Archive of Our Own ^beta

Faer rarely came home tired, but when she did, it would always be a bad day. From the aching in her neck or the bone deep tiredness that wrestled with her mind all afternoon.

A month ago, she’d have dealt with it alone, plopping down onto the couch with a tub of ice cream and playing whatever was on the TV as she tried to gain enough motivation to get up again. Which ended up making the gaping maw of apathy even worse.

A month ago, she had to make do with a dingy apartment.

But today wasn’t a month ago and she still felt the same way. Her body unable to move from the couch as she waited for time to pass by.

Today, there was so much more to do.

There were dishes to be done, clothes that were haphazardly placed on top of the table beside her, an unmade bed a room away, but she couldn't seem to find it in her to do any of it.

Faer sighed, opening her phone to see how long it's been. It had been an hour since she started doing absolutely nothing. It was mind-numbing, but she stayed there. She put an arm over her face and tried to drift off.

She had counted to 149 before the door was unlocked.

Right, William said he'd be home earlier today. The house was still a mess.

She urged her body to start moving, only managing to sit up as her head spun.

Suddenly, she was all too aware of her parched lips.

The coil of guilt grew tighter as the door creaked open, lights assailing her eyes a moment after. “Faer?”

She offered a hum in return, squinting as she put a palm over her face.

“You okay there?” He chuckled, going over to the couch. “What's wrong?”

His tone changed, the amusement morphing into concern. She tried to speak, finding her voice lacking as it wavered.

“Nothing… Just tired. I'll clean up in a moment.” The lie felt like thorns clawing up her throat. Whichever one was the lie, she didn't know.

A hand was pressed against her forehead. “You're not sick, are you?”

Faer just shook her head, wishing she could sink into the couch. Maybe then, she'd wake up feeling better.

William asked no other questions, standing up only to grab her a glass of water, putting it on the table. Then, as she heard his footsteps fade, the lights blissfully turned off.

“I'll go clean up, then I'll be back, alright?” The undertone of worry hadn't left his voice.

Another hum left her as she heard a door click shut. She truly didn't deserve him, especially not like this.

She tugged a fistful of her hair while she drank the glass of water he'd given her. The piles of fabric caught her eye. She should at least fold the clothes while she's out here doing nothing.

The shower was running as she started the monotonous task, serving as background noise.

Left, right, over, smoothen the fold, repeat.

She finished two before finding her work crooked. Then another two before she found that some of them were still inside out.

It was stupid. It was moronic, but she felt like curling up on the couch and staying that way for another week. What good was she if she couldn't fold clothes for goodness sake.

She pulled back her arm only to hit the glass on the way, spilling it over the table as she cursed. Could nothing go right today?

As the water slowly dripped down the edge of the table, she was— again— doing nothing.

Waiting, but not knowing what for. For her problems to suddenly disappear? For something to magically do all her tasks?

For the first time in months, Faer felt like crying and nothing more.

She should wipe the table, it wasn't even hard, but it felt like a mountain of work suddenly piled itself upon her shoulders.

So she laid on the couch, dead to the world as she finally sobbed. She didn't even hear the door opening, or realise that the shower had stopped.

“Darling?” She barely heard William rushing as she buried her face into her own arms. She didn't want him to see her like this.

There was a silence as he finally realised what was going on.

“Do you want me to hold you?” The question was tentative, like he needed permission to begin with. She nodded to it, relishing in the warmth his hug brought.

That was one benefit of being tall. The thought brought a half smile to her face even as she sniffled.

He ran his hand through her hair, tangled from neglect and her fingers pulling at them. He didn't ask and she wasn't in any condition to answer anyway.

“You're alright… It'll be okay.” He whispered small reassurances, multiple variations of the same meaning. And she knew he'd repeat it as many times as it took until she believed it. Then maybe even a little more, just to be sure.

Once her tears finally dried, she smelt lavender on him. The realisation made her choke out a laugh. William gave her a peck on the top of her head as he hummed.

“What's so funny?” The concern was still there, but now it was tinged with amusement.

She made sure to move carefully in his hold, so as to not rub snot all over him. “You used my shampoo. I thought you hated it.”

She heard him groan and nuzzle into her hair. The feeling of him being close made her relax further.

“Mine ran out and I forgot to buy more.” he said, trying to seem disgruntled.

For a moment, Faer could believe she didn't have piles of things to do. She could forget that, in the midst of their usual banter.

He ignored her shaky voice and she ignored the way his hold was still tighter than usual around her.

When she unfurled her arms, William grabbed a tissue and offered it to her. He still wiped the edges of her face gently as she cleaned the remains of her crying.

That reminded her. The spilled glass. She looked to the table and saw that the water had already seeped into the carpet below.

He noticed her gaze and turned her head back towards him.

“I'll take care of that later.” he said, thumb rubbing against her cheek. “In fact, I'll do the chores today.”

Faer frowned, looking at him like he'd just said something absurd. “That's my job, you don't need to…” She felt like enough of a burden today, she didn't think she could handle more.

His eyes stayed maddeningly soft, but firm.

“I want to.” William then narrowed his eyes as they peered at hers. “And no, this isn't some weight I'm forced to carry. This is me, wanting to help my wife get some rest.”

She felt tears prick at the edge of her eyes again as she turned her head away. A huff left her. “It's not fair to you, to have to make up for me being useless.”

Faer felt his arms tighten around her shoulders. William sighed, his voice quiet as he spoke. “Look at me.”

Reluctantly, she did just that.

“You're not useless, alright?” he said, enunciating the words carefully to let them sink in. “You're not useless, you just need a break.”

“And trust me when I say, I am happy enough to take over whenever you can't handle it anymore.” he continued, tone earnest as he spoke. “So, please, tell me if you need help. I don't want to see you force yourself through it because you don't have to.”

She truly didn't deserve the man in front of her, and it was clear at that very moment. His words did loosen the grip of guilt around her chest, but it didn't dispel it fully.

“Still—” Faer was cut off as William shushed, covering her mouth as he narrowed his eyes.

“No, no arguing. You're getting rest, I'll finish up the chores and we'll both have a nice lazy day off today.”

She didn’t get to argue as he suddenly lifted her off the couch in a princess carry. She was much too shocked to struggle and too tired for it in any case.

He lightly kicked the door to their bedroom and placed her lightly onto the sheets. The soft surface eased the ache in her neck. A pillow was placed underneath her head as she was lost in thought for a moment.

She had to go to work tomorrow and she hadn’t prepared anything. So, with the last of her willpower, she tried to get back up. Her body begged to stay, but she knew she couldn’t, not yet. “Wil, I need to—”

He pushed her back down slowly, preventing her from getting back up as a sigh left his lips.

“You’re taking the day off tomorrow.” he stated it like it was definite and she didn’t argue with that. He knew before she even said it.

The weight on her shoulders were gone, but she still felt their phantoms. “Are you sure it’s alright?”

He scoffed and ruffled her hair. “The house won’t burn down because you take a break for one day. Besides—” He pulled back his arm. “—you trust me to take care of everything today, don’t you?”

A nod was all she managed as she laid back down. Just as William reached the door, she finally spoke up again. “Wil?”

She heard his hum before continuing, hoping the words conveyed her message well enough. “I’ll wait for you.”

A simple sentence, because she didn’t have the energy to wax poetry at him. She would if she could. It brought a smile to her face as she found no doubt that he’d understand regardless.

“I know.” She heard his smile as he left the room.

The door didn’t click shut as he left it slightly open, a promise that he’d be back.