Chapter Text
Today was a normal day.
A day meant for happiness and smiles to all around.
…
…
“Big brother! Big brother! Come on, you said you’d wake up early today just for today!”
Soft and small frail palms wrap round my left arm, each ounce of strength being used to push me awake. She knew her own delicacy wouldn't allow such an action as waking up her own brother. Alas, I strum to consciousness. As my eyes flutter open there I see a young girl of about thirteen years of age. She has a rather thin build, but her positive atmosphere stuck out even more despite her stature. She wore a yellow and rose patterned kimono. Underneath she wore a white haneri. To tie it together she wore a white obi decorated with a dark grey obijime and red obidome.
Her hair was tied into two pigtails on opposite sides of her head. Her blonde locks fading into a light peachy pink color than her kimono. Her eyes shone a shade of rose accompanied by hints of magenta and orange. Such eyes glowed with such innocence, her entire being was pure and she herself was a kind hearted individual cursed upon this world. Just under her eyes showed a red underlying line and dark circles. A feeling of pity and dread consumes my thought process. As I focused on the girl, her face seemed etched in frustration and anxiousness as she called out my name.
“Big brother!... TSUKASA!”
“G-..GYEH!..!”
I practically jump out of my covers. The girl lets out a sigh of relief. I continue on to apologize,
“I’M SO SORRY SAKIII!” I jump to the floor with my head and hands frantically resting on the floor beneath me. After a couple seconds, the sound of a child’s laugh can be heard.
I was only a year older than my younger sister. I’ve always believed that since I'm the oldest, I should take the blow to shield my dear saki. Unfortunately it didn’t play out how I wanted, as most of our lives saki has lived in her bed suffering from a ceaseless disease. Her smile was obviously faked. I pretended not to notice or draw attention to it. She was doing her part to make me feel happy, I mustn't fill her with the guilt of it making me sad. Despite this, I made no agreement to watch her suffer. I declared to myself I would make her smile whenever she saw me. For her to feel genuine joy.
But this laugh? It was real. It was genuine. A real moment of happiness shared between the two of us. Unconsciously, I could feel my own smile curling up, abrupting into a laughter with her.
This sweet and tender moment lasted an eternity for me. My own bliss making my eyes slightly tear up at a tortured soul’s happiness.
It will be a good day!
It will be a good day.
That ethereal glow of joy in us dies down, not gone, but not as prominent. While Saki talks about her sleep or ideas she has for our stories, the barren house stands out once more. Our parents weren’t home again. Like a repeated cycle. I knew it wasn’t their fault, they were probably getting medicine for my dear sister! It’s been like this for a while, but I had to take saki’s mind off the loneliness she would isolate herself in if she focused on it.
“...Can I go hang out with Icchan and all my friends?” That part of her rambling stuck out, she looks up at me with eyes practically begging for me to say yes.
“Well,” I raised my hand to her forehead, it wasn’t as hot as it had been. A sigh of relief escapes my lips and the girl's face melts in relaxation. “Ah, let me make something first for the two of us, yeah? If you feel like you have the appetite I can make some snacks on your way there!”
All the poor girl wanted was to be normal, to be able to go out without the fear of feeling immense amounts of fatigue. I was the only one who hadn’t given up on her future. My parents just tried to make her “last years” happy memories. But I hadn’t given up hope. Maybe because she herself didn’t deserve to, but what purpose would I serve to not bring smiles to her. Ah, saying that makes it sound like that’s all that matters to her. I suppose I’ve dependent my life upon her survival, as if her own happiness ending eternally would end mine.
Once again, my consciousness gets snapped back from Saki calling my name from the kitchen. Quickly rushing over to make some small candy snacks. While doing so, I heard the blonde humming her own tune. It produced a nice ambience for me and when it ended it felt like something was missing. I pack up the snacks and walk her outside, holding her hand. She quickly runs ahead, skipping access to the rocks in beat with her melody. The farther we got, the more words she could put with her simple notes. I assumed this had been an already planned meet between the four–well, three..?
I only spotted Mochizuki Honami and Hoshino Ichika. Saki’s other best friend: Hinomori Shiho, was nowhere to be seen. As I watch the three girls laugh and play together. I parted my way from the three, knowing honami would be responsible for the two of them. The place they were hanging out was rather nice, a shaded area with only specks of sunlight peaking onto the girls. I make my way to the market, using spare change I had obtained from taking care of Saki while my parents couldn't.
