Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

There was something about working on Friday afternoons that made the day seem to drag on needlessly, Jean Havoc decided.
The second lieutenant wasn't quite sure why this was.

It wasn't as though he had the weekend off.
He was always on call.

Nonetheless, as he peered out the office window at the bustling city of Central, he couldn't help feeling a bit exasperated that he was buried in paperwork on such a fine day.

He cleared his throat thoughtfully, absently taking a drag from his cigarette.


It really looked to be a beautiful day out.
The sun was shining, the weather seemed fair, and he could all too easily imagine what he would be doing were he not on duty.

He envisioned himself with Solaris, having a picnic just outside of the city…
A place where they'd be away from the city noise and be able to enjoy the pleasant sounds of nature.

Havoc sighed; he supposed he'd have to settle for a dinner date tonight.
On the bright side, his girlfriend was a real sweetheart.

She never seemed to mind how busy he was; she was just happy to be with him.
She was so… perfect.

Jean yawned, "Unlike here... The same rotating schedule day in and day out, investigations, then reports."

Not that he blamed the colonel for lighting a figurative fire under their rears.
He knew how badly his C.O. wanted to find Brigadier General Hughes's killer.
That meant gathering as much information from as many sources as possible.

He punctuated his thoughts with another yawn.
"Though he can be a bit of a slave driver sometimes." Havoc mused.

"Is there a problem, second lieutenant Havoc?" a cool voice addressed him from behind.

The blond jerked, turning to face his superior.
"Jeez... Talk about a case of 'speak of the devil, and he shall appear'."

Roy Mustang stood calmly with his arms folded over his chest.

He looked tired, but that was nothing new.
It was just one of the many subtle changes that had taken place in the colonel since Hughes's death.

"He looks about as tired as I feel." Havoc decided.

Roy arched an eyebrow, "Havoc?" he repeated his subordinate's name.

The second lieutenant cleared his throat.
"Sorry, you caught me off guard." He said sheepishly, "What're you up to, chief?"

"I just returned from a little research in the records department." Roy stated easily.
 "Then I walked by and noticed how fondly you seemed to be admiring the scenery."

"Hey, it's a nice day out." Havoc replied mildly, gesturing outside the window.

The colonel glanced past him, smirking slightly, "Yes, I suppose it is."

An awkward silence ensued and the second lieutenant wondered if his superior was preparing a choice lecture to chew him out.

He was probably asking for it, having been essentially daydreaming when he should have been working.
The rest of Team Mustang had just as much on their plates, after all.

He coughed in an effort to break the silence.


"Well, sir, I'll get back to work now if you don't need anything."
Maybe he could skirt the issue by showing some initiative.

Roy's smirk only widened, however.
"Havoc. Why don't you go check in on Falman?"

The second lieutenant blinked.
His shifts the past couple days had ended with paying visits to Falman at an abandoned apartment… where he was currently 'babysitting' Barry the Chopper.

 "Isn't it a little early for that, sir? I'm still on the clock."

Roy shrugged dismissively.
"You said yourself what a nice day it is. With as sick as poor Falman is, I'm sure a visitor would brighten his day. Wouldn't you agree?"

Havoc couldn't quite believe his ears.
The colonel was being surprisingly lenient, but he decided not to question it.

"Yes."
He cleared his throat.
 "Yes sir."

He put out what was left of his cigarette and offered a brief salute as he headed for the hallway.

"Oh, and second lieutenant?" Roy called after him.

Jean turned on his heel and peered back into the room, "Sir?"

"Make sure that Warrant Officer Falman knows that the moment he's well enough to resume active duty, there will be a mountain of paperwork awaiting him." Roy said, onyx eyes glinting in amusement.

Havoc smirked.
"Yes sir. I'll be back soon."

His footsteps faded down the hall, and he was gone.
The colonel shook his head to himself and headed for his office.

While he'd allowed Havoc the luxury of a change of scenery, he really had to be getting back to work.

Roy noticed movement out of the corner of his eye as Lieutenant Hawkeye fell into stride behind him.

"Lieutenant." He greeted easily.

"Lieutenant Havoc seemed in a hurry to leave." She remarked simply as they walked.

"I can't have him going stir-crazy, lieutenant." Roy said easily.
 "I sent him to check in on Falman."

"I see, sir." Riza nodded.

"Lieutenant. Haven't you noticed the second lieutenant seems to have become more anxious lately?" the colonel inquired, lowering his tone slightly.

"I'm not surprised, sir." Hawkeye deadpanned.
"He has managed to find himself a girlfriend as of late."

"Is that right?" Roy offered a mild chuckle.
 "It's a wonder he hasn't been spreading word all over the office about her." He mused.

"With all due respect, sir, I believe he's afraid of losing her to a certain suave superior." Riza said easily.

The colonel paused and glanced back at her in mild agitation.
 "Come on, lieutenant. Give me some credit; I'm not that bad." He argued coolly.

Riza offered an unconvinced shrug but said no more.

Meanwhile, Havoc was making his way discreetly towards the apartment in which Falman was holed up.
Glancing over his shoulder briefly, Havoc ducked down an alleyway to throw any potential 'trackers' off his trail.

He'd stopped by a street vendor along the way to purchase a basket of fruit and a newspaper.
Nourishment aside, he seemed to recall Falman referring to the newspaper as his only form of entertainment.

"But being locked in with a serial killer? I don't think I'd be bored in his shoes." The second lieutenant mused, knocking carefully at the door.

"Y-yes?" Falman responded quietly from the other side.

"It's me, Lieutenant Havoc."
Havoc cleared his throat loudly.
 "I came to see how you're doing."

Falman seemed to accept that as identification, as he unlocked the door and let Jean inside.

"Hey! The cigarette guy again!" Barry greeted with a mild wave of his armored hand.
"How's life in the real world?"

"It's a pretty nice day out, actually." Havoc reported as he passed the basket of fruit to Falman.

"That's too bad. The sexiest ladies come out on beautiful days." Barry sighed.
"And my knife could really use a fresh coat of red."

Falman rubbed his temples, setting the basket on a small table.
 "What part of lying low don't you comprehend? The colonel will have me discharged if I let you roam free!"

"Or worse." Havoc offered thoughtfully.

"Relax, Falman. I don't want to upset the lady lieutenant, so I'll stay put for now." Barry said simply.

"How generous of you." The warrant officer deadpanned.
Spending day in and out with the serial killer was more than bit exasperating.

Havoc, noting the warrant officer's frustration, extended the newspaper towards him calmly. "Here."

"Thanks." Falman sighed, leafing through the articles briefly.

Both Barry and Havoc graciously spared him a moment of silence.

Jean glanced around the rundown room.

There were cracks in the walls, the floorboards were old, and almost everything was coated in a fine layer of dust and dirt.
That was, save for the few objects that had recently been moved and/or touched.

The filth wasn't unbearable, he decided, but it wasn't very attractive either.

Attractive. 

Now, that word made him think of Solaris.
In the short time he'd known her, she always dressed so elegantly.
Her dark hair cascaded down her shoulders, long and wavy…

A sudden yawn caught him off guard and the second lieutenant blinked back small pinpricks of tears.

"Tired?" Falman asked, making more of an observation than an actual query.

"A little." Havoc admitted, another yawn seemingly punctuating the thought.

Barry glanced over with the faintest of interest.
"That's one of the advantages of having a body like mine. Never tired, never hungry, and I have all the time in the world to chop people up!"

One could almost see a maddening grin spreading in the serial killer's eyes.

"Right…" Havoc replied uncertainly and glanced to Falman.
"By the way, before I head on out of here, the colonel wanted me to remind you- when you get back from 'sick leave', be prepared for a ton of paperwork." He said, heading for the door.

Falman sighed.
"I see. Tell him I understand and will dutifully complete all my assignments."

Havoc nodded and glanced over the room once more.
"Try not to go too crazy, you two." He said blithely as he let himself out.

The lieutenant shuffled along the city streets languidly as he headed back towards Central command.

He'd figured the fresh air would wake him up, but the little excursion had done little to lessen his fatigue.
Perhaps Fridays really were just that exhausting… or else his subconscious was so eager for his date that it was content to blur through the rest of the time in between.

Or maybe…

His hand vaguely migrated towards his throat as he cleared it for what felt like the thousandth time that day.

"Maybe it's all the darn pollen in the air." Havoc mused to himself.

The idea somehow struck him as funny, and he shook his head in amusement.
How could he, a tried-and-true country boy, who had never had so much as a touch of hay fever, be affected by a little bit of pollen?

"Then again," the lieutenant considered as he swallowed against the awkward itch in his throat.
"I suppose there's a first time for everything."

At length, Havoc made his way back to the command center… and his unfinished paperwork.
The half-filled sheets seemed to stare at him mockingly, promising to chew up another few hours of his time at the very least.

With a sigh of discontent, the second lieutenant sat down, lit a cigarette, and resolved that today's shift couldn't end soon enough.

Three excruciatingly long hours later, he was free to go.

Havoc sighed in relief.
He was beat.

Not only had he managed to forget to report to Mustang the moment he returned, but when the colonel had come to inquire about Falman, he'd very nearly let slip a certain serial killer's name.

He ran a hand slowly through his blond locks.

 "Ah well, it could have been worse." He decided.
 "And besides… now I can unwind while having dinner with my sweet Solaris." 

A tired smirk crept across his mouth.
Yes. That was definitely going to be the highlight of his day.

They had agreed to meet at Genevieve's Garden, one of the pricier restaurants in town.

