Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

RIO

It only takes a few seconds for a whole world to collapse. 

It only takes a few seconds for everything to change from better to something worse. For a smile to disappear and for a heart to skip a beat in the chest.

When she woke up in the morning, Rio never thought her life would change like it did. She never thought all it would take was an innocent smile and eye contact for her hopes and life to collapse around her. 

The hope of finally having someone to present to her parents, to finally see them smile after months and years of not being able to. The hope of no longer living in constant secrets, of hiding a part of her to the people she deeply cared about. She thought any Gods who were up there, looking at her, were finally doing something good to her, making her life great, but they didn’t. All they did was to make her idealize any good that was happening in her life before crashing it all to nothing more than hurt. 

And it did hurt to be used like she had been.

It did hurt for a while. 

Rio never really liked being trapped in a place full of people. Somewhere where her own personal space mixed with others. Somewhere where she could feel people’s breath against the back of her neck. Somewhere where she could hardly move or even just breathe. But she had no other choice but to be at places like that, to take public transports to move around the city. She didn’t have enough for a car and she had to sell her motorcycle so she could pay her rent and have something to eat at the end of the month. It had been the hardest decision she had to make. 

That’s why every morning she ended up in the metro, merging a little too much with strangers and the music coming from her headphones wasn’t even enough to calm her down. To calm her heart from beating a little too fast in her chest and from her hands to stop trembling. Her fingers tapping on the metal didn’t do much either while Rio felt like the drive was much longer than usual. It wasn’t longer, never had been. But today she woke up with a feeling she couldn’t quite name. The fact of being trapped underground, in a metro full of people already sweating too much at 9 in the morning, wasn’t helping her to feel better. 

Even her, who used to go to the gym before working and dancing all day long, never was in a state like those strangers when she was taking the bus or in the metro. She liked to think she had some manners and respect for people who were riding with her when most of them tend to be selfish and self centered. 

That’s why she was the only one of her train to move when her eyes catched a woman running to them, almost out of breath, arms full, trying to catch the metro before it was too late and she had to wait for the next one. Rio could see in her eyes the hope of catching that metro lingering in her eyes, like it was this one or nothing. So, with her hand, Rio stopped the doors from closing in front of the woman’s face who finally was able to step in the train a few seconds before it was ready to go. 

Trying to catch her breath after her little run, the young woman thanked Rio with a smile before both of them got surprised by the departure of the metro they seemed to have forgotten. Swaying slightly between the people, Rio was the first to recover, grabbing the subway pole with one hand and the young woman’s arm with the other, preventing her from falling in the middle of their train. 

“Sorry … and thanks.” 

Rio barely heard her with her headphones on, still playing some Taylor Swift’s song in her ears, but she did catch the intention of her words by her eyes and her lips moving. She granted her with a small nod and a smile before releasing her so she could find a place to wait in the train. And if Rio was expecting to see her go a little further in the train, the young woman chose to stay next to her, grabbing the pole so her hand was just under hers. 

They stayed like that during the whole ride, watching the underground by the window in front of them or people leaving and coming in at every stop. Every now and then, Rio dared to turn her eyes to look at the young woman beside her, to eye her posture, straight and inflexible, like she had a stick up her ass -she had to bite back a laugh at that thought so she wouldn’t pass for a weirdo-. She had multiple things in her arms, her purse, another bag that looked like a gym bag and she was holding a box at arm’s length, as if she had taken the time to stop by a pastry shop this morning before heading for the metro. 

Who was stopping by a pasty shop before 9 am like that ? And who dared to take the metro with probably a fragile cake in their arms ? That girl apparently. Rio couldn’t help herself but was judging her for a long minute before looking at someone else. She couldn’t be caught looking at her while biting her lips or the inside of her cheek to stop her from laughing or smiling too big. Rio didn’t know her, but the last thing she wanted that woman to remember about her was that she had been rude to her.

So instead of that woman, her eyes turned to look at a couple sitting in front of them. They were holding hands while the man was whispering something at his girlfriend who had a smile as big as her face before kissing her a little too hard for a public space. And Rio could almost feel the bile coming up her throat as she was making a face of disgust before looking away, again. 

Watching that man’s tongue cleaning his girlfriend’s mouth was too much for that time of the day, or for any time of the day for that matter. Rio wasn’t comfortable with PDA, never had been. Even with her boyfriend, she was with for a year now, she never really wanted to show more than necessary in public. Neither did he. They were pretty different over some things, but not on that and Rio was glad to be understood and not to have to explain herself every time he would want to kiss her on the street. Or like that couple, in front of everyone in the metro early in the morning. 

The only time Rio would show more than necessary, would be with her dance partner during her class lessons or competitions -even if the latter happened less and less lately-. They had been dancing together for a long time now and it was part of the show she was highly glad to do. For her, it was different than PDA with her lover. It was more classy, more sensual and respectable than eating her lover’s mouth in front of everyone’s eyes. 

No, Rio was clearly not head over heels for PDA. 

In the year she was with her boyfriend, the best they did in public was holding their hands like high scholars or holding his arms the few times they were out on a date and sometimes a brief kiss on their lips. But in general, they were a pretty discrete couple. A few people around them knew about their relationship, especially friends or coworkers. Rio hadn’t told her parents yet. She was waiting for the perfect time to tell them, not that she was worried they wouldn’t love him -they would love him. Seren seemed to have everything her parents would want to see in her partner. She was just waiting until it was serious enough before thinking about presenting them. 

A year, twelve months, fifty-two weeks, three hundred sixty-five days. They had celebrated their one year anniversary a few days ago and since, Rio had thought about telling her parents, planning a dinner so Seren could at least meet her father who would talk to her mom after. She hadn’t planned anything yet, and wanted to talk about it to him first. Maybe around take out with a movie playing in the background at one of their places.

Rio wanted to do things right. She was thirty-two and hadn’t had an enough serious relationship so she could present someone to her parents since maybe high school when she had her first boyfriend. She had a few relationships -months or weeks of dating- but nothing serious before her mom got sick. After that, dating wasn’t Rio’s top priority. Relationships became one night stands. Rio was only a mirage in people’s life -men or women sometimes-, until she met Seren.

She never thought it would last long between them, but she got surprised when Seren stuck around, kept flirting with her at any occasions or when he waited for her to finish her dance lessons at the end of the day. He made his point, knew how to seduce her so she would think about giving him a chance. 

She did and here they were a year later.

Still together with Rio changing her route to work so she could stop by surprise at his place before the day started. She wanted to see him after he told her that he was feeling sick two days ago. By chance, she didn’t have to be at work before eleven for her first class and hadn’t any dance training before to be at. So she took all the strength she had and ended up in the metro with the morning rush of people when she didn’t need to.

I hope he won’t be hard asleep.

It’s something that had happened one time when she wanted to surprise him. She ended up waiting almost half an hour at his door, knocking and trying to call him on his phone but nothing. Seren was still asleep, his phone probably dead or with the no disturbing mode on. He never woke up and Rio had to leave before one of his neighbors started thinking about calling the cops because they thought she was one of these crazy ex-girlfriends they used to see on television or whatever.  

So, with one last smile to the woman she helped earlier, who smiled back at her back, Rio left the train when they arrived at Seren’s stop a few blocks from his apartment. With Don’t Blame Me of Taylor Swift playing in her ears, she climbed the stairs with a strange feeling in her chest. The same one she felt since she woke up but decided to just ignore it. Maybe it was nothing like it happened sometimes. Maybe it was just the strange weather of the day, the sun rising slowly in the sky while something in the air just smelled like rain or thunder. 

But the more she climbed the stairs, the more she felt uneasy, like she was claustrophobic in her own body but with air around her and sky above her head. Music was the best way to shut it down a little, to keep her mind busy and to keep her from overthinking everything that was happening today. That strange feeling ? Something will definitely happen today. The young woman running late for the metro ? If she thought about it enough, she could find something about it too. 

Call her crazy, but Rio was sure something would happen today, but she didn’t know when or how. So she kept walking in the street, letting Taylor’s voice sing for her, like she was at a private concert. Her eyes wandered everywhere around her. She looked at men and women walking around her, minding their own stuff, going to work for some or going for a run for others. So many lives that crossed the same path and were not meant to know each other. Not ever or not yet.  

And in those people she wasn’t meant to meet yet, Rio recognized one face in the middle of everyone. Brown hair wavy on the shoulders, a body that looked like they were floating while walking, arms full of bags and blue eyes glowing with the light of the sun. The woman from the metro was walking beside her. She didn’t realize they were following each other until now. Until their eyes met and they smiled at each other one last time. 

At the moment, Rio found it funny to see they were heading the same road since their path crossed in the metro. Since she helped the woman get on her train when she looked like she was late, running down the stairs. All it took was a few seconds for them to have their path crossed. A few more times and they would never have met. 

If she could say they had really met. 

Yet.

The walk to Seren’s apartment was only a fifteen minutes walk and in those minutes, Rio was walking a few steps ahead of the young woman.  She could hear her heels clacking on the sidewalk despite the cars driving next to them on the road. She was that close to offering her some help with the bags and the bakery box the young woman was holding in her arms, but the fact that there was a high chance they were not heading to the same place was stopping her from being altruist with her. Rio was two minutes away from Seren’s apartment, helping her now wouldn’t do much at this point. 

And so she kept walking until she stopped at her boyfriend’s building right on time when Taylor Swift’s voice faded in her ears as she came to the end of her album. She called Seren on the intercom, hoping he wasn’t still asleep and she wouldn’t have to wait too long.

“Ooh you’re stopping here too ?” Rio heard a voice coming from behind her and here she was, the young woman from the metro still beside her with her arms full and a small smile on her face, barely visible but still here. 

“Yeah, I’m here to see my boyfriend.” she gave her the same smile, a slight curve of her lips before calling Seren on the intercom for the second time. “If I knew, I would have helped you with your bags.”

“Me too …” Rio could see she was going to say something more but she was interrupted by an interference coming from the intercom followed by a man’s voice. Seren’s voice.

“Who is it ?” 

“It’s me Rio, open up.” / “Hi baby, it’s me.” They started saying at the same time before looking at each other, words dying on their lips. 

What the fuck ? Was all Rio could think about while staring at the woman who stared at her back. Did the young woman, she didn’t know what her name was, answer to her boyfriend by calling him baby ?

“Come up inside, hurry up !” 

It was all they could hear before the sound of the door opening clicked behind them. Like an automatic, Rio grabbed the handle to keep the door open while she couldn’t look away from the woman in front of her.

“Did you call him baby or did I misheard  what you said to my boyfriend ?” 

“What do you mean your boyfriend ? It was my boyfriend who answered the call.” If a look could kill, Rio was sure she would be already bleeding dead by the way the woman was looking at her. “Why did you call my boyfriend by the way ? Who are you ?”

“You gotta be kidding me.” Rio was losing her patience with that girl claiming Seren was her boyfriend. She didn’t have time for this. “Who am I ? I’m his girlfriend, so who are you ?”

“ I am his girlfriend.”

Rio really didn’t like how and where it was going. Seren was her boyfriend for the past year, they just celebrated their anniversary a few days ago, so why was that girl claiming to be his girlfriend. She was trying her best to stay calm, but she could feel the anger growing and growing inside her. 

“How long ?”

“Eight months, you ?” that woman’s tone was working on Rio, pissing her off the more she talked. She was close to being condescending to her, looking her up and down like she was judging her.

And by the look on her face, it seemed like she had enough to judge her. Rio was dressed in one of her favorite outfits. A white tank top with a green open shirt, short sleeves that was showing the flower tattoo she got on her arm, with jeans where she attached her carabiner with her keys. The top of her boxer was only slightly showing. Her hair was short, but she had managed to pull it into a messy ponytail from which her bangs escaped to frame her face perfectly. Rio was happy to be as confident about herself as she was, because without it, she knew she could have felt bad about herself just by the look the other woman was giving her.

“It’s been a year.” she was holding back to calling her a mistress or something like it, knowing it wouldn’t do much. That woman wasn’t the one in the wrong, even if she was currently pissed at her. Maybe it was just a misunderstanding and one of them didn’t recognize their boyfriend’s voice like they’re sure they did. Maybe there was another young man like Seren in this building who was that woman’s boyfriend.

“Liar, I would know if Seren was dating someone when we started dating.” no another man, no misunderstanding. They were dating the same guy at the same time. 

“I’m not, we celebrated our one year anniversary last week.” Rio didn’t like the situation she was currently in and looking at the other woman in the street, with Seren still in his apartment, was really pissing her off. “Damn it, Seren.” and just like that, Rio stepped inside the building, throwing the door open so the woman could follow her if she wanted.

She climbed the stairs two by two, feeling the anger growing inside her the closer she got to Seren’s apartment. She could hear the sound of heels behind her, so the young woman she still didn’t know the name -not that she cared right now- was following her. Her hands were shaking when she finally reached the apartment’s door, her fist coming down hard on it, urging Seren to come quickly opening to her.

“ Hey bab … Rio ?” his eyes went bigger when he first saw Rio when opening the door and she could tell by how he looked that he was perfectly fine. So he lied to her when he said he was really sick. “I wasn’t expecting you to come today baby, what are you doing here ? Don’t you have lessons to give or dance training ?” he corrected himself immediately by calling her baby like he used to do after they started dating. A pet named Rio never really liked it, but she let him use it because he always forgot she didn’t like it. 

Now she understood why.

There was a buzzing in Rio’s ear making her barely aware of the sound of heels coming to a stop behind her. All she could focus on was the look between shock, surprise and terror on her boyfriend's face.

“Yeah, didn't want me to know about your second girlfriend ?” her hands fisted on her sides when she stepped inside his apartment, forcing her way inside by pushing him away. “Dare to explain what’s happening ?”

“What second girlfriend ? What are you talking about baby ?” and he dared to laugh at her, a fake laugh she could tell was costing him a lot to make it sound real. He failed miserably. The worst part was the presence of said girlfriend he didn’t realize was there too and who was still in the hallway, looking at them. At him specifically with daggers in her eyes. 