As I lost myself in my own thoughts again, it was as if my senses were closed out and all I could hear was a familiar tune. The same one my sister had used on her way to her friends. This voice, however, was much more mature. The humming was surrounding me, the people around becoming nothing but blurs in my own mind. The sound gets louder, or close? I felt uncomfortable. A chill running down my neck and bringing a shiver to each of my fingers.
“Tenma..?”
Simply like that, for maybe the third time today, I got pulled out of my own imagination by a boy a year younger holding onto my sleeve. He had light grey eyes that once shown innocent, he had a mole under his left eye. His hair was directly parted down the middle, a light blue on the left and a darker one on the right. He was a sweet shy boy by the name of Toya Aoyagi.
“Tenma Senpai..? Are you alright?”
‘TOYA! What a lovely surprise! I’m sure it was destined by fate for the two of us to meet once more! Now tell you're a rising star of a brother, what brings you here to the market?” I beamed down with a bright smile on the sweet boy, he wasn’t actually related to me but we spent enough time together to consider him as one of my own.
“My father.. He was giving me an opportunity to take a breather. He said I must return before nightfall,” Toya looks up at the sky, “I must get back to practicing soon. Sorry Tenma.” Each word he let out his face darkened just a bit more, quickly tucking it away to ask another question. “I–Is Saki feeling better?”
“Indeed! In fact, she’s out hanging out with her best friends as we speak!” The young boy's face lightens at this, his usual stoic face breaking into a lightened and hopeful stare. I could’ve sworn you could see the park in his eyes return once more for his loved one. Feeling that it was time for this quick meet to end, I placed my hnd’’s on my friend’s shoulders, “Now Toya, I wouldn’t want you to get into any trouble, you should run along now. You’re father is right, you shouldn’t stay past nightfall! I hope to give you more good news in the future for our beloved Saki.” I look at the direction of the market, “I’ll even try to sneak in a snack for you!” The mention of snacks usually brought up his mood, but his usual smile faltered and sunk unlike the previous times. My own face droops in response to his depressive aura. “Well, goodbye now!” I turn my back to the silent blue haired boy, a lingering feeling of guilt as if I should ask one more thing, but my mind simply could not make a correct combination of words.
As I walk, I overview the dull feeling it is that I'm experiencing. What a terrible example of a brother I'd be presenting! I quickly smile to drown out the rest of the negative feelings, smiling and giggling at the thought of a happy, negative-free future. One with carnivals and rides, silly shows being made at a center stage. Ah, what a simple but impossible dream-No! I mustn't think so negatively.
I eventually arrived at the market. Well, I was behind about fifty people that WERE at the market.
Is it really worth it..? I mean we haven’t run out of food completely.. It would be easier to come at a later time! Besides, Saki might be done playing. As I turned to leave the market, A man with shaggy brown hair with serene blue eyes. He was about my age, give it a couple years? The man had scars, as if he had been through war, because of that, he looked like a serious guy, but his smile felt warm regardless. He wore a strange uniform made with dark cloth and golden buttons. A katana on his right side. The sight of this put me on my best behavior,
“Yes sir?”
“Sorry to disturb, or frighten if I have, My name is Asahi, It’s not safe to be strolling around just before night. Why don’t you head home?” His smile gave this allusion that he was younger, it made him look like a caring brotherly figure.
“Oh, well I must go pick up my sister,” I looked around and noticed the market had cleared out.
“It wouldn’t be right of me to let you go unaccompanied,” He glances and gestures at another boy in a similar uniform. Muttering something about keeping me safe, I was fourteen! I could protect myself and my loved ones with one hand!
This new boy that was accompanying me seemed older than the last one, he also instead had silver buttons instead of the rich gold ones. Perhaps that meant the ‘Asahi’ fellow was a leader? As I walked to the forest the man followed me with a hand hovering over the katana sheath. Was I in trouble? I didn’t understand.
