Archive of Our Own ^beta

The thing is, Harry really likes giving head.

He loves the feel of a hard cock in his mouth. That mixed up musk and man and want he can taste as he traces the veiny underside with the tip of his tongue. The way he can bring his partner undone with suction here and the carefully timed blow there. He just loves giving head. But the thing he probably loves most out of sucking cock is the birthday blow job.

Harry’s been told before how good his skills are. He usually blushes bright red and has to duck his head or press his lips to their hip bone to hide the pleased as punch look on his face - but it’s nice to be told. What he really loves though - is the opportunity to take it slow, make it mean something, watch his partner slowly fall apart into varying shades of “yeah, like that,” and “oh fuck.” Then - the best of them all - “please, pleasepleaseplease, please!” when they just can’t take it anymore.

So it’s probably why birthday blowjobs are both his favourite and least favourite part of a relationship - because so far - they’ve been the deathknell for three of them.

1. Will

He was seventeen and he’d spent the night at Will’s getting amazingly drunk for his mate’s eighteenth birthday.Will had made a big deal out of not caring if Harry liked boys or girls or just sex in general and Harry just loved him so much for not giving a shit and sending glares to anyone that might have that well - it seemed like a good idea at the time.

They’d passed out together sometime that night or early morning - probably early morning, all snuggled up and warm in the safety of Will’s childhood bed. Will was breathing all soft and sweet against Harry’s neck and well, Will had stuck up for him at school the friday before when some dick heads had said some shit about Harry being a poof or something and he really just loved him. Loved that Will indulged Harry in new songs to sing in their band and didn’t care if he changed words around so lyrics of love and lust could be sang to anyone. Loved that he’d known Will forever and he hadn’t batted an eyelash when Harry’d admitted to him that he might actually like boys as well as girls the week before when they’d been at some party out of town and Will had walked into a room where Harry had been sucking face with some lad and getting a cheeky handjob.

So sue him if he thought it was a good idea to wake up a mate with his mouth on his cock. He and Will had kissed before - practiced before either of them had worked up the courage to try it on with a girl. He slowly slid out of Will’s arms and down his body, tugging down Will’s pants - the only thing he was sleeping in apart from some button down that he’d worn the night before. Like most teenagers and Harry every other day - Will was already half hard and with a few light kisses on the crown from Harry, Will’s cock was fattening up, thick in Harry’s hand. It was a little weird seeing his mates dick from this angle. But it still tasted the same - all boy and a little salty from sweat and bitter from things Harry didn’t want to put his mind too - still felt good on his tongue.

“Mmm, feels good,” Will’s sleep husky voice came from somewhere above and Harry smirked a little to himself before sliding his mouth right over the head.

He started bobbing up and down slow, getting used to the feel of Will’s prick in his mouth when he felt fingertips brushing the curls from his forehead. Slight tugs that let him know he was doing the right thing and maybe this would be okay. Maybe Will was more accepting of Harry because he wanted something more, too. Maybe this was the best idea Harry ever had. Will was his best mate and a blow job was a blow job right? Everyone wanted one.

Except seconds after Will had filled Harry’s mouth with spunk, and Harry had pulled off, wiping at his mouth, things went decidedly wrong. . .

“Harry. . . Harry? What are you? Fuck!”

Harry’s ear still rang from where Will’s hand had connected with the side of his head. He rolled onto his side and felt the dip on the mattress where Will had slid off.

“What the fuck? What were you thinking of doing that, Haz?”

Will sounded so upset, so shocked and - well maybe even a little bit disgusted and it sucked the warmth out of Harry faster than he thought could be possible. He shrugged and held his hand on his still stinging ear. “Happy birthday?” he mumbled and Will breathed in quick, this gasping sound and then he was back sitting on the bed, hand light on Harry’s knee.

“Harry,” Will said his name with what Harry assumed to be pity and oh god, he’d made a right mess of this.

“Thanks but, no. You’re. . . we’re. . . I think i’ll head downstairs and make a start on the cleaning,” Will said patting at Harry’s leg a little awkwardly, leaving Harry to squeeze his eyes closed and hope if he did it hard enough he could rewind the last ten minutes of his life.