“She’s talking about me ! Your girlfriend.” her voice was so full of poison that Seren just froze in his place, not daring to look her way. “Are you really dating her ? Is that a joke or something ?” 

Her and her condescending voice, Rio would want to give her a taste of something like her hand or her fist. But right now, even if that woman was insufferable, she wasn’t her direct enemy. Seren was. He was both of their enemies and Rio was thinking they could team up to get the truth they deserved. They were both his victims after all.

“Agatha … You’re here too.” he tried to give her a smile, but it looked a lot more like a grimace or something.

So Agatha was her name. 

Such a pretty name for someone condescending like her. What a shame. Was all Rio could think about during the two seconds she got after Seren’s last words.

“Yeah yeah, we’re both here Seren, now talk. What’s the fuck ?” Rio was losing all her patience and she was a very patient person, but her boyfriend always got in the habit of testing her limits. Right now, he was above every limit she could have. They needed answers. She needed answers to why the fuck another girl was pretending -no saying- to be his girlfriend. After a year of dating, after she started to think about presenting him to her family, the exact reason for her presence this morning. After everything, she needed to know the truth.

“Listen baby, it’s not what you thi…”

“Stop with that bullshit Seren. ‘Baby it’s not what you think’ , my ass. It’s time to tell us the truth.” she cut him already knowing how the end would go. She dared to look at the other girl, Agatha, still standing by the door now closed -she didn’t realize until now, probably that girl who closed it after making her presence known to their boyfriend-, she was silent, only looking at Seren with the darkest eyes Rio had seen in her life. The one she was at the receiving end earlier was nothing compared to this one.

If she was keeping quiet, then Rio would be the only one doing the speaking. “You told me you were feeling sick, but when I look at you, you seem pretty fine to me. When I thought about making you a surprise by coming to see you before I leave for work, imagine my surprise when I met another girl who says she’s your girlfriend for … How long did you say it was ? Seven months ? Nine months ?” and she looked at Agatha waiting for her to answer even if Rio did remember what she said to her. But that Agatha girl didn’t dare to look at her or give her an answer. She kept looking at Seren like she wanted to kill him but was holding back herself by gripping harder the bakery box in her hands. 

“Ooh yeah, eight months ! Fuck Seren, you’ve been dating her for eight months when last week we went on a date to celebrate our year together. One year ! What’s the fuck Seren ?”

“Look Rio, baby …”

“Stop calling me baby !”

“Right okey. Look, it really is not what you think it is. It’s complicated, but it means nothing ..”

“I mean nothing to you ? That’s really what you’re going to say ?” the new voice rising made Rio jump of surprise. 

Agatha’s voice now was so cold and full of poison Rio could almost feel bad for Seren. Almost. Only if she wasn’t that mad to him or angry and sad to be only a part of his double life.

“Eight months together and you dare to say in front of me that I meant nothing to you ? What kind of bastard are you for saying stuff like that, huh ? You really don’t care about other, all that’s matter is you, you and fucking only you. You really should start dating your own selfish self.” 

If Rio was mad, Agatha was enraged, fuming with rage and everything she could have against him. She didn’t know if she was glad she finally started talking or if she preferred her being silent like she was until Seren screwed everything up by talking without thinking. 

“No, no Agatha, it's not what I meant ! You’re not nothing to me …” 

“Shut up Seren and tell us the truth. You’re just making everything worse to you right now.” with the look in Agatha’s eyes, she knew he wouldn’t be alive for long if he kept talking without thinking. “Were you really dating both of us at the same time ? Why ?” Rio couldn’t understand herself right now. Helping, in some way, Seren to not getting killed by Agatha’s hand was not on her bingo cards in this situation. Ending up in this situation was not in her bingo cards. “Just say something damn it. You can’t do something disgusting like that and not explain yourself to us. Fuck Seren … A year it’s not anything, eight months either.”

But Seren kept his mouth shut, only looking at his feet he could almost look like he was sorry, but Rio knew better from him. In those twelve months of dating, she started to recognize every twitch of his mouth and what it really meant. Seren was a good liar, she knew that, but she never expected him to lie and do something like dating two people at the same time.

Who was she trying to convince ? Maybe herself so she won’t lose her mind once she would be out of this apartment. With her boyfriend’s silence, Rio got enough time to realize some of his weird behavior she never really dared to question before. But now, with the truth being revealed to her, every dot started to connect together. 

There was every time she took a picture of them and he asked her not to post it on social media, and the only time he agreed to was when she almost forced him but had to accept to not tag him in the publication. Like that, his second girlfriend, Agatha, wouldn’t see it and his secret was safe. She never had met his family -not that he had met hers too- or many of his friends or to know his colleagues better. He had told her it wouldn’t look professional for her to come say hi to his office knowing she had given them dance lessons during an ice breaking event his boss had organized with her dance association last year. Maybe Agatha had come to his office so showing up there would have been weird for his colleague and maybe would have raised suspicions in her mind. 

Every strange behavior Seren had during their year of dating started to make sense to Rio. Everything was falling into their right place. The reality had been right in front of her eyes and she had never gotten suspicious of anything. Her blindness was what made her feel sad and bad, maybe more than the cheating and the all double life thing. 

“Damn … You really are an asshole after all.” the reality started to fall on Rio’s shoulders, she could feel the weight of everything on her now and she wasn’t feeling great about it. “Were you going to say something one day ? Or were you going to keep your lie going as long as you could ?” now, it was her voice that was full of poison, but despite Agatha’s, hers wasn’t meant to kill. Only to hurt. Her or him ? She didn't know.

“Rio, look …”

“And you ? I know what he told me this week, why I haven't seen him in days and why I’m here today, so why are you here too ? Did he tell you he was sick ? Did he tell you the same lie he told me ?” Rio was purposely ignoring Seren when he took a step forward to get to her, one hand trying to reach her but she just walked away from him, her eyes on Agatha who she was talking to.

“It’s our eight month anniversary and since he was on a work trip last week I wanted to come see him.”

A work trip. 

Last week. 

Seren wasn’t on a work trip last week, they were together, all week. Seren had prepared many things for them to celebrate their anniversary, even going to ask Rio to take a week off from her dance lessons. Which she did.

Lying was something he was used to doing to each of them to be sure to keep his double life a secret. And if he lied to things like that, what were the other things he could have possibly lied about ?

“But from what I heard, I guess he wasn’t on a work trip.” Agatha was the one who brought Rio back from her thoughts. 

“No he wasn’t. He was with me all week in Boston. A trip he planned for our anniversary.” why Boston ? Rio never asked why when Seren told her where they were going. He had everything planned and didn’t want to ruin it.

Agatha simply nodded at her words, her eyes falling to look at the box she still had in her hands. 

“Boston …” was all she said in a quiet voice Rio was scared she might start to cry. “I see, it wasn’t a work trip but a very long date.” and Rio wanted to say something to her, telling her it was okey, that he didn’t deserve her tears but before she could form any words, Agatha was already on Seren, grabbing the cake she took from the box she was holding and smashed the cake on his face. 

The face full of cake, the mouth open wide in shock made Rio want to laugh. She was so wrong when she thought Agatha wanted to cry when she was probably just thinking about what to do with the cake she brought. And what a masterpiece she did with that. It was a picture of Seren she wouldn’t forget any time soon. She was sure of it. 

“Fuck you, don’t talk to me again.” it was the last words Agatha said before she left the apartment, her heels clacking against the wood floor. 

“I’m sorry Rio, I …”

“No you’re not, Seren. If you were, you wouldn’t have done any of that. Never. You’re not sorry, you’re selfish and you deserved it. No, you deserve more than just a cake on your face.”

And then, it was Rio’s turn to leave his apartment, taking her time to slam the door on her way out before almost running outside to see if Agatha was still here. She didn’t know why, but she wanted to see her, see if she was alright after everything they discovered. It wasn’t nothing, it was something big and Rio could understand if Agatha wasn’t feeling great after that. Seren didn’t give them a clear explanation, he didn’t have any, she was sure of it, but it didn’t excuse anything he had done to them. 

Once she reached the bottom of the stairs, her eyes dropped to Agatha who was standing next to the wall, her hands holding her against it, the other on her face like she was hiding her tears. 

“Agatha ..? Are you good ?”

All she had in return was Agatha’s laugh. She laughed at her like she was a maniac, her back still turned to Rio.

“Did you really ask me if I was good after I discovered that my boyfriend was already dating another girl when he was with me ? God, you really are something else too.”

“What’s that supposed to mean ?” Rio could have understood Agatha’s pain or tears, but she couldn’t understand why she was angry at her. “Do I have to remind you that you were the one who dated my boyfriend behind my back ? I’m not the bad person here Agatha, so are you. Seren is, so please direct your anger at him instead of being angry at me.” and Agatha laughed again, the same fake laugh Seren did earlier and Rio was completely lost at her reaction. “Listen, I just wanted to make sure you were okey. Do you need anything ? Do you want to get revenge on him ? We can always slash his tires, trash talk him and expose what he did on the internet. If he was with you the same way he was with me, he wouldn't like it at all.” 

“That’s what’s on your mind ? Getting revenge on him like a high school girl ? What are you ? Twelve ?” 

“I’m thirty two actually, thanks. But no. I do believe getting revenge could help, it could do us some good after what he did. We can make him pay for all his lies and for everything he did to us behind our backs.” it was probably a bad idea, but right now Rio didn’t really care. “Agatha, he lied to both of us, he played us, he cheated on both of us, he …”

“I know what he did, clever girl.” her tone was harsh, meant to hurt. Agatha was angry, not only against Seren, but against everyone, including Rio. “If it wasn’t clear enough, I don’t want to be friends with you just because he dated us at the same time. I’m not that desperate to be all friendly and lovey dovey with you. Now leave me alone, I don’t know you and I want it to stay that way.”

The next second, Agatha was gone without letting time for Rio to answer her, leaving her at the entrance of the building, the door closing slowly on Agatha's silhouette walking away in the street. 

“Damn, who’s that psycho ?” 

Chapter Text

AGATHA

A mistress, by any kind, wasn’t the way Agatha would describe herself in this fucked up situation. She and Seren hadn’t started only eight months ago. Not really. They had met a year before they started dating, almost two years ago, thanks to their parents who have worked together since what felt like forever. Evanora had been talking about him for years, rambling about him and how great he did in college and in the company he worked for. Agatha had heard so many times her mother saying he was a nice man, suitable for a girl coming from a family like theirs. Not for a girl like her, it wasn’t something Evanora would ever say to her own daughter, never. 

Meeting Seren was just a question of good timing, and the perfect timing for her mother was two years ago, during one of her company’s galas -something to look great to the community-. Agatha had just joined the Opera as a dancer so her mother wanted to show her off. To praise the fact that the Opera had finally a Harkness, not Agatha, not her own daughter, but a Harkness. If it could have been Evanora herself, it would have been better, but it was Agatha who had been accepted to dance at the Opera. A small victory, but still something Evanora could use to praise herself. 

They had talked throughout the gala, and Agatha got to know the real Seren, not the one her mother used to paint his portrait when talking about him. She had got to meet the shy man Seren could be, the one who could show modesty over the things he did. The one who wanted to help the people who needed it. The Seren who wanted to do something good in his life.

Well, she thought she had gotten to know the real Seren, but had she really known him in those two years ? 

It had taken her months before giving him a chance, before thinking about dating him. Because, who would say no to someone who had been picture perfect ? That’s how Evanora had presented him. Like the perfect man, the best she could meet in her life. He was the one who would have made her happy, who would have given her a family and married her in some future Evanora had already in mind.

That was everything her mother had put in her mind and Agatha had believed her. Slowly, but surely. She had waited a little, just to try to prove her mother wrong, but in the end, she had fallen for him. She had fallen for the man he showed her he was. But no one knew about it. 

It was still a secret, or kinda. 

Their parents knew they were seeing each other, going on dates, getting to know each other, but that was all. They didn’t know they had started dating eight months ago. Agatha and Seren had agreed on waiting before telling them because they knew once the news would be out, they wouldn’t have peace. It wouldn’t be just them two. It would be them four. Evanora, Seren’s dad, Seren and Agatha.

Agatha knew the moment her mother would be aware of their relationship she would start talking about marriage and grandchildren, urging her daughter to get pregnant before being too old for that. And by being too old she meant thirty years old, when Agatha was only twenty-eight. She knew there would have been pressure on her shoulders and maybe on Seren’s too. So she was fine with the secret, she preferred it that way.

But now her eyes had met those of that girl, that another girlfriend Seren had. Now that a whole new reality has been opened to her, she started doubting everything. 

Had she known the real Seren in those two years ? Did the one she got to know was even a real part of him ? Did the ambition he told her about was even real ? Did he even want to do good for the people in this country ? 

A good man, like she thought Seren was, wouldn't have done something like dating two women at the same time. Or was it something common in this society ? Having a partner and a mistress at the same time, without them knowing about each other ? Probably yes, but it didn’t make it more acceptable or anything. No. Agatha was furious, she had wanted to commit murder since she first stepped foot in Seren’s apartment this morning. Throwing cake at his face was everything she could do without being charged or being disinherited by her mother. But the desire to hurt him or to kill him by her own hands was still here.

Maybe the idea of getting revenge from that woman wasn’t as bad as it sounded, but her ideas of how to get their revenge was really bad. Worthy of a child who wanted to get revenge on another kid who would have eaten their afternoon snack. Nothing worth a woman in her thirties like she said she was. 

Her existence made her angry. Agatha couldn’t believe Seren was dating her while trying to get in her pants -which he, unfortunately, did-. They had nothing in common, even their style in clothes were different. When Agatha had shown up in a white and purple floral and flowy dress that perfectly accentuated her waist, giving the impression that she was floating on her heels. The straps and collar of the dress fitted the curves of her chest, making it look bigger than it actually was. She looked flawless in her dress, she felt feminine, beautiful, stunning and knew Seren would have loved her outfit any other day. He always loved when she was in a dress, told her multiple times that he liked when women were in dress -but she was the most beautiful he had ever seen-. But Rio didn’t look like the type of woman to wear a dress on a regular day, or on any other day, not with the clothes she wore that morning with her shirt and tank top, her carabiner on her jeans and was her underwear really visible like that or Agatha had dreamt that ? She looked more like the type of woman to wear a suit to go out and to dress in a more masculine and androgynous way. 