“I’m sorry sir, but we need to pick up my sister, that’s where I’m heading now! And anyways, my name is Tenma Tsukasa!” The man had no change in reaction, “Yes, yes, I’m aware of how amazing a name it is! Practically destined for stardom and fame! I want to bring smiles to everyone I meet!”
Maybe it was the sickening ego and hope I had for myself, maybe he thought about something else, but a crack of his lips formed a smile right before me. Simple joy from others was my own joy. It made me smile in return. As we sat in a comfortable silence, we made it into a forest. It was quiet. Eerily quiet.
“Who am I to laugh in these quiet parts!” It was by no means a funny joke, but maybe because of that I heard a small chuck-
FWOOSH
I turned around quickly, only to find nobody standing behind me, a barren, broken, sheath of a katana left right behind me. My blood ran cold. Where did he go..?
“H…hah..”
In the eerie dampness of the black forest, I heard that all too familiar tune sung by the woman once more. I looked around, the sound came from nowhere, and given the setting was extremely uncanny. Seemingly as I frantically looked around, an older man accompanied the tune. the two blending well, as I stumble atound the area, the sound would grow and deafen.
Yet something was so off about this music, while it was a happy tune, it was low and slow enough to fill you with uncertainty. The sound grows as I look around a tree.
The somg was blasting in my ears, and my eyes lay on thr man. His eye open, staring at me. I look down and see a tree branch jutting out from his stomach.
I wanted to help.
But I didn’t feel alone.
I was a coward.
I hid instead of helping that man. Hearing just behind me a gargling sound and screams of the man. Swearing, cursing at me.
The song kept getting louder.
I peer around the tree, a creature with disformed human preporrtions hunched over the bloody tree and remnants of the warrior who once walked next to me to protect me. I hold my breath. and witness it leave.
The man’s cold eyes were left behind. Staring.
I stay hiding behind the tree, my vision getting fuzzy, frantic breathing, every limb and joint shaking uncontrollably. Was this my pitiful end..
…
…
I heard a shriek.
A young girl.
A young girl whom I never found.
Two other screames accompanied her.
And before I knew it, I was running. For what would I have if my sister had perished?
All she wanted was a normal life. Was that such a hard thing to have? Mom? Dad?
The song once more grew louder as I find 3 girls huddled up in a corner.
I moved closer quickly without even feeling my legs moving, reaching my left arm out to them with heaving breaths.
“TSUKASA..! PLEASE GO ITLL-“
My sister wails, screaming a name I can’t bother to recognize, the melody drowning out all the further words. I fall to the ground. A sharp, searing pain in my left shoulder, I stare at the ground as my vision begins to fade…
-Ah!
I.. I needed to protect Saki and her friends. I.. I must get a weapon.. That tree. That tree has honed sticks..
I’ll pick one up and stab the beast… no problem…
Yet as I try to walk over to the tree and i stuble over a pale red stained figure with a palm and five digits on one side. I continue to grab a stick. The music drowning out the screams I might’ve heard.
“phTSUKASA HELP ME PLEASE..!!”
I snap my head and see that same creature who got that man loom over my sister. Honami, trying to pull her away, and ichika, running towards me to help me up.
I can get up just fine.
I run to the beast with my stick and try my best to move it. No matter how hard I push I can’t move it. I notice my left hand isn’t pushing it, no matter how hard i tried to push it.. it.. wasn’t working…
I could feel liquids dripping down my side as my vision blurs. A comforting melody still playing as I sink to the ground. The tears and cries becoming dull. As if the song was trying to prevent me from hearing that despair. I fall to the ground in an unconcious state.
…
…
I stir conciousness at the crack of dawn of someone pulling me away. thinking clearly, i see a forearm and a half bloodies on the floor, a pile of ashes, and an amalgamated mess of flesh. One think noticeable were that blonde hair with the pink tint at the end. The same peering eyes staring at me.
…
I couldn’t do it with one arm.
I couldn’t protect anyone.
…
She’s dead isn’t she.
That’s not fair.
She just wanted a normal life.
Had a failed so badly as her brother to lead into her demise?
I can’t breath.
She won’t stop staring.
Uncontrollable tears.
For the sister I love.
For the source of my pride.
For the reason of my smile.
For the loss of an innocent soul
For the girl who only yearned normal life.
To my own arrogance and weakness.
For the normal day that once was.