Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The sun was so bright it made everything feel a little hazy, it was hot and everyone was feeling it. Jackie's backyard had become a common hangout from the team. It was filled with various scents: sunscreen, chlorine, sweaty teens. Somehow Misty was in charge of music, the speakers played a nineties pop song that she insisted was going to make a comeback. The pool was cold, the blue water shined slightly under the sun and a half-empty can of coke was tipped over on the concrete.

Jackie was perched on the edge of a lounge chair, she wore a white bikini that Nat swore made her look ten times more beautiful. Nat was watching her from the pool, her arms resting on the edge, head on her hand, she was enamored. But she was trying not to be too obvious about it

However, Jackie never missed anything. She caught Nat staring as she usually did. She offered a girl of her head and her signature smile, the one that was smug and made Nat want to look away but she didn't.

"Hi," Jackie calls out from the chair, she shoots Nat another smile, "are you gonna watch me from there all day or come join me"

Nat whines softly before responding, "it's like a billion degrees out there" she sighs, "and Lottie took my seat"

"didn't know you claimed it" Lottie teases as she lays on the lounge chair, eyes closed behind her sunglasses. Nat just let out a small sigh before making her way out of the pool. Tai cannon balled into the deep end, resulting in Nat's hair getting wet. She turns around to shoot a sharp glare at the girl, tai sticks her arms up.

Van, who was dripping with water having just cannonballed as well, runs past Shauna who was reading a book. "Van what the hell" Shauna groans, "my book"

"Who brings a book to the pool" Van teases before heading off to jump back into the pool, Shauna simply rolls her eyes and tries to dry the pages. As Nat gets out the pool she laughs at the scene. "Jackie's reading a magazine" she adds on.

Jackie arches her brow at her, "now you're paying attention" she laughs, Nat rolls her eyes as she stands in front of Jackie. In a split second Jackie grabs Nat and pulls her down onto her lap. Nat lets out a soft giggle as she lays chest to chest with Jackie on the chair. "You wanted me out of the water to be closer" Nat mutters.

"Maybe" Jackie grinned, wrapping her arms around Nat tighter. This felt right, it was right.

Nat let out a content sigh, her heart does a soft fluttery thing that happens when she's with Jackie a lot, she tries to ignore it. She wasn't supposed to do fluttery or soft. Nat was the girl who wore ripped jeans, band tees, she smiled behind the gas station for crying out loud. Nat was anything but soft.

Jackie did not agree with that, she thought Nat was the softest thing ever. Though she didn't always say it because Nat would give her a glare.

"You're lucky I like you" Nat says, quiet, not quite teasing but loving.

Jackie leans in and kisses the corner of her mouth. "I know"

Behind them, Shauna lets out an exaggerated ugh, "Get a room"

Nat smirks not bothering to respond to the banter happening behind them. She was very content just lying on Jackie. She closes her eyes, taking it all in. A small breath leaving her mouth. Jackie was warm, soft, and gentle.

Shauna rolls her eyes but doesn't comment any further on the scene. Lottie watches over the rim of her sunglasses and smiles like she's in on something. Though perhaps it was just the fact that she was proud the two of them were still going strong. Lottie had practically gotten Nat to ask Jackie out.

In the background, Tai and Van are trying to dunk each other again, there was a lot of splashing and diving going on. While Misty was trying to make sure they weren't going to get hurt, she worried too much.

The day was good, Nat would take this as a win. It was often difficult to find time to have actual fun, when her mom was always making life difficult. But here in Jackie's lap, her wet hair sticking to her shoulder, her friends in the back, this is what Nat needed.

Though Nat would never say it out loud, not with anyone but Jackie around, she loved this. The chaos, the heat, the noise. Jackie turns and kisses Nat's head, brief and perfect. A moment between just them.

"Softie," she whispers, a small laugh.

Nat huffs. "Whatever."

But she doesn't move away, she stays there for a while.

Chapter Text

When Jackie had first asked Nat out she didn't want their date to be something typical. She wanted to do something the two of them already enjoyed doing together. Not going to the movies or to dinner, but something that was them. She settled on a picnic, in the park across the street from Jackie's house. The grass was soft and it was usually quiet.

That afternoon the two of them spread the blanket out on the grass, the sun was soft. Jackie kicked off her sandals by the edge of the blanket while Nat dropped her jacket.

"Is this good" Jackie asked as she glanced at Nat who was standing awkwardly by the blanket. She gave a small shrug as she held onto the brown paper bag that held the sandwiches she made that morning.

"Yeah, it's good" she answered, taking a seat on the blanket next to Jackie. She left a little bit of room, it was clear she was a little hesitant or unsure.

It was quite for a bit, not awkward, Jackie smiled. That same smile that Nat hadn't been able to stop thinking about for the last few days. The one that made her feel all weird on the inside of she thought about it for too long.

