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Chapter Text

It’s all so confusing, suddenly the royal family is living in his territory and everything has changed, now multiple cities have palaces, museums, real universities and hospitals, botanic gardens and zoos.

Well, technically speaking, Brazil is no longer a colony. The ports are open, diplomacy is now a thing, it all happened in so little time, the personification of the former colony can’t even process what is happening. Brazil has always been there in the corners, even now Portugal still does all the important work for him, yet he still insists in bringing Luciano with him wherever he goes. 

Luciano has learnt how to speak eloquently, how to play the piano and the violin, how to show himself with grace and beauty, how to act like he was part of the game. However, he is aware of the way those called civilized men and women look at him, how he will never belong no matter how hard he tries. Like a stain that never comes off.

The only one that seems to think he belongs in those places with noble men is Afonso himself, the one who always brings Luciano to play music at parties. The one that always starts clapping when he finishes playing songs, making all the others clap as well.

Even if Brazil feels out of place in those parties, even though he can feel the scrutinizing stare of those people burning at his skin, he always plays with all his fury. After all, it’s a shattered heart that makes good art. To make sure that Portugal would be proud of him. He is the only one that looks at him as if he was an equal, they both know it isn’t true.

Nevertheless, those circumstances didn’t last for very long. It was almost summer in December 1815, and the State of Brazil was elevated to the status of kingdom, a united kingdom with Portugal with Rio de Janeiro as the capital. He was taken out of the shadow of Portugal, given a crown for himself.

“Portugal… What’s happening? What is everyone preparing?” Luciano inquires after noticing it seems like everyone in the palace is preparing for something big.

Afonso turns around, slightly startled by the younger nation’s question, probably not expecting that he would be there, but soon he smiles.

“Oh, querido, no one told you yet? Let's talk, alright?” he responds, his hand moving to Luciano’s back and guiding him to an empty corridor. 

“So what’s happening? Another party?”

“Yes, but it’s more than that.” Afonso sighs, holding Luciano’s shoulders, “Do you remember when I married Spain?” he grimaces when he remembers that.

“Yes, the Iberian Union, I remember that, it was a weird time… Why?” Luciano raises a dark eyebrow.

“Listen, Brazil…” he sighs again, “Now that we are a united kingdom we are going to get married.”

Those news are so shocking to Brazil that he jumps in place, his plump lips opening in a gasp, he steps back.

“What?! Marry you?!!” he yells, “You are an old man! Look at your expression lines, why do I need to marry you? The United Kingdom in Great Britain didn’t do that!”

“Of course not, the logistics of marrying that many nations together would be a nightmare.” Portugal says simply, until he notices Brazil called him old, “Also I am not that old!”

Luciano shakes his head, stepping back once more. Luciano was deeply aware that their weird “brotherhood” was just a formality, he never thought about Afonso romantically, not that has thought about romance all that much anyway, Portugal wouldn’t allow him to do that. 

“Luciano…” he calls the younger one by his human name, “This means nothing, it’s just a symbolic marriage.”

“I bet you didn’t think that when you married Spain.” he rebuttals with spite.

“That is different, Spain is a bastard.” Afonso rolls his eyes, but then he steps closer and picks up Luciano’s hands, “I won’t do that to you.”

Luciano waits a few seconds, looking at Afonso’s hands holding his hands, his hands are more calloused, they look older in comparison to Luciano’s hands, he has been alive for so long. The younger nation pouts his lips and looks away.

“I guess I can trust you, but I won’t be your little wife!”

Just a few days later, Brazil ate his words. He ordered for him a new coat that looked very feminine, light cream and golden with puff sleeves and a bow in front. It looks very beautiful on him, the light colours look flattering with his dark skin and black hair, but he knows this is supposed to put him in the position of a soon-to-be-wife. 

He sighs, deciding to put on his white gloves. “Just a symbolic marriage” he thinks, is it fair? Brazil knows that mortals rarely have the chance to marry for love, so why would he have that chance? 

He looks at his reflection in the mirror, putting a pin in his wavy hair, at least, he looks pretty, more than those pasty assholes that think they are better than he is. How does Portugal actually see him? He isn’t sure, he knows the older nation is a bit paranoid and overwhelmingly protective of Brazil, but what does this actually mean?

Stepping out of his room, Luciano tries to look confident. He has always been in the corner, not doing anything, but being a shy reminder of the reality of his people. Always kept away from everything and everyone, Afonso repeatedly made sure to protect him from everything, to not let him think profoundly about how nothing made much sense. 

