Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

blaine:

After 4 years, you’d think you would grow used to Sue Sylvester screaming at you. I fear that this is not the case. Running around the gym, I feel my legs burning. I don’t want to toot my own horn, but I’m pretty much the star Cheerio. Being one of the only boys in the Cheerio’s, I’m pretty popular at school. I enjoy being a cheerio. I hate to say it, but being the centre of attention is awesome. I love that people stop what they’re doing when I walk down the hallway to look and smile at me, or that the lunch lady slips me some extra food because “the star cheerleader has to eat!”.

I guess it does have its cons though, like the girls. I’ve been asked out by girls a lot, and I don’t mean that lightly. Once a week at the minimum, there’s a girl standing in front of my locker with chocolate hearts, asking me to accompany her to Breadstix. I always decline, saying I’ve got too much homework and that I want to focus on myself. This is partially true, since leaving out information technically isn’t lying.

The full truth is that I’m very gay. 100% gay, if you will.

I’ve known since long before I transferred to McKinley, I just choose to keep it under wraps, especially now that I’m this popular. I don’t really care if people know I’m gay, I just don’t want my gayness potentially tarnishing my reputation in the Cheerio’s. I can’t read Ms. Sylvester. I have no clue if she’s homophobic or not, and I’m not willing to take any chances. I saw her screaming at a gay kid once, telling him to go back into the closet because he was a “disgrace to gay fashion”. Then again, she also screamed at another student for saying the word “homo” as a joke. She’s certainly something, isn’t she?

You might be imagining me as some rude jock stereotype, but that’s not true. I’m neither tall nor very muscular, I always try to be nice, and I’m always down to help someone if they need it. I’m also a huge fan of Star Wars. I’m talking: watched all of the movies three times, read (and shamefully writing) Star Wars fanfiction, cosplay, all that jazz.

Nobody knows about this, except my best friend Sam. Sam is also the only one who knows about my sexuality. I only told him after he came out as bisexual to me, since I was terrified he'd be homophobic. He doesn’t share the same level of Star Wars obsession as me, but he never complains when I send him my fanfics to proof-read before uploading them on the internet. In a few days I’m going to Comic Con as Anakin Skywalker! I’ve got the cosplay completely ready, everything from the robe to a lightsabre, and I am so unbelievably excited. Sam is coming with me, he’s going as Johnny from Hotel Transylvania (who actually matches his personality perfectly!), to match with his girlfriend who’s going as Mavis. Sam is planning to introduce me to his girlfriend at comic con, since she’ll be there with a friend of hers.

“You think this is hard? Try having your limbs torn off while being burned alive, that’s hard!”. The screams of my coach pull me out of my thoughts, and I’m reminded of my burning legs. The bell rings, and it feels like I’ve been saved from my misery. I grab my bottle of water and head over to the changing room. “Great work today, Blaine” I hear someone say. I turn my head and see none other than Rachel Berry… again. Remember when I told you about the girls asking me out? Usually they stop after I let them down slowly, but this one doesn’t seem the hint, or the countless of hints I’ve given after that first one. “Thanks”, I reply quickly before practically speeding off to close the door. I’ve rejected her about 8 times now. She’s asked me out by singing songs, reading poetry, a dance recital, and begging. I fear the next stunt she’ll pull will be showing up at my house and breaking in.

Once I’m finished changing, I grab my stuff and walk to my next class. Walking together and talking with Sam, I suddenly notice a boy I recognise being shoved by some footballer.

“Are you going to cry, gay boy? Going to call your mommy? Oh, wait! You can’t!” the guy says. The boy stands up, and breathes in sharply. “Look, Karofsky, just leave me alone alright? I have to get to class” he says before walking away. I look at Sam, who has seemingly no clue what just happened. A pit forms in my stomach, but there’s nothing I can do now. I say bye to Sam and enter my classroom, where I see that same boy sitting in the front row, seeming unbothered by what happened just mere seconds before. Seeing that we’re the first 2 in the classroom, I stop by his desk.

