Chapter Text
Somewhere in Hell’s ring of Wrath there was a courtroom. It was giant and ornate, filled with fiery braziers and the smell of ash and lava rising from the molten floor far below any of the platforms meant for people.
The thrones for the pantheon of sin were anchored to the far back wall of the room, looking ever imposingly over whatever poor helldweller had overstepped enough to warrant being dragged to this place.
The throne at the top, Pride’s, was empty. Even when none of the others were filled its emptiness was apparent and emphasised. Cobwebs creeping up the back of the chair from the seat, a truly impressive amount of dust, and a note falsely assuring that its owner would be back soon.
Lucifer, the king of Hell, the sin of Pride, was famous among his fellow sins for shirking his responsibilities to hell and simply entertaining himself with whatever he saw fit. Truthfully they could not particularly blame him thinking himself above it all, he was perhaps the one to indulge in his sin most publicly. It was impressive in all honesty, put them all to shame in a way.
But in his absence, Hell’s Courtroom needed a judge. And Lucifer selected Satan, king of Wrath as that judge. Some might have called it an unwise choice, but who better than he? After all the courtroom was built in wrath for a reason.
And so, in response to the news of his new role to fill, the sins did what they did best.
“Uh.. a party Mammon sir?” Asked the small Jester. Fizzarolli was an imp, one of the servants of hell, the lowest class alongside hellhounds. Fizzarolli was truthfully a very curious case, a performer that was steadily becoming incredibly popular throughout the rings of hell, to the point of even rivalling stars like Verosika Mayday.
And Fizz knew that. He was an absolutely incredible performer, always had been. You seemingly get a taste for it growing up in the circus. He knew that that was what caught him Mammon’s attention in the first place, but he also knew that he would not have stood a chance at becoming nearly as successful without the platform that the sin had placed him on.
It was for that reason, knowing just how small he was in comparison to Mammon, that was terrifying him so much about what he had just said. A party was being held among the sins to celebrate Satan’s “promotion” as Mammon put it, and apparently a few of them had decided to bring some of their favourite underlings.
Which apparently, included Fizz
”Yeah! A party! That bitch Beelzebub is a fucking #### but I ain’t missin out on this one Fizzy! There’s no way she ain’t breakin out the good shit for this.”
Fizz stood there shaking just slightly as Mammon lounged on a large sofa in the room he had just called Fizz into moments ago.
”But- .. Mammon sir, why are you asking me to come?”
Mammon laughed sharply at that,
”I ain’t asking you to come Fizz. I’m telling you you’re coming. That dog bitch said she’s bringing one of her pets and the man of the hour just got himself a little assistant that he’s bringing, no way am I showing up empty handed like some of the other losers there.”
Fizz gulped, he was trying not to shake at the idea of being in the same room as all the other sins, paraded around like some sort of toy when if he was one he’d be severely broken.… He was severely broken.
His body ached, he’d only recently finished practice and was still adjusting to his most recent prosthetics. They were cheap and stiff and didn’t fit comfortably against his body, even now standing still he could feel them slowly chafing. He was used to this low quality at this point and knew he should be grateful, Mammon was the one who paid for his care and he was the sin of Greed. It was unbelievably charitable that Fizz hadn’t just been thrown away immediately after the accident.
He couldn’t do this. He absolutely couldn’t do this. He wasn’t even really worthy of being in the presence of one sin, let alone all of them!
”S-sir” Mammon glanced to Fizz, a bored expression on his face, “Are you sure you can’t, uh, take somebody else?” Mammon’s eyes narrowed and his face soured. Fizz panicked, “Not - not that I’m ungrateful! I’m very uh very flattered you want to bring me- but I- it’s not like I’m much to show off and you-“
Mammon leaned over, grabbing Fizz and lifting him into the air. From the outside it probably looked somewhat endearing, like it was meant to be reassuring. It didn’t feel like that. Fizz felt helpless and small when Mammon did this, like a child being picked up by a stranger.
”Aw come on Fizzy! Just do this one thing for me ok? You’re my rising star I gotta show you off to my buddies! They’ll love you don’t even worry about it!” He dropped Fizz back to the floor and the fake ankle of his leg clicked unnaturally and he dropped onto his ass in an uncoordinated tumble. Mammon paid no mind to this, “Now go get your shit together! You gotta be ready when we head out!”
