Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

                        2015

Robert wasn’t gay, he wasn’t even bi. He just liked what he liked. And sometimes he liked fucking men. Since he was married to a woman he didn’t get to partake as much as he would like. He was a sexual being, so sue him. What his wife Chrissie didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her.

So, when he told her he had a business meeting in London, it was just a little white lie. He has spent years getting to the place he was now. Starting as a mere salesman in Lawrence’s company. Then he met the man’s daughter and that was that. He married her last year, and they had been relatively happy. Robert was still waiting for Lawrence to retire and leave him the company. He had worked hard for it.

Sitges, Spain had been his choice. Usually, a place like that wasn’t his type, but he was feeling himself in a rut. Since a close call with an intern at the company, he hadn’t been with any men lately. Women were fine and he loved their bodies but sometimes, he just wanted a little different.

He didn’t like it was so…gay. The beach and nightlife were touted to be unashamedly gay which made him very uncomfortable. He had prided himself on never even going into a gay club, except once in his youth. It was just the kind of place his father would hate. If he had been rebellious maybe it would have been fun, but it was too loud, too bright, and just too gay.

But what he did like was he was just another nameless face in the mix. No one cared about what he did or who he did. Just as long as everyone was of age and willing, no one batted an eyelash. That’s what he wanted, good old fashioned nameless, dirty sex. What he was looking for was more than multiple one-night stands, he could stay in Leeds if he wanted that. He wanted someone to spend time with in and out of bed.

When Robert booked his hotel online, he picked a less flashy one. No flags, no bright colors and one that promoted a family environment. He wasn’t homophobic, of course he wasn’t, he just knew what he liked, and he didn’t like that.

As he was carrying his bag his fifth-floor room in the best hotel money could afford. With all the amenities like pool, spa, gym, rooftop terrace, children’s play area, reception hall and even an outside banquet area. The hotel restaurant has a three-star Michelin chef as their head chef. Really, he couldn’t imagine a better place to stay.

First thing he was going to do was change and go to the beach. He only had five days here and he wasn’t about to waste one minute. First he would have to ring Chrissie and tell her that he had settled into his hotel in London. A small part of him worried she would try and come to stay too but Lachlan was being a pain, as he’s want to do, so she’d have her hands full.

After he unlocked his door and put his things down on the table, he pulled his mobile out of his pocket. It probably said something about his character that he didn’t feel bad at all about lying to Chrissie or his plans to hook up this week, but he wasn’t a doctor, so he wasn’t about to think too hard on it.

Robert didn’t just book the first room he found; he got the best, because he deserved the best. A king-sized bed, free Wi-Fi- always a must, sea view out of one huge window, and a city view out of the other. He could sit on the balcony and have an early morning brew just watching the tide come in.

He decided to make the call from the balcony; he took a seat in one of the plush sky-blue chairs and felt the sun on his face. It was much better than the cold, dreary weather that England had year-round.

He tapped Chrissie’s name on his mobile and waited for her to answer. He watched as people walked around the beach, jumping in the water. Soon the call connected.

“Oh, I was hoping to video chat, I miss your face,” she said, he could hear the pout in her voice. She was six years older than him you would think she would be over the pouting stage.

“I’m sorry, I’m just exhausted. The drive was long.” When in reality, he drove to Leeds Bradford Airport, flew into Barcelona, and took a taxi to Sitges, it was quite relaxing if he were honest.

“No, I’m sorry. How was the drive?”

“Tedious. But work is work.”

“I hope you’re able to bring in more clients to justify putting you through all of this.”

“I might not but I may, it’s just the nature of the beast. Look, I’m going to shower and see if I can start a little early on the meet and greet.”

“Alright, I love you.”

“I love you too,” he said and then disconnected.

Now to live for five days instead of stagnating in Leeds for the rest of his life.

Putting on his beach wear, shorts, and an opened red floral shirt because he had style. The last thing he did was make sure he had enough sunblock on because he could tell Chrissie he got a tan in sunbed in London but explaining a sunburn would be much harder.

