Archive of Our Own ^beta

This story starts with a single beep, followed by hundreds more. It was time for Larry to wake up for work. He stayed in for what he promised would be five, but then it turned into ten, then fifteen, until he was twenty minutes past his alarm. He didn’t want to leave the warm, cuddly embrace of the blanket. Not only that, but he couldn’t think of any reason to get out of his bed. He then remembered his perfect attendance award that he cherished deeply, being the only award he had ever received. He was exceptionally average, being exactly like everyone else except for that “hideous” face of his. Not only that, but he watched the shows and movies everyone else watched, he ate the same food that everyone else ate, and he bought the same clothes that everyone else bought, trying to fit in. He believed that his life would be better if it weren’t for his lobster eyes or his crooked, yellow teeth. However, our measly little protagonist didn’t realize that his life would be changed forever. For better or for worse, we’ll have to see.

“Oh, good morning, Larry.” Betty the Bat said, being the closest thing that resembles a friend to Larry (they sit beside each other and have only talked three times before this). He had walked into work, the one place that might be worse than a Denny’s. He HATED work, with every essence in his body. Furthermore, he hated seeing the faces of all the other people who had friends and relationships, ew. He was livid that other people had happiness other than him. But he was respectful about it other than cursing them in his head.

“G’morning,” He replied, looking down. He sat at his desk and opened his email, seeing if anyone cared about him enough to send him a digital message. The only messages he received were about how he got coupons for one free meal from Edo Japan and how his Amazon order came in, but that was good enough for him. The fact that a multi-million dollar company emailed him, and he got a free meal? He was through the roof. He did the rest of his telemarketing with a smile, even when people were yelling at him through the phone. He then hears an announcement through the intercom monitor.

“Larry J. Llama, please go to Mr. Jerry’s office immediately. Thank you.”
Larry was even giddier, thinking he might’ve got the promotion he desperately wanted, from subordinate to upper subordinate! He walked to the office with hope, not knowing he would leave in despair.

“Ah, helloooo, Mr. Larry! How are you, bruv?” Jerry the Fox said. He had a very thick British accent.
“Hello, Mr. Jerry. Did you perhaps call me here to talk about the p-?”
“Yes, I did.”
Larry basically jumped for joy. He got the promotion! He was ecstatic.
"T-Thank you, sir! I really needed this promotion, my landlord just raised the rent, so-"
"Raise?" Jerry asked, looking confused, before he burst out laughing. "Mate, I called you here to clean up the pee spill in the bathroom!"
Larry felt as if a truck had just hit him in the stomach. He had no words, and he just stood there with his mouth agape. 
"... I see. I'll be on my way then." He mumbled, walking out the door as Jerry kept on laughing and laughing.

In the bathroom, he felt as if he was going to vomit, cry tears of blood and die all at once. He hovered his face over the toilet, ignoring the pee spill, and tending to his issues. He felt as if he was going to die, but he wouldn't really be opposed to that. He had nothing good about him, and he felt as if that promotion was his chance to be greater than he is now, but it just ripped away from him, leaving him emptier than usual. He pulled out something sharp he had in his pocket for times like this. A tear went down his ugly, ugly face. Just as he was about to do something he should regret, a loud thud came from the hallway outside the men's room. He heard screaming, crashes, and several threats of "eradicating Animans from history". Curious (and a little scared), he waited until the noises stopped and the floor stopped shaking. 