Fizz let out a small sigh and breathed deeply to gather himself,
”.. Yes sir. Um, when is the party?”
”Eh, like.. a couple hours?”
”A COUPLE OF HOURS?!”
The party began late into the night when the sins had mostly arrived. They were still waiting on a couple of them like Belphagor, (what do you expect from the sin of sloth?) and Mammon, (what do you expect from such an asshole?).
The majority of them were already there though, Leviathan and Beelzebub were chatting over some Beelzejuice, both of whom had already congratulated Satan on his promotion. Then again, Bee had gathered them all together in the first place which was a fairly big congrats in general.
Asmodeus had been somewhat late, ‘fashionably I hope’ in his words, and spotted Satan just a small ways away from the girls,
“Sataaan~” Ozzie greeted cheerfully, strolling over and patting Satan’s shoulder,
“Congrats baby, how are things?”
Satan had been more distant since picking up the new job, which was to be expected of course he was a lot busier now but it never hurt to check in.
The dragon-like demon sighed,
”It’s.. busy.”
”.. is that bad?”
”No not at all, it’s been fulfilling being able to actually get shit done around here without having to wait on that pathetic feathery eyesore to give the order.” As he thought about Lucifer smoke started to come out of his mouth and nostrils. Suddenly a small demon that Asmodeus didn’t recognise flew up beside Satan and gently placed a hand on the giant draconic demon’s.
”Um, Satan Sir, remember what our horoscopes said this morning? Today is a day of celebration! We can’t taint it with our negative energies remember? Try to take deep breaths”
Ozzie winced, fully expecting Satan to slap the other demon across the room. To his shock though, the demon began to breathe steadier and the smoke dissipated.
”Right right yeah” he said tiredly, after a moment lifting a hand and gently playing with the fire from the candle atop the tiny flying demon’s head. They let out a small chittering laugh and apparently it was infectious as Satan gently smiled and let out a quiet chuckle.
Ozzie watched the two in slight disbelief. An odd, uncomfortable feeling twisted somewhere in Ozzie’s gut the way it always did when he saw some sort of pda. He forced his grin wider keeping his usual charming persona on,
”Oh? Who’s this adorable little thing?”
The small floating hell born turned to Ozzie as Satan did. His fellow sin cleared his throat,
”Right. Ozz, this is Yogirt. They’re my advisor.”
Advisor? Uhuh, yeah sure let’s pretend that that was normal behaviour for someone to have with one of their subjects. Yogirt bowed to Ozzie and smiled brightly at him. The sin of lust held his hand outward and despite his momentary surprise, Yogirt placed his hand in Ozz’s.
”A pleasure little one~” Ozzie kissed the back of his hand and released him. Yogirt giggled slightly,
”Thank you my lord” well weren’t they just a little ray of sunshine? Ozzie looked up and flinched slightly to see the sharp glare Satan had fixed him with. Yeah they were definitely not just his advisor. Laughing good-naturedly, Asmodeus raised his hands in surrender - he really didn’t mean anything by it, he just fancied himself a little showmanship.
He quickly excused himself and walked away from the other two. He didn’t want to seem bitter or anything and give them “negative energy” as Yogirt so eloquently put it - but the sin could not stand being around couples in any form other than attending one of his clubs.
He knew the reasoning behind it was entirely selfish and he knew it was immature, but it was unbelievably irritating to see others so easily indulge in what he would never have.
No. Shut up Ozz. Tonight was a celebration. Go treat yourself.
He sidled up to Bee and Levy, both of whom crowded around the drinks, giggling in a slightly concerning way.
”Do I hear the sounds of mischief happening?” Ozzie teased as he approached them. The two girls whirled around still grinning. Beelzebub spoke first,
”Of course not honey! How you been! When’d you get here I didn’t see you come in?”
”A couple minutes ago, though I guess the two of you were a little..” he looked to see that some of the drinks were a slightly different colour, “.. preoccupied”
Levvy gasped over dramatically, one of her heads calling out that,
”Hey is it such a crime to simply be around drinks-“
her other head ratted them out,
”Careful they spiked them”
“YOU FUCKING SNITCH.”
