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Chapter Text

Nancy Wheeler graduated top of her class at Hawkins High in 1986, and now in 1989, she was planning to do the same at Emerson College. Ever since she was thirteen, all Nancy cared about was college. Everything about it excited her. The bustling academic buildings, the rush of new people and finding your life-long person, the absolute freedom that being 900 miles away from her parents meant for her. 

It was the single driving force in her life up until she walked across the stage, shook the hand of someone she barely knew, and felt her high school diploma in her hands. The weight of the last five years could have sunk her into the ground, but she had to stay on track. She had to walk off the stage, soak in the three months of summer, pack up the last eighteen years of her life into her Mercury, and get to Boston in one piece. 

And she did just that. 

The first month was hard; she had never been outside of Indiana, much less half the country away. She promised her mother she’d write every week and call every other day, but that slowly slipped out of her hands as her classes started picking up. They still talked on the phone once a week, but her letters were coming up few and far between. Mike, being sixteen then and angsty as ever, rarely got on the phone. But when he did, Nancy swore she could hear him smile through the receiver. Holly sent her drawings every once in a while, usually ones depicting the whole family together. It broke Nancy’s heart in two, to say the least. She didn’t hear much from her father, only getting occasional letters saying ‘keep those grades up’ accompanied by a check for twenty dollars. 

In her freshman year, Nancy learned that she actually did like school. Not that she ever thought she truly didn’t, but when the only thing you wanted to do is get out of the one church town you’ve lived in your whole life, you kind of have to be good at school. But now, here, where her classes are rigorous and make her think more than she ever has, Nancy Wheeler can confidently say she likes school. 

Everything was going well for Nancy in her new life. 

And then her mother called her one day. It was late November, and Nancy had been studying for her upcoming exams when her RA knocked on her door and explained that her mother was on the floor phone asking for her. 

The worst thoughts consumed Nancy’s mind- was Nana in the hospital again? Did Holly get into another fight with a snot-nosed kid on the playground? Was Mike hurt? Nancy answered the phone apprehensively, scratching at the back of her neck, “Hey mom, what’s going on? Is everything okay?” Her mother laughed at that, and Nancy sighed out a breath of relief, because if Karen was laughing, then everything was okay. 

“Oh honey, everything’s fine! I’m sorry for giving you a scare, I was just calling because I have an idea for you…” The silence filled Nancy’s head as she shifted from one foot to the other, “I think you should join a sorority. On campus.” And Nancy scoffed at that. 

A sorority? With a bunch of girls who don’t care about academics or politics, and care too much about boys and partying? Yeah, no thanks, Nancy thought. 

Karen tsked, “Now Nancy, I think it would be so great for you. You could go to on-campus events, volunteer in the community, and even make some friends.” 

Using her free hand, Nancy wrapped her arm around her middle, “I have friends, mom…” and if it came out sounding like a whimper rather than a declaration, that was nobody’s business. 

“Nancy, I haven’t heard you talk about a single friend since you arrived. I think it would be a good idea, just look into it.” 

She did. And now nearly three years later, about to start her senior year, Nancy Wheeler is the new president of the Delta Phi Epsilon chapter at Emerson, has two best friends, Max and El, and is set to be graduating at the top of her class in the spring. 

Nancy never really had a “best friend” in high school. She had friends in class, and people she met through writing for the paper, none of which ever turned into a best friend. 

Nancy wasn’t sure how she went this long without one. 

El and Nancy lived on the same floor their freshman year and would see each other in the hall or while brushing their teeth in the communal bathroom, but didn’t officially talk until they both rushed for DPhiE that spring. Their friendship budded faster than Nancy ever thought one could, suddenly only seeing each other while getting mail turned into all-weekend sleepovers and spending hours in the library. El is from Indiana too, just two hours south of Hawkins. They both opened their bid letters on Nancy’s carpeted floor, and screamed so loud the RA had to check on them. 

While in one of her journalism classes sophomore year, Nancy met Max. They hit it off immediately, Max commenting on the idiotic boys in their class and Nancy agreeing giddily. Max is from California, and Nancy wondered why the hell anyone would want to leave the golden state for bitterly cold Boston. Nancy introduced Max to El, and the three girls became inseparable in no time. They were the first people at Emerson she came out to as a lesbian, and she had never felt so loved. 

Nancy was happy. She was so happy. The sorority introduced her to so many amazing people, allowed her to volunteer at the local children's hospital, and actually enjoy her time in college. The president before Nancy was much more lax on drinking and parties and commencing with the fraternity. Not that Nancy was completely against drinking or parties, but she didn’t feel it was always appropriate. She was there to focus on school, to figure out what she wanted to do with her life, to make something of these four years. 

That doesn’t mean she didn’t have her fun, though. 

It was at her first Sigma Chi (the fraternity on campus) party of her sophomore year that Nancy decided she detested frat guys. They reeked of cheap beer and old weed, stalked around freshman girls like a predator eyeing its prey, and all had the same swoopy hairstyle that was not working for them. 

But, they knew how to throw exceptionally good parties. 

It was also at her first Sigma Chi party that Nancy decided she hated Robin Buckley. 

Maybe hate is a strong word, but the feeling burned a hole so deeply into her chest that it only felt appropriate. Nancy Wheeler hated Robin Buckley. 

She hated her cockiness, the way she moved around the world as if it was hers and hers alone. 

She hated her attitude, always challenging everything Nancy said. Nancy could say the sky was blue and Robin would somehow disagree with that. 

She hated how Robin, when she wasn’t challenging her, relentlessly flirted with her, and how the words dug deep under Nancy’s skin, making her feel dirty. 

And she hated that Robin was in the fraternity. 

Now, Nancy is a progressive woman. Unlike her dad, Nancy didn’t care about gender roles and often regarded it as ‘bullshit’, but a girl being in a fraternity? It unnerved Nancy to no degree. 

In her first chapter meeting that year, Nancy questioned the acceptance of Robin in Sigma Chi. Jennifer, the president at the time, explained the situation. 

“Nancy, right?” Nancy nodded as Jennifer started again. “Great question. During rush last year Robin had pledged in the fraternity under a nickname, Rob, which led to the guys letting her come to the house. They ended up really liking her, and vice versa, and asked the Panhellenic council if they could make this exception.” Jennifer took a breath and looked around the room, “Boston is a pretty progressive place, and we felt as if it was okay. She seems to be doing alright, no?” At that, Nancy nodded her head.

So a week later, at her first Sigma Chi party, about five minutes after she decided she hates frat guys and five minutes before she decided she hates Robin Buckley, Nancy wanted to talk to the girl.

It did not go the way Nancy wanted it to. 

Nancy found her in the kitchen, propped up against the white tiled counter, nursing a beer.

Nancy took note of her outfit; the taller girl was wearing plain jeans with a white t-shirt tucked in. The sleeves were rolled up to show off her biceps, which were peppered with freckles. As was her face, freckles dotted her cheeks and the top of her nose, and her lips were bright red. Nancy wondered if she wore lipstick. 

Robin must’ve caught onto her staring, because suddenly her blue eyes were locked on Nancy’s. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” the taller girl quipped, winking at Nancy as she took another sip from the red solo cup. 

Strike one: she was cocky. Nancy hated cocky. 

Nancy pushed herself off her heels until she was right in front of Robin. If Robin wanted to be this way, then so be it, but Nancy was going to be kind, goddammit. 

Nancy plastered a smile on her face, stuck her right hand out, and chirped a fake “Hi, I’m Nancy Wheeler, you’re Robin, right?” The other girl gulped down the residual beer in her mouth and took Nancy’s hand with much force, pulling her in one swoop until their noses were near bumping. Nancy let out a little ‘umph’. 

Nancy could practically taste the beer and cigarette smoke on her mouth, and her eyes flitted down to Robin’s lips. Huh. Not lipstick. She’s just like that. 

Strike number two: Nancy hates cigarettes. 

The taller girl spoke again, darkened eyes locking onto Nancy’s, “So, you’ve heard about me?” She looks Nancy up and down once, sending fire down Nancy’s whole body. “I like it when pretty girls know my name.” Robin said in her gravely voice, there was a smirk plastered on her face as she surveyed Nancy yet again. Nancy felt like she was under a microscope, being studied and prodded at. She hated it. The fire burning slowly made its way into her chest, festering underneath her skin. 

Nancy took her free hand, her right one still in a death grip, and shoved herself back from Robin. “Well, your reputation precedes you.” Nancy narrowed her eyes, trying to see if she knocked down the other girl’s seemingly faux confidence. 

She did not. 

Robin’s smirk grew into a crooked smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “Oh yeah? Like what you see, Wheeler?” She held her hands out as if to show herself off. Nancy could see why so many girls practically threw themselves at Robin. She could see the appeal: her confidence, whether fake or not, was alluring. And it’s not like she was lacking in the looks department, she wasn’t lacking at all. She had these big blue eyes that pierced your soul, her red lips matched her cheeks, which were adorned by sky-high cheekbones dotted in freckles. So yeah, Nancy saw the appeal.

It doesn’t mean she liked it, though. 

Nancy didn’t have time to stop the words from escaping her lips, “what I see is someone pretending to be somebody they’re not, and that’s not something to like.” And she swore for a moment, for one delicious moment, that Robin’s tough exterior broke down. She saw the downward twitch of her eyebrow, the slight drop of her lips, and her body tensing. 

It didn’t last long. 

Robin pushed herself off the counter, sauntering toward Nancy a few feet away. “You wanna know what I see, princess?” Robin cocks her head and raises her eyebrow, “I see a judgemental, prudish, girl who joined a sorority because she probably couldn’t make friends without one.” Robin’s face is stoic, not one emotion slipping through. 

Strike three: Robin could somehow see into Nancy’s soul. Nancy hated that. 

Nancy pushed the tears down at the girl’s words, muttered out a ‘fuck you’, turned on her heels, and walked out the door. All she heard in response was a ‘you wish’. 

Three strikes and she’s out. Nancy Wheeler decidedly hates Robin Buckley. 

Though this happened nearly two years ago now, and Nancy wasn’t one to hold grudges, she’s not letting go of this hatred anytime soon. In the last two years, Robin Buckley has made her life in the sorority a living hell. She was always there, at every event, every party, hell even sometimes at meetings. 

It seemed like Nancy had a shadow in Robin, where Nancy went, there Robin was too. Robin and her fake confidence. Robin and her raspy voice that dolled out compliments one moment and lashed out annoyances the next. Robin and the incessant need to make Nancy want to rip her hair out. 

Every interaction the two girls had seemed to go one way:

1. Robin approaches Nancy, oftentimes wearing the mask of someone with much more confidence. 
2. Nancy ignores Robin, though it’s hard to ignore a bird when it's chirping in your ear. 
3. Robin quips an insult at her, usually regarding how up-tight she is (she’s not wrong but Nancy would never admit that). 
4. Nancy snaps back, fighting for any chance that Robin Buckley will one day leave her alone. 
5. Robin scoffs, winks, scowls, smiles, or, there was that one time Robin blew her a kiss. And then she always walks away.

They repeat that cycle day by day, week after week. It was getting exhausting. Not only did Nancy have to worry about seeing Robin, she also had to worry about hearing about Robin. The campus rumor mill has new gossip day after day, but the same story seems to stick.

Robin Buckley is a player.

Which, yeah, it makes sense to Nancy that Robin can’t seem to lock anyone down. Or maybe it’s that she just uses girls and throws them out like day old milk. 

Why any self respecting woman would let herself be played by Robin Buckley is beyond her. Nancy swore to herself before coming to college that she would never, ever, ever let herself be played by a hot girl. 

Did Nancy just call Robin hot? The thought irks her so much she physically shakes her head to get rid of it. 

As Nancy gets ready for bed, she can’t help but think how absolutely crazy it is that tomorrow is her last first day of school. And as she turns out her light, she can’t help the smile plastered onto her face thinking about walking across that stage. 

That smile stays on her face as she gets ready for class, walks down the busy streets, and as she turns the door handle to her International Politics course. 

That same smile is quickly wiped away when she sees none other than Robin Buckley, sitting in the lecture hall. 

Fuck.

Chapter Text

Growing up with two younger siblings, Nancy learned how to tune out all distractions. Whether they were from Mike’s D&D campaigns that lasted well into the night, or Holly shoving a Barbie doll in her face while she’s trying to do homework, Nancy got good at building up walls to keep out unwanted disturbances. 

So why was it so hard for her to do that with Robin Buckley?

On the first day of class, when Nancy saw Robin’s dirty blonde hair and patched up jean jacket sitting in room 203, Nancy decided that she wasn’t going to let her ruin the semester. 

She could ruin her sorority events, her nights out drinking, her peaceful moments where she thought, for a moment, that Robin wasn’t going to be anywhere near her. But she couldn’t ruin this. And Nancy was going to do everything in her power to ensure that would happen.

So naturally, Nancy sat on the complete opposite side of the room from Robin. 

She didn’t look up when Robin quipped some joke at the professor’s expense to the boy seated on her right. 

She kept her head up as she walked in, as high and mighty as she could, so Robin wouldn’t have any fuel for the fire. She wasn’t going to let Robin see her falter, even for a moment. 

And it worked. 

It worked for a blissful two weeks. The most glorious, beautiful two weeks Nancy could have had. 

Two weeks of only seeing Robin at greek events, two weeks of feeling Robin’s gaze on her during class, two weeks of the same dance they’d been performing for the last two years. It was fine. Normal. Nancy could handle it. 

As Nancy sat down in her unassigned-assigned spot, she actually thought she could get through the next eight months without ripping Robin’s head off with her bare hands. 

She twiddled her pencil in between her thumb and pointer finger, waiting eagerly for class to start, as she felt a warm breath hit the back of her neck. It sent shivers down her spine, in a way that a cat might when faced with a particularly scary dog. 

A familiar raspy voice fills Nancy’s ears, “miss me?” Nancy could practically hear the smirk on her face as she made her way to face Nancy. 

Robin Buckley was standing in front of Nancy, her half-open backpack slinged from one shoulder as she plopped down in the open seat on Nancy’s left. The smell of pine and lavender coursed through Nancy’s nose at the motion. Nancy never realized that’s what she smelled like. It pisses her off. 

Screw Heather Halloway for being late to class and allowing Robin to take her spot. 

“You wish I missed you.” Nancy mumbled with half the anger she felt, not wanting to give the girl any reason to comment. Nancy stares intensely on her own notebook in front of her, not giving her any more attention. 

She does anyway. 

“I actually think it’s the other way around, princess,” Robin quipped as she got her notebook from her bag, “I hear you’re kind of obsessed with me, huh Wheeler?” And there she goes with that cockiness that Nancy hates so much. 

Nancy isn’t obsessed with Robin Buckley. Actually, what Nancy is in regard to Robin Buckley is completely and utterly done. 

But, she’s also trying to get an amendment passed that forbids any girl from joining a fraternity at Emerson. So excuse her for having Robin’s name in her mouth for the sake of Greek life as a whole. Jeez. 

“Why are you here, Robin?” Nancy finally looked at the girl next to her. Robin’s face showed nothing but amusement at Nancy’s question. Nancy wanted to wipe that cheshire grin from her face. 

Robin cleared her throat, getting impossibly closer to Nancy’s ear as she whispered, “if you, uh, didn’t know, Wheeler,” Robin points her finger down to her backpack on the floor, “this is class. We’re kind of supposed to be here, princess” And she leaned back, all smug-like in her chair. 

“Stop calling me princess.” Nancy demanded, crossing her sweatered arms over her chest. Nancy dares a glance at Robin again, “and you know what I mean Buckley, why aren’t you over there with idiot one and idiot two?” Nancy gestures toward Steve Harrington and Eddie Munson, Robin’s seemingly closest friends. 