"So" Jackie started, "our first official date"

Nat gave a small shrug in response before replying, "feels a little unofficial" she admitted. Perhaps it was just because she couldn't believe that the Jackie Taylor had asked her out, her of all people. The two were on the same soccer team and had several classes together, they saw eachother often. But this, this felt different.

"No" Jackie spoke, taking her sunglasses off to make eye contact with Nat, "feels like you think im gonna change my mind"

Nat blinked, shrugging again. Something she did often when she didn't have the words. She opened her mouth like she was going to say something before she closed it again. Jackie didn't say anything, just reached for the basket she brought. She pulled out a sandwich, then handed it to Nat.

"Turkey and cheese" she smiled, "no tomatoes because you're wierd" she teased. Nat smirked before taking the sandwich.

"It's a texture thing" Nat explained, but Jackie got it. She always got it.

"I know, I remember" and that made Nat smile. She takes a breath before opening the brown paper bag she brought, taking out a sandwich and handing it to Jackie. "Ham, cheese, and turkey"

"You remembered too" Jackie smiled, taking the sandwich, letting her fingers brush Nat's for a second too long.

For a while it was just quiet, the two eating their sandwiches. A comfortable silence that didn't make Nat want to pull her hair out. Jackie finished her sandwich, wiping her hands on a napkin before pulling out a container, holding it out to Nat, "Peaches"

"Did you slice those" Nat teased, mouth still chewing a piece of her sandwich.

"Hey you say that like you think im not capable" Jackie laughed, Nat loved it. It was her favorite sound, she could never get over it.

"You said it like it was a flex" Nat takes the container, opening it and smirking.

"Well I did slice them, I even cut them perfectly" Jackie informed. Nat liked that about Jackie, the way she strove for perfection. Never settling for less than, besides with Nat she thought. She took a peach from the container before putting it in her mouth. It tasted good, maybe it was just because Jackie prepared them.

"You're staring" she said, as she glanced at Jackie.

"You're just cute" Jackie grinned.

"You can't just say that" Nat said, her face becoming flushed. She could feel her hands become a little sweaty. Jackie made her nervous.

"I can, I will" Jackie smiled, "it's a date"

Nat didn't reply for a while, she just sat there, looking back at Jackie. She hesitated a little before scooting closer, leaning against Jackie's shoulder. Jackie easily wrapped her arm around Nat, holding her close, keeping her close.

"You okay" she asked softly, Jackie was always soft with Nat.

Nat nodded. "Just getting used to being wanted"

"I want you" Jackie started, "all of you. The loud, quiet, weird, even the tomato hating part"

Nat looked up, lip quivering slightly.

"We'll figure this out together" Jackie spoke like this was the simplest thing. Nat reached up and tucked a piece of Jackie's hair behind her ear. This was nice, Jackie was nice.

Chapter Text

Jackie's living room always smelt like a different flower, Jackie's mom was always burning candles. This time it smelt like roses. Nat enjoyed the scent of this one, it reminded her of her childhood, back before things got hard.

Lottie was stretched out across the carpeted floor of Jackie's bedroom. She was shuffling the uno deck, it was easy for her. Anytime Nat did it the cards just bent and it would send Shauna into a fit. Shauna was sat next to Lottie, her back against Jackie's bed. While Nat was leaning her weight into Jackie's side, she had one knee tucked up. Nat let her fingers gently hook around the hem of Jackie's sweater, something she did often when she wanted to be close.

"Are we doing teams or just going for it" Lottie asked as she finished shuffling the cards into one deck, raising an eyebrow.

"All in, no teams. Going ruthless" Shauna smirked, she was ready to beat them.

"Always" Nat had added, her voice soft and quiet like usual. She pressed herself closer to Jackie, who never minded.

Jackie smiled at Nat, wrapping her arm around her, "if you want to sit on my lap babe, you should just do it" she teased.

Nat's face got a little red, the blush creeping up on her cheeks. She shook her head and stayed out next to Jackie, though she'd probably be on Jackie's lap later. For now she was content. Nat grabbed Jackie's hand, lacing their fingers together and then unlacing them. She traced the edge of Jackie's fingernails and rubbed her fingers over her skin. Jackie again never minded, she thought it was cute.

"I'm gonna win" Shauna smirked, cutting into the moment as Lottie sealed everyone seven cards. Nat just rolled her eyes and took her cards.

"You say that every time" lottie laughed, "you like rarely win"

"Well im manifesting" Shauna smiled, "you of all people should respect that"

That caused Nat to snort, "you guys are all gonna manifest to not be taken out by me"

Jackie laughed, nudging Nat's thigh, "already trash talking"

The first few rounds were just classic chaos. Shauna forgot to say uno twice, got penalized both times. Lottie kept stacking draw two cards that would always hit Nat. Frustration was heavy in the air. Jackie kept changing the color. When the third round was ending, Jackie had saved her wild card until the last moment and then won the game with her signature sweet smile.