Rio didn’t look like the type of woman Seren seemed to like and be attracted to. They were miles apart from each other that Agatha couldn’t understand what Seren had found in that girl, Rio, who looked more like a lesbian by the way she dressed or even stood, than a straight woman, or even a bisexual woman. If that was still a thing. Hadn’t being bisexual become old fashioned by now ? 

Agatha wouldn’t be surprised if Rio did have a bike or something to make her look more like a lesbian she’s sure she truly is. Maybe a closeted lesbian ? But surely not a straight woman and the more she thought about her, about what happened that morning, the more she was sure of it. 

Sitting behind the counter of the shop where she worked when she’s not dancing for the company, Agatha was scrolling on Instagram, going post after post of some boring stuff the algorithm put on her feed. Some travel ideas from a random girl who thought was an influencer, videos of cats that were meant to be funny -Agatha did laugh at some of their cute faces-, some book recommendations from people she did follow, news from dancers she followed too or from acquaintances from college or dance companies. Nothing really fully interesting, but enough to keep her busy when they didn’t have any customers in the shop. 

It was a pretty calm day, leaving Agatha with enough time to spiral with the events of the morning. Leaving her wondering about Seren and Rio, what couple they were, what Seren had found attractive in her, who was Rio, what she did, how the two had met. Curiosity got the better of her that Agatha ended up on Seren’s instagram, going through his followers in the hope to find Rio in his three hundred following. She had never realized he had that many followers on social media, but thankfully, she did find her after a few scrolls.

@evilgreenhag , how creative of her. 

Agatha clicked on her profile and started scrolling through her posts. Pictures of different kinds of plants and flowers,  pictures of her with other girls, probably friends of hers, videos of her dancing, sometimes alone what she could figure was modern jazz, or sometimes dancing tango with a man. Two genres of dance Agatha never could imagine her doing. She didn’t have the style for those and could more easily see her doing breakdance or any dance in the same spirit. Or no dance at all.

Maybe Seren had a style for women after all. They were both dancers, different since Agatha was a classical dancer and Rio was more into tango, hip hop and modern jazz -couldn't she choose only one ? Why did she have to dance so many different dances ?

And in the middle of everything there was just one time Seren did appear on her instagram feed. One time more than her since she couldn’t post any picture of them both, too scared that their parents would figure out that they were, in fact, dating, and because Seren didn’t want to post something too personal on social media. His instagram was almost empty and for the little post he did make, it was some picture full of men during his seminar or travels with his friends. A typical man account. 

So Agatha had never been able to post something of them both in their eight months of relationship, but Rio had been able to do one. Looking at the date, she saw it was posted two months ago, a little after New Years Eve but Agatha could see the pictures had been taken that exact night from the fireworks in the background. 

Seren had lied to her, telling her he had to go on a trip to Los Angeles with friends from work, leaving Agatha all alone during one of her mother’s New Year Eve celebrations. She had barely been able to invite Jen to the party and had hoped Seren would be here with her so the night wouldn’t be a total disaster for her. But no, he had told her he couldn’t be there but had wished he could. Not because he had a trip to Los Angeles, like he said, but because he had left for Boston to spend the week with his other girlfriend. 

And Agatha had believed him when he came back a few days after. She had believed in his half work trip, half boys trip across the country. She never felt as dumb as she was right now. Everything was in front of her all this time, every lie was displayed to her like it was nothing and she hadn’t been able to see the clues and the hints leading to the truth. 

She hated herself, she hated that Rio girl and more importantly, she hated Seren with all her guts for doing this to her . But hating him didn’t make it better or easier. She couldn’t look away from her phone, like her eyes were glued to the photo of Seren and Rio. The way Seren’s arm was around her, holding her close to him the same way he used to do with her. A little possessive, a way to show to the others that she was taken by him, that she was his -but he was never truly hers. But what she hated the most was the look on their faces. The look of happiness and love they shared.

Agatha felt sick just by looking at them, but she couldn’t resolve herself to look away from it. It was like her eyes were attracted by them, like she couldn’t help but keep hurting herself.

“Okey, that’s it, I’m done. Give me your phone now. You’ve been looking at it for ten whole minutes, it’s enough.” she heard before a hand came to take her phone away from her.

“He ! Give me that back Kale !”

“No way. You’re just hurting yourself by looking at it like that. I don’t even know if you want to cry, scream or commit murder. What he did to you was wrong, he’s an asshole, always knew that, but looking at that girl’s instagram won’t change anything.”

Agatha had been at the shop for almost three hours now when she wasn’t supposed to come all day. She had taken her day off from the shop to spend the day with Seren to properly celebrate their eight months together. Jen had been surprised to see her, that Agatha had to tell her what happened and why she needed to change her mind. She couldn’t go to the Opera, and wasn't supposed to go today since she didn’t have training or a show. So it was at the shop she hoped to keep her busy from thinking about everything, but the lack of customers today wasn’t helping much. 

She had spent the first half of the hour telling Jen what happened this morning, from her running to get her metro, being saved by a woman who she happened to follow all the way to Seren’s apartment, to the revelation that followed. Then, they had spent the other half venting before Jen returned to work at the back, leaving Agatha at the front of the shop in case someone came. They had a few customers since, but nothing to keep her away from her thoughts and her mind. 

“I don’t need your I told you so speech right now Jen.”

Jen had never truly trusted Seren since Agatha had started to date him. He seemed like a nice guy, but she didn’t like the fact that they met because of Evanora. She was scared that something was kept hidden from her friend, she didn’t know what, but she didn’t like that his father was working with her friend’s mother. For her, it looked like an arrangement had been made between their families, something Agatha wouldn’t know about. Something that wouldn’t end well. 

In the end, Jen hadn’t been entirely wrong. Something had happened, but it was nothing related to their parents, or at least, not from what they knew of, but it didn’t seem like it. Like it didn’t seem like that girl, Rio, was aware of anything before meeting Agatha. 

“Maybe, but you surely don’t need to keep looking at a photo of them two. What would it give you, huh ? Nothing. The best thing you can do right now is to show that bastard that you’re better than that, that he lost everything by lying to you and by using you. Show him who you are and don’t cry for him.”

“Thanks Jen, but I don’t need your help and I won’t cry for him.”

“So stop lingering on that girl’s instagram page or go home.” she said while giving her her phone back. “He didn’t deserve you Agatha, you’re better than that.”

And she left to where she was coming from, leaving Agatha alone again, sat at the counter in an empty shop. She hated quiet days.

Lunch break had come faster with the arrival of customers that kept Agatha busy and away from her phone for a while, stopping her from torturing herself. But once she was alone in the back of the shop, the sandwich she had bought on her way this morning, her mind was back to Rio’s instagram. An account she started to go through for the second time today, looking more closely at her different posts before stopping, again, on that photo with Seren. 

Agatha kept looking at their smiles, at Seren’s hand on Rio’s waist, at that single red heart as a caption. Compared to earlier, she didn’t feel sick just by looking at them on her phone screen, she felt empty. Jen was right, keep staring at that picture was doing nothing to her or to her situation. It wouldn’t change anything because damage was already done and all she had to do now was to move on. It was easy to say, but it was the best she could do, or at least try to do. 

This time, Agatha looked closely at the publication and she could see that the comment had been enabled, same as the identification. Nothing to trace him, nothing that could lead to his account or appear on his. 

An asshole, but a smart one.

He had thought about everything so no one could know about it, about his two girlfriends. He had been smart, but not enough because the truth always ends up being revealed. 

She thought about getting her revenge on him, about what she could do to do it and how she would feel after doing it. Will she feel better ? Will she feel worse ? Agatha couldn’t know before enacting it, but she wasn’t even sure she really wanted to do it. She was twenty-eight and she wasn’t a highschooler anymore, she was supposed to be past that, right ?

Going back to her investigation of Rio’s publications, her eyes fell on the caption below the photo of them. 

“you got me so high.”  

Ending with an explosion emoji. How creative, just like her username.

And just like before, Agatha felt sick again, ready to throw up the little of her sandwich she had started to eat. She wasn’t hungry anymore, she could feel tears coming to her eyes but took them back. She didn’t want to cry for any of them, didn’t want Jen to see her with ruined makeup and mascara under her eyes. So she took a deep breath, closed her eyes for a minute or two just to clear her mind. Once she opened them, she got a rush of irony from this situation, unlocked her phone, opened her direct message on instagram to send a little something to Rio with her publication attached.

you :

Is your boyfriend mine’s dealer ? ‘Cause he used to get me high too.

On another day, Agatha would have laughed hard at her text, would have found her antics funny, but today she just smiled a little, holding a small and timid laugh. She didn’t even know why she had sent this, what it would give her to have done that. Would that Rio girl ever answer her ? Open her message when they didn’t even follow each other ? All Agatha had to do now was to wait, wait to see if Rio chose to do something. 

In the meantime, she had work to do. She still had to help Jen at the shop for an hour or two before going home and rested a little for the rest of the day. But everytime she was with a customer or talking with her friend, Agatha couldn’t help but think about Rio and wondered if she had texted her back. She was curious about what she would say to her.

Will Rio leave her on read on purpose because she had rejected her earlier ? She had every right to, but Agatha maybe hoped she wouldn't, just for the fun of being able to do it later when she wanted to. 

At 5pm, when she left the shop for the day, Agatha still didn’t have any answer from Rio. Not even an on read. Nothing. Like Rio hadn’t touched her phone since the morning, or since Agatha’s text. Was it any better that way ? Agatha didn’t even know what she expected to happen, she never thought this far when she wrote her text. It was just a spur of the moment. Something she did without reason, but it was still hard not to think about it on her way home and in the metro, back to where she was in the morning. 

Back to where everything started. 

Back to where her world started to collapse and all it took for it to happen was a few seconds. 

Once Agatha was back at her apartment, she felt like she could breathe again. The comfort of her own home made her feel better. Like the weight on her shoulders had disappeared, same as the lump in the throat that had been here since she left Seren’s apartment. There was no better place than home to make you feel better and Agatha could feel it in this instant. Being back home made her realize how uneasy she had felt since the morning, something she hadn’t before. Maybe this whole situation had touched her more than what she wanted to admit. It had played with her mind a little too much during the day she was glad to be home and to have something else to do. 

The first thing she did was to find Senior Scratchy, her rabbit she had adopted almost two years ago in a spur of the moment. It was a few weeks after meeting Seren for the first time. She was coming back from an event that had been transformed into a date between them. One of their parents’ first schemes, one in many others that just exhausted her at the end. That day she was tired of everything, she just started dancing at the Opera, did her first months of show and all she wanted was to spend a chill weekend. Not to stand in high heels that hurt her feet, for one of her mother’s galas she couldn’t care less about. 

Agatha remembered perfectly that day. It was the end of the day, most of the shops were about to close and she was on her way home when she walked by a pet store. She had stopped in the front for a few seconds before walking in and coming out later with the rabbit in his cage. 

She had never thought about getting a pet, never really wanted one. Agatha loved animals, but taking care of one was so much work that she didn’t feel like she was able to do it. She wanted them to have a nice family, a good home full of love and treats. It wasn’t something she grew up with and really doubted her capacity to give it to an animal. In the end, she was wrong. Two years had passed and Scratchy was the real king of her apartment. He could do whatever he wanted, she would always forgive him, no matter the hundreds of threats she threw at him, she still hadn’t cooked a single rabbit pie with him. 

“Hi mister, how are we today ? The day wasn’t too boring all alone ?” she said in her small voice she only used it with him, while walking to his pen. “Sorry for coming home late, I helped Jen at the shop.” opening the pen, she took Scratchy in her arms so she could cuddle him a little. And it was like he could feel something was off with Agatha, because he just nuzzled a little more in her arms, like he was giving her a hug back. “Can I tell you something Senior ? Jen was right, Seren is an asshole. I can’t believe I dated him when I promised myself I wouldn’t date any of the men my mother forced me to meet.” 

And Agatha spent the next forty five minutes on her couch, Scratchy in her laps, enjoying her caress, while she was telling him everything that had happened. Just like she did with Jen in the morning. She talked about her stop at the pastry shop to pick up the cake she had ordered for their anniversary. How she almost didn’t catch her train if it wasn’t for the help of a stranger and how that same stranger ended up being Seren’s girlfriend. His second girlfriend. Or was she the first girlfriend because they were together for a year when it was only eight months with Agatha ? 

She had talked about the confrontation with Seren, how she had smashed the cake in his face before leaving him. At that, Scratchy had given her arm a little thump, like he was agreeing with what she did. Or it was how Agatha chose to interpret it. Like he was saying ‘good job mommy, you showed him’ and that’s why she loved her bunny this much. Because no matter what she could do, he will always agree with her and stay by her side. 

Animals are way better than men. That was what Agatha was thinking when she let Scratchy wander in her apartment. Something she always lets him do once she’s back from work. 

Today had been a pretty hard day for Agatha and even if she was happy to be back home, surrounded by her things, something was off. Something was bothering her, preventing her from feeling completely at home. Her eyes wandered around her, analyzing her surroundings for anything that would be wrong. But at first sight, nothing seemed out of place she thought, for an instant, she was starting to be crazy. Then, her eyes catched something that made her pulse quicken and her fists clenched. 

Seren’s hoodie right in front of her, perfectly placed on the back of the armchair, humoring her like she was nothing. Like when he said to that girl she meant nothing in front of her face. How could he say something like that ? Like those two years of getting to know each other were nothing more than dust on his shoes. Same for their relationship Agatha was scared to start because of her own mother. She hadn’t really told him her reluctance about what it could mean for them, for their parents. Or her fears about what could happen next once they would find out. 

