks and weapons. As we entered, we got to see the metal machines up close and personal. Knives, guns, explosives... it was like heaven to me. Tanks and a helicopter, too. Oh my god, it was so beautiful. Amidst this beauty was a girl in a red plaid top that was tied over their chest, a blue hat, a belt that seemed to be hastily put on, and jeans that were tucked into brown boots. Seemed like a standard country girl to me.)
???: "Holy mother of maggot blowing heaven, this would perfect against those damn zombies out there."
Taven: "Excuse me, miss."
???: "Huh?"
Taven: "My friend and I wonder if you have any information about this island?"
???: "Nope. Nada. I don't know what the hell I did to get here."
Taven: "Very well then. All 16 people don't know how they ended up here. Interesting."
???: "So, you guys are the last two, huh? I like the weapons your friend has."
Deadpool: "Who, me? Aw, thanks. But they aren't for sale!"
???: "Don't worry, I'm just complimenting ya. Name's Misty. Ya ever want to kill a zombie, ring me up!"
Deadpool: "Farmgirl? Is that even a talent?"
Misty: "Hey, I may just be some farm girl, but it takes guts to make the undead explode! Besides, how do ya know about that anyways?"
Deadpool: "Oh, apparently we got these ultimate talent titles things that I can see whenever someone introduces themselves to me."
Misty: "'Farmgirl', huh? That's a boring ass title. Give me the 'ultimate badass' or something cool like that."
Deadpool: (I like that style already. She gets it, that title is so boring. Ultimate badass would be so much cooler.)
Taven: "What do you mean by 'it takes guts to make the undead explode!'?"
Misty: "Oh, I've been stuck killing zombies for a while, until I passed out and woke up in this place. Y'all don't know anything about the zombie apocalypse?"
Deadpool: "Welllllll, there was this one time in this one issue... but that was in an issue I just read, wasn't a part of. Weird multiverse rules."
Taven: "I only know of one zombie, not an apocalypse of them."
Misty: "Huh, y'all must be from another timezone or something, then. Can I get your names, strangers?"
Deadpool: "My name's Wade, but Deadpool's way cooler. Wade's just more convenient."
Taven: "My name is Taven, son of Argus."
Misty: "Well, I ain't never heard of this here 'Argus' fellow, but it's nice meeting you two. Y'all look strong and badass!"
Deadpool: "Thank you for recognizing my badassery. Usually, people just ask how I went from X-Men Origins to this. I then tell them 'Wrong universe, dumbass!'"
Misty: "So, y'all have any clue about this place?"
Taven: "Nope, this island is as much of a mystery to us as it is to you."
Misty: "Well, that sucks. All I know is that this military base is cool as shit! All these cool ass guns to kill zombies and shit with!"
Taven: "Are you sure she's the Ultimate Farmgirl?"
Deadpool: "It's what the background said. And the background never lies... from what I know."
Deadpool: (She seems fun. A little abrasive, but she reminds me of a female Wolverine. Except if he was actually fun and not short.)
*Ding dong bing bong*
Taven: "Huh?"
Misty: "The hell was that noise?"
Deadpool: (We quickly focused our attention to the monitor, which had a static background with a shadowy figure on it. Ooooh, how scary if it weren't for the fact that FIGURE WAS A TEDDY BEAR. Scare factor -10!)
???: "Ahem, mic check, one two, one two. Alright, let's get this thing rolling! Now, to everyone on the island, please gather in the lobby of the hotel for the introduction ceremony! I just can't wait! See ya there!"
Deadpool: (The monitor turned off, leaving us to wonder where that light, sinister voice came from.)
Taven: "Meet at the hotel..."
Misty: "Guess everyone else is heading there as we speak. We should probably go to see the commotion."
Taven: "You're right. Besides, Wade and I have investigated all the locations on this island."
Deadpool: "Yup, that's true. But do we realllllly gotta do more running? This shit is exhausting!"
Taven: "This will most likely be our last stop, so you can complain later. For now, we must go to the hotel!"
Deadpool: "Fiiiiinnnnneeee."
Deadpool: (The three of us all ran back to the cottages, where we got to meet a few people on their way to the hotel.)
Steve: "It may just be the amnesia, but I'm getting a bad feeling about this. Like, a really bad feeling."
Mahiru: "This is- This is all too familiar. I-It can't be!"
Hunter: "This is something Ripto would, like, totally do!"
Spinal: "At least we're getting some answers now."
Deadpool: (Once we entered the hotel lobby, we noticed that everyone had gathered, even him.)
Vergil: "..."
Frank: "Hey, uh, Vergil."
Vergil: "What? Did you expect me not to come? Like you all, I also have my questions."
Wesker: "It's just that you seem more hostile. We wouldn't expect you to come here."
