Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

After falling into the Abyss, Ajax had come back changed; he was more often than not consumed by battle hunger and bloodlust, and nothing his family did could help. Ajax would prowl the streets, looking for people who rubbed him the wrong way and fighting them ‘til he was victorious. With every passing day, his behavior worsened, until his family eventually couldn’t take it anymore.

In his family’s small dining room, Ajax’s parents gathered.

“I can’t take it anymore,” Ajax’s father growled, face tight with tension and slight hints of fear.

“It’ll be okay,” His wife comforted, but even she knew her words rang false. Her shoulders trembled in fear and she worried her apron with her hands. Silence reigned for a few moments, until she haltingly asked, “What should we do?”

Her husband took a deep breath, squaring his shoulders and setting his jaw. “At this point, I believe we’ll have to call the Fatui to take him away.”

She looked at him in disbelief, tone growing fraught with worry. “Ajax is a child, he’ll never be able to survive that. And moreover, he’s our son. How could we just send him away like that?”

He gave her a deep stare. “How else will we deal with him? We’ve tried everything, from talking to him to trying to tire out his energy. His older siblings are scared, the villagers are scared, and everyone’s pressuring us to take care of his behavior. What else can we do?”. His voice trembled with suppressed anger and grief at what he was saying, but he knew he couldn’t do anything more for his son.

His wife clenched her fists. “I-,” she trailed off, “I think we can try one last thing.”

“Please,” she begged, staring up at him with desperate eyes, “give him one more chance. If this doesn’t work out, we’ll send him to the Fatui. Let’s just try one more thing.”

Her husband silently gestured for her to continue.

Tremblingly, she murmured, “My oldest sister, the one living in Liyue, just put up a bakery. She told me about it in one of her letters the other week. What if we send Ajax there?”

“Can your sister even handle Ajax? Even for us, he’s too much to handle,” he stated coldly.

“She’s a vision user. She should be able to handle him. And maybe he’ll be able to learn how to manage his emotions with her; she’s always been able to calm people down.”

Ajax’s father put his head in his hands, evidently thinking about it. “Okay,” he said. “Write to your sister and let her know about this. I’ll break the news to Ajax and let him know about this.”

His wife nodded, slumping her shoulders in relief as she hurried off to their room. “I’ll write to her now.”

Ajax’s father sighed as she left. ‘I’m sorry Ajax, but this is the best we can do for you. We can’t let you keep hurting everyone around you,’ he thought. He stayed where he was until nightfall, when everyone in the family had come back.

That night, Ajax’s older siblings were evidently keeping a wider berth from him, while Tonia, Anton, and Teucer stayed close, unaware of how dangerous being in his vicinity was. Ajax’s cheek was cut, and his clothes were lightly splattered in blood, though none of them knew whether it belonged to a human or an animal.

His parents both stared at him in slight horror, before his father finally broke the silence that had fallen over everyone.

“Ajax,” he cleared his throat, expression unreadable, “your mother and I have contacted your aunt in Liyue. You’ll be living with her starting tomorrow. Pack your bags. We’ll leave in the morning.”

His children were startled by his sudden announcement, devolving into chaos.

“Papa, what’s going on?” Ajax exclaimed in shock and fear. Why were they sending him away? He had tried his best to fit in with everyone after those grueling months in the Abyss. While he knew he wasn’t perfect, he was trying. Didn’t they see his effort?

Tonia was clutching their father’s sweater, trying to ask why he said that Ajax would be leaving. Anton gripped onto Ajax’s hand, processing what their father had said amidst all the noise. Teucer, still a baby, was babbling in Anton’s hold, unknowing of the fact that his brother would be leaving them soon.

Ajax’s older siblings remained silent, staring down at the floor while inwardly sighing in relief. While they loved Ajax, that love was not enough to cover their fear of him. Guiltily, they wished him the best, not even trying to argue against their parents’ decision.