“Hey dude, are you alright? I saw what happened in the hallway” I say. He looks up at me, and for the first time I get a good look at his face. His eyes are blue… Very blue. A gorgeous blue. Almost intoxicatingly blue. His lips are a light rose, and it’s clear to see he takes good care of his skin. He seems surprised, before responding. “I’m fine, I’m used to it”, he says, before adding “thanks for asking though, I’m Kurt”. “You shouldn’t be used to that, you should report that to the school or something. If you ever need something, I’m here for you. My name’s Blaine” I say before walking to my desk. Other students start coming into the classroom, and the lesson starts.

I couldn’t pay attention at all. I couldn’t get that boy out of my head. Kurt. He’s undeniably cute, anyone with eyes can see that.

Kurt:

You’d think picking on random gay kids at school would get boring after a while. I fear that this is not the case. How do I know this? I’m the random gay kid, and it seems the guys pushing me into lockers never get tired of doing so. I’m better than them, I know that. They’ll all be working for me someday. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t really suck being me right now though.

Still, I’ve got more to do than fear some jocks. Like glee club! I’ve been in the club since before Mr. Shue took over, and though we’ve had our ups-and-downs it’s always a good time. Glee club, though I hate to admit it, is kind of my main source of social connection. The people there are all insane, and they always have beef with one another somehow, but they’re my friends. I know that, if need be, they’d stop what they’re doing to come help me.

My best friend is Mercedes. She’s the strongest female voice in the entirety of glee history, if I may say so. I’ve cried to her performances an embarrassing amount of times. Glee, and my life, wouldn’t be the same if she weren’t in it. I certainly am not alone, but it’s quite lonely being the only out gay kid at school. I wish I had someone I could talk to who could understand, and relate, you know? I love Mercedes, but she’s not gay, nor a boy for that matter.

This is a huge gay stereotype, but I LOVE fashion. My weekends consist of scrolling on Pinterest, searching for inspiration to make a new ginormous outfit by hand. I’ve recreated Lady Gaga’s most iconic looks, like the red outfit with the huge hat she wears in the music video for Abracadabra. She’s a huge inspiration for me, together with many more designers.

In a few days, I’m going to Comic Con, to show off one of my own designs! I’m so nervous, but I can’t wait to be surrounded by people who get me. People who see and understand my vision. Mercedes is coming with me, mainly because her boyfriend, Sam, is going to be there with a friend of his. I’ve never met them, so I’m hoping that they’re kind. I’m happy for her. Mercedes is genuinely happy since they’ve started dating, and if this Sam is anything like she tells me, he’s a great guy. She deserves nothing less than the world.

“Hey look, it’s that twink Kurt!” I hear while I’m walking down the corridor. I don’t even have to turn around to know who it is. Karofsky. “He’s probably thinking about bears and otters or something!”, he says to his friends while laughing, who don’t seem to understand the meaning of those terms. I keep my head held high, and continue walking. “Don’t ignore me Kurt, you f*g!” he screams before pushing me to the floor. I’m able to catch my fall, but it still hurts. He says something about my mother, but I’m too busy wiping off my hands to pay any attention. I stand up, and look him in the eye for once. “Look, Karofsky, just leave me alone alright? I have to get to class”. I walk away before he can say anything else.

I enter the classroom, which is completely empty. I sit down in my designated seat which feels significantly colder than I anticipated. I place my head in my hands, and stare at the wall in front of me, catching my breath. I’m pulled out of my thoughts when I hear a voice next to me.

“Hey dude, are you alright? I saw what happened in the hallway”, a boy with brown eyes and horribly gelled hair asks. His eyes remind me of the bark of trees, which distracts a bit from the buckets of gel I assume he poured on his hair. It takes me a second to notice his Cheerio’s uniform. I recognise him from somewhere, but I can’t seem to remember where exactly. “I’m fine, I’m used to it”, I say. He looks a bit upset at that answer, so I add: “thanks for asking though, I’m Kurt”. “You shouldn’t be used to that, you should report that to the school or something. If you ever need something, I’m here for you. My name’s Blaine”. Wait.. Blaine? Blaine Anderson? The star cheerleader, most popular boy in school, just asked me if I’m alright? Is this a dream? Before I can say anything more, other students storm into the classroom, and he takes his seat.