Even with his lies, Luciano stops when he sees Afonso, he can’t help to look down and act less confident near him, it is an unconscious act. Maybe it is because, despite Afonso never being aggressive to him, he knows that Afonso could do that… That he could snap and treat him badly as well.

“Oh, hi, Brazil.” Portugal turns to face him, his green eyes widening, but soon he laughs, “They actually made you wear that, you look like a beautiful lady.”

“Say that again and I will punch your teeth out of your mouth…” Brazil crosses his arms, saying that, but everyone can tell there is no bite behind those words.

“I mean it, you look pretty!” Afonso insists, holding his hand to kiss it.

Luciano feels his face warming up, no, he can’t let himself be charmed by Afonso's playful words and actions, he knows he doesn’t mean it, he is just playing around. But he always falls for his charm and friendliness.

“Quit this, are you going to act like there is something happening between us, velho?” he doesn’t try to make Afonso let go of his hands.

“Something is happening… It may not be the same thing as before, but something is happening.” and yet, he lets go of Luciano’s hands, “I have already told you how much it pained me to not be officially your older brother any more!”

Luciano thinks “If the end of the colonial pact is enough to make it all be over, then you were never my brother in the first place”, however his lips stay closed, he knows better than truly speak his mind. 

“I know…” he replies instead, rubbing his own arm in a self-soothing action, “I don’t know if I like it either.”

Afonso notices how Luciano seems uncomfortable, he pats the younger nation’s wavy hair and brings him closer to kiss his forehead.

“Why are you so quiet today, Brazil?”

As Afonso holds him, Luciano thinks about what he should say, he ends up letting honesty leave his lips.

“Things are changing so fast… I feel like I didn’t have time to comprehend it all.” 

“I see… You can always talk to me, querido.” Afonso leans in, his hand now on Luciano’s face.

“I am sorry…”

Despite those sweet words, how Afonso’s worried and kind expression, Luciano doubts that this love is unconditional, that Afonso won’t love him when he isn’t his pure boy. That’s why he has been shielding Luciano off everything, never talking about reality, avoiding or lying, pretending Luciano has no will of his own, so he can have control… Yet, Luciano knows Afonso’s love is authentic, it may not be unconditional, but it is real. 

Nevertheless, Luciano leans over, laying his head on Afonso’s shoulder, feeling his warmth and comfort. He fears Portugal, he fears his rage that he has seen directed to others, but he is the only one Brazil has, the only one that seems to not hate or resent his existence. So Luciano will avoid being honest as much as he can or at least tell half-truths…

“Can I play piano for you? I am composing a new song… I want your opinion.” he changes subjects to feel less awkward.

“Of course! Maybe you should sing a song to me as well. You know I love hearing your voice.” Afonso’s fingers play with his dark locks of hair, he always does that, like one would do to a cat. 

“Of course, you do.” Luciano smiles at him as they start waking together to the room where the piano is.

Chapter Text

The wedding day happens a few days after New Year's Eve, and Brazil feels like throwing up with all those judgmental eyes on him, he is wearing the cream coat once more, they even put golden accessories on his hair. They are standing in the altar, in front of the priest, and Portugal is smiling so much. His ears are ringing, he just wants this to be over. Is that how Portugal felt while marrying Spain?

As Luciano says his vows that he has memorized the day before, he feels like he can’t recognize his own voice, it is timid and small, he doubts anyone, but Afonso and the priest can listen to him. He doesn’t usually speak so shyly, he is a singer after all, however he can’t bring himself to do better. 

Luciano just feels himself coming back to reality when he feels Afonso leaning in to kiss him, his eyes getting wide and then closing. It was such a quick kiss, but it startled him anyway.

“You look absolutely adorable right now… But you need to smile.” Afonso whispers to Luciano after separating the kiss, he holds his hand and leans back. 

Staring back at the crowd witnessing the wedding, Portugal grins, waving his hand happily as they start leaving the altar, he squeezes Brazil’s hand, trying to make him look happy. He forces his lips to curve into a smile and waves his hand too.

After that they would do what they typically do for any royal marriage, they would celebrate it with a large and expensive party, a big elaborate ritual that just the important people could get. Luciano felt bored, after all this time he can’t distract himself by playing music and pretend no one is actually there. 

