Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Setting: late afternoon at Eden Academy, during a free period. The group is hanging out near the greenhouse courtyard, a common place for students to chill during a break.

The sun slanted low through the courtyard's tall glass walls, casting golden light over the group sprawled across benches and stone steps. Winter had just started backing off, and the warmth was just enough to sit outside without freezing. Birds chirped, someone nearby was playing a violin too dramatically, and Emile was once again losing a bet.

''I'm telling you,'' Emile groaned, pointing at George across the circle, ''you did not eat thirteen pancakes at breakfast. That's biologically impossible.''

''I have a witness who's willing to testify!'' George declared proudly, ''Bill, tell him.''

''I may have closed my eyes and not seen your heroic accomplishment,'' Bill replied from his spot on the grass.

''What? The whole time? Are you really that sleep-deprived?'' George moaned.

''Deepfake,'' muttered Ewen, sipping from a juice box.

''You guys are so dumb,'' Becky sighed, tossing a small grape into her mouth without missing. ''Why do we hang out with you again?''

''To bask in our unmatched masculine energy,'' Bill chimed in without batting an eye.

''Debatable,'' Damian muttered, arms crossed, but he was smiling slightly.

Anya sat beside Becky, hugging her knees and watching the scene displayed in front of her with bright eyes. She was wearing her father's green cardigan over her school uniform—it was way too big for her, and the sleeves swallowed her hands.

''Don't you wear that thing like, every day?'' Damian teased, flicking the end of her sleeve.

''It's comfy, and it hides my hands when I wanna steal snacks, Sy-on boy,'' Anya said matter-of-factly. She wiggled her hidden fingers ominously.

''Note to self,'' Becky said, ''never leave food unattended around you again.''

''I make no promises,'' Anya grinned.

Damian leaned back on his hands, watching her for a second longer than he meant to. She was laughing at Becky's reply, her pink hair glowing in the sunlight, eyes crinkled at the corners.

She looks so happy today.

Is it because we're all together?

Or maybe just because she's—

''You're staring again,'' George whispered, suddenly right next to him.

''And smiling like a lovesick idiot,'' Ewen added.

Damian nearly choked. ''I was not! Shut up, both of you!''

''I literally saw your soul leave your body when she smiled,'' Emile snickered.

''I will fight you all,'' Damian hissed, face flaming. Across the circle, Anya glanced over at the commotion.

Huh? What are they whispering about? Is it about me? Wait... is he blushing?

Weird...

... but kinda cute though.

She abruptly halted, cheeks warming.

Where did that come from?

But she regained her composure. ''Stop being weird over there,'' she called casually.

''You're one to talk,'' Damian shot back, but his voice was light.

Bill stood up suddenly, stretching. ''You guys wanna go grab some stuff from the cafeteria? I'm starving.''

''I'm in,'' George said. ''I need a soda to wash down my pancake-related trauma.''

''Race you there!'' Emile yelled, already sprinting.

The group started peeling off one by one. Becky nudged Anya, ''You coming?''

''In a sec,'' Anya said.

Soon, only she and Damian were left in the courtyard. It got quiet for a moment, just the sound of leaves rustling and some bird singing way too enthusiastically.

Damian looked at her. ''You really like hanging out with us all, huh?''

Anya blinked at him. ''Yeah. We're like... I dunno. A bunch of weird puzzle pieces that somehow fit?''

''That's one way to describe it,'' he said, chuckling. ''But yeah. I think so too.''

A silence settled again. It wasn't uncomfortable. Just... something that felt like waiting.

''You have changed,'' Anya said suddenly.

Damian raised a brow. ''Huh?''

''You're not mean anymore.''

''I was never mean.''

''You called me a goblin like three times back in second year.''

''You were acting like a goblin,'' was his excuse.

Anya laughed. ''Okay, maybe I was. But still. You're nicer now.''

Damian looked down at the stone path beneath his feet. ''I guess... I just started trying to be honest with people.''

''Even with me?'' she asked, tilting her head.

He looked up, eyes meeting hers. For a second, he looked like he might actually say something serious.

''Especially with you.''

Anya's breath caught in her throat.

And then Becky yelled from the distance, ''ANYA! HURRY UP OR I'M DRINKING YOUR STRAWBERRY MILK!''

''NO WAY!'' Anya jumped up like she'd been electrocuted. ''That's my emotional support milk!''

She darted off, then turned back for a second. ''You coming, Lord Honesty?''

She offered her hand to help him up. He gladly took it.

''Yeah,'' Damian stood, rolling his eyes fondly. ''Let's go.''