"You are such a menace" Nat smiled, no heat behind her words, she just nudged Jackie's leg with her own.

"Yeah but you like that about me" Jackie smiled, and Nat would never deny that.

When they hit somewhere around round six things got a bit quieter, less messy. Jackie had put on a mellow playlist she made for Nat when she was feeling sad. Nat ended up migrating into Jackie's lap. Shauna had started to do a little better now that Jackie was more distracted.

When Nat shifts slightly in Jackie's lap she looks down at her, she can tell Nat is getting bored of uno.

"You okay" Jackie asked, her voice low that Shauna and Lottie couldn't hear. She rubbed her hand on Nat's thigh.

Nat blinked, her card mid-lift, eyes slightly unfocused, "yeah, just tired"

Jackie smiled and nodded, her hand still rubbing Nat's thigh as she dropped her card onto the deck. She had the least amount left and was on the way to winning. "You're being extra cute tonight"

Nat felt her face heat up at the comment. Lottie cleared her throat before speaking, "Nat your distracting Jackie"

"Yeah come on she just played a blue seven on green four" Shauna laughed.

Nat sighed before throwing down a skip card on the pile, effectively skipping Lottie.

Later that night, they had stopped playing uno a while ago now. Shauna had begun doing some writing while Lottie was organizing her tarot card deck. Jackie smiled at Nat who was still in her lap

Hey" Jackie spoked "I like when you're here"

"Where" Nat asked, a little confused.

"With me" Jackie explained, "or in my lap"

Nat smiled, it always reached her eyes when she was with Jackie. She never needed to fake it. "I like me here too"

Chapter Text

It had been a year since the Yellowjackets had been rescued from the wilderness. A year since either Jackie or Nat had seen each other. The two ended up in the same therapy center a few months ago, both doing better. The two of them had noticed the other in a group session when Jackie sat across from Nat and their eyes met. Nat had given Jackie her phone number on a napkin before walking off, Jackie had texted and they agreed to meet up a few days later.

The sun was spilling through the windows of the cafe, the light was warm and a honey shade that made everything feel a little better. Jackie fiddled with the edge of her iced coffee lid, her eyes flicked to the door every few seconds. Nat was late, which wasn't a surprise and if anything was more on brand for her. Though it still managed to feel like a personal attack. Jackie honestly wasn't sure why she had said yes to his. Nat had texted her, out of nowhere really, not really a greeting just; "you around" and that was it. Jackie's stomach had flipped like it had before the crash, when they were still going in person to high school. She didn't know what this was, a catch up or an apology or was it a date? Jackie didn't know.

The thought of this being a date made her blush, which annoyed her. She did not get flustered over Natalie Scatorccio, not anymore.

The bell rang when the door to the cafe opened, Jackie looked up and pretended she hadn't been waiting long. When her eyes finally caught sight of Nat she gasped. Nat looked..better, softer almost. Her hair was longer, in two messy braids but her hair was still bleached unlike when they got rescued it had gone back to the dark brown it naturally was. Jackie smiled slightly when she noticed the way Nat's eyeliner was still smudged, and somehow that made her look the same. The same as when she saw her last in the wilderness, the same when she saw her before the wilderness. It was Nat, just Nat.

When she watched Nat walk closer, Jackie couldn't help but notice there was something lighter in Nat's walk, like she wasn't carrying as many ghosts. Jackie sat up a little straighter when Nat finally reached the table, "You're twenty minutes late"

"Yeah" Nat grinned, unapologetic. "And you're still here, so"

Jackie rolled her eyes but fought a smile. "Barely." she laughed, but she wasn't mad. Nat slid into the seat across from Jackie, a little awkward but that was on brand for Nat too. "you look good" Nat said, her face a little red after she spoke, "like for someone who used to yell at me when I wore my combat boots to practice" she added on.

Jackie smirked, "that's because they weren't regulation" she smiled, "but thanks, you look less haunted"

"High praise" Nat laughed, it was soft and still made Jackie's heart beat faster.

They fell into silence after that, the kind that used to stretch between them in the woods sometime when everyone else was asleep and the fire had burned low and the sky was full of stars they'd never asked for. There had always been a strange closeness between them, even then. Like they were on opposite ends of a string no one else could see.

Jackie took a sip of her drink. "So why'd you really text me" she asked, still unsure what this meet up was.

Nat shrugged. "Felt like it"

Jackie raised an eyebrow. Nat wasn't really great at giving answers that took confusion away, most the time Jackie felt like when Nat spoke things got more confusing but she waited, like she always would.

Nat sighed after a few minutes. "Okay. I don't know. I was thinking about you and how I missed you but I didn't know what to say". Jackie smiled softly, she had missed Nat too.