Jean supposed the place's price tag was primarily based on its convenient location and classy outdoor seating arrangements.
The service might have been a factor as well, but in his mind the food was average at best.

He preferred a home-cooked meal, if he was honest with himself.
However, he was all too happy to lighten his wallet if it meant seeing that beautiful smile cross Solaris's lips.

Presently, Havoc scanned the sea of well dressed patrons for said woman.
He hoped she hadn't given up on waiting for him.

He wasn't all that much later than usual, was he?

"Jean?"

He paused. 
There it was.

Her melodic voice seemed to soothe a fraction of the day's stress with the single word.

She touched his shoulder gently from behind, running her gloved fingers delicately down the length of his arm.
 "Sorry, Jean," she purred, "I'm running a little late. You haven't been waiting long, have you?"

Havoc turned to face her, feeling undeniably relieved.
"No… actually," he cleared his throat.
"I just got here myself." He admitted sheepishly.

"Oh, good," Solaris smiled warmly.
 "Then let's get a table together."

Chapter Text

Havoc scarcely paid attention as a waiter led them to a street-side table.
He supposed he had been content as a spectator to Solaris's expressions.

The way she smiled courteously at their server…
How that same lipstick smile looked just a bit mischievous as she ordered a glass of red wine with her salad…

What pulled him back to reality was the realization that something was expected of him.
He too had to order something.

"Sir, can I help you?" the waiter asked impatiently.

"Ah… right! Sorry, I'll have the twelve ounce beef sirloin." The lieutenant blurted.
They served those here, didn't they?

"Very good, sir. And how would you like that cooked?" the waiter drawled.


“Yeah. Not raw.”

The waiter rolled his eyes slightly and waited for the real answer.
It never came.

The man flicked his gaze to Solaris, who looked equally puzzled.
He glanced back at Havoc who was no longer paying him any mind and sighed.
He did not get paid enough for this…

The waiter cleared his throat loudly, giving the lieutenant a start.
“Your steak, sir. How would you like it?” he tried to keep his tone pleasant.


Havoc realized his mistake and colored slightly.
“Oh… sorry.” He said vaguely, “Uh… medium well.”


The waiter nodded, “And to drink?”


Jean rubbed absently at the base of his neck.
 "Water?" he asked hopefully.

Whatever had been bothering his throat that day made him question his tolerance for anything heavier.

The server nodded and disappeared somewhere out of Havoc's left peripheral.
It wasn't as though he didn't know where the man was most probably going; it was that he simply didn't care.

Solaris wasn't smiling any more.

It dawned on the lieutenant that his hand was still resting at his throat and he reluctantly drew it back, feeling mildly self-conscious.

"Is everything alright, Jean?" Solaris inquired, voice soft and laced with concern.

"Damn. Did I really make her worry that much?" the lieutenant wondered.
The notion both touched and ashamed him simultaneously.

"I'm fine, don't you worry," Havoc grinned, voice a little rougher than he would have liked.
He cleared his throat and continued purposefully.
"It's just been a long day."

"Well, if you'd like to talk about it… I'm all ears."
Solaris gave his hand an affectionate squeeze.

"She's just the sweetest thing I've ever seen!" Havoc sighed contentedly.

He'd never figure out exactly what stars had aligned to bring her into his life.

"Nah, it's alright." He smiled.
"I wouldn't want to bore you."

"Alright, but if you change your mind…" Solaris trailed off, knowing full well he got the gist.
 Her magenta eyes reflected hints of concern as she studied him, masking the true malice behind them.

The embodiment of lust sighed inwardly. She'd thought she'd struck gold when she'd managed to earn the affections of one of Mustang's men.
However, with each passing day, she became increasingly dumbfounded with how simple and yet surprisingly tight-lipped he was.

And yet, she endured his idiotic blathering in hopes of finding some useful nugget of information.

Still though, today she found herself considerably less annoyed by her would-be informant.
She may not have had Wrath's ultimate eye, but her perceptive skills were nonetheless considerably acute.

As she studied the lieutenant through the guise of Solaris, she picked up on the subtle things he didn't say.

From the obvious fatigue lining his face, to the way his shoulders sagged just a little too lax…
Perhaps if those were all, she would have passed him off as an overworked soldier.

However, the way his eyes appeared glossy and bloodshot… the fashion in which his hand seemed eager to migrate towards his throat, and the way his voice strained when he spoke…she was able to draw her own conclusions.

"It looks like the fool's coming down with something." Lust mused to herself.
"Humans really are such weak creatures."

She smiled sweetly as the waiter brought their food to the table.
"Oh, Jean, doesn't it look wonderful?" Solaris gushed.

Havoc offered her a tired smile in turn.
"Yeah, and I bet it tastes great, too."

She took a sip of her wine, grin only spreading wider across her crimson lips.
Humans were so easy to manipulate.

"Yes. This golden opportunity does indeed taste wonderful." She thought jovially.
She was sure Father would be pleased, for the plan she had in mind was nothing short of merciless.

Havoc, unaware that his 'beautiful Solaris' was seemingly plotting his untimely demise, simply smiled.
He was tired, his head ached, and his throat itched, but if Solaris was happy, then he was too.

Lust studied the second lieutenant from across the table.
She couldn't help but think how ridiculous humans were.
They offered free and unprompted amusement at nearly every turn.

Jean Havoc didn't seem the type of man to waste an expensive dinner, and yet he'd hardly touched his steak.
The previously steaming cut of meat had grown lukewarm… and what excuse had he offered?

"Just had a big lunch, you know?" He had said with a sheepish grin.

"What a weak and obvious lie." Lust decided with a shake of her head.

She knew for a fact that Mustang was working his men ragged in pursuit of Hughes's killer.
Even if he'd had the time for such a big meal as he claimed, it hardly seemed practical to bloat oneself with such an active schedule.

Havoc stared back at Solaris, feeling a little guilty for having lied to her.
The truth was that his dinner wasn't quite agreeing with him.

It wasn't as though it was upsetting his stomach.
In fact, the reality of the situation was far from it.

Rather, the disagreeable part was the journey towards his digestive system- namely, swallowing.
The bizarre itch in his throat had quickly taken a turn for the worse.
Each bit of meat felt like an individual shard piercing his gullet as it dragged its way down.

He sipped at his water uneasily, trying his best not to grimace.

"Jean… is your throat bothering you?" Solaris asked softly.

"O-Only," His voice cracked, and he tried desperately to clear his throat.
 All he succeeded in doing was making himself cough.

"Only a little bit." He lied.
"Damn. Maybe I am allergic to something."

"I see." Solaris smiled sympathetically.
"No doubt a byproduct of your long day. You should try and get a good night's rest."

"No need to worry about that, Solaris." Havoc said, attempting to sound casual.
"With the shifts I've been on, I'm usually out before my head hits the pillow."

"You poor man." Her voice cooed in feigned sympathy.
Lust held back a grin.
"Such a poor, pitiful fool."

"It's fine." The second lieutenant waved it off, pausing slightly as he attempted to hold in a yawn.

His jaw seemed to fidget slightly as his eyes grew glossier.

"Anyway." He said at length.
 "How's your day been?"

A gentle smile played at her lips.
"And he's changed the subject. How incredibly predictable."

"Oh, I had a nice day. I did a bit of light reading this morning and then went shopping around the city. There's actually a pretty little number in the dress shop window that I'm particularly fond of, but it's terribly overpriced." Solaris heaved a sigh.
"It's too bad; it really is a beautiful gown."

Havoc felt his cheeks warm slightly, setting a hand contentedly under his chin as he listened.
Perhaps if he didn't quite feel so tired, and his throat wasn't quite so irate, he'd have offered to buy her said dress.

Right now, however, he was content to simply listen as she gushed over the dress she couldn't afford.
In fact, if she were to continue on about it for another hour, he was fairly convinced he wouldn't have minded.

Lust, alternatively, was incredibly pleased when the waiter came by with their bill.
It gave her the excuse to draw the evening to a close, and to report back both her findings and her plans to Father.

All she had to do was promise the fool a time and a place the following day, and she was free to go.

Her retreat was made easier by the lieutenant himself, who instead of insisting on walking her safely across the main business street, had simply bid her goodnight and left.

She supposed he really was dead on his feet.
This, of course, meant less hassle for her, ultimately.

She smirked.

Humans really were such silly, amusing creatures.

Slipping down side roads and dimly lit alleyways, the homunculus disappeared into the night.
She wasn't about to keep her father waiting any longer.

Deep beneath Central, a bearded man clad in white robes sat in wait.
He had been called many things over his lifetime, but to his homunculi, his children, he was simply 'Father'.

He leafed calmly through a thick alchemic volume, knowing full well that his lasciviousness was well on her way to see him.

The other homunculi were a bit spread out at the moment, to both their father's satisfaction and mild displeasure.

He'd sent Wrath off to trail the Elric brothers in the south.
It wasn't as though the boys' travelling in and of itself was troublesome, only that the elusive Greed liked to linger just outside of view.

Father couldn't risk the avaricious homunculi somehow interfering with his human sacrifices.
He had to ensure their safety.

Then there was Pride. His eldest son had perhaps been given the most to juggle.
Not only did he expect Pride to keep track of, and give instruction to Sloth, but he also charged him with maintaining his innocent façade in the presidential family.

The only three capable of gathering before him for an audience that night were the three remaining cardinal sins.

That was to say, Father was awaiting the assembly of Envy, Gluttony, and Lust--
Two of which had long since arrived.