Before he stepped out of the hotel he already had plans with a woman for drinks later. She was cute, not really his type anymore. She reminded him too much of Katie, but she would probably be great bed, Katie was.

He found a perfect spot to people watch. He laid out his beach towel and reapplied his sunblock because it had taken him a while to find such a good spot. His plan was to sun a little and then swim some. Let life happen instead of being pushed in one way or another.

“Hey, Mate, you’re in my spot.”

Robert took his sunglasses off and looked at the man who dared to interrupt his lounging. Robert had to squint a little because the man was right in front of the sun. Of course he would have to find another Brit, and a Yorkshire one from the sound of it.

The man was nice looking, muscles, dark hair and had a nice tan himself. But Robert had made it a thing of honor for himself to be able to pick out the blokes that liked a little different and this was not one.

“No one was here, mate,” Robert said, elongating the word mate.

“That’s my towel,” the man said pointing to a blue and orange towel that Robert had kicked out of the way.

“It was like that when I got here,” he lied.

“Making friends everywhere you go I see,” another man said to the first one that Robert had been talking to.

Where the first one had dark hair and blue eyes, this one had dark hair and dark eyes, he was also a bit tanner than the first one. Not only that, he was just wearing board shorts, the first one was wearing shorts, but they were even longer than the board shorts and he was wearing a black top. Robert had to admit he was a little disappointed, the man looked good, it was a shame he was so covered up.

“He’s in my spot.”

“Chill Aaron, you promised to have fun this week. We’re young, single, and at least I’m hot.”

“You did have all the blokes coming on to you last night,” Aaron, by the sounds of it, said.

“What can I say, I’m just that good looking. If you actually talked to a bloke you could probably hook up. You tried it on with me once, you remember. Even you aren’t immune to him charms.”

“That was before I knew you well.”

“Look, there’s a spot for us,” the second man said.

Robert watched as Aaron picked up his towel walked a few steps away and laid it back out. Really why did he get so worked up when a spot was right there? But Robert did notice the talk about Aaron looking for a bloke. Seemed like Robert was wrong about thinking he was straight. Too bad he was so grumpy, Robert wanted to have fun this week. If he wanted to be dragged down he would have stayed home.

Aaron’s eyes kept straying to the annoying blond man who had stolen his spot.

“I swear, Aaron, you better not be working yourself up to a right state. This is supposed to be fun for us. Vic breaking up with me, then there’s you. The closest thing you’ve had to a boyfriend since Ed was a hookup with Finn. That’s my brother, mate.”

“It was just sex.”

“Didn’t ask. We’re both finally free of prison and being tied down in a relationship. This was supposed to be fun.”

“I am having fun.”

The blond really did thing he was all that, Aaron thought. He was just casually lounging in that ugly shirt that was opened showing his chest. Aaron hated how hot the man looked.

“Earth to Aaron.”

Aaron rolled his eyes. “What?”

“If you’re not going to hook up with anyone tonight, I’m not playing wingman.”

“You never got upset being hit on by men before,” Aaron said, finally taking his eyes away from the blond and looking at Adam.

“I’m not upset but like ten guys chatted you up last night and you turned them all down. Jackson and Ed were really different so I’m not exactly sure what your type is.”

Hearing Jackson’s name still hurt but not as bad as it used to hurt. His heartbreak from Ed was still fresh, even though that was all his fault. He missed his family and took it out on Ed, so of course Ed got tired of Aaron’s dark moods. Who wouldn’t?

“Fine, I’ll be your wingman tonight, we’ll go to one of the straight clubs.”

Adam laughed. “You play wingman? Last time you tried that I got slapped.”

“How was I to know you already slept with her and then ghosted her?”

“We’ll just go to that bar we saw last night. It looked a great mix of both. If we pull, we pull if you don’t, you don’t.”

“Haha.”

Aaron stayed a little bit longer but didn’t want to get in the water with his shirt on and wasn’t about to take it off with as many people around. So, he told Adam he was going to ring his mum and talk to her some.

What was he thinking coming on a beach holiday when he was covered in scars? No one wanted to see them, especially him or any bloke he wanted to bed. Ed had been great, but Aaron could tell they made him uncomfortable. He was never going to find a bloke that didn’t see the scars and recoil even a little.