Things had been awkward between them for the rest of the day - Harry staying to help clean up before Will’s parents got home. The only other time they ever discussed what happened had been Will stating over a pint on Harry’s eighteenth.

“Don’t expect me to wake you up like you did for my birthday,” Will said and Harry sputtered on his beer, “I love ya mate, but not that much.”

And that was Harry’s first experience with Birthday Blowjobs. It should have really been a sign for things to come.

2. Louis

The next time he tried birthday head was when he was in a committed relationship. He loved Louis and Louis loved him - he knew this, they’d been dating for six months and flirting obscenely with each other for four before that. They’d just moved into a little flat together and it was Christmas Eve and Louis’ birthday and they were ever so drunk.

Maybe the drinking part was something Harry should have focused on.

He’d dragged Louis into their tiny bathroom - flat filled with people all sharing in the “wonder of the day of my birth” so Louis had proclaimed earlier. They were laughing and kissing and Louis’ bum fit so perfectly in Harry’s hands that he wasn’t thinking much more apart from tastetouchtastetouch and wantwantwant. He’d had quite a few cocktails and even more shots sucked from over Louis’ delicious little body that every part of Harry was tingling. Louis was probably the same, maybe even more so considering he'd been "planning" with Niall for the better part of the day. Pregaming was probably a more accurate description of what they got up to while Harry'd been doing a last minute shift at the coffee shop where he worked.

But he loved touching Louis. Loved licking his way all over Louis’ tight little body - the sharp edges of his cheekbones, the round of his belly, the meat of his thighs. The day after they’d moved in he’d not let Louis out of bed - just kept him there so he could touch and taste every part of Louis until he was satisfied. Turns out he never was, but Louis had complained he couldn’t feel his toes after they’d made each other come so much Harry was sure his dick would fall off. So they’d slept and Harry’d made them dinner out of the few eggs and chunk of wensleydale cheese they’d had in the fridge. It wasn’t much but then - all Harry thought he needed was a bit of food and his Louis to make his life whole.

“Gonna blow you for your birthday,” Harry whispered in Louis’ ear as he groped shamelessly at Louis’ bum. Louis just groaned, his little vampire teeth sharp on Harry’s neck as he sucked what was probably going to be an amazing bruise into Harry’s skin for him to hide in the morning. Thank goodness it was December so Harry could get away with wearing a bloody scarf indoors - Louis’ little sisters had given Harry enough schtick the first time he’d spent the weekend and Louis had attacked his skin leaving extremely obvious purple and red marks. He really could do without having to fend them off and the spectacular hangover he was sure to have in the morning when they headed up to Louis’ parents for Christmas day.

“Gonna suck your brains out,” Harry said, smile wide, dimples deep as he ground his hips up into Louis’, Louis’ head thunking loud and out of time from the heavy bass in the room beyond.

“Fuck yeah, c’mon, Curly, show me what you got,”

Louis giggled as Harry dug his hands into Louis’ bum, as Louis hitched his legs around Harry’s hips. Harry pulled them both back off the door, spinning them around much to Louis’ delighted giggles. He sat Louis down on the tiny basin - their bathroom hardly big enough for two people to stand let alone one to sit on the sink while the other one dropped none to graciously to the floor in front of him.

“Oww,” Harry said, all drawn out and slow because he forgot how much it fucking hurt his knees on the tiles below. Louis’d slid back down from where Harry’d put him, pressing his lips to Harry’s brow.

“Come on champ, wouldn’t have been able to reach with me up there anyhow,” Louis’ said, sitting himself behind Harry on the toilet which thankfully had the seat down. “Here though, here you wouldn’t even have to bend,” Harry turned around to find Louis already tugging his cock out from under his pants, a smirk on his face and humor in his eyes that was partially hidden by his soft caramel fringe falling across it.

Harry had to lean up and kiss Louis all hard and needy because fuck if he didn’t love this boy.

“Good thinking,” he’d said, batting Louis’ hands away and with no pretense on what he had wanted to be doing - took Louis’ dick in his mouth and down, down down till it hit the back of his throat.

Which probably wasn’t the best idea.