Portugal has invited some nations to the wedding party, mostly the ones that supported Portugal during the Napoleonic Wars that had just finished last year. Some were known faces, England, Spain, Netherlands, Uruguay, others were new faces like Russia, Austria, and Sweden. Despite the invitation, Sweden hadn’t come. 

The first one that comes to congratulate them is England. He smiles, his large eyebrows moving upwards, his light green eyes stare at Portugal for a while, then he looks at Brazil. Arthur Kirkland looks like he tried to tame his blond hair and failed miserably. Luciano can’t help, but laugh softly at that one hair lock that is sticking out from the side of his head.

“My friend, what a nice wedding you two had! I am a bit jealous!” England says, “Maybe if I had done this with America…”

“Oh, my dear, it is too late to think about that, isn’t it?” Portugal says softly, shaking his head.

“Oh, yes…” Arthur stops a servant to get some wine and drinks it all in one go like it was nothing “Really a beautiful wedding, my dear friend… Congratulations to you two.” he pats Luciano’s hair and Afonso’s back before following another servant to get more wine.

Next, Spain and Austria come together to talk with them. Spain laughs and Austria looks neutral, yet polite. 

“Ah, primo, finally you look happy in a marriage!” Antonio says, almost bitter, and Luciano notices Roderich poke Antonio with an annoyed stare.

Luciano frowns, feeling a bit free to tell him something, after all he remembers the Iberian Union days way too well.

“Maybe it’s because he isn’t marrying you.” he says defensively, and Afonso laughs.

“Are you still mad about that, niño?!”

“Yes, you made him cry and you hit him!” Luciano tries to step closer, but Roderich interrupts their conflict.

“Congratulations, your vows were quite beautiful. I heard you play the piano, Brazil.” 

A soft sigh of surprise comes out of his lips, someone finally asks him something that is somewhat personal, Luciano can’t help but nod enthusiastically.

“I also sing and play the violin!” he says.

“Oh, how interesting. How did you learn all that?” he smiles and Luciano understands why everyone talks about Austria, he is quite pleasant to look at, nevertheless, Luciano knows that Afonso has quite the negative opinion of Roderich.

“I was bored and I love music so…”

“We should talk more, shouldn’t we?”

“Of course!” 

“That's enough.” Afonso makes a hand gesture to end the conversation, holding Luciano’s shoulders. 

Roderich rolls his eyes, murmuring something in German, he grabs Antonio’s arm and walks away, Spain looks mildly perplexed. 

“That Austrian, always using his looks to seem like a good man!” Portugal starts ranting.

“Oh, you’re feeling jealous?” Brazil asks, chuckling, “I just wanted to talk about music.”

“I know you do, but I don’t trust him, he wants to marry anything he sees. You’re too much of a good boy for that type of person.” 

With those words, Luciano feels his cheeks warming up, despite knowing he isn’t exactly the innocent creature Afonso thinks he is, he doesn’t mind being called good…

Their alone time is disrupted when they feel a cold presence behind them, as big hands touch their shoulders.

“I have never been invited to a nation wedding before!” that’s an accent Luciano has never heard beforehand, he looks up at the nation behind them.

“I-I forgot I invited you, Russia…” oh, Russia made Portugal’s voice tremble, Brazil already likes this guy.

“Are you Russia? You’re so big!” Luciano turns around, looking directly at Ivan’s eyes with no fear, unlike Afonso.

“Da…” somehow, staring made the big guy uncomfortable, he hides his face partially behind his scarf, his face getting red.

Then Ivan runs away and Afonso becomes utterly confused, but he starts laughing.

“Well, that was interesting! I will remember that.”

One of the positive aspects of this marriage was interacting directly with nations. Unlike humans, they were more likely to direct a few words to Luciano, and it felt nice to have more nations to talk with. Brazil hopes that he can make more friends one day.

It is the mortals from important positions that bring him pain, they never even look at him. When they come to congratulate the marriage, they only refer to Portugal, because to them Brazil is just an object that Portugal owns. A thing that can be shaped into different positions, a younger brother, a servant, a loyal wife.

He feels more and more frustration with every human that comes to talk with Portugal, the only ones giving Brazil attention are the servants, and it is just because they need to, isn’t it? When they go eat together and Brazil notices Uruguay is there.

“Uruguay, you are here!” Luciano seems happy to see Sebastián, sitting down with him.

“Well, I am part of your territory, am I not?” he says, almost looking a bit unsure “You look different… You are dressed like a girl.”