Living in France for a few years away from his family had been hard. Paddy and his mum were everything to him. He couldn’t believe that it was even possible.

As he walked back to his and Adam’s hotel, the cheapest they could find but still nice, he let his mind wander.

Once upon a time, his mother was the last person he would miss. After years of not even being a blip on her radar, she had done good in the end. He didn’t know what he would have done without her and Hazel when his cutting got the worst it had been. He missed Hazel but they were just keeping each other in this perpetual state of mourning.

“HEY!”

He didn’t want to be this way, he didn’t want to think about Jackson right now. He would never forget him, but he was allowed to have a life after death.

“Would you stop!”

It wasn’t like he didn’t miss Jackson; he did every day of every week of every month of every year but locking himself away was the last thing Jackson wanted.

“I’m talking to you.”

A hand landed on his shoulder, kicking in Aaron’s fight reflex. He grabbed the hand, twisted it as he turned around.

“Owe, I was just trying to get your attention.”

It was the blond spot stealer.

“What do you want?” Aaron asked, letting go the bloke’s hand. The man rubbed his hand but didn’t look cross just a little surprised.

“I was wondering if you’d like to go out for a drink tonight?”

“What? No.”

The man looked taken aback. “You’re not even going to think about it?”

“If you’re going to try to pull, you might want to take your wedding ring off first.”

The man looked at his ring and back at Aaron. “I just got divorced. That’s what this week is about. Trying to pick up the pieces of my life again. I haven’t been able to take it off yet.”

Teenage Aaron would have fallen for that crock of lies so fast his head would spin. But he was far from the boy who just wanted a nice-looking bloke to look at him twice.

Aaron laughed. “Try that on someone who hasn’t seen your type before. When you get back home to your husband or wife, I really don’t care which, I won’t have you on my conscience.”

“Fine, I’m not divorced but it doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun.”

“By fun you mean sex?” Aaron asked.

“Yeah.”

Just a moment ago Aaron was thinking about not wanting to take his shirt off to swim. If you looked at his arms you could see the scars but usually others didn’t put two to two together there. He could just be very clumsy at manual labor. His chest and his stomach were a different story, men didn’t need him to tell them why the scars were there, they could figure it out.

But he would never see this bloke again, it could be fun and over with. He’d had one-night stands before, Finn being his latest.

“Sure, why not,” he said, hoping not to regret his decision.

Their first night together, they didn’t leave Robert’s suite. They had decided early on, no last names. Robert was handsome, suave, and so narcissistic it wasn’t even funny. Aaron had heard him on his mobile to his wife a few times. Guilt ate at him, but Robert was going to cheat anyway, it wasn’t like if Aaron turned him down he wouldn’t.

The next night, Aaron turned Adam down on going out to stay with Robert. They didn’t just have sex, they talked. Nothing too telling about their lives. Aaron didn’t want to know too much, he didn’t want to think about Robert’s wife at home and maybe even kids. Aaron hated cheating, it ruined lives. He almost never had Paddy in his life because his mum cheated on Paddy with Carl. Paddy had kicked him out and it almost ruined everything. He loved his mum, but Paddy was the only one that had always been there for him, even when he hated him.

You could say that cheating and Aaron were not friends. So why was he at this very moment in bed with a married man?

“Where do you live?” Aaron couldn’t help but ask. He was tracing his fingers down Robert’s chest. Aaron still had his top on, but Robert had already seen why before and hadn’t said anything about it. But Aaron had seen him look.

“I thought we weren’t doing that. No last names, not identifying information,” Robert said, grabbing Aaron’s hand and pushing him on his back, hovering over him.

This move was not one he usually enjoyed. Being pinned down was his idea of a nightmare but something about Robert made it…enjoyable.