Louis’ hands were in Harry’s hair in an instant, guiding Harry’s mouth up and down and Harry was probably too drunk to do this. But he loved Louis and it was Louis’ birthday and they had to be up early to head to Louis’ parents so, this was going to have to do. He licked and sucked and Louis was moaning filthily above him, all - “oh Christ, Haz, your mouth,” and “wanna fuck your mouth, oh god let me fuck your mouth.”

Which, looking back, was probably when Harry should have rethought his birthday blowjob idea.

Harry’d had plenty to drink and he didn’t have the best of gag reflexes - he was working on them - so he tried to hold Louis down a bit with an arm against his stomach. Louis was having none of it, he probably didn’t realise why Harry was attempting to hold him back or was too drunk to notice. He kept pushing Harry’s head down and holding him there as Harry tried valiantly not to choke. Harry’s stomach burbled and not in the good “I’m getting off on getting Louis off” way it normally did in this situation. No, this was a “remember that last shot that Niall mixed something creamy with something fluro well - you will soon.”

He didn’t have a second to force Louis off. He didn’t have a second to actually breath or pinch Louis’ leg to get his attention. One moment it was the tickle of Louis’ pubes just under his nose and the next it was a technicolour rainbow covering Louis’ lap and Louis’ shriek that would have woken the dead in the cemetery that was two streets over.

It wasn’t the reason they broke up three months later. But Harry wasn’t entirely sure it wasn’t one of them.

 

3. Nick

Nick was Harry’s friend with benefits. Well - Nick was Harry’s much older, much more experienced, “wow, I never knew what rimming was until I met you,” friend who Harry benefited from.

Nick also had mad friends and was actually semi-famous with his night time show on Radio One and his best mates like Annie Mac and Example and who Harry met through his own slightly famous friend, Ed at a party that neither of them were really invited to. Nick was big hair and a big smile and a big heart and snarky words and a sharp tongue and he was fun. Harry liked fun. Needed fun. He’d not dated anyone since Louis - fucked around with a few lads here and there and even gone back to pussy a little for a while but nothing had stuck. There was no one he really liked and he was just out of Uni and still had no idea what he wanted to do with his life but his Mum had remarried and his new step-dad didn’t mind paying for a flat as long as Harry showed up for Sunday brunch and rung his mother twice a week.

So Nick was - Nick was good for Harry.

Nick was also great in bed - not great, fucking spectacular. Up until Harry was with Nick - he’d never really bottomed before. Louis liked to be fucked and Harry’d only ever fucked Louis and had the odd blowjob and handy in the back of clubs or in cars so topping was all he really knew. Until Nick. Nick with his long fingers and his quirky brow when Harry made noises he never knew he could. Nick with his, “Come on love, you’ve got to try both - what’s the point otherwise?” and his “you wait till you get my tongue in your arse, you’ll forget all about what why you ever wanted someone else to have all the fun,” and his “god you’re gonna break my dick you're that tight.”

Nick was also remarkably good at dirty talk.

Who’d have known?

So when it was Nick’s birthday and Harry’d actually woken up earlier than his friend with benefits - definitely not boyfriend no matter what Henry and Aimee and Pix tried to tell him and Grimmy both - a Harry Styles Birthday Blowjob was in order.

He kissed Nick awake with short brushes against his lips and a hand stroking lightly over Nick’s prick. Nick always took a forever to wake up which was fine because Harry wanted to take it slow, wanted to make it good. Wanted to maybe let the thought of waking up to Harry doing this to Nick on more than just his birthday be something for Nick to consider.

So maybe all the talk of “boyfriend” had got Harry thinking the night before. Maybe he actually liked Nick a lot and maybe he wanted to shift their relationship into a new gear because he himself didn’t give a rats about how “young you are, dear Harold,” or “god, I feel like I’ve got bloody Lolita in my bed.” Though obviously Nick did. Maybe giving Nick the best blowjob of his life could sort that. Maybe.

Of course - Harry should have known that something would go wrong.

It was his maybe boyfriend’s birthday - if Harry hadn’t learned anything by now about blow jobs and birthdays not mixing then hearing Nick’s moans turn into conversation should have been something to go by.