I usually don't get the appeal of the popular kids. To me, they seem like people who never got told no and have grown to be the most insufferable people imaginable. This boy seems different though. I don't really know him, but he seemed genuinely concerned for my well-being. I can definitely respect that. I can't deny that his face wasn't hard to look at either. 

Chapter Text

Blaine:

Today’s the day: comic con! I turn off my alarm, and check my phone.

1 message

Sam: I’ll be at your house in 15, be ready!

I jump out of bed, sprint downstairs, down my breakfast and start getting ready. I have possibly the fastest shower of my life (I refuse to go to the biggest event of my life smelling like sweat), quickly dry my hair and get into my cosplay. It has a lot of layers, so it takes me a while. I go back to admire myself in the mirror, only to realize I forgot to gel my hair, but it’s too late. Sam’s already waiting outside. I guess I’ll have to leave it the way it is naturally, very curly and a bit all over the place.

I grab my bag, grateful that I packed it the day before, and head out the door. “Wow, you look amazing dude!”, Sam says when i step inside the passengers seat. “I’ve never seen your hair loose before” “I know, I didn’t have the time to style it, I’m sorry” “no bro, it looks gorgeous! You should wear it to school more like this” “maybe I will, and dude, you look awesome! You fit the character of Johnny so well, you’d think you’re not even in cosplay!”. Sam chuckles at my remark. He starts the car, and we begin our journey to comic con.

We listen to some absolute bangers on the radio and sing our little hearts out, joke and laugh. The time flies, before we know it we’ve arrived! “My girlfriend should be here any moment!”, Sam shrieks, clearly excited for me to meet her. “You’re obsessed with her” I say while rolling my eyes sarcastically and smiling. “She’s amazing, of course I am!” he responds. “She just texted me, she and her friend are coming towards us!”

Kurt:

Mercedes told me she’d pick me up at around 8 o’clock, so of course I woke up at 4 am. I think I got maybe 3 hours of sleep, which in retrospect isn’t very good if your planning to go to a day-long convention, but I couldn’t sleep! This might be the day I meet my future husband, who knows? Maybe I’ll be walking around in my extravagant costume, we’ll lock eyes and run towards one another, embracing each other and sharing a passionate kiss.. who am I kidding. It’s comic con. I’m sure it’ll be fun, maybe I’ll meet some cool people (like Mercedes’s boyfriend and his friend, I really hope they’re going to be nice), or buy some merchandise. I’ve spent the past hours getting ready. I’m wearing a suit, which I made myself. The left half is inspired by the night. It’s dark blue, with a moon design and covered in stars. The right side is inspired by the day, a light yellow with a sun and a golden flower print. I don’t say this often, but I look amazing. I check my watch, and it’s 7:30. I brush my teeth for the second time this morning, and by the time I’m finished making my bag I see Mercedes pulling up at our house. I say bye to my dad and Carol, and then I’m out the door!

“Girl, you look incredible!” is the first thing I say when I open the door. She’s in a tight black dress, with striped tights. Her makeup looks gorgeous, and her hair is styled perfectly. “you’re one to talk! No way you made that whole suit yourself!” she reacts. “Thank you! So I’m finally meeting your lover boy?” The car ride to the convention is filled with gossip, talking, giggling and listening to Charli xcx and Troye Sivan on repeat (because of course it is, they're iconic). Time flies when you’re having fun, so in what feels like seconds we’ve made it! Mercedes texts her boyfriend that we’re on our way, and we start our walk to the to the entrance.

Infront of me I see 2 men. One dressed in a yellow-and-green shirt with beige shorts (which Mercedes kisses, so I’m assuming that’s her boyfriend) and one dressed in brown robes with a black vest over it, with very curly hair. I recognise his face. “This is my boyfriend, Sam, and his friend Blaine!” Mercedes says excitedly. I shake Sam’s hand, and go to shake the other man’s hand when I see him hesitate. I pull my hand back, realising from where I recognise him. This man before me, dressed as a character from Star Wars, with the fluffiest hair I’ve ever seen, is the same Blaine who wears his Cheerio uniform everywhere he goes, and gels his hair until it looks like his hair has been dipped in a huge jug of lard.