Vergil: "Hostility? Then what about those two?"
Balrog: "...You talking about me?"
Vergil: "Not just you."
Juri: "Why'd you gotta rope me in with the meathead?"
Balrog: "Meathead? Ya better shut your mouth before I put fist in your face!"
Vergil: "They are also quite hostile."
Wesker: "That's true, but they seem more... open than you."
Vergil: "Hmph. I don't converse with unworthy scum."
Hunter: "Anyways, where is this teddy bear dude on the monitors? Surely they should be here by now."
Kanade: "Maybe h-he's late."
???: "Negative."
Deadpool: (That same light, sinister voice talked again. We all didn't know from where. Our heads started looking around like some bobble head collection! Until...)
Taven: "Look, by the receptionist desk!"
Deadpool: (We all followed Taven's command, and looked at the receptionist desk, where the source of the voice made its appearance. It belonged to a... black and white teddy bear with a red symbol eye on its left side? So that shadow figure wasn't for show. How friggen stupid!)
???: "I am never late. As I am your headmaster, Monokuma!"
Sam: "...Huh?"
Hunter: "Wow, so it really was a teddy bear!"
Monokuma: "I'm not a teddy bear. I am Monokuma!"
Juri: "You seem like the softest teddy bear there is. How do you intend to scare us?"
Claudette: "She has a point."
Monokuma: "I'm not a teddy bear, don't get me angry now!"
Vergil: "Hmph, this is our kidnapper? Seems like they could only ever harm a marshmallow."
Misty: "I kinda wanna squish him."
Monokuma: "Jeez, stop already, I am not a teddy bear! Let's move on. Now, you all must be wondering why you are here. Well, I got the answers ready to provide if you stop calling me a teddy bear!"
Deadpool: (Monokuma raised its fist and had an angry smile. It seemed like it was trying to be intimidating, but it just made it look more friggen cute!)
Mahiru: "This can't be!"
Monokuma: "Oh, Mahiru, how I can't forget about you. Having a case of twilight syndrome, are we?"
Taven: "Mahiru, you recognize this creature?"
Mahiru: "Y-yes! This thing tried to-"
Monokuma: "Now then, I can't let Miss Koizumi spoil the surprise. Your lives as you once knew them are gone! From now on, you'll be starting your new tropical life on this island!"
Hunter: "Wait, what do you mean by that?"
Monokuma: "By what?"
Hunter: "By 'you'll be starting your new tropical life on this island!' You expect us to live here?"
Monokuma: "Yup!"
Deadpool: "Wait, so you kidnapped me- I mean, us, just so we could live on this weirdo island?"
Monokuma: "Yup!'
Wesker: "So you must be the owner of this island-"
Orchid: "Something is coming."
Deadpool: (Orchid's sudden statement shook everyone and grasped our attention.)
Monokuma: "Wha-wha-what? How did'cha already know about my plan?"
Orchid: "I can hear it."
Deadpool: (We took a few seconds to air out the lobby with silence. We then started listening for what Orchid was talking about.)
Sam: "She's right, I hear it too."
Balrog: "It sounds like a jet or something."
Spinal: "Maybe it's a falling ship."
Kanade: "I don't think those exist."
Vergil: "A storm would be the most likely explanation."
Misty: "But it sounds like it's fallin' down."
Hunter: "Yeah, she's right! It sounds like it's-"
*CRASH*
Deadpool: (The lobby's glass doors didn't break, but they filled with dust, making it nearly impossible to see what landed right outside the door.)
Monokuma: "What the! This wasn't planned!"
Hunter: "-whatever the heck that was."
Steve: "What the hell is going on here! Did a jet or whatever that was crash land right outside the lobby?!"
Orchid: "Only one way to find out."
Deadpool: (Orchid rushed outside, and so did the others. Even Monokuma. When we made it outside, we saw the source of the sound.)
Sam: "Is that a... meteorite?"
Deadpool: (A brown meteorite that had seemingly crashed landed right outside the hotel, and left a crater in the process. Pretty friggen epic! Something finally interesting.)
Frank: "What the hell are the chances of a meteorite landing here? It's perfect for my scoop on this place!"
Wesker: "Is this really an appropriate time to be taking photos?"
Frank: "Hey, it's never the wrong time to get a scoop!"
Claudette: "Look! The meteorite has a... door?"
Deadpool: (Claudette slowly and nervously walked up to the meteorite. Takes some major guts considering it's Claudette. I mean, I could do it without being injured, and I still would cower out! Once Claudette had reached the meteorite, she crouched down, bending on her knees. She pinched the door and opened it.)
Juri: "C'mon, what is it?"
Claudette: "It's an... egg."
Hunter: "Egg? Like, dragon egg?"
Balrog: "If it was a dragon egg, why'd it come from space, dumbass!"