"What's taking that old hag so long?" The more slender of the two, Envy, lamented.

"You have no idea how dangerous it can be out there late at night for a poor, defenseless woman like me." A voice, steeped in sarcasm, floated from the shadows.

And there was the third.

"Lust!" Gluttony exclaimed, throwing his hefty arms in the air with excitement.

"Gluttony, how many times have I told you? Wait for me at your vantage point. You can't keep wandering off like this every time I pay a visit to the lieutenant." Lust said with a mild roll of her eyes.

"Sorry." The blob of a homunculus apologized, his tone childish in its simplicity.
"I got hungry, so I came back here to get some food to eat."

"What's the matter, Lust? Can't babysit and work your boyfriend at the same time?" Envy taunted.

Lust pointedly ignored him, tossing her wavy locks over her shoulder seductively.

"I believe I'm really starting to make a breakthrough with that fool. Unique circumstances have provided me with an interesting opportunity." She spoke, walking briskly towards her father's throne.

"What about the circumstances that make them so unique, Lust?" Father inquired, shutting the tome from whence he'd been perusing.

"I'm so glad you asked, Father." Lust said with a slight bow.
"Lieutenant Havoc happens to be coming down with a cold from what I've gathered. He's bound to be out of sorts, which no doubt will loose his tongue. With your permission, Father, I'd like to take some invasive action."

"Meaning?" Father clarified, stone-faced.

"In observation of the humans, one thing is clear throughout history when it comes to the sick man. Show him compassion and care, and he's liable to spout just about anything with little prompting." Lust mused.

"So basically, you want to pretend to nurse him back to health while you wait for him to blurt things out? That's pathetic." Envy vociferated.

"Is it?" Lust challenged mildly.
"I could get myself invited back to his place and scour his belongings for any helpful leads while he was asleep. Namely, I have nothing to lose, but a significant amount to gain if all goes well. What's more, unlike the fuss at the fifth laboratory, no one would bat an eye. If anything, the poor lieutenant would be blamed if he lost any valuable information in his possession."

Father listened silently as his jealousy and lasciviousness bickered.
In some ways, they really did behave like siblings.

Envy crossed his arms.
"What makes you think the colonel is going to give your boyfriend sick leave, anyway? He doesn't seem willing to let even something as simple as the need for sleep get in the way of his pursuit of the Hughes case. Why would he let one of his subordinates off for something as simple as a head cold?"

"You've got it backwards," Lust replied pointedly.
"It's because of the fact he's in such dogged pursuit of Hughes's killer that he'll give the lieutenant a bit of leave."
She offered a simple shrug, “He wants all of his men focused. I assume he'd sooner sacrifice a day, than have their performance be subpar."

"That's banking a lot on you understanding the colonel's mindset." Envy grumbled.

"As I said, there's really nothing to be lost here." Lust said smoothly.
She glanced back to the bearded man, "Well, Father, do my plans suit your tastes?"

"Do with your informant as you see fit, Lust. Your father only wishes to see results. He does not care by which methods you attain them. That is, so long as you follow his guidelines." His voice echoed calmly; his gaze one of a bored pacifism.

"Understood." Lust nodded complacently.
"You are most generous, Father."

Chapter Text

Jean Havoc stumbled into his apartment, unit number 87 in the military owned residential district.

Kicking off his boots by the door, the second lieutenant found that he was too tired to reflect on whether or not that evening's date had been successful.
While the promise of another one tomorrow seemed to indicate that it had been, he couldn't be bothered to think about it too deeply.

Groggily, he changed out of his uniform and then fairly melted into his mattress.
He sighed deeply as he sprawled out.

At long last, he could relax and get some shuteye.

"Just a good night's sleep," he thought, still dimly awake.
 "After that, I'll be all good to go."

…And perhaps he would have been, were it not for the disagreeable feeling welling in his chest.

He let loose a series hacking coughs, sputtering as he blinked sleepily.
It happened again. And again.

Was he just lying in a weird position?
He rolled over, hoping that would fix things.

It seemed his airways weren't fond of that position either.
Every breath seemed to taunt his lungs, and they were all too easily suckered in by the bait.

The sound of his own coughing echoed loudly in his ears as the force of the expulsions set fire to his tender throat.

As the fit passed, the lieutenant emitted a strangled groan.
Despite his body's sudden rejection of air, he was honestly surprised he wasn't asleep yet.

He sure was tired enough to sleep.

However, rather than finding rest, Havoc discovered he was having a terrible time of it getting comfortable.

Every inhale sent the most abhorrent tickling sensation through his throat and chest where it sat as a persistent weight until coughing temporarily expelled it.
That in and of itself was annoying.

However, to Havoc’s horror, the longer it persisted, the more the rest of his body seemed eager to work against him.

He was too hot; then he was too cold.

Lying on his back felt too stiff and made breathing even harder.
Propping himself up seemed to add pressure to his sinuses and invite more coughing still.

Turning his head to the side inexplicably made his jaw pinch sharply in a way that made him feel like the lower half might just unhinge like a snake’s.

Then, amidst his tossing and turning, he would find a spot that seemed just right.
 But of course, his temporary euphoria was lost rather abruptly by the rebellion his lungs seemed to be staging.

"Damn it all." The lieutenant sighed, dragging himself into a sitting position.

He didn't suppose this night could get any more frustrating.
Despite a deep sense of fatigue, he was beginning to feel more alert now than when he'd walked through the door!

 He just wanted to sleep, for crying out loud!

All Havoc desired was to feel rested enough to endure the whole vicious cycle again tomorrow.

Was that too much for him to hope for?!

His frustration evaporated all in an instant as a new emotion took hold.
It wasn't fear or rage, but surprise that had taken over the lieutenant.

A fiery itching in his throat was working its way up into his nasal passages at an alarming rate. T
he sensation shot through him in bursts, like an inner fireworks display.

Then, all at once came the grand finale.

Jean pitched forward with the sneeze.
"Ehhk'CHAAA!"

He cringed slightly.
"Well, if my throat wasn't sore before, it sure as hell is now." he mused, feeling just a bit sardonic.

He flopped back down against the mattress with a soft sigh.

Perhaps he hadn't developed an allergy after all.
However, the alternative wasn't exactly enthralling.

"I'm too tired to deal with this right now." Havoc lamented inwardly.
"Then again," he decided grimly, "I suppose that comes with the territory, being a soldier and all."

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had to deal with something and there wasn’t at least a tired buzzing in the back of his brain.
This, though, felt somehow more substantial.

He heaved yet another sigh, resigning himself to the fact that he was in for a long night.

The darkness of night seemed to stretch on with tediously slow speed…and yet morning -somehow- managed to still arrive too early.

To be honest, Jean wasn't even sure how he managed to get dressed that morning, let alone make it to Central command on time.

His head felt heavy, and his eyeballs ached in their sockets.
He wished forlornly that he could go back to just feeling incredibly tired.

His throat had become so horribly raw that his desire to smoke had been all but snuffed out for the time being.

He’d tried when he got up, hoping to give himself some pep.
The subsequent coughing fit, though, had been so brutal he’d worried his lungs were somehow going to force themselves up his throat.

He’d had no choice but to snuff that one out and call it a loss.

 Out of habit, the second lieutenant had since placed a fresh cigarette between his teeth, but hadn't been able to bring himself to light it.
He was sure later he’d get desperate enough for a smoke not to care, but right now he felt just rotten enough that he really didn’t want to cough any more than he had to.

Presently, Havoc found himself standing in front of the double doors that led into Mustang's office, frowning.

 He had to make himself as presentable as possible, he decided.
He allowed himself a quiet sniffle, dabbing at his leaky nose gently with a handkerchief.

Regrettably, all of the cold medicine he'd had at home was manufactured to be more of a nighttime formula.

That was, the delightful little drugs that might have soothed his current suffering were all known to cause drowsiness.
And so, in favor of actually getting work done, Havoc had elected to leave them be.

After all, the colonel was already running one man short due to Falman's assignment.
He needed as much help as he could get his hands on, and the second lieutenant had no intention of letting his superior down.

"KEH-Heh-Hrrrrm!" Havoc cleared his throat loudly, hoping to keep the hoarseness from his voice.

The colonel didn't need to know his predicament.
He had his own problems to deal with.

Squaring his shoulders, he knocked his fist lightly against one wooden door.

"Yes?" Roy inquired calmly, voice carrying from where he sat behind his desk.

"Lieutenant Havoc, reporting in, sir."
He focused on keeping his tone from cracking too badly.
"I have a few… inquiries as to today's assignments."

"Show him in, lieutenant." He could hear Roy say easily.

"Yes sir." Came Lieutenant Hawkeye's immediate reply.

The colonel was likely busy with his paperwork, judging from what he could hear.
Riza's footsteps echoed across the polished floor as she took a few quick strides towards the doors.

Havoc attempted to put on his best blasé expression within the short span of his wait.

The doors pulled inward, and all at once the second lieutenant found himself face to face with one Riza Hawkeye.

The caramel eyed sharpshooter stepped aside calmly to let him into the room.
She offered him a brief, courteous smile.
"Good morning, Lieutenant Havoc."

"Yeah, you too." He returned her grin.

With a simple nod, Riza closed the door after him.

The second lieutenant looked exhausted, she noted.
Whether it was from a late night out with his girlfriend, or something of a different nature, she didn't know.

Either way, it seemed worth bearing in mind.

Havoc plodded over to his superior's desk, craning his neck slightly to see what the colonel was working on.