Ajax felt his heart breaking, unable to come to terms with what was going on. His parents shot him a guilty look, with his mother trying to comfort him. Unfortunately, as soon as her hand reached out to pat his head, Ajax jolted. The unexpected movement shocked her, causing her to flinch away from him. Seeing this flinch, Ajax lowered his eyes to the ground, heart turning cold.

Eventually, he mumbled out an affirmative reply. He gently gave Anton’s hand a gentle squeeze before slowly releasing his grasp on him. Then, he trudged up to his and Tonia’s room, face unnervingly blank and mind empty. Upon making it to their room, he closed the door and sat on his bed, still unable to process everything his father said.

Everything was slowly sinking in. Ajax wanted to shout, to cry, to do anything he could to make his parents and family take him back. Tears dripped down his face as he started sobbing in heaving breaths, shuddering all the while. His mind was filled with thoughts of what he could’ve done–how he could possibly convince them to let him stay.

‘Stupid Ajax. You should’ve held back. So what if they didn’t believe you? It’s fine. So what if they’re all scared of you now? You should’ve done something–anything.’

Ajax was beating himself up inside his mind, full of regret and hurt. After a while, he finally managed to get his bearings. He took a deep breath right as the door opened and Tonia entered, looking worse for wear. Her eyes were red and teary, and he knew his weren’t any better.

Upon making eye contact with him, Tonia’s tears burst out once more as she cried even harder. Her tears wouldn’t stop, and she desperately gasped for breath as she snuggled herself into his chest. Ajax blankly wrapped his arms around her, trying to stop his tears from flowing out again.

He was the big brother; he should take care of his siblings. Although he wanted to join her in crying, Ajax knew he couldn’t. He needed to support her, be there for her.

However, those thoughts flew away the moment Tonia’s arms wrapped around his neck, squeezing him as though she never wanted to let go.

“Brother, it’s okay,” she mumbled against his chest, “I’m here for you. Let it out.”

Ajax took a shuddering breath before the waterworks suddenly erupted. He buried his head beside Tonia’s, breathing in her scent and feeling comfort surge through him.

“I’ll miss you,” He hiccupped out before the tears took over again.

The two siblings eventually tired themselves out, collapsing onto each other and passing out in bed.

The next morning, Ajax was awoken by a rough shake and a whisper of his name.

“Ajax,” his mother whispered softly, “You need to get up and pack. You’ll be leaving today.”

He opened his eyes to the bright morning light and to the sight of his mother’s eyes, wet with unshed tears and glistening with unspoken grief. Tonia stirred in his arms as he moved, clutching onto his clothes tighter as she murmured in her sleep, “Don’t go, big brother.”

Ajax felt his heart break even further, but he gently moved her away. His movements, gentle as they were, still woke her up. Tonia blearily rubbed her eyes open as she moved closer to him, trying to pull him back to sleep.

However, the sound of their mother’s movements caused her to shoot up in alarm. She glanced around warily before finding their mother rummaging through his closet, grabbing what clothes she could and packing them up into a bag.

Immediately, Tonia’s mind flashed back to last night and she let out a piercing shout, “Mama, what’re you doing? Is brother really leaving? Please don’t do this.”

The shout woke everyone up, causing them to barrel into his and Tonia’s room in alarm. Ajax looked up at them all. His older siblings were blank-faced, staring at him with hints of guilt and sadness in their eyes. Meanwhile, Anton, holding Teucer, took a quick look at what was going on before scrambling to Ajax and Tonia.

“Don’t go,” he tearily mumbled.

Ajax’s father was already dressed, evidently ready to send him off to Liyue so that he could be someone else’s problem. His gaze was heavy yet stern, filled with suppressed grief.

“Change your clothes, son,” He said. “We’ll leave after your mother packs your things and we have breakfast.”

Ajax nodded mutely before grabbing a pair of clothes to change into. Numbly, he stepped into the bathroom to take a quick shower and freshen up. Once finished, he went back to his room to remember it one last time. His mother, long finished with packing, handed him his bag before going down to the dining table. His siblings were most likely down there as well, since his room was devoid of people.

