Work Text:
spet 09
a apper airplane flies into a writing utensil
its a wedding invation
"omz theyre actually getting married wtf!!" pencil shouteds with surpise. dhe was so raken aback she let go of golffballa, who she was making oht with,,,
"pencil i literally dint GAF come and kiss me on my girl lips111!1"
so yeah anywb they contknue making kjt
leafy uhhhh leafys jn the uhmhmhm like the room where ljke the bride gets resdy and shes talking with pjn of smth
"pin im literally so scared"
"leafy i dont gaf stop moving your fuckass head im trying to atach this dtulid fucking vail thing to your fuckasss bigass fuckass hesd"
"kys"
"bitch okay next monday anw do yuo have durgs??"
"why the FUCK wouldnyou ask me that its literally my weddiing you drug addict"
"im a deug addict"
"ok whatevr uhmhmhhmmh i think i have some weedi in the closet???"
pin pushed leafy off her chair, and sprinted towards the closet, ripping tbe doros open and the closet fell apart because it is very weak closet and does not closet and the closet inside of closrt uhhh had weed stadhed away in a small ziplock bag made for snadwiches,,..
"OU MY LIN FACOTFU I FOUND IT!!!"
"okay can i bave slme too its MY wedding"
sk the roll it ul i think then they smoke the bulnt together but not in a gay way just a friendly gals that occasiknally makeout way
"ouhhhh THATS the shit,,"
"ugghhhg h gmcmnrmrdmsmamq"
the the smomke sdetetctor beeiping
"ahit"
"uhhh i think I kwe need to get the fuck out"
they get outside the room and drop the blunt so now its just brurnkng on the gorjnd and every lights up so lesfy and pin run ojtside with leach in her gorhekjs wedding dress and pins ass naked but shes an object so its literally okay
"OH MY TREE!!11!1! WERE ALLOST LATE TO THE WEEDDING!!1!1"
"SHOT SHIT HSITHSITHT"
"ih btw du yuo stoll have sum weed"
"fuck yeah here ya go"
pin tosses the weed to leafy, the they run together into the werdding venue and evefu one is there like literally evrry one of the sixty five ocntestsants and multiple hosts and one is someknewhere in there too shes just hiding
"whys there so many people..."
"uhnhmmhmhmi wantsd to jnvite everyone,!!1!1"
the girls then noticed coiny waving pin over, as eh was beside firey bc hes one kf fireys uhhh bridesmaidz but for boys idk i forgot what its called,,, (NOT THE BESTMAN)
"oh thats my boyfriend wtf"
"eait pin can u like be my maid of honoir?? i kinda forgot"
"omz girl yes ofc cmon,,",
pin then walked leafy down the isle because leafy doesnt have a dad because shes a fucking LEAF like what do yuolvwant from me im not making a whole family tree for an inanimate object like wtaf is erong woth you
uhhhmmhmhmmh eedding music playing i think
Everyone watched as Leafy stepped down the aisle, with Pin on her right and a gorgeous, white veil flowing behind her. Today would be one of the most important days of her life. After so much arguments, hardships, and fights, it was finally happening. Every step closer was another chapter of their lives closed, and new stories waiting to happen and take place.
Firey didn't know where to look. His fiancée? The sky? The ground? He was starting to get warmer, and since he was already fire, that wasn't so good. It wasn't because he didn't want to marry Leafy, (He'd literally replayed this moment in his head multiple times before it actually happened), but.. He was just too nervous. Anything could go wrong right now.
"Hey man, I don't know what you're thinking, but.."
Gelatin, his best man, had a hand on his shoulder and mouth to his ear.
"Don't worry. Everything's gonna be okay. Just like the two of you planned, right?"
"Y-Yeah. Right."
Firey blushed, watching as his (soon to be) wife strutted down towards him. She was the epitome of perfect, appearing as a goddess descending from the pearly gates. What had he done to deserve her? Her, and her big smile, silly laugh, and sparkling eyes. Firey could name more than 2,763 things he loved about her, all in a minute.
anw leafy got there and she like stands beside him and pin stands beside her and ihhh leafys bridesmaids are the freesmart gang bc why the FUCK not an uhh lanzmzmmzm umhmhmhm
announcer is the proest brcahse that makes a lot kf sense actusally
"firey n leafy, my faovirjte conteztants"
"hi!1!1"
leafy saids
"kys announcef"
firey flips him off
"wtaf. okay.Uh,,"
annoucnef continies reading his scfript
"uhmhhhhh i think you say your vows"
"insert foreys vows"
"insert leafy vows"
"wow rhats so cringy"
"CRASH YOUR CAR!!"
btoh firey n leafy shojt in unison because uhmmmmmcyou copy the actions of your one true love?? duh??? wtaf???