“I am wearing pants!” Luciano argues, yet he isn’t offended, “But those sleeved and the bow give my coat the feminine flairs. Do you like it?” he twirls in place playfully.

“I guess so… It is pr-”

Sebastián stops talking when they notice Afonso staring at them with a smile, his eyes almost closed. That wasn’t a nice smile, it was the one that meant “stop now”. Sebastián changes chairs immediately, and Luciano feels a bit confused. Why is Afonso acting so weird?

When the party is over, Afonso brings Luciano to his room. Luciano feels tired, it is getting late, so he wishes to be asleep. The older nation holds him by the arms, scared he would try to leave.

“Luciano.” he is surprised when Afonso suddenly calls him by his human name, that’s not usual.

“Yes…”

Afonso frowns, he looks suddenly upset.

“I don’t like seeing you interacting with other nations… What if they try taking you away from me?”

Luciano’s expression softens. This obsessive feeling Afonso has for control, to keep it all in line, he is so used to it by now, that for Luciano that is just how Afonso loves him, although it hurts sometimes. He needs to keep himself controlled, so Afonso will always love him, no matter the cost, he can’t make Afonso feel hatred towards him.

“Ah, but you know they can’t do that…” Luciano’s hands move up to undo Afonso’s ponytail and play with his long hair.

“They can… They are new, more interesting than me, who you already know.” he says, sounding pitiful.

“I would never abandon you, Afonso.” Luciano kisses his cheek. 

This is when Afonso stares at him, the green eyes expressing a feeling Luciano can’t exactly identify, and suddenly Afonso kisses his lips. Luciano remembers that he told him nothing between them would change after the marriage… 

Luciano gasps during the kiss, his eyes wide open in confusion, Afonso didn’t need to kiss him after the wedding ceremony. This is the same man who held his hand and slept with him when he had a nightmare. What should he think about this? Luciano has never experienced this attention before, he feels butterflies in his belly, his eyes slowly closing as he lets Afonso kiss him. 

Why did he lie again, though?

His body moves on his own, he holds Afonso’s hair, getting closer to him, he wants more from him, but he doesn’t know how to ask. Since the beginning Luciano has been taught to control and leave his desires to the side, to hide them in the name of God, even though it seemed like no one was doing that, not even Afonso.

Afonso leans back, separating their lips and Luciano tries to think about something to say, he caresses Luciano’s face and smiles.

“You have such soft lips, don’t you, querido?”

“I do…” his voice sounds so soft again.

“Did you like the kiss, Luciano?”

This time, Luciano nods enthusiastically, despite his confused feeling on the matter he wants to be loved more and more, Afonso is the only one that will give him love. Afonso chuckles and wraps his arms around Luciano like a trap.

“You said you would never abandon me, I believe in you, you are mine, aren’t you?” he whispers, his voice sending chills down Luciano’s spine, he isn’t sure if likes this.

“Yes.”

“Good boy. I love you.” Afonso pats his head, one of his hands starts opening Luciano’s coat.

Luciano smiles, yet, at the same time, he feels like he wants to scream, something is wrong, but he is willing to forget it, after all Afonso is smiling at him and embracing him lovingly… Why would he want to ruin this moment by complaining?

Chapter Text

The morning sun shines at Luciano’s face, eventually waking him up, he is just wearing his shirt and feeling tired, despite sleeping the whole night. Afonso is sleeping next to him, just covered by the bed’s sheets. He sits up, looking at the window. It was sunny, but summer never forgives anyone when those clouds in the sky bring sudden rain. Unforgiving, like everything in life.

Brazil looks at Portugal again, he grows suddenly sick again… Once again things are changing way too quickly, even if he enjoyed how Portugal held him, even he enjoyed being loved like he has always dreamt about, it doesn't feel quite right. Perhaps, he would have appreciated it if Portugal took it more slowly. Maybe then he would end up less sickly.

After wasting time just looking at his husband (and yes, that word feels weird), he stands up silently, not wanting to wake Afonso up. Luciano feels a bit sore, and it triggers his nervousness to explode into tears. Why does he feel regret? Doesn’t he love Afonso? He is the only one Luciano has! No, he loves him, even if he is sometimes scared of him. 

Luciano turns his body to gaze at his husband again. Afonso has been so kind to him, he has never screamed at him, nor has he ever hit him, he should be grateful. Despite all his attempts to halt his crying, the tears leave his eyes anyway, he can’t understand why he feels like he is going to die, he is immortal! 