He took one last glance over his and Tonia’s room, memorizing its scent and appearance. Then, he turned away before the tears could escape and closed the door softly, feeling as if he had just closed the door to his own heart.

Ajax took slow steps downstairs, finding his family gathered around the table. The table was laden with syrniki and blini, the scent of food heavy in the air. Ajax sat down and took a few pieces of each, biting down without tasting anything.

The mood was heavy. No one spoke, focusing on the food and sneaking glances at him every once in a while.

Finally, breakfast was finished. His parents stood up and called him to them.

“Say goodbye to your siblings,” his father said as he gripped his shoulder tightly. “We’ll be heading out after that.”

Immediately, Tonia and Anton pounced on him, hugging him tightly and begging him not to go. The rest of his siblings mumbled out brief goodbyes, wishing him well. His mother gave him a worried gaze, “We’re sorry Ajax, but we don’t know what to do anymore. This was the only thing we could think of that could help you.”

Ajax wanted to rage upon hearing that. ‘You could’ve done more,’ he venomously thought.

‘Why didn’t you love me enough? Why was I not good enough?’

He said nothing, giving his mother a small nod. Then, he bent down to press a kiss to his younger siblings’ foreheads, seeing his older siblings startle out of the corner of his eye.

‘They’ll never love you again. They’re scared of you,’ the venomous voice in his mind hissed.

Ajax ignored the voice, ignored how hard his heart was hurting. He pulled away from Tonia and Anton and turned to his father.

“We can go now.”

His father nodded tightly and gazed at him again in unspoken grief.

“Let’s go.”

Chapter Text

Upon leaving the house, Ajax and his father rented a carriage to take them to Snezhnaya’s capital, Snezhnograd. Though the carriage was pricey, his father knew that it would perhaps be one of the only comforts he could offer his son before he left him to fend for himself.

The journey took about a day as they took as little stops as possible. Finally, upon making it there, Ajax’s father found a group of merchants who could take Ajax with them as they headed to Liyue. He handed him a letter, saying that it was from his mother and was addressed to his aunt in Liyue.

“Ajax,” his father’s face crumpled in grief. “I’m sorry but this was the only solution we could think of. Until you learn to control your temper and go back to who you were, you’ll be staying at your aunt’s. She’s a vision user, learn from her.”

Ajax’s lips trembled with the urge to cry, “ Okay, papa. I’ll try. I’m sorry, but I really tried. Those 3 months in the Abyss…did something to me.”

His father, still disbelieving of his experiences, just gave him a long, hard stare before nodding.

“Off you go then. I paid those merchants. They’ll take you to Liyue Harbor with them. Once you’re there, head to your aunt’s. Be safe.”

“Okay.”

Ajax gave his father one last look, afraid to hug him in fear of hurting him. However, his father surprised him by pulling him close to his chest. Strong, warm arms wrapped around him and he felt the telltale wetness of tears on his hair. His father let go.

“Goodbye, son. I’m sorry it had to be this way.”

Ajax swallowed his tears down, afraid that opening his mouth would let them out. He remained silent until their goodbye was interrupted.

“Hey kid, hate to break it to you, but we’re heading off now,” One of the merchants shouted at them.

Ajax let go of his father and turned to the merchants’ caravan, taking his bag with him as he climbed up to sit in the back. He gave one last longing glance at Snezhnaya, taking in the sights and smells. He knew it would be a long time before he’d be able to come back.

The merchants’ caravan set off at a brisk pace, pulled ahead by horses and steered by an experienced Snezhnayan merchant. Ajax stayed silent in the back while the rest of the merchants and passengers spoke. They were telling jolly tales of their experiences, but Ajax didn’t have it in him to join their chatter. He just wanted to grieve the loss of life as he knew it.

They shot him questioning looks, trying to get him to join in the conversation, but he gave stilted, one-word answers. Eventually, they learned to ignore him as they talked amongst themselves. This continued until they reached one of Snezhnaya’s ports. There, they carried the goods and loaded them into the ship that would take them straight to Liyue harbor. 