He carefully walked out of the restroom, looking at how messy the entire building floor was. Cabinets had fallen, desks and cubicles were broken, and it was a mess.  As he walked around, he heard a thud underneath a table. Carefully, he walked toward it. He looked under and saw Betty, holding her head to protect her from crying too loudly.
"Oh man..." Larry muttered, holding his mouth in surprise. 
“Larry! Are you okay?!” She asked, her head snapping up to look at him. 
“Yes, I’m fine. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, I’m just shaken up. What just happened? Why were there humans here?! I thought this was an animal-only village!” She sounded really scared, and she was still crying.
“I know what you know, which is freaking nothing!!” Larry yelled angrily. “Look, let’s just see if anyone else is here.”
“There’s no one else. They all got taken, I heard it with my own ears.” Oh, right. She's a bat. She’s basically blind.
“Well, if we were here, then somebody else ought to be too. Let’s search.” They spent their time searching the entire office, top to bottom. “There’s no one here! We’re the only survivors left!” Betty screams, crying again.
“You're saying that like they died, they’re fine. They just got abducted.”
“Abducted?! Are there aliens pretending to be humans?!”
“Are you stupid or something? Just shut up. Anyway, there’s one room we haven't searched yet. There, Jerry’s office.” Larry pointed to Jerry’s doors. “It looked untouched, so maybe someone hid there.” They carefully walked over, opened the door and saw Jerry, stress eating.
“JERRY!” Betty jumped on him and hugged him.
“OHMYGOSHAREYOUOKAYDIDYOUGETHURT???” She bombarded him with thousands of questions, and Larry cleared his throat.
“We don’t need to worry about how he is right now. We need to worry about how to stop that human and get everyone back.” After they all calmed down and went outside, they saw that the town was in ruins. Buildings were dishevelled, roads were dirty, and the sky was gray.
“My God… this is awful! Who would do such a thing?!” Jerry cursed.
“It was the old guy!” Betty screamed. “He did this! He made it look like Philadelphia, but even worse!” This story takes place in Atlanta, by the way. Making a place look worse than Atlanta is an impossible feat, so good for him.
“Never mind that.” Jerry dismissed. “We have to find him! Then, we have to make him pay for his crimes against humanity!”
“But how are we going to find him?! He’s GONE!” Betty yells.
“Look there, there’s tank marks on the floor. That’s probably him, so we could follow them.”
And there they were, walking for several hours, following the tank marks. They eventually grew hungry, and stopped at a small diner.
“Hello?” Larry asked. “Is there anyone here?” The three of them walked into the diner.