Chapter Text

Damian Desmond was not used to feeling powerless.

He'd grown up learning how to command a room. Being a Desmond meant being in control—of emotions, of outcomes, of everything.

But none of that came in handy now, as he sat in the back corner of the courtyard during lunch break, watching a boy named Kai make Anya Forger laugh.

Again.

Kai wasn't part of their usual friend group—he'd transferred to Eden only a month ago. Tall, confident, and apparently good at chemistry, Kai had slotted himself into campus life like he'd always belonged.

Honestly, Damian couldn't blame him for liking Anya. Because who wouldn't? She was smart (in her own way), funny (in her own way too), brave, endlessly kind, generous, and beautiful.

And lately, she'd been spending a lot of time with Kai.

Damian gritted his teeth as he watched the two of them from a distance. Anya stood beside Becky, who had her arms crossed and was giving Kai a look that could set trees on fire—Damian knew that she was way committed to his and Anya's relationship, for a new guy to come now and destroy her fantasies. But Anya? Anya was laughing at something Kai said, her pink hair bouncing, her smile wide and effortless.

Of course she was being nice to him. That's who she was.

But something about the way Kai looked at her made Damian's stomach churn.

Ewen plopped down beside him, balancing his lunch tray on one knee. ''Yo, you okay, man? You've been glaring at Anya and Kai for, like... fifteen minutes. Not that I'm keeping track.''

''I'm not glaring,'' Damian muttered.

Emile sat on the other side, chewing loudly on a baguette. ''You totally are.''

''Maybe he's in love,'' Ewen teased, grinning wickedly.

''I am not—'' Damian stopped himself. He forced a breath through his nose. ''I'm just... thinking.''

''Sure,'' Emile snorted. ''About how beautiful Anya looks today.''

Thank God neither George nor Bill were with them at that moment, because they also would have teased him mercilessly.

Damian shot him an outrageous look, but Ewen went on and elbowed him. ''Dude. That new guy's been talking to her every day. You're gonna let him steal your girl?''

''She's not my—''

Damian couldn't finish the sentence. Because Anya wasn't his. He had no right to decide who she could talk to, because Anya wasn't an object. And besides, they weren't even dating. They were friends—closer than they used to be, sure. They studied together. They sat next to each other in literature. She always saved him the red bean buns during lunch even though he never accepted them, because he knew they were her favorite. So he knew he had no right to be jealous.

But I can't help it.

Even though I don't want to be selfish.

He wanted to tell her all of this. To explain that he cared—he had always cared. That he looked up to her. That she was important to him.

Maybe someday he would.

But now?

Now some other guy was doing all the things he hadn't been brave enough to do.

And he couldn't stand it.

Later that day, when Anya found him in the library, Damian was trying (and failing) to focus on his textbook.

''Hey, Sy-on boy,'' she greeted, plopping down across from him.

He looked up, heart still aching from earlier.

''Why are you avoiding lunch?''

''I wasn't avoiding it,'' he muttered. ''Just... wanted some quiet.''

Anya tilted her head, studying him. ''You seem upset.''

''Look,'' he started, voice low. He didn't know how he had the guts, but said, ''I know it's stupid. But... I'm jealous.''

Anya blinked. ''Jealous?'' she repeated softly.

He nodded. ''I saw you with Kai. You were... laughing, having fun.''

Anya looked puzzled. Before she could say something, Damian went on. ''I know. And he's not a bad guy. If anyone's lucky, it's him.'' Damian's voice cracked a little, but he kept going. ''I mean, you probably figured it out long ago, but I can't keep my eyes off you. My brain can't function properly when you're around.'' Anya looked a bit hurt, so Damian quickly rephrased it, ''In a good way. And if you read my mind whenever I think about you, you'd know I’ve felt like this for a long time.''

''But...''

''You don't have to say anything now,'' he added. ''I just needed you to know. I can't help feeling jealous.''

Her puzzled expression disappeared, and Anya looked at Damian with honest kindness.

''I'm not interested in Kai.''

Damian blinked, caught off guard by her calm tone.

''I'm not,'' she repeated, shaking her head. ''He's nice and all, but... I don't feel that way about him. At all.''

 Damian ran a hand through his hair, unsure how to respond. ''I'm sorry if I made it weird. I didn't want you to feel like you owe me an explanation.''

''I don't feel that way. I never feel that way with you,'' Anya replied. ''And I'm glad you told me. We're friends. That's what matters, right?''

He nodded with a small smile. ''Yeah. Friends.''

However, while she was riding the bus on her way back home, Anya realized that while Damian had truly opened up about his feelings, she hadn't been completely honest with him.