Roy seemed completely absorbed by the document in front of him.
His hand moved in swift strokes as he guided a pen over the parchment.

Not wanting to distract him, Jean stood at attention, waiting for the colonel to finish scrawling his signature across the page.

His patience did not go unrewarded for long.
The colonel laid down his pen and laced his fingers together neatly as he regarded his subordinate.

 "So," Roy spoke calmly.
 "I'm all ears, lieutenant."

Havoc blinked.
"I… ehmm… I was wondering if there's a particular sector in which you'd like me to begin investigations toda- haaay."
He seemed to squint slightly, nose twitching almost imperceptibly.

Roy arched an eyebrow but permitted his subordinate to continue.

"I've already done some digging at B and D blocks, that incl-uuuuudes laboratories t-two and thr-heh- ehhhh!"
The second lieutenant's breaths became rapid and irregular, eyes watering.

"Havoc?" The colonel questioned, seeming somewhere between mildly concerned and amused as his subordinate struggled against the sneeze.

"Ehkt'ChAAaa! Ehhk'Chaa!"
The second lieutenant succumbed to a swift double, smashing his face into his uniform sleeve.
For a few short-lived moments, his carefree mask had slipped, and he just looked… tired.

"Gesundheit." Roy seemed to smirk.

"Th-thadk you, sir." Havoc qualified with an unhelpful sniff.
He did his best to straighten his stance once more, hoping to pass the miniature fit off as coincidence.

It seemed to be enough to fool the colonel for the moment, he decided, as the man began spouting orders without skipping a beat.

"Alright. See what you can scrounge up in the C block today. There have been a couple reports of strange activity in the area. They're probably nothing, but I'd rather rule out the possibility than not. I'll have you revisit B and D blocks within a few days' time to make sure nothing has changed."

"Yes sir." Havoc found himself responding automatically.
He felt his low reserves of energy draining as he merely thought about his task.

Riza scowled slightly, though it seemed to be directed at the colonel rather than the second lieutenant.
Surely Roy wasn't so oblivious that he was completely unaware of how uncomfortable the Havoc was.

While her observation skills were incredibly renowned, she knew the colonel himself was no slouch.

Didn't he notice the way Havoc's grin was a bit too forced?
…Or the exhaustion in his typically bright eyes?

Surely the rasp to his tone wasn't something only she heard.

Even if these subtle hints were lost on the colonel, she was positive he could see the most obvious clue.
Untidiness seemed to be a running theme in both Jean's hair and uniform, and she quite frankly doubted that it was pure happenstance.

And yet with all this evidence, that stubborn man was still going to work his subordinate ragged with his ‘If I don’t get a rest, you don’t’ mentality.

Riza would be the first to acknowledge the higher ups couldn’t care less about a head cold.
If work needed done, it was to get done.

But the work the colonel was asking Havoc to do was simply not that pressing.
He would have him miserable chasing the possibility of a crumb of information.
Put simply, it was a bit infuriating.

Havoc cleared his throat again, endeavoring to hold back a cough.
"W-Will that be everything then… colonel?"
He swallowed thickly, grimacing for the briefest of moments.

Roy seemed to consider the question.

"Colonel." Lieutenant Hawkeye cut in tonelessly.

Roy met her stormy gaze, watching her eyes flick between him and his cigarette-loving subordinate.
He read her message loud and clear, and yet he feigned ignorance.

 "Yes, lieutenant?"

She refused to acknowledge the pointless question, simply inclining her head towards the second lieutenant.

Despite what Hawkeye might have thought, Roy did notice that something was amiss.
Though to be fair, Havoc had chosen to show up to work today, so he couldn't be feeling all that bad.

Right?

He supposed it was never the brightest idea to make assumptions.
He had seen the momentary lapse in Havoc's features.

The change, however brief, had been a dramatic shift.
That in and of itself seemed enough to warrant a bit of concern.

Roy sighed. "Hey, Havoc."

The second lieutenant had a distinctly preoccupied look in his eyes as he met his superior's gaze.
 "Yes… Colonel?"

"Falman wasn't contagious by any chance, was he?" Roy inquired remotely.

Havoc, caught off guard, let loose a meek cough.
 "Sir?"

What was the colonel driving at?
He wondered.

"You look a little pale." Roy stated bluntly.
"Are you sure you should even be here?"

Havoc inhaled sharply, inadvertently launching himself into a round of coughing.

 "W-What makes you say that, chief? I feel fine, I swear!"
He plastered on a needlessly large grin.

His country boy charm, while endearing, wasn't quite enough to make the hurried statement seem even vaguely true.

Even he knew this.
And yet, he still found himself hoping that by some miraculous stroke of luck the colonel would accept it.

Roy Mustang was clearly unimpressed.
"Don't be an idiot, Havoc." He chastised pointedly.

"What?"

The look on Havoc's face was utterly dejected.
Of all the responses he'd expected, he certainly hadn't predicted one so callous in tone.

"How, exactly, do you plan on going about your day like this? Don't tell me you're planning to infect the whole department."

"Whaa… But you just-"

"I know what I said." Roy cut in.
"Though you're not exactly being honest with me, are you?"

"I…" Havoc trailed off, hanging his head in shame.
"No sir."

The colonel sighed pragmatically.
"I don't see why you feel the need for theatrics. You do realize I won't bite your head off if you ask for a single day of sick leave, right?"

His coal black eyes bore holes into the lieutenant.

"B-But sir… I…" Havoc's breathing hitched and his features crumpled abruptly.
"EHHHHH…Ehhk'ChAAaa! EHHHhhhh… Heh… EHHKT'Chaa!"

"I need you to be thorough, Lieutenant Havoc." Roy continued.
"I'm not sure I'm willing to risk potential slip ups on your part, just because you're feeling particularly stubborn today."

All argument seemed to have gone out of the second lieutenant.
"Understood, sir." He murmured soberly.

"Excellent." The colonel replied candidly.
"Now, go do us all a favor and get some sleep, alright?"

He couldn't have the man wandering around with his head full of cotton, after all.

"And please, feel better soon." Riza felt the need to include.
The colonel’s reprimand had been distinctly hypocritical, but at least he was showing some mercy.
She couldn’t complain.

Havoc sighed.
It seemed that he didn't have much choice.

"Yeah… okay." He said slowly.
"B-But I'll get back to work… first thing tomorrow morning." He promised.

"I wouldn't expect anything less." Roy returned calmly, turning his gaze back to his paperwork as the second lieutenant ambled out.

Chapter Text

Weighed down by defeat, Havoc trudged up the main hallway.

He felt positively awful- in more ways than one.

Gone were his chances of turning this into a productive day.
He couldn't help but feel he was letting the colonel down.
Sure, the man had more or less ordered him to leave, but prior to that he'd seemed rather hopeful for new results.

Of course he was.
Any morsel of information might end up putting him one step closer to finding Hughes's murderer.

The second lieutenant sniffled wearily.
"Guess I'm being pretty useless on that front today." He murmured to himself, catching a cough with his shoulder.

"Hey… Havoc. You're looking pretty down. Don't tell me the colonel stole your girlfriend again."

The blond blinked, and glanced up, recognizing the voice immediately.
He tried to summon up a wide smirk, but the stocky second lieutenant was already closing in.
He supposed he shouldn't try to fool his best friend anyhow.

Breda clasped a hand on his friend's shoulder.
"Is everything alright?"

"Not really." Havoc decided after a moment, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly.
"I'm exhausted. On top of that, the colonel more or less ordered me out of his office."

"You have my sympathies," Breda scratched his chin thoughtfully.
"Colonel Mustang has been a rather testy lately. It's understandable, really, but it's unlikely that it has anything to do with you personally."

Havoc couldn't help but smile faintly at this.
"Thanks for the enc-couragement, buuuut th-thaaat's n-n- ehhhhh…"

His breath came in uneven gasps as his nostrils twitched violently.
Apparently, his nose would rather demonstrate than allow him to explain.

"EHHhh… EHHKT'Chaa! Ehkt'ChAAaa!"
Jean sneezed loudly despite the sound being slightly muffled by his uniform sleeve.

Breda arched an eyebrow, "Gesundheit."

"Ughh…Dod't you give be that look." Havoc warned, trying his best not to sniffle.
"I would have taked sub cold bedicide this bordi’g, but I deeded to be able to thidk clearly."

Breda shook his head as if in faint amusement.
"If you really have to make the choice between being bodily or cognitively miserable, you probably should have just called in."

"Shuddup." Havoc grumbled as he fished around in his pocket for his handkerchief.
"It's bad edough the colonel was od by case about it, I dod't deed ady flack frub you."

He blew his nose quietly, seeking relief whilst still attempting to maintain some decorum.

"So, you're heading home then?" Breda inquired after a moment, tone significantly more serious.

"Yeah." Havoc sighed.
"I really hope I can sleep."

"The cold medicine should help. If not, you might consider taking a hot shower." Breda advised pointedly.

"Maybe." Jean muttered in acknowledgement, turning away to cough.

"Get better soon, alright?" Breda bid him farewell.
"I've got work to do."

Havoc watched his friend's retreating back as he disappeared down the hall.
He sighed and continued on his way.

Stepping outside into the brisk morning, his lungs, which had grown to loathe him in the past few hours, rejected the fresh air immediately.

The second lieutenant paused in his stride, coughing harshly into his fist.

As the fit passed, Jean mopped a fine sheen of sweat from his brow with the back of his uniform sleeve.