"I missed you too" Jackie's eyes met Nat's before Nat looked away again. "I'm glad you texted"

"Yeah?" Nat said, quieter. For some reason Nat still felt a little unsure about this whole thing. She had started going to this therapy center a few months ago, her life had been hard after getting rescued. She didn't really talk to anyone on the team anymore, most of them didn't. Things felt weird after getting back to society. Nat's mom hadn't made things easier either, she still pretended like Nat didn't exist.

Jackie nodded, looking down at the condensation ring her cup was making on the table. "Yeah"

Nat finally reached over, brushing her fingers against Jackie's hand. It was tentative, almost shy but so very Nat. Jackie looked up, her heart beating fast in her chest. She felt the same way she always had when the two of them were together, "Are you flirting with me Scatorccio"

"Depends. Is it working" Nat smirks, her face still a little nervous but Jackie could tell she was serious.

Jackie smiled, real and soft and probably a little stupid. "Maybe"

"Cool." Nat's thumb traced slow circles on her knuckles. "So wanna hang out after this? Walk around? There's a record store down the block. I promise not to make fun of your taste. Much" Nat teased and Jackie pretended to consider it but her hand curled around Nat's before she could stop herself.

"Yes" Jackie settled on, her hand squeezing Nat's and the two of them felt like things would be a little easier going forward, both unsure what this would turn into but it was nice.

Chapter Text

The arcade smelt of popcorn and stale gum, the air was a bit musty with the summer sweat from the large amount of teenagers. Nat stood near the entrance, squinting past the haze of the neon lights. The heavy doors closed behind her, a loud slam as they did. Outside the arcade, Wiskayok simmered in the kind of July heat that made cookies bake outside. Inside the arcade, the noise was just loud enough to be overwhelming. Despite that Nat stayed.

She didn’t belong here, not really. It wasn’t particularly her scene. Too many clean cut kids who had babysitting money or perms. Nat wasn’t like that, she practically looked like she’d fell out of a Nirvana poster. A red plaid tied to her waist, a tank top ripped at the ends, black combat boots a little big on her feet and her bleached blonde hair. She hummed along to the music in her Walkman, anywhere was better than her house.

Eventually as she walked through the arcade, she zeroed in on the Street Fighter II machine. As she was looking at the screen, someone spoke beside her, “Chun-Li’s is free if you’re brave”. Nat turned instantly suspicious and intrigued. The girl had shiny brown hair, put into a braid, she was wearing a green top that screamed popular kid.

It was Jackie Taylor. Of course. Nat had seen her around. Jackie was one of those golden Wiskayok girls, blinding but invincible. They orbited different worlds. Nat was cigarettes behind the bowling alley, parents were abusive. While Jackie was yearbook editor and soccer team captain. This was probably a dare. Something the popular kids did to make the weird ones feel stupid. Like the popular boy asking out the nerdy girl as a joke to see her fall for it.

Still, Nat didn’t let it stop her, “I’m always brave” she smirked.

Jackie laughed, but not in a mean way, “Cool. Want to play?” Nat hesitated, she couldn’t be serious now, could she? It was hard not to think this wasn’t a joke. Playing street fighter with Jackie Taylor?

It took Nat a moment before she spoke again, “with you” she asked, even more wary now.

Jackie leaned on the side of the machine, “Yeah, I mean unless you’re scared to lose”

“Please” Nat smirked, sliding in a token, “Get ready to cry, princess.”

They played three rounds. Jackie lost all three, badly. “You’ve clearly been training for this your whole life” Jackie said, mock solemn, brushing her bangs out of her eyes. But Nat could tell it was friendly competitiveness. Perhaps Jackie wasn’t used to losing.

“Nothing better to do” Nat said, trying not to sound like she meant it. But it was true. Nat had nothing better to do. She had gotten really good at the game over the last few months. Her dad would come home drunk more often and her mom wouldn’t do anything to change the situation. Eventually the girls changed games and walked toward the pinball machines. Jackie bought them sodas without asking, Nat was used to this. To people being kind. She had nearly dropped hers when Jackie bumped her shoulder on purpose.

“So what’s your deal” Jackie asked, sipping the Coke like it wasn’t weird they were talking at all.

“My deal” Nat said hesitant, still not entirely sure this wasn’t some sick prank.

“Yeah. You’re like..mysterious. Everyone at school says you’re trouble” Jackie says as she slips a token into the pinball machine. Nat gives a small shrug before she responds.

“They aren’t wrong” she looks away. Jackie was quiet for a beat, it made Nat anxious. Like Jackie had realized Nat was weird.

“You’re not what I expected” Nat looked up at that.

“Yeah, well..neither are you,” Nat muttered.

Jackie blinked, surprised. She hasn’t been told that before. “What does that mean” Nat smirked, she could tell she finally got Jackie to be caught off guard.

“I thought you’d be more fake” Nat traced the edge of the pinball glass with one chipped black nail. Jackie was doing surprisingly well at the game, Nat was awful at pinball. “You’re surprisingly real”

Jackie flushed a little, “Thanks. I think”

Something shifted between them. The lights from the arcade games flickered across Jackie’s face, reds and greens and that weird deep blue that made her eyes look almost violet. Nat’s breath caught in her throat. She hadn’t noticed how pretty Jackie was before, not really atleast.