As they sailed along the ocean, Ajax caught sight of things he had never seen before. The open waters were vast, and he could only see blue. It felt as though the world was made solely of water. With the salty breeze hitting his face and the scent of the ocean surrounding him, he felt at peace.

‘Papa, mama, I’m sorry for everything,” Ajax silently grieved. “I’ll learn to control myself in Liyue so that I can one day go back to all of you.”

As he stared out into the vast ocean, Ajax finally felt some parts of his bloodlust vanish. Throughout the ride, he had been suppressing his desire to battle, which was partly what led to his lack of interaction with the others. Now, as his vision pulsed with the waves and he got a glimpse of what true freedom looked–and smelled–like, he was slowly calming down.

He enjoyed the peace, sitting by the deck and feeling the breeze on his face. He had already removed the majority of his layers, though he kept his red scarf on. It was a gift that Tonia had given him during his birthday. She had knitted it herself, despite being a beginner.

The peace was broken by a loud cry reverberating across the deck. 

“Monsters! There are monsters close by! They’re coming in our direction!”

Ajax’s head shot up. Monsters? Where?

He glanced around, spotting a group of seal-like enemies heading in their direction. 

“They’re blubberbeasts. Relatively harmless,” Someone explained.

Everyone onboard breathed a sight of relief. However, the blubberbeasts continued advancing toward the ship, looking as though they had a goal in mind. 

“What’s going on,” A merchant cried out, “Why are they still heading here? They’re about to touch the ship!”

The merchants were cowering, while their hired guards were unable to do much to defeat the blubberbeasts. They mostly used melee weapons, with only one or two capable of shooting arrows, which didn’t do nearly enough damage to the enemies. 

Amidst the panic, Ajax shot up and ran towards the beasts, using his vision to form hydro arrows and tossing them at the enemies. Miraculously, his efforts were working. He formed a bow, shooting and tossing the occasional arrow. As he got closer to the beasts, he jumped off deck and created two hydro blades to slash at the enemies. He continued fighting, using his vision to move around the water.

Eventually, he defeated all the blubberbeasts and jumped back on deck. Panting heavily, he surveyed his surroundings, noting how the merchants and their guards were staring at him in awe. 

“Amazing”

Ajax hunched into himself, slightly scared by the way they gazed at him. Back in Morepsok, no one had ever been amazed by his combat skills. Sure they were awed, but it was the kind of awe that had underlying notes of fear–the kind of awe where they silently wondered if they’d be the next of his victims.

“Boy, that was marvellous!”

Someone patted him on the shoulder, hands firm and warm. Another shook his hand, proclaiming his thanks. Ajax was surrounded by people who, for the first time, were appreciative of his skills–who didn’t look at him like he was a monster.

Following the mishap with the blubberbeasts, the rest of the ride was peaceful, with merchants coming up every now and then to talk to him. 

Slowly, Ajax was beginning to open up.

The journey continued on for another few days. Being surrounded by the sea–and by people who actually liked him–did wonders for Ajax. He was gradually becoming livelier, making friends with the other passengers on the ship. He asked all sorts of questions about their experiences, feeling a surge of excitement every time they mentioned how beautiful Liyue was. 

Among the other merchants, Ajax had gotten to know a few pretty well. One of them was Ivanovich, a Snezhnayan merchant who exported everyday Snezhnayan goods and sold them in Liyue. According to him, his goods were pretty popular, selling out quickly.

“What’re you doing heading to Liyue Harbor all alone, lad,” Ivanovich asked. 

“My parents want me to help out at my aunt’s bakery,” Ajax replied, his tone light as he tried to steer the conversation away. While he initially didn’t want to accept it, Ajax could understand where his parents were coming from. Still, it stung to experience how quickly they kicked him out when his behavior disturbed them. ‘So much for always loving me,’ he thought wryly.

“A bakery!” Ivanovich exclaimed, “where is it and what does she sell?”

“I’m not too sure about what she sells, but my parents said it should be somewhere close to Wanmin Restaurant, wherever that is…”

Ivanovich closed his eyes, evidently deep in thought, before opening them again in shock. “Is Sasha your aunt?”