He felt just a little bit lightheaded but resisted the urge to refill his lungs too quickly for fear of setting off another round of coughing.
Slow, even breaths it was.

Perhaps it really was better that he was heading home rather than working today, he decided.

Havoc rubbed at the base of his throat gingerly.
He faintly wondered if the cold medicine he had back at his apartment would do anything for the raw sensation.

Unbeknownst to Havoc, he was being observed by two suspicious figures from atop the roof of a warehouse on a street adjacent to the command center.

"Target sighted." Lust purred smugly, glancing casually through a pair of binoculars down at the lieutenant.
The seductive homunculus turned her head ever so slightly to beckon her partner in crime to come and take a look.

The binoculars were taken from her hands eagerly and engulfed by two larger hands.
"Mr. Lieutenant looks pale." Gluttony commented, "And he smells sickly, too."

"Of course, Gluttony. What were you expecting?" Lust drawled mildly as she held out a hand to retrieve the binoculars once more.

Gluttony gave them up to her without complaint.
"Hey, Lust… if he dies, can I eat him?" the fat homunculus asked suddenly, lips curving up into a hopeful grin.

"No, you may not." Lust sighed.
"Besides, he's not going to die… not without giving me the information I want anyway."

Gluttony whimpered slightly.
"But when you're all done with him… can I eat him then?"

"No, Gluttony." She reaffirmed, an undertone of annoyance in her voice.
"Why don't you head back to see if Father has something for you to do? I might be somewhat late tonight."

The chubby homunculus brightened.
"Yeah! I'll go help Father! See you later, Lust."
He grinned childishly at her.

The lascivious homunculus wasn't paying him much mind, however.

The second lieutenant was moving at a decent pace, considering that he wasn't feeling well.
Lust decided that if she was going to bump into him casually, she had best get moving.

Havoc shuffled along, hands buried in his pockets.

His nose was beginning to leak again, but he didn't feel inclined to stop long enough to properly tend to it.
Instead, he sniffled liquidly and sighed.

"Damn it. I wish I'd just taken that cold medicine earlier." He sighed to himself.
It might have dulled his senses a bit, but he doubted he'd feel quite as miserable as he currently did.

Why did his apartment have to be this far away from the command center anyway?

The lieutenant could feel a light breeze knifing into his eyeballs and causing them to water.

Tears obscuring his vision.
 He was forced to reach a hand up to swipe them away.

For the briefest of moments, Havoc wasn't paying attention to where he was going.
Alas, before he could reconsider his questionable judgment call, he felt his torso collide with something surprisingly soft.

Too late he tried to sidestep, only succeeding in causing himself to stagger backwards slightly.


"Oof." He grunted in surprise, taking a moment to regain his focus.

"Jean! Are you alright?"

The concerned voice registered in his mind before he could even muster up an intelligible reply.

"I… you… Solaris… w-wha?" He attempted helplessly.
He wasn't sure exactly what had happened, but somehow he'd managed to quite literally run into his girlfriend.

The dark-haired woman seemed to comprehend her boyfriend's confusion as she reached a gloved hand up delicately to stroke his cheek.
"I was on my way to Central Park, but I just couldn't get you off my mind, Jean… That's why I decided to take the scenic route that goes by your workplace." She purred.

Havoc swallowed his dumb confusion and found himself smiling down at her.
"Hey… you don't need to explain yourself to me… Sorry I knocked into you like that, though."
His voice was rough, but he sounded as if he was trying to come off casual.

"I'm alright, don't worry about it." Solaris waved it off, concern seeping back into her tone.
"Are you alright, Jean? You sound terrible."

"Hm? W-Well…"
His blue eyes looked distinctly preoccupied as he tried to decide how to answer her.
"I… you see… hmmm."

She blinked at him innocently, "Jean?"

"W-Well, you knooow h-how it is… a-and theeeen..."
He really wasn't making much sense.

His nostrils flared and his eyelids began to flutter rapidly.

Suddenly, Havoc pivoted about ninety degrees on the heel of his boot.
In the same motion, he lurched forward, burying his face into the crook of his arm.

"Ehhhh…EHHHH… EHHKT'ChAAAAaa! Ehhkt'chaaa! Ehhk'CHAAA!"
He let loose a hushed groan as the last of the sneezes left his body.

"S-Sorry ‘bout that." He mumbled, mouth still buried in one arm as he retrieved his handkerchief with the other.
"…I seeb to have caught a bit of a cold."

Solaris wore an expression that was somewhere between disgust and sympathy.
"You poor, poor man." She purred, grimacing slightly at the fluid sound that was Havoc blowing his nose. 

Humans really could be reduced to even more revolting levels when they were ill.

He sniffled and offered her a wobbly grin.
"Ugh… It's dot too bad… I just couldn't sleep last dight, so I thidk I feel worse thad I actually ab."

 Her concern warmed his heart, but he hated seeing her frown.
He only wished he could put on a more convincing façade for her sake.

The worry, however, never left her features.

"You've been working yourself to the bone, it's a wonder you didn't get sick sooner." She cooed.
She reached a hand upward again, but this time placed a gloved palm on his forehead.

Havoc blinked at her quizzically.
"H-Hey… what are you doi'g? I'b dot that-"

"A fever."
Solaris interrupted, frown deepening.

"Cub agaid?"

"You're running a fever, Jean." She clarified.
"It's slight, but I can tell, even with these gloves on."

Havoc squinted at her a moment, not quite sure how he should go about responding to that.

"Ah… well… I probably just deed a little rest… I'll be fide."
He did his best not to grimace as he cleared his throat.
"Adyway… you bight dot wadt to ha'g arou'd be too lodg… I'd hate for y-you to get sick."

Solaris's frown only deepened, however.
"How could I bring myself to abandon you like this? Will you even make it back to your apartment alright?"

Jean offered a short laugh that only seemed to provoke his lungs.
He did his best to muffle the coughs into his shoulder before turning back to smile at her.

"As I was sayi'g, I'b dot that sick."

Lust frowned inwardly.

Wasn't it every heterosexual man's fantasy to have a woman fawning over him whilst he was ill?
Why was Jean being so unnecessarily evasive?

She supposed further feigned concern was in order.

"But how do I know that's not just your fever talking?" Solaris snaked both of her slender arms around one of his.
"You should at least let me come over and make you a cup of tea." She persisted, staring up at him with a troubled magenta gaze.

Havoc turned away as a few more coughs ripped at his respiratory system.
He suddenly felt a bit lightheaded again… and warm.

Was it the fever?
Probably not, he decided.

He wasn’t convinced Solaris hadn’t just imagined it.
She did look awfully worried over him.

Either way, Havoc realized that standing around here much longer would only make him feel worse… and some tea did sound good.

"Well… I suppose." He caved reluctantly, holding back a sniffle.
"But dod't plad to stay too lo’g, okay?"

Lust resisted the urge to smirk, instead only letting the gentlest of smiles play on her lips.
"Thank you, Jean. I won't stay any longer than necessary, I promise."

"…Alright." Havoc nodded slightly.

If nothing else, having Solaris by his side kept his mind from wandering too far.
His desire not to worry her drove him to try and suppress his symptoms to the best of his ability.

As much as he wanted her to fuss over him, he didn't want to chance her somehow catching his cold.

It just didn't seem like something a proper gentleman would allow.

It was a rather unremarkable dwelling, Lust noted as the lieutenant permitted her into his home.

The apartment was small, making what furniture was present seem cramped together.
That, combined with the heavy stench of cigarette smoke in the air, was enough to make the place unappealing.

"How… quaint." Solaris offered gently.

"Eh… you dod't have to struggle to complibedt it." Havoc sniffled.
"Bilitary housi'g isd't the largest, but it works."

He shed his uniform jacket, folding it carefully over his arm.

Lust scanned the room with a gaze.

There didn't seem to be too many places to search.
That part of her job ought to be easy, at least.

Suddenly feeling renewed patience, the homunculus crossed over into a small kitchenette and began searching the cupboards.
She could hear hacking coughs resonating from behind her, but decided not to acknowledge them.

"Jean, where do you keep your tea?" Solaris inquired in a sheepish tone, turning back to him with a mild frown.

"S-Should be…"
He cleared his throat.
"Should be a box of teabags od the rightha'd side."

"Ah… found it." Solaris said after a moment.

Havoc smiled faintly, jacket still draped over his arm.
He supposed he could go hang it up in his closet.

However, from where he stood he had a perfect view of his sweet Solaris.

The delicate way her gloved hands flitted from his tea kettle to the sink to the knobs on the gas stove mesmerized him…

He sighed appreciatively.
Even when making tea for him, she showed such gentle care.

Once again, he was completely astonished that she was his to love and enjoy.
He just hoped the day didn't come she found a better man…

She was already too perfect for him.

Jean's nose tingled suddenly.
"Ehhh… Ehhk'Chaa!"

He barely managed to catch the sneeze in his shoulder.
He grimaced at both the pain that lanced through his throat, and the sheer damp feeling that soaked through the permeable fabric of his undershirt.

He was beginning to disgust even himself.

Havoc sighed softly and laid his uniform jacket down on his bed for the time being whilst he went to hunt down his cold medicine.

Remarkably, he found the medicine bottle sitting precariously on the edge of the bathroom sink.
Had he really just left it sitting there?

He mumbled something unintelligible under his breath as he plucked the bottle from its unsteady resting place.
The lieutenant scrutinized the label intently.

