Archive of Our Own ^beta

Avery let out a soft sigh as she sat in a treehouse she hadn't been inside of for years now but well it was the only place she could think of to come. It was midnight and her parents had been arguing and Jessica was no longer home. She'd left to head back to college as soon as they'd gotten home from the beach and that had been two months ago now.

It was October and it was midnight and Avery was sitting inside of the childhood treehouse she had once shared with Hanson brothers and she was crying like an idiot because her parents were arguing and she half wished they'd get a divorce but she knew they wouldn't.

Divorce was a sin and so they'd stay unhappily married despite the fact that it seemed they hated each other and her father was always cheating on her mother. A woman who Avery didn't have much love for because the woman clearly resented her and always had.

Avery had been the unplanned child she hadn't wanted. She had wanted to be one and done after Jessica but well accidents happened as her mother always loved to say when she looked at Avery.

Her father hadn't wanted her either but at least he kept his opinions to himself, though he seemed to keep everything to himself since he was never home and always at work or with whatever woman he was seeing on the side.

"Ave?" a voice asked in the darkness and Avery came out of her thoughts as she looked at Taylor coming into the treehouse and she was surprised to see him in here.

Ever since that game at the beach that had led to them kissing they had sorta drifted apart for a bit despite her telling him they'd still be friends. Though it also didn't help that as soon as they'd come back from the beach, that Marissa, a popular cheerleader at their school, had started coming around Taylor and taking up all his time.

Avery was half sure they were dating and how had she not noticed it before they had left for the beach?

Taylor and Marissa had been assigned a project together in the last few weeks of school and she should have known or suspected they'd gotten close and something had developed but she hadn't and now here she was with a weird feeling in her stomach every time she saw them together or even when he texted her to let her know he couldn't do something with her because he already had plans with Marissa.

She had a weird awful feeling in her stomach and she hated it and she couldn't help but wonder if Taylor had ever felt that way when she'd dated Trent last year.

"How did you know I was in here?" Avery asked once Taylor was fully up the ladder and in the treehouse.

"I saw the light from the flash light," he shrugged as he moved to where she was seated and he sat down beside her. "What are you doing here so late?" he asked as he looked at her and frowned. "You're crying," he stated. "Are you....well no of course you're not okay. What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong," Avery said with a shake of her head as she wiped at her eyes as more tears came down and she knew then that Taylor would know she was lying.

"Friends don't lie," Taylor said softly as he nudged her shoulder. "So tell me what's wrong Sunshine."

"Has anyone ever told you that you're annoying Hanson?" Avery asked him with a raised eyebrow.

"A time or two," Taylor smirked with a shrug of his shoulders. "Now fess up."

"Mom and dad we're arguing," Avery said as she felt more tears come to her eyes again. "It was a bad one this time. Stuff was being thrown and I think...I think he hit her," she said knowing her father had done that a time or two before. "She found out about him and his new secretary Carol."

"I'm sorry," Taylor said as he reached out and pulled her into him and Avery sighed as she let her head rest against his shoulder because being in his arms well it was nice and it always made her feel safe.

Taylor always made her feel safe.

"I don't want to turn into either one of them Tay..." she said, afraid that one day she'd turn into one of them. People always said children turned into their parents and she didn't want that. "I don't want to be as hateful as him and god if I ever become her....if I stay with a man who constantly cheats on me, I'm afraid I'll lose my spark," she said knowing she was afraid if she had a husband like her father that she'd lose herself.

Avery feared she'd stop being the girl who had punched Isaac or the one who told Jeremiah off or even the one who liked to mock Taylor and call him by his last name because she knew it annoyed him sometimes...only sometimes. Other times she saw the smirk on his face when she said it and those times....well she didn't like to think about what they did to her.

"I can't lose my spark."

"You won't," Taylor told her as he tightened his hold on her before kissing her forehead. "You're never going to lose your spark Avery Goodwin."

Avery let out a bitter laugh at that not sure if she believed him but well if he said it maybe it was true. Maybe Avery wouldn't become either of her parents. She wouldn't be hateful like her dad or a shell of herself like her mom had become thanks to being married to her dad.

"Now how about we leave the treehouse and you can sneak inside my house and sleep in my room tonight," Taylor continued in her silence.

"Aren't we a bit too old to be sharing a bed now?" she asked him knowing they hadn't shared a bed since they were fourteen and had done so on a camping trip.

It had been the last time because both of their parents had gotten angry and told them they were getting too old for that and that had ended the bed sharing for them just like it had ended any sleep overs they had still had too.

"Maybe but no one has to know," Taylor said as they locked eyes and from the way he looked at her she knew he wasn't going to take no for an answer. "I'll sing to you to make you fall asleep," he offered and Avery hated the fact that he knew his singing to her helped her sleep better when she was upset.

She hated the fact that she'd confessed to that during a game of truth or tell with him and his brothers because now he always used it against her. Though during the game itself Isaac had used it against her by laughing and telling her that was stupid and she sounded too needy when it came to Taylor.