He looks up at me, and his beauty almost blows me off my feet. I’ve seen many beautiful men before, many hot men, many cute men. But never like this, never this raw. The beauty before me is something which can only be described as the feeling you have when you’re going on a walk during sunset, you sit down on a bench and your favourite song is playing. His brown- seemingly golden round eyes, his full peach tinted lips, his full eyebrows and sharp jawline are things of which I shall be dreaming tonight. I have to hold myself back from grabbing his hair, just to confirm it's as soft as I imagine it to be.

“we’ve met before, haven’t we? In class?” is all I can muster up the courage to say. He nods, and sticks out a hand. “did you make that suit? It’s like nothing I’ve ever seen before” he asks. I shake his hand, and his firm grip sends shivers down my spine. We release the grip, before I say anything else. “I did! Your cosplay is really cool, I didn’t know you were into Star Wars” I respond. I turn my head, and see Mercedes making out with Sam. Suddenly, Blaine grabs my hand, and we run inside the convention laughing.

Blaine:

“look! There they are!” Sam squeals, pointing at two people approaching like a child. I turn my head, and look at them coming our way. I look back at Sam, watching him smile and seeing blush appear on his cheeks. Once they’re in front of us, one of them starts talking. “This is my boyfriend, Sam, and his friend Blaine!” she says, pointing us out. I smile politely at her, and avert my gaze to the tall, slender man next to her.

I remember him instantly. Kurt. He looks absolutely breath-taking. His suit is unlike anything I’ve ever seen or even thought of before. The attention to detail is stunning. I look up at his face, and I’m immediately reminded why I was so shocked at our first meeting.

How could he possibly have gotten even more gorgeous?

I see him hold out a hand, but I’m too mesmerised by his face to react in time. “we’ve met before, haven’t we? In class?”, he asks shyly. I nod, internally screaming at myself for making him uncomfortable. “did you make that suit? It’s like nothing I’ve ever seen before” I ask curiously, genuinely infatuated by the craftsmanship. I hold out a hand which he takes, and I make sure to remember each and every crevice and fold in his soft hands. “I did! Your cosplay is really cool, I didn’t know you were into Star Wars” he tells me, and I’m surprised he even knew I was cosplaying a character from Star Wars.

I don’t have to turn my head to hear Sam making out with his girlfriend. I decide that, if they’re going to be enjoying each other outside, me and Kurt might as well go inside. Feeling bold, I grab his hand and make a run for it. He follows along, and we giggle like a couple of schoolgirls running into the convention.

Chapter Text

Kurt:

His hands are soft. I wouldn’t be surprised if he told me he dips his hands in lotion every night before going to sleep. Walking around the convention, we never really let go of each other’s hands. I’m not complaining though, my love language is physical touch and this is as physical as I’ve gone with anyone. I keep catching myself staring at our hands interlocked. My hands are always cold, but wrapped in his, they’re the warmest they’ve ever been.

"Hey, I love your Anakin cosplay!" I hear someone say next to me. Blaine lets go of our grip, and I shudder at the loss of warmth. I turn my head to look at the person, and see someone with a Darth-Vader mask and black cloak. Blaine smiles. “Thank you so much! I love yours as well!” he responds. They start talking, and I zone out for what feels like forever until Blaine turns to me, and gives me his phone. “Could you take a picture of us, Kurt?”. I nod my head as he goes to stand next to the stranger dressed in black. I take a picture of them, and hand Blaine his phone back. “You’re really cute, you know?”, the person dressed as Darth-Vader suddenly says. Blaine blushes and turns his head towards me. “could I get your number? Maybe we can go out sometime”. “I’m flattered, but I’m not looking for anyone right now. Thank you for the offer though” he responds, which confuses me. The stranger grunts, and walks away. 