The week passed by fastest than he wanted. Adam complained about his mystery man, but Aaron wouldn’t tell him anything. All he wanted was to spend as much time as possible with Robert. They hadn’t even exchanged numbers. So, on Aaron and Adam’s last day, he felt his heart breaking. He had told himself it was just a fling; Robert had told him but here he wasn’t holding onto a sleeping Robert like his life depended on it. Looking at the clock, he knew it was time to leave, or he would miss his flight. He kissed Robert on the cheek and got out of bed and dressed. Robert had been clear, no numbers or last names. So instead, Aaron wrote “Same time next year?” and left.

Robert knew Aaron was gone as soon as he woke up. The room felt emptier than it had all week. They had spent so much time together Robert’s heart ached when he realized he hadn’t got to say goodbye. Why hadn’t Aaron woken him? No, he knew why, Aaron had gotten attached, leaving like that was the best for them both. Robert still had one more night in Spain and was going to make the best of it, even though he would miss Aaron. As he walked to the balcony, he saw a note written on the hotel’s stationery. “Same time next year?”

That Robert could do; he just hoped that Aaron wouldn’t bring his mate Adam next year. He wanted him all to himself.

On the next chapter

  2016

Robert checked into his hotel, in fact, he checked into the very room he had last year. He spent so much time in the lobby watching people walk in and out. Happy families. Couples in love. Mates on holiday. A few stag dos and hen dos. Finally, he saw him.

Aaron.

Only Aaron could walk into a five-star luxury hotel in a black hoodie and look good doing it. Robert got up and made his way for him.

“Hey stranger,” he said, when he got close before Aaron saw him.

“Robert,” Aaron said and if he weren’t mistaken, he said his name a little breathlessly.

Chapter Text

2016

Robert checked into his hotel, in fact, he checked into the very room he had last year. He spent so much time in the lobby watching people walk in and out. Happy families. Couples in love. Mates on holiday. A few stag dos and hen dos. Finally, he saw him.

Aaron.

Only Aaron could walk into a five-star luxury hotel in a black hoodie and look good doing it. Robert got up and made his way for him.

“Hey stranger,” he said, when he got close before Aaron saw him.

“Robert,” Aaron said and if he weren’t mistaken, he said his name a little breathlessly.

“I wasn’t sure you’d actually show up,” Robert said honestly.

“I almost wasn’t able to; I had to do some shifting things around to afford this holiday.”

“Lucky you, I can take care of you for the whole week.”

Aaron’s expression darkened. “I can take care of myself.”

Robert forgot how prickly he could be. “I didn’t say you couldn’t. Have you gotten a hotel room yet?”

Now Aaron looked embarrassed. “I didn’t want to spend the money if you weren’t here, so I was coming to see first.”

“Save your money and stay with me.”

“Rob,” Aaron warned.

“It for convenience not pity. What happened between last year and this year? You seem more on edge.”

“That sounds like a private life question. We don’t do that. Let’s go back to your room.”

“That’s what I like to hear.” Except he did want to know what was going on with Aaron.

After getting reacquainted…twice. They were relaxing on the balcony. Robert had requested a patio daybed to be put on the balcony. His room had one of the biggest balconies and deserved somewhere he could lounge with Aaron. It was funny, he requested it not even thinking about having someone else share the room or balcony with him.

They were lounging on the daybed together, looking out on the Spanish paradise they had escaped to. And Robert really needed it this year, even more than last. Lachlan was getting more out of control. Chrissie was getting more neurotic about what to do. Lawrence was holding control over the company just out of Robert’s reach. Then there was Diane. She was sick, they think they caught it time but who knows. It would have been better if it was caught earlier then her treatment wouldn’t have to be so extreme. Victoria was trying to guilt him to come back the village to visit. He hadn’t stepped foot in that place since his father’s funeral. Not that they knew that he had watched it knowing they wouldn’t want him there.

“Robert.”

Aaron was rubbing Robert’s jaw, looking at him with concern.

“Soz, was a million miles away.”

“Anything I can help with?”

Aaron looked so genuine that it made his cold heart ache. For all the tough lad bravado that Aaron puts on, he’s very kind and caring. When he first met him he thought he was someone completely different than who he is. Not that he’s not tough, he is, Robert watched Aaron get in the face of a bouncer twice his size their last night the previous year.