Avery had almost punched him a second time in her life then but she hadn't. Jessica, who had also been present, swiftly changed course by daring Isaac to put all his mother's make up on and go to the nearest pizza place.

"What will you sing?"

"Tom Petty," Taylor said with a smile. "I'm teaching myself some of his songs on my dad's guitar."

"Fine," Avery agreed knowing she couldn't say no to that. "But you have to promise to play some of those songs for me on guitar."

"I'd do anything for you Sunshine," Taylor said and Avery hated the way his words made her heart flutter slightly.

-----

"You have to stop moving Zac," Avery sighed out as she stood in front of the easel in one of the community rooms at a local art center downtown. It was a Saturday and school was out but Avery had a project of doing a portrait and she'd chosen Zac as the person to do a portrait of....or well he'd been her second pick.

Taylor would have been her first but he was busy with Marissa. Apparently they were going to an apple picking place today and then to a drive in movie tonight so his day was all booked with lovely, pretty, popular Marissa and Avery fucking hated her which she knew was silly.

Taylor wasn't hers and he was allowed to date and hang out with girls. She just hated that it was taking time away from her...at least that was what she told herself.

"Sorry," Zac apologized as he gave her a tiny smile. "I just wanted to turn up the volume on your phone. Last Dance With Mary Jane is one of my favorite Tom Petty songs."

"Gee I wonder why you little pot head," Avery teased before reaching her hand out and turning the song up for him.

"Pot meet kettle," Zac retorted, bringing up the fact that Avery smoked pot too, though it was only something she did with him or Taylor.

Before she could retort though she heard someone come to the door of the room they were in and she put her paint brush down as she turned to look at who it was, hating the way she had hoped it was Taylor and that hope dwindled when she saw Jeremiah at the door.

"Well if it isn't Ave Goodwin, the girl I was looking for."

"Don't call me that," Avery said, hating the way he called her Ave.

"You let Taylor call you that," Jeremiah countered as he stepped into the room and gave her a smile.

"Because he's my friend," Avery said with a sigh as she crossed her arms. "Why were you looking for me though?"

"Because I just heard the news that your friend Taylor is taking Marissa to homecoming and I was wondering since your usual date to school dances was now out of the picture, if you'd go with me?" Jeremiah asked and at his words Avery felt her heart drop into her stomach because this was news to her as well.

Taylor was taking Marissa to homecoming?

It was something he hadn't told her and well she was hurt and angry and it wasn't because Taylor had always taken her to dances and now that they were seniors it seemed he was going to change it up. It was because it seemed he hadn't even had the balls to tell her.

"Taylor's taking Marissa?" Avery asked hating the way her voice caught as tears welled up in her eyes because the last thing she wanted was to cry in front of Jeremiah.

"Yeah, apparently she asked him last night and he said yes."

Avery frowned at that as she remembered last night. Taylor had taken Marissa out for pizza but when he'd texted her after he hadn't mentioned the dance or that she'd asked and he'd said yes.

"Did you not know?" Jeremiah asked as he stepped closer to her though before he could reach her, Zac, who Avery hadn't even realized had gotten up, moved so that he was standing between them.

"Can you go Jeremiah?" Zac asked and Avery was glad he was speaking because she wasn't sure she was capable of words right now, not when a few tears were now going down her cheek and well she hated Taylor for being the reason she was crying in front of Jeremiah.

"Shit...you didn't know," Jeremiah said with a shake of his head but instead of saying anything more he did what Zac had asked him and he left.

He left her alone with Zac who only looked at her with a frown.

"I thought Taylor would have told you when you guys talked last night."

"Yeah well he didn't," Avery said as she wiped away the few tears that were on her cheek. "He didn't tell me," she said with a sigh. "First year I'm not going to have Taylor as my date to homecoming," she frowned half wondering if she'd even have him for prom in a few months either.

If Marissa were still around she doubted it and well wouldn't that be weird not to go to her last dances in school with Taylor. It was a tradition at this point and even if it was silly she liked getting to dance with him during the slow dances.

"You going to take Jeremiah up on his offer?" Zac asked, sounding almost amused at that.

"No," Avery said with a shake of her head as she swallowed around a lump in her throat. "I probably won't go at all now," she said knowing she'd rather just stay at home instead of having to go and watch Taylor with Marissa the whole night.

That sounded like a fucking nightmare.

"Avie...." Zac started but Avery shook her head.

"My mind's made up," Avery said, sounding determined as she forced a smile. "Now go sit back down so I can finish this portrait of you."

Zac only sighed at her words and she knew he wanted to say more but he didn't. Instead he walked to where he had been sitting and she knew just from looking at him that when he saw Taylor again he was going to let his brother have it and for once maybe Taylor deserved Zac being mad at him.

"I was the fool for thinking he'd still ask me when he's clearly dating Marissa," Avery said to Zac with a frown, wanting him to know that maybe this situation was partly her fault too. She should have known.

"I mean you did ask him to prom when you were dating Trent last year," Zac said, reminding her of the reason she was now no longer dating Trent.