She had never been clear about all of that, but from what Seren had told her, had shown her, he seemed as reluctant as her, as scared of what’s next as her. Agatha had thought they understood each other so that they didn’t have to say some things. She was wrong, but Agatha is never wrong, it’s the others who are wrong. Seren had just lied to her, messed with her so he could manipulate her more easily. 

She hated men now. She didn’t need one in her life like her mother used to tell her. 

But maybe Evanora was right ? Maybe it was just Seren who wasn’t as perfect as her mother picture him. Maybe he wasn’t meant for her but another one could be. She just had to meet him. 

Grabbing Seren’s hoodie, Agatha felt a rush of adrenaline pulsing in her veins. His things needed to be out of her apartment. Everything that could remind her of him ? Out or in the trash. She needed to clean her apartment, to do something so it could feel like home like it used to do until today. She had to clean her past with Seren for something new. For a new chapter in her life, one that would be better -and with no man for now. 

Once she was out of the shower, wrapped in a towel, the steam had reached the mirror, blurring her own reflection from her eyes, but not enough. Agatha could still catch a few glimpses of herself, see how her body was reflecting behind the steam. A little blurred, marked -or bruised at some places- by the hours she spent training and dancing classical dance.

Did Seren go to another girl, date her, because Agatha wasn’t enough for him ? Rio was a nice woman, she had her own charm -even if Agatha couldn’t stop thinking she was a lesbian. And from what she saw today, from this morning or on her instagram, she had a nice body. An athletic body with abs showing up under her tops, a sharp jaw that most women might dream of. She was a dancer, doing competition from what Agatha had seen on social media. There was no doubt Rio was training hard to stay on top. No wonder Seren had liked her, had been attracted to her despite her appearance giving lesbian energy. 

If she was attracted to women, Agatha might have liked her too. But she wasn’t and she didn’t like her. She didn’t even know how she felt about her, but at least she knew she didn’t like her that way. 

She was still dreaming, looking at her reflection half wrapped in her towel when a buzz pulled her out of her thoughts. Reaching for her phone that sat on the edge of the sink, Agatha wondered who was disturbing her right now. She had seen Jen earlier, so if she didn’t need her for something that came up since, it wasn’t her. Unless she wanted to chat, but if Agatha remembered correctly, she said she had a date or something that night. Maybe it was her mother who was reminding her about an event she had to go to, a new one in many others that will follow. 

Once she looked at her phone, she was surprised to see it wasn’t one of them but an instagram’s notification telling her she had a new message from someone. 

New message from @evilgreenhag.

Rio had finally answered her at 8pm. She had given her an answer when Agatha wasn’t waiting for one anymore because she had completely forgotten about it. She wasn’t thinking about it anymore, torturing her mind with it, wondering why she did that. 

@evilgreenhag : 

Poor you ‘cause the drugs are really poor. 

Chapter Text

RIO

After leaving Seren’s apartment, Rio didn’t even bother to take the metro again. She didn’t care if she had to walk for an hour or two to the dance studio to give her lessons. She didn’t want to walk by another hypothetical girlfriend of her boyfriend -or ex-boyfriend at this point. If he was dating two girls at the same time, what could stop him from dating a third one ? Or even a fourth ? Nothing. Nothing would stop him for anything and just thinking about it made Rio angrier than she already was. 

The strange feeling she had since she woke up, the feeling that something would happen any time today ? It was right. Her guts were warning her and she just shut it down with music so she wouldn’t overthink it. Rio had been wrong to do that because something did happen today. It wasn’t just any other feeling she could ignore like she used to when she started to overthink a little too much. It was real. It was what was shaking her right now, what was making her walk faster than necessary in New-York’s streets. 

Rio felt dumb. She felt dumb because this same morning she was thinking about telling her parents about her relationship. Something she put energy in for a whole year. Something she made grew from nothing to something that felt like it was real. But what relationship will she talk about now ? There wasn’t any relationship to talk about anymore. Just betrayal, anger and a heart that must be broken now. There wasn’t any Seren and Rio to talk about anymore. There was just Rio, all alone, again, facing the reality of her life falling apart, again. 

“Already here ? I wasn’t expecting you for another hour.” a voice said barely a second after Rio had stepped foot in the studio. Looking at the person who quickly spotted her, she saw Hela, her eyes on her watch, coming from the room the dance teachers shared for lunches and breaks.

“I know, I know. I was bored so I came.”

Hela was her friend for a decade now. They had met in college and hadn’t left each other's side since. She was working at the studio for years, choosing stability over her prestigious career when she became pregnant with her first child. Hela had worked for multiple artists, went on tour around the world and had even appeared on music videos. She wasn’t a nobody like Rio, Hela was a name in their domain. She had pursued her dreams for years before leaving everything behind for her family. They were more important than anything else and she was proving it everyday.

Hela was Rio’s friend, but she was always an inspiration for her. 

“Bored ? Aren’t you supposed to have a boyfriend to keep you busy ? Or did romance change that much ?” her smirk made Rio want to vomit at her feet. 

“He’s still sick and still doesn't want me to see him.” Rio said with a small smile, trying to hide her discomfort behind a lie she hoped was good. But she wasn’t a master in lying like Seren was. Hela knew her friend, she knew something was off with her, but didn’t say much. She knew if Rio wanted to talk, she'd do it.

“Sad for you. Anyway, I have a course to do, so I’ll see you at lunch after your class. Have fun !” 

Rio was glad she didn’t try to know what was happening with her. Not that she didn’t want to talk about it, but she didn’t want to talk about it now. So she just waved her goodbye before entering her class, closing the door behind her so she could be and feel alone. She didn’t really want to be alone, because if she was she knew she would start to overthink. And overthinking was the last thing she wanted to do right now. But she also didn’t want to see her colleagues who would ask her how she was doing ? Or why she was already here, an hour before her class started. Now wasn’t the time.

So she was alone, facing the wall length mirror in her class so she could see herself. Rio didn’t know what she was looking for, but she was looking, observing herself, analyzing herself. And all she could see was a woman who had been dumb enough to believe she had found a good guy she could talk about to her parents. Her parents, who wished to see her happy and in love. A good enough guy who would cherish her like she was the world, his world. A good enough guy who would make her feel like she was the most precious woman in the world, who would make her feel like a queen. 

He barely did all those things. 

What kind of good guy tends to hide his girlfriend even after months or a year of dating ? Not that she was any better for that one. But what kind of boyfriend hesitates for a picture with his girlfriend ? Who asks for not sharing it on social media or to not identify him if it goes on social media ? 

Seren seemed to be a great guy, but now that Rio knew his biggest secret -she wished it was his biggest and only- she could see all his red flags she had purposefully ignored even if they were in front of her all this time. She had blinded herself over the possibility of finally having a serious relationship with someone, not a fling or a one night stand like she’s used to. Not that she had something against those, she didn’t because she had chosen to only have those for a time. But she hadn’t found the force to say no when Seren had shown interest in her, had shown he liked her and wanted more with her. 

She had been weak, delighted to be desired like that by someone else. By someone who wasn’t going to leave her in the morning before she was awake or someone who will forget her if she was the one to leave in the morning. She had been weak and she had believed all his sweet words and now she hated herself for it. With more perspective in the last year, now she was aware of all the dark side that was hidden to her, Rio didn’t recognize herself.

Rio had never been that weak and soft for someone who wasn’t her parents or her bestfriends. Being sweet, like she had been, for a man -even if he was her boyfriend ? Accepting all his weird behavior -or at least, ignoring them ? It wasn’t who she was, not before, not now and not ever. She was blaming Seren for making her that soft and dumb over someone, for making her believe it was who she was deep down inside herself. Making her believe it was who she was in a serious relationship, because it wasn’t who she had been before and it wasn’t someone she will be again. 

The idea of getting revenge wasn’t that bad, no matter what that Agatha girl said when she proposed some ideas. Not that what she had proposed was any good. Who would care about what Seren did to them on the internet ? No one. Slashing his tires wasn’t that bad, but he came from a healthy family so he would have someone to help him pretty fast. It wouldn’t bother him that much. She could put laxatives in his food or his drinks, he would be more bothered and couldn’t do a lot about it, except waiting for it to pass. But Rio didn’t know how she could do it. She couldn’t come to his apartment like she used to, even if she knew where he put his spare key. It would be strange and maybe Seren was still there. 

“Let’s forget about this.” she said in a sigh, walking away from the mirror she was still in front of since she arrived. 

Maybe Agatha was right, maybe Rio was past getting revenge like a high school teenager. She was in her thirties after all and she had better things to do in her days. Like giving her dance lessons to teenagers who were supposed to arrive in half an hour. 

She was getting ready, trading her shirt and jeans she was wearing for her white sports bra and her sage Nike oversized sweatpants. Even if Rio was dancing tango at competition level, teaching it and modern jazz, she was also giving hip hop lessons to teenagers. Dancing was her passion, she had shown interest in it at a young age thanks to her mom who also was a dance teacher. It was life saving for her, so it wasn’t strange for her parents when she had asked to learn all those dances. Modern jazz had been her first love, tango her second because it was her mom’s favorite and what she used to teach. Hip hop came late in her life, but it was her true love, her soulmate, something that really felt like her and she hadn’t stopped dancing it since she started. 

“Hi Miss Rio !” came a joyful voice behind her and Rio already knew who it was.

“Billy hi ! Always early, what’s up ?”

William Kaplan, or Billy as he prefers to be called now, was a teenager that used to be in one of her mom’s classes, learning a different dance than hip hop. He disappeared for a few years before coming back two years ago, completely changed and asking to be called Billy. Rio had a soft spot for him and his emo style, and it seemed like he had one for her too. Always coming early to her class, always leaving a long time after everyone was gone, taking time to talk with her about everything. He was a nice kid who had lived a life changing experience and hip hop had helped him to be more open to the world again. His parents had thanked Rio a lot, even if she didn’t know what she had done exactly. But apparently he had never stopped to talk about her to his parents. 

“I finally came out to my parents ! Thanks for our talk last month, it helped me a lot.”

“Miss Rio, can I ask you something ?” Billy’s voice came from behind while she was drinking some water.

“Yes, of course.” once she looked at him, she could see him trituring with his fingers, like he was stressed or was hesitating to talk to her about something. “What’s up ?” Rio was trying to be unbothered like she hadn’t seen how uncomfortable he was right now. 

“How did you come out to your parents ?”

If Rio had managed to show nothing before, she couldn’t hide the surprise that was illuminating her face right now.

“When I came out ?”

“Yeah … How did they take it ? Were they mad ? Disappointed ? Or I don’t know … How was it ?” 

“Well … What makes you think I came out to my parents ?” she asked, curious to know what had led him to ask this.

“Because you’re … I mean …” Billy was struggling to form any coherent sentence, to find any good words to express what was in his mind right now. 

“Billy, I’m not gay.” she said with a small smile on her face. 

“You’re not ? I’m sorry, I thought … You said you were going in a relationship, I thought-”

“Calm down Billy, it’s okey ! I’m bi actually.” she cut him straight when she saw how sorry and scared he was by assuming something that was wrong -well, half wrong. “But I have a boyfriend, Seren, not a girlfriend.” Rio couldn’t help but smile a little to the teenager who was finally looking at her. “And to answer your question, I never had to come out to my parents because they surprised me in high school making out with a girl, Riley. I was seventeen and she was my first girlfriend. They never said anything about it, they just accepted that I could have a girlfriend like I could have a boyfriend.”

And Billy said nothing after her revelation, like he had lost the ability to talk with how uncomfortable he seemed to be by assuming Rio was a lesbian. Putting her water back in her bag, she turned completely to him so she could look at him properly while talking. 

“Why are you curious about that ?” she asked even if she had understood what had led him to ask this. “Wanna talk about it ?”

“I met this guy in high school, Eddie. He’s new in town and I helped him in school with everything. We talked a lot and …” and Billy was back to not looking at Rio, focusing on his fingers he was still playing with. “And we kissed a few weeks ago and started dating, but my parents don’t know about it.”

“And I guess you want to tell them. Do they know about Eddie already ?”

“They met him once or twice, but they think we are friends … I don’t know how to tell them. What if they can’t accept that I’m gay ? What if they force me to not see Eddie again ? Or worse, what if they kick me out of the house ? 

“Billy, your parents love you, I doubt they could kick you out.”

“You don’t know that ! They’re so overprotective since my accident, they’re not the same as before, they can always do that ! We never know.”

“Just like you’re not the same as before.” her voice was soft. Rio knew how Billy’s accident had scared his parents who had almost lost their son. She had seen it when his mother came to her dance practice with Hela. “What happened to you wasn’t anything, you can’t blame your parents for being afraid of losing you and of wanting the best for you. And because they want the best for you, they deserve the benefit of the doubt about you coming out to them. I don’t know them like I know you, but I assure you they love you very much and they only want what’s best for you. So, if right now the best for you is Eddie, so be it. Don’t be afraid of telling them how happy you are with him. You are happy with him, right ?”

“I have never been this happy in my life since my accident.” his smile was so big, Rio wouldn’t be surprised if his cheeks were hurting. 

“Tell them that ! I think they would be happy to know, and if you need you can always practice with me what you want to say to them.” 

“I didn’t do much but I’m glad it helped you. So, since you’re not crying or blaming your parents for not being cool enough, I guess it went well ?” 

“It did even if they freaked out a little when I asked if he could come one day. But they agreed, so Eddie is coming for dinner this weekend. Mom is already planning everything.”

“That’s nice then. I’m happy for you Billy.”

At least, between the two of them, one was having a good relationship where boyfriend and parents were meeting and where honesty seemed to be a part of. Billy was still young and innocent, he deserved to be in a good relationship where lies were not the foundation of everything. Rio wanted him to be happy, to discover everything love had to offer. He had time before being met with disappointment, hurt and broken heart. 

“Miss Rio, what did you do for your one year anniversary ? Did Seren take you out for dinner ?”

She couldn’t be mad at him for asking. Since he knew about her and Seren, he used to ask her a lot about their relationship, how they met, if they went on a date during the weekend. And Rio always answered him happily, until now. But Billy didn’t know about Seren’s lie, or about what Rio had discovered this morning.

“He had planned a little trip to Boston.”