“Get back!” An old lady screamed. She had an old Ukrainian broom. Her hair was messy and disheveled and she looked like a Ukrainian version of Suga Mama from the Proud Family. She was also a human.
“Y’all BETTA get away from me before I beat all y’all to a pulp!” She screamed, getting into a fighting position.
“W-Woah, hey! We come in peace, bruv, just hold on!” Jerry said, raising his hands in a “we-surrender” type of way. The lady put her broom down, crossing her arms.
“Mm-hm. State why you’re here, boy. Before I beat you.”
“Well, we have to stop this evil human guy… He was in a tank, did you see him? He was talking about the humans taking their land back.”
“Holdonholdonholdon. You said a tank man was talking about taking the land back from the animans?”
“Uh… yeah.”
“This was in a prophecy long, long ago.” The elderly lady started yapping about. “In a land full of frost and a villain's dark throne, An ugly llama must stand alone. With an ice cream cone, he’ll stop the bad plot, One sweet swipe, and the evil’s all caught. That llama ova there sure is ugly. I think… No, I know, that you are that llama. You must vanquish the evil Xandir and bring peace to this world!!” The old lady screamed to Larry, who was currently picking his nose.
“Larryyy….” Betty said, poking him. “Didja hear that?? You have to save everyone!”
Larry suddenly returned to the conversation. Save everyone? He’s the prophesied hero? The one who is going to save all of them? This was amazing! For once, he wasn’t going to be the outcast left in the dust. He was going to be their savior, and save them all! Everyone would love him, and he might even get some friends! He was ecstatic, no, he was determined. He was going to get that ice cream cone, and he was going to defeat Xavier!
“... Wait. How do I even do that? Where is the ice cream cone in the first place?” Larry asked, placing his hand on his chin.
“You must go deep in a forest, the dangerous one… in Nashville.” The old lady said.
“Nashville? I thought this would be more dramatic, like the Amazon.”
“We live in Atlanta, what did you expect? Anyways, y’all gotta go! Hurry!”
They all run out of the diner in a hurry, waving goodbye. This was Larry’s chance to be a person that goes down in history, not some forgettable ugly llama. Days passed. Then weeks. Until, they finally made it to the Nashville forest. It took many hardships (the heat) and the terrifying beasts (a crow) but they finally made it.
“Okayokayokaaaaaay, where do we find the cone?” Betty said, being as pumped up as ever.
“She said it’s by a trash can. It has a strawberry flavored blizzard in it, so it shouldn’t be that hard to find.” Jerry, spouted, shivering. “I’m so scared… I want to go home.” They continued walking, until they finally sound the trash can with the strawberry flavored blizzard.
“Huzzah! We’ve found it!” Cheered Betty. “But.. where’s the cone?” Each of them looked around the forest, searching to see if the con might be anywhere, until Jerry got snatched by a silhouette. “Help! Help me! I don’t want to dieeeee!” Jerry screamed hysterically, thrashing around. Betty and Larry ran toward the silhouette, trying to save him, but the blacked out figure kicked both of them in the stomach.
“Man, y’all best get outta my forest if you know wus good fo’ you, foreal.” The figure said. It walked out of the shadows and it was a human, who was tall and had burgundy hair. She seemed incredibly chill.
“Who are you?! Let us go!” Larry yelped, kicking his legs.
“Nah. If I let all y’all go, y’all gon’ look for the cone. I can’t let that happen or else imma be in trouble, gang.”
“Gang? What are you saying??” Jerry asked.
“What I’m saying is that y’all betta finna leave or else Imma get my gang to spin up on your block and make you bite the curb, bruh. I swear I ain’t playin’, dawg!” She started walking around with her hands in her pockets, looking like she was a gangster.
“Um… The thing is, that our fellow Larry here is the man in the prophecy… for real. So, like… give him the cone, bruv.” The girl didn’t look convinced.
“I’ma check real quick, cuh. Then we gon see if he the dude in the prophecy.” The girl looked over a piece of paper titled ‘secret prophecy’.
“Evey’thang checks out, bruh. He's ugly, he's a llama, so it's all cool, Brodie. Nice to meet y’all, I’m the nonchalant keeper of the cone, Carrie.”
“Nice to have met you, KOTC Carrie!” Betty smiled, shaking her hand.
“Yuh, nice to meet y’all too. Aight, so we need a game plan if we gotta defeat that evil human bro. We gotta lock in and make him see all red, no Carti. We finna make sure to cook, not to be cooked.” Carrie pulled out a map. “He's coming in from all edges, and he gon’ take over the Atlanta Aquarium. We gotta stop him and make sure he ain’t beat us, dawg.”
Everyone agreed on the plan and set off on their journey. They found an abandoned car and drove all the way from Nashville to Atlanta. Then it was time.
“Okay, do we have everything? I don’t want to go there and then find out we need a cow torso or something.” Jerry said, still shivering from fear.
“Nah, we gucci for real,” Carrie reassured him.
“Okaaaaay, then let’s go!” Betty yelled. They all run into the Aquarium, and they see hundreds of the robots from before.
Everybody started beating the robots. “We have to stop them!” Yelled Larry, kicking and punching them. “Carrie and I will beat them up! You guys go on!” Jerry yelled, still shivering with fear.
“Yuh, we finna get allem to back off, bruh! Trust, for real!” Larry and Betty nodded, heading to the next floor of the aquarium. There, they were met with the two young human girls that Xavier was with at the beginning.
“HEY!” One of the girls yelled. She was the shorter of the two and had short black hair, green eyes and army face paint on. The other girl was taller, had a mole under her eyes, and her bangs looked like she cut them herself. She had long black hair, green eyes, and looked a lot less confident than the other.
“We’re going to make sure you lose, right, Mika?!” The shorter one yelled.
“Yeah, I guess, Chika…” Mika said, crying. “Please tell me that there’s not going to be blood, I can’t stand blood.. Ewww, even just thinking about it is making me feel like vomiting…” Chika kicked Mika in the knee, and Mika started crying.
“Shut up! We gotta beat these two or else we’re gonna be in trouble!” Chika yelled.
Mika pulled out a metal baseball bat, and Chika pulled out two very sharp scissors.
“DIEEE!” Chika yelled, running at Betty with the scissors in her hands. Betty dodged quickly, the scissors only scraping her neck. She stepped back in pain, while Mika was behind a pillar, trying her best not to throw up. Larry joined in and started fighting Chika with Betty, but even if it was two against one, she had weapons, and they didn’t.
“Betty! This is going nowhere! We need to get something to distract her so we can get weapons!” Larry yelled.
“What weapons would we even have?! We’re in an aquarium!” Larry then got an idea. He grabbed Mika’s baseball bat that she left on the floor, and broke open one of the enclosures. He then grabbed a dying, drying swordfish. “Betty! Use this!” Larry tossed it over to her.
He then walked over to Mika, planning on defeating her when she was vulnerable. However, Mika managed to see through his attack and kicked the bat away. She then hurled (again).
“Get back… I might vomit on you!” She managed to say out between coughs.
“Ew, what's with you?!” Jerry yelled. “You’re supposed to fight me, not be a coward!”
Mika then starts crying loudly. “Leave me alone!!! I never wanted to do this stupid fight! I just wanted to go on vacation! ” She cries in a corner, getting totally distracted. It doesn’t seem like she’ll be stopping soon, so Larry decided to leave. He ran all the way onto the third floor, and he saw Xavier, sitting in his wheelchair with robot advancements.
“Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.” Xavier said, his voice very, very raspy.
“I see that you are trying to stop me, the Emissary of Darkness. Well, you’re going to have to get through her first!” Another robot comes in, but this one looks more high-tech than the others. It’s very futuristic, and has blue eyes, dark skin, an afro, and a lot of body armour.
“This is my prized possession, my adorable little robot daughter Rika. Kill him, Rika!!”
Rika charges at Larry and extends her arm, a white light coming from her hand.
“Nooooooo!” Larry screamed, thinking it was the end, but nothing happened. The light shone in his eyes a bit, but he was fine.
“Rika! Why aren’t you disintegrating him?!” Xavier spoke through his teeth.
“You didn’t give me any powers. I have the strength and speed of a senior citizen, too. I have no lasers either.”
“Ugh! Just go and play with your trains.”
“Okay!!” Rika runs away happily to another room.”
“Hmph. I can’t believe this is how it ends. I never thought I would lose so easily. This is so not tubular, man.”
“Wicked? Man? How old are you?” Said a confused and weirded-out llama.
“I’m 89. My birthday is tomorrow.”
“Oh. Happy early birthday, I guess.”