Jackie didn’t look away. “Did you maybe want to hang out sometime, like not here”

Nat blinked, she wasn’t serious. This was definitely a prank. “Like..hang out hang out” Nat asked.

Jackie tilted her head, smiling just a little. “Yeah. Like that” and Nat returned the smile.

Chapter Text

It had been about money, at first. Nat’s mom had over drafted her checking account again, and Nat’s dad had come home from work already pissed off. By the time Nat had cleaned her plate and tried to slip quietly towards her room, the yelling had turned sharp and mean, something too familiar. She heard a glass break as she turned and saw it thrown by her dad. She didn’t wait to see where else their fight was going to go. She grabbed her hoodie, slipped on her boots, and grabbed her phone before slipping out the trailer door. The cold air hit her cheeks as she made her way down the steps. Nat let out a quiet sigh as her fingers trembled, she pulled up Jackie’s contact in her phone.

nat: you home
nat: can i come over
nat: sorry

She almost hadn’t sent that last one, but did anyway. She hated needing things. Hated asking. But she also hated the way her dad’s voice sounded when he got angry and her mom’s silence. Nat hated how her mom stayed with him, hated how she always chose him over her.

Jackie replied less than a minute later.

jackie: yes, I’ll be outside.
jackie: don’t apologize

Nat let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding as she started to walk towards Jackie’s house.

Jackie was sitting on the steps of her house when Nat finally came around the block. Jackie had her arms wrapped around her knees, her sweatshirt pulls over them. The porch light behind her made her look even more ethereal in the light, soft and safe. Nat slowed down the closer she came, “hey” she mumbled as she reached the steps.

Jackie stood up, meeting Nat at the bottom of the stairs, “hi” she smiled, “you okay” her voice was gentle in a way it only ever was with Nat.

Nat hadn’t answered right away, eyes looking down. Jackie frowned a little before she stepped forward and pulled Nat into a hug before Nat could think twice about it. Nat melted and everything inside her, the panic and shame and leftover adrenalie it all unraveled with that one touch, the hug. She pressed her face into Jackie’s shoulder, holding on a little too tightly. Jackie didn’t seem to mind, she never minded.

“Come inside” Jackie whispered, rubbing her back.

Jackie’s mom was in the kitchen making tea when they walked in. She glanced over with surprise, but it quickly softened into something warmer.

“Oh, hi sweetie” she said to Nat. “Everything alright” and Nat nodded before she looked away. A little embarrassed and awkward.

“She’s staying over” Jackie said, voice firm and decisive, it left no room for argument. Though her mom would never say no. “Her mom and dad” Jackie mouthed to her mom whose face shifted slightly, before she let out a soft sigh.

“Okay, that’s fine. Nat did you want something to eat” both Jackie and her mom turned to Nat, both of them feeling for her.

“No thanks” Nat mumbled, not lifting her eyes, staying behind Jackie.

“Let me know if you change your mind” Jackie’s mom said, her voice like warm honey. “I’m just going to head upstairs, but you girls let me know if you need something”

Jackie nodded, appreciative her mom was always so understanding. She gave her mom a hug who kissed the top of her head before she gave Nat a quick hug too and left them alone in the kitchen.

Jackie led her upstairs. Nat had been in Jackie’s room plenty of times, but something about tonight made it feel different. Like she was seeking refuge, not just hanging out. She paused at the doorway.

“You sure it’s okay I’m here” she asked, quieter than usual. The way she got when things felt too big.

Jackie turned back to face her, she softened a little when she saw the look on Nat’s face, “Of course it’s okay”

Nat slipped off her boots, leaving them by the wall before stepping inside Jackie’s room. She tugged at the sleeves of her hoodies, almost like she was trying to disappear inside it. Jackie pulled Nat towards the bed, Nat had been a little hesitant but eventually climbed into bed beside her. Their knees brushed as a silence came around them

“You want to talk about it” Jackie asked gently but she already knew the answer.

“No” Nat said quietly, too fast.

Jackie nodded but didn’t say any more. It was silent now but it wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable. Nat looked around the room, like she was memorizing it. She didn’t need too, she’d been over a lot. Jackie’s bookshelf had a variety of books, Nat only had two.