“That’s where you went last week ! Was it good ?” his eyes went big and brilliant at the news. A little dreamy at the idea that one day he could go on a trip with his boyfriend without his parents freaking out about it.

“Yes, it was. It was nice” she barely gave him a smile, but he didn’t seem to notice how uncomfortable and uneasy Rio was by talking about Seren. She was happy when he left to get ready for practice, leaving her alone before the other students came so the class could start. 

“Good work today everybody, it was nice ! Next week we’ll focus on the dance for the end-of-year show, so be ready ! Until then, have a nice week. See you next time !” she made her voice go a little higher so her students could hear her when they started packing up before leaving the studio. “And Billy, I want to know everything about the dinner !” she said to her favorite teenager before he left.

“You will, Miss Rio ! See you next week !”

And just like that, Rio was back to be alone in her studio. The music was off and the chatting were becoming increasingly distant until she couldn’t hear the teenagers anymore. She enjoyed the silence of the room a little while it lasted until she heard the buzzing of her phone against the floor where she put it next to the speaker. Thinking it was a text from her dad she had to call, she took it without looking at the notification on her screen but stopped when she saw nothing coming from the text chain with her dad. She searched for a few seconds before seeing the instagram notification.

@agatha_hrknss has sent you a text request.

@agatha_hrknss : 

Is your boyfriend mine’s dealer ? ‘Cause he used to get me high too.

Rio thought she was dreaming when she read the text coming from Agatha. She never thought she’d receive one, not after the discovery they had made this morning and how things had ended with Agatha. They didn’t know each other and it meant that Agatha had searched for her on social media, had gone through her account before sending her a text with one of her publications attached. Not any publication, it was the only picture she had posted with Seren. The only one he had accepted her to share but she wasn’t allowed to tag him on it. 

One of his precautions for his lies to stay safe. Rio was mad at herself for having blindly accepted every of his requests. She had never asked why she couldn’t share more pictures of them on her social media. She just did what he had asked, like it was the most normal thing. It wasn’t. It was the first hint of his lies and strange behavior. 

Rio didn’t understand why Agatha had reached to her when she had told her she didn’t want to be friends. Not that Rio was asking for it, but they were the victims of Seren’s behavior, so she thought they could at least be cordial to each other, help each other in this situation. Agatha had been clear about it in the morning, but her text was going against everything she had said before. 

It was enough to confuse Rio. 

“Hey Rio, come eat with us !” it was Hela, right at the door of her studio, smiling at her. “What are you doing ? We’re waiting for you.”

“I’m coming !”

Closing her instagram app, Rio decided that Agatha’s text was a problem for later today. She didn’t want to overthink it right now, she already did it enough since the morning and she needed a time off from this situation. 

me :

Hi dad, how are you ? Can’t call you at lunch, but I’m still coming after work tonight.

See ya. Love u.

Usually, Rio always took some time to call her dad who, she knew, was always with her mom. He spent most of his days when he wasn’t working : next to her, looking after her. Luis was a strong man who chose to sell his flower shop, that he always dreamt about, to support his wife in her sickness. He had vowed to stay in sickness and in health, and he had honored the promise he made on their wedding day. 

Rio had always admired her parents and their relationship. It was something pure, honest and full of love. She had always seen them talk instead of running when things were hard on them and her mom’s sickness was the proof of it. Her dad had never run away from Leslie, he had stayed with her, supporting her in every step, bad or good -and only God knew how many bad steps they had before having only one good. Luis was always there, doing everything he could so his wife could feel better, even if it was only a little. They inspired Rio, made her have faith in true love she still believed was still somewhere out there.

Hers was just not with Seren, now she was sure of it. 

“So, what’s wrong with you today ?” Hela’s tone of voice was gentle enough towards Rio for her not to feel trapped in a situation she would feel uncomfortable. But it still managed to convey her concern for her friend, urging her to finally be honest with her.

They were at lunch for forty minutes now and today it was just the two of them, Hela and Rio. They sat around the table in front of the window that gave them a look on the street below. They had barely talked if it wasn’t to say how their respective classes went. Hela had also told her friend how her kids were doing, saying they had spent a few days with their grandparents who were visiting the city. Rio was remaining silent most of the time, trying to give a few answers to her friend so she would feel too alone. But her mind was elsewhere.

“Me ? Nothing, everything’s good.” Rio was trying to deflect the inevitable, she wasn’t overjoyed by the idea of talking about Seren and what he had done. But she knew Hela wasn’t going to leave her alone that easily.

“Don’t lie to me, Rio. I know you and I can see that something is bothering you. Is it your mom ? Is she okey ?” her concern was easy to distinguish in the changes of her voice.

“Yeah, my mom is fine. I’m seeing my dad tonight, but she’s fine.” 

“Then what is it ? Is it Seren ?” hearing his name coming from her friends mouth, Rio instinctively clenched her fists around her fork. “It’s him isn’t it ? What did he do ?”

Of course Hela had noticed the micro change in her friend. Rio couldn’t hide something from her, she could read her like an open book. 

“Hela-”

“Don’t Hela me !” even if her voice was still soft, Hela didn’t hesitate long before cutting Rio with a more sharper voice. “Tell me what he did.”

Did Rio want to talk about it ? Not really, but the look in her friend’s eyes was telling her enough to know she wouldn’t leave her alone before she told her. 

“He wasn’t sick.” she started to say, referencing what they had said before, but Hela didn’t seem to connect everything. So before she could cut her again, Rio talked again. “He lied so he could spend the day with his girlfriend for their eight month anniversary or whatever it’s called.” putting her fork down, Rio couldn’t tear her eyes away from her food she barely ate.

“Did you not celebrate your one year together already ?” to that, Rio only just nodded in response. “So why eight months ? .. Wait. No.” Rio looked up at her friend, watching how her face went through a thousand emotions in the space of a few seconds. The realization grew slowly in her mind. “Tell me it’s not what I’m thinking right now.”

“Depends on what you’re thinking actually.”

“Don’t tell me he was cheating on you ?” she asked, but she already knew the answer, she could see it in Rio’s eyes. “That bastard. How did you find out ? Did that girl open the door half naked ? Did she know about you ?”

“Gross, no ! Damn it, Hela, don’t put images in my mind like that.” burying her head in her hands, Rio groaned at her friend’s insinuations, refusing to imagine the scene she could have walked in over the past eight months. “No, I met the other girl, Agatha, outside his building. I wanted to see him this morning ‘cause he told me he was still sick, but he was just planning to meet with her. She had a cake, Hela. A cake that ended right in Seren’s face once we found out.” she began to recount the events of the morning. “When he took me to Boston last week, he told her he was in Los Angeles for a work thing or I don’t know what. She didn’t know either, Hela, he lied to both of us for months and we just found out. I just found out when I was thinking about presenting him to my parents.”

For the first time today, Rio could feel her throat tightening, the tears threatened to fall. Not that she wanted to cry for Seren, but because she had been stupid enough to throw herself blindly into a relationship. 

“What’s wrong with me ? Why can’t I have something good, something real ?”

“Nothing is wrong with you, Rio. It’s him who did wrong, who’s the bastard in this situation. He’s the one who lied to you both, who used you two. You are not the one to blame, Rio, don’t do that.” Rio could feel her friend wanting to comfort her, hesitating to put her hand on her arm. But Hela knew better and the best was to give Rio the space she needed. So she kept her hand for herself, using only her words to help her friend. “He doesn’t deserve anything, especially not your tears.”

“I won’t cry for him, I don’t want to see him anymore. I just … I can’t believe it happened. Who does something like that ?”

“Someone who doesn't care about anyone. Someone who’s egoist enough to not feel any guilt in what he’s doing. There’s no excuses for what he did, but I’m sorry Rio. I’m so sorry it happened to you, I know what it means to you to present someone to your parents. Especially now, but you’re better than him. You’re better than any of it.”

There was something in Hela’s words that warmed Rio’s heart, that made her feel a little better than she was, even if she still felt bad about her ruined relationship and about herself. 

“Listen, you know that if you need anything I’m here right ? And Alice too and Nat too. Don’t hesitate to give us a call, we can always hang out together, go to some bar or you can always come to my place if you need. Just … Just give me a call, Rio, I’m here for you.”

If there was something Rio was glad about her life, it was her friends. She knew Alice since they were kids, Natasha since high school and Hela since college. Their group grew up with each of them. They built something real, something powerful like a second family who was always there when one of them needed it. She wouldn’t trade their friendship for anything in the world. They knew Rio sometimes better than Rio herself.

“I know, Hela, thanks.”

 Rio could rely on dancing and trying to teach dance to a bunch of teenagers to keep her mind busy. She didn’t think about Seren, or Agatha or even Agatha’s text for a few hours until her last group left the studio. Then, she was back at being alone and being alone meant she had all the time in the world to overthink everything. She was tired of overthinking, she couldn’t do it anymore. She wished she could just shut down her brain for the rest of her day -of the week if only she could. But she couldn’t do it, not when overthinking was all she could do to keep her busy while she was back in the metro, in the middle of everyone. 

If Rio hated overthinking, she hated public transport more. The metro more than anything. She hated having to take it to go around the city since she didn’t have a car or her bike anymore. Fuck being underground, where she couldn’t look up at the sky and see the city or feel the air on her face. She felt trapped in a cage that was only meant to crash against a wall or ended up dead in those tunnels where she was sure she could lose herself in. Not that she had a bad sense of direction, on the contrary, but she needed to be in the fresh air, outside to get her bearings. Underground ? She had no point of reference to help her. 

She took it upon herself not to fall apart in her train everyday, but being kinda claustrophobic wasn’t helping her case and she was glad every time she walked back to the surface. Feeling like she could finally breathe again. 

“Hi dad, sorry I’m late !” Rio walked faster once she saw her dad, sitting on a bench outside of the hospital, waiting to see her like he always does. They always met outside, never inside because Rio couldn’t go see her mother, not yet. “How are you ? How’s mami ?”

“Rio, mija, you’re here !” his face lit up when his eyes landed on his daughter's silhouette, standing so he could hug her tight. “I’m fine, your mom is as fine as she can, but you know her. She’s a fighter and it’s not her first rodeo. She’ll get there.”

“I know she is, but since it's not her first rodeo I’m worried. I wish I could see her.” 

In the past few years, Leslie Vidal went back and forth to the hospital and most of the time Rio wasn’t allowed to go see her, only her dad was. Even if she could understand it was for her mom’s best, it was hard for Rio not to see her as often as she wanted. She was grateful to live in a time where text, phone calls and video calls existed because it was the only way she got to talk with her mother. It wasn’t much, but it was enough when Leslie could call and answer her texts. 

“How are you dad, really ? You seem tired …”

“I’m fine mija. Work’s been hard lately, we need more hands at the dealership but things are doing great.”

“Don’t overwork yourself dad. I’ll soon get my pay so I could help you with mami’s hospital bills. Don’t worry about that, take care of you and mom, I’ll deal with that.”

“Mija …” the words were breathed out in a long and exhausted sigh, as if all her father’s strength evaporated along with his daughter’s tenacity in wanting to help him. Even when she knew she didn’t have to. 

Rio knew that tone, Luis always using it when he was preparing himself to face his stubborn daughter. Since he had sold the flower shop to work in a dealership so he could go see his wife more often, Rio had chosen to help her parents in everything. That’s why most of her pay at the studio was going to her father so he could pay the hospital’s bills without ending up with too much debt. Even if she got barely enough to pay her rent and buy her groceries, Rio wouldn’t do things differently. Some weekends she was working at Alice’s bar to help her -not that she really needed her. 

She didn’t want her dad to overwork, but it didn’t matter if she did. She was thirty-two and her parents had done enough for her before that now she wanted to do it for them. 

“I don’t care what you’re gonna say. I’ll send you the money when I get paid.” if she knew what the tone her dad was using meant, it was the same for Luis who understood that his daughter wouldn’t change her mind. Not when she was doing it from the beginning.

“How’s work at the studio ? How’s everyone doing there ?” 

Rio knew he was asking especially for her mom. Being away from the studio she built with her friend was hard for her, the hardest being when she had to step down from her post because of her sickness. She could remember when Leslie went into depression when everything started to fall apart around her. It was a hard time for the Vidal’s family, but for Leslie it was like the end of the world. She was sick, she had to leave her dreams behind so she could get help. Her husband chose to leave his dreams and what he worked hard all his life for only to stay by her side and support her. And her daughter had chosen to give most of her pay to help her parents in this difficult time. 

Their lives had turned upside down in a matter of only a few seconds and she was sick of it. Leslie was mad because, without wanting it, she had changed everything in their life. But in return, they had helped her everyday since the diagnosis came. If she was still alive today it was because of them.

“Everything’s fine, work’s great lately. We all have full classes this year and Naomi said it might stay like that next year. She’s confident and she’s thinking about renovating some parts of the studio that need work.”

“That’s great, Leslie will be happy to hear that.”

Naomi was like an aunt to Rio. Her mom’s best friend who was always around when she grew up. They created the studio together, put everything they had in it only because they wanted to teach their passion : the dance. Rio’s love for dancing comes from them.

“Tell her we’re even looking for a new teacher, we’re trying to open more classes with different dances than the one we already have. And we’ll be able to relaunch summer classes this year, we’re working on it with Naomi.”

Rio had not taken her mother’s place in the head of the studio, but it was like she did. Naomi and her often talked about stuff they could do, managing a lot of things together. It wasn’t official, yet, but to everyone who knew Leslie Vidal, it was like Rio was replacing her until she came back from the hospital. 

They kept talking for a good hour before leaving together to grab something to eat around the hospital. There was a small restaurant, nothing too fancy, but it was enough for them so they could eat together every time Rio was coming to see him at the hospital. It was better than the hospital’s cafeteria, even if they could see some familiar faces they get used to seeing and know with time. 

“Mija, you talk a lot about work and your friends, but what about a lover ?”

At that question, Rio felt her heart tighten in her chest. Her parents didn’t know about Seren, and if she wanted to tell them this morning, there wasn’t anything to talk about now.