“What was that? You two seemed to be hitting it off quite well”, I ask. “Well, I guess I’m just not interested. I’m not gay”. Oh. Oh. I knew that, this isn’t surprising. This shouldn’t be hurting as much as it does. I barely know this man. Why am I so upset over this? Before I can think about it further, he grabs my hand again, and that familiar warmth fills my soul. So what if he’s not gay? I can enjoy this.

Blaine:

His hands are freezing cold. There’s no way Kurt isn’t hypothermic! I hope I can warm him up a little bit, but at least now I know the reason behind the millions of layers he wears. Still, holding his hand makes my heart feel warm. It's a weird, yet nice, feeling. I'm looking at a random booth, when I hear a voice next to me. "Hey, I love your Anakin cosplay!". I let go of Kurt's hand by reflex, which I regret the second I do, and strike up a conversation with a stranger dressed as Darth-Vader. I keep trying to end it, and go back to Kurt, but he doesn't seem to get the memo. I'll admit, he's pretty cool, but I'd rather be hanging out with Kurt. I see Kurt looking down next to me, so to try and pull him into the conversation, I ask him to take a picture of us, and hand him my phone. 

"You're really cute, you know?" the stranger says. I immediately feel my face heating up, but in an embarrassed way. I turn my head towards Kurt, trying to calm myself down. Then, the stranger asks for my number, and I feel a pit form in my stomach. Usually I'd say yes if a man asked for my number, but this is different. I'm standing in front of someone. In front of Kurt. I don't want to give him the notion that I'm prioritising something (or someone) over him, so I politely reject his offer. 

"What was that? You two seemed to be hitting it off quite well" Kurt asks, and I can't help but go into defense mode. If he finds out I'm gay, he might spread it at school. I barely know him! I don't know what he's capable of, yet I still want to keep holding his hand. "Well, I guess I'm just not interested". Before I can think it through, my mouth moves on autopilot. "I'm not gay". Shit. Why did I say that? I don't want to destroy my chance of being with Kurt! To try and stop the conversation, I grab his ice-cold hand, and drag him to a booth further away. 

Chapter Text

Blaine:

The convention was incredible. I saw so many cool people, bought a new shirt, got a picture with one of my favourite actors, but all of that is overshadowed by Kurt. We spent the whole day together, and I don’t think I’ve ever laughed as much as I did with him. I can’t believe I hadn’t noticed him before this! His smile melted me inside (that might’ve just been my costume though). Still, I’m worried about his reaction to me saying I’m not gay. Usually I’d never even bat an eye at this, I’ve only ever come out to Sam before, so I’m used to telling people I’m something I’m not. I don’t get why this time it feels different.

Anyways, today is Monday, a new day at school. I’m grabbing books from my locker, when I hear someone walking up to me. “Good morning, Blaine!”, I hear Sam say behind me. I turn my head and face him. “Good morning to you too! We didn’t see each other at the convention, did we? Where were you?” I reply. He turns his head, avoiding my gaze, and I see a hickey on his neck. “Oooh… did you get lucky last night?”, I say while smirking. Sam puts his hand on his neck. “I’m always lucky when I’m with Mercedes!”, he says, before whispering “… but yes” after. I pat his shoulder and laugh while we walk down the corridor. Suddenly, Sam stops and stares at me.
“you let your hair loose” he says, more shocked than I’ve ever seen him. “I sure did. I thought it was time, you know? Plus I don’t want to give myself brain damage by restricting blood flow”. He grabs some of my hair, twisting it in his fingers. “You made a good decision, Blaine”, he says while giggling.

The bell rings, we part ways, I enter my French class, and see Kurt sitting alone. He’s staring into space, seemingly deep in thought.

“Good morning, Kurt!” I say as I drop my bags on the floor, and take the seat next to him. “Kurt?”, I repeat when I don’t get a response. He turns his head towards me and blinks a few times. “Good morning Blaine!”, he says in an excited tone, but I can sense there’s something up. “Are you alright? You seemed out of it just now” “I’m alright, don’t worry about me. I was just thinking”. He fidgets with the sleeves of his sweater, and I don’t want to make him uncomfortable, so I change the subject. “Alright then. This weekend was so fun, we should hang out again if you want to!”