It wasn’t as if Harry hadn’t heard Nick’s phone buzzing while he tongued at Nick’s balls. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t heard Nick answer with a tightness to his tone that made a bit of warmth burst in Harry’s chest as he sucked just the head of Nick’s dick in his mouth, then hollowed out his cheeks as he went down. It wasn’t as if Nick hadn’t had phone calls before while Harry gave him head - they’d make a game of it some afternoons when Finchy would call to plan their nights show and Harry would try to get Nick moaning before he rang off.

But this wasn’t meant to be one of those times. So Harry tried harder, pulling out all the stops, rubbing one finger behind Nick’s bollocks and tracing the puckered skin of his hole before sliding his finger in - spit slick from when Harry’s tongue had been there seconds before. He made good use of the gag reflex he no longer had - banana’s were a wonderful fruit to practice on - and he did all the things he knew got Nick off.

But nothing.

Nothing but Nick talking about the party the night before and occasionally running his fingers through Harry’s curls and biting at his lip when Harry finally looked up. When Nick came, it was with his hand on Harry’s head and a deep intake of breath that could have been mistaken for a yawn.

Harry pulled off when Nick had finished, Nick still on the phone but patting Harry’s cheek lightly and mouthing a soft “thanks, love.” Nick slid from between the sheets without another word, just some ums and ahh’s that indicated he was listening to whoever it was on the phone leaving Harry sat in the middle of the bed, his own cock softening wondering just what it was he’d done wrong.

The friends with benefits thing didn’t last much longer after that. Harry couldn’t do the “benefits” side of things anymore without feeling like he was being used and Nick barely kept up the “friends” part once this model mate of his moved into his house and then a few months later, deliriously happy into his bed.

That was when Harry decided - no more Birthday Head. Any other time it seemed to work out fine but when he tried to make things extra special - it turned out worse instead.

 

4. Liam

 

After Nick, Harry stopped fucking around. He didn’t want “friends with benefits” anymore. Didn’t want the casual shags at pubs where he and Louis - who he remained friends with - made a game of how many lads they could pull in one night. He didn’t want the quickies or the random he wanted something more.

He wanted someone to come home to that wasn’t Niall in his bloody pants with cheese fingermarks all over his once white shirt still playing C.O.D like it was his job. Which it was - but he did have to leave the house at some point to go and code or whatever it was that he did with Zayn in the bowels of some basement where all the gamer geeks from the company they worked for congregated. It was probably one of the skyscrapers in the city for all Harry knew - but when he liked to imagine Niall working it was someplace without light considering how pale Niall’s skin was.

He wanted someone to bring him soup when he was sick, wanted someone to curl up to in bed that wasn’t the sixteen year old cat his mother had insisted he take from the family home because it was leaving hair everywhere. He wanted someone to share his life with and to talk to about more than footy scores and pints and if they had a chance that Trivia Night down at the pub.

Then one day, when he wasn’t even looking, Liam stepped into the record store where Harry worked and when one conversation about failed attempts at X Factor turned into a long lunch, a dinner and several more - Harry had what he wanted without even having to try. Much.

Liam was like a bloody oven in bed, keeping Harry’s cold toes warm and the best of snugglers on the sofa when he and Niall had joined forces to make Harry watch all three Toy Story movies because Niall had taken on a job with Pixar for some new game. He was there with chicken soup that he had his mum make especially because Harry’d caught a horrible cold in the middle of summer and his own mum was on holiday in bloody Canada of all places. Liam was slow sex on sunday afternoons and cheeky handjobs when they were on a train out to Brighton for their first “couples” mini break. Liam was completely unintelligible text messages throughout the day that made Harry smile and Louis throw bits of bread roll at his face when they were out to brunch and Liam was working or just lying about at home waiting for Harry to return.

Liam was everything that Harry wanted, all the good bits of all his other relationships and even more that he didn’t realise he could have.

Which is why he might have overreacted when he woke up to Liam’s mouth on his cock on Liam’s birthday of all things.