“What about it ?” she pretended not to understand what her father was getting at.

“Don’t you have a boy or a girl in mind ? Someone who makes you happy ?”

“I have the studio and my friends for that.” Rio was playing dumb but it was easier than the truth.

“That’s not what I mean, mija.”

“I know, dad but there’s no one in my life like that.” there was no one anymore.

“I just want to see you happy and loved, mija.”

“I am happy and it’s the only thing I need right now. That and seeing mom getting better. The rest ? It’s pointless.”

It hadn’t been that pointless in the last year, but now that Rio had seen the real Seren, she was back where she was before meeting him. Her love life wasn’t her priority and she ended her life alone, that suited her just as well. She was done putting her trust and her heart to someone who will surely break it into a million pieces. At least, by being single, she wouldn’t have her heart broken. 

It was almost 8pm when Rio was back to her small apartment, falling instantly on her couch, exhausted by her day. It’s only when she took her phone and unlocked it she saw Agatha’s text that was still waiting for an answer since she sent it at lunch. With everything, she had completely forgotten about it and she could almost feel guilty for it if Agatha hadn't been so unkind to her this morning. 

Rio still didn’t understand what had crossed Agatha’s mind to make her reach her on social media. But she put it on her psycho personality she seemed to have. It suited her. 

@agatha_hrknss : 

Is your boyfriend mine’s dealer ? ‘Cause he used to get me high too.

you : 

Poor you ‘cause the drugs are really poor.

After sending her text, Rio took some time to go through her account. Lots of pictures of her dancing, of her promoting the Opera and her last show. 

So Agatha was a classical dancer, that was explaining lots of things in Rio’s mind. She understood where this grace, she had noticed when they were leaving the metro, came from. Why she was walking like she was floating in the air, perched on those high heels Rio hated wearing when she was dancing tango. Feet killer. 

Her feed gave her some credits, took some of that psycho personality Rio was giving her for something more human, but still different. 

“She has a nice smile for someone that psycho” she sighed, looking at one of the pictures Agatha posted with her friends. She was wearing a simple black dress with fine straps that hold it on her shoulders, her wavy blonde hair perfectly framing her face. She wasn’t wearing much makeup, but it was enough to bring out the blue in her eyes.

@agatha_hrknss : 

Good that I left him then.

you :

You’re the winner in this divorce. Enjoy your victory

@agatha_hrknss : 

I know I am, he’s a loser for playing dumb and letting go of such a wonderful woman like me.

you :

Not too full of yourself.

@agatha_hrknss : 

We must appreciate what we have.

you :

And what does he have, now ?

@agatha_hrknss : 

His right hand, porn and maybe drugs so his life feels less boring now that he lost his two girlfriends.

Psycho, but she was funny in her own way and Rio found herself smiling and even holding back several laughs while she spoke to her.

They went back and forth for several minutes before hunger got the better of Rio. Her stomach was rambling, asking for food she barely had in her fridge and she couldn’t spend more money on delivery. So she took the rest of her dino cereals, adding a mental note in her mind to not forget to buy some when she’ll have to do her groceries. But for now, it was all she had to appease her hunger, sitting on her couch she had unfolded into a bed.

Rio was living in her small apartment, where her bedroom was also her living room. Luckily, she had a separate kitchen, although the half-partition didn’t really act as a barrier between the two rooms, allowing smells and more to wander freely around her apartment. It wasn’t a mansion, her old apartment was better than this one with a separate bedroom and enough place to feel like home, but it was all Rio could offer for now. 

Sometimes, before you could get the best, you had to reach the lowest. Rio was at her lowest and she knew she could only go higher. 

Tomorrow will always be better than today. 

Chapter Text

AGATHA

On the same night …

you :

Tell me clever girl

you :

Why do you dance so many different dances ? Not enough with one ?

@evilgreenhag : 

Because I like it ?

you :

I knew I was right to call you, clever girl …

@evilgreenhag : 

Why do I need to have a reason ?

you :

Bc I’m asking ?

you :

I’m asking nicely

@evilgreenhag : 

And bc I love that is not enough bc ..?

you :

Bc it’s boring asf

@evilgreenhag : 

You’re calling me boring ?

you :

Yes.

you :

So ? I’m still waiting.

@evilgreenhag : 

I learnt to dance modern jazz bc of my mom’s bff, I used to sneak into her classes and I just liked it. Tango it’s from my mom, it’s her favorite. She’s teaching it at the studio I’m working at now.

@evilgreenhag : 

I grew up watching her dance and I just did the same at some point

you :

Never thought you were a modern jazz or a tango dancer.

you :

What about hip hop then ? Maybe it comes from your dad too ?

you :

You know, like a family business or something

@evilgreenhag :

No, I started dancing hip hop in my senior year and never stopped since. 

@evilgreenhag : 

My dad is not a dancer, he prefers plants but he did give me his passion too

you :

What did I say ? Family business.

@evilgreenhag : 

What about you ?

you :

What about me ?

@evilgreenhag : 

Why classical dance ? It’s not always young kids’ first choice

you :

I liked it when my mom brought me to some dance shows when I was a kid. I started to learn at a young age and now I’m at the Opera.

@evilgreenhag : 

Sooo

@evilgreenhag : 

Family business too.

you :

No

you :

my mom never danced compared to yours.

Days passed pretty smoothly, Agatha worked like she used to between the New-York Opera and Jen’s shop, sometimes disturbed from time to time by a new text from Rio. Since they had started talking a week ago, they hadn’t really stopped. It wasn’t a regular back-and-forth, just a few exchanges here and there, sometimes more at night when they were both free. They slowly get to know each other more, but not once they talk about Seren or the relationship they each had with him. Like it was a sensitive subject. And it was. Like a limit none of them wanted to cross and wouldn’t do. They knew it, like a silent agreement between them. 

They were not exactly friends, but they were not enemies like they could have been only because they had one common enemy : Seren, who hurt them both by being his egoist self. And like people used to say ; the enemy of your enemy is your new best friend.

Or that was what Agatha said to Jen when she asked her why she was talking to Rio like that. That and the fact that, even if they had clearly different styles and life, they loved some of the same things. And one of the most obvious things was dance, even if also here their styles were pretty different too. 

A lot could draw them apart, but it did click between them and talking to Rio was a nice distraction for Agatha. When she wasn’t doing her smartass that just annoyed her. 

@evilgreenhag : 

Not to judge, but I find it hard to imagine you dancing with a tutu. 

you :

Like I think it’s weird for you to date men ?

@evilgreenhag : 

Fuck you.

@evilgreenhag : 

Not you too, I already have a student who thought I was gay. Can’t a girl be bisexual in peace ?

you :

That kid knows what they’re talking about.

you :

You clearly have lesbian vibes.

@evilgreenhag : 

Ooh bc you have a gaydar now ?

@evilgreenhag : 

You, Agatha Harkness, the straight ballet girl ?

you :

A what now ?

you :

Can’t you talk like a normal person for god's sake ?

you :

What ballet did to you so you hate it that much ?

@evilgreenhag : 

Like I said, straight girl … 

@evilgreenhag : 

I have a lot to teach you

you :

No thanks.

@evilgreenhag : 

And I find ballet annoying.

@evilgreenhag : 

Sorry not sorry, but I had one of my best naps when my high school teacher took us to the Opera. It’s just not my thing, but it’s cool if it’s yours. We can’t all dance the same thing.

@evilgreenhag replied to your text “no thanks.” :

rude.

you :

Only bc they took you to see incompetents.

you :

I wasn’t dancing at the Opera at that time, you old hag

you replied to “rude.” :

My pleasure.

@evilgreenhag replied to “ I wasn’t dancing at the Opera at that time, you old hag ” :

I’m only four years older than you, what are you talking about ?

@evilgreenhag : 

I see you’re still full of yourself.

you :

It’s still four years older, old hag.

you :

Sorry to know what I’m worth

@evilgreenhag : 

What happened to the clever girl ? Ready to stop calling me like that for old hag, kiddo ?

@evilgreenhag : 

What are you worth it then ?

you :

Who are you calling kiddo, bitch ?

you :

I’m worth more than all those incompetents who think they’re good enough only bc they’re fucking their way up.

Come see for yourself.

@evilgreenhag : 

Are you inviting me to one of your shows ?

you :

Not inviting, just suggesting it to you.

you :

Clever girl.

@evilgreenhag : 

We’ll see about that.

you :

Have you thought about what we talked about ?

@evilgreenhag : 

What did we talk about ?

you :

You’re serious rn ?

@evilgreenhag : 

I’m joking, Agatha. Damn girl you need to relax

@evilgreenhag : 

I haven’t thought about it since, and I thought you were not inviting me to your show

you :

Still not inviting you, I just want to know if you thought about my suggestion.

@evilgreenhag : 

You want me to come ?

you :

You do what you want, but you still need to see competent ballet dancers.

you :

Aka me, if it wasn’t clear for you brain, clever girl.

@evilgreenhag : 

I’ll think about it then.

@evilgreenhag : 

I’ll really think about it.

@evilgreenhag : 

Good news, I’m coming Friday to see you on scene. I expect you to be really good !

you :

I’m more than good honey.

you :

I’m excellent.

you :

People are just too blind to see my talent properly

@evilgreenhag : 

Well, let’s hope I’m not to blind then

@evilgreenhag : 

And that I won’t fall asleep 

you :

If you fall asleep, I swear to God, I’m killing you

@evilgreenhag : 

Bossy.

you :

You can’t fall asleep when I'm dancing, it’s rude.

@evilgreenhag : 

I warned you, remember ?

you :

I do clever girl

you :

But I’m expecting better from you

@evilgreenhag : 

Yes mam ! 

@evilgreenhag : 

If I fall asleep, you get to kill me. Happy ?

you :

Thrilled !

Friday came a little faster than Agatha had expected and she would be lying if she said she wasn’t excited to know what Rio will think about her show. Or the show. It wasn’t hers, never had been and that was a shame. She knew she deserved to be the lead part of that show, she was better than the lead herself and everyone knew it. Or they pretended they didn’t know it, playing blind when they knew nothing. 

Jenna was a great dancer, not good, not perfect and especially not exceptional. She didn’t have that thing that made a lead glow on the scene. She didn’t attract the spectators’ eyes, but everyone liked to pretend she did. Like she was the best of them and that’s why she always had the lead role since she got there. 

Her and Agatha arrived at the same time at the Opera, but Jenna was a little younger than her. Three years younger, insufferable and an oversized ego Agatha couldn’t tolerate anymore. Not that she actually did before. She never liked her since they met, never liked the impression she gave, like she was the next big revelation ballet will see. But Agatha felt nothing big and real watching her dance. Except for embarrassment. She felt embarrassed for her because she was just so sure to be the next big thing in dance history when she clearly wasn’t.

“Did you see her ? She’s incredible.” 

Two young dancers, new in the academy, were talking, whispering together while watching Jenna rehearsing her dances for the evening show. They were young, arrived a few weeks ago in the crew so they clearly didn’t know better. And they hadn’t seen Agatha really dance, otherwise, they wouldn’t be such doe eyes and amazed by Jenna’s absence of skills. 

“Yeah, no wonder she's been the lead since she came.” and a third dancer came into the conversation, making Agatha roll her eyes to oblivion. They clearly didn’t know what they were talking about. “No wonder she got the role of Odette.”

“I wish I could dance like her.” said the last one who hadn't talked yet, a little dreamy.

It was always like that when they were doing morning rehearsal for their show later the same day. People being amazed by Jenna inexistant talent and Agatha being half bothered, half embarrassed. And every time she wished something happened to Jenna so she could take her place as the good lead. Because Agatha, even if she had her own lead role in the show, she was the bad one. The one the executives didn’t put under the spotlight much. 

She was Odile, the bad one, the somber part of the show, the one meant to be hated by everyone because of her jealousy against Odette, the good and loved one. The one who wouldn't do something bad compared to Odile. 

The good and the bad at their finest, only because it was Swan Lake.

But Agatha wasn’t only the bad part of the Swan. She also was Jenna’s understudy when she couldn’t be here. Except, she was always here. Never sick, never injured. Like she was doing it on purpose so Agatha couldn’t take her place and shine like she deserved to.

Agatha was sure Jenna knew that she was better than her and that, if one day she happened to not be able to dance, she would lose her place. Agatha was waiting for that day to come, almost praying to whatever dance God who would listen to her to make that day come faster. 

“Hey kid !” because she couldn’t stand to hear them talk like this about Jenna, Agatha couldn’t do anything but step into their conversation with a little mischievous grin on her face. “Trust me you don’t want to be or dance like her. Don’t settle for mediocrity when you can go for perfection. Or at least what comes close to it for you because you don’t deserve perfection by thinking like that.”

Agatha was enjoying watching their face going white, their eyes losing the sparkle they had before and their smile fading. Not that she liked terrorising new dancers -even if she kinda liked it- but she liked more putting them into their right place, like they didn’t deserve to breathe the same air as her when they were happy with their mediocrity. Or with Jenna’s mediocrity as their goal.

“If you think that Jenna is the best dancer here, you know nothing about ballet and don’t deserve to be here right now.” she came closer to them, still grinning. “Who did you pay or with whom did you fuck so you could join the crew, huh ? Come on, don’t be shy, tell me. I won’t tell anyone, it will be our secret. I promise.” she was lying, she would tell everyone about that and do everything to fire them before the sun goes down. 

“Well well well …” Agatha knew that voice pretty well : Jenna. “Look who’s trying to scare the new blood.” knowing she was at the receiving end of those words, Agatha turned around, now facing her dearest rival. Tall, her hair turning slowly blonde, nice green eyes. She was great, not the prettiest, but she was great and maybe that was infuriating Agatha more. “Agatha Harkness, or the one who thinks she’s good enough to take my place but still hasn't done it after two years.” she could see Jenna faking holding back a laugh, something as fake as her breast. “Aren’t you tired by now ? Why don’t you put that energy somewhere else, huh ? Like in dancing, maybe like that you could finally beat me.” her smile was falsely kind. “Or not. Everyone knows I’m better than you, but you can’t see the truth that’s in front of your eyes.” 