Without a deeper thought, Brazil runs off the room, not carrying that he is just wearing a shirt to cover himself, he just doesn’t want Portugal to see him break down. Unfortunately, he sees someone in the hallway, it is Uruguay.

“Brazil, why are you crying?” the other nation looks worried to see the other crying while dressed like that.

“I don’t know! I don’t know what’s wrong with me!” 

Luciano shakes his head, not understanding why he is being so dramatic, he loves Afonso… Does he feel betrayed that Afonso lied to him that their relationship would not change? But he enjoyed having sex with him! It makes no sense at all.

“Did Portugal do something to you?” Sebastián touches Luciano’s arm.

“DON’T TOUCH ME!” Luciano yells at him, slapping his hand and getting increasingly more overwhelmed by this situation. 

Sebastián steps back, surprised by the sudden aggression from Luciano, he adjusts his glasses and cleans his throat.

“Alright, sorry… No touching.” he agrees awkwardly, however he tries to sound calm, “Do you want me to help you then?”

“I feel confused… About my feelings.” he confesses. 

“Your feelings about this marriage? Portugal doesn’t seem to be acting like this is just a political marriage, does he?” Sebastián questions, frowning his eyebrows and crossing his arms.

“He doesn’t, that’s for sure, or do you think I am undressed for no reason at all?” Luciano sounds a bit harsh.

“I know, I know, I am just confirming it… Did he hurt you? You can tell me.”

“No… Not at all, he was very gentle with me.” Luciano sounds embarrassed, why is he being so exaggerated? What’s wrong with him?

“He must have upset you if you were crying, Brazil!” Uruguay persists.

“No! I just feel upset for no reason…” It feels like a lie to say that, but it is the logical explanation for it.

With those words, Brazil hears Uruguay sighing in frustration, he opens his mouth to say something, but he doesn’t speak, they hear the sounds of shoes coming in their direction. Brazil doesn’t need to turn around to recognize who it is, he knows the way he walks, he feels his hand on his neck. 

“Good morning, you two, I see you are talking about me.” Portugal says, his fingers caressing his skin.

“We were.” Uruguay affirms, “Brazil isn’t feeling well.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that then, Uruguay, I will take care of him.” Portugal dismisses Uruguay, who reluctantly leaves, “What are you feeling, Luciano?”

His hand is still on his neck, Luciano turns around and hugs Afonso, hiding his face on Afonso’s shoulder.

“I am sorry, I felt too overwhelmed.” Luciano explains himself when Afonso hasn’t asked him anything.

“About what, meu amor?” Afonso guides Luciano back to his bedroom.

The words come to his mind, but Luciano doesn’t let them get out, he feels Afonso’s hand on his, and it seals the words on the back of his mind to be never said.

“It is all so new…” he says, however, he still wonders what else Afonso is willing to lie about.

“Oh, I see…” the older nation sighs, almost annoyed, “Didn’t you like last night? You seemed to be enjoying yourself even more than I was.”

“No, no, I loved it!” Luciano widens his eyes, “I just… I just don’t know how to feel about it now.” 

“You didn’t seem to be thinking about that yesterday, so why does it matter now?”

There isn’t a single memory of Luciano where Afonso sounded so cold when talking to him, it hurts more than he expected. All his bittersweet memories suddenly felt more bitter than sweet.

“I am sorry, it doesn’t matter…” he says, trying to not cry once more.

“Don’t cry, you are not a child any more.” Afonso responds, but his voice softens, noticing he hurt Luciano’s feelings, “You have always been so emotional, I can’t imagine what you would do without me.”

Shaking his head, Portugal’s free hand goes to Brazil’s face, the same hands that have comforted him in the past, that have taught him so much, that have carried him around and now have become his husband’s hands. Brazil closes his eyes, reflecting about what Portugal is saying… Without him, what would it feel like to be independent? Would he be able to be someone without Portugal? 

“I can’t imagine it either…”

They say that the apple never falls far from the tree, it is true for them as well. Luciano has thoughts about Afonso’s lies, and yet, he is also a liar. He can imagine what it would be like to be free, and he feels guilty for desiring that. 

“You should get dressed for us to eat breakfast, Brazil.” Afonso interrupts Luciano’s thoughts.

“Oh, of course… Are the other nations still here? Are we going to eat with them?” the younger nation asks, interested and going to find his clothes from yesterday. 

“Yes, they are going to stay until the end of the week.” Portugal sounds displeased again.

