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Why would Chuuya agree to this? This is disgusting, horrible, bad.
His hands are shaking as he removes Dazai's clothing, the brunette is just comforting him while he does this and the tears are blurring his vision.
Dazai wants this and Chuuya is the perfect candidate to execute this. He's even mention being cannibalized instead of committing suicide when he was in the Port Mafia.
But the best thing about this? They both get to die together. He eats and kills himself. The gun is fully loaded, the axe is right there, and he'll follow Dazai straight into Hell— where they both belong.
Maybe he can light this warehouse on fire before shooting himself too.
He's unsure about that part still.
It starts with his fingers. Chuuya uses his pocket knife to cut off his middle and ring finger, afterwards which he licks at the blood dripping from the carvings. It's disgusting and Chuuya threw up in his mouth which ended up dripping onto Dazai's leg and coating his none existent fingers with disgusting throw up.
“I didn't think I tasted that bad,” The dumb mackerel joked, but Chuuya could hear the slight pain in his voice. He's been shot and stabbed before, been punched and kicked, this is fucking nothing.
“Shut up..”
His stomach hurts, he swallowed small chunks of skin and flesh from his old partner. It's so bad, it tastes horrible..
But god he loves it.
He loves that it's for Dazai. It's not a random person, he knows and trusts Dazai. He always has even though he shouldn't.
That waste of bandages? He has better things to care about, he betrayed the Port Mafia and yet Chuuya knows why; for Oda. He wanted a better life so he got one.
He left Chuuya behind.
That was a good decision. He focused better on everything. He didn't need to listen to his suicide ramblings or how much he hates him.
So why is he acting like a fucking baby?
He's seen the scars on Dazai before, they aren't new. He's cleaned them before when Dazai couldn't do it himself, he bought new bandages when he was running low, he did so much for that mackerel.
He's kissing them, cutting the skin and then himself. The punishment he deserves for agreeing— wanting to do this.
“These are new and becoming infected, dumbass.”
“Why clean them when you agreed to do this anyway?”
And Chuuya just tugs his hair so he can shut the fuck up. He can't stand to hear his voice. It makes him choke on non existent sobs.
Now, he just has to lick the blood and tear the skin off. He's tore is own skin off before, it's not that difficult.
It's not difficult anymore when Dazai pulls him back and ends up breaking the skin and leaving teeth marks.
It's not difficult when he begins gnawing at it— the beauty of his scarred pale skin leaking crimson now and oh it's so beautiful.
He has to pull away to look at his creation. He's done so much and he doesn't even know how much time has passed.
Time will forever stop soon. He looks forward to that the most.
He decided to go for the infected scars on the back of his arm, licking and kissing them like he did with the old scars before grabbing his pocket knife and stabbing his shoulder like he would with a nice juicy steak.
He shaking grabs the axe and doesn't even make eye contact, he turns his head away and hopes it cut off that arm.
That scream that echos through the warehouse? Perfect. He doesn't like when people scream, in fact he doesn't like loud noises most times. But this? He could get used to it. Not to mention, Dazai being in pain is something he sometimes enjoy.
It takes awhile, but he has cut up the arm into small pieces to eat so he doesn't throw it all up immediately.
He's numb he thinks. He's chewing slow and swallowing just as slow as if he's eating the best dish in Yokohama.
He can't think of the best dish though. It's so blurry, all he can think about is eating the arm he's cut up and the way it's getting stuck between his teeth and how much blood Dazai is losing.
His stomach is beautiful when he carves a beautiful straight line from his chest to his belly button. For once, he sees tears forming in Dazai's pretty eyes.
“I wonder when's the last time you cried,” Chuuya licked away the tears before licking down to taste the blood dripping down.
“Nineteen years ago, just like every toddler and infant,” He said, choking on his words as the axe cuts off his legs.
Dazai wanted a painless death, cannibalism would be painful but it seems less painful when it's by his partner.
Maybe it's just deathly love, but he loves how beautiful Chuuya looks when he's crying still even though he could've punched him and screamed at him.
Yet he didn't.
He agreed to this.
Chuuya devoted his life to The Flags and the Port Mafia and The Sheep, he even devoted his life to Dazai. He trusted Dazai to save him.
He can hear the bones cracking as he presses down and breaks them like they're a punching bag and not part of a human (even though said human doesn't consider himself human).
His head is pounding, his eyes are closing from the blood. He can barely speak, yet he's still smiling through it all as if this was planned. A way to die with the man he fucking loves. He loved this man since they were only fifteen.
He never stopped loving or thinking of Chuuya for those seven years. It's amazing how easy it is for him to love, but he hates the feeling.
“I love you, Chuuya.”
The last thing Chuuya will ever hear from him again.
His nails are digging into his bleeding shoulders— flesh in his finger nails that he constantly bites when they get too long for his liking.
He can't make time stop, he can only manipulate gravity. Damn that stupid lab, his fucking creators.
He found love despite never feeling it in his artificial heart. He can't eat anything of his mackerel anymore, the metallic taste on his tastebuds are lingering, the acid reflux finally working it's way out.
It's a mess.
There's blood, flesh, bones and vomit. The odor must smell horrendous. The gurgling noises he makes from holding it back but finally releasing all of it on his chest.
Blood and vomit mixed together, a pounding migraine. His vision blurry from tears and his head is spinning.
Corruption feels better than this and he hates Corruption.
He can die from Corruption, yet he never has before. He can take out the entire world with Corruption if he doesn't get stopped.
Oh how pretty it would be to have the entire population sucked into a black hole. But he cares too much about it.
Now? He has no reason to care.
Now, there's only three things to do.
First, he uses For The Tainted Sorrow to spread the gasoline. He's drenched in it and it's so disgusting he has to take off his clothes just to avoid the stickiness.
Second, he lights the place on fire. Smoke fills up his lungs in no time, he's sweating and shakily grabbing the gun.
Third, he puts it up to his head and shoots himself.
But not before saying,
“I love you too, Osamu.”
The fire engulfs the two, lying dead next to each other. It's pretty, it's so beautiful how this little love story could end.
Their hatred? Just pent up love.
Love that they never knew how to properly feel or show. Mori abused it out of Dazai and not having a life until he was eight forced it away from Chuuya.
Chuuya doesn't need to breathe anymore, he doesn't need to think anymore. He can rest finally, he's never been suicidal but this certainly made him.
Dazai being the only thing he could truly feel love for. The Sheep and The Flags helped, his brother certainly helped.
But he was connected to Dazai. Connected in a way he never felt.
At least, that's how Chuuya would feel. He'll never know how Dazai would feel.
Ever.