Though she’s not sure why anyone would want that title. 

Robin followed Nancy’s gesture toward the boys before she turned back again with a look on her face that Nancy could only describe as trouble. “Didn’t you hear? We were assigned as partners for the capstone.” Robin musters the most innocent voice she could, “gee, I thought you were such a teacher’s pet that she would have told you by now, guess not.” Robin shrugs, a playful grin decorating her face as she stares at Nancy right in her eyes. 

Nancy whips her head back around, “are you fucking kidding me?” falls from her lips before she has the chance to stop it. 

Nancy couldn't believe what she was hearing. They were going to be partners. For the semester-long capstone that requires 100% of their academic energy and 0% of their rivalry that has fueled them the past two years. Nancy cannot have this happen. Her graduation is reliant on a good grade in this course and she can’t do that when Robin Buckley is back in her orbit. Nancy knows what she needs to do. 

Before Robin can speak and make Nancy’s sudden headache grow any worse, Nancy gets up from her spot with an exasperated huff. She doesn't make it halfway out of the aisle when she feels warmth on her wrist. 

“I already tried to get her to change our partners. It’s a lost cause.” Robin finishes with a scowl as Nancy sits back down and shakes her freckled hand from her wrist. Is this girl just covered in freckles from head to toe? 

Nancy feels defeated. She needs a plan. Nancy Wheeler can only function properly if there’s a proper plan in place. 

As Nancy is about to protest yet again, Robin pulls a sheet of paper from her bag. “This is the list of acceptable project ideas, I snagged it from Dr. Byer’s bag before class.” Robin places the paper slightly in front of Nancy’s eyeline. “What should we do?”

Nancy presses on her temples and mumbles out an exasperated “fuck” as Robin peers over the paper.

Without missing a beat, Robin smirks as she runs her finger down the list of projects and says, “I don’t think that’s an appropriate project, but I bet we can make something work.” She sends Nancy a mind-numbingly annoying wink. 

Nancy rolls her eyes so hard they could have fallen to the back of her head. 

This semester was going to be hell. 

Dr. Byers collects the class's attention with a few words, but Nancy misses it completely. She can feel Robin’s heady gaze on her. It makes her skin crawl and the fire in her chest roars wildly. 

During the entire fifty minute lecture, Nancy tries to hang on to every single word out of her professor's mouth regarding the project, but every time she’s back in focus, Robin does something that breaks her out of her concentration.

She bounces her right leg a lot, and sometimes it grazes Nancy’s left leg ever so slightly, making Nancy grow more irritable by the second. 

Robin tapped her fingers incessantly on her thigh, a rhythm that Nancy could never figure out. Not that she wanted to. 

God, does this girl ever sit still? 

And just because Robin isn’t sitting by Steve anymore doesn’t mean her comments have faltered, they’re just now directed toward Nancy. A slew of words disgrace Nancy’s left ear, ‘focusing hard, Wheeler? Sure hope I’m not distracting you.’ and ‘what’s a girl like you doing in this class anyway? Was How to be a Priss 101 full? Or, I guess you’d be teaching that one, huh?’. And Nancy met every comment with silence. She wasn’t going to give her any of her attention. Anymore, that is. 

Until Dr. Byers signals the end of class, and Robin snarks out “c’mon baby, give me something to work with here.”, which Nancy snaps. 

“Can you just shut the fuck up for one moment of your life?” Her voice is laced with poison, and came out way louder than she wanted. Robin’s cheeks flush as a couple classmates look their way, but if she was embarrassed, she hides it incredibly well. 

“Keep going, I like it when you get angry.” Robin rasps out as she slides out of her seat over to Steve and Eddie. 

This girl was impossible, and Nancy’s chances of graduating top of her class were getting slimmer and slimmer with the notion that 100% of her grade depended on the girls getting along enough to actually put something together. 

Nancy wanted to cry. She wanted to rip her hair out. She wanted to run Robin Buckley and her stupid bike over with her car. She briefly considered it. 

—

It isn’t until much later, after she has sat in her anger and screamed into her fluffy pillows, that El waltzes into their shared room at the sorority house. Upon seeing Nancy in her state, which she guesses doesn’t look so great, El plops down on the end of Nancy’s pink bed. 

“Are you okay? You kind of look like you were run over by a bus.” El’s voice is playful, and Nancy can’t help but groan at her words. 

“I didn’t get run over by a bus today, but I wish Robin Buckley would.” She mumbles into the pillow sitting on her lap, the anger making its presence known. 

“Woah, you used to only wish she got hit by a car, now a BUS?” El smiles, "that's intense Nancy, probably warranted. Do you wanna talk about what happened?” El grabs Nancy’s pillow from her lap, freeing her arms as El grabs her hands. 

Nancy loves her. She loves her so much. 

“It’s just,” Nancy squeezes El’s hands so hard she’s probably hurting her, “we were assigned to be partners for this stupid fucking class, and she’s such an asshole that I could just scream.” All at once, Nancy releases her death grip and hops off her bed, pacing their floor, “I just- she’s just so- there’s not even words that could- I hate her, El. It's all just bullshit. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this.” Nancy wrings her hands together as she looks at El with pleading eyes. 

Please tell me how I can survive this. 

Please just shoot me dead now. 

El pauses, considering her words, “I know you hate her, I just-” El’s eyes dart around the room, avoiding Nancy’s gaze. “Is she really that bad, you know? It’s not like she killed your childhood dog or something, she just gets under your skin.” El finally looks back at Nancy and shrugs as Nancy starts pacing again. 

“No El, she is that bad. You’re lucky you don’t have her in your face all of the time, because having to stare at her stupid blue eyes and listen to her stupid raspy voice while she ambushes me with flirtations is that bad.” Nancy takes a breath, “It’s that bad to me, and there’s no world in which I’m fine with Robin Buckley. She makes me want to scream.” Nancy breathes out for what feels like the first time in forever. Her heart is racing and her palms are sweaty against each other and El just doesn’t get it. 

El just doesn’t understand what Robin Buckley does to her and the fire in her chest. 

El just doesn’t understand the feeling of being seen by Robin Buckley. 

And Nancy doesn’t understand why she cares so much what Robin Buckley thinks about her. 

El has a determined look on her face as she says, “well then, let’s do it.” And she hops off Nancy’s bed to face the girl. 

Nancy narrows her eyes, “do what? Kill her?” Nancy is only half-joking. 

Kind of. 

El starts again, “no Nancy, I don’t think we should kill her. I think we should scream.” And she says it so matter-of-factly that Nancy knows she’s serious. 

“Like, right here, right now?” Nancy gestures around their room, knowing that twenty other girls are peacefully in their rooms right now. 

El rolls her eyes and takes Nancy’s hand into hers, dragging her toward their bedroom door. “Not right here, but definitely right now,” El shuts their door with a click, guiding Nancy down the hall, “Max’s apartment has a roof, remember?” 

And Nancy does. She remembers the many nights they spent up there studying, gossiping, crying, everything a junior in college could possibly do. 

So Nancy lets El drag her the five minute walk to Max’s place, and as El’s knuckles rap on Max’s door does Nancy think the idea is a little insane. 

Max, dressed in sweats, opens the door with a concerned look on her face, “everything okay?”.

“No. Nancy needs to scream.” El says pointedly as she grabs Max with her free hand and drags them up the stairs. They’re all silent as they step out onto the roof, though Max sends Nancy looks of confusion. Nancy just shrugs. 

The brisk air of late September nearly brings Nancy back into herself. Someone has set up fairy lights along the various poles on top of the roof. There’s no one else out here as El guides the two girls to the near edge of the roof. The city lights always take Nancy’s breath away, knowing that in every building, in every car, there’s someone living their life, completely unaware of Nancy’s existence. 

It makes her feel free, like she can do anything, say anything, and be anyone she wants to be. And looking at the two girls on her left, she realizes she’s exactly where she wants to be. 

Without warning, El startles the girls by screaming. She’s screaming into the abyss, and all Nancy can do is exchange a look with Max. 

Max is next, and it sounds like she’s competing with El in who can scream the loudest. Max is winning. 

All it takes for Nancy to start screaming is to think about Robin.

Robin and her stupid flirtations. 

Robin and her impossible face.

Robin and her ability to make Nancy think about her, especially when she doesn’t want to.

So, Nancy screams. 

She screams until her lungs are desperate for air.

And then she screams again. 

She screams until every thought of Robin subsides. 

She screams until the fire in her chest is tamed. 

And she screams so loudly, for so long, that her face feels tight and her throat is scratchy. 

With every scream, she’s saying: Goodbye Robin Buckley, I give you no more of my attention. You are expelled from my thoughts. 

And it feels good. It feels so goddamn good. 

So why does it feel like she’s lying to herself? 

Chapter Text

After another week of Robin pestering Nancy in class, Nancy screaming from Max’s rooftop three more times after every class with Robin, and stilted conversations on their topics, they officially decided on an idea for their project. ‘Decided’ was a term used loosely; what happened was Robin pestered Nancy enough until she finally gave in. 

They chose the progression of the Cold War, mainly focusing on the impact of the conflict in both the United States and the USSR. Nancy would have rather done something regarding the Latin American revolutions taking place, but Robin was insistent on choosing the Cold War. There was good source material, certainly the library had enough information to aid in their thirty page paper. She wasn’t too worried about it. 

But she was curious as to why Robin pushed so hard for it. 

The early October air smacked Nancy in the face as she opened the door out of the sorority house. Leaves littered the ground as she walked to the library, the crunch under her sneakers was like a soundtrack to her. She doesn’t think she could ever get sick of this place. The campus was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, large brick buildings tickled the clouds, maple trees brushed her as she walked past, being able to walk down the street and see people she knew, it was all kind of beautiful to her. 

The library was beautiful as well, Nancy thought as she approached the building, until she opened the heavy doors. The air was stale, so thick that Nancy could have choked from it. When she walked past fellow students, she could practically feel the stress radiating off of them. Someone is crying while trying to photocopy a book. 

She didn’t have to walk long before she saw chopped sandy-blonde hair as the smell of pine hit her. Just thinking about how her first out of class work session with Robin was going to go nearly made her turn on her heels and walk out.

But, she needed to tough it out. Because Robin Buckley didn’t matter to her. The only thing that matters is her grade, walking across that stage, and never seeing Robin Buckley again. 

She took a deep breath as she approached Robin, walking around to the other side of the table, making her presence known to the girl. Robin took off her headphones and paused her Walkman. 

Robin’s grin met her eyes this time at the sight of Nancy. “Hi, princess.” 

“Hi.” Nancy huffed out, sitting down across from her and pulling five books out of her bag, “I already had these, I figured they’d be useful.” She shoves them in the middle of the table, and Robin picks one up to inspect it. 

“Wow, the princess actually cares about something other than her sorority.” Robin sets the book down and crosses her arms over her chest, cheshire smile plastered to her face, “color me impressed.” 

God, she is impossible. Nancy rolled her eyes as she said, “can we just focus on the assignment please? The faster we figure out what we want to use, the faster I can get out of here.” 

Robin’s eyebrows shoot up to her hairline, “oooh, you got a hot date, huh Wheeler? Who’s the lucky guy? Maybe I should say unlucky.” Robin leans her elbows on the table, challenging Nancy in the way only she knows how. 

Nancy follows suit, “jealous?” she says as she cocks her head and raises her eyebrow. Robin swallows in response. The fire is building in Nancy’s chest again and she’s well aware she’ll have to walk to Max’s before going home. “There’s no guy- there’s no date- no, why am I even explaining myself to you? Did you do any research on your own?” 

At that, Robin silently pulls a thick binder from her backpack and slams it on the middle of the table with a ‘thud’ that makes Nancy jump. Robin gestures toward the incredibly full binder in front of her, “what’s it look like, princess?” Her words were laced with annoyance. 

Nancy didn’t know what to say, so she said nothing. What? Was she supposed to be impressed that Robin did what she was supposed to do? All she does is open the binder and take note of its contents. Some of it is notes on the subject in Robin’s chicken scratch. Some of it is photocopies of newspapers, personal statements, chapters of textbooks, and photographs. Nancy spots a single loose sheet of paper, and as she pulls it out she realizes that it’s a translation guide. It’s important words to know in Russian translated to English. 

Robin seems to notice what Nancy is studying because she clears her throat loudly. She avoids Nancy’s eyes as she says, “uhm, that’s just like something I made. For you. I wasn’t sure if you spoke Russian, so I wanted to make a guide.” And Nancy could be hallucinating, but was Robin Buckley nervous? She was fidgeting with her hands, avoiding Nancy’s eyes like the plague, and her blush dipped down to her throat. 

“What, and you do?” 

“Do what?”

“Speak Russian?” 

Robin cleared her throat again. “Uh, yeah. I’m nearly fluent in Russian- though it is the hardest language I’ve ever learned.” 

She knows Russian? And other languages? What the hell? Nancy could feel her cheeks flushing at the embarrassment of not knowing this. But there truly was no way she could have known. Nancy didn’t know what to say. 

That’s so fucking cool.

Why did you learn Russian?

I kind of want you to say something in Russian.

But she landed on a casual, “you know other languages?” 

And Robin giggled slightly, “hah, yeah, I’m fluent in five languages. Russian, French, Italian, Spanish, and Latin.” Robin runs her hands through her hair, it looks soft. “Oh, and English, I guess.” She added, as if she forgot. 

And if Nancy was semi-impressed (though she’d never admit it) at Robin knowing Russian, she was beyond impressed that Robin knew five languages. Nancy can’t even think of a single person she knew who was fluent in anything other than English. The fire roars in her chest again, but it feels less violent this time. 

Nancy nodded at her words. “So, is that why you pestered me about choosing the Cold War?” 

Robin looked sheepish again. It kind of made Nancy's heart feel sore. “Yeah, I’ve kind of been interested in it since I was a kid,” Robin chuckles dryly, “my dad was really into it before he passed, so he’s the one who kind of got me interested in it.” 

Nancy’s cheeks flushed in embarrassment again. “Oh, I-I’m sorry about that,” and at Robin’s confused expression, Nancy added more, “about your dad, I meant.”

Robin’s eyes lost their spark for a split second, but then it was back again. “Ah, yeah. It’s okay, it happened a long time ago. Should we start working?” Nancy watched as Robin grabbed the binder to sort the papers they would need. 

But that was all she could do. All she could do was watch Robin because she felt like she finally got something of substance out of her. It took her a moment plus a confused look from Robin to snap out of her staring and start working. 

Nancy felt like she had whiplash. She knew that Robin had a soul, but for her to bare a sliver of that soul to Nancy was almost too much. Fighting and Robin’s flirting and their pointed stares were enough to fill up Nancy’s mind, but now she had this to think about, too. 

It wasn’t a bad feeling, getting to know Robin. She figured it would come eventually with them being partners, but it was overwhelming. 

—

After spending a couple of hours in near silence, broken up with questions of ‘do you think this is a good source?’ and ‘can we photocopy this page?’, the girls were nearly done preparing as the sun was setting on the horizon. 

Nancy was reading a newspaper article from the early 80s of Reagan’s thoughts on détente as she heard murmuring across the table. She pried her eyes away from the article toward the taller girl. Nancy recognized she was speaking in a different language, definitely Russian, as she was reading a newspaper as well. 

Nancy didn’t know what she was saying, but she knew the curve of Robin’s lips molded around the Russian syllables. She was near whispering, but Nancy could hear her raspy voice as it accompanied the soft pronunciation of the words on paper. 

She didn’t know what she was saying, but she kind of didn’t want Robin to stop. The fire in her chest roared loudly again, and this one was complimented by a swarming feeling in her gut. 

All too suddenly, Robin dropped the words falling from her lips, and looked at Nancy. Nancy jumped slightly, for the second time that day, and it wasn’t from a sudden thud. It was from a realization.