He’d made good on his promise to himself about no Birthday Blowjobs. He’d fucked Liam the night before after they’d been out to dinner - just the two of them and skipped dessert once Harry had mentioned - in detail - how he was going to eat Liam out when they got home. Strip him bare and make him fall apart under fingers and tongue. Liam’s added muscle from all the throwing around of strangers in need and hoses and all that from his job as a trainee fire fighter came into use as he picked Harry up and swung him over his shoulder after paying their bill. They’d had lots of fun and Harry’d wrung out two orgasms from Liam before they fell asleep - sweaty and sated and slightly sticky because neither of them were able to get up and grab a wash cloth to clean up. He was happy - so very happy with how his life was panning out and he had a Liam and that was all he needed really.

A Liam and great conversation and even greater sex and friends and family that were happy and healthy and - that’s all he could want for.

So Liam winking up at Harry while his full lips thinned out around Harry’s length wasn’t exactly what Harry’d been hoping for. In fact - he couldn’t think of anything worse. It was Liam’s birthday and even though it wasn’t Harry giving head - there was still head being had so in all playable scenarios - this ended badly for Harry.

Though he would get an orgasm out of this at least. But no. No. He liked Liam. Loved Liam quite a lot actually and he didn’t want what they had to end.

He pushed a Liam’s head, fingers sliding across the newly shorn hair and growling with a little frustration because he missed being able to grip his fingers into Liam’s curls. Stupid hazing prank at the firehouse. Stupid birthday head being the herald to the end of all relationships Harry’d ever had. Liam’s brow rose as he swirled his tongue around the crown of Harry’s dick and Harry’s eyes fluttered because Christ, was Liam good at this.

“No,” he whimpered, just as Liam smirked at the strangled groan Harry couldn’t repress, “Li, please, no.”

Liam pulled off, hand still slowly jacking Harry off and licked at his lips - smeared with spit and precome and he looked obscene and why was Harry stopping this again?

“What’s wrong?” Liam asked and his voice was a little bit thick, a little bit rough and Harry knew that sound. Knew that Liam had taken him deep the night before and now was paying for it and still giving Harry another go at the velvety heaven that was the inside of Liam’s mouth.

Harry threw his arm over his eyes, it would be easier to let Liam down gently not having to look at how utterly debauched Liam looked with his red, puffy lips and guileless big brown eyes staring all concerned in Harry’s direction.

“You can’t, you shouldn’t. I love you, you know?” Harry said, aware that he wasn’t making any sense but he was still trying to struggle with being turned on and Liam’s thumb brushing over the head of his dick.

“Shouldn’t what?” Liam asked, a hint of humor in his tone, “Shouldn’t suck you off? I don’t recall you ever turning down my mouth before,”

Harry smiled a little - it was true, Liam gave amazing head. “Yes,” he started and stopped with a moan because Liam had taken that one word to mean he could start sucking on Harry again. “No, Liam. Just -” he paused, pulling himself up the bed with a finesse he didn’t know he actually had.

“I don’t want to break up, alright!” Harry squawked, nearly kneeing Liam in the head as he rolled sideways to the side of the bed that they hardly used - mostly meeting in the middle to snuggle off to sleep and waking in similar spooned positions come morning. It was alright - they knew how extremely cheesy they were but - it worked for them. Two idiots in stupid love.

Well, had worked up until bloody Liam had to go and wake Harry up on his own birthday by sucking Harry off.

“What? Break up? What are - what are you on about?” Liam asked, his hand cool on Harry’s shoulder, still sleep warm from lying in their bed.

“Well I don’t know if it would happen this time. I mean, usually it’s my fault. A blowjob for your birthday and then three months later - no more boyfriend.”

“Harry - I’m. I’m not going anywhere. I just- can you just explain yourself maybe?” Liam tugged at Harry’s shoulder and Harry gave in after a second, turning back into Liam who guided them down onto the bed. Harry tucked himself into Liam’s side and didn’t bother to shift his wayward curls from where they lay across his face. A little hiding might be what he needed to get through this.

“So I may have not told you everything about my past relationships,” he started and Liam didn’t stop running his fingertips up and down Harry’s back so he continued, “Like, how they ended because even though I’m good at blow jobs,”

“Pretty decent, yeah,” Liam chimed in and Harry poked his nipple with his free hand until Liam grabbed at it, holding it tight.