Bee and Ozzie watched in amusement as Leviathan began to argue with her better half as she often did. It never got less amusing. The sin of Lust picked up a glass tentatively from the table and watched as Gluttony’s face pulled into a delighted smile.
“I’m almost afraid to ask what’ll happen to me when I drink this with you looking at me like that.” Ozzie joked. Bee let out a small laugh before picking up two glasses, placing them both to her lips and then tilting her head back, downing them both at once.
“Nothing we can’t handle!” She cackled, despite the now noticeable sway in her posture and the emerging slurring of her voice.
“How many of those have you had?” Ozz asked, gingerly removing her cup from her hand. Bee floated up and flicked his face playfully where his nose would have been if he had one. As she did so though, a hellhound with grey fur, taller than Bee in her casual form but only by a short way approached them.
“Honeybee, you think you can take a lil break from partying for a sec I gotta check somethin”
Honeybee?? Asmodeus felt himself squinting at the hellhound, trying to recall if he’d seen them before- surely if they were that close Bee would have introduced him, they were probably the closest of the sins. Then suddenly she flew back down to the floor and planted a kiss on the hellhound’s forehead, they responded with a throaty laugh and running their hand through Bee’s hair.
Oh.. they were also together?
How many of his fellow sins had found partners and not told him? Levi certainly didn’t seem to pay much mind to the two hellhounds. Did nobody think to tell him anything anymore? Asmodeus had always told the others when he had acquired a partner in the past.
… then again those relationships always turned out mostly the same..
And why would his fellow sins feel the need to let him know unless they needed sex advice or something-
Oh my fucking hell Ozz get a grip.
The sin of lust shook his head gently, kneading the space between his eyebrows before chugging several of the almost certainly spiked drinks. He needed to relax. Whatever was wrong with him today needed to stop.
When he finally tuned back into whatever conversation the two hellhounds were having (thankfully they weren’t flirting) Ozzie felt very lost. Bee had a baffled expression and the grey-furred one was simply shrugging,
“I figured you’d know” they said simply, seemingly replying to Bee.
“But Mammon?!”
“As far as I can tell it isn’t anything romantic”
Ozz choked on his drink. ‘Mammon’ and ‘romance’ should not be within 1000 words of each other. They should have a fucking restraining order. As he hacked he accidentally drew the attention of the other two,
“Pardon?” Asmodeus chose to say, he needed to know what this conversation was about immediately. “Sorry what were you two saying? I wasn’t listening properly”
The taller of the two opened their mouth to speak but Bee beat them to it,
“Mammon’s bringing a plus one!” She yelled in disbelief. And disbelief was the correct response because who in their right mind would want to go anywhere with Mammon?! Ozzie turned to Bee’s partner for some sort of explanation, to which they shrugged helplessly,
“I don’t know what to tell you man, security just rang and said he just arrived and had someone with him. Didn’t sound like a partner or anything like what Bee seems to think-“
“Then what else would they be?!” The smaller of the two sins demanded, far more distressed than necessary (oh yeah whatever she put in those drinks seemed to be properly kicking in, yay). The hellhounds sighed at her, endeared, and said,
“Apparently they had like a jester getup or something. Probably one of his performers or something”
Yikes. Ozz pities the poor soul, the ones Mammon towed around everywhere with him always seemed so miserable. As he considered, he turned his cup around slightly and watched the liquid in it move. He tapped Bee’s shoulder,
“Hey, if a regular hell born drank this how drunk would they get?”
Bee snorted,
“A lot- like a lot a lot” as she spoke she giggled to herself and leant against the table, “Don’t worry though! No hangover necessary! Thassa Beeseealbub guarantee!”
It was true, Ozz had no clue how she did it but somehow her specific Beezlejuice recipe never resulted in a hangover no matter how much you drank. It was incredible.
Ozzie considered whatever poor thing Mammon had dragged with him to this party, he would be sure to offer them a drink when they got here. Lucifer knows they’ll need it if they’ll be sticking next to that green twat all evening.
Speaking of who, a door slammed open
“OI! What’s up you blood ####s?!”