“This helps,” Robert told him, putting his arm around him. It was corny and it wasn’t the type of relationship he had ever had with a man before; it was all quick hookups but this…felt different…was different. “Adam didn’t give you a problem about coming here without him?”

“Nah, he’s back with his girlfriend. They break up and get back together a lot.”

“Sounds like my sister and her boyfriend. I’ve only heard about him, but I don’t think it’s very stable.”

Aaron turned his head and looked at Robert. “So, you have a sister. Younger or older?”

“Our agreement,” Robert said.

“I’m just asking older or younger, not her name or anything like that. I’ll share that I have a little sister. I haven’t seen her in a long time.”

Robert sighed. “Younger, I don’t see her much, only when she comes to visit me. I refuse to go back to the village I grew up in.”

“Why?”

“Now that is personal. Come on, let’s get dressed and go find something to do.”

Aaron couldn’t remember the last time he had so much fun. Things in the village had been horrible lately. His father was back in the village sniffing around his mother. He couldn’t say a thing about it; he just had to watch it happen. He thought about running away to stay with Ed, but he couldn’t leave her with him. She didn’t know what kind of monster he was; he had to protect her even if she thought he was some kind of saint. She did end up kicking Aaron out, and now he lived in Victoria’s box room. Here he was pretending to be an adult and still having to live off of someone else. He paid her rent but without her he wouldn’t have a place to live.

He was just lucky him and Adam had the scrapyard. It was hard in the beginning but after a few false starts, everything worked out. In fact, it wouldn’t have happened at all if Vic hadn’t borrowed money from her absentee brother. She had told him it was for cooking school. They felt bad for taking it but now with their profit, she was going to be able to go now, just a year later than her brother thought.

Now it was halfway through their week, and Aaron was already missing this time they had. Everyone back home was asking when he was going to start dating but he had no plans to do that. He knew he and Robert weren’t a thing, but he wasn’t built to have multiple relationships at the same time. Even if one was only in his own head.

He was out on the balcony reading when Robert got back. Alright, maybe reading was a stretch, more like he was on the local Facebook page for Emmerdale, keeping up with the goings on. Someone had fixed Cain’s mobile, and he was now arguing on the community page with Jimmy about the garage losing Kings Haulage account. Harriet was trying to get more people to come into church besides holidays and post getting arrested. His mum was gushing about Gordon and Aaron thought he would be sick. He turned his mobile off after that.

“Look what I got you,” Robert said, carrying in a suspiciously large shopping bag.

“I didn’t ask for anything,” Aaron said, standing up and walking back inside.

“That’s why it’s a gift.”

Aaron eyed the large bag. It was too large for anything that he would be able to get into his suitcase. And he wasn’t about to spend a small fortune just to add it.

But then Robert pulled the mystery gift out of the bag and Aaron got it. He couldn’t wipe the smile off of his face.

“Lifejackets. You’re crazy if you think I’m going with you. I already told you if you want to risk your life parasailing, that’s all on you.”

“Come on, live a little.”

That was how he found himself holding on to dear life. He could see Robert in the boat laughing his fool head off. A part of him remembered Jackson and skydiving. Aaron had chickened out but not Jackson. Aaron still remembered how big he smiled.

Before he could force himself not to dwell on things better left alone, Aaron heard something snap. The tow line, the thing the man who hooked him up to all this said would never break.

“Fuck,” was the last thing he remembered saying before the panic took over and his mind shut off.

“Still mad?” Robert asked, later that night.

“Why in the world would I be mad?” Aaron asked, clenching his teeth.

Robert tried to smile. “Sounds like you’re a little mad.”

“Seventeen minutes. That’s how long I was in the air untethered to ANYTHING.”

“You floated a while and went into the water very gently. It wasn’t like it was storming or anything where you thrown around. I think you’re making a bit of a thing of it that is wasn’t.”

“Then why didn’t you go after me? He said he had a brand-new tow line.”

“Well, wasn’t safe was it?”

They did not have sex that night. In fact, they did not even talk after that. Half because Aaron was still angry and half because Robert could tell he was embarrassed.