Her eyes are kind of pretty.

But, she decided to tell herself it was because she got caught staring. Nancy looked at Robin under her eyelashes, suddenly feeling embarrassed for a third time today. This girl makes Nancy feel so weird. 

“Sorry, I’ve just never heard you speak Russian before.” Nancy says as she chews on her thumbnail, a nasty habit she developed as a child. 

Robin smirks, and oh God, here she goes again, Nancy thought. “You like what you hear, Wheeler?” And then her smirk is broken, transforming into a smile that makes her blue eyes shine. 

Nancy laughs, a laugh too loud for the library, which warrants the librarian to send them a ‘shh’ from her desk. 

Nancy realizes she’s never laughed at Robin’s jokes before. It makes her feel weird.

“You wish, it’s just interesting, okay?” is all Nancy can muster out. 

“Oh yeah?” Robin’s voice is low, and it sends a shock into Nancy’s belly. “I can say more, really knock your socks off, princess.” 

Nancy gestures to signal go ahead, and Robin does as told. 

“Creo que eres hermosa,” Robin gulps, “Spanish, if you couldn’t tell.” 

Nancy doesn’t know what she’s saying, she just knows she wants more.

“I could tell, you can continue.” 

Robin clears her throat, “je sais que tu me détestes, j'aurais préféré que non.” 

Before Robin can tell her which language that was from, Nancy perks up, “French, right?!” and suddenly Robin looks scared. 

“Uh yeah, do you speak it?” Her eyes are avoiding Nancy’s. Nancy doesn’t know why. She also doesn't know why it's bothering her so much. 

“Oh, God no. Not even a little bit. My ex really liked old French movies, the only thing she talked about, really.” Nancy laughed. 

And for a moment, the taller girl looks relieved. The expression is broken when Robin’s eyes shoot up to look into Nancy’s, eyebrows meeting her hairline, and her mouth open in shock. “She, huh? Didn’t think we played for the same team.” And now Nancy understands her shock. 

“Oh. Yeah. Guess that never really came up, huh?” Nancy laughs to herself as she tucks her hair behind her ear. 

“Guess not,” and Robin’s impossible all-teeth smile is back on her face, “hai il mio cuore.” Robin gulps, “Italian.”

“Ah, makes sense. That's 3 out of four languages I haven’t heard you speak, Buckley.” 

“Te osculari volui ex quo momento te vidi. Latin. That’s it on the languages, Wheeler.” Nancy watches as Robin stuffs her binder into her backpack, “so, same time tomorrow?” and at Nancy’s nod, Robin walks out away from the table, and out the door. Leaving Nancy sat transfixed as she watches her leave. 

Never in the two years that Nancy has known Robin, did she ever leave an interaction feeling like this. Nancy isn’t sure exactly what she’s feeling. Hope? Intrigue? Camaraderie? Confusion? Attract- Nope, Nancy shakes the last one out of her head as she puts her books in her bag. 

She’s going to land on confusion. 

Confusion because she realizes she doesn’t know much, if anything, about the girl she’s hated the past two years. 

Confusion because she realizes she wants to know more, she almost aches for it. 

How can you hate someone you don’t truly know? Nancy questioned, but she concedes that it was done. If she could hate (was it even really hate afterall?) Robin for two years without much to go off of, what was she going to feel about her now? Nancy didn’t think her hatred could go deeper (she’s almost certain it won’t, but she won’t admit it just yet). 

When the October air hits her yet again, she feels renewed.

Sort of. 

She spends the walk thinking about the library, Robin, the assignment, Robin’s lips wrapping themselves around each word, the stale air, Robin’s surprised face when she found out about Nancy being gay, the librarian shushing her, Robin, Robin, Robin. 

But Nancy was used to it, she reasoned with herself as she climbed up the stairs to her bedroom. Robin had consumed a large portion of her brain for the better part of two years, what’s a little more thinking going to do? (A lot). 

It was when she was tucked into bed, the street lights making their presence known through Nancy’s window, that she realized something. 

She didn’t go to Max’s apartment to scream.

She didn’t even want to. 

And Nancy didn’t know what to do with that. Maybe it was progress? Maybe it’ll be back to how it was tomorrow? Maybe it was that Nancy enjoyed being around Robin…No, that couldn't be it. 

So, she settled on progress. Progress that would lead to getting an A on the assignment. Progress that would lead to graduation in seven months. Progress that would lead to never seeing Robin Buckley again. 

Why wasn’t she happy about that?

Chapter Text

The whiskey spiked hot apple cider was burning a hole through Nancy’s thinly knit mittens, a Christmas gift from her mother when she was fourteen. The back half of the second week of October brought fifty degree weather, which wouldn’t be so bad, but Nancy’s hands were perpetually ten degrees cooler than her normal body temperature. Nancy surveyed the sizable crowd watching the Emerson Lions lose to the Eastern Michigan Eagles. 

Nancy had attended every homecoming game during her time at Emerson, and though she’s got a mountain of a paper and a confusing classmate taking up every one of her thoughts, she wanted to have a good time at her last homecoming. El and Max were sitting next to her, Max having to explain the rules of football to El, despite them seeing every homecoming game for the last three years together. 

“So, why do they keep switching the direction of the ball?” 

“They have four chances to run the ball ten yards, but if they can’t reach ten yards in those four chances, then the ball is turned over to the other team.” Max’s eyes are focused straight ahead, narrating the play as it’s happening. One of the Eagles tackles a player on the Lions, and the crowd becomes a chorus of ‘yikes’ and ‘ouch’. 

“So they can just tackle each other?" and Nancy almost laughs at the genuine tone El has. 

“Yes, El, that’s kind of the only way to stop a play from happening. That, or an interception.” 

“Okay, but…”

Their voices become fuzzy as Nancy tunes out her surroundings. She’s been trying to figure out how to include critiques of Reagan’s handling the Cold War without sounding biased in their paper. She figures Dr. Byers is a woman of honesty, so maybe she would appreciate the critiques, but Nancy also knows that a lot of faculty supported Reagan during his time in office, so she doesn’t want to earn herself a bad grade by bad mouthing the former president. Though, she’s not sure she cares enough anymore. 

Robin and Nancy have worked in the library nearly every day for the past two weeks trying to come up with a proper outline and the appropriate resources for their topic. Robin has been great at finding primary sources from Russia and Nancy has been trying to apply them to her sources from the United States. It was something that kept her up at night, what to do about their project, how to get an A on it, and the actual process of writing a thirty page paper. 

It wasn’t the only thing that kept her up at night, though. 

Robin was just…she was just so…

Not who Nancy thought she was. 

Granted, they still bickered. If they could get their grade based on how well they bickered with each other, they’d receive that A in no time. 

—

“I just think that if we’re going to talk about the United States and Russia, then we should probably talk about Cuba, too.” Nancy whisper screamed as Robin rolled her eyes across from her. 

“I get that, princess, but we can’t dedicate half the fucking paper to Cuba when our focus is on America and the USSR. We can have a hefty section for it, but we can’t do fifteen pages on the fucking missile crisis.” Robin snarked back. 

“Why the fuck are we doing everything you want to do, anyway? Aren’t we supposed to be partners? I thought the point of partners was to work together, not have one of us call the shots.” 

“Oh, if one of us was calling the shots, it would be you. Wheeler, I’m trying to compromise with you here. Tone down the prissy act and get back to reading.” Robin grumbled, looking towards the stack of books on Nancy's right.

“I wish Byers let us do this alone.” Nancy mumbled. 

Robin looked at her, face unreadable. She sighed, and said, “yeah, same.”

—

There were also moments that were nice. Unexpectedly nice. That made Nancy question everything she thought the past three years. 

Moments she would have never had with Robin if it weren’t for Dr. Byers and this assignment. Moments they would have never had if they didn’t spend countless hours together under the guise of work. Moments that Nancy wanted to stuff into a locked box in her brain to relive later. 

—

Robin waltzed up to Nancy at the library, holding two hot coffees in her hands. “Good morning princess, one for you, one for me.”

Nancy watched as she set down the coffee in front of her, Robin’s usual scent of pine now masqueraded by the smell of burnt coffee. “Is that-” Nancy starts, but is swiftly cut off.

“Black coffee with two sugars and cream. That’s what you like, right?” Robin looks worried, as if she forgot Nancy's order that she never even told her. 

“Uh, yeah. That’s what I like…how did you…?” Nancy inspects the cup as she takes a sip. It’s exactly what she needed, and Robin somehow knew that.

Robin’s face blushes slightly, and it sends butterflies into Nancy's gut. Nope. This is just a nice gesture from someone I hate. 

Hated. Currently dislike? Like? She shakes the thought away. 

“I- uh- heard your coffee order once like a billion years ago,” Robin notices the smile on Nancy's face, “don’t be flattered princess, it’s the easiest order to remember.” Robin says false defensively as she sits down. 

“Well, thank you. It’s really nice.” and at the sudden realization that’s the closest she’s gotten to complimenting Robin to her face, Nancy deflects. “You’re not as vile as I thought you were.” A playful smile tugging at her lips as she sips the warm liquid. 

Robin laughs, “you’re just about as vile as I thought you were, Wheeler.” 

“You sure?” Nancy bats her eyelashes, looking up at Robin while taking another sip. Robin chokes on her drink. 

“Shut it Wheeler, drink your coffee and get to work.” Robin laughs, her cheeks growing a shade of red Nancy’s never seen before. 

During work that day, Nancy couldn't stop smiling. 

It seems like Robin couldn’t, either. 

—

There are moments where Nancy learns just a little bit more of the girl she’s spending so much time with. Robin gives her sand sized crumbs of information that Nancy holds onto like her life depended on it, worried that if she moves too much the sand will fall from her grip, lost forever. Nancy has started to let Robin in too. 

It’s like they’re creating their own beach; placing one grain of sand on the shore, hoping the tide doesn’t wash them out. 

—

They’ve moved to sitting on the floor, Robin exclaiming that past 10:00 PM she needs to be ‘one with the ground’, and Nancy doesn’t protest. They’re huddled up along the back wall of the library, books and papers scattered around them. Nancy notices a girl, a very pretty one at that, wink and wave at Robin as she walks past. The fire that had been long replaced with a tame one is back again, and it is violently roaring in her chest at the action. 

Robin sends a tight-lipped smile back, but grimaces as Nancy catches her eye. Nancy whispers, leaning in toward Robin, “is that one of your conquests?” Nancy’s not sure why she asks. She kind of doesn’t want to know the answer. 

She’ll call it journalistic intrigue. 

Robin rolls her eyes, “no, God no…that shits just-” Robin cuts herself off, bouncing between Nancy’s eyes as she thinks. “Okay, I’m going to tell you something, and you can’t laugh, or go running off to your friends about it, okay?” 

Judging by the look in Robin’s eyes, she’s being serious. Nancy straightens up, and does a zipper and lock motion to her lips. Robin smiles at that. The fire in Nancy's chest dies down, leaving crackling embers in its place. 

Robin gets closer, if that was even possible, and Nancy can feel the ghost of her lips on her ear. “I’m not the player everyone thinks I am,” Robin swallows loudly, “I’ve actually only been with one person.” 

Nancy moves her head to stare Robin in the eyes, looking for a trace of amusement. Robin is dead serious. “Why do you let them say that stuff about you, then?” Nancy realizes how close their faces are. She doesn’t move away.

“It’s better than the shit anyone said about me in high school,” Robin’s face grows solemn as she shrugs, “I take what I can get.” 

Nancy shakes her head, “that’s not fair to you.” 

“Yeah, well. Maybe I deserve it.” Robin’s eyes search Nancy’s face, “let's just keep working. Do you have anything on Poland’s independence?” 

—

Nancy and Robin were sitting on the cool grass outside of the library, the sun beaming down on them was the only warmth protecting them from the mid-October weather. Robin looked up at Nancy suddenly, and Nancy tore her eyes away from her book that she was sort of reading. 

“Did you know Reagan was divorced once?”

Nancy laughed, “what does that have to do with the Cold War?” 

Robin returned her laugh, “nothing! Just something interesting about our former president. Apparently he’s not close with his kids. Yeesh.” Robin says as she goes back to reading a newspaper article the librarian let them take outside after much pleading from Robin. 

Nancy all but mumbles, “I can drink to that.” and when she looks up at Robin, her face is a mixture of confused and sympathetic. Nancy kind of wants to smooth out the crinkles on her forehead with her thumb. She doesn’t. 

With a sigh, Nancy explains. “My dad just doesn’t try to be in our lives.”

“Our?”

“I have two siblings, Mike is eighteen and Holly is eleven. I think he’s trying now with Holly, probably ‘cause she hasn’t done anything to disappoint him just yet.” Nancy tries to laugh it off, but Robin’s not laughing with her. Just staring at her. It makes Nancy want to squirm. 

“I don’t think you could disappoint anyone if you tried, Wheeler.” and Robin’s voice is so impossibly soft, and her face is so sure of this, that Nancy sort of believes her. 

“Thanks. I guess it would be better if he just…tried more. Or, I guess the best option would be for my mom to divorce him, but that won’t happen.” 

Robin nods, “I’m sorry.” 

And suddenly, Nancy remembers. Her heart drops into her stomach as she remembers that Robin’s dad is dead and now she’s complaining about her dad, who is very much alive. She feels so selfish, complaining about something that Robin can’t have, even if her dad is emotionally distant, it’s better than nothing. She feels so stupid.

Nancy meets Robin’s eyes, “Robin, I’m-”and before thinking it through, Nancy puts her hand on top of Robin’s. It’s warm, it fans the flames behind her heart, and Nancy kind of doesn’t want to let go. It’s nice. “I’m so sorry. Here I am, complaining about my dad and you- I- I’m just sorry.”

At that, Robin flips her hand over and grabs Nancy's, squeezing their hands together. It reminds Nancy of the first time they met, Robin’s death grip on her hand as she pulled her in. It doesn't feel like that, though. It’s softer. Nicer. The weight over Nancy’s hand feels like an anchor, grounding her before she can be washed away.

“Nancy,” Robin trips up over her name for a moment, and Nancy realizes it’s because it’s the first time she’s ever called her something other than ‘Wheeler’ and ‘princess’. It feels good. “You can talk about your dad with me.” Nancy meets Robin’s eyes as she squeezes their hands, “just ‘cause some shit happened to me doesn’t mean you can’t talk about the shit you go through, too. Okay?” 

Nancy nods, squeezes Robin’s hand back, “okay.”

“Okay.” Robin's face lights up with a smile, and Nancy can’t help but do the same.

She also can’t help feeling slightly disappointed when Robin lets go of her hand to pick up her book again. The feeling of Robin’s hand lingers on Nancy’s skin for too long after. 

—

The smell of pine overtakes Nancy’s senses and sends her back to reality. Max and El stop talking once a familiar voice starts. 

“Hi, princess.” Robin stands before her, wearing a letterman jacket and jeans. 

“Hi, Robin.” Nancy smiles as she gestures toward Max, “Robin, you know El already, this is Max. Max, this is Robin.” 

Robin shoots Max a little wave as Max starts, “so this is the infamous Robin Buckley that Nancy can’t stop talking about.” 

Nancy sputters as she shoots Max a death glare, cheeks heating up in embarrassment. Robin gives her a look, a look that Nancy knows all too well. Goddammit. 

“You talkin’ about me, Wheeler?” The smirk is planted on her face and Nancy wants to smack it off. Sort of. 

“Only bad things, Buckley.” Nancy shoots Robin a playful grin as Robin sits down next to her. Nancy gives her an incredulous look, “what’s up?”

“Well, I’m not here to watch football with you guys, though it seems to be riveting. I came over to see if you wanted to come to a party tonight.” Robin stares into Nancy’s eyes for a beat too long before she looks towards the other girls, “and you guys too, of course.” 

Nancy looks back at Max and El. They had plans to watch a movie tonight, but for some godforsaken reason Nancy is drawn to this party. She needed a break, afterall. Nancy shrugs, getting a thumbs up from El and a head nod from Max. 

“Sure, we’ll be there.” 

Robin kind of lights up. Nancy kind of likes it. 

“Kay,” Robin starts to get up to walk away, looking over her shoulder to shout “wear somethin’ pretty for me, Wheeler.” and then she’s gone. Nancy rolls her eyes, but there’s no merit behind it. 

Why is her face so warm all of a sudden?

Max slaps her hands on her knees. “If we’re partying tonight I’m going to need a nap.” 

The three girls all decide to nap and reconvene after dinner to get ready together. El and Nancy walk Max back to her apartment knowing they’ll have to call twenty times to make sure she’s up. 

Their walk back to the sorority house is doused in comfortable silence. El breaks it as they walk into the house, “Robin doesn’t seem too bad, Nance.” 

And Nancy can’t seem to disagree with her. 

—

The walk to the frat house is much colder than her walk back to the sorority house. The sun set ages ago and Nancy did not dress for forty degree weather. The two shots of vodka she took as a liquid jacket did a semi-good job at keeping her warm, but she’s shaking as she walks down the dimly lit streets. She’s only wearing a thin black long sleeve and high waisted blue jeans, she knows how sweaty frat houses can get, and wearing a heavy weight sweater wouldn’t do. 

She also kind of wanted to look good. For who? She won’t think about that. 

When they open the old wooden door to the house, the stench of beer and body odor is repugnant to her nose. Before she can make it five steps into the daunting crowd of sorority girls and frat guys alike, Robin Buckley appears out of thin air in front of her. 

And my God. She looks good. 

She’s wearing a form fitting Blondie t-shirt, a leather jacket draped on her shoulders. Nancy has to focus on her breathing as she takes in the girl in front of her. Robin is balancing three red solo cups filled with a mystery concoction. She hands them out to each of the girls. 

Nancy can’t stop staring.

“Nancy, Max, El…welcome to my humble abode.” Robin smirks at the girls, gesturing toward the crowd. 

“Real humble, Buckley.” Max deadpans as she stares at the three story house panning out in front of her eyes. El snickers, Robin grins wider, and Nancy can’t stop staring. 

She downs the cup in five seconds flat. Robin’s eyes blow wide as she watches Nancy. “Jesus, Wheeler. Take it slow.” 

Nancy playfully shoves the empty cup into Robin’s chest, “‘nother one?” she slurs out. 

“Your wish is my command, princess.” Nancy watches her saunter off to the kitchen. When she turns around, she's met with confused looks. 

“Are you…okay?” El asks.

“I can’t clean your throw up again, Nancy.” Max whines. 

“I want to dance!” Nancy shouts as she grabs both of the girls by their hands into the middle of the living room. There’s bodies pressing up against hers, sweat pooling at the nape of her neck, but she doesn’t care. 

At every song that plays, Nancy exclaims “oh! I love this one!” as she dances wildly to the music with her best friends. Max and El scream over the music that they’re going to go find a bathroom, and Nancy is left dancing alone with strangers. 

Suddenly, she feels a hand on her waist from behind. Her heart picks up. She kind of hopes it’s Robin. 

Huh? 

But, when Nancy turns around, there’s a sweaty frat boy she’s certainly seen before. She thinks his name starts with a J, but she’s too tipsy right now to remember. The weight of his hand on her hip makes her feel like she’s drowning, and as he looks into her eyes, she thinks she might be. 

He gets too close to her face, "you're the hottest girl here.” 

“Uh, thanks.” Nancy slurs out as she tries to get out of his ironclaw grip, putting her hand on his to pry it off of her. He just holds on tighter. Nancy can’t breathe, his hand is gripping her so hard she’s worried she’ll find bruises there in the morning. He presses his body against hers as he stares at her lips, and she’s pushing and hitting his chest so hard that he will definitely have bruises in the morning. She can barely hear herself screaming ‘stop’ over the music. 

Suddenly, his body is pried away from her so fast she starts to fall backwards, but something catches her.

No. 

Someone catches her. 

Robin’s arms wrap around Nancy's waist as she whispers “are you okay?” and “it’s okay, it’s okay, I got you.” into her ear, sending a flood of relief into Nancy’s chest. Nancy’s anchor is back. She can’t help but lean into the warmth of Robin’s front pressed against her back. She can’t help but revel in the way Robin’s fingers are gripping Nancy’s waist. 

This is what it should feel like. Not some sweaty frat guy pinning himself to her. But Robin. Robin holding her waist so softly, Robin whispering reassurances. 

She’s got me. It’s okay. Nancy reassures herself. 

But the moment of relief is washed away when she notices what’s happening right in front of her. 

Steve Harrington is pummeling Jason (she finally remembered his name) into the ground. He’s screaming “she said stop, jackass.” 

Robin seems to notice the commotion too, because all too soon her grip on Nancy’s waist is gone and she’s rushing over to Steve. Nancy misses the contact already. 

Robin is grabbing onto Steve’s shoulders, gesturing for Eddie to help her lift Steve up from the ground. Nancy thinks she can hear Robin say “can you please grab your boyfriend before he kills someone” but she can’t be too sure. She wouldn’t be surprised if they were dating, though. 

Once Steve is in Eddie’s grip and being calmed down, Nancy takes a look at Jason's face. He’s bloody, and bruises are starting to blossom under his eyes. She can’t help the small smile on her face. 

Robin rushes back to Nancy, eyes wild as she surveys Nancy’s face. One of her hands brushes Nancy’s cheek, and oh.

Nancy doesn’t know when she started crying, but now she can’t seem to stop. Robin is trying to brush the tears from her eyes, but they just keep coming. Robin snakes a hand around Nancy’s waist as she leads her away from the living room, but she doesn’t make it a few paces before Robin stops walking.

Nancy has never seen Robin look so angry as she looms over Jason still lying on the ground. “Say you’re sorry.” Robin sneers toward him.

Jason says nothing at that, only wipes the blood from his lip. 

Robin takes her booted foot, puts it right up against the zipper of his jeans, and presses slightly. Jason winces, yelping in pain as she keeps pressing harder. “Say. You’re. Fucking. Sorry. Or so help me God I am going to make sure you can’t reproduce.” 

A broken “I’m sorry” escapes his lips. Nancy wants to throw up.

Robin removes her foot, but not before she can kick him in the leg. She puts a finger in his face and says “never touch her again, got it?” 

Nancy thinks it’s the hottest thing she’s ever seen.

Jason raises his hands in surrender, and Robin is right back to Nancy’s side, guiding her to the bathroom. 

El and Max come face to face with them, they both scream ‘what the fuck?’ and ‘are you okay, Nancy?’ but Robin assures them she’ll be fine, but asks them to wait outside of the bathroom. The girls nod, apprehensive to let their best friend out of their sight again, but they let the two slip into the bathroom. 

The sudden quiet of the bathroom feels like Nancy was dunked into a tank of water. Robin sits Nancy down on the closed toilet seat and starts rummaging through the drawers. She makes an ‘aha’ sound of victory as she holds up makeup wipes. She grabs tissues before squatting before Nancy.

Robin scans Nancy’s face while she wipes off the tears and mascara running down her cheeks. Robin is being so gentle, cradling Nancy’s chin with one hand, and when she’s all done she doesn’t remove her grip. There’s a pile of tissues on the white tiled ground and the laugh reverberates in Nancy’s chest. Robin moves her hand from Nancy’s chin to her jaw, rubbing soft circles into Nancy's skin. She laughs too, and suddenly everything is funny. The look on Jason’s face when Robin was towering over him. How sweaty Steve was after the debacle. The looks on Max’s and El’s faces. 

The laughter dies down, and with a final chuckle Robin says “he’s a jackass.”

Nancy nods, the weight of everything hitting her again, “yeah”. 

Robin brings her other hand up to the other side of Nancy’s face. She looks pained. She looks so sad. “I’m so sorry, Nance.” It’s barely above a whisper, but it makes Nancy’s stomach swoop regardless. 

Nance. 

She wants to hear her say it again.

Nancy shakes her head, “s’okay.” 

Robin’s grip grows firmer, but still as soft as ever. How does she do that? “It’s not, Nance. It’s not. I’m glad Steve got to him before I could, honestly. If I did, he would have ended up with two broken arms.” 

Nancy laughs, but Robin remains focused. “Arms, huh? Figured you’re the type to break someone’s kneecaps.” 

Robin shrugs, eyes still locked on Nancy’s. “He touched you. I’d definitely break his arms to make sure he can never do that again.”

Oh. 

Oh. 

It hits her all at once.

Nancy wants to kiss her. 

And she wants to laugh again, because of course. 

Of course it was going to be Robin. 

Didn’t someone say there’s a fine line between love and hate? 

If she moved even an inch, their noses would bump and the thought nearly sends Nancy into cardiac arrest from how much she wants. 

How much she wants to grab Robin by the collar and pull her in. 

How much she wants to taste Robin’s chapstick on her tongue. 

How much she wants to slot her lips between the taller girl’s. 

It’s scary when she realizes:

She’s wanted to do this for a while. 

Nancy watches as Robin’s eyes float down to her lips.

Is she thinking the same thing?

Nancy grabs onto Robin’s chin, pulling her ever so slightly closer. Everything falls out of vision, instead of seeing four white walls and a showerhead, all Nancy can see is Robin. 

All she can think is Robin. 

Robin, Robin, Robin. 

It’s a familiar mantra, but it’s the most delicious it’s ever felt. 

Nancy wants time to stop, to wrap them up in the universe so it’s just them two in the before.

Before potentially ruining a friendship.

Before the potential for more than a friendship. 

Robin’s tongue darts out, wetting her impossibly red lips. “Nance…”

But the moment, and Robin, is ripped away from her faster than she’d like as Max and El barge into the bathroom. 

The door swings open with a thud, and Robin backs away so fast her back hits the shower door. Nancy is sat breathless, watching Robin’s wide eyes and gasping breaths. 

“Nance, it’s been a while. Let’s get you home.” Max says as she wraps an arm around Nancy’s shoulders, picking her up from where she was sitting. Nancy can see El looking between her and Robin. Both breathless and refusing to look at the other. 

They walk Nancy out of the house with little to no protest from her, letting their gentle hands guide her through the crowd. 

She loves them, but she’s never been so mad at their protectiveness. 

What would have happened?

What did Nancy want to happen?

Did Robin even want the same thing?

Max and El pester her with questions the whole way home. Max apparently got the run down from Steve, but Nancy is too tired to hear it. El is rubbing small circles into her lower back. They get her home, into bed, and as Max and El say goodnight from across the room, Nancy can only mutter “g’night.” 

She felt exhausted on the way home, but now it’s like she drank five cups of coffee. Her heart and head are pounding, flashes of the night come back to her every time she closes her eyes. 

Jason’s hands on her waist. 

Steve punching him senseless on the ground. 

Robin forcing him to apologize. 

Robin’s hands on her waist. 

Robin’s hands on her face. 

Robin. Robin. Robin. 

She barely sleeps a wink, instead she thinks of red lips and black leather.

Chapter Text

It takes Nancy longer than she’d like to admit to feel like she’s back in her body. The night before left Nancy with a pounding headache, residual nausea, and a lot of unanswered questions. 

How can she repay Steve for saving her ass?

Did Max and El see the two girls in the bathroom as they barged in?

Did Robin want her?

She almost canceled the sorority meeting she had planned, but after Max and El brought her two hot cups of coffee and a bagel, she decided she needed to tough it out. It was her responsibility after all. 

There are ten girls on the executive board of DPhiE, and Nancy is looking at all of them as she talks about the events that are coming up. Her head is elsewhere, occupied by the smell of pine and the chorus of raspy laughter. 

“So, I know homecoming was a lot for our chapter and you’d probably like a weekend of rest, but we can’t forget about the date party on Friday. You all need to take someone from Sigma Chi, and wear something nice. If you show up in jeans, I will send you home.” Nancy hears the groans from around the room, “I know, it sucks, but it’s tradition. We can probably have an after party to let loose.” and at that, the groans stop, and she’s peering out into a sea of smiles. 

Chrissy Cunningham, the sorority’s recruitment officer, raises her hand. “What happened to the bylaw you were going to add, about girls joining fraternities.” 

Good question. A question Nancy doesn’t know the answer to.

I’m so busy with my class that I can’t work on a new bylaw.

I realized I sounded like my dad when I was creating it, and I’m not my dad.

I ended up wanting to make out with the girl the bylaw is about so I threw the idea away the moment it crossed my mind. 

But, Nancy just replies, “I’m working on it.” with a tight smile gracing her lips. Chrissy looks like she’s going to talk again, so Nancy wraps the meeting up earlier than usual. “Okay everyone, that’s it for today. See you at 7:00 PM on Friday at the event center downtown. Don’t be late.” 

El approaches as Nancy is packing up her things. “Who are you asking to the date party?” 

She really wants to ask Robin, but she’s not sure how or what the girl thinks of her at this point. 

“Uhh, I’ve been so busy planning it that I haven’t really thought of it.” 

El rolls her eyes, “I know someone you could ask.” A smirk graces her face as she pokes Nancy in the stomach. Nancy shoos her hand away. 

Nancy is a terrible liar, so she avoids El’s eyes. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“Oh, really? So there’s not a tall, leather-jacket-wearing, life-saving, totally in love with you,” Nancy shoots her a glare, though her cheeks heat up, “member of the frat? Huh, I could have sworn there was.” 

In love? El thinks Robin is in love with her? 

The thought makes Nancy’s heart beat rapidly. 

Deflect, deflect, deflect. “I think Steve’s gay, El.” 

El hits her shoulder, “you know who I’m talking about, Nance. Max and I saw you guys in the bathroom together.”

“No, I don’t think I do because nothing happened in the bathroom.” Nancy can’t help but feel her heart deflate at the sentiment. 

“Well, did you want something to happen?”

All Nancy can do is look at El with pleading eyes. 

I wanted it to happen so badly it hurts. 

El’s arms wrap around Nancy all of a sudden as she whispers “I’m sorry.” into Nancy’s ear. 

She doesn’t want to cry two days in a row, but the silent tears slip down her cheeks and into El’s sweatshirt. They pull back and she wipes her eyes of any trace of salty tears. 

“It’s good. I’m good. I did want something to happen, but I don’t think she felt the same.”

El looks offended at Nancy’s statement. “Have you seen the way she looks at you? Like you’re the moon and the ocean, like you’re the one who hung the sun, like you’re-”

“Okay, El, I get it. I just don’t know what to do…we have to work on this project together and I don’t think I can do that if she…doesn’t want me.” 

“Nancy, she wants you. Trust me.” El says as she grips Nancy’s hands, sending a shockwave of adrenaline through Nancy’s stomach. “I think you should go and ask her to the date party.” 

“Really?”

“Yes, really. Would I steer you wrong?”

“I guess not…”

“Okay, so go!” El pushes Nancy toward the door, slapping her on the butt as she does so. 

Nancy can do this. She can go ask her friend who she wanted to kiss last night out to the date party. She can face the most beautiful girl she’s seen and bare part of her soul. 

Right?

Nancy beelines from campus toward the fraternity house, sending a silent prayer that Robin is home. When she approaches, she sees a familiar face walking out of the door. 

“Hi Nancy! What’s up?” Vickie, one of the sorority girls, is shutting the wooden door to the looming house. What was Vickie doing here?

“Hi, Vick! Not much, I was just coming to see…yeah I’m not up to much! What about you?”

Vickie talks excitedly at Nancy, “I just asked Robin to be my date to the date party, and she said yes! I’m so excited. I’ve had a crush on her for like…” Vickie goes on as Nancy's heart breaks slowly. 

Vickie asked Robin to the date party.

Robin said yes. 

Any ounce of hope leaves Nancy's body. Robin doesn’t want her. Nancy made it all up. Her throat is dry and for a third time tears threaten to spill over onto her cheeks. She won’t let Vickie see her cry, not over this. 

“...anyway, I’ve gotta run home, but I’ll see ya Friday, Nance!” Her cheery voice is usually endearing, but now Nancy just wants to rip her hair out. 

Nancy sends a “see ya” at the girl fleeing the house.

Nancy is frozen to her spot on the sidewalk, unable to move even if she wanted to. She should want to, she should want to go home and crawl under her covers and never come out again. 

But all she wants is to see Robin. 

She’s biting her thumbnail, studying the door, as it swings open. 

Steve Harrington and his swoopy hair walk out the door, and as he spots her he shoots her a genuine smile. “Nancy! What’s up? You feelin’ okay after last night?” 

Nancy nods, clears her throat. “Yeah, I’m feeling fine. I just uh- wanted to thank you for what you did last night.”

Steve attempts to brush it off, “It’s no big deal, really. He had it coming for a while.” 

“No, it is a big deal. It means a lot, seriously.” 

Steve falters. “I’m glad you’re okay, Nancy. Really, I was so mad when I saw him doing that to you I just…snapped.”

A thought occurs to Nancy then. “Steve, would you like to come with me to the date party?” Why not, right? He’s nice, gay, and she needed a date. She could use a new friend as she probably just ruined her chances with her most recent one. 

“Uh, Nance, you know I’m dating Eddie, right?” Steve’s eyebrow is cocked and he’s looking at Nancy like she’s insane. 

“Duh, Steve. Plus, I’m a lesbian. It would be strictly platonic. I just needed a date and figured making a new friend along the way wouldn’t be so bad, right?” 

Steve looks like he’s mulling it over in his head, and a flash of guilt falls upon his face as he agrees. “Yeah, I guess don't see why not,” he smiles at her again, “pick you up at 6:45?”

“Perfect, thanks Steve.” Nancy says as they part ways on the sidewalk.

It’s not what she came for, but she’s not too mad about it. 

—

As Nancy sits in class, she can’t stop thinking about Robin and Vickie. Vickie and Robin. Did Robin like her? Is that why she hesitated to kiss Nancy that night? 

She knows the main subject of her thoughts is sitting less than a foot from her, but they’ve barely spoken to each other since Saturday and it’s driving Nancy crazy. 

Robin’s leg is bouncing at a pace too fast, and all Nancy wants to do is put her hand on her thigh to calm her. 

Robin is chewing on the end of her pencil, and all Nancy wants to do is pluck it out of her mouth and replace its existence with her lips. 

God, this was impossible. 

But they still needed to write their paper, they still needed each other for a grade, if not for anything else. 

Fuck, that hurts. 

What if they’re not the same after what happened just two days ago? What if Robin never wants to speak to Nancy again? What if Nancy wants to ruin everything more and tell her how she feels, knowing she’ll be shot down? 

Her thoughts are broken by the very person she’s thinking about. “Uh, hey.” Robin’s eyes don’t meet Nancy’s as she continues. “I have some stuff this week and I don’t think I can meet to work on the project. I can start writing my section and you can write yours. S’that okay?”

No, that’s not okay, Nancy thinks. 

It’s not okay because I want to see you, it’s not okay because I want everything to go back to the way it was before. 

It was easier to hate you, Nancy thinks. 

Nancy nods. That’s all she can muster without her voice failing her. 

So, she won’t see her outside of class. That’s okay, she can handle that. 

—

Robin skips the next two class sessions. Nancy thought she was late the first time, she was unable to keep her eyes off the door just hoping she would see chopped blonde hair and high cheekbones. 

She couldn’t help but deflate when thirty minutes pass and Robin doesn’t waltz in.

By class time on Friday, Nancy is buzzing to see Robin again. 

But, just like on Wednesday, she doesn't show.

Nancy hopes she’s getting her work done. 

Nancy hopes Robin isn’t avoiding her. 

She can’t help the nagging feeling that she is. 

—

Nancy stood in front of her mirror for far too long. As she gazes at herself in an off the shoulder red dress, she tries to muster a smile.

She fails.

Her hair is curled masterfully, her makeup is applied thicker than usual, and her high heels make her short legs look miles long. 

She might not be elated, but she can recognize that she looks good. 

The thought of Robin seeing her in this crossed Nancy’s mind once or twice, which always sent a swoop into her stomach and the fire in her chest sparked up.

She can do this, she can face Robin with a girl, and she can be fine. 

Steve keeps his word. He’s at Nancy’s by 6:44, decorated in a suit and tie as he opens the passenger door for Nancy.
“Very chivalrous.” Nancy laughs. 

“What can I say, I basically wrote the book on chivalry.” Steve shoots her a lopsided grin and they fall into casual conversation. 

The event center falls into view, and Nancy is actually shocked by how many people are on time. There’s girls in long gowns with a suited man at their side. Nancy can’t help but look for Robin, and her heart sinks when she doesn’t see her. 

Steve parks and offers Nancy his arm as they walk inside. There’s round tables scattered around the room, a dance floor accompanied by a DJ, and a table full of delicious looking food and punch in the corner. 

Nancy sits at the round table closest to the DJ and watches the droves of people arrive. El and Max are arm in arm, both wearing beautiful dresses, as they walk through the door. Nancy shoots them a look as they waltz up to the table. 

“El, you were supposed to bring someone from the frat.” Nancy tries to be stern, but the happy looks on Max and El’s faces is too beautiful. 

El blushes in her cheeks, as well as Max as they stare at each other for a beat too long. “We- I- Max-”

Max cuts her off, “we’re dating.” 

Oh.

Oh! 

“Oh, oh my god you guys! I should have seen this coming, my god come here.” Nancy gets up and squishes them into a hug. 

Her best friends are dating. 

And they look so, so happy.

Nancy is happy for them, she genuinely is. But there’s a part of her, the part of her that is so evil, that sprouts a vine of jealousy. Max and El are not her and Robin, but the looks on their faces and their soft touches make Nancy feel so alone. 

“You’re not mad?” El eyes Nancy after they pull away from the bone crushing hug. 

“I could never be mad at you guys. You’re gonna have to tell me everything tonight!” And she means it, she could never be mad at them, not truly. 

The girls say hello to Steve as they sit, the four of them making quiet conversation. Nancy feels good. She feels so good that she almost forgot Robin was going to be here. Nancy stares at Steve and thinks, I totally would have dated him in high school. The thought makes her laugh, but he’s just so great and totally her type before she realized she strictly liked women. Steve catches her eye, and laughs too, even though he has no clue what he’s laughing about. 

Nancy looks at El and Max whose faces have fallen as they stare off in the distance. Nancy turns slightly to catch what they’re looking at. 

The laugh dies on her lips as she sees Robin, hand in hand with Vickie. 

The sight of Robin nearly sends Nancy falling out of her chair, but she composes herself the best she can.

Robin is wearing a brown suit, but she’s holding the matching jacket in her free hand, so the only thing she’s wearing is a white t-shirt tucked into brown dress pants. 

Fuck, she looks good.

She’s wearing the rings that Nancy has taken to stare at during class. Her hair is half up, held back with a brown clip, and she is the most beautiful person Nancy has ever seen. 

Nancy can see Vickie get on her tippy-toes to whisper something into Robin’s ear, and Robin tilts her head back to laugh. Her neck is on full display, a vast of white dotted with brown moles, and Nancy can’t look away. Robin leans down, brushes Vickie's hair behind her ear, and whispers something back. Vickie blushes and bats her eyelashes at Robin. 

Nancy feels sick. She wants to run out of the room and cause a scene. She wants to fold in on herself, never to be seen again. 

That should be her. She should be the one holding Robin’s hand. She should be the one making her laugh. She should be the one that blushes at Robin’s raspy voice and kind words.

She had that, at one point. 

But not anymore. 

Nancy misses when she would look at Robin and only feel the burning fire of hatred. Nancy misses when not seeing Robin would put her in a good mood for the next week. All too quickly, without Nancy’s permission, the fire transformed into something else. Over the early mornings and late nights, shared cups of coffee and looks across the library, light touches and blush on cheeks.

Nancy has fallen for the one person she can’t have.

The sand has slipped through her fingers, leaving her with nothing but dirty hands and a broken heart. 

She can’t be mad at Robin, not one bit. Robin doesn’t feel the same, she’s with Vickie tonight, and she has no clue Nancy might have fallen for her. She wants- no- she needs to be friends with Robin. Her grades, graduation, and sanity rely on it. Robin can never find out Nancy feels this way. Nancy won’t be able to deal with the sad rejection, the guilty eyes. All Nancy can do is acknowledge how she feels in the moment.

Lonely.

Sad. 

Dejected. 

Hopeless. 

She feels a hand snake around her arm and follows Steve as he guides her up from her chair. He’s saying something excitedly, but Nancy can’t hear what. All she knows is that he’s guiding her closer and closer to Robin. When pine fills her senses, her brain screams run, run, run.

Her body betrays her as she stays planted in front of Robin. Vickie is nowhere to be found.

Nancy can breathe easier. 

“Stevie, looking good this evening.” Robin pats Steve on the shoulder. Her voice sends Nancy back to herself, all rasp and warmth.

“As do you, Rob.” 

Robin turns to her then, and the sudden eye contact is simultaneously everything Nancy has wanted for the past week and nothing Nancy wants now. Her light blue eyes track Nancy’s body up and down, just like they had when they first met. Robin’s throat bobs as a warm flush spreads across her freckles. 

“You look nice, Wheeler.” Robin coughs out, no longer able to make direct eye contact. Nancy’s heart stutters on ‘Wheeler’, missing the girl's raspy voice and the way it pronounces her name. She’ll take what she can get. 

“Thanks Buckley, so do you.” It comes out stronger than Nancy thought it would, and she gives herself an imaginary pat on the back.

Good job keeping your composure, Nance. 

“Hey guys! Steve, you look very dapper and Nancy, oh my God that color on you is divine!” Vickie’s voice is like nails on a chalkboard as she slides up against Robin’s side. Robin’s eyes are studying Nancy as Vickie continues to talk. The opening notes of a song Nancy’s heard before fill the auditorium, and Nancy watches as Vickie grabs Robin’s hand, exclaiming this is her favorite song, and pulling her onto the dance floor. 

Steve raises an eyebrow at Nancy, cocking his head towards the growing crowd on the dance floor. “Shall we?” 

Nancy can’t help but smile as she extends her hand toward him. “We shall.” 

If she’s going to be sad, she may as well try to dance it off. 

The melody is slow and soft as she wraps her arms around Steve’s neck, his hands falling gracefully around her waist. They sway together slowly as the lyrics fill Nancy’s brain. 

Wherever you go

Whatever you do

I will be right here waiting for you

Whatever it takes

Or how my heart breaks

I will be right here waiting for you

Nancy looks up from where she’s resting on Steve’s shoulder and looks around the room. El and Max are holding each other like their lives depended on it, swaying to the music and laughing when Max trips up a little. 

Nancy scans the room again, but this time she catches Robin’s eyes. The golden lights are bouncing off of her. She looks like an angel. Every fibre of Nancy’s being is on fire as they refuse to break eye contact. Robin holding Vickie, Nancy leaning on Steve. Nancy can’t seem to look away, and neither can Robin. 

I took for granted, all the times

That I thought would last somehow

I hear the laughter, I taste the tears

But I can't get near you now

Nancy swears that when light reflects off of Robin’s eyes, they almost look like they’re glistening. Like she’s crying. Why would she be crying?

Oh, can't you see it, baby?

You've got me going crazy

Nancy and Steve naturally turn themselves as they sway, and Nancy silently pleads she doesn’t turn around fully so she can’t see Robin anymore. The universe didn’t listen, and Steve turns her so Robin is just out of her eyesight. 

But, Nancy swears she can still feel icy blue eyes on her.

Suddenly, she’s freezing.

I wonder how we can survive

This romance

But in the end if I'm with you

I'll take the chance.

She’s cold the rest of the night. 

Chapter Text

“Rob, what does this even say?” 

“Wha- oh. It says ‘Mikhail Gorbachev visited East Germany for its forty year anniversary of being formed’”. She said so matter-of-factly. 

“I don’t think we should include actual Russian in our paper, I don’t think Byers knows a lick of it.” Nancy shuffles the papers in her hands, looking for any trace of Russian written on them. 

Robin grumbles out a “fine”, and snatches the paper from Nancy’s hands with playful eyeroll. 

Things have been…strangely normal between them. Well, of course it has. Robin doesn’t know that she’s the object of Nancy’s growing affection. Robin doesn’t know that it’s starting to become a massive pain in Nancy’s ass. 

Robin came back to class like nothing happened the following week, and Nancy could handle it. She could handle having Robin next to her for fifty minutes at a time with a proper distraction (thank you, Dr. Byers). But their after class work sessions? 

Those were getting more difficult.

Nothing has changed on Robin’s part. She’s still the funny, frustrating, smart, good-looking, Russian knowing girl that Nancy’s grade relies on. And that’s the worst bit. Robin is still the same, it’s Nancy that’s changed. 

Now instead of zoning out on black ink pressed to white paper, Nancy zones out on the veins that decorate Robin’s hand as she’s writing. She zones out on the way Robin sits with her legs spread apart, taking up as much space as she can because she can. She zones out on the sharp cheekbones that structure her face. If Robin’s caught on to her staring, she hasn’t made it known. 

Nancy has begun to notice the way Robin’s eyes light up when they banter, especially when Robin fake flirts with her. It’s like bothering Nancy gives her the spark she needs to keep going. Honestly, it’s probably why they’ve been butting heads for the past three years- Robin lives for it. Nancy a couple of months ago would have found it incredibly frustrating, but Nancy now finds it frustratingly adorable. Basically that’s how she feels about Robin: she’s so adorable it’s frustrating, because Nancy can’t have her. 

She’s often wondered what this project or this year would have been like if Byers assigned her a different partner. Would she still have her heart broken, just in a different way? Would she have needed to learn the Russian translation for peace? Would she have ever come to know Robin Buckley and the intricacies of her brain? In some ways she’s grateful that Dr. Byers didn’t allow them to switch partners- in other ways, she wishes nothing more than to go back in time and never join the class. Ignorance was bliss. 

“Wheeler,” Robin’s voice breaks the thick silence of the library, “I need to stop by Byer’s office hours real quick to drop something off, mind if I head out?”

“Oh! I was going to head there anyway, I needed to ask a couple of questions regarding her TA position next year. I can just head there and drop off what you need to give her?” 

Robin’s eyebrows twitch slightly, “uh, sure princess, sounds good. Here.” Robin digs through her bag as she pulls out a thick hardcover book. It’s a book on the Cold War. “She let me borrow it for a source, should have given it back to her a while ago. Tell her I'm sorry.” Robin says with a smile as she watches Nancy get up from the cushioned seat. 

“Gotcha, see ya tomorrow, Buckley.” Nancy chirps as she walks away from the girl. 

The walk to Dr. Byer’s office in the humanities building isn’t far from the library. The first week of November brought on a dusting of snow on the ground, cold winds that could knock Nancy off her feet, and the promise of a white Christmas. Nancy has always loved winter, despite running colder than the average person. She loves the deafening silence as snow coats every inch of green, the footprints on the ground indicating ‘I was here’ all around her, and the guarantee she’ll see her family for winter break. 

The snow dusted treetops make her feel like she’s a kid again. Her mother once told her that a little snow fairy comes and sprinkles powdered sugar on top of all the trees. Nancy thought it was the most magical part of the season. She knows now that her mother was trying to create special memories for her, and part of her hopes one day she can do that too. 

The warmth that blankets her as she walks into the humanities building  has her pulling off her scarf, sweat already pooling at the hairs on the nape of her neck. Dr. Byer’s door is already open by the time she arrives, but she doesn't hear any voices, so she knocks lightly before entering. 

Dr. Byers is sitting at her desk with a pile of papers to her left. “Miss Wheeler, how can I help you?” She’s always been the nicest professor Nancy has ever had. She’s almost going to be sad when she finishes her class in a couple of weeks. For more than one reason. 

“I have a couple of questions for you about the TA position in your class next semester, and,” Nancy holds up Robin’s book in front of Dr. Byers, “I have Robin’s book she needed to give you, she says she’s sorry it took so long.” 

Dr. Byers waves her hand, “oh, you tell Miss Buckley that it’s no big deal. I have all these books and nothing to do with them!” Dr. Byers laughs as she takes the book from Nancy’s hands. “You know, when Robin came to me asking if you two could be partners, I wasn’t sure I was going to let it slide. You guys seem to be doing well together.” Her smile is soft, and-

Wait, what?

She must have heard her wrong. No way in hell did Robin Buckley ask their professor for them to be partners. 

“Robin…asked you…if we could be partners?” Nancy’s eyebrows knit together as she studies Dr. Byer’s face for any hint of amusement. 

“You didn’t know? That girl had the nicest things to say about you…I originally was going to pair you up with Mr. Munson, but Robin had asked me if you could work on it together.” Nancy can only stare at Dr. Byers as her mind races to find a reason. 

Robin claimed she had begged Dr. Byers to switch partners…Robin looked as pissed at them being partners as Nancy had…Robin had agreed every single time that it would be better had they not been partners. 

So why would she ask Dr. Byers if they could be partners? No, scratch that, why would she beg Dr. Byers to let them be partners?

Was it to get under Nancy’s skin? Was it to knock her down from her place at the top of the class? Was it to force Nancy to do all of the work for the assignment? 

Why would Robin lie to her? After all of this time, three months of working on this together, was all built on the foundation of a lie.
Nancy’s heart is burning a hole straight through her chest, and she’s okay if it burns down the whole building. 

Why would Robin do that? Why would she lie?

She sprints out of the office and down the hall, but not before she yelps out ‘thank you Dr. Byers, see you in class’. Her beeline to the library is full of racing thoughts and cold hands, but she doesn’t care. She needs to know.

Why Robin lied.

Why Robin begged Dr. Byers to let them work together. 

Why Robin has filled every crevice in Nancy’s heart until there was no room left. She won’t ask her that, but God does she want to. 

Nancy swings open the doors to the library, the stale air barely registering to her as she makes her way to the back tables. 

Robin is nowhere to be found. 

Frat house. 

The walk to the frat house allows for some time for Nancy to rethink what she’s doing. She’s going to the girl she’s falling for’s house to…ask her why she begged their professor to be partners? 

Why the fuck was she doing this?

But as she approaches the old house, she knows why. 

For some godforsaken reason, she feels betrayed. Lied to. Kept out of the loop. And Nancy Wheeler does not like to be out of the loop. It wasn’t fair for her to manipulate things like that.

And if part of her is mad that Nancy’s feelings toward Robin, good and bad, wouldn’t have stemmed if not for Robin doing this, then that’s her business. 

She doesn’t even knock, just pushes her way inside. Steve and Eddie are on the couch, she should say hi to them, but she dashes upstairs. 

She realizes she doesn’t actually know where Robin’s room is. She’s only ever been in one room- the bathroom. Robin’s lips plague her thoughts as she tries to guess which door is hers. 

She figures that the door with the sign “No Boys Allowed: Hot Girls Only” must belong to Robin. This time, she does stop to knock on the door. 

Nancy hears footsteps and her heart picks up. Fuck, what is she going to say?

Robin opens the door, looking and smelling the same as she did not even half an hour ago. Nancy can only see a tiny portion of Robin’s room, but from the looks of it every inch of wallspace is covered in band and movie posters. 

“Hi, princess. To what do I owe this housecall?” Robin smirks as she gestures toward Nancy.

“Why did you beg Byers to be my partner?” Nancy doesn’t want to waste time. Her voice is hoarse, showing cracks of emotion she wanted to keep hidden away. Robin’s jaw has dropped and she’s giving Nancy the most shocked look possible. “And why did you lie to me about it?” 

Robin’s face has dropped into one of guilt. She looks like a puppy who just got caught ripping up pillows, tail between its legs. “Nance, I can explain.”

Nancy gestures towards Robin. “Go on, explain then. Explain why you lied to me, why you begged Dr. Byers to be my partner when I didn't want you to be, and why I had to find out from our professor after all this time.” 

Robin’s face hardens into stone. Her jaw is set, her eyes are narrowed, and her hands are at fists by her side. “I just needed you for a good grade.” She spits out, fire coating her scornful words. 

And, ouch. 

Was that all Nancy was to her? She could handle just being friends- acquaintances even. But this? Being reduced to nothing but a grade? 

Nancy can feel her heart sprouting cracks, just one more hit would shatter it for good. 

At Nancy’s silence, Robin starts again. “You thought this was more than just a grade? I didn’t take you for being naive, Wheeler.” Her voice cracks on the syllables, and the anger lacing her tone slaps Nancy across the face, but she doesn’t miss the way Robin’s eyes shine in the low light. The tears threatening to spill over Nancy’s eyes match the ones Robin is sporting. 

Nancy’s heart shatters. She looks down, almost expecting to see a mess of blood and gore in front of her feet, but her heart is situated perfectly behind her chest. 

“Fuck you.” Nancy spits out as she turns to walk down the hall. She lets the tears fall once she knows Robin can’t see her face. 

“You wish.” Robin shouts back, her voice breaking on the last word. 

It’s all so painfully familiar to their first conversation in this very house that it almost makes Nancy want to laugh. How could she be so stupid? How it started was always going to be how it ends. 

With a slammed door and hot flames beneath her skin. 

Chapter Text

Nancy hasn’t seen Robin in three days.

Well, that’s not entirely true. 

She’s seen her in class, but now instead of being seated on Nancy’s left, she’s all the way across the room, seated right next to Steve and Eddie. 

They haven’t met up to work on their project. They haven’t even spoken a word to each other. Every look that Robin sends in Nancy's direction is ice cold. 

Nancy has gotten everything she used to wish for.

But she doesn’t want it anymore. 

She wants light blue eyes, sandy blonde hair, crimson flushed cheeks, raspy laughter, and the incessant need to move. She wants soft freckled hands heating up her skin, effortless banter, late nights in the library, and the crackling embers in her chest to ignite again. 

But, she doesn’t have that anymore. 

She has dedicated herself to writing more of the essay, but every time she puts pen to paper all she can think about is Robin. So instead of going to the library, she went straight home after her third class of the day was finished. Her and El had been chatting in Nancy’s bed all day, Nancy squished up against the wall as El lay down next to her. 

Nancy can hear someone ringing the doorbell, and she figures one of the other girls in the house will get it. After five rings, El huffs as she drops down from Nancy’s bed and makes her way downstairs. Nancy can hear faint voices wafting through the quiet house. 

“...I know…just…I need to talk to her. It’s important.”

“She’s busy.”

“Please.”

“Go home, Robin.”

At that, Nancy flings her comforter off and marches to the top of the stairs. She can see Robin and El in the doorway, El is actively trying to push Robin out of the house as she clutches a newspaper. Robin catches Nancy’s eye. The sight of Robin makes every hair on her body stand up straight. 

She’s still the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen. 

“Nance, please I know you hate me right now and you have every right. But this,” Robin holds up the front page of the newspaper so Nancy can see, “is important. Please, just let me come upstairs.” Robin is pleading, and Nancy wants to kick her out of the house so she can feel as bad as she does. 

She gestures for her to come upstairs instead. 

Nancy rushes around her room picking up clothes from the floor and straightening the knick-knacks on top of her dresser. Robin walks through the door and Nancy can see her studying the four walls. 

“So, what did you need me to see?” Nancy plops down on her bed as Robin extends the paper to her. Nancy reads aloud to herself, “November Ninth…USSR…the Berlin Wall fell?” Nancy looks up to find Robin biting her lip and nodding her head. Robin takes a seat on Nancy’s bed next to her, her breath ghosting the shorter girl’s neck. 

Her soft and raspy voice is like music to Nancy’s ears, contrasting the voice Nancy heard just a few days ago. “I think this is how we finish our paper, there’s no way Byers won’t give us an A if we cover this.” The exciting radiating off of Robin is enough for Nancy to feel it too. Nancy almost forgets about how Robin broke her heart.

Almost. 

This is huge news and would guarantee them an A if they pulled it off properly. So, they better pull it off. 

“Okay then, let’s get to work.” Nancy says as she gets off her bed and heads to her desk. She grabs all the necessary supplies and makes a spot for them on the floor. After Robin settles in next to her, books and papers and photocopies scattered in front of them, they get to work. 

They’re next to silent, almost like that first day in the library. Nancy writes until her fingers cramp, and Robin reads until the words start to blend together on the page. They’re both bleary eyed and exhausted by the time it’s 2:00AM, but it’s done. 

Their paper in all of its thirty-one pages, is done. Robin and Nancy give each other the most pathetic high five anyone could muster, but they don’t care. They don’t care because tomorrow they’ll be able to turn their rough draft in. 

Nancy should feel good about this, but a harsh realization hits her then. 

After this, Robin and Nancy will have no need for each other anymore. 

The weight that was removed from her shoulders just a few short minutes ago is now back, pressing heavy on her chest until she feels like she’s choking. 

Nancy turns to Robin, who’s already staring at her. Her big blue eyes reveal nothing, but Nancy still looks for something, anything in them. “I’m gonna call Steve to come pick me up, s’too cold to walk home.” Robin rasps out. 

Nancy yawns, “I can take you.” 

“Wheeler, I don’t trust you behind the wheel right now. Get it, hah. Wheeler. Wheel.” Robin laughs out. 

Nancy doesn't want to give her the satisfaction of laughing at her stupid joke, but she can’t help it. Maybe it’s the sleep deprivation. 

Maybe it’s the sun bursting out of her chest. 

“Okay, fair. But don’t call Steve, he shouldn’t be driving out there either.” 

“Okay, so if I shouldn’t walk home, and you shouldn’t drive me, but Steve shouldn’t either, then what should I do?” 

Nancy falters. “You can just sleep here.” is out of her mouth before she can stop it. 

Robin’s eyebrows shoot up to her hairline, “Uh, okay sure. I can take the floor.” She gestures at El sleeping soundly in her own bed. 

Nancy waves her off, “don’t be silly. I can take the floor, you take the bed.” 

“Nance, I’m not going to take your bed.”

“Well, if you refuse to sleep on the floor and you won’t let me sleep on the floor, we can share my bed.”

Robin laughs, “you think we can fit on that?”

And, fair. Nancy looks at her twin sized mattress pressed up against the wall. They could fit, they would just be very, very close. 

Nancy narrows her eyes, “humor me.” 

Robin steals another look of the bed, blush creeping up her cheeks. “Fine. But I need a change of clothes and a toothbrush, I’m not sleeping in jeans.” 

Nancy picks out a pair of old sweatpants and a large shirt, and grabs an extra toothbrush from the back of the cabinet in the bathroom. She leaves Robin to get ready as she slips on her own sleeping set. 

Robin emerges from the bathroom and Nancy’s throat goes dry. Seeing Robin in regular clothes was hard enough, but seeing her in Nancy’s clothes was near impossible. The shirt, though large on Nancy, rests right above the sweatpants draped from Robin’s waist. Nancy can see the sliver of skin and hipbone protruding from the open space, and she can’t help her poor heart from racing. Robin clambers into Nancy’s bed, insisting that she sleeps on the outside because ‘her long legs can’t handle being against the wall’. Nancy agreed with a laugh. 

The Boston city lights shine their way into Nancy’s bedroom, lighting up the space between the girls ever so slightly. They’re facing each other, noses less than an inch apart as they share Nancy’s pillow. 

The backlight is casting a halo over Robin. Robin Buckley looks like an angel. 

Nancy feels the tickle of her hair brushing her cheek, but before she can move it, Robin gently swipes it out of the way and behind her ear. The movement makes Nancy’s heart freeze in her chest, and the feeling of Robin’s hand back on her skin is intoxicating, if only for a moment. Nancy’s breathing goes shallow and Robin’s eyes trace her face. 

“Sorry.” Robin says barely above a whisper. 

“Don’t be.” Nancy whispers back. 

Robin swallows harshly as she locks her eyes on Nancy. “Not for that. Just- for everything. I’m sorry I said all that shit, I didn’t mean it.” Her voice is so gentle but so firm at the same time, and Nancy’s breath escapes her lips at the honesty.

“It’s-it’s fine. I get it.” She doesn’t. She doesn’t get why Robin said all that stuff. But the girl who has her heart is in front of her, dropping sand-sized bits of her heart into her palm again, and nothing else matters. 

Robin’s hand moves up slowly to cup Nancy’s jaw, just like she did at the party. Nancy feels like she’s falling and floating all at once.

“No, it’s not fine. What I said- what I did- was fucked up. There were so many times I wanted to tell you that I- I asked Byers to make us partners, but every time I tried the words would dry up in my throat.” Robin uses her thumb to stroke Nancy’s jaw, “it wasn’t fair. I didn't mean anything I said to you. It’s not just about the grade, Nance. I thought we were having fun, that you liked being my partner, and when I saw how pissed you were, I just built my walls right back up.” 

Her words are making Nancy feel drunk, and the light pressure on her skin blossoms heat to her cheeks. Robin is being so gentle it almost aches. 

Nancy grabs the hand on her jaw. “Robs, I understand. I’m sorry, too.” Robin shakes her head in opposition to Nancy’s apology, eyes turning downward as Nancy continues. “Just let me explain, I did- I do like being your partner. I don’t know why I reacted like that, and I’m sorry. I like being your friend, Buckley.”

Robin’s eyes shoot up to Nancy’s. “Friend?” 

Nancy can’t help the smile that blooms. “Yeah, we’re friends, right?” 

Robin matches her smile back. “Right.” 

Robin moves her hand from Nancy’s jaw to put it under their pillow, and Nancy aches for contact again. If she can’t have Robin in the way she wants, she still wants Robin in any way she’ll give her. Platonic or not. Nancy watches as Robin’s eyes flutter shut and her breathing evens out. 

Once Nancy knows Robin is sleeping, she can’t help but trace her face with her eyes. 

Just barely above a whisper, Nancy unleashes her soul to Robin. 

“I don’t know how to stop myself from falling in love with you.” 

—

Nancy could have sworn that during the early morning sunrise, when the sun casts a pale yellow over the world and the cardinals signal for Boston to wake up, there was a firm pressure along her torso, and the even breathing from the girl holding her. But when she woke up, she was alone in her bed, feeling cold and untethered to the world. 

The thought hits Nancy square in the chest, sinking her heart into the deep pit that is her empty stomach, sending her mind on a roller coaster of ups and downs. Robin heard her quiet confession under the blanket of night and got scared. Or, Robin was in the bathroom brushing her teeth, the picture of perfect domesticity. Nancy swings her pink comforter off her body and sneaks over to right outside the bathroom, careful not to wake up any of the girls in the house. The light is off, the door is cracked open a smidge, and Robin is nowhere in sight. 

Nancy, feeling defeated, retreats back to her cold sheets and settles on the rock hard mattress that once felt soft in the dead of night. Nancy glances at her clock and rolls her eyes when she realizes it’s only 6:38AM. She still has less than an hour and a half until her and Robin’s class. She tries to slip back into sleep, but gets abruptly interrupted when something slams her door into her wall. 

“Fuck, shit, sorry. Did I wake you? I’m probably the clumsiest person you’ll ever meet, but at least I saved this!” Robin is juggling three cups of coffee in her hands, holding one out toward Nancy. 

Fuck, how could she not fall for this girl? 

Nancy rubs her eyes, “you didn’t wake me up. Gimme that.” She opens and shuts her outstretched hand towards Robin, who is making her way across the room. Once the burning sensation of coffee has touched her tongue, she feels like she’s already half-way to functioning. “Who’s the other cup for?” 

Robin glances toward El, who is somehow still peacefully sleeping. “I feel bad for last night- all the drama and blahh.” Robin sticks her tongue out like she tasted something sour. It’s cute. Ugh. 

Nancy takes another sip of her coffee. Three-fourths to functioning. “That’s very nice of you, Buckley.” 

Robin has a shit eating grin on her face, “some people say I’m the nicest girl around.” 

“Well, those people must not have known you three years ago.” Nancy is laughing, but as she looks up at Robin, her face is stricken with sadness. 

Robin takes a seat next to Nancy on her bed, cradling the coffee cup in between her hands, staring down at it like if she looks away it’ll grow two feet and run. Her voice is strained as she starts. “Yeah, I- uh, I’ve always wanted to apologize to you. I was an idiot, to put it plainly. I had all these things in my head- what I wanted to say, who I wanted to be. But every time I opened my mouth, it all came out wrong. Still does.” She chuckles dryly as she meets Nancy’s eyes. Her leg is bouncing against the bed, a nervous tick that Nancy picked up on early in the semester. 

She thinks about it this time, she mulls it through in her head. Nancy puts her hand on Robin’s knee, stilling it instantly. 

Nancy has noticed that whenever her and Robin touch, two things occur. A jolt of electricity pulses through Nancy, shocking her insides, making her skin tingle from the depths of her core. Then, a wash of calm rushes over her. Like the ocean washing over the shore; like laying out in the sun. Impossible heat and calm freezes Nancy’s insides, making her feel completely whole. She hopes Robin feels the same. 

With her hand touching Robin, Nancy is fully functioning. 

“I wasn’t the nicest person either,” Nancy shakes her head, remembering all the shit they put each other through, “I think, if we can forgive each other, maybe we can start over?” 

Robin places her hand on top of Nancy’s, warm meeting cold. “I’d like that.” Her smile is so true and soft, that Nancy doubts the voice in her brain saying that she’s the only one with feelings. 

Nancy reluctantly takes her hand from under Robin’s, and extends it out toward the girl. “Hi, I’m Nancy Wheeler. You’re Robin, right?” Her cheeks could split open from how hard she’s smiling.

Robin looks at her for a moment, as if she doesn’t remember their first meeting. For that moment, Nancy feels stupid for remembering it in full detail three years later. But then, Robin takes her hand, her smile growing bigger than she’s ever seen. “You would be correct. I’m Robin Buckley, nice to meet you, Nancy Wheeler.” 

They’re both staring into each other's eyes and shaking each other’s hands as if this is the first time they’re meeting. 

Maybe it is.

Chapter Text

“Miss Wheeler, Miss Buckley, you have outdone yourselves. I’ll read through your paper this weekend and get notes to you by Monday. Go celebrate your hard work, you deserve it.” Dr. Byer’s words are still ringing in Nancy’s head, even though it had been hours since they were in that lecture hall together. 

Now, they’re at the Sigma Chi house, on Robin’s bed, brainstorming a party for the night. Nancy hadn’t had time to notice before, but Robin’s room smelled just like she does. It makes sense, of course it smells like the girl who lives in it, but it’s not just that. Walking into Robin’s room felt like being blanketed in all that is Robin. Movies Nancy has never heard of that Robin promises to show her one day, sweatshirts that look as soft as Robin is, the smell of pine and lavender quieting her busy brain, it’s all so Robin. Nancy can’t get enough. 

“Okay, if I call Steve to call Eddie to call the guy we get our kegs from, I think we could make this work. I could get some of the guys to call around and make sure people come.” Robin says as she goes to the phone in her room. 

“I can give some of the sorority girls a call, I bet they’d be down for a party tonight.” Nancy says. Robin snaps her fingers and shoots her a grin.

They decide that, though the party would be last minute, it could be one of the biggest of the year. 

“Just think about it. It’s right before mid-terms, right before Thanksgiving break, people need to be drunk right now or they’ll lose their shit.” and Nancy wholeheartedly agreed. 

As Robin hangs up the phone with Steve, who promises to call Eddie, who promises to call their keg guy, it’s Nancy’s turn to make a few phone calls. She calls El and Max, which is a surefire way to get the information out. After Nancy hangs up, Robin's phone rings. Robin answers it, thinking it’s Steve with more questions, but when the voice crackles through the receiver, Robin’s brows furrow. 

Though the phone is pressed up against Robin’s ear, Nancy can hear the cheery lilt of the person on the other end. She can picture her- huge smile on her face, red-tinted hair falling on her forehead, fingers twirling the phone cord. 

Robin keeps it brief, retelling Vickie the information they had decided about when the party was happening. 

Vickie called Robin about the party, who Nancy was sure she heard from one of the sorority girls, but she felt so stupid. She didn’t even think about the fact that Robin’s girlfriend? Girl who she’s interested in? Girl who she took to the date party? Would be there tonight. 

Robin’s not her girlfriend. Nancy knows that. She knows she shouldn’t have any feelings regarding who Robin is with whatsoever. 

But that doesn’t mean it hurts any less. 

Robin must not have noticed Nancy’s shift, thank god, because she’s back to talking about the party. She’s rambling on and on about how they deserve this, how fun it’ll be, how Nancy can see what a Sigma Chi party is like without the threat of an asshole ready to ruin her fun. 

Nancy’s excited. Of course she’s excited. She’s going to finally relax, party with her friends, and dance. But, thinking about Vickie and Robin, though the party is hours away, made her want to yank her own hair out. And she likes her hair, so it would be a travesty. 

Nancy lets Robin finish her ramble, assures her that she’ll be back in time for the party, and makes her way out of the house. Not before giving Robin a soft smile, and getting one in return. 

—

“So she SLEPT OVER and NOTHING happened?” Max yelled at Nancy from El’s bed, throwing pillows at her. 

Nancy blocks them from hitting her face. “No…nothing…happened. Okay you’ve really got to stop throw-”

“BULLSEYE!” Max pumps her fist in triumph as a pink bunny hits Nancy square in the face. 

Nancy throws one back at her, missing and ultimately hitting the wall. “Of course nothing was going to happen. She doesn’t think of me like that,” Max reaches to throw another stuffed animal, “AND El was sleeping five feet away, I wouldn’t do that.”

El puts her hand up. “I didn’t even know she slept over so I don’t think I would have noticed.” 

Max points at El. “Yeah, she doesn’t even care.” 

“Okay, well, my point still stands. She doesn’t think of me that way.”

“If you keep saying dumb shit I’m going to come over there and-”

“And what, Max? Suffocate me to death with Mr. Rabbit?” 

“Okay, whatever. Listen Nance, we’ve seen how she is with you.” Max says as she gives up her threat. 

“Yeah, but you guys are my best friends so your opinions are clouded.”

El raises her hand again. “I don’t even like you that much so my opinion isn’t even clouded.” Her laughing becomes muffled when Nancy tackles them both on the bed, ruffing up their hair and lightly smacking them. “Okay obviously I love you, I’m just saying I don’t think my judgement is wrong.” El says as she pushes Nancy off the two of them and fixes her hair. 

“Well, I do, and that’s final.” 

“Fine.”

“Yeah, fine.” El echoes Max. 

They don’t give it up. Up until they’re opening the door to the Sigma Chi house, their comments have been neither subtle or slowing down. 

When Nancy was getting her hair done by Max, El walked over with two options of lipstick. “Which one do you think will make Robin want to kiss the shit out of Nancy?” and after Max chose the red one, El messily applied it to Nancy's lips. 

When they were taking shots of vodka to warm up, Max looked at El and said “how many of those do you think it’ll take Nance to man up and tell Robin how she feels?” After El suggested it would take five shots, Max said “well, we gotta hurry it up then.” before handing Nancy another full shotglass. 

Right when they’re about to open the door, El turns to Max and says “five bucks says Robin is standing at the door.” Max takes her up on the deal.

They open the door, and standing there is Robin Buckley. Nancy can hear Max and El snickering behind her, Max promising to give El her five bucks tomorrow. 

But Nancy tries to tune them out as her blood rushes to her ears. Like always, Robin looks fucking incredible. She’s wearing a band t-shirt that Nancy doesn’t recognize with the sleeves cut off, showing off her toned arms. The bottom of the shirt is also cut, right above the top of Robin’s black jeans. The sliver of her skin reminds Nancy of how she looked in her own clothes. Nancy’s gut swoops low, a burning hot sensation pooling at her lower back. 

Fuck, maybe she’s had too much to drink. 

But no, because she was fine before.

This was all Robin.

“Hey Wheeler, Max, El.” It’s almost like she’s transported back to that party nearly a month ago, Robin is sporting three red solo cups, handing them to the girls carefully. 

“Okay, we’re gonna go over there.” Max says as she points to nowhere in particular as her and El make their way from behind Nancy. 

Robin gives Nancy a weird look. Nancy meets her look with a smile. “Hi, Robs.”

“Hi, Nance.” Robin smirks. 

Nancy peers into the cup, wrinkling her nose at the smell of cheap vodka. “Wanna tell me what's in this?”

“Oh, just a special concoction I made for you.” 

Nancy tastes it, and it’s not as bad as she was expecting. “Okay, not bad Buckley.” She downs the cup, not forgetting her days drinking in high school. 

Robin grabs Nancy's free hand. Electric jolt. Calm. “let’s go get you another, maybe less strong this time.” and she’s guiding Nancy through the living room to the kitchen.

Steve and Eddie are there. “Nancy! S’good to see you.” Steve says as he hugs her, her hand still panted firmly in Robin’s. She glances at Eddie, who’s giving Robin a look she can’t decipher.

After greeting Eddie, Robin drags her over to the fridge. “How ‘bout a beer?” 

“Fine by me.” Nancy says as Robin takes it out, pulling out one for herself and for Nancy. Nancy watches as Robin places the top of the beer bottle in her mouth and cracks the cap off with her teeth. Nancy had to swallow back the urge to make out with her right then and there.

Christ, this was going to be a long night. 

Nancy takes a long sip from her beer, not taking her eyes off of Robin’s. Robin copies her movements, staring into Nancy’s eyes as her throat bobs up and down with the flow of the alcohol. 

“Let’s dance.” Nancy says as she reattaches their hands and pulls Robin through the massive crowd in the living room. 

It feels like the homecoming party, but this time she won’t have to worry about Jason. 

It feels like the date party, Robin and her watching each other as they dance, and this time maybe she does have to worry about Vickie. But she won’t, not right now.

Because right now, Robin’s free hand has unlatched itself from Nancy’s and is now gripping her waist. Nancy’s hand slides up Robin’s arm, stopping ever so slightly at her bicep, before wrapping it around the back of the taller girl’s neck. The music is blaring, strobe lights bouncing off the floor onto the walls, and Robin’s face is just mere inches from Nancy's. The lyrics of a song she knows plays louder in her head as Robin pulls her in closer. 

I can’t stop the way I feel

Things you do don’t seem real

Tell me what you’ve got in mind

‘Cause we’re running out of time

Won’t you ever set me free?

The waiting ‘rounds killing me

If the grip that Robin has on Nancy wasn’t enough, Robin’s eyes tracing a path from Nancy’s to her lips, back up to her eyes was enough to send Nancy’s heart plummeting from her chest. She can feel Robin’s breath on her as the rest of the room fades away. Nothing else matters, no one else matters, not when Robin is this close. 

Nancy’s eyes leave Robin’s to peer down at the red lips that have tainted her mind for months. They look almost wet in the low light, her jaw is set and looking impossibly sharp. What Nancy would give to be able to run her tongue down the length of Robin’s neck, to learn exactly what makes her tick. 

Robin hooks her finger in the beltloop of Nancy’s jeans, and presses the two girls flush against each other. Robin’s hips meet Nancy’s in blistering heat, pressing, pressing, pressing. Her grip is strong on Nancy. It’s full of want, aching desire, an unwillingness to let the moment slip by. 

She drives me crazy 

Like no one else 

She drives me crazy

And I can't help myself 

Nancy is drunk on Robin’s touch, wanting more, needing more. She didn’t think anyone could need something so much, until she met Robin. Nancy splays her hand against Robin’s neck, letting her nails drag slightly against the pale skin. Robin shudders against her touch, hips pressing further into Nancy’s. Nancy lightly tugs at the hair on the nape of her neck, and Robin lets out an honest to god whimper. The sound alone could make Nancy’s knees buckle, but when she looks up to find that Robin’s eyes have darkened and her face is pleading, Nancy grips the hair at the nape of her neck again. 

She pulls Robin in closer, letting their foreheads touch and noses bump. Robin’s nose traces against Nancy’s cheek as she lets her beer bottle drop to the ground. With her left hand grasping onto Nancy’s jeans, she lets her free hand rest along Nancy’s jaw. The heat radiating from her skin warms Nancy’s cheek as Robin slowly makes her way down to Nancy’s lips. It’s impossibly slow, the way their noses bump, the way Robin’s fingers are splayed on her jawline and neck, the way she’s moving down Nancy’s face as if she’s trying to memorize the feeling. 

Nancy’s breath hitches as Robin wets her lips, staring in the slight gap between them at Nancy’s own. Robin’s breath smells of peppermint and beer, a combination that would usually make Nancy wince, but at this moment she finds she doesn’t care. Robin’s slightly open mouth is just barely against Nancy’s as they share the same air, breathing each other in. Everything that Nancy has wanted is right in front of her. Pressing against her in every way: hip bones to hip bones, heaving chest to heaving chest, nose to cheek. 

The fire in Nancy’s chest is back, and knowing that Robin is feeling the same way spurs it on even more. 

Nancy makes one more movement at the nape of Robin’s neck, gripping her hair and bringing the taller girl's lips to hers. Robin hums into the kiss, vibrating Nancy’s insides. Her fingers dig deeper into Nancy’s jaw as Nancy's lips become pliant against Robin’s. Nancy sighs into the kiss, her heart beating like a drum inside of her chest. 

It feels like fireworks, her lips against Robin’s. Every single movement echoing yes, yes, yes. 

Nancy’s grip on the girl matches Robin’s grip on her; her nails are digging softly into the back of her neck, moving around to the front to trace her jaw. Robin stutters, gripping Nancy’s waist tighter, bringing them closer than they’ve ever been before. Nancy drops her beer bottle, not caring about it spilling to the floor. She wants more of Robin. She needs more of Robin. 

Nancy brings her now free hand up to Robin’s chest and rests it slightly above her breastbone, pushing her backward into the hallway, not once breaking the fervent kiss. Once they’re in the hallway, Robin regains control as she presses Nancy up against the wall. Her hips rock into Nancy’s as her fingers grip into the shorter girl’s hips. 

Robin kisses the way she talks. She’s so soft yet firm, her tongue dances between their lips, the way her tongue does when speaking a different language. She’s fast and she’s slow and it’s all so intoxicating to Nancy. Everything this girl does makes Nancy feel like her head is spinning. 

Robin detaches her lips from Nancy, which elicits a groan. But when her lips attach themselves to Nancy's neck, she can’t be too mad about it. 