“You’ve never complained before,” Harry mumbled and smiled a little as he felt Liam press his lips to the top of Harry’s head. “Anyway, so blow jobs, and birthdays have been a thing that haven’t worked for me? They’ve always been the start of the end for whoever I’ve been with and I don't want that. I don’t want that for us.”

Liam didn’t say anything, just kept up his smooth touch on Harry’s back and it was a little - well a little anti-climactic really.

“Harry, did you somehow miss that I was the one sucking you off?” Liam said with a patience that Harry’d only heard him use on a very drunk Louis or a completely sober class of reception children when they’d visited the fire house.

Harry buried his face in Liam’s side. “No, I didn’t. But it’s still your birthday and it’s still a blow job so it still could happen.”

“Harry, look - um, will you just come up here a minute? I really don’t think this is a conversation I want to have with the top of your head,”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Harry.”

“Liam.”

“Maybe your relationships all ended because you acted like a child-”

Harry sat up, “Me? I’m not a -” he started, all indignant only to have that fade immediately at the smug smirk that graced Liam’s lips.

“Hi,” Liam said and Harry pouted a little because obviously, this is what Liam had wanted.

“So you think that you’re cursed with ruining relationships through birthday blow jobs do you?” Liam said and if Harry hadn’t of been staring at him, he would have thought he was taking the mick.

“Maybe,” Harry mumbled, cheeks flushing hot because when Liam put it like that it really did sound ridiculous.

“Harry, I’m not going to break up with you. I’m not planning on breaking up with you, not even thinking about it as an option, really.”

“Yeah but, this is how it works, Li. I suck you and something embarrassing or stupid happens and then you dump me in a few months time and we might be friends like I am with Louis or you might fade into nothing like Nick but-” Harry is stopped by Liam’s fingers on his lips.

“But nothing. I’m not them. You aren’t the person you were with them. We’re us. I’m me and I want to give my boyfriend a blow job on my birthday because I’m rather fond of his cock and I really, really like sucking him off. So it’s my birthday treat and you, sir, are ruining it by being worried about some stupid curse.”

Harry feels his resolve crumbling a little with Liam’s words. He sounds so sure, so utterly certain that Harry’s wrong about this that maybe Harry might have to believe him.

“But what if-” Harry began, only to stop as Liam sits up, gripping Harry’s face in both hands.

“But what if I woke you up every day with my mouth on you and that way everyday won’t be different to today and it won’t matter anymore about birthdays or not?” Liam said, eyes crinkling at the corners in a way that Harry can imagine even more wrinkles there in the future. A future he wants with Liam. A future that he really doesn’t want special day blow jobs to screw up.

“But-”

“But what if nothing happens, what if in three months time we’re still together and laughing about this while we’re in Majorca on that holiday you talked about that I’ve already started planning with Perrie down at the travel agent?”

Harry can’t help but smile and feel something loosen in his chest, something burn up the cold that his heart was wrapped in. It feels a little bit like the love he always holds there for Liam taking over.

“But what if in a year and we’re still together I visit your mum and dad and ask them about maybe making you mine forever because it’s legal here now - well hopefully will be by then. What if I want to wake you up with blowjobs on my birthday until we’re so old I have my teeth in a cup beside yours on our dresser drawers?” Liam’s smiling at him now and Harry has to blink just to keep looking into Liam’s eyes.

Harry wasn’t crying. There weren’t tears in his eyes. It was just a speck of dust from the motes flying about in the rays of sunlight coming through the window above the bed - that was all.

“Well then,” he managed to mumble after clearing his throat a couple of times, “I’d tell you to get back on to it,”

If Liam happened to tackle Harry to the bed and get his mouth back to where it was before all the talk of curses and things came then it’s nobodies business but their own. If Harry also happened to be the loudest he’d ever been while Liam made good with all his “skills” - so much so that even Niall had to bang on the wall to tell them to keep it down - Harry didn’t much care.

He was getting his first birthday blowjob after all.

 

~ and they lived happily ever after ~

~ with birthday blowjobs for everyone ~

The End.