“We only have one more full day together, please don’t spend it angry,” Robert told him the next day.

Aaron sighed and Robert knew he had won. “I guess you’re right. After this we won’t see each other again.”

A dagger to his heart would have been less painful, Robert thought.

“You don’t want to do this again?” he asked.

Blue eyes stared back at him. Robert wasn’t sure what Aaron was looking for in his face but apparently he found it.

“I would. Same time next year?”

2017

Aaron paced the hotel lobby; he looked shabby next to the posh clothes and pearly white smiles. He had just assumed Robert would be there first; he was last time. Aaron couldn’t even ask the front desk because he didn’t know Robert’s last name.

Aaron’s mobile pinged with a text. He looked and saw it was his mum, begging for forgiveness. It wasn’t something he was ready to do yet. Everything came out, secrets usually do. He had kept it quiet since he was eight years old and then his mum telling him she was pregnant, made him realize he couldn’t keep quiet any longer. He found out that Sandra ran off with Liv soon after he was kicked out. Sandra had to know what he was or at least guessed it. Why else would she change her name and go into hiding with Liv?

But his mum still thought Gordon was perfect. He broke down one night with the help of Diane’s strongest whiskey and told his mum everything. Later she said she lost the baby, that she was too old and things like that happen, but he had seen the aftercare paperwork. He couldn’t blame her for not wanting to have his child…again.

Things between them were shaky at best. This holiday was a perfect distraction. His father was dead now, took his own life in a prison cell. Gordon had wrote him a letter, but Aaron never got to read it, his mother burned it then his father ended his life. Now Aaron would never get to ask him why he did it. The adult in him knows it was something broken in his father, but the little boy who cowered in his bed while a monster descended on him, would never understand that.

Aaron shook off those horrible, lingering thoughts. He wanted freedom, he wanted to be somewhere where no one knew what happened to him. Where he couldn’t hear whispers or pitying glances. Here he was just another face in the crowd.

“Sir, if you’re not checking in, I really do have to ask you to leave.”

Aaron saw it was the hotel manager, he had seen the man a few times last year. He must really be freaking people out if they had the big boss come to kick him out.

“We have a room, thank you very much,” Robert’s voice said from behind him.

Aaron turned as he saw Robert, who was sporting a healing black eye. He was still gorgeous, but he looked a little rougher than his usual coifed self. The manager gave Aaron a tight smile and nodded to Robert before leaving.

“How long have you been here?” Robert asked.

“Few minutes,” Aaron lied, it had been more like six hours. No wonder the manager was starting to get a little testy.

“Let’s go to our room, I need to shower, I feel disgusting.”

“Our room?” Aaron said to himself after Robert turned and walked away.

It was times like this, Aaron knew he had fucked up his life because just that little domesticity from Robert sent his heart beating faster. This year had been hell, and he never thought about dating anyone but if he did, it would be with Robert, a married man he knew almost nothing about. What did that say about him?

Aaron wasn’t surprised when Robert led him to their usual room. When Robert went to shower, Aaron went to sit on the balcony. He noticed right away the daybed was gone and it made him a little sad, those moments in Robert’s arms watching the sun set were some of his best memories.

He loved the feel of the sun on his face. Home had been extremely dreary in the past few weeks. If that was because how he felt or the weather he wasn’t sure, but he knew he felt that dreariness in his bones.

Robert’s mobile rang while he was in the shower. Going back inside the room, Aaron looked at the caller ID. The name Rebecca was splashed across it. Aaron didn’t know many things about Robert, but he had heard him speaking to his wife a few times and knew her name was Chrissie. So, who was Rebecca and why was she calling him?

When it stopped ringing, he went to move but a text popped up. He read it before the screen went dark and locked again.

Rebecca- You can pretend this baby isn’t yours, but it won’t stop anything. Tell her or I will.

Baby? Robert was having a baby with someone that wasn’t his wife. Aaron didn’t know why that made him so angry. He knew Robert cheated on his wife; they were proof of that. Maybe because this felt like he was cheating on him.

“What are you doing?”

Aaron hadn’t even noticed the shower being turned off.

“Nothing.”