“Yes, she is. It’ll be my first time meeting her though,” Ajax explained shyly, “She’s married to a Liyuen, so she lives there now and rarely comes back.”

Ivanovich’s brows furrowed in thought, “Sasha recently gave birth, so I do believe she could use your help.”

Ajax’s eyes widened in shock. 

“A baby! That’s amazing, my parents didn’t tell me about that.”

“It was pretty recent; odds are her letter hasn’t reached them yet. Or maybe she’s busy taking care of the little one.”

“Thanks for telling me about this, Ivan,” Ajax said sincerely. Ever since receiving everyone’s praise, he had begun feeling genuine warmth again. And everyone around him was really nice. He couldn’t wait to get to Liyue so he could meet his new cousin and aunt.

That night, when he got back to his room, Ajax began penning a letter to his sister. 

Dear Tonia,

 

I hope you’re doing amazing. I’m on my way to Liyue harbor right now. You’ll never believe how amazing it’s been. Everyone here is so nice and welcoming, and I get to hear so much of their experiences. Ivanovich, another Snezhnayan, has been really friendly to me too. Out of everyone here, I talk to him the most. He’s a merchant in Liyue and he knows our aunt. He told me Auntie Sasha just had a baby, so we have a new cousin! I really hope you get to visit me in Liyue to see them, or that we could come visit you soon. 

 

Stay safe and tell the others that I love them!

 

All the love, 

Your big brother Ajax

Finished, he placed the letter inside his bag. ‘Note to self, find some envelopes for my letters,’ he thought. Finally, he got ready to go to bed and tucked himself in, dreaming of what life in Liyue would look like.

The next day, just as he got up, he heard a knock on his door.

“Kid, we’re almost there. Get ready to go,” a booming voice hollered out.

“Got it, got it,” Ajax scrambled up. He grabbed his things and started packing, managing to fit everything in quickly. As he swung his bag over his shoulder, Ajax looked around his room on board.

‘I’m heading off to Liyue now.’

With that last glance, Ajax swallowed up the melancholic feeling that welled up in his heart. Then, he turned around and walked excitedly to the deck. 

Across the sea, he could spot a tiny strip of brown. ‘It’s land,’ he thought happily. While he enjoyed the journey, there was really only so much he could do onboard. 

As the ship got closer and closer to Liyue, Ajax began hearing new sounds: fishermen calling out to each other, men helping direct boats, and children playing by the harbor. He was bathed in Liyue’s lively atmosphere. It felt as though the place had a life of its own, vastly different from the quiet calm back in Morepsok.

After a short while, the ship finally docked. Grabbing his things tightly, Ajax got ready to go down, but before he could, he heard a voice shouting his name from the harbor. He looked around, hoping to find where it was coming from. 

“Ajax, over here,” a warm voice shouted out.

He turned in the direction it was coming from, seeing an unfamiliar Liyuen man. He stared at him in puzzlement. He pointed to himself, ‘Is he talking to me?’

The man met his eyes and nodded, smiling brightly. Ajax made his way over to the man. He had short brown hair, brown eyes, and seemed to be around his parents’ age.

“Ajax, right?” He asked.

Ajax nodded, unsure of what to say.

The man took his lack of response in stride. “You look just like my wife, so I was sure you were her nephew,” he laughed. “I’m Sasha’s husband by the way. My name is Yijian.”

Once again, Ajax nodded before shyly introducing himself. “Hello, sir. My name is Ajax.”

Yijian gave him a small smile and offered out his hand, “Nice meeting you, Ajax. No need to be so formal, just call me uncle. Do you want to head to our home? Sasha and Lulu, your cousin, are waiting for us. She’s prepared a lot of food to welcome you here.”

Ajax felt his heart warm. It had only been a few moments but he already felt like his aunt and her family accepted him. Ajax took his uncle’s hand.

“Let’s go, uncle. I can’t wait to see Sasha and Lulu!”