“I hate it there” Nat said suddenly, voice hollow and quiet. “I know that sounds dramatic or whatever, but tonight I just…couldn’t stay. I couldn’t”

Jackie didn’t say anything right away. She reached over and took Nat’s hand, “you don’t need to explain” she made eye contact with Nat, “not with me”

That made something crack open in Nat’s chest. She looked down at their hands, Jackie’s fingers laced between hers, “thanks” she mumbled. Jackie just squeezed her hand and pulled her into a hug. Nat’s eyes welled up unexpectedly and Nat had to blink to stop herself from crying. She was angry at herself for feeling so much

Jackie noticed it. She reached out and brushed a strand of Nats bleached hair from her face. Jackie’s touch was always soft, always gentle. “Hey,” she said softly, “You don’t have to be tough right now. Not with me”

And that did it, Nat turned into her, buried her face in Jackie’s shoulder. Jackie just held her tighter, shifted so they were laying down. Nat trembled a little as she let the tears fall but Jackie just rubbed her back, made her feel safe.

They stayed like that for a long time, curled together under the soft weight of Jackie’s comforter. Eventually, Nat’s breathing slowed, her crying stopped.

“You’re so warm” she mumbled, her voice thick with sleep now. Jackie smiled, let out a

“You always say that” Jackie laughed.

“Cause it’s true” Nat poked Jackie and the two giggled softly. Then Nat paused, letting out a breath, “I feel safe with you” she whispered.

Jackie hugged her tighter, “Good, that’s what I want”

It was past midnight when Jackie finally got up to turn the lights off. Nat blinked at the sudden darkness, eyes adjusting. She’d taken off her hoodie at some point, now lying in Jackie’s bed in her tank top and jeans, too tired to care.

Jackie got back in the bed, sliding under the covers and tugging Nat closer. She reached over and planted a soft kiss on Nat’s cheek before wrapping her arms around her waist.

“I love you” they both managed to say at the same time, even in the dark Nat could see Jackie’s smile.

This was the only place she truly felt safe.

Chapter Text

Jackie always prided herself on being the kind of girlfriend who had everything together. She’d remember anniversaries, always knew Nat’s favorite candy bar or snack, and never ever failed to steal the softest blanket before Nat was able too. However, she knew she wasn’t entirely…low-maintenance.

One example was a random Tuesday afternoon, she was sprawled across Nat’s bed with her head hanging off the edge dramatically. Her sigh was loud enough to wake neighbors.
Nat, who was sitting cross-legged on the floor sketching in her sketchbook didn’t even look up. “If you’re dying, can you verbalize it? Otherwise I'm gonna keep ignoring you” she had muttered out, pencil flowing over the parchment smoothly. The two of them spent a lot of time just being in each other's presence.

Jackie turned her head, her long hair brushing the carpet, “you’re supposed to just ask what’s wrong” a soft sigh left Jackie again.

Nat sighed herself at that, she knew what was wrong. Jackie was bored. Jackie was bored a lot. Glancing up, Nat saw the way Jackie looked at her and she took a breath."You're bored and you always act like the world's ending”

Jackie let out a gasp in mock offense, “That is not true” she sat up to look at Nat more seriously, "I don't"

“It is one hundred percent true.” Nat tilted her head at her, smirking. “Remember last week? When your mom canceled dinner and you claimed it ruined your entire life? You literally said that.” she laughed at the memory.

Jackie groaned and flopped onto her side. “Okay, fine. Maybe I do get a little dramatic. But it’s only because you’re so boring, Nat. We’ve been dating for three months, and you haven’t even taken me on a proper date.” Nat raised her eyebrows at her girlfriend. Sure they’d gone on dates before, but Nat wasn’t the social type, exactly. Jackie never really pressured her to do anything different though. Nat thought things were going good.

“A proper date? We go places all the time.” Nat rolls her eyes, still believing Jackie was being dramatic. Perhaps she hadn’t realized her idea of a date was not the same as Jackie’s.

“The gas station does not count.” Jackie sat up, tucking her hair behind her ears. “I mean like dinner or a movie. Something romantic and not some random drive-in movie with cheap popcorn.”

Nat gave her a long look, taking a moment before replying. “Romantic, huh? I didn’t think you’d be into cheesy stuff like that.” because Nat, while she was head over heels for Jackie, had a shit memory.

“Excuse me, I excel at cheesy stuff,” Jackie shot back, a soft laugh escaping her lips. “You’re just lucky I haven’t demanded a dozen roses and a boom box outside my window yet.”

That caused Nat to snort, shaking her head. “God help me if you ever do.” though she’d never admit it, Nat would one hundred percent follow through with whatever cheesy thing Jackie wanted from her.

Jackie crawled across the bed, resting her chin on Nat’s shoulder now. “So? Are you gonna take me on a real date or what?” Nat smiled before looking away, tilting her head and pretending to think it over.

“Hmm. I don’t know. What if I like the gas station?” she teased which only caused Jackie to nudge her.

Nat’s smirk softened into a smile. “Alright, alright. How about this? Saturday night, I’ll pick you up. No gas stations, just me, you, and something romantic.”

Jackie beamed, her eyes practically lit up. Nat’s face turned red when Jackie placed a quick kiss on her cheek. “See? That wasn’t so hard.”

Nat only rolled her eyes, though the smile didn’t leave her face. “You’re impossible, you know that?”