“You were looking at my mobile.”

“You just got a text; I wanted to see if it was Chrissie.”

“And why would that be any of your business?”

Nope, he just wasn’t in the right headspace for this. After everything at home, this was supposed to be his time away from all the crap in his life.

“I’m going for a walk,” Aaron said, he felt his heart dying.

Robert watched Aaron leave the room looking like someone kicked him. Did he feel bad about that? Maybe a little but Aaron didn’t know all the messed-up things in his life right now. Aaron had this perfect little life that he got away from for one week a year while Robert’s life was imploding.

When Rebecca told him she was pregnant, he felt sick. But he thought she was going to get rid of it, neither wanted to hurt Chrissie. Then suddenly Rebecca wanted the baby, and she was going to do it alone. He didn’t care as long as she left him out of it. He thought that was the plan until Rebecca said she couldn’t lie to her sister anymore. That Chrissie had a right to know what kind of man he was. After that conversation he started mouthing off to a bloke in a pub and he wasn’t one to suffer fools lightly. At least his black eye was almost completely healed.

Running a hand down his face he tried to compose himself. He needed Aaron. Was it love? No but having Aaron around made everything better. The bad things didn’t look so bad, and the good things looked better. He quickly dressed and went in search for his wayward lover.

It didn’t take him long to find him; Aaron was sitting on a chair in the lobby just staring out into space.

“Look, I’m sorry. I’m a little on edge lately.”

Aaron looked at him and Robert realized that Aaron had tears in his eyes.

“I just wanted one thing…one thing to not be shit in my life. But I guess that was too much to ask for.”

Robert was starting to realize that Aaron’s life may not be the perfect one he thought it was. Aaron never complained about his life but then again, Robert made sure they stuck to their rules about privacy and keeping this life separate from their real ones.

But how naïve could Robert really be? Aaron’s chest, stomach and arms were covered in silvery scars. It was just something they didn’t talk about, along with a million other things. Like why Robert wanted to keep this division in their real lives and this one. Before he thought maybe it was because he didn’t want Aaron ruining the life he had worked so hard for but now it was because he didn’t want Aaron to see the real Robert Sugden and run for the hills.

“I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to mess everything up. I messed up and got Chrissie’s sister pregnant. She’s threatening to tell Chrissie.”

“Christ, Robert what the hell?”

“I know. I know I deserve all the bad coming my way.”

“I didn’t say that. But Rob, maybe coming here when everything is falling apart in your life wasn’t the best choice.”

Robert needed to be honest, or he would probably lose Aaron.

“I had to see you. I had to be with you. Chrissie, Rebecca, and everyone else don’t hold a candle to you.”

“You barely know me, you don’t have to lie, I’m not some woman that needs all that.”

Robert was hurt, he was actually being real, but he could see why Aaron thought it was all lies.

“Why don’t we amend our agreement. We stick to no phone numbers or last names, but we share what’s going on in our lives, what we are comfortable with.”

“Really?” Aaron looked so hopeful it hurt Robert.

“Yes. I’ll start; I have biological half siblings that I haven’t had any relationship with. But I just really only have a brother and sister. My brother was adopted, and my sister is technically my half-sister, but I considered her mother mine.”

“I just have a little half sister but just like I said before I haven’t seen her in a long time.”

“Why is that?”

Aaron hesitated. “My father kicked me out when I was young, I moved in with my mum. My stepmum ran off with my little sister not long after I was kicked out. Turns out when I wasn’t there for him to take his anger out on she started to worry about my sister. I’m glad she left and hid, he’s a monster.”

Aaron’s expression was screaming, “I do not want to talk about this.”

“Hey, why don’t we go walking on the beach,” Robert suggested. “First put on beach clothes, you’ll die of heat stroke with that hoodie on.”

Aaron smiled faintly. “Fine.”

2018

Robert glared at the clerk. “I always get room 512.”

“I’m sorry sir, but that room has been booked already.”

“But I asked for it specifically when I made the reservation.”

“529 is just as good.”

“The view is different; I wanted my view.”

“How about 412?”

“How about no. How about getting my room?”