Frank: "Wait, so it's an alien egg?"
Juri: "Obviously. What did'cha think it was, camera man?"
Frank: "Well, whatever it is, something is seriously going on here."
Vergil: "Switching your demeanor, it seems."
Frank: "Hey, I may be taking photos, but I'm also respectful."
Mahiru: "S-shut up! We need to focus on the egg, not that!"
Deadpool: (When Mahiru said that, a faint cracking could be heard coming from the egg. It was... hatching. This ain't looking good.)
Claudette: "It's hatching!"
Wesker: "Already? Without any previous cracks?"
Kanade: "I-I'm scared!"
Steve: "This can't be... This can't be real!"
Deadpool: (Soon enough, the egg fully cracked open, and revealed a... black and white alien? Could it be related to Monokuma? It started moving around, which made a strange cracking sound. Whatever egg juice was in there must've been sticky to make that noise.)
???: "...Finally, I made it."
Deadpool: (It had a strange alien-like voice. Wait, that's not strange at all for an alien! It sounded... off. Like the whole "greetings, earthlings" voice. Light but not Monokuma levels of light, and it had a weird distortion to it. It was a different sort of sinister. The unknown sort. It got up from the shell, then left the meteorite, then left the crater.)
???: "So this is where you humans have been waiting for my arrival."
Monokuma: "Your arrival?! They were waiting for my arrival! And just who the hell are you!"
???: "...So this is the clone that was mentioned? How interesting. Shut up, I will reveal that in due time."
Monokuma: "Shut up? Who you telling to shut up? You should shut up! For I am headmaster-"
Deadpool: (Suddenly, the alien creature, which was of the same height as Monokuma, lifted the bear telekinetically. It raised its left hand too. Some real alien shit. Looking at them closely made me realize that their left eye symbol is also the same as Monokuma's. It's like they're related, but the alien called the bear a clone. What the fuck in sci-fi's name is this?)
Monokuma: "Hey! J-Just what in the hell are you doing?"
???: "You are worth nothing to my game. Your annoyance has been getting on my nerves, bear. And for that, your life it will cost."
Monokuma: "What the! You can't possibly do tha-"
Deadpool: (Suddenly, the alien lifted its right hand, and put it adjacent to the left. It then, slowly, started moving them further away from each other. It was like a weird hand torture.)
Monokuma: "What the hell are you- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Deadpool: (Monokuma started screaming its ass off. I get it now. The alien was splitting apart the bear's body. It was a weird torture, but it made everyone nervous for their own life. That was until it ended with a final-)
*SPLATTER*
Deadpool: (HOLY SHIT MONOKUMA'S GUTS WENT ALL OVER THE PLACE! Black, oil-like blood splattering everywhere, the head fell right in front of us! It was sick- I mean disturbing!)
Steve: "What the... WHAT THE FUCK!??!"
Misty: "HOLY SHIT! Talk about some action!"
Hunter: "What the hell did you do!"
Mahiru: "This is... This isn't possible!"
???: "Oh, but it is. Lucky for you, you are all my test subjects, and I shall care for you."
Deadpool: (All we could focus on was the absolute power move and balls on this alien fella. That was cool as hell!)
???: "Now, for the introduction. My name is Elm, your real headmaster of this trip. Now, that bear was a simple accident in my plans. He was meant to be disposed of a while ago, but my arrival on this island was delayed by some planetary traffic."
Mahiru: "B-B-But Monokuma couldn't... when..."
Elm: "I'm guessing you are referring to the realm you were in, correct?"
Deadpool: (Mahiru nodded her head, but her expression and composition showed that she was scared and nervous. I mean, who wouldn't? This Elm fella just killed a friggen robot!)
Elm: "That realm has secrets you don't know about. This is not your realm, however. It is none of yours. It's just based on a collection of some of yours."
Frank: "What the hell do you mean by that?"
Elm: "You'll find out in due time... Back to the matter at hand, your new life begins now. All of you must live on this island for the foreseeable future."
Kanade: "For the foreseeable future?!"
Elm: "Yes. I could go on for way too long about the rules and whatnot, but I'd rather just get to the good part. You are all my subjects."
Wesker: "Subjects?"
Elm: "Yes, subjects. Subjects for a killing game!"
Deadpool: (Holy shit, Mahiru was right!)
Taven: "So it was for a killing game."
Elm: "Miss Koizumi is probably experiencing some major deja vu. She was in this scenario after all. 16 subjects, forced into a killing game."
Vergil: "Just to clarify, what is your definition of 'killing game'?"
Elm: "Well, it's simple. You could all live the rest of your lives on this island, like I have said, or you have a method of escape. To leave this island, you must murder another living being here amongst the 16 of you. Whatever method it is, asphyxiation, drowning, burning, stabbing... it means you have a way out."
