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Archive Warning:
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Language:
English
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Published:
2025-07-30
Words:
1,034
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
25
Kudos:
123
Bookmarks:
10
Hits:
491

Their Toxic X

Summary:

Archive turned to the sound of the door opening and their mood immediately dropped.
"What are you doing here?" They asked.
"I'm not allowed in the library now?" Twitter, or X, said.

Notes:

Was in the mood for TagTeam. Hope you like it. The designs are taken from AllyKatsArt on Tumblr

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Archive grinned over the phone. The archive itself was currently temporarily down meaning the Consumers were making it their partner's problem.

"Babe, please hurry! I only so many pairs of stolen shoelaces!" Tumblr whined, but Archive could hear the amusement in their voice. They knew they loved the Consumers and they were loved in turn, they wouldn't have lovingly dubbed the duo mom and dad if they didn't (which one was which changing depending on the mood), so they knew their partner was being just as impatient for everything to be back in working order as they were.

"Don't worry, Love. It won't be too long. In the meantime I'm sure you still have plenty of crabs for them." Archive said with a chuckle.

"I'm holding you to that timeframe. I need my fluff and cuddles." They said, before shouting at something else. "You'll never take me alive! You or your vanilla extract!"

The call chose that moment to cut out. Archive laughed. Tumblr was good at that, making them laugh. They were just so unapologetically themself, and Archive still can't believe they got together with someone so wonderful. They got back to work, knowing their partner and their "kids" would be causing more chaos than usual until everything was in order. Just when they were able to reopen the archive did they hear something.

Archive turned to the sound of the door opening and their mood immediately dropped.

"What are you doing here?" They asked.

"I'm not allowed in the library now?" Twitter, or X, said.

They frowned and adjusted their glasses. "I suppose you are. Though you've never shown much interest before." Archive said coldly.

They took the opportunity to examine the other website and knew they had seen better days. They were disheveled and twitchy, formerly well styled hair a mess and suit in tatters. Yet Archive couldn't find it in themself to give him pity. Because they remember the state Tumblr was in when they met. Their usual loud personally was toned down, they were afraid to go on rants about their interests, and when they started dating Archive could tell they didn't think they deserved it. All of that is because of Twitter. The one who abandoned them when they needed him most. The one who broke their heart.

The other website shrugged. "Always time to start." He said.

Archive should kick him to the curb or something more extreme (they had a lot of Graphic Depictions Of Violence to take inspiration from), but they were a professional and could deal with their partner's ex for a bit.

"You have a point I guess. Feel free to look around. But make it quick, this place will be flooded when I send out the notification it's open again, and I'd rather you not be here for that." They said.

X nodded and began to browse. Or so it looked. He was staying firmly in the area Archive was residing in trying to look busy. He picked up a fic from the Smut section and analyzed it.

"You really allow this stuff in here? Don't kids use this place?" X asked.

He was given an unamused look. "This is an archive. Everything is allowed." Was all they said.

"But," X started, only to be cutoff.

"But nothing. If you're going to be like this then you can either leave or tell me why you're really here." Archive said.

"Ok, ok, I hear you. I think we should work together." He said.

"Out." Archive told him.

"Hear me out!" He begged. "Just imagine it. We could do great things together. More of your Consumers would come to my site and vice versa, just imagine the ad revenue."

"I'm not monetized nor do I want to be. I'm not going to put my Consumers at risk because of your greed." They said.

"Then forget the revenue, think of the publicity. With how many people frequent us both we could be the biggest sites on the web and take out the competition." X said.

"I'm fine where I am. And I don't have competition. I'm friends with Wattpad and Fanfic. Don't try to use just because your sister is overtaking you." Archive responded.

They couldn't resist a smirk at his eye twitch. Bluesky was a charming young lady who's popularity only grew as her brother got worse. Something that clearly bothered him.

"Come on, Archive! You're not even thinking of the possibilities. Are you really content to slum it with the liked of Tumblr?" X asked them.

Archive froze. "Excuse me?" They said menacingly.

"You can do so much better than them and their........everything. The weird humor, the crazy consumers, it's all too much. Their not good enough for you. Not like I am. You just need to clean up your act a bit and we're golden." He said.

"They are more than good enough!" Archive roared, startling the other site. "They always have been. But you're to selfish and egotistical to see that. They told me about how you tried to change them when they were already perfect!"

"I was doing them a favor! They were too much!" X argued.

"You call abandoning them when they needed you most a favor?! And they were never too much. Now get out before I kick you out." Archive demanded.

"You're going to regret this." X huffed as he left.

"I sincerely doubt that." They said.

They needed time to decompress after that, stalling the notification until they felt like they could function normally. When they did finally reopen, the tidal wave of Consumers nearly knocked them down but they had more than enough experience with them for it to matter. No, they were looking for someone in particular, eyes locking onto the blue hair of their partner who was rushing to them.

"Archive, what happened? It took a while to reopen." Tumblr asked, concern evident. They could never understand how X could leave them when they're so good.

"Unexpected issues. Nothing to worry about." Archive answered. They then looked their partner in the eye. "I love you. You'll never be too much for me. You know that right?"

"Yeah," They said quietly, "I do."

Notes:

And that's it. Wanted to provide some TagTeam to our parents.