"Yeah and it got me dumped," Avery said with a shrug. "Obviously Taylor didn't want to be dumped so he just didn't ask me and waited for Marissa to ask him so he could say yes. I just wish he had told me himself," she said though she also wished he'd asked her to the dance as well and she knew from the frown Zac gave her that he knew it too.

He knew what she wasn't saying out loud. That she wanted to go to the dance with Taylor and she was not going because she was hurt over the fact that he was going with someone else and again it was stupid of her to feel that way because Taylor wasn't hers.

Taylor had never been hers and she should just be happy that he was going with someone. She should be happy that it seemed Taylor was happy with Marissa right now.

-----

Biting on her lip as she sat on her bed later that night, Avery looked down at her phone which was opened to her text thread with Taylor and she knew he was still on his date with Marissa, the movie they were seeing at the drive-in was a late one, but she didn't care she still found herself composing text to him and hitting send before she could stop herself.

Avery 9:30 pm
Congrats on going to homecoming with Marissa....hated that I had to hear it from Jeremiah of all people.

Taylor 9:39 pm
Ave.....

Avery 9:42 pm
No, I'm happy for you Hanson. It's great you're going with her. I'm sure you two will look great together in your outfits and dancing together. Be sure to send me pictures cause I think I'm going to stay home this year. No senior homecoming for me....just going to stay home and watch Dirty Dancing.

Taylor 9:45 pm
You only watch that movie when you're sad.

Avery 9:50 pm
And your point is? Just stop texting me and watch the movie that you and Marissa are seeing at the drive-in.

Turning her phone off after that last text, Avery shook her head as she reached for her remote and quickly found Dirty Dancing on a streaming website and she hated how well Taylor knew this was a comfort movie for her. But hell it helped and it was nice to get lost in Kellerman's and summer in the 60's at a Catskills resort.

Which was one reason she was watching the movie now. Because it helped ease the sting she was still feeling over what she had learned today.

-----

That night after she had finished watching Dirty Dancing, Avery once again snuck out of her house and found herself inside of a treehouse that she'd now been inside of the past two Saturday's or maybe it was Sunday. She hadn't checked the time when she'd left her house.

She knew she had just needed to get away because watching Dirty Dancing while it had helped, it still didn't fully ease the sting of the fact that Taylor was going to homecoming with Marissa.

It didn't help the fact that she was hurt that Taylor hadn't asked her to the dance. He hadn't asked her and she didn't know how to feel about ruining something they had been doing for years. He was always her date to the dances. That was just something that felt natural or that was what she had told Trent the night he'd broken up with her after she'd asked Taylor to prom.

Avery guessed though it had only been natural for one of them.

"Such a stupid girl," Avery muttered to herself as she went to her playlist on her phone and started to play some of her sad songs as she did her best not to cry but when she felt a tear go down her cheek she knew she had failed at that.

-----

"You really think dancing to oldies in your driveway is going to work?" Avery asked as she looked at Taylor skeptically with a raised eyebrow.

He'd invited her over so that they could practice dancing. They were freshmen in high school and homecoming was weeks away and while they were going with each other and probably wouldn't even dance to the slow dances it seemed Taylor wanted to try to dance to them.

He'd brought out an old cd player and borrowed his parents entire oldies love song collection it seemed and now here they stood in his driveway at eight pm as oldies drifted from the radio.

"It might," Taylor said and he looked at her as if he wasn't sure about this either. "Dad said it might."

"But we're not even going to dance to the slow songs."

"We're not?" Taylor asked as if he was perplexed by that.

"I..I mean those are usually for couples Tay," she said with a shrug of her shoulders. "Do you want to?"

Despite it being dark out, thanks to the moonlight and a street light nearby, Avery could see Taylor's cheeks turn pink.

"I wouldn't mind dancing to the slow songs with you," Taylor told her and Avery wasn't sure why it felt like a bunch of butterflies erupted in her stomach at that but it did. "Now, may I have this dance?" he asked as he held his hand out to her.

"You can," Avery said with a slow nod of her head as she took his hand and let him pull her into him as they started to move with the song and as they did, Avery realized then maybe it wouldn't be so bad dancing with him. "Just promise me you won't slow dance with anyone else," she whispered, not sure if he heard her.

"Sunshine, all my slow dances anywhere are going to be reserved just for you," he whispered back and once again Avery felt butterflies in her stomach not wanting to tell him that eventually there would probably come a time when that couldn't happen.

After all, whatever woman he married in the future would get a first dance with him and that would be a slow dance. It would be one that wouldn't be reserved just for her then. It'd be for whoever he married.

When a man loves a woman
Can't keep his mind on nothin' else
He'd trade the world
For the good thing he's found
If she is bad, he can't see it
She can do no wrong
And turn his back on his best friend
If he puts her down

When a man loves a woman
Spend his very last dime
And trying to hold on to what he needs
He'd give up all his comforts
And sleep out in the rain
If she said that's the way it ought to be, eh