“You ? Better than me ?” Agatha wasn’t holding back her laugh. She was laughing, hard, right at her face just to piss her off. “You can’t fool me, Jenna. I’m not dumb enough to think you’re anything close to me. I know I’m better and unlike you, I don’t need to sleep around to get a place somewhere. My talent brings me here and soon enough you’ll see what real talent is.”

“Oh my god. You’re crazier than I thought, Agatha.” a hand on her chest, faking being offended by the insinuations Agatha was making, but she knew she was right. She knew Jenna was sleeping around in the Opera, otherwise she wouldn’t be where she is now. “Thinking I’m need to fuck to be the lead. How sweet it is coming from you. Where would you be without your mother, Agatha ? Isn’t it thanks to her that you’re at the Opera ? Hasn’t she paid your way in with her connections ?” the mention of her mother just made Agatha more angry than she already was. “No wonder you got Odile’s role, she’s perfect for you.”

“Oh, Jenna, honey. You’re so sweet to think that my mom needs to use her connections to get me in the Opera.” 

Evanora Harkness wouldn’t do any of that for her daughter. Yes, she had paid for her to have the best teachers she could have, but that was the only thing she did when she was young. And it was only because she would get something at the end, even years later. Now Agatha had to work her ass off so she could pay her back for this. Because Evanora Harkness wasn’t doing something for free. Never. Not even for her daughter.

“You know I’m right, Jenna, and you’re scared because when people will stop being blind and see that I’m the most talented of us, you’ll be back to the shadows. Forgotten by those who put you blindlessly on a pedestal, taking you as their role model. But you’re nothing Jenna. You like to think you’re all like Odette and I’m like Odile, but we are nothing like them. You’re not as good as Odette is.” Agatha came closer to Jenna, still smirking. “Be careful, honey, the fall might be hard. I don’t want you to break one of your nails.”

And with one last smirk, Agatha turned on her heels and left the rehearsal, knowing perfectly all eyes were on her. She loved making her way out like that. Feeling every eye on her back, hearing the whispers starting once she was far enough to not hear them properly. 

Her rivalry with Jenna wasn’t unknown, far from it. They never hide the fact they hated each other and Agatha suspected some people to love it, even adding their own spice to their chaos. Some for pure jealousy, doing it in the hope to take their place one day. And some just because they loved it, the chaos, the hating. 

But the best at it were the executives, using their rivalry for the good being of the show. Never hesitating by using it more than they should. Their relationship had become a part of the story they were all telling to the public, but it wasn’t staged. It was all real. Every side glances, every insult the girls were whispering to the other. Everything was real.

Walking away, Agatha could still hear Jenna’s voice saying to the other dancers that she was purely jealous of her success. That she couldn’t bear not having the last word in an argument and Agatha barely cared about it most of the time. She was waiting for the day she could be at the front row to witness Jenna’s fall, hoping it would be so hard she’ll have to hide for at least a decade. But she wouldn’t mind if she could hide for more, maybe like a whole life ? 

Even if she was enjoying her little, not so little, bickering with Jenna, she really couldn’t stand her as the lead anymore. It wasn’t representative of the Opera she had wished to join when she first started to dance at four. 

Agatha had always seen it as the ultimate place dancers could work at, with prestigious shows, choreographers and more. The Opera was the best of the best for her ballet self, and letting Jenna be one of the faces of it ? It was too much, but two years had passed and nothing had changed yet. People were still putting her on a pedestal she didn’t deserve, playing dumb and pretending to be blind so they wouldn't put someone else in her place. 

It’s not like no one had tried to do it. Agatha could remember that man who had worked at the Opera last year. A new choreographer who had been chosen to organize a small show for Christmas. He had wanted to do things differently, more representative of his work and universe; he hoped he could mix it with the Opera. It had been his dream to work here, to do something special, but he had let his dreams talk for him instead of staying in the mold like every other choreographer before him. He was fired before the premiere, hell, even before the dancers had been all chosen. 

Why ? Because Jenna wasn’t going to be the lead. Agatha was his favorite for the role and people didn’t like it.

It was like, Jenna had to be the lead or the show won’t see the light of the day.

Since then, Agatha was sure something was happening behind closed doors, in the backstage. She didn’t have proof yet, but it was just a matter of time. She had to play it cool to finally find what she was looking for. But right now, time wasn’t at playing detective. Right now, Agatha had to find a way to put Jenna back where she belongs, in the shadows, before anything else. 

Rio was coming tonight to see Agatha dancing and because she had said she found ballet boring, she wanted to impress her, show her what ballet was. With her current bad role she could do that, but she knew being the good lead of tonight’s show would be better. Much better. 

Evanora had also decided to come tonight. It was a surprise at first, because her mother never came to her shows, unless there was something behind. It did. She had told Agatha she expected her to be perfect because she was coming with work partners and clients. And by being perfect, Agatha knew her mother expected her to finally be the main character : Odette. She hadn’t liked the fact that her daughter had been chosen to represent the evil part of Swan Lake. Evanora had hated it and made sure her daughter got the message, expecting her to make things change by talking to the choreographer or someone higher. 

Agatha did what her mother told her, but she still wasn’t the main character and Evanora still didn’t know about that.

She had no other choice but to find a way to bench Jenna for the night, and she had an idea in mind. Something she was thinking about for some time, but never done it before. Tonight was the night to do it.

Jenna had the habit of having a weird green drink before every show. Something she put a daily command for so she could drink it while getting ready. Strange habit, but enough to give Agatha ideas to sabotage her rival. One vomiting pill in her drink before she got it and all Agatha had to do was to wait for the effects to happen. It was simple enough she was sure even a kid could do it easily. 

All she had to do was to not drag attention to her when she was backstage, wandering around with a bottle of water, pretending to ponder if she wanted or not a cookie one of the new faces of the crew brought for his first show. A good luck charm he said, making Agatha laugh at him behind his back.

She never believed in something like a good luck charm, not with Evanora Harkness as a mother who only believed in hard work that it consumes every other past time you can have in your life. And her mother had implanted her ideas in Agatha’s mind at a young age. 

“Hungry ? Or looking for some luck for tonight’s show ?”

Turning her head to see who was talking to her, Agatha’s eyes locked into Nathan's, the one who had brought the cookies and whom Agatha was sure had a crush on her. 

“Just a little hungry, yes.” she simply said, grabbing one of the cookies without looking much at it before taking a bite of it. 

“Hope you’ll like it ! Good luck for tonight then.” he simply nodded at her, smiling before turning on his heels and leaving her alone in the room they used for breaks and coffee machines. 

She didn’t need luck, Agatha was good. The only thing she needed was for Jenna to not be able to dance for the night to be perfect and she knew what she needed to do for it to happen.

Once Nathan was out, leaving her finally alone in the room, Agatha let the cookie fall on the table. She wasn’t hungry and surely didn’t need a cookie with too much sugar a few hours before the show. The last thing she needed was to be high on sugar or to look puffy because of it.

So instead of leaving the room to get ready, she grabbed one of the drinks on the table; the weirdly green one she knew was meant for Jenna. It was already here, as always, four hours before the show started. 

Not that she wanted to drink it, far from it. She only took it, so she could put one of her vomiting pills she took from her bag in the changing room inside. Those she usually took when she felt like she ate too much at lunch on a show day and needed to feel good for the night. 

She needed Jenna out for tonight only, her who was never absent for a show and the last thing Agatha needed was for it to look suspect. Hurting her was off limits, she wasn’t that desperate to do something that extreme. Plus, she needed for tonight to pass for an accident, not to arouse suspicion. All she needed was for Jenna to feel just enough bad she wouldn’t be able to step on the scene, leaving Agatha the place to do it for her. 

‘Only for the good of the show’ she said to herself, a grin on her face, already enjoying too much to see her rival in a bad shape. 

Before anyone came in and witnessed Agatha putting her plan into work ; she quickly broke the capsule over the green drink to release the powder she needed. Then, she stirred the drink and the emetic together so the pill could dissolve enough so no one could notice anything. Especially Jenna.

Usually, Agatha only took the pill with a glass of water and it was done, but if she wanted Jenna to take it without noticing, she needed to put more effort into it. To hide the emetic in her drink so she could drink it before she could start to feel the effect of the vomiting pill. 

Once it was mixed enough together, Agatha put the glass back from where she took it before leaving the room like she had done nothing more than eat something. Agatha walked to join the staff so they could do her hair and make up for tonight. Now the show could begin, she was ready for everything.

Agatha was sitting in a chair, facing a mirror waiting for Sharon, the hair stylist, to take care of her for tonight when her phone buzzed on her lap. While she was expecting a text from the staff telling her Jenna was out and she had to take her place, she was surprised to see it was a text from Rio that was waiting for her.

@evilgreenhag : 

I’m getting ready to leave my apartment. Hope I won’t regret coming tonight.

you :

You’re acting like I forced you.

@evilgreenhag : 

You kinda did

you :

I did not !

@evilgreenhag : 

Kidding honey, I’m just messing with you.

you :

You lesbians have a really bad humor.

@evilgreenhag : 

Good thing that I’m bi then ;)

Rio could say a hundred times she wasn’t a lesbian, Agatha was still sure she really was and was still in the closet -if a bi girl could somehow still be considered in the closet. 

“Is it your boyfriend that makes you smile like that ?” was what made Agatha look away from her phone, her eyes big turning to look at Sharon who was getting to do her hair.

“What ?”

“You’re looking at your phone all smiley. Is it because of your boyfriend ? I don’t remember his name.”

“Seren ?” she said in a scoff. In the two years Sharon had been doing her hair, she had learned about Agatha’s love life, sometimes despite her. “I broke up with him last week, he sure won’t make me smile anymore, not that I was particularly smiling.”

“Why that ? Why did you break up with him ?”

“I discovered he had a second girlfriend.” her voice was cold, but low so the news won’t spread too much in the crew. The last thing Agatha wanted was for Jenna to hear about it by someone else. She didn’t want to give her any juicy gossip about herself. Listening to her talking about her mother was already enough.

“What a bastard !” Agatha couldn’t help but laugh at Sharon’s words. It was pretty unusual to hear her swearing like that. Even when she was pissed at some dancers showing up late to do their hair or when dancers cut their hair so short she couldn’t do her job properly. 

“Agatha ?” came a man’s voice from the door before she could even think of answering to Sharon. “Oh Agatha, thank god you’re here !” 

She fought the urge to ask who he was when she saw the look on his face : a mix of something like despair and urgency. She simply arched an eyebrow, looking at him through the mirror, urging him to speak.

“Have you seen Jenna ? Do you know where she is or where she could be ?” his voice was trembling, showing the urge he must feel in this moment when their lead seemed to be missing.

“How on earth would I know where she is ? I don’t care about what she’s doing. Why ?”

“She hasn’t shown up yet in make-up and we can’t find her. We tried to call her but she’s not responding to her phone.”

“I don’t know where she is, sorry.” maybe you should check the bathroom , was what she wanted to say, but didn’t. 

And the man only left the room after that, muttering something Agatha could barely hear -not that she cared. She had to bite her lips so she wouldn’t smile and blow her cover. People couldn’t find out she did something, even as childish as putting a vomiting pill in a drink could possibly be. 

All Agatha needed was to be the lead for the night, not to be bench or something.

Now, all she had to do was to wait. Wait for people to find Jenna in a bathroom or for her to finally call back the Opera’s staff to tell them she couldn’t be here tonight. She could try to come, try to dance even with nausea, but she couldn’t ignore it all night and danced like nothing was happening. Jenna wasn’t going to risk any accident to happen on stage.

Agatha would have her night, her night to shine on scene, to show to every person what real talent was and that it wasn’t what any bullshit Jenna was making them believe in. She couldn’t wait to do it.

“Agatha ?” 

It was half of an hour later, when Agatha was already sitting in front of Sharon for her hair when she got interrupted again. But this time, the look of the man standing by the door was almost apologetic. It made her smile internally, already having an idea about what it was all about.

“Mmh ?”

“We need you to replace Jenna for tonight’s show.” here it was. The golden words were finally spoken to her and it was harder for her not to let her lips stretch into a smile. “We really can’t find Jenna, she’s not answering her phone and time is running out now. You have to replace her as Odette, and we can get your understudy for Odile tonight. She’s already on her way.” Agatha could see in his eyes that this change of plans wasn’t what they would want, those who only wanted Jenna as the lead. But if she wasn’t there, Agatha had to step in. That was the rule. 

“Oh my, I hope she’s fine.” feigning to be worried with a hand on her chest and a look of sympathy in her eyes ; Agatha could have become an actress instead of a ballet dancer. “I’ll do it, can’t give up on the show. Like we say, the show must go on.” she said after a few seconds of silence, like she had been pondering what she should do.

The man nodded and briefly thanked her before leaving the two women at what they were doing.

“Let’s get you ready for your new role then !” Sharon was almost as happy as Agatha was, still trying not to grin too much to look suspicious, but not smiling , even a little would be strange too. 

Agatha spent the next twenty minutes letting Sharon fuss with her hair, slicking it back into a rather high bun, as always. For Swan Lake, all the girls had the same hairstyle, it was only the few jewels or tiara they slipped into the hair that changed with  the role. 

Usually, for her black swan role Agatha had a black crown with pearls like diamond on it, placed on top of her head. It was beautiful, shiny and perfect with the black mask the makeup artist put on her face. She was dark for Odile, needed to be the representation of something dark and bad. Something, someone, more human.

For Odile’s role, Agatha got a white headband, like swan wings, that perfectly framed her face with a small crown on top. It was brighter, attracting more light than her black swan tiara. Everything was made so Jenna, the white swan, got all the lights and eyes were on her. 

She was the representation of the good, she had to be loved by everyone. 

Tonight, Agatha had to be the white swan, she had to be Odette. Not just to show people what she had in her, what talent was and because she was way better than Jenna. Not to show to Rio what ballet truly was. She needed to be Odette, to be the ballerina everyone loved so her mother could finally look her in the eyes without being ashamed and telling her how much of a disappointment Agatha was to her. Not that she was chasing for a congratulations -or anything that looked like it- not to hear her mother say how proud of her she was -not that she would say no to hear it at least one time. 