“Yeah” Jackie said smugly, pulling Nat a little closer to her, “but I’m also adorable. Which is why you’re dating me.” Jackie tugged Nat's sweater, a signal for her to get off the floor, one Nat easily followed. Nat allowed Jackie to climb into her lap, her fingers reaching for Jackie’s hair, playing with it absentmindedly.

“You love me,” Jackie finally said, a hint of nerves portraying her.

Nat didn’t look away from her though. “Dangerously close to regretting it” she teased, Jackie only nudged her again.

Jackie grinned. “No, you really love me. Admit it.”

Which finally as Nat glanced down at her, eyes soft despite her smirk. “Yeah, I do”

Jackie snuggled closer, satisfied. There was a beat of comfortable silence before Nat spoke again, voice quieter, more vulnerable. “For the record, you’re the first person I’ve ever wanted to do the whole ‘proper date’ thing with. Guess that means something.”

Chapter Text

Saturday night came faster than Nat had expected, she wasn’t used to planning things. Especially not dates. Usually, she just did whatever Jackie wanted, let her take the lead. Jackie had planned a majority of their dates, especially when she realized Nat would just take her to the gas station for snacks and then they'd sit on some bench and do nothing. However, Jackie had been buzzing all week about this date, slipping in reminders in conversation or teasing Nat about how her plans need to be romantic. So yeah, no pressure. But Nat had planned something good, at least she hoped.

Nat pulled up in front of Jackie’s house in her beat-up car, drumming her fingers against the steering wheel to keep her nerves in check. She’d cleaned out the passenger seat, even sprayed a little air freshener in the car, things she never bothered with until now. Until she started dating Jackie. Nat had changed a few things, trying to be better, trying to be perfect. Though she knew Jackie would never mind, she liked Nat for how she was even if she was a little messy.

When Jackie finally came down the front steps of her house, Nat forgot to breathe for a second. Jackie always looked put together, but tonight she had gone for a simple yellow sundress and a denim jacket, her hair pinned back neatly, a soft smile playing on her lips. Damn Nat was so whipped for her. Then Nat looked down at her own clothes, ripped black jeans and an old band shirt paired with a leather jacket. Fuck, she thought, under dressed.

“Wow,” Jackie said as she slid into the car. “You actually cleaned your car. Should I be worried?”

Nat rolled her eyes, but her lips twitched into a grin. “Don’t push it.” but Jackie could hear how nervous Nat was, which was typical. Jackie knew she made Nat nervous.

Jackie buckled her seat belt, turning to study her. “So? Where are you taking me?” she couldn’t help but ask, knowing Nat probably wouldn’t tell her anyways.

“You’ll see,” Nat smiled, pulling away from the curb. They drove out of town, the streetlights fading into the open sky. Jackie tried to pry the destination out of her, but Nat just smirked and changed the subject, enjoying the way Jackie groaned dramatically every time she refused to answer. Nat found it amusing how much of a child Jackie sounded like on the drive, asking “are we there yet” a billion times.

Finally, Nat turned down a dirt road, parking near a small clearing by a lake. The water glimmered faintly under the moonlight, the air cool but not too cold. Jackie raised her eyebrows as she stepped out. “You brought me to the woods?”

“Not just the woods” Nat said quickly, popping open her trunk so she could pull out a folded blanket, a small cooler, and a portable speaker. “I figured you’d like a picnic. You know, romantic.” Nat smiled as she closed the trunk despite her full hands.

Jackie blinked, then her gaze softened. “You planned this?” she sounded a little surprised, Nat had really put in a lot of effort for her. It made her feel seen, feel loved.

Nat shrugged, pretending it wasn’t a big deal, even though her ears were burning. “Yeah. Don’t make it weird” but the blush kept creeping onto her cheeks, a faint pink that Jackie noticed right away. Grinning wide, Jackie helped her set the blanket out when they finally reached an area near the water. Once they were all settled, Nat pulled out sandwiches she made, bags of chips and Jackie’s favorite candy.

“Okay,” Jackie admitted softly, unwrapping the sandwich, “This is actually really cute. Like, annoyingly cute. Who knew Natalie Scatorccio had it in her?” Nat smiled and just nudged Jackie's arm before taking a bite of her ham and cheese sandwich. They ate, laughed and listened to music from the little speaker, some pop tunes that Nat had heard Jackie listening too recently. At one point, Jackie leaned back on her elbows, gazing out at the stars in the sky. “You know, this is exactly what I wanted. Not some fancy dinner or a weird gas station. Something just us”

Nat glanced at her, surprised by how soft her voice was. Jackie wasn’t often quiet but when she was, it hit Nat like a punch to the chest. “Yeah” Nat asked, her own voice low, a little anxious still. And when Jackie turned her head to look at her Nat melted. She leaned over, brushing a kiss against Jackie’s soft lips. It wasn’t showy or dramatic, just a gentle press that made Jackie’s hand find hers almost automatically.