Brazil doesn’t question why Portugal is so frustrated at having guests over, because Brazil is definitely excited about that, maybe he can make more friends.

“Do you think America will send us a letter? He became our friend last year.” 

“I hope it is just a letter…” Portugal says with not a very pleasant expression.

“You really don’t like him, huh? I wanted to invite him.” Luciano sits down to put on his shoes.

“No, I don’t like him. That young man was talking too much to you, and he is too arrogant for a country that was born yesterday. He isn’t a good influence for you!” he taps his feet on the ground.

For some reason, Luciano kind of finds this funny, what is Afonso so scared of? He wouldn’t mind talking to Alfred again, he was funny and a bit weird, but he could feel some kinship to him.

“You are worrying too much.” he giggles.

“I am just trying to protect you like I have always done.” 

“What are you scared of? Of me leaving you somehow? It is not possible for me to do that.” Luciano stands up, his hands on his own hips.

“No, I am scared of the other nations taking advantage of your naivety.” Afonso says, stepping closer and holding Luciano’s arm, so they can leave the room.

It is that again, this perceived purity that Luciano isn’t sure is real, he is surely inexperienced in life, after all Afonso hasn’t allowed him to do much, but innocent? Naive? 

“I wasn’t an innocent boy in your eyes yesterday.” the words leave his lips without a warning.

Afonso stops walking, his head turning to Luciano slowly.

“What do you mean?”

“If you thought I was so pure and innocent that I could be tainted by anything, you wouldn’t have taken my virginity, would you?” Luciano’s curiosity is stronger than his fear this time so he allows himself to ask questions.

“It is different, Luciano, I am your husband, I can do that.” Afonso looks away, his cheeks getting red.

“Well, you told me nothing would change between us…” perhaps Afonso was right and Alfred was a powerful bad influence on Luciano that just mentioning his name made him feel like speaking up all of a sudden.

“I don’t remember saying that… I still love you, now like a spouse, so I don’t think anything has changed.” Afonso refuses to look at Luciano.

Do I really believe in those words?

This leaves Luciano to feel like he is being hysterical, exactly like he has thought he was being. Afonso never meant to hurt him, he just misunderstood his words. For him, nothing has changed, even though it feels like a tornado messed up Luciano's whole life. 

“I see… I love you too.” he tells him, laying his head on his shoulder.

“I know, querido.” Afonso finally looks at him, smiling, “Let's go eat then, you must be hungry, aren’t you?” he moves Luciano’s bangs off his face.

“Yes, of course.” Brazil isn’t really all that hungry, he is just quite excited to get out of the bedroom and perhaps see all the other nations once more, maybe talking with them all by himself. 

They leave the room together, Brazil holding Portugal’s arm as they walk side by side on the fancy corridors of the palace. The walls feel so unnatural to Brazil because he doesn’t feel like he should be there with it. Yet he feels his face laying on Portugal’s shoulder, feeling his warmth, he can close his eyes. Luciano trusts that, even with all his faults, Afonso would never let him down.

Chapter Text

The breakfast is a bit awkward, most of them eat in silence, at the same time that Portugal and England chat enthusiastically while sharing a bottle of wine, Brazil doesn’t think England needs more wine. Brazil uses his fork to play with the cake on his plate, why is everyone remaining quiet?

The one sitting by his side is Uruguay, who sometimes gives Brazil discreet looks of concern, he didn’t mean to make him worried with his stupid drama earlier. Suddenly, he feels Sebastián touch his hand under the table, like he was trying to give Luciano his quiet comfort. Sebastián is too smart to do that while Afonso is watching.

Not knowing exactly how to react, Luciano decides to look at Sebastián and smile, before making him let go of his hand, not waiting to raise any suspicion accidentally for no reason.

When Luciano looks back to Afonso, he gets sort of mad at how close he and Arthur are getting, he is pretty aware how desperate Afonso is for Arthur’s attention, but he tries to ignore this jealousy. He can’t compete with someone that was there even before Brazil existed. 

Brazil eats his cake, trying not to look at Portugal and feel hurt by him. He stares at the other nations on the table. Austria seems a bit angry, while Spain is grinning at him. Netherlands is sitting on the side of England and seems a bit annoyed around Portugal and England, maybe because they were being too loud. Russia is just observing everything with a weird smile on his face.