It was only because she needed to be good for once. 

Evanora Harkness : 

Glad to hear you’re finally the lead. Don’t mess it up, I’m coming with great company. I don’t want you to make me look bad in front of them. 

Evanora Harkness : 

And don’t eat before your show or you’ll look all puffy on scene. You can’t look puffy tonight, you have an image to maintain. 

Evanora Harkness : 

Try to do it for once.

It was the kind of encouragement Evanora was giving to her daughter every time she was coming to one of her shows -not that she came a lot. But she was right, Agatha couldn’t look bad or mess up tonight, not with Rio here, nor with her mother’s work partners here too. 

It was important for her not to mess up and to be perfect. 

She had to if she wanted to drag Jenna to the shadows where she truly belonged. 

Agatha had to be under the spotlight. She had to be on stage, in front of everyone so they could all see her properly. She had to show her talent, show what real dance was so things could go back to normal again. 

She had to and she couldn’t mess with it. 

“You’re the best, you got this.” she encouraged herself, looking at her reflection in the mirror in front of her. 

Agatha was back in the changing room, alone now that everyone had left to finish to get ready. She was looking at herself, looking at the white outfit that framed her body, highlighting her curves. She had dreamed of wearing it since the Opera had first talked about the show, teasing the dancers with what they had at that time so they could get ready for the auditions to come. She had dreamed of wearing it and feeling powerful with all this white on her. But now that she had it on her, now that she was looking at her reflection, she could feel something was off. She was thrilled, she was happy, but she didn’t feel that power she had always imagined she would feel wearing the outfit of a lead like Odette.

She was looking at herself, but she didn’t like what she saw. 

The body of someone who had neglected herself, fell for too much temptation. Someone who had eaten much more than what she should have. And Agatha thought about that cookie she had eaten earlier, regretting instantly the only bite she’d take. With everything else she had eaten the days before, it was too much, she could see it on her body. How her belly looked in her bodysuit. How the weight she had gained looked in her white costume. 

It wasn’t like when she wore her black bodysuit, she couldn’t see it clearly, could easily ignore the weight she had gained. But Odette’s white bodysuit didn’t allow her not to see it. It was all she could see when she looked at her in the mirror. 

What people in the room would think of her looking like that in the costume ? 

She had to be on top. She had to be perfect if she wanted to beat Jenna. 

“It’s okey, Agatha. It’s okey.” her voice was shaking, just like her hands that she couldn’t stop trying to smooth the fabric of the bodysuit on her stomach. Maybe she could make it disappear just by smoothing it away ?

She did try like it was possible in any way. It was the only thing she found herself capable of doing while looking at her reflection. But the more she looked at herself, the more she hated herself. Agatha hated the way she looked right now -or in general-, she hated how the white bodysuit and tutu emphasized her curves. She couldn’t hide her extra kilo, the one she couldn’t help noticing. The one her mother would surely see from her seat in the theater, even if she was far away from the scene. She would see it. 

Because she couldn’t stand her own reflection, she walked to the bathroom -no, she almost ran to the bathroom-, her hands still shaking and the image of her body with extra weight, looking bad in her bodysuit engraved in her mind. She couldn’t step on the scene looking like that, not if she wanted to take the lead for the next representation of Swan Lake or even for the next show that would come soon. 

Her body was moving on its own, her mind was elsewhere, focused on the vision of her own reflection in the mirror, on the image that her own body sent back to her. The look of disgrace, the look of someone who had neglected herself too much. She was disgusted by her own body, she couldn’t stand it anymore. 

Thankfully she was alone in the restroom, everyone was too occupied elsewhere to notice Agatha locking herself in one of the stalls, kneeling in front of the toilet and losing herself with her demons. One of her hands was on the wall in front of her, giving her some sort of balance while the other was lost between her mouth and the toilet. 

It was just her. Her and her noises that filled the room. If anyone was coming to the restroom, there would be no doubt about what was happening in one of the stalls. Even hiding behind the closed door, anyone could guess that someone was in there, fingers deep into their throat, emptying themselves in search for some inner peace, for something to make them feel fine. 

Or the illusion of making peace with themselves. 

It wasn’t the best, but it was all Agatha could do to feel a little better. Even if, once she was out of the stall, any traces of what she’s been doing long gone, she still couldn’t stand her own reflection. Her eyes were glassy, a little red because of the tears that had filled her eyes, falling on her cheeks when she was trying to get rid of the cookie. Of that one bite she had taken, but it was one bite too many. The one she shouldn’t have taken, among so many others. 

Resting her hands on the edge of the sink, Agatha was watching the water flow, escaping through the drains, letting the sound it made calm her senses. She was still shaking a little, but nothing compared to before, when she was in the changing room.

In a quick and simple gesture, Agatha collected water in her hands, lightly sprinkling her neck and nape. She couldn’t spray her face, even if she was dying to do it. But she couldn’t ruin her makeup before the beginning of the show. Not when she did put all that effort to be the lead tonight. One step in the wrong direction and she was done.

“Oh fuck” made Agatha jump a little from where she was, still resting against the sink, the head down. “Sorry, I didn’t think some would be here. You okey ?” 

“Perfect !” she didn’t know if she said to convince herself or the dancer who just entered the restroom. “I was just leaving anyway.”

In a few steps she was at her height in front of the door. Agatha only had to reach out to grab the handle so she could finally escape the restroom before the young woman could notice the cracks in her composure. 

“Agatha, wait.” it was enough for her to freeze in place, her hand up in the air, waiting for the dancer to keep talking. “Bob is looking for you. He might be near the changing room, I saw him there.”

“Who ?” who the fuck was Bob ?

“Bob, he said he asked you to replace Jenna. He wants to talk to you, maybe about tonight’s show. Some directives about the change or something. I didn’t ask, sorry.”

So Bob was his name. 

“Ok, thanks.” 

With one last barely here smile, Agatha left the restroom and headed for the changing room to see that Bob guy. What was needed to talk about ? It wasn’t like she didn’t know what she had to do. She already did . She knew what she had to do, knew the dances where Odette was. If he was scared Agatha might screw up, he clearly didn’t know her, but Agatha Harkness never screwed up on scene. 

Once she was in the changing room, there was no sight of Bob or of any men per say. Agatha was alone, again, having to face the mirror in front of the door where she stood, stoic. She could still see the traces of her tears, still feel her bodysuit clawing on her, like it was too much on her body.

“Oh my god, so they were not lying. You were ready to replace me.” 

Jenna.

How could she be here ? Standing in a corner of the room in jogging pants and a sports bra, hair and makeup already done for tonight.

“Jenna ?” even if she was a good liar, Agatha couldn’t hide all the surprise she felt by seeing her rival perfectly fine. 

“Surprised to see me ?”

“They said they couldn’t find you and that you didn’t answer her phone. They couldn’t wait for you to finally appear.” if only she had never reappeared. She shouldn’t be here. She should be crawling in her apartment, trying to join the toilet before it was too late. “Where were you ?”

“None of your business Harkness. Now give me my costume back, I have to get ready. So do you. I think you have a whole makeup to redo.” 

Her smirk. Her mischievous smirk that Agatha dreamt about erasing from her face. 

“You’re late Jenna, are they really letting you dance knowing that ?”

“Of course they do. They need me.”

“They have me. I’m better than you Jenna and you know it.” 

“Are you ?” this time, Jenna wasn’t even trying to hide her laugh. She laughed right at Agatha’s face, only making her more angry. She didn’t want to leave her place, not tonight, not when she needed it the most. Tonight was supposed to be her night. “You’re funny Agatha, but now give me my costume back. They want me to be Odette tonight, like I’m supposed to do. I am Odette , you’re only Odile.”

Agatha was ready to punch her in the face. If her plan hadn’t worked, maybe a punch could do it.

“Oh Agatha here you are ! I have to talk to you about-” but Bob’s voice stopped her in her tracks. “I see you’ve seen Jenna. I wanted to tell you she was back, so everything’s back to normal now. We need you back with Odile.” 

“What ? But the show starts in an hour and I’m already ready for Odette like you asked me.”

“I know and I’m sorry, but Jenna’s back now. We can’t ask her to go home when she’s here.”

“Right Agatha, I can’t go home.” 

“I’m sorry but you have to hurry Agatha. Captain’s order, we do it like every other night. Jenna as Odette and you as Odile.”

Even if she wasn’t looking at her, Agatha could still feel Jenna smiling behind her. All too happy with what was happening in front of her ; Agatha’s hopes falling. 

It was over. Agatha didn’t have any other choice but to change because she knew she couldn’t keep fighting to keep Odette’s role for tonight. She wanted to, but she couldn’t be the reason for the late start of the show. She wouldn’t hear the end of it and would surely pay for it. Maybe be benched for a couple of shows and that would be worse than anything. 

“They’re waiting for you for your makeup, I’ll tell them you’ll be here in five minutes.” was the last thing Bob said before closing the door behind him, leaving Jenna and Agatha alone in the changing room. 

“Told you they needed me.”

“They’re making a mistake and I’ll prove it to them. Enjoy your lead while you can Jenna, but soon I’ll prove to them how good I am and they finally open their eyes about you. They’ll finally see how mediocre you are.” she said before locking herself in a fitting room. 

Agatha was mad, she was furious to see all her efforts went for nothing. She couldn’t understand how Jenna could be so fine when she had put a vomiting pill in her drink. A drink she always drank before a show. She couldn’t have put it in the wrong one because there was only one green drink and it was Jenna’s. It always had been for two years. How could she be able to dance after drinking it ? Agatha knew the effect of those pills, she had more than one after too many lunches or when she just gained too much weight she needed to lose it. 

“I hope you didn't ruin my outfit. Can’t believe they made you wear mine.” Jenna said once Agatha was out, back in her shorts and top. She didn’t care much to answer her, already heading to the door. “Did you hear about Sam ?”

“Who ?” once again, Agatha didn’t turn to look at Jenna, but she could hear her sigh at her antics.

“Sam, a new dancer in the crew. They said he grabbed something to drink earlier and ended up sick.”

“Do you think I care ? Bad for him, he shouldn’t have been drinking before a show.”

“But it wasn’t alcohol. I went to grab my drink but it wasn’t there. Apparently he didn’t know it was mine and drank it.”

“So you’re saying that you’re the one who made him sick. No wonder with this strange green drink.”

“It’s a green juice and it’s good for your body, maybe you should try it someday.”

“Not now that I know it made Sam sick.”

“It’s not supposed to make someone sick, someone sabotage it. Someone tried to sabotage me.”

And Agatha could only laugh. She was laughing hard, holding herself with one hand on the door. It wasn’t the time to blow her cover.

“You’re funny Jenna, really.”

“I’m serious Agatha and I know it’s you.” her voice was hard, pointing to Agatha with her finger to add more weight to her accusation. 

“Me ?” Agatha laughed harder only so she could blow off her cover.

“Yes you ! I don’t have any proof, but I know it’s you. It must be you, seeing how jealous you are of me.”

“Me ? Jealous of you ?” Agatha wasn’t jealous, she was mad that people thought Jenna was the best when she was right there. “I’m not jealous of you because I know I’m better than you. There’s nothing about you to be jealous of.” she spat in her face. 

“I’ll prove it Harkness, you’ll see.”

“Like I’ll prove to everyone that I’m better than you ?” she laughed one last time, turning back to the door, ready to leave. “But unlike you, I can do it. Good luck finding anything about that, you’ll need it.” 

Without waiting for more from Jenna, Agatha left the room, heading to the makeup artist that was waiting for her. 

She knew Jenna had nothing against her to make her point. It was only her words against hers and without proof it would be harder to prove Agatha had put something in her drink. Even if it was the truth and they both knew it. 

She hadn’t said her last word. She wasn’t done yet.

“Heard there was a change of plans, again ?” 

When she sat in the chair to redo her makeup, Agatha had already put a mask on her face. Hiding everything she could feel behind a fake smile but a real confidence. She couldn’t show them how broken she could be inside, how angry she was to see Jenna back and still as the lead even knowing she wasn’t supposed to be here tonight. She was supposed to spend her night sitting next to her toilet, emptying her stomach until the next morning. But there was one thing Agatha couldn’t stop thinking about. 

Where was Jenna all this time ?

She knew her rival, they were the same hardworking girl. Only Agatha was the one who improved with her hard work, Jenna wasn’t near her. What wasn’t right for her was the fact that the lead dancer was MIA for a long time. Much more than necessary. It was strange coming from her. Her who hadn’t missed one show in two years. Jenna who always was in the theater when there was a show coming. 

Always there, always aware of anything before everyone. 

Agatha had always been sure Jenna was fucking around the Opera to have her place secure. She only saw it as possible to explain why she always had the lead role instead of her. Without sleeping with someone high in the hierarchy, Jenna wouldn’t always be the lead since she arrived, not with Agatha next to her. 

She knew people couldn’t be so blind. She had seen it with the choreographer they had fired when he said he wanted Agatha as the lead of his show. Someone must have been behind it, pulling the strings. 

Jenna was sleeping with someone in the Opera, Agatha was sure of that, but she didn’t have proof to make her point. But she knew she was right, she was just waiting for the right time for it. For the truth to come to her. And it did.

Tonight the truth came slowly to her. If Jenna was missing all this time they had to ask Agatha to replace her before turning back, it was because of her sweet and secret boyfriend. 

Agatha was sure, Jenna was fucking when everyone was looking for her. 

“Back to the old Odile then ?!” said the makeup artist, bringing back Agatha from her thoughts. 

“Back to the old Odile.” she nodded with a fake smile on her face.

Agatha wasn’t particularly excited to go on scene. Not anymore. 

@evilgreenhag : 

Waiting outside. Break a leg psycho ;) 

Agatha was back at being excited to go on scene and dance. After all, she had to prove something to someone and tonight she will be the best Odile she ever was. 

Just for Rio, her clever girl.