When the kiss finally ended and the two girls pulled away, Jackie laughed softly, “See? You’re actually good at this romance thing” which only resulted in Nat’s face getting red again before Jackie’s arm was playfully hit again. The rest of the night was just like that. Soft, quiet, perfect and just them.

Jackie broke the silence with a small sigh but a teasing smirk, “You know, you’re kind of screwed now”

Nat raised an eyebrow in confusion, “How so?”

“Because now that I know you can do this” Jackie gestured to the blanket, the lake, the whole setup, “I’m going to expect more of it”

Nat only groaned, though there was no hint of her being annoyed. “You’re relentless” was all she said before planting a kiss on Jackie’s cheek. She watched as Jackie looked back up at the stars.

“It’s pretty out tonight” Jackie said, she loved stargazing.

“Yeah it is” Nat replied softly and when Jackie turned to see if Nat was looking at the sky, she only smiled when she saw Nat was only looking at her.

Chapter Text

The apartment lights are off, the only light source was the orange led lights Jackie hung up at the start of October. She had claimed it was to make the apartment feel the correct ambience, Nat thought it sounded like something Lottie would say. The tv was on and the glow created shadows across the couch. Jackie had also set out a bowl of candy, next to some half finished mugs of apple cider.

Nat leaned into Jackie’s shoulders, her legs tucked under the blanket the two shared as they sat on the couch.

“Ready” Jackie smiled, remote in her hand and her eyes shining with excitement. She loved Halloween and scary movies.

Nat shrugs casually, like her heart isn’t already thumping, “It’s just a movie, Jackie” she did not like scary movies, though she’d never admit that.

“It’s Hereditary” Jackie says with a mischievous smile, “You sure you won’t wimp out” she questions, knowing Nat wasn’t a particularly huge fan of scary movies. Lottie had once told her Nat watched Halloween with her and she hid under the blankets.

Nat scoffs, deadpanned face, “Please. Takes more than creepy dolls and possessed grandmas to scare me” Jackie presses play and Nat takes a deep breath.

Ten minutes in, Nat is fine, it was just a scary movie anyway. She glances over at Jackie whose focus is locked in on the screen. Nat wipes her hands on the blanket.

Twenty minutes in, she’s still fine, still just a movie. Nat glances again at Jackie who’s still laser focused on the movie. Nat takes a breath as she wills herself to look back at the screen, it’s not real she reminds herself.

Forty minutes in something awful happens and Nat’s hand twitches. She discreetly curls her fingers into her palm so Jackie won’t notice. Jackie notices, she always did.

“You okay” Jackie whispers, sounding way too amused for Nat’s liking but there was still that subtle hint of concern in Jackie’s voice.

“I’m good” Nat mutters, jaw tight, trying to convince herself more than Jackie. She nudges Jackie who looks back at the screen.

When another jump scare crashes through the speakers, loud and bright. Nat jumps just a little harder and instantly covers it by reaching for popcorn. “Hand got stuck in the blanket” she lies as she stuffs her mouth with the popcorn she had just grabbed. Jackie’s trying so hard not to laugh. She wanted to tease Nat more but opted to just pull Nat a little closer.

Halfway through the movie Jackie leans closer to Nat, resting her head on Nat’s chest. “Your hearts beating like crazy babe” she teases.

“It’s the cider” Nat lies immediately, she didn’t want Jackie to know the movie was scaring her. It was dumb, that the movie made her sweat, her heart thump, and her skin crawl.

Jackie presses a kiss to Nat’s jaw. “You don’t have to be tough for me”

Nat’s hand instinctively wraps around Jackie’s hand under the blanket, “I’m not scared”

But on screen, the movie played another horrifying scene which causes Nat to flinch so hard Jackie’s nearly shoved off the couch. A few seconds of silence before all that can be heard is Jackie’s laugh, she snorts, doubling over on the couch.

Nat groans, burying her face in her free hand as jackie continues to laugh. “Okay…Maybe I’m a little freaked out. Happy?” Nat crosses her arms as she glares at Jackie who finally sits up, face red.

As her laughter softens she grabs Nat’s chin with her fingers before kissing her. It’s slow, warm, sweet. “Actually? Yeah” Jackie smiles before leaning in to press a kiss on Nat’s cheek.

By the time the credits begin to roll Nat had moved to practically be in Jackie’s lap. “Seven months dating and this is the first time I’ve ever seen you jump” Jackie says, smug, like she won something.

“Don’t get used to it” Nat grumbles as she sits up. Wiping some popcorn crumbs off her shirt.

Jackie pulls Nat back into her arms before kissing her again. “I’m only teasing”

Nat finally relaxes pulling the blanket over both their heads like a secret fort and Jackie smiles as Nat falls asleep against her, pretending she’s not clutching Jackie’s shirt just a little tighter.