Luciano drinks his coffee, he wants to talk to someone new, so either Roderich or Ivan will do. Ivan was funny yesterday, so why not? After all, Afonso seems so busy with Arthur. He stands up and goes to sit on the empty chair next to Ivan. Afonso notices this, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh, hi, Brazil…” the smile disappears from Ivan’s face, his cheeks getting red.

“You are very shy.” Luciano points out, “I don’t recall Portugal really talking much about you before.”

“We aren’t close at all.” Ivan scratches his face.

“I know, he just invited you because you were in the sixth coalition.” Luciano explains and Ivan nods agreeing, that’s a bit awkward, however this doesn’t kill his curiosity, “Why are you wearing a scarf? It is very warm today! You are sweating like a pig.”

“Da… It is very hot and sunny here, it is so nice, it is very different from where I live.”

“You should take this scarf and use better fabrics, maybe cotton.” Luciano touches Ivan’s coat and the guy seems to get more embarrassed.

“I like wearing my scarf.” Ivan plays with the fabric, “You don’t seem intimidated by me, I am not used to that.”

“Why should I be scared of you? I can’t think of a reason, Russia.” Brazil chuckles, his eyes go back to Portugal, who is staring at him fiercely, “You don’t look like you would hurt me…”

“But I can.”

“I can tell you won’t.” Brazil sighs, not being able to deal with Portugal’s hostile stare, “Maybe we can talk more later…”

Luciano glimpses once more at Ivan, before standing up and going back to his chair next to Afonso, who is tapping his fingers on the table and following Luciano with his green eyes.

“Are you doing this to provoke me?” Afonso whispers just to Luciano, holding his arm.

“No…” Luciano says a bit ashamed, “I just wanted to be polite with our guests.”

“I told you yesterday how I feel about all of this…” his voice drops into a saddened tone, which makes Luciano feel ashamed of himself.

“I know… I just wanted to be nice to our guests, that’s all. And you were busy talking to England.” he responds, uncertain of himself.

“We will talk about this later.”

Afonso watches Luciano sit down, looking down at his own lap, Ivan is staring at the situation. Portugal’s fists close up, Brazil is involving more nations in their situation, and he dares to look so innocent while doing it. He should know better by now.

In a swift motion, Afonso takes the wine cup from Arthur’s hand and drinks it all. Arthur reacts with a confused noise, but he drunkenly laughs.

“Your wine is worth a lot of wars, isn’t it?” his friend laughs.

“Shut the fuck up, England.” 

“Oh…?”

Why is everything and everyone trying to annoy him? Since France attacked him and the royal family was forced to move to Brazil, nothing has been doing well. He can feel himself feeling sick, the king can lie all he wants, but Portugal knows by instinct that his people aren’t okay and the opening of Brazil isn’t good for his economy. 

Lies can’t make him stop coughing blood in the morning. They can’t stop looking older each year that passes, even though he tries his best to hide those issues.

His green eyes fall on Luciano once more, his expression getting harsher against his will. Afonso wishes he could feel nothing but affection towards Luciano, he loves him dearly, the light of his eyes… His sweet boy that he wants to protect from everything, and yet, so much of his stress comes from Luciano.

Portugal depends on Brazil way more than the opposite and now that that colony isn’t a colony this balance has been disrupted economically, Portugal has heard from the king himself he sees no future in Portugal any more. Despite that, Afonso wants desperately to keep the sense of normalcy, to have Luciano look up to him and respect him like he has always done. 

The night before when he had sex with Luciano, he wasn’t as patient as Luciano deserved, he wasn’t trying to avoid hurting him, thankfully what he did was enough and Luciano was strong enough to take it. Afonso didn’t want to admit it to himself, however he felt some type of satisfaction to see Luciano whimpering under him, while being at his mercy. 

At least he had control over Luciano over again… Even if he wasn’t planning to do so, it was so difficult when Luciano looked at him that way. He shakes his head and drinks more wine, he can’t allow himself to think about that at the dining room table. 

“You are making an unpleasant face, Portugal.” Netherlands says suddenly.

“You are one to talk, you are always serious.” Portugal smirks, turning his attention to the Netherlands. 

England interrupts the two by taking the cup from Portugal and filling it up his cup.

“Why are you feeling cranky now, friend? This isn’t like you.” Arthur asked.

“He is angry that Brazil was talking to Russia.” Abel says the quiet part out loud, “He is very possessive, I would know.”

“Shut up, you invaded my territory, if you aren’t careful I will beat you up again!” 