"Treats symptoms of common cold such as runny nose, sore throat, minor aches and pains…" Havoc skimmed for other information. "
Let's see… Oh, here. Directions. Take two tablets every six hours as needed… do not exceed four doses in a twenty-four-hour period…"

He sniffled wearily.
All of this seemed pretty standard, and the side effect of drowsiness didn't really worry him much now.

"The tea is almost ready, Jean!" Solaris called from the kitchen.

Havoc blinked, faintly wondering if he'd spent that long staring at the label of a cold medicine bottle.

"Hey… Jean… where are you?" her voice was suddenly perplexed.

"I'b here." He assured in a voice as loud as he could manage, plodding back out of the bathroom.
"I was just looki’g for subthi’g… sorry."

"Cold medicine?" Solaris asked, noticing the bottle in his hand.

"Yeah." Havoc nodded slightly.
"Figured it bight help."

Through the guise of Solaris, Lust offered him a reassuring smile.
"That's probably a good idea."

After all, it would make her job even easier.

Chapter Text

"I hope you don't mind." Solaris purred.
"But I noticed you didn't have any teacups, so I poured your tea into a coffee mug."

She sounded almost apologetic as she extended the steaming cup towards him.
It was a rather unremarkable vessel- made of stark white porcelain and without a single decorative mark.

In fact, it could almost pass for one of the mugs often found scattered around the officers' break room.

If she'd cared to put thought to the trivial matter, Lust might have entertained the idea that was perhaps precisely where the mug had come from.
As things were, however, she was content to play the role of a concerned girlfriend to the oblivious second lieutenant.

"Doh, it's alright." Havoc assured with a sniffle, accepting the tea with his free hand.
He breathed the fumes in deeply, trying desperately to pick up some scent through his clogged sinuses.

"Haaaah." He sighed.

At the very least, the warmth was incredibly pleasant.

He almost wished he could curl around the cup, and become lost in the soothingly steamy feeling…
To let it soak up the aching behind his eyes and just sleep the afternoon away…

Havoc realized the bizarreness in that thought and was quick to pin the blame on his fatigue…
Or maybe Solaris was right about the fever after all…

"Yeah, that's probably it…" He decided.

"Jean… is it not to your liking?" Her soft voice broke through his contemplation.

"Hm...? Ah! Doh. It's great." The lieutenant croaked out hurriedly.

He placed the medicine bottle he'd been holding carefully onto the kitchen counter before taking a large swallow from the mug.

Solaris appeared to be looking on worriedly as he coughed and sputtered.
"Easy, don't choke yourself with it." She coaxed.

"R-Right." Havoc offered a lopsided grin as he regained his breath.

Miraculously, he'd managed not to spill any of the contents of his cup during the fit.
He allowed himself a smaller, more modest sip.

He sighed appreciatively, closing his eyes in momentary euphoria.

Lust resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

She couldn't get over what an idiot this lieutenant was.
He was so set on trying not to worry her that he'd dropped all common sense.

"Such a poor, disgusting fool. He lets his perception of love blind him." She thought inwardly as she watched him slowly downing the warm drink.

She'd been tempted when preparing herself for that day to drug the lieutenant. 

Ever so tempted. 

It would have been so simple.
A few droplets in his tea and he'd never question it.

At length, however, she'd decided she'd much rather have him at least dimly in his right mind whilst interrogating him.

She was sure his information would be more coherent that way.

Besides, she decided as she gazed at him through deceptively gentle magenta orbs, he was already rather out of sorts.

When perhaps a third of the mug was left, Havoc swirled the liquid around thoughtfully, if not sleepily.

The tea was good, but it was also very relaxing.
He almost felt like he could nod off where he stood were it not for Solaris's gaze on him.

He stared down into the remaining tea.
It had cooled down enough by this point that he was relatively sure he could avoid his gag reflex whilst swallowing the cold pills…

At least, any related to the sheer heat of the liquid…
His throat felt surprisingly tamed at this point, but he couldn't be sure how easy swallowing something more solid would treat it.

He elected to brace himself for the possibility that it might be considerably less than pleasant.

Lust watched as the lieutenant set his mug on the counter.
His weary blue eyes were filled with an odd sort of determination as he picked up the medicine bottle.

It was almost amusing.

Just as he was working the lid off the bottle, Havoc froze.
His nostrils flared as his features crumpled abruptly.

He whined inwardly.
"Not now." He pleaded as his lungs sucked in air in short, sudden gasps.

His fingers fumbled slightly.
All his attention was drawn into trying to hold back the sneeze.

"EHHHhhh…EHHKT'Chaa! Ehkt'ChAAaa!"

His eyes clamped shut with the explosion, arm flying up automatically to shield Solaris from the spray.

He didn't think.
He simply reacted, trying feebly to be as much of a gentleman as he possibly could in that moment.
The bottle slipped from his hand and clattered to the floor, happily spilling half of its contents out over the wood before Havoc could so much as recover from the fit.

"Jean!" Solaris gasped.

He responded slowly at first.

It was almost as if he didn't quite believe he'd done that.
The lieutenant stood there a long moment with his wrist pressed against his nostrils and sniffled deeply.

Or was that a sigh?
Lust wondered.

"Sorry." He murmured at last, stooping to pick up the bottle.
"Probably should have just put it dowd." He mused to himself.

It was a simple mess, yet seeing it somehow made him feel mournful.
Havoc concluded absently that he really must be tired if a few spilled pills made him feel like crying.

"Jean." Solaris repeated his name, smoother this time, as she bent down carefully so they were at eye level.
"Why don't you take a couple of the pills that are left in the bottle and let me take care of this mess?"

Havoc blinked as he processed her words, his cheeks coloring suddenly.
"W-Wha? Doh. It's by fault. You dod't have to clead up by bess."

Her concern made him feel woozy… or was that his fatigue?
He wasn't quite sure at this point.

"Please." Solaris set a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"It's not that big of a deal… and it seems like you could really do with getting that medicine into your system soon."

He permitted himself a liquid sniffle.
"You sure?" He asked at length.

Solaris offered a light smile.
"You sound miserable, Jean." She stated, electing not to answer him directly.

Havoc sighed, standing back to his full height with the bottle in hand.
“Fide."

He was too tired to continue deliberating the matter.
 He downed a pair of pills before his nasal passages could get the notion to misbehave further.

Lust found a broom and dustpan, making quick work of the small mess.
"So." She spoke casually, "Are you going to get some sleep soon?"

The lieutenant was massaging his temples.
"Yeah… probably after you're dud."

"No need to wait on my account." Solaris said gently.
"Why don't you go get comfortable?"

"I'll wait." Havoc assured wearily.

He pulled out one of the wooden chairs around the small kitchen table and sank into it.
He placed his arms on the tabletop, propping his chin up against the heel of one hand lazily.

"Alright." Solaris gave a concerned sigh.
"Is there anything else you'll need before I go?"

"Dod't thidk so." Havoc sniffled.
"Ugh…"

He was exhausted and knew that he was deteriorating quickly.
He could tell due to the fact his symptoms were starting to bother him less, and his thoughts were growing more disjointed.

Once the cold medicine hit, the lieutenant seriously doubted he'd retain the ability to resist the notion of sleep any longer…
It'd be best if Solaris left before then, he was certain.

"I could clean the house for you, if you want." Solaris was offering.
"Or perhaps…"

Havoc wondered faintly if he'd zoned out in the middle of her offering various chores.
The poor girl was probably growing more concerned than she needed to be because of his damn inner monologue.

"Crap… okay… say something to assure her. Make it believable!" A voice in his head, that he could only assume was his conscience, coached.

Instead, a gaping yawn preceded a slurred, "I'b okay."
He paused, blinking moist lashes sleepily.
"Really… you cad go."

He was mildly frustrated with how simple and groggy his own voice sounded.

"Way to make her feel better." 
Sarcasm dripped from his thoughts.

Another yawn and those thoughts seemed more of a whisper.
He closed his eyes for an agonizingly long moment.

Damn.
He was tired…

And who knew his kitchen chairs were this comfortable?

Solaris stopped talking, or so he assumed, for all had fallen silent.

"Jean." Solaris prodded his shoulder gently.

"Mm?" The lieutenant responded sluggishly, staring at her with eyes half-mast.

Lust assessed him with a stare.

He had the look of a man hovering on the brink of sleep, caught somewhere between coherent thought and dreams.

In truth, she'd been stalling.
Listing things off as she'd watched his alertness taper off.

He was stubborn, she'd give him that, but he seemed rather subdued at this point.

"You didn't finish telling me about your morning." She gave a small, plaintive sigh.
Lust was fishing, waiting eagerly to see how he responded.

Havoc blinked sleepily and rubbed at his face with a muffled groan.

Had he been telling her about his morning?
He didn't recall…

Was there a chance he'd been babbling mindlessly?
Did he even talk in his sleep?
Hmmm.

Then again, of the two of them, she was the one with a clear head.

He yawned.
"Sorry… I'b just a little tired."

Lust grinned inwardly.

He was taking her word as truth. 
Excellent.

"It's fine. I understand… your boss has been pretty hard on you, hasn't he?" Solaris cooed in a concerned way.

"Bei'g a soldier isd't about havi'g thi'gs easy."
Havoc sniffled, managing what he thought was a flirty grin.

"Still," she sighed, sashaying around behind him to massage his shoulders.
"It isn't fair for him to work you into the ground."

Weary as he was, the lieutenant could feel the warmth of her breath on the back of his neck and sighed contentedly.
"He has his reasods."

Lust's ears were burning for more.
"What sort of reasons?" she asked carefully as she worked his shoulders with her petite hands.