Sam: "So you're telling us to murder each other just to get out? Are you insane!"
Elm: "Maybe, subject, but there are a few rules. You can check those out in these."
Deadpool: (Elm lifted his right hand again, and these digital tablets came out of the meteorite. How much shit can that meteorite hold? Maybe one of Strange's tricks. Or, it could be from Dormammu or Shuma's dimensions.)
Elm: "These are your e-handbooks. They display information about you all. Your name, your height, your weight, your ultimate talent, and because you're from different realms, your powers, if you have any. I took special care of them, and I ask that you do the same. It's a pain in the ass to get these manufactured, so please, take care of it."
Deadpool: (He then launched the e-handbooks at us. It wasn't fast, and they all separated quite neatly. Pretty cool, honestly. Wish I could have some of his powers. I looked at the one he handed me by turning it on. I mean, how else would I look at it? It briefly flashed blue, before it displayed words.)
*Welcome, Deadpool, the Ultimate Mercenary*
Deadpool: "Of course, it was Ultimate Mercenary. Man, that's such a generically cool talent. Why couldn't it be cool, cool!"
Orchid: "How can you still be this talkative and joking in all of this chaos?"
Deadpool: "It's my charm, sweetheart."
Elm: "Now that the handbooks have been handed out, I would like to say that they contain the rules. Now, I usually don't want to go over the rules, but there are two I cannot ignore. One: Violence against Headmaster Elm is prohibited. Unless any of you want to join Monokuma in his fate, I would suggest not violating that rule. Two: If you commit a murder and 3 or more people find the body, an investigation period will begin. After that time passes, a class trial will occur. In this class trial, you will have to provide evidence you found during your investigation period to prove who the culprit is. You shall all pick a culprit via majority vote. If you successfully find the culprit with a vote, they alone shall receive punishment. But if the wrong person is deemed as the culprit, everyone besides the culprit shall receive punishment."
Steve: "Y-you say punishment. What do you mean by that?"
Elm: "Execution."
Steve: "Exe...cution...!"
Elm: "Yup. It wouldn't be cool to just let the culprit off with a slap on the wrist. They will be treated like how most murderers are treated, Shhshhshhshh!"
Balrog: "Hey, what makes ya think you're getting away with this, asshole?"
Frank: "Y-yeah, there surely has to be someone coming for us about now."
Elm: "Please. Whatever comes to save you, I can destroy. It's as simple as that. Now, in terms of getting you to play along with our little game... you'll find out, shhshshshhshh."
Deadpool: (With that alien-like laugh, Elm had left the scene. It was an exit, leaving us with questions, thoughts, and darkness surrounding us... Literally, it was nighttime out. I'm so tired, man. 11k words? How long does a prologue have to be?)
Frank: "What the- What the hell was all that about?"
Hunter: "I-... I seriously don't know, dude."
Wesker: "Seems like we've been given updates about our hostage situation."
Misty: "Yeah, a shitty ass update!"
Sam: "Something weird is going on around here."
Kanade: "It's scary!"
Taven: "Hey, Mahiru, are you okay?"
Deadpool: (Mahiru was still shaken from the entire event. As Elm said, she must be having a case of deja vu.)
Mahiru: "Y-yeah, I'm-"
Vergil: "Leave her be."
Taven: "What?"
Deadpool: (Vergil was somehow sounding more sinister than Elm, as if it were some sort of sinisterism competition.)
Vergil: "She's weak. And in this game we're about to play, the weak shall fall."
Taven: "What are you saying? Do you hear yourself right now? We can't fall to this speech of evil."
Vergil: "Oh, I hear clearly, just as I hear that we're in a killing game. 16 strangers; some know each other, some don't. There's no one you can trust. And when people see you shaken... They take advantage for their survival. For their escape"
Taven: "..."
Deadpool: (Everyone went silent. What Vergil said wasn't some sort of trick or brainwashed speech. It was the cold hard truth.)
Juri: "Ya know... he's right. I don't know any of you idiots, what says I won't kill ya?"
Wesker: "It's... an unfortunate truth."
Orchid: "To escape, someone must kill."
Spinal: "And with those rules in place..."
Deadpool: "What prevents anyone from killing..."
Deadpool: (Everyone started looking around at each other. 16 subjects forced into a killing game of survival. There's no way we can trust each other, right? Just another shitty situation my ass has found itself in. I may not be able to die, but that escape is looking real nice. But that punishment... what if it could be the cure... A deadly cure... No, what the hell am I saying? What the hell am I doing? I won't kill here! I won't fall for this killing game! I swear I won't fall for this darkness!)
PROLOGUE: Eyes Opening New Dark Doors: END
SURVIVING SUBJECTS: 16