"uh. firey. thru life n death youll go gyatt4gyatt w her??"
"im down"
"leafy ull go w him thru the screen n the pen n the ring n the thick n tbe thin n uandd nd"
"like yeah ofc"
"okaay kiss or wtv idk what striaght people do"
Leafy looked at Firey, a shy expression on her face. She had never kissed anyone in front of a whole crowd. Was this what stage fright felt like? Firey looked back into her eyes, an even more nervous expression plastered.
Firey moved closer, timidly reaching out his arms. Leafy giggled, leaning in and wrapping her arms around his shoulder. Their noses bumped together, and even Firey began to laugh. Leafy smelled of.. Weed? While Firey smelled of axe body spray. Even on their own wedding day, they couldn't act like decent, normal people.
Maybe that's what brought them together in the first place.
Their weird personalities, so perfectly balancing each other out. They truly matched each other's freak.
"Till death do us part?"
Leafy smiled, pressing their foreheads together.
"Till shit do us fart, Leafy."
With a searing laugh, the newly weds finally kissed. The crowd around them burst into cheers and applause. People threw flowers, candy, and maybe at least one tomato.
Firey pulled back, holding Leafy in his hands. He cradled her face, gently rubbing her cheeks with his thumbs.
"I love you, Leafy."
"Aw, I love you too, Firey!"
"But I love you more!"
"yku literslly dont bro sybau"
"I HOLE YOU GET ABORTED."
anw they do bouquet toss and uhhh pin catches it bc dhes competitive but not before getting absolutely tackled by pencil whos also competitvei
"bitch GIVE ME THAY!!"
"NO HO I GOT IT FIRST!1!!1"
"IM GONNA BURN YOU!"
"IM GONNA SAW YOU!"
"IM GONNA SPIT IN YOUR FACE!!"
"IM NOT GONNA LIKE IT BECAUSE WE BOTH HAVE PARTNERS WE ARE VERY DEDICATED TOO!"
"shit bro yeah ure right i do love my ball with holes in jt"
pencil back off, Standin g beside gfballv instead
"hi babe"
"kys"
pin standa iup with the bouquet in her hands hut then coiny runs towards her and kneels down on one knee and he holds out a small black box and its really small and kinda cute and lesfy gasps and drops the flowers and coinys literally crying atp and everyones holding their brestb and watching and then coiny olens the box and theres a ring inside DUHHHH and then hes like
"pinster. will yuo marry me."
"uhh likeeee FUCK YEAHHH 🔥🔥🔥"
they makeout and the crowd goes WILD and everydone starts partying because uhmmmm yipee yipee yayyyyyayyaayyayayayayayayay and firey and lesfy iiss more and more while downing some alcohol because why not and also gomfballs gone thru at least 5 bottles of wine by now
"golfie stop drinking rhats too much"
"SHUT THE FU K UP AND GET ME ANOTHER BEER!!"
"im not ridjng you tonight."
"wair im so sorry!! pencil!!!"
so yeah golfballs just cruing in pencils lap and penis is just crafling her because i require at least one golficl scene in everutning i write ifnitsnposskjble
Firey nuzzles into Leafy, the two of them slow dancing to a new song. Neither of them ever heard it before, but it felt exactly right for the moment.
"Firey, I'm really glad we got over all those fights. You're the best friend AND husband I could've ever asked for."
"Really, Leafy? Me? You're too sweet."
"Okay, I guess I'll take it back then!"
"Awh, wait- Do you smell that?"
Firey sniffed the air, looking up, before noticing a huge puff of smoke lifting into the sky. That couldn't be drugs, nor a bonfire.
"holy shit its FIRE!!"
"but babe ure fire"
"oh thx babe 🔥🔥🔥 but i mean theres an acutual FIRE!!"
everyone lokks towards the dress huidling, and its literally bruning down and soreading towards them
"holy shit RUNNNN!!!! CALL THE FUCKING FIREMEN!!"
"hahaha imagine that in an autstralian accent or smth"
"FIREY LOCK THE FUCK IN YOU SLUR"
anw the end or whetver