"Hell if I doh." Havoc mumbled sleepily, head bobbing forward slightly in relaxation.

She dug her fingernails into his shoulder blades slightly in frustration, causing him to jerk.

"Nngh… easy." He pleaded.

"Sorry." Solaris said sheepishly.

"S'okay." Havoc yawned…
This was really rather a nice dream, he decided.

"So… have you gotten to tell your friends about me, or are they all too busy as well?" She asked conversationally.

"…Is it bad if I wadt to keep you to byself?"
His voice was sounding drifty again.

"No, of course not." She backpedaled smoothly.
"Just inconveniently frustrating."

"I'll buy it for you." Havoc said suddenly.

"Hm?" Lust was genuinely curious now.
Perhaps he really was more feverish than she'd thought.

"That dress…" He yawned, leaning forward slightly to pillow his head on folded arms.
"You said you wadted it… right?... So… I'll… buy it… for you."

The homunculus rolled her eyes.
"Really? Half- delirious with exhaustion and all you can think about is a little lie I fed you last night? You disappoint me."

Havoc was dozing off, but Lust was exasperated just enough not to care.

"Fine." She decided, brushing a strand of dark hair from her eyes.
She would let him sleep for now.

She was sure searching his apartment would be much more fruitful than their conversation anyhow.

Lust quietly removed herself from the kitchen and surveyed the small apartment for the second time since she'd arrived.

This search should be easy.
The lieutenant didn't seem to own much in the way of anything.

He was a simple soldier.
A country boy.

"In other words, pathetic." Lust concluded blandly as she began her hunt.

Chapter Text

Lust started for the lieutenant's bedroom.

In observing humans, the fools seemed to think their bedrooms were impervious to prying eyes.

They hid money under mattresses.
Notes in books under their pillows.

Sometimes, they didn’t even bother to hide the secrets their rooms bore, leaving them in plain sight on a bedside table.

It was so incredibly ridiculous and frankly laughable.

Lieutenant Havoc seemed simple enough to fit the formula, so she wasted little time in beginning her search of the cramped space.

A small table sat beside the bed, featuring a mechanical alarm clock and little else.
The bed itself was haphazardly made, his discarded jacket from this morning laying on top.
Apart from that, there was a tiny two drawer dresser which she could only assume held his casual clothing, and a closet.

Turning the dresser inside out was hardly a task.
Sadly, it was completely devoid of anything but clothing.

Undeterred, she moved on.

The closet was barely large enough for his uniforms to hang.
Honestly, she almost felt sorry for him... almost.

A thorough search of Jean Havoc's uniform pockets left the homunculus with two cigarettes, an empty tin of breath mints, and a spare lighter.
With a small huff, she tossed the useless menagerie back into the pocket of the last uniform she’d searched and moved on.

Surely, he had to have something of interest.


Lust began searching the bed.
She patted down the rumpled sheets and pillow before carefully reaching under the mattress.

It was beginning to look like a wash as well when her hand grazed something.
A light crinkling sound followed whatever it was.

Lust grinned widely.
“Ah! So the fool does hide things under his mattress!” she thought triumphantly.

She swept her hand back slowly towards the crinkling object, working it carefully into her grasp.

It felt like a crumpled piece of paper.
Perhaps a sensitive document no one was meant to see?

Fingers locked around it, Lust gave a swift tug to retrieve her treasure.

“Now, let’s see what you’re hiding, Jean.” she murmured quietly.

She began to unfold the paper, taking her time so as not to damage any precious intel waiting inside.

Her gentle work paid off.
She finally worked out the last folds, opening the paper… and her spirits sank.
It was a damned list for an office food run, complete with smears of long-since dried mustard and a fossilized piece of a bread crust.

Lust had to resist the urge to shriek in frustration.
She balled up the messy paper and threw it across the room.

“That idiot!” she hissed out between her teeth.

The lascivious homunculus decided she’d had quite enough of Havoc’s bedroom for the time being, so she decided to look elsewhere.
Anywhere else.

As the minutes turned into well over an hour, Lust found herself both growing increasingly frustrated and increasingly nervous.

She wasn’t sure how long the lieutenant could remain asleep at the kitchen table.
While he’d been extremely tired, she was sure the awkward position would cause him enough discomfort to wake up before long.

She was desperate to find something worthwhile before then.
He couldn’t possibly be this simple, could he?

Everyone had secrets!
Where did he keep the things he would rather forget?
Where was the one important document he neglected to dispose of properly?
Where were the skeletons in his closet?!

Both to her fortune and dread, there was soon one place left to search—a small coat closet off the entryway.

Lust opened the door and began carefully sifting through the lieutenant’s mess.
She wasn’t expecting much at this point.

It felt like she’d been at it for an eternity when at last something stood out.

Amidst the clutter was a rather old-looking cigar box.
It looked like it had seen better days.
A faded red paint was chipping away from the outside, though the structural integrity of the wooden box seemed sturdy enough.

Taking a moment to glance over her shoulder and make sure the lieutenant hadn’t roused without her notice, Lust carefully knelt by the closet door with the box in hand.

The room was still.

Lust nodded to herself and carefully opened the box.
She allowed herself a small smirk.

Well, this looked promising.

Inside the old cigar box were several folded papers, yellowed with age and bound together loosely with a bit of twine.

Gingerly, Lust untied the twine.
She took the top paper from the stack and unfolded it.

Unlike the food list from Havoc’s room, this paper was smaller and seemed to have much more to say.
The homunculus began to read:

September 1858
To my beloved,
The sayings are true; absence does make the heart grow fonder.
I cannot seem to go a day without you on my mind.
I will never forget the long summer days tending your father’s animals.
You tripped me in the mud out by the pigpen that first day and I knew there was something special.
You are as wild as an unbroken horse, yet as lovely as a swan on water.
I can still taste the kiss goodbye we shared under the old oak tree.
My heart aches for the day I can see you again.

If only the distance were shorter.
Once I finish school, I plan to work full-time at my family’s general store.
I need to start saving for the future…
 With any good luck, I’ll see you again next summer, my dearest.

Until then, I selfishly hope you will be thinking of me as well.

Yours,
M. Havoc

Lust blinked.
What even was this?
A coded message?

There didn’t seem to be any pattern, rhyme or reason it would be.
She supposed she’d have to read further to truly tell.

She shuffled through and grabbed one about five notes down.

March 1859
To my sweetheart,
I am so sorry to hear about your broken arm.
An angry mare really has a sharp kick.
I am sure by now you have received the care package my mother and I put together, but I wanted to remind you that I still think of you daily.

My cherry pie is getting better. You must try some next time you come around!
I hope your arm heals quickly and you can return to me this summer.
I will be counting the days until then.
Love,
A. Rowan

Lust stared at the paper and made a face.

Were all of them like this?
Sappy, ridiculous attempts at love notes?

What was Jean even holding onto these for?
If the dates were any indication, they certainly weren’t his.

Quickly losing hope, she chose one more to read from near the bottom of the stack.

June 1902
Jean,
I know this is not an easy topic, so I want to tell you I am honored you chose to confide in me.
I know it may not seem like it, but I was once an awkward teenager, too.
You are taking note of all those beautiful girls, and you have not a clue what to say.

This does not mean you are hopeless.
Nor does this mean that you will never find a girlfriend.

Women are strange, wonderful creatures and no two are exactly alike.
That said, they all have one thing in common—they appreciate when you take notice of the little things they fail to put into words.

It can be a tricky game to play. You may not always realize it is even happening.
However, all women drop subtle hints.
What they like, what they cannot stand, what they dream of.
Worry less about what you will say and try to listen.

With practice, I guarantee you will learn what makes a girl happy.
And perhaps what will make one girl very happy is to get to know you.

I am always here and always believing in you.

Love,
Grandpa

Havoc stirred to the sound of his own snorting for breath.
He picked his head off the kitchen table and looked around blearily.

The second lieutenant wasn’t sure just how long he’d been asleep, but it was certainly long enough to leave him stiff.
His neck and shoulders ached something awful, adding to his present misery.

He reached his hands up on either side, kneading at the back of his neck and attempting to work his way down.


Absently, he wished Solaris was still here.
He wasn’t entirely sure if he’d dreamed it or not, but a vague memory of her massaging his shoulders as he’d drifted off was still swirling pleasantly around his brain.

Well, even if she had still been around, he wasn’t sure he had the nerve to request it now.
He didn’t want to come across too needy…

Havoc pushed his chair in as he stood, chancing a glance out the kitchen window.

It didn’t look too late.
Probably early afternoon at best.

That explained why his brain still felt extra hazy, at least.
The nighttime cold medicine was probably still in his system.
It was just as well, he supposed.

He sniffled, attempting to blow his nose into a paper napkin.
It didn’t do much, save for making his already bothered nose a bit rawer.
He sighed.

Even medicated, he felt like garbage.

Sleepily, he fiddled around in his pocket, locating a pack of cigarettes and his lighter.
Good sense might’ve reminded him how well smoking had gone this morning, but brain muddled by illness and cold medicine, he just wanted a little something to make him feel better.

He opened the kitchen window slightly for a little ventilation, then lit up.

The letters were all useless.
Complete and utter sentimental garbage!

Lust couldn’t decide if she hated the second lieutenant or if he was so simple that he circled back around to being amusing.
At the moment, she was a bit frustrated to decide entirely.

What a wasted day.

Suddenly, loud hacking noises erupted from the kitchen and the homunculus froze.
Well, if she hadn’t been out of time before, she was now.