“No.. It’s not a happy birthday. It was never a happy birthday. Not until 1966, that is. You see, I was the happiest person on Earth. I was a world-renowned biologist, loved by all. I had all the money I could ask for, and I had all the beauty in the world. My long, beautiful black hair flowed behind my ears like a dignified waterfall. But that was until I made that awful discovery. I discovered how to make animals with human characteristics, and shared that result with my team. But they kept on making more and more Animans. I was ecstatic. But that was until there wasn’t enough room for both to live in harmony. Thus began the Great Turf War. Over 70,000 humans lost their lives in the United States alone. All of that caused humanity to shrivel up, leaving only a few humans in little land. Everyone blamed me for it, and I got everything taken away from me. My beautiful, beautiful face, even my wife left me and took my beloved daughter, Rika. I became depressed, and I hated myself for it. I soon began to hate the Animans after that. I wanted to bring Earth back to its former glory. So I enslaved all of them, me and the other Haters of Animan Culture, or H.O.A.C. I apologize for bringing my resentment out on you. I had no reason to hate you, but all the reasons to hate myself. Just bring the cone, and defeat me…”
Larry listened intently.

“... Listen, you don’t have to be that hard on yourself. I used to hate myself too, then I brought that out on the people around me... But I learned from this journey, and what you said, that I don’t have to hate them. In reality, I was jealous of them. Jealous of the fact that they had people who cared for them, and I had nothing. But I changed, and you can too.”
Xavier sighed.
“No thanks. Just bring the cone.”
“... Are you sure?”
“Yeah.” Xavier nodded. “It’s my time to go. Tell my nieces Chika and Mika that the fund for their Cuba trip is in my dresser drawer. Also, the enslaved Animans are in the basement.” Larry hands him the cone.
“I shall return, to my youth…” He places the cone on his head, and he turns into a pile of ash. It’s over.

He’s gone… and everyone’s lives can go back to normal. But what Xavier said will always be left in Larry’s head. So, in his honour, he vowed to become a better person. To not be pessimistic all the time. To not hate other people for stuff that he caused. He went to the other floors and saw that Chika had been successfully defeated, and Mika was still crying in the corner. Betty was sitting and talking with Chika.
“Hey, Betty.”
“Oh, hey Larry! Didja beat Xavier?”
“Yeah. He wanted me to tell Chika and Mika about how the funds for your Cuba trip were in his dresser.” They all talked, and Chika and Mika became friends with Betty while they were fighting. They go to the first floor, and they see Carrie and Jerry eating food at the cafeteria.
“Yooo, Larry, whatssgood?” Carrie said, her mouth full of food.” They told the news to Carrie and Jerry, and then they beat everyone. They were now ready to leave. They go to the basement and free all of the people.

Days later, everyone loves Larry. People who would make fun of him now want to sit with him at lunch. He was getting more emails from million-dollar companies. But instead of being petty, he decided to return their kindness and actually try to be nicer.
For the first time in forever, he isn’t lonely. He isn't sad. He feels happy. He feels like life is worth living.