Kurt

I can only begin this by saying that this weekend was amazing, and I hate how much I loved it. I hate how much I loved spending time with Blaine. Being the only out gay kid in school is kind of like having a laptop in the stone-age: sure, you can have one, but there’s nowhere to plug it in!

Not in the literal sense, more like I have no connections here. A queen should never be alone, and yet, I’m as lonely as a blade of grass in the Sahara desert. Where was I? Blaine, right. When his hair isn’t slathered in hair gel, he looks so dreamy. I don’t know how I’ll get his stupid grin out of my mind, especially when I see him at school.

Speaking of school, I’m walking down the corridors, when none other than Karofsky pushes me (again). “Good morning, gay boy. How was your weekend? Did you go to a pride parade or something?”. I have to hold myself back from saying that the nearest pride parade takes place in June, and is a five hour drive away from Lima. “why do you care”, I say as I grab my stuff and stand up, when I hear the bell ring. “I don’t have time for your shit right now, I have to get to class”

I enter my (once again, empty) classroom (seriously, how is everyone always late? The teacher as well!). I sigh, and take my seat. We don’t have designated seats, so I always sit somewhere in the middle so there’s less chance of the teacher calling on me. I place my bag down, and take off my jacket. I look up at the empty board, and place my head in the palm of my hand. What am I going to do about the whole Blaine situation? I can’t start crushing on him, he’s straight, and he clearly wanted me to know. Thankfully this is school, and there’s no way I’ll still like him this much when I see his hair all gelled. I’m pulled out of my own head when I hear somebody next to me. “Kurt?”

I turn my head, and oh no. Why, out of all the days to let his hair loose, did he choose today? It looks a bit too good, even better than I can remember.
“Good morning Blaine!” I say in a voice which might be more excited than I intended it to be. What if that’s how he figures out I have a crush on him? What straight guy is that excited about another dude’s hair?!

“Are you alright? You seemed out of it just now”, he asks, and I feel my heart melting. Why do you have to be so sweet you perfect piece of flesh and bone! “I’m alright, don’t worry about me. I was just thinking” is the only response I can think of that doesn’t immediately blow my cover. “Alright then. This weekend was so fun, we should hang out again if you want to!” he says, and I am too shocked for words. He liked hanging out with me. He wants to hang out with me again. Oh my lord, is this what having a heart-attack feels like? Am I dying and floating to heaven?

“really? You want to hang out with me?” I say, lightly pinching myself to make sure I’m not dreaming. “I really want to hang out with you”, he says, emphasising the really. “I’d like that! Maybe we could go to my house. My family is going on a trip, so we should have a free house!” “that sounds good! Here, I’ll give you my phone number so you can text me the address”, he says, before pulling out a pen and a piece of paper, and quickly scribbling something on it before handing it to me. I open the paper, and it’s a phone number with “-Blaine :]” at the bottom. “I’ll send you my address when I get home!”, I whisper, seeing students pouring into the classroom, alarmingly late. The French teacher enters as well, and the lesson begins.

Blaine:

I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited to go home. I quickly say hi to my parents, before racing up to my room and grabbing my phone which I forgot on my bed. I open it, and see a text from a number I don’t recognise.

[unknown number]: “Hello! This is Kurt :-) now you have my number haha”

A simple message, which succeeds in making my heart start doing flips. I save the number to my contacts as Kurty, before responding.

me: “Heyyy! Glad we have each other’s contact info now ^_^. Did you get home already?”

It doesn’t take long before I get a reply.
Kurty: “Just did. Currently chilling in my room and procrastinating doing my homework ;-;”

Me: “REAL! French today was so hard </3”

Kurty: “I’m happy we sat next to each other though, made the lesson 1000 times better”

That last message sends shivers down my spine. What does he mean by this? Am I overthinking this? He probably just means it in a friendly way.

Me: “we should definitely sit next to each other more often :-D now I’m going to do my homework, otherwise Mrs. Lianne is going to kill me I think…”

Kurty: “I would say that that’s not true but she doesn’t seem to like you that much :,)”

Me: “talk to you later?”

Kurty: “obviously”

I put my phone away, chuckling at his last message.