“I doubt it, Portugal.” he leans back on his chair and deep down Afonso knows he won’t do anything.

The table starts to be filled with the murmur of voices, and Portugal is just staring at his napkin. But as the host, he needs to regain his posture, he straightens his back and stands up.

“My dear friends and allies, maybe we should enjoy a bit of music, shouldn’t we? Brazil plays the piano and violin beautifully.” he smiles and looks at Brazil.

In response, Brazil seems startled, he stands up, then his plump lips curve into a smile, his dark eyes shining, he nods. After everyone agrees with it, they walk to the room where the piano is, and Portugal notices that Brazil’s hands are shaking from the anticipation. 

Luciano sits down on the piano to play the melodies his fingers know like second nature. He plays all the classic songs Europeans prefer, the classics. Eventually, Afonso notices the music changing to what he identifies to be Luciano’s compositions, and he starts finally paying attention to the sounds, to Luciano’s serene expression, to his fingers moving like it was nothing.

Listening to Luciano play always calmed his heart, it made him feel less sick, like everything around him actually had just disappeared. Before all of this, his “little brother’s” mere presence was enough to put Afonso at easy, everything has changed so quickly.

When Brazil stops playing, Portugal moves his hands up to start clapping first like he always does, but someone starts clapping before him, it is Austria, who seems extremely pleased, such a rare event. Immediately. Portugal starts frowning when he watches Austria walking closer to Brazil and holding one of his hands.

“I thought Portugal was exaggerating when talking about your musical talents!” he exclaims, and Afonso regrets deeply making a passing comment about Luciano’s talents.

“Oh, thank you, Austria.” Luciano is a bit surprised, he smiles. 

“You would love Vienna.”

Antonio gets closer to Afonso and whispers to him.

“Afonso, you are making a face… Are you jealous?” in response, Afonso discreetly pinches Antonio’s side, which just makes him laugh, “Don’t worry, Austria is very busy with me.” he gets pinched again, “Ouch, primo, that one hurts!”

Spain goes to Austria and says something to him that makes Austria let go of Brazil’s hand and go to a corner with Spain. When Portugal sees the disappointment in Brazil’s face, he feels a drop of guilt, but it is mostly relief that Brazil is alone again.

This relief doesn’t last long, Uruguay goes near Brazil to talk with him. He doesn’t know why he is worried about Sebastián; he won’t dare to do anything that could put himself in risk. Yet, Afonso can’t help but feel anger when he sees how close he is to Luciano, his hand on Luciano’s arm, the worried look in his eyes. 

Luciano looks at Afonso, at least he knows at whom he should be looking, eventually he will learn to behave once more, hopefully. 

In the afternoon, Afonso has the opportunity to bring Luciano to his room and talk to him. He notices Luciano seems somewhat scared of him, even though he tries to hide it. This makes Afonso feel awful deep down, he wants Luciano to respect him, he can use a bit of fear for that, even if it feels wrong.

“Luciano, you are scared because you know you did something wrong.” he says, caressing his hair.

“I am sorry… I just wanted to be nice, because no one was talking to him.” he repeats his excuse insecurely.

“I already told you that I fear you getting hurt.” Portugal touches his cheek and feels the way he leans in on his hand, “But you know I always forgive you.”

“I know…” Brazil looks down.

“Good boy.”

In a swift movement, Luciano lifts his head and connects their lips, grabbing Afonso’s coat. Afonso gasps, opening his lips and deepening the kiss, while he holds Luciano in his arms and pulling him even closer.

There is something in the back of his mind that wonders if he should have started this type of relationship with Luciano, however he has been thinking about it for a while… Maybe the consequences of his loneliness and tendency to isolate himself are finally making him act irrational. 

Abruptly, Portugal has to stop the kiss, because of a horrible burning feeling that comes from his throat, he pushes Brazil to the side and picks up a handkerchief from his pocket to cough the blood in.

“Afonso!”  immediately the young nation showed panic, Portugal didn’t want Brazil to see that, “What is happening?!”

Afonso feels Luciano’s hands on him, and it makes him snap and push Luciano brutally.

“Nothing, it is nothing. Go to your room!”

“But… You’re coughing up blood!” 

“LUCIANO DA SILVA, LEAVE ME ALONE!”

The next thing he hears is Luciano’s hesitant steps as he leaves Afonso’s room and closes the door. Afonso looks at the bloody handkerchief and shakes his head, it was more blood than last time.