She hastily wrapped the twine back around the letters and tossed them in the cigar box, hoping to get the closet closed before Jean could round the corner and catch her in the act.

Today might be a loss, but there was still a chance he could have a slip of the tongue.
It seemed an even greater waste to have to dispose of her would-be informant.

Chapter Text

Lust tossed her long waves over her shoulder, surveying the room once more to make sure nothing was readily out of place.

Another round of hacking came from the kitchen.
She supposed it was best to slip out while mister tall, blond, and simple was distracted.

Her hand closed around the knob, just starting to turn when—

“Solaris?”
The single word crackled behind her.


She turned on her heel swiftly.

There stood Jean Havoc, leaning in the doorway between the entryway and the kitchen.

He looked rather worn down.
His cheeks were red from all the coughing.
Despite this, he was still holding a lit cigarette between his fingers as it trailed smoke into the living quarters.

He coughed again, catching it in the crook of his arm.
“What’re you still doi’g here?”


She adopted a soft expression.
“I know you didn't want me to stay too long, but I just couldn't help it!" she pouted.
"I was worried to leave you all by yourself, Jean. You look just dreadful.”

His confusion softened into a gentle smile.


“You dun gotta worry ‘bout be.” He attempted, “I got cold beds, cubfort beasures.”
He raised his cigarette and took a drag as if to demonstrate.

His lungs were not having any of his shenanigans and rebelled.
He huffed and choked, struggling to contain the coughs so eager to rip their way out of him.

Solaris crossed her arms, “Jean, I don’t think that’s doing you any good right now.” She sighed.
How dense was he, exactly?!

The second lieutenant looked just a tad hurt and sighed.
“Yeah, I guess dot.” He conceded slowly, muffling a cough into his shoulder.


He leaned further into the edge of the doorway as he snuffed the cigarette out on the bottom of his boot.
Well, so much for ‘comfort measures’.

Havoc stumbled slightly as he pushed off from the doorway, causing the homunculus to wonder what he was up to.
He disposed of the unfinished cigarette and rolled his shoulders with a deep sigh.


“Sorry I got ya all worked up…” he paused to cough a few times into the back of his wrist, “I’ll be fide, hodest.”


Lust ignored his attempts to assure ‘Solaris’.
She had one more chance today after all, it seemed.

“Do your shoulders hurt, Jean?” she asked softly.


“Hm?” he blinked.
“Ah… a bit. Got all stiff sleepi’g at the table.” He admitted sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.


She offered a sympathetic-looking frown.
“Oh, you poor thing.” She cooed.
“I should’ve just woken you to get you to go lie down.”

“Ehhh… Ehhhk’chaaa! Ehhhck’chuuuu!”
He sniffled miserably, only offering her a dismissive hand wave.

Havoc hadn’t been awake for long, but whatever small burst of energy his catnap had provided was waning.
It was now or never.

Lust went all in.
She sauntered up behind the second lieutenant, delicately putting a hand at the center of his back.

He blinked, glancing down at her curiously.


Solaris made a gentle circle with her hand.
“Why don’t you go lay down and get comfortable, Jean? I can rub your back and shoulders to help you relax.” She purred gently.

Havoc could feel warmth rushing to his head.
His heart pounding in his ears.

He was dead.
Or dreaming.
Maybe even hallucinating.

Luck was never this much on his side.

“Jean?”


He heard Solaris’s voice laced with concern, snapping him out of his stunned stupor.

Reluctantly, Havoc glanced down, meeting his girlfriend’s worried magenta gaze.
He could still feel her hand on his back, but for a moment he worried he really had been daydreaming.

“Sorry. Spaced out.” He apologized finally.


She offered a sad smile.
“All the more reason you ought to lay down.”
She gave him a soft push forward, “Come on, let’s get you comfortable.”


His heart was thudding in his ears again.

Oh Lord.
This was actually happening.


Havoc nodded dumbly and stumbled into his bedroom.
He sat on the bed, took off his boots, and then sprawled out on his stomach atop the blankets.

Lust stood, waiting for him to finish shifting around.


Havoc turned his head to the side, one blue eye locked on to his beautiful Solaris.
“You sure ‘bout this?” he mumbled, coming to the realization he probably should’ve double-checked before now.


“Of course.” She smiled in turn.
“You just relax and let me take care of everything.”

He smiled faintly.

The lascivious homunculus began working his back and shoulders in perfect, practiced movements.
Her hands moved soft, but strong, working away the knots in the lieutenant’s muscles.


Havoc sighed happily.
“I dod’t deserve you…” he mumbled into the pillow.


“Of course you do!” Lust admonished.

At least, he deserved enough attention to still be on her radar.
He was in that flame colonel’s inner circle.


“Ya haved’t bet by C.O.” he slurred sulkily.


Bingo.
Perhaps they were getting somewhere.


“Who? Colonel Mustang?” Solaris asked innocently.


“Yeah.” Havoc replied dully.
“He’s got a habit of steali’g by girlfrie’ds…”
He sighed deeply, eliciting a string of coughs.


The homunculus smirked.
“Well, you don’t have to worry about that, Jean.” She mused.
“I hate overconfident men.”

She watched him smile widely as she continued to knead at his back and shoulders.
She pressed a bit harder when she saw his eyelid fluttering.

He grunted but didn’t offer any other complaint.

“I’m sorry the colonel has made you feel subpar.” She said softly, hoping to coax him on.


“Eh… he’s a paid id the ass,” Havoc yawned.
“But he’s dot all bad.”


“Oh?”


“Yeah.”
Another yawn.


Lust resisted the urge to groan.

Could he really not offer examples?
He was putty in her hands!
This should not be this difficult!


“Wha ‘bout you?” Havoc slurred suddenly.
“Ehhh…Ehhhk’chaaaaa!”
He sneezed, but then glanced back at her expectantly.


“What?” Solaris asked.


“How are ya so gedtle, but codfidadt? Ya doh yer beautiful a’d you go fer what ya wadt.” He mumbled sleepily.


“Oh that?” She offered a light laugh.
“I’m the only girl with all brothers. Being shy and passive was never an option.” She mused.

He chuckled slightly but quickly crumpled into coughing.
He struggled to catch his breath.

“Ugh… d’you get alo’g… with your brothers?” he asked.


“More or less. One of my little brothers follows me just about everywhere.” Solaris mused with a shake of her head.


“Oh yeah?” Havoc said lightly.


The homunculus paused, realizing how he’d managed to derail the conversation.
She would’ve considered it a clever tactic if she wasn’t positive he was genuinely curious about her.

“But enough about me.” She tried to get him to focus.
“Let’s talk about you.” She purred.


Havoc blinked, opening his mouth to speak.
Instead, he coughed weakly.

“Dunno if I got it id be.” He confessed a moment later, voice growing rougher by the minute.

Solaris offered a disappointed sigh.
“Of course. Forgive me. The colonel gives you the day off to rest and I spend the whole time making you talk yourself hoarse.”

“H-Hey. Doh worries.” He coughed again.
“I like just spe’di’g tibe with you… jus’ wish I was better cubpady.”

His eyes drifted close, which was just as well.
He couldn’t see her look of disdain.

What a sappy, pathetic human.

Clearly, this last-ditch effort to get him talking wasn’t working.
She’d been so sure this would be a golden opportunity, but somehow as out of it as the second lieutenant was, he just wasn’t offering anything remotely useful.

As much as she hated to admit it, it was time to cut her losses for today.

Lust worked his back and shoulders until she felt his breathing even out beneath her hands.
His breath came in congested snores, eyes closed.

She pulled back.
“Well, Jean,” she said quietly as she stepped out of his room, “Bravo, you’ve managed to waste an entire day… I suppose we’ll just have to try again another time.”

She shook her head to herself as she slipped out of the apartment and back into the streets.

Deep beneath Central, Gluttony and Envy sat in wait.
Their sister ought to return before long.

The rounder of the two sniffed the air and perked up suddenly.

Envy glanced over curiously, arms akimbo.
“What is it this time? If you leave the bones of one more chimera lying around, I swear—”

“It’s Lust!” Gluttony interrupted brightly, fairly bouncing with excitement as he threw his arms in the air.

“Way to spoil my entrance.” Lust lamented, but smirked nonetheless.
“Did you miss me?”


“Uh huh.” Gluttony nodded emphatically.


Envy crossed his arms, violet eyes regarding the lascivious homunculus.
“Well? Did the lieutenant spill his guts or what?”

“Hardly.” Lust sighed, raising both arms to shrug as she tossed her long hair over her shoulder.
“I’m beginning to think the man is completely hopeless.”


Envy snorted.


“I’m serious. He didn’t even have a diary or something to use for blackmail.” Lust huffed.
“He’s disgustingly simple.”


“See! What did I tell you!” Envy chortled.
“The second lieutenant barely has two brain cells to bounce off of each other. He’s been a waste of your time from day 1.”


Lust folded her own arms, eyes narrowed.
“He’s still in Mustang’s inner circle and may yet prove useful to us.” She reminded coolly.
“Don’t discount him just yet.”

Envy smirked, “Suuuure. Just admit it, your whole plan was a fool’s errand!”


Lust made a sound of displeasure but refused to rise to the bait.
Envy was right, though, as much as she hated it.

Jean Havoc was definitely not the fountain of information she’d initially anticipated.

He was just a hopeless, foolish human in love with a woman who didn't truly exist.
If he wasn't so frustrating, he'd almost be endearing...
Almost.