Robin’s hands are tracing up and down Nancy’s torso, going up until the edge of her bra, back down to the spot right above her underwear at a tantalizing speed. Robin sucks on the spot right below Nancy’s ear, and Nancy’s back arches off the wall as her hands grip Robin’s soft hair, keeping her in that exact spot. Robin’s hips meet Nancy’s again, pushing her back against the wall. 

Robin’s long fingers stop their teasing and plant themselves right on the edge of her jeans in front of the button. Robin rasps out, “fuck, Nance. You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do this.” against her neck. Nancy’s hips buck once more at the girl’s words, and Robin bites down softly on the side of Nancy’s neck. Nancy lets out the most embarrassing noise imaginable as her hand grips Robin’s head tighter. 

Nancy can’t handle the feeling anymore. The feeling of warmth in her core, spreading down her thighs. Nancy mutters “upstairs.” and she feels Robin nod her head. When Robin looks up at her, hips still flush against each other, Nancy’s lipstick is smudged all over her lips. She has a half-lidded gaze and even in the low light Nancy can see that her pupils are dilated. 

Robin drags Nancy upstairs, still unable to keep her hands off of her. She’s touching her waist, her hips, her lower back, it’s everything Nancy ever wished for. 

And she’s never wanted anything more at this moment. 

The moment the door to Robin’s room latches shut, Nancy has her against the door in no time. She snakes her left hand up and under Robin’s shirt, skating her nails against Robin’s torso as she attaches her lips to Robin’s neck. She tastes like skin and pine and Robin. Nancy moans lowly into Robin’s neck as the other girl's hand cups Nancy’s clothed breast, using her finger to graze over her hardened nipple. 

Nancy takes this as an invitation. She uses the hand under Robin’s shirt to dip underneath the taller girl’s bra and squeeze the soft skin underneath. Robin’s breath shudders against Nancy as her hand grips tighter and tighter. 

Robin pushes herself off the door, taking Nancy's face into her hands, and placing an achingly slow kiss to her lips as she guides Nancy backwards toward the bed. The back of Nancy’s knees hit the bedframe, and the girls fall slowly onto the bed, Robin’s hands bracing their impact. 

Nancy scooches up to rest slightly on the bed frame, and Robin follows. Their kissing hasn’t stopped as Robin plants her thigh in between Nancy’s open legs. The pressure alone could make Nancy come undone. Robin presses incessantly, deepening the kiss as she reaches for the hem of Nancy’s thin long sleeve. Nancy raises her arms, allowing the girl to remove her top. Robin then removes her own in one swift motion, and Nancy thinks she may pass out. 

Robin is wearing a black sports bra that contrasts with Nancy’s pink lace. Nancy trails her hand down Robin’s chest and latches her fingers underneath the elastic. Nancy looks at Robin, waiting for some sort of approval. Robin nods, and just like that, Nancy is hiking her bra over her head. 

Robin looks fucking incredible with clothes on, but somehow she looks even better bare. Nancy’s lips attach to Robin’s right breast, sucking as she squeezes her finger over Robin’s left nipple. Robin lets out a moan that is music to Nancy’s ears, and she feels Robin’s hands on her back unclasping her bra. 

Nancy’s never wanted anything more. The pressure in her core building with every movement, every kiss. Robin’s thigh is planted back in between Nancy’s thighs as she towers over her. 

This is the hottest thing Nancy has ever seen in her life. 

Robin dips her head to focus on Nancy’s breasts, going between the two, sucking so hard there will probably be bruises. She plants kisses on the vast skin between them. Nancy squirms against Robin, her hips rocking against Robin’s clothed thigh. 

Nancy nearly breaks at the feeling as she continues the motion, rocking up and rocking down. She knows her underwear is going to be ruined, but she doesn't care. Robin notices the movement and removes her mouth from Nancy’s chest to watch. Her long fingers grip Nancy’s hipbones as she guides Nancy, up and down. 

Robin is looking at her, pupils blown and jaw dropped, as Nancy rocks herself on Robin. 

Nancy can’t take the feeling of it not being enough. She stops her movements and mutters “off” to Robin. Robin gets to work right away, undoing Nancy’s zipper and slipping her jeans off of her legs. Nancy knows that her underwear is soaked through, but Robin’s face as she realizes it is enough to send her reeling. 

“Jesus Christ Nance.” Robin runs her ginger up and down Nancy’s clothed center and Nancy twitches against the motion, a faint moan spilling from her lips. 

Nancy nods towards Robin’s lower half, “you too.” and jumps at the opportunity to strip Robin of her jeans. 

She’s wearing blue and grey boxers underneath.

As if she couldn’t get any hotter. 

Nancy reattaches their lips, pulling her back on top of her in a heated kiss. Robin’s naked thigh ghosting over Nancy’s underwear as Nancy dips her hand below the waistband of Robin’s boxers. Robin’s hips twitch as Nancy feels wet warmth, soaking her fingers already. 

“Fuck.” Nancy mutters against Robin’s lips as her thigh makes contact with Nancy again, and as she’s placing soft pressure on Robin’s core.

Nancy is rocking her hips into Robin, her breath shuddering every time the pressure is just right. She knows it won’t be long until she finishes, she just wants Robin to do the same. She’s wanted this too badly for too long, she knows it’s only a matter of time. And judging by Robin’s reaction, it won’t take long for her either. 

“Nancy, please.” Robin whines. The angle isn’t right, but Nancy’s pressure on the girl grows and her fingers work overtime against her clit. Robin is rasping out profanities in between niceties as she ruts against Nancy's hand. “Fuck, yes Nance, right there. God, you’re amazing. God, you’re fucking beautiful, baby.”

Robin calling her ‘baby’ spurs her on even more. Nancy’s hips are stuttering against Robin’s thigh as she finds herself closer to finishing just as Robin is tensing above Nancy’s hand. Nancy moans out “oh my god, Robin” as she comes against her thigh, her own thighs squeezing Robin’s and leaving her legs shaking. Robin finishes not too long after with a delicious moan, her legs shaking around Nancy’s hand. 

Robin drops down next to her, pressing her body up against Nancy’s. She’s tracing Nancy's face as she stares into her eyes, and Nancy is tracing Robin’s thigh. 

Robin looks properly fucked out. Her eyes are droopy, she’s got a permanent blush on her cheeks, and she’s taking long deep breaths. Nancy must look the same, because she certainly feels that way. 

Here she is, staring at the girl she’s falling in love with, laying next to her nearly naked as they both come down from their highs. How did she get so lucky?

“That was…” Nancy starts.

“Yeah.” Robin finishes with a huff. The two girls break into laughter as the realization sets in. 

They both just fucked the girl they hated for three years. And it was fucking great.

“Why weren’t we doing this the whole time?” Nancy laughs out. 

“Beats me.” Robin says, putting her hands up in surrender. She grabs Nancy’s chin to put them face to face. “I’ve wanted to do that since the moment I saw you, Wheeler.”

Nancy shoves Robin playfully. “No you did not, you hated me.” 

“I did not! And I even told you I wanted to do that once.”

Nancy’s jaw drops, “no you did not! I think I would have remembered that.”

Robin uses her elbows to sit up and face Nancy properly. “Remember that day in the library? The one where I told you things in different languages?” Nancy nods. “I told you I wanted to kiss you from the moment I saw you then, it was just in Latin.” Robin starts laughing at Nancy's shocked face.

“But, Robs, that was months ago.” Nancy almost can’t believe it. Has she been so oblivious this whole time?

“Yeah, and I meant it then. I meant it three years ago too, and I mean it now.” Robin looks shy and honest and soft and god, Nancy is so stupid. 

“I-I can’t believe it. I could have had you months ago?” Nancy says incredulously. 

Robin shrugs, “yeah, but you have me now.”

Nancy’s face breaks into a smile, “yeah, I guess I do.” she says as she pulls Robin in closer, letting the taller girl’s head rest on her chest. 

All this time, Robin has felt the same way. The question comes out of her mouth before she can stop it. “What else did you try to tell me in the library?” Nancy says as she cocks an eyebrow. 

She can feel Robin grinning against her chest, “that’s a conversation for tomorrow.” 

Robin traces Nancy’s stomach, and Nancy lets her hand stroke Robin’s hair. 

Tomorrow, Nancy thinks, they have tomorrow. 

She can’t help the smile on her face when she drifts off to sleep, and her dreams are filled with the beautiful girl sleeping soundly on her chest. 

Chapter Text

“So you FUCKED in her BED, slept over, and left without telling her you’re in love with her?” Max stares at Nancy as they all crowd on her bed, and she feels like she’s transported back to not even twenty-four hours ago. 

Nancy shrugs, “I don’t know, I mean…what if it was just a one night thing to her? That would be so mortifying.” 

“What if it wasn’t and you just left her there and ran back home?” El raises an eyebrow at Nancy.

Nancy’s jaw drops, “do you think she feels like I just ran out?”

Max and El share a look. “Well, did you?” Max asks.

Nancy narrows her eyes. “No, I woke her up and thanked her for last night…and then I left.” 

Max and El share another look as Nancy hides her face behind her hands. “Oh my god, she probably thinks that was a one time thing for me.” 

“Yeah, probably.” Sometimes how blunt Max can be is overwhelming, but this is what Nancy needs to hear. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. What should I do?”

“Go talk to her, Nance.” El wraps an arm around Nancy’s shoulder. “It’ll be okay, just be honest.”

“Fuck, okay yeah, I can be honest.” Nancy starts gearing herself up by hopping off the bed and pacing the floor. Just the thought of being honest to Robin has her palms sweating and heart pounding in her ears.

What if Robin doesn’t feel the same way? What if it’s all for nothing?

What if it works out?

Nancy needs to try, or she will regret it for the rest of her life.

She slips on her tennis shoes, not caring that she’s in sweatpants and a t-shirt, and runs down the stairs. She can hear echoes of cheering coming from her room.

She’s made this walk so many times by now, but this time feels different. This time, she’s going to give Robin her heart on a silver platter, and she prays Robin doesn’t give it right back to her.

This time, she knocks on the door, without the interruption of a certain red-head. Eddie is the one to answer it, giving her a knowing smile and telling her Robin is upstairs.

Going up each and every one of the wooden steps makes Nancy feel like she’s going to collapse, but when she catches the sight of light under Robin’s door, she’s surprisingly brave.

She gives it a few knocks, and at Robin’s ‘come in’ from her place on the bed, Nancy opens the door.

This is it. This is the moment that could crush Nancy's heart into a million pieces, or it could be the start of something new.

“Oh, hi Nance.” Robin chirps as she pats the spot next to her on her bed. The idea that Nancy was in here an hour ago feels absurd, like it happened in a different universe.

Nancy sits down, and the calm presence of the girl next to her tells her that everything will be okay. “Hi, Robs.”

“So, whatcha doin here?” Robin says inquisitively. 

“I…need to tell you something.” Nancy faces Robin, and Robin’s hands envelope hers in between them.

“Go on.” Robin is nodding, but the sad smile on her face is contradicting her words.

Nancy locks eyes with Robin, if she was going to do this, then she needed to do it right. She takes a deep breath in and out.

“I think, no, I know that there’s always been something about you that I couldn’t pinpoint. I couldn’t figure out why I hated you so much, why I let you always get under my skin, to the point where you consumed most of my waking thoughts for three years. You were so difficult, and I thought you were so full of yourself that I just couldn't stand it.”

“Okay, Nance, mind if you skip to the point?” Robin laughs out, though Nancy can see the fear in her eyes.
“Right, sorry. I guess what I was trying to say is- I was wrong. I was completely and utterly wrong about you and my world-view came crashing down that first day at the library. Don’t get me wrong, I still thought you were difficult.” Nancy can see Robin roll her eyes. 

“But, you were so smart, and so true to yourself in a way I’ve never seen, and it scared me. I felt like the more I got to know you, the more I’d hate you. But, actually, the opposite happened.” Robin has an unreadable expression on her face as she squeezes their hands tighter. Okay, this is it. She can do this.

“All those days in the library, the homecoming party, last night, confirmed one thing for me. I think I’m in love with you, Robin. No, actually, I know I’m in love with you.” The only sound in the room is Nancy’s heavy breathing. She thinks she could actually choke on the silence as she scans Robin’s face for any reaction.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. This is it. This is when Nancy's heart gets broken. If anyone were to break it, she’s almost glad it’s Robin.

Nancy feels the removal of Robin’s hands from her own and Robin catapults herself to lay flat on her back, breathing heavily, hand on her chest, staring at the ceiling.

“Jesus, Nance. Next time you profess your undying love for me please for the love of god get to the point faster. I thought I was having a heart attack.”

What? Robin wasn’t shooting her down? “What?” Nancy exasperatedly asks. She’s blinking her eyes as if she’s dreaming. 

“I thought you were going to tell me you didn’t want anything to do with me.” Robin’s looking up at Nancy from where she’s still laying. 

“And that was…giving you a heart attack?”

Robin gets up at that, and cradles Nancy’s face in her hands. “I’ve been in love with you for three years Nance, I’ve dreamt about you saying that exact thing to me every night since I saw you at that party.”

And, oh. 

Oh. 

“You…love me?” Nancy asks as Robin rolls her eyes.

“How could I not? I’m surprised you hadn’t picked up on it.” 

Nancy laughs, “what, with how nice to me you’ve been all this time.”

Robin gets closer to her, her breath tickling Nancy’s face. “To be fair, I was so in love with you I couldn’t see straight. My head was on backwards, and everything that came out of my mouth was in place of me telling you how I felt.” Robin kisses her then, soft lips meeting chapped ones, and everything falls into place. 

She got the girl. 

Robin breaks the kiss, peppering kisses across Nancy’s face. “I can’t believe it.”

Nancy smiles, echoing her soft words. “Neither can I.” 

—

Many hours, kisses, and giggles later, the girls are splayed out on Robin’s bed. Robin is tracing Nancy’s cheek as she looks into her eyes, and Nancy’s never felt so sure about anything in her life.

A thought occurs to her then. “Are you ever going to tell me the rest of what you said in the library?” 

Robin’s cheeks turn crimson and the smile on her face is enough to melt Nancy’s heart. Robin scooches closer and presses a kiss to Nancy’s cheek, her words ghosting over her skin. “Creo que eres hermosa,” another kiss pressed to her cheek, “I think you’re beautiful.” Nancy’s blush matches Robin’s hearing the girl speak so honestly, and in a different language at that. 

Robin kisses her other cheek as her eyes grow sad, “je sais que tu me détestes, j'aurais préféré que non,” Robin continues after pressing her lips into a thin line, “I know you hate me, I wish you didn’t.” Nancy cups Robin’s soft cheek into her own hand. She never wants Robin to feel that way ever again, and she’ll do everything in her power to make sure she never will.

Robin kisses her on the lips this time, “hai il mio cuore, you have my heart, Nancy Wheeler.” 

“And you have mine. You know, you really took a gamble on me not knowing what you were saying, what if I spoke Spanish or something?” Nancy laughs as Robin digs her head into the shorter girl’s chest.

Robin groans, “I was so nervous when I thought you knew French. I think I peed my pants a little.” 

“You did not.” Nancy laughs out as she hits Robin’s shoulder. 

Robin, still muffled by Nancy’s shirt, “okay, I didn't, but I for sure thought you were catching on.” 

“For your sake, I wasn’t. I was pretty much clueless until the morning.” Nancy shrugs.

Robin raises her head off of Nancy’s chest, “guess the truth was going to come out either way.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Nancy won’t resist the smile tugging on her lips as she stares down at Robin. 

Robin in her sweatpants, having not moved from her spot on Nancy’s chest in hours.

Robin and her freckled cheeks, red chapped lips, and soft sandy hair. 

Robin and her heart beating in sync with Nancy’s.

Finally, Nancy